#it’s the shameless self promotion of it all

[mysticdevils]

love me till my lips turn blue

(ao3)

Other than the occasional coughing fit, Ryuu doesn’t make any noise in his sleep — he stays completely and utterly still.

It was odd and at first a bit off-putting, but thankfully Atsushi’s grown used to it over time. In fact, he would go so far as to say he’s felt grateful for it; it’s easy to tell when something is out of the ordinary.

Now is one of those times, because it tells Atsushi that Ryuu is awake. More than that, he’s thinking about something, which means Atsushi should wait for Ryuu to speak up instead of falling back asleep.

“Atsushi,” Ryuu eventually whispers. “Are you…”

When Ryuu trails off, Atsushi takes a brief moment to gather himself before he slowly sits up and turns to his side, resting his body weight on his elbow. “Awake?” he offers. Then he smiles. “I might be.”

Ryuu doesn’t startle at the suddenness of Atsushi’s response, but his eyes do widen a fraction. “Oh.”

“Oh,” Atsushi echoes. Then he raises an eyebrow and asks, “Did you want me to be? I can pretend to. Or you can have Rashomon knock me out — I won’t fight it.”

Ryuu squints at him, clearly unimpressed, before he sighs. “You don’t need to pretend,” he snaps, irritated, but his heart isn’t in it. “And Rashomon won’t hurt you anymore, you know that.”

He rolls his eyes. “And you know that the same thing goes for Byakko. It’s a moot point.” Then he gives a sigh of his own. “What’s wrong, Ryuu?”

Ryuu blinks rapidly. “What makes you think something’s wrong?”

Atsushi shrugs. “You make a certain face when something’s troubling you.”

“No I don’t,” Ryuu counters.

“Yes you do.”

“No I don’t.”

“Yes you — you know what? Never mind. I’ll take it back if you tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing is wrong, Atsushi,” Ryuu says quietly. “I just…”

Atsushi waits a moment, but it’s clear Ryuu doesn’t plan to continue. Atsushi holds his gaze and prompts, “You just…”

Ryuu swallows. “I just wanted to tell you that I love you, I suppose.”

Atsushi feels his mouth open a bit and his eyes widen a bit. He can feel the moisture suddenly building behind them and his heart feels so full he’s afraid that it might burst out of his chest completely, because it isn’t often that Ryuu says those three words.

That isn’t to say that he feels Ryuu’s love any less, or that he feels like something’s missing. After all, Ryuu shows it all the time in subtle yet obvious ways, and that’s enough for Atsushi.

He shows it by refraining from asking Atsushi about his nightmares after Atsushi tells him that he doesn’t want to talk about them. He just holds Atsushi and stays silent.

He shows it by allowing Atsushi to help him through a coughing fit despite Gin telling him he hates being touched during them. He even goes so far as to let Atsushi help clean him up after the worst ones.

He shows it by insisting that he be the one to sleep closest to the door. (Atsushi is content to let him think that being closer to the door will change the fact that the moment any danger presents itself, Atsushi will be blocking Ryuu from sight before Rashomon can so much as begin to move.)

Which is what makes it ironic that whenever Ryuu does say it, Atsushi tends not to say it back. Not that he doesn’t want to, because he wants to more than anything, but he doesn’t because that’s not what Ryuu wants.

Ryuu doesn’t want him to because even if he doesn’t understand why Atsushi loves him, he doesn’t doubt that he does — after all, Atsushi says it all the time. What he does doubt is that Atsushi knows about his love.

So instead all Atsushi does lean forward, tuck a stray strand of hair behind Ryuu’s ear, and whisper, “I know.”

Because he does, and the smile Ryuu sends him in response tells Atsushi that he believes him.

[auspicioustidings]

As a reminder there is one long form 141 x FMC fic that exists on ao3 and not on Tumblr because when I wrote it I had not yet made this blog (I had in fact been out of fandom so long I didn't know we were doing fics on Tumblr and I had no idea x reader was the popular thing).

It's very cute if I do say so myself and I still reckon it may be my best fic.

[hraugur]

@barb-l's one and only babygirl of all time vega can commit a little violence. as a treat

[alwaysforetells]

2024 tubbos

[deadbiwrites]

I've decided to sow some chaos in my life today

Here are the moodboards for all the AUs that live rent-free in my mind (and nowhere else), and I'd LOVE to talk about them!

[millaysmaeve]

elendil and míriel only you (1994) au moodboard

[manga-and-stuff]

I made another blog

It's called "Night Vale Clips unofficial" and, as the name implies, it's short clips from the Podcast "Welcome to Night Vale" without any context.

