#it's also coming off more as more of a filler chapter which i hate but i've already written it twice

[feelbokkie]

just a heads up, chapter 14 is 3.5k words unedited. i have literally one more scene to write so it'll probably be about roughly 4k words

[mobbothetrue]

I’ve reached the point in my Fairy Tail rewatch where it’s further along than tfd ever got, which means shit keeps happening that makes me go “fucking WHAT”

[whimsicalwritingsandmore]

Want You Back | ateez x reader

Pairing: werewolf!ot8!ateez x werewolf!reader

Genre: fluff mostly, romance, poly, a little angst?

Warnings for this chapter: none

Word Count: 1452 words

a/n: I'm considering this more of a filler chapter and the next chapter shall be the juicy one hehehehe. :') Enjoy! <3

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Chapter 6

At first, life continued to be monotone for the rest of the boys. The only difference was Mingi’s departure which added further strain on the already overburdened household. Seonghwa and Hongjoong were no longer on speaking terms after the dinner, as Seonghwa demanded Hongjoong to get his mom off their backs but the latter argued that he tried and he didn’t know what else to do.

“Well if you tried harder instead of fooling around with Lila.” Seonghwa accused.

“You’re really playing it like that? You were also hanging out with Lila a lot at one point to Seonghwa.” Hongjoong spat back. 

“Yes and it was a big mistake on my part. She’s not my mate, Y/N is, and I’ll be damned Hongjoong if I lose Y/N because of your negligence,” Seonghwa explained, “Like really, why are you hanging around Lila so much? Don’t you feel an ounce of remorse?”

“I-” 

This was the first time since a week and a half that the two oldest said anything to each other. But Hongjoong was cut off when he felt it - he felt you, and given Seonghwa’s wide eyes and surprised face, he knew he wasn’t imagining things. Both of them were snapped out of their dazes when Wooyoung screamed and there was loud banging and slamming of doors coming from upstairs.

The boys were confused and panicked. They felt you after so long but something wasn't right. It appeared to be like a call for help but they had no idea where you were. And Mingi was still gone too.

Chaos erupted. San paced back and forth, hands behind his back, a worried look plastered on his face. Seonghwa leaned against the window and stared outside angrily. He had a lot of thoughts swirling through his mind at the moment. Meanwhile, on the far end of the living room, Wooyoung and Yeosang sat on the floor with scattered books trying to figure out what was going on. Wooyoung chucking away anything that wasn’t helpful at Yunho’s direction, who alongside Jongho remained quiet but unsettled. Hongjoong sat in a chair with a blank expression.

And then there was Mingi, who stood outside the large mansion wondering if he could just go back to you.

Mingi wasn't sure how this was going to go. In all honesty, he didn't plan to tell them immediately when he got back. The way he considered this unravelling was more like: he might get some dinner first and then break the news over dessert or after dinner. It was a long journey after all. But now that the boys were aware, dinner might have to wait.

"Mingi." Hongjoong's father called from the front door.

He had just arrived to check on the boys and was astonished to see the tall wolf. He wasn’t expecting him to return so soon, but given Mingi’s expression, he knew something happened.

“Why are you standing outside like that?”

“Well…you see…” Mingi started.

Everyone's heads snapped to the front entrance of the mansion when the familiar aura walked in. In the foyer, Mingi stood with an uncomfortable look. He hated attention like this. Maybe he should’ve brought Chan for moral support.

Seonghwa rushed to his side, getting straight to the point.

"Mingi, you felt it too didn't you?" 

Mingi only nodded.

"And!? Where were you!?" Wooyoung chastised. 

"Calm down Wooyoung." Yunho tried to pacify the second youngest.

"Tell that to San. He'll make a ditch on the floor just now."

San stopped pacing and glared at the younger alpha before turning to Mingi.

"Seriously though Mingi, where were you? You left for a week and a half and then suddenly we felt a pull from Y/N?"

Where should I begin? Mingi wondered. He glanced briefly at Hongjoong who eyed Mingi carefully. Deep down Mingi had a feeling that Hongjoong may have already put the pieces together.

"I felt it too…” he began, “And she's okay."

All the other six pairs of eyes snapped in shock and astonishment at Mingi’s bombshell. 

"She's...okay? Mingi did you—" Yeosang started.

"I found her, I've been with her for the past week and a half. She got cornered earlier by some rogues but she's safe now."

Suddenly, time felt like it froze for all of them. Like the slow movement from a sand glass, as the grains of sand leisurely and steadily move down, everything began to stir in slow motion as they processed what Mingi just said.

"You—you found her?" Jongho spluttered.

Mingi only nodded again.

"And? You didn't bother to tell us," Hongjoong vocalised, "What, were you only going to keep her for yourself?"

"Hongjoong." His father warned.

"No, it's a valid question Father. You said you needed time by yourself Mingi, but now suddenly, you’re telling us that you were with Y/N and you didn't notify us. This is how we find out."

"She was always sneaky." Hongjoong's mother condemned.

"NO!" Mingi warned loudly, "Mrs Kim, I have respect for you as you are an elder but please do not even think about slandering Y/N, she's been through enough especially from you."

Mrs Kim scoffed rudely, “How dare you speak to me like that!”

“He’s right,” Mr Kim announced, “There is no need for your input if you don’t have anything helpful to add.”

“You-”

Hongjoong ignored his mother and continued to interrogate Mingi.

"And what about us Mingi? We haven't been through enough? Seonghwa hasn't been sleeping, San and Jongho didn’t leave their rooms, none of us have been able to function. And Y/N didn't even try to communicate with us!"

"And why should she? Mingi asserted, “We never even listened to her when she was here, we weren't there for her, we wrote her and her feelings off every time. Really Hongjoong, are you just trying to run away from the fact that we failed her? Do you not want to take accountability? Is that why you’re running around with Lila?"

Hongjoong bolted upright to tackle Mingi by his shirt’s collar but he was held back by Seonghwa.

“What is it with you all and accusing Lila and I? What, I can’t have a friend to talk to?”

Mingi glowered at the pack’s leader. He had a feeling deep in his gut but he was hoping that it was wrong. 

“We did," Yunho answered, “We did hurt her, and we weren’t there for her. I don’t blame her either.”

"Exactly and comments from Mrs Kim are not helping either,” Seonghwa responded, “She kept pushing Lila time and time again and we saw Lila more than we saw our actual soulmate. And we allowed it, we didn't stop to think that we should make an effort, we just expected Y/N to be there." 

“You too Seonghwa?” Can’t you see that girl-” Mrs Kim began.

"He's right and that’s enough from you," Hongjoong's father commented, "Where is she now Mingi?"

"The human realm."

"What!?" All seven voices boomed through the room.

You were in the human realm? The forbidden realm?

"She's in the human realm and she's running a very successful café,” Mingi explained, “she's got a degree and I'm going back to her."

"Wait a minute, Mingi..." San started.

"I hope you will also decide to come. We all need to apologise. A friend of hers, Chan, he's a wizard and he helped me get here and is waiting for me to come back."

They felt empty. They pushed you away to the point where you built a whole new life without them in another realm. Besides Hongjoong though, the others didn’t blame you - they couldn’t blame you, they were the ones who alienated you from them. All they hoped right now was that you would at least consider forgiving them and give them a second chance.

 Mingi looked at them with his eyes downcasted as he turned to leave.

"We owe it to her."

Meanwhile, you were restless. Any attempt to try and ease your mind proved fruitless. You paced back and forth, fiddled with your fingers and huffed in annoyance at yourself. You decided that maybe a change of scenery would do you good, so you grabbed your jacket and scarf to head out for a bite to eat. Maybe some soup would help. As you made a beeline for your cafe to ensure the security alarm was active and everything was safe and secured, you felt it again.

The magnetic pull just like the night when Mingi arrived. Looking around, you turned to the large window that always provided a picturesque view of the busy streets of Seoul. 

But this time, on the other side of the window, there stood your eight mates.

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Tag list:

@eastleighsblog @sehun096rainbow @greensnakeglobep @satsuri3su @zonked-times @sugarrush-blush @lomons @explorewithd @chatsgotmytongue @scarfac3 @popcatx0 @angrynightnight @sannieluvrr @idfkeddieishot

[talkdutchtome]

You Should Have Said No Chapter Six- Mean

pairing . . . max verstappen x reader / pierre gasly x reader )

summary . . . when your fiancé cheats on you, you strike up an unusual friendship with one of his closest friends, who just so happens to have had a crush on you since he set eyes on you. chaos ensues.

inspired by the works of miss taylor swift )

genre . . . angst )

song . . . mean - taylor swift)

warning . . . cheating, mental illness, angst, eventual smut, poorly translated french and dutch, swearing, mention of parent loss, emotionally abusive parent, slight social media au, kendall jenner as fc (potentially more i’ll add as i go along)

a/n . . . i'm so sorry that it's been so long but here is chapter six. it is unfortuatly a lot of filler which i hate to do but i sat for ages trying to figure it out and i just couldn't move the story on without it. also i'm thinking on doing a mini .5 chapter with pierre's pov so let me know if this is something you'd want )

The first thing you noticed when you woke up on your hotel bed, still in the clothes and make up from last night, was the pounding headache that made you feel like room was spinning; the second thing you noticed was the overwhelming feeling of dread at the very pit of your stomach. Despite this, for a few blissful seconds you didn’t remember what it was you did that made you feel such a way. But when the realization hit you, the feeling of dread in your stomach started to rise to the back of your throat until you had to clamper off your bed and to the toilet to bring up the many, many tequila shots that you had taken last night. After getting everything up and feeling marginally better you sat on the hotel bathroom floor with your head between your knees and began processing what had happened last night. Max said you looked beautiful. You kissed Max. You kissed Max and then slammed the door in his face. Why would you do that? Do you like Max as more than a friend? What about Pierre? Questions ran through your head rapidly making the room spin even more than before. “I need to talk to Lila” you spoke aloud to yourself before finally getting the balance to stand up and walk towards the bedside table where your phone sat, although the messages waiting for you on the screen threatened to bring up the remaining food and drink in your stomach.  

Max Verstappen 

Hey Y/N, thanks for a good night last night. Let me know if you need a ride back to Monaco; Lando and Danny have already gone so it would just be us.  

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. What the hell were you supposed to do? It’s not like you can sit on a private plane for hours with Max after kissing him and then slamming the door in his face. He will inevitably have questions and considering you can’t even answer your own questions about your actions, you’d be willing to bet your life on the fact that you wouldn’t be able to answer his. After staring at his text for what felt like forever, you eventually decided that it would be best to just not reply right now and make your own way home. Space between yourself and the Dutchman was probably for the best, at least until you can figure out what the hell was going on.  

“Jesus Y/N I’ve been gone less than 24 hours, you can’t miss me that much already” you heard your best friend’s voice come through the speaker, she picked up on the first ring, of course she did; she always was able to tell when something was wrong. However, hearing her voice; rather than comforting you made you fall apart sobbing.  

“Y/N?? What’s happened? What’s wrong?” Lila’s voice became concerned, she more than anyone knew that you didn’t like to cry and that you very rarely did.  

“I fucked up Lils. I really fucked up.” you told her through gasped breaths earning yourself a worried sigh from your best friend.  

“Okay what did-” she asked but you cut her off, unable to contain it any further. “I kissed Max” You braced yourself for Lila to scold you for being so stupid and careless, instead her amused laugh came pouring out of the speaker; only confusing you further.  

“Why is this a bad thing Y/N, he’s hot, you’re single. I don’t see the problem” she spoke after catching her breath from laughing. “Lila come on there’s about a hundred reasons why it’s a problem; I’m only just out of a long-term relationship, a relationship where I was engaged to be married. Max is Pierre’s friend, and this could ruin their relationship. Max is my friend, and this could defiantly ruin our relationship. Pierre is-” you rambled and when Lila saw that there was clearly no stopping point for your list, she interrupted you. “Babe, forget about Pierre for a second. Do you like Max?” Her question, though not entirely unexpected, made your head spin; did you like Max? He was attractive, there was no denying that, he was smart and funny and kind. Maybe you did like him. Maybe. Was it even possible to like someone so soon after such an intense break up. If you did like him what would that even mean? It’s not like you could be in a relationship with him, not after Pierre.  

“Helllo Y/N you still there?” Lila’s voice awoke you from your spiraling thoughts “ I’m going to assume that that long drawn-out silence means maybe. You know this doesn’t have to be a bad thing; he clearly likes you too. Nobody is saying you need to jump into a committed relationship with him straight away but what’s wrong with a bit of fun?”  

“No what about Pierre, that would kill him”  

“Kill him like he killed you?” her words cut deep. There was truth to them of course there was, after what Pierre did to you, you owe him nothing at all. But when you loved someone for 14 years how can you do something you know would crush them, even if they have hurt you. The ugly truth that you didn’t want to admit even to yourself, was that you weren’t even sure if your story with Pierre was over. The love you shared with Pierre was the strongest and most unwavering thing you had ever known until that night in Monaco. Pierre wasn’t just your boyfriend or your fiancé, he was your person. The dreams of having a family and growing old with him hadn’t just disappeared because of what he did.  

