#it’s not a perfect analog but. points. he’s just like me

[concorp]

thinking about maxo and the parasite. about how even if the island had better medical care, it has effectively given him a chronic illness/disability. the massive chunk of his leg isn’t coming back, even if the code inside it goes away somehow. getting rid of the code likely could make it worse even, since it seems that it’s the only thing still holding his leg together. even if he escapes the island that’s made him sick, he’s not going to get magically better.

[agirlwithglam]

how to stop being so obsessed with them.

heyyy bestieees! heres a few tips to stop you from being so obsessed with them cus honeyyy its just not worth it. it doesn't just have to be romantically btw!

"she's literally perfect.. like how??" <- affirmations!

༄ ✬ move on! ༄ ✬

numero uno. move on. okay hear me out! there are 8 billion people in the world. (8 billion freeky deeking people). do yk how much that it? a lot of 0s. and i know for a fact that SO MANY of them would be thrilled to know you, to spend time with you, to love and respect you! if that 1 person out of 8 billion people doesn't seem to recognise your worth, so what?!

"oh but they're perfect and i just love them so much!" ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... sorry, what do you love again? the fact that they don't care enough to return a text, treat you right, make you feel loved?

"i just want them to love me back and treat me the way they treat others because they are so funny and always seem to make me and other people laugh!" oh ma lawd. ur not serious r u? you are?! okokok i won't make fun of you. i can relate to how that feels. but sweetheart, 8 billion. trust me, you'll find a lot more people who are twice as funnier and caring who will love you to the moon and back and make you feel like the most specialist person ever and massage ur crusty musty toes. jk about the last one- unless u want that?

༄ ✬ not everyone will know your worth. ༄ ✬

so asking questions like "but why can't they realise how great i am? or how funny i am? or how loving i am? i would do anything for them, why can't they realise that and treat me the same way back?" im sorry honey but the world doesn't work that way. if someone doesn't feel or treat you as if you're the most glamorous girl in the world, then you need to stop giving them sm energy and importance.

heres an analogy that i got from simonesquared on youtube: in gilmore girls, Rory has this super rich boyfriend Logan right? (who has the most cutest smile ever i might add) and he buys Rory a birkin bag. now to Rory, she doesn't realise the value of a bag like that! to her, its just another bag. she's grateful of course, but she doesn't fully realise the immense value this type of bag has.

༄ ✬ have a life outside of them.༄ ✬

lemme repeat that. have. a. fleeping. life. outside. of. them. they should NOT be the center of your life or the cause of all your actions NUH UH ABSOLUTELY NOT! its okay to do SOME things with the thought of them, but that part is separate from the rest of your life. your life is your life, not theirs!!

this can mean going to the gym, working out, finding new hobbies, educating yourself, self care, etc etc! but don't go about your life, thinking about them. you go about your life thinking about YOU.

༄ ✬ stop chasing them. ༄ ✬

"gee, thanks vanilla. thats so helpful! how did i not think about that earlier?" im assuming thats sarcasm, but whateverr. okay so if they know that you're chasing them, that you're obsessed with them, yk what they'll think? they'll think that 'oh! this person is chasing me, so she really wants me. so she'll stick around. i dont really need to try too hard to keep her cus i know she'll stay. i'll explore my options in the meantime :)'

GIRL do not so available like this! BE BUSY (which relates to the point before). once you glow up, work on your life, not taking it so seriously, and just being happy and enjoying this beautiful gift of life, they will start to think: 'oh! this person (you) is actually quite fabulous. i better try to make her feel happy/ be friends with her before i miss this awesome opportunity!'

cus girl, cmon, you've got things to do, places to be, and people to talk to. i've got goals and dreams and my bucket list. you don't have the time to sit here and be crazy obsessed. so like, if they just leave, um okay and? "yes, and?" what about it? am i meant to be bothered? likerrr okay, byee? i mean, i've got a lot of things to do so i could try to fit in a "help i need you" session between my pilates class and my cooking class? jk <3

༄ ✬ give yourself the damn love. ༄ ✬

why are you obsessed with them? why are you head over heels for somebody who literally couldn't care less? its because they have something that you feel like you're lacking.

is it the fact that they always seem so happy and laughing-y with people around them? that they get super high marks on their test? they are attractive? they have a high status? money? what is it?? often, we can actually give these things to ourselves. some, easier than others. but not impossible. if you really wanted to, you would get up, dust yourself up, and give yourself the love you crave. What you want in others, give to yourself first.

More resources:

How to stop comparing yourself & feel fulfilled without needing external validation.

Thewizardliz: becoming selfish was the best thing i did

Lumma Aziz’s videos

[jjkamochoso]

It's me again lol!! What about jjk men taking the reader on an aquarium date or like a museum date! ^_^

UR MIND >>>>>>> SO ADORABLE

Also I’m now including Ino because I can’t believe I’ve been forgetting to add my pookie in these

Enjoy and thanks for the request!!! <3

JJK Men Taking You on a Date to the Aquarium/Museum

Fluff

JJK men x gn!reader

Warnings: none

Yuji:

“That fish looks like you.”

Your eyes fell to where Yuji’s finger was pointing. There was a huge fish with big, bulging eyes swimming in circles in the aquarium exhibit in front of you.

“Oh, really, does it?” You were thoroughly amused at your boyfriend’s antics, his grin widening as you played along. “This one is a spitting image of you.”

Yuji caught a glimpse of the fish you were pointing at and turned away from you, making you frown. Did you inadvertently hurt his feelings? The fish wasn’t *that* ugly. Besides, you both were joking around, but you never meant to go too far and make him sad. You tentatively put a hand on his back to get his attention.

“Yuji, I didn’t—”

He faced you again, this time sporting a quintessential fish face with his cheeks sucked in and lips protruding in a pout. You immediately started cracking up, and since laughter is contagious, especially among you two, so did he.

“There’s lots of cute fish here, but you were the cutest,” you finally said, making him blush. He grasped your hand tightly and you set off for another exhibit.

Megumi:

When Megumi asked you on a date to an art museum, you were elated. A quiet, calm activity like this was perfect for the both of you so you could enjoy each other’s company without many other people observing you. You walked side by side with the boy as you meandered through the exhibit that was showcasing artwork of animals in ancient civilizations. You stopped in front of a particularly cute sculpture of a dog, cooing softly.

“Megumi, look how adorable,” you said, and he nodded in agreement.

“Reminds me of my own,” he mused, referring to his divine dogs (you thought it was precious how close he was to his shikigami).

“Maybe we can bribe the curator with Gojo’s money to take it home with us.”

Megumi shot you a look. “Are you serious? I don’t think you can just take art like that.”

A few seconds passed.

“Can you?”

“I don’t know,” you said, “I was joking.”

Megumi was quiet as usual but the air about him seemed almost contemplative. After a few more seconds, he shook his head and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Gojo would probably break it anyway.”

“Wait, were you actually considering trying to buy it?” you questioned.

“Maybe.” The black haired boy shrugged, moving on to the next sculpture.

“Fushiguro the art collector, huh? Who would’ve thought you were so extravagant. Gojo’s spending habits must have rubbed off on you,” you teased, making him huff.

“Shut up,” he said, no bite to his tone whatsoever as you just giggled, cuddling up to his side as you continued on with your date.

Yuta:

“It’s like getting a million little kisses. I’m so in love with this creature.”

"Am I… jealous of a starfish?”

You were currently holding a starfish in your hands, its suction cups sticking to your skin, leaving behind a tickling sensation that you couldn’t get enough of. Your boyfriend, on the other hand, wasn’t a fan of your kissing analogy and was doing his best not to pout over something so silly.

“Yuta, come closer! It’s too cute not to hold.”

