#it's a ship i think more ''what are the implications of this?'' than the usual fuzzy shipping stuff

[transingthoseformers]

What do you think of the terminus x Megatron ship

-anon who loves adult x adult age gap ships

It's an interesting ship to play around with, it broke my damn heart in *Echoes of Messatine", and the implications of the ship on Megatron's relationship experience is intriguing

Especially if you know the fact that Terminus knew he was pushing Megatron in a certain direction with his work, and how Terminus's eventual death affects Megatron

also thinking about their reunion in MTMTE even though Megatron definitely thought he was dead, what things were like when they ended up staying behind in the Functionist universe, and Terminus's real death in the Functionist universe

[jamicha]

HELP! I ACCIDENTALLY ENGAGED IN FANDOM DISCOURSE !

somebody made a comment i dont like but it REAKED of internalized homophobia to me and weird projection and i couldn't contain the beast (stop myself from reply) and i may or may not have been a bit harsh and pointed out that fact. oops. i dont regret it but now ive decided to take this stance indefinitely til the day i die and i will die on this hill

(psst my full thoughts are in the tags if you wanna like look or smth)

[izvmimi]

cw: fluff/comfort-ish although it's an overall mild conversation. mention of kidnapping.

Luffy is acting strange.

A little strange might be the baseline for him, of course, but what you’ve noticed in the past 12 hours or so is a bit different than his normal flavor of strange - he’s being odd when it comes to you. 

Your shadow as always, but oddly stiff, Luffy has been navigating around you far too carefully, as if you were to shatter the moment he touched you. His hands hover gently over any part of your body but he avoids touching you unnecessarily; you notice he’s hesitant to hold your hand, and from the moment you woke up this morning, disoriented slightly by the sudden rock of the ship by an unexpectedly large wave, you noticed his modest distance, his forehead gently pressed against the back of your head and his arm loosely draped over your hip, rather than coiled around you like a snake.

Careful, gentle.

It’s so unlike him it makes you nervous. 

“Luffy,” you start finally, once the two of you have a quiet moment, hanging back in the kitchen. Everyone has left by now for their own pursuits after dinner - a few comments about Luffy’s appetite being slightly less terrifying than usual notwithstanding, he was relatively normal. But he’s lingered, crossing his legs on his chair in that familiar pose of his. You didn’t rise, Robin being kind enough to help clear all the dishes, even the half-eaten meal before you (again unthinkable with Luffy around).

The longer you think about it, perhaps the two of you were left alone here on purpose.

Luffy doesn’t respond immediately to the sound of your voice and you repeat his name again, letting your head rest on his shoulder. You can tell he has something to say but is unsure what, and coax him gently to speak by running your hand down the length of his forearm, interlacing your fingers together once you reach the hand.

He turns slowly to you, and the look on his face is apologetic more than anything, surprising for a man who limits emotions more complex than anger and joy in his expression.

“I’m happy you’re safe,” he says, simply.

Yesterday you were kidnapped on your stroll through the city, while Luffy had deviated off your path for a moment to peer at all things shiny and good-smelling. You didn’t immediately follow, and used to Luffy’s lazy but alarming practical yoinks of your body in space, snapping towards his side, you weren’t too automatically surprised when your feet suddenly left the ground.

Until you were face to face with an individual that was decidedly not Luffy at all.

The aftermath of all of that was settled quickly, a flurry of fists and yells quickly resolving the issue, but that wasn’t the part that lingers in Luffy’s psyche.

“I wasn’t in any danger, really,” you insist, and you mean it, not even a singular bruise on your skin, or a hair out of place.

You squeeze Luffy’s hand then smile at him brightly, trying to raise his spirits, even if only in the way the moon reflects back the sun’s shine. He knows it’s true even if it doesn’t necessarily fix things.

He twists his mouth to the side.

“That’s not the problem, is it?” you ask, sensing his continued discomfort. “You can’t expect things like that to not happen, we all have bounties, and-”

“You thought it was me.”

You blink, taken aback, and Luffy lets go of your hand for a moment as he turns fully to face you.

“I came out right when you got grabbed, and you didn’t scream at first until you saw it wasn’t me.”

You pause, letting his implication sit in.

“Luffy, what are you trying to say?” you ask.

He pauses for a moment, mulling the words in his mouth again, and your eyebrow furrows.

“You’ve said I was too rough with you before, but I didn’t think I was that bad.”

You open your mouth and close it, considering the fact that you wouldn’t be surprised if he threw you off a cliff with the promise to catch you at the bottom, as it wouldn’t help. 

“I trust you, Luffy,” you say instead, unexpected Gum-Gum Rockets aside. “It’s okay if you get excited, I know that you love me and would never hurt me.”

He pauses for a moment, eyeing you as if to detect any softening of the truth, and perhaps you are smoothing over the truth, but you are telling the truth.

The rowdy man before you, a little too strong for his own good, perhaps passionate as ever, never means to hurt you, and loves you terribly.

“I’m sturdier than you think,” you remind him. With that, you offer him a kiss on the cheek, which warms him, and he’s quick to take your own face in his two hands, the grin back on his face.

“I’ll be more careful,” he still promises anyway.

“Sure, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be a little playful at all,” you remind him, your hands gently covering his.

“I want you to feel safe with me,” he finally says, in a soft voice and you offer him back the biggest widest smile.

“There’s no safer place than when I'm with you.”

[violetwolfraven]

Wait wait wait remember that post about how Team Starkid/the Lang brothers are going to be comparable to Shakespeare 500 years from now and it was mostly played for laughs like yeah lol you’ll need a paragraph of footnotes to explain the zefron poster but like

I don’t think that’s actually far off from how Starkid’s place in theatre history might play out and here’s why. Just hear me out

Why is Shakespeare so popular today when he definitely wasn’t the only playwright from that era? When he’s not even the only playwright from that era from England that we have surviving works from?

Two main reasons:

1) Shakespeare’s work is (relatively) universally relatable. The characters do things that are so fundamentally human. They make jokes at their friends’ expense. They complain about being awkward in front of their crush. They have daddy issues. The plot lines of the plays aren’t too complicated. The dick jokes land whether you’re watching in 1611 or 2024, and they probably still will in 2637. Shakespeare’s works are timeless because he didn’t try to outsmart his audience. He wrote about things everyone could relate to rather than trying too hard to peacock his intellect in front of the nobility. This is not true of every playwright.

2) Shakespeare was really popular right around the time England started colonizing everything in sight. Copies of his work got shipped all around the world, translated into dozens of languages, performed probably thousands of times. Setting aside the moral implications of this, the important thing to note is that Shakespeare was about the most easily accessible English playwright during a time of rapid, intense globalization.

Meanwhile, Starkid:

1) Invests hard in meaningful, relatable character arcs instead of spectacle and expensive sets or costumes. Also, lowbrow, immature humor and dick jokes that make A Very Potter Sequel funny and enjoyable regardless of if you’ve ever seen any other Harry Potter media in your life.

2) Posts professional recordings of their musicals to YouTube FOR FREE, making their shows about the easiest, best quality musical theatre you can get pretty much anywhere in the world, regardless of if your area has an active theatre scene. Proshots from other companies are rare and usually not free. Bootlegs are all well and good, but even if the video quality is alright (and that’s a big if) the audio is usually garbage. Starkid has been posting the best quality free recordings they can afford since 2009, shortly after the birth of social media, another time of rapid, intense globalization.

In short, I’m not saying that theatre historians in 500 years won’t remember any our current Broadway faves, but I am saying that in my opinion, Team Starkid is probably going to be more accessible for the general public. If you’re a 26th century English teacher trying to teach your class about narrative structure in 21st century theatre, what are you going to show your students? A bootleg of Hadestown with blurry video and garbage audio? Or the professional recording of Twisted, parts of which they will probably even enjoy, because even long after no one remembers Disney’s Aladdin anymore, your class of 26th century 16-year-olds are still going to laugh at “No One Remembers Achmed.”

[burst-of-iridescent]

i've written before about how fire lady katara isn't an inherently disempowering or racist trope, as have many others, but lately i've been thinking about how arguments against fire lady katara often tend to utilise a surface-level interpretation of colonial trauma.

[edit: this post will use the term "colonial trauma" because those who argue against fire lady katara usually use the same wording or are referring to that concept. but it's important to note that according to show canon, the fire nation did not colonize the southern water tribe and zuko and katara did not have a colonizer/colonized relationship.]

antis who present this argument usually posit that marrying zuko would be a form of re-traumatization for katara, while marrying aang would "protect" her. katara is supposedly more shielded from confronting the impact of colonization in the southern water tribe or on air temple island than she would be with zuko in the fire nation, which contextualizes colonial trauma purely through the lens of physical interaction with the colonial power (ie. living in the fire nation or looking after the people of the fire nation). whether intended or not, this argument inadvertently limits colonial trauma to the geographical boundaries of the colonizing country and implies that it can be reduced or averted solely by minimizing contact with said country.

even leaving aside that we have seen katara in the fire nation (and enjoying herself there), the implication here is that active engagement with a colonial power as a member of colonized peoples is an inherent form of re-traumatization... which i take issue with for multiple reasons.

firstly, katara lives in a world that has been permanently shaped and changed by imperialism, and that's going to affect her no matter where she goes. sequestering herself in the south pole her whole life and never seeing a glimpse of fire nation red again won't allow katara to escape the legacy of colonization or the trauma it has caused her, because its influence is rooted in everything from her family to her tribe to her own bending. believe me, i understand the appeal of a world where women of colour can avoid reckoning with the impact of colonization by simply never setting foot in the colonizing country again, and why people might be uncomfortable with zutara individually as a result - but i can't accept it as a valid argument against the ship, because that's just not how colonial trauma works.

secondly, the idea that this "protects" katara reeks of paternalism because katara is not a character who chooses her path simply based on how safe or comfortable it is. if that was the case, she would never have left the southern water tribe at all! she could've remained there her whole life and likely been safe, since the fire nation had no real interest in the south pole any longer. katara is fundamentally defined by how relentlessly revolutionary she is - over and over, she chooses to do what is right, what is hard, what is unexpected, even at cost to herself. she challenges injustice and discrimination and bigotry; she fights for the downtrodden and speaks for those who can't speak for themselves; she will never ever turn her back on the people who need her. does that truly sound like someone who needs to be hid away and protected from her own supposed re-traumatization?

