#it’s on ff.net too if you prefer to read it that way but i think this way is nice

[quicktimeeventfull]

oh hey it’s fic back friday. let me please recommend a fic from 2004 which i still think about on a weekly basis.

just that and paper cranes by darkeyedwolf

lawlight

1.5k words

this is a bit of fluff-with-some-melancholy (or melancholy-with-some-sweetness) which takes place during the yotsuba arc. L realizes light has nothing at all to do and gets him some origami paper with which to entertain himself. light discovers that he isn’t perfect at every single thing on earth.

it’s really lovely and really gentle. if you want something sweet and simple and quiet, you should give this one a try.

[minniethemoocherda]

Connect This Space Between

Summary: "PRIME! YOUR SPARKLING IS CURRENTLY OVERCHARGED ON HIGHGRADE IN MY MEDBAY!"

A/N: This takes place a few weeks before the start of my fic Iridescent. But you shouldn't have to read that for this to make sense. In my head Bumblebee is around the equivalent of seventeen here whilst the twins are about nineteen. Also sorry! I am on a hype right now! So I couldn't wait until Sunday to post this! What did you guys think of the new Transformers One trailer? Anyway hope you enjoy! Xxxxxxx

Ao3

FF.net

"PRIME!"

Optimus jerked awake at the sound Ratchet's voice shouting over his internal comms, accidently knocking to the floor a pile of datapads that he must've fallen asleep on top of.

"Yes Ratchet?" Optimus said, bending down to place the fallen datapads back onto his desk.

"You're sparkling is currently overcharged on highgrade in my medbay."

Optimus nearly dropped the datapads again in shock.

"Is Bumblebee okay?" He asked, concern for his ward over riding the many questions that statement posed.

"He's as fine as one can be after drinking an entire bottle of the twins' moonshine." Ratchet answered, the familiar cranky tone, reassuring Optimus that the damage was not too serious.

"I am on my way."

As Optimus marched towards the medbay, the questions previously overridden, now sprung to the forefront of his mind.

Why would Bumblebee be drinking? How did he gets his servos on the twin's secret stash? And what would possess him to drink enough of it to end up in Ratchet's medbay?

It didn't make sense to Optimus that the newspark that he had found in the ruins of The Well could be drinking.

Although he guessed that he shouldn't be too surprised considering that Bumblebee was due to get his final upgrades in a couple of weeks. Optimus supposed that it was only natural that Bumblebee would get curios about such things.

Outside the medbay, Prowl was currently reading Sideswipe and Sunstreaker the riot act, listing off all of their current offences which included but not limited too; indecent behaviour, production of moonshine and serving said moonshine to an underage mechling. The twins faces paled under the scrutiny, whether that was from their own over indulgent high grade consumption or from their dawning realisation of how much trouble they were in, Optimus was unsure. He suspected that most likely, it was a mixture of both.

Inside, Bumblebee appeared the picture of misery. He was hunched over the edge of a berth with his doorwings drooped and his head in a bucket.

His eyes widened in panic when he spotted Optimus standing the doorway.

He opened his mouth, probably to protest that he hadn't been caught drinking when he was cut off by his own spew, regurgitating into the bucket.

Optimus hurried across the medbay to his side. No matter the circumstances, the Prime hated seeing his sparkling in pain.

He rubbed the space between Bumblebee doorwings like he had when he was little until eventually the young bot had finished emptying his energon tank.

Ratchet switched the now full bucket for an empty one.

"Am I dying?" Bumblebee slurred.

Ratchet snorted.

"You're going to wish you are when you're sober enough for me to give you my dangers of underage drinking lecture!"

Optimus thought that was a bit ironic coming from the mech who's nickname growing up had been The Party Ambulance. But since Optimus preferred not having a wrench thrown at his head, he tactfully decided not to mention that.

"I'm sorry." Bumblebee mumbled, sounding so dejected that regardless of the splashes of energon now staining the bot's front Optimus couldn't help but put his arm around him.

For the first time in months Bumblebee didn't shrug him off, instead leaning into his touch. Over the past few years as his sparkling came ever closer to adulthood, Bumblebee had sought comfort from his guardian less and less. Even if the only reason Bumblebee was permitting it was due to his lessoned inhibitions, Optimus felt his spark warm.

"I should hope that this experience has been enough of a lesson for you to learn from without the lecture." Optimus said.

Bumblebee nodded, nuzzling against his shoulder.

Growing up in a war, Bumblebee's childhood had been anything but traditional. He'd never had the chance to go to just school or the cinema or the park. Until recently he'd never even met any cybertronians his own age before.

No, instead Bumblebee's childhood had been a serious of safe houses and self defence lessons.

In a strange way, Optimus was glad that Bumblebee was getting in trouble for normal mechling things for once. Not that he was going to tell Bumblebee that.

At least Bumblebee's first fore into high grade hadn't ended with him throwing up on Alpha Trion's prized organic scroll collection.

"Drink this." Ratchet ordered, interrupting Optimus's thoughts as he thrust a glowing purple liquid under Bumblebee's nose.

Bumblebee looked nauseous again at the idea of anything more to drink, but under Ratchet's glare reluctantly took a sip.

"Good now you shouldn't have to waste any more of my time again tomorrow morning because of a hangover."

Optimus fought the urge not to show his smile. As despite Ratchet's gruff words, he knew that the medic's actions showed the not so secret soft spot Ratchet had for the sparking. Because if it had been anyone else in this position, they would've been thrown straight to the brig to sober up the hard way.

"Now, Prime can walk you back to your room so you don't end up in any more trouble." Ratchet stated as he started to clean up.

"I'm okay." Bumblebee protested.

"Oh really?" Ratchet drawled. "Walk in a straight line for me."

Bumblebee pushed the bucket aside as he stood up on his unsteady feet. He didn't even make it one step before nearly faceplanting the floor. Luckily, Optimus managed to catch him by his scruff bar before he could do any more damage to himself.

Even in his drunken state, Bumblebee must've known that resistance would he futile as he didn't put up anymore fight when Optimus scooped him up.

Gone were the days when Optimus could lift Bumblebee with only the palm of his hand. But even on the edge of adulthood, Bumblebee was still a small bot. Optimus cradled him close, arms securing the bot's legs and back, allowing Bumblebee to rest his against his shoulder. Optimus easily carried the mech to his quarters.

Once there, he gently placed Bumblebee down on the berth, tucking the blanket of tarp under the mechling's chin.

As Ratchet's potion kicked in and Bumblebee drifted off, Optimus glanced around the room that was the closest place the young bot had ever had to a home. On shelves sat scavenged action figures from shows he'd never watched, attached upon the painted walls that showed sights he would never see. And by his bed, a set of twins knives that Optimus had tried to talk Jazz out of giving to him.

Because as much as Optimus wished that he could, he would not be able to protect the former sparkling from the horrors of the world. Something that even without a war, would still ring true. One way or another, Bumblebee was always going to grow up.

With a new sense of acceptance, Optimus was about to leave he heard a quiet voice mumble;

"Love you sire."

Optimus smiled, walked back across the room to place a kiss on the helm of his sleeping sparkling.

"I love you too."

[redmelawashere]

I was wondering if you have any opinions on top/bottom dynamics for involving Sasuke. Usually I’m like a live and let live type of person when it comes to fic and all that, but sometimes when people write Sasuke as more of a bottom, I think it’s taking the piss on his character just a bit. Idk but sometimes I feel people take it a bit too far and out of character for what a character like him would do versus what we as fans would LIKE him to do.

LMFAO ANON YOU REALLY WOKE UP AND CHOSE VIOLENCE TODAY HUH?!

This is so funny and people get so heated over this, so I'll bite.

Honestly I don't entirely disagree, but I think things are changing. Lemme explain. When the SNS fandom was younger (back on ff.net and I was a tween reading shit I shouldn't have been - and also back in the 2010s) I think there was a lot of toxic ways of viewing and portraying gay relationships. One always had to be the "woman" and the one who took it in the ass was viewed as that "submissive" and "fem" one in the relationship.