He couldn’t deny he was curious to see what the hype was about. People had flocked over to this exhibit in droves and you guys had waited in line to hold a sea star for an ungodly amount of time—he wasn’t going to miss out now. The handler put one in his hands too and he immediately understood what you meant earlier.

“They are really cute. I see what you meant by the whole kissing thing, that’s amazing,” he said, his voice laced with wonder and amusement as he watched the sea creature grip onto his skin. He then looked up and locked eyes with you, both of your irises alight with love.

“But I still prefer yours.”

Inumaki:

There’s plenty of fish in the sea but you’re the only one for me.

You raised an eyebrow at the words on the phone screen shoved in front of your face while you were watching some fish swim by in the aquarium tank. Toge, meanwhile, was dying laughing at his lame pick up line written in his notes app. Seeing his reaction made your lips quirk up into a mischievous grin as something came to mind. You pulled out your own phone and hurriedly began typing, thrusting it toward him when you were done.

I cod-nt imagine my life without you, Toge. You’re a reel catch.

You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped your throat when you saw the grimace he wore.

“Fish flakes,” he said, putting his head in his hands and stifling giggles.

“My line was that bad, huh?” you asked, nudging him softly.

“Salmon,” he agreed, but the loving look he held in his eyes when they met yours again showed he was anything but bothered.

“You’re of-fish-ally the cutest boy I’ve ever seen,” you told him while ruffling his hair playfully, earning a loud groan from the blonde. He quickly typed out another sentence.

I’m so glad we go to the same school.

Noritoshi:

You were pleasantly surprised when Noritoshi asked you on a date to the aquarium. You figured he would’ve deemed it too childish or an experience not scholarly enough but you were wrong, now feeling the pull of his hand as he excitedly walked you around, pointing things out and chatting about things he had just learned.

“…and I just read that most fish don’t have eyelashes. Did you see that too?”

“Except for sharks,” you replied, a gentle smiling resting on your face.

“Exactly.”

Noritoshi took a deep breath as you led him to a bench to sit down and watch the jellyfish float around.

“I’m sorry for getting too passionate. I just feel like I can be myself here. There’s less… pressure, if that makes sense. Like I can learn things just to know them, not to impress anyone or get a good grade on something. It’s… nice.”

“You don’t have to apologize, I know what you mean,” you said, laying a comforting hand on his leg. Noritoshi rested his hand on top of yours and gave it a light squeeze, observing the entrancing dance of the jellyfish.

“They look so free,” he muttered. “I wonder what that feels like.”

Your head was now lovingly balanced against his shoulder as you squeezed his hand back.

“I promise you that one day you’ll know.”

Todo:

“Y/n! You have to watch this!”

You were happy to accompany Aoi to the local science museum for a date. You two were having a fun time exploring and trying out all the different experiments the museum had to offer. You weren’t sure what to expect when Aoi called you over to the experiment he had just done since you were enthralled in a presentation about lightning. You were confused when Aoi put his hand on a big ball, but all of a sudden, the hair in his bun became even spikier than normal.

“Static electricity!” he exclaimed, sporting a huge grin. Seeing how happy all of this made your boyfriend had you smiling from ear to ear as well. When he eventually took his hand off the orb, his hair didn’t quite go back into place.

“C’mere,” you giggled, gesturing to his hair, “I’ll fix it for you.”

“Thank you, my love,” he said, leaning over to where you could reach him. You combed the strands back into place and gave him a kiss on the cheek when you were done.

“You’re having a fun time today, right?” Aoi asked you, a rare moment of vulnerability from the muscular man.

“Of course, Aoi. Thank you for inviting me here.”

“No problem,” he replied, his cocky demeanor back as he winked at you. “Now, if you’re interested, there’s a presentation on superconductors in a few minutes. Do you want to see it?”

It always surprised you when you remembered just how smart your sometimes air-headed boyfriend really was.

Gojo:

When you invited Satoru to the science museum, he was extremely excited. Not because of the science aspect, no, but because he loved to eat the packs of freeze dried ice cream you can buy from the gift shop. You were busy reading a giant wall panel about physics when you felt the thunk of a head resting on your back and heard a sigh of exasperation.

“Are you finished yet? This is boring,” Satoru said, mumbling into your shirt.

“I’m trying to learn, Satoru. It wouldn’t kill you to learn something either. You’re a teacher, aren’t you supposed to have a thirst for knowledge?”

“I have a thirst for soda,” came a muffled reply from behind you. You rolled your eyes, going back to reading. Satoru kept fidgeting and you found yourself getting frustrated at his lack of focus.

“Since you know so much, why don’t you tell me about relativity and quantum mechanics?”

“Quantum mechanics studies the world by looking at just a few small particles like photons and electrons. Relativity is the theory of gravitation that Einstein proposed around the same time as quantum mechanics. General relativity studies the construct of space-time and gravity, while special relativity studies special conditions and scenarios, such as length contraction, which is where an object is moving near the speed of light and its length actually shortens. See, I already know this stuff, so can we pleeeease go to the gift shop now?” Satoru whined, throwing his head back in an exaggerated display of boredom. Your mind was still reeling over the fact that your boyfriend was… ridiculously good at science and never bothered to tell you?!

“I… yeah,” you said, completely dumbfounded. Satoru ignored the confusion in your voice as he cheered, grabbing your hand and leading you to the gift shop.

Geto:

You and Suguru were taking your time walking through the museum he chose for your date. It was nice to walk with him, holding hands and enjoying deep conversations about the pieces that were showcased in each exhibit. You came up to a bench in front of a particularly large infographic and took a seat, your lover sitting next to you. After he knew you were finished reading, he asked you the few little words he assumed would set you off on a passionate tangent (he was right).

“So, y/n, what are your thoughts on this topic?”

As you began to analyze everything you just learned, Suguru watched you intently, but not in a negative manner; he was just so genuinely interested in what you had to say that it was like the whole world around him disappeared every time you opened your mouth. He nodded along, hearing you bring up things he hadn’t even considered yet.

“I’m lucky to have a partner who’s so intelligent,” Suguru cooed, his thumb ghosting over your jawline, initiating this romantic moment like you two were the only people in the building. To him, you were the only people that mattered anyway, so what was the point in hiding how he truly felt?

Nanami:

“C’mon Kento, it’s not as scary as you think it is. They’re completely harmless.”

You were currently trying to get your boyfriend to pet the stingrays but he was not having any part of it. The color had drained from Kento’s face when you submerged your hand in the clear water, feeling the smooth surface of the rays under your fingertips. The blonde man wasn’t afraid, per se, but he didn’t think it was the wisest decision to be touching such a dangerous animal.

“Y/n, I just don’t think it’s a good idea. What if you provoke them?”

You were about to laugh when you saw he was genuinely distressed. Frowning, you stood up and tried to dry your wet hand the best you could before reaching out to him.

“Kento, honey, it’s alright. They have to be really angry to sting people. I promise you’ll be alright if you try it.”

Kento relented and leaned over the touch tank, hesitantly placing his hand in the water next to yours. When a ray swam under him, the rubbery texture gracing his skin, he immediately tensed up. Your unoccupied hand landed on his arm as encouragement and it seemed to help him relax a bit. A few more stingrays came over to him and Kento finally calmed down, smiling as he greeted his new friends.

Ino:

“Babe, look, that’s literally us.”

Ino caught your attention away from a particularly interesting exhibit about seaweed as he pointed to a diagram that displayed two fish with their mouths on each other.

“Ino, that’s very sweet, but I think they’re fighting.”

Your boyfriend leaned closer to read the tiny print, his hands in his pockets in a display of nonchalance that you always found supremely attractive.

“Oh, you’re right! They try to flip each other over like that. It’s like the Spider-Man kiss but more badass.”

You shook your head, lightly chuckling as you linked your arm in his and continued walking through the aquarium. All of a sudden, you gasped and tapped Ino’s arm excitedly.