“I need to go Lila, I need to find a way back to Monaco” 

Arriving back to your flat in Monaco after a very long very hot commercial flight only further deepened your confusion. Here you were in the place that you and Pierre had made your own, the place that you had spent a large portion of your adult life living; but Pierre wasn’t here. Come to think of it you actually had no idea where he was or where he was living at the moment. As if on cue, at that moment your phone began to ring with Pierre’s name lighting up the screen; you thought about not answering- realistically nothing good could come from the conversation, but truth be told you missed him, you missed his presence and the way he made you feel.  

“Oh, hey Y/N. Sorry I didn’t think you were going to pick up. Are you back in Monaco?” he asked and his voice made your stomach flutter, you knew it wasn’t healthy, but you couldn’t help but feel yourself relax hearing that oh-so familiar voice.  

“Yeah, I just got back” 

“Okay can I come round?” he asked, and your heart dropped. As much as you did miss him and in theory wanted to be around him again, in practice it wasn’t something you thought should happen. In your heart you might still be holding out hope that there was a way to fix things but, in your head, you know there isn’t. But despite you’re not being sure that if, being around him in the place you built your lives together, your head would win over your heart. Could you be rational when the love of your life is standing in front of you? 

“It’s just I need to get some stuff and I wanted to talk. I need to know whether or not I need to look for somewhere to live.” He clarified and despite your better judgement you agreed. 

Once your phone call with Pierre had finished you caught sight of a notification on your phone that made your earth shake. Your dad had texted you. After your mum died, your dad began to spiral. He would get black out drunk every night just to numb the pain. He completely blanked you, citing that you just looked too much like your mother. Eventually the alcohol led to drugs and the drugs led to the loving, caring man you knew be replaced by somebody cold and heartless. Growing up in that environment was one of the worst, darkest periods of your life so when you grew older you got out of there. Since you had moved away from the small little town, haunted by the memories of what your life could have been if you mum didn’t die; contact between you and your dad had been extremely limited- only speaking once every few years. He knew that you were living with Pierre and working alongside him in Formula One but that was mostly it. Despite the fact that he could never find a nice word to say about you, he liked Pierre. He had told you on a number of occasions that Pierre was a good man and that you were extremely lucky to have him.  

The phone rang. He was calling you. Your heart rate increased, and you could feel the palms of your hands become clammy. In spite of all the horrible things he did and said to you over the years, he was still your dad; so, you answered.  

“Y/N. I need money.” his voice came through slurred. He was intoxicated, best case drunk worst case high. You had given money to him a handful of times but with your relationship with Pierre being up in the air and therefore potentially your job too, you just didn’t have the money to spare. 

“I’m sorry dad I can’t. I think I need to move soon so I can’t afford it” you spoke your voice no more than a whisper.  

“Oh, don’t pretend you’re not loaded. I know how much Pierre makes” your breath hitched; you were going to need to tell him.  

“We are- Dad, Pierre and I aren’t together anymore. He ch-” he interrupted you before you could finish the sentence. 

“Oh, you stupid little bitch how did you let that happen. Pierre was the best thing that ever happened to you.” your eyes started to water, you opened your mouth to say something, but he continued. 

“Although it’s no surprise, he was always too good for you. I’m just shocked it took him this long to realize.” The tears were streaming down your face now, you wanted to argue, to put him in his place; but you couldn’t. 

“I know.” Your voice was weak, the words were met with a scoff from your father before he hung up, clearly done with the disappointment that was his only daughter. Loud sobs escaped your lips. He was right after all. Pierre had always been too good for you and it’s no surprise that he eventually found someone who was better. Your dad’s words were knives that he had used against me for years now, he would take pleasure in knocking me off my feet, take pleasure in making me feel like I’m nothing. This was nothing new, but the cuts stung so much deeper now, because you didn’t have the love of your life beside you, assuring that you dad is nothing but a mean man who would say whatever he could to hurt you.  

A knocking at the door pulled you from your thoughts but the tears wouldn’t stop falling, the sobs wouldn’t stop escaping. Trying to breathe whilst sitting still was almost impossible, there was no way you could get up to get to the door. So, you ignored it, willing whoever it was to go away. However instead of going away, the person behind the door simply put a key in the door and let himself in. It was Pierre. He ran towards you, clearly not expecting to see you in such a state.  

“Y/N, what’s wrong? What’s happened come on baby tell me” His soft voice spoke, he knelt to the ground Infront of the seat you were sat on, so your faces were level. His hands found your hair, brushing softly in an attempt to calm you down. You tried to explain, tried to tell him about your dad but between the sobs that broke up your words and the shortness of breath you had, Pierre couldn’t understand anything you were saying. Instead of pressuring you to explain, Pierre simply stood up, scooped you up in his arms and walked with you into the bedroom. Placing you gently onto the bed, he then got on too and held you tight. Whilst he was aware that he really had no right to do this anymore, you needed help right now and this is the way he had helped you a million times before with anxiety attacks. He sat with you in his arms, stroking your hair and whispering in your ear until you began to calm down and relax a bit. And when you were able to, you told him about your dad, and once you had started telling you just couldn’t seem to stop, so you told him about everything you were worried about this morning, including the feelings you had been having surrounding your relationship with Pierre as well as the kiss between you and Max. That last piece of information made his heart sink, he wanted to talk more about it, to find out everything that happened, was it Max that initiated it? Was it you? Despite that, however he knew that what you needed to talk about was your dad, so he put his feelings to one side and talked to you about your call with your dad.  

“You know that what he said isn’t true don’t you ma belle. In fact, it’s the opposite. You were always too good for me”. He whispered in your ear, still holding you tight. Eventually, sleep came, and in the arms of the person you have loved for 14 years, you had the best sleep you had had in a week.  

Waking up alone after falling asleep with someone was an extremely empty feeling, so when you woke up in bed by yourself a few hours later, you couldn’t help but feel disappointed. Your eyes fell to a note on the bedside table.  

I’m sorry I had to leave, but I didn’t think us sleeping in the bed right now was appropriate. I know how frazzled your brain can get after an anxiety attack and I didn’t want you to wake up with any regret. You know where I am if you need me.  

P. 

His reasoning made sense; with how confused you are right now, waking up to him next to you again would only make matters worse. It was late now, almost 11pm but as you had slept all day, there was no chance you were going to be able to go back to bed now, so instead you went to the living room and put on your favorite movie. You were so lost, so confused; but you couldn’t think about that right now. You needed to chill, to take a bit of time for yourself and forget about Max, forget about Pierre, forget about everything. About 20 minutes into your movie, however, there was a knock at the door once again. Even though you knew that there was going to be nobody standing there that you wanted to speak to right now, you went and answered it anyway. Stood in the darkness was Max Verstappen. His eyes poured directly into yours, his hands ran through his hair in the form of a nervous twitch.  

“Can we talk?” 

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[tobiasdrake]

Do you have any thoughts on the Red ribbon army?

The RRA will left a mark on the history of Dragon Ball and will forever be a cornerstone of this entire series.

The Red Ribbon Army serves the purpose of bridging the gap between the silly and lighthearted antics of the first two arcs and the gradually more serious fare to come.

They offer Goku some interesting and creative challenges to overcome, while rarely being too threatening. For the most part, Goku bulldozes through everything they have to offer.

Hey, remember that time Goku sodomized a ninja? Good times.

But this goofy fare is juxtaposed against the real, serious menace of what the RRA is doing to the people around them.

Despite the ease with which Goku handles most problems that come his way, this feels tonally different from the first arc. There, the villains were local problems like a mountain on fire or a rabbit gangster. The closest thing to a serious villain was Pilaf of all people, and he just showed up with his Empire of Two Minions at the very end; Less a serious villain and more the last of the local problems.

Now Goku's fighting a geopolitical entity whose tendrils reach out across the world. The scope of this conflict isn't about what they can do to Goku. It's about what they are doing to other people.

These guys suck. Like. Professionally.

Also if you know who that child at knifepoint is then you know exactly how bad this is about to go for General Blue.

Hey, remember that time when Arale from Dr. Slump showed up for some reason to headbutt a Nazi in the balls with planet-splitting force? Good times.

I cannot stress enough that the Dr. Slump crossover is not anime filler. I just. I cannot stress that enough. This is an actual thing that happened in manga canon.

The RRA rarely pushes Goku, but that's not to say they're completely harmless either. General White gets a good shot in on Goku with his hyper-gun.

We've already seen that Goku isn't completely bulletproof; He takes some damage from getting shot with a gun.

So it's not clear how much stronger the hyper-gun is than a regular gun. Obviously not enough to penetrate Goku's skull. But I digress. Meanwhile, General Blue's paralyzing stare gives him an edge, since even he can't take Goku in a straight fight.

As an aside, I love how he menacingly approaches Goku while giggling and grasping the rock he was about to crush Krillin's skull with a moment ago. With the implication that he's going to bash Goku's skull with it instead.

But at the start of next chapter, the rock is nowhere to be seen.

So. I guess he had no malicious plans for that rock. He was just holding it and giggling for funsies. He's a rock fondler. We all have our quirks.

Now is probably a good time to mention that the anime added a scene to the Dr. Slump crossover in which General Blue is revealed to be a pedophile. That's it. That's the whole scene. He just stops off momentarily to hit on a little boy. That was something they felt the arc needed.

This does not mix well with Blue's shameless gay-coding in both the manga and anime alike.

So. Yeah. This was already weird and then Toei was like, "He should also be a pedophile. That's a good thing to spend our screentime on."

Thanks. I hate it.

Anyways.

This arc has been milked to death by future Dragon Ball material, and for good reason. The myriad adventures along each sub-arc of RRA has enough things going on that it's easy to hone in on any individual thing and make a story out of it.

This one guy who showed up during the General White portion inspired the entire Cell arc.

The whole-ass characters of Tenshinhan and Chiaotzu spun out of the legendary assassin Taopaipai.

(Who, and I cannot stress this enough, is holding a 20 Years of Assassination half-off sale. Oh my god. Hahahahahaha.)

The Saiyans weren't even a thought in Toriyama's head at the time he wrote this. But the way Goku steamrolls through Red Ribbon is incredible the second time through, with the added context of his heritage.

Later arcs are going to tell us that Goku is from a race of planet-killers, the greatest warriors in the universe, who shatter armies and planetary defenses, slaughtering entire worlds. And you can feel every ounce of that Saiyan heritage on display as Goku rips through the RRA like a force of nature.

There are even still some hooks left hanging, that the series never revisited.

Colonel Violet and General Copper are still out there somewhere. This is all we ever hear from either of them - Though the anime adds a subplot where Violet loots the fucking vault after seeing which way the wind was blowing during Goku's assault. XD

So. Yeah. There's a lot going on in this arc and a lot for future arcs to draw from. Taopaipai himself has the distinguished honor of being the first Serious Threat villain despite his goofier antics like tonguing General Blue to death.

I like how he notes that if you're going to put a professional assassin through the "Kill this man and prove your mettle" test, you gotta pay for that. Even if it's a test of his ability, it's still a hit.

But at least they still got the half-price bargain for Blue's humiliating demise. This is the best time for the discerning shopper to consider adding a few extra murders to their shopping cart.

Taopaipai straddles the line between comical shenanigans and deathly serious threat. This moment is where Serious Dragon Ball is born.

Because again, that is the scope of this arc. Not what the RRA can do to Goku, but what they are doing to people.

Though, for the first time in history, Taopaipai is someone who can fuck up Goku pretty bad too.

We've seen Goku lose fights before but we'd never seen someone body him like this. At least, not without an excuse like a sucker punch or Goku being super hungry or a paralyzing stare or something.

This was a game-changer for Dragon Ball. For the first time, Goku got to go at an opponent with everything he had and got wrecked. Taopaipai took him down with a killshot he only survived because the Dodonpa struck a Dragon Ball he was carrying rather than impacting his flesh.

There's just. So much about this whole arc to gush about. Even Goku's friends get a piece of the action.

Well, most of them do. There is one notable exception who doesn't get the opportunity to show off and unleash his true power. The mightiest of all Goku's allies, and an underrated powerhouse waiting for his day in the sun.

Some day, Turtle. Some day they will all know your might and tremble.

So. Yeah. There's a lot to love here, and it caps off with one of the greatest shocking swerves in the history of Dragon Ball.

Ho. Ly. Shit. The comical pettiness of Commander Red mixed with the serious outrage from Adjutant Black here is such a phenomenal blend of Dragon Ball Goofy and Dragon Ball Serious. And. I. Feel it.

Much like Frieza being a critique of capitalism, the selfishness, lack of empathy, and pettiness of world leaders on display here is something I've only come to better understand as I've gotten older. Commander Red is a silly caricature of a man but he could easily be a real person that exists.

This is what soldiers are used for. All too often, they die for nothing but the selfish and petty whims of men like Red. Adjutant Black was out here Big Bossing it up like a decade before Metal Gear was a thing.