I think the fandom - and society in general tbh - are now more vocal in recognizing that this is kind of toxic and a very heteronormative (or at the very least, binary) way of portraying queer relationships.

So if you would have asked me this a few years ago, I would have said mostly yeah - Sasuke is this arrogant, power-hunger, and domineering character and if portrayed in a way contrary to his personality, I would totally view it as OOC. But as this fandom (and this pairing in particular) has matured there are more and more fics where bottom!Sasuke can be perfectly in character and it doesn't degrade his personality for a sexual preference. I've also seen a lot of people who write true SNS (where they switch) portray this as a huge act of vulnerability and trust that takes Sasuke time and that's part of his character journey.

But also, some people just wanna write Sasuke being an OOC brat and getting raw dogged and that's totally okay too. It just doesn't match my freak, personally, but like I think we also just need to be a lot more accepting in fandom of how we portray our favs in whatever made-up-fictional situation we see them in. And just like. Let people write what they want lol.

[roseus-eli]

Welcome to my blog!

My name's Eli! (can be pronounced as e-lie or el-ee)

Everything you need to know is under the cut. :)

@angelic-pinkheart is my 2nd blog!

The LGBTQIA+ community is welcome here. :3

I do not have a specific DNI list, I think it's unnecessary, and I just block according to my preferences.

I mostly go by the pronouns she/her and they/them (mostly femme aligned), but he/him pronouns are fine too! Mixed pronouns are not a problem for me, either.

I am an afab bisexual aceflux (leaning towards asexuality) demigirl/genderqueer :)

I'm a minor. If you do anything that makes me uncomfortable, I won't hesitate to block you.

I'm Filipino, but I mostly speak English, although I'd be glad to talk to some fellow filos!

I love reading, especially books and fanfics! I also enjoy listening to music and sleeping. I also write, but I rarely post my written works anywhere.

My super duper besties are @cheeeryisaro and @jhikebipolar! You guys should check them both out sometime. :)

My online bestie is @amy-harper!

To all my fandom friends, you guys are also my besties. :]

My favorite fandoms and ships:

Honkai: Star Rail

No specific ships.

The Big Bang Theory

Sheldon/Amy (Shamy for life!)

Leonard/Penny (Lenny, my cuties)

Howard/Bernadette

Penny/Amy, because why not

Stuart/Denise

There might be more if I'm being honest…

Death Note

Light Yagami/L Lawliet

Light Yagami/Misa Amane

Light Yagami/Misa Amane/L Lawliet (I actually don't care too much about this one)

Doctor Who

The Doctor/The Master

The Doctor/River Song

Rose Tyler/The Doctor

Thirteen/Yaz

And many more because there are way too many ships to count

Detroit: Become Human

No specific ships.

Daria

Daria Morgendorffer/Jane Lane

I haven't really thought too much about the ships but here is another obvious one, Helen Morgendorffer/Jake Morgendorffer

Good Omens

Aziraphale/Crowley (ineffable husbands)

Archangel Gabriel/Lord Beelzebub (ineffable bureaucracy)

Again, there's probably more…

Spy × Family

Loid Forger/Yor Forger

Anya Forger/Damian Desmond

There's probably more fandoms I'm in but I lost count

(Keep in mind, I do occasionally reblog something that isn't related to my favorite fandoms :3)

My AO3 account: roseus_eli

My FF.net account: roseus-eli

also pls don't steal my pfp, I made it myself ;3

(This intro post will be updated every now and then.)

[morocosmos]

Writer Interview Game

Tagged by @arcaneoddity, tyyyy 💜

When did you start writing?

I noodled at an unfinished story or two when i was a kid (i drew comics a lot more tbh), the first fanfic i wrote was when i was 13 (it is consigned to ff.net, never to be perceived again). i started developing my writing during secondary school, we had to for english class but i genuinely enjoyed those assignments so much that it didn't feel like schoolwork lmao, it was smth of an outlet. i did write a couple of fics for other fandoms between 2016 and mid 2020, but in late 2020 FFXIV revived my desire to create, while @stellarfatalism and @lemoncakedesign's fics inspired me to actually start writing.

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

I read a much wider variety of smut than what i could be convinced to write. other than that i think they mostly overlap.

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

@haillenarte, @rabbitprint and @sezja's fics have stuck with me the most in terms of "god i want to be able to write characters like this"....i've never been compared to another writer before, never even considered it and idk how i'd feel.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

I was writing on openoffice at first, but their software has a tendency to crash when you press two keys too fast, for example when you. try to save your work. moved to gdocs to avoid that and so that i could continue working on fic on my phone, but i also use the notes app on there, mainly to get down ideas that i don't want running away or to write more freely. it's easier to be experimental and loose when i'm writing in notes, idk, whereas i prefer sitting at the desk and working on my computer when it's a longer fic or a more """important""" piece.

What’s your most effective way to muster up a muse?

I've let it happen when it happens, for the most part. i was forcing myself to power through job around the time i really grew into writing, so i needed it to be a space where i wouldn't do it if i didn't want to. my feelings about that are more mixed now, because i'm a slow writer to begin with, and i can't help but wonder if more people would read my stuff if i updated more consistently. but i digress - the only time i've had to bring the muse in myself was for to sail your seas, and that was because there was accountability and a deadline. so i guess my most effective tricks are ADHD hacks and brainworms.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

Until recently i didn't approach fic writing with themes in mind, when i get an idea it's usually about throwing a character at something and seeing what happens. that something tends to be another character, sometimes it's more existential like touch starvation. that said, i do have a WIP where i sat down and thought about what i want the themes to be before i know how it's going to pan out, but it's baby's first attempt so i don't have an answer to this question yet, really.

What is your reason for writing?

Processing things i know and exploring things i don't. when i got back into writing in 2020 it was extremely cathartic, i've burnt out on several creative pursuits over the years and having that spark come alive was, and is still very precious to me. i spent two years writing simply because i had ideas and a vice-grip compulsion to write them out. now that that's slowed down, i've started to think more about craft, and how i might try to hone that when i'm lowkey afraid of this stage of learning, and there's no formal institution to kick my ass into it. but in some ways, i think i write because i can't afford not to.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I've been told by a friend that i'm good at continuity, which is nice considering it lines up with the obsessive approach i take towards trying to tie plot/character threads together lol. personally, i still consider descriptive writing to be my greatest strength. it's what i keep going back to, maybe because it was the first thing i discovered i was good at that wasn't influenced by someone else's decision.

How do you feel about your own writing?

I miss the honeymoon period when i thought my writing was the hottest shit LOL. that tapered off towards the end of 2022, but it's not like i think my writing is bad now, just that over time i became more aware of my shortcomings, and how much knowledge and experience i lack. i did have to fight a little to keep my relationship with writing from souring last year, but in hindsight it was more about frustration that i didn't have the energy to write (work burnout wooo) than a problem with writing itself. after a year plus of stalling and big fic projects i just want to have fun again, be a bit silly.

[worldismyne]

Kirona fics recs.

"@worldismyne thank you! I'll check it out! Yeah, I'd love some recs. I prefer Crona as a boy (trans or cis) but I still like fics with them as non-binary or a girl."

------

Alright, it's been a hot minute since I read some of these, so any ff.net recs are vaguely remembered through rose color glasses, but they def left an impact on me.

Masc recs...

The Lycan and the Vampire (T - Incomplete)

Summary: Crona is a lycan via bitten. Kidd is a vampire by birth. Kidd hates the lycans. Crona doesn't know how to deal with a vampire. Male!CronaXKidd. Rated T for sexual references mentioned mostly by a Lycan

Review: I am paranormal romance cringe. I remember this fic being the first I remembered when thinking of good MxM Kirona. The AU was fairly well world built as well.

Kid x Crona : Hades and Persephone (G - Hiatus)

Summary: Have you ever wondered if there was more to the story of Hades and Persephone? That there was more than what was said in stone?

Review: This is a mythology AU. I just got started with this one, but I'm a sucker for greek mythology. Seems pretty cute so far.

The Difference Between Us (M - Incomplete)

Summary: An ongoing Death the Kid x Male!Crona fanfic. Kid shows Crona what it means to be loved. Slow paced and many chapters long.