It's mostly spoiler free clips like sponsor reads or PSAs. Here's a taste of what you can expect:

[interdimensionalhellscapeportal]

i haven't actually linked my ongoing star wars ao3 fics to my star wars tumblr or vice versa before now, but y'know what, i like the weird niche au maul content i'm producing and i think some of y'all might enjoy it too.

write the fics you wanna read, right? i starting writing both of these alternate universes cos thus far, i have not stumbled on these concepts in my ao3 trawling. i really enjoy hearing from the handful of people that also like these extremely particular little worlds of mine, and i hope i find more of you to share them with crossposting here :)

THE FICS:

***Ka'ra Touched is a Smaul fic and currently in production hell, but has not been abandoned!***

Arla Fett is in the middle of her galaxy-spanning vengeance bloodbath, murdering all the Kyr'stad chakaare who ever abused her and living her best life after the Jai'galaare, a Mandalorian company of femme, queer, trans, nb & buir warriors, freed her from Tor Vizsla's abusive grasp and invited her to join their ranks.

When she finally goes after Meltch-karking-Krakko, the womp rat himself, she anticipates complications; he was, after all, the most sadistic of Vizsla's trainers. Killing Krakko is easier than she expects- but figuring out what to do with the tiny murder kitten of a zabrak she may have accidentally, impulsively, sort-of-maybe-just-a-little-bit kidnapped on her way out of Orsis Academy is much, much more difficult.

***Cleave (verb): to split or sever, to make a way through something forcefully; alternatively: to adhere strongly to (as in belief or pursuit), to become very strongly emotionally attached &/or involved with someone. Best described as 'porn with (too much) plot', this is the story of a writer constructing a series of increasingly outlandish scenarios intended to make pre-PTM Maul engaging in a tragic romance with a Jedi believable.***

Upon finishing his nearly disastrous mission to Cog Hive Seven, Darth Maul returns to his Master expecting criticism at the very least, punishment at worst. He does not expect to be told that his entire life has been a lie, that his Master is still a Sith Apprentice, and that he has been summoned to serve at the whim of the true Sith Master, Darth Plagueis.

Lord Plagueis, a monstrously powerful sadistic scientist, presents Maul with a test, and an ultimatum: prove himself worthy of the destiny that has been snatched from his grasp, a successor- perhaps even a replacement- for his Master, Lord Sidious... or be consigned to the bowels of the Sith laboratories at Aborah as an experimental subject. Maul has only one resource to aid him as he attempts to learn espionage, diplomacy, Sith alchemy and galactic etiquette in record time- Plagueis's captive Jedi Knight, experimental subject 1138, otherwise known as the infuriating togruta female Chaitali Zugasti.

He is not allowed to kill her. She wants nothing more than to die and stay dead, to be freed at last from Plagueis's nightmarish experiments, but if she is to die, she will die a true Jedi- attempting to save the boy raised in darkness that is enslaved alongside her and cannot see his chains.

[d-dormant]

should i start putting my fic chapter collages/posts here when i upload new stuff like i do on twitter?

[the-mediaeval-monk]

New post on my patreon!

[gentil-minou]

sharing my wangxian phlebotomist!wwx/blood donor!lwj au from twitter here (a summary here if you wanna see)

--

The hardest part of the adoption process was supposed to be endless paperwork and screenings and the anxiety of not being good enough to meet high standards of the court.

It wasn't supposed to be A-Yuan's first doctors appointment.

His pitiful screams fill the small doctor's office. He's clinging to Lan Wangji's shoulders like there a lifeline, hiding and all LWJ wants to do is bundle up his son and carry him back to safety.

But these are mandatory vaccines he needs in order to attend pre-k. So he cant.

Nurse: Shots are never fun at this age, huh He would beg to differ; they're never fun at any age But see lwj isnt afraid of the shots themselves. Hes terrified of the sight of blood. His BFF loves horror movies & he watches them with her bravely by staring at the corner of the tv

When lwj gets his blood drawn, he looks closes his eyes and imagines being in a cold pond somewhere. But he's never been afraid of just the shot before.

He's helpless in the face of his son's distress. The nurse sighs, saying theyll have to try again another day.

A-Yuan sniffles into his baba's shirt, exhausted from the crying fit. His eyes are still watery and he looks around the room with such fear in his eyes, before withdrawing back into the safety of his baba's chest.

Lan Wangji has no idea what to do, only cradles him closer

Thankfully, LWJ has someone who can help. His best friend, Jiang Yanli is a child therapist and has been helping him prepare his home for A-Yuan.

If anyone knows what to do, it's Yanli-jie

JYL: Zhanzhan, have you tried showing him its not scary?

LWJ has not, bc he's terrified

JYL is the only one allowed to call him Zhanzhan. In Uni she was the one who mentored him his first week of school. Someone slipped him alcohol and he got deliriously drunk.

