#it's all kicking off from here on out
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"...Hello? Ma! I told you not to call me today, I'm making a movie!" -Wario, Mario Power Tennis
The most important lesson from Ma that Wario took to heart was the endless pursuit of cold, hard cash. Unfortunately, the one lesson she could never teach him was the importance of hard work to get it. It wasn't for lack of trying; Wario's Ma is the hardest worker this side of the Mushroom Kingdom. Raising Baby Wario was a herculean enough task on its own, but ever the enterprising spirit, she had also set out to grow one of the most profitable crops: garlic.
Her backyard business quickly expanded into a veritable garlic empire. Wario's mother toiled away tirelessly each day from sunrise to sunset to grow and harvest as much garlic as she could possibly achieve. Much of Wario's current strength and endurance can be attributed to helping his mom on the farm as a child, although the teeth-pulling task of getting him to actually work was almost as difficult as preventing him from eating all the garlic straight out of the ground. Wario's nose for instant gratification has always been a thorn in his mother's side, but try as she might to instill a solid work ethic into the boy, her "get-rich-slow" schemes could never appeal to him. Still, Wario enjoyed his surprisingly agrarian upbringing. Along with garlic, his mother also raised chickens for eggs, inspiring in Wario a lifelong soft spot for poultry. (He also had a pet hamster named Fluffy, who sadly passed away in 1986.)
Today, Wario is still on good terms with his mother despite their physical distance, and frequent phone calls keep her updated on all of Wario's business successes. Of course, being Wario, he heavily embellishes the amount of work he actually does at his company. If she only knew...
#wario#mario oc#(technically...?)#something I couldn't gracefully fit into my spiel is that she is also where he gets his affinity for country music from.#also my timeline here is that wario spent his early childhood on this farm in the mushroom kingdom (where he met mario) and moved to#diamond city as a teen (where he met jimmy t‚ was taught how to drive by dribble and spitz‚ etc)#idk why they move though i havent figured that out yet. But they go back to the mushroom kingdom area at some point#wario‚ now all grown up‚ kicks off all his sml and wario land shenaniganery after several failed attempts to yoink mario's castle#and later goes back to diamond city while wario's mom continues to thrive on her garlic empire#and thus warioware is born. You know the rest#art#moms n dads#wario's mother
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For the au ask game!
OKAY I wanted specifically to get to the pokemon au from the ask you sent, it's been cooking a bit so it's time to see what comes out of the oven, so... @azol-otl ty for the ask!
Crossover au's are all about the fused worldbuilding for me and speculating on how characters from universe A would fit into universe B heehee hoohoo - and for Batfam especially it's fun to think about the equivalent of their roles as vigilantes! What kind of people have the same level of celebrity, the same sideways seeking of justice?
Naturally this leads you to the gym leaders because a) it's the most fun and b) they are like. Quasi-law enforcement/educators/professional athletes depending on how you try to translate the innate child's perspective on the pokemon universe into something that makes sense as an adult lol ilu pokemon. [insert 'compels me though' gif here]
SO with this in mind, here's 5 fun facts (that are mostly backstory lmao) from a jaytim pokemon au I would write
I'm deeply ill about pokemon so this one goes under the cut lol:
Jason Todd used to be the Champion. He won the role after Dick Grayson quit a year or two before (Dick had been getting older and chafing under the League rules - meaning he'd been chafing under how Bruce ran the League) and was a fierce competitor who didn't believe in going easy on anyone. His Houndoom was a force to be reckoned with, and despite running a mostly Dark-type team, his Honchkrow cleaned up anyone thinking their Fighting-types could sweep. He looked after the League and Gotham with a cocky, self-assured attitude and the win record to back it up. .
Jason disappeared suddenly at the age of 15. Many assumed him dead, after a Rocket (Or whatever Gotham themed gang name we want to go with lol could be Team Joker) bombing in the area he'd last been seen, but he's officially declared missing. Bruce Wayne took back the duties of interim Champion as he once did for Dick Grayson, but he's not quite the mentor he once was. It's obvious he's grieving, and that he doesn't want to mentor any more twelve year olds. Dick signed up to be a Gym Leader shortly after this, returning from his trip about a year early to help out in the chaos following Jason's disappearance. .
