#it's a very tough life right now balancing work

[dontmeanyoudontmissit]

Wait. Today is Friday and there is Eras Tour tonight!!!

[yandere-sins]

I don't know if you write something like this, but what about reader being Hades lover instead of Persephone like it's supposed to be? I imagine reader is some normal human on our world learning about Greeks Gods but suddenly got isekai'd into the Mythology haha. Imagine the confusion and flabbergasted reader felt by all of this.

Reader try to find a way back to human world but ended up in the forest where all of this started. Trying to avoid Persephone fate of being Hades's lover that eating the underworld food, but of course, Hades wants the reader to eat the food. After all Hades got all the time and reader is starving.

I would love the tension, back and forth of Hades temptation and reader insistent. Thanks!

Okay but what if I take your idea, and I give it a tiny plot twist? Make it just a little bit more horrifying? Okay, okay hear me out, look...

»»———————— ♡ ————————««

Being a human had never been so frustrating.

It was one thing to manage the daily challenges of adulthood, of living on your own and taking care of yourself. Things got tough, and they got fun again; sunrises made you smile, and losing a beloved restaurant to a global issue made your heart somber. For the longest time, you believed having a shitty day at work and then having to go home in the rain because you forgot your umbrella was the worst your life would ever get.

But you were wrong. Very wrong.

Because where there was no life, that's where things became messed up.

"One bite," he pleaded. With the pomegranate juices running down his spindly fingers, the red was almost disturbingly blood-like against the faded color of his skin. "Please. I know you are so hungry."

Pouting your lips, you shook your head, turning and marching onwards through the dark forest of lush yet colorless greenery. It was just a park, Hades had explained, but every time you thought you'd break through the thicket, it expanded further, endlessly like a maze of trees and bushes.

You two had kept up this dance of rejection and chase for a while now, days to be exact. And you were unsure if he knew, but you were hanging on to the last threads of sanity. You felt your knees buckle with resistance every time you rejected yet another offer of fresh food and sweet nectar, your stomach screaming in aghast horror as you kept denying freshly picked fruits and beautifully arranged plates that could sate your hunger. And your head had become so dizzy from the stress and anxiety that you began feeling as if your life was being drained right out of you to feed this place instead.  

The Underworld. Resting place of souls.

Occasionally, you had heard about occult stuff like fairy rings or portals to another world. You never thought that accidentally falling into a river would end with you being transported right into the realm of the afterlife! You had cursed at your feet for being so clumsy and easily losing their balance, but at this point, you had no strength left other than to be thankful they still carried you around. You weren't dead yet, but you didn't think you were very much alive either.

"I need to find a way out..." you mumbled to yourself, your mouth feeling dry and your head buzzing with incoherent thoughts. Only determination had gotten you up after passing out so many times. Only knowing you came here somehow, so you must have been able to get back somehow, kept you going. Things were tough, but you were tougher, right?

"There is none," the god of the Underworld mumbled, a tinge of regret breaking through his voice. "You've been here too long. There is no way back from here."

You breathed out, coming to a halt, as did his ghostly appearance behind you. It was colder in his proximity, yet he stayed close as if to comfort you. His body was cloaked in black swivels, yet his face was almost too handsome to look at directly. His hands were visibly gnarly like those of skeletons, yet you knew his touch was soft and his palms big and reliable, able to catch you before you hit your head on the floor from fainting. His hair fell in waves of ebony beauty, and his crown was so intricately woven into it that it made him look humble and whimsical rather than fearsome and ruthless like the stories made him out to be.

There was nothing about him to hate or make you truly distrustful of him. Yet, you still wished he would leave you, just like in the beginning, when he could only stay for a limited time to watch you struggle before returning to his duties. But his time by your side had gradually increased, and perhaps that was the feeling of dread you've been experiencing for a while now.

"Don't you have anywhere else to be?" you asked, too exhausted to sound snarky.

"I cannot leave you like this. It's not your time yet."

"Then let me go! Lead me out of here!"

In a spurt of a moment, you regained enough strength to spin around, yelling at him angrily. You regretted raising your voice as you looked into the flash of hurt crossing his features before the beautiful grimace turned serious again.

"I can't," he said firmly, holding out the pomegranate again. Its fragrance enticed your nose, saliva collecting in your mouth as it promised to be an especially juicy one. "There is nowhere I could lead you but back to the palace. But you wouldn't make the journey unless you eat and drink. You're just human, after all."

It must have been easy for a god to point out your biggest flaw of them all: you were just human.

"Can I go home if I go back to the palace?" you asked, eyeing the pomegranate with disdain even though your teeth demanded to sink into its flesh, chew apart the seeds, and satiate your hunger.

"No," Hades shook his head. "But you could find peace there. Stop the endless roaming of the gardens for an exit that doesn't exist at this point in time."

"You're lying," you concluded finally. "You want me to eat the pomegranate so you can claim my soul for the Underworld. You're telling me there is no exit, but there is, you just don't want me to find it."

Your accusations left a mark on Hades, the brilliance of his eyes dulling as he heaved a deep sigh, letting his head hang before shaking it slowly. "I'm not lying. I'd never lie to you. I have enough souls waiting for me to give them a place here. I don't need to kidnap humans that Thanatos doesn't have on his list. It was an accident. A fatal one at that, but your stubbornness made it irreversible."

"So it's my fault, eh?" you tried to argue, but there was no bite left in your voice. Raising your hand, you dug your finger into the soft flesh of the pomegranate, felt the fruit yielding to your touch without resistance. Hades closed in, eager for you to finally accept his offering.

"You know what they say about Persephone and the pomegranate. How you trapped her, how you forced her to stay here. Tales of you don't make you look so good."

Without looking up, you could only imagine the anger or frustration that must have played on Hades' expression, but he surprised you when he picked up your hand, raised it to his lips, and slipped your pomegranate-stained finger into his mouth. You watched in horrifying fascination as the god licked off the stain on your skin with relish, the brilliance returning to his eyes as you met his gaze, confident, unwavering.

"People have long made up stories about us, but my wife has never been unhappy with me. And my pomegranates are truly delicious, I only wish for you to taste it. I wouldn't lie to you about these things. I promise I will never lie to you. It's not my nature to begin with, and I'm trying to make things better for you, not harder."

You felt the tears well up in your eyes at the sincere words of such an otherworldly creature—one you only believed to be a story that people believed in religiously. You never thought the gods could be real, much less kind and compassionate. But when you popped the first pomegranate seed into your mouth, your whole body collapsing and Hades catching you with one arm, lifting you up to his height with ease, you realized he had been truthful.

The fruit tasted tart but was absolutely delectable. It had a different kind of sweetness than the ones you had eaten on earth, and tears streamed down your face as you scooped a handful of it, greedily stuffing it into your mouth with no regard for its juices. Hades didn't seem to mind either, holding you seated on one arm, with the fruit halves in his other, the pomegranate bigger than what you were used to, yet still small in his hands even when cut open.

You cried and ate, your body rejuvenating yet also releasing all the tension and fear you had clung to. Your vision was blurry with tears, your nose stuffed, and your head so pleased with the taste of pomegranate on your tongue that it didn't think of anything else. You didn't even register that Hades turned around, strutting back towards the dark, looming palace behind the forest that was the gardens stretching out before it. He was in no hurry, yet it took him barely the blink of an eye to return to where you had first woken up.

By the time he reached the palace doors, you were fast asleep with a belly full of pomegranate, and your thoughts turned into pleasant dreams. The shadows of his body were licking at you, caressing you gently and touching you much more comfortingly than his cold hands could. Even so, he never let go of you, content with you on his arm, resting against his shoulder as if he had taken any worries from you, just like he wished to.

"I see you have received my gift."

"My Queen? You are back early."

"I have not returned yet from my duties; I merely wanted to visit my husband and bring him a gift."

Stepping down a few steps to meet Hades on his way to the palace, Persephone smiled at him warmly, cupping his cheek, which he couldn't help but melt into. She ran her thumb across his cheekbone lovingly a few times before her hand slipped from him to your head, brushing back your hair gently and revealing your face to her.

"The gods above are stirring with excitement for their special humans. Apollo has just collected an extraordinary one for himself. I know you care so little for these trends, but knowing you wait down here for me, alone and so lost in your work, you don't see the seasons pass until I return—it breaks my heart. I thought it would cheer you up to have something so precious to pass the time. You can do as you please with them, treat them as you like. They are yours to own."

"You shouldn't have. They are human, Persephone. Being in the Underworld will cause them nothing but suffering."

"Well," she huffed, agitated by her husband's chiding. They have an eternity to get used to it, just like I did. They will be fine. You can teach them to like it and show them how beautiful this realm can be if they behave themselves. Besides, the pomegranate tree bloomed the moment they came here; it must have been a sign."

Passing by her husband on the way out, she winked at him, and he knew fully well that it had not been a coincidence. Neither that you fell into the Underworld years too early, nor that the tree sprouted fruits the second you arrived. Looking down at you, he watched you furrow your brows as Persephone's warm touch vanished, and you nuzzled your head further into his shadows, trying to find just a bit of the same comfort with him that she could give you.

You truly were lovely. So small, so impossibly perfect. Precious, she called you, but of course you were since his wife knew him well. The moment Hades laid eyes on you, he knew he couldn't bear letting you go and wait until you'd inevitably return to his side as the course of life took its sweet time to reunite you two. And thanks to Persephone, he never even had to lie to you to make you eat the pomegranate on your own and so wholly, he would never have to part ways with you again.

"It is a wonderful gift, thank you," Hades admitted. Persephone smiled, laughing heartily as she made her way back to the surface, passing through the park that stretched out in front of her with ease as it let her pass towards the exit. It was her garden, after all. But even as the two separated temporarily, Hades could hear her say, "I can't wait to get to know them when I return, too."

And he couldn't wait to introduce the now two most beloved parts of his existence, either.

[obsidian-pages777]

Pick a Pile: Your Future Fashion Choice +Love interest and Lifestyle. [Girls Edition]

Top Left to Right= Pile 1->Pile 2. Bottom Left to Right= Pile 3->Pile4.

Introduction

Pick one of the Images above and you will receive some outfits inspo that will suit you the best in the future. You will also receive a reading on your potential love interest and your lifestyle.

================================================

Pile 1

Your future style exudes an office siren and badass villain energy, with a preference for a dark, sophisticated color palette—think blacks, deep reds, maroons, greys, with accents of white and gold. You might accessorize in silver occasionally, and a bold red lip will likely be your go-to. Even on a minimal makeup day, a statement accessory could add that extra spark. This overall vibe will be strikingly sharp, almost vampire-esque, with a confident boss persona that draws attention the moment you walk in. Picture yourself in a high-powered corporate setting that requires formality, yet you’ll effortlessly exude that “high-value” look.

Interestingly, this era could open doors to a potential workplace romance. Picture a formal work event where you catch the eye of a charming individual—someone who wears glasses, has messy, dark curly or straight slick hair [Think of someone with a wolfcut or think of Prince Charmont from Ella Enchanted] , and a great personality with an introverted, brooding vibe. They might hold a senior role, like a project manager or supervisor, and have a naturally appealing charisma that others admire. Despite their introverted nature, they show a sweet nervousness around you that’s endearing. Your persona during this time might be a little sharper and more direct—focused on making moves and cutting distractions.

This phase may come after a breakup or a temporary break from a relationship that was overwhelming. This prior partner may attempt to re-enter your life, but by then, you’ll have met this new, more balanced person who feels refreshingly easy to be around. You’ll trust your instincts and follow your own path, even if it’s full of unexpected twists!

================================================================================================

Pile 2

When you adopt the cozy, layered looks in the images below, it might signal a season where you crave more time at home. You'll likely prefer staying in but, on those occasions when you do go out, you'll look your absolute best, like you just stepped off the set of a fall-themed movie—very "Gilmore Girls." During this phase, your focus could be on a significant project, such as a college assignment, work project, or a challenging exam. This period is all about staying single, striving toward future goals, and building a clear vision of your success, even if it feels just out of reach for now.

In terms of romance, no specific person catches your attention, though a few people might find you quite charming. However, you’re discerning, weighing any potential connections against your ideal partner. One person, in particular, may be interested, but they don’t quite align with your ambition or vision for the future. Though they’re attractive, kind-hearted, and you share great chemistry, their lack of drive doesn’t fit with your goals.

Despite how well you get along, you ultimately decide to move on, seeking something bigger and better aligned with your vision. Though a tough, perhaps even cold choice, this person will understand, showing emotional maturity even if they’re briefly heartbroken. You might even give them a meaningful parting gift, ending things on good terms. For now, you’ll continue your journey as an “Autumnal Fairy,” focused on your dreams, knowing that in time, a more suitable match will come along.

================================================================================================

Pile 3

Unlike the other piles, you’re embracing an avant-garde style, experimenting with accessories and layering pieces that you feel harmonize creatively. You’re drawn to a wide range of colors, thinking, “What’s life without color?” This shift reflects your desire to create a more vibrant life, filled with happiness and lively connections. Expect to add graphic-print dresses and colorful, patterned skirts to your wardrobe.

Through this vibrant energy, you may serendipitously meet someone whose grounded style—favoring blacks and earthy tones—contrasts yet complements your own. This person, with tan skin and a captivating smile, is drawn to the radiance you bring. Your charm and lively conversations will leave a lasting impression, making you feel like their favorite book, a story they can’t put down. They’ll be smitten by your style and personality, enchanted by your unique way of navigating life.

Enjoy this exciting, colorful phase—cheers to what’s ahead!

================================================================================================

Pile 4

It seems you’re headed for an all-pink or mostly pastel tones typa phase in the future! You might have felt drawn to another style as well, so expect to mix up your aesthetics often, making this time especially fun. You’ll be leaning into a “doll” look, inspired by Bratz or Barbie, with a wardrobe full of pastel tones. Your vibe will likely be sweet and demure, with favorite spots to visit with friends, like cozy cafes, grocery store runs, late-night drives, and park picnics. Theme parks might also be on your list!

During this phase, there’s a significant person by your side—a taller, older partner who is strong, protective, and deeply loyal. With a cooler, steady personality, they’re both a provider and a devoted companion who treats you like royalty, always willing to support and spoil you. If you’ve manifested this connection, it’s clear your efforts have worked, as this person truly feels like a keeper.

You’ve got this—go get that bag, sis!

[tteokdoroki]

ೀ⋆OCT 31ST LEGALLY BLONDE ━━ seishiro nagi + coercion !

୨୧ — caution, you are now watching. seishiro nagi + coercion. there’s no way someone broke up with nagi because he’s too blonde!? poor baby, maybe you could provide a little emotional support…(5.5K)

୨୧ — rated r. minors, blank and ageless blogs do not interact ! nsfw, heavy smut, dark content, characters aged up to 20s, college!au, strangers to lovers (?), teaching assistant/student relationship, dom/sub dynamics, some switching, reader is lifted up by nagi, coercion, dubcon, handjobs, virginity loss, cherry chasing, oral fixation, mind break, praise kink, creampies, soft sex, clothed sex, unprotected sex, TA!reader, elle woods!nagi.

୨୧ — director’s note. happy halloween my loves! i hope you enjoy the final kinktober fic! its been super fun writing and editing for you all. stay tuned for the bonus in the coming weeks <3 - m.list ⋆ kinktober m.list ⋆ taglist ✧

this law school thing wasn’t all what it cracked up to be. 

after the love of his life, reo mikage, had broken up with him for someone smarter, blander and richer than him — nagi had been blessed with the genius idea of following his ex all the way to one of the top law schools in the world. the plan was practically fool proof, the guys at his sorority worked hard to help seishiro study — pulling all nighters for practice tests and rewarding him with naps every time he had gotten a question right. 

rin itoshi had even convinced his parents to reach out to a hollywood director so that they could film nagi’s audition tape. it obviously featured isagi and bachira too. nagi had even worn his best designer swim trunks to impress the board of admissions. they’d all been super supportive of the light haired male in his endeavours and were there when he passed his LSAT exam

with all of this combined, he had managed to get in in — if that wasn’t enough for reo, then what was?

the answer? nothing.

reo still wanted that bland, basic bitch his family was marrying him off to. she was sensible, she was rich and seishiro quickly realised that he had only ever been a bit of ditzy fun to reo — a dumb blonde to stick his dick into whenever the time felt right. eye candy and nothing more. balancing his shattering hard with the complexities of law school had been tough for the white haired male and everything seemed to be going wrong. no one would study with him, reo wouldn’t even look at him and his friends back home were busy with the wedding plans nagi so desperately wished he had. 

however, that’s when you came along. 

after having the epiphany that he didn’t need reo to succeed — nagi knuckles down and studied hard for the law firm internship being offered amongst his cohort. he was relieved to have you as a teaching assistant in the process, not only were you absolutely gorgeous but you were compassionate and empathetic. you were smart, eloquent and everything seishiro wished he could be for his ex.

perhaps that’s what drew him to you, why he followed your every word like a puppy drooling after a treat. you’d been kind to nagi for the entire semester, from helping him out with studying for the internship right down to today, where he would be taking on his very first case in a court of law. it should have been easy, the facts were simple too. the client and fellow fraternity brother  (shidou ryousei) was accused of and arrested for the murder of his wife… but something about the events weren’t seeming to add up. nagi couldn’t come up with an alibi either. 

it was as if the words; the reasonings, the justification for shidou’s freedom were right in front of grey-scale eyes, only scrambled up like morse code. “how about we take a break?” as if you were a vision from his dreams or an angel from up above, you appear behind nagi’s tall frame as he slumps defeatedly against the hotel room desk — your hands fixing themselves to his broad shoulders for a massage. “you’ve been at this all night, seishiro.”

the law student swears your touch could heal all human ailments, the warmth of your palms seeping into the tense parts of his muscles like a cell performing diffusion — relaxation forming a comfortable fog over his brain. “i know shidou didn’t do it,” nagi defends with a grumpy pout, leaning back into you so that his head rests lazily against your stomach. “he told me… he said he was getting liposuction.” 

