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Dead Dove December 2024
Hello everyone! This December I’m hosting a multi-fandom event that I’m calling, Dead Dove December! From 12/01/2024 - 12/31/2024 I’m encouraging others to create something that expresses their deepest and (most importantly) darkest desires. I will be reblogging all pieces of art or fanfiction, and will post a masterlist in January. or whenever i get around to it. i have not even done the pride masterlist bc I'm a disaster! But most importantly this will be for funsies.
I hosted this last year with just oscar/pedro Characters but Logan is my special guy so he's here now too <3
Details below the cut…
What is Dead Dove Do Not Eat?
Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, or DDDNE has its origins in one of my comfort shows!
The phrase comes from a meme referencing the 2003 Arrested Development episode "Top Banana", in which Michael Bluth opens a paper bag labeled "DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT" and, upon discovering that there is a dead dove inside the bag, says, deadpan, "I don't know what I expected." - fanlore.org
In short, what you see in the tags is what you should expect to see in the fic. This can apply for any type of fic, including the fluffy ones, but it’s usually associated with darker themes. That being said, this is your warning that this is a DARK THEMED EVENT. If you aren’t comfortable with darker topics like non-con, excessive violence, blood/gore, death, toxic relationships, 18+ age gaps, and more, then I encourage you not to participate in this event.
How to Participate
For the month of December, post your Dead Dove fanfiction or fan art on your blog. Use the tag #deaddovedecemeber2024 and tag me. You can also send a link via ask or DM if you like! I will not be posting anything for you, just reblogging and linking. At the end of December I will post a masterlist with links to everyone’s works! Side Note - Since Tumblr doesn’t really allow for NSFW art, you can post your work on Twitter or any other site that allows it and just send me that link so I can add it to the masterlist.
Rules
You MUST be 18+ to participate. I will be checking your blog/social media to be sure. Please make sure your age is easy to find. If I find that you’re a minor or if your age isn’t readily present I will be blocking you and you will be unable to participate. You can just add that you are over 18 if you don’t want your age out on the internet. As the creator and promotor of this event, I need to know I’m not interacting with minors given the nature of this event.
The work MUST be dark in some way. There’s no limit to how dark your work needs to be or can be, but it needs to contain some sort of dark theme in order to qualify. If non con isn’t your thing, dub con via stockholm syndrome or brainwash can let you write a more comfortable scene while still remaining dark. Fics and art do not necessarily need to be NSFW. last year a friend even did cnc, where it was seemingly dark but then ended with it was Marc and reader ding a scene. Dark reader or oc is an absolute yes.
Your work MUST have an Oscar Isaac, Hugh Jackman, or Pedro Pascal Character. It can be x reader, x oc,xcanon character, crosoversec. If you want Joel Miller fucking the ghoul from Fallout (or both of them fucking a reader)you can even though Eddie doesn't exist in any Oscar Pedro Hugh content. If you want Marc and Logan to fuck, go nuts. Got a series you're already writing, and wanna submit a dark chapter or a dark Au to it? That's fine too! We're pretty open here. No rpf.
Do NOT post anything before 12/01/2024. I will not count submissions prior to that date or after 12/31/2024. Masterlsit will be posted in January.
Your work MUST contain the proper tags. I won’t police how detailed your tags should be, but, for instance, if your work contains non-con, and you didn’t tag non-con then your work will not qualify. Please be inclusive in your writing where you can, but aware of POC queer and disabled people.
You may submit no more than two (2) pieces. This can include a fanfic and fanart, two fanfics or two fanarts. This is to allow someone to write a piece and make a work of art to accompany it. You can also work with another creator together.
I’m not going to yuck someone’s yum, but there are some things I’m just personally not comfortable with and since I’ll be reading/viewing/promoting all of these, I have a few things not allowed in the event. The list of what’s NOT allowed is shorter than the list of what IS allowed so here’s a list of the things that will NOT be tolerated in this event:
No underage/aged up minor content - To clarify, this includes things popular ships like - TLOU 1 or "Show Ellie" x Joel or Miguel O’Hara X Gwen Stacy. No "ageing up" minors for the purpose of a fic.
No Bestiality - To clarify, monsterfucking does NOT count as bestiality (at least to me). For example, werewolves, venom, Khonshu, e.t.c. are all allowed.
No Real person fanfiction. Can’t include Oscar, Pedro, or Hugh. This is not a moral judgement or me looking down just not in my comfort zone
No incest - To clarify, step-sibling/step-parent relationships are permitted as long as everyone is 18+. Different age of consent in your state or country does not apply here, and frankly I'd prefer 21+ but I know there are younger people than me who write so I'm not gonna say you gotta write like that. Selfcest relationships are also allowed (like Moon Knight or Miguel with his alternate self, e.t.c.).
No necro/snuff. Plain and simple.
I have final say in what I want to promote. Is TLOU 2 Ellie an adult and not technically Joel's ctual kid? Yes. technically it fits all the rules but it gives me the ick so I'm not gonna accept it. I cannot possibly prepare for all scenarios, and i want to just be able to have fun here with yall.
If you’re unsure if something is allowed or not, you can send me a DM or an ask for clarification prior to posting.
You can use any prompts you want or none, you aren’t tied to any one idea but here are some to get the ideas flowing if you need them!
Also, you can absolutely use a fic to inspire your art, or art to inspire a fic! Your inspiration piece, whether yours or someone else’s does not have to be from December, but you MUST obtain permission from the original creator before I promote your work. Most creators are happy when their work inspires others, and all my fics are open to being used for inspiration, but please reach out to the creator first.
I’m very excited! This is my second year hosting this an I've hosted other events by myself or with friends so I'm happy to keep going, this time with Hugh Jackman bc i can't get Logan out of my head.
Dividers and header made by the amazing @melodygatesauthor
Please consider reblogging to spread the word!
I don't reall know many people in the logan/hugh jackman fandom so I'd love if this was an oppritunity to get to know yall too!
Dark prompt list to come, also check out #deaddovedecember2023 to see what last year had!
#deaddovedecember2024#dead dove do not eat#dark joel miller#dark!joel#the last of us hbo#Logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#dddne#dark#dark fanfiction#oscar isaac#pedro pascal#joel miller#moon knight#tlou#jake lockley#triple frontier#dark content#dark!fic#non con#dub con#yandere#dark jake lockley#dark marc specter#dark steven grant#dark santiago garcia#dark francisco morales#dark pero tovar#dark smut#dark duke leto
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Dandelion News - November 8-14
Like these weekly compilations? Tip me at $kaybarr1735 or check out my Dandelion Doodles!
1. Agrivoltaics for sustainable food, energy and water management in East Africa
“[… C]ertain crops […] thrived under the partial shade provided by solar panels. The shade also helped to reduce water loss through evaporation, leading to more efficient water usage. Additionally, rainwater harvested from the panels could be used to supplement irrigation needs.”
2. The world’s largest wildlife crossing is now standing in California
“The structure crosses a 10-lane freeway and has been built to help protect all sorts of wildlife[….] And it’s not just for fauna: some 5,000 plants grown from seed collected within a five-mile radius have been nurtured in two specially created nurseries. The bridge will be topped with wildflowers, shrubs and native grasses that will also benefit insect populations.”
3. Judge rules the military must cover gender-affirming surgery for members' dependents
“[Judge] Torresen found that [gender-affirming] surgery is indeed medically necessary and that the Defense Department had not shown that any important governmental interest was advanced by denying the coverage.”
4. Social Media Can Boost Caracal Conservation
“The team found that searches on the species doubled after the project [using “social media to educate about the caracal”] launched. […] ”The research demonstrates how a public interest in urban ecology and the global phenomenon of ‘cats on the internet’… can be harnessed to leverage conservation action.””