There's a reason why Dragon Ball keeps coming back to this arc. Whether it's the legacy of the RRA in Dr. Gero or DBS: Super Hero, redoing Goku's climb of Karin Tower like four times, or the PTO as a sort of galactic RRA, the Red Ribbon Army left a mark on Dragon Ball whose influence would continue to be felt long after the organization's fall.

They're a cornerstone of Dragon Ball history that will never be forgotten.

[autumnshighlady]

I’ve Always Liked to Play With Fire (part 8)

NESTA ARCHERON X ERIS VANSERRA X FEMALE!READER

summary: you finally meet Emerie and Gwyn, but an argument between Cassian and Nesta spirals out of control and you come head to head with the High Lord

warnings: the usual IC slander

word count: 6k 

DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE

a/n PLEASE READ: so the vote was almost 50/50 between doing a time jump and not doing a time jump, so I decided to meet y’all in the middle. There will be small time jumps, especially in the next chapter, missing a few important ACOSF moments but they will be mentioned briefly. I hope this is ok! Also this is sort of a filler chapter but I think you guys will like it. I’ve put out like 3 chapters in one week I’m exhausted haha

feedback is appreciated, just no hate pls! these are just my opinions, i’m more curious to see how you all like the writing and characterization and storylines!

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

part 6

part 7

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“Are you even listening?”

“No, not really.”

Azriel rolled his eyes at you for what was probably the fifth time that hour. You were sitting in an office area of the House, a map of the Night Court laid out in front of you. Scrolls and manuscript were strewn across the desk messily, as if whoever had been in here last had not bothered to organize it. The soft glow of lanterns illuminated the table in an otherwise dark room, the window nearby facing the mountains rather than the vibrant city below. Azriel had followed through on his promise to teach you about the Night Court before your other training resumed, actually letting you sleep in for once.

Just this one time. He had promised, and you knew he’d meant it.

You had covered Illyria so far, to your distaste as much as Azriel’s. It was interesting how much he loathed his own people, but after delving into their practices you could see why.

“And Rhysand just lets this happen? He allows females be crippled and used for breeding?” You had asked when the spymaster told you about the wing-clipping practice.

“Illyrians are slow to change.” Was all Azriel had said. You pointed out that oh-so powerful Rhysand could simply make them change, or use his mind control abilities to influence the Illyrian leaders. But Azriel had only glared at you, ignoring your comment before moving onto the next subject – the Court of Nightmares.

Which led you to where you were now.

“So let me get this straight,” You said after Azriel rolled his eyes. “The Court of Nightmares is in the Hewn City, and that’s the side of the Night Court that the rest of the world sees and views it to be.”

“Correct.” Azriel huffed, blue siphons reflecting strange casts of light from the lanterns.

You straightened your back. “So my same point as Illyria still stands. Females are suffering there too – you said the Morrigan was rescued from her own family from that very court. But why’s she the only one being saved? What about all the other females in there being sold off into marriage like cattle?”

Azriel’s scarred knuckles tightened in annoyance. His voice was clipped and tense, as you were clearly testing his patience. “Like I said twice already,” He said through gritted teeth. “Change does not come easy. And besides, they have an agreement of sorts. Rhysand lets them do what they please, in exchange for recognizing his authority and providing an army if needed.”

“But you said they have the right to refuse.” You pointed out.

“Yes. The Court of Nightmares has autonomy within the Night Court. It’s the best way to keep the peace.”

“Except for the females.” You muttered, fiddling with a scrap of paper and tearing it up in your fingers. It wasn’t fair how Rhysand and Feyre had the power to help so many people, yet choose to keep things the way they are. Nesta had told you that Feyre often shifted into an Illyrian form – wings unclipped and able to fly her through the sky, above all the female Illyrians down below who were crippled and kept for breeding. The thought of her flaunting those wings when half of the Illyrian population had them taken away simply for being born female made you sick. But it was something to consider for your long-term plan.

“I know it’s hard for you to understand,” Azriel said lowly. “And I know it’s hard for you to hear this as a female. But we help out where we can with the resources we have.”

“No you really don’t.” You scoffed, and then spoke again before the shadowsinger could object. “But if that’s what you have to tell yourself to sleep at night then by all means.”

Azriel huffed, and you felt another twinge of guilt. It wasn’t entirely his fault – he had no authority over the High Lord and Lady, he couldn’t go behind their backs or tell them what to do. You wanted to like Azriel, and a part of you did. But the other part was resentful that like the rest of the Inner Circle, he did nothing to challenge their ways.

“I am trying to help you.” Azriel said slowly, turning his hazel eyes to yours. “I wasn’t lying when I told Rhysand that you had potential. You’re a quick learner, and you’re extremely clever. I want you to succeed and find your place in this court, but I can’t help you do that if you fight back with snarky comments every chance you get.”

“Have you considered that maybe adjusting to your court is difficult for me considering where I came from?” You challenged, meeting his gaze with your own. “Forgive me if it takes some time for me to come to terms that I live in a court where if I had wings or was born in the Hewn City my only purpose would be for breeding.”

“You haven’t been here for long,” Azriel said cooly. “Give it time.”

You sighed, dropping the remains of the paper onto the desk. “If you say so.”

Azriel stared at you for a minute, unblinking. It was impossible to read his expression, as usual. A strand of dark hair fell onto his forehead artfully, contrasting with the golden light and making him look like a painting. “What?” Your tone came out snappier than intended.

“I think you should spend some time with people from this court who aren’t part of the Inner Circle.” He suggested slowly, as if waiting for you to lash out. “Instead of just training with me, you can join the sessions with Cassian and the others. Would that be something you’re interested in?”

You paused, weighing your options before considering his words. Would that be something you’re interested in? He was giving you a choice – your first real choice at the Night Court that wasn’t coerced or scripted. If you wanted to say no, there would be no consequences. But then you thought about Nesta, and the friends she had made. You’d be able to meet them this way and get to know them – spending more time with Nesta was a bonus. You’d have more of an excuse to be around her now, and to coordinate your plan.

The fight. You mentally cursed yourself, remembering last the Inner Circle checked, you and Nesta were on the outs. You didn’t want to have to keep up the argument act, but maybe you could stage something else, something that made it seem like the two of you were on the mend. They’d think it was Nesta ‘healing’ because of them and pat themselves on the back, but you’d have to forgive it and let them have this temporary victory before you pull the rug out from under them.

“I guess I could give it a try.” You said hesitantly, nodding at Azriel.

His lips twitched in a small smile. “Good, be ready at 8 tomorrow.”

*********************

You groaned, rubbing your eyes as you stepped into the training ring. Sleep was scarce for you last night, leaving you groggy and tired as you dressed yourself in the leathers laid out for you. You hadn’t seen Nesta yesterday, but you sent her a mental note about planning for today.

The two of you agreed that you would be distant, but not outright avoiding each other to make it seem more real – Nesta would apologize to you, and you to her, making sure Cassian overheard. Everything was set, now all you had to do was survive the grueling training.

As you entered the ring, your eyes scanned for Nesta. She was sitting down near the corner, stretching alongside a pretty redhead and Illyrnian woman. Her eyes were clear, devoid of the empty hauntedness that had resided in them as she recounted the past few weeks. Hair neatly braided back, she snorted at something the Illyrian female had said.

Taking a breath, you nodded to Cassian and walked over to where Nesta was. The general nodded back, glancing towards Azriel who shrugged his shoulders.

You approached hesitantly, making sure to look nervous. You could practically feel Cassian’s gaze boring into the back of your head, analyzing your every movement like a hawk. “Hey,” You said quietly to Nesta.

“Hi.” Her voice was quipped, yet soft. She looked up at you, expression unreadable. You hated having to play these roles, but you pushed that aside.

“Can I join you?” You asked, fiddling with the loose strap on your leathers.

The other two females glanced at Nesta, one of them raising her eyebrows knowingly. You wondered what Nesta had told them about you, how much they knew.

“Actually,” Nesta cleared her throat and stood up, and you could feel Cassian’s gaze shift to her. “I was hoping I could talk to you. Come grab some water with me.”

You followed her, Azriel’s eyes now on you as well. The two Illyrian males tracked your every movement as you headed over to the water station, grabbing a cup from the table. You stood in silence as you took turns filling it up, waiting for Nesta to speak. Finally, she did.

“I wanted to apologize.” Nesta said, swishing the water in her cup. “For how we left things. You were nothing but kind to me, and I lashed out. You were my only friend, and I was cruel to you. For that, I am sorry.”

You bit your lip, resisting the urge to watch Cassian’s reaction. “I’m sorry too,” You said after a few moments. “For what I said about everyone hating you. It was mean, and I didn’t mean it. I’d like to move past it, if we can.”

“Me too.” Nesta’s lips twitched as she spoke to you mentally. Don’t look, but Cassian just broke out into the biggest grin. He’s watching us.

I bet he’s proud of you for apologizing – thinks it’s all because of him.

Well, it’s not.

I know.

You smiled, following Nesta back over to the group. You glanced at Azriel, who gave you a nod of approval. It was working.

“So why did Azriel drag you here?” Nesta spoke up, interrupting your thoughts.

“He thinks it’ll be good for me,” You said, stopping to pick up a mat from the racks. “To spend time with others from the Court.”

Nesta hummed, sitting back down on her stretching mat as you unrolled yours. “Well, this is Gwyn,” She said, gesturing to the redhead. “And this is Emerie.” The Illyrian female raised her hand in greeting.

“I’m (Y/N).” You said, offering a friendly smile. Gwyn’s large, teal eyes gleamed, the freckles on her pale skin were like stardust in the sunlight. She seemed shy, but courageous. You knew she was a priestess in the library, meaning she had likely been through the unthinkable – the fact Nesta was able to convince her to come out of the library made your heart swell with pride.

Emerie glanced up and down at you, a smirk pulling at her lips. “We know,” She said. “We’ve heard all about you.”

You chuckled as Nesta fixed the Illyrian with a stern glare. You’ve told them about me, now have you? You said to Nesta.

Shut up. Her reply was just as stern as her gaze, but there was some lightness to it. Her cheeks were flushed red with embarrassment – it was adorable.

How much do they know? You quickly asked her.

They know we had a fight. They don’t know it was fake, but I think they suspect something. I trust them though, they won’t say anything unless I tell them first. They’re good people.

Works for me.

“We wondered when you’d be joining us.” Gwyn quipped, extending her other leg and reaching down to touch her toes. Nesta turned the other way, focusing on stretching her hip.

“Yeah, well Azriel knew I’d go crazy only seeing his face for the next while so he decided to chuck me in here with you guys.” You said, making Gwyn giggle. “He needs Cassian’s alliance to deal with me sometimes.”

In the distance, Azriel snorted. He’d clearly been listening, which was good. You wanted him to hear everything. You turned to look at him, and he shook his head and sighed. Emerie laughed, missing nothing. “Mother above, what do you do to him?” She said.

You shrugged, clasping your arms behind your back and stretching them behind you. “I make his life hell pretty much, isn’t that right?” You called out the last part loudly.

The shadowsinger walked a few steps toward you, hauling a large mat across the floor. “You certainly don’t make my job easy.” He muttered, setting it down in the middle of the ring.

You rolled your eyes, turning to ask Gwyn about how her training is going but stopped. Gwyn was watching Azriel, teal blue eyes following the movements of his muscled arms as he shuffled equipment around. She caught your gaze, blushing and quickly looking away.

“So,” You said, turning to Nesta. “What are we learning today?”

“More strength exercises, apparently.” Nesta huffed, groaning and clutching her stomach. “My abs are still killing me from yesterday.”

“Are we ready to go, or just going to sit there complaining all day?” Came Cassian’s loud voice. The four of you exchanged a glance, huffing as you stood up and kicked your mats to the side.

You liked Gwyn and Emerie. You could tell Nesta was relaxed around them in a way she wasn’t with the others in the court. You found no jealousy churning in your gut, only pride. Nesta having friends was a huge step, but then you realized something – eventually, you and Nesta would leave the Night Court. Gwyn and Emerie would have to be left behind, unless somehow they were okay with your plan and snuck away with you. But two females fleeing the Night Court was already risky enough, let alone adding two others to the mix.

We’ll worry about that later. You said to yourself, taking a deep breath and extending into the position Cassian was demonstrating.

*********************

“Nesta,” Cassian said after the four of you collapsed onto the mat, panting from exhaustion. “If you were to name a sword, what would you call it?”

Gwyn answered, though she hadn’t been asked, “Silver Majesty.”

Emerie snorted. “Really?”

Gwyn demanded, “What would you call it?”

Emerie considered. “Foe Slayer, or something. Something intimidating.”

You laughed. “That’s no better!”

Nesta’s mouth tugged upward at their teasing. Gwyn looked to her, teal eyes bright. “Which one is worse: Foe Slayer or Silver Majesty?”

“Silver Majesty,” Nesta said, and Emerie crowed with triumph. Gwyn waved a hand, booing.

“What would you call it?” Cassian asked Nesta again. You paused, confused as to why he was so persistent. Apparently, Nesta was the same because she glanced to you before speaking up.

“Why do you want to know?” She asked.