“we’ll need evidence of that,” you note, jerking your head to the side so that nagi can write it down. this entire time you’d been such a good mentor. “good boy.” something clicks in the light-haired male’s brain, a crackle of electricity shooting down his spine at your praise — swirling around in his guts as if to activate arousal.  “run me through the witness statements again.” there’s a sensual lilt to the tone of your voice and your touch cascades from his shoulders up to his neck like a backwards flowing waterfall.

seishiro isn’t sure if he’s making things up or reading the signs correctly — but he knows that there’s some kind of tension bubbling in the air. particles that resemble an aphrodisiac using kinetic energy to collide together, painting the room with lustful colours. “shidou’s step daughter says she heard a gunshot around 2:15pm after leaving the shower, walkin’ downstairs only to find shidou hangin’ over his wife’s body — covered in blood. ugh, this is too much hassle. this doesn’t make any sense!” he tosses an annoyed sigh into quietness of the room, moaning in surprise when you cup the base of nagi’s neck to pull his head up to face you and your eyes meet.

“you need a break seishiro, we can come back to this later,” you hum, the vibrations of your voice laced with sex appeal. as he swallows thickly, the law student’s Adam’s apple bobs under the pressure of your fairy-light grip on his throat — anticipating more from you. at this point, you’re half bent over him as he leans back in the chair, pink tongue slowly darting out to cover your lips in a spit shine. “how about it?” 

this feels so wrong. nagi’s cock stirring beneath his slacks at how good and kind you’re acting towards him. no one has ever gotten him this hot before — no one aside from reo. and you were still his teacher, by technicality, it would be wrong for nagi to even consider sucking your tongue down his throat. and yet, he can’t find it in himself to stop the temperature from rising between you, for falling into your dangerously salacious trap. 

“y-yeah,” he breathes deep when you squeeze his throat a little to test the waters. “i could do with a break.” 

“me too,” you gasp all too agreeably, bending the rest of the way down to capture seishiro’s lips in a searingly hot kiss. just as he wished you pry his mouth open with the tip of your curious tongue — pushing through his plush lips and curling around his own pink appendage. the lip lock is passionate, ravenous despite the mess and spit that you exchange. he chases your lips until he can’t breathe, sloppily accepting anything you give him, letting you lead where he can’t. 

he’s never done this before, not like this, not without reo. but in this moment, the silver-blonde doesn’t think he could ever go back to making out with his ex. not now that you’re the one kissing him. 

“i-i've never done any of this before.” the blonde gulps, swallowing down the copious amount of spit that builds on the palette of his tongue — looking into your eyes as a sense of hunger dawns on him, as if you’re the very meal he’s set to devour. “not without anyone that wasn’t—“

reo. 

sure they’d done stuff together. naughty touches here and there, hands ghosting over boxer briefs and fingers tweaking nipples (sei’s were especially sensitive because of the cute little piercings his ex insisted he get) — but nothing close to actual sex, nothing with a girl, nothing with someone like you. a burning heat, unlike anything nagi’s ever felt before, begins to brew in his lower stomach. his cock rises beneath his pants that suddenly feel all too tight.

nagi’s girth twitches against his thigh as your nails rake their way down his chest and slowly pop open the buttons of his crisply pressed white shirt. it heaves beneath his clothes — heart hammering against its calcium cage of his ribs. 

“i can tell, pretty boy.” you soothe him by purring into the shell of his ear, teeth tugging at the softness of his lobe. “but you’re a good kisser though. did reo teach you that?” your lips cascade down to his neck like a gentle flowing river at the same time that your hands delve below the belt to squeeze at seishiro’s swelling erection — testing the waters. 

his hips instinctively buck up into the warmth of your palm and a grin spreads across your plush lips at the feeling of his precum soaking his underwater and smearing across your fingers in thick, clingy webs. 

white and seedy and he’s nowhere close to cumming. almost like a little virgin. 

“have you ever done this before, seishiro?” 

the sound of his name, salaciously spelt out on his tongue, earns you a high pitched whine from nagi — his head rolling to the side and his thighs squeezing together with vicious need. “n-no,” he pauses before he grunts out a response and his entire body seizes as you take a firmer grip on his cock — jamming a thumb into his leaky slit to spread his arousal. “but i wanted to i just… reo said not until marriage—“

“— you don’t have to listen to reo anymore.” you announce breathily, setting a steady pace to your fist to jerk him off with. you’ve barely started and yet your hand is already glossed in a slight sheen of pre, soiling your knuckles from its viscousness. it’s so much for someone who’s never gone father than sloppy kisses and grinding while making out. it nurtures a certain seed of satisfaction in your chest to see him so messy so fast. “you can listen to me, sweet boy. do you want this… do you want it with me?” 

without letting go of the fat, drippy cock within your grasp — you shift to stand between the desk and nagi’s chair, shoving papers and court notes to the ground in your lustful haze. nagi thrusts lazily into your closed fist as if it’s instinct, following the sensation like a moth takes to a candle light. his grey eyes grow murky like a pond, swimming with desire for you and only you.

who was reo mikage to seishiro nagi? when there was an angel like you willing to feed this inexperienced man morsels of a heavenly pleasure he’s never felt before. the lawyer in training nods at your words like an eager man fallen to siren’s song as bait. “i want you,” he whimpers airily. “i wanna with you.” 

you rub down his thick, lengthy dick far enough to have your fingertips briefly brush against seishiro’s sensitive, weightly balls — just pulsing full of seed to give to you. the feeling makes nagi jump up from his seat so that he immediately towers over you. his height doesn’t overwhelm you, not when the towering blonde collapses onto you with a case of the shakes. he trembles above you, supporting himself by using one hand on the table while is mouth sloppily finds your neck to suck on and pacify himself.

“good boy, sei,” you coo, voice as sweet as hot sugar or candy. “i want you too. i always have. you’re such a pure, darling boy. glad to see that it’s true.” your praise is hidden in your soft moans as seishiro licks at the crystalline salt on your bare skin. you’re a little too twisted, taking advantage of his inexperience and his position beneath you as a student, but neither of you seem to care in this very moment. 

sweat beads against nagi’s hairline like diamonds on an expensive Chanel necklace and roses bloom across his cheeks with exertion — his hips rise and fall into your sticky fist in fluid motions, changing the steady stream of ecstasy you provide him. your hand is a solace for his aching cock, but you still make your student work for it. make nagi chase you since he only works hard for the things he wants. and right now, he wants to reach the end of the tight rope of pleasure you have him walking on. and to stave off the stormy frustration he feels from the case.

your hand wriggles it’s way into his wet silver locks, dragging nagi’s hungry mouth over yours since he’s so desperate to taste you, to have at you. it shows in the way he roughly grabs your hips too, grip so tight it threatens to leave bruises he’ll have to apologise for later. “ngh… please. g-god. miss…a-angel please,” he stutters, his bucking into your hand faster and harder, back and forth, back and forth through the tight ring of your fist. his bright and angry red cockhead peeks through the other side, glazed in opaque white — it’s a nice feeling, blistering hot and sensitive. “i…hah… gotta—“

nagi’s lashes flutter against your cheek — a strained whine reverbing in the base of his throat while you let him fuck your hands to his heart’s content, let him chase this new pleasure he’s never known. let him fall from the high heavens with blackened and burnt angel’s wings. you make him sin, for the first time ever. something about this should feel off to nagi, his law teacher taking advantage of him like this — but at this point, he’s too far gone, drowning in a hellfire of lust. 

mocking his moans, your mouth falls open in one of your own as you follow along with the pitiful expressions crossing the contours of seishirou’s face. “what is it, sei? what do you need?”

the room is too hot. your bodies against each other are temperate in the sex tainted air — accompanied by wet slapping sounds from your hand around his throbbing cock. “n-need to let go. it h-hurts,” he sniffles out, forcing his tongue into your mouth again to calm himself down. the more you speed up, remorselessly jerking him off, the closer nagi gets to the end of his own tether. this sensation is unfamiliar, the crumbling foundation of his orgasm coming crashing down as you fling droplets of his precum and arousal about the place — some of it landing on your clothes, the desk and discarded papers. 

again, neither of you care. 

“surrender to me baby, it’s okay. i’ve got you.” guiding the pale blonde through his first ever orgasm, you pour your heated words into his slobbering mouth — tongue running over his pearly white teeth and tangling with his drool coated tongue. that’s all sei needs to hear before he crumples against you with a shout — the first wave of his high crashing over him and pulling him under. 

it’s world shattering, brain melting as he cums. his abdomen contracts under your never-ending touch, ropes of hot white dribbling from his stimulated tip like a tap that keeps running. nagi swears he almost blacks out, falling dizzy and victim to your lustful charms as he twitches and cums and cums into your soiled palm. 

“f-fuck,” a soft whimper bubbles up on his raw bitten lips, stuttered out in suprise. “w-what was that?” 

“you orgasmed for me, sei, so pretty baby.” comes another set of your gentle praises. he feels his entire body wrack with a shakes at your words, his cock doesn’t dare to soften either. “you look so good when you cum.” 

his greyish-brownish eyes roll back into his skull when you let him go, his tip slapping against his clothed tummy. the brush of his cotton shirt against the slit on his tip makes him writhe from the sensitivity. “c-can i cum for you again? promise i’ll keep being good.” 

“of course,” you grin, proud that to have corrupted the poor boy. “are you okay to let me touch you again or do you want it now?” 

“touch me. now.” he growls, gripping your hand and guiding it towards his dribbling shaft, aiding the movement of your palm around him to start slow and lazy — working seishiro up into a heat once more. this time, the way your hand languidly jerks him off is made smooth by the evidence of his last orgasm, which you now use as lube. if you weren’t pressed for time and with a court case first thing tomorrow, you would have gotten onto your knees to clean up his copious amounts of mess. 

you quickly reduce him to a babbling mess against you, drool laden on his tongue and dripping onto his skin as you drive your thumb over nagi’s hot tip in tight circles with your free hand — touching what doesn’t fit in the other. “reo treated you so badly, poor baby,” you mewl sweetly, kitten licking at his pulse point just below his neck. “you work so hard, you deserve so much better. you deserve me.” 

he believes you, blindly and naively. nodding tenderly despite the way he widely fucks both of your hands as if they’re a makeshift hole — warm and slick, all for him. dopamine shocks him at the stem of his brain, spreading throughout his body like a wildfire only you can tame — it burns so good and  feels even better to have your dainty, perfectly manicured fingers wrap around his chubby girth so deliciously.

for a moment, you let seishiro go to squeeze at his heavy breeder’s balls — noticing the way they pulsate in your palm to signify the pale blonde’s second impending orgasm. “i think…hah… i think ‘m gonna… c-cum! again!”

pushing at his shirt, you press a kiss to the creamy skin of nagi’s shoulder and hum pridefully. “thank you for letting me know, sweetheart. cum for me. give it to me.”

with your permission granted, another blinding ecstasy takes over nagi, and he falls victim to you and your merciless hands once again. blood rushes through his ears like a storm surge, drowning at your angel coos while you guide him through his high, never letting up as you palm him through it all. he quivers and his knees buckle, shooting a hot and hefty load of seed all over your hand and clothes and the papers nearby.  “o-oh! fuck…” nagi chokes on a weak sob, bleating like an innocent lamb at the slaughter house while he weighed against your shorter frame — allowing you to bare the brunt of his weight and height. 

he’s so pretty when he cums, silvering blonde locks matted to his forehead by sweat — cheeks pink and lips swollen and red. if you could, you’d swallow him whole and selfishly devour your student for all that he has to offer. silly little blonde, stupid for trusting you, for wanting to fuck you.

your hand doesn’t slow around his pulsing cock but instead speeds up, digging your thumb into his oozing slit as arousal pearls at its centre once more. “n-no, s’too much.” seishiro cries quietly, tears stinging a pathway down the apples of his milky cheeks. “it hurts.” 

“poor you, poor baby.” you say harshly, mocking the poor blonde’s sniffles and hiccups. he’s exhausted and frustrated but doesn’t dare to pull away — his hips running after your hand hungrily. “you’re so cute sei, panting for me like a bitch in heat, fucking my hand like the dumb little blonde you are.” he hisses at the overstimulation, gargles on spit as it floods his mouth to accompany his appetite for you. 

“i’m not…ngh… ‘m not dumb.” he whinges in response and before either of you know it, seishiro is cumming again. hard. soiling his lap with abundant amounts of white. his chest heaves as he comes down, collapsing against you. he might deny it later, but being dumbed down and reduced to a stupid blonde seemed to really do it for him. 

finding his lips again, you soothe nagi with short and sweet kisses that grow more feverish by his own demand. all of a sudden you find yourself pinned to the desk below with the tall blonde between your instinctually parted legs so that he can grind against your panty clad core. “you’re…you’re right,” you say, breathing deep through your nose as your composure threatens to fall apart. “you’re so smart, sei. you’re the best lawyer on our team but…” bucking your hips once, you lower your voice by an octave so that your words slip through his ears like molten chocolate. “you’re acting like a dumb slut right now. don’t you wanna be my dumb slut, sei?”

his palm flattens against the mahogany desk just above your head, caging you in against its cold surface. “y-yes i do, oh fuck. please lemme fuck you. lemme be inside. i’ll be good.” 

“are you sure, baby?” 

“please—“ 

“but sei,” you brush a stray hair that curls at the centre of his forehead, the dumb blonde looking down at you with swimming grey eyes because he’s so needy. “it’d be your first time…” 

his face scrunches, nose crinkled at its bridge and brows knitted together in frustration. now that nagi’s had a taste of your sinful elixir he can’t seem to stop, you’re like a drug an addict can’t quit. something that could ruin his life or future prospects if he doesn’t get help. and yet he can’t look away, can’t pull his body away from yours and his achy dick from between your thighs — instead leaning closer so that it sinks between your plush pussy lips. 

nagi licks his lips, tongue rolling over his bottom one as he pants desperately. “please angel,” comes his broken beg, hanging pathetically in the sex tainted hair. “i need you. need it so bad. please please please— mph—!”

satisfied with his begging, you shove a set of cum soaked digits past the swell of seishiro’s pretty lips — chuckling darkly as his tongue laps over and in between them, and he whines at the salty taste of his arousal on your skin. “atta boy,” you coo, thrusting deep into the hot cavern of his mouth until the pale blonde gags around you, swallowing your fingers down like they’re a cock. he sucks so obediently, so desperately as if to please. like a good student too — and all the while, you work on kicking off your panties and flipping up your skirt so that he can get a nice rewarding view of your glistening cunt. 

“c’mere,” you reach out to the blonde and he leans into you, letting you wrap an arm around his shoulders to keep him in place. “sei,” you gasp at the first contact of his thick, long shaft against your throbbing wet mound — mouth agape as if you’ve taken a gunshot wound to the chest. “do you know how to do this, smart boy? do you know how to fuck?”

nagi nods, pressing his forehead to yours while his hips jut forward on their own and his seedy tip brushes against your pearling clit so deliciously. at first, his movements are lax and the room is filled with the lewd squelches of your sexes moving over one another, but your breathing soon grows ragged and the salacious bump and grind becomes stickier and wetter. 

“u-uhuh.” he mumbles in response.

he’s so good for you even when his mouth is full and his mind is dazed, sucking on your fingers while he lets you overwhelm him. however, the blonde is only so well behaved and patient, and it’s not long before he slips his girth past the tight ring of your entrance without any warning. his fingertips dance up to your waist, grabbing at the fat there and using it as leverage to drag you to the edge of the table so he can sink into you further.

“oh…fucking hell!” you whimper wetly against the junction of nagi’s neck, nails digging into his shoulders to steady yourself while he sets the pace to your sinful dance. he’s bigger than what you expected (despite mapping his girth out with your hands), stretching your sloppy walls wide to accommodate for his size. you don’t complain, however, eyes rolling as he brushes up against pleasure spots you could never reach on your own. “o-oh baby, fuck me.” 

you pull your fingers out of his mouth with a lewd pop, desperate to hear the symphony of his sweet, low and sexy moans instead of having them muffled by your fingers while he fucks you for the first time. the pale blonde can hardly believe it — having your warmth wrapped around him and your cunt drool down on him like a waterfall. 

the law student throws his weight into fucking you, bullying his way into the deepest parts of your womb to slothfully fuck up your gooey insides. your cunt, your moans, your whole body has some kind of control over nagi — dumbing him down and reducing him to a sex crazed mess. to the point where he can’t even remember his ex’s name. he’s a mop of pale blonde hair and sweaty clothes, entirely hunched over you. 

“y-you’re so tight,” he tells you in a dreamy sigh, lost in the heat of your core. nagi’s grabs at your pudgy thighs and drags you back and forth onto his dick, the new deepness to his thrusts causing you to squeeze and froth around the fat base of nagi’s cock. “hah, feels so…so good.” 

wrapping your shaky legs around his slender waist, you offer up the same treatment to nagi — pulling him close to the point where he’s buried in your sluice sex right up to the hilt. his precum smears against your ribbed walls and his broken whimper echoes around your hotel room. “that’s it, fuck me like you fucked my hand, sweet boy.” lust sparks against your sex slicked bodies, your breasts bouncing with every one of nagi’s calculated yet sloppy thrusts. you can’t get enough of one another, clinging and clawing at one another’s bodies madly. “you can do it, prove to reo that you don’t need him. only me.” 