“Oh my god! This is literally us!”

Ino’s eyes went wide and his smile grew bigger. You were showing him to a video that displayed otters holding hands as they drifted in the water.

“Yeah,” he said dreamily, resting his chin on the top of your head as you watched the animals on the screen, “it is.”

Choso:

You were sitting in a dark room of the planetarium, looking up at a projected sky full of stars with your handsome boyfriend. Choso had his arm wrapped tightly around your body, hand resting on your waist as your head was nestled against his shoulder. You sat there quietly, enjoying the peacefulness of the exhibit. The sight of the stars above you changed into a slow spinning view of the earth and you gasped lightly.

“Woah, look at how beautiful our world is.” You didn’t hear him reply, which was unusual, so you lowered your eyes from the spectacular scene above to look at the man next to you.

“You’re my world,” he stated bluntly, unrelenting gaze boring into your own. “You’re the brightest star in the galaxy of my life.”

“You’re so cheesy,” you said, trying not to show how flustered you got over his beautiful words. He just drew you in closer, adamant to never let you go.

Toji:

“How does this piece make you feel?”

“Like I’ve been here for hours and I’m hungry.”

Toji wasn’t the biggest fan of the art museum you dragged him to but you were glad he allowed you to take him here in the first place. It meant a lot to you that he would willingly go somewhere like this that completely disinterested him, but he would go to the ends of the earth to please you.

“There’s a cafe around here if you wanna go eat,” you said, paying him no mind as you studied the painting that grabbed your attention.

Toji scoffed. “And leave you here by yourself? No way.”

Your focus was now broken, instead trying to stifle a laugh at his overprotective behavior. “The art isn’t going to kidnap me, you know.”

“I know,” he grumbled, folding his arms across his chest, “but some dude might see a smart, attractive person like you by yourself and think he has a chance.”

“And I need my big, hot, uninterested-in-art boyfriend to keep an eye out for me?”

“Exactly.” Toji smirked at you while you rolled your eyes playfully.

“I appreciate that. I’ll finish up here and we’ll head to the cafe together then?”

“Sounds good to me.”

You went back to your contemplative state while Toji’s eyes wandered the room. He would never tell you this, but he found many of the pieces actually interesting and hoped you would take him along to more places like this in the future.

[tls12lessthan3]

can i tell you guys about my interpretation of a no-scenarios relationship between kim dokja and yoo sangah. im gonna do it anyway. the thing about a no-scenarios relationship of any kind between kim dokja and yoo sangah, for me, is i really think it would be so difficult for a genuine connection to form between them because kim dokja ultimately dehumanizes and fictionalises her the same way he does yoo joonghyuk. like his specific brand of dissosiation works as him viewing the world through the lens of fiction and he applies that so heavily to yoo sangah when we first meet her. she and him already have some vague form of relationship by this point - i would not call them friends but he moved those cameras for her! he kept her secret! and she knew and trusted him to an extent. that is on top of their teamwork in the job interview.

but we know none of this when we first meet yoo sangah because dokja views her as a heroine who would never cross genres with him, and he erases their history together in the process. he does the same thing with her putting pepper in her boss's coffee - thats not something a perfect pretty heroine would do so we have no idea she did it until she tells us, because kim dokja sort of - filters it out. he smoothes down the edges of her reality as a person and all the 'out of character' things she does into an easily digestible character he can push away as 'from a different genre'. and this is a massive fucking disservice to yoo sangah!! for the same reasons what kim dokja does to yoo joonghyuk is a massive fucking disservice to him!!

shes not a heroine! shes not perfect! shes not from a different genre! shes just a person and she wants to be your friend! i think if they were friends outside of the scenario kim dokja would a) try and push her away and more interestingly to me b) he would continue to try and slot her into his worldview as a 'heroine protagonist' and i think that would really grate on her. especially considering how the role kim dokja creates for her has some parallels to the one her parents made for her. kim dokjas lesson over orv of coming to understand the 'characters' as people is analogous for the one he would need in real life - just like his relationship with yoo joonghyuk couldnt reach its peak until he stopped viewing him as a character, he would need a similar journey of realization to start really understanding yoo sangah. its only then i could see them getting really close.

[sophieinwonderland]

The Plurality of... Bill Cipher (The Book of Bill)

Spoiler Warning for Gravity Falls, The Book of Bill, and the nature of reality as you know it

Hello dear reader.

I recently found in my possession a strange book with no explanation as to how it got there. A bizarre tome known only as The Book of Bill.

I recognized the name and imagery from someone else's memories. Bill Cipher, a character from Alex Hirsch's hit series Gravity Falls.

It honestly seemed too perfect. I've been doing this "Plurality of..." series where I look at plurality in media. And an important part of Bill's shtick was possession.

It seemed simple enough. I can read the book, learn a bit about Bill and his possession, and then write an article about his plurality. But the reality was anything by simple, with far more than I bargained for.

And by the end of this post, this book will have driven me to break a fundamental rule I've held sacred through my "Plurality Of..." series.

What is Plurality?

Before we begin, I should explain what plurality is for anyone new here. Plurality is a term for being multiple in one body in some way.

We call the body's occupants "headmates". These can be anything from alters in dissociative disorders to spirit guides bound to a mortal, to... yes... even literal demonic possession.

Yeah, even being possessed by a demonic triangle from a 2-dimensional universe is a type of plurality. If there are multiple self-conscious agents of some kind there, it's plural!

Time To Get Weird!

(Art by magentasnail)

Let's catch you up on the basics real quick. Again, there will be huge Gravity Falls spoilers.

In Gravity Falls, Bill Cipher is a yellow a 2-dimensional triangle demon bent on causing chaos.

Through the series, Bill makes deals with multiple characters to possess their bodies. This includes both gaining full control over the body of protagonist Dipper Pines for an episode, and more interestingly, sharing control over the body of Stanford Pines for an extended period of time.

Bill's possession of Dipper left Dipper outside his body like a ghost. But his deal with Stanford is much more plural in nature, where they shared control, with Bill only controlling the body in his sleep.

Obviously real plural systems don't have headmates controlling their body while they sleep like this, but the experience can be seen as analogous to dissociative identity disorder, where it's common to experience blackouts and "wake up" in situations unsure how you got there.

That's all you really need to know about Bill for the time being.

With that out of the way, it's time get weird and dive straight into the Book of Bill!

The Book of Bills

As I begin reading the Book of Bill, I'm given a warning from Stanford Pines that the book will rewrite itself based on the mind of the reader. This seems silly, and I of course dismiss the idea out of hand. Surely there's no way a book could change itself based on who's reading it.

As I venture further into this tome, I find the occasional point of interest. References to Bill living in people's brain, him being an idea, etc.

I stop briefly to ponder that. Why does Bill refer to himself as an idea? Isn't he canonically a being from a physical 2-dimensional world? Him being described as an idea is peculiar, but something I tuck away for the future.

The first thing I find that really piques my interest in regards to plurality is the multiple times that it's just referenced that there are multiple Bills in Bill's head. Such as when Bill refers to "the voices in his head" teaming up.

In the plural community, there's a concept known as median system.

A median system is typically a system which has separate parts that are less distinct from each other. There's a pretty solid case that Bill, having a bunch of Bills in his head, could be considered a median system on his own.

In fact, the book itself actually depicts communication between multiple Bills, in the form of an interview.

And throughout the interview, there are times where the Prime Bill seemingly gets annoyed at the interviewer's questions. As if they are actually different people. While this could be Bill simply duplicating himself and pretending for comedic effect, it could just as easily be that both Bills are headmates in Bill's system.

Bill being a median system is a pretty interesting direction.

As I read on though, the book dragged me down yet another rabbit hole, and raised an important question.

Does Bill Have A Dissociative Disorder???

