#it's 8:16 long fyi | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

gentlebeardsbarngrill · 10 months ago

Text

02/09/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Day 30 in the Gravy Basket; Cast & Crew Lovely Letters; Resources; Starfury Convention; Astrodglide Fic/Pic Week 18+; New Watchparties; People of Earth; Wrecked; SchadenFreude; Coyote Vs Acme; Articles; Morale; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika

Day 30 in the Gravy Basket. (FYI Long Post is LOOONG today was a very busy and long day) Well we made it folks, we made it to one month since Max cancelled OFMD and we're still going strong. Some CRAZY stuff has happened since then and some of our crew put together some fun lists of what's happened.

Thank you to @gheyandwoke on twitter for these memes:

And that's not even everything that happened! So just remember, when it feels like it's been way too damn long, A LOT has happened

== Cast & Crew Lovely Letters ==

For Valentine's Day we've set up a Kudos board for our cast & crew of OFMD! (it's on an unlimited version so make as many posts as you'd like!) You can send pictures, gifs, videos, or just text, and we'll be sharing it to them on valentine's day across as many platforms as we can.

== Resources ==

One of our crew members, Lady Penni, aka @Pellington21 on twitter was kind enough to send in a HUGE list of Positive Critic Quotes to the Repo today and they got added in. Speaking of Resources, do you have images/gifs/infographics/text you want to share with the crew? Please feel free to send them to our contact form over at the repo. @quirkysubject as well as some other crew members are being kind enough to help me get it filled in and up to date (as well as updating the accessibility) and we want to make sure if you want to share your resources you can! Let us know what name you'd like to be credited by and we'll get things uploaded! Repo Contact Form

= Starfury OFMD Fandom Convention =

So as a heads up, the first Our Flag Means Death specific event has been anounced by Starfury for Heathrow, UK 8 Nov - 10 Nov 2024. Details at www.starfury.co.uk I would like to point out as it's been brought up QUITE A BIT that it would be good to hold off buying tickets for now. Apparently Starfury is NOTORIOUS for saying certain guests will be there, when they haven't been confirmed yet (and they did that today with Rhys Darby) so it may be good to wait a bit before purchasing. This did cause some "Come to my convention" clowning for various people on twitter, which produced some fun stuff.

= Watch Parties/Events! =

= Astroglide Fic/Art Week 18+ =

You heard that right. 02/09/2024 - 02/25/2024 is Fic/Art Week

Please feel free to @Astroglide on twitter, or even here on tumblr @astroglideofficial and use the tags: #LubeAsACrew #SaveOFMD

= New Watch Parties! =

Thank you @iamadequate1 for getting these all in one place! Twitter Thread

Feb 12 - Feb 16: People of Earth S1

People of Earth is no longer on any streaming platform, but it is available for digital purchase (ex, on Amazon). If access is an issue, DM @gentlebeardsbarngrill

Season 1 watch next week from February 12th to February 16th.

Skipping the week after in case people want to participate in the n next Palestine strike.

Season 2 watch from February 26th to March 1st

Times will be 10pm GMT / 5pm EST / 4pm CST / 2pm PST.

Watch two episodes per day. Episodes are 21-22 minutes each.

Use the following Saturday for the tags/watch if interested but not able to make this time.

Hashtags:

#PiratesOfEarth

#SaveOFMD

#AdoptOurCrew

Mar 4 - Mar 8: Wrecked Season 1

Wrecked is no longer on any streaming platform, and it is not available digitally on US sites. (Apparently, it is available on German Amazon?) There are sources being passed around. If access is an issue, DM @gentlebeardsbarngrill

Season 1 watch from March 4th to March 8th.

Season 2 watch from March 11th to March 15th.

Season 3 watch from March 18th to March 22nd.

Times will be 10pm GMT / 5pm EST / 4pm CST / 2pm PST.

Watch two episodes per day. Episodes are 21-22 minutes each.

Use the following Saturday for the tags/watch if interested but not able to make this time.

Hashtags:

#WreckedPirates

#SaveOFMD

#ForOurCaptain

== SchadenFreude / Coyote Vs. Acme ==

So some crazy stuff happened today. Apparently Zaslav made a decision to not only remove Coyote Vs. Acme from Max but to shelve it so no one else could purchase it.

Wanna learn more? The Final Days of ‘Coyote vs. Acme’: Offers, Rejections and a Roadrunner Race Against Time | Exclusive

Coyote vs. Acme's Fate Might Have Been Sealed by Real Judge Doom David Zaslav

Now what does that have to do with Our Flag Means Death? Well, just like we've been seeing for weeks now the WBD stock has PLUMMETED like crazy since The Wrap article came out this morning.

It sent the following trends all over twitter: (Thank you Mich for capturing these!)

Wanna help out Coyote Vs. Acme? Please sign their petition to get it saved: Petition

Seeing this much negative press for WBD is great and shows it's not just OFMD they're cancelling, they're making crappy decisions left and right. The term "Zaslovian Blunder" was also coined today on the @saveofmdcrewmates tumblr:

*Zaslovian (adjective): to make a decision that is unanimously deemed absurd, that almost seems to purposefully damage one's reputation, company, self, and others.

== Articles ==

5 TV weddings to celebrate the 20th anniversary of same-sex marriage in San Francisco

Peak TV Is Officially Over: FX Tallies 14 Percent Drop in Scripted Series for 2023

== Morale ==

In honor of 85k signatures, our friend @lucyrosebutler on twitter shared the rest of her Cameo with Rhys. (We'll see if it explodes this post, please don't I will cry)

Full video clips on twitter.

== Morale Cont'd ==

Hey Lovelies. 30 days is a LONG time. I get that. I'm feeling it in my bones too. I want you to know it's totally normal if you are feeling frustrated, and exhausted, and just over all of this effort to get our show back.

It's okay to feel that way.

You don't need to be positive all the time, you're allowed to feel grief. I know we've grieved several times since the original announcement, but just like progress, grief isn't linear either.

It's going to come up again in waves, and hopefully those waves get smaller each time, but they will keep coming until we get our show back.

I say UNTIL WE GET OUR SHOW BACK, because despite my own frustrations, I don't really have any doubt that it will happen at this point, it's just a matter of when.

What makes me feel that way?

Chaos Dad's silence

The fact he hasn't told us to just stop cause there's no way it's gonna happen

The whole "everybody is ready to go" in Aotearoa we heard from Wee John Wondays

Rhys' continuous pile of support

The Cast and Crew being more active on social media again

The continuous positive press

and so many other little things that continue to happen that keep making it feel like we're inching forward.

I'm not an expert, I just have a feeling, based on staring at every happening that's happened over the past 30 days.

So if you need to, go grieve lovelies! Get mad, get frustrated, scream, cry, it's normal and it's healthy. You deserve to let feelings those out.

You are human, and you are wonderful, and you can't be a ray of sunshine all the time (nor should you have to be).

And for those of you who aren't grieving, and instead feeling renewed excitement, that's absolutely wonderful too. Don't feel like you have to grieve if that's not where you're at! Every one of us has a personal journey through all of this, and not one of us will share the exact same experience, so remember not to judge your progress based on everyone else.

Anyway, I'm rambling now, so on to the love notes:

== Love Notes ==

YOU are beautiful.

YOU are doing so damn well.

You are trying your best at whatever you're dealing with in your life, and you're kicking ass, no matter how much it doesn't feel like it some of the days.

You are a glorious piece of stardust, and whether you're shining bright or dim today, you are radiant.

Remember to breathe, and drink some water, and get some rest so you can keep shining.

Love you crew, hope wherever/whenever you are on this big blue marble you're doing well.

=Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika =

In honor of the Love Birds Watch Party I'm including it in tonight's theme. Idk about the Taika one, they seemed to match, or I'm just tired.

#daily ofmd recap #daily ofmd recaps #ofmd daily recap #ofmd daily recaps #ofmd #our flag means death #rhys darby #fuck david zaslav #saveofmd #save ofmd

133 notes · View notes

thoughtsandbones · 1 year ago

Text

Doth thy demons dwelleth in the darkness too, my belov'd Reaper?

🚨WARNINGS: Mention of mental health illness mention, profanity, scars, fluff, anxiety, medical inaccuracies, blood, gore and just getting the POV of our friendly neighbourhood masked menace.

I do not consent to any AI or anyone taking my work!

Plot: Doctor Ruhari Hari Kaur (OC is South Asian ☺️) joins the 141 again, but this time as their doctor. After the betrayal of Shepherd and Graves, Task Force 141 begins their hunt on his whereabouts and locating Makarov.

Word count: 6043K

Song inspo: Summer High - AP Dhillon, Don't Fear the Reaper - Blue Oyster Club, Sinner - The Last Dinner Party, The Lara Croft: Tomb Raider Legend soundtrack.

spelling and some grammar mistakes as I am bad at times... :/

(FYI: bold sentences... that are like this... are supposed to describe redacted data/info to the plot... ;] .. )

Please do let me know how you all are finding this fanfic! :D

MASTERLIST

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 15 I, PART 15 II and PART 16

Part 17

The tiny specs of dust floated amongst the surrounding atmosphere, highlighted in the beams of sunlight that penetrated your room. A few settled down on the frame still clutched in your hand, the gold frame sparkled from the light as you tilted it, staring deeper into the image of Simon. That mole on his jugular kept drawing you in, beneath the skin, the vein you thought for the past 13 years had been burnt to ash was actually flowing steadily. The deep crimson blood slithers from his brain back to his heart after all.

Could it honestly be that Ghost is Simon Riley... or Simon is Ghost... One in the same. You thought to yourself, you get up lay down on your bed, the framed photo at the tip of your round nose.

Time stood still for what felt like hours.

It would make total sense, he knew your old name. You recall the day you first met, when he said that name. The inscription of the former shell you shed. That person who you haven't been able to come to terms with. Unable to reclaim the innocence of not knowing the cruelty of mankind. The lust for war over land, oil, weapons or whatever it is people fight for nowadays...Unwilling to let go that guard you have down.

That mole drew you in again, displayed on the only available photo you have of him.

Did everyone else know...? Surely. Perhaps not... A supposed dead man displayed by a skull face was filled with irony. You couldn't help but laugh at the thought of Simon's smug face startling new and old people with this faux relic of his former self.

Checking your watch, you realise you spent perhaps too long wondering about the past. No time like the present to find out the answers to the questions that flushed through your synapses.

Gathering your selected files and papers, placing the gold frame on top, you put the lid back on the box and slide it back to its former spot. Placing the chosen contents in a spare tote bag, swinging it over your shoulder.

Glancing around your room you look at the knick knacks laying in their places. Collecting dust and time. The gemstones you once fiddled with when looking out the window laid dormant.

Heading back down, you meet Clarissa back in her car. Once back in the passenger seat, you feel a lightness overcome you.

If Ghost really is Simon Riley, then it means he had his own reasons to hide. After what brief knowledge you of have of his supposed death, a part of you understood. Yet there was a slight annoyance growing inside of you.

Clarissa noticed you pursing your lips and frowning as you lulled your head side to side with the smooth motion of the car. After contemplating whether or not to tell you about her encounter with Gaz, the cute sleauthe, to fill the quietness.

But she was reminded of your sudden snore coming from your mouth that you were a surgeon who dealt with an extremely serious injury, and then be ridiculed by the moronic Dr Jones.

As Clarissa drove up to the gate of base she called in a favour from a new friend, Kyle Garrick, to help with getting permission to drive up to the rear of building 2 so you could get back with ease to your quarters.

Clarissa was guided back to the emergency back entrance of Building 2, you woke suddenly with the familiar sound of a large tank thundering by. You rubbed the sleep from your eyes and blinked several times, trying to focus them to know your exact location.