“o-only you.” nagi repeats weakly, tucking his face into your neck as he pounds you to the high heavens. the desk creaks beneath the force of his thrusts, threatening to break at the nails and bolts that hold it together. his eyelashes flutter against your skin, his low and deep moans mixed with high pitched gasps send a hot rush of dopamine across your brain and it really is all too much. 

nagi’s already cum three times and managed to fold you in half over his desk as a virgin. he feel as though he might break with how much he loves this, loves fucking you senseless. another fresh set of tears burn tracks down his face and gather in his unfairly long lashes as they tickle your skin. he hiccups and heaves against you, whilst his breathing grows ragged every time his glistening cock escapes the snugness of your tight pussy, precum stringing along your puffy folds. 

“so good baby, s-so fucking good!” your voice is broken and husky as you praise him, making his dick pulse against your g-spot over and over again. you’re fairing no better than he is, your skin blistering hot to the touch and bruised from how tight your student is gripping you — pulling you back onto his cock.

the pale blonde feels though he might burst, cream your insides like he did your hand and ruin that pretty skirt of yours — the one that sticks to his pelvis because of how close your bodies are. it’s rubbed him raw while he fucks you raw. “‘m i the best?” seishiro asks, cherishing the embrace of your viscous walls, his shaft coated in a crude mix of white as it froths from your tight little hole. “t-tell me i’m the best…” 

“t-the best i’ve ever had! f-fuck, sei!” you squeal in response, only egging the law student on, babbling your praises while fat droplets of your arousal flies about the place — painting nagi’s pelvis in a shiny gloss, curling in his white happy trail as well. 

“‘m the best. i’m the best for you.” grunting from the exertion and the very force of his own thrusts, seishiro wraps both of his strong arms around your middle and stands up from the table — taking you with him. at the new angle, the coil in your stomach only tightens and you fling your arms around his neck to prepare yourself for what’s to come next. “s’not enough, not deep enough. fuuuck you’re so wet and warm. i-i can’t,” he drawls lowly, nipping at the shell of your ear on instinct. 

that’s when seishiro begins to use his sheer strength to lift and drop you back onto his thick girth, fucking up into you at the exact same time. “g-good god!” you cry out, your impending orgasm prickling at your pelvis — shooting down each section of your spine. all of it only serves to spur nagi on. 

“give me your fingers,” he demands huskily, cantering into you from bellow — your juices running a steamy track down his heavy balls as they harshly smack against your peachy ass. “wan’ suck on ‘em. give ‘em.”

you don’t have time to register his ask because he grabs your wrist before your mind can even catch up (too occupied with the way he’s churning up your guts) and has two of your fingers in his eager little mouth — sucking on them diligently. you shudder as nagi runs his tongue between them, coats them in spit and drool that tracks across his chin once he’s done with them. 

“touch yourself for me?” he pleads through a wet whine, almost too innocently. “wanna see you cum this time.” 

it’s only then that you realise he’s been holding himself back, staving off his orgasm so he can see you writhe and gush all for him. the overstimulation must be burning at his brain, sizzling off his nerve endings and it’s probably more than the dumb little blonde virgin can take. so you do as he asks, trailing your spit slicked fingers between your bodies as they grind down on one another and you with your sensitive clit, pulling its hood back to draw tight circles over the pleasure nub. 

“o-oh! seishiro!” 

“that’s right, touch yourself f’me. wanna see you lose it like you make me lose it,” he moans softly constraining with how rough nagi pounds up into you. one of his hands slips from your hips to grope at your ass, pushing you down on him and forcing his cock to grind against that one special spot threatening to make you break. “‘m sorry,” he whimpers as though he’s going to cry. “d-don’t think i can hold back, angel.” 

“then don’t,” you gasp at the new friction, holding onto your last strings of sanity as you fumble with your clit tucked away between your ravaged folds. “i know you wanna cum for me, sei. l-let go, yeah? wanna see you break for me, like a good blonde slut.” 

your encouragement doesn’t give seishiro much choice, and while he’s in control of your bodies — his lean, strong frame anchoring you down onto his cock as it bullies your insides, you are in control of his mind. you destroy his train of thought, ruin the self-made man he was and send him tumbling into his final high. nagi’s orgasm breaks the surface viciously, pouring another load of his cum against your ripe and rippling walls. there’s still so much of it, the warm and viscous white seeping from your cunt and smearing all over your hot mound. 

the force of nagi’s high is so strong that he nearly drops you, just about managing to pin you safely to the desk once more. he’s still cumming and cumming and cumming — but that doesn’t stop him from thrusting into you hard and fast, desperate to trigger your orgasm so he can reward himself. it doesn’t take long, he’d already had you seated on the edge before his mind had shattered to pieces just from fucking you. 

you gush down his length and all over what remains of your shitty case notes (he probably didn’t need them anyways) with a pornographic shout when you finally hit your peak. it’s like the crescendo of a beautiful song — the world around you spinning and flashing white as you squirt and gush for the white haired lawyer. 

“f-fuck.” you giggle with a soft smile, fatigue washing over the both of you come down from the gates of heaven — crashing back down to earth with ecstasy still buzzing in your veins. “good boy, sei. you did so good for me,” you hum softly. “do you feel any better?” 

seishiro looks up at you from where his heavy frame has collapsed on your chest — clothes sweaty and askew, and offers you a lazy grin in return. “better,” he mumbles meekly and kisses a slither of your exposed skin, still grinding his seed into you as if to make sure it sticks. “thank you.” 

bringing a hand up to toy with his hair and soothing him, you nod. “good, we should get some rest, you’ve got a big trial tomorrow, pretty boy.” 

“do you think I can do it?” 

“i know you can, sei.” you scratch at his scalp. “i meant it. what i said earlier. you’re the best lawyer on our team. shidou’s defence stands a pretty good chance.” 

nagi grins once more, only this time he leans up to press a chaste kiss to your unexpecting mouth — pouring all of his gratefulness into it. 

because thanks to you, he feels more confident about the trial, — almost as if he’s won the trial already. and even if nagi goes lose, at least he’s won you over.

꒰ end. — all rights reserved © tteokdoroki 2023. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.

[zzencat]

Your Best Qualities - Current ⏳

From left to right. Breathe and choose.

Some of your best qualities in 5 bullet points! Decided we’d get a post to remind you of your best qualities, in case any of you guys are feelin’ down or going thru some tough weather. Let’s bring it back and focus on the good :)

To enhance accuracy before choosing: Clear your mind. Time is now patient and still. Close your eyes, inhale deeply, fill your chest up to the fullest, feel the soft air brush up against the ridges of your nose. Breathe out.

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Pile 1. Feels like family…

• you’re definitely capable of bringing peace to others or keeping harmony within your own relationships, whether they be platonic or romantic — mediator skills or a person with good judgment

• you think twice before making moves or saying things — able to find balance between being the listener and being the speaker

• your resilience is unmatched!!!! — emotionally stable and can manage finances well

• loyal and uncaring of what others think — you stick to your crew and keep good people around you

• you’re super creative and your sense of timing is impeccable — you grab opportunities like it’s nothing. it’s like you always know what to say to make others feel good, reassured, comforted, confident

Points of Interest: good natured person or has good intentions in general; balanced af; leadership skills; a good head on your shoulders; extrovert-ambivert/very healthy introvert; entrepreneurial skills; ceo/vice president/secretary vibes; the type that listens to both sides of the story before acting; calm and peaceful; bounces back easily; thoughtful; considerate; family oriented; cares for others as well as oneself; clear minded; good work-life balance; open-minded; cautious in decision making; “confident” - justin bieber; good self esteem; good attitude; faith in your abilities; optimistic; creative; cares a lot for animals; people like being around you; possible mbti: healthy exxj, enxp, ixxj

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Pile 2. I got your back.

• intimidating and classified as a loner, but in the best way possible — you either have an expanse of knowledge OR do a great deal of self-reflection — very intuitive person (EXTREMELY)

• BIG, BIIIIIIG defender energy. when it comes to defending yourself or those you love, no one can do it better than you (have you ever considered being a lawyer btw?) — potential to be materially abundant and wealthy

• you empathize and feel for others easily, even when nobody else sees it or thinks that you do (but I’ll tell ya rn, most of the time you’re the most empathetic person in the room) — in a world full of evil, you’d make villains cry and can actually help them turn a new leaf — your level of empathy and understanding is on a totally different level

• independent and mature — if people come to anyone for advice or counseling, or just a good ear, it’s you

• you are very deep and insanely caring under the surface — you might approach things logically first and try to see things from all points of view before making a decision or advising other people — you really do have the biggest heart and only those who are close can see it

Points of Interest: introvert; very smart; spends a lot of time alone; VERY LOYAL !!!!!! (almost to the point of possessiveness); may need to work on control issues and rebalancing social life; communicates differently from others; sees things from a different perspective; offers good advice; good listeners; prone to pushing people away bc you start caring too much; knows who to trust and who not to; selective; secretly creative; very nurturing but kinda doesn’t want to show it; humble/modest/doesn’t want to be seen; wants to help people but doesn’t want to be put in the spotlight for it; you’ve felt more hurt/seen more trauma than those around you; defending like their lives depend on it; perfectionists; behind the scenes, extremely intuitive; possible mbti: inxj, healthy exxj

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Pile 3. Life of The Party

• confident, outgoing, charismatic, funny as hell — there’s a lot of charm to you — you carry the energy fam, no you ARE the energy — you laugh/smile easily or cause others to

• highly ambitious and have the will to fight for what you want — you’d prob be the last one standing in a mr. beast challenge

• you light up the room !! (i keep hearing “baby, you light up my world like nobody else by 1D 😂😂😂) — potential for fame/someone in the public eye/someone in a position of power

• mischievous and fun to be around/has the most jokes — always up for a challenge or touching grass activities lmfaooo you’re always down to hang out — you don’t care if you look like an idiot as long as you’re having fun or are out with friends/family

• you don’t give up easily and take opportunities as they come — persistent, stubborn and strong-willed — you’ve achieved many things or definitely will in no time

Points of Interest: A-Class comedian; daredevil; extroverted or highly energetic; prominent fire energy, possible zodiac signs that are prominent in your natal chart (sun, moon, or rising): aries, leo, sagittarius; mistakenly seen as the leader of a group; impulsive; instigator; jumps on opportunities immediately; wearing what you want; impatient/bored easily; fast-paced; has the most friends/wants to have the most friends; easily sociable; questionable decision making, but has the most experience; likes to experiment; has seen a lot in life/plans to see a lot in life; probably a fan of fast and scary rollercoasters; among leaders, you’re the “fun” leader; confident with self-image

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Teddy note: what is guuuuuuud guys!!?!?! I’m feelin pretty nice today so I thought I’d put this out for you all as a reminder of your good qualities 😊👍 we’ve all been working pretty hard lately!! Whether that’s on your physical, mental, emotional health—it’s all very draining to do SO I hope this reminds you of things you should remember to be proud of!! It’s a checkpoint! I hope it resonates with you and if not, leave it. Thank you v much guys 😎😎

Feedback through likes, comments, and feedback and very much supported!!

[sports-on-sundays]

I’m sorry Ik request are closed but o really need a part 2 of Lando and Oscar

one for two / LN4 & OP81 / Part 2

Summary: Lando x female!Australian!McLaren marketing unit worker!reader x childhood best friend!Oscar - The drama ensues. Two Formula 1 drivers who just so happen to race for McLaren also just so happen to have fallen for you. Picks up straight after where part 1 left off. Takes place from Monaco GP 2024 to Spanish GP 2024. Short time frame, but a lot happens.

Warnings: mention of vomiting, crying, "I'll kill you" joke, swearing, very slight innuendo, if I missed anything let me know

Requested?: Yes, by this anon, everyone who answered in the poll in a way, and by @gracielukey

Author's Note: Fret not, I will be writing a part 3!

“Wait, Y/n, one second-” you hear behind you as a hand wraps itself around your arm. You look back to see Oscar Piastri beaming at you with a smile worth a ton of gold on his face. He’s out of his race suit and now back in regular street clothes: a black t-shirt, blue jeans, and an expensive black watch on his wrist. “I still haven’t given you your birthday gift yet.”

Oh, yeah, that’s right.

Earlier, when both McLaren boys had snatched each of your hands, pulling you in separate directions, both thoroughly excited to show you whatever gift they’ve gotten for you for your birthday, which just so happens to be today, the Monaco Grand Prix, you had shook them both off and waved them on to go do their PR duties.

For once in your life, as someone who is in marketing in McLaren, you got to do a fraction of your actual job concerning the two drivers, and not play the part of both their dramatic love interest.

Yet here you are again, looking back at a handsome Australian boy with earnest brown eyes, waiting for you to come with him so you can see your present.

You sigh, smiling. “Alright, Oscar. Show me this present of mine.”

He leads you to his driver’s room, where he holds the door for you to follow him in, and gently shuts it.

You have a jolting memory of the last time you were led into a driver’s room and the door was shut behind you, and the driver was saying he had something for you. It had been Lando’s driver’s room in Miami, after he won the race, and, well, you’ll never forget what the gift he had for you had been.

Lando’s kiss.

Though it didn’t really change anything at all, it seemed to change absolutely everything.

And now, just standing here, watching Oscar rummage around in his piles and bags of contained mess, you can’t help yourself from blushing as the memory floods back to you.

Oscar snaps you out of your dreams, though, when he straightens, holding up a small box that fits in his palm and a white envelope, and says, “Here… Don’t know if it’s your type of thing, but…”

“Jewelry?” you raise your eyebrows, eyeing the box.

He nods. “I don’t see you wearing jewelry a whole ton, but I thought you might really like this, regardless.”

You smile. “Usually I save it for special occasions, but I like wearing jewelry. Now, let’s see this card here…” He hands it to you, and you open it up. Oscar watches you intently as you begin reading his not-too-messy, not-too-neat handwriting.

Dear Y/n,

I just want to take this opportunity to say how much I appreciate you. You, as a person. Everything about you, I love. Your teasing, your jokes, your playfulness. Your hard work and dedication. You’re so understanding and kind. I love how gentle you are, yet also tough. You’re the perfect balance, for me and for anyone. You have the softest, most beautiful, caring heart, but a tough skin, too, and you can hold your own. You’re so strong and capable, too. I admire you in so many ways.

I love being with you. Time spent with you is my favorite time. Whether we’re just laying or sitting somewhere together, basking in each other’s silence and simply company, or going out somewhere, exploring someplace, and experiencing something together. I love it. I adore it. I love being with you.

Sometimes, I think about when we were little kids. I think about how we’d sit together and whine about how hard it is to be an older sibling, or how this or that rule by our parents was stupid. I remember playing with you, exploring. Even then, Y/n, we were forming a bond, and I think it’s beautiful. I hope we stay like this forever. Together.

I just want to be with you.

I remember as I got older and I moved, I missed you so much. So, so much. We stayed in touch, but you don’t know how much was missing without you always by my side. It’s like in a way you complete me.

I’m so glad that fate and time and whatever else all worked together that today, right now, you can be with me, on your twenty-third birthday. Twenty-three years, Y/n, I’ve known you. You’ve been my best friend. Somehow, we always keep running into each other. Like as if time and space and the universe knows we’re meant to be with each other, for each other, and it won’t let us be separated for too long. Like me and you have a magnet.

I love it, Y/n, and I hope you do, too.

I also love how beautiful you are. Your stunning eyes when they look straight into mine. The way you look over your shoulder and wink teasingly. The way your eyebrows scrunch together when you’re working hard or trying to figure something out. The way you flip your hair, the way you walk, the way you talk, the way you laugh, and the way your touch feels; I love every single little ‘way’ about you. You are it, everything I want. I don’t know what you feel, but I know that for years, I knew it.

I knew I’m supposed to be with you.

If you don’t think so, that’s okay. But just know what I know. Because for years I was terrified to say it, but now, I know.

I know this, Y/n:

I love you. I always have, and I always will.

Yours truly, Oscar Jack Piastri 5/26/24

As you read the last words, you feel a lump forming in your throat as you softly gasp, “Oscar…”

“I’m sorry if it’s a bit over the top,” he says right away with a slightly nervous chuckle. “I don’t mean to seem sappy. I should have just left it at ‘happy birthday’...”

“No, no-”

“I just had a lot to say, I guess,” Oscar mutters, glancing down. “A lot to say, to make up for the years of staying silent.”

“Oh, Oscar, stop!” you laugh, your voice cracking as you suddenly throw your arms around him in a tight embrace. You feel your eyes begin to water as you squeeze them shut tightly and bury your head in his shoulder, murmuring, “This is the sweetest thing I’ve ever read, Osc… You’re going to make me cry…”

As you hug him, it’s like a weight is lifted off his shoulders. He wraps his arms around you back, his hand slowly, absently beginning to rub your back.

You sniff a bit, whispering close to his ear, “That’s just about the most beautiful thing I’ve read… Oscar, I- I, um… I-” love you, too, your brain screams, begging your lips to form the words. You love him, Y/n. You know you do. Just say the words. Just say them.

But you finish with, “I- Thank you so much, Oscar. Thank you.”

He nods, resting his cheek on your head for a few seconds, before murmuring, “Why don’t you open the gift now?”

You nod, slowly leaning away. You mop up your eyes with your hands before taking the box. You slowly open it and gasp when you see a sparkling green gemstone inside, attached to a golden chain. “Oscar…” you breathe. “It’s beautiful…” You slowly begin taking it out of the box.

“Emerald, for May, on a gold necklace chain.”

You stop taking it out of the box to freeze and look up in surprise, eyes wide. “Real emerald? Real gold?!”

“Yes,” Oscar chuckles. “Yes, Y/n. It’s a real emerald on a real gold chain.”

Your jaw drops as you blubber, “Oscar… Oh my God, Oscar… you didn’t have to…”

“I think you’ve forgotten I can afford it. And I would spend any amount of money, if it was for you. But do you like it?”

“What do you mean?!” you exclaim. “What sort of question is that? Of course I like it! I love it!”