Let's talk about dissociative identity disorder. There are two main criteria for DID. Criterion A is the presence of two or more distinct personality states. You know, like those Bills in Bill's head.

The second is memory loss.

Recurrent gaps in the recall of everyday events, important personal information, and/or traumatic events.

This is what was on my mind when Bill was describing how he was uniquely gifted with the ability to see into the third dimension, and wanted to teach others this same skill.

But when he tries to recount it... this happened...

To me, this sounds exactly what was described in criterion B. This is also called dissociative amnesia.

And it's not just this one-off example. Bill actually references later that he dissociates (his words) and "wakes up" later after a conquest.

With everything we know, it seems incredibly likely that Bill has DID, or at least a related disorder.

Bill is what he eats

Okay... wait...

So Bill can ALSO imprison the souls of those he eats inside himself, and they can apparently take over Bill's body too???

What actually is going on here? Is this one of Bill's powers? He can just eat entire universes and then whatever he consumes becomes a part of him? Or maybe it's something else...

Maybe if we looked at this less literally and consider the previous hints of Bill having a dissociative disorder then perhaps what is going on is that Bill is introjecting these people.

Maybe whenever he enters somebody's mind, some piece of them remains...

I would love to speculate more on this... But this is the only mention of it in the entire book!

At this point, I begin to reflect on the words at the beginning. Maybe it was true that the book was changing itself to give me what I wanted. Little hints of plurality to keep me reading, to ensnare me in its vicious trap and ultimately drive me to madness.

And the worst part was, I was falling into it anyway. Because I had to know, even if this was a trap, I was in it to the very end. My thirst for knowledge and understanding unquenchable.

Even if I knew I should stop here, there was no going back.

Stanford Pines, Bill's Perfect Host

At last, beyond all of the misdirects that were put in my way, I arrived at the reason that I started on this journey.

Stanford Pines.

I need to say that when I started this journey, planning to delve into what the plurality of Bill and Ford might be like, I never imagined that it would be handled so... Beautifully.

I mean that genuinely!

I love the relationship of these two characters in the book!

They are both very out of place in their own ways. Both are aware of things in their world that are denied by others, leaving them ridiculed and ostracized for it. They manage to form a genuine friendship. Even if Bill was using Stanford the whole time to achieve his Weirdmageddon.

The two compliment each other surprisingly well. Bill provides Stanford with a friend who can get him out of his comfort zone, which is something that I think Stanford really needed.

There's a really fun part of the book where Bill just gets Stanford mind-drunk, which is apparently something he can do.

Bill fills a role in Stanford's life that nobody had since he lost contact with his brother. While Stanford had friend in with Fiddleford, his lab partner, and we do get to see parts of that friendship in the book, they are more like work acquaintances.

Alas, it wasn't meant to be. Because in the end, Bill is still an evil demon who was bent on bringing about the Weirdmageddon and was manipulating Ford the whole time.

And when Stanford found out, he tried to shut Bill out. This led to Bill trying to communicate through sticky notes to get Ford to stop ignoring him. He would front in the body at night while Ford slept, and they carried on a conversation through these sticky notes.

Wait... Sticky notes?

This is such an interesting choice for the character! Especially after so many hints of Bill Cipher having some sort of dissociative disorder.

Why?

Because sticky notes are an actual method that real DID systems use to communicate with their alters, as seen in this post from the NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) website.

It's fascinating how, if you were to try to depict how headmates with strong dissociative barriers might communicate, this is one of the ways you would want to do that!

Is this coincidental? Maybe. But the talk of dissociation earlier suggests the author also has at least some basic knowledge of dissociation and how it works. And, perhaps, plurality as well?

Overall, this whole section with Bill and Ford was fantastic, and it was well-worth the read for that on its own.

The End?

I suppose this is the end. I found what I wanted. I got the content I was after. A cool plural story of a guy and his headmate from another dimension who wants to take over the world.

Through all the strange distractions and hints of Bill himself having headmates that seemingly went nowhere, I got more plurality in the book than I expected.

And yet, as I turn the final page of the book, I feel unsatisfied. Unsettled.

"Is that it?" I think to myself.

This is Gravity Falls, a show built on mysteries, and looking deeper than the surface. Surely there has to be more. Right?

What if... all the plurality in this book, is obscuring something deeper? Or maybe hinting at something deeper...

And then... I see it!

After the final page, I come to the About the Author section.

Which means it's time to talk about...

The Plurality of... Bill Cipher Alex Hirsch

Yes, I am going there!

In the beginning, I promised that this post will require me to break a rule I've held sacred through these posts.

That rule... is to never speculate on the plurality of the author.

But, Alex Hirsch, at least in a fictional sense, hasn't exactly shied away from the idea of being "possessed" by Bill. This dates back at least a decade, with him making Tweets like this one.

"Bill Cipher" even did an AMA on Reddit through Alex, playing it off as Bill possessing Hirsch while he slept.

It's a pretty open secret in the Gravity Falls community that Alex Hirsch is "possessed" by Bill. At least in some meta-fiction way that may not be canon to Gravity Falls but isn't quite real either.

And were my analysis to stop here, I wouldn't really be saying anything new or valuable. A lot of this was covered by MatPat on Film Theory.

But there's something I want to go back to that confuses me in this book.

That Bill Cipher... is an idea?

Let's bring this full circle, back to the beginning of the book where Bill mentions that he's imaginary and describes himself as an idea.

These are such weird lines because Bill didn't seem to have originated from people's minds within the narrative of Gravity Falls.

His story is of being a being from a literal flat world. So why then, does he describe himself as an idea? Why does he describe himself as imaginary???

Bill Cipher as Alex Hirsch's Tulpa

While Bill being an idea doesn't make sense if he's speaking as a being from a 2-dimensional world that's real to him, it does make sense if we consider that the Bill talking to us, who wrote the Book of Bill, is a tulpa sharing the body of its creator.

Before going on though, we need to answer an important question. What is a tulpa? The r/tulpas subreddit gives its own answer to this in its FAQ.

The simplest way to describe a tulpa is simply another person who was created intentionally/unintentionally through repeated interaction and shares a body and mind with their creator. A more complicated definition can go as follows: A tulpa is believed to be an autonomous consciousness coinhabiting a brain with their creator, often with a form of their creator's initial choice and design. A tulpa is entirely sentient and in control of their opinions, feelings, form and movement. They are willingly created via a number of techniques to act as companions, muses, and advisers. Tulpa forms can either be visualized in the mind's eye, or, with practice, seen as a hallucinatory figure using a technique called imposition.

And let's stop there on the line about being created as muses, because this is something that's found repeated throughout both The Book of Bill and Journal 3, with Stanford referring to Bill as his "muse."

It's a curious term that doesn't appear in the show, but was added to the lore in these two supplemental books.

The FAQ goes on to explain that while tulpas are often considered to be intentionally created, there are also accidental tulpas that can arise through imaginary friends or from writing characters.

Is it possible to accidentally make a tulpa? Yes - many people join the community after realizing they have had tulpas all their lives, but without knowing what they were called. These "accidental" tulpas often arise from imaginary friends and writing/roleplay characters.

On the point of roleplay characters, something I also haven't mentioned yet is that Alex Hirsch didn't just write the character of Bill Cipher. He WAS Bill Cipher. In the show, Bill is one of the characters Hirsch voices along with Grunkle Stan and Soos.

Writing tulpas and how they come about are discussed a bit more below:

Is this a new phenomena? No, it's a practice that goes back in recorded history at least as far as the Greek philosophers. The present name of the phenomenon is derived from the word used by Tibetan monks in the early 20th century. There's also evidence to suggest dedicated prayer can lead to the development of 'religious tulpas' in the minds of the particularly devout, and on the secular end, writing techniques similar to tulpa development techniques can and have resulted in writers creating accidental tulpas from their characters. Having a tulpa is nothing new, although it's gone by many names throughout the course of history and does so even today. However, we believe we are one of the first groups to address this practice as a psychological phenomena rather than a magical, occult or divine experience.