thirdly - and i fully accept that there are those who might disagree with this - katara actively choosing to engage with her colonial trauma can be empowering just as it can be traumatizing. don't get me wrong: as a woc and a minority in my own country, i understand how tiring it is to do this. i understand the exhaustion of confronting what was done to you and your people, of facing down bigotry over and over. i understand the desire to run away from it all, and why it can be wish fulfilment for others to let katara do so. i really, really do.

but there is also wish fulfilment in letting katara fight, as a brown girl with power and resources that few brown girls in the real world hold. there is a power fantasy in seeing katara head into the belly of the beast and emerging triumphant. there is empowerment to be found in seeing katara struggle with racism and ignorance and mindless hate to enact change - and succeed. i love reading and writing about katara unpacking her trauma regarding the fire nation, about growing to love the place she once hated, about reconciling both her homes and healing from the wounds of her childhood.

and ultimately, i think that's what katara would want for herself. after throwing herself head first into the fight against the fire nation, after facing down her greatest trauma instead of letting it consume her, after helping and protecting the people of the fire nation, after refusing to let the fire nation take anything else from her - i firmly believe that the last thing katara would do is allow herself to be ruled by the fire nation instead of being the one ruling it.

personally, i find that a more hopeful and victorious narrative than one where she remains safe and sheltered away from the fire nation, but forever haunted and dictated by her trauma. would that be realistic? perhaps. but the entire point of foiling katara with characters like jet and hama is to show that she's not doomed to be mired in the pain of her past. that where their stories could only end in tragedy, hers can - and does - end in hope for something better, as she always believed it could.

[granolawriting]

Within the confines of a ship ˚✧

pairing: Jedi!reader x Jedi Anakin

Summary: Spending night after night having sexual tension with a certian Jedi on a mission surrounded by your peers in a ship comes to a head when one day he stops trying to be discrete about what he wants.

Content warning: 18+ NSFW, minor exhibitionism, dom!Anakin, tension, Anakins a tease, breif aftercare, you guys stop caring about making no noise like halfway through, p in v unprotected, he cums in you, I don't think I actually wrote anything that explicitly makes the reader female, Anakin is glaringly cocky

word count: 2.6k

masterlist

A/N: so sorry this took so long to put out!!! I just moved to a new state :)! I hope u enjoy the second installment of my kinktober list, I'll see you all again on the 10th ;). Make sure if you like my work to check out my requests/comissions or my ko-fi!!!

The silent hum of a ship deeply comfortable in hyperspace and the muffled talk of fellow Jedi upon the ship fills your mind as you try to ensure that's all that enters it. Subconsciously you hone in on voices, unable to discern conversation but by mere tone and inflection alone could you spot him if he was there. 

… 

There he is. 

You felt the sound of his voice sink deep within your stomach, igniting your body ablaze. Even the mere sense of him in distance to you made you grow weak, feeling as a pool builds through slick underwear at how your mind allows it to wander. Anakin had never been explicitly sexual with you, never did his hands trail down the waistband of pants or under hooked lines of bras, never did his lips even touch yours or the flush of bodies against one another. You were completely left to your imagination, though not without the help of Anakin. 

You and him have always had a history, a tension of sorts. Never properly actualized with action but words were more than enough. The way his eyes devoured you when you walked past, soft words exchanged in private halls or even implicit praise after simulated battles between you and him. 

“Ooh, good girl. Seems like someones been practicing.” 

Small things. Though as he strung you along this road of implication and suggestion your mind was allowed to run wild with what else may lie within his own mind. The reactions to the things you’ve said in kind, and how if they were anything like how you responded-- with hands sinking to the ooze between your legs the moment you were home, you were more than certain that it couldn't last like this forever. What you would do more than anything to please him, hear how he moans, the way he’d praise you. The feeling of him inside of you, what did he even look like? 

It didn't help that you two were constantly surrounded by one another in hidden corners of a ship, it wasn't cramped but it was definitely rendering you on edge as every corner you turned had a much higher potential of holding anakin than it usually would. Though, with that, the tension only grew stronger. Seeing him fresh out of showers with only cloth wrapping his lower half, catching staring eyes from across dining room counters and most of all, the words exchanged in the few moments left alone with one another in the confines of the ship. 

“Where are you off too darling? 

“To my room, didn't think anyone else was awake. I was just going to head to bed.” 

You remember how close his face would inch towards yours, the soft clank of a heel that indicated one more step closer to yours. You remember the sly look on his face, a half cocked brow and egotistical smile, arms crossed and strands of hair littering his face. 

“I don't think anyone else here is awake either. Well, I'm glad I caught you before then.” 

The way he looked you up and down, subtle gnawing on his lip as he drank you in. the warm tug that drew your lips to his. 

“Why's that? Did you need something?” 

“Well I could tell you quite a few things I need from you.” 

You also remembered the hissing of a door behind you as it indicated its opening. The feeling of the flutter in your heart quickly dies as dread follows in the wake of something interrupting such a moment. To turn behind you you greet a jedi that you barely remember the name of. And with that does Anakin take off once more through the same door-- eyes locked on you and a smile that feels as though it was coated with lust as his mind was a secret to you but his body told a similar story. Every part of it. 

Lifting yourself off the bed you trail slow feet towards your door, an entrance to the room where anakin shared. Unsure of what you were meaning to do when you got to him, all you knew is that you needed to see him. Talk to him. Something. 

Walking out into the common area you watch his eyes on you once more, growing from notice to intrigue as you grow closer to him. Those around him stop conversation briefly, tuned in also to what means you had to be out there. 

“Hey Ani, do you think I could talk to you for a second?” 

“Oh yeah, what's up?” 

“Um, 

Pausing for a second you don't know what to say. Everyone's eyes lay on you as they dissect your motives, morbidly curious about what you’re to say to him. 

“Alone, please? You can just come into my room.” 

A look on Anakin's face that was initially worry quickly molded into something much more lustful, the cocky grin coated his face once more and a hood to his eyes that insinuated that his mind was someplace much different than the rest of the people in the room regarding what you were implying. You didn't even know what you were implying. All you wanted was to go out there and see him, watch the way he moved and allow yourself to sink deep within his eyes and embrace the enchantment you held for his every feature. The desire you had for every inch upon his body. 

“Say no more.” 

A smirk curved on the right side of his cheek as he lifted himself up from his seat. Watching as his fingers comb through long hair that pushed it back for just a moment before laying perfectly upon his face, sculpting his face did slight waves along its side make way for a weakening gaze to fall upon you that made you feel as though your knees were to give out. 

The short walk to your cabin felt like miles as every step that loomed behind you was an aura of uncertainty and tension that built up with every foot you moved closer behind that door. 

The sound of the doors open and subsequent closing made your heart well up in anticipation, fear almost. You didn't know what to do, what to say. You had nothing to talk to him about other than your insatiable lust for him, and that wasn't quite on the table to casually discuss. Though as you look for the words to speak he says them for you. 

“And what exactly did you need to talk to me about in silence, hm?” 

He taunts you, it's clear in dark tone and greedy eyes that he knows precisely what is so hard to get out. 

“Oh well I, I don't quite know how to say it.” 

“Oh come on, use your words.” 

“I'm trying it's just that I-” 

“Spit it out baby I don't have all day.” 

Banter back and forth as he capitalizes on your meekness comes to a head, and with the inability to put words into sentences at the face of him towering over you with a taunting glance you lean in for a kiss. 

Anakin, caught by surprise, has eyes wide open, but after a moment passes a smile can be felt to grow wide on his lips as he deepens the kiss. Arms snake around your waist as he yanks you closer, both bodies flush against one another as your back curves slightly at the tug of his arms on the small of your back. 

“Good girl, I wonder how long it’d take you.” 

He lets up for breath and whispers in your ear as he moves a hand to your head, stroking your hair as your senses are overtaken by the words pouring into your ear. He sounded greedy, cocky. He had been toying with you, seeing how long it took until you broke. He loved watching you writhe under him, hums escaped your lips at the mere vibration of his voice against your body, the touch of his lips against yours. 

You feel his knees bend slightly as his hands make swift moves to the back of your thighs, lifting you up does he return his lips to yours. Feeling him grunt inside your mouth as he walks you over to the bed, interlocking your legs around his as he tosses you on unmade sheets. Crawling on top of you does he deepen the kiss evermore, sticking his tongue into the back of your throat do you feel a growing bulge within his pants. Laid directly on top of you did you feel it grow mere inches above your heat, desperately you find yourself unconsciously grinding on it to feel it even more. He's big, even through loose pants does he leave no room for imagination as it presses up against you. Feeling it twitch through thin layers of cloth. 

“Fuck-- ngh. Wasting no time hm?”

His hands caged you in at either side, he let up from your kiss to focus on the feeling you provided him below his waist. You felt as his hips started to follow rhythm with your waist, inching lower down your body so his bulge laid directly atop your heat. 

Through desperate buckling of hips you speed up pace, feeling him right on top of you as the only thing separating him from you being a few pieces of cloth. Biting back your lip do you desperately try to hold back the moans that scratch at your throat at the feeling of him rubbing on you. 

A hand falls on your mouth the moment you let one slip. 

“Don't make a fucking sound. I know how much you love my cock baby, but we’ve got to stay quiet hm? Think you can do that for me?” 

You nod your head in agreement. He removes his hand and fixes his rhythm atop you once more. 

“Fuck it. I need to be inside of you.” 

Legs straddle your lower half as his body folds to take off your pants. Cool air hits the exposed wetness of underwear as you feel a finger drag along its center. 

“All of this for me baby?” 

He teases your clit with his index, moving it in slow circles as he trails up and down your folds. 

“You’re so fucking hot.” 

Taking his own pants off does he leave no underwear on himself, revealing his cock that stood mere inches from your entrance. 

Fuck he’s huge. 

Leaning on you once more does he flush exposed cock along the slick coating your underwear. Kissing you slowly as he moves his hips up and down your heat. 

“Mmhg, god, anakin please” 

“Please what? Come on, speak up baby.” 

“Please, please fuck me. I need to feel you I can't stand it anymore.” 

“I love hearing you beg for me.” 

He snakes a hand down to your underwear, pulling it to the side as he coats his cock with your juices. It takes everything in you not to whine out his name as he slowly teased you, feeling how hard his cock was against you moments before he finally put it in. 