5. US Labor Board Bans Captive Audience Meetings to Ensure 'Truly Free' Worker Choice
“[T]he National Labor Relations Board on Wednesday ruled that employers cannot force workers to attend anti-union speeches. [… W]orkers will no longer have to take part in so-called "captive audience meetings," which employers often use as a union-busting tool and a form of coercion.”
6. Study links grazing with plant phenology and abundance
“In general, plants where caribou or muskoxen were present experienced earlier green-up and greater abundance later in the growing season. “We're used to thinking of the timing of plant availability as impacting the productivity of grazing animals, but not the reverse," Post said.”
7. Frog populations once decimated by disease mount a major comeback
“"These results provide a rare example of how reintroduction of resistant individuals can allow the landscape-scale recovery of disease-impacted species, and have broad implications for amphibians and many other taxa that are threatened with extinction by novel pathogens."”
8. California Announces Special Session To Protect Trans People
“Newsom’s directive is clear: safeguard reproductive healthcare, support immigrants, and shield LGBTQ+ people from what is viewed as existential threats to civil rights and democratic norms. […] California has a unique opportunity to set the blueprint for other states in resisting a Trump administration[….]”
9. When ‘OK, Boomer’ Means ‘Let’s Go Protest’
“Youth activists across the country recognize the efforts of their eco-minded predecessors and welcome them as mentors, role models, and collaborators in their battle against the climate crisis. […] “The idea that Boomers don’t care, he said, is “just misinformation.””
10. How Aussie Waste Warriors are Redirecting Excess Food to Those in Need
“A growing movement is working to reduce perfectly good food going to waste by redirecting it to homes and charities. [… C]haritable organisations [… are] transforming fresh produce that would otherwise have gone to waste into millions of cooked, nutritious meals for people in need each year.”
November 1-7 news here | (all credit for images and written material can be found at the source linked; I don’t claim credit for anything but curating.)
#hopepunk#good news#nature#solar panels#solar power#agriculture#water conservation#wildlife#native plants#military#us military#gender affirming care#trans rights#big cats#workers rights#unionize#labor rights#muskox#caribou#frogs#reintroduction#conservation#california#gavin newsom#activism#solidarity#food#food waste#food insecurity#us politics
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– If you love me, then love me from the heart
tarot pick a pile reading ( → 1, 2, 3 )
pictures from pinterest → one, two, three
Slow down for a moment. Give your conscious mind a moment of rest, allow it to step back. Instead, listen to your subconscious mind, to that inner voice, to the intuition that is guiding you to the pile in which your message hides. A message about the love that your heart is longing for. The one that you are hoping to find…
This is our third reading from our divination jukebox, inspired by possibly one of the most beautiful songs that I've ever heard - "Yağmur Yağar Taş Üstüne" by Mustafa Güzel and Batuhan Fırat (feat. Belkıs Güzel). I'm so deeply grateful for the person that suggested this song and gave us the possibility not only to discover it, but also to have such a deep and tender message through this reading. It is difficult to find the correct translation for this song, but I strongly encourage you to listen and read it, as it is simply magical in the softest way. I will leave you the links that were recommended to me here, in case you would like to listen to it. And if you would like to see a pick a pile reading inspired by your favourite song, you can discover more about how to participate here↓♡!
♪♡♪ Divination Jukebox ♪♡♪
P.s. This is my first attempt at a longer reading, so if you feel comfortable please let me know in the comments what you think of it! If you prefer the shorter ones, if there is any aspect of the reading that makes it difficult for you to read it, or in case you will take a look at the extended version of this reading, if you would prefer to have something more specific in the additional messages of our readings - I will cherish your opinion and use it to get better with each post!♡
– Pile One,
{ The love that you are longing for }
the magician, the seven of swords, the page of coins
Love… you so often consider it just a feeling. A feeling that after all these years alive you still can really connect only to your own self. To you who seems to be the only one to feel it. To give it. While all that others do is receive it from you. Giving you back some gratitude perhaps, but never something that feels like what you gave them. Nothing that really fills in that part of you that was emptied for them… Making you really wonder if perhaps you got it wrong for all this time, if what you considered love never was it. If you imagined and expected it to be more, made it be more. Giving others much more than any person could ever give you in return, more than you ever should've done…
All that attention, that care, that genuine dedication that you put in, time after time, for every soul that was close, going out of your way to be there, right by their side for whatever might come… But still standing alone when facing your hardships, your difficult moments. Only you on the first line, out there in the cold, just you against this world… You genuinely never thought that this is what love would be. You expected something different from what you always received from others before. A complete opposite of having to do everything on your own, of that fear of what will happen to you if one day things in your life won't work anymore. You thought that it should be different from that because you know for sure that all those years of struggle alone never had even a bit of love in them, not from the people that were all that time around and close to you, but never did anything to help you, apart from telling you that this is how it works and that you should grow and take care of yourself on your own.
You alway imagined it, in those dark and painful nights, a hug, a caressing hand, a soft voice that assures you that everything will be okay, that it won't be forever this way, that you are not alone but you will always have them… So you did your best to be deserving, manifesting those tender and loving ways through your own self. Through the way you looked after others, the way you cared for them. Not only knowing that this is the right way to treat others, the way you genuinely want to be, but that it will be also worth it, that you will one day feel the love you gave, through others that will do the same… But it never came. You never saw your reflection in them, you never saw that part of your heart that you gave away being nourished and taken care of… it was always mostly just appreciated in the moment. And forgotten. Or worst, taken advantage of by expecting or asking more. So after all these tears, all the days dedicated to others instead of yourself, all your prayers for help and support, just a little comfort, that you never received because they are too busy to take a moment to give you back that love that you never declined them…. You started to think that you are in the wrong. That the love you always waited for is just a dream that the real concept of love can’t live up to. No matter how much you can look for it or want it. It is simply not something possible. And you are asking for too much.
{ What this is all for }
the judgement, the ace of swords, the lovers
This world, this life in general… has a really unique way of helping us to learn, of guiding us in or through the right direction and path, of letting us know that everything will be alright… Their language is so different from ours that we really struggle to understand it, those words that come in the form of pure feelings directly from within us. The ones that we should trust the most but never do so. Especially when it comes to love, something that we so much idealise, something that we have so much desire for.
Your heart is so sincerely tired, it went through so many betrayals and wounds inflicted by those that you tried to love. To the point that it simply feels that heaviness, that weight of this experience that you never really wanted to begin with. So you feel like you are ready for something else, for that love that you did all of this for, if it even exists at all. But are you really sure of it..? Of knowing so well the person that you would like to have by your side each day, their character, their behaviour, their values? Are you sure that you really did look for them and not just anyone who seemed to be able to love? Are you sure that you really know your worth and the one of your love, how one must love you in order to really give you all that your heart needs and wants? Or did you think that you knew it before, and now you are settling for much less than you are deserving of, because of the overwhelming loneliness and fear that it will be this way for the rest of your days unless you accept whatever one gives you in return? Are you sure that you are remaining loyal to your own self and your soul, instead of trying to “sell” it to whoever is close and good enough?
Because, even though perhaps you are not doing it consciously, but you are changing. Little by little. Not in terms of who you are, but in the ones of who you allow others to consider you. Leaving it up to them to decide how much you deserve, what is the worth of your love and care that you give them after letting them in, where only the most sincere, genuine and trustworthy should belong. You just give them your all. Every single time. Without any limit or hesitation. Not even when all that you receive is another rude phrase, some judgement, coldness and distance once they got up and healed thanks to your love. You just do it. For everyone. Not choosing carefully, but treating every soul as the right one. And not in a good sense. Instead, you are not listening anymore to your own intuition or feelings, not trusting your own mind that recognises the things that are too off. You are just rushing in this hunt for “the one” as the time passes and you feel more and more scared and alone. You are throwing yourself at every possible connection, all in, wandering each time that it goes wrong what you did too little or too much of. And not realising anymore that it is not about how you love, if it is in the right way or the wrong one… But rather who you choose, even force yourself, to love. And how they are simply not the right one, no matter how much you sacrifice of your own values and preferences, just to make them fit in the place that it is not theirs to hold.