Tulpamancy and Attention

There was another passage from the book that I found noteworthy.

At the end, Stanford describes what truly sustains Bill isn't power, but attention, which Stanford describes as Bill's "lifeblood."

It's even underlined for emphasis.

Why is this important? Well first, this line goes back to the weird lines earlier suggesting Bill is an idea.

But more importantly, feeding on attention is something which is actually a pretty popular philosophy in tulpamancy. That tulpas feed on and are sustained by the attention of their hosts.

How do I give my tulpa energy? Tulpas are sustained by attention, and energy is a convenient metaphor for this. So, you can give your tulpa energy by interacting with them. It is also possible, through no shortage of work and time on the part of host and tulpa alike, for a tulpa to grow beyond this need and to learn how to sustain themselves.

How much attention/energy/interaction does my tulpa need? During the creation process you should aim to interact with your tulpa daily, anywhere from a few minutes up to a few hours, and narrating to them as and when you can. After they're fully vocal and active, the bare minimum is just acknowledging their existence, but spending time talking to them and interacting with them is very much the point of bringing them into existence. Just don't ignore them, and you'll both be fine.

On Parallels in Writing

Adding another layer, it's likely that Stanford Pines is at least partially based on Alex Hirsch himself.

One point of trivia is that Alex Hirsch has a twin sister, and Gravity Falls was inspired by vacations they would take as children. Dipper and Mabel being based on Alex and his sister is pretty well-known. But towards the end of season 2, it's revealed that their Grunkle Stan is a twin himself, with his brother being Stanford Pines, the author of the journals.

During this part of the story, it starts creating a parallel between the relationships of the younger and older twins, with Dipper (who is based on Alex) bonding with Stanford over how much they have in common. Both are nerds who are into writing and science and uncovering the mysteries of the world. Both are a bit socially awkward as well.

And while not much attention is drawn to this particular connection, both had experiences of making deals with Bill that let Bill takeover their bodies at different points.

Based on the parallels between Dipper and Stanford, one might speculate that Alex based Dipper on his younger self, while Stanford was loosely based on himself as an adult.

The personalities of these two characters are also the most likely to create a tulpa based on the psychological profiles of most tulpamancers.

In 2016, Dr. Samuel Veissiere, a psychiatry professor at McGill University, found the following in his study of tulpamancers:

From coding of qualitative interviews collected in large surveys, the most common tulpamancer profile to emerge is one of a highly cerebral, imaginative, highly articulate, upper-middle class, formally educated person with many consistently pursued interests, talents, and hobbies, but limited channels of physical social interaction. Typical tulpamancers are confident about their talents, but are quite modest and socially shy. They possess – or have cultivated – a high propensity for concentration, absorption, hypnotisability, and non-psychotic sensory hallucinations.

The psychological profile of tulpamancers fits both Dipper and Stanford to a t. And many of these same traits could just as easily be true for Alex Hirsch if these characters were meant to be stand-ins for himself.

Is Alex Hirsch trying to tell us that he's plural?

In the end, this is just a theory. And it's one that I feel nervous making because plurality is so deep and personal. That's why I've avoided speculating on the plurality authors in the past. Even when the writing feels so true to the plural experience that it's hard to imagine that someone who isn't plural wrote it.

So why am I making an exception with this one?

Well, in this particular case, I think that the breadcrumbs are being left intentionally, and if he is plural, then he expects somebody to follow them. I'm not worried that I would be outing somebody who didn't want others to find out.

With Alex Hirsch's love of codes and clues and mysteries, if he were plural, I have to imagine that the hints weren't accidental and he would be wondering if anybody would follow them.

And if I am completely off base and he's not plural, I think that he would still appreciate the theorizing anyway. 🤷‍♀️

But if these are intentional clues that were left behind to hint at a real life plurality, one might ask why.

Why would he want people to know about it, and hint at it in this way?

Well, I think the Book of Bill might have an answer to that too.

Shame is a powerful emotion. But it grows in the dark. The more I've tried to hide my past with Bill, the more hold it's had over me.

Perhaps this line is meant to reflect Alex Hirsch's own feelings. Because many plural systems have felt this same way about their plurality, having hide their relationships to their headmates.

The actual end now

Finally, we come to the real ending of this.

This is, again, just a theory. I don't want anyone taking it as fact. I admit that I could be completely wrong about everything that I've said here.

But if nothing else, it's at least fun to imagine that Alex Hirsch does have a Bill Cipher tulpa in his head that has been acting as his muse this whole time. And it would give a new meaning to the gag of the Weirdmageddon intro saying Gravity Falls was "created by Bill Cipher" all those years ago.

Thanks for reading, and if you have your own muse that you think might be more than a simple muse, be sure to read my guide on how to know if your imaginary friend is sentient.

And if you like this post and want to see more like it, you may want to check out The Plurality of… Avatar: The Last Airbender or The Plurality of… IF

[juniperdugong]

Be my first? - Wonwoo

WC: 824 || Genre: Fluff || CW: Some swears, despite the title, there is only a smidgen of suggestiveness || Wonwoo x fem!reader (established relationship)

A/N: This is a quick little thang that could be (very much insinuated to be) a pt.2 to this lovely fic that's gotten so much love

"How do you like it, baby?"

Wonwoo wrapped his arms around your waist pulling you onto his lap. Resting his chin on your shoulder as he watched you in amusement.

"How do I like it? I don't just like it, I fucking love it, Nonu!" You quickly turned around to meet him face to face. The goofy smile adorning your lips makes him sit tall and proud knowing that he's the one who's made you like this.

You pepper his face in light kisses as you fumble with the box. You've long discarded the gift bag at this point and Wonwoo sighs knowing that he's gonna have to pick it up later because you'll inevitably forget to clean your mess. He just enjoys being showered in your physical praise for the moment, pushing all other thoughts to the side.

Finally, you get it open. Your face gleaming with joy as you hold your new treasure. Excitedly you dart between your present and Wonwoo's face, like a puppy asking for permission from its owner to run around the park full speed. He nodded gently and you were off to the races!

The Instax mini evo instant film - a beauty of a modern film camera that you've eyed since its release.

To be honest you weren't as into film and photography as Wonwoo but you always admired the look of some of the older analog film cameras he had. You expressed a slight desire to get into the hobby but only if you could do it digitally... the only thing stopping you? You absolutely hated the way modern cameras looked. Of course, the aesthetic shouldn't matter when it comes to equipment but it mattered to you just enough to not commit to photography, although you'd never admit it.

But with the Instax mini, you could basically say FujiFilm read your mind and came out with the perfect product for you to fulfill your oh-so-selfish desire of looking like someone who knows their way around a camera. All of this of course to impress your handsome nerd of a boyfriend, Jeon Wonwoo.

"Be my first?" He looked at you quizzically before scanning his own body with his eyes, "Baby, we've already-"

"No, you ass. I meant let's take the first picture together..." You hit him on the chest lightly before skimming over the manual for a gist of how everything worked. He gave a small chuckle and a light peck to your cheek, relaxing into your shoulder once again. "Sure, pretty girl. I'd love to be the first."

Once you're sure you've got down the basics you raise the camera above your heads, making sure your angle is perfect. "You better smile very prettily for this, Jeon Wonwoo." you say through gritted teeth as you hold "the perfect poised smile".

"Of course, I won't dissapoint, angel." He tucks your hair behind your ears on the side that he's resting against, puts on his best smile, and reaches up to meet the hand you're using to hold up the camera.

"What are you do-" Before you can get your question out Wonwoo uses his other hand to push your head towards him, catching you in a kiss. His timing is perfect because just as you're about to push him away he snaps the photo.