At that, the young McLaren driver immediately beams. “Here- want me to put it on you?” You nod vigorously, so Oscar takes the necklace gently from your hands and reaches around your neck to clasp it on you. You feel his soft hands briefly brush the skin of your neck, sending a shiver down your spine, before he takes them away and leans back to view you. “It looks lovely on you. Compliments your features.”

“You really think so?”

He grins with a soft chuckle. “Y/n, I know so.”

Once you’re done sitting with Oscar for a bit after that, just being with him, you exit his driver’s room into the hallway with a tired but contented sigh. You tuck Oscar’s note and the box the necklace came in into your pants pocket, about to get going and continue on with your life, when, once again, you’re interrupted.

You suddenly feel two strong arms wrapping around you from behind as the scent of Lando’s cologne fills your nostrils. He leans close to your ear, rocking you a bit, before murmuring in a gentle, concerned voice, “Hey, Y/n… How are you?”

You smile softly, feeling his warmth against your back. “I’m alright,” you sigh, your head still slightly in the clouds about Oscar’s note and gift.

Lando unwraps his arms from around you and gently guides you by your shoulders to turn around and face him. “What were you doing, hm?” he suddenly asks softly.

“What do you mean?” you ask, eyebrows furrowing.

“In Oscar’s driver’s room. I saw you leave.” His tone is in no way accusatory. Just genuinely concerned.

“Nothing,” you frown, licking your lips. “Why do you care?”

He crosses his arms, the concern mostly falling off his face now as he says simply, reaching up to drag his thumb under your eye, “Because of this.” He holds up his thumb to show the chalky smeared mascara on it. “And because of the redness around your eyes. Are you okay?” The concern comes flooding back as he lifts his other hand to gently touch your cheek. “Did something happen? Did Oscar do something? Y/n, you know you can tell me. You know you can trust me.”

But you can’t help yourself but chuckle. In a way, it’s sweet how caring and worried Lando is acting, looking out for you like that. But also kind of funny that Lando thinks Oscar Piastri even has the capacity to do you any harm, at least not on purpose. So you say, “No, no, Lando! Don’t worry! I’m not upset! Those were happy tears!”

Lando doesn’t look much less concerned, though. “What made you so happy?” he asks carefully.

You sigh, figuring there’s no reason to not tell Lando, at least partially the truth. “Oscar just gave me a super sweet birthday gift is all.”

“Oh,” Lando nods slowly. “What was it?”

You smile and point at the necklace hanging around your neck, resting perfectly in the middle of your chest. “This…”

“Oh,” Lando says again, this time more impressed, looking down at it. “That… It looks beautiful on you.”

You smile wider. “Thanks.”

But then the British man swallows. “I know you’re probably tired and wanting to get back to your hotel room, but I have a gift for you, too.”

“Just make sure it’s not a kiss this time,” you softly tease. “I don’t think my heart can take it right now.”

“No, no, of course not. I actually bought you something for your birthday!” the Brit chuckles, his hand naturally falling to the small of your back as he leads you to his driver’s room. He keeps the door hanging open, though, and you’re sure that’s intentional, to give you more of a sense of reassurance. You appreciate it. “Alright!” he says, clapping his hands together. “Close your eyes and hold out your hands.” You shrug and obey, doing so. You feel him place some light, small item in your hand, before he says, “Alright! Open!”

You chuckle as you open your eyes, teasing, “What was the point of having me close my eyes?”

“So it was a surprise! Now look at what I got you, for God’s sake, Y/n!” he rolls his eyes jokingly.

You look down at the little card in your hand, shaped like a credit card. You bring it to your face and study it, until your eyes widen when you recognize what it is. “Lando, is this…?”

He grins broader as he sees the sparkle in your eyes. “Yeah, yeah. It is.”

“You didn’t have to!” you laugh. A gift card for a free weekend to a luxury spa. You’ve often told Lando how nice it’d be to have a spa day, just relaxing and letting the weight off your shoulders.

But you weren’t expecting it as a birthday gift! And you definitely weren't expecting some expensive luxurious place, and for a whole weekend!

“And,” he smiles, reaching in his pocket to pull out a second, identical card which he places in your hand, too, “A second one, because I figured it’d be no fun alone, so you could bring one of your girl friends or something.”

You throw your arms around Lando and peck his cheek, which is a lot more of an easy thing to do with Lando than it is with Oscar. Oscar, you’re more emotionally connected with. But physically and romantically, you’re a lot more connected to Lando. Lando giggles as you exclaim, “How’d you even think to do this?”

He shrugs. “You talk about it. And you work constantly, so damn hard, you deserve a break. You don’t get enough credit for all you do. Take a weekend to just relax and enjoy, hm?”

You smile and shut your eyes, nuzzling your face into his neck, loving the sentiment, loving the gift, and loving Lando’s attitude in recognizing how hard you do work.

It feels so good to simply be appreciated.

The day after the Monaco Grand Prix, that Monday, Oscar texts you, asking you if you'd like the meet up before you have to go back to the U.K.

You're leaving tomorrow, so it had to be a yes.

Now you sit next to Oscar in his car, in the parking lot, as you buckle your seat belt and Oscar absently drums his fingers on the steering wheel.

Finally you break the silence with, "So, what's the plan, Stan?"

"Um..." Oscar begins, and just by one quick glance, you can see the deep thought written across his face as he looks forward out the windshield.

And you're right. The Aussie's thoughts are raging, about only one thing. And that thing, of course, being you.

He bites his lip, feeling a pang of slight desperation, but mostly just indescision.

He thought the nice note he wrote you for your birthday would've... given more of a reaction. Or maybe the necklace would've pulled at your heartstrings a little more. Just... Just a hug felt wrong to Oscar.

Why doesn't she love me back?

I whisper of a thought in his mind responds, Maybe it's got to do with Lando. Maybe she just simply doesn't love you because she loves Lando more.

He swallows a lump in his throat, pushing that thought out of his mind with, No, Oscar. She said she's got nothing more with Lando than she's got with you. You need to trust her. You know you love her. Therefore, trust her.

Of course, naturally, Oscar has no idea that he really shouldn't trust you.

Prompted by his thoughts, Oscar suddenly asks you, ignoring your own question, "Did Lando get you anything for your birthday? Just asking, because, you know, he had said he had something...?"

"Oh, yeah!" you exclaim. Oscar can't help but recognize the way your face lights up at the mention of merely Lando's name. You continue, "He got me a free weekend to a spa for two people!"

"Oh. You're going to a spa with him?" Oscar says slightly absently.

You laugh. "No, he suggested probably one of my friends. Lando would've told me if he wanted to go."

"Ah, right. Of course."

"Oscar?" you suddenly say, concerned, leaning closer. You place your hand on top of Oscar's drumming fingers on the wheel, forcing the nervous movement to stop. "Is something wrong?"

"Hmmm..." he sighs. Oscar, you've just got to make a move. A real move. Lando is loud, impulsive, fun. He wouldn't second guess.

Maybe you should take a hint from Lando.

Maybe she just needs to see, feel, experience me.

That doesn't sound right.

That doesn't sound like me.

Oscar closes his eyes, leaning back, entwining his fingers around your hand.

I'm not Lando Norris. So is that it?

That's it. I'm just not Lando Norris.

But despite the proclamation in his head, he snaps himself out of it. "Just... thinking back on the race. Sorry."

"Are you sure you're okay, Osc?" you lean in, more concerned.

It's like Oscar can feel his heart being squeezed, warmed. And another, louder, sudden thought enters his mind:

You won't let her go, Oscar, and you know that. You'll fight for her. You'll change for her.

You'll never be Lando Norris, but maybe you've just got to quit overthinking and start acting.

"Alright!" he says, a quite sudden smile appearing on his face as he squeezes your hand. "Yeah, I'm sure." He smiles, bringing your hand to his mouth to gently kiss the back of it.

He doesn't really see the blush on your cheeks when he does that.

He lets go of your hand and says, "Alrighty, let's go. I've got somewhere to bring you."

When you get to the destination, you laugh. "Oscar, it's just a park! You made it seem like you had this big thing planned."

"Oh," he smiles a bit. "Well, sorry. Do you have something against parks?"

"No- I'm just saying-"

"Yes, sure, whatever." He suddenly snatches your hand as he says, "Let's just go for a nice walk."

It's not common for Oscar to just take your hand like that, so confidently. Lando? Sure, all the time. But not really Oscar...

But you kind of like it.

As you walk, you just chat, until you're sure you've walked the entirety of Monaco before Oscar finally gestures to a lone bench in a solitary area, and you sit down together, hands still latched.

But you let go of his, saying with a chuckle, "I just... You know, my hands are sweaty."

"Oh, sure, of course. Mine probably are, too," he responds, running a hand through his hair.

You watch him intently as he does this, and reply a few seconds too late, "Oh, no, no, they're not! I like your hands."

And you immediately blush at the fact you actually just told Oscar Piastri that.

But he looks over with that little crooked teasing smile of his and says, "Do you?"

You grin back and shrug. "Hell yeah."

"Hm. I'll keep that in mind, then."

That makes your mind immediately wander to what he could mean, and you feel bad for what you immediately think of.

Regardless, your face flushes.

And then Oscar makes the decision that he's wanted to make for months, and probably years. His twinkling eye meets yours as he says, "You like my hands? Well I like your lips."

Your breath catches and butterflies well up in your stomach as Oscar leans in closer. His hand gently cups your chin as he looks you straight in your eyes, his softening by the second.

In the exact moment that he should just lean in and kiss you, he hesitates and asks, "Is it okay if I-"

"Oscar! Yes!" you say without thinking.

Yeah, yeah. There you go again. Not thinking again, in the exact moments that you should think about it the most.

Oscar leans in, his head tilting to the side slightly as his soft lips meet yours. Your head spins as he strokes your cheek.

It's not too long and not too short. He pulls away, gazing warmly into your eyes.

There was something different about Oscar's kiss. Lando kissed you and kept kissing you, as if he couldn't get enough. Oscar stopped as soon as he knew it was the perfect time for both of you to pull away. Lando's kiss was hungry, Oscar's wasn't really. He enjoyed it, but...

You don't know.

Oscar's more romantic.

You feel simply by the way he looks at you...

You feel like a jewel. You feel beautiful.

Physically, Lando's kiss was probably better. But emotionally, Oscar's...?

You never knew Oscar could be this romantic. But, to be honest with yourself, Lando's kiss was hotter. Sexier.

God, you loved both.

You groan, falling into Oscar, throwing your arms around him.

Y/n! Y/n! You're comparing the kissing styles of the two guys you kissed without the other knowing!

They both think you're theirs!

"Are you okay?" Oscar immediately asks. "Listen, I'm sorry- Oh, God, listen-"

"No! Oscar, thank you..." you blurt shakily, leaning back to look at him.

"Uh... you're welcome..." He falters, before saying, "So... does this mean you want to be my girlfriend?"

Oh, God.

"Oh, uh, I don't think I'm ready for that- uh-" you begin nervously.

"Right," comes the brown eyed boy's curt response.

Oscar Piastri's vague clean scent fills your nostrils. Or perhaps it's the clean hotel sheets you lay in next to him. His soft touch massages your hand as you hum a song.

You know all the words, but you forgot the tune.

In another reality, he would kiss you and hold you and call you his. You would say without a fragment of a doubt that you are his girlfriend.

Like an arrow to your heart, his voice asks you once more: "Does this mean you want to be my girlfriend?"

You're leaning against his bare chest, listening to his heartbeat, British voice speaking but saying nothing, and you begin, "Oh, uh, I-"

You wake up with a start, gasping. The last thing you remember of your dream was laying with Lando, about to tell him you love him.

What the hell, Y/n?

“What’s up?” you ask as you answer your vibrating cellphone.

Lando Norris on the other end responds, “Nothing much. What’s up with you.”

“Dunno. Just packing up to get ready to be leaving Monaco. But why’d you call?”

“Hey, whoa, whoa,” Lando suddenly says. “Why’re you leaving Monaco so early? Come on, now!”

You sigh with a little smile, rolling your eyes as you throw another shirt in your suitcase. “Lando, this country is uber expensive. There’s no way I’m staying here any longer than I have to. The hotel price is ridiculous, and the rest of the team is leaving, anyway.”

Lando tsks before saying, “Come on, now. You won’t have to pay for a hotel room for extra days, you know. You can stay at my place, duh.”

Your eyebrows shoot up. “Oh, Lando. You really want me to stay in Monaco.”

“Of course I do. But you know I’d let you stay at my place anytime.”

“Mmmhm. I know…”

“So? What do you say?” Lando asks.

You hesitate, before saying, "Lan, I already told the team I'd be leaving on the plane with them..."

“For God’s sake, Y/n, then tell them you’re not, check out of that damn hotel room, and c’mere!”

“Come where?!” you ask in slight exasperation.

“Where do you think? My flat!”

“Alright, alright, I’ll do that, jeez. Text me your address. But God, why are you getting so worked up about this?”

There’s more silence before the Monaco resident says softer, “I just really want to see you, is all.”

You raise your eyebrows and say softer as you zip up your suitcase. “That’s it?”

“Yeah,” he snorts. “Not good enough for you, princess?” he teases.

“No,” you breathe, a slight smile forming on your face as warmth spreads across it. “No, that’s perfectly, one hundred percent, all the way, good enough for me.”

“Good.” You can hear the grin in Lando’s voice. “Then I’ll see you in a bit, you beauty.”

When you arrive at his flat and he opens the door, Lando wraps his arms around you, patting your back, before letting you go. “Hey, wanna come to the living room?”

“Sure,” you nod, taking in the rooms you go through as he leads you to the living space. You’ve never been in Lando’s flat before, but you have to say, it is thoroughly impressive. Soon, you’re in the living room, and the two of you plop down on the couch together. You sink into it and lean back, saying, “This is comfy.”

Lando just takes your hand and says, “Thanks.”

But you look up at him with a soft teasing smile. “So, are you going to tell me why on earth you suddenly got so clingy? You’re acting like we haven’t seen each other in three years! Just as a reminder, it was just two days ago.”

But Lando smirks, shrugging, and says teasingly, “Maybe I’m just a little obsessed…?”

“Obsessed?” you smile wider, leaning your head onto his shoulder. “Oh, don’t flatter me.”

“Aw, why not? You’re cute when you’re blushing…”

“Lando, stop,” you snort, then add, “We’re supposed to be friends. I don’t think friends say this kind of shit to each other.”

“I like the way you say, ‘we’re supposed to be,’” the race car driver begins.

“Lando! We are friends, and that’s all we’ll ever be!” you respond firmer, but deep down, you have your doubts. Your extreme doubts. Because being with Lando, it never feels like a friendship anymore, and you both know everyday you get closer and closer to finally just admitting you’re dating.

And the only reason why you haven’t yet is because of the certain someone in the way. Oscar Piastri, the sweet Australian boy from your childhood and teenage dreams.

Who kissed you like he meant it yesterday at around this time.

You feel your stomach lurch at the thought.

How can I so shamelessly act like this with Lando, when I know twenty-four hours ago I kissed Oscar back?

You jump when Lando says, almost as if he could hear your thoughts, “Is something wrong?"

You look up in slight surprise, eyes wide. “Uh- of course not. Why do you ask?"

But Lando's frown deepens. "Y/n, stop that. You know I know you're lying. I can see it on your face when something is bothering you."

You bite your lip. "Nothing is."

Lando heaves a big sigh before suddenly pulling you into his lap.

You flinch and lean away in extreme embarrassment, "Lando, what-"

"Just let me hug you, hm? You always say you're fine when you're not and I just want to help you. Let me at least hug you."

You sigh deeply and slowly let yourself lean into him. He strokes your hairline gently, and begins rambling. Lando Rambling, but in a gentle whisper.

You swallow back the huge lump in your throat, and despite your squeezed shut eyes and your raging mind, it's nice.

Until Lando is gently shaking you, and your eyes flutter open as you realize you had fallen into a calm, dreamless sleep against him. You feel his soft, nearly heavenly chuckle vibrating in your ear before you lean your head off his chest slowly. "Rise and shine, princess. You went right to sleep."

You yawn. "Shit, sorry about that..."

But Lando beams. "It's okay. It was cute. And do you feel a bit better now?"

You sigh and nod. "Yeah. I do, actually."

"Good," he grins, eyes twinkling, and leans in to give you a kiss on your cheek. "You probably just needed a nice big long nap."

You sigh.

If only it was as simple as that, Lando.

When I'm with Oscar, he seems like the obvious choice. But then I'm with Lando and he's so sweet and caring and loving and understanding and lighthearted and fun and handsome and perfect and-

And then he seems like the obvious choice.

Oh, Oscar. I couldn't stand to break your heart of gold, though.

And suddenly you freeze as Lando seems to read your mind for a second time, his voice saying softly near your ear, "Is it okay if I call Oscar?"

You snap your head back to meet Lando's eyes. "What reason have you got to call Oscar...?"

“So he can come over.”

You stare at him like he’s the craziest man alive. “Come again?”

“So he can come over and join us, Y/n. But you heard me the first time.”

“What’s your problem?” you asked quite bluntly.

“What’s yours?”

You stare at Lando, completely at a loss for words. Feeling slightly called out, to be honest. You breath deeply, before, with much effort, finally forming the sentence under Lando’s expectant gaze, “Lando, you know that Oscar thinks we’re dating. Even though we’re obviously not. If Oscar shows up… Lando, there’s too much drama you don’t know about. That wouldn’t-”

Lando raises his eyebrows, unimpressed, and says, “I know more than you think I do.”

You swallow, anxiously licking your lips. “Why do you want Osc over?”

“I’ve got some things to talk about with you. And him. With the two of you.”

Your face scrunches up as you ask hopefully, “About work?”

“Nope,” Lando says sternly as he opens his phone, scrolling his contacts, looking for Oscar’s.