All these bad endings, failures, mistakes that you consider yours to be responsible for… Are just a natural consequence of you settling for less than you really desire and need in order to feel loved. All that sadness, that loneliness… are only your subconscious, your own heart that you willingly ignored at first, but that after some time managed to be heard by you, letting you know that the way you are treated, the crumbs that you accept, will never truly be enough.
Those endings, those coincidences that are never in your favour, those interferences in your connections from the outside world… are just its efforts to protect you and communicate with you, trying to show you that refusing your own standards is not what can help you find them, that right person that you can truly feel safe and understood with… Adapting to another person and changing, it is not what will make them love you like you want. It will only keep you stuck in a play pretend. Put you in situations and relationships that you won’t feel appreciated and cherished in. It will consume you from inside out, slowly but surely, just because that one time you believed more others, than your own self that always knew what was best and right for you, what you really wanted to feel and who you wanted to have with you…
The time already passed, you already got through so much. You can’t do anything about it, and it is alright. But you can do yourself a favour and listen again to your own heart, before following that overwhelming fear and anxiety of being left alone in the cold and the dark. Your heart, your love, they are unique. But not at all the only ones. There is a soul, out there, that is your perfect reflection, someone who resonates so much with your ways of feeling love. And you can and will find them. The moment you stop seeing all that happened and you went through as the mistakes you made, ways that you can be better by being more or less… And start to see them as simply were and when the things didn't feel right for your heart, for who you are. Because those things that you felt the lack of, or perhaps as though it is just too much, are the ones that you need to hold onto, to look for in others. Instead of ignoring them, just so you can fit in the perfect version of love of someone and they can accept you, even though you are not theirs to love…
Although it seems so easy to do through words… We know too well that sometimes it is not enough to just choose to listen to our heart more. It is not always enough when we, in a certain way, forget its language, when we are not able anymore to comprehend it and separate it from the voice of our mind that we learned to follow… For this reason, there is an additional message for you, if you want to, in our extended version of this reading. What you need to know and remember as you continue on this journey, in this search of the right person for you, but also of the confidence and trust in your own heart, that will be the things that will change everything about the situation in which you are now.♡↓
{ a little message for you }
—
– Pile Two,
{ The love that you are longing for }
the wheel of fortune, the sun, the devil
It happened so many times… So often you felt overwhelmed, completely overtaken, by the life of someone you loved… Their problems, their difficulties, their fears that became yours. Yours to resolve, yours to take care of, yours to endure, even though you never could really influence them, not the things that depended on their actions, their decisions. Not when it was something that was purely theirs to create, destroy and live… It happened so many times, truly. You felt so often the urge to be there for someone, just because you knew them, just because you saw their struggle and couldn't help but to try to save them. Because this is what everyone deserves, yes… But with those that had a special place in your heart, those that you felt so close to you, so needed as the air you breathe, there never was a chance for you to say no. Not when your heart so ardently fought for them each day, no matter if it was your battle, your victory to take or not.
One by one they took a part of your life from you, gladly accepting your love, your support and help. And leaving it all to you, to your heart and mind that never were supposed to live so many lives, go through so many situations and emotions, bear so many consequences that were coming from actions that simply weren't yours. And they took it from you. That time and energy, the courage and strength that otherwise would have gone to you, to your own healing, growth and protection. They took it all from you and, worst of all, they were able to do so thanks to you. You who gave it to them, all that you had, in the name of the love that you felt. You that not even once regretted it. Not in the moment at least…
They took so much from you, making you get used to it, to have so little, to give away so much… That now, for once, you want to find someone different. Someone who will not take advantage of your heart. Someone who will understand that, no matter how much you want and try, it is not the right thing to leave it all up to you, to handle their life… Someone who, for once, just knows more, knows better. Someone who can teach you, gently, softly, as they protect you from your own self, from your own urge to disintegrate yourself for the happiness and safety of someone else.
For once… you want to be overwhelmed by someone's joy, their hope, their desire to be here and to live this life. Their strength to choose to see the best aspects of the things. Their strength to be patient, to have faith, to believe that everything will work out in the end. For once you want to receive that strength, not to give it away. For once you want to be protected, guided, as you trust someone who doesn't expect you to lead the way out of the darkness of their days…
It might sound selfish to some, so entitled to look for someone who has it all figured out, who has better and more control of their life… But you are simply tired. And a little lost, if one can say the truth. Tired of figuring everything out constantly, keeping others above the water, as they push you down, never thinking of the air they are taking away from you. It’s not about an easier life, about receiving constant help or guidance, leaving it up to others to make the choice for you… It is about just wanting to have something that is left for your own self too. A little time, a little love, that you can give yourself without being afraid that in the meantime someone would get upset or hurt. You just want to be able to take care of yourself too, not only of those that you love, of your connections, of your situations, that seem to be destroyed each moment you are not looking after them. You just want to have someone that is by your side, living their life, instead of living yours that becomes so scarily about them, their necessities, their dreams, their worry and losses. You just want someone to learn from, or together, how to live this life in the most right and healthy, loving way. Not to teach it. While you yourself don't have any idea of how you are still here, how you made it until now every day.
{ Will you ever find someone like them }
the justice, the eight of wands, the queen of wands
This new and almost desperate desire in your heart now, might feel a lot like frustration, the last realisation of how things should've been when everything already happened, when it is too late to change them… But instead of a tragic end, it is more of a hopeful and promising beginning. The one that you are creating with your each thought, with each moment of understanding of what it is that you really want to feel, when sharing your love. The taste of it, the feeling, the emotions it can give you. With each found answer in your heart you are changing your life, much more than you expect now. Because it really is all about your choices. Your decision of who you will be accepting into your life from now on.
There is a part of you that is growing, getting stronger, preparing to be vigilant and serious about its duty: the one to protect your heart. One little thought created by the tiredness, the sadness of all that you endured… was enough to move the waves of the whole world, of the reality around you. Of who will be brought right to you, and who will be pulled back, not being the right ones. Changing your connections one step, one person at a time. Giving you back the right to decide for yourself, making you remember that you can in fact do it, you can choose the ones dear to your heart.
And it won’t be delusion, entitlement, selfishness, or any sort of limit that you will put on your heart… It will be just you, all grown up, who will now know that it is okay to not take it all on yourself, whatever and whoever comes, because of the fear of what not doing it will cause. It will be your understanding that people can and will make it through on their own, even if they are so afraid or feel incapable of facing their life right now. And it will be also your acceptance that not every story you hear is yours to live, to feel, to make sure it has a good ending. Not everyone is yours to protect and help. Not everyone has the right to come before your own self.
It might be a change that will take its time to settle in, especially in your heart that is just so full of love. Love that you didn't give yourself for so long, pouring it all in the needing hands of those by your side. But it will happen. It will feel safe and right, to allow yourself to choose how much the realities of others influence your life. And as you will go through it, as you will seek that courage and strength… It will be enough to remember that everything will be okay. Even in those moments of uncertainty, it will be enough to hold on tight to the message that we will receive, if you want to, in the extended version of this reading. A message about how you can and will change your life.♡↓
{ a little message for you }
—
– Pile Three,
{ The love that you are longing for }
the ten of wands, the star, the death
It is so difficult to need to explain yourself, your actions, your urges, your reactions. It is tiring to open up your mind and your heart sharing them with others, again and again. Just for them to not understand it, to not pay the slightest of attention, to not take it seriously, all those things that are still consuming your soul… It just feels so useless to go through it, to come out of your comfort zone so hopeful that they would be that right person… only to see them walk away, who scared, who uncomfortable, who deluded or bored. Leaving you feeling like a poor seller who is unable to demonstrate the worth of your broken, lived, soul. When you don't even want to do it in the first place. When it is so ridiculous that you need constantly and so fiercely to defend or explain your wounds, as if they didn't already hurt enough.