Review: tldr, have not read this one, 1st person is not my jam. But, the people for people who do like it (according to other reviews) it's got solid characterization and is a decent long fic to settle in with.

NB recs...

Beneath All the Hate and Despair (T - Incomplete)

Summary: Even after switching sides and making peace with most of Maka's friends, Crona has a rocky transition into Kid's good graces. Things get even more difficult when traces of Medusa crop up. An exploration of two wildly different but curiously similar people that come closer together. Mostly canon compliant, but an AU of sorts. NB Crona. (Revamped fic)

Review - This is the OG for me, and by that I mean how young me found out about they/them pronouns. (I didn't really get it at the time, but I still read the whole thing AND the author went back 10 years later to do another copy edit once they had more expirence. Mad respect.)

Stir the Cauldron (T - Updating)

My summery: A continuation of the manga where Kid uses his new powers to help save Crona.

Review - Really nice getting to see Kid adjust to being the new Lord Death, the internal dialogue is really on point. Bonus points for addressing Ragnarok and having Crona be artificially made (gotta be one my fav HC).

Devestation Rots (NR - Complete)

Summary: In which Kid is shattered by the loss of two people very important to him.

Review: Cute hurt/comfort two-shot. Bonus points for Liz/Patty + Kid in a sibling dynamic.

-----

I read mostly fem!Chrona longfics way back. So The Birth of Scelus the Kishen and Child Born of Love are the absolute classic longfics that have survived (I could have sworn there were four or five others, they may have been deleted). But both of them are complete and rated T. I have 0 clue how well they've held up, but they got me through many a class and roadtrip growing up.

There is 10 pages of fics on ff.net (the ship predates the ship filter feature. So just pop in romance into genre and only have them as the listed characters). There used to be more, but like I said, people like to delete their old stuff.

キックロ or Kikkuro is the ship name in Japanese if you ever want to look for art on other sites. I know there were a few doujins back in the day, but very few were translated to English at the time.

It's so interesting to see a ship that used to be in the main trifecta of ships fall out of favor. I'm mostly writing for other ships now too, so I'm not complaining lol.

Daughter of Madness is the longest fic I ever wrote and now with the sequel, they've fully transitioned from she/her egg to they/them god X'D

I still love these two together in any interpretation. So if you ever get brainrot or wanna talk headcanons, my inbox is open lol.

EDIT 10 Pages of fics when browsing on mobile, 28 if you're on web.

[yuniemaki]

tagged by @cadriona you have all my love and undying support, even should i become an undead i will come back to bang on your doors so you'll finish your UNFINISHED WORKS.

how many works do you have on ao3?

39, I don't know what are anon'ed works, lalala

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

492,719

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Genshin... once upon a time in the ff.net days I wrote for Dragon Age, Claymore, Air Gear and Skyrim/Oblivion too, but these days a certain lesbian couple from Genshin lives rent-free in my head, y'know?

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

BY KUDOS??? 😭 1. Dancing in circles 2. Trust in the stars 3. a gift from the stars 4. Welcome back, my Captain 5. Even if it's selfish, I still want you to stay

5. do you respond to comments?

Yes I love all comments they make me squeal because wow someone found my shit in a sea of food and went, "damn I'm gonna talk to the person who pooped this shit out!" I'm honoured. Work sometimes makes me slow but I read every comment and spend way too long thinking about how I should respond HELP

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I... I don't do angsty endings... there is a fic with one, but it's currently locked because it's for a zine. I'll share when it's out :P

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

THAT'S EVERYTHING HELLO. ANGST WITH HAPPY ENDING MY BELOVED

8. do you get hate on fics?

probably, but I don't see it, so eh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

you do not ask yunie what smut she writes.

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written?

i hardly write crossovers... it's enough trouble to make sure my ideas are potentially canon-compliant, nevermind making sure they could be accepted as canon for TWO universes. I wrote one for Skyrim x Genshin though. beiguang but dark brotherhood x pirate. :D

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

naur i'm not that amazing

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

sadly nope tho i would be honoured

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope, i've done that plenty in classes and am honestly not a fan, but i'm sure it works for people who are very in-tune!

14. what's your all time favourite ship?

beiguang. my beloved. they pulled out 500k words from me and still counting after a 10-year hiatus. amazing

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

one that's been sitting in the pile for a while... about ningguang faking her death and beidou finding out like a year later. no, i don't have anything beyond that line :(

16. what are your writing strengths?

i think i write dialogue pretty well

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i'm often too lazy to edit, and i slack a lot on descriptions because... yeah, i'm too lazy for my own good. :/ i can also get really impatient with longer fics like i'll get angry that i'm not at the scene i really want to write, count the number of chapters i still have to do to reach there, then close the doc in rage.

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i don't really like it, because it's kinda immersion-breaking for me. i prefer to write it all in english but state that the character is speaking in xxx language instead

19. first fandom you wrote for?

Claymore, with OCs!

20. favorite fic you've written?

beiguang mafia au with their version of a happy ending. I love my beiguang twisted, obsessive and somewhat toxic

tagging @canonical-transformation, @aurilium, @mireillexy, @dreamerinsilico @asharinhun, @narcoticwriter and anyone else who wants to answer! OPEN TAG!

[tranakin-skywalker]

if you’re looking for fic recs, you may enjoy “the price of forgetting” by lautdalam. It’s part of the series “bang the war-drums” and it involves an earlier attempted Darth Vader redemption (I say attempted because Vader tries! He’s just. Continuously being handed L’s by the universe at large). I may know some clone wars fics if that’s what you prefer too :)

Band the War-Drums is actually an old favorite of mine. This ask actually prompted me to go back and start rereading it lol. So thanks.

I do love a story where Vader's obsessive dad instincts zero in on Leia instead of Luke. There's just something so fun about it, I think partially because their familiar connection in the OT is treated like an after thought (because it kind of was *cough* Nellith *cough*) so having it be the focal point of a story instead is something I really really enjoy.

And yeah, throw those recs my way, I'm always looking for more. There's a fair chance I might have already read those too tho lol. I just checked my ao3 history and I've read/checked out just under 1,500 Star Wars fics since I got back into the fandom two years ago. And that's not even counting the ones I've dug up on ff.net and theforce.net lmao

[rahuratna]

HI RAHU HI！！！！thank you for your kind words to by the fireplace 😭🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️ (i have not read it properly yet because i am busy with errands. sorry ! i will respond later) i always notice how you leave such kind and thorough feedback to a lot of writers on tumblr.

writing can be demotivating because we can be very hard on ourselves when pursuing our craft. so i thought that writers owe it to each other to give hope and encouragement. you are one of the people i noticed that goes the extra mile with this, so i think you are amazing for that !

have you always loved reading? are there authors who influenced the way you engage with stories? i became very curious about your relationship to reading！！🥰

Hi @yasu-1234 !!

Thank you 🥰 And yes, I think that particular practice of mine comes with the territory of being part of ao3 and ff.net for many years. Not all of those years were productive for me (one of my fics had an 11 year hiatus, during which I wrote absolutely nothing, and was completed just recently!)

I only recently started writing and posting my fics on Tumblr, even though I've had a Tumblr account for a while now. Being part of the Tumblr community, and the interactions I've had here, has had a huge impact on both the evolution of my writing and my desire to write more.

Writing on other platforms was a tad lonely at times, and I knew that other writers felt the same, so I would make sure to leave detailed reviews on fics that I enjoyed! While work and life put a lot of time constraints on me, I do try to keep this practice up.

I have always loved reading! I was the ghost that haunted the school library, even during the holidays, lol. Although science fiction, fantasy and mystery are my preferred choices, I read anything I can lay my hands on, from journal articles in my area of qualification, to biographies and memoirs. Authors whose works I appreciate include Margaret Atwood, Ruth Rendell, Umberto Eco, Conan Doyle, Terry Pratchett, Ursula le Guin, Robert Harris, China Mieville and Liu Cixin. 🥰 There are many other new authors whose work I am currently reading, too many to name!