“Humor me.”

She lifted a brow. But then said with all sincerity. “Killer.”

His brows flattened.

Nesta shrugged. “I don’t know. Is it necessary to name a sword?”

“Just tell me: If you had to name a sword, what would you call it?”

“Are you getting her one as a Winter Solstice present?” You asked.

“No.”

“Then why keep asking?” You pressed, eyes fixed on Cassian suspiciously.

Cassian scowled. “Curiosity.”

But his jaw tightened, but you knew it wasn’t that – there was something else.

Why would he want you to name a sword? You asked Nesta.

No idea. She replied. I went to a blacksmith with him a few days ago and helped forge some blades. But that’s it.

“Back to work,” he said, clapping his hands and interrupting your thoughts. “For all that sass, you’re doing double time on the Valkyrie lunge hold.”

Emerie and Gwyn groaned, but Nesta surveyed Cassian for another moment before following their lead. You glanced at Azriel, puzzled, but he averted his gaze. You immediately grew even more suspicious – normally he’d just stare at you with that blank expression, revealing nothing. But his avoidance made you question what he wasn’t telling you.

Just over an hour later, you were back on your stretching mats cooling down. Legs shaking from the grueling exercises, you took a sip of your water before realizing it was empty.

“Here, give it to me.” Emerie said, extending her hand and taking your cup. “Gwyn and I are going to get more water before we all die of thirst.”

“Thanks!” You called out as the Illyrian female and the priestess headed over to the water station. Nesta glanced towards you, and you heard her voice in your head.

I’m going to talk to Cassian.

Before you could stop her, she stood up and stomped over with her arms crossed. You  glanced at Gwyn and Emerie, who were too deep in their own conversation to notice. Continuing to stretch, you listened in the direction of Nesta and Cassian.

“Why were you pestering me about naming a sword?” You heard her demand.

Cassian’s voice sounded in return, trying to sound nonchalant but failing. “I just wanted to know what you’d name one.”

“That’s not an answer. Why do you want to know?”

He crossed his arms, then uncrossed them. “Do you remember when we went to the blacksmith?”

“Yes. He’s giving me a blade for Winter Solstice?”

“He’s given you three. The ones you touched.”

Silence.

You heard the general tapping his foot on the ground. “When you hammered those blades, you imbued them—the two swords and the dagger—with your power. The Cauldron’s power. They’re now magic blades. And I’m not talking nice, pretty magic. I’m talking big, ancient magic that hasn’t been seen in a long, long time. There are no magic weapons left. None. They were either lost or destroyed or dumped in the sea. But you just Made three of them. You created a new Dread Trove. You could create even more objects, if you wished.”

“I Made three magic weapons?” Disbelief rang in her voice.

“We don’t know yet what manner of magic they have, but yes.” You turned towards the water station to see Emerie and Gwyn halting their chatting, as if they could see or sense the shift in Nesta. You turned towards her and Cassian, and you didn’t have to see her face to know anger was rising in her eyes.

“Who is ‘we’?” Nesta hissed.

“What?” Cassian said.

“You said ‘We don’t know what manner of magic they have.’ Who is ‘we’?”

“Rhys and Feyre and the others.”

“And how long have all of you known about this?”

He winced as he realized his error. “I ... Nesta ...”

“How long?” Her voice became sharp as glass. Everyone was watching now.

“This isn’t the place to talk about it.”

“You’re the one trying to coax a name out of me in the middle of training!” She gestured to the ring.

Cassian’s face grew pained. “This isn’t coming out the way it should. We argued about whether to tell you, but we took a vote and it went in your favor. Because we trust you. I just ... hadn’t gotten a chance to bring it up yet.”

“There was a possibility you wouldn’t even tell me? You all sat around and judged me, and then you voted?” You could feel something deep in Nesta’s chest cracking, to know that every horrible thing about her had been analyzed.

“It ... Fuck.” Cassian reached for her, but she stepped back. Everyone was staring now. “Nesta, this isn’t ...”

“Who. Voted. Against me.”

“Rhys and Amren.”

You sucked in a breath. Rhys was not a surprise – he hated Nesta and everyone knew it. You personally were not surprised by Amren, but could tell by the way Nesta froze that she was hurt. She had told you briefly that she shared a sort of friendship with the female once, before it all went to shit.

Cassian’s eyes widened. “Nesta—”

“I’m fine,” She said coldly. “I don’t care.”

She rolled her shoulders and strolled back to where you all were watching. Gwyn and Emerie looked at her with concern, but she did not acknowledge it. She left the ring without looking back at Cassian, or any of you.

Emerie was on her heels instantly, trailing her down the stairs. “What’s wrong?” You heard her say.

“Nothing,” Nesta’s reply came. “Court business.”

“Are you all right?” Gwyn asked, a step behind Emerie.

“Yes.” Nesta said before vanishing down the hallway. You wanted to go after her, but held back, remembering that Cassian and Azriel had to think you two were still only on your way to making full amends.

Talk to me. You begged, but no response came. You heard nothing but felt the roaring in her head. Nesta had gone silent again.

*********************

It had been hours, despite your searching Nesta was nowhere to be found. You looked in every corner of the House you could think – the library, her room, your reading nook, nothing. Nesta had not reached out to you either, but you hoped once she calmed down she would.

Your mind wheeled from earlier. Nesta had made a new trove, and the Inner Circle didn’t even tell her – Cassian wasn’t even going to tell her, he only did because it slipped out by mistake. It was apparent they felt entitled to not only Nesta’s autonomy, but her powers as well.

Stomach churning, you crawled into bed and tried to sleep.

*********************

The next day came, and nothing was heard from Nesta. Azriel had not come to check on you either. Something was wrong.

*********************

Nothing the next day.

*********************

On the third day, you stood on the balcony. Your eyes were puffy from lack of sleep, hair unkept. You hadn’t slept once since Nesta disappeared, and nobody had told you anything. Training was suspended temporarily with no explanation, and worry nagged away at your gut. You had no idea where Nesta was.

Please, You begged her for the millionth time. Let me know you’re okay. I’ll do anything, Nesta. Just… please tell me you’re ok.

You felt a sudden gust of wind behind you, cooling the sweat on the back of your neck. You turned around, seeing Azriel. A few feet behind him was Rhysand, which filled you with dread. The High Lord looked haggard, his raven-black hair disheveled and his black shirt wrinkled. Azriel didn’t look much better either.

You stormed over. “What the hell is going on?” You demanded, not caring who you were talking to. Rage took over, that familiar sea of anger rose inside of you.

“(Y/N)...” Azriel began, taking a step towards you.

“Where have you been?” You cut him off, glaring. “What the hell happened that everyone disappeared for over two days? Where is Nesta?”

“Let me explain–”

“You…” You hissed at Rhysand, pushing past the spymaster. You stormed to the High Lord, who looked defeated. “This is all your fault.”

“What are you talking about?” Rhys’ voice was flat.

“I heard Nesta and Cassian arguing,” You hissed. “She made some sort of magic weapon accidentally and instead of telling her and letting her help decide what to do, you voted about it without her? What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

The High Lord’s violet eyes sharpened, and he glared at you. You felt his presence surrounding you, pushing you to submit to him, to his power. Instead, you ignored it, staring down the male who you hated so much.

“Nesta is fine.” He said sternly.

“Then where is she?” You demanded, cocking your head. “Why did she just disappear?”

Rhysand growled. “She’s with Cassian, they’ve gone away for a couple of days.”

“Rhys…” Azriel’s deep voice sounded from behind you. The High Lord’s simmering violent gaze went glassy for a split second, but enough for you to know that he was telling his spymaster something.

“No,” Azriel said firmly, striding over to face his High Lord. “She deserves to know.”

You furrowed your brows. “Know what?”

Rhysand hissed. “Quiet.”

“No,” Azriel growled. “You put your trust in me to supervise her, and I say that she deserves to know what’s going on.”

“I’m with the shadowsinger on this one.” You said, folding your arms across your chest. Rhysand had not moved, just continued to glare down at you.

He didn’t trust you, that much was easy enough to detect. He still judged you for being from Tamlin’s court, as if you were responsible for Tamlin’s actions against Feyre. No matter how hard you worked, no matter if 500 years went by of you proving your loyalty over and over again to the High Lord, he would never trust you. He would always watch you from the corner of his eye with doubt.

“Fucking tell me.” You growled, fists curling. A scarred hand clasped your shoulder and squeezed, urging you to calm down.

“Come, I’ll explain.” Azriel said softly before glaring at Rhys. “I’m telling her, Rhysand. And if you want to stop me you’re going to have to use that mind control of yours.”

The High Lord’s jaw clenched, darkness filling the area. “I think you’ve grown too close to the matter, Azriel.” His tone was commanding and lethal. “Let’s go.”

“No.” You interjected, yanking your shoulder out from under Azriel’s hand. “You’re going to tell me what happened, right here, right now. And he’s going to shut up and give answers.”

Azriel bit his lip, possibly worried that Rhysand would strike you down there and then. He placed himself between you two. “Okay.” He said firmly. “You know how Feyre is pregnant, right?”

“Yes.” You said, caught off guard for a moment. Azriel’s voice sounded distorted as you got lost in your own mind, recalling Nesta’s words. That’s when we also found out Feyre was pregnant, although Rhys later told us that the pregnancy would kill her since the baby has wings.

“...so he decided to keep it from her until a solution was found.” Azriel continued, recapturing your attention.

“Let me guess, you haven’t found one and Feyre doesn’t know.” You stated, looking at Rhysand instead of Azriel. The High Lord said nothing, only continued clenching his jaw and glaring at you.

“Not yet,” Azriel said calmly. “But she does know now. In her anger from the vote, Nesta decided to storm into the city and tell Feyre about what everyone else knew – that the baby would kill her.”

“Good.” You shot back, furious – while Feyre was far from your favourite person, she was a female who deserved to be able to make a choice about what to do with her body and the baby that was killing her. “Feyre deserved to know, you idiots. How could you keep this from her?”

“Nesta told Feyre to hurt her and to spite me,” Rhysand growled. “Not because she had her best interest in mind.”

No shit, You thought. Nesta owed you nothing. She had all her choices taken from her, and she wasn’t about to let that happen to her sister.

“Shut up, Rhys.” Azriel growled, causing the High Lord to blink in surprise. “But yes, she told her out of anger. Everyone got mad, and Cassian grabbed her to get her out of Velaris. They’re staying in the mountains for a few days until everything calms down.”

Your blood stilled. Something didn’t make sense – you understood taking a few hours apart, but days? Either Azriel wasn’t telling you something, or Rhysand was withholding information from his shadowsinger. You heard stories of the heightened emotions that went along with having a mate. If Feyre was upset and Nesta had been the cause of that, Rhysand would have been angry as hell. Possibly angry enough to….

“You threatened to kill Nesta, didn’t you?” Your voice was barely above a whisper as your gaze landed on the High Lord.

He didn’t answer, so you spoke again, louder. “Didn’t you? That’s why Cassian had to stay away for a few days with Nesta, because he was worried that you’d kill your mate’s sister.”

Azriel furrowed his brows, the first time you’d ever seen him confused. “That’s not true,” He said, but his voice was flat, as if he was trying to convince himself of it as he turned to his High Lord. “Right Rhys?”

The High Lord of the Night Court gave no answer, darkness curling around his fingertips as he stared you down. You could tell he wanted nothing more than to mist you on sight – you laid him bare and tore him down in front of his most trusted friend, exposing him for what he really was. And he hated it.

“Rhys?” Azriel’s voice lowered.

Rhysand finally spoke after a few seconds. “I’m not going to hurt Nesta.”

“But you threatened to?” You challenged.

“Yes.”

Azriel sighed. “Are you fucking kidding me, Rhys?”

A rage that you hadn’t felt before bubbled up inside you. The High Lord of the Night Court, who let the females in Illyria and the Hewn City suffer and be used as breeding cattle, had threatened to kill Nesta, his mate’s sister. Despite how much he claimed to love Feyre, he still treated her like any female of his court by not giving her a choice – he could offer sanctuary to the females in Illyria or the Hewn City like he had with the priestesses in the library, but he didn’t. This male insisted that the monster facade he put on for other courts was purely for show, but you knew that at his core, that’s just who he really was.

And he chased Nesta out of the city because she did what he was too afraid to do.

“This is all your fault, Rhysand.” Your voice was steady, cold as the edge of the sharpest blade. “You didn’t tell your mate that she was going to die, and you threatened to kill Nesta because she let her sister have a choice. You locked her up here because you couldn’t control her like you do the others, pretending like it was for the sake of helping her. You let two thirds of your court live in suffering, then wonder why they hate you. You’re a terrible ruler and an even worse mate, Rhysand. And you will get what’s coming to you.”

The High Lord said nothing as you turned on your heel and strode back into the House, leaving him and Azriel alone on the balcony.

*********************

The next few hours felt like a blur – part of you expected Rhysand to return and rip you to shreds for threatening him. It was stupid of you, but you didn’t regret it – you could tell by the way Azriel’s demeanor changed as he found out Rhys neglected to mention his threat to Nesta’s life that he was shocked, and mad that he was not informed of it. Maybe seeing you stand up to Rhys would give him a backbone after all.