You’re starting to get nervous. Real nervous. “Lando, please,” you begin, your voice laced with a certain amount of fear as you take the man’s hand. “Lando, what are you trying to do? Why? Lando, I… I’m not ready… Can you talk to me first?”

Lando looks up at you. “You clearly know what I’m doing, then, otherwise you wouldn’t be so panicked.”

“Of course I do…” you breathe. How the hell did it come to this?

Why did I think Lando was stupider than this? To not see the writing on the wall? To not see what’s clear as day?

Lando leans in closer, wrapping both his hands around yours. He stares you straight in your eyes. Everything about his actions is gentle, but his voice is painfully stern as he begins nearly whispering, “Y/n. I’m sick of this, and Oscar is, too. And you’ve had enough of this, too, whether you think you have or you haven't. I understand to a certain degree what’s been going on, but I don’t think Oscar has allowed himself to. We need to, the three of us, talk this over and figure this out. Pretending isn’t going to do you any good any longer, Y/n. And I think me and Oscar can both agree on the fact that we just want the best for you, yeah? So I know this is hard, but if you wait any longer, the situation will just get worse and worse. And now I’ve figured you out, so let’s just deal with this together, the three of us, and be honest. Okay?”

You hesitate as your eyes start to water.

You feel like you want to throw up.

I never wanted this to happen. I never wanted it to come to this. I just wanted it to work itself out on it’s own. I didn’t want Lando or Oscar to know. I wanted to figure it out alone.

“Lando,” you sniff, your voice cracking. Lando leans over to one of the end tables to grab a tissue, which he uses to wipe a tear rolling down your cheek. As you continue to cry, he hands the tissue to you and begins holding your hand as you use the other to rest your heavy head against it.

You sit there together for a while as you just cry, working through the emotions of the last months. Once you’re finally done, Lando says gently, “It might not get any easier, but please, Y/n. If you’re honest with me and Oscar, I hope you know that we’ll always be ready to help you and be there for you.”

“I know that…” you sniff. “It’s just… I don’t want to lose either of you, Lando. I can’t stand to imagine losing either of you.”

Lando nods slowly, and murmurs, “I can’t speak for Oscar, but just so you know, whatever happens, no matter what, you’ll always be my friend. And I’ll always be there for you. M’kay?”

You nod slowly, wiping your eyes one last time, those words providing just enough comfort for the time being.

“Alright,” Lando says, gently patting your hand. “Can I call Oscar? I’m sure I’ll be able to convince him to come over.”

“Yeah,” you smile weakly. “Unless he’s still sleeping.”

Lando nods and grins as he picks up his phone again to call Oscar Piastri.

When Lando goes to open the door, you follow close behind him, fiddling with your fingers anxiously. When he does open it, a surprised Oscar immediately sees you behind him and exclaims your name in shock. "Why are you here?"

"I invited her, too," Lando replies confidently, as if this is all completely normal, looking Oscar straight in his sweet brown eyes.

"Ah," Oscar nods slowly. "I can see that." He smiles awkwardly at you as Lando brings him in. He mostly just looks thoroughly confused, but doesn't take his eyes off you for a second.

Soon, you're all seated around Lando's dining room table, you and Oscar on one side, facing a lone Lando on the other side, feeling like you're about to be interrogated.

While Lando doesn't ask, 'Where were you at the time of the murder?' he does say, "I think we've all got some thing to be honest about. Oscar, I mentioned it on the phone to you, but I think all three of us have got some... stuff to discuss."

Neither you or Oscar say anything. You're too nervous to speak, and Oscar's too confused.

Lando sighs, seeing neither you or Oscar have nothing much to say, and says, "Alright, then." He slaps his palms down on the table. "Oscar, you and Y/n... You'd like to date her, yeah?"

Immediately Oscar's eyes widen, and his hand tightens around his cellphone in his hand as his pale cheeks redden. "I- What sort of-"

"Do you?"

"Yeah," Oscar admits carefully, but sort of bluntly.

"I'd like to date Y/n, too."

Oscar stares at Lando. His grip on his phone tightens slightly, but that's the only sign of a reaction his body shows as he says softer, "Well, of course."

Lando's gaze averts to you.

You sigh. The awkwardness in the air is making it stuffy and hard to breathe. The tension in the room is thick enough to cut.

"Y/n?" Lando prompts.

Your words get caught in your throat, and instead comes out a weak cough.

Apparently Oscar takes it as a sob, because immediately his hand is on your back, and he's leaning close, saying softly, "Y/n. Are you okay?"

As you bury your face in your hands and nod, you don't catch the dirty look Oscar throws Lando, and Lando's effort to ignore it. Once you've caught your breath, you barely get out, "I love you both."

Oscar's hand slips off your back as Lando reaches across the table to take your hand in his.

"I- you-" Oscar begins, before his eyes turn on Lando. "You knew about this, Lando? You knew?" You can feel the stress and, frankly, anger, radiating off of him as Oscar says, turning to you, "Y/n, I told you if you loved Lando, you could let me go. I would've taken it..." He runs a hand through his hair. "I would've. Y/n, I swear I would've. Why'd you have to play with my heartstrings? Why'd you do that, Y/n? Why'd you do that to m-"

"Oscar, stop!" Lando suddenly snaps, standing up. "Don't you see the state she's in? This is harder for her than it is for you!"

"Just stop fighting," you barely whisper.

Neither men hear you as Lando grabs Oscar's wrist and tells you sternly, "Y/n, you just stay here. I'm gonna go talk with Oscar alone, if that's fine."

But Lando doesn't wait for your input before he tugs Oscar out of the room and slams the door behind him. You suppose it wouldn't matter much anyway. It's not like you would have any idea what to say, anyway, if you'd have been given the chance.

You stare ahead in a strange mixture of regret and dread. Fear of past decisions and fear of future decisions, too.

After the door slams, unbeknownst to you, Lando immediately shoves Oscar against the wall and snaps, "What the hell, man?"

A long breath exits Oscar's lungs as he stares back into Lando's hazel eyes. "What?" he sighs.

"Don't you see she's in distress? Give the girl a break-"

"I need to give her a break? Lando, I kissed her. Do you think I would've fucking done that if I knew she was seeing you? We can both say it was all friendships all along, but we also both know this's bullshit." Oscar gulps before muttering, "She's a fucking cheater."

"No, she's not!" Lando suddenly defends. "You just don't understand."

"Yeah! Clearly I don't," Oscar says gruffly.

"So are you going to let me explain what I think went on?"

"Why don't we hear it straight from her? You could very well be biased."

"Do you think she wants to say it? Oscar," Lando sighs. "Won't you just listen to me?"

Lando watches as the Australian bites his lip, before saying, "Have you kissed?"

"Once."

"Same..." Oscar hesitates once more before asking, "So it's just the 'friend' thing? She's in love with both of us so she's been convincing herself she can stay both our friends forever."

"Well... right. And neither of us knew that was going on, and... Yeah, you know."

"How'd you find out?"

"It became too obvious. But Oscar, you've had your suspicions before the beginning."

Oscar sighs, staring down. "Right. So. She denied it because she loved us both."

"That's what I'm reckoning."

"What did she think she'd accomplish? Why did she think letting that happen would do any good? We both thought she was single. And technically, she was, but not really, because, we- you- I- you- you know..." Oscar trails off before dragging his hand across his face and leaving it over his eyes. "Oh, God."

"It's complicated," Lando nearly whispers.

"You... You can say that again..." Oscar breathes, his voice cracking as his other hand goes to his face, his pointer and middle finger pressing hard into his temple.

"Oscar?" Lando suddenly asks, his hand resting on the younger man's shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"Shit... I don't know..."

"Oscar, are you-"

"No- I mean, I am, but-"

Oscar is interrupted by Lando's arms suddenly wrapping around him in a hug and Lando murmuring, "Now both of you are crying?"

Oscar, despite himself, finds his face falling into Lando's shoulder as he begins, his voice just slightly hoarse, "I'm not crying, by the way. It's just... Lando, I've been in love with her for years; I swear, probably a decade by now. And I've known her literally my whole life. A part of me just always expected she'd always be there and I'd always just... that I'd always have enough time to wake up one morning and ask her out. I should have done it quite literally years ago. But I didn't and that's why we're here now, me feeling as if I have more of a right to her love, though really, I'm not worthy of her at all." Oscar lets out a shakily breath before adding, "I regret it so, so much, Lando."

Lando's arms around him tighten. "I'm so sorry."

"You don't have anything to apologize for."

"Osc, I just want her to be happy. But I know her dating me isn't the solution. Because she'd be devastated to date me but not you, and vise versa. She's head over heels for us both."

Oscar gulps. "Well, then what the hell do you suggest?" He leans away from Lando, wiping at his eyes with his thumb.

"Oh, Oscar," Lando sighs deeply. "I don't fucking know."

After that, the two stand in silent contemplation, worrying, pondering. Feeling. Emotion. Passion. Pain.

Before Lando finally says carefully, as if walking on eggshells, "...What if we both dated her...? Just kept doing what we've been doing, but the other one knows about it, so she doesn't have to feel guilty about it, but we both still... you know, get to date her?"

Oscar bites his lip. "Couldn't that get complicated?"

"Of course it could..." Lando trails off, before picking up more positively, "But sometimes the easier way isn't the right way, Oscar. We both know it'd make her happier to date us both. And we both know we'd both be happier if we could date her, yeah?"

Oscar's silent, considering, his eyes slightly glazed over, despite the battle that's going on inside his mind.

"Osc...? Osc, please, mate. I think it's the best shot we've got. It'd mean the world to me-"

"Yeah," Oscar suddenly interrupts with a nod, leaning off the hallway's wall. "Yeah, I get what you're saying. We can try that Lando," he says curtly, almost hollowly as he suddenly reaches for the door handle back to the dining room where you sit.

But right before his hand meets the knob, Lando snatches it away in his own, pulling Oscar to face him again.

Oscar can't help but feel awkward at how close his face is to the other Formula 1 driver's, and averts his eyes to the floor because of this.

But Lando responds simply, "Oscar, look at me. In my eyes."

Oscar sighs and looks up, meeting the strong eyes of Lando Norris. "What?" he barely whispers.

"Thank you so much, okay?" Lando murmurs, squeezing Oscar's hand.

To Oscar, everything seems wrong. Why is he standing with his teammate, his rival, this close, holding hands, with such intense eye contact? This should be just him and you. Lando shouldn't be a part of this.

How was he so stupid to let Lando ruin it all?

Oscar, just try to trust Lando? Maybe he's right? You can conform for now, but don't conform with malice. Only allow yourself to feel anger towards Lando after it all falls apart because of him.

"'Kay," Oscar mutters back.

"And, listen, Oscar. I hope you know you can trust me. I care about you, too. So much. I like you so much. So, please. Just be real with me. M'kay?"

"Of course... Can we go back and see Y/n now?" Oscar mumbles, feeling slightly uncomfortable at Lando's extreme sincerity.

Alright, maybe more than just slightly uncomfortable.

"Sure," Lando nods, and the two men come walking back in.

They sit down, and once they've finished explaining to you their idea, you ask, "So, you're saying we all date? The three of us, together?"

"Yeah," Lando responds with a smile at the same time as Oscar responding, "Well, sort of-"

Both your pairs of eyes turn to Oscar. He swallows and adds, "I mean, yeah. Of course. Just sounds weird to me, for three people to be dating, but it's just because I'm not used to it, you know? It's good. It's fine."

"Oscar, are you sure you're okay with that idea?" you venture.

But there's no way Oscar's going to say anything but a convincing, "Of course!" after the way he saw your eyes immediately light up in hope when Lando explained his idea of the three of you dating.

So you nod, taking that answer, but just ask one more tentative question, "So, you two... you're okay with... you.. you know..."

Before Oscar's brain can even completely comprehend what you're asking, Lando throws his arm around Oscar's shoulders and exclaims, "Of course, Y/n! Me and Osc get on great! Plus, he's not so bad himself-"

And in that moment, you witness Lando lean into kiss Oscar's cheek just as Oscar turns to look at Lando to speak and-

Lando ends up pecking Oscar on his lips.

Oscar's eyes practically pop out of his head, and Lando, to be honest, looks somewhat surprised himself. But you're sure Oscar's brains are about to begin running out his bright red ears as his whole face goes fire hydrant red. "Oh..." he just manages, his hand dragging over his lip.

Lando laughs slightly awkwardly, deciding to pretend he meant to do that. He gives the other driver a pat on his shoulder before saying, "You know, Y/n, you know how flustered Oscar can get with you? Imagine how bad it could be with me. You know, me being so hot and sexy and-"

You giggle nervously and interrupt, "Yeah, yeah, Lando. I get what you're saying."

As the visit at Lando's flat goes on that day, you and Lando loosen up a fair amount at the whole prospect of the three of you dating, but Oscar doesn't seem to budge. Oscar ends up leaving early, so before you go to bed that night, you stop to bring up your nervous concern to Lando: "Lando, I just don't know if Oscar wants to do this... I mean, he doesn't seem comfortable... I just... I think he really doesn't like the idea of dating another guy... I mean, maybe he's- you know, he's not- He doesn't have those feelings for men-"

"Oh, gosh, Y/n, don't worry about that," Lando reassures you and himself, quite honestly. "He'll come around. Oscar just needs time." He adds with a tease, "I mean, who can resist me?"

"You're suggesting you're so hot you can turn straight men gay?" you ask, completely unimpressed, crossing your arms.

"No, no! Trust me, Y/n, Oscar Piastri is not a straight man to even begin with."

"But-"

"Shh. You're probably just tired. Go on, you're eyes are shutting on themselves. Just lean on me."

"But Lando-"

He pecks your lips and murmurs close to your ear, "I've got you here, Y/n. Leave all your worries for tomorrow morning, and until then, I'll deal with the rest."

"Are you sure?"

"Never been more sure," Lando comments, yawning himself as you sigh, resigned, and snuggle into his chest.

You're practically out cold within minutes, which leaves Lando time to sit alone with his thoughts, stroking your hair, worrying and thinking.

What if she's right? What if this just isn't going to work with Oscar?

I thought maybe he'd be more open.

Oh, God. I don't want to hurt either of them, one bit. I love Y/n. I know I do, and I have for so long now.

And Oscar? I'm so fond of him.

Ah, here I go again. Fuck me and my distracted, wandering, boyish heart.

Just like with Carlos. Just like with Daniel.

I don't know I feel it until in one moment, one instance, they smile in a certain way or say a certain joke or do a certain thing in a certain way and-

And suddenly I'm mad in love with yet another person.

Oh, Lando Norris. If only you could date everyone in the world you ever loved.

Then I'd be dating a lot more than just two people. And on the first day of dating two people, it's already a mess.

And it's all my fault.

I guess I'll just have to be the one who fixes it all, then, too.

"Oh, uh, good morning!" you chuckle as you see both Lando's and Oscar's heads turn almost in unison when you enter the room in McLaren HQ. "When did you two arrive in the U.K.?"

"Yesterd-"

"This morning!" Lando beams, throwing his arms around you.

"Oh, alright," you chuckle again. "It's so nice to see both of you..." You smile awkwardly as Lando pulls away and Oscar pats your shoulder when a sudden thought comes into your head.

Is this something the three of us should keep a secret?

Strangely (and stupidly) enough, you forgot to discuss that.

"Hey, uh, it's great you're both here right now. I've got to talk to you about, uhm- some of the media plans we have for you regarding Canada... Let's talk in the hall; don't want to disturb people working in here."

Lando raises his eyebrows as Oscar takes on a perplexed look. Once you're out in the hall together, you lean close and are about to speak when Lando interrupts with a smirk, "So, anyway. What about those... 'media plans' 'regarding Canada'...?"

"Oh, shut it, you!" you grin, realizing how much in just a little over a week away you missed Lando.

Oscar suddenly gently takes your hand by your side and says, "Oh, come on, Lando. Y/n, what did you want to say to us."

And you suddenly realized how much you missed Oscar, too, in only a little over a week.

"Well," you start, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "About this... relationship... Should we... you know, keep it a secret?"

"I... think so," Oscar says carefully, squeezing your hand. "Imagine the media's response. And the fans: the fans would be unbearable."

Lando crosses his arms and whines, "So you're saying I can't even show my affection for you two? Oscar, we're always on camera."

Did Lando just say you two? you can't help but suddenly wonder.

"Maybe you are, but there's ways of avoiding it," Oscar comments, not seeming to hear.

Hm. Maybe I heard wrong.

Because deep down inside, despite your secret desires, you know that Lando and Oscar just agreed to this for you, and have no specific liking for each other.

And that's the thing that's making you nervous that this whole thing has no chance of working out.

"Boys. I agree with Oscar," you sigh. "Lando, I work in marketing and public image type stuff. If anyone knows about this, it's me. And I agree with Osc. It'll do us no good to make this public. Let's just keep it on the down-low."

"Can we at least make a compromise?" Lando ventures.

"Go on," you sigh.

"We can at least still keep acting like we're mad in love with you," Lando laughs. "Because we've been doing that this whole time. Just no one has to know about the dating. I mean, it'll seem off if that suddenly stops."

You bite your lip but murmur, "Fair enough."

Lando grins and comments, "I gotta meeting now. See you two later," giving each your shoulders a pat.

Once Lando is gone, you turn to Oscar and murmur, letting go of his hand to touch his arm gently "Hey, Oscar. Are you alright?"

Your childhood best friend looks to you, a smile immediately forming on his face. But his eyes remain a bit hollow, a bit sad. "Of course I'm alright. Why do you ask?"

"I don't know... You haven't seemed yourself today, I guess is all."

Of course she says that, Oscar thinks. She's the one that knows me best, anyway.

"I don't? Well, I'm fine... I'm sorry if I don't seem it," Oscar responds, attempting to brighten his smile. "Anyways, I've got to be off, too, actually," he says, checking his expensive watch. He leans in to peck your lips as his hand brushes your waist, before waving and offering, "Catch you later, lovely!"