As he waits at your entrance for a moment, you feel him slowly sink into you as muted groans escape bitten lip. 

“God you’re so tight.” 

His head bucks up as he inches deeper in you, exposing a neck with small beads of sweat and defined jaw as his face looks up at the ceiling. 

As his body grows flush against yours, you feel more full than you have in your whole life. No finger could ever suffice the sheer size of him, all the times you’d imagined him inside of you with even 3 of your own deep within you could never amount to how it felt now. The curve of his cock hitting the entrance to your womb, your entire body engulfed in flames at the feeling of him merely being warmed inside of you. 

With steady motion he began moving in and out of you, your hands grip the sheets of your mattress at the mere feeling of him pumping in and out of you, legs instinctively shutting together at the feeling. Though with stern hands does he push you back upon again; 

“Open your legs for me, baby. I wanna see you.” 

And you obliged, heavy calloused hands grip on your thighs as he gets steady motion inside of you. Labored breaths as his brows contort in pleasure upon finally feeling inside of you. 

“You don't know how long I've wanted this baby. To finally fuck you like you deserve, I could have never imagined how tight you would be imagining you as my fist every night.” 

your head turns into the sheets of your bed as he begins to pump into you harder-- your body overtaken by white hot pleasure that sank deep into your stomach as the only thing you could think of is how your body memorized his cock. The feeling of every vein and every inch, the way it curved into you and the constant push on the perfect spot that made you feel like you were going insane. 

“Huhh, Anakin please don't stop. Please, please” 

You begin to beg in a hushed voice as every word you spoke was laced with whines and moans. 

“Oh what? Are you going to cum baby?” 

You respond in a hummed moan that gives him all the information he needs. His hand trails to your clit as he begins to play with it as he thrusts into you. Picking up the pace of not only his hips but his fingers as they both make you go dumb with pleasure. 

“Come on, cum on my fucking cock. Get even tighter for me baby I know you can do it. I want to feel your legs fucking shake for me, feel you convulse on my cock.” 

You feel it well up inside of you as you boil over, and only a few more seconds after his demands were you plunged into a frenzy of movement under him. His arms grip your legs together as he pumps into you through your orgasm, never stopping for a moment as he rides it out using you even after you’ve finished. 

“God-- anakin I cant. I cant please,” 

“Come on, I know you can take it. Be a good girl will you?” 

You lay flat against the bed as he uses you, fucking into you as though you were just a toy. But as your orgasm finished his was soon to build up. His thrusts becoming irregular and desperate, sweat collected on the ends of his hair as it fell into his face. 

“Say my name.” 

“A..Anakin” 

“Say my fucking name.” 

“Anakin!”

You yelp his name as he slams into you, feeling him pour into you as he dumps every last drop of himself inside of you. You feel him twitch inside of you as his cum seeps out of open edges of your insides as he stays flush to you through his orgasm. Legs slightly twitch as he seems hard to stand, and slowly he pulls himself out of you to leave only a pool of white leaking out of you in its wake. 

“Let me get you cleaned up. Stay right there.” 

He commands you as he walks into your bathroom a few feet away, gathering a towel to wipe along your heat and anywhere that has substances that can't quite stay there. Though through labored breath he continues; 

“I think we’re going to have to do that more often, baby.”

[dunmeshistash]

Marcille is/was a teacher to Falin, and I read somewhere that romantic student/teacher relationships are a big taboo in Japan. Like more so than over here. But they were also romanticized so they show up fairly often in anime. I guess what I'm saying is, maybe Marcille is unwilling act on any romantic feelings for Falin because of this taboo? (As well as Falin being 23 just feeling too young to an elf)

Well, nothing indicates she was an actual teacher, she's described as an student and as a researcher but not as a teacher. Here's some discussion about her role at the school

When she corrects Laios she says she wasn't a student but a researcher but in her descriptions she's called a honor student.

Falin is the only one that calls her a teacher (as far as I remember) but I don't think she meant a literal teacher at the school

In the original she calls her 恩師 which is like a respected former teacher? I don't know if it has implications about her role at the school but nothing indicates she was ever actually in a teacher position (as far as I know), Falin might just mean that Marcille mentored her in magic and she respects her for it?

But anyway, I don't know if japanese sensitiveness would count on Dungeon Meshi in that aspect, Ryoko Kui treats her characters as westerners and even puts their sensitivities against japanese ones with the use of Shuro, like with the hugging section of daydream hour or when Mickbell and Chilchuk are shocked at him for proposing

Marcille and Laios come from the same continent and the place she lived was a small village in fantasy europe so I don't think japanese taboos would count for her

Marcille also only mentions seeing Falin as a little kid and doesn't talk about her as a student (and in context to me she's saying she'll never be too big (too grown up) to sleep together with her) I think she does see Falin as someone younger but idk if she actually see's her as a kid the same way she sees Chilchuck as a kid

Anyway I usually don't answer shipping questions but I wanted to answer this one cause of the cultural differences bit.

Gotta remember using drugs is also very frowned upon in japan and Kui has drugs in her worldbuilding without demonizing it's use, so I don't think general taboos would affect the worldbuilding like that?

Also there's nothing in the story about Marcille's feelings towards Falin that would indicate she's holding back in any sense so I don't think it would fit. Headcanon is free from canon shackles tho.

[thefandomdirtymind]

Please a OPLA Sanji x fem shyreader magic user? The crew caught them making out ☺️☺️

A/N IMPORTANT:  Hello Anon ! Thank you for your request, I admit it gave me some kind of problem since I'm the exact opposite of shy, but I had fun trying to wonder how it look like and how Sanji would succeed to make himself understand without scaring the reader. I hope you will like it !

The Magic of a Kiss

OPLA - Vinsmoke Sanji

Sanji series : SFW Shiny Offering - NSFW The Small Favor - SFW The Mermaid Dream

* English is not my first language, I tried really hard to correct myself but, I hope you will excuse me if some mistakes are still there.  

—

From as far as you could remember, you're always been able to make the object around you levited . A power who had created a lot of fun games and yes, a few childish misfits. But, it was your family heritage and you couldn’t be more proud to have inherited it. 

Based in a small village near the water, populated mostly by other magical folks, your family had a small shop you never truly learned to love. Your interest was more in the water and the many ships sailing on it. It's why one day, after a heated argument about your lack of implication in the family business, you decide to leave for the city.  

Shy by nature, you weren't the kind to show off, even if as a magic user, your power would have opened many doors ordinary people couldn’t even dream of reaching. But, after a few disastrous interactions, when even meeting the gaze of the Captain was above your force. You finally meet Luffy and his straw hat crew. 

Their warm approach toward you and your power made you quickly feel more comfortable. But, as they tried to get to know you more, you could stop yourself from feeling nervous to open up and bore them. You usually end up silently smiling,fidgeting your fingers, listening to their fantastique adventure and executing the heavy duty since gravity isn't a problem for you. As the time passes, they all accept your shyness, still including you in their conversation and other activities. 

Sanji was by far your favorite member of the crew, to not say you had a pretty hard crush on him. Things who’s even more complicated the task to answer him as he asks you the simplest question or tries to make you happy by cooking your favorite dishes. Of course, the blond chef would never make fun of your betterave red cheeks and often stutter, but he couldn’t help himself to flirt with you. He never had seen something more cute than your reaction as you enjoy his food and he had to admit that nothing makes him more proud than the way you look at him when you thought nobody saw you. 

It’s why one evening, as you were helping Usopp to repair the mainmast, effortlessly sending him the multiple parts of wood he needed. Sanji took place at your side, lighting a cigarette nonchalantly.

“ It amazes me each time watching you use your talent Madam“ He confessed, watching absently the plank of wood gaining altitude. “ Isn’t it exhausting to keep control of the object ?” 

“ No…I just think of it and…then they float…” You replied, already feeling the tips of your ears warming.You would for nothing share with anyone, the humiliated time it takes you to learn how to push them in the right direction and stop before reaching your face.  

“ Oh, so you have to think at every separated item to make them fly…But what happens if you aren’t in a situation to think, like say overwhelmed ? “ His tone, serious, but clearly flirting. Even if you could feel a trap, you couldn’t think of a single time when you could become so self absorbed that you couldn’t even think. “ Like let's say we kiss, will all the objects of the room start to levitate or just our heart ? “ 

The loud “ BAM “ of the plank slamming against the lower desk makes you jump, you face bright red. Up in the air, Usopp asked what happened, worried that something had occurred to you. It push as well Zoro and Nami out of the own preoccupation, concern if it was a normal noise of a sign of a near danger.With the warrant on Luffy head, your Captain who’s right now was snoring somewhere, they didn’t take any  chance.  

“ Sanji ! Don’t tease me like that…please ! “ You plead, your gaze fixed on the floor, embarrassment clearly making you want to disappear on the floor.  

“ I’m not teasing, I’m truly curious to know…We should try one day” He proposed, a smile playing on his lips as he finished his smoke before heading back to the kitchen “ I make your favorite breakfast tomorrow don’t miss it please”

That conversation spined in your head for at least a few weeks before you accept the meaning of it. Sanji had in his smooth way, confessed his affection for you and waited for you to be ready to do the same. Meantime, he didn’t push you further more, dosing his usual flirt and neither talked about it in front of the others, knowing clearly how you would be mortified. 

Until that day. 

The crew had stopped the ship alongside an island reminding you of pictures of jungle you often saw in exploration books. Each taking a different path to explore the village and his surrendering, you quickly become bored and decide to come back to the ship, certain that you were alone aboard. 

It was why the sound of metal brushing against what seemed to be the same component took you by surprise. Making your way to the kitchen, you discover Sanji, already busy cracking eggs in a bowl. Lifting his head, he smiled as he discarded the empty shell. 

“ Already back ? Are you hungry? I am planning to make an omelet for dinner, but i’m not sure if the other will be back so I will make small ones. “ 

Nodding slowly, watching nervously around you, you decided that if you had to respond to his previous invitation it was now or never. 

“ Sanji I…I...You remember that…you know that conversation...about...my talent and...Kiss…” You succeed to say, your hand sweating against your pants.

“ Yes, I remember” He replied, careful to not scare you away.

“ I would like to try…” You finally quickly confessed, your whole body burning like if you had a fever.