You drifted into sleep, hoping that you wouldn’t wake up in a cell.

*********************

A gentle hand on your shoulder woke you. Your vision was blurry as you lifted a head from the pillow, the sunlight casting a golden glow on the female sitting on your bed.

Nesta.

All sleepiness was gone and you bolted upright, not caring that it made your head spin. Before you could say anything, her arms wrapped around you and held you tight. In your grogginess, you yelped and fell back, head hitting the pillow once again. Nesta followed, still clinging to you as her weight landed on top of you but you didn’t care. The hole in your chest from the past few days swelled as you held the eldest Archeron in your arms again, clutching her as if she would float away.

Tears flowed down your cheeks as Nesta nuzzled her head into your neck, her shoulders shaking, indicating she was crying too. The two of you laid there, Nesta laying on top of you and clutching onto your frame as if you were her lifeline. A white, soft glow began to shine from your sternums, merging into one beautiful light. It filled the room as you held each other in the embrace – life and death entwined into one beautiful force.

“Nesta…” You sobbed, bringing a hand up to cradle her head.

“I’m here.” Her voice was shaky as she spoke into your neck. “I’m here, darling.”

“Azriel told me everything,” You choked out between sobs. “About Feyre and the fight. And the mountains. And Rhys… he threatened to kill you….”

“I’m so sorry…” Nesta’s voice was muffled. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“Shh.. It’s not your fault.”

“I wanted to reach out, I really did. But I couldn’t. I just broke out there, I wanted to die. I couldn’t do it.”

Fresh tears washed out the dried ones, and you held her closer. You wanted to burn Rhysand and his inner circle to the ground for this, for breaking Nesta down until she truly believed she was unworthy of life and love.

“It’s okay,” You said quietly. “You’re here now. You’re safe.”

Nesta took a deep breath, but didn’t lift her head from your neck. She just kept holding you. “We hiked through those mountains for two days.” She whispered, voice hoarse. “Cassian was so mad at me. He had me haul the backpacks, he didn’t notice when I fainted. He didn’t speak to me unless it was to order me to eat or drink. Then when I broke, he held me. I thought he was going to stand up for me, say what Rhys did was wrong, that all of this was wrong. But then he wanted to fuck me just a few hours later. That’s all I am to him, isn’t it? Something to fuck but not enough to love?”

“Did you…?” Your voice trailed off, embarrassed for asking. You felt bad, regretting the question even though it had not fully formed.

“No.” She said quietly. “He was surprised. He tried a few times, but didn’t push it. He respected my decision, but I think he could tell something had changed.”

You inhaled deeply, letting her scent fill your nose. You missed it, craved it while she was gone in a way you couldn’t quite understand. Everything you did, every move and plan you made to escape the Night Court at its core was for Nesta. The female who laid on top of you, curled into your arms, had fought so hard and been through so much. She had been forced into a life she didn’t want, and would have to live in it for the rest of her immortal life. You wanted to get out of the Night Court not just for yourself, but so Nesta could have a chance to truly live.

“Besides,” Nesta said, lifting her head and staring down at you with grey eyes glistening with tears. “Cassian isn’t the one I wanted to do this to.”

Nesta leaned town and pressed her lips against yours. Your eyes fluttered shut as you melted into the kiss, grabbing the back of her neck and pulling her closer. Her soft lips tasted as sweet as you remembered, but this kiss was different than the last one. Last time, it was all fire and desperation, but this one was sure and intimate. Nesta’s weight on top of you was comforting, her legs tangled with yours as she tried to get as close to you as possible. Your lips broke apart for air. Your heart fluttered as she tilted her head and kissed you again, stroking your tear stained cheek with her hand. It was passionate, but not rough or overly sexual like you were pretty sure she was used to with Cassian – it was a kiss that came from the heart, just sexual desire.

The drums of time slowed down as your lips melted together. The glow between your chests continued to shine like starlight, shutting off the outside world. There was no Rhysand to threaten you, no Troves or death gods – it was just you two.

Needing air again, your lips broke apart. Nesta took a shaky breath, pressing her forehead into yours.

“It’s you.” She said breathlessly. “It’s always been you.”

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[breathlesslink]

Chapter Four — Truth

[chapter warnings: cursing, dark past, hints at depression/grief, death topics]

t.o.c ; << | >>

a/n: hi everyone thanks for being so patient w me i know i’m bad at updating regularly idk what my issue is. also this chapter is for sure just a filler to get the reader’s backstory and motivation it’s literally ALL dialogue thank u love u

Pissed was an understatement.

You knew your sleep felt too fulfilling. You felt it in your dreams that you'd been sleeping for too long.

Link had chosen not to wake you for your night shift, opting to sit on a stool next to your bed with a book lying around the stable the entire night.

You felt off, wondering why chirping birds had woken you from your slumber instead of Link, before shooting up in the bed and looking around. It was getting light outside, the clock on one of the support beams of the stable reading "6:20".

Beside you, Link dog-eared the book page and tilted his head innocently. "Are you alright?"

"You!" Your head whipped around to him, "You didn't wake me up!"

"You needed sleep."

"So do you, asshat."

Link shook his head, putting the book down and standing up to stretch. "I slept for 100 years. I'm fully rested still."

You rolled your eyes. "As if."

Still slightly seething, you kicked the blankets off, shivering as the cool air hit your legs. You quickly put your socks and shoes on, grabbing your bag and getting ready to travel. Link was already outside readying the horses, and he handed you an apple for breakfast.

Taz and Epona seemed to follow the trails by heart now, which made it incredibly easy for Link to multitask looking at the paper map. He lifted the sheet up to you, pointing at a specific spot that was marked with an X.

"This mark is supposed to be Zora's Domain." He explains, "It'll probably take a while to get there, especially if we try to just catch stables to rest. Hate to break it to you, but we might be coming upon our first camp."

You groaned, half playfully and half not. Who could blame you, though?

"Goodbye, warm bed." You slumped into Taz's neck, earning a small chuckle from Link. "Are we going to the tower first? To get the actual map on your little gadget?"

"The Sheikah Slate? Yes." Link squinted at the map for a second time. "Before that, though. I want to head back to Impa to talk to her about my memories, so maybe we can take a shortcut through Kakariko to cut down time."

"We'd have to turn back and go down the other trail." You replied.

"It's like, a 10 minute ride back. You'll be fine."

"I'm not complaining!" You gasped, feigning offense. "If anything I'm, uh, rejoicing."

Link quirked an eyebrow. "About what? You can't be that excited to spend more time with me." He teased. The longer you spent with him, the more sassy and talkative he's become. Your only choice is to rival his sarcasm with your own.

"You're gonna make me hurl." You shot back, "In actuality, I want to ask her some things too." Sensing Link's silence as a motion to continue, you did. "She had to have known my parents before my siblings and I got taken. We lived in Kakariko. So maybe she knows something about the night it happened or anything that could lead me to Hiro."

You were silently kicking yourself in the rear for not thinking of it before, when you were originally in Kakariko. If Impa had been the Chief 100 years before your existence, and has been since then, then surely she knew of your family.

Link nodded, not pushing further. He'd figured out by now that your past was something you weren't ready to talk about. You both turned the horses around and headed back up the road, basking in a comfortable silence as you traveled towards the village.

———

Impa spoke to Link first.

You were allowed to stay in the room this time, as Link had told her you were traveling partners. It was interesting to watch from the sidelines as the two spoke of Link's missions— the Divine Beasts, Ganon, regaining his memories.

It all seemed so overwhelming to you, and yet Link stood firm. Ready to give his life again for a country he didn't even remember. You admired him for it.

It made your own mission seem smaller in comparison, so when Impa sent Link out to run errands for her for you to speak alone, you felt like a bug. Just waiting to be squashed under scrutiny. But that insecurity faded quickly as the door shut behind Link and Impa regarded you with a warm, familiar smile.

"It's been quite a long time, hasn't it?"

Relief flooded your system. She remembered you.  "Yeah." You let out a breathy laugh, "It has. I, uh, actually have some questions. About that night."

"It seems as if trauma does not discriminate with repressed memories, does it? Whether it be an abduction or a hundred-year-old injury."

Pressing your lips together, you agreed once more. You struggled to make the words come out of your mouth. Too many questions floated through your head, and you couldn't choose which to ask first. As if sensing your unease, Impa spoke again.

"I'm assuming you'd like to know what happened."

You nodded. "It's been so long. Even if I did remember it all, it would be fuzzy."

"You were eleven whenever the Yiga attacked Kakariko. Your brother was eight, and your sister was only two." Impa started from the beginning, her eyes continuously assessing your reaction. "They came in the middle of the night, and lit the town ablaze. The people of Kakariko evacuated and met up at the mouth of the mountain, where the entrance to the town is, and did a headcount. Your entire family was nowhere to be found."

"What happened to my parents?" You were aware of the implications, and figured they had moved on from such a traumatic event in their life. Perhaps they had moved to another village to escape.

Impa averted her eyes, which confirmed the worst for you. "We found their bodies, but we could not find you three. We thought that perhaps the flames burned so hot that you all were gone without a trace, but soon after, a few Sheikah soldiers went undercover at the Yiga hideout for intel. Calamity Ganon is close to being back, so the Yiga have been more active.

We found files pertaining you— they had been watching for years. Waiting for a moment to strike. We wanted to get you out, but the Yiga had you all so heavily guarded. It was nearly impossible. One day, however, another mission went undercover and couldn't find you. That's when we heard of the escape. I figured it was only a matter of time until one of you came home."

You didn't speak for a moment, letting it all sink in. They were actively trying to find you. "Why us? We were just kids."

"100 years ago, before Calamity Ganon's return, your great grandfather was the top researcher of Sheikah technology. He worked alongside the King of Hyrule, Princess Zelda, and myself to prepare for the battle ahead." Impa smiled fondly, as if she was remembering the good times with your ancestor. "For some reason, the Guardians just listened to him. They activated at his touch while dead to everyone else. They were finicky things— still dangerous, even back then. And yet they'd listen to everything your great grandfather did.

The same went for your grandmother, and then your mother. My guess is that the Yiga believed one of you possessed the same gift of controlling such uncontrollable energy that our ancient technology contained. They wanted you on their side, so they could easily control it whenever the time came."

Reeling. That was the only word to describe your mental state.

You'd spent years— captive and free— wondering why. Why such things happened to you, how you played into these little plans that the Goddesses gave you. It almost felt comforting, though, when there was doubt. An idea that the Yiga grabbed you for no reason, or had the wrong people.

"How did you recognize me? It's been eight years."

"You're the mirror image of your father, dear." Impa gestured to the right of her, to a picture on the wall. You cautiously walked towards it, nervous to see whatever the frame held, yet fear was soon replaced with an entire flurry of emotions. 

Happiness, nostalgia. Grief. 

It was a family of five-- your family. You held Kimi against your hip, smiling a toothy, child-like grin as the baby version of your sister sucked her thumb. Hiro sported his signature pout, the picture taken while he was in the middle of rolling his eyes. Very typical. 

What stuck out the most, however, was your parents. Their eyes were shining so brightly, and their smiles matched. Your mom was looking at you and your siblings with absolute adoration. Your father looked at her in the exact same way. 

Your heart ached.  

They loved you so much. They probably gave their lives protecting you, Hiro, and Kimi until the very end. 

"This was taken only days before the incident." Impa explained, "It hangs as a memorial, but I want you to take it. Keep it as your own memorial now, in remembrance of not only your family, but also for your journey." 

"My family isn't entirely gone. I  found Kimi, just not Hiro." 

Impa sighed. "I cannot help you there, but he is out there. An old lady knows it all." There was a twinkle in her eye as she winked. "Another thing. Rely on Link more. He speaks highly of you." 

"He does? I haven't done anything, though--"

"100 years ago, Link was regarded as the Silent Knight." Impa all but interrupted you, presumably to keep you away from the route of self-doubt. "He never spoke to anyone. It took the Princess ages to even get a sentence out of him. I know not if it has to do with him simply forgetting who he used to be, or your presence, but he is open. Talkative. Relaxed. I saw him smile for the first time during our talk today, and it was when he was telling a story about you. Link is opening up to you, and it would help your journey so much if you did the same." 

You looked back at the picture frame on the wall. At first, you felt so much despair thinking about the family you'd lost. You hadn't even thought about what you gained. 

Your family in Gerudo-- Romah, Olu, Ashai, even the newest Chief had made your acquaintance during your stay. Impa. Link. 

People were there to support you, even if they weren't your family. They were found, not given, and chose you. Going out of their way to love you. 

And as you took the picture out of the frame and folded it into your pocket, thanking Impa for her time, you smiled. A real, genuine smile. The first one in a very long time. 

"And don't forget to pull your collar up on the back of your neck!" 

[aihoshiino]

What are some aspects you dislike (or decisions which you feel are weak) in Oshi No Ko? And what hopes do you have for the future of the series?