The combination of his affectionate gestures and him calling you 'lovely' kind of makes your head spin.

You lay next to Lando, absently stroking his cheek and chin, feeling his facial hair, as he holds you close, tracing sweet words with his gentle fingers into your back.

You sigh, completely contented in the practically perfect moment. You're in Spain, and it's Saturday night- the Spanish Grand Prix is tomorrow. You ended up taking the last Grand Prix weekend in Canada off, for your spa weekend. Either way, before the race tomorrow, Lando invited you for some snuggles in his hotel room, and there's no way you could say no to that.

So here you are.

But suddenly Lando whispers, "Do you think I should invite Oscar?"

Your heavy eyes seem to immediately open and sharpen at this suggestion. You take a moment to ponder his question, before asking one of your own instead of answering his: "Lando, do you like Oscar?"

"Y/n, of course I like Osc-"

"No, no, Lando. I mean... you know..." you begin carefully, "Do you like Oscar the way you like me?"

There's silence in the room as the air conditioner becomes deafeningly loud suddenly. You can hear a long, slow sigh escape from Lando's lips, into the air, before he slowly says, "Oh, Y/n. I've liked lots of people the way I've liked you in the past."

You smile a little. "I know. You're Lando Norris, for God's sake. Of course you have. But today, right now, in this moment, do you like Oscar the same way you like me?"

Lando presses his forehead into your shoulder before uttering quieter, "If I did, it wouldn't matter."

"Why not?" you prod.

"Because, Y/n, there's no way he likes me in the same way he likes you."

You sigh slowly, feeling a slight pang at hearing those words. You wrap your arms around Lando and pull him closer to you. "What do you like about Oscar...?" you whisper.

"Oh, fuck me, Y/n. Everything. His stupid sense of humour, the way he laughs at all my jokes, the way he looks at me with those brown eyes, the little birth marks all over him, how polite and calm and cool-headed and cooperative and agreeable and smart and sensible and friendly and genuinely good he is. His voice, too! His mentality. Don't fucking tell anyone this, or I will kill you, but I even like the way he's a little bit taller than me. I love his stupid hair and his big smile. His hands... I love them. I love everything about him. I love him, and it's like it all just hit me. I don't know, Y/n. I just don't know."

You lean in and peck his lips before whispering, "Oh, Lando Norris. I love him, too, for all the same reasons. And I love you, too."

"The thing is, Y/n," he barely whispers, "that he'll never, ever love me back."

That feels like a stab to your heart.

You can't imagine how it feels to Lando.

You cuddle him so close, and you hold each other so close, that you can feel his heart pounding in his chest. "Lando," you whisper. "I wish it could all just work out."

"Me, too, Y/n.

"Me too."

"Heyyy, Osc!" you grin, knocking on his open driver's room door. "You feeling good for the race?"

He smiles to see you in the door. "Yeah, I am. Come on in. Thanks for coming to see me, Y/n."

"Of course. It's a treat to see your handsome face."

He beams wider but rolls his eyes, "Oh, yeah?"

"Of course!" you giggle a bit.

"Well, do I get my pre-race hug, then?"

You grin and throw your arms around him, giving him a big kiss on his cheek, "You'll also be getting a post-race hug, too, when you win it!"

"Well, I guess that's always the goal, but we'll see about that." He leans back to look at you, gazing so warmly, so intensely for just a second, into your eyes, before looking away. He opens his mouth to say something, but then quickly closes it.

"What is it, Oscar?" you prod.

"I just wanted to say I love you."

You grin. "Don't ever hesitate to say that again. You don't need to, because I love you, too. And you and Lando better stay safe out there on the track today for me, okay?"

"Oh, alright, and the rest of the grid can all die; they don't matter," he teases.

"Oh, shut it, you!" you laugh, exiting his driver's room with a wave, "Go on and get ready for your race now!"

"Bye!" he laughs.

"Bye, bye, Osc!"

You lay on the bed in Lando's hotel room where you laid just last night, but this time, there's two people laying with you rather than just one.

Oscar is fast asleep on your right side, his right arm draped over your body and his head resting against your shoulder. Lando is on your left, still awake, gently rubbing your left hand absently as he runs his hand through his messy curls.

"Do you think Osc-"

"Ah-" Lando exclaims softly with a little flinch. "I thought you were sleeping already!" he laughs a bit.

You nod, waiting a few seconds before reasking your question, "Do you think Oscar is feeling better about the whole thing?"

"Oh, God, Y/n, I don't know. I think he's just kind of rolling with the punches," Lando sighs deeply. "He just wants you. He'll do anything to have you. Even sleep in the same bed as me."

"Oh... right..." you sigh, wrapping your arm around the sleeping Oscar, pulling him closer to you as you rest your head in the little nook between Lando's cheek and shoulder.

You shut your eyes, trying to force yourself to sleep, but your thoughts are raging, just like Lando's.

Why can't it all just be right? Why does it have to be so difficult? Is this the right thing? Should we give up on it?

Why can't the three of us just be right for each other?

This whole mess is all your fault, Y/n.

Your uncertain heart pounds in your ears, faster and faster, making you nearly go insane.

[kalki-tarot]

10 RANDOM FACTS ABOUT YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE ! 💌

Pick a pile, left to right ♡

Disclaimer — The images I used to select a pile were sourced from Pinterest, I hope the reading will resonate with you. I'm not responsible for any decisions you make in your life from my readings. I'm just a beginner and these readings are just for fun. Take what resonates and leave the rest.

Tap Masterlist for more !

Pile 1

They like to take the lead, might be dominating.

Sets strict boundaries for people.

They're protective, stable and authoritative.

They move on easily.

They might've had a rough and financially poor background or past.

They are a fair person, they don't like injustice for other people.

They like drinking and may have a whole collection of different kind of drinks.

They like to party and socialize a lot.

They constantly move forward in their life, from one place to another. They're very determined and goal oriented.

They might've had a very bad heartbreak in the past in love which made them very emotionally hurt. They are moving forward from this though.

Pile 2

This person dreams of a lot of nightmares.

Very hardworking person, takes up many responsibilities.

They've worked very hard for becoming what they are right now. They still continue to work hard.

This person works in a team, they're most probably leading this team.

They are currently working hard to learn or master a new skill.

This person is detached from the world.

He's thinking and waiting for an offer right now, romantically or career wise.

Very rich financially. On a high position at work.

This person is afraid of failing.

This person has the ability to grow and develop.

Pile 3

Very mischievous and funny.

Very easy going, doesn't stress much about things in life.

Invests a lot for future gains, emotionally or financially.

They are a healer, they help people move forward in their life.

Very mysterious, may have some hidden talents or knowledge most people don't.

This person is a strategic thinker.

Very masculine, dominating and leading energy.

Wants to travel the whole world.

Likes work and personal life balance.

Ambitious.

Pile 4

Works very hard and takes up a lot of responsibility.

Currently moving on from a tough situation in life.

Very emotional and offering in love.

Eyes hold a lot of depth. Very deep and pure soul.

This person's intentions are very pure, they don't wish bad for anyone.

Very practical approach towards life.

This person is surely gonna be wealthy and rich in the future.

This person questions things like god and religion.

This person is going through a divine and spiritual awakening.

Traditional and conventional.

Pile 5

This person is very fast.

This person quickly jumps into romantic relationships.

Very romantic and passionate.

Hopeless romantic.

This might be contradicting but this person now waits and thinks before jumping into romantic relationships.

It's because he's had bad experiences due to being too quick and rushing.

This person is scared to fall in love again due to past heartbreak.

This person just waits now before making any decisions.

Very Masculine

Might be older than you.

Pile 6

Rich background

Fair and logical.

Indecisive sometimes.

Very intuitive and spiritual.

Likes balance in life.

Says the truth no matter what

Old soul, wise

Very prosperous and wealthy

Moving on from something chaotic.

Impulsive sometimes.

[cyb3rtarot]

Pick a Pile: Message From Your Inner Child + How You Can Nurture Them

Disclaimers: choose the pile you feel intuitively drawn to; you can choose more than one! Take what already resonates and leave anything confusing or stressful. Readings are not replacements for professional advice. I used a mix of tarot, oracle, and my intuition.

pile 1->pile 2

pile 3->pile 4

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Pile 1

Message [Justice||nine of hearts rx, king of pentacles, nine of wands rx, three of pentacles rx]: hi pile one! Your inner child wants to express feelings of dissatisfaction or being stifled. Many of you are in a good place financially/with work, at least compared to where you used to be. This came from working very hard without much support from others—maybe even being hindered by others. Other people might look at your life and wish they had it, but your inner child does not seem fulfilled by whatever your position is. I don’t sense ungratefulness, but it does seem like your inner child is more interested in something “deeper” or more meaningful than your physical reality is providing. If you’ve had to claw your way out of hard situations, your inner child seems to be looking for some kind of justice or retribution regarding that. You may feel like you deserve more happiness after what you’ve had to go through, or want people who have done you wrong to be punished.

How you can nurture your inner child [the fool, the emperor, king of pentacles rx, three of swords rx]: a more proactive approach to finding meaning and happiness in your life will nurture your inner child. You might be used to going with the flow—especially if you’re materially comfortable or seeking such a lifestyle. Remember that you have the power to initiate new beginnings; you don’t have to stay the same! Give your inner child space to grow and discover what feels right to them, even if it doesn’t make sense to others. Don’t force yourself to remain in an unhappy spot when there are changes within your grasp. Uncertainty is a necessary part of life. There’s also a big emphasis on balancing your work for outer stability with this search for inner happiness; perhaps some of you unnecessarily overwork yourselves which leaves little time for other things. 

For some, this soul searching may involve letting go of past hurts. I’m not trying to force you to forgive others, but to identify how your current reality has formed as a response to pain, and how you can choose to respond differently.

Extra details: isolation, loneliness. Past betrayals and enemies. Being “self made,” supporting oneself. Not being seen and understood, wearing a facade/mask. Music as solace, singing, pop stars (Ariana Grande again lol?). Balance. Being the tough kid, defending yourself. Paying your own way through school. Aggressiveness. Continuous conflict with colleagues or family, unhappiness at work. Wanting to leave a “good” job, or wanting to “run away” (some of you may be daydreaming about “drastic” action, like suddenly quitting and going on a long trip, far away from everyone you know).

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Pile 2

Message [the star rx, seven of wands rx|| nine of swords, the star, four of pentacles rx]: hi pile two! There is a lot of past hurt and trauma in this pile, and your inner child is highly encouraging healing/shadow work. Your inner child is wanting you to lower some of those internal walls so those uncomfortable emotions and memories can be processed. If you feel you need someone like a professional to help you, that is absolutely okay. Healing is hard, trauma is messy, and the “despair” in this pile seems particularly heavy.

How you can nurture your inner child [two of hearts, the tower rx, queen of pentacles rx, the lovers, six of cups rx]: a major focus for your healing journey is examining how past hurts—especially in relationships or childhood—are projected onto present day relationships. You may have developed certain traits or behaviors to survive the past, but now they block you from experiencing the intimacy your inner child craves. This is not to say you should compromise boundaries, but know that intimacy and vulnerability themselves are not the enemy. Thinking or acting like they are can even be a way of self-blaming, as if you not needing love would have prevented others from being toxic or abusers. Examine how past patterns can lead to current self-sabotaging, and also give yourself grace if you feel like you made a mistake. Learning how to navigate relationships of any kind is hard, and trauma can make it harder! Know your inner insecurities are not reflective of the relationship, how others see you, or the truth. If you do wish to work on some aspect of yourself or your healing journey, it’s very much within your capacity.

Extra details: fruit is significant, maybe nostalgic memories of someone cutting or giving you fruit growing up? A house with a tile or distinctive roof, roof decorations. The quiet/shy kid. Feeling like you’re falling apart. Clumsiness. Alone. A lot of yelling and hurtful words (particularly in the past). Childhood or domestic trauma. Catastrophizing. I feel like a lot of you are in a romantic relationship that is triggering anxiety. Practicing healthy communication with your partner may be one part of the healing work mentioned above. I also feel like a lot of you jumped from a very toxic home into a very toxic relationship as you came of age; a current relationship may be difficult due to this pattern that developed.

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Pile 3

Message [ the hermit, the fool rx|| Queen of cups, the chariot, justice rx, ten of pentacles rx, the hanged man rx, the tower]: hi pile 3, your inner child had a lot to say! You might repress them a lot. They want you to know you are living with old mindsets and approaches that are no longer aligned with you. You have a very large inner, emotional world and self awareness, but you don’t let this shine through to the outside. There’s a big nihilistic vibe of just going through the motions and accepting your lot—even when you’re miserable—and even when there’s changes you can make. An imbalance exists between the energy directed towards your mind versus the outside world. There’s a sense of solitude and a “what’s the point?” approach. However, there’s also a sense of restlessness. Your inner child is feeling stifled by this lifestyle; they want to come out and experience enthusiasm! It seems major changes are present or coming in where this can be addressed.

How you can nurture your inner child [the lovers rx, king of swords, knight of wands rx, the emperor rx]: your inner child is encouraging you to embrace excitement for life. It feels like your nihilistic or apathetic approach functions as self-punishment by denying your desires. You’re aware of which things are not working for you anymore, but you’re avoiding tough conversations or decisions. Your inner child wants to break free and to go after what gives them joy; they do not want their emotions to be judged, repressed, or punished. Some of the self awareness you’ve developed in your inner world can be used to help navigate the disappointments and uncertainties of life. You have to wade past these things to reach the treasures in your journey.

Extra details: restlessness, emo (some of you were in middle school), quiet, hurting, simmering anger, Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day, taking an analytical approach to emotions, singing, not being allowed to express emotions growing up. You might say “perhaps” a lot. Water, wanting to live in or visit a location close to water.

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Pile 4

Message [seven of wands rx, king of hearts, the hermit, strength rx, queen of swords|| queen of pentacles, queen of cups rx, five of cups rx, death rx]: hello pile four! The focus of your message is healing vulnerability. You guys have had to be strong by yourself for a long time. For those working on spirituality, it feels like that was the focus of this period. This “hardened” time can come to a close and give way to a new era where you’re more able to face feelings and express them authentically. Your inner child is pointing to a past experience (or multiple) you can revisit to do healing work. This may be a very disappointing heartbreak in a past relationship (of any kind). You might have had to end it with someone who was very attached to you and make that first “hurtful” move so you both could move on and heal. Or, you became disillusioned from lack of emotional fulfillment. Most of you have already done a lot of healing/shadow work and reached a more stable place with your inner sense of security. But, there’s difficulty translating this into being vulnerable with others. Due to the amount of emotional work you had to do, you’re leaning into logic and practicality when there needs to be a balance with emotion. Maybe you can easily identify and scrutinize emotions, but you default to this mental approach to avoid actually feeling it or confronting what you’ve repressed—especially if others’ reactions to your emotions have been disappointing. Protecting yourself is necessary and so is analyzing emotion. But sometimes feelings just need to pass through! We can only “think” our way so far into understanding life lessons. Vulnerability with ourselves—and knowing healthy ways to be vulnerable with others—are both healing.

How you can nurture your inner child [the hierophant rx, king of wands, princess of wands, page of cups rx, the devil rx]: you’ve done a lot of  self-discovery and learning lessons on purpose. This has made space for beautiful growth—however, there’s an emphasis on being open to developing with other people, too. You may want to continue working on yourself in isolation, but some growth and self-knowledge can only be discovered through others. You may repress your inner child’s desire for connection—forcing yourself to be independent. This seems comfortable for you, but not necessarily fulfilling. You may not know where to start with allowing others inside your world. This pile is stuck in the middle of not wanting to deal with toxic BS and yearning for something new + authentic. You may really have to push yourself to leave your comfort zone when it comes to others, and remember that your past experiences don’t define every experience you could have. I’m not suggesting to do things that feel wrong to you, but I am suggesting to notice where you squash your curiosity towards others as a defense mechanism. If you remain true to the things you’ve learned during this time, you’ll be much more adept at spotting insincere people and setting boundaries. And, you’ll be equipped for the inevitable challenges that occur when we get closer to others. These aren’t necessarily bad challenges, but for someone who has learned to love being alone, the metaphorical social “dance” can seem daunting. People are lessons, but not everyone is going to be a hard lesson.

Extra details [TW abuse, self harm, suicide mention]: using spirituality as a reason to not feel (example, not letting yourself feel disappointed because “that’s how it was meant to be”), likes to rhyme or make puns a lot, tendency towards being nonchalant/apathetic, trying to “think” emotions away, not knowing how to stop being so independent. Spiritual, wise, eccentric/enigmatic, self-assured. “Nice” relationships but very few “deep” relationships. Wanting to be friendly but getting alarmed when someone want to be friendly back lol. May have been in a relationship with a very imbalanced power dynamic; someone may have had the power to punish you? In & out the hospital as a child or a very big medical incident. Working in medical (specifically getting nursing) or as a coach, trainer. Surgeries & surgical scars (especially emergency surgery to save your life), medical implants & devices, physically disabled. SH scars. Past attempt on one’s life. Unwilling to feel emotion in fear of getting swept away by them. Stoic on the outside, emotional inside. Always trying to “solve” your emotions

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[theleotarot]

The Personality Of Your Future Spouse - Tarot Reading ❤️

Choose the image that you feel most drawn to… The piles are in order from Pile 1, Pile 2, and Pile 3.

Before you begin reading your pile, I just want to ask you that after you’re done reading, can you please give me feedback if you enjoyed your reading or not through my ask box… Please be kind though! I am still a beginner at tarot reading, so your input will be very much appreciated! Thank you, and you may carry on to your reading now!