[snowbellewells]

Self Promo Sunday: "I Put A Spell On You (Because You're Mine)"

This mini-MC really belongs more with the October/spooky postings probably, but I wanted to get it in before I started with my November and Thanksgiving re-runs. I've always been pleased with how this late season 4 canon divergent fic turned out, and I'm trying to gain it a little more love and a few more eyes to see it. It was written right after the 4b episode "Sympathy for the DeVil" (so 4x17? 4x18?) and picks up pretty much where that episode left off. My idea for how the Darkness would lure Emma, and even how it would manifest, was way different than the way the show took it, so this is now definitely canon divergent from that point. If you read this again, or if you're seeing it for the first time, I hope you'll enjoy!

Summary: He's been watching the changes for weeks now, worrying about her well-being and the demons she's fighting... When it all goes crazy, will he be able to help her step back from the brink? (A 4B chaptered story, taking off somewhere near 4x18, and carrying on from there. CS, obviously and all the way)

***Also available from the beginning on AO3 or ff.net, if either of those are your preference...***

by: @snowbellewells

i. darkness creeps in

The deepening purplish circles under her eyes have been growing ever more pronounced, worrying him for weeks now. She is both anxious and jittery, yet bone-weary and weighed down by the cares upon her shoulders. Emma Swan surely thinks that she has hidden her stress and fatigue well, but to one who knows her (and he does know her – as well as she will allow anyone to) the strain is beginning to show.

When they part ways at night now, she tilts her face up to his, grinning a warm, secretive smile and awaiting his gentle kiss, and he tucks her hair behind her ear, cradles her cheek in his hand, profoundly happy to steal a few moments alone with her. Yet, he also finds himself near to biting a hole in his tongue to keep back his words of caution for her, his fear that she is pushing herself too hard, too far, too soon. He cannot risk driving a wedge between them or making her run – not now. She is already keeping her distance from her parents, no longer staying with them in the loft. He has gone back to his ship since the Jolly’s return to him, and so has offered her the use of his room at Granny’s – paid for the month in doubloons that the old woman bit to check for authenticity, then grinned conspiratorially, accepted, and ferretted away in some hidden pocket of her skirts. However, he wonders if Emma paces the floor all night, or haunts the library seeking answers with an equally sleepless Belle, or simply drives aimlessly for hours; whatever it is she does, he can plainly see that she is not resting.

Killian Jones is not a man afraid of much on this wide earth’s surface, but Emma turning her back on him now and walking away is a haunting phantasm that never truly leaves his mind. And it is no longer simply the pain he knows he will feel, but the fact that she needs his support more than ever. He is more afraid for her safety and her sanity than he has ever been, and he does not know what method to try.

Those worries and fears all come to a head as he skids to the edge of the cliff face, behind a stunned, crushed-looking Mary Margaret and David, where he can clearly see Emma and Henry clinging tightly to one another frantically; panting, near tears, and much too close to the drop-off, but at first glance seeming whole and unharmed. He does not know where the rotten banshee who tried taking Henry has gotten to, has missed the entire showdown due to what he knows must have been Gold’s trickery and machination with the shell and Henry’s voice. He wanted to be there and have his Swan’s back, but he feels intense relief to see that she seems to have done just fine on her own.

A rush of air brushes along his skin as Regina charges up behind him, nearly bowling them all over as she calls out her son’s name in a voice harsh with desperation, clearly having been slowed by a similar deception to the one which fooled him. Killian merely steps back so that she can see her boy has been saved and reach him.

It is only as Regina falls to her knees on Henry’s other side, pulls him into her arms, and Emma shifts back slightly, that he is hit by a jolt of fear upon getting a good first look at her face. The reddened irritation beneath her lovely eyes has taken on an even more pronounced hue, making her look angry and more than a bit unhinged. He takes a weak step forward, wishing to soothe, to comfort…but then she leans to peer over the edge. Killian realizes in a flash that Cruella must have gone off the precipice, that the villainess is truly finished, no longer a threat. However, he is frozen in place, a chill of foreboding running down his spine, when Emma turns in his direction once more.

Her gaze is unfocused, not resting on any of them, but turned inward as if contemplating what she thinks of Cruella’s demise. Killian’s heart does not truly splinter until he sees a small, ill-suited little grin of satisfaction sneak over Emma’s lips…almost as if she is pleased with what she has done.

And he knows. Knows with the sinking certainty of one who has crawled back out of the pit and still clearly remembers the darkness’ pull, that something inside of his beautiful Emma has turned. A bit of his Savior’s shining, bright light has gone out.

Tagging a few who might enjoy: @searchingwardrobes @kmomof4 @jennjenn615 @whimsicallyenchantedrose @laschatzi @jrob64 @apiratewhopines @hollyethecurious @artistic-writer @winterbaby89 @teamhook @revanmeetra87 @resident-of-storybrooke @scientificapricot @tomeandflickcorner @ohmakemeahercules @stahlop @anmylica @justanother-unluckysoul @sotangledupinit @booksteaandtoomuchtv @xsajx @lfh1226-linda @jonesfandomfanatic @motherkatereloyshipper @eastwesthomeisbest @xarandomdreamx @kazoosandfannypacks @spartanguard @therooksshiningknight @tiganasummertree @optomisticgirl @elizabeethan @the-darkdragonfly @donteattheappleshook @drowned-dreamer @goforlaunchcee @shireness-says @ineffablecolors

[just-absolutely-super]

A Special Gift

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BEST BOYS!

Summary: It's Lan's birthday and he eagerly awaits for his father to come home early from work. What he doesn't know is he'll be getting a special gift from his father...

Timeline: MMBN gameverse pre-canon

Rating: G

Read it on FF.net /// AO3

“Happy birthday, Hub!”

MegaMan smiles almost sadly at the words. For the last few years since he gained consciousness, he’s only heard that phrase coming from his father. Considering his father and a select few SciLab employees are the only individuals who interact with him, he doesn’t see a reason to expect anything more on this day.

But his feelings on the matter aren’t important because this birthday is meant to be a very special one. And not just for him…but for his brother too.

“Ready for your present?” Yuichiro asks in a slightly giddy way most fathers do on their child’s day of birth.

MegaMan raises an eyebrow, his smile wry, “Wouldn’t it be more appropriate to ask if I’m ready to be a present?”

His father chuckles in response, “True, but I feel this is as much of a present to you as it is to Lan. After all, you two are finally going to be reunited for good.”

The blue Navi feels something inside his being warm up at the words. While Lan comes to visit SciLab and watches Yuichiro work with programs, MegaMan is not always conscious to truly get to know him—having to be put in sleep mode as his father works on him. He’s also been in a base form too, the details of what he will end up looking like still a mystery to many. To his brother, he’s just a special “custom” Navi that his father is working on, and maybe one day he would be operated by Lan.

One day is now today, June 10th, or the day Hub and Lan Hikari were born. And currently, Lan is at home with their mother, probably impatiently waiting for his father to come home. What he doesn’t know is that Papa would be giving him a very special birthday present—a brand new NetNavi.

“So, are you ready?” Yuichiro asks MegaMan again, as if he’s afraid the answer would be a no.

MegaMan smiles to reassure any doubts his father has. “Yes, I’m ready!”

Papa smiles in satisfaction but then it lowers considerably as he looks off to something on his desk, “I’m going to warn you, I’ll have to put you in a box. It’ll be dark and may feel cramped… Maybe I should put you in sleep mode until Lan opens it?”

MegaMan shrugs, no preference in his mind. “I don’t mind, Papa. It’ll be nice to wake up to Lan’s excited face.”

That seems to bring a sparkle into his Papa's eyes, “Oh yes, I think that would be a nice sentiment! Alright, we’ll do it. Have a good nap, Hub!”

“I’ll see you when I wake up, Papa.” And with that, the PET goes into sleep mode, the screen darkening, giving no indication if the Navi is truly there or not.

Despite the anticipation he feels, there’s a small sense of sadness in Yuichiro’s heart. How he wishes things to be different… Instead of putting his first born in a box to be opened up by the second born, he should be celebrating the day with both of them alive and together.