Washing his hand with the rag hanging on his shoulder, Sanji gently smiles contouring the kitchen island to place himself in front of you. Putting delicately your chin between his thumbs and his index, he lowered his head trying to meet your evasive gaze. 

“ I would like to see your pretty eyes Madam before kissing you “ He demanded, as you nervously turned your gaze to meet him. “ Much better” He smiled. 

His lips meet yours with tenderness, as his other hand makes himself a home on your hip. Slowly, you closed your eyes, making yourself melt in the multiples sensation of his soft mouth against yours, followed after a certain time by the teasing of his teeth nibbling your bottom lips. Your tongue quickly follows his invitation, brushing against each other, as you hand find their way to his broad shoulder. 

Inclining your head slightly higher to accommodate your difference of height, you instantly reach again for his lips, not wanting to let him go yet. 

Lost in the moment, you didn’t hear the rest of the crew come back, dinner being an abstract place in time way ahead of the feeling of Sanji against you. 

“ WOAH Y/N you can make people levitate now, that’s so cool ! “ You heard Luffy exclaim as Nami, knowing how embarrassed you should be, tried to drag him out. 

Feeling the floor meet your feet, as the cacophony of gravity regain his control of every none fixed item in the room, you promptly separated yourself of Sanji, who’s for once, was as much blushing as you do. 

“ I guess that means dinner isn't ready, “ Zoro said, unmoved by what he just saw, already taking his place at the table alongside Luffy. 

“ Guys we should maybe go eat somewhere else “ Nami tried, eyeing you hoping that it wouldn't push you to close up yourself more. 

“ No need Nami,  dinner almost ready just, give me just a minute “ Sanji protest regaining his composure before clearing his throat, whispering gently to you “ Now since we know that you make float everything around you and everyone you kiss…please Darling, let me be the only one to fly with you” 

Blushing even more, you couldn't resist laughing in front of the embarrassing but joyful event.

“ I swear “ You promised, already excited for the next time.

[theunsinkableship1]

Help! I'm in a parasocial relationship with Lukola.

⚠️DISCLAIMER: This is LUKOLALAND only. Skip this if you're not a shipper. This is only my point of view. No harm intended.

Like many of us in Lukolaland, I fell for POLIN first, their fictional chemistry was attractive, and it pulled me in. But it wasn’t long before I fell harder for LUKOLA captivated by their real-life magnetic chemistry, the undeniable connection between the actors behind the characters which is absolutely based on friendship, but which I also believe is so much more than that. LUKOLA is now an increasingly significant part of my daily life, and while I don’t exactly know how or why I got here, here I am, steady aboard this ship. As someone experiencing this for the first time and seeing a lot of criticism towards the Lukola fandom, I wanted to reflect on what’s really going on here. After already delving into the negativity within the fandom in two previous posts, I now want to focus on the broader conversation about the legitimacy of our community.

A parasocial relationship is a one-sided connection where one party, usually a fan, becomes emotionally invested in a celebrity, fictional character, or public figure who doesn’t reciprocate that same level of personal connection. It’s a common phenomenon, especially in the digital age, where media blurs the lines between public personas and real people.

People often criticize shipping real people, like Luke and Nicola, claiming it’s “weird” or even invasive. I’ll admit, there’s a strangeness to it, and boundaries are important. But is it fair to label us as crazy for simply being invested in a connection we perceive? If we think about it, we “ship” people in our real lives all the time rooting for our friends to get together, hoping our favorite colleagues will hit it off. It’s human nature to be invested in connections we care about.

People say that the World Tour was only PR and that we are delusional to think they are together in real life. Most of us don’t think they’re together now that’s exactly why we’re shipping them, we saw something exceptional between them and we definitely think that they should be together, that’s the point. We can differentiate actors from characters that’s why we call them LUKOLA and not POLIN. There may have been some blurred lines and some real-life mirroring but that’s not the bulk of it.

It is true that the way the promotion was handled for season 3 intentionally blurred those lines. The marketing campaign, press interviews, and social media content often leaned heavily into the chemistry between the leads, with subtle implications that left room for fan speculation about a real-life relationship.

It’s important to address why dismissing the dynamic between Luke and Nicola as mere PR or labeling those who see a genuine connection as "crazy" is not okay.

The connection between Luke and Nicola has been evident for years, not just during the World Tour but also in their past public interactions and behind-the-scenes footage. Observers have noted consistent emotional undertones like shared glances, supportive gestures, and a natural intimacy that goes beyond professional behavior, suggesting a bond that isn't easily fabricated by PR. Their closeness has been acknowledged by some cast, crew, and even friends and family members, further validating what fans have perceived.

Many dismiss their relationship as PR due to biases rooted in celebrity culture, where staged romances are common. This skepticism often leads people to view all interactions as scripted, making it easier to label the connection as fake rather than recognizing the complexities of genuine human emotions unfolding under public scrutiny. Critics often struggle to separate the actors' real-life bond from their on-screen personas, overlooking the authenticity of their unscripted moments. Calling fans “crazy” for believing in their connection imposes a narrow view on what is clearly a nuanced and personal dynamic between Luke and Nicola.

It’s worth questioning why shipping fictional characters whose fates are pre-written and often predictable is more accepted than shipping real people who exhibit real chemistry and connection, on-screen and off. Fictional characters are constructed for our entertainment and should have a lesser impact on our reality, but when it comes to real-life dynamics, the thrill often lies in the authenticity and unpredictability.

Those dismissing the Lukola fandom often do so from a place of bias, without recognizing that many fans are deeply invested and knowledgeable about what they see behind the scenes, during interviews, and on social media. To us, the connection between Luke and Nicola isn’t just a fleeting fantasy, it’s something rooted in countless interactions that we’ve seen unfold publicly and sometimes even subtly in their private behaviors.

Some people also dismiss Lukola because they can’t fathom the connection due to their own preconceptions, like claiming Nicola isn’t Luke’s “type” based on superficial judgments. But connection often defies typecasting; it’s about shared moments, mutual respect, and chemistry that goes beyond looks or what we think we know about a person’s preferences. Critics often label fans as “crazy” for seeing a genuine connection between Luke and Nicola, imposing their own biases on them. These narrow views overlook the real, evolving nature of personal connections. Nicola's or Luke’s perceived divergences from the “ideal” partner is often unfairly judged, reflecting broader societal biases, including gendered scrutiny and fan projections. These misperceptions say more about public expectations than about Luke and Nicola’s real relationship, which is a deeply personal and nuanced relationship; Dismissing their bond because it challenges existing narratives. Recognizing the authenticity of their bond isn’t about fantasy; it’s about understanding the complexities of human relationships, especially under public scrutiny.

The Lukola fandom isn’t just a collection of people projecting their fantasies; it’s a group that sees a unique, genuine bond between two people, one that even some of their castmates, crew members, and close friends have noticed and commented on. Our community is about celebrating that bond and exploring the emotions it evokes, not just blindly fantasizing about it. The criticisms we face often come from people who view things through a biased lens, dismissing our perceptions often because they don’t align with theirs.

Lukola fandom provide an outlet for creativity, where fans can engage in discussions, create fan art, write fanfiction, and explore different interpretations of the interactions they love. It offers a sense of belonging and community, connecting people with shared interests. For many of us, being part of this fandom provides a supportive environment where we can express ourselves without being called crazy or delusional.

We can celebrate the content we love, helping to promote and keep the interest alive in Lukola and Bridgerton, and their other projects. This can contribute to the longevity of the careers and even influence future productions. The Lukola fandom has a right to exist and can be a positive community as long as its members engage responsibly. The key is maintaining a healthy balance between enjoying the content and respecting the personal lives of those involved in its creation.

We as fans should strive to maintain an objective perspective, appreciating Lukola’s work and interactions without crossing into invasive and illegal activities, entitlement or unrealistic expectations.

We should approach this with more tact and care, very demurely very mindfully, avoiding putting too much pressure on them to prevent any unintended consequences. It's important to keep our content within our community and minimize direct interactions, such as tagging or sharing posts with them, as much as possible. Let’s create a respectful space that doesn’t intrude on their personal boundaries.

In the end, it’s not about whether it’s right or wrong to ship real people; it’s about respecting the emotional investment of others and recognizing that these connections whether real or imagined bring joy, comfort, and community to many of us in Lukolaland.

[rawmeknockout]

Request

Oh please more Whirl! Maybe with Seeker reader, I feel like even if his partner is more level headed he'd be able to convince them to do batshit things like screwing in the air or being his alibi for things. But also he's so fucking damaged and I want to hold him to my chest and kiss him.

It was just a passing question, one you didn't think about too much at first. Rodimus had asked you how things were going between you and Whirl, a polite question as he leaned too far back in the Captain's chair. It was dangerously close to dumping him out on the floor. And it was... Normal. Everything was normal between you two. It wasn't until you were walking down the corridor after your shift that you began to think about what normal was now. You hadn't even thought about the implication that it was "You and Whirl". The two of you never really established that there was a combination of your lives, although that didn't mean that wasn't what others picked up.

And perhaps there didn't need to be any clarification. Clearly others saw you two as a package deal, and, when you thought about it, that was how your situation had developed, right? You two were never truly separated, even when you were assigned separate tasks. Even when you spent hours, even days, apart, the end was the same. You went back to the same habsuite, the same routine, as usual. One that involved you and Whirl: intimately, familiarly.

How were things going? It's good. It's stable. It's you and Whirl. Things you wouldn't have attributed to the frenzied mech before. Everything used to be so different, back when you didn't have an inkling of a life where Whirl took part. He has pulled you into crazy shit, has driven you insane more times than you can count, has had you screaming at him until you felt light-headed over the careless way he'll throw himself into danger. Even coaxed you into flight-frame interface (which does not feel nearly as scandalous as it used to). At the same time, he's clearly mellowed out. Shown you how a mech like him can settle down, has shown you how you could settle down. He still throws himself into the heat of battle, longs for any chance he can get to feel the crunch of metal under his claws, but he doesn't aimlessly act out anymore. Doesn't pick fights where it's not warranted. Doesn't say the first thing that he knows will get a rise out of someone.

Where you used to dream of adventure, of the next chance you could hop on a ship headed for nowhere, of any chance where you could get away from your nuisance of a roommate, now you can only think of getting off work and returning to the comfort of your habsuite. You had once wanted to hold Cybertron in the palm of your hand, as many Seekers do, lead your own platoon of battle-hungry Autobots. That person feels unrecognizable to you.

