#it's actually kind of sad 😔
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#meme#memes#shitpost#shitposting#humor#lol#funny#satire#funny memes#irony#dark humor#funny meme#it's actually kind of sad 😔#funny humor#warhammer 40000#40k#elden ring#primarch#sanguinius#godwyn the golden#joke#parody#crossover
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you ever just. become overwhelmed by a sudden out-of-nowhere wave of tenderness and affection and longing for reconnection directed towards someone to whom you no longer speak for Very Good Reasons
#‘out of nowhere’ she says like she hasn’t been doing a lot of reading/thinking recently about various tragic messy breakups#and the later regrets of the parties involved#anyway. tell me not to text her#it’s been over two years since the last time we talked… absolutely no reason to break that streak now. lord give me strength#she was really fucking mean to me! like objectively intentionally unwarrantedly cruel! it ruined an entire year of my life#and fundamentally changed me as a person on a deep level! there’s a lot of things i used to like about myself that i don’t think i’m ever#going to get back#and yet every once in a while we have to do the whole ‘maybe i could make things right’ song and dance 😔#the thing is most of the time i’m not even really angry with her anymore like enough time has passed since all the shit went down that#really i just sort of look at her behavior and feel sad. both because of the impact on me but also because of the ‘that’s really how you#felt you needed to act towards someone who cared about you? you couldn’t have just expressed your feelings in an honest and productive way#instead of just lashing out in the cruelest possible way and ruining the entire relationship beyond hope of repair?’#and i feel bad and sorry that it went that way and honestly i kind of pity her and hope she’s gotten some of her shit worked out#so i’m not like. actively pissed off at her anymore. but also i can’t think about her without thinking about the worst year of my life so 🙃#i don’t actually feel that trying to reopen that door would be very healthy for me at least#we did try a Reconciliation of sorts a couple of months after the initial falling-out and while it was kind of helpful for me in that she#like. apologized lmao. and affirmed that i wasn’t crazy and she did in fact On Purpose say the most hurtful things she possibly could have#said to me given the information she had at her disposal. and that i really had not done anything to her that could warrant that. etc.#it also left a sour enough taste in my mouth that i just don’t see a future where the two of us spending time together is enjoyable for me#and yet… the regret will always live inside me i think. maybe if i were a stronger person…#caseyposting
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I really need to be cleaning my room but. fanfiction I'd write if I had time but I Do Not
There are several ghiralink fic storylines that are along the lines of "Link gets exactly what he thinks he wants and turns out it isn't really what he needs" (whether real or a dream-state) that have him taking Ghirahim's sword and gaining complete control over him and the themes are of personhood and power and complacency. be careful what you wish for type things. A few that are Ghirahim killing Link/Link losing and realizing he would rather have him alive and fighting instead of dead/given up because it was more fun than way, but usually end up being sad. oh well I guess for the former and teaming up with Link to defeat Demise for the latter.
What I want to write is the themes of scenario 1 but role reversed so it's like scenario 2 with Ghirahim having the "this isn't what I wanted" moment. Ghiralink adds, usually as a joke, a level of "if I can't kill you, maybe you could join me ;)" and I want to write more or less Link doing that, Link being a perfect subservient extension that does everything he wants him to and he doesn't regret it (he can't), but Ghirahim having the realization that he doesn't want someone who is nothing more than an object for him to use. A doll. A sword.
And then, how Link has guilt over Fi and the Master Sword and his role as hero and how Hylia controls him but he's no better than her, Ghirahim realizing Link is now what he is to Demise and rethinking his own position. Is this what Demise thinks of me. Is that why he treats me the way he does. And he takes his anger out on Link but Link can't fight back anymore. Link doesn't want to fight back anymore, and not in a depressed it's hopeless kind of way, but in the same way Ghirahim accepted Demise pulling the sword out of his chest.
When Ghirahim is empty and goes isn't this what you wanted, Link can genuinely say no because he has a hero's heart and conscience and never meant for anyone to get hurt. When Link goes I am what you made me, Ghirahim has to face that fact that yes, he is, and he is made in my image, and I do not want this anymore.