But fate had other plans, and there is nothing more he can do about it. With a sigh, he puts together the package, carefully placing MegaMan’s PET inside the box before lovingly wrapping it up in dark blue paper; a large red ribbon tied into a neat bow as the final touch. If his wife were here, she would laugh at how careful and precise he had performed the task, and he would have protested in response. This isn’t something you could throw together haphazardly, after all!

Once he’s finished, Yuichiro clocks out and says his goodbyes to his colleagues, making excited steps toward his car to make the drive back to ACDC Town. As he gently places the giftwrapped PET in the passenger seat, he starts the car, thinking of Lan and hoping his son isn’t driving his mother too mad with the impatience of his father’s arrival.

-----------

A little boy, now the age of 8 as of today, crawls onto the couch in his living room to get a better look out of the window. He cranes his head left and right, biting his lip in worry when he doesn’t see a familiar car.

“Lan Hikari, get down from there!” his mother chides him from her place in the kitchen. Her hands are on her hip and there’s a displeased frown on her beautiful face.

“But Mama, Papa’s still not here! Where is he?” little Lan asks as he continues to stare out the window.

“Even though he made arrangements to leave work early, he still has to work regardless. Give him some time. He’ll be here,” Haruka soothed. She won’t let it show, but she has been antsy all morning. She and Yuichiro had discussed this day many times and her husband had told her earlier in the week that all his preparations are finished—Hub, or rather MegaMan, would be coming home today.

She hopes his words still remain true. She wants this “reunion” as much as him. She makes a silent prayer that the upcoming meeting between her boys does indeed happen and it goes smoothly…

“Besides,” she continues, keeping her tone light, “your party guests will be here any second. I’ll need you to entertain them while I finish preparing the snacks and your cake. You can’t be a good host if you’re constantly looking out that window.”

As soon as she says this, the doorbell rings and Haruka gasps. “That’s them! Lan, be a dear and greet them, I’ve still got much to do!”

“Okay…” Lan says and jumps off the couch to make his way to the front door. Opening it, he’s greeted by a handful of his classmates, Mayl Sakurai at the forefront as she beams at him and holds out a present wrapped in light blue paper.

“Happy birthday, Lan!” Mayl and the rest of the guests yell in unison. Lan gives them all a toothy grin as he waves them in. One by one they pass him, each giving him their own form of greeting.

Little Yai Ayanokoji struts pass him, the gift in her hands larger than her body as she politely acknowledges that he has a very nice home. Behind her comes Dex Oyama, who sticks his tongue out at his fellow 8-year-old. Lan reciprocates the action. He and Dex have known each other for forever, and while Lan considers him a friend, there are moments when Dex acts like a jerk. His ego only got worse when his father gave him a custom NetNavi named GustMan a few months ago. Since then, Dex has been insufferable and Lan has been waiting for the day he could finally show him who’s boss!

Speaking of NetNavis…

Once all the children are through the door, Lan steps out to look each way down the street. Nope… No Papa yet…

“Lan! Come back inside and entertain your guests!”

The child jumps, rushing back inside his house, “Coming Mama!”

-----------

Lan fidgets in his seat at the head of the table his mother set up during the time he and the rest of the children had been preoccupied with games in his backyard. At the time, he had hope that all the running around would take away all his anxious energy but, sadly, it hasn’t done any good. His father still hasn’t come home yet and he’s becoming increasingly restless. And while the snacks his mother made for the special occasion did help to distract him—his mother’s cooking always being excellent—now that his plate is empty, he’s aware of the pit that rests in his stomach.

Where is Papa?

He promised…

To his left is Mayl, who catches his eyes and gives him a concerned look. He responds to her with a half-smile, trying to give the impression he’s fine. It doesn’t really work, much to the boy’s dismay.

“What’s the matter?” she whispers, trying to be discreet. Thankfully, none of the other children notice them as they’re too consumed with the snacks and their own conversations.

“Nothing…” Lan initially lies, but then thinks better of it and confesses, “It’s just…Papa was supposed to be here by now.”

Mayl frowns. Trying to encourage her best friend, she says, “He’ll be here! He’s probably just late. Like you are when you come to school.”

Lan rolls his eyes at her minor jab at his punctuality (or lack thereof), but then reconsiders the possibility. His father always works a lot, even admitting at some points that he gets so sidetracked with one task, he forgets about another and needs to stay later than he initially planned. It wouldn’t be too farfetched to think something came up at work and it has caused him to be tardy…

It makes sense, but he wishes his Papa would just be here right now! It’s his birthday! He wants to spend it with everyone he loves…

Everyone…

Subconsciously, Lan raises a hand and rubs his chest. Mayl sees the action. “Are you alright?”

“Huh?” he asks, not realizing what he had done. Once he sees where his hand is placed, he lowers it, “Yeah…I do that sometimes. Mama calls it a nervous habit.”

He’s not sure why he does it, it just happens whenever he feels upset or lonely. There were even times that the action happens when he wasn’t feeling anything in particular. It’s almost like his heart is crying out for somebody…but for who he can’t say. His Papa he assumes, but he feels like there’s someone else… Like maybe there should be someone else who is supposed to—

“What are you two whispering about?” a voice interrupts his thoughts.

Lan and Mayl jump and turn their heads to see Dex eyeing them in suspicion on the other side of Lan at the table. Lan grimaces and takes his hand away from his chest. “Nothing, Dex!”

“Hey, that’s no way to talk to your party guest!”

“Lan was just saying he hopes his Papa comes home before it’s time for cake,” Mayl smoothly fibs, not just to keep Lan from embarrassment, but so a fight doesn’t break out between the two young rivals. Lan shoots her an appreciative glance before he decides to turn his head and view said cake.

“Oh yeah, that cake sure does look delicious!” Dex says, also turning his attention away from everyone to eye the sweet treat. “Lan’s Mama makes the best cakes!”

Lan nods, his mouth watering at the sight of the strawberry sponge cake. If there’s one thing he and Dex could agree on, it’s that nothing is better than Mama’s sponge cake! “She does!”

Suddenly, everyone hears the sound of the front door opening and footsteps walking through the threshold.

“I’m home!”

“Papa!” Lan screams, jumping from his chair and running to his father, his party guests forgotten in the midst of his excitement. “Papa’s home!”

Yuichiro laughs as his 8-year-old son practically slams into him. With a giftbox in one hand, he uses the other to carefully scoop the boy up. Lan giggles at the action and happily wraps his little arms around his father’s neck. Yuichiro happily returns the embrace.

As this happens, Haruka smiles, “Welcome home, Honey.”

“Hi, Dear!” the scientist greets his wife. To Lan he says, “And hello, Lan! Happy birthday, son!”

“Thanks, Papa!” Lan says. It’s then he spots the present in his father’s hand and starts to practically vibrate in excitement. “A present! You got me a present? Can I open it now? Please, please, please?”

Yuichiro laughs harder at the show of boundless energy, “Well aren’t you excited? I don’t see why not. Do you, Mama?”

Haruka sighs and puts her hands on her hips, “You know the rules, Lan. Cake first, then presents.”

Lan juts his bottom lip out, his demeanor deflating considerably, “Aww, but Mama!”

Her face goes stern for a quick second, ready to chastise her son, but then her eyes lock with her husband’s. For a very brief moment, they share what appears to be a silent conversation. Lan doesn’t quite pick up on it, though, as he’s surprised when he hears what his father says next.

“I think we can make an exception this one time, Haruka,” he says patiently. He then indicates the present to her, “After all, this gift is very special, wouldn’t you say?”

Still with his son in one arm, Yuichiro hands Haruka the present with the other. A small but soft smile forms on her face as she gazes at it. To Lan’s confusion, his Mama runs her fingers over it, almost lovingly. That’s weird… Why would she—?

Haruka sighs again, but this time in a wistful way, and then hands the gift to her son. Lan receives the package, not quite understanding what just happened. Has his Mama changed her mind? And why does it suddenly look like she might cry…?

“Your Papa is right,” she declares, any unshed tears she had now gone. “You should open this one first since it’s special. We can have the cake afterwards, and then you can open the rest of the gifts. Does that sound fair?”