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Pile 1

(Tarot cards: The Emperor, Knight of Wands, The Lovers, The Hanged Man, & at the back of the deck The Chariot)

There are lots of fire energy, some of water energy, and a bit of air energy. Your future spouse may have these signs in their chart. I see your future spouse as someone who is a natural leader, commanding, authoritative, extroverted, and very confident as an individual. They enjoy orderliness and leadership. This is someone who you can look up to for advice, and they aren’t afraid of showing you tough love when they need to. I can see your future spouse working in a career field that they have authority over. They can work in the military, law enforcement fields, be the CEO of a company, or any type of career field that they hold the power. I can also see that your future spouse is a very outdoorsy person! They may enjoy going out on hikes, swimming, skiing, biking, and all fun activities! Pile 1, if you love to travel, you will be so happy because this person loves to travel as well. They are so active and courageous, they are willing to do any type of exploring you want to do. When it comes to dating or talking with people, I can see that your future spouse is a flirtatious and passionate charmer. They may be the type of person to talk around a lot for fun, but when it comes to someone who they feel is the right person for them, they take them extremely seriously. Your future spouse is in love with love itself. This is why they aren’t afraid of pursuing in a partner. They are a person who is very humorous, talkative, and romantic, and that’s why people around them enjoy their presence so much. I can also see that when your future spouse is having a disagreement with someone or when they have trouble in their lives, they are able to look at things from a different viewpoint, and act fairly on it. They want to keep the balance of peace in their lives. Overall, pile 1, your future spouse’s personality is a fierce, passionate, loving, and understanding individual. They are a person who makes people feel safe, secure, and that everything is under control. They also see the good in everyone even when they do encounter with people who might have a negative reputation, but this is because they are a great listener to different viewpoints and always open to understanding the other side of arguments. (Pile 1, your future spouse is so fun, adventurous, confident, and passionate! These are definitely amazing traits that they have! You are all very fortunate)!

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Pile 2

(Tarot cards: 4 of Swords, 2 of Pentacles, 8 of Pentacles, 9 of Pentacles, & at the back of the deck The Magician)

There are lots of earth energy and some air energy here. Your future spouse may have these elements in their chart. The first traits I see that your future spouse has is that they are a homebody and more on the introverted side. They are a very calm person who dislikes drama, prefers comfort more than style, and has an excellent self-care routine. I can see that they always try to get in a good night’s sleep, does skin care routines, keeps their home organized, and makes sure that they are cleaned up as a person. They may enjoy doing lots of meditation or yoga to maintain the peace in their life. Your future spouse has also mastered the definition of self-love and independence. They don’t rely on a romantic partner to feel complete, they already know that they are worthy of their life while being by themselves only. They are also an extremely hardworking individual, and I can see that they may take their education or job very seriously. Regardless if people are being unsupportive of them, they continue to strive for achievements. They accomplish their goals according to their terms, and they don’t let negative comments interrupt their success. I can see that they are also very abundant and satisfied with their money income. To sum it up, your future spouse feels adequate about who they are and what they have accomplished in life. Your future spouse is excellent at balancing the different areas in life. Whether it be making time to spend with family versus working very often in their job, or maintaining money while having to pay bills, your future spouse knows how to keep the balance in their life. For career, I can see that your future spouse may work in a quiet environment like the library, secluded area in a building, or work from home. If they don’t work in a quiet environment, then I can see that they may work as being a writer, artist, an advocate, or they can work in marketing. Pile 2, overall, your future spouse is a very calm, peaceful, determined, hardworking, balanced, organized, and independent individual that is always on the go to improve themselves. They are always on the go to create more accomplishments. They don’t need to show off or please anyone, the only person that they are trying to make happy is themselves. As long as they believe in themselves and have their own approval, they can make magic happen in any area they wish to. (I’m so happy for you all Pile 2!! To have a partner who loves themselves AND is very determined in their work is rare to have! This is wonderful for you all <3).

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Pile 3

(Tarot cards: 9 of Pentacles, 2 of Wands, Queen of Pentacles, 7 of Cups, & at the back of the deck The Fool)

There is a mix of all the elements of earth, fire, water, and air energy here. Your future spouse may have these signs in their chart. I can see that your future spouse is a nurturing and selfless individual. They can even have the traits of an ideal “parent type.” They are always making sure that others around them feel cared and loved. Whether it be them donating money to charity, babysitting children, or doing volunteer work for the community, they always want to give selflessly out to people in all ways. I also see that your future spouse enjoys taking care of their body! They eat delicious foods while also eating healthy foods, and they do outdoor activities such as walking and hiking to keep up their physical health. I can also see that they may play an instrument or music plays a big role in their life. For career, I can see them working as a fashion designer, baker, the art scene, or they can work in the entertainment industry. They are also very abundant with money, and they never show it off or think of themselves as more superior than anyone else. Your future spouse’s aura is more relaxing and peaceful because they have an outstanding amount of self-acceptance and self-love. They feel very satisfied with their personal life areas as well as their career and money. Although your future spouse is satisfied with who they are, I can see that they have many ideas and dreams that want to make come true. They might actually have too many goals or tasks that many of them aren’t fulfilled yet. I can see them as someone who feels like they’re all over the place. Maybe one moment they want to go to school to deepen their education, but another moment they want to move out of the city to explore more with their life. I see your future spouse as someone who has a lot of dreams at hand, and this is what makes them a very organized person in planning. With every goal they have in mind and whatever they do, they are always steps ahead with planning. They are very courageous and exploring when they want to take action, but they are never too quick and naive. Overall, your future spouse displays a mature individual with young energy as well. Their life is content with money and success, but they also want to explore more because that’s who they are as a person! They always strive for more and want to explore as much as they can, and they do this through planning and taking risks. (Pile 3, this is great for you! It’s a great balance that your future spouse is mature but still has a young energy to them! Also, when I say that they may feel “all over the place” it’s not a bad thing because it just means that they are very exploring! It’s a great thing that they have a lot of desires actually)!

[psychelis-new]

pick a pile: "How you're changing and how to find mental peace at this moment"

take a breath and choose the photo or number that calls you the most to find out what you may be working on or doing in order to feel more at peace with growing and changing and all the confusion and instability it brings. it is supposed to help you see better how you're reaching the latest best version of yourself. this reading was suggested by an Anon (thank you) and the song "teenage dream" by olivia rodrigo.

don’t take the reading too seriously. only take what resonates with you and leave the rest. if you're not called by any pile, let this reading slid as it may not hold messages for you. if you're called by more than one pile, there may be messages in each of those piles. remember that is a general reading and some things may not resonate with you. energies can change and readings are based on present ones (as you read); you're always in charge of your life. readings do not substitute real life experience nor professionals/doctors advices.

(photos found on unsplash)

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pile 1

Pile 1 you are probably changing something about yourself, very likely how you see yourself and how you let others see you. You maybe felt restricted somehow or unsafe in certain situations, but now you're looking at them under a different perspective. It feels like you're being born again. In general, it seems like you're healing (and probably you've been working a lot already on yourself) a side of you, especially your heart/relationships. You're balancing the pain and realizing what you really deserve for you. You're closing with a cycle of huge distress and discomfort in relation with others and how you got used to be treated by them. You're working on your self worth successfully. Maybe you're also bringing closure to a hurtful past relationship of any type (take your time with that, and remember to give yourself breaks and do things for yourself and try new stuff as well if/when you feel like). You're probably slowly working on standing your ground, on communicating your needs and on letting yourself be seen with no fear. You're balancing your thoughts and actions, especially when it comes to letting others know where you stand. You're focusing on healing your heart and on giving yourself and your own needs the right amount of attention.

Keep talking and being yourself with others. Sure, let them know where you stand, but remind yourself that too strict boundaries (despite understandable, seen what you had to go through: it takes time and some mistakes to find a new positive balance in communication and relationships) may be counterproductive. To find your people, the ones that love you and support you and help you when you need them to, you also need to let them in and let them see you. You need to tell them about yourself and your needs. Especially tell them if you need time to get adjusted with new situations. Don't be afraid of being judged, it won't happen again: people will love you and show the same affection you show them. Be curious about them too, about their passions and fears, about their lives and details (ofc maybe do not start off with deep stuff or act like a creep but... yeah try to find a path that may take you there, to a deeper and healthier relationship). Give but remember to receive too. Relationships need to be balanced also when it comes to how we show interest in the other: especially if you've been through tough relationships you may now be trying to *unconsciously* test others and how much they care for you by always waiting for them to take decisions and include you or show interest in you, but if you don't ever show them your interest in them or ask for their support or propose something first, they may just get bored and leave. Or they may consider you too independent and stop showing interest in you, since you can do everything on your own (that's the actual message you send them everytime you say you're fine and nothing's wrong). You're not a burden for being human and needing others: don't deprive your friends/people from the joy of helping you (the same joy you may feel when helping them). And ofc it's fine to be reserved (you're trying to save yourself from experiencing pain again), but too much of it can be damaging as well and actually bring more pain too.

song: youngblood | 5sos

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pile 2

I'm not sure you're aware that you're changing or in what ways. I think you may just feel something is different but you cannot really see how cause everything actually feels the same as usual. Maybe you have only gained a different perspective on something or maybe you've just outgrown something, a situation or even someone (maybe your old self too). It's no problem anyway: the more we change, the less we're aware we do, so keep staying there: you're probably just being made ready for something else and right now you need to just wait and recover (change takes away a lot of energy). I think you're also more confident in you, more aware of what's going on around you, and even more inside of you. Maybe you're also starting something new, a new endeavour, or new studies or a new hobby and it's helping you gaining more confidence too. Maybe it's a new way of living, a new workout routine or a new diet, or doing therapy/taking care of your mental/spiritual health. You're taking good care of you, you're being more self focused and more in tune with yourself. You're also trying to make your wishes come true in some ways, showing your inner child as well that they can rely on you and that you can help them and yourself. You're feeling bolder and rsponsible of your own life and happiness, and of where you want to go.

Not sure you really need to find mental peace, but maybe you do anyway. There may still be moments of uncertainty, of feeling lost and not knowing where you're actually going despite deep down you know you're in charge of it. Keep staying and checking inside of you, taking care of you, connecting and talking with you. Also with your inner child. Let them help you sort out things from the past that you still need to heal (if you do and when you do, go at your pace). Try to not let the pain and self doubt, the uncertainty and anxiety distract you and make you spiral. It's understandable ofc, but it's something you have the power to deal with (take a break to distract from the possible panic attack and then, when you feel, get back to that trigger/emotion and check the reasons or what it wants to show you. If you need, ask for guidance: don't do it alone if it's too much). Be honest about your feelings and emotions, forgive yourself cause you did what you could and if you can/need to, forgive others too: many times people try to give us what they imagine we may need but they just do it in a way that's not the one we actually need (cause they either cannot give in any other way or cause of their own traumas). Many times we feel left out cause we expect from others things that they cannot give us or that they don't know we need in a certain way: communicate, ask. And if they cannot give what you need in the way you need, get it from other people and from yourself too. And communicate with your higher self and let them guide you as well. Give to yourself first and foremost: show you can have what you want in the way you want. Others will follow your guidelines.

song: halo | beyoncé

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pile 3

You're probably starting a new cycle in your life. Even if now you cannot really see it all, I do think you can already feel it coming in whatever way (different for all of you) and even get infos about it: dreams, signs, symbols... I think things are going to take a good turn and whether you're feeling more relaxed or "hyped" about it, you can indeed feel positive about it and like, sit in the passenger seat and let things unfold. Whatever goal you are trying to reach, it will unfold in the best way for you. Set your goals, write or meditate/pray about them. I think your Guides want to give you back or give you some type of recognition for what you have done, be it self work or anything else. There's still a hint of surprise for you, so just let it all be without trying to control the whole process. Congrats pile 3! "You'll shine the brightest"

This seems like a huge change from the past, and it may require you to take a few more steps in the unknown and heal some more parts of you before the new cycle can actually start. Especially, you may need to put some light over your emotions and change how you deal with them. There may still be demons hidden inside of you, espcially yelling in your mind, trying to cloud your thoughts/judgement and block you from moving forward towards your dreams. Remind yourself those are still parts of you that need lot of love and appreciation. Do not let them scare you, but talk with them kindly. Be compassionate and supportive of yourself in the meantime: changes are never easy to go through, and they may get scary; even if you're advised you can let go, your mind may think otherwise out of past/old mental patterns. Find ways to ground yourself, maybe talk with people you know you can trust. Stay open to discover different truths while letting in your darkest sides too (do not be scared of them). Keep working on you and on your healing and remember that healing doesn't mean absence of triggers but knowing how to react to them properly without letting them take you over and block you. Not to mention that triggers may get tougher the closer we get to closing a cycle so be patient with the process but in particular with yourself. Do not isolate, especially not from your Guides. Remember to get a new/different result sometimes we need to do something new/different. Do not let this "new/different" scare you and block you. And also do not let the past and how much pain still brings you (and your inner child), block you as well. You may feel tired and in need of a way out especially when things get particularly tough and stressful: just be patient please and don't give up. You'll get there, trust that you will make it. Please hold on strong for now and take care of you if things get too heavy, give yourself time to unwind (or nap).

song: feel good inc. | gorillaz

[lullabyalikpoptarot]

Stray Kids as a Boyfriend

Bangchan (6 of Cups/Yang) He is kind of cute! He will be an emotional boyfriend, very playful, idealistic and a bit childlike. He is a very active boyfriend. His childhood may play a role in how he deals with relationships. He is all about action as a boyfriend. He is overall a pretty positive person as a boyfriend. There could be some immaturity here though. He would be expressive and try to show his more authentic self in relationships as a boyfriend. I do think he will try to focus more on the positive, rather than addressing on the negatives in the relationships though, which can run into problems in the long run. He may not be too realistic in love and just idealize or romanticize it a bit too much, rather than face the difficult realities of it.

Lee Know (3 of Pentacles/Cancer) He seems he will be able to balance career and home life as a boyfriend. He will be practical but yet emotional. He will provide a loving space for his partner, a place of comfort. He may want to build a family rather quickly, or his intention will be to do that, so I can see him taking relationships seriously. He seems to be all about teamwork, also I feel he would like his partner's opinion on his work matters. He would want to work and collaborate with his partner. He would enjoy sharing what he has done at work with his partner. The Tarot card is just giving me, hey look what I did at work vibe lol He would also be very nurturing and caring to his partner and create a safe space for his partner. Another cute one.

Changbin (5 of Cups/Water) This boy would be crazy emotional in relationships as a boyfriend. He may be a bit dramatic and make a big deal out of nothing though or make things bigger than it should be. I just see him being disappointed a lot as a boyfriend, maybe due to him always having high expectations of his partner and them not meeting it. I just get like a drama king. But he is an emotional and intuitive boyfriend, and he will be very understanding of his partner. I think he will be able to bring the emotions and provide emotional support for his partner. But he can be a half glass empty type a guy and may look at the negatives, rather than the positives, so there is that. I also get he can be a huge teddy bear, so tough on the outside, sweet and emotional on the inside.

Hyujin (4 of Pentacles/Chiron) Ya'll who hurt this man? I sense he may have been cheating on in the past, or his possessive nature caused problems for him in relationships. As a boyfriend he will be possessive and protective, not really in a crazy toxic way, because this isn't the devil card, but leaning towards that. He may see his partner as his possession and want to know where they are at or who they are talking to all the time, or most of the time. This Chiron card gives me he may have been hurt by a past partner and that may be why he is this way in his present or future relationships, but this is something he needs to work on healing, because if he doesn't his possessive nature will create problems for his relationships going forward.

Han (10 of Wands/House 2) I think he may just find relationships to burdensome right now. I believe he rather focus on making money and building his wealth and career. It is like he already has too much on his plate to focus on being a boyfriend to someone. As a boyfriend he may be someone who carries the burden and tries to do too much or put too much pressure on himself. He enjoys having financial security, so he may want to have that before steeping into a relationship. As a boyfriend material wealth, possessions and security will be very important to him.

Felix (Knight of Pentacles/Virgo) Well, no surprise here, he is a Virgo lol I love how straight forward he is. So, in love he will be slow and patient. He will not rush into relationships too quickly. He will be a loyal and dependable boyfriend, a very patient boyfriend. He will take things slow. He will be all about gift giving or being of service to his partner. I can actually see him cooking for his partner, so random, but okay. Just enjoying doing things for his partner. He would probably like to do activities with his partner, like bike riding with them, weird specific things popping up lol as a boyfriend he is very supportive and practical. I can see him giving lots of practical advice to his partner. He can be emotional as a boyfriend, but not sure you will get deep emotions from him. He will be a very stable boyfriend though. The type to be in it for the long run. I don't see too much excitement. He will be a chill boyfriend. I won't say he will never be fun and adventurous, but he seems more on the chill side.

Seungmin (King of Cups/The Sun) Love these cards. Now in a boyfriend reading the KOC is one of two of the best cards to get, so he will be a very good boyfriend from what I see, a very loving, understanding and compassionate boyfriend. He will always be there to give his partner support and love when need be. He is emotional, but very stable with it, he will be able to keep his cool and barely, if ever get overwhelmed or lash out. Emotional stability is important in relationships, and he has it. What you see is what you get from him. He is all about self-expression in love. He will be a positive and upbeat boyfriend. I see him encouraging his partner a lot as well. Overall, his vibe is really good.

I.N (2 of Cups/South Node) This boy is so cute I swear. He got another one of the best cards to get as a boyfriend. He will be emotionally invested and connected with his partner as a boyfriend. The boy is looking for his other half in love, someone to build a bond with and share a love together. He will definitely be emotionally involved as a boyfriend. I wonder if he has a Venus in Pisces, because this does not give me Aquarius vibes. Now with this South node, there may be a past relationship or a present one he may need to let go of and release. Now I can see if he has Pisces energy, that could be hard to do, they struggle to let go. But I can also see that him in relationships may be able to release parts of himself that he may need to let go. I think as a boyfriend a relationship could be therapeutic for him.