It just consumes you. Consumes your every desire to go out there, interact and try to connect with people, creating with such dedication a relationship that - you know it too well - will just be destroyed. By your own past, your own frail soul that is too difficult for others to manage, to use or control. Too delicate to do anything with it without hurting it more.
Deep down you know that not every single person you met was truly so evil at their core. But it still hurts you like hell, being rejected, just put aside, simply because of the way you feel so strongly and deeply every detail about this world. Just because you have more depth to your feelings, more power to the emotions that simply overwhelm you, good or bad, every single bit of them that fills you whole. And that you welcome and feel completely, still remembering how cold and dark it was when there weren't any emotions in you at all.
It just would've been much easier, for once, to not have the need to defend yourself, the way you became. If for once the one in front of you focused on who you are now, and not on who you were or who you could become if only you suppress your soul. Because you changed, yes, and it might be sad to not have that spark that others adored so much about you anymore. But the you who survived still and always deserves the same admiration and love, perhaps even more, after all that you were able to endure. This you who is so different is still you. The you who gave you the strength and courage to face it all. The you who shouldn't at all be forced to explain yourself to those that can't even do one thing: just listen to you, hear you truly, at least for once.
Because it is not so difficult, in the end, to just accept someone and love them for the way they are, without any if or but. You know it well, because you always did it and always do with everyone that is close to you. But while they can be themselves, knowing that they will be truly safe with you, their every wound that will be taken care of without any judgement or expectation to receive something in return… You are always asked to be less or more. To hide your pain, to be more joyful. To not react too much to the things that hurt you. To, instead, be more understanding and patient, accepting, of the ways of others. Even though they never tolerate yours.
So you remain here, among so many of them but still feeling so lonely, so trapped, exactly like it used to feel before. You still are being hurt, even though you had so much courage in not hiding yourself, your scars. Even though you learned to have the needed strength to stand your ground when others didn't see that they were stepping on your heart… And you still hope. That one day, somewhere and someone, for once will just feel drawn to you. Not a memory of you or your potential change. Just someone who, for once, is gentle and kind in their ways. Not because you asked them to, not because they were forced by your tears… But just because they are connected enough to their own heart. Enough to recognise the painfully familiar stories behind your tired and scared eyes. Just one person, just one single time would be enough. Just one single moment in which you would feel loved and cherished the way you are, even with all those fears and doubts that everyone has always something to say about. Just one true and genuine connection. One single chance for your heart to find again the hope that you, exactly the way you are now after all your battles, not less not more, will be enough.
{ You are not in the wrong }
the page of coins, the strength, the six of cups
Finally standing up for yourself, taking your defence, pushing back those that don't make you anymore feel safe… it took a lot of courage, especially when every decision that was already hard enough was also met with judgement, with pure rage, just because for once you weren't ready to be there for someone else. But while you thought that the worst part will be this, finding the strength to prioritise yourself, the most difficult part revealed itself to be resisting the urge to take all your words back, bowing your head, surrendering to discourses of others about how you shouldn't ever do that again, and coming back to your old and consumed self, asking it to endure it once again. But this time with the full awareness of how it is wrong, to give away so much of you, remaining with so little that it is never enough to take care of your own heart and mind…
You are resisting it now with all your strength, but the single thought that they might be right, that you are indeed acting too selfishly, is already enough to shake you to your core, to fill you with the pure terror that you might be becoming one of those that hurt you, coming down to their level without realising what you've done.
But you are not. I promise you. There is nothing wrong in putting yourself first for once. There are no mistakes when you are acting from your heart, from the pure desire to protect yourself now that you are realising that it all just has been too much. You are not the villain here, even if perhaps there isn't one among them either. There is no evil in knowing what you deserve and want, and not accepting nothing less from others, even if they so perfectly mask it with words like “It is the way I love”, “This is the best for you, the best you can ever find or hope for”...
You���ve endured a lot, so much that it is truly non conceivable and admissible that someone belittles it. That someone doesn't give it the importance and incredibly powerful and heart wrenching meaning that you surviving all of that holds. Don't stop for them, for their fears that you will change. Because it has already happened, in the good and in the bad. And if someone can't accept and respect the new you, if they, even in the name of their love, can't accept you… then it is okay. There will be someone else. Someone else who will meet you, get to know you, and learn to appreciate and cherish you for the way you are now, not a memory of who you were.
It might be sad to let go of some people, to lose some connections. It might be frustrating to see their absolute conviction that you are the one in the wrong… But you are tired now, you feel weak after needing to fight against them again and again just to protect yourself… so don't waste your last remaining energy on them, on proving them wrong when they already ended this story as it is more convenient for them in their head. Let them go. Let them be. Not to allow them to think that they are right. But for your own self and to give you that space and time to rest and recover, to take care of yourself.
This world is vast, there are so many of us. Remaining now for a moment alone… doesn't at all condemn you to have all the days of your life lonely and cold. It is just a phase, just a precious moment that will sign a new step in your growth, in how much you consider your own worth and protect yourself at all costs. People come and go. Some are good and some are not. But you are unique, you are the only one you have, the most important person that you need to love and take care of. Even if it means to not accept the love of others, simply because it is so different from what you are longing for. Even if it means to reject the company that you so much want, because they never offer it genuinely but only when it is so convenient and needed for them.
Times will change, you'll start new journeys, go through different paths that will align with others, new and completely different persons. And you'll create new connections, better ones. Better because of the ways and motives of those that will come closer. Better because you will be much more rested, healed and confident after this focus on yourself and this pause. Better because there won't be any play pretend, endurance or feelings that will be ignored. It will be better. Simply because you will learn from your mistakes, you will grow. And so will those that you will let go of, but not at your own expense and endurance of the way your heart hurts for them. Because they might not realise it now, they might be so convinced that you are the one hurting them… but you are making the best decision not only for your own self, but even for them. You are giving all of you a new chance. A chance that you for sure will take and use it to nourish a new beginning in your life, new connections that will love you, cherish you, protect you at all costs. Exactly like it should be between truly loving souls.