"Go get some sleep" Clarissa said as she gazed at you as your rubbed your temple.

"Been a long day" You scoff slightly and then yawn again.

"I'm gonna talk to your Captain about Jones and get something done" Clarissa said

You had heard what she said and nodded, unable to move your jaw to let the words escape.

Exiting the car you to wave Clarissa goodbye and then make your way back up to your room. As your reach your dear you look down the corridor and see the rough outline of Ghost's door...

Taking a deep breath you open your door, the tote bag carrying the gold frame and your documents swung as you strolled into your room. Closing the door behind you, placing the tote bag on one of the hooks and then stripping off your scrubs and crawl back into bed. Gathering the strewn duvet cover from when your were first paged nearly 2 hours ago.

As you cocooned yourself your mind went back to Ghost - or Simon Riley. How 3 hours ago he was shrouded in mystery. But now... You have an idea of who he really could be...

I hope it is you Simon you plead quietly within the emptiness of your room. Your aching bones and flesh beg into sink into the mattress, sleep came quickly this evening as the heaviness of your strung out body shut down.

...

Simon took another deep inhale, his tongue became even more drier as it touched the roof of his dry mouth. Trying to moisten his mouth with saliva, he swallowed the little that came out down. He looked up and realised he had fallen asleep in the shower. The white light of the bathroom pierced his still tired eyes. Simon adjusted his body and sat up straighter, his back bracing the cold white tiles.

With his left hand he touched the now dry bandage and sighed with relief. As he got up, the wound pulsated with pain across his abdomen. Finally, he was feeling the full physical effects of the mission. Simon examined his pale naked body in the mid sized mirror.

Bruises began to appear, especially on his stomach and right shoulder. He could make out the thick red imprint of his gun strap. Brushing his fingers across his shoulder, he felt grains of sand roll against his skin. Simon resorted into having to wash himself with a damp towel and small splashes of water. All in order to avoid the bandage and the wound you stitched together from getting wet.

After feeling far more fresher, Simon wore his comfiest black joggers and socks that had a little German shepherds embroidered on the cuff. Slowly he put on a black vest and then a grey zip up hoodie, but leaving it unzipped. He laid down on his bed and took in the calm silence.

The ringing in his ears came back suddenly; tinnitus. An ever so common issue for soldiers, especially given close contact with flash grenades. Simon tried to forget the images of a bloodied Soap out of his mind, but they, along with the many demons, echoed within his mind.

Suddenly, there was a sharp rapid knock on the door, Simon knew all too well that it was Price. Gently getting up he reached for a clean skull balaclava and put it on and sliding on his trainers.

Ghost opened the door and saw Price, also showered and refreshed, not with his signature boonie.

"Alrigh' Price?" he mumbled, as he leaned against his doorframe.

"Not bad, Soap is awake" Price said, giving a slight grin, which grew as he noticed Ghost's eyes widen.

"How is he?" Ghost says grabbing his keys and moving out of his room, zipping his hoodie as Price moved out the way.

"Alive and well. You can see him, Gaz is there right now" Price said as he watched Ghost lock his door and then turned to face him.

"Let's go"

"Have a good rest?" Price asked

"Somewhat" Ghost gruffed "Can Johnny walk?" He asked

Price chuckled and gave Ghost a light pat on his shoulder

"More than that, he's dishin' out gossip to anyone who would listen" Price huffed

"Really?" Ghost said confused. Hours ago Soap was near the edge of death, and now he is gossipping.

"You have to see it for yourself" Price said

Both Price and Ghost made their way to the ICU where Soap was recovering. And recovering well Ghost assumed as he heard the sergeants laugh fill his body with ease; finally safe and alive.

Ghost approached the edge of the bed, Soap and Gaz finished their conversation before turning their attention to him. Gaz gave him a brief nod.

"Lt! You finally came!" Soap exclaimed his arms reached out, both which had ECG cables coming out him. Ghost saw the biggest grin he had ever seen coming from Soap's bruised and grazed face.

"Johnny.." Ghost mumbled

"Can yer believe that I am alive?!" Soap said, spitting out a laugh, lightly clapping his hands together "For sure thought I was dead" Soap laughed again finally resting his arms from excessive movement on his stomach.

Ghost narrowed his eyes at Soap and crossed his arms. He was acting like he had just had a small tumble and not got shot in the back.

"How's the legs?" Ghost mumbled moving closer over to Soap.

Soap gripped the blue hospital blanket, pulling it up slightly and revealing his wiggling toes. Ghost felt another wave of relief ripple through him.

"Alright Soap, put your stinkers away" Gaz said poking at Soap's feet with his charts that he was looking through earlier.

"Pfft, wanna gimme a sponge bath Gaz?" Soap grinned at Gaz who looked back him disgustingly at the thought.

"Come off it Johnny" Ghost said shaking his head at Soap.

"I was only jokin' Lt!" Soap chuckled

Ghost took in Soap's face and the shared moment of relief and serenity with Price and Gaz. The team was safe, wounded and shocked in places but back in familiar territory.

Gaz sat back down and continued to chat about who would give Soap a sponge bath, asking Price how much or what would it take... Price huffed and said something along the lines of not even if my right leg was blown off.

The conversations between the three faded as Ghost grabbed a chair and sat down, observing his comrades.

"Hey Lt, you hear about Doc?" Soap said, turning his attention to him

"Eh?" Ghost grunted looking up at Johnny with narrowed eyes

"Well, I was laying here, recovering, just woke up from the coma" He starts

'Wasn't a coma mate" Gaz said, Soap ignored him

"I hear a conversation slowly drift into my ears as I lay here recoverin'" Soap continued

"Ah he's telling the long version" Gaz interrupted and quickly went silent as Soap shot him an evil look.

"That Jones fella apparently paged Doc 999 - ICU.. Bless her soul, she must've thought I was dyin' again" Soap said sympathetically towards Ghost, whose eyes were still narrowed at him.

"Runs down here, and Doc notices my intubattery is out"

"Intubation tube" Gaz corrected stifling a laugh with his hand.

"Spit out the short version Johnny, I ain't got all day listenin' to fairy tales" He said sighing

"Pfft thought yer'd be nicer to be me since I am recoverin'" Soap spitted, point to his back.

"Basically, Jones paged Hari on the basis of doing an unauthorised surgery and said to show him her qualifications" Gaz summarised

"Oi, I was tellin' a story here!" Soap shouted, and flung a piece of apple at Gaz from his tray.

"Cut it out Soap" Price said and Soap promptly had a guilty look on his face.

"Wait, what?" Ghost said, straightening up in the chair

"Jones think she committed medical fraud" Price said

"But she saved 'im" Ghost said, throwing his hand out to Johnny

"Aye she did, oh forgot to mention the part Jones said she went psychotic at Foxham"

"Soap.." Price said sternly

"I didn't say anthin'" Soap exclaimed

"You say a lot shit Johnny" Ghost said "What you mean psychotic?" He added

"She apparently had a mental-" Soap started

"Alright, that's enough" Price stepped in "It's all been sorted" he added

"Is she leavin'?" Ghost asked, worry began to tremble through him.

What if you left before he could tell you who he was?

"No, she's staying." Price said

"Good" Ghost said aloud, then realised he said that aloud.

"Takin' a likin' to her ey Lt?" Soap said, giving him a mischievous grin.

Ghost looked away from Soap, he could feel his cheeks and neck getting hot.

"Not the only one" Gaz said, leaning back in his chair looking at Ghost and Soap with a grin. Both looked at eachother.

"I said she was pretty, I'm not in love with her" Soap shouted back at Gaz

As Gaz continued to tease Soap, Ghost got up and put the chair back

"You going?" Price asked

"Yeah" Ghost said moving closer to Price "Might see Doc, see if she's alrigh'?" He added

"She's knocked out at the moment, give her a till tomorrow" Price said and Ghost nodded.

"You goin-" Price started

"Give me 5 days." Ghost said looking straight at Price, who nodded and smiled, he gave him a light pat on the shoulder and let him go.

During the walk back to his room, Ghost made a promise to himself, to you.. 5 days, Ghost checked his watched, it was the 8th of October, 5 days would make it October 13th... He soon realised what day that was; the day The Captain died.

...

Finally after a good sleep, you were feeling slightly better. Yet the inner itch of anxiety trickled down your nerves anytime you heard the words Jones said to you...

"Heard you went psychotic whilst on shift."

Everytime that sentenced pierced your grey matter, your body shuddered, an attempt to rid the thought.

The hot droplets of water scattered across your naked body, taking your bamboo loofah, scrubbing your apple soap, creating a nice lather. You watch the bubbles accumulate as you scrub clean the sweat, the gunk trapped in crevices and bringing new life to the skin.

The fresh apple scent uplifted you, in combination with the hot shower, you felt like you could melt away...

But the oncoming thoughts of the revelation made the previous day flooded your thoughts.

Why would he take so damn long? You thought as you scrubbed over your knee and then down your calf.

But in your mind, you reasoned with yourself.. If you had been betrayed and then supposedly burnt alive you would keep that a secret. Anonymity was literally his name. Ghost

There... But not there really.

Getting out the shower, the cold morning breeze drifted into the bathroom, hitting your fresh skin.

After getting ready you made your way to the mess hall. As you locked the door, you gazed down the corridor to Ghost's room. Checking your watch it was 9:36 am, he would most likely be doing paperwork or something...

Heading down to the mess hall, it was there in the near empty hall you saw Ghost sitting alone on a lunch bench, a cup in front of him. As you both locked eyes, your mouth instantly curved into the biggest grin as you stared at the man hiding beneath the mask.

Your mischievous big grin made Ghost wary of you suddenly as he saw you walk in the mess hall, grabbing breakfast.

Something is up he thought to himself

Watching as you grabbed some breakfast, he kept his eyes on you until you sat right in front of him.

"Morning Lieutenant" You said, trying to not say Simon... Another grin appears.

"Mornin' Doc" He said, puzzled still by your big grin.

He watched as you slowly tilted your head to the side, strands your long brown hair falling too, as if you were analysing his inner workings. Trying to figure him out

"Is it your turn now doin' the starin'?" Ghost huffed, folding his arms

"Hmm perhaps" You replied

Ghost grumbled and looked down at his near empty tea in his mug.

"How's your injury?" You added as he remained silent, now it was his turn to stare at you.

"Fine. Better" He said.

"Good" You said, sucking in some air. You could feel some tension rising between you.

"Heard about Jones" He said, breaking the silence

You look at him, shocked at the bluntness.

"How did you-" You started

"Soap" Ghost said

"Soap?" You questioned "He's awake?!" You exclaimed

"Yeah, he's all good, you did a great job" He said, his eyes softened as he met your curious brown eyes.

"Good..." You say, taking a sip of coffee "What did he say about Jones?"

"Something happened at your old hospital" Ghost said, studying your face for any reaction.

"Yes..." You whispered, dreading the conversation that will follow.

Ghost took a deep breathe in.

"Tomorrow, we need to resume trainin'. Assume you've been doin' some since we've been away" He said changing the subject.

Shocked that he wasn't going to question you, you smiled briefly at him.

"Yeah, definitely, and yes, been training with the martial arts team on base too" You replied

"We shall see how well you can spar tomorrow" Ghost said.

He picked up his mug and said his goodbyes. He knew not to pressure you into giving him information he desperately wanted to know.

Within your own darkness, you seem to be hidin' your own demons too Ghost thought as he walked out.

...

It had only been a 3 days since Ghost, aka Simon Riley, had his deep wound stitched up, and yet he was persistent on picking back up the training, especially hand to hand combat training.

It was no surprise, the Simon you remember was proficient in unarmed combat. Now added with his Ghost persona, daunting others in his stride.