Yanli-jie was the one who found him and took him home. This is what they told the cohort but actually…

JYL: seeing his Baba get a shot and be okay might motivate him to be more brave

LWJ certainly doesn't feel brave. He's thinking of the blood flowing from his veins and then LEAVING them to go who knows where. It sounds barbaric

He has the distinct memory of learning what a period is in middle school and promptly passing out

He is not a fan of anything related to blood

But LWJ has learned that Yanli-jie knows what she's doing, so, despite the way he can swear he feels his blood pumping with fear, he agrees...but there's a problem.

LWJ: I am up to date on all my shots. How can I show him it is safe?

JYL: Hmm....I have an idea. My brother is a phlebotomist! He can help.

LWJ is confused. Last he heard, the younger Jiang is a prosecutor who makes a living viciously yelling in a courtroom.

JYL: Not him, Zhanzhan. My adoptive brother, A-Xian. I bet he would be happy to help you. He works at the blood bank at Yiling Clinic! The perfect exposure!

For who?, LWJ wonders. A blood bank sounds like a house of horrors to him. And a person who chooses to stick a needle in people and remove the very force that gives them life? He cannot imagine getting along with this person at all.

--

Yiling Clinic is a community clinic in a part of town Lan Wangji has never been to, especially since the Gusu Group has their own private hospital.

But this is where Yanli-jie's phlebotomist little brother works.

A-Yuan clings to the back of his legs as they approach the receptionist, a young man with amazing cat eye makeup named Mo Xuanyu

These two definitely do not fit the bill for their usual patients, with their designer clothing, so he asks with some skepticism: Um, can I help you?

LWJ has spent the last two hours siking himself up for the blood part, he isn't prepared at all for social interactions. He flounders like a fish.

LWJ: …I am…We are here for…

A shout comes from behind them: Ah! A-Yu, is that A-jie's friend? Zhanzhan?

LWJ flinches until he sees a man sprinting towards them. The 1st thing he notices is this man is wearing lilac scrubs with little white rabbits on them.

The 2nd thing he notices is this man has the most enchanting smile he's ever seen. Already, LWJ feels more relaxed.

The man winks at him: You like the scrubs? A-jie said A-Yuan liked bunnies, I figured this would help keep him calm.

LWJ does not blurt I like bunnies too. But only just.

Beside the man is a pediatric nurse named Wen Ning, no relation, who says he's here to help with A-Yuan

Yanli-jie's little brother, the phlebotomist, introduces himself: Ah! Sorry, Lan Zhan. Jiejie always calls you that so it just stuck. I'm Wei Wuxian. You can call me Wei Ying if you wanna make it even.

Strangely, LWJ feels no need to correct him: Lan Zhan is fine, Wei Ying.

WWX smiles so brightly, LWJ feels dizzy with it.

WWX: Now where's the little bunny himself?

A-Yuan has been clinging behind LWJ's pant leg, tilting around just enough to peek with one eye at this strange gege.

WWX: Maybe not a rabbit then, a radish who likes to hide away!

A-Yuan becomes offended: I don't like radishes!

WWX laughs: Me neither! But Qing-jie says they help us grow big and strong, so they can't be all that bad huh?

WWX is crouched in front of A-Yuan, draping both arms across his knees and resting his chin in one hand. He waits.

LWJ admires his patience. The longer WWX waits, crouched and rocking back and forth in front of A-Yuan, smile gently and welcoming, the more A-Yuan's natural curiosity gets the better of him.

Eventually, his son comes out from behind his leg to touch a black bunny on his sleeve

A-Yuan: I like this one. We only have a white bunny at home.

WWX: I like the black bunny too! What's your bunny's name?

A-Yuan: Banana, bc she tries to eat Baba's banana every morning, and you are what you eat.

He recites this with all the solemnity a 4 yo could possess

WWX's laughter echoes through the lobby: Well! You're very right, A-Yuan. Maybe you aren't a radish after all then. Tell me, what do little boys eat?

A-Yuan: I'm not little! I'm 4 and a half!

WWX: Right, right, I sincerely apologize for my mistake. What do big boys eat then?

A-Yuan purses his lips and taps his chin, pondering his question carefully: Hmm… jelly beans?

WWX looks like he wants to laugh more, but instead says: I see, I see. Thank you for your wisdom A-Yuan.

He looks up at LWJ, dark eyes dancing. LWJ's heart rabbits against his chest

WWX: If your baba is ready, we can head down to my cave if you'd like. I have a lot of cool machines I'd love to show you.

A-Yuan's eyes widen into saucers as he gasps: A cave? Wowww

They grin conspiratorially at each other, before turning bright eyes up at LWJ

LWJ feels warm and much more relaxed inside, so he nods: Mn. We may go.

A-Yuan cheers and holds WWX's hand as the head downstairs.