Enter Tim Drake. Tim's gym challenge wasn't all that interesting in the circuit at first; he had a rocky start and had to retake a few gym challenges. He wasn't exactly sweeping on his first try every time like Jason had done. He didn't have the meteoric rise that caught the Champion's attention early, didn't get one-on-one mentorship or face-to-face meetings, cautionary advice and congratulations all rolled into one from Bruce Wayne himself - but Tim had patience and grit, and he paid attention. He was gunning for the Championship, and it wasn't just so he could prove himself. Team Rocket/Joker was still out there, and Bruce needed all the help he could get. He was always better for Gotham when he had a Robin. .
Dick had been nicknamed Robin for his all-Flying-type team and especially his Natu-then-Xatu; Jason followed up with his Murkrow-then-Honchkrow; Tim's Rookidee was one among many (Robin-esque pokemon were popularized by Dick and the trend remains through Tim's day) so he wasn't considered a possible Robin successor until it was a Corvisquire and he was about to face Dick Grayson himself, a badge away from Victory Road. By then, Tim and his team were a well-oiled machine (he runs mostly Steel-types lol but also Normal-types for the unexpected adaptability and the 'underestimate my rattata i dare you it's in the top peRCENTAGE--' of it all. FEAR.), and his loss-record had all but frozen while his win-record ticked higher and higher. .
Shit finally goes down about three years after Tim has become Champion and all but bullied Bruce into mentoring him (he basically said 'if you don't watch me, i'll go find Team Rocket/Joker on my own' and triggers all of Bruce's child endangerment traumas simultaneously) and the mysterious Rocket/Joker leader Red Hood shows up, bringing the gang out of the shadows in pursuit of a hidden agenda. Identity shenanigans and "wait is that a Houndoom? But he's only been using Ghost-types, it CAN'T be..." and heel-face turns abound. .
(BONUS FACT: Something something, Jason went into deep cover with Looker or whoever he is, that Interpol guy from X & Y (WAIT. LOOKER MIGHT ACTUALLY BE TALIA AL GHUL IN THIS AU HOHOHO), infiltrating the Rocket/Joker gang and going public as Red Hood is the first step in the last phase of the sting. Cue a million tense Jaytim interactions in which Tim is legitimately trying to take Red Hood down and Jason desperately tries to shake him so that he doesn't do anything that forces Jason to blow his cover. There is at least one 'tugged into a tight space to hide them both from the actual bad guys, "wait, did you just HELP me...?" "Think whatever you want, babybird"' interaction because I am a slut for the first sprinkles of a redemption arc that is rife with UST fufufu)
#did i make this pokemon au actually an undercover spy action movie? yes. yes i did#also their full team comp i will leave to the imagination haha#everyone has their preferences for what's appropriate so i'll name a general typing preference and leave it there mostly#but I will defend Dick 'the Flying' Grayson(s) forever. all flying types for him change my mind#I like the idea of city-boy through and through street kid Jason having a stereotypical inner city team at first#but his team changes and expands as his pokemon journey really kicks off#i always think of that one short from the start of Pokemon 2000 with the inner city tire castle that pikachu finds#and the houndour that FUCKS IT UP LOL#so to me houndour is like. okay it's one of my favorite pokemon (COULD YOU TELL *glances at my banner) but it's a def an urban pokemon to m#so i like the idea of scrappy street kid Jason finding a houndour 🥺 and that was his first pokemon 🥺#so he kinda falls into dark-types in part because of the stigma around them being difficult to raise and him calling BS#and then of course he switches to ghost-types after he 'dies' in part to separate his identity as Red Hood from Jason Todd#but also for the joke of it all lmao look the dead boy uses ghost pokemon. who also have a stigma for being creepy/unlovable. i cry forever#Tim's team i am the most *shrug* about but i do think he has either a competitive team or a meme team lol#but for him i do like the aesthetics of steel- electric- normal- because Tim is the robin with secretly unhinged normal boy swag#he's out here doing the math and making you underestimate him look at his big tanky aggron lol so slow and then BAM#pikachu with light orb and x6 agility x6 double team u can't touch that rat electro ball to the face#Does his wigglytuff know thunderpunch? ice punch? fire punch? good luck guessing he switches its move set after every battle mfer#OKAY ANYWAY#ty azol for the ask!! i love pokemon i have many brainworms owo#edit: had to fix the formatting a bit to make this READABLE. God help me if it sucks to look at RIP#jaytim#not fic#my writing#ask game#asked and answered#pokemon#dc
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I have finally emptied the blue bench of all the library books I need to hand back, even though they were terribly photogenic in there, and instead have filled it with all the old children's books I've been keeping around for like fifteen years or more, even though the chances of me ever having children or even passing them on to nieces/nephews/cousins etc is vanishingly small. These are less photogenic but at least it's one way to start clearing the living room of boxes.