And if it feels still a little too overwhelming, a little too scary and unsure, the decision to put yourself first… There is a little message about the future, at what it holds, in our extended version of this reading, right here, if you want or feel the need to hear more.♡↓
{ a little message for you }
—
_
#thatfrailsoul#thatfrailsoul: pick a pile readings#thatfrailsoul: divination jukebox#tarot reading#tarot#divination#pick a pile reading#pac reading#love tarot reading#connection reading#spirituality#awareness#self reflection#answers#tarot cards#oracle#tarot tumblr#tarot community#tarot blog#channeled reading#message for you#channeled song#favorite songs#song suggestions#song recommendation#tarot game#tarot message#personal journey#inner self#self love
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°•*⁀➷ Introduction °•*⁀➷
TRIGGERING BLOG: BLOCK DONT REPORT
cws for my blog: ed, weed, alcohol, and nicotine use, occasional sh and suicidal thoughts/talks about attempts, occasional mentions of abuse/trauma, religious trauma, pet/family death, medicine misuse, and overdoses
please tag any posts about christianity/god with "tw christianity" and any sh posts with either "tw sh" or "tw sh implied"
links proof-checked by my awesome moot @/atlasisneverenoughx
°•*⁀➷ About Me °•*⁀➷
Name: Vivian
Age: 16 (17 next month) im ok with adults interacting just don't be weird yk? id prefer followers/moots aged 15-22 but i'm ok with people older or younger following, i just may not interact as much (unless were already moots)
Gender/Pronouns/Sexuality: im gender apathetic/non-binary, i could care less about my gender or how i'm perceived. i use all pronouns but when asked i just say they/them or they/xem if we're close. (moots are allowed to use xey/xem for me freely btw and i encourage it!! :3) i'm aroace and pan (more specifically i rarely get crushes on people but still find some people attractive regardless of gender and i'm a sex repulsed asexual)
Diagnoses: depression, anxiety, and derealization (depersonalization is not diagnosed however im aware i deal with it and need to bring it up next session) my therapist is trying to diagnose me with ptsd and my mom wants me to get diagnosed with anorexia
Be Aware: i don't censor most things but i will tag everything i post according to what's mentioned. Another thing; i block freely and often so i apologize if you end up blocked
DNI: basic dni stuff (racist, homophobic, sexist, etc) generally bad people, NSFW/18+ blogs, anyone under 13 and men over 23 (unless we're already moots)
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If i reblog something that has misinformation or something that's accidentally offensive, pleaseee let me know so i can take it down, i don't always double check like i should
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°•*⁀➷•* Stats °•*⁀➷•*
Height: 166cm
HW/SW: 136.6lbs
HBMI/SBMI: 25
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LBMI: 16.2
CW: ~113lbs
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°•*⁀➷•* Goals °•*⁀➷•*
GW1: 110lbs
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°•*⁀➷ Tag Guide °•*⁀➷
There's a lot and most are self explanatory but in case you were wondering here's all of them :3
#gvtz- all my posts/reblogs
#gvtz life- talking about what's going on in my life, reblogging things i relate to
#gvtz rants/vents/rambles- my posts where i rant/vent/ramble and talk too much or let my mind wander while typing
#gvtz eats- wieiad
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#gvtz#gvtz life#gvtz rants#gvtz vents#gvtz rambles#gvtz eats#gvtz cooks#gvtz works out#gvtz asks#gvtz moots#gvtz will eat#gvtz 👙#gvtz 🍽️#gvtz diets#gvtz 🤢#gvtz music#gvtz wants to eat :((#gvtz advice#gvtz is unstable#gvtz is productive??#ed but not ed sheeran#tw ana bløg#pro for ana#tw ed ana#ana loves you#tw ana mia#ana y mia#tw ed implied#tw ana rant#tw ed disorder
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9-1-1 & healthy male friendships (+buddie):
Today I saw a comment on a buddie tiktok saying “why does it have to be queer, why can’t it just be a healthy supportive male friendship?’And that’s a viewpoint that I think is very important and relevant to the show, just not Buddie. Let me explain...
Healthy male friendships in television are often poorly written. It’s so important that we see good examples of two male characters able to be affectionate, open and vulnerable with eachother without implying there’s some romantic/sexual undertones.
Its a damaging stereotype to liken men sharing and being open with their feelings to being homosexual as it perpetuates stereotypes of gay men being “too emotional” or “too weak” etc
BUT that being said, I’m trying looking at this from more of a show writing perspective than a shippers perspective.
Without buck and Eddie 9-1-1 still has an ensemble with some beautiful male friendships. I think Bobby and Michael are my favourite example, where they have no romantic or sexual chemistry whatsoever and yet share some deeply meaningful and open moments. I think about the moment where chimney admits to Bobby that he remembers the whole rebar incident but that he feels unable to talk about it. Chim and Albert’s brother arc where they learn to connect with eachother is stunning!
Buck and Eddie also have wonderful friendships with other members of the show too. Buck and chimney are the most supportive brother in law duo you ever did see. The moment I think of the most is when, after the Jonah storyline, Eddie takes the time to check in with Bobby and prevents his alcoholic relapse. That, to me, is a prime example of deeply meaningful, yet platonic male friendship.
9-1-1 is already showing the healthy male relationships… and it’s VERY different to what they show between buck and Eddie.
Buck is not just emotionally open to Eddie, he’s a second father to Chris. Buck doesn’t just hang out, he’s “not really a guest” in Eddie’s home. I could go on…
Eddie is so emotionally constipated that it’s actually a tough watch sometimes BUT he lets buck in sometimes. He doesn’t really allow himself to be weak around any characters cause he’s got crippling toxic masculinity but buck is the exception!! That really says a lot to me about their relationship.
I’m not going to get into the Tommy love triangle fiasco cause that was just like… there’s no hetero explanation for that. There’s also so much more I could say about why a lot of Eddie’s poor treatment of women seems to be linked to internalised homophobia that stems from his upbringing cause that’a a topic for another post.
My point was to highlight that it literally doesn’t make sense anymore from a writing standpoint for them to just be friends and we don’t NEED them to stay friends either. We have enough other healthy male friendships already in the show that are the perfect example of men being vulnerable and open. LET THEM BE GAYYYYYYY
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Pulp Musicals Tumblr Dashboard Simulator
☀️new-york-sun-official Follow
GREAT ASTRONOMICAL DISCOVERIES, LATELY MADE BY SIR JOHN HERSCHEL AT THE CAPE OF GOOD HOPE: LIFE SPOTTED ON THE MOON! CLICK HERE TO READ THE FULL STORY
👨💼the-real-john-hershey Follow
What the hell no I didn't
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Nuh-uh
👨💼the-real-john-hershey Follow
YUH-HUH
☀️new-york-sun-official Follow
NUH-UH
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YUH-HUH
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BREAKING: Sir John Herschel breaks down on Tumblr account! Has the stress of being a world famous astronomer finally got to him? Click here to read the full story
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I-
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@youngmanwithapencil why is your story on the official sun account take it down immediately
✍️youngmanwithapencil Follow
Alright but it's getting you a lot of clout tho
💸owner-of-the-ny-sun Follow
Okay nvm
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Hot take: I hate America. I hate American culture. I hate American people. All American people. Especially that no good, very bad, idiotic American woman
✨️anna-hanova Follow
....Charles, is this about me?
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ugh I need him so bad
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OH SHIT WRONG BLOG
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STOP
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Great Astronomical Discoveries Heritage Post
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IMPORTANT UPDATE:
Sorry about that you guys. Account got hacked. Don't click mysterious links sent to you by strangers. Stay safe out there. Everything is a-okay.
-Mod AJ
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Oh, soooo happy to see you're okay, Captain!
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Fuck you.
💝stars-herschel Follow
Sure thing!
Stargazing- John Herschel x Reader
Keep Reading
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DNI if you call The Blazing World Chazira. Like seriously if you do that you support a literal dictatorship and mind control.
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The Blazing World is the only thing you're allowed to deadname.
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Does anyone feel... oddly complete, by this news?
I've always felt like something was missing in life. So I would stare at the moon for answers, searching for something. And I got it. I finally found it.
I finally feel like I have something. Something to hold onto, to know, to cherish.
Thank you, @youngmanwithapencil and @rose-starford. You have no idea how much this means to me.