The strange moment forgotten, Lan absolutely beams at his mother and goes to reach over to hug her, practically falling from his father’s arms in his haste. The parents laugh at his antics and work together to keep their son upright with a group embrace. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

“Haha, you’re welcome,” Mama says. “But you should open it at the table. You’ve kept your friends waiting long enough.”

Lan nods, “Okay!”

He rushes back to his chair, ignoring his classmates’ curious stares. They, too, are also excited to see what this “special” present could be. Lan’s so giddy to open a present his Papa got him, he doesn’t take the time to appreciate the wrapping. He instantly rips the bow and paper apart to get to the box. Setting it on the table, he places his hands on the lid and lifts it up; Mayl, Dex, Yai, and the rest of the children present watching in anticipation on what the contents of the box will be…

The birthday boy stares in awe at what he sees. A shiny new PET gleams back at him. With gentle hands he picks it up by the handle, taking all the details in as he runs his fingers over the covered screen, which he decides to open up. Gazing at the contents, he presses the button he knows will turn the PET on. He holds his breath as he waits, watching the screen come to life as the homepage features begin to set up.

It’s then that a small light appears, and after it dims, Lan is met by a figure in blue. His appearance seems to be older than Lan, but still childlike (maybe 11 or 12?). His jumpsuit is dark blue with cyan lines down the sides and yellow shoulder pads; the emblem in the middle of his chest adorning the Hikari family crest on it. On his hands and feet are gloves and boots in a lighter blue than the jumpsuit. On his head is a blue helmet with cyan ridges and yellow squares in the middle; the sides of the helmet being the same emblem as what’s on his chest.

His eyes open up and a bright green meets Lan’s brown ones. If he pays attention, the boy can see some kind of emotion swirling through them…but what emotion it is, he can’t say for sure. The Navi gives the child a soft smile before he speaks in a calm but confidant voice.

“Hello, my name is A.I. Navigation Program MegaMan.EXE. I’ll be your NetNavi. It’s nice to finally meet you, Lan! Happy birthday!”

There’s a small beat of silence as Lan takes it all in before he lets out an ecstatic squeal. His classmates and parents watch in amusement as the boy once again takes himself out of his chair and begins jumping around, holding the PET close to his chest. He feels an abundance of happiness right now, so much so, that the strange feeling in his chest he felt beforehand seems to have disappeared now that he has his new friend MegaMan!

“I knew it! I knew it!” he repeats, “I just knew Papa would get me a Navi. And look at you! You’re so cool!”

A blush appears on MegaMan’s face as he puts a hand behind his head in embarrassment. “Oh please, you flatter me…”

It’s then that the other children in the house get out of their chairs to gather around the birthday boy. They marvel at the PET, trying to get a glimpse at the Navi inside, all the while making their own comments:

“Oh, wow, he looks so cool!”

“He’s kind of small though, don’t you think?”

“But he’s cute!”

“Can I hold your PET, Lan?”

“If Lan’s Papa made him, maybe he’s super strong!”

MegaMan’s blush intensifies at the extra attention, suddenly feeling awkward. He had honestly expected to wake up just to his twin, not what seems to be the entire neighborhood—he isn’t prepared for such compliments and comments.

“What’s the big deal?” comes the sour remark from Dex. “He’s just a scrawny thing. There’s no way he could stand up to my GutsMan!”

Lan bristles, an intense feeling of offense taking over. No one talks about his new friend that way!

“You’re wrong!” he challenges, “MegaMan is going to be the strongest Navi ever! He’s gonna be way better than GutsMan!”

MegaMan, in shock by the boy’s action, holds up his arms in a form of placation, “W-Wait a minute now—”

“Oh yeah?” Dex retaliates, “We’ll see about that! You and me, Lan, we’re gonna NetBattle just to see who’s number one!”

“Bring it!” Lan says, his cocky attitude showing out.

“Lan, hold on, we don’t even have BattleChips!” MegaMan protests in vain. Of all the things to expect today, his new operator challenging the first person he saw isn’t on his list…

“Boys, calm down!” Haruka calls out, much to the blue Navi’s relief. “I don’t want any fighting in my house, especially not today. Now, everyone, get back into your seats! It’s time for cake!”

At the mention of cake, all the children cheer and rush back to their seats. Lan and Dex nod in understanding, their rivalry momentarily put on hold in favor of their appetites. “Yes ma’am!”

Once Lan is comfortable at his spot again, he carefully places MegaMan next to him where everyone could get a good look at his newly acquired NetNavi. He giggles as he watches MegaMan stare at all the faces before him in awe. “What do you think?”

The blue Navi jumps slightly and turns back to his operator, “W-Well, it’s kind of strange. All this is…different.” He’s not lying by saying that. He’s spent the last 7 years of his life confined in a lab with hardly anyone but his father for company (and before this life, it was confined to a hospital…). Seeing all the friendly faces around…it’s overwhelming, but not unwelcome at all.

He likes it.

Lan nods his head, “I think I get it. Don’t worry, you’ll get used to it! After all, we’re gonna be together for a long time, right?”

MegaMan blinks and his body relaxes, a genuine smile gracing his features. Yes, this is what he’s wanted for so long, to finally be able to be by his brother’s side. He’ll cherish it for as long as he’s able to.

This gift is just as much his as it is Lan's...

Almost on instinct, he presses a palm to the PET’s screen. “Of course, Lan. Together forever.”

Lan returns his smile and places his own hand on the screen, his boyish mirth practically palpable.

Their attention is suddenly brought to Mama, who comes back to the table with the anticipated birthday cake.

“Alright everyone!” Yuichiro says, his voice showing his delight at the events of the day, “Let’s sing to the birthday boy!”

Everyone around the table begins to sing as Haruka places the strawberry cake in front of her son. Lan grins toothily at the attention as MegaMan watches almost nostalgically. He turns his gaze over to the many faces once more, taking in their voices as they sing. Engrossed by the moment, he thinks that if he concentrates hard enough, he could pretend that everyone is singing happy birthday to the both of them…

But sadly, no one except his parents know that today is his birthday too…

Lan can’t even know… Not yet at least…

But maybe someday…

Not wanting to dwell on these feelings anymore, he schools his face into one of content and happiness. Meeting his twin’s gaze, MegaMan gives Lan a brilliant smile. “Happy birthday, Lan!”

Lan’s smile is just as bright as he replies, “Thanks, MegaMan! This is the best birthday ever!”

MegaMan can't help but agree.

“Happy birthday to you!”

[trans-queen-administrator]

oh i have been tagged in a thing. ty @yugonostalgia2019. time to overshare

3 ships: Hmmmm ok I gotta list Taylor x Lisa, their dynamic makes me go absolutely feral without fail. Honestly I don't even need them as a ship I just love how horrible and amazing they are for each other. I am limiting myself to one Worm ship here, despite how much it pains me, but I shall provide brief descriptions for the other ships for the people who don't know the non-worm stuff here. Marina x Pearl from Splatoon are so damn cute and I adore them. Nepotism baby punk soundcloud rapper x runaway genius former child soldier military engineer is honestly just 10/10, and they're just so good! I swear to god if the DLC doesn't have a 20 minute cutscene of lesbian cephalopod kissing I'll riot. Splatoon is my biggest fandom besides Worm which is kind of hilarious to me considering the sharp difference in tone. Third ship... hmmm, The Doctor x River Song. I just think it's genuinely such a sweet concept and wonderfully executed, two time travelers who are in love but keep meeting each other in the wrong order so their experiences and knowledge of the other don't match up is tragic and great and I nearly cried at their final episode. Honestly just been a River Song fan forever too, she's eternally my transition goals.

First ever ship: Ohhhhh gosh this one is lame. Back when I was a wee lass in middle school browsing FF.net endlessly, my main fandoms were Pokemon and Super Smash Bros. I flat out didn't realize that you could ship anything except a man and a woman because like, no one told me, and I kinda was just not a fan of romance because I thought it was always forced in stories (I was right about that tho). But then I read a Smash Bros fanfic that had Lucina and Palutena shipped and I was just like... damn, women can kiss? That sounds so cool. Shame I can never do that. And so I read the shockingly large number of fics shipping those two because it was the only wlw ship I knew existed.