Disclaimer before I get into this that obviously I am deep in the paint for Oshi no Ko or I would not be here LOL but chewing on stories I like and engaging in critique is how I have the most fun! I've also talked about this stuff before to varying degrees in other metas enough that it would be redundant to mention every time it's the case, so please bear with me if you see me repeating myself.

These also aren't, like, in any kind of order necessarily unless I specifically mention so, it's just whatever order they came to me as I was typing.

That said, this first one is the manga's biggest problem imo and it's simply that it's super unbalanced, at least past the prologue arc. The story initially presents itself as being about Aqua and Ruby as co-protagonists who are both equally important to the story's ideas and themes. This results in that nice pingponging rhythm you get up to about chapter 30 where the story switches focus between them at pretty natural feeling intervals, even if they aren't necessarily really rippling out and impacting each other. Things are still weighted more towards Aqua given that he's the POV character for the most part and we spend the most time in his head but tbh given the comparative dramatic intensity of his goal Vs Ruby's, I think that's fine. Once we move into Tokyo Blade, though, the balance irrevocably tips in Aqua's favour and Ruby basically becomes a guest star in her own story. Even as black hoshigan Ruby. That whole arc in hindsight really just ended up feeling like filler to pass time until The Real Protagonist could come back. It results in this feeling of not really knowing Ruby well or making her seem like an underbaked character because we have such little direct insight into her thoughts and feelings in comparison to Aqua or even Kana and Akane.

Spinning off from that point, the way Ruby is treated in the series more specifically is a huge issue. Up until the start of the Tokyo Blade arc, Ruby was actually one of my favourite characters and I think she was a really great contrasting point to Aqua in the story's themes. While Aqua drags people along through manipulation, Ruby's genuine kindness, enthusiasm and love makes her a bit of a guiding star for everyone else in her orbit. She isn't necessarily the deepest or most complex character at that point but like... I don't think she needed to be? Sort of similar to Memcho, I think Ruby in that first stretch of the story has a really fantastic "flat" arc in that while she herself goes through minimal development, the strength of her character inspires positive changes in the people around her. That's great!

It also just unfortunately completely falls off during Tokyo Blade. She vanishes during this arc more or less completely and even though B-Komachi are the focus of the following arc and we get time with black hoshigan Ruby... that's it! Black hoshigan Ruby gets literally one entire arc to herself to shine and do anything meaningful to the story (the Mainstay arc) and even though she's supposedly even more in the revenge sauce than Aqua at this point... she doesn't do anything! Her scheming literally does not impact the revenge plot at all! It's fucking AKANE who finally uncovers the father's identity and passes this info to Aqua and literally nothing Ruby does contributes at all to the scheme before Aqua gets back into the driver's seat.

And I'm gonna be honest: I really hate how Ruby has been handled since the mutual past life reveal! I hate that an arc that was setting up to be about Ruby untangling her long held maternal trauma got thrown aside in favour of incest bait and I absolutely despise the way the story since then retconned and diminished the importance of Ruby's connection to her mother in favour of framing Gorou/Aqua as her sole important person. This is made ten times worse by the fact that the only insight we've gotten into any of her feelings about this change is her going "omg Sensei squee" in a way that is clearly comedically exaggerated. In general, the story feels like it has a really major lack of respect for Ruby's feelings unless they can be voyeuristically oogled at and mined for sympathy points. This shit sucks!! Justice for Ruby!!!!

Ruby isn't the only character who, imo, suffers this issue of revolving around Aqua to the detriment of her own arc. I've talked in a lengthy post before about my issues with the way Akane has been written post LoveNow and while I am not going to reiterate everything in that massive post (this one has already taken so long oh god forgive me anon) it does give me an opportunity to segue into one of the other major issues with the story, which is its weird reluctance to commit to the effects of big status quo changes.

In Akane's case, this is visible both in way her suicide attempt is just completely swept under the rug and never addressed again without any focus whatsoever on Akane's healing process and the total absence of the persistent online negativity we were promised even in places it should be extremely relevant. The one time Akane ever talks about this is like 50+ chapters later where she vaguely goes "oh, you know how it went with Love Now" in a tone of someone recalling an embarrassing flub and not a harassment campaign so persistent and vitriolic that she almost took her own life.

In general, the story has a bad habit of dropping any hanging plot threads when it moves into a new arc as opposed to tying them off or letting them naturally evolve as time goes by. This results in a story where major upheavals to the status quo and character relationships are *shown* to happen but ultimately do not result in that many meaningful or observable changes within the story, especially ones that might be inconvenient for where the plot is supposed to go. This valuing of convenience over writing that is verisimilitudinous (i'm so fucking sorry) to the previously established characterization and world combined with this tendency of abandoning lingering plot threads rather than resolving them is, imo, why the movie arc feels so weird and all over the place. BUT this post is long enough and wtfever is going on with the movie arc is worthy of its own ramble at some point so I'll cut myself off here.

As for my hopes, I really want us to loop back around to having Ruby address her lingering trauma over Sarina's illness and abandonment. That felt like an arc that was sooooooo long in the making for Ruby and having it just swept off the table is really frustrating. Other than that, I don't have any really big hopes for the future other than just hoping everyone's arcs tie off nicely.

In particular, I hope Aqua's arc has some good resolution... my son has gone through it and I do really just want him to have some happiness at the end of the day. Please let my boy smile, Akasaka!!!

[blood-injections]

Once in a while I’ll hyperfixate on my own aus and I’m like god this would be SO FUCKING GOOD IF I COULD JUST WRITE IT and I’ll sit back down and crank out a chapter if I’m lucky and then lose all ability I have to write and not touch it again for like two months so the specific one I’d love to post right now except when I do write it it’s. It’s not in order. I started in the middle and I now have like the two beginning chapters and I have a bunch of random scenes idk where they’d be yet and I have the end and there’s like maybe ten chapters but like the amount of the au they cover is so small the finished fic would have to be like fifty chapters at this rate. And each chapter is at least 3k words and so it’s like. I have the main shit figured out but it’s so hard coming up with the filler stuff so so it’s just a big block of very holey cheese and I want to post it but I can’t because I don’t have the beginning and I don’t want this specific one to be fucked up and out of order with funky flashbacks or the future as a start or whatever and then it goes back and tells the story like those are cool but this one I’m doing normal but ohh my god else wise I’d post it right now I’m obsessed with it. It’s that venom sib pornodroid au I posted about forever ago where it’s Pois and Kobra in the place of red and blue in the comics and poisons battery is dying so Kobra has to go and try to get a new one but they deny it because poisons an outdated model so Kobra shoots the dracs and just steals a battery and so they were already coming to recycle poison but now Kobra’s also wanted so they run away to the desert where yes they can still functuon they just like get cut off from the bat city internet system or whatever and they have to run off plus instead of like just plugging in like droids can in the city. But they always wanted to be killjoys were just too scared to risk it all try and escape and preferred to wait for destroya to come save them instead. But now they have no choice but they wanted ti be killjoys anyway so it works out and they get to the desert and choose their killjoy names and are exposed to like the culture and the freedom and all the different ways to say fuck you to BLi and learn that you can change more than just your name and poison embraces genderfluidity and kobra was a female model pornodroid but realizes he’s trans so fucking transgender pornodroid hell yeah. Also he figures out he’s a aroace and he really hates his past so he tries to forget about it and a couple months into life in the desert they meet Jet and ghoul because ghoul got shot like an idiot and jets stitching him up in the diner that was the first shelter they spotted and Kobra and poison come back from a concert or rave and find them there and they hang out a bit and become friends and then a crew and after a few months when poison has totally fallen in love with ghoul but lowkey hat themself because they know they’re not human and can never be and that ghoul would hate them if they knew their secret(Pois and Kobra are hiding that they’re androids. They’re so troubled lmao) and that ghoul could never love them bc they’re not human and they also don’t want to be used or seen as what he was seen as in the city which was a tool and a product not a person. So they’re terrified and so is Kobra but poison gets shot one day a few months into being a crew and tries to hide it but his systems are trying to shut off because they register the injury and he wants to get back to the diner to fix themself but of course ghoul notices that he’s hiding pain and he’s like are you hurt and poison holds out until they get to the diner but then ghoul grabs their wrist and is like I KNOW you’re hurt let us help you let me help you and poison tries to convince him he’s fine and he makes knowing he contact with Kobra who defends him but sounds like an asshole bc he’s like leave them be when they’re obviously not fine and ghoul won’t let him go but poisons blacking out and crying and his systems shut off right there in the foyuer and everyone freaks the fuck out

and Kobra has to take over the situation and fix poisons damage and when they come back online everyone’s like silent and staring at them and they’re fine and they’re like yeah I’m. Im a droid. And Kobra’s like we both are because if they’re going down they’re going down together. But of course ghoul and Jet are amazing and don’t care they’re the same killjoys they’ve come to call their crew it doesn’t matter where they came from they have feelings and shit just like everyone else. And its all okay and ghouls still freaked out because surprise surprise he’s also like madly in love with poison and is now torn becuase of this so when poison rests some more he goes and chainsmokes on the roof and thinks over but finds he really doesn’t care what poisons made of and when poison wakes up and goes up there just to stargaze he instead finds ghoul and they have a nice long talk and poison tells him about their past and reveals that they’re not just a droid but a pornodroid and they just bond and shit and it’s all okay and ghouls like you don’t need to worry I’ll gladly watch the sun rise with you forever becuase they’ve been out on the roof talking all night and poisons like sounds romantic and ghouls like is that alright and poison like blushes and is like of course and the finally kiss like two days later.

And all is well actually everything is great for a few more months until they get in a fight with Korse and he’s like oh look who it is our escaped pornodroids and he talks shit at them like they’re not people and also Kobra hasn’t told anyone he’s trans he’s happy just presenting and not revealing those personal things about himself and his past so only poison knows he was a female pronodroid and while poison has been in love and doing great he’s been still hating himself and his body and his past and he’s totes autistic and is always overwhelmed and shit and every once in a while when he feels himself reaching a limit he takes time to himself to go blow off steam and scream into the desert in the middle of nowhere and shoot stuff or go to a concert or whatever and just empty that overfilling bucket. And when Korse comes he’s already been stressed but then Korse taunts him and calls him terrible shit and he’s like trembling in place as he’s like do your little friends there know what you are? That you’re a product of BLi? A droid? A bitch? And he’s like barely restraining himself but then Korse says something in reference to poison and how they’re an outdated model and would’ve been melted down if the two of them hadn’t malfunctioned and he basically says like a slur as he says that stuff and Kobra sees RED and fucking GOES FERAL AND ATTACKS HIM. And Korse can’t even fucking do anything his gun gets knocked aside and Kobra’s living up to his name and striking like a a fucking viper and absolutely beating Korses face in until he’s like unrecognizable. He’s not even aware of this, it’s a meltdown, he just went into a trance and doesn’t brave out of it until poison like grabs him and he realizes he’s shaking like a leaf and sobbing and he gets pulled away from Korse and they leave and leave him to die because he’s basically on the verge of death(they should’ve shot him though because he does in fact survive) and Kobra is like exhausted now becuase of this meltdown and all his secrets being exposed at once and he rests when they get back to the diner while poison freaks out and stays by his side all night becuase they’ve never seen Kobra like that and didn’t know he was struggling but they should have and once again morning comes and they have a nice long talk and Kobra agrees to be more open with everyone and everything’s fine again and like within a couple weeks he and Jet have formed a queerplatonic relationship and he’s doing better and it’s basically happily ever after but that’s not the end no there like a few year time skip. And poison was already an outdated model when they escaped the city and Kobra was a newer model but now they’re both like ancient in android terms and the desert has taken its toll on their mechanics and their batteries aren’t holding as much power anymore just like when poisons battery died before they escaped the city. Poison starts deteriorating first, limbs becoming stiff and achy, rust in their veins. They know their systems are messed up and there’s not really anything they can do and theyre fucking terrified and once again they hide their problems, they don’t show that they’re aging. But then the glitches start happening and they’re harder to hide and after a while Kobra finally corners him and is like tell me what is going on. I know you’re not okay. And poison breaks down and says his systems are failing again and Kobra with like a haunted expression is like I know it’s happening to me too. But his state isn’t nearly as bad as poison is yet. And like poisons protective of Kobra because he’s their younger brother but Kobra’s even more protective of poison because he already had to watch them nearly die the first time around when their battery was dying and an androids battery dying is akin to a human starving to death but being physically unable to eat or take in any nutrients whatsoever. So he almost lost poison once and he’s not about to do it again, he’s super fucking protective of them and he’s like we need to tell the others and poisons like but I’m scared how do we even fix this,

we’re androids we’re not meant to last for more than a few years and Kobra’s like I don’t know I really don’t trust me I’m scared too but we need to tell them because they’ll figure it out soon anyway and they deserve to know either way and you’re already getting pretty bad and sooner or later so will I. So they sit down their respective partner and tell them and theirs a lot of tears and they all search for tech or upgrades and solutions but can’t find anything good enough and all of a sudden poisons getting real bad real quick, glitching all the time and battery running out faster, and they’re basically about to die again and Kobra feels kind of like he’s failed them and the four of them realize the only way they’re going to save poison and Kobra is if they go to the city. So they do. They sneak in, find the labs, the plan is to steal the tech they need, new parts, new battery’s, whatever they can carry. But a lot of the new stuff isn’t compatible with the older models, not without precious time being lost with the personalizations that would need to be done to the tech to make it compatible, time they don’t have with poisons condition worsening by the day and Kobra also slowing down considerably.