✍️youngmanwithapencil Follow
oh shit
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#pulp musicals#the searcher in the shadows#the great moon hoax#the brick satellite#the ghosts of antikythera#john herschel#chester thomas#Samuel Stratford#Charles t Coram#Anna Hanover#rose Stratford#destiel news#captain aj griffin#aj griffin#Kal pulp musicals#dakkar pulp musicals#sia pulp musicals#Margaret Cavendish
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Yet More Trumpist Humiliation of the ADL
I really don't intend for my post-election coverage to be so ADL-centric. But I can't help but be struck at the degree to which Trump's Jewish and Israel-related decision-making might as well be solely based on how to personally humiliate the ADL, and prompt them into embarrassing and degrading acts of submission and hypocrisy, to the greatest extent possible. For example, Trump's announced pick for UN Ambassador is New York congresswoman Elise Stefanik. One of my basic rules of 2024 political observation was that "one does not, under any circumstances, have to hand it to Elise Stefanik," who defined the term bad-faith grandstanding when it came to her supposed objections to campus antisemitism even as she was directly promoting dangerous antisemitic conspiracy theories on her own. But alas, the ADL eagerly jumped in with praise for the selection, allowing us to juxtapose this: next to this: Like I said -- just abject, humiliating supplication. It couldn't be more pathetic. Or consider the position of United States Ambassador to Israel. If ever past was prologue, this is it. The first time Donald Trump was elected, he appointed an ambassador to Israel who referred to liberal Jews as "kapos". The ADL maintained a studious silence, a choice which I maintained "sold out" a substantial swath of the Jewish community that it purportedly was tasked to protect. This time around, the nominee is going to be former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee, who has an even more illustrative history with the ADL. You see, back in 2011, the following sequence occurred: Huckabee made spurious and offensive analogies to the Holocaust (comparing it to, of all things, the national debt). The ADL publicly took exception. Huckabee threatened the ADL. The ADL scampered backwards and issued a groveling apology. So here, at least, the ADL already got ahead of schedule, and I look forward to some embarrassingly effusive praise directed towards Huckabee to emerge forthwith. What we saw in 2016, is only going to be worse in 2024. That's true on many levels, but for the ADL in particular it is evidently apparent -- they will sell us out. They will take vulnerable American Jews, who are rightfully terrified about emergent Christian nationalism and White supremacy and violent extremism and, yes, left-wing campus antisemitism too*, and they will leave us to twist. They will do it regularly, and repeatedly, and without hesitation, and for an embarrassingly cheap payoff. * I include this because, by cuddling up to the far-right powers that be, the ADL will necessarily kneecap any ability to effectively fight campus antisemitism, though they certainly will retain the capacity to yell about it. The sorts of tactics which actually might tamp down on and respond to campus antisemitism, versus the sorts of tactics which yield good Fox News ragebait and can justify blowing up the Department of Education, are not compatible with one another, and the ADL is going to lash itself to the latter at the expense of the former. While there still may be utility in what the ADL can do for someone like me on the local level, in terms of a cohesive, national strategy I do not have any more confidence in the ADL's ability to effectively protect me from campus antisemitism than I have confidence in its ability to protect me from conservative antisemitism. via The Debate Link https://ift.tt/VHakqpj
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Okay but it's super interesting how
Din = Power = Ganondorf
Naryu = Wisdom = Zelda
Farore = Courage = Link.
Because Din, in the hylian creation myth, created the physical world. Naryu then created the laws - gravity, time, etc. And Farore finally created life - plants and people.
Din created the body, naryu the mind, Farore the soul.
And the triforce and its wielders so perfectly reflect that.
Ganon is physical power, he is big and intimidating and he breaks things. He is cunning and determined, but that's not what he focuses on. He is might makes right.
Zelda is wisdom and cleverness. She is stall tactics and information and team work. She is a powerful mage with a spine of steel, but that's not how she'll win. She is the pen being mightier than the sword.
Link is courage and persistence. He is the wild card sneaking behind enemy ranks, always moving, plunging into terrifying situations head first. He's a phenomenal fighter with a keen wit, but that's not what will get him through his challenges. He is bravery not being the absence of fear but the triumph over it.
They sit in perfect parallels to each other.
And ganon is reborn through his body - his resurrection is immortality. No matter how low he is cast, as long as he has a body he can claw his way back. He can cling to his power, build it ever higher.
Zelda is reborn through the magic of her bloodline. It's the accumulated knowledge handed down for generations, the unique power she must master, the skills she must develop to survive and get her kingdom out the other side intact. Even her name, the knowledge of herself, is handed down from all the way from the very first. Her ancestors knowledge of her future presence, her stability, is what gives her the edge.
Link is reborn in spirit. He is not bound by flesh or blood. Just like his wanderlust soul he can reappear in any time or place. His variation, his unpredictability, is exactly how he fights. It's what makes him so hard to pin down.
Ganons need to build strength means he can't chase after link. Links impulsiveness means zelda can outwit him. Zeldas stationary predictability means she's an easy target for ganon.
But the other direction?
Fire melts ice, ice redirects lightning, lightning burns fire.
And that's the very essence of the triforce.
#It's little details spread across the games like this that just makes it work so WELL it's SO COOL#They're all great at all parts of the triforce but they CHOOSE to focus on the path most meaningful to them#And that's literally reflected in their unique cycles of reincarnation isn't that just AMAZING#And that's why the team up is so important! If they were all working against each other they'd be locked spinning their wheels#If zelda and ganon teamed up link would immediately die and if link and ganon teamed up zelda would instantly perish#It's the link zelda team up that means ganon is the one who kicks it#Also the elemental thing was cool but they do jump around a bit. Like wind is there half the time#In botk the gerudo have lightning and the goron have fire. Farosh still has lightning tho and dinraal fire#In ss lanaryu was the lightning and faron had water like its all over the place thematically. And that's when it's only 3!#Don't even get me started on the 5/7 lots notankyu#But that's the most common group and it's also thematically accurate#Fire being the only one able to self perpetuate with fuel. Can be banked up again. Ice compresses with time but needs the right environment#Lightning go boom 👍 you can feel the static in the air but you don't know when/where it'll strike and then it's all over#Like fr it's hilarious zelda and ganon are playing the long game and link runs past eats all the pieces and while ganons yelling after him#Zelda checkmates his king. And nobody can prove she wasn't cheating because nobody was looking lmao#Ah the duality of metaphors#ANYWAY isn't that so neat???#Reason no.372 why rhoam was a terrible king he didn't just screw up he did it ✨thematically✨#If link had been allowed to run off and get dirty and if zelda was allowed to study her interest (like post kingdom fall FOR EXAMPLE)#They'd have won (like aoc) but nooooooo. I've already made a post (or 3) about it lmao I'll be quiet now#loz#legend of zelda#botw#triforce#loz link#the legend of zelda#zelda#loz botw#ganondorf#loz ganon
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230708 @ HT_0615
#yeosang#wooyoung#woosang#ateez#kpop#WOOSANGTHEWORLD.........#the fansite's tt profile doesn't say anything about reposting so i did the usual w/ a linked credit#BUT if they don't allow reposting please tell me and i'll delete the post!#i just. gkfhgkjsfhgfs#neon yeo looks so cute... green really is his color :')#AND THAT SAN lol it looks like they had lots of fun!! i'm glad!!
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Idk who needs to hear this but time and time again isn't over!!!
Webtoon removed the "time and time again will return!!!" Banner and I don't know why, but it's not over!!! There's still another 1/3 of the comic to go! There's a lot more stuff that I'm working on and it'll be coming back soon!
Please be patient with me, I know it's been a long time... But the stuff I'm making is really good and there's a lot of reasons it's taken this long. I promise I want it back more than anyone.
I'm trying to come back around the end of October. I'm doing my best to get everything ready in time, so no promises, but I'm on track to do so! I'm just one person writing and drawing everything, and my editor was fired so I'm not even getting any notes anymore. It's literally just me. I'm doing my best I promise!