Currently strategising how to fit them all in but also wow this is a list of Problematic Children's Authors TM
#I mean#They're all dead and they were probably considered Problematic long before I read them as a kid and I turned out sort of ok-ish#But honestly not a great look and very much proponents of a particular early to mid twentieth century upper class moral system#On the other hand#I do fully believe that the PTSD-addled disaster teenager in a Sopwith Camel that is James Bigglesworth is appropriate reading for kids#The shelf goes 'Snotty boarding school stories; saccharine animal stories; now let's introduce the children to the concept of WW1#Shellshock and alcoholism time for the little ones; on the other hand the racist elements in quite a few of them are going to need reviewin#Not sure the 1970s approach- which was essentially to revere the same authors but delete the racist and sexist language- actually worked#Because it took out the worst words but it didn't actually do anything about the fundamental attitudes of the books#Maybe we should have asked WHY we revere a certain type of children's literature from a certain (colonial; stiff upper-lip; heroic) era#Rather than simply deleting a word here and there and repackaging them as essentially ok for the next generation#Eh#As I say I turned out fine and I think if handled properly it can teach children how to read critically#But if in some miraculous turn of events there ever Real Children in this house that shelf is going to need diversifying#I just can't seem to bring myself to throw them out yet; I know I'm not likely to ever have children so not sure why I keep them really#But I used to think I'd have them for my own kids and that's a hard idea to let go of#And not something I'm willing to unpack right now#On the other hand 'The Adventures of Robin Hood' has to stay even though the spine is falling off#It has been a favourite of two generations because we all love Robin Hood and also Marion is allowed to be kick-ass for thirty seconds#And that tiny scene got me through half my childhood#Earth and stone
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if anyone is waiting for anything from me (be it an ooc response in IMs or some sort of beginning to an interaction), please know i'm not ignoring you or not disinterested! (ꈍ ‸ ꈍ✿)
i was sick all week last week and now we're diving headfirst into the holidays, so i've been a bit scatterbrained with remembering to reply to things — i guarantee it's me, not you ♡
ty for your patience; i'm stoked to explore dynamics together!
#˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ 《 ooc 》#i promise you i'm The Person who will read an IM and then think to myself “i'll reply to this in a sec!”#literally forget a second later#and then just forget the IM is there because there's no notification in my face anymore#that being said tho! i know i've had a few ooc discussions with some of you recently#about starting interactions that haven't kicked off the ground yet!#i PROMISE i'm HERE for those interactions and excited!#you have not been forgotten and we WILL do fun things together <3#i appreciate everyone being patient in the meantime#also with the pjo show coming out tomorrow that's about to become my entire personality again#comfort content let's go u.u/#so i'll prolly be doing a lot more blog-hopping and giving my boy leo some extra love but!#none of that takes away from my eternal obsession with this man#and all of the dynamics i've discussed so far + any to look forward to in the future >w> stay tuned~
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Thinking about finally throwing all my FF7 meta analysis and lore deep dive stuff onto a sideblog. It'd be reblogged from here, but I'd be able to organize it a little better, have a directory so people could find things more easily, and maybe it'd stop people from regurgitating things I say word-for-word for brownie points when they can just find and reblog the fucking original post(s).