Each time you greeted each other in front of the training room he booked out, you'd ask him how he was.

"Alrigh'" He gruffed

That was his usual response. You didn't want to annoy him any further so you bit your tongue.

Finally, on the fourth day of training, you pinched a nerve with Ghost when you kept repeatedly asking if he was okay and if his wound be able to handle a beating or two.

"So far, I've overthrown you... 7 out of 8 times past three days" He snapped at you, blue eyes narrowed at you.

"Pretty sure it's 6" You replied bluntly as you recall the time you were jumping repeatedly to try and pull him over.

"7" Ghost retorted crossing his arms and stepping closer to you

"You are twice the mass of any normal combatant" You say rolling your eyes edging over to the mat.

"Well if you could knock me over, then it'd be easier knocking normal people" Ghost said following you onto the mat, and got into his ready position as you did the same.

He watched as your face changed, the fire suddenly lit behind the eyes as you narrowed your eyebrows. Waiting for your move, because he knew you would lunge first with a kick. And you did, he used his right arm to swat it away as if the oncoming kick was a fly. He took in satisfaction from your frustration at his easy block.

"Too predictable" Ghost muttered as he circled you slowly.

Taking a deep inhale you let out a deep sigh

"I don't have the upper body strength to take you down" You hurled back at him

"Just try it" He calmly said

Pulling your arms closer to your chest and face, jolting forward and giving a right punch. Ghost dodges.

Ghost decides to up the game and throws a punch, you duck and attempt to trip him with your legs again. He sighs and raises his leg in an attempt to kick you but you block with your right arm and side of the body, with your left arm you grab his thigh but Ghost quickly uses his upper arm to push you back - you stumble with the amount of force he put with such ease.

"Good attempt" He groaned as he stretched his neck and arms. where the muscles laid too defined under his scarred pale skin.

Meanwhile you were panting for air like anything. Walking off the mats you grab your flask and take a quick swig from it. The water replenishes the dryness of your mouth.

"Ready for another round?" Ghost asks, and you swear you heard a glimmer of laughter

Turning around placing the flask down in its own spot, wiping away droplets of water from the edge of your mouth, walking back up to the mats and face Ghost, getting back in your stance.

Lunging first again, you manage to hit Ghost and block one of his oncoming punches. Using his thigh as a stool, you jump up and twist round to his back and wrap your legs around his shoulders hooking your feet against his lower back, trying to use your core to tip him over, but you just ended spinning yourself to his front, feeling you slip, Ghost instinctively grabbed hold of your waist, keeping you from falling and snapping your neck.

"Ain't ya gonna listen to me and not use your legs?" He said gruffly

A small groan come out from your mouth.

His calloused fingers of his right hand grazed the brown skin beyond the edge of the joggers you wore. His grip around your hips tightened as he felt you relaxing your upper body, yet the grip with your legs over his shoulders remained.

He heard you panting slightly as you hung below him. Your tank top rose, unveiling more of the warm smooth brown skin. Like magnets, his eyes took in the vulnerability of your position as you hung casually.

You're gonna pounce he thought, planting himself and engaging his core, his wound although padded and nearly healed (Ghost thought) throbbed dully.

Yet you lay still. Ghost peered down at you again, his eyes laid on your breasts, between them he quickly looked at your chin and then the edge of your round nose. For a moment, he let himself glance at your breasts and then trailed up from your ribs to the protruding skin, a bronze glow as a beam of light bathed that region... Within his chest a ripple formed that gave him ease. His eyes wandered back up to the legs wrapped around his shoulders.

Taking your vulnerability to his advantage; Ghost grabs you right arm with his left and pulls you up and then over him. He heard you yell in disbelief as you were flung over him.

His right hand was no longer securely on your waist but now grasping your right inner thigh, making you lose grip over his shoulder.

Falling on your back you groaned with growing agitation as he threw you down.

"Was that necessary?" You groaned

"I ain't a damn tree" He snapped back, surveying you as you sat crossed legged down on the mat. The black tank top was perfectly fitted, showing your toned arms as you leant back. Ghost looked away and turned his back slightly

"Built like one" You muttered to yourself quietly and get back up up, rubbing your sore back and shoulder.

"Look, come here" Ghost said, rubbing his the skin underneath his mask, then motioned with his hand.

You came closer, and he took hold of your right arm gently.

"Form a fist" He said still holding your arm as you tightened the muscles lying beneath the skin.

"Good" Ghost said, and you looked up at into eyes blue eyes. Simon's blue eyes. As your eyes meet you feel a sharp zing bolt across you, quickly glancing back down to your fist, the feeling spread down to where he held your arm.

"Now, hit me with your upper arm-" He began and proceeded to move that part closer to your body "close like this" he added, and look down at you, meeting your eyes once again.

"'Kay" You sighed, engaging your core.

"Use your arms this time" Ghost repeated and gave a nod for you to go ahead.

You aim for Ghost's chest, he dodges, you attempt again to hit him with your left hand and you hit his chiseled torso.

"Good" he said "Block and defen' now" he added, and he lunged forward suddenly, delivering quick and sharp punches.

You block two, and then grab his right arm, and attempt to hurl him over, but due to his large size he remained where stood.

Thrusting your backside into him to try and get a bit of momentum, but he stood still.

Ghost felt slightly awkward as you kept getting close to his front, he felt your back, especially your bum, hitting his cock. He took a step back and turned his waist to the side, yet you followed his move in attempt to try and bring him down. With his left hand, he wrapped around your waist and lifted you up over his head.

"Not again!" You yelled as Ghost you mid air. He chuckled slightly as he brought you down but you swung your left leg around the back of his waist to try and swivel yourself out of his hold.

"Stop!" He yelled as he lost his balance and you let go of his waist with your leg, but still held onto his right arm. The sudden change in weight and momentum made Ghost fall right on top of you. Your face slammed into the mat, and lips making contact with the grit on the mat, saliva sputtered out as you groaned with annoyance and tiredness.

Ghost lifted himself off of you, he noticed your bare shoulders, as your tank top had a strap in the middle, exposing the tattoo he saw briefly one time on your left shoulder.

As you panted on the mat, Ghost stood on one knee over you and examined the different four flowers coming out of what looked like a skull. He gazed at the black monochromatic skull; an odd reflection of the skull he wore over his own.

He moved back and up, watching as your back muscles flexing as you pushed yourself up from the mat.

"Last round?" You say, wiping your hands together to get rid of the grit from the mats.

"Until you knock me over then it'll be the last roun'" He said, standing in the centre of the mat. Stretching his arms over his head and gazing back at you.

You meet his blue eyes again. Part of you so badly wanted to run up, jump and take his mask off and be huzzah! But that would be a total invasion of personal space and you figured he'd just toss you back to the ground as soon as you made any move.

Best bet is to keep on the defensive mode... Wait for him to strike

After about a minute of circling one another, Ghost struck first, punches that struck you on the side, yet you began to dodge them, delivering punches in return.

"Finally" Ghost said aloud, as he looked at your delivery of punches, few which he blocked and few a he took. He looked deep into your brown eyes, full of focus and determination.

Throwing more punches, blocking and then attacking.

"Good" Ghost said again and he swung out his right leg, doing a high kick and you block it and try to toss him over. It didn't work. Instead you let go his leg, and he swiveled trying to kick you again, you blocked and then remembered a move... A sudden rush of adrenaline charged through your blood.

With his back turned, it was then with your right leg that as you quickly crouched, hooking it around Ghost's left leg causing him to stumble, allowing you the edge to push his back with your left hand.

As Ghost fell forward he felt your hand grip his right ankle flipping him over like a pancake onto his back. Before he could fight back, you lunged on top of him, pinning his left arm with your right leg and your right hand near his throat. Your left knee was placed just on his hip, just the right amount of pressure to prevent him from getting up.

It was one of his signature moves. The surprise attack he would often use from behind.

How could you.. But then he remembered... Simon...

Him

You learnt it from him.

You kept him pinned down in the same position, forcing your entire weight on the points you held him down by. Boring your eyes into his. You could see the remaining black painting creased as he squinted his eyes at you.

"Gonna get off me?" He growled, hoping that would intimidate you.

Yet you persisted. Keeping the same stern look you stared at him. Tightening the grip you had on his right arm.

Annoyance began to grow in Ghost. But then he figured if you knew, then this was the consequences of his own making.

Your fingers were splayed against his throat covered by his skull balaclava. There was a terrible temptation to how badly you wanted to slide your fingers underneath, revealing the mole on his skin that covered his jugular.

What colour was it?

Smooth and circular or rough like potato. What shape is the mole?

As you thought of the mole, your grip began to tighten slightly on Ghost's throat.

Ghost felt his anxiety building inside as she tightened her grip on his throat.

How could I be so fuckin' stupid Ghost thought to himself, he pushed himself up but you were exerting all your strength into keeping him where he is.

"Do you know?" he croaked

"I know a lot of things, to which are you referring to?" You retorted

"Hmm" Ghost groaned, he shifted again under you, yet you remained.

"The day we first met.." You started, thinking carefully of the way you were wording your thoughts. Ghost eyes widened, becoming more attentive.

"Go on.." He said

"You said my old name, how did you know?" You asked, eyes narrowing at Ghost, hoping to catch him

"Looked through a file" Ghost lied quickly. Unable to bring himself to tell the truth.

You smirked, eyes narrowing further.

"Nah, pretty sure the Captain redacted my name"

Ghost drew all of his strength, he managed to get his right leg up and with his knee shifted his weight so that you stumbled off of him as he turned over.

"What you gettin' at?" He said getting up off the mat, lending out his right hand to help you up. You take it, and Ghost helps pull you up.

You know.. Ghost thought to himself as he watched you study his face

"I think I know who you are.." You whispered

Ghost felt a cold tinge begin within him, he crossed his arms over his chest, partly to stop his shaking hands being in view.

"Who am I?" He asked, stepping a bit closer to you

You take a deep breath.

"Simon Riley"

At the moment, Ghost's entire body went cold. What felt like an electric shock bolted in his body.

He was lost for words.

"What makes you think that?" He asked

"You have a mole on your neck, and Simon also had a mole" You stated, wanting to be done with the mind games and for him to take his mask off.

"Had?" Simon asked "Must mean he's dead"

"Supposedly dead" You said slyly.

"How'd you know this Simon had a mole?" Ghost asked, fully relishing in the moment of teasing you. He could sense the gears working overtime in your brain.

"I have a photo" You snapped "And I'll show it to you" You said, walking off the mats.

You were tired of the running around the questions. Answers were needed. As you looked behind you, Ghost began to follow your footsteps as you lead the way.

...

Ghost followed you into your room and closed the door behind you.

You pulled out the gold from that had the photo of the five soldiers, staring at it one last time before handing it over to Ghost.

Looking down at the image in the frame, Ghost recognised the Captain, you and a younger version of himself.

There he was. Simon Riley, before the betrayal, before the chaos and when he had a family. When he had a life outside the military.

Ghost looked up at you, your face still had the same stern look, he could tell that you wished it was the same Simon under this mask, the same Simon that was in the framed photo.

Standing in front of Ghost, he was leant back against the wall. The foreboding skull face whose eyes still protruded glared at you. Every now and then those blue eyes blink, replenishing the moisture of his lense covered in black paint ridden skin.

"I thought you were bacon"

"Bacon?" Ghost said in surprise

You tilt your head up, and watch as Ghost - no Simon - cock his head to the side, taking in an inhale as he shifts his weight about.

"Fried to a crisp" You muttered

"That ain't bacon love" He retaliated

You mouth curved when he said love... A cold pleasant feeling rippled through you.

"Is it you?" You ask, voice-breaking slightly, you could feel your eyes beginning ot sting as tears formed.