You're stopped at your door before you even know it, having spent the whole walk lost in thoughts of yesterday, and the passcode is nothing but a secondary thought. As familiar as the back of your hands. Whirl is hunched over his desk, tinkering with an Earth toy that jingles with a broken music-box. His love of fiddling with clocks has led him to seeking out any odd piece of Earth tech he can get his claws on, the tiny mechanics so alike to the inner workings of what he was already familiar with. It took just one brush with some half broken contraption an alien vendor was hawking to spur a new hobby for Whirl. He's good at it. Bringing human technology back to life as if it were a beloved treasure. Even out in the deepest parts of space, there is the jingling of human music that Whirl is able to expertly lift from the brink of being lost.

These broken mechanisms shouldn't sell for as much as some of the vendors think they should, but you can never say no to Whirl's desires.

You can't imagine living any other way.

You lean over him, arms winding around his thin neck, to place a soft kiss on the top of his glowing optic. You feel the scrunched brow plates unfurl under your touch. Your wings flicker with your laughter.

Life with Whirl is good.

[iamnmbr3]

'why do you ship drarry, malfoy bullied him'

malfoy should have been redeemed and they are absolutely OBSESSED with each other. It might as well be romantic

And ppl seem pretty sensible. If a bit too horny

I have thoughts on this. Because the thing is, no one should feel like they need a reason to dislike a ship or to not engage with it. They can have a reason. But it's also just fine to...not vibe with something. That's ok too. There's content and ships that make me super uncomfortable or that just plain dislike. Sometimes for clear specific reasons and sometimes just...because. Sometimes to the point that I hate even scrolling past it on ao3. And that's all ok. What's not ok is harassing other people over or it dictating what other people like or engage with. Wish more people remembered that. It would make fandom so much nicer if people could all do that.

And yeah. I feel like Draco's story needed more closure. I mean, canonically he does get a redemption arc - he changes his views and becomes a better person - but JKR somehow both wrote that and also doesn't acknowledge the implications. Also, after being such a central character and being literally the reason Harry wins his duel against Voldemort it feels weird for him to not at least have a final conversation with Draco where he gives his wand back etc. (And then they fall in love and get married epilogue whom?!)

Also I am more than on board with super dark highly toxic enemies to lovers ships. They aren't for everyone but I like them. To me personally though, drarry doesn't really fall into that category, at least as it is presented in canon. What Harry and Draco have to me feels like a rivalry - a very intense, very hostile one (I mean they do literally end up as soldiers on opposite sides of a war), but a rivalry nonetheless. And there is obviously a grey area between bullying and rivalry. My point is not to dismiss all the ways Harry and Draco have hurt each other. But merely to point out that to me the dynamic feels very different than shipping Snape and Sirius for example, or Draco and Ron for that matter, where it feels like there's more of a clear past bully & victim dynamic. This is not a reason to ship or not to ship any of these ships. To each their own. It's merely a commentary on how I tend to view drarry.

As to the last point. I don't think people can really be "too horny." Sex and sexual desire are just as valid to explore or depict in fiction/art and just as valid a reason to create fiction/art as any other reason. Generally speaking I find that the best and most creative and diverse fandom environments that lead to the greatest quality and diversity of content are the ones where people who want to be 'horny on main TM' in their creative endeavors can be without fear of any type of negative repercussion. That's not to say everyone has to create, enjoy or even engage with that type of content. But its presence is usually a sign of a healthy fandom ecosystem.

[aro-culture-is]

I've been questioning if I am aro or not for the past year, previously I identified myself as a lesbian because I dont have an interest in men, and I usually feel more comfortable on women. However when I try to imaginr myself in the future I dont see myself being in a relationship in the future, like I am wondeeng "how the hell does one manage a relationship"

But I dont know if I am really aro because when I was in middle school I had a sort of "crush" on a person but I was mostly thinking "Hey this girl is really nice and the only person that understands me maybe I have a crush on her" and I really love the idea of romance and shipping characters and seeing other aromantic people being repulsed by the idea made me question even more.

hi! thanks for reaching out. since it's been a while since I've answered stuff like this, reminder that all asks of this nature are filed under the tag 'am i aro'

Your first paragraph is such a common experience in a-spec communities - initially, most folks start from "well, i'm not attracted to x gender, so I must be attracted to y?" or "well, I'm equally attracted to all genders, so I must be bi/pan?" when the problem is, 0 attraction to one gender is not related at all to how you feel about others, and 0 = 0. You're in very, very good company among a-spec folks, including yours truly - who rotated through the whole of LGBTQ before realizing aromanticism was an option that actually fit very well.

With regards to the second paragraph - first of all, mood! Personally, that "crush" was something we'd later identify as a squish, or friendship crush. Hilariously, we no longer like this particular person at all, as becoming friends led to us discovering our specific neurodivergent flavors interacted to constantly frustrate us. Enjoying - or not enjoying - romance and shipping is not at all something inherent to your attraction.

Plenty of outwardly aro folks talk more about our experiences with romantic repulsion and frustrations with shipping culture because we are in aromantic spaces and talking about the sociological implications, but - personally? I adore shipping, dislike seeing irl romance, and think it's mostly interesting to talk about how romance interacts with expectations and laws in society. I don't like to call myself romance repulsed, romance favorable, any of that - I think those are personally limiting to my identity and how I interact with those subjects. Other folks find it useful as a shorthand to explain how they feel, and that's great too!

I can't tell you what your identity is, but I think it's useful to say this: you've described to me a very, very common story to many a-spec folks. You're seeking advice from me, which tells me it probably matters a lot to you, and I wouldn't be surprised if, in some ways, you feel like you need permission, or verification, or any of those sorts of things.

I think, rather than relying on that - what would happen if, privately, you give yourself permission to explore what it feels like to say "I am aromantic", or "I think I'm aromantic"? How do you feel? Nervous, anxious, bubbly, weighed down, vulnerable - those are all common. But the thing is, if I think of an identity I am 100% sure I do not belong to in that way - I certainly don't feel a little flutter of hope. I don't feel like I might be onto a scary new journey. I just feel like I've said that the world is shaped like a rabbit - nonsensical and wrong. If you feel like there's a possibility - does it hurt you to say, "I might be, and what does that change?" The worst that happens is, quite literally, you learned something about yourself.

-- mod axel

[curseanon]

The Issue with Eden Polycule

So I wanted to articulate my thoughts on a relationship that ive seen in fandom spaces and lots of fan art or fanfiction. I don’t have any opinions or problems with Adam/Eve/Lucifer/Lilith, but I feel like there are some implications and tropes that we should be more careful about when it comes to Eve/Lucifer/Lilith or even just Eve/Lucifer. Before getting into it though, just a disclaimer: this post is not about polycules in general. It’s not my cup of tea personally, but ship whatever you please! This post is just me rambling about my own thoughts. Feel free to have your own interpretations. ALSO! None of this justifies Adam’s behavior. He is responsible for his decisions, including his cruelty towards people, language, and his decision to essentially wage mass genocide each year. And this post isn’t to say that this relationship drama is the sole reason why he ended up doing exterminations.

1. I don’t really like portrayals that have Lucifer/Lilith (L/L) sleeping with Eve and having her cheat on Adam, especially when it takes place in Eden. I’m afraid Vivzie might have this narrative take place in HH, but doing so does a real disservice to Eve’s (and Lucifer’s if he acted alone) character by having her be willing to cheat, and also does a disservice to Adam by having him be cheated on for reasons that are probably not entirely his fault. Not to mention a lot of media where this happens often has the tone of just “haha let’s cuck Adam twice,” which comes off to me as petty and unfair. Not only is it not a funny joke, but it essentially reinforces and justifies Adam’s misogynistic tendencies later. Especially the ideas that women are promiscuous, always willing to cheat and be unfaithful. The narrative would do nothing to disprove this if BOTH of Adam’s wives did in fact cheat on him.

2. Another thing about Eden. Lilith was Adam’s first wife, literally created for the purpose of being his partner. This is also pre-Apple, meaning that Adam has no concept of right vs wrong. The way he acts, if he truly was controlling and mean and the story book wasn’t exaggerating (which I doubt), is entirely the programming of the angels and the way they tolerate or enable his behavior. Assuming we went with the theory that Adam never ate the apple, it’s the same situation with Eve if she left him and/or cheated with L/L. The way I see it, Lilith’s cheating on Adam is not justified, even if she disagreed with Adam on certain things.

3. I also want to note that cheating on one’s partner is not a justifiable punishment for Adam’s behavior. Whether pre or post apple (now assuming he did eat it), I see it as fighting fire with fire, and all it usually does is create even more hostility and problems than if the person just clearly broke off the relationship first. L/L/E runs the risk of inadvertently encouraging unfaithfulness in relationships and marriages as solutions to a problem, but this is rarely the case. As stated earlier, it only makes Adam justified in acting the way he does. And with that justification, is he really in the wrong for how he treats women? What reason does he have to change his behavior if he is right about them? I could probably accept both wives leaving him if the purpose is to justify Adam’s behavior and not just mock him, to show how morality is not just black and white and the villains sometimes have justifiable reasons for thinking the way they do. But it still seems very shallow on Lilith and Eve’s parts.

4. This part is just my opinion on L/L/E, but I don’t find the idea of Eve getting with the people who caused her to lose Eden very convincing. L/L are the reasons her and Adam were cast out of the garden and made to live for centuries laboring to survive, farming cursed ground and painfully delivering several children. Not to mention the bringing of sin and death into the world, losing Abel at the hands of his brother and Cain being cast away to wander the Earth. All the suffering she faced in life and the suffering of all of her descendants, all of humanity. Her sleeping with Lucifer makes no sense to me unless he seduced her (when she was more naive, maybe even pre-apple) intentionally, either for the purpose of hurting Adam or if he did just love her also, which makes him complicit in ruining someone’s marriage. None of this fits with Lucifer’s character, a malewife who adores his Tall Queen and comes off to me as being very loyal. The idea of open marriage is better, but Adam does not seem like the type of guy who likes to share anything, and his marriage is very clearly between Adam and Eve. That controlling personality indicated by the story book leads me to see him as likely having some jealousy and possessiveness (though not in extreme ways).