#fandom vent#this happens WAY more often than I talk about#like constantly#not daily#but if I put up a ramble#there will always be 2-3 people on the twits or here#who immediately start saying the same thing#in the same words#acting like they're the ones that did the analysis#and it's really frustrating#y'all know I actually do research on this shit?#I check my sources#I review the source material#I get alternate translations to be sure#I read real-life research journals for scientific stuff#I research dates and real-world events and natural phenomena and religious history etc etc etc#it's not just 'nashi writes 2k words of bullshit and hits POST'#I do actual research for my analyses and my deep dives#I cite my sources whenever possible#I don't LINK all the time because that can kick a post from the tags#but I don't just make shit up#so people grabbing it and running with it as if they were the ones that did the work to figure it out#is super disheartening#my current big research project is figuring out if Reeve's surname#is actually rooted in Gaelic#because it's such a weird name#and it's possible that it's not spelled right#because it may be Gaelic#this is a theory that has not panned out yet#but I've been researching it on and off for weeks
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Man, really hoping I can get some good sleep these upcoming nights
I've been struggling a lot with sleep lately and its killing me Dx
#molly vents#i haven't really been talking to people either because of it#i've got like 0 social energy#and christmas eve is soon#my mom's hosting this year so people are coming here#so you know if i was to exhausted for it i wouldn't really be able to skip out on it#(i mean i could by staying in my room but then sensory pain would be a huge problem)#(but also its christmas eve its like the one family gathering i actually look forward to)#i also think me playing so much sl*me rancher hasn't been helping#i've been so happy and excited about the recent update#but its also kicked off my obsession towards it again#so i've been playing it EXCESSIVELY#i can tell my brain (and hands) need a break but its hard actually staying away from it#tho i have completed all the new stuff so at this point its simply back to the grind#i'll tire of that quickly#as much as i enjoy it it does get boring quickly sometimes rip#like sure i wanna do some new files but i would be a lot slower at it#but then... the wiggly wonderland event in the first game will be starting tomorrow#i've never done that so of course i wanna go at it#bluh
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#i just got home from work except its not good cus my parents arrived here first and planning to stay in my house for some reason..........#are they planning something or what#im so pissed off#its not ok this house is supposed to be safe space for me#i didnt spend all my life saving just for they to come and disrupt it without even asking#i mean i could kick them out but im also asian so you know how it is#its weirdly wired on us to obey parents for some reason#...#i just wanna draw gay men kissing....
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what i wouldnt give to know tokis relationship with cats the musical
#metalocalypse#if i were to project id say he learned about it from the movie first and then found his way to the original but thats just me hkfbhlfh#i feel like it could be a 50/50 chance on whether hed like it or hate it#like the gang finance a broadway revival for his birthday and at first hes like “oh this isnt actual real cats? fuck this”#but then he warms up to it#hkbccbjf theres so many possibilities here i could do an actual episode with it plus the b plot that ends in all the actors massacred of co#he likes rum tum tugger for a minute until skwisgaar goes “thats me lol” and then hes livid#i think hed like the jellicle ball bit. the cat party and victorias parts#murderface starts jacking off and they kick him out thdlbfcnvsg#dethklok#toki wartooth#skwisgaar skwigelf#william murderface#god the fucking. hovercraft gag but with literally any characters name#the ground is so soft and good for digging#skrimbleshanks? shingleskanks? shranklefucks? donglecunts? shizdlecrunks?#throw some more slurs in there and you got it
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im gonna be real 4 a second hes kinda gorgeous in a prettygirl way
#when he does not look like he is seconds from popping every single bloodvessel in his body LMFAO#my rambles#just saying i Could fix him#i could hang w him we could kick it im just being real here#Cos he is actually kinda chill when he’s not pissed off#Out of every1 the ppl id be most likely 2 be friends with would probably be him Peter b and noir#everyone else is too cool for me and i dont think theyd like me LMAO#Or i’d be 2 scared to initiate anything#It all depends on parallel play !!! could they do stuff And have me on as background noise#Spot isnt on here because first and foremost he is my wife But friendship is everything So actunally ill put him on the list too