#im so frustrated that banner has been gone#and people think the comic is over because of that#which is reasonable to think#but it... idk#its already an uphill battle to try snd retain audience after a hiatus this long#let alone when webtoon is actively building thr expectation that theres no need to come back...#im so frustrated#every day there is something new with them its so exhausting#this isnt even the thing I've been majorly stressed about this is a fresh new frustration#i feel like they're not just being unhelpful#at this point i feel like theyre actively sabotaging my career.#im not allowed to promote my books#i can't make my links too big so no one can find me#people dont even know i have a patreon#i can't make any announcements on the comic#and now people think th whole thing is over and it isnt!#im so ;_;#im so frustrated and demoralized#and people complete reasonably are losing patience and interest#and. ah... it's fine. like genuinely it is fine.#it will come back soon and i am doing a good job#and everyone who sees it's back will be happy with what ive done#cause it's good. its really good...#but. yeah. idk. webtoon has been actively keeping me down since the beginning and im so over them#I've been so mistreated aysudjejjdjdjdj#i just want to finish the series and go ;_;#taking all my power to not **** ******#just gotta power through and get the fuck out#text post#update
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im gonna break down my last gifset: the second half of the ep12 intimacy scene, because nat and louis are such good actors ive been rendered slightly braindead more than once due to how well they SOLD this scene and SOLD ai di and chen yi's love for each other through their physicality.
WARNING: if you read this and then use the words top or bottom to describe anything going on here, i will deadass block you. ♥️ don't even think about it. ♥️
this is gonna be unhinged but the mix of horny and pure adoring each other is an ever-crisscrossing line that is simply underappreciated from what ive seen in previous posts of this particular part.
so they've been making out for a while with ai di in chen yi's lap and chen yi decides to push them over… i did not cut a single frame of this btw.
starting with the first two gifs:
i love the way ai di's hand comes to rest perfectly at the nape of chen yi's neck during the impact. then there's a brief "are we gonna kiss?" half of a second before chen yi goes for ai di's neck. and ai di responds appreciatively: with his head tilted back, his hand in chen yi's hair… you see in the second gif his fingers curling a little, to gently trail his nails down chen yi's neck, wordlessly telling chen yi to keep going. and he does, moving from ai di's neck to his chest.
and here we get a moment of ai di going oh. his mouth literally opens a little wider—
—and he lifts up his head as if to check that that's really chen yi doing this to him. all the while his hand has moved from chen yi's neck/hair to rubbing chen yi's shoulder. again in a reassuring "yes that's good" way, and also, i imagine, just for the sake of touching chen yi too.
he looks at chen yi and then full body relaxes into feeling it, while still rubbing chen yi's shoulder. i cant get over ai di's face here, i can't. the whole shot is art, with chen yi kissing just below his ribs.
bc chen yi is so focused on adoring him, on pouring all this love he has for ai di into these gentle kisses and the way he's touching him, too: sliding his hand up ai di's chest to grip his shoulder in return. (also notice ai di's sweatshirt from four years ago hanging up in the background. chen yi has been waiting so long for this too and needs to show it.)
and then— WELL. then ai di slides his hand back up into chen yi's hair…
and chen yi responds to the feeling of it immediately. it's almost like ai di is saying yes, that's good, now come here, and you see chen yi's eyes open and his body immediately follow that cue. perfect wordless communication. ai di's hand is literally pulling him closer (with barely any pressure) and chen yi instinctively responds to it by making his way back up with another soft kiss.
and ai di is watching him, waiting for him. chen yi's hand is sliding along ai di's chest again… you even see ai di's legs open a little at the end of the gif to make room for chen yi to take that space again.
and chen yi does. he really does:
and he does that on purpose. (it's like he's responding to ai di's satisfaction by saying, "let me make it feel even better". while also saying "i love you this much".)
and ai di responds by intentionally adjusting himself to feel more of it:
chen yi moves back from the neck kiss and ai di really said with his body: no, don't you dare take that pressure away.
there is so much going on in those two gifs. starting with the former: you can see ai di leaning back for the neck kiss, and then his hand moves down to chen yi's hip the instant he feels the pressure between his legs, in such a perfectly instinctive movement you can literally see his fingers tighten in chen yi's hair and his toes curl at the edge of the gif. he is completely 100% feeling it. he lifts his head to look.
—& i can't get over the way ai di is always trying to see, to watch chen yi doing this to him. it's chen yi. he has to make sure it's real. he has waited for and wanted this for so long and he isnt dreaming anymore.
and then in the latter: ai di tilts his head back again a little before his shift. his very intentional shifting of hips that physically lifts his back from the bed a little to align them more comfortably and to keep the friction. this movement stops chen yi from kissing ai di's neck again, bringing him to his mouth instead— but not until after ai di's hand on the back of chen yi's neck slides down to cup his cheek. (as if this whole gif says, not only "yes, that feels good, don't stop", but also, "i need you to know i love you".)
they kiss like that: pressed together, looking at each other, ai di cradling chen yi's face with one of his hands. you can see his thumb holding the base of chen yi's jaw in the next gif:
while chen yi in turn pulls his arm out from underneath ai di to prop (only) his chest up a bit higher for the express purpose of just looking at ai di. feeling ai di touching him like this, too. both of them gentle and needy, adoring and eager; all of that fully communicated through their body language.
there is not an inch of them that isnt feeling this moment and isnt completely tuned in to both themselves and the other. it's so intimate and vulnerable and so intentional. and the fact that they are taking their time, always looking at each other, is what makes it so loving and sweet and is also exactly what makes it so hot.
it's chen yi's turn now to check that this is real. to soak this all in and breathe. that's ai di beneath him. against him. loving him.
and it takes a full gif but ai di allows maybe 2 seconds more of looking at each other before reaching up and pulling chen yi into a deeper kiss. he's waited for this for so long—
although first you see ai di's eyes flick down and back up. and let me tell you— he's not looking at chen yi's lips.
chen yi's hand perfectly supports the back of ai di's head and neck as ai di surges up to wrap chen yi in his arms—cup the nape of chen yi's neck in his fingers—pulling himself up and chen yi closer in the same movement.
and this is when and why the camera pans away. because those kisses are getting deeper. they are locked in, they're attached, they are feeling all of it, everything is intentional and loving and very clear about where this scene will be going next.
i just— this is a lot, for me. because it is so intensely loving. and also so intensely horny. like, i've seen some good sex scenes, but it takes some really incredible acting to pull off seeming so fully, devotedly, in love, and be able to show that alongside and through attraction. personally? i haven't seen any bl actors do it better than nat and louis in this scene right here. please notice, as well, that all thirteen of these gifs are of one, continuous, shot.
simply put, it's a very. very. well done scene. AND I NEED TO CHEW DRYWALL.
(final note: a reminder of my warning at the start of this post bc i am serious. there are too many infinitesimal things happening in this scene for these characters to be reduced to stereotypes that, frankly, do not matter in real life. ♥️ no need to respond to this warning either… feel free to focus on what the post is saying instead.)
and that's why chen yi and ai di are better and more real than every other bl couple in existence. ok bye.
#kiseki: dear to me#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#julian watches kiseki#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#nat chen#chen bowen#*mypost#long post#pdribs#only tagging you lin bc im linking this in the original gifset but i know you love analysis so hiiiii 🥰🥰🥰#thank you to the 9 people who voted in my poll telling me to post this#i was going to anyway but i love to see more people on board for this shit#& like. okay i may SEEM composed in this post but PUHLEASE know that i spent the whole time giffing this last night losing my fucking mind#and getting very very distracted. and reminding myself to breathe#because#WHHEWWWWWJFKSDJFLKSHLGDSAJSDFJ#dear god is this ALLOWED?????? IS THIS ALLOWED?#EVIDENTLY YES!#and THANK god. thank fucking god
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ryansegedi: I have been fortunate to have @anthonygreen666 be a part of this project for three years in a row now. First with @circasurvive and now with @lsdunes His work has moved me since Avalon. My favorite part about Anthonys work is it has a way of growing up WITH you. It's not stuck in the past and it's not too far in the future. It's a real sweet spot. Ls dunes is a killer project that feels refreshing and new but doesn't forget where it comes from. Anyone who appreciates the artistry of live performance needs to see him on a stage! Thank you for sharing your music with us.