Ghost sighed, he placed the golden frame upright onto the set of drawers near him. He reached with his slightly trembling fingers, grasping the edge of his mask and took it off.

Your heart skipped a bit, mouth opening wide as the person finally revealed was alive.

"Simon" You murmured, stepping closer to him. It wasn't the same Simon in the photo. His blonde hair was not so blonde, dirtier blond-brown, and was messy and long on the sides. His jaw was covered in stubble, and as you stepped closer your could see scars scattered over his face; one over his nose that ran near his left eye, another across his cheek. His eyes looked tired, but the black paint didn't help.

Taking in every detail, you scan his face. Your mouth curved as you savoured this precious moment. Unable to stop the tears and the tightness in your chest as you got close to him. Simon.

Simon watched as the tears that fell from your eyes finally trickled down your cheek, dropping down to the floor that held them both in this moment of silence. He reached out for your hand and pulled you closer to him.

He took in your sorrow, guilt riddled him like an aching virus. He brought his hands up, his fingers tracing the bronze skin that glowed in the candlelight, trailing his forefinger and thumb against your skin, taking in the softness. Simon sighed and bowed his head slightly, he looked up and saw more tears coming from your eyes, wiping them away with his thumb. The rough palms grasped the nape of your neck, lulling your head back as he weaved his fingers through your brown hair. Simon gazed back, and closed his eyes placing his forehead against yours, his cold sharp nose tip pressing into your round nose.

"Ru" He whispered finally, his eyes still closed, yet he felt your wet lashes flicker against his.

"Simon" You croaked, and sighed deeply into him, Simon felt you relax and pulled in close to him, wrapping his warm strong arms tighter around you. Taking in the comfort as you melted into him.

Each inhale brought in a mix of cinnamon, musk, cigarettes and sweat. A perfect elixir that soothed your melancholy.

"Didn't mean to take so long" Simon gruffed

"I knew something was up" You said, sniffling as you pulled away, wiping the tears away with your wrist. Looking up at Simon, who still held you close to him.

"I just needed time" Simon said, his forehead touched yours has he took another inhale, a weight finally lifted off him.

Reaching around his waist, you wrap your arms tight.

"You took your time, then I took the shot" You said chuckling slightly into him. His grip on you tightened and you could feel him laugh a little too.

As Simon held you in his embrace, thankful that you were not mad, he finally felt his inner demons quell within the darkness that had put a hold on him for far too long.

#modern warfare fanfiction #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x doctor #simon ghost riley x medic #cod fanfic #fan fic ideas #angst #cod mw soap #cod price #cod ghost #ghost mw2 #modern warfare #modern warfare ghost #thoughtsandbones #thoughtsandboneswrites

29 notes · View notes

madrone33 · 11 months ago

Text

Right so... been going crazy trying to catch up on the explosion of stuff peeps have been doing since the EPIC: The Musical Ocean Saga release, but. Got some downtime now, and I just wanted to post my reaction to listening to the songs, 'cause it was wild bro.

Fyi, this is all taking place at around 11:30 pm 24th Dec for me, as I'm an australian, so that would make it... uh, 8:30 am 24th Dec for americans I think? Idk, timezones are weird bro. Basically, I listened to the songs and then wrote down my immediate reactions at like 1 am lol.

*ahem*

OK HOLY SHIT HOLY FUCK. OK OK. They came out for australians. They CAME OUT FOR AUSTRALIA!!!!

I was on dicord, right? And then another australian says they're out, and i'm like wait what but there's still like 16 hours till midnight in est, but i look up 'luck runs out jorgre rivera-herrans' on yt (cause it's a unique name) and scroll down and FUCK IT'S THERE!! THE STANDARD AUTO TOPIC VERSION!! IT'S NOT EVEN MIDNIGHT HERE YET?? (23:24 at the time of discovery. The vid says it was uploaded 3 hrs ago already)

The piano. I heard the first notes of piano and ohhhhh shiiiit it's actually happening!!!

i opened the door and called out to mum 'cause i was still in disbelief and she was still awake and i was like "mum... i think it's out" or SOMETHIG LIKE THAT IDK THE EXACT WORDS. She said jokingly she'd thought i had an existential crisis and GIRL IT KINDA FELT LIKE IT?? I WAS NOT PREPARED! I WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE ANOTHER 16 HOURS!

I tapped on the link thingy to the album in the description and then i had the album RIGHT THERE HOLY MOTHER OF JESUS. IT'S STORM. IN THE FLESH. THERE'S A FUCKING TRUMPET-

I did my civic duty and informed (read: screamed in all caps) to everyone in the discord while mum listened to the first song 'cause she said she was interested and asked and i was so excited and gave her my headphones to listen to storm and then I took em back once I was done and now it's time to go dark. I said goodnight to mum and... pressed play.

Here's the highlights:

Storm: mixing is on another level bro. The vocals, the harmonies, the chorus, and hearing all those snippets without breaks in between, actually flowing and making sense and that ending beat is AHHH-

It went so fast. It's three min long how did it go by so fast what-

Luck Runs Out: the piano is godly. They actually changed the melody of the 'you could be caught off guard' part. My first thought after ooo? Was 'damn it no longer sounds like shut up and dance w/ me' lol.

I think this one changed the most from the snippets. Jsut the way they say lines, and stray words. I love it. The harmonies-

KYFC: the intro is that one atmospheric snippet he did with the flutes!! Aeolus sounds so sassy compared to the old snippets oof hell yes! There's a small instrumental interlude between the first chorus and the crew asking about the bag which is new.

THE PENELOPE PART. OH. MY. GOD. I LEGIT TEARED UP, I WAS CRYING, I'M CRYING JUST THINKING ABOUT IT AND TYPING THIS OUT IT WAS SO FUCKING HEARTBREAKING.

Trying to hold them in his arms? Time to be that father he always wanted to be?? His eyes and heart and soul is heavy??? I'm FUCKING CRYING-

Also wow he really just stayed up for 9 days huh? Respect. Also, fuck those crewmates man. Bet they felt real stupid when it got them killed. Oh, wait, fuck it didn't Poseidon killed everyone but them oh hell nah- And Odysseus still goes to save them from Circe?? Bro. BRO. Just let them die. It ain't worth it.

And that's how Jorge introduces the land of the giants? Cool! I was wondering about that.

Poesiedon pull up! (Is it bad that i thought he sounded like ares in the pj musical there lmao-)

RUTHLESSNESS: it's here. Oh my lord it's here. Everyone stay calm. Fuck it IT'S FUCKING HERE!!

The chanting, Ody's terrified 'Poseidon...', the electric guitar on Poseidon's verse, the fucking growl in his voice is amazing, the 'Die.' is as;ihfd HELL FUCKING YES!!

I love that the 'Captain-!'s of the drowning men is more apparent here, and the silence afterwards... ooof you can hear Ody's horrified stuttered breaths and the way the lyric's changed to '43 left under your command' is soooo fucking good.

And then Ody's sudden defiance and the fucking burning in his eyes as he defies a god and escapes death- Yes. YES! It's so good-

... No wait it's over?? That's it??? WHYYYYY-

(Side note - the fact that there weren't any ads between vids is incredible and I thank the gods for this blessing.)

Ok, but all seriousness, that was incredible. I- I couldn't stop smiling. My face actually started hurting I was smiling so much. I was shaking the whole time, and I had to keep reminding myself to breathe, and- It was amazing. This was an amazing experience, and I'm so glad I could freak out to mum, and she was excited with me, and it was such a good surprise, like an actual chrismas gift from Jorge or some shit. I love it. I love this. Genuinely. It's an amazing thing he's given us and I thank him, sincerely. Thank you, Jorge, and everyone involved in creating this for people to enjoy and love. You should all be proud.

Thanks for reading me freak out, whoever made it to the end lmao. Tagging @dootznbootz because their rambles gave me the confidence to throw my own into the void. Thx :D

#epic the musical #epic the ocean saga #ocean saga release #rambles #rants #odysseus #poseidon #storm #kyfc #luck runs out #ruthlessness #immediate reaction #timezones ftw #25 december #reaction #my posts

18 notes · View notes

morganacorp · 8 months ago

Note

Lol

Grace getting her facial and her phone keeps dinging because Sadie's in the middle if her bi-awakening.

Text #1: where u at?

Text #2 & #3: Grace! ?

Text #4: i thought u were coming 2 spin class!

Text #5: i gave lola3 ur latte

Text #6: r u really not coming? i'll save you Aseat just in case

Text #7: nvmnd. this class is huge. tried to fight off an old lady to keep your bike open. Ur welcome

Text #8: omg grace this place smells like wet socks

Text #9: kimberkyn says ur getting a facial. rude

Text #10 & #11: lola says hi BTW. Hi

Text #12: *picture of Sadie and Lola and Kimberlyn* bout to get sweaty!

Text #13: the instructor said we can't have our phones. so peace out! ✌️��

*missed call*

Text #14: ohmygod grace answer your phone!

Text #15: ok. it's nothing. it's probably nothing. don't worry about it. it's fine. i'll tell you later.

*missed call*

Text #16: ok. so this is probably gonna get long and there will be typosz bc i don't have a lotg of time bcz i had to sneak 2 the bthrm bc i need 2 tell u something but we can't have our phones on the bikes which is so dumb bc I can multitask its not like I'm gonna

Text #17: sorry. lola scared me. o thought it was the instructor. anyway listen there is this girl. no. not just a girl. she is a woman. like a sculpted by the gods woman in this class and she has like. The most insanely perfect ripples i have ever seen and like her eyes are nice too BTW but we were changing un the same room and she just

Text #18: sorry i think the memory made me black out. God. Like. Look. I know it's not okay to objectify someone just because we're in a environment that encourages tight fitting clothing and vigorous rhythmic activity but u don't understand grace. she is gorgeous and omg she laughed when I asked if she knew where the vending machines were and i think my heart kind jumped out of my body because she sounded so sweet. and I want to talk to her again but I also can't fucking breathe because spin class is hard and i already drank all of my water and lola's too and i hate that ur not here. There I said it. I can usually be more put together when ur arounfe but

Text #19: her eyes are green btw

Text #20: not even like gross green. they are like perfect and not even the same color which is somehow even better and they have like stars in them not even lying

Text #21: and she has her hair in a braid and she got kinda sweaty so there's little wisps sticking out around her face and i never like licking sweaty ppl but like if she asked

Text #22: oh shot. i didn't mean that. idk why my mind went to licking her face instead of kissing her like a normal person

Text #23: that would b normal right? i mean iv nver rlly thought abt it b4. not really. but i watched glee. i know it usually hits in high school and obvi it didn't 4 me so this is mayb just bc i only had two donuts this morning instead of 3

Text #24: omg she asked kimberlyn if I have ibs while I was gone. I hate everythibg

Text #25: fyi i took a quiz a minute ago and turns out glee lied

Text #26: i wanted to ask lola if she has like a booklet for ppl questioning their. Preferences but i think mayb it would b easier if u asked for me

Text #27: fuck this is all so weird

Text #28: but also not. it's scary nit weird. like I thought admiring Walker got a little too intense but this is. This is something else

Text #29: ive eaten some beef jerkey and i think it's too soon to think about kissing her. it feels too invasive. so I'm just gonna keep watching her ass in class

Text #30: thnx btw 4 all ur help grace. U r rlly good 2 talk 2

Text #31: ^sarcasm fyi

Text #32: omg her name is lena. isn't that nice? i think that is the most beautiful name in the whole wide world

Text #34: i think she waved at me

Text #35: damn. it was oneof her friends walking outside the door

Text #36: her whole name is lena kieran luthor. and her birthday is October 13.

Text #37: and no she didnt tell me that i looked through her purse while pretending to have ibs and hiding in the bathroom. she uses Christian Dior perfume. i think I have a problem

Text #38: grace can u please call me so I can just leave??