#ghiralink#ghirahim#I want skyward sword bad ends but I want them completely different from what is already out there#I want the dark ending from Ghirahim's POV where he got what he wanted and everything is perfect and Link isn't ever an issue anymore#and like honestly. I don't want it to be a sex thing. like yeah that could be part of it but I don't think it would work as well#how I wanted the sword spirit au to go but did not manage to make it work this way 😔#I want Demise to win and Link to live and Ghirahim to know he does but not see him for a few weeks/months. to not even think about him#or feel any guilt that he's probably rotting away in a dungeon or getting tortured or whatever. no even excited about that just apathetic#and entirely focused on Demise (who is in turn pretty apathetic about him but he doesn't even realize) until one day he sees Link and he's#*not* a prisoner. he's just another solider in a demon army or a regular servant or maybe even a bodyguard to Demise. and he speaks with him#and there's no trace of animosity or anger or sadness or anything. there is no war in ba sing se etc.#and then I don't have anymore than that it's just kind of wouldn't that be fucked up huh#for Ghirahim to have absolutely no underlying thoughts of demise actually sucks or foreshadowing he's not the perfect blade he presents as#and all of that to snap when he sees an enemy completely changed. he wanted Link dead. even when he says you could join me#he would expect push back and fights and relapsing into wanting to be the hero. he never considered what if he wasn't an enemy at all
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No guys you don’t get it grrm announcing the dunk n egg show means he’s confident he can write more of those books soon and he’s not going to do that until twow is done wich means he’s close to getting it done and it’s coming out tomorrow. Trust me
#.txt#in my delusion era ❤️#no but fr I am actually kind of hopeful that we will get twow soon#idk maybe it’s just bc I’m still a relatively new fan but#idk he seems optimistic? like he’s actually getting work done#he’s finally solved whatever plot point he was struggling with for so long and now all that’s left is the easy part#I know this for I have seen it in the flames#but seriously what’s the use in being like ‘ohh we’re never getting that book’#you’re just making yourself sad#I don’t think the ‘pretending I don’t care about it so it gets done faster’ strategy is working guys 😭#btw i still haven’t read the sample chapters bc I wanna go in raw. that’s my delusion level#if I do read them you know I’ll have given up hope 😔
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omg omg have i ever talked on here about the time i almost met jack when i was at the fob show in march 2023 bc there hasn't been a day since it happened that i haven't thought about it
#like he was just#in the queue???#i was with someone else who doesn't listen to atl but saw him before i did and only recognised him bc of me posting about atl on ig KJSHFKH#but basically what happened was i saw jack in the queue and then again when i got inside the venue#like i was standing towards the back and he was there with nano + lupe + gamesweplay#(i apologise idk gamesweplay's real name skhfk)#like they were all standing at the back near the bar hanging around#so i made my way to the back and kind of awkwardly hung around sdjfkdjfh#he was there with friends so i didn't wanna like ambush him so i ended up not actually getting to talk to him 😔#and that makes me so sad bc he was RIGHT THERE#i was maybe three metres away from him#and honestly i was just so excited that it happened at the time#and i still am#like ngl when i think about that particular fob show i always think about that dhfskdf#but i'll always be haunted by the fact that i missed my opportunity to talk to him#“what would you do if you saw your fav in public?” turns out i'd just fuckin stand there awkwardly and miss the chance to say hi to them#jack barakat#all time low
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I had a dream last night that I was in the omegaverse and was nesting for my heat and this random alpha tried to push up on me and Bakugou laid his ass out??? and the next day, bc Bakugou was courting me, he gave me his favorite jacket that he wore almost everyday for me to use in my nest and and :(((