LWJ trails behind making small talk with WN, watching WWX and A-Yuan swing their hands and skip ahead, feeling something warm blossom in his chest.

The hallway to Wei Wuxian's lab isn't anything like Lan Wangji expects.

The rooms at Gusu are all perfectly pristine and sterile, painted white to promote serenity, rest, and healing.

For one thing, he'd raided a Halloween store at some point and hung up all sorts of decorations, mostly vampire themed. There's one that's says "I vant to suck your blood!" except suck is crossed out and replaced with "donate". Wwx and A-yuan giggle together at wwx's fake accent

It's definitely not up to Gusu General's strict standards. For one thing, there're beanbag chairs in the hall outside. Wwx says it's to feel more comfy while others wait, as he's the only phlebotomist on staff and it can take a while. A-Yuan personally tests each one.

His lab is…adequate if far too small. There's a desk that's overrun with stacks of papers and textbooks and a shelf that's filled with even more. The actual space where blood is drawn is, thankfully, sterile and clean. Though he's decorated with demons demanding blood for food

There's a temp controlled room where the blood is stored, with a red door and the words "Blood Pool" written in menacing barely legible font

Despite the…interesting decor, the room is homely and, surprisingly, welcoming. A-Yuan at least is having a very fun time getting a tour

Wwx patiently answers all of A-Yuan’s questions, even the endless why's, with utmost sincerity, even when his answers are purely nonsense.

Lwj can't stop the fond smile from lifting the corner of his lips. A-Yuan had never warmed up to a medical professional so fast.

He's pulled from his musings when A-Yuan grabs his sleeve: Baba! Blood-gege says this machine makes blood spin around!

Wwx burst out laughing: Blood-gege? I love it!

Lwj is enchanted, head repeating those last 3 words again and again as wwx fondly ruffles A-Yuan's fluffy hair

Wwx: alright, now that you're familiar with my beauty Chenqing (referring to his bloody spinny machine lwj does not want to think about), shall we get down to business?

He says this with his bright dark eyes glittering at LWJ. Right. The blood donating part.

Lwj gulps, nodding. A prisoner walking up to the gallows.

TBC

(If you're interested, I'm probably going to continue at least up to the end of the first part before i just make it into one long fic! You can follow it on my twitter!)

[vaguesxrrow]

what do u mean ive written like 3 fics when i was supposed to be revising

the recent one i wrote w edwin literally wouldn't leave my mind until i finished it likeee 😭😭

[lineffability]

wanna read a post s2 fic where they go through the terrifying ordeal of being known but the knowing is both hard and painful AND full of catharsis and joy AND they keep making jokes and bickering bc that's part of the knowing too? a fic where they reconciliate, hut it happens slowly, and they make mistakes, and neither gives in easily AND neither regrets their actions entirely? a fic where they stand their ground AND meet halfway? where they not only apologize but still challenge each other? where the hurt is not erased but they build back better from it? a fic where they can't stay away from each other despite everything ? where they return to the bookshop together, and it's like when you come back home but you've grown up, not quite the same but still familiar, like a missing piece of you still lives in there somewhere? and maybe it's okay that things change? a fic where the metatron is the antagonist and muriel rises to the occasion and jesus is an old friend and both Crowley and Aziraphale are as utterly incompetent as they've ever been? a fic where they smash their faces together again??? that's what I wanna read!!!! so yeah that's why I'm writing it

[treluna4]

Happy pride month!

Here’s a fic I wrote 2 years ago in which Marcy Brewer is bi.

When I was younger

[improbable-implosions]

Hey look, it's another author permission book! I got VERY lucky that Matt Stephens was kind enough to let us show off this story, as it turns out that this was my first real look into the genre of solarpunk, at least in the realm of storytelling. Well, sort of, anyway. This book is actually an expansion on a free-to-read short story, called Miles Past Xanadu. I stumbled onto that story, and fell in love, not only with the world and characters, but also the way it points out the actually applicable discoveries, directly inspiring the ability to build on things in your real life!

Frequent readers of my own original work around here know, I'm a very big proponent of building, mending, and making my own stuff, so seeing that ethos appealed to as a way to invoke the hopeful tone of solarpunk has HEAVY influence on me.

Of course, that's not the only things I picked this book for, either! The story itself that's being told is quite fantastic, and I really hope you'll enjoy it as we work our way through it, piece by piece. Feel free to tune in in your favorite podcatcher, I hope I bring good voice to this tale!

[maideninorange]

All he wanted was just even one more day to live.

He regrets getting that wish.

A very personal (and cathartic) fic I wrote out in three days because I'm currently suffering from Pikmin brainrot lol. It's really, really bleak though, so be careful with this one if you give it a read.

(Warnings here are Species Dysphoria, Suicidal Thoughts, and some minor Body Horror. It's a bad end fic, and boy do I write it like one.)