Last song: I don't actually listen to music that much. Last song is uhhh... the Monster Sanctuary PVP Theme I guess due to playing Monster Sanctuary PVP. If we're talking actual music, I think my sister forced me to listen to some Taylor Swift song recently? Idk what it was but I think the album was called 1984.

Last movie: I also don't watch movies much! Uhhhhhhhhh I think it was Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No. Might have been a different one? The Sharknado movie that ends with them crashing down to Earth inside of a shark after fighting them off from a satellite and one of the characters gives birth while coming down inside the shark and the baby cuts its way out with a chainsaw before the mom gets crushed by falling debris. Sorry for spoiling, I know everyone was really looking forward to watching Sharknado 3.

Currently reading: Making my way through the Snapshots series of Splatoon fics which are so fucking good. For published stories though, Sir Gawain and the Green Knight for a class. Thinking about rereading Worm and posting about it but I gotta beat the Lakesbian copy allegations.

Currently watching: I'm don't really watch anything when I'm on my own, I prefer to read in almost all situations. When I go home though, I watch One Piece with my sister because it is nice to spend time with her and she's very passionate about the show.

Currently consuming: Nerds Gummy Clusters. I regret every bite but I bought this shitty bag of candy so I gotta finish it. Fuck these are terrible.

Currently craving: Mini Chewy Sweettarts. They're my favorite candy and I have a massive sweet tooth so I've been craving them, but I swear every single damn store in a mile radius stopped stocking them and is now selling "Sweettart gummies" or "Sweettart chewy fusions" or "Sweettart ropes" or "Sweettart rope bites" and that is not what I desire! Where is my delicious mouth hurting candy ;-;

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

Catharsis / FYI / Lesson Learned

Just know that when you see a non-Sydcarmy fic out there with a plot that includes codependency syndrome, a hotel chain poaching Carmy and taking him abroad, a happy ending, and Donna being a recovered alcoholic, which I have already mentioned time and time again on my blog that I think is gonna be her redemption arc (unless she dies), and that the main non Sydcarmy couple breaks up and gets back together when her codependency syndrome is under control, THAT PLOT IS ACTUALLY MINE (and a previous Sydcarmy plot about a trans person and a gay guy befriending Carmy in rehab, too, btw) bc I made the mistake of helping a writer with her fics. Ofc I have the receipts but I rather not use them, I’m not like that. I don’t expect credit bc after this writer used me, with my consent, she blocked me. It’s fine, I was clear from the get-go and I mention this all the time on my blog, that I only enjoy, write and read Sydcarmy content and she disagreed with that. I did make a small and occasional exception for her, though and I now regret it, and quite frankly that's the only thing I regret, even knowing the end result at this point. My bad.

Not that I owe ANYONE any explanation for my preferences as a writer, reader, fan, or viewer but I have my reasons for 💯 thinking that the best writing in this fandom can be found in Sydcarmy fics and that other pairs are usually extremely OC and are typically a bunch of dialogue lines thrown out there with no plot and a lot of smut (you guys know how much I dig smut, right?), which is not really my cup of tea but I fully support that it may be others'. I just happened to notice that it's not necessarily as complex as a concept to write about, bc in that case you don't have to worry about characterization or about what the creator/writer/director/EP really meant to say or tried to convey with their work, seeing as you completely disregard or bypass it and just keep the same names. I get it though: it’s easier and more practical to just write OC and pour down on the page all your sexual fantasies in the second person. I’m just not here for it and I am not sorry about it. And I’m unapologetic about this bc as I mentioned, to each their own, let's just be open about it.

This fandom is big enough not to have to cross paths and just be able to coexist peacefully, agreeing to disagree (if you are mature enough to handle that ofc). As long as the content is properly tagged and disclaimed, etc so we can all decide what to stay away from and what to dig in, making an informed decision, that is. Let's be clear: I don’t have to like ANYTHING, none of us have to be on the same page as to what fics we think are good or bad, which ones we love or which ones we fucking hate with a passion, but we all should act with integrity, here and offline. So that being said, I wasn’t treated that way and even though I feel used, I enabled it, so… karma, I guess. I was even stupid enough to send voice notes bc I was at work and then a few messages down the convo this person said: "I think I will have X do Y and Z...", which was exactly to the T what I had suggested AS PER HER INSISTENT REQUEST a few messages prior in my voice notes. So, I guess I had it coming...

While I have only been on Tumblr for like 5 minutes (2 months and 1/2), I have been quite active in other fandoms in the past, such as LTM and TXF, because I was born in the 80s, guys :) and nothing like this has ever happened to me before, I even had an account on FF.net where I did lots of collabs, and half the time I just donated my ideas bc I was too busy to actually write the fics myself and I was traveling all the time, so it was easier for me to let someone else write the stories, I have no issues sharing as long as everything is properly labeled. Everything was dreamy back then, I never had this kinda experiences before, and will take every precaution moving forward to never have them again, because it feels shitty and OC for me.

My points are:

1- Just FYI.

2- I don’t take this lightly #LessonLearned

3- Let’s agree to disagree in peace, please.

Thanks for reading.

XOXO

[seriouslysam8]

Hi Sam, what type of reviews do you prefer? To be honest I get anxious when leaving reviews because I don’t want it to be too long where I’m rambling or too short where it looks like I don’t appreciate the effort the author put into the chapters. Sometimes I get too excited and I go back and tone it down because I feel like I sound stupid. I’m the type of reader that as I’m reading I’m making bullet notes of what I liked or my reaction throughout the story, favorite lines etc.., and then I go back and expand on it. But then I read what I wrote and it’s almost a page of what sounds like complete gibberish to me so I deleted it and try to sum it up so it’s not as detailed but more to the point I guess… I’m ashamed to admit it but sometimes I don’t review because I think the author is going to think I’m a complete idiot and laugh at me. Sometimes I’ll only write down a few words as my appreciation and hold back the hundred of things I want to say or ask in fear of looking like an idiot.

I appreciate all and any positive reviews.

The only type of review I hate is when someone is critical or bashes my stories. There are a select few people who I allow to edit and preread portions of my stories that I trust to give me that critical feedback. But in reviews, I like to keep it positive and happy and motivating because I do this as a hobby and I don’t get paid. I don’t care if I’m long-winded or you hate x character or my angst is over the top. Click the x and move on. If you genuinely like the story, I’d love to hear about it!

But if you feel up to writing a few words, I’m happy. If you wanna write me an essay, I am REALLY fucking happy. You wanna ramble in a bullet point list, I’m giddy. You will never annoy me with rambling in a review or giving me your unfiltered reaction. Honestly, it’s the best feeling for me and makes writing out these stories worth it for me.

I share these stories because it’s fun to geek out about our favorite couple or character. I love the friends I’ve made through writing. I try to respond to every review (minus the anon ones on ff.net because I can’t? You anon reviewers who ask me question on ff.bet know I can’t respond right because I always feel bad but I legit can’t respond to you) because I like chatting with people about these characters.

And I know not every author feels like that. But I am a rambling mess all of the time and love to chat. So, please, don’t ever be afraid to leave a long review, a short review, whatever. Never edit your review with me. I will never laugh at you but we can share a laugh together about something stupid I wrote or about our lovable little vegetable patch. Don’t be afraid to send me asks with questions or whatnot. Don’t be afraid to send me a private message. I don’t care.

I get the anxiety. I’m a terrible reviewer. I never know what to say so I always leave short reviews. I’m socially awkward so I’m always afraid what people will think of my reviews because I know there are a lot of authors out there who feel the way I do about interactions, but I know there are a select few who don’t feel the way I do. So it’s always nerve wracking. I get it. But with me, you’re safe. Let’s ramble and have fun together, okay??? This is supposed to be a fun space. I’m fun. I think???

Please, put a name on your reviews even if you want to be anonymous. It’s way more fun to see the same names over and over again because then I feel like I start to get to know you through reviews and it’s just fucking fun. Like every week, I wait for the same names to pop up in my mailbox and smile when I get their review. Or I’ll be like “Ugh, So-And-So hasn’t read yet and I’m anxious what they will saaaaaaay!!” Like I get excited for the every chapter reviewers.