Text #39: i feel like everyone knows. they keep talking about me i can feel it

Text #40: omg she helped the little old lady in front of me asjust her settings on the bike. She's so nice. i bet she saves puppies and orphans in her spare time. angel in disguise right there

Text #41: how long is this fucking spin class?!

Text #42: lola was talking about a gay show called the bold type. will u watch it with me so I can see how a normal heterosexual would react?

Text #43: lena offered me a drink from her water bottle and i didn't even worry about germs. I just went for it

Text #44: how long is ur fucking facial?! Y haven't u texted me back?!

Text #45: only 5 more minutes. I can do this

Text #46: I think lens was flirting with lola and I wish I had laser vision so I could set everything on Fire this is awful

Text #47: my heart is broken

Text #48: nvmnd. she touched my arm and said she likes my shirt.

Text #49: I'm wearing one of kimberlyns work out shirts BTW but that's not the point. She likes it on me. So kimberkyn is never getting this back

Text #50: omg! Grace! Grace!

Text #51: she recommended we get kombucha after class. Idk what that is but I would eat anything for her

Text #52: Lola says kombucha tastes like ass and kimberkyn says we have to get back ;(

Text #53: SEE THIS IS WHY I NEED YOU HERE YOU COULD VOTE TO GO GET KOMBUCHA WITH ME

Text #54: NOOOO ILL NEVER SEE HER AGAIN. GOODBYE BEAUTIFUL GODDESS GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD

Reply: lol

Text #55: ur laughing. i bear my broken soul to u and ur laughing

Text #56: Not Cool Grace

ANON THIS IS HILARIOUS 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Thank you so much for this, it has made my night! There's so many gems hidden in here... I'm in tears! 😂😂😂

#lena luthor #the girls on the bus #sadie mccarthy

9 notes · View notes

poupeesdecirque · 7 months ago

Text

General Update

Just a heads up, I mainly write for those who got snippets the last days and are maybe (quite) concerned and worried about me.

So, the last few weeks at work have been literal hell.

More under the cut, this gets long.

This week especially, we worked with 6 people understaffed (out of 16, might be not that bad if you work in an office but if you work with humans, especially children/toddlers even it's... difficult), I won't get much into detail but weeks we have the bi-weekly meeting mondays before work mess me up already but then 3 more people calling in sick made everything worse. It didn't help that my annual employee-feedback talk was coming up on wednesday and that turns me into a pile of anxiety of its own.

The tuesday in before had me crying in the bathroom at work after just 1,5 hours of a 8+ hour day without real lunch break (just fyi last summer I went down with hours to be less stressed... I got in more than two days worth of work in overtime the last month). I work there for 10 years and this is the 2nd time I cried and this time it was just because of the pure stress. I won't go into detail here but I went beyond my limit so often the last weeks I am merely a shell and just do creative things to cope somehow.

The annual talk went .... good. No, good is an understatement, it was one of the best I had, there is basically zero critique on how I work, boss is very satisfied and the only thing is that I am told to tell my coworkers when their decisions stress me. haha. yeah.

Then there is our street... it's a construction site since February but now the whole thing is closed down, last week I almost didn't manage to get to work bc they closed down another road and I had no way to get through left q_q...

The work week was just 3 days (luckily) and we went into a long weekend bc of the public holiday. I decided to take the thursday slow but, yeah I know it better, the point here is when you go from 200% to maybe 10% your mind will crash and that's what I got.

I am so under stress my body has no idea where to put it and tries everything, I can't sleep well, just for a few hours and then I am wide awake.

Aside that I am basically done with the redraw project which took me almost a year, then my fic 'Warmth' is done too, it's just one final scene and that's the epilogue with the final conclusion, I have been working on this for 2,5 years now and it's part of my evening routine.. the redraws are part of my morning routine... I changed a few more things and well I managed to mess up my entire routine but I NEED IT TO FUNCTION.

I felt it coming but well.. you guessed it right, depression hit me hard on friday evening (I have seasonal depression, it gets worse the longer the days become, higher temperatures are often enough to trigger it, then the lack of sleep, two big projects ending, etc) and yesterday before the con I didn't even want to go there despite the Con being the only thing keeping me going the whole week.

I'm exhausted, tired but sleeping doesn't work as my body is "I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO PUT THE STRESS". I am really mean towards myself and I am trying hard not to be an ass and we don't talk about the fact that I need days to like... put away the laundry, put groceries into the cabinets or have crafting materials scattered around everywhere. It's just a real mess in here.

Overall I just... pour energy into crafts bc I have no idea where to put it. I would love to just go for a good old inline skate round but I don't want to carry my skates through the landscape for 10 minuted bc we have no streets q_q;

I know I stacked on a lot and less would be better (heck I challenged myself to cook more variety again and ofc I got competitive with myself but went out of my comfort zone and then wasn't able to estimate things anymore... if you know me closer you know what that means), but right now it's about finding the balance here as when i do nothing it just ... gets worse.

Concluding this means I am on a tightrope with things and there is not much needed to make me fall (again). I have projects to work on, but I get too invested and then overdo it which means ~ more stress~ ... good thing I can't work on Lenalee unless the new zippers arrive and sewing in general is not really appealing to me.

But I prepped everything for sewing for her and Maple, I have cut parts for the Allen Clown Cosplay, even started the buttons (& remade those already bc first attempt left me unsatisfied), I made the cover for the next fic update but I don't want to post everything at once.

Don't forget the situation at work made me an expert in how to get a lot of shit done in very little time and to use every minute I have to get the most results out of the time I have. Slowing down is a real issue I have to learn.

This entry doesn't make much sense but if you have read until here just know I thank you for your attention. This month is mainly DGM themed everything as the series turns 20. I have photos with OC dolls queued up and once I have the mind for more sewing I will work on Maple.

There is cosplay progress from a while ago, cosplay photos, drawings, lots of doll progress from Kanda to come and in general some very pretty photos I am found of.

Oh and the travel blog regarding the HanaCon is written I will post it soon, maybe not today bc it's enough already.

#blog #personal update

5 notes · View notes

theinternetisfulloftrash · 2 years ago

Text

Far Away From L.A.

Story Summary: Dylan arrives ahead of production to a new filming location to get a break from L.A. It’s a small town in eastern Canada that’s remote and serene. While he’s enjoying the touch of anonymity that comes with filming in a rural town where most people couldn’t care less who he was, he meets Amelia.

Pairing: Dylan x OFC

Warnings: eventual smut, RPF, slight angst, general naughtiness

Authors Note: A two-part epilogue? I'm a disaster human. It's official.

Index: Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7 / Chapter 8 / Chapter 9 / Chapter 10 / Chapter 11 / Chapter 12 / Chapter 13 / Chapter 14 / Chapter 15 / Chapter 16 / Chapter 17 / Chapter 18 / Chapter 19 / Chapter 20 / Epilogue I / Epilogue II (Coming Eventually)

Epilogue - Part I (Dylan POV)

The air was crisp and cool in New York, the summer heat long-past, once green leaves glimmering burnt oranges and golds in the afternoon sun. The streets were bustling with people tucked into their fall jackets with their hands warming on their coffee cups. Dylan had just stepped out of the cafe and began moving through the crowded sidewalk, headphones on over his hat with Tony trotting along at his heel. He quietly stepped around people until he was able to turn down a quieter side street. He drew in a full lung of fresh air and smiled to himself as the two of them continued on their walk. Dylan sipped at his coffee, looking down at Tony.

“Such a good boy,” he said, smiling when Tony looked up at him. He tucked his hand into the pocket of his hoodie and pulled out the small biscuit the barista had given him when he paid for his drink. He stopped while Tony kept walking until his leash tugged at his collar and he turned back to Dylan.

“Can ya sit, Bud?” Dylan cooed, grinning when Tony did as he asked. “Good boy!” he chuckled, giving him the treat and rubbing his head.

As the two of them continued down the street, Dylan let himself sink into a relaxing pace. No need to rush. Tony was usually in a hurry, but he’d slow down if Dylan did. Cars passed by, but Dylan heard only the music playing in his noise-canceling headphones. He was listening to Remi Wolf, as he basically had been doing on repeat for most of the last year. To call him a touch obsessed would not be an understatement. He’d dug into passions in this last year, taking a break from the fevered pitch of the previous. Family and friends, reconnecting and unplugging. It was the humanity recharge he’d been hungry for and he finally felt sated.

Work never really stopped entirely, there was promoting, interviews, premieres, occasional auditions, and discussions, but taking some time away from active sets had been incredibly good for his mental health. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d woken up with a tension headache, or spent twenty-two of twenty-four hours awake. His life had a tendency to become both tediously formulaic and exhaustingly demanding at the same time, and when he got into those habits—into the mindset that he had to be working and that without a script in his hand, he was worthless—he knew it was time to take a step back. Take some time to just live.

Continue Reading on AO3!

I had no intention of making the epilogue two parts, but like... the shit got away from me in a HUGE way. Enjoy? I guess? I'll be working on the second part when I can, but this bit has been in the works since Christmas... just as a fully transparent FYI. Much love, CUTIESSS! <3

#dylan o'brien #dylan o'brien fanfiction #dylan o'brien imagine #dylan o'brien smut #dylan o'brien concept #FAFLA fic #FAFLA epilogue part I #trashy writing #much love to anyone here who still gives a shit about this #LOVE YA #p.s. I've been planning the twitter pfp thing since I started the dang fic and then he went and actually fucking did it and I shit

40 notes · View notes

tepilangitsenja · 2 years ago

Text

Thought on: Marriage

“Sebuah upaya mengurai segala hal yang mampir ke pikiranku tentang pernikahan. Tentu saja, bukan karena akan segera menikah dalam waktu dekat :) “-Rania Nawra-

Disclaimer: Apa yang aku tulis disini adalah apa yang aku pikirkan di saat ini, yang tentunya, masih sangat bisa berubah di masa yang akan datang. Hopefully, kalau pun ada yang berubah, kearah perspektif yang lebih wise yaa. Plus, it’s going to be long story. Anyway, selamat membaca!

----------------------------------------------

Dalam beberapa waktu terakhir, aku banyak memikirkan dan mengobrolkan topik pernikahan, dengan teman maupun keluargaku. Sebagai manusia yang sudah ‘melewati milestone kuliah dan memasuki milestone bekerja, tentunya diskusi tentang hal ini tidak bisa dihindari. Dan gabisa disebut “ngebet nikah ya lu” juga kalo sering ngobrolin ini, karena obrolan ini bukan lagi obrolan anak belasan tahun yang pandangannya tentang pernikahan masih sepolos itu.

I am 22 going on 23 this year, dan ketahuilah guys, waktu aku ada di usia ‘Sixteen going on Seventeen’ yang kaya judul lagu itu, 23 adalah usia dimana aku ingin menikah. Haha. Such a young age to get married, tapi waktu itu, aku yang berusia 16 tahunan punya alasan loh kenapa aku mau nikah di usia segitu. Dulu, kurang lebih aku mikir gini:

“Oke. Aku lulus SMA umur 17 tahun, lulus kuliah 21 tahun, terus kerja/S2, abis itu nikah di usia 23 tahun. Sabi lah nabung 2 tahun buat nikah”

This is a bit OOT, tapi sebagai anak kelahiran akhir tahun 2000, aku akui aku punya sedikit privilege usia yang lebih muda dibandingkan teman-temanku. Privilege yang muncul karena aku gamau ngulang TK B (TK 3 tahun) supaya umurku cukup buat masuk sekolah negeri dan akhirnya masuk SD swasta, ditambah karena aku ada di program akselerasi saat SMP. Jadi waktu itu, aku baru dapet KTP di semester 1 kuliah. Ga semuda itu, tapi cukup muda. Dan menurutku di level ‘maturity’ saat itu, aku ‘bisa nih’ nikah di umur 23 Tahun.