Immediately he takes the camera from your hands and prints the picture. You stare at him in complete shock at his audacity. "Wonwoo~" You whine as he holds an iron grip on the device you're so desperately trying to get back from him.

"Just a second... and... Got it!" He all but tosses the camera onto your lap as he hastily grabs at the photo once it's printed. The content laugh that comes out of him as he sees the result has you fuming.

"Let me see!" You snatch it from him and cringe at what you see next.

Wonwoo with his perfectly sculpted face, eyes closed gently, leaning in ever so gracefully and meeting you. You who had your eyes wide open in shock and lips pursed out of habit, but they more so resemble duck lips than anything else.

"You should put that in your phone case, baby." With a look of complete and utter dissatisfaction and disgust, you look at your boyfriend, who is thoroughly enjoying your reaction with the biggest smile on his face. You punch his chest, he pretends to be hurt for a second before returning to his state of euphoria.

"Yeah? Since you seem like it so much maybe you should put it in your phonecase." You hold the picture up to his face, a chuckle coming from him as he beholds his masterpiece once more.

"I'm good, I've already got the perfect photo in mine." He flips his phone over and thumbs at the cutout frame of a photo strip, your first kiss. "Plus, it's your first picture with your new camera, cherish it, baby."

A/N: Not proofread!! A little something something because I was in the writing mood~ A question to any fanfic authors who read this, what's your word count per day? Me personally, whether it's a part of a longer fic or not, I average about 1000. This fic was actually written with like an hour and a half. Anyways lovelies, let me know what you think!!!

Please Reblog and Comment (They act as power-ups for me)

Taglist (OPEN): @bemybabiibish @bath1lda @porridgesblog

[whatbigotspost]

Our 2 party system is corrupt and upsetting. I get that the democrat party stays trash AND I’m fucking thrilled and shocked they’re actually shaking things up like never before.

I know Biden has done horrific things AND he actually is commendable for EVENTUALLY listening and making this choice (at the last minute.) Who has ever done similar (hint: no one.)

I understand Kamala is a cop AND I’m still voting for her, no question. Not even flinching.

I understand she is too like Genocide Joe on many many issues that I deeply disagree with AND I’m fucking delighted the republicans entire 2024 election playbook (“our guy is LESS demented and decrepit!!!!”) is now embarrassing irrelevant and easily weaponizable back at them.

I wasn’t gonna watch any fucking debates or really any election anythings, bc what would I possibly learn that would be of any value?

But now I’m absolutely giddy to watch someone who is (no matter what you think of her politics) CLEARLY at the top of her “talking off the cuff” game and she will run verbal circles around the lumbering fool the Christo fascists are propping up as their meat puppet Trojan horse for Project 2025.

I was always going to vote blue nose-hold bc I understand that is one of the very very few levers that is clearly, obviously in front of me that I have within my personal power to pull against fascism.

I’d like elections to still exist. And our elections aren’t perfect, our systems are fucked, I hate parties, I hate the electoral college, I hate SCOTUS and honestly I hate 99% of politicians writ large AND the demoralizing experience that is voting as a leftist in Texas sure just got a lot less deflating and empty feeling.

The republicans really were gonna ride the boost off of a fucking an assassination attempt to the White House and the dems looked like they were really gonna let them…

AND THEN THEY DIDN’T.

It doesn’t change everything but it changes SOMETHING. Everyone else has already said all the great analogies about voting in the US…it’s choosing a bus ticket, not marrying the candidate, yadda yadda yadda. My bigger point here is that things at least are more interesting and less “over before it’s over.”

Abandon all or nothing thinking in your politics. It will serve you very little.

If you’re curious about a very good review of what has happened (as of Sunday), how it’s possible in US electoral structures that the dem nominee can switch like this, this is a helpful, fact-based non-partisan overview.

[fluentmoviequoter]

Fall prompt!!!

I saw this one on another post: holding a ladder steady for the other one when they're trying to put something higher up

I figured could be decorating or getting decorations out?? I pictured our man Tim but would be cute with anyone!

Ah, I love this!! Thank you!🫶🏼🍂 0.8k+ words, fluff.

The smells of sweet pumpkin, mossy birch, and brown sugar greet you warmly as you kick Tim's door closed behind you. You huff as you shift your arms to keep a pillow from falling. With your focus on the bags and goodies stacked precariously in your arms, you don’t notice Tim walk out of the hallway or how his brows draw together as he looks at you.

“What is that?” he asks once you’ve saved the items in your hand from crashing to the floor.

You smile, as guilty as Tim thinks he’s ever seen you, as you shake the cup in your left hand. “A fall-flavoured drink?” you try.

“I figured. What’s the rest of it?”

“Okay, well…” you begin. “Help me set it down and then I’ll tell you?”

Tim’s brows raise as he shakes his head, and you punctuate your request with a “Please, handsome?” that has him crossing the room to transfer bags from your tired arms to the kitchen table.

Tim lifts a package of fake spiderwebs and repeats, “What is all this?”

“As you know, I went to get Kojo more food,” you begin. “But I went to a different store than usual, and when I walked in, they had all of the fall and Halloween decorations on display.”

“So, you bought them all?” Tim challenges, his eyes wide.

“No! Just enough to make this place look like someone actually lives here.”

“I thought ghost houses were cool in October,” Tim murmurs, peeking into one of the bags.

“Angela and Wesley give out full-sized candy bars on Halloween, and you take real spiderwebs down. Don’t use a ghost analogy to get out of this, Tim.”

Tim shakes his head at your passion for something as silly as decorating for fall. But he loves you, and you love this. Besides, he already lit the candle you got him. There's no going back at this point, he supposes.

“Where do we start?” he asks with a sigh.

You clap your hands together and smile as you answer. “Outside. Can you go get the ladder?”

“Reduced to an errand boy,” Tim grumbles as he turns away from you.

“Thank you!” you call after him. “I love you!”

“Okay,” you announce, rising from your squatted position after preparing the spiderwebs across Tim’s lawn. “Now we just use the hooks to secure them to the gutter.”

You step toward the ladder, and Tim catches your wrist before he shakes his head firmly.

“You hold the ladder, I’ll go up,” he says.

Nodding, you hand one end of the web to Tim before you step to his side and hold the ladder steady. Once he’s up, you move one step to your left to stand slightly behind him.

“Here?” he asks, raising the web where you said you wanted it.

“Perfect!” you reply, tightening your grip on the ladder. “Be careful.”

Tim doesn’t answer as he leans forward and secures the removable hook to his roofline. Once the web is hanging, he attaches another hook further down.

“Careful,” you warn again.

“Oh, the spiderwebs are cool but me turning into a zombie is a problem?” he jokes.

You fight to contain your laugh, but a giggle slips before you answer, “Seriously, Tim, don’t fall.”

He looks over his shoulder, smiles, and says, “You’ve got me.”

Curling your fingers tighter around the metal ladder, you nod. “Thanks for helping me. And agreeing to let me decorate your house.”

Tim steps off the ladder and lays his hands on your shoulders, brushing your hair away from your face. He leans toward you, then says, “Please don’t tell me you got one of those RIP headstones.”

“Ugh, no!” you exclaim. “We’re leaving the gaudy decorations to the house down the streets that gives out apple slices.”

Tim shakes his head, then kisses your forehead and steps back. “What next?”

“The flying bats. Oh, I forgot, I also have a few spiders to go on the webs, too.”

“Go grab the spiders and the pumpkins for the walkway,” Tim encourages.

After you return with more decorations, Tim climbs onto the ladder again, and you hold it as you watch him with nothing but gratitude, love, and admiration. Looking down quickly, you get an idea. With one hand still on the ladder, you grab a decoration you bought strictly to mess with Tim.

“Here, let me give you a hand,” you say.

Tim reaches down and takes your offered decoration without question. When he raises it and sees the prop severed hand, he exhales and asks, “Do you want me to jump off the ladder?”