[jujywrites]

Invincible Summer

howhoops, I forgot to actually announce this on my fic blog *facepalm* For @holly-poly 2023, I got the opportunity and motivation to properly write out a plotbunny I've been keeping for at least 3 years. As sometimes happens, it turned out to be about 3 times as long as I had thought it would be, so I'll just link to my usuals and leave a preview here. Over 3k is my full-post limit here, even with Read More, lol.

Shout-out to the lovely folks of @polyamships for their support!

AO3

FF.net

and see a preview below~

***

A rather mousy girl chooses the seat next to her ten minutes before the first class begins; Mayu has been there for twenty minutes already as she doesn’t have much else to do on that day of the first week. She keeps skimming the textbook for this class.

“Hello,” the girl Mayu does not yet know says. “I’m Sohma Kana. Pleased to meet you.”

“Hello. Likewise.” The bare minimum she can say to avoid being rude.

“Are you planning to enter the medical field? I am; right now I’m a physiology major. I think I’d like to be a nurse, or maybe work in the lab and make discoveries, or maybe…”

Clearly, not looking at the girl makes no difference in whether she talks, so Mayu gives up on trying to read her textbook.

Sohma Kana’s face is somewhat flushed, as if she ran to class. Her eyes are hazel, bright and eager; her hair, unlike Mayu’s, is too fashionably short for a ponytail, landing at her chin. However, she wears a decorative hair clip featuring one of the Sanrio characters whose name escapes her.

Mayu notices two things quickly; Sohma-san stopped speaking, and she has an expectant look on her face. This leads to a third thing: Mayu blushing (and praying that Kana doesn’t see it, and blushing harder). Because Sohma-san asked a question, probably, and Mayu hadn’t heard anything because she had been too distracted, maybe even staring.

“Shiraki. Shiraki Mayuko. I’m not, this isn’t, it’s just an elective. I’m studying to be a teacher. A high school teacher,” she adds, the realization dawning.

“I see… This way you can have a backup career as a school nurse!” Sohma-san beams a smile, giggling freely. “Well, Mayu-chan— is it all right to call you Mayu-chan? You can call me Kana-chan— let’s make a study pact.”

“Study pact?” Mayu stammers, caught off guard by... Kana-san’s eagerness.

The girl smiles, undeterred. “Let’s support each other by sharing notes if one of us misses a class, cheering each other on, that sort of thing.”

Mayu much prefers to study alone and keep to herself (because in her skewed logic, that way only she will know if she screwed something up). She has a way of studying that isn’t meant to be disturbed, and—

Kana-san gazes at her, quietly earnest. “It can just be for this course, even if we have other classes together. I do hope we have more classes in common!”

Why does she feel like a goose being imprinted on by a cygnet? She laughs shortly. “We just met. You hardly know me.”

A cat-like grin steals over her face for a moment. “I have good instincts. You seem like an interesting, nice person, and I like you. Besides, if we do end up in other courses then I’ll learn more about you!”

Mayu feels warm everywhere, not just her face anymore; she shifts in her seat, scratching the back of her neck, and admits defeat. “All right.”

[fort-cozy-mcblanket]

Happy Shamy Anniversary! Can't believe it's been 13 years since Sheldon and Amy first met!

I had three ideas for my celebratory fic this year and by some miracle I ended up writing all three. One I posted on their wedding anniversary, one I posted yesterday, and this here is the third.

Thank you to my beta reader Stark and also Uri for reading this over! You guys are the best! And a special thank you to my friend Alejandra for answering my question of what's the most romantic equation. :)

This is also available on AO3 and FF.Net.

Please enjoy!

The first time she did it, it was on a whim.

Amy had an early-morning department meeting and was up and ready to go to work while Sheldon was still in the shower. Before she left, she opened the bathroom door to call out a goodbye, but then saw the steamed-up mirror above the sink and opted to leave her parting message there instead.

'Have a good day! Love you!' she scrawled with her finger before quickly retreating.

She wasn't sure why she did it exactly. There was just something about the idea of Sheldon stepping out of the shower, all naked and dripping, to see her little surprise note that tickled her. She drove all the way to Caltech with a smile on her face and then forgot about it for the rest of the day until she got home. The bathroom mirror was pristine by then and Sheldon never mentioned anything about it, but as she brushed her teeth in front of it that night she found herself smiling again, hoping he had liked it.

The second time she did it was just a few days later, that weekend. She got up early Sunday to meet her mother and aunt for breakfast and once again her departure time coincided with Sheldon's scheduled bathroom time.

'Have fun today! See you later!' she wrote this time, and drew a heart at the end for good measure.

When she returned that afternoon, the mirror was clean once again and Sheldon was out with the guys. She didn't think anything more of it.

The third time was on the following weekend. Amy was cleaning up from breakfast when Sheldon went to take his shower. While he was in there, Amy slipped in to write "Looking good!" in the mirror steam before slipping back out, grinning. She then settled on the bed with her iPad and waited for her turn to use the bathroom. A few minutes later the water turned off and Sheldon stepped out wearing just a towel, with a bottle of glass cleaner and microfiber cloth in hand.

"Here, since you insist on dirtying up our mirror, you can clean it this time," he said, foisting the cleaning items onto her.

"You didn't like my messages?" she asked, blinking up at him.

"It's bad enough the bathroom here isn't well-ventilated, the mirror is sure to corrode from all the condensation build-up. I would prefer not to think about all the germs and oils from your hands smeared on its surface too."

Amy sighed. Of course that's what he would think about, practicality over sentimentality. Of course she probably should have known that.

"You're upset?" Sheldon asked, surprising her.

"No," she said, but then paused. Sheldon wasn't good with reading emotions, but here he was making an effort. It didn't help either of them if she wasn't honest. "Well, maybe a little."

"Why?"

"I know it's silly," she explained. "But I guess I wanted us to be the type of couple who leaves little messages like that for each other. I thought it was romantic."

"Romantic? Smudgy mirrors are romantic now?" He threw up his hands. "Good lord, I'll never be able to keep up with all this nonsense!"

Despite herself, Amy couldn't stop from laughing a bit. Her poor, beleaguered boyfriend. He really did try to keep up with her romantic needs, she knew this. She could meet him halfway here, maybe find some other way to leave him love notes, maybe in his lunch.

"Okay, you're right," she said, standing up. "I'll clean up."

"Thank you!" he called after her as she strode into their bathroom and got to work.

----------

When Amy stepped out of the shower a few mornings later to see an equation written out in the mirror's fog, she was surprised. And annoyed. She quickly wrapped herself up in a towel and stomped out to find Sheldon.

"Oh, so I can't leave you notes on the mirror, but you can use it as an extra whiteboard for your work?" she asked.

"Didn't you read it?" he asked, looking up from where he was working on his laptop.

She opened her mouth, about to fire back that of course she read it, but actually she hadn't. Not really. She hadn't even put her glasses back on yet. She had only seen enough to know it was an equation, not words.

"Come on." Sheldon took her hand and led her back to the bathroom, passing her glasses over once they were both inside. She put them on and gave the message another look.

(∂ + m) ψ = 0

"The Dirac equation?"

"Oh good, you know it." Sheldon looked at her expectantly.

"Sure, the quantum entanglement of subatomic particles," she continued. Sheldon kept staring at her, his eyebrows raised, his head inclined toward her. She stared back.

"Good lord, you're going to make me actually say it!" he said after a few seconds passed. "Two microscopic particles can interact in a way that their quantum states become intertwined, so much so that the particles stay linked together even when a great distance comes between them."

"The initial interaction causes the two separate particles to become one system," she summed up for him, smiling. She saw it now. How two separate things can interact and affect each other in a profound and lasting way. How one could even cause the other to set aside the important principles of order and cleanliness in order to leave a love note on the bathroom mirror. "That's awfully sentimental of you, Dr. Cooper."

"Yes, well," Sheldon sighed and bent over to retrieve the bottle of glass cleaner from the cabinet next to the sink. "I blame the entanglement."