#it's a bad gender day guys
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useless-anxiety-cucumber · 9 months ago
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in another life, I think I'd be an english major.
Somewhere, in the midst of parallel universes and timelines, there's a version of me who gets to write, and wonder, and dream.
There's a version of me who doesn't have to pretend. one who can wear waistcoats and boxers and ties.
Somewhere in the universe there's a version of me who doesn't have to hold on to the vestiges of who I once was. There's a version who can change, and make mistakes, and grow as a person.
There's a version who doesn't have to become a neurosurgeon, who doesn't have to go to stanford or harvard, who doesn't have to be the perfect daughter.
There's a me out in the universe who gets to wear tweed and sweater vests and look dorky as hell, but he doesn't care. They get to spend their days writing poetry, and debating philosophy, and teaching the next generation to dream. He gets to be transmasculine and nonbinary, and not care about what their parents think.
That universe, however, is not this one.
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bunnyboy-juice · 5 months ago
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year ago
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So like I just went through almost all your language posts and I was wondering what if like the creator sometimes just switches languages out of no where and everyone is just like:😃. Cuz like they don’t understand what they mean and it happens randomly too or when they’re irritated and they just start cussing in like 3 different languages at once
IM SO SORRY TO DO IT TO YOU-
but i think ive written some stuff abt this before?
u know what tho.
ive got an even better idea. my “go-to” if you will.
Torture Alhaitham.
>:)
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^^^ ALHAITHAM RUNNING U DOWN AFTER YOU SAY EXACTLY (1) WORD IN ANOTHER LANGUAGE HE’S NEVER HEARD-
Sun: Gender neutral Reader (you/they/them)
Orbit: SHORT headcanons-ish?, Language shenanigans!
Stars: Alhaitham (suffer lol)
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: None Known & Trigger Warnings: None Known.
he’s watching you. constantly.
he’s always writing about you.
he’s following you around Sumeru City.
he’s following you around Port Ormos.
he’s at your house-
Alhaitham learns you speak multiple languages before any other akademiya schloar, and he’s submitting a thesis about “the Greatest Lords languages from their home world”
before you can even say “I’ll think about it” in any language u know lol
people have definitely mistaken him as your favored acolyte (not that he does much to deny it)
and talk to him like he’s your secretary?? …oh, welp.
Alhaitham knows your schedule for the next month within a week of following you
mans is willing to do the MOST to get you to sit down and just start talking in a language at him
want food? his specialty dish ingredients are always at the ready at his house
want literature? he’s offering to literally break into the akademiya (or giving you a copy of his house key to have access to his personal library all the time)
(tho kaveh is practically hugging you to his chest as you walk around perusing as he talks ur ear off lmao)
Haitham (he sometimes insists you call him when it’s just you two) wants to singlehandedly be the first person who understands every word you say when u coo at dogs in another language
or cuss out a fictional character for being stupid
CRYING U CANT EVEN GET MAD AT HIM BC
every time u get pissed he’s interrupting every other word you say to ask for definitions/clarifications of slang 😭
send help he’s made a red string theory board of all the languages you’ve used to try and just- make sense of all their rules and when you use them and how to tell the difference and oh no-
Alhaitham’s hanging pictures of you mid-sentence with ur mouth open or even worse when ur yelling.
…u know maybe its not for an akademiya project, maybe he’s just trying to humble you. 💀
thanks again for sending this ask in!! :D
language sagaus my beloved <3
tbh i have likeeeee 54 things in my drafts rn? so needless to say im slow, BUT IM SO HAPPY U GUYS GAVE ME THIS MUCH TO FAWN OVER, REQUESTS OR NO <333333333333
:]
an iced coffee? for me?? :O
Safe Travels Ariasdream,
💀♒
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks
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I am a boy. What I do or do not wear changes absolutely nothing, because I am a boy. Whether or not I have boobs and a vagina changes nothing, because I’m a boy. Nobody can take that from me.