And then an alarm goes off and Jet and ghoul fight off the oncoming dracs while Kobra’s helping poison and he sees all the new models laid out and empty, not programmed quite yet. And he has an idea. Jet and ghoul fight off the first wave of dracs and come back in like we need to get out of here but Kobra explains his idea and they’re like fuck wrought because they can’t leave to make it work. So they all barricade themselves in the lab while Kobra hooks poison into the like machines there to essentially transplant their programming and consciousness into the shell of the brand new android models laying around, because that’s something possible and easier than retrofitting a ton of tech. More dangerous since they have to be in the heart of bat city to do it, but worth it. And while poison in those new body is charging and rebooting Kobra’s up next because he walked Jet and ghoul though the process and now he’s getting his consciousness transferred to a new body too(they make sure it’s a male model this time around :3) and it takes like and hour for them each to reboot with like all systems ready so Jet and ghoul are on their own, doors barricaded, waiting for their best friends to wake up.

But they do, and they fight their way out. They all earn a few injuries but they survive, barely escaping and getting out of the city. But they do, they escape, they get home, and Kobra and Poison are in brand new vessels, they look different but not that much, androids are all pretty similar looking, and you can alter your own appearance somewhat. Kobra’s finally in the body he always wanted so he’s great, and both models are brand new and super advanced so they’re still not really superhuman, but these bodies will definitely hold up a lot longer to the elements, and they don’t have to run off plus, Their batteries last longer and there’s different ways of getting energy, like from eating, where food they ingest is converted into biofuel and they can run off it. Physically they’re more inhuman but simultaneously also more human than ever before. And that’s the definitive happy ending.

[recurring-polynya]

I'm sorry if this comes off weird, but I wanted to ask why you seem to not want to know about Can't Fear Your Own World? Do you dislike it, or it's nature as a post-series work?

So I've read a couple of the light novels and they simply do not spark joy. The plots sort of wander around, the characterization has very little to say, and they are full of what I'll call "lore dumps", where there will be a paragraph of exposition that's not integrated into the story in any sort of natural way and is frequently of the "thanks, I hate it" variety. Even though they may be "Kubo approved", or include stuff that he came up with, they completely lack his storytelling skill or the charm of his character voices. There are usually about 3-5 bits that I find charming per light novel, and about five to ten times as many that I find aggravating or off-putting (or just plain tedious or boring).

I think that a big part of it for me is that I read a lot of fanfiction and while there is an awful lot of mediocre fanfic, I have also read a lot of brilliant stories written by people who have given a ton of thought to the characters and the worldbuilding and out-of-canon adventures that these characters might go on. To me, the light novels I have read feel like finding a story on AO3 that has all my favorite tags and a cool story description, and then it turns out that I absolutely hate the writing style and direction. It feels like adding insult to injury that on top of that, I am somehow obligated to consider them canon.

To address CFYOW specifically, it does not contain any of the characters I care about. I mean, I like Shuuhei, but what I like about Shuuhei is his relationship with Izuru, Momo, and Renji. I like his job at the Seireitei Communication. I like his guitar playing and boring cooking and the goofy outfits he wears in splash pages. I could not care less about him getting bankai. I've said this before, but I would like relatively very few characters to get bankai, and he is not on my shortlist. It feels very shoehorned to me.

The plot sounds convoluted and tedious as hell. I already found the Fullbringers tedious enough when I had to read about them in the manga, I do not want to spend one more minute of my life thinking about Fullbringers.

Tokinada seems mildly interesting, but I'm pretty sure I got as much as I care to know about him from reading thru some BBS screenshots.

I hate literally every piece of Soul King-related lore I have heard come out of CFYOW. It makes me literally enjoy Bleach less.

I read a fan translation of the first couple of chapters when they came out and it barely kept my attention. I briefly considered that maybe the professional translation might be a little more readable (I say this with all love and respect for the translation I read, which was trying to keep it very close to the original), but then I have heard that Viz butchered the translation, so I feel like there's no winning there.

It's just not for me. If it were a fanfiction, I would look at the tags and description and simply keep scrolling. I wish peace and love on planet Earth to everyone who enjoyed it and any of the other light novels, but it's not something I wish to spend my time and energy on. There are so many parts and pieces of Bleach--the manga, the anime, the movies, the filler arcs, the novels, databooks, random facts Kubo spills in interviews, fanworks, etc, and I've always been of the opinion that as fans, we all have the right to pick and choose which ones we want to consume and what we want to include in our own personal canons. Further, because CFYOW is post-canon, it literally affects nothing if I ignore it. Yeah, there are a few interesting crumbs in there, like the stuff about Ikkaku and his sister and I think there's an off-hand mention of the Six Hearts gang going to the beach, but it's simply not worth it to me to read through over a thousand pages of something that I am otherwise just not interested in.

[elavoria]

20 Questions for Writers

Tagged by @sylvienerevarine and @dirty-bosmer, thank you!

I tag @1helios1, @sheirukitriesfandom, and whoever wants to join. :3

Putting these under the cut~

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

10, and about half aren’t up to my current standards but I’m leaving them up for posterity.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

71,030, which does not remotely reflect how much I write. I wasn’t particularly inclined to answer these given the AO3 bias to the questions but then I was tagged twice so here we are.

I’m sitting on just about 401k words of unpublished fic. : )

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Dragon Age [all games], Pathfinder [mostly Wrath of the Righteous], and TES [Skyrim and Morrowind with a bit of Oblivion] are the biggest ones, but also Shadowrun, Mass Effect, Cyberpunk 2077, Fallout 4, Game of Thrones, Divinity: Original Sin II… if I get hooked into a story there is liable to be fic it seems.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I’m only giving you two—From Dreams to Deliverance [non-canon Nerevarine/Dagoth Ur] at 100, and The Adventures of Polyshep [post-canon Shep/Garrus/Tali OT3 + others having mostly fluffy fun] at 55.

5. Do you respond to comments?

Absolutely! And if we’re talking privately I WILL talk your ear off in response to any comments you make.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don’t go in for angsty endings but my Nerevarine’s fic will probably have a less happy / joyful / triumphant ending than the others, and my V’s ending will likewise be bittersweet.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmm… hard to say. Perhaps a tossup between the Dragon Age fic and the Pathfinder fic… Ama and Isanna both get everything they ever wanted and more.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No, but it wouldn’t surprise me if Ama’s AU fics get hate in the future for mage/templar shipping…

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, generally things that are descriptive but not terribly explicit, and most sexual intimacy is a bit glossed over. I find I tend to write at least one descriptive sex scene per pairing and then gloss over the other instances—partly because it isn’t necessary to the story, partly because writing sex scenes takes so much more effort for me and I have no interest in coming up with endless variations on that theme.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I’ve written exactly one very whack crossover and have no intention of doing that again—Skyrim/Drowtales.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I’d be honored if someone asked to translate something of mine.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

I co-wrote a bit of unpublished Skyrim fic with spouse long enough ago that neither of us would be proud of it anymore, with each of us taking different POV chapters for our vampires that were going through the Dawnguard questline together. More recently I’ve been borrowing one of his WotR ladies for my Pathfinder fic and having him supply her dialogue if that counts. Amusingly, both instances of our characters interacting in this way involve his judging mine for their romantic interests lol.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Hmm… I get so deeply attached to most of the ships I write. I will cheat and say Ama/everyone I ship her with. ; p

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

At this point I doubt my TES fics will ever get finished, but it would be nice if they did… Rya’s story was too grand for my capabilities at the time, and Rendrasa’s I simply lost motivation on and with her playthrough finished, well… hm.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and characterization. Dialogue is my beloved and I’ve been told repeatedly that I capture canon characters well. Also romance, soft and tender things...

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Too many filler words and phrases that get repetitive… but I like them. So.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

If it fits and is understandable, sure. I sprinkled some German into my Shadowrun fic, but it was mostly pet names and I translated everything in the notes. As a reader I don’t want to be left with questions as to what was said, or have to look things up separately.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Good gods, probably H*rry P*tter ages and ages ago, before junior high, if I’m being honest, and not much of it. Not remotely interested in that fandom anymore. Then a tiny bit of Les Mis fic not too long after that. Terrible but at least some of the Les Mis concepts are… highly amusing, shall we say. Mermaid AU??? Younger self, what on earth…

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

My Dragon Age longfic-in-progress, Knight’s Star. I love Ama sooo so so much and I think her extended conversation with Samson is one of the best things I have ever written. The Pathfinder fic is shaping up to be a close second though. Learning many things about myself with that one hehe such as how desperately I want a gnome boyfriend.

[ciaossu-imagines]

Hello, hello, my lovely constant readers! Just popping in to check requests and messages, hoping to reply to the latter soon this week. I've finished the commission I had, and have been working on some writing that I've been putting off and am having a ball with it. By the end of February, you'll see the start of The Ever Young and will have new chapters of the delinquent! Shouhei story on here, and I'll be posting my first self-indulgent little stories on AO3, which I'll probably also share on here. I've also been giving myself reading and watching time, which was sorely needed. For anyone interested, I've finally completed my full KHR reread, which for me includes the manga, all the Secret Bullet translations I could find (and summaries of what happened in the ones I couldn't find translated) and watching the filler arcs of the anime! I've started a K rewatch and am searching for the spin-off manga because my manga app took them off, along with light novels I know were done for that! I'm also doing a Servamp reread/catchup on so by the time I come back, I'll have all those done, yay!

Just wanted to leave a message saying that I absolutely love all the requests that have come in. I have noticed a couple trends in them though that I want to comment on before I kind of go back to my readings and writings while on my break. I've noticed quite a few people worried about sending in more than one request or asking if that was okay.

PLEASE DO! I will never, ever be upset by people sending in multiple requests during a day, even if they're for the same character. The more requests I get, the more I have to write up and put out for you guys! This is a request blog, which largely means that if you want to see something written, be it for a character or a fandom, you need to request for that! (Though I admit I might use some of the prompts to write things I have in my head for some fandoms that don't get requested!)

On top of that, I've had people worry they're being too self-indulgent in their asks. Please go all out! Requests are, by their nature, very self-indulgent and I encourage that full-heartedly! You're not offending me or making me upset, I do not hate any requests that come in (I love seeing them honestly), and some of the requests really make me very excited to write them!

[furryprovocateur]

had a remarkably miserable time with this chapter. honestly, moreso in the casual run than the ranked one (mostly by trial-and-error). things to note

matthew stole the lockpick from the thief. completely tangential but did you know that if the enemy thief uses the lockpick on the door and THEN you steal it from them, their AI breaks and they just stand there and block the door and do nothing? and this prevents you from getting the silver axe and mend? 😃

bartre got a stupidly good level up (strength skill speed and (i think) luck). he's in this weird position of being extremely useful early on for the plethora of knights and soldiers, but then he becomes bottom tier useful when you start getting flooded by sword users. i was extremely tempted to swap him for lowen, but i was consistently getting that very good level up for him, and bartre is a unit i plan to use long-term, compared to lowen, who i will almost certainly bench within the next 1-3 chapters.

i fielded erk this chapter because he's level 1 and thus would get a stupidly large amount of experience if he was able to pick off weakened enemies, which wasn't terribly hard to do considering guy was mostly 3HKOing the fighters that come in from the northwest. it worked out fairly well, might use erk next chapter too just to get him some experience. the more i can get early on, the better. sure, i have a buffer of 2500 right now, but, as i've mentioned multiple times, i'm gonna need it once i hit lategame.

rapier's almost broken (4 uses) and wolf beil's not much better (9 uses). thankfully, eliwood is tanky enough to have an alterior function + he got a decent level up this chapter so he's doing all right now. if nothing else, hitting level 10 means i can bench him any time i deem him too shitty to keep using. right now though, he's actually helping. hoping i can get him and hector another support rank soon.

seriously, i hate talons alight. i don't mind filler chapters in FE games, they basically have to exist, but good god this one doesn't even try to give like a semblance of plot relevance. also, sealen is just a huge cunt to deal with. at least he gave a dracoshield because it's hard mode.

[soil-just-needs-water-to-be]

Word counts : 1328

No warning for this really

Also I’m sorry this is so bad , I just needed a filler and wanted a small snippet and G and Hann then some sibling love , so this is just really random

BUT HOPEFULLY THERES ONE MORE CHAPTER LEFT THEN THE BOYS WILL BE TOGETHER I KNOW THATS WHAT EVERYONE HAS BEEN WAITING FOR

"When can I come see you?", We'd come off of the call a few hours ago as my dad had come home, we'd kept in contact all day though because I didn't want to leave him. I know he's been sat with his mum and brother since and he seems to be doing alright. He told me they all made dinner together and that he'd actually eaten something which is also really good.