I will say when it comes to their love lives or when I talk about them personally, they seem to be a bit chattier lol Anyway, this group seems to have the healthiest mindset when it comes to being a boyfriend overall from the groups I have done.

[anthonys237thfreckle]

Do you have any Javi headcanons? (Just about him as a character)

Javier ‘Javi’ Rivera - Headcanons

TW: mentions of death and mild bullying

🌪- Javi def grew up being called ‘Javier’ a lot in elementary school. He only transitioned to the nickname ‘Javi’ in late middle school/ high school.

🌪- Speaking of growing up, his freckles were made fun of, so he grew up being insecure about them. He doesn’t give a shit now, though, since the ladies liked it in college

🌪- He was always a fun kid to be around - very smiley when he was a young boy. In his teen years, he started discovering himself more, and in high school hooked up with both guys and girls.

🌪- He probably had his bi awakening through watching a movie and finding a male character hot, then being jealous of the female love interest.

🌪- Of course he was a little anxious about coming out, but he didn’t really care as much what people thought of him. If they asked, he’d tell them but he wouldn’t go around announcing to the school he’s bi or whatever.

🌪- He never really found an interest in subjects like art or music in school. He was really good in science, obviously. In elementary, his favourite topic was the water cycle.

🌪- In college, he was surprisingly good at what he did. He put a lot of effort into coursework AND balanced his hookups.

🌪- He found his group of friends: Jeb, Kate, Addy and Praveen - and he fit right in. The perfect balance of nerdy, ambitious and troublemaking.

🌪- His best assets in college were his holy trinity - hair, freckles and body. He did work out a lot in high school and maintained his figure in college, so that made him attractive. Those god-damned freckles made him eye catching and unforgettable, and his hair - a brown mop of curls, shoulder length and he rarely ever had a bad hair day (and as someone with curls myself, i need his routine.)

🌪- Javi’s lively personality was mostly squandered by two major events in his life. The EF5 accompanied by the loss of his friends and joining the military.

🌪- He still holds onto the grief of not being able to guide them through the storm, of being picked by the universe to live when three of his best friends died.

🌪- Part of him died too that day.

🌪- The military gave him a tough skin. Lots of physical training and whatnot - he still got to pursue and use his knowledge in meteorology, but more professional and safe this time.

🌪- To him it doesn’t feel the same.

🌪- Once he was done with the military, he started dating Scott mostly because he just wanted to feel something, and Scott made him feel things. However, the two of them didn’t mix and split up.

🌪- He’s a logical thinker, but under the influence of emotions, he’ll say whatever’s on his mind, no matter how hurtful it can be.

🌪- That’s why he’s a little afraid to get too riled up or to let his emotions free because he’s afraid of losing someone from saying something shitty.

🌪- However, after Kate talked some sense into him, he found a new purpose in life - to help people in danger. To save lives and communities, and he’s determined not to let anyone suffer the same fate as his friends on his watch.

[enigma-the-mysterious]

AITA for trying to accomplish my father's dreams and hurting my best friend in the process?

Alright, here we go. So, I (30M) have been working on a pretty intense task for the last few years. I made a promise to someone very dear to me—my father, to be exact—that I would do whatever it takes to accomplish it. To do this, I had to take some drastic steps. We’re talking undercover stuff, working within a system that’s more rotten than an overripe jackfruit, all to get closer to taking down the enemy from the inside.

To accomplish this mission, I needed a special promotion. I have been putting myself through hell and back, but those racist assholes at higher up kept passing over me to promote Mediocre White Dude #57. Then a few months ago, I finally, FINALLY made some solid progress when my boss's wife guaranteed me the promotion if I could track down and arrest some anonymous dude who was proving to be a security issue for my boss. Pretty straightforward, right?

Now here’s the issue. At about the same time a few months ago, I met this guy; let’s call him A (26M) for now. My work-life balance had honestly been, well, shitty to say the least, thanks to my father's mission, and I barely had the time to socialize and make any meaningful connections in the city I moved in. Meeting with A had been a chance encounter too. Long story short, we clicked instantly and became fast friends. He is a great guy all around— smart, funny, passionate, good natured, kind, helpful— just about everything you can possibly wish for in a friend (although he could be a little naive sometimes).

But here’s the kicker: a few days earlier, I found out that A has been lying to me about... basically EVERYTHING! ALL this time. He is not from the city; the people he claimed to be his family are not even related to him. Even his name isn't A, it's B! But what's worse is that he is exactly the guy I was supposed to arrest. And he was on a mission too. Except his mission was not targeting my boss, it was to rescue someone— his sister M (9F) to be exact— my boss and his wife had kidnapped and enslaved (long story). Yup, that’s right, we were on opposite sides without even realizing it.

Things escalated quickly. I... well… I had to make a choice. I chose to betray him to keep up my own cover and stick with my father's mission. And yeah, it was brutal— there was a literal fight to the death involved. I tried to convince him at first to surrender without fighting, but of course B didn't listen and refused to back down. I can’t even begin to explain how much it hurt to turn on someone I came to respect, even love…. uhh…. like a brother, of course.

And then, to rub salt to the wound, once I arrested him, my boss (FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK DIE BITCH) ordered me to flog B publicly till he fell to his knees and begged for mercy. Yeah, those were his exact words, that bastard! I felt like I had no choice, so I did what I was told. And it was one of the worst days of my life. I kept asking B to kneel so I could end the torture, but he is one stubborn and tough motherfucker and decided he would rather suffer through a public torture session than kneel. My dickface boss and his bitch wife weren't satisfied with how little blood I was drawing out of B, so they kept escalating the torture until B couldn't take it anymore and fell unconscious.

I ended up hurting him so badly, both physically and emotionally. It is fucking me up, honestly. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't even get out of my bed right now. I honestly feel like dying.

So, AITA for betraying and hurting my best friend to accomplish my father's mission? I did what I thought was necessary to save countless lives, but I can’t shake the feeling that maybe I went too far.

Edit: No, B did not know that I worked for the people who kidnapped his sister. He did not befriend me to take advantage of my position, as some of you have been implying. He did not, I repeat, he did NOT betray me. If anyone has betrayed and wronged him, it's me!

Edit 2: No, I didn't tell B my real intentions and my father's mission. Didn't you read the post? I am working UNDERCOVER!

[silica]

Tarot • pick a pile • general reading

Something positive about yourself that you’re not appreciated fully

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

Pile 1

Pile 2

Pile 3

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

Please pick the image or pile that you feel drawn to the most!

Pile 1

Practical minded, strong mature feminine energy, emotional connection and duality. You know how to take care of yourself and others.

Pile 1, I believe you have more balance within yourself than you realise. I get the vibe that you may consider yourself as more polarised in terms of your personality traits and capabilities than you actually are. You’re got a positive sense of duality within your energy. Not ignorant of your emotions regarding things but ultimately very practical minded. Perhaps paying more mind to all your aspects will make you feel more whole in a way. As this variety in your traits is something you’ve not fully appreciated yet. You’re also a lot better at fostering connections with others than you realise.

Pile 2

Strong emotional fortitude. A sense of grounded optimism and confidence. Talented and competent.

Pile 2, I feel like you don’t appreciate how solid your ability to lock in and get the things done that need to be done is. You have a good sense of optimism to you, and it’s not a naive or toxic kind, you have a very real grasp of yourself and how to consider things in a positive manner. ‘The glass may be half full right now, but I will work to make sure it becomes filled.’ You’re competent at what you do and I hope you realise that. You’re also a lot better at balancing your emotional processing than you realise. Even when things get tough, you persevere, stand firm and still continue onwards. Steady growth wins the race.

Pile 3

Visionary, optimistic and enthusiasm. Looking past the veil. Unwavering love of your life. Strong direction and hopes.

Pile 3, you’re quite the optimist. You look ahead towards the brighter things in life and don’t loose sight of your hopes and aspirations. There is an unwavering hope in you, it still stands strong no matter what has happened to you before. You’re willing to grow and try again even after hardships. You see past the darkness of life even when it seems all encompassing. I fear you may have diminished this aspect of yourself to become more conscious of other people around you, who may tend towards more pessimistic attitudes. A little realism is helpful, but wanting to aim for the best possible outcome is nowhere near foolish. You’re better at making decisions than you realise, I feel you may second guess yourself a lot, and the cards want to remind you that you’re in good hands: your own.

[m4rried2the-moon]

⁽ 𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘢 𝘱𝘪𝘤 ⁾ 𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 & 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘢𝘱 𝘴𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯

a look at what’s coming your way for capricorn season 🪄🚪⌛️💡

please only take what resonates, listen to your intuition closely. don’t second guess that gut feeling!

pile 1 - blessings: king of pentacles, five of cups, four of coins, eight of swords. lessons: seven of pentacles, six of wands, four of cups, page of wands.

a tough and brave energy is radiating from you this capricorn season, pile one. i’m seeing that whatever you were dealing with before this energy shift is less intimidating now, as if you realize that it’s not as scary as it seemed in the first place. your blessings are a sense of personal power, a confidence to overcome what seemed impossible before.

whether that be going after a career, studying a field or just a project you’ve had your sights on for a while but didn’t quite have the motivation? your blessing will be that final burst of strength to crack the cocoon so you can fly.

you’re excited aren’t you, pile one? as you should be. life looks like it’s taking a turn for the best, your applied efforts being met with recognition (maybe even that boost of self esteem/self recognition).

overall, your lesson this season is that things aren’t as bleak they seemed, your inner and outer world getting brighter and easier.

pile 2 - blessings: six of pentacles, seven of cups, ten of wands, the fool/king of swords. lessons: three of swords, seven of coins, ten of pentacles, four of swords.

ready for rest aren’t we, pile two? well please be assured, your blessings for this capricorn season is the balance of relief where you may have been overworking yourself (physically, mentally, emotionally). you’ve been doing a great deal of inner work haven’t you, pile two? it’s okay to allow yourself to celebrate, you’re in the final stretch.

you seem to be energetically wedged right between capricorn and their watery cousin, cancer during this season. but do remember that cancers tarot card is the chariot of completion and victory through righteous willpower. and capricorn is associated with the devil tarot card which often represents systems of power, self destruction and control.

with that being said, your lesson is embracing this more powerful cancerian energy of moving past that heartbreak of feeling trapped by your circumstances or delays and trusting you’ll succeed at what you’ve worked hard at.

embrace your self-understanding and know you’re headed in the right direction, pile two! your lesson is knowing your effort will never be fruitless if you’ve given it your all.

pile 3 - blessings: king of swords, page of swords, two of cups, eight of swords. lessons: nine of swords, three of cups, queen of cups, nine of cups.

looking sharp, pile three! you’re being blessed with an ardent venture in one way or another. there could even be something specific here that you may have been pursuing already but there is incoming information about it- a development of some kind that will reveal its full potential and make you even more sure about it.

almost as if you have already been fulfilling that capricious energy and now is the time where you can actually cut to the bone of your efforts.

it’s a very exciting and assured energy that is coming from you. you are ready but i feel that you may not even realize the actual magnitude of this pursuit! like you’re already like ‘yeah! i’m gonna do this, and this, and this-!’ and then it finally comes and you’re like ‘oh wow, that’s so much more than i expected’ in the best way possible.

overall, the lesson here is that you deserve the stuff you’ve been wanting. not only that, it looks like it’s finally a chance to actually relax this year (and the upcoming). like, this feels like the biggest christmas present you’ve ever received, pile three. i mean seriously, i’m seeing fun and abundance that will genuinely blow your mind lol. stay excited and focused, and expect the best, love!

that’s it for now, hope this helped and you got everything you needed! & please remember to like/reblog!

[unsolicitedadvicecatlady]

Negotiating with a terrorist

Some time ago I was involved in a hostage negotiation. The negotiation lasted 218 days before we reached a successful outcome. That was one of the hardest 7 months of my life. I got a lot of grey hairs, and I learned a little about human behavior. Now that there's been some distance between those events and the present, I'd like to share some of what I learned.

Growing up, I remember hearing "we don't negotiate with terrorists." Unfortunately, it's something I had to learn how to do. I'm not an expert, by far. There are people out there with a lot more experience in these types of high-stakes negotiations, however, this is some of the information that I used to get to an acceptable resolution, and this blog is an outlet that I use to share my unsolicited advice.

First, you have to stop thinking "it's us vs. them." You have to change your mindset into thinking about this as a collaborative effort. They're not the enemy, they are your counterpart. You're spinning in different directions, but you still need to work together with them here.

Next, take your best guess at your counterpart's perspective. Are they spouting a bunch of bullshit about how they're the real victim here? How life owes them? How somebody owes them? Get into their shoes to get into their head. It's not that you're buying their rhetoric, but you want them to think that you're looking out for their best interests, otherwise, they're not going to listen to a word you have to say.

Build rapport with them. Repeat back to them the last few words of what they just said, using an upwards inflection to indicate benign curiosity, or a downwards inflection to indicate they can elaborate because they haven't sold you on this idea, yet. The "yet" is the operative word. Give them the sense that you're really listening to understand, not to respond.

Use phrases like: "it sounds like," "it looks like," "it feels like," and reassure them that you are listening to what they're saying. For example, "it sounds like you're pretty tired of not being heard. Tell me, what's really going on?" or "it looks like you want to be taken seriously here. You've got my attention." or "it feels like you're in a really tough spot here. What do you need right now?"

You're not saying this because you're such a nice person, you are, but you're talking to a sociopath, you've gotta do a little acting. A lot of acting. You want to use your friendly, upbeat voice, like you're talking to a good buddy. That slows their brainwaves down and makes them feel safe. If you want to speed their brainwaves up and knock them off balance, talk fast and aggressively. If you want them to cool back off then use a slow cadence, deep tone, nice and easy, real slow.

Express a real interest in their point of view. Get them talking about all the absolute trash propaganda and their own narrative. Ramp up their sense of safety by respectfully acknowledging their emotions behind what they're saying. Paraphrase a little, let them know you're really here to listen to them. If they're holding back, prime them by guessing at what they're thinking and feeling. Learn to see suffering first.

Agree with them as much as you can. This might sound counterintuitive, but you've got to make them feel like you're really looking out for their best interests, so when they say something that you can agree with, focus on that.

Understand the difference between "You're right" and "That's right." "You're right" means "Shut up, please; I'm going to do what I like anyway." While "That's right" means "I now know that you understand where I'm coming from, and I agree with what you're saying."

Ask "no" oriented questions. People are more comfortable answering a question with "no" than they are with "yes." So, rephrase all of your questions that you want a "yes" to so that the answer you want is "no."

Let your own "no" out gently and only in teaspoonfuls. They're operating with a very self-centered mindset, so when you tell them "No" it's going to be like a slap in the face to them. Instead, ask "How am I supposed to do that?" They might tell you exactly how you're supposed to do that. So, say something like "It sounds like you've really thought this through. I'm sorry. I'm afraid that's just not going to be possible from my end." Compliment their intelligence and be apologetic. This person is an egomaniac, they'll eat that garbage for breakfast.

Get them to a point of cognitive overload by asking a rapid series of "how" and "what" questions. Any more than five and they'll be mentally exhausted. This can cause agitation, so be tactful of when you use this.

When negotiating you can't be so set on what you want that you wouldn't take something even better. Don't fixate on one outcome. Be open to the possibility that your best idea isn't actually the best idea.

One of your crucial objectives here is mutual respect. Don't dis the narcissist. Things will escalate if you start speaking disrespectfully. Use deference, tact, a calm approach, empathy (not sympathy), and let them know you respect them (especially if you hate their guts). Immediately apologize if you've said or done anything to offend them. Remember you're dealing with a totally self-absorbed human here.

Another thing to remember is you must be genuinely respectful. If you're faking it, they will be able to tell instantly. Don't be patronizing or condescending. It's very likely that they have been faking good intentions longer than you have, and they're most likely skilled in manipulation. So, don't even try to sound genuine, actually be genuine. You don't agree with them, you don't like them, but you do respect them.

Another critical objective here is finding a long-term mutually agreeable solution. You can always just shoot them once you get what you need, but don't focus on the short-term. Leave them looking forward to talking with you again. And then you can shoot them.

When you're in a good mood you're more likely to notice important details and make good decisions. The reverse of that is when you're in a bad mood you're more likely to miss important details and make bad decisions. So, do your damnedest to stay in a positive state of mind. Eliminate distractions, walk as much as you can (even just a 20-minute walk can clear your head and help your cognitive processing), eat well, sleep well, keep up with your hygiene and self-care, find the time to unwind and relax when you can. You can't afford to slip up on account of low blood sugar.

When you do get them to commit to something, make them spell out all the details. Ask questions. Lots of questions. Get precise answers, nothing ambiguous is going to go through. When they can visualize the outcome with you down to the smallest details, that is a very strong indicator that they really mean business here.

All of this takes practice. If you get in enough practice with negotiating in safe, low-stakes scenarios, like talking to your partner about dinner plans, or negotiating with a toddler about naptime, this will just start coming naturally to you.

This is by no means an exhaustive list of tools and tactics. I'm probably still traumatized by some of it and have forgotten a lot. I just felt like posting what I could recall while I still have some grey cells speaking to each other.

If you find yourself in a situation where you need to negotiate with a terrorist, a narcissist, a sociopath, or just a self-centered asshole, do yourself a service and research, research, research! Read every book you can get your hands on, watch every YouTube video and listen to every podcast on high conflict/high stakes conversations and negotiations, learn about psychology, biopsychosocial rhythms, read every blog, website, white paper, magazine article, and stone tablet you can find about human behavior. Exhaust every avenue and arm yourself to the teeth with knowledge.

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

― Sun Tzu, The Art of War

Part II is now available.