5. The only other option is Lucifer sleeping with Eve after her death and if she goes to hell, since we know Adam and Eve lived a thousand years married together on Earth, starting humanity. But I don’t see any reason for this. We need much much more information about Adam and Eve’s relationship and all four of their relationships’ to each other in general first before we can talk more about this. But until then, I don’t see any reason to break up Adam and Eve unless there’s some importance to it in the narrative. For me, I see Adam’s womanizing in heaven as a sign that Eve is probably not in heaven. And thinking that he’ll never see her again because “Hell is forever,” he eventually becomes bitter and jaded over thousands of years and decides that his relationship with Eve must be over then. Possibly the same case with Eve in hell, somehow leading up to sleeping with Lucifer. But considering she’s no where to be found with L/L and Lucifer only references her once, there seems to be zero indication of anything between them.

6. To briefly touch on the idea that once in heaven, Eve eventually left Adam because of his horrible personality and womanizing. This is still possible, but it seems like WAY too big of a personality shift to go from married and raising a family for a thousand years to suddenly being a massive asshole and a philanderer. Something must have happened that magnified all the worst aspects of his personality. There’s no way he is the same today as he was in Eden or on Earth. If he is, that’s just shitty lazy writing on Vivzie’s part and Adam is nothing but a one dimensional villain with no depth at all. Massive waste of a character with huge potential.

Tl;dr This post is already too long so I’ll just summarize everything. Although I agree that Adam is definitely an arrogant and annoying villain, Lilith and Eve cheating on adam is unjustified imo, there is no reason for Eve to cheat on Adam or leave him at all from what we can tell now, and her having any relationship with Lucifer also makes no sense considering what his choices turned her life into. But let me know your thoughts on all this, if there’s some point you want to make or a disagreement on something else!

[madam-o]

Re the weird divide in the Beetlejuice fandom, which I really don't get

Fandom is so strange. Just liking Beetlejuice himself as a character has invited all manner of unusual kinks and personal interests into the fandom, and hey, the more the merrier. Beetlefans and netherlings are an assembly of interesting weirdos, so like, you do you. And obviously, this means that you should try not to judge or make assumptions about others based on your own feelings about their interests. Riiiight?

So, Beetlebabes as a ship has been around since the beginning of the fandom, and it certainly seems likely not to be going anywhere with the sequel. Now, my own personal stance on the pairing lies straight in the middle. I think Lydia and Beej have a beautiful friendship in the animated series and musical. They're such a great comedic duo and there's something very pure and sweet about this girl and her bug-man. Their relationship in the musical IS colored by the fact that they're both using and tricking each other a lot of the time, but they seem to have a mutual respect on this point and don't let it ruin their friendship, well until the topic of moms comes up, anyway.

In the movie, it's more complicated. BJ is motivated primarily by his desire to be free and couldn't care less about Lydia's problems. He also gets just a tad creepy with Lydia, though he's not over the top about it. He claims that he thinks that she "really understands me", which is a frickin weird thing to say about a kid who you talked to for like five minutes. But the pervy implications are kept to a minimum so as not to drive the movie into darker territory. His motivations are still kept as primarily a green card thing, although the viewer is still pretty grossed out by the forced, child-bride marriage.

Re BJ, I don't see him as a human or someone who really follows human rules. He's a supernatural creature who has a vague, outsider's understanding of what being human means. Even interpreting him as a ghost and not a demon, he's too different from a human to remember what being one is like. In the musical and cartoon, he relates to Lydia from a child's pov, but tries to behave like an adult with the Maitlands. He's neither, though. He's an unliving, essentially immortal Thing. And while Lydia clearly has a lot of affection for "her monster", she's not exactly into this gross, stinky, creepy old guy. As for BJ, he's very attached to Lydia, perhaps unhealthily so, but he's not being a sexual predator with her.

However, as a Beetlefan, I've seen that it's pretty natural to pair the two up romantically. I certainly shipped them as a kid. And yeah, it's kind of a weird ship, but Beetlejuice as a concept is just weird, period. Weirdness and age gaps are hardly anything new or unique in any part of the internet. Teen fans ship characters their own age with much older characters all the time, and it's not usually frowned upon. But in the Beetlejuice fandom, there appears to be a lot of ship-shaming and accusations of p3d0ph1lia when it comes to this teen/ancient monster pairing, which I'm guessing is a lot more of an internet drama thing than about the actual pairing itself.

Now to be clear, I don't ship teen Lydia with anyone, but I also acknowledge that she's not gonna stay a kid and that things could change between them.

Personally I like the idea of Lydia and BJ being reunited after spending several years apart and things being super weird and tense based on their history. I've become primarily a fan of the relationship dynamic they have in the musical, so I see them as being distrustful of each other and competitive about getting one over the other. But they still gel in a unique way, and they can't help but enjoy their messed-up frenemy thing. And I think the awkwardness of the teen bride thing should be leaned into rather than forgotten or brushed away.

Lydia (to BJ): You really fucked me up, you know. I was just a sad kid who you manipulated. You fuckin creep.

BJ (to Lydia): Yeah but at least I didn't literally STAB YOU THROUGH THE HEART, so...point to me, there.

This type of prickly, antagonistic relationship is like catnip to me, honestly. So it's pretty disappointing and sad that all this fandom drama crap can and probably will affect my ability to share and enjoy beetlebabes content because "beetlebabes dni" appears on so many profiles and posts. It's the kinda thing that makes fandom culture such a double-edged freaking sword. Why can't people ever just let people enjoy the thing they like and try to be respectful of each other, ya know?

[laughtalelogs]

in the shadows of buffalo bay- ch. 1

word count: 3.3k+

Zoro x afab!Reader x Sanji, cowgirl!reader, no use of y/n, no beta reader, all my reader characters are black even if not explicitly stated. if that's not ur jam, then don’t read!

Rating: M, MDNI 18+ (smut will be in future chapters, labelled as Explicit.)

Warnings: themes of alcohol, drug use, smoking, mental health issues, implications of self-harm, and violence to come.

Summary: Zoro is hot and bothered right after Wano, thinking about recent events and the man he hates the most. A new arrival shakes things up, making him more apprehensive, and angry.

chapter Index- prologue, ch.2

the prologue is recommended; but not required reading.

chapter 1 - The devil went down to buffalo bay

Zoro squinted at the mirages on the horizon and leaned back under the Sunny’s deck tree, hoping to find relief from the heat—which was doing a piss-poor job at it. The thick syrupy air and the bleary sun caused slick sweat to coat every inch of his hot skin. It didn’t help the knot that had formed at the base of his skull. He swung his arms up behind his head and rubbed the tender sore with his fingers.  He couldn’t figure out which was more annoying—the heat or the throbbing ache.

On any other day, the sea breeze would’ve helped cool him off after such a rough morning. Being aboard the brigantine normally made even the blistering heat of the Grand Line bearable. But here, on this humid scrap of dirt, grass, and jagged rock they dared to call an island, the Sunny sat dead in the center of it, far from the cooling relief of the water.

He grimaced but kept his jaw tight, forcing himself to relax. The last thing he wanted was to draw the Doctor’s attention — Chopper wasn’t faring much better, anyway. Zoro’s gaze shifted toward the deck stairs, where Usopp and the tiny doctor were dramatically draped over one another, pitifully squeezing water onto each other’s heads. The liquid evaporated almost instantly in the oppressive heat.

Zoro clicked his tongue, his eyebrows furrowing as another sharp thrum pulsed through the knot in his head as he let his mind wander. Serves them right, he thought grimly. It’s partially their fault we’re stuck here in the first place.

Their genius of a captain in the middle of the night grabbed two of his even smarter crewmates to Coup De Burst onto land. The same land that they were set to explore that morning. The land that they were only 4 kilometers away from, from what Nami calculated before she went to bed. But no, the call for adventure — no —food, was too great. 

Feeling more cynical than usual, he hoped the tattered flyer Usopp found on the ghost ship was a dead end. The sun made its way across the sky, shining down on the sparse field. Beyond the patchy clay valleys, plateaus jutted out from the sea of green and maroon. For a land promising tourism, it looked pretty dead.

Maybe, he was right, then. Hopefully, he'd wake up again just as Franky figured out some miracle to return them to the sea, and that damn cook would have his onigiri ready. A side of cold sake served with a fresh ‘I told you so’ for the rest of the crew to chew on sounded like exactly what he needed.

He cursed under his breath and breathed in the hot air. Why the hell did he keep thinking about curly brows now of all times? His thoughts had been swimming ever since Wano. He tried to drop it, but something about the tension between them felt different now—more candid, somehow. Zoro hated it. Scrunching his eyes closed, he stretched out his straining leg muscles. It was showing, in a more intense way than usual, and Zoro found himself looking like an idiot in front of the other man. 

Before leaving with Nami to see if the flyer was a hoax, the dumbass squad—including the captain—were stuck on the boat, along with Robin, Brook, and Jinbei. They were forced to stay behind as punishment for their earlier antics, while Franky stayed to assess the damage to the ship. Zoro had slept through the  decision, and they hadn’t bothered waking him. He only noticed when he heard the familiar footsteps draw near and he reached out, grabbing the cook’s leg as he passed under the tree where Zoro sat. 

Sanji stopped mid-step, his eyebrow arching in confusion as he glanced back. “Hey, let go, you idiot—”

 “—Are you good?”  Zoro’s voice was low, and he immediately regretted how it sounded. His grip on Sanji’s pant leg stayed firm, defiant.

Sanji’s face scrunched in disbelief before it melted into his usual smugness. “I’m just fine, thank you very much. Did you hit your head, Moss, or are you just going to miss me that much?” 

Zoro refused to reply, glaring instead as Sanji gave a sharp tug, yanking his cuff free. The cook smoothed the tiny wrinkle Zoro had caused, dragging his hand down the length of his leg. The fabric strained slightly over his thigh before relaxing as he let it drop. Typical, Zoro thought. Always worried about his stupid clothes. 

“As if,” Zoro muttered, forcing a scoff through the thudding in his chest. “Go ahead, get yourself killed for all I care. Just don’t make a mess.” The words came out harsher than he intended as he leaned back against the tree, shutting his eye tightly. A dull throb pulsed at the back of his skull.

“Fuck you, asshole.” Sanji’s voice was sharp, as he turned to continue to follow Nami who was impatiently waiting by the ladder. 