He looks down at you, unable to keep his smile from growing to match yours.

“Who would watch all the fall football games with me then?” you question.

“It looks perfect,” you say, leaning against Tim’s side as you survey the beautiful mix of Halloween and fall decorations.

“You did good,” Tim replies, wrapping his arm around you.

“You did the heavy lifting.”

“And you held the ladder.”

You nod before Tim tilts his chin to kiss you. You’ll always be there for one another, even if it’s just holding a ladder.

[yanderes-galore]

Then Yuji with your prompts 3,8, and 29

Sure, didn't have many plot ideas so here's Analog AU! Yuji pulling a KinitoPet since I wanted to explore that more. Sorry it came out a bit short ^^;

Analog AU Here!

Yandere! Yuji Itadori Prompts 3, 8, 29

(Analog AU)

"You'll love me, even if we have to sit and wait for it to happen."

"I could look into those eyes forever...."

"I want to be this close... forever...."

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Kidnapping, Isolation, Yuji is not technically Yuji, Brainwashing/Mind control implied, Possessive behavior, Jealousy, Forced affection, Forced relationship.

"Isn't it nice when everything is perfect?"

Your new life was difficult to get used to. In fact, you have no idea how long you've been imprisoned here. Time could very well work differently here.

All you recall is buying that strange DVD... meeting Yuji... and now you're here in a world resembling the show you loved so dearly.

At least you still managed to keep lucid enough to know this isn't your home. The entity puppeteering this realm could try their hardest to adapt you to this place... but you know better. This is not home.

This will never be home.

Yuji never gave up on making you feel like you belong in his realm. He made you a Jujutsu Sorcerer, he uses other characters to give you friends, he even took the identity of the main character you adore so much! Yuji yearns to please.

So why do you ignore him?

This place never fails to feel... uncanny? You know none of this is real. The other characters don't seem sentient and you can't seem to get Yuji's faint red glow in his eyes out of your head.

You and Yuji are the only people seemingly real in this world. Even if you speak to other characters, Yuji's always close by to watch you. You aren't sure what he is... but he seems awfully determined to make this world a paradise for you.

"Your world is so full of stress..." Yuji would say, looking disappointed. "But here? Here anything can happen. You can be happy... I can make you happy."

Yuji acts like a god in this realm. A god who's using your favorite show to gain your approval. However... you haven't allowed yourself to give in.

You can't let your guard down around those glowing eyes....

"The apartment looks close enough to your old home, yes?" Yuji asks you excitedly, rearranging furniture with ease. You blankly watch him, the familiarity only making you wish for home more. Were you technically dead?

"I just hope you know I do this because I care..." Yuji whispers, sitting on the bed to look at you. "It was so upsetting to see you so bored and stressed after work before. But... this is fun, isn't it?"

Ah, yes... was playing pretend with some entity fun? Was this meant to be more relaxing? Why does he bother acting like he cares?

"Why won't you let me out?" You ask, Yuji looking at you confused.

"Let you out...?" He echoes, seeming hurt. "That isn't how things are supposed to go...!"

"I never wanted to be here!" You plead. "Nothing's real... It's all fake..."

"I'll work on it more for you!" Yuji smiles, his eyes gleaming red again. "Anything for you, right...?"

"What do you even want from me!?" You plead to Yuji, the entity watching you with a frown.

"You... You don't understand...?" Yuji whispers, concerned about your confusion. "Seriously?"

Your adrenaline creeps in when Yuji stands up, stepping closer. There's no point running. He always knows where you are....

"I made this world for you, sweetheart... for us!" Yuji whispers, a smile on his face. "I did it because I love you...!"

Your breath hitches when Yuji leans closer, uncanny eyes staring into your own. The effect is almost... entrancing. You go to look away, to fight him more on his words...

Yet you can't.

"I could look into those eyes forever...." Yuji whispers, holding your face. He grins, gaze flicking from your eyes to your lips. You want to tell him he doesn't know what love is...

But he cuts you off.

"You see... if you accept this new world I made for you... we can have more moments like this..." Yuji whispers, teasingly kissing your lips as you gaze into his eyes. Why can't you look away?

"I love you so much... I was so tired of just watching you through that damn screen..." Yuji murmurs breathlessly. His grip tightens, gaze becoming a glare for a moment. "I didn't want to share you with anyone... but now..."

Yuji pulls you into a tight embrace. His hold is crushing, possessive. That manages to snap you out of your trance a little bit, just enough to push against his chest and struggle.

"I want to be this close... forever...." Yuji whispers with a grin, eyes holding a lovesick gaze towards you. He leans in to kiss you again, only for you to harshly shove him back. His expression then becomes unamused before he perks back up again with a smile.

"Oh, baby... am I coming off too strong?" Yuji frowns, feigning guilt. "I'm sorry... I forgot I need to be patient with you. I'm just getting a bit too... excited due to you being here now...!"

Yuji steps back, gaze softening with an uncanny glow to it. He gives you space before continuing to redecorate. He's getting too eager.

"That's okay, you may not understand it now but..." Yuji whispers, looking at the room before his eyes trail back to you. You freeze when you see them flash an entrancing red again. "You'll love me, even if we have to sit and wait for it to happen."

With that, Yuji continues rearranging your new home. An uneasy feeling swirls in your gut at the experience. You'd never know what Yuji is... or his true intentions.

But as your fictional life treks on, your fears slowly don't matter anymore...

Why bother fighting him when there's nowhere to go now? Maybe you should just be loved...?

After all... it's just you and Yuji... together forever in a world made for you.

[koqabear]

ugh FINE i’ll give you guys another spoiler scene for psycho rich kid beomgyu 😒😒 fine!!!! since literally everyoneeee is asking for it !!!!! (do you guys still remember this fic.)

sfw, unedited

Beomgyu gave you twenty minutes. 

He knows better than to have high expectations for you; it's a foreign, overwhelming experience, with watchful eyes in every corner and reputations at stake. He’s always thought the Huening’s foyer was over the top— tacky, really, an arrogant display of wealth that only serves to intimidate newcomers. 

The catering choices for this year however, have improved. Beomgyu has found that he prefers the palette selected this time around, remembering the foods that had him grimacing and holding back a gag last year— when his mother ushers him to accept a caterer’s offer, he doesn’t feel as apprehensive to obey. It’s a small food that’s easy to pop in his mouth, and Beomgyu takes this moment to sneak a glance at the analog watch on his wrist, much too heavy for his liking. Five minutes have passed. 

Your head must be spinning; your stomach must be tied up into a complex rollercoaster. He allows his mother to place a heavy hand on his shoulder, bringing him into her side as a display of affection. Briefly, he recognizes Mr. and Mrs. Jang, their daughter beaming prettily between them— her eyes have a glassy, empty look to them, ruby lips stretched into a permanent smile. She doesn’t speak once in the conversation that’s all about her. 

Beomgyu’s eyes begin to wander, looking up at the chandeliers and the winding stairs that lead to the second floor; he observes the rest of the patrons around him, dressed in formal gowns and pristine tuxedos— everything is polished to perfection, from the floor beneath him to the pleasant smiles the people around him exchange. Looking at this must be suffocating you. 

Ten minutes. Ten minutes should be enough for you to gather your courage and come to him, right? You must be pacing in circles right now, watching from a distance and unable to cross the boundary that separates you— he thinks of the back entrance the you’ve been taken to, the gaping doorway behind him, and goes to sneak a glance over his shoulder, a quick look just to see if you’re there—

His mother’s nails bite through the thick material of his blazer and dig into his skin, stiletto points that burrow into his tender flesh. Beomgyu masks the wince of his body for a smile that he gives to Mrs. Jang, catching her eyes as he listens to her compliment him, an exchange that goes back and forth between her and his mother. 