#IT WAS SO COMFORTING#and then someone just had to come in my room and wake me -______-#it was so sweet tho#and I’m just now realizing that I actually WAS nesting yesterday during the day??? bc I come on my period this week???#that’s so weird I hadn’t even connected it#so I’m never beating the omega allegations I fear 😔#it was such a cute dream tho#I wanna turn it into a fic LOL#I always wanna turn good dreams into fics#but I already have too many to write on my list so. no fic for now about courting alpha bkg 😔#wait why did I make myself sad ALSJDKDJF#okay gn I’m sleeby and I hope I dream more of my big stronk kind alpha#—in store chit chat! 🍫
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#it's my last shift in 2 days and then i'm leaving this job i'm actually so happy i no longer has to work there! 🎉#i need to find a new one asap of course but i never had energy to do so on my off days so i'll focus on that now#i've endured the hardest shifts with freezing -25-30 °C where the heater conditioner did absolutely nothing#shifts with the roof leaking trying to not let the orders of customers get wet constantly wiping shelves throughout 2 days on top#of everything i has to do#these past 2 days sewage system froze and i had no water to wash my hands or use the restroom properly..🤦♀️#i know the wet hand wipes are bad for ecology but man they continously saved me and also i had to wash my hands using water from kettle and#i had to do it outside freezing of course because the sink and restroom are in another building and i didnt have time to constantly walk#there.. and this on top of 2 last weeks of december being especially batshit crazy stressful and having heated karen encounters each shift.#and it was so hard on me because i am a nonconfrontational person and i don't like arguing with people#but i learned so much in these months of working there and for that experience i am still grateful :")#it's bittersweet that i won't see the friendly regulars that were always kind to me anymore tho 😔 and my coworker came yesterday#and we spoke for like an hour or so and he said he is is sad that i'm leaving because i'm such a nice person and a great coworker 🥺#ngl this made me sad too but life goes on.. he said he'll be leaving in a month too#said he didn't think that i'll leave first 😂#i woke up almost an hour ago from 3 bg3 related dreams in a row btw 😂🤦♀️ i need to play 🙈 ok i need to get up first..😭#tbd
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i’ve been inside my house for a week now aside from a like 10 minute walk last saturday and i think i’m going insane
#was actually kind of sad to see campus was closed again this morning LMAO#i have to wfh 😔#my brain is melting slowly#漫言
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My ability to draw human people is definitely... improving
#i kind of fucked it up colouring she just looks sad now but the sketch was great at least 😔#art#disco elysium#this was taken at a weird angle that's why its a lil squished sorry#anyway everything should be about her actually
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Some vocaloid songs shouldn't be covered because too much is lost from a human singing it and sometimes vocaloid songs shouldn't be covered because every single damn person who tries gets the vocals fundamentally wrong
#rat rambles#this is a joke but also non breath oblige Im so sorry sweety I understand you at least (vocally)#ofc I dont actually care how ppl cover it I just find it funny how so many ppl take such an overly soft approach to it#also Im pissy that I cant find any covers that just fucking scream it by the end gmdjdndkd#honestly. I kind of wish that the sekai cover was actually good cause god I would kill for a good ena solo for it#its not actually that bad buts very eh to me. like yep thats sure a cover#tbf at least they didnt whisper the part™ like a lot of ppl do buttt they still hold back too much for my taste#also sorry but miku drags down the cover a Lot in my opinion#but yeah non breath oblige my beloved one of like 3 pino songs I actually like fjgndjfndh#and one of them is the world hasnt even started yet and Only the wxs version the original just sounds so lonely to me dnfkfbshd#but yeah one of my favorite parts of non breath oblige is how the vocals starts out soft and then insensify over the course of the song#so seeing that in so few covers is saddening 😔#I live in a sad world 😔 (has ideas for cool cover stuff and imediately expects someone to have done it by now)#blows a kiss to rabu ka one day someone will make a version with funky instrumentals and then I can actually listen to you more
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NOOOOOO IM GONNA HAVE TO GO SPEND $30 AT THE WEED STORE AGAIN SOON I HATE EXPENSES OVER $10.................