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chewing these until i explode and die
#snap chats#sorry i cant describe things normally im sleepy but anyway#NO they made a tweet showing off all the funeral merch and theres some shit here i didnt see last time#the mine one's a part of. a postcard book ?? i think ??#this the only one that ate from that ... to me anyway....#i just really like how they chose a similar shot of him esp with how drastic the lighting differs and the camera angles#not even MENTIONING how the top scene is. from the orphanage bulldozing LMAOOOO#its art to me in ways i refuse to elaborate on ...... ok but the AOKI ONE THO LEMME GET INTO IT#what the fuck is an acrylic block i dont know but anyway .... theyre foul for the shots they chose <- screaming kicking my feet#it makes me want to make a proper gif set of aoki using those shots now .... and a mine set with Those Shots ...#im just sayin they def had a tumblr girlie on the team ... it just reminds me of gif sets on here ... im stealing their ideas idc#aoki's scene with his head held high at presumably the highest point of his life#to contrast how dreary masato's shot is. Shot Lol Get It on the worst night of his life with his dead drooped kmsing right now#AND WHEN THEY BOTH POINT THEIR GUNS AT THE CAMERA... SCREAMS ...#like the other merch didnt Give like these did ok ... is it my bias No Im Totally Objective.. i want these as gif sets ....#i was gonna put nishitani's here too since they ALMOST did something cool too#they had the top of his being when hes sittin in the grand with his arms spread out#and i THOUGHT the bottom one would be when he's Getting Lit Up and his arms were spread but no ..#its that scene but ... they didnt show off that part ... just him looking back at majima ...#love how they chose the most bbg still of aoki dying for the egg merch meanwhile mine's is just. Rage#they cant go with the same wet cat shot of him tho i get it ... they used it twice for merch fjerLKVAKVJE#anyways im typing way too much about these i gotta go BYE
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now why did sebastian call skid row’s songs gay? is he gay? 🤨
#the quote’s from 2011 and he’s like omg i don’t wanna only play old skid row songs that’s boring and gay#and i get he’s using gay as a synonym for bad (which is y’know lightly homophobic)#but if i can make a baz gay joke out of it i wil tbh he’d be more interesting if he were gay or bi#like how gaylors lose interest in taylor swift songs when she says they’re about men?#anyways#rachel laughing with someone cause they used the f-slur in 2009 him and baz were having a homophobia-off#actually in the same interview baz says something about i don’t wanna be 56 and still resting on youth gone wild#BABE YOU’RE 56 NOW LOOK AT YOU#i guess good for him that he has a new album out but he criticizes the skids for not doing new stuff#even tho three songs from gang’s all here were on their most recent set list#and gang’s actually has some good songs unlike kicking and screaming/give em hell/child within the man
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Forgive me for the person I'll become when Missa releases all his new music <- delusional
#been on a missa kick lately which I've never really shared#been getting reeeeally into some of his music and lowkey getting a crush on him 😳🥰#and like. who cares if its been a month or smth. im still very obsessed with that stream he did where he showed off music he was working on#like his voice is insanely good and im going crazy like. to this day i still dont know if he plans to release all that or if that was just-#-scrapped music. with how excited he was when showing music i dont think its scrapped? but idk#dont wanna get my hopes up but. gah#also im just gonna come right out and say it. missa sinfonia is fucking hot as hell#he's so insanely hot and attractive and the music makes him hotter and he's so funny and grhgrgjfrh#ive been a little bit a lot obsessed lately. oh my god how are you so damn attractive#ive kinda told myself that if i ever get a partner the first thing i would do is show him missa and make them fall for him like i did#he's like. handsome like a guy from my culture. does that make sense#missa sinfonia has malay guy swag#i think i can say that here yeah. ive spoken my mother tongue language here#sorry im reaching he just reminds me of someone irl. but also. missa is hot asf i need someone to shake hands with me#frickin. schoolgirl crush on a funny mexican youtuber#ive watched more missa videos than i thought i would and its embarrassing how giddy i would get watching like#i am in my 20s but i am resting my chin on my hand like 🥰#brother I've fallen someone pull me back up i cant do this today