Tapi tentunya realita tidak sesuai ekspektasi. Aku memang lulus S1 di usia 21 tahun, tapi baru dapet decent job yang sesuai dengan career aspiration ku menjelang usia 22 tahun-tentunya, dan baru bisa nabung. Moreover, ternyata ada banyak hal yang terjadi di hidupku setelah usia 18 tahun, pilihan-pilihan yang aku pilih, dan tentunya, proses belajar dan maturing alias mendewasa yang bikin aku sadar kalau “Marriage is not that easy”. At least, for me. Well, everyone have their own perspective, right?.

Jadi, aku disclaimer lagi kalo tulisan ini bukanlah bentuk kampanye ‘anti nikah muda sebelum lulus kuliah’ dan lain sebagainya. This writing applies to MY LIFE. You do you, kalian punya cara sendiri buat menjalani kehidupan kalian, dengan prinsip dan nilai-nilai yang kalian pegang. So, no offense ya guys (Plus, menurutku perempuan-perempuan yang menjalani peran sebagai mahasiswa S1 dan juga S3 (re: Istri), kalian keren!).

Kembali ke bahasan tentang pernikahan.

Ngomongin pernikahan, menurutku ada banyak aspek yang menyusunnya. Tapi kalo aku boleh mengerucutkan hal-hal penting yang kudu dipelajarin dulu sebelum menikah, maka itu mencakup: ilmu agama, relationship-communication, parenting, dan juga finansial.

Kalo aku coba inget-inget, kayanya aku pertama kali belajar tentang pernikahan dan sebagian aspek di dalamnya tuh pas SMA di Pondok (Well, now I can proudly said that aku ‘SMA di Pondok’ instead of di ‘boarding school’ #characterdevelopment #kapankapankitabahas), lewat bab munakahat di Minhajul Muslim dan kajian nisaiyah rutin untuk santri putri. FYI, di kajian nisaiyah ini ada semacam modul yang disesuaikan untuk setiap jenjang dari kelas 7-12 SMA (atau kelas 1-6 Aliyah). Sejak kelas 10/11 (rada lupa), kami mulai ‘diberi tugas’ buat mengisi materi nisa’iyah untuk adik-adik kelas 7 atau 8, yang materinya dimulai dari bab thararah dan menjaga kebersihan diri dan sekitar. Meanwhile, kajian nisa’iyah untuk santri senior akan diisi oleh para asatidzah dengan topik yang lebih ‘berat’. Dan tentunya, yang dipelajari bukan bagian uwu-uwunya saja.

Di pelajaran fiqih dulu, materi-materi yang membekas di aku tentang bab munakahat justru materi tentang Talak. Iya, talak. Tentang bagaimana talak itu jatuh, apa yang terjadi setelahnya, proses ruju’, dan tentang kasus-kasus yang terjadi. Terus aku inget banget setelah dapet materi itu, aku mulai berpikir kalau “Wah, nikah tu emang ga boleh main-main” dan “Omongan kita harus dijaga agar bener-bener ngomong yang baik-baik saja”.

Di nisa’iyah, salah satu materi yang membekas buatku justru materi mengurus bayi (cara memandikan, menggendong dll). Kata para asatidzah, beliau-beliau tuh ingin mempersiapkan dan making sure kalau santriwati kelas XII ketika lulus, sudah tau (at least basic things) untuk menjadi seorang istri dan ibu. Soalnya, kita gatau jodohnya datengnya kapan. Jadi, tetap harus dipersiapkan.

Tapi belajar tentang itu di pondok tentunya ga serta merta bikin aku siap nikah setelah lulus SMA. Aku masih ngerasa ilmunya kurang dan butuh belajar, plus yaaa ga siap aja. Aku tahu aku butuh belajar, tapi di awal kuliah aku justru gamau sama sekali ikut kajian pranikah. Why? Karena suatu kali di semester 1 aku ga sengaja denger salah satu kajian pranikah (karena solat di masjid tersebut), yang isinya justru kaya semacam mendorong-dorong orang buat nikah muda (waktu itu aku nangkepnya gitu sih, but it can only be my assumption hehe).

Barulah di 2020 aku pertama kali memberanikan diri join kelas yang berhubungan dengan pernikahan, lewat salah satu kelas dari asrama RK, Kelas Cerita Menikah Batch 1. Setelah ikut kelas itu, aku beberapa kali ikut kelas sejenis, seperti FWMP Batch 1 (2021), Kelas Proposal Ta’aruf nya Teh Juan (2021), terus ikut Dialog Menuju Rumah Tangga ‘Diorama’ Career Class (2022).

Lalu, apakah setelah mengikuti kelas-kelas itu, aku jadi ngerasa lebih siap nikah? Jujurly, NGGAK. Aku justru malah jadi reconsider keinginanku untuk menikah di usia 23 tahun, dan berkesimpulan bahwa kayanya “This plan is not SMART enough”. Setelah ikut kelas-kelas itu, aku jadi kaya bikin semacam gap analysis dari ‘Aku saat ini’ dengan sosok ‘Istri dan Ibu Ideal’ yang aku bikin (Jadi, ini versiku ya), dan menyadari kalau gap ini ga akan cukup untuk dikejer dalam waktu 1 tahun (Aspek Time Bound di SMART hoho). Ada banyak PR yang harus kuselesaikan pada diriku sendiri :).

Wait, ini bukan PR-PR yang berhubungan dengan “Bisa masak apa nggak” ato “bisa ngurus anak apa nggak” dll, karena SATU, Hal-hal itu masih sangat bisa pelajari karena menurutku itu termasuk TECHNICAL SKILLS+ada insting seorang ibu pada setiap Wanita (katanya kan begitu). KEDUA, aku cukup pede untuk mengatakan bahwa aku bisa masak, sudah belajar mengurus anak (Well, at least a 9 years gap with my little brother helped me a lot on understanding how to do that, thanks to mengurus Azka sejak bocil wkwk), dan membantu mengurus rumah tangga, apalagi setelah ayah nggak ada.

PR-PR ini lebih berhubungan dengan Behavioural Skills, yang a bit more philosophical. pertanyaan-pertanyaan seperti:

“Kamu udah cukup content nggak ya sama hidupmu sekarang? Sebelum nantinya kamu melahirkan kehidupan lain yang mungkin akan sangat mengubah kehidupanmu?”

“Kamu oke ga ya, kalau kamu punya anak yang akan meniru banyak hal dari kamu, termasuk habit yang kamu punya sekarang?. Apakah kamu sudah bisa menjadi sosok yang akan diteladani oleh anakmu, dengan habit mu sekarang?”

“Apakah kamu sudah cukup stabil dalam menjaga dan melindungi diri kamu sendiri, sebelum kamu mempunyai sosok-sosok yang harus kamu lindungi?”

Dan berbagai pertanyaan lainnya yang membuat aku banyak merefleksi kembali kesiapanku untuk memasuki jenjang pernikahan. Karena jujurly, beberapa jawaban untuk pertanyaan itu, jawabannya untuk saat ini adalah : TIDAK/BELUM. Hehe :(.

Anak adalah peniru yang hebat. Sangat hebat. Dan tentunya, sosok yang akan banyak ditiru seorang anak (entah secara sadar atau tidak) adalah orang tuanya, yang seharusnya banyak menghabiskan waktu bersamanya. Contohnya, aku:

Bundaku sangat suka warna ungu dan spektrumnya. Sementara aku pas kecil lebih suka warna pink (wkwk just like a lot of bocil perempuan). Tapi lama-kelamaan, aku yang tau bahwa warna kesukaan Bunda adalah ungu, sadar ga sadar jadi suka warna ungu. Sampe sekarang.

Aku pas kecil nggak suka sayur. Tapi karena aku terus menerus ngelihat bundaku makan sayur dan katanya “enak”, aku juga pelan-pelan mau makan sayur, dan jadi suka sayur, bahkan sayur-sayur sejenis pare, jengkol dan pete WKWK.

Ya, pokonya intinya anak itu akan banyak meniru orangtuanya. Itu juga yang dimention sama Ibu nya Maudy Ayunda dalam satu satu konten mereka.

Dan jujurly sekarang, aku masih ngerasa ga rela kalo anak ku punya daily habit kaya aku yang masih banyak kurangnya ini. Misal: Aku pengen anakku kelak menyukai olahraga, tapi berapa sih persentase nya anakku akan suka olahraga kalo sehari-hari ngeliat orangtuanya mager dan sukanya rebahan?. Makanya, aku HARUS bisa memperbaiki habitku dulu. Entah itu habit yang berhubungan dengan kesehatan, ibadah yaumiyah, habit belajar, meregulasi emosi, finansial dan lain sebagainya.

Tentunya, aku gabisa 100% memastikan bahwa anakku kalo udah gede akan ‘jadi seperti yang aku mau’ karena pada akhirnya, it depends on them. But at least, aku gamau mereka mengalami kesulitan-kesulitan dalam proses bertumbuhnya karena pola asuh yang mereka peroleh dari aku sebagai orang tuanya. Makanya, yang aku lakukan sekarang sebelum memutuskan menikah adalah : memperbaiki diriku. Seenggaknya itu variabel yang bisa kuutak-atik untuk saat ini. Variabel-variabel lainnya belum ketemu soalnya. Hehe.

Aku ingin bisa menjadi seorang Ibu yang bener-bener bisa jadi madrasatul uula untuk anak-anakku, tentunya dengan ayahnya sebagai kepala sekolahnya.

Nah, cuma ternyata proses launching sekolahnya untuk penerimaan murid baru nggak bisa secepet itu. Kurikulum nya masih perlu disusun, tenaga-tenaga pengajar dan sistem sekolahnya juga. Nyari kepala sekolah yang bener-bener bisa diandalkan untuk menjadi pemimpin sekolah yang baik juga ga mudah.

“Terus sekolahnya bisa mulai nerima murid baru kapan ya kak?. Yang jelas dong!”

“Oke tenang pemirsa. Kami jujur belum bisa memastikan secara fix kapan mulai bisa menerima murid, karena ada campur tangan yang diatas. Kami akan berusaha agar sekolahnya siap taun depan di 2024. Tapi gabisa janji, soalnya murid baru bisa diterima kalau kepala sekolahnya juga sudah ada. Mohon doanya saja ya Ayah Bunda”.

(PS: Sumpa aku gainget nulis part ini pas ngetik wkwk, lagi ngantuk banget cuy entah kenapa nulis dialog ala-ala begini. Tapi gapapa deh bagus juga soalnya wkwk)

Intinya, untuk saat ini aku sepertinya masih harus banyak menyelesaikan corrective actions untuk mengejar gap yang ada.

“Kalo gitu terus mah kapan siapnya?”

Iya memang, aku banyak bertanya ke temen-temenku yang udah nikah yang bilang, sebenernya pun ketika mereka memutuskan buat menikah, mereka ga bener-bener siap 100%. Perasaan belum siap itu selalu saja ada. Bahkan Pak Sandiaga Uno aja bilang kalo beliau tuh dulu ga siap nikah (wkwk cerita Nia pas sesi meet sama warga grup manusia kuat weekend kemaren).

Makanya, untuk berusaha ga menjadikan alasan “ga siap” yang berujung “gasiap muluuuu”, aku berusaha memberikan due date untuk setiap corrective action yang aku bikin. Supaya goalnya juga SMART ya wak, wkwk.