#ugh so sad that i have no choice but to do it though 😔#LOOK $15 for 50mg of edibles that work is not a bad deal at all in my book and my last purchase was wait hang on HUH#just checked i made it through 80mg in two months UHHHH#i KNOW that's chump change for the average stoner but that is astronomical for my house and 5mg takes me out#i've been high like 25% of nights between the end of august and now??????? apparently??????? actually kind of a slay for me tbh#like one of my friends is still going through edibles she got in CO like a year ago.............. HOW...........#i need to be more economical this is an unnecessary expense. however. in a sense it's not though.#have you ever gotten wizard high and listened to dust bowl by ethel cain? that was me at least twice a week in july#golden age........ lilies....... PD songs that don't make me sob uncontrollably......... such good music and listening high is transcendent#SO excited for the new album btw. ANYWAYS.#tw drugs#idk if people usually trigger tag for shit like my lychee flavored weed gummies but i'll be cautious <3
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I love Taylor. I always have and to some degree I always will. She means too much to me and is such an important figure and source of joy and light in my life when I desperately needed, and a connection to my own father that I need desperately, to deny that I will always look on her fondly to some degree as silly as that may seem sometimes and to some people.
But that doesn't mean I don't/won't/can't be critical of her or be disappointed or disagree with choices she makes or has made, because I absolutely have been and I absolutely am.
My problem is that I always, with every fiber of my being, look for and try to see the best in people and believe in people until I absolutely can't anymore. Unless it's something truly reprehensible and irredeemable, my brain simply cannot comprehend the idea that one bad decision or mistake trust me I know she's made more than one lately can automatically invalidate or negate anything and everything good a person has ever done. I've genuinely tried to understand it and unfortunately, I can't wrap my head around the concept. I give grace to a fault. I get sad when I see things said about her in a negative light even when I completely understand and even agree, because I have so much love for her in my heart. It's that tride and true naive, blind optimism in me I guess.
But I do not in any way think she's a perfect person, I know she isn't, because nobody is. Some are just better at hiding that than others. She makes mistakes, she's wrong sometimes, she is a human being who messes up. Sometimes in big ways. And unfortunately she's messed up a few times over the last year or so and that makes me sad. It disappoints me because I love her so much, and I do want and expect better of her. And in the process of that, it makes me very sad that I feel like I have to hide the facet of myself that does still love her despite my disappointment in her or risk making people upset with me now because I'm so afraid of upsetting people. I'm terrified of doing or saying the wrong things I try so hard to do the best I can every day and it's disappointing to see her slip up. It's sad. It makes me very sad.
It's a complicated time to love her right now. I hope, in my heart of hearts, I sincerely hope that sooner rather than later it won't have to be that way anymore. Not just for me, but for all of us who feel that complexity or conflict of emotions.
#I don't know I'm just talking out my ass I just have a lot of thoughts running through my head I don't really know how to articulate well#I just always want to believe the best in people I don't like to judge people I don't like to condemn people or see that happen#unless someone is truly reprehensible and deserving of condemnation and I just don't feel in my heart that she is like some people do#I don't know maybe that makes me a bad person...? sometimes I feel like there are people who would think that it does and that makes me sad#I know I keep saying I don't know but I truly don't know. I'm just tired. sometimes I wish I didn't care#but the fact of the matter is that I do. I care about people I love people I want nothing but the best for people#I want to believe the best in people and in my heart I believe that she is the person I always thought she was. someone who is good and kin#who makes mistakes but is ultimately better for them because she learns from those mistakes and grows#or maybe I just want to believe she's like me and always looks for the best in people and sees the best in people to a fault#until she can't deny the truth anymore if they're not good people.#sometimes you blind yourself to the things in people or situations that you don't want to see until it's impossible to anymore#I know because I've been there. not in the same kinds of situations granted but I've blinded myself and hurt myself so much to hang on#I've ruined my entire life holding onto the past. not wanting to move on into the stage of my life I'm actually in#and trying to stay in my childhood as long as possible when the truth is it's long gone. i can't get it back.#but I can keep her. I can keep that piece of it. and oh god I want to. I pray to god the truth of her heart is revealed#and that that truth is good. that that truth is a relief and a reassurance to those like me and many others looking for it lately#maybe I'm just being naive I guess. but dammit I want to see light on the other side no matter what. it's a blessing and a curse sometimes.#I just want people to love each other and be kind to one another and coexist with one another peacefully... that's all I want... 😔#I want people to be able to love who and what they love without shame or fear to be who they are unapologetically without shame or fear#I just want love and hope and light in this world goddammit it shouldn't be as hard as it is these days 😔#I love you all. so much. no matter what. never forget that. ❤#abby's insomnia thoughts