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batmasc · 8 months ago
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totally-sapphic-posts · 4 months ago
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Went to the hairdresser, asked for a cut that went to just above my shoulders, gave reference pictures and everything… tell me why my hair is now a pixie cut 🧍
I need a new hairdresser. Third time this year she cut my hair way shorter than I asked 🫠
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3dogbones · 6 months ago
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Papyrus say fuck day: crappy Epictale drawings before I collapse on mah bed honk sho sho sho
Epictale belongs to @yugogeer012 ily
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a-concert-just-for-me · 3 days ago
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Sometimes people online will call me ‘they’ (fair bc I don’t have my pronouns listed) and it gives me a little thrill, lmao
Like yay! If I had a choice, I would not have a body at all, so ‘they’ would fit that pretty well, I think.
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katyspersonal · 12 days ago
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Effect I've shown to have on people in this fandom from time to time that I am proud of is making them actually speak their opinions and put them in the TAGS! Like, you guys don't know how it feels, to see someone go from "no I am afraid to say a thing because I don't want to be harassed" to "fuck it we ball tonight *passionately disagrees with the takes of toxic popular people and tags the post with fandom and character* 😎"
Like... guys, this IS the way to go, okay? More of you should finally beat it in your head that bullies draw their power from people that are AFRAID of them! If nobody covered in fear before them, they'd be nothing but stupid clowns in their stupid echo-chambers that just block away from the world and eventually having no one left to torture eat their own! This is NOT the norm when people are scared to post their interpretations in the fandom for videogames that specifically demand interpretations, shamefully resort to lurking in some private Discord servers just to share their art and thoughts, stay away from discussing a character they like because too many toxic fans put their claws on them and so on! I don't understand why many people are okay with this kind of fandom experience? And so many of them are older than me or unlike me have enough reputation to make REAL difference in the fandom, why?? I don't remember who owns a blog for suggesting headcanons for Soulsborne games but iirc they allowed bullies to scare them into making a rule against suggesting headcanons about Gwyndolin's gender because "people are mean to each other so it's a nono now and Gwyndolin is only they/them now 🥺". Like.... congratulations, you've betrayed the very point of your blog, which is to share different headcanons, to do what? To cover in fear before jerks that didn't grasp the concept of "up to interpretation"? Why would you do that, instead of showing people who can't respect different interpretations that they are NOT welcomed?
I don't know, man.. it is normal for autists to care about fandom a bit too much, I suppose. I don't see it as something inherently inferior to The Reeeeeal Life uwu. And so, I just hate to see people just willingly lend the power to bullies? Of course they are going to continue to make the fandom unpleasant, if they see that they can own the place by just leaving disheartening comments, laughing at someone with their mindless sheep mutuals in a reblog or sending a couple of anon hates! But like, when I realized a few other people saw this is unfair and should not be encouraged, and started at least saying something too.. idk, it gives me hope. It is hard to explain but I think 20+ or even 30+ age category is more than enough to move past the dumb high school dynamic! Not in the passive "eh who cares about fandoms anyway, it is not worth it and I am too mature to care" way, but in the "nah I won't stand for Cool Kids and bullies and nor should others" way
#I am sorry I just#I am reaching the point where I realise some people CAN afford telling jerks to get lost#not everyone effected is just so mentally harrowed they can't handle any confrontation#some people just choose to be passive but the thing is it won't make bullies stop#and the ones effected more are young people just joining the fandom and seeing that like..#idk that liking gehrman or shipping gehrmaria is unsafe or that only certain miquella + mohg takes are 'allowed'#and yeah gender and sexuality headcanons seen as statement and you're bad if you dont see them.#I just think fandoms can be better. at least the 16+ ones or older#but only if bullies lose the authority they hold over many active passionate fans#and that authority is something we as fandom always choose to give to them ok?#not even only soulsborne fandom. just any fandom#though I guess this post is a huge hypocrisy on my end because me and my friend did-#-get absurd amount of harassment over fandomry and met a guy put into hospital by maria simps on the way#I am dead serious those evil people planned something ridiculous against him for just-#-pointing out her moral failings back when it was seen as instant misogyny#I guess I am not the best advertising for 'saying something'?#but in my defence 1) I defeated my bully and#2) the more people disapprove the better. of course two gehrman fans dont do much#now three or five or ten? thats better#besides I improved myself haven't I?#I got better at prioritizing bad behavior and not interpretation that causes it#like I am more chill about slandering gehrman or miquella these days!#but only as long as it is not used as weapon in weird moral battle or to shun 'wrong' fans#It is complicated!!! but progress was made and I'll make sense of it some time!!!#fandomry rambles
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useless-anxiety-cucumber · 7 months ago
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I think that May is a month for mourning.