“Wah kapan tu due date nya”

Hooo tentu saja rhs alias rahasia. Bukan karena apa-apa, Cuma takutnya entar kalo action nya udah overdue aku dikejer-kejer lagi sama auditor T.T hehe becanda. Ya pokonya aku berusaha menyelesaikan actions yang ada sebelum due date lah. Due date di usia yang tadinya aku jadikan usia ‘target menikah’ ku, tapi setelah dipikir-pikir jadi due date corrective actions aja. Soalnya gatau realisasi ‘menikah’ nya kapan. Lagian juga doi nya belum ada, dan bersyukur juga sii belum ada disaat sekarang. Mungkin Allah mau aku lebih fokus mengejar gap yang ada karena tahu ciptaannya yang satu ini gampang oleng kalo jatuh cinta :).

Sebagai penutup, aku mau sedikit ngasi tulisan buat future partner (wkwkwk uhuk uhuk).

“Ya pokonya siapa pun kamu nanti, entah sekarang tuh kita udah pernah ketemu atau belum sebelumnya, semoga sebagaimana aku yang sedang berusaha mempersiapkan dan memantaskan diri (hah ko aku geli sendiri nulis begini, tapi tetep dilanjutin), kamu juga sedang melakukan hal yang sama. Semangat calon kepala sekolahku. Mari kita menikah dalam pernikahan yang berilmu :)

Dan buat future children:

“Dear my future children, now I’m trying hard to love and prepare myself, so when you come to me in the future, I will embrace and love you with a full heart”

Benar-benar tulisan random semoga ga banyak yang baca T.T

Sumbawa, 9 Februari 2023

24 notes · View notes

sunnydaleherald · 9 months ago

Text

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Wednesday, February 28

WESLEY: Mr. Giles. I'd like your opinion. While the last thing I want to do is muddle bad behavior in front of impressionable youth, I wonder if asking Miss Chase to dance would... GILES: For God's sake, man, she's eighteen. And you have the emotional maturity of a blueberry scone. Just have at it, would you, and stop fluttering about. WESLEY: Right, then. Thanks for that.

~~BtVS 3x20 “The Prom”~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Final Ingredient (Willow, Buffy, PG) by badly_knitted

Rusty (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by veronyxk84

Blackout (Interlude) (Darla/Drusilla, M) by SomeKindOfADeviant

Tangled in HelLA (Buffy/Spike, M) by all_choseny

Valentine's Date (Buffy/Spike, G) by all_choseny

Take Me Home Tonight (Buffy/Spike, E) by all_choseny

[Chaptered Fiction]

Amber the Vampire Slayer, Chapter 1/? (Ensemble, OC, T) by Redtheseer

Standing Back Behind, Chapter 1/? (Ensemble, OC, T) by silvain

Dawn Rising, Chapter 45/? (Buffy, LOTR xover, T) by Luna_delCielo

Same Coin, Chapter 3/? (Buffy/OC, G) by The_Eclectic_Bookworm

[Ukrainian language] Forward to Time Past//Вперед у час минулий, Chapter 30/67 (Buffy/Spike, E) translation by Uraniya

Everything is different now, Chapter 20 (Buffy/Faith, M) by alwynjaegar

Blue, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, M) by Halo0223

The Steps Saga, Chapter 4 (Buffy/Angel, M) by a2zmom

Xander: A New Knight, Chapter 1 (Ensemble, M) by KingGold77

Early One Morning, Chapter 19 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by all choseny

Love Lives Here, Chapter 28 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Passion4Spike

Agency Has It's Price, Chapter 19 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Desicat

[French language] Du fond du cœur, Chapter 4 COMPLETE! (Buffy/Spike, PG) by Miss Kitty

Dawn Rising, Chapter 45 (Buffy, LOTR xover, FR15) by Luna

A Breath is But a Soundless Whisper, Chapters 25-26 (Buffy/Spike, 18+) by Blackoberst

Coming Through, Chapter 44 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by hulettwyo

Oblivious, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by hulettwyo

Ready for it?, Chapter 6 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Lilacsandorangeblossoms

Early One Morning, Chapters 18-19 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by all choseny

I Do!, Chapter 24 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Dusty

Stomping on butterflies, Chapters 15-16 COMPLETE! (Buffy/Spike, T) by Blackoberst

Risque Roommates, Chapters 6-7 (Buffy/Faith/Spike, E) by shithappens

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork: I wish I was better at coloring. (Lindsey McDonald, worksafe) by pinkpersonsblog

Artwork: You Shouldn’t be anything like me, You’ll never be anything like me (Faith, Xander, worksafe) by yarboyandy

Artwork: “ Hello Luv… ” (Spike, worksafe) by bertolts

Artwork: Art - Valentine's Feast Day (Angel, Darla, Drusilla, Spike, M) by genericaces

Artwork: Fanart (Buffy outline, worksafe) by lars_mayzx

[Reviews & Recaps]

Wrapping up the series for the first time: some thoughts! by LateRegistrationz

PODCAST: HELLMOUTH HOMOS: The Freshman (SEASON 4 PREMIERE!) by Fear Queers

PODCAST: Fang Measuring Contest - Angel S05E20 - The Girl in Question by Pop Culture Role Call

[Recs & In Search Of]

ISO: A faith x buffy fanfiction that was over one million words long that used to be on fanfiction.net requested by howsummerfeels

ISO: Does anyone remember the Traveling Spike blog?? requested by TouringTheFacility

ISO: does anyone know the artists of these fan-made posters? requested by Due-Drag5700

[Community Announcements]

FYI, we have opted out of “third-party sharing” for both sunnydaleherald and sunnydale-digest by sunnydaleherald

[Fandom Discussions]

we get the two great loves of giles’s life in one episode and they never once interact but they both share this moment by jennycalendar

the thing that makes me crazy about gethan + calendiles is that both ethan and jenny are so hungry for even a corner of giles’s heart by jennycalendar

do we know by season 8 (or later, if it comes up) if Faith is still a fugitive? Or did the writers forget that? by bisexualblckcanary

HELLO THE FRATERNITY BOY THAT BUFFY’S MOST DRAWN TO BEING “THE ONE TO WATCH OUT FOR.” by jennycalendar

Willow and Buffy never dating is my Roman Empire cause they are so underrated by hermyohkneegranger

[Parallels between Buffy and Faith's life experiences] by coraniaid

lilah and lindsey are so funny to me by justafriendofxanders

Is dawn a real person/human? by StarSilver0117

I am still confused on why Wesley trusted Holtz to keep his word regarding their deal regarding Connor? by b3_k1nd_rw1nd

I am a bit confused on the series finale tbh and how the First was defeated? by b3_k1nd_rw1nd

Anyone else notice an 'oopsie' that you missed the first time around? by Eldon42

Does anyone think Amy could have been a better girlfriend for Xander in the earlier seasons than Cordy? by AceItaliano

Is it canonical that slayers need less sleep than average people? by sadhungryandvirgin

Was Xander always this difficult to watch? by bobsthrowawayacct

What would you say Cordelia is afraid of by the end of Season 2? by Beached-Peach

US college culture question by Reviewingremy

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

Join the editor team :)

#btvs #buffy the vampire slayer #angel the series #ats #fan art #fan fiction #meta

3 notes · View notes

thoughtsandbones · 1 year ago

Text

The dots that begin to align

WARNINGS: Mention of profanity, scars, fluff, anxiety, medical inaccuracies, surgery, blood, gore and just getting the POV of our friendly neighbourhood masked menace.

Word count: 3309K

Song inspo: Don't Fear the Reaper - Tom Jones, Halo - Haley James Scott ( BethanyJoy Lenz), Sinner - The Last Dinner Party

spelling and some grammar mistakes as I am bad at times... :/

(FYI: bold sentences... that are like this... are supposed to describe redacted data/info to the plot... ;] .. )

Please do let me know how you all are finding this fanfic! :D

MASTERLIST

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 15 I and PART 15 II

Part 16

The midday sun radiated through the windows into the infirmary. Ghost noticed the light bounce off your brown skin and across parts of your face. Anytime you looked up and out the window, the sun rays changed the colour of your eyes to the shade of honey brown that made Ghost's heart flutter.

He savoured the silent moment with you as you finished the last suture. Gazing upon your face full of concentration, as if nothing else was on your mind, just the wound in front of you. He watched as you straightened up and marveled at your handiwork, the neat stitches all in equal space and length.

"Going to just cover it with a bandage" You say as you reach over to the trays next to the med bed and pull out a medium sized dressing.

"Thanks Doc" Ghost said clearing his throat, he got up and leant slightly on his elbows.

"How does it feel?" You ask him "You can sit up if you are able to" You add looking briefly at his naked toned and muscular upper body, the edge of his long mask covering the edge of his shoulders, that mole on his jugular not visible.

Ghost sits up slowly, and swings his leg over the edge of the bed. Looking down at his stitches, he admired the neatness and precision. You moved closer to Ghost, and then began to apply the dressing over the stitches.

"Next time let us know if you were injured too" You say not looking at him

Ghost looked down at you, not breaking your concentration from the dressing.

"Johnny was more important" He gruffed

You roll your eyes and look up at him, meeting his gaze.

"So are you sir" You respond finishing applying the dress over his lower abdomen, trying to not ogle at the various scars over his body.

He scoffed at your response. Him? Important? Nah, just another gear in the machine of war he thought to himself.

You shook your head in disapproval, not wanting to start an argument with your lieutenant, you just ignore him. Taking your gloves off and throwing them in the hazard bin.

"All sorted" You say and weakly smile at Ghost, his blue eyes still focused on you. "Need a shirt?" You ask

Ghost took in that sad smile. "Thanks Doc, be alright, room is only down the hall" He said getting up from the med bed and watched as you cleaned the bed.

You nod at him and finished clearing up.

"Don't get the bandage wet, no heavy lifting or you'll rip my handiwork" You sigh, eyelids becoming heavy with every blink.

"You need some sleep" Ghost said leaning back against the door watching as you discarded tissues and equipment in their appropriate bins.

"Hmm" You say gazing out the window, eyes becoming heavier, leaning against the window sill. The crash was oncoming. Long surgeries where the brain had to be kept active, focused on the task at hand took up a lot of energy. Saving Soap. Poring deep into his flesh and bones. Rewiring his nerves.

"Doc?" Ghost said, watching you look out into the sun now high up in the blue sky over base.

"Hmm" You mumble again "Going to sleep now" You say plainly. But still you did not move.

Ghost came forward a bit and kept his eyes on you. Noticing the reflection of Ghost coming towards you, you turn to meet his gaze.

"Going now" You say, moving away from the window and past Ghost, briefly glancing at his naked torso again.

You open the door and head out first, Ghost followed behind you and stepped to the side as you turned to face the door and drew out your keys, locking it. Your eyes wander up to Ghost, who was still looking at you.

"You're doing that staring thing again." You say without thinking, but then your eyes widen when you realise what you said out loud.

Ghost chuckled and looked away.

"Sorry, that just came out wrong." You quickly say, looking at him then moving your eyes to the floor.

"S'alrigh'" Ghost said, crossing his bare muscular arms "I do stare a lot.." He mumbled looking back at you. You smile weakly again at him before bringing your right hand to cover mouth as you yawned.

"I need to sleep" You say moving your hand from your mouth to rub you brow bone.

"Go sleep now. That's an order Hari" Ghost said laughing, moving his hands to your shoulders, his bare hands could feel the skin and bones under the fabric of your scrubs as he guided you towards your room. You move along with him yawning one more time as your unlocked the door, turning one last time.

"Good night Lieutenant" You say wearily.

"Good night" Ghost said nodding as you gave a meek smile.

Ghost moved away from your door as he heard the lock clicking, and made his way back to his room. After getting in, he walked to his bathroom, taking his mask off, revealing Simon in the mirror. Black paint mixed with sweat had smeared across his cheeks and down the sides of his nose. He took a few steps back looking his upper body, various scars scattered across the skin, lifting his arm and smelling himself, the smell of old sweat coming off him was strong. He felt a tinge of embarrassment, cheeks and ears going red at the thought of you being repulsed by his bad odour.