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Alright, I’ll bite the bullet and say it: these characters are so incredibly autistic to me and I desperately want more of them. Augustus in particular is twigging a chord in my brain so fucking hard — a fact only exacerbated by the fact that it’s a Bakugan video, given that the middle school self was so painfully obsessed with Bakugan. Augustus’s “This game sucks ass!” comment only furthers the comparison here btw, because the game is incredibly unfun to play, which made it feel doubly infuriating that I wanted more of those toys so fucking bad at that age but everyone bought them for my younger Brothers instead while I was filling up sketchbook after sketchbook with Bakugan character art with the one Altair figure I’d bought myself carried around in my pocket at all times while my peers made fun of it for being a cringy thing their little brothers were into. anyway Im also obsessed with Augustus’s particular autism accent and I want to hear more of it — bring that guy back Pronto
#N posts stuff#don’t feel any reluctance referring to Augustus’ voice like that ftr#the guy playing him Is putting on a Voice but the guy playing him is also autistic. so im fully claiming him#the chosen is a recurring character on the channel but so far as i can tell this was like augustus’s singular solid appearance#SAD. i want to see more of him. please.#my brothers shoved their bakugan into the AC unit 😔 i was so fucking jealous#i have no idea where my altair wound up :( i should see if it’s tucked away in some obscure corner of my mom’s garage somewhere#the two of them fighting for their lives to get the figures back into ball shape is so fucking real though lmao#the dynamic between the two characters also twigs middle school bc i was notorious for being WAY too Much#while also being painfully entranced by flat affected monotone folks; like thought they were So cool and wanted them 2 think i was also cool#FTR i do not say ‘middle school’ as in ‘childish’ but just as in. like. unfortunately the middle school self and the current self are like#in very different positions in ways unrelated to age. so it’s an era thing more than an age group thing TO BE CLEAR#the more i actually like. Remember being younger the more i wonder how much the like flat affected / flattened emotional landscape that#the current self possesses is like Innate to us or if it’s something kind of. Pulled On defensively? i want to recapture the#middle school self so fucking bad. augustus manifestation of where i want us to be going in life. we can accomplish it i think
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personally, i dont see the fundamental difference between deleting your account and making a new one and deleting all your old posts, if we're talking about "running from ones past", then what are you tryna hide there, bud?
#mood#vent#the evidence of your past is gone regardless either way sooooooooooo#how is it so different and how do you keep convincing yourself you're morally superior?#i mean- this is me pretending I agree that that's true to play devils advocate a lil here#bc i know the only reason i deleted any account of mine was bc i just like fresh starts sometimes#and tbh i struggle to find a username i like and some website require me to delete & remake in order to change it#what-- is the problem that you struggle to hold on to me and keep track of me?#bc i promise as soon as i start posting my ocs people Will know who I am regardless of if I recreate-#at least yall and your kiwifarms stalking-ass followers will recognize it and immediately report back to their cult leader#so whats your issue here EXACTLY?#you're already documenting everything I do. so whats your issue?#i mean. is it bc other people wont 'know who I am' and what YOU think i'm like? even though other people- strangers-#already dont know who I am?#bc if thats your argument- I could say the same for you! how are people supposed to 'know who you are' when you delete all your posts?#there was only 1 time I actually deleted my acct out of fear of how ppl would treat me- and it was bc I was dating you!#you made me feel like I had to be Perfect. so quite frankly#blame yourself you bum#what can I say- ig i learned how to cover my tracks from you.#bc before you- I probably would have left it up even with all the bs happening at the time#and now I regret deleting it bc the only reason I did was to impress you with how Good I Am. 🤮#be honest- the reason you're upset is bc you cant use what was on that blog against me#even though what was on that blog PALES in comparison to the kind of shit you've done and posted.#ok ignoring you now and focusing on me again- there was so much art on that blog thats just lost forever and it makes me sad.#even any problematic things. I woulda wanted to keep it if only to keep an archive of my growth as an artist#plus there was a gif of hoody dancing to the thrill by wiz khalifa (i think that was the song I made the gif to) that i'll never get back 😔#i honestly have an issue with deleting my art in general- stuff that isnt problematic so dont start w me bitch- but- for some reason#I just used to get these urges to delete shit like out of shame. I think its bc of being trans and trying to stuff that down and feeling#ashamed that I even wanted to be the guy I wanted to be so I would just get rid of it all and .-.#theres a lil chunk of my comic art that's just gone forever and i wish ik everything I drew. at least I remember one of the ocs i deleted