“Take Luffy with you,” Zoro adds, though he already knew the idiot wouldn’t listen. “Bad idea to leave him on the ship, he’s gonna leave anyways.”

“It’s Nami’s call, not mine.” Sanji’s back stiffened as he paused, then looked over his shoulder, his tone clipped.” And if you want to blame anyone, blame those idiots for getting us stuck here in the first place.”

Zoro exhaled a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding, his chest tightening with irritation—or something worse. Good riddance, Curly. Hopefully, the idiot would find something in town to distract himself and stop being such a pain in the ass. It had been three hours since then, and two hours since Luffy bolted off after getting bored. Was the island really that large?

Chopper’s whine through Zoro’s foggy thoughts, “When will they be back? It’s too hot, I’m going to die before I get to try any of the candy,” 

“I told you to sit inside with Jinbei,  Brook, and Robin,  if you were going to complain,” Zoro chided. He doubted there was any food in general. 

The door to the galley way opens, and Robin walks quickly to the banister. She peered over the edge, looking down at Usopp and Chopper’s situation with pity.

“It’s quite hot today, isn’t it?”  She brings a hand to cover her eyes from the rays, “Usopp, would you happen to still have any of those breath dials?”

 Usopp with a sudden burst of renewed energy jumped and spilled the water onto the ground. He startled  Chopper, who almost fell if it weren’t for the hands that sprouted next to him and catched him gently. 

Chopper wheezed in excitement, unphased and excited about her proposition, “Robin, that’s such a good idea!” 

“An astute observation from Robin yet again! I think I have just the right thing in my workshop,” He scratches his chin as the gears turn in his brain, “We’re off, Chopper!” 

And a clobbering of leather boots and hooves scrambled away, going down the ladder to the lower part of the ship.  Zoro thought back to the cool air that emitted from the shell. His lips twitched upwards. 

  "No calls yet?" He turned to Robin, who stood looking far off into the distance.

Robin shook her head. "No, which makes me think our Captain hasn’t caught up to Ms. Navigator and the Cook."

"I told that idiot cook he might as well take Luffy with him. He wasn’t going to stay put for long."

Robin hummed impartially, her gaze fixed outwards, her thoughts dancing in her eyes, though she didn’t seem keen on sharing just yet.

Zoro sighed. "Classic, they went and got themselves lost again, leaving it up to us to find them."

 Trying to gather the energy to move, he relaxed one last time, looking up at the clear sky. Zoro began to debate whether to take a dip in the fish tank and swim with Jinbei, who seemed to be taking the heat just as badly as the rest of them.

So much for a break, he thought. 

Before he could succumb to the exhaustion the dreadful heat pressed on him, he felt a small tremor underneath him. 

The subtle thrum became stronger by the second, vibrating the deck and earth around them. His head beat loudly in his ears, his heartbeat ever present. He tried to push back the overwhelming presence creeping closer and closer to him. Robin gripped tight on the rails as she lost her footing underneath the pressure of the Haki. Zoro hesitated for a moment. He quickly decided that Sunny was more important right now. 

The hair on his neck stood on end. Without a second thought, he reached for the hilt of his blades, trying to suppress the excitement in his veins. He stood up and ran to the center of the ship, gripping the woven material of his blades as a chill made its way down his spine like a needle grazing over the skin. Someone powerful was coming their way. He peered off in every direction.

Fuck, where was it coming from?

His eyes land on billowing clouds of red dust that barreled in their direction. He squinted, watching the blob get closer. There was no mistake in these barren fields — it was headed straight for them.

"Looks like we got company, bro!" Franky yelled from a distance, who’d been working diligently on the hull of the ship all morning.

"I can see that, I’ll handle it," Zoro said back, watching whatever beast approached, barely making out the outline. Was that a cow?

"I guess nap time’s over," he muttered, jumping off the ship for the first time. The crunch of the red clay beneath him was harder than he’d expected. He strolled closer to the dust cloud approaching, rolling his neck, blocking out the pain he felt.

 He looked closer. The challenger began to come into view through the haze of dust and dirt. The distinct rumbling of hooves on the ground confirmed his suspicions, but this beast was large. Its size became more noticeable as it got closer. That didn’t bother Zoro. He’d slain many beasts. He could see clearer now, the horned bull tugged back by the large ring in its nose, reins attached from either side. His gaze traveled up, his eyebrow raised out of pure curiosity.

A woman?

She sat on the back of the massive beast with an air of indifference, her gaze fixed elsewhere, not even sparing a glance in his direction. Her legs were casually crossed, and her hat was drawn low, casting a shadow over her eyes. Wild hair billowed beneath it, flowing, dark tresses like a cloud in the wind. She was dressed in dark  leather and denim, the harsh sun reflecting off her tanned skin. Two guns rested on either side of her wide hips, a silent warning. As she closed the distance, she effortlessly tugged the reins bringing he beast to a dramatic halt, mere feet away from the ship. 

The bull bellowed, its roar piercing the air, right in Zoro’s face. The roaring pain in his head persisted, but he forced it down. His eyes narrowed as he instinctively reached for Enma. She seemed like the perfect target to test his one-sword style with the new blade. The way she flaunted her skill, like this was some kind of game, already pissed him off.

 Another show-off who’d be easily cut down. He can’t help but smile at the idea of humbling her. He unleashes his own haki, a warning as she continued her steadfast approach.

His eyes caught the white gauze wrapped around her finger that stopped at her wrist, clothed fingers absentmindedly fiddling with metal between them. Her gaze flit to him, finally acknowledging his presence. She carried herself with confident, nonchalant approach, that gave way under her intense, dark eyes. The tension between them hung thick in the air, the swirling dust cloud that surrounded them settling around the Sunny. They silently sized each other up, and for a moment, he considered cutting her down, right then and there. Bu, she hadn’t made her move yet. Not yet. Zoro tilted his head back.

“What do you want?” he demanded, his tone sharp, watching as she uncrossed her legs. A small, almost dismissive chuckle leaves her lips,  eyes flickering with amusement.

“Well, hello to you, too,” She stretched haphazardly, raising her arms above her head as if Zoro was the most boring thing she could be entertaining right now, He scowled. "I should be asking you the very same thing, pirate." She replied simply. “-I suggest you leave now, if you’re smart.”

 “A woman with a bull and a pair of guns… You think you can scare me with that?” Zoro chuckled darkly. "If you were any good, I’d already be bleeding by now."

She raised an unimpressed eyebrow, pocketing the small, silver item in her palm. “Ya sure you wanna pick this fight? I can do worse than make you bleed,” 

Suddenly, he felt it. The slow building of an ever-present Haki crept up his neck. The prickling sensation ran his blood cold, and he felt adrenaline trill through every nerve in his body. That type of power only had one pure desire: murder. He reflexively reached for Enma to unsheathe it.

It all happened in a flash. One second, he was grabbing for his blade, pulling it out as he felt his own power surge forth into the steel, ready to hack the woman and her bull down. The next second, her gun was drawn, and the shot rang throughout the valley.

Zoro went to dodge the lead, slicing through the air, when he realized what she had been aiming at. Zoro tried to adjust his torso, but the bullet came barreling quicker than he had expected. Before he could fully react, she made a swift motion with her hand still on the reigns.

The massive bull roared again, stomping  its hooves hard into the ground. A  shockwave sent a violent dust cloud swirling into the air, momentarily obscuring Zoro’s vision. The dust storm clouded the already heavy atmosphere, making it harder for Zoro to track the bullet’s trajectory. 

At that moment, Zoro’s world turned to chaos—the thick dust in his eyes, the rumbling hooves, and the overwhelming presence of that woman and her beast. 

The bullet came crashing down with a deafening crack, and struck Enma at angle. The impact sent a jarring vibration up his arm. The force of the bullet sent a sickening crack through the air.  Bullet barreled against his sword, and Emma sent a sharp shock through his grip, nearly sending the blade flying out of his hands. The chip was deep, nicking the edge of Enma in a way that made his stomach drop. The sting of the blade's damage only added to the tension in his chest, heightening his frustration.

"Fuck!" he seethed, tightened his grip on the hilt, anger rising by the second. 

"You’re really in for it now—how the hell am I supposed to fix this?" he yelled, his anger flaring, as he inspected his blade quickly.  Humiliation bubbled beneath the surface of his burning skin.

The stupid headache combined with the heat was getting to him, no doubt. He felt his chest tighten, his expression growing darker as his fears crept to the forefront of his mind. What if he was unable to take her down? He pushed that thought away immediately, deepening his stance and getting ready to lunge.

“Is that really how to treat the sheriff of this here island?” She held her hands up defensively, gun loosely dangling between her fingertips. She tutted under her breath. "You pirates really are all the same, huh, no honor at all.”

“And what would you know about honor, with a cheap shot like that?” Zoro said between his teeth. The chip in Enma made controlling the blade’s Haki harder, forcing him to grit his teeth against the strain as he worked the blade back under his command. She'd pay for that. 

“Cheap? I like calling it creative.” She bites back, flashing a plastic smile. “You’re the one who drew first, I was just quicker. Bet that’s something you’re not used to," 

“-You don’t know a damn thing about me, or honor,” Zoro snapped, fury bubbling over as his fingers twitched toward his other blades, as he searched for any opening. You could be cut down, just like anything else. 

“Zoro, stop,” Robin’s sharp voice cut through his focus. She stepped into his line of sight, raising one hand in warning.

“Give me one good reason,” he growled, his eyes locked on her like a predator tracking prey.

Robin’s tone was calm but firm as she approached the edge of the ship, addressing her directly. “You said you’re the Sheriff of this island?”

Mystery woman winked at Zoro, a gesture that made his blood boil even more, then turned her attention to Robin.

“Yes, ma’am, that’s me,” she beamed. “Though I’d say welcome, we’re not exactly open for tourists—especially of your profession.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Zoro snapped.

Her gaze flickered to him, her hands flexing around her pistol that was drawn low. “It means, this here island is under marine protection,”

“I don’t see any of ‘em around here,” Zoro retorted, 

“And that's dependent on me.” An edge of irritation flares in her voice, commanding and defiant. Zoro frowns deeper. She was definitely trouble. “I’m no marine, though,” She adds.