"Fucks sake" He said and then turned to the shower and stripped off his dirty trousers and boots. Getting into the shower and letting the hot water run over him. As he grabbed his loofah he noticed the white bandage in the corner of his eye.

"Don't get the bandage wet" he remembered you saying. Simon turned the water off and grabbed a towel patting the now wet bandage dry.

"Fucks sake!" He said through gritted teeth, patting the bandage slightly harder, underneath the wound ached. In the moment of building anger, he wanted to rip off the bandage and attack the wound, an attempt to punish himself for being so stupid.

But your tired eyes flickered in his mind. If he destroyed your hard work, you'll be even more pissed at him and then revealing himself would be a lot harder.

Simon leant back against the white tiles of the shower, the droplets of water soaked onto his skin as he slid down, wincing as he brought his knees up.

"How could I be so stupid" He muttered to himself. With the towel he covered his lower abdomen, hoping it would absorb the moisture from the wet bandage. A heaviness wafted over him, eyelids drooping, he closed them.

"Just for a moment" He said "Rest here just a moment" He said again to himself, breathing sharply through his nose and exhaling. He drifted off, the white light of the bathroom still on glaring sharply at him even when his eyes were closed.

...

The unexpected beeping of your pager woke you up from your short sleep. Your eyes open slowly, and with your hand reaching for the pager, reading 999 - ICU, you threw the covers off the bed and leapt out. Cold shock giving you a sudden bolt of energy.

Soap! You think.

Grabbing a set on new scrubs from your drawer, you quickly put them on. The pager beeped again: 999 - ICU

A heavy sick feeling planted itself in your stomach as your tied the laces of your trainers. You think of all the possible things that could've gone wrong. But everything was fine! you pleaded with yourself. Grabbing your scrub cap, and unlocking the door you run out, not bothering to lock it.

Every second counted

Running down the stairs, you nearly toppled over Captain Price who was walking up.

"Hari! You alright?" He said, eyed widening

You looked up at him with worry in your eyes

"It's Soap" You cried, showing him your pager that went off again: 999 - ICU

"Go." Price commanded nodding at you, and you did. Quickening up the pace as you jumped down the final set of stairs, and running down the hall to entrance of Building 2.

As you ran across the tarmac of base, adrenaline coursed through your veins, you went through the mental checklist of what you did and what could've gone wrong.

Perhaps there was another nerve that was damaged... You think as your ran towards the entrance of the RAMC building.

Your legs felt like giving up, but you could not. Soap mattered now more than ever, and it was your job to save him. To look after him. All of them.

Reaching the reception area before the ICU, you see Clarissa writing on the whiteboard.

"Clarissa!" You wheezed as you buckled over, trying to catch your breath "What happened?" You added, gasping for air. Clarissa turned towards you, her braids swinging along with, her face confused..

"Ah did you find out about Gaz?" She asked moving over to you.

"Huh?" You said looking at her confused "I got paged" You gasped

"What?" She asked, checking her pager on the waistband of her pink scrubs. "I didn't page you..." She mumbled checking the board to see who else could

"I got 999 - ICU" You blurted out, breathing in slowly. You could feel your heart pound against your chest.

"Let's go" Clarissa said, motioning with her head towards the door of the ICU. You followed her, placing your hands on your hips.

As you both walked in and moved to where Soap was, you could hear the steady beeping of the machines. Clarissa moved over to check his stats and you moved closer to the headrest, looking at Soap's face, still asleep but no longer intubated.

"Did he wake up?" You ask looking at Clarissa

"Think so, no longer intubated..." Clarissa said, trailing off at the confusion as to who would take his intubator out.

The doors of the ICU opened, and you both turned to look over. It was Dr Jones, dressed in blue scrubs, his brown hair slicked back, green eyes focused on you.

"Ah Dr Kaur, nice of you to respond to my page" He said moving the the end of the bed where Soap laid.

You looked at him in astonishment as he looked through the charts.

"You paged me 999?" You said bitterly

"Yes." He said looking up at you, smirking slightly "You performed an unauthorised medical procedure" He continued.

Unauthorised medical procedure, the words echoed in your brain, you were taken aback.

"Excuse me? I was paged by Peyton - Dr Marie - for an injury on one of the 141" You said, glaring at him as he moved around Clarissa, not making any eye contact with you.

"Yes, I am aware, but I have no official medical certificates to state you could operate" He said looking back at you, the same smirk lingered on his face. The smirk that made you want to slap off his stupid face.

"Official medical certificates?" You asked. Anger began to simmer in your blood "I was a Neuro registrar at Foxham, this was a neuro injury" You spat at him.

"So I have been told.." he sighed "But I also heard that you had a nervous breakdown a few months ago. Heard you went psychotic whilst on shift." He said glaring at you.

Those words hit you in your core. How could he know?

"I-I er" You stammered, looking down at the steel railing of the med bed where Soap was. Your heart began to race, and sweat began to seep from your skin.

"As a consultant, and therefore your superior, I want to see your medical certificates and records pronto" He declared moving over to you.

Clarissa watched him edge closer to you. Why was he doing this now? she thought.

"Dr Kaur did a fantastic job, without her I don't know if the patient would have survived" Clarissa said, speaking up and glaring at Dr Jones.

"I didn't ask for you opinion Clarissa" He huffed "I want to see those certificates, I am sure you can arrange to do that" He said

"What now?" You asked, still stunned at the revelation that he knew about that incident at Foxham.

Did Peyton tell him? Surely no... She would not do that... You think, your mind began to race with the possibilities of how he could know.

"Yes now." He said, giving you one final stare before walking out of the ICU, your head bowed down, staring at the laminated floor, your vision becoming hazy.

"What a cunt" Clarissa said moving to you, placing her hands on your shoulders. "You okay?" She asks, doe-eyed.

You look up, and tears formed in your eyes.

"Oh honey" Clarissa said and brought you in close to her, giving you a hug. You wrap your arms around her and began to sob. The tiredness and the sudden building of anxiety poured out of you like a broken dam. You sobbed into the scrubs that Clarissa wore, tears making patches of her pink scrubs darker.

"Honey, you did a great job. Sgt MacTavish is doing well." She said pulling away but grasping your shoulders tight, trying to reassure you. "I'm near the end of my shift, let's grab a coffee or tea?" She suggests

You bring your hands to your facing, wiping away tears and rubbing your tired eyes. Sniffling at the thought of Peyton betraying you.

"No, I need to go home. Get those certificates and prove to that asshole I am worthy of my title" You say sternly, grabbing a tissue from the box on the bedside table and blowing your nose.

"I'll give a lift, where do you live?" Clarissa asked

"Windsor, so about 30 minutes from base." You said

Clarissa nodded and then grabbed your arm and walked out of the ICU with you.

As the doors closed, Soap opened his eyes and looked up around him, still shocked at the conversation he overhead.

"He was a cunt" He muttered in agreement with Clarissa before closing his eyes again.

...

As you reached Clarissa's car, it was only once inside and looking at the dashboard you saw it was 17:36 pm. 12 hours ago you were in the OR with Peyton and Clarissa, delving deep into Soap. 12 hours later you were on your way back home, a place you hadn't been for almost 3 months.

Clarissa turned on the radio and inputted your address in the car's inbuilt navigation system. You laid back into the passenger seat, drained again, but determined to prove your worth to that bastard.

"What is his problem?" You blurt out

Clarissa briefly look at you and then turned her attention back to the road.

"I don't know, he's always been intimidated by strong women, even us nurses." She sighed

"Ever thought about complaining? You ask

"Yeah, but I just could not be bothered. I just hope he moves on up to a desk job soon" She replied

"Hmm" You mumbled

You closed your eyes and your head rocked gently side to side with the motion of the car, you let the noise of your thoughts fill your brain as Clarissa drove on, humming to the music that came out of the radio.

Twenty minutes later, you both had reached your home. It was a small apartment complex near the town centre. As Clarissa parked up, you took the keys out of your scrub pocket, and picked the key that would unlock your home.

"Mind if you stay here?" You ask, turning to Clarissa who smiled and nodded.

"Of course, I'll go to Sainsbury's and get you something to eat" She said pointing to the local Sainsbury's opposite where she had parked.

"OOoh, could you get me a chicken caesar wrap meal deal please" You ask, smiling slightly.

"Yeah, sure thing" She said smiling before opening the door and getting out. You follow her move and get out too.

"I shouldn't be long" You say

"Don't worry, take your time, I'll be here" She said, giving you grin before walking off to Sainsbury's.

You turn and sigh, and walk up to the door of the apartment complex, buzzing in the four digit code and walked in.

Heading up the stairs, you reach the outside of your apartment, staring at the white door, gazing into the peephole. Sliding the key in, you turn and it clicked, pulling the handle you open the door and walk in. The smell of lavender fills your nose, the plug-in air freshener was working it's magic and instantly calmed your nerves.

You gazed around your home. Taking it all in. Nothing had changed, the books on the bookshelf where still there. Curtains you had slightly drew where still in the same position. Walking over the fridge, you open it. It was of course empty apart from a few bottles of sauce. It was exactly how you'd left it.

Moving towards the door of your room, you walk in and dropped yourself on the purple sheets of your bed, groaning into the pillow.

Aches vibrated along your legs, arms feeling weak, your turnover and stare at the ceiling that was covered in small plastic glow in the dark stars, not glowing due to the brightness of the room. Sliding off the bed, you sit crossed legged on the rug beside the bed, and pulled out a green box from underneath and opened it. It was filled with personal pieces of paper that dictated your life so far.

GCSE and A-Level results, papers from the doctors, national insurance details, old pay cheques. You stopped as you got to a piece of paper that had the confirmation of a place in the cadets that had been signed by The Captain. The early beginnings of your military career. You placed it on top of the other papers and sifted through until your found an A4 envelope with all you training from medical school, your results and certificates from the exams taken as a junior doctor up until last year when you were about to undertake an exam that would've made you a consultant.

"Heard you went psychotic whilst on shift." That sentence echoed again in your head. Your mind flashed images of your breakdown, how you nearly hurt yourself and others during your episode... The lump in your throat began to form. Clearing your throat you rummaged deeper in the green box of memories of times long forgotten.

At the bottom of the box you saw something gold glisten in the light. You reach for it and realise it was framed photo, a photo of 5 soldiers, all in green fatigues laughing. There was you in the middle, your hair short and baring your teeth, to your left was KD and MG both also pulling funny smiles, and then to your right was The Captain and Simon Riley. You took in the four faces of the soldiers, all of whom were now dead and gone. Bringing the frame closer, analysing the details of their grins. With your thumb, your run it over Simon.

"I miss you Simon" you say, your voice slightly breaking as tears begin to fill your eyes. You look closer at him, his big grin making his eyes crinkle, he had lifted his head up slightly towards the Captain. You gazed at his neck, something familiar caught your eye.

The mole on his jugular was there, plain as day. You had seen that mole, that size and in that region before. You squinted harder, a slight tingle flowed through you.

"No way" You whisper, bringing the frame even closer that it nearly touched your nose.

There it was. It couldn't be a coincidence. That same mole in the same spot was also on Ghost.

Could it be.. that Ghost... was actually Simon Riley?

#modern warfare fanfiction #cod fanfic #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x medic #cod mw soap #simon ghost riley x doctor #fan fic ideas #angst #simon ghost riley x oc #simon ghost riley x original character #x poc reader #x oc #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley #thoughtsandboneswrites #thoughtsandbones #modern warfare ghost #modern warfare #cod ghost

34 notes · View notes