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Discussing the upsetting theory for the last episode in tags, because I’ve got nothing intelligent to say about it, it just makes me sad
#I know it would be kind of stupid and a little unfair to all the other work that goes in the show#but I think if Izzy actually really dies in this last episode#I’m not sure if I’ll be able to continue 😭#(assuming it gets renewed again)#because regardless of how well it’s done#I think a lot of my spark will be gone 😔#like and tbh I’m normally very fine with character death#but idk something about this would actually break my heart#maybe it’s the fact that I started watching the show and getting attached to this character#when I was truly not doing well At All#like I had just failed multiple classes#and wasn’t medicated and was dealing with a lot of shit#and in general#I got the spark back for making art and having unabashed fun again#so this would really be a hit sadly 😔#idk it’s not that I’m totally emotionally dependent on this outcome#it’s just that it would actually just make me sad#and that’s fine it’s really fine#but idk I’d hate to have this be the ending for a character that brought me so much joy and in many ways a lot of community
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RIP Ricky September they had to kill you because it would have been unrealistic to not keep you on as a companion 😔
EDIT: I've noticed some people taking this post really seriously, so to clarify: no, I don't think Ricky was literally a perfect uwu anti-racist angel. This post was mostly a joke about how he was running around doing companion shit and, most of all, how the Doctor and Ruby both thought he was a hottie. My actual feelings about Ricky are that he's a complacent white liberal. Character reading under the cut if you want an explanation.
I do think the implications of making him unplugged from the racism bubble, paralleling him with the Doctor (man who shows up with knowledge about history and technology and guides the other character through dangerous situations), and directly contrasting to Lindy (including being open to trust the Doctor without second guessing him the same way Lindy and all her friends did) are supposed to be that he wasn't like the other people there and is thus LESS racist since racism comes to be what defines their society. I've seen some people basically ask "then why'd he move to White People City?" but within the text it's actually Rich People City; the reason everyone there is white is because systemic racism financially benefits white people. Making him LESS racist is NECESSARY to giving his death any meaning - because if he definitively would have called the Doctor a slur and walked away, then the Dot killing him quickly was a mercy kill because we KNOW all the other residents are going to die in the wilderness.
THAT SAID, I also don't think he was a progressive anti-racist. Do you know what Ricky actually is? A white liberal. He might disengage from the White People Bubble, he might not be outwardly cruel to black people, but he's still surrounded by people who are and benefits from a system where ONLY WHITE PEOPLE ARE RICH. The culture might be fucked, but he still benefits from it without doing anything to actually fight it. It's like how many a white liberal will read about the history of slavery, feel sad about it, and then be uncritical of prison labor. If Ricky was meant to be progressive, there'd be something, ANYTHING in the text about how he's tried to educate his followers on their society's problems, but it got deleted. He is COMPLACENT.
That's sort of the point, I'd say, since the theme is about how priviledged white people put themselves in a bubble of people like them and choose to look away from what's wrong in society. Those people become complacent at best with no effort to actually speak out or change things. Hell, even within the text, Ricky SEES a problem others are looking away from (the slugs eating people), but only tries to fight it by making a TikTok about it and becomes complacent again, accepting that people are just going to be eaten.
So tl;dr: no, I don't think the white liberal kid literally would have been a companion. I think if you stuck him in the Ood episode, for example, he'd have shaken his head when he found out about their plight, maybe made a TikTok with sad music playing over footage of them, and then said "welp, nothing else can be done." I think it's FUNNY to imagine another companion that the Doctor and Ruby both are giggling like schoolgirls over.
Also I kind of thought he was ugly - no offense to the actor but the makeup they had him in combined with the lighting and closeups made him look way older than 27 so he gave off this uncanny "how do you do fellow kids?" look.
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