First: 2021 Circa Survive / Second: 2022 LS Dunes
I|:: 'Grey Veins' is a favorite of mine that starts with a massive bass line that just makes you want to DaNcE.
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maybe link should consider that I filled my inventory with salted milky smoothies right before the fight and spent all that time leveling up the sword and energy gauges tho ...🥲
#when tri said give him the sword back i was like NO!!!! IM GOING TO SHOVE HIM OFF THIS CLIFF TRI DONT TRI ME!!#ILL TURN THIS FROM ECHOES OF WISDOM TO ECHOES OF WIDOW REAL FAST (ZELDA WILL BE A WIDOW)#i think post game should have a mode where u can refight the bosses and get them as echoes at least if ur not allowed to use swordfighter#in the last fight...like...give me SOMETHING here#eow spoilers#echoes of wisdom spoilers#echoes of wisdom#loz eow spoilers#loz eow#zelda#link#princess zelda#eow#loz#the legend of zelda#legend of zelda#fanart#ms paint#doodle#comics#truly the quickest lil doodle comic of my life but i know from complaining abt this on my main other ppl got miffed abt this too!!#that being said its still my fav game in recent years i ADORE THIS game dont take this as like serious hate lol#i get WHY they did this. i get it! but Still wasnt what /i personally/ wanted so i will gripe abt my Opinions#im queueing this to come out (1) week after i draw it so maybe everyone is done by now but if not . sry for the spoilers. i tagged every#possible blacklistable term i could think of </3#&yes I know why they did it thematically etc no one needs to Um Actually 🤓☝️ me this is my opinion 🧍🏻 pls just scroll if u disagree this is#silly hehe 10 min comic not. a serious real thing. u know??#I love link and I am glad we got to do stuff with him at the end I wish it would’ve just been more of the split room puzzles together and#we both got to fight also .
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ALRIGHT EVERYONE: I've decided to do this for real this time.
Pick a song, ANY song included in the playlist above that you'd like to hear me sing, and submit it to the forms below it! Once I've gathered enough submissions, I will take the top results — excluding anything I know for sure I can't sing — and I will record an acapella cover on my shitty phone mic.
Actually, no, scratch that — I won't record an acapella cover. I will record THREE! So hurry up and make your submissions before the clock runs out!
#my posts#blue music#i think this allows for multiple submissions (and I encourage them!) but if it doesn't let me know#obviously don't submit stuff like instrumentals or screamo because I'll just ignore those#the playlist linked is my Master Playlist so there's gonna be a lot of unviable stuff in there#Spotify
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every time i stumble on some vocal incest shipper in unrelated tags i become more and more convinced 90% of people don’t actually understand what incest is. like, at all
#incest ment#also none of these people ever trigger tag their shit!#i have to filter the word incest bc if i filtered like Hashtag Incest TW nothing would ever get filtered#also the irony to me of these people trying to do like Social Justice Education about other shit but neverrrr like#so much as reblogging a link to RAINN or whatever#i am going to start making spn fans read that abused boys book before they’re allowed to post online#the self help one i had to read back in the day#I WASNT EVEN IN YHE SPN TAG. LIKE. HELP
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genshin fandom are HEAVILY sleeping on audhd ajax childe tartaglia
(headcanons in the read more!)
i meaaaan;
stimming - he likes making stuff out of water and fidgeting with them, especially if he's bored; spinning water weapons (like he does in one of his idle animations), making little water creatures (he probably makes them fight), mimicking things around him/in his mind out of water - he messes with his cape as a stim (like in that other idle animation) - him just repeating something just because he likes saying it, like 'coco goat' or some word zhongli taught him impulsivity - THE most impulsive guy ever - impulsive to the point where he'll just throw himself into danger because he has free will - will see some big horrifying monster, think 'i wonder if i could take that' (in a fight), then will attack unless someone stops him - constantly gets himself into trouble because he reacts before he thinks - i headcanon that him using foul legacy against the traveler was him genuinely losing his shit and wasn't planned
(and he probably just laid on the roof of the golden house like 'owww ouagh owww' until the battle with osial was done... also zhongli was watching liyue defend itself on a nearby mountain, like how a worried mother might watch her kids cook for the first time, and just happened to see the orange cat on the roof) hyperactivity - has a brain that never stops - ultra instincts adhd, like rick riordan says - if he ever stops moving, he'll die - complains if he has to stay still - probably fidgets non-stop - the tsaritsa is an ally and has plenty of random crap to fiddle with on harbinger coats socializing - canonically the odd one out among his peers (granted, his peers are all scheming goth people) - i swear he (canonically) constantly misses social cues and takes things literally... - he misses social cues more than he misses crits - blunt and straightforward, and prefers that way of communicating - headcanon that zhongli lying to him actually hurt his feelings and his reaction was genuine... (and that reaction is a little too relatable, as someone who's neurodivergent... 😔🤨) - this is probably an english-only thing, but his little 'haha' in stressful circumstances is him masking/coping with the situation and doing a brain reset, or just his default 'how the fuck am i meant to react to that' response (citation: I DO THAT!!) - somehow masks and unmasks at the same time, like how he's wearing his literal mask on his head - will just come out with the most profound and deep truths, this jumpscares people (especially ones who think he's a total dumbass) - childe unmasking is just him with no expression, doing things in almost complete silence, even before the abyss he brought the vibe to the function that neurotypicals hate - ^ he'll never unmask around his fellow harbingers because he doesn't like them but also he likes annoying them hyperfixations/special interests - easy 'he's obsessed with battle' connection, c'mannn - and easy 'he's got an interest in weaponry', duhhhh - but imagine him just being able to identify any fish, too. - hyperfixated on liyue history, cuisine and culture during his stay there, probably kept getting zhongli to talk about whatever he was hyperfixating on that week (btw zhongli's autistic too, it's because he's hot, sorry i don't make the rules) - picks up 1 million hobbies and hyperfixates on them either for a week or until he's mastered them (the one week ones get shelved until he masters them) nerfed by celestia, AKA idk what to title this section - i just can't see childe being able to sit there and finish paperwork like a regular guy - northland bank managers fear him (he hands in paperwork one minute before the deadline) - pulcinella probably handles his important harbinger documents because childe lost too many of them - exchanged his quick moving and dodging in battle for a weekly sacrifice (he trips over something or breaks things through clumsiness; him and lynette are comrades in arms for breaking machines) - his sleep schedule is that he doesn't have one - he turns into some hunter-gatherer eater, unless someone with a normal routine is around, then he follows them and has regular meals at regular times (as opposed to him cooking borscht at 11AM
#genshin impact#childe#ajax childe tartaglia#i made a sideblog just to say this (and because i have so many genshin posts that would probably annoy my mutuals lmfaooo)#he's so relatable...#i too go demon mode if i can't find my keys#i love unintentional representation#childe headcanons#i uhhh wrote a lot wow#before anyone comes for me: i'm like 90% sure i have audhd so i'm allowed to audhd truth video game character#was going through voicelines for fun and his one about 'battle lines' (?) made me think 'oh my god. autism.'#on a serious note there's symbolism you could get from him literally hiding a huge part of himself from his family (+lots of lgbt parallels#and... like... the changeling vibes of his backstory. which is theorized to be linked to autistic kids.#alhaitham and childe are two sides of the autism spectrum#yoimiya and childe packbond immediately through adhd
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