You wouldn't think it, with it's deceptively clear skies and sun that pokes it's green head out again, not yet knowing how not to scorch.
As May ticks by like book pages turn and mushroom multiply, I find myself grieving what I thought I had gotten over.
I grieve my dog. I grieve my old friends. I grieve my parents. I grieve myself.
The dog is not yet dead, nor near to it, but I know that she will end, one day, and all I'm going to get is a phone call. I miss a goodbye I haven't said and never will.
My friends have grown up just like I have, on paths that since divulged, perhaps never to cross again. We have and will all spread out, each other's faces to become smudged memories we gaze fondly at in 4 years time, when we find our old yearbook and remember.
I can feel the end coming with my parents, like the calm before the massive storm that you know will raize the land. It is so bittersweet, to leave those who raised you, who threatened you, who took care of you and who disparaged you. I will think of my mom when I see heart-warmingly tacky cow decorations, and when I taste the burn of tequila, and when I have to stop myself from screaming and tearing my hair out, and when I smell acrid lye. I will think of my dad when I see pale beers, or a sweet chocolate left for someone, or an anti-abortion protest.
Myself is all that remains. I know that I must let go. I must let the little girl my vessel is puppeteering free, to exist only in the vestigial memories of childhood. But I am scared. I am scared of losing everyone I've already mourned. Somehow, it's still not enough.
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saym0-0 · 11 months ago
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hello jmart is t4t martin is no op jon is post top surgery. just letting u know. they told me themselves.
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wayfinderships · 5 months ago
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Saw this one post that was like "imagine your f/o" and it involved being called "kitten" and ew ew Nope ew-
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i-may-be-an-emu · 1 year ago
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Gender Envy
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candycryptids · 7 months ago
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Hiya! I hope you're doing well today! I love your characters and how you've structered their bios! Since Chuusday is listed first, is she technically your official WOL or is it someone else? Do you canonically have a WOL in the first place?