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starting the year ✨wrong✨
#(this is about work ok. long rant in the tags bc auauauauauauauuauauauauauauauaaaaaaaa)#i’ve worked for just t h r e e (3!!!!) days this year and i think im already all burned out lmao#first i was stuck doing 2 workstations bc this freakin’ b o z o of a coworker decided to take the week off without prior notice#and *t h e n* the internal components of one of said workstations kicked the bucket and was only replaced today. sads.#rip to our wasted time and futile fixing efforts though. flashtag wetried#that’s not all t h o u g h i was told that i have to jump to the other work shift bc one of my coworkers is resigning#b u t the thing is. all of the other dudes in that shift are from [insert bordering country] and always speak in their nation’s language#so i won’t be able to communicate well with them for the most part esp s o bs#and if [insert country here] has a national holiday and a l l of them decide to take the day off..#well. um. ahahahaha. im ✨screwed✨#(but speaking of taking the day off… one of said guys on that shift has an approved leave for cny. which is funny bc he’s not even chinese)#(rips if the actual other chinese dude on that team has his leave request rejected bc of that guy lol. happy cny to him ig)#a n d also i was made to (sorta) teach these two new coworkers (of sorts) the workstation i’m at for the week#b u t the thing is. i do everything here by left (didn’t receive formal training either lmao sadge)#and i also couldn’t explain anything well in general bc it seems like my flow of thoughts can’t streamline itself ig#so i think i confused the poor guys more than anything. but like. why me??????? aaaauauaaaaaaaaaa#idk why one of them came back for more ‘education’ from me thoughhhhh#i’ve tried teaching ‘em stuff at another workstation before this and my feedback was ‘wait slow down you talk too fast’ s o o o o .#ig i’ll have to guide them though again in the morning though. sighs. this wasnt in my job description :(#speaking of job descriptions though… this h e l l a annoying guy no one likes who resigned a few months ago (to much rejoicing)…#is!!!!! coming!!!! back!!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#w h y. like. w h y. why is he so attached to this company he l l o? why is our manager so attached to him helloooooooo????? why him???????#our workloads literally t r i p l e when he’s around bc he’s just the way he is. auauauauauauauauaaaaaaaaaaaa#aaaaaaaaaaa i dont wanna work aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#science industry (derogatory) questionable laboratory conditions (derogatory)#felt cute; thought about retiring early idk
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it really does do something to my brain that Roman was the only one who was physically abused as a kid like to the point where his siblings Noticed, to the point where it's had lasting effects on how he approaches relationships, like it wasn't enough that he was the Second Second son, Logan had to punish him for being "weaker" by virtue of being younger than Kendall, and then when that punishment has an impact Logan has to punish him for the impact too, like "Dad thinks there's something wrong with you" fuckin cycle within the cycle
#roman roy#abuse //#succession#it wrinkles my brain it really does#AND HE'S THE ONLY ONE WE SEE LOGAN HIT IN THE SERIES TOO (aside from Iverson) LIKE BRO#singled out and it makes him worse but he thinks it makes him special#it makes him love his dad all the more#kicked puppy etc etc#the only way he can get off with someone else is by having them punish him and then shield himself from it#he seeks out mencken after logan dies because he can't EXIST without someone Higher Up to toady to#someone to tell him he's doing good#someone he can be the Special Boy for#getting punished by his father to the point where he seeks it out#acts out so people WANT to punish him#roman roy i want to study you so bad#and now the summary for the finale comes out and uh#spoilers here#he's physically bruised? how much was it intentional?#does he see the protest and goad them into attacking him?#does he do it on purpose because there's no one who will do it for him now that logan is gone and gerri's finished with him?#he's seeking out self-destruction because without logan there he's gotta go diy#he's glad for the power yes but is anyone really paying attention if they're not hitting him?#does anyone even care if they're not willing to lay hands on him?#so thrilled its a stat holiday on monday so i can take the whole day to watch and break down over the next ep#roman is going to crumble i can feel it#i stg if they do a mirror in the finale of the time kendall was missing#and roman had to go get him during his drug spiral?#i'm going to cry so hard i'll throw up i promise