Matty: Darlin, you can come whenever you'd like, when do your holidays start ?

I'm currently sat basically hanging out of my window with a joint in my hands, feeling like I just want to hold him. I've been thinking about it since he told me earlier and the more I think about it the more I just need to be there. I've given myself a headache thinking about it which is quite funny really. The joint is helping calm my nerves a little

George : I'm sure they start next week but you've got exams for the next month, I don't want to distract you?

I hate the feelings that I'm having right now, I've never really been a clingy person. When I'm with people I know then maybe I am , but just maybe. With Matty everything is different I don't quite understand what that means. I was never this clingy with Laura and we dated for so long. It makes my head swim, why is this so different to everything I've ever experienced before. Maybe this is what other people feel when there in love, you know how they describe it in this corny romance movies. This is maybe how Adam feel with Carly. I should ask him.

I pull up Adam's contact and press the call button waiting fidgeting with my lighter while I wait for him to pick up

Adam: Hiya G , you alright ?

George: Alright Hann, yeh I'm alright, I just really need to talk to you about something

Adam:  What's up G?

George : I need to ask you something but promise you won't take the piss okay?

Adam: When do I ever?

George: Never, but like I'd understand if you did with what I'm about to ask you

Adam: Just ask me G

George: Alright fine , you know before you got with Carlz how did you feel , like how did you know you liked her.

Adam: I don't know , I just liked her didn't I , like she was just always around and she made me happy I suppose

George: Did you ever feel like you wanted to be with her like all the time and just like I don't know , like feel emotional when she was upset or something even though wasn't your place too.

Adam: G I love you bro but I really don't know what your getting at, what are you trying to ask me?

George: Arghhh fuck

I wrack my hands through my hair and my nails scrape against my skull as I lightly pull on my roots like I'm trying to pull my thoughts from my brain

George: I'm just trying to understand what's going on in my head, I really really like Matty and I feel like I'm being so clingy and annoying and too much but ....I don't know if it's because I'm overthinking it because I like him or if it's because I just wish I could help him.

Adam: Why is being clingy a bad thing , and why is wanting to help him a bad thing?

George : I just don't want to be too much Ad !

Adam: Has the lad said your being too much ? Cuz if he hasn't then I'm sure everything is fine

George: No he hasn't said anything about being annoyed at me or anything but ....that doesn't mean he isn't , I just really like him ..... and like what if I get to much and when he's upset or something and it messes things up.

Adam: G, please trust me on this , I'm sure your doing an amazing job, okay!?

George: I'm trying to trust you, my heads just all over the place right now Hann, that's all

Adam: Give yourself a break man !,

George : I'll really try , but uh yeh I'm just gunna go now I've got stuff to do and gotta look after Gracey and Lucie , Thanks man , I know I'm being difficult but thank you!!

Adam: It's alright G , love ya man

“Geor !!!!!” Little Gracie came barging into my room just as I was finishing the call with Adam “there’s a spider in the bathroom Geo, fix it !!!”, I then say a quick goodbye to Adam again before hanging up and pick Gracey up holding her on my waist “there’s a Spider , is there ?”

“Yeh it’s so big, it’s like this big”, she indicates the size by stretching her arms out.

“Wow that is gigantic ay?” , I can just see her nodding with her little blonde ringlets bouncing. And she’s clinging to me as we make our way to the bathroom. “Can you show me where it is Gracey?”

“No no no , I don’t want to see it again, it’s just in there”, I let Gracey climb down from me as she stands at the bathroom door pointing at where she saw the creature “right there Geo”

After finding the perpetrator and setting it free outside obviously because you can’t kill it , no matter how scared you are of the things you can’t kill them according to little Gracey “it’s just mean to kill them” , even though she didn’t want to see it skittering around she had to check the tissue in my hand for evidence that I “hadn’t crushed it with my tree trunk hands”

Lucie had joined us at this point coming to see what all the commotion was about “what are you guys up too” , stood at the front door, homework in hand , looking like the proper little Miss that she is. “Is that a Spider ?”

“Yeah, Gracey was scared so I’m just setting it free”

“Why are you scared of it Gracey , it’s just an insect , even though your just little you’re bigger than it is so you would be more scary to it then you are if it?”

“When did you get so smart ay, your both so grown up , when did that happen”

“I’m 7 George , I’m a big girl now , but Gracey is only 5 she’s not a grown up yet”, Lucie is genuinely so grown up and would literally do everything by herself if she could , so grown up , short brown hair that used to be likely Graceys blonde ringlets. Blue eyes which is weird because we all have brown eyes. Shes even quite tall for her age, nearly tallest in her class. She’s so independent, knows so much about everything and anything. Where as Gracey just a little bundle of clingy and joyous giggles ; she looks up to me big time not the blow my own whistle but she wants to be just like me. There both so damn intelligent though.

“That’s very true Luce , let’s get back inside yeh , Gracey you can watch TV and I’m going to help Luce with her homework okay?”

“Oki Geo”

“George I don’t need help, it’s just reading”

I hurdle them back inside after closing the door, I set up CBeebies up on the TV for Gracey and pull Lucie up in my lap as we sit down, she does thrash around a little trying to get me off her but she settles “I know it’s just reading Luce, but I want to see how good you can read it can you do that for me?”

“You know I can George”

[brightbeautifulthings]

A ​Sky Beyond the Storm by Sabaa Tahir

"But sometimes, there is no reason. Sometimes you kill and you hate killing but you are a soldier through and through so you keep killing. Your friends die. Your lovers die. And what you have at the end of your life is not the surety that you did it for some grand reason, but the hard knowledge that something was taken from you and you also gave it away. And you know you will carry that weight with you always. For it is a regret that only death can relieve."

Year Read: 2023

Rating: 4/5

About: There are spoilers ahead for the rest of the series. Laia and Helene have allied against the dual threat of the Nightbringer and the Commandant, now self-proclaimed Empress of the Empire. As the Soul Catcher, Elias is forbidden to get involved in human conflicts, but when the Nightbringer's magic threatens the Waiting Place and all the souls who cross over there, he'll be forced to confront the human life he left behind to save the world as they know it. Trigger warnings: character death (on-page, graphic), war, genocide, fire/explosions, severe injury, violence, blood/gore, trauma.

Thoughts: This series has been all over the place for me. I adored the first book and slogged through the next two, which had too much filler and too little plot, but A ​Sky Beyond the Storm came back strong for me. Maybe it was that I took a year's break between them, but I found myself happy to be in this world with these characters again. Despite its size, the pace didn't often lag, and I found myself moving through it quickly. While I've come through a full realization since beginning this series (and others) that fantasy isn't my genre, and dystopian even less so, I enjoyed this one overall. (I also feel like readers could easily just... stop with the first book and be fine, so do with that what you will.)

My feelings about characters and plot elements remained pretty consistent. Laia is a strong character with plenty of development, but I disliked Elias as the Soul Catcher from the beginning, and it put a serious damper on my enthusiasm about their relationship. There's just so much unnecessary pining for characters we know are going to end up together (or dead, given Tahir doesn't have any qualms about hacking off major characters in this series). His chapters slowed things down for me, and they seemed to move things forward the least. Helene is still my favorite, and she has possibly the strongest arc of the series.

I'll admit I wasn't super invested in the stakes of this book. The plot gets a bit unwieldy, and the effect that the Marvel Cinematic Universe has on contemporary storytelling overall is really clear here. Not every story needs world-ending stakes to be interesting or effective, and I enjoyed the characters' smaller struggles more than this one. There's also the fact that I've just never found the Nightbringer compelling as a villain, and every attempt to redeem him or give him depth had me rolling my eyes. But, whatever. I'm a jaded old lady, well outside the target audience for these novels. There’s a strong theme about generational horrors and the way that more violence only perpetuates them that reminds me a lot of Laini Taylor’s books, and I suspect fans of those would enjoy these. If I'm ever going to revisit this series, it won’t be for the themes or world-building, but for the characters.

[f4iry-bell]

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐄 | 4

pairing: jameson hawthorne x nerd/goodgirl!reader.

summary: who would have guessed taking an unwanted picture of her could lead to that tense moment? more than that, who would have thought it would get his attention to make a deal? and guys like him drain a person inside out when are interested in you.

series taglist: @clarissaweasley-10 @whatsamongus @sheisntyou @emelia07 @elysianwayy77 @lyra-kane @bewitchingkisses @zenikswaffleshop @off-to-the-r4ces @jamcarven

permanent taglist: @clarissaweasley-10 @whatsamongus @sheisntyou @emelia07 @elysianwayy77

warning: a bit of angst

word count: 934??

a/n: sort of a filler chapter. kinda mark their spot. that's all

← part 3 | masterlist | series masterlist

Her mind was running the phrase ‘what the hell just happened’ repeatedly as she went back to her dorm. Jameson usually drops her off or walks her to her dorm which she appreciated but this time, he just stood there for her to leave. It is very unlikely for him to just walk back all by herself since he loved annoying her at any given moment. Maybe he wouldn't have let her walk all by herself if they were off campus, he wouldn't, right?

She thought Jameson was just struck by shock of the sudden close proximity in the library, and would have gotten over it by now. I mean, how many girls has he been that close with? It is not new for him. But it was not like they were sharing an intimate moment. So, why the hell is he ghosting her completely? She couldn't find him in any of the classes they shared together, or in the campus. She finally decided to text him three days after the incident.

— Are we doing something today?

She sent it without overthinking, nothing happened. Why is he ghosting her? She thought maybe she DID do something. Maybe it was the question, she was so stupid. But she also wanted to stop fretting over this because all of this worries over a boy who can't say what he actually means?

She let the text be, not bothering whether or not he replied. I guess that is the tale of her and Jameson. A tale of nothingness, and stupidity, maybe some adrenaline. But just as she thought it's over, she got a text from him.

— Meet me.

— Where? 

— You know where.

She hated herself for knowing where he meant, she has talked about it with him quite a few times. It's sort of their place, well kind of. Although they've only been there once, it was an unforgettable experience for her. 

He was already waiting for her, sitting there on the cement railing looking over the view. Once he noticed her presence behind him he held out his hand for her to come, and sit with him. She reluctantly took his hand, and sat. Both of them ignored the chills that went up when their hands touched.

There was a minute of silence before Jameson broke it. “So, since you were so into the games last time. I thought I would bring you Hawthorne Chess. And given your history as a chess nerd you probably have friends who are chess nerds.”

She blinked in utter confusion.

“You know? People who play chess like it's their pleasure?”

She blinked again. “Sorry?”

“Hawthorne Chess requires eight people. But of course for you to play it, you have to complete a mini quest”

She scoffed. She forced herself to not hold onto his shoulder while she threw her legs back to stand on the road, she dusted her back, and started to walk.

“Wait, wait! What the hell?” Jameson gently grabbed her arms.

Which she jerked away from. “I should be asking that!”

“You're mad?”

“No, Jameson. I'm on cloud 9. Why don't you join me?”

“I don't understand—”

“You ghosted me for three days after dismissing me like I'm beneath you, and should just follow whatever you say.”

“It wasn't like that, come on.”

“Oh, yeah?!” Her eyes widened. “Well it was for me. And now I thought you'd apologise or something but then you're going on about some stupid quest, and game?”

Jameson stood there quietly and let her just yell at him, he knows he deserves it.

“You just can't take things seriously, can you?” She added. “You know, you've helped me enough. Enough of the games, heights, everything. Enough of you. Thank you , and goodbye.”

His silence broke. “It was my way of apologising.”

“It sucks. And is not a proper apology if you're marking me do quest before I can play your stupid game.”

“I- Look, I'm sorry. Is that enough? Is that what you wanted to hear?”

“No. I want you to be sorry. Not just say it.”

“I am! Or I wouldn't have made a quest of my own.” He explained.

She sighed. “Okay. But still my decision is made. Our deal is done.”

“No, no, no. We still have a lot to do.”

“I think I have enough content to write about. I'm serious, I'm not just saying because I'm mad.”

“But…”

“But what? Why do you still want to do it? Why don't you just go back to your friends and leave this stupid nerd alone.”

“You're not a stupid nerd, Y/n. Nerds aren't stupid.” he joked 

She rolled her eyes. “Just leave me.”

“I like your company. You are scared of heights but you are ready to dive into the sky. You are exciting, and I like your excitement. It” he started the last sentence but stopped.

“You can jump from buildings with your friends.”

“But they are not you.” He took a step forward.

“What does that mean?”

“Means you're special. To me.”

She stared into his eyes, he meant it. His eyes don't lie like his mouth does. “And?”

“And I want to spend more time with you.”

“Answer me this.”

“Anything, princess.”

“Why did you just dismiss me that day?”

“I didn't have an answer to your question that day.” His lying mouth spoke words his eyes didn't. 

But she didn't mention that, maybe she did it because she wants to keep hanging out with him. Like he said, she is exciting and so is he. She doesn't want to end that feeling. Maybe he will tell her a different story about that day, the truth even.

part 5 →