Also, I find it SO sweet that you and one of your partners both play FFXIV and have characters paired together ;w; Did you meet ingame or long before either of you started playing? Either way I wish you both the best!!! <3 - gardenofballads 🌻
Awaaaah! Im doing pretty ok!!! Taking time to answer this as a wind down from Emerald Weapon Ex Brain Soupage. And I’m so glad! ;W; I think I butchered one of those “Get To Know An OC” thingies- uhh… oh [this one] actually! I chopped a lot out and I think added a couple different thingums instead because there was so much to that that it felt overwhelming to try to look at let alone fill out LOL but it was a really good jumping off point uvu;
And!!! Hilariously Chuu was my First XIV Character, so she’s dear to my heart for being the first one- but she very quickly made it known being the WOL even as an AU was something of a Joke (Her character showed great reluctance and even frustration at having to do So Much World Saving, maybe a side-effect of me rushing through MSQ to catch up with my other spouse [Who plays Talia, though they’ve got less time for XIV these days ;0;] and the rest of my friends who were all EndGame already at the time in Shadowbringers fhdjfjsjfs.) So I made…… many alts. Throwing spaghetti at the wall but I have SEVERE side-character/NPC brain and kept making “supporting cast” types =w=; it actually took me like. 3? Alts before making an ACTUAL WoL with my husband (Ishi’li and Kizuna) (as of Right Meow, they’re in post ARR, but we’ve been working on Keathan and Tuesday together because Keathan was… Keathan’s first character in xiv XD so we’ve been jaunting through the story together and experiencing every inch of it so we can pick and choose what The Boys™ get up to when we wanna focus on them x3)
🥰 I knew both speece during at least high school- but I actually knew Keathan as early as Elementary school hehe 😌 tho the speece didn’t proper marry until… i’unno, 2017? (For frustrating legal reasons, I’m not legally married, but. As it goes. Someday we’ll have money to visit the one state that has legal poly marriages. Also I struggle to remember our wedding year 🫢)
Since managing to make a Co-WoL with my husband I’ve managed to make one other Alt meant to be a Solo-WoL (Mochiie) but I have to really wrinkle my brain to sink time into playing him, since I’m trying to take screenshots throughout the story at what I find to be inspiring beats xD And even still he has an alt-universe where he’s just a side-character for the ‘Main Timeline’ (where there’s a bunch of spaghetti and like 8+ confirmed WoL’s and the Msq entourage looks HILARIOUS in canon, someday I’ll get all the data together and take pictures, but I think it’ll cook what’s left of my brain x’3) [it’s less concrete than anything I’ve posted about before or I’d try to explain it ;v;’ it’s just interesting mostly to see how the story gets stretched to fit around a larger community of heroes than a solo guy shouldering the whole burden lmfao.]
🌸🌸🌸…. I also hope you’re having a lovely week @gardenofballads !!!! I am tossing flower petals into the air around you !!! Thank you for the ask and well wishes n kind words 🥺💖 🌸🌸🌸
#ask game#day-2-day#I have serious Alt Disease as well which doesn’t help much XD#tho I try to justify it by making them a variety of races/genders/classes so I’m not just making 15 similar guys in different color palettes#like some kinda smash game…. LMFAO.#it helps some tho cos they get to flesh out and add meat color and history to The Boys+Co’s adventures/histories/stories uvu like Lev….)#Solkmyna and Swydghem who are true NPC alts of mine are even slotted into post ShB…#🫢 but they’re mostly just fun for me to occasionally chew on like a squeaky toy#tangy is schroedingers WoL. both is and Isn’t. could be The WoL if the au called for it but also works perfectly as just a Scion instead#…. wordy tags… my bad… ANYWAYS FR HOPE YOUR DAY/NIGHT IS NICE AND PLEASANT#I gotta stare blankly at the ceiling now while trying to retain mechanics but not pressed against the display glass of my brain#🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💖‼️#spawn speece#also yes there is something deeply strange wired in my brain where I link to sources but not super consistently like some kinda bad wiki pag#if I had stuff for Keathan + Kizuna to link to tbh I’d link to it here too LOL.#when I get ahold of Talia and Setsuna I’ll probably make little reference posts- not really Bio’s cos they’re not my blorbs#they’re my partners blorbs; but it might be handy to have a frame of reference to point at beyond vague name dropping#actually I love linking to names because my memory is just so piss poor. why not just make it easier for everyone else also#I know I have 185756328 OC’s xbdnfjdnfsnfjs so.#I have to do this for one of my friends uvu; bad memory havers rise up
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bl00dh0rs3 · 1 month ago
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Not posting it, already reported etc, but damn. the transphobic anon i just got has more faith in me ever having a sex life than i do.
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opossumanon · 2 months ago
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The fact that the only way I can really consistently figure out what I'm feeling (gender-wise) is to wait until somebody calls me "she" and see how bothered I get by it is a little annoying ngl. Like is there a way I can realize I'm feeling like a man without having a taste of dysphoria first??
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