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weekend melancholy is starting to kick in >~<
#im gonna go and do my food shop etc to keep myself busy and hopefully my 2nd meds will kick in and we'll be able to handle it together#i think i kind of do this so regularly bc my brain is just processing everything bc i dont rly have time during the week#all cool tho im doing good overall def on the up n i feel way more capable of coping emotionally which is nice. i <3 meds#also.. possibly settling on the idea that i might be agender. very tentatively. lots of experiences n thoughts coming together rn#ive been reacting in unexpected ways to a lot of gendered shit atm which has made me reconsider the way i think abt myself#but very difficult to articulate it to myself let alone anyone else. so ive been sitting with it for now until it precipitates#gender stuff has never rly affected me much or ive never been in a place to explore it which is why i havent thought abt it super hard#but im not the sort of person who needs a lot of internal exploration to figure out my identity like im v self aware tbh#and while im wildly indecisive abt most things in my life for some reason i never have been abt stuff like this. i learned abt lesbianism#like idk 9 years ago-ish and straight away was like yeah that makes sense for me. never looked back since#n similarly ive experienced forms of gender dysphoria before n just immediately dealt with it symptomatically n moved on#its never been smth to agonise abt for me like i know what makes me comfortable in my skin so theres no question abt doing it#and ik im privileged to be able to do that. and also it helps that gender for me is mostly divorced from external perceptions#+ that im v autistic so social pressures dont stick to me very well. i mean yeah i was bullied for it as a kid but i was stubborn asf#so yeah from the moment i realised i was genuinely uncomfortable/upset abt it earlier this week i was like okay. lets try this instead#its given me pretty instant relief from any distress i was feeling so far which is nice. rare respite from one of my torture labyrinths#just testing out internally whether it frames things more clearly n makes me feel more myself/at peace before i choose to stick w the idea#but not gonna do a whole coming out fanfare either way. dont think i wanna change how ppl interact w me + im still a dyke#so i dont consider it relevant to anyone else unless they share a similar understanding of gender to me. or if we're v close#ill prolly broach it w other trans friends eventually bc insert philosophers talking image. but to everyone else its business as usual#happy to play my cis-sona at work. + w new queer ppl i meet ive been introducing myself recently w mirrored pronouns instead of any/all#and i think i prefer that. virtually indistinguishable but theres smth nice abt inviting ppl to recognise me the way they do themselves#like translating + localising a non-gendered language into a gendered one... simplifying decisions abt how to perceive me#and ofc ppl are still gonna perceive me however but idc much unless we're actually friends. the rest is all a performance anyway#doubtful anyone on here ever has reason to refer to me but if u do for some reason... im freeloading off ur pronouns now btw <3#but yeahhh. much 2 think abt. i need to read more alien/ai sci fi.. non-human sentience has been such a comforting concept lately#but yea tldr i woke up one morning this week like damn im prolly agender but i have a full time job to go to rn so idc abt that#.diaries#okkkk my dex is kicking in im no longer on the verge of tears lets go get these groceries wooohoooo
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honestly whatever nat and marián have going on in book two is ten times h*rnier than whatever nat and quinn have going on in book two at the moment and I should probably change that but whatever
#when nat realises he can technically feed from ppl without killing them it opens up some new options for him#but if ur gonna try and do it consensually the best way to up your chances of getting a ''yeah sure go ahead'' is#to maybe hook up w some ppl who have raging vampire kinks#enter marián and millie#the first time they uhhh Hang Out is basically just them getting each other off while Nat bites them and drinks n then#he's just kind of like Ok Cool that was all I'm here for you can kick me out now if u want but they both just#go to town on him lmao#it's what he deserves#idk if I'm gonna actually write it bc uggghhh sexy scenes hard but it's dumb and fun to think about#anyway. sorry for h*rny posting LMAO
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