“We really aren’t here for trouble,” Robin cuts in again, before Zoro could say anything else. “ We actually had found a flyer for a fair, tell me, is this Buffalo Bay?” 

Zoro’s irritation burned hotter as your grin faltered, and holstering your weapon. Did you not find him worthy of continuing the fight?

“This is Buffalo Bay,” the mystery woman said gesturing around wistfully, “but we haven’t had a fair in twelve years.”

“Knew it was too good to be true,” Zoro muttered, his pounding headache flaring again.

Her head snapped toward him, eyes dark and stormy. For a moment, she leaned closer, as if preparing to deliver a cutting remark—but before she could speak, the clatter of boots and hooves broke the tension.

“Wait—wait, we’re back!” Chopper’s voice broke through the tense silence, followed by a dramatically underwhelming entrance by him and Ussop.

“Behold! The ultimate cooling machine!” Usopp, grinned ear to ear, brandishing a lopsided contraption that whirred pitifully. Zoro resisted the urge to groan.  “Chopper helped me perfect it!”

Chopper nodded enthusiastically, only for the device to sputter and die in a puff of smoke. The tiny reindeer’s ears drooped, as they said there, unmoving. “Well… it was working.” 

Usopp blinked, finally taking in the scene. His gaze darted between the new stranger, the massive bull, and Zoro’s tense stance before settling on Robin.

 “Uh, did I miss something? Who’s this chick?”

She chuckled softly, lifting a hand in a polite wave. “Hiya.”

Zoro actually groaned this time, “Don’t trust her Usopp,”

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” Usopp’s knees wavered, and his teeth threatened to chatter. Chopper, too, shifted nervously behind him. 

“I guess anyone and anything can be a pirate, these days,” She quipped, earning a sharp glare from Zoro, who bared his teeth in response. “They’re none of your business.”

She waved her hand dismissively, like swatting away an annoying fly. “While I’d love to stay and chat all day, y’all might want to get out of this heat. It’ll kill you if you’re not careful.” She tugged on the  bull’s reins, shifting her grip. “You’ll need to head into town—supplies, repairs, food, the whole deal. Lucky for you, I’m feeling generous today. Follow me, and don’t dawdle.” 

With a sly smile, she turned and spurred the bull forward, leaving in a cloud of red dust, too fast for anyone to follow behind. 

Zoro squinted after her, her words lingering like a challenge he wasn’t ready to walk away from. The biting edge he’d felt last night—the creeping sense that something about this was all wrong—was too undeniable to ignore. As he sheathed Enma, the faint resistance from the chip in the blade only sharpened his resolve. At the root of it all was her.

a/n- First chapter down! The next one will be in Sanji's POV, I promise, yours is coming soon than later! I hope you enjoy, I know I was late. Hopefully I'll have chapter 2 out sometime this week. Please make sure to like, comment, and reblog! - lynn

[cxtangerina]

k2 is such a funny ship to me, like it's just plausible enough to be kinda sorta realistic if you squint and pray and look at it sideways, not quite a crackship but not able to get off the ground as more than a particularly popular rarepair either. they had, like, one big episode together back in season 3, a handful of major moments over the years that people hold onto with an iron grip, and basically nothing else outside of a plethora of fantastic fancontent and dreams.

i think i like it for the exact opposite reasons that i like kyman, actually, they sorta stand as complementary ships in my mind. where k2 barely has any actual basis in canon & comes heavily from fanworks and speculation about how well the characters would match each other, kyman is practically canonical, at least when it comes to cartman's feelings, and is at least regularly joked about and referenced in-show. personally, i also tend to see k2 as a ship that is kinda miraculously requited, whereas kyman is usually stuck in unrequited hell, which...

...well, this gets into more specific character analysis, but a big part of this is that i tend to see cartman as having very fucked up views of both romance & sexuality that have especially interesting implications when you consider him to have a crush on kyle, specifically.

on the one hand, i think his cupid self is evidence enough that he has a very fairytale, idealized view of romance, based more out of the hollywood movie image of what love is supposed to be rather than anything in reality. south park adults being utter fucking idiots 99% of the time means that most, if not all, of the kids don't have a lot of good role models to base their actions off of. i'm not gonna talk out of my ass about childhood development more than i understand it, but i don't think it's too controversial (?) of a take to claim that kids understand & learn about the world through watching it just as much as interacting with it, particularly when it comes to their own parents.

cartman is a piece of shit, and while a lot of that comes from him and his own bigotry, he's still ultimately a kid in show and you can trace where some of his worst traits originate from in the people around him, even if he makes the personal decision to push it as much as humanly possible. i think the trend in recent seasons for many adults to try and at least appear more pc only makes this more obvious, actually (coughcoughrandy), though talking about that is maybe biting off a little more south park politics than i'm willing to chew for this particular post.

point is, cartman as a character in particular does not have a lot, if anything, to base his idea of what a healthy, happy romantic relationship looks like, which isn't only because liane is single though that may be a major contributing factor. love isn't work to cartman, it isn't about the maintenance of a relationship or communication or all the more realistic and slightly less pleasant parts of loving someone that hollywood doesn't find dramatic or interesting enough to show. rather it's a fantasy, something that happens to people that they have no real control over. i wouldn't be surprised if he believes in soulmates or love at first sight, even if the likelihood of him admitting that out loud isn't especially high.

on the other hand, i think his view of sexuality is greatly influenced by not just liane's sex work, but the way she is slut-shamed and treated like garbage by the rest of the town for it. i tend to view cartman as having a very transactional, cynical view of sex and sexuality, where sex is only used for personal gain (whether that be money or power, likely at the expense of someone else/the submissive party), and sexuality is an inherent character flaw, a weakness that must be overcome unless you are able to twist it and use it for your own (material?) benefit- see the streaming wars & cartman wanting his mom to seduce a rich man for money as a recent example of this.

it's a running gag in TFBW that cartman uses douchebag catching their dad fucking their mom as a tragic backstory, and doesn't seem to understand how reproduction actually works even when kyle basically says it straight to his fucking face. even as a joke, there's still a lot of underlying truth behind why he would believe this. cartman is aware of his mom's sex work, even if he may not want to fully admit/believe it, largely because of situations where he's specifically getting shit for it. he knows he has a father, and that he is (in)directly responsible for said father's horrible death & consumption, but he only really cares about that insofar as it means he's half ginger. sex has only ever been presented through its most vicious power dynamics to him- why would he see it as a good thing, as something that could ever be loving, especially when contrasted against such an idealized, purified view of romance?

(you could also extrapolate from this how cartman associates sexuality & romance with femininity & his brand of sexism to get some particularly delectable transfem cartman ideas, but i digress.)

ANYWAYS. this is all to say that cartman having a crush on kyle (or anyone, really, but kyle is obviously the most emotionally volatile example) instantly pits those two conflicting views against one another, like he wants something that he doesn't even think could ever exist: a happy, healthy romantic relationship, where sex is just a normal thing that they can choose to do or not. this is where a lot of kyman angst comes from for me, with cartman either trying to stuff that round desire back into the square hole of how he views the world, or having his ideals fall ever further apart when the feelings are unrequited. and, on top of that, none of this being actually said out loud because communication is impossible.

this is why i always see kyman as making each other worse, especially if they actually manage to make it into a romantic relationship. i simply Do Not see kyle being a patient enough person to help cartman work through the intricacies of all of his expectations and idealized fantasies and internalized fears surrounding such mutually screwed views of romance & sexuality- on the rare occasions that kyle does show some interest in romantic relationships it's usually pretty centered around himself, and to be frank i only see his interest in romance going down as he gets older.

i've heard some people talk about kyle before like he's the "moral compass" of south park or whatever and while that may be true by the end of the episode, one of the things i like most about him is the fact that he struggles so much to get to the best conclusions. this is kind of getting back into the k2 side of this analysis, but where kenny manages a much more effortless selflessness, even pushing it to the point of being both a strength and a flaw when kenny stops caring about himself for the sake of others, kyle is a lot more self-centered than he cares to admit and it influences a lot of his attempts at being a good person.

this is both my favorite aspect of kyle, that he really has to put in the work to be the good person that he wants to be, and also the primary bad trait that i think cartman brings out of kyle. by being such a notoriously horrible shithead, he gives kyle the perfect target to unleash his annoyance on, getting him so caught up in arguing and proving himself to be the better person that kyle forgets to actually listen to the people that he's supposed to be standing up for. cartman is a fantastic troll and, at least in show, kyle definitely has not learned to stop feeding him argument fodder yet.

sidenote: about kyman entering a romantic relationship... wasn't sure where to add this, but it's for this exact reason that i also see kyman (or this version of kyman where cartman gets worse with age, rather than better) only actually happening in the universes where kyle has lost all other meaningful connections, to the point that feeding a troll to get off on an argument is the best possible option, even if he's old enough to know better. especially if he's old enough to know better.

again, k2 is the opposite of this for me in that i see kyle & kenny as having a lot of potential to bring out the best in each other.

if kyle's worst trait is that he gets too caught up in his own feelings & desires to truly be the good, selfless, thoughtful person that he wants to be to actually do genuine good for the sake of others, kenny's problem is that he skews too far in the opposite direction. i kinda already said this, but to state it outright: kenny's biggest strength and his biggest flaw are the exact same, that he is selfless to a fault, to the point of consistently putting other people's safety and happiness above his own when he thinks it would be of help the majority/the people he loves. this was the key kenny trait that was established by the end of BL&U, and it has only gotten more prominent in the years since with his mysterion persona.

it is in this way that kenny both stands as someone that kyle can look up to & admire for how effortlessly he dedicates himself to the people he cares about the most, but also, simultaneously, as someone that kyle can take care of himself and offer the same help back to. and i don't even think kenny needs to say very much out loud to push kyle towards a lot of these conclusions, he kinda just has to exist and be noticed and kyle has the intelligence to figure it out himself, to recognize the shit that kenny puts himself through and his (usually) quite noble reasons for doing so, and want to offer him the same love and care and dedication that kenny never allows himself to have.

really, the difficult part of this is being noticed at all in the first place. again, i said earlier that k2 is kinda "miraculously requited," in my mind, specifically because the aspect that's missing in the show and almost always must be provided by fan content for k2 is that spark/push forward that gets them close enough to start talking and for kyle to notice kenny in the first place. it's just lucky that's one of my favorite things to figure out and write for those two, hehehe.