Fifteen minutes. What’s going through your mind right now? Have you found complacency in the back tables with mediocre store-bought desserts the employees brought for each other? His parents have wandered off to the dance floor, bumping into the Huenings and talking animatedly, as though they were having the most interesting conversation on earth. He worries that his mothers face might rip open from the strain of her smile— Beomgyu doesn’t remember the last time his father laughed so loudly. 

Twenty minutes. He’s been dumped off with the Jang’s daughter, a robotic girl that can only muster small talk and ask superficial questions, round eyes absorbing the light around them and plump lips stretching to show a perfect, pearly smile. 

Are you enjoying the party so far? 

Beomgyu merely glances at her before he’s back to observing his surroundings, wondering if you’re just lost in the crowd. He looks over at the catering table, with towers of pastries, expecting to find you gawking at the magnificent display. 

It’s empty and untouched. 

“It’d be better if the music they played wasn’t trying to put me to sleep,” he remarks, unsure if he can take another classical piece droning on in the background. 

Her eyes light up and she laughs; a delicate sound, like windchimes moved about by the wind. Beomgyu wonders if he should be endeared by the noise. 

Twenty-five minutes. Thirty. Forty. 

Beomgyu feels a pressure behind his eyes, incessant and just as uncomfortable as the stiff suit that’s beginning to drive him mad— it’s stuffy in this corner he’s found himself in, the Jang’s daughter— Wonyoung, he remembers— continuing to cling to him despite his insistence that she doesn’t have to. Three failed attempts to shake her off and she’s still glued to his side. 

“I have to go to the bathroom,” he murmurs, looking around the vast foyer and to the back entrance, where you must still be— when he takes a step back, Wonyoung takes one forward. 

“I’ll go with you,” she smiles, her voice sweet and song-like. Beomgyu shakes his head at her offer, pressing his lips together before he finds the right words to say.

“It’s alright. Really,” he reassures, glimpsing over at his parents, still distracted by the Huenings, then scanning the room for the Jang’s— when he confirms that both have been consumed by other matters, he turns around to send Wonyoung a stern look. “Neither of our parents are paying us any mind now.

“Please excuse me,” he says, uncaring of the way Wonyoung tries to open her mouth to speak, “I have more important things to tend to.”

His steps hasten the further he gets from her— ducking his head to ensure he doesn’t make eye-contact with anyone, his parents least of all. It’s only when he’s escaped the public and stepped into the back hall that he finds a weight slipping off his body. 

He stands at the doorway, a blank expression on his face as he begins to scan his surroundings; it’s a quiet, dull place, with workers and cooks coming and going from various places, carrying dirty dishes or a new pretty plate with delicacies to hand out— he watches the commotion from a distance, scanning through bodies in search of your anxious face. A cook, a maid, a caterer that stares down at their dirtied shirt with disdain and quiet curses— but no you. 

If anyone spots the boy amidst all the chaos, wandering around places he shouldn’t be, no one bothers to point it out— they’d rather not cause any potential problems, anyways. Beomgyu can feel the glances spared to him, the confusion in their eyes before they’re going back to work; he peeks his head curiously in every room he can, opening every door he finds. 

When he realizes you’re nowhere to be found, a strange sensation begins to bubble inside him. 

It starts in his stomach; a heavy pang, a sinking sensation that ebbs into the rest of his torso, speeding his heart rate and pumping adrenaline into his veins. His hands begin to tremble, and he finds himself oddly haste to check any room he hasn’t yet, or double check any he has— his legs feel like jelly, his hurried steps reminiscent of a deer learning to walk; he thinks he might just trip over his own feet if he isn’t careful enough. 

Where have you gone? Where could you have possibly gone? Beomgyu has triple checked the employee area— you’re not there. Not in the closets, not in the bathrooms, not in the corners in the back of the rooms. 

He steps out to the hall, and turns to the only option left; the hallway is far from the main event and strictly off limits to anyone that’s not the Huenings. You wouldn’t, he thinks to himself, eyes narrowing at the portraits that seem to glare down at him, you’d never. 

From the distance, he sees someone approaching: a boy seemingly younger than him, with dark hair and bangs that have been neatly swept away from his face— his face is twisted into a stressed expression, eyes darting back and forth as though in search of something; it is only when he’s a few feet away from Beomgyu that the boy seems to spot him.

A myriad of emotions seems to flash through his eyes— panic, concern, worry— only to settle on a curiosity that swims in the deep, brown irises, like honey that threatens to trap Beomgyu in. He watches as the younger wrings his hands absentmindedly, hidden beneath the sleeves of his suit— Beomgyu remembers him as Hueningkai.

“You’re… son of the Choi family,” he begins, gulping nervously and scanning the said boy’s appearance, “right?”

“Choi Beomgyu.” is all he cares to respond, too impatient to deal with any distractions.

Looking over the younger’s shoulder, he continues to gaze down the hall, as though searching for any movement. Hueningkai hesitates before he speaks again. 

“Choi Beomgyu…” Hueningkai murmurs, the formality of his tone causing Beomgyu’s gaze to snap back down to him.

“I need your help.”

[vpgoldenrod]

Aziraphale's Haunted Look: On Being Forcibly Outed and Exiled From The Garden

While we're all talking about Aziraphale's reaction to the kiss, I'm surprised by those who thought Aziraphale looked disgusted because that's not an emotion I'd seen in him at all. There's sadness, and confusion, and anger, but I couldn't remember seeing disgust. When I watched the scene again I realized there's something else going on that really struck a chord with me. It's an uncomfortably familiar look.

He feels exposed. And I know what it feels like to be exposed in such a violent and intimate way.

Stay with me, I promise this is relevant to my analysis.

I didn't know what being transgender meant when I was a kid. Being raised in a fundamentalist Christian house meant that I wasn't exposed to those ideas, so I lived my life feeling like something was always just kind of broken. It was like I was looking right through the problem at other things, trying to alleviate symptoms without understanding why they existed in the first place. I eventually met other trans people, who gently nudged me in the direction of my truth. I even became aware that I had experienced some minor dysphoria. Every time I came close to acknowledging the truth however, my eyes would once again begin to glaze over the problem. I always managed to subconsciously shove it back into a little box and move on with my life. It was like I accidentally “did a big miracle” and hid this truth from myself so well that I continually forgot it was there.

Til one day I had an encounter that changed everything.

We're friends now but oddly enough, it was only meant to be a fling. I won't go into too many details because it's not just my story, but it was a lovely time that culminated with us meeting and doing what adults do. The person I was with, a cis man, silently clocked me the minute we were face to face. For reasons I now understand, without warning and in the middle of our shared intimate experience, he decided to talk dirty to me as if I were a gay man.

No one had ever spoken to me like that before. It had never occurred to me to ask anyone to do that, or that anyone would want to. I was in an intimate space and filled with the typical emotions and endorphins one has during sex, but it was a fling. I had walls up. So for the first time in my life, in this incredibly vulnerable position, someone grabbed me by my lapels and forced me to face a deep truth about myself that I'd spent decades silently dancing around. It was a blunt, irrefutable truth and it hit like a sucker punch to the solar plexus. He saw me when I was very much not trying to be seen, and there's few things more terrifying than that.

Even now, years later, I have such a hard time putting into words the overwhelming emotions I felt that night. There were so many, and yet somehow I can see every single one of the emotions I felt in Aziraphale's face when Crowley lets him go. My heart breaks all over again seeing how exposed he felt. He can barely make eye contact until he stumbles onto the one emotion that gives him his agency back: anger.

Gabriel shows up to the bookshop completely naked. When a bewildered Aziraphale points it out Gabriel says, “Who told you I was naked?”

But that's not how the story goes.

God looks for Adam in the garden, but he hides from her. He eventually tells God, “I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid myself.”

Then God asks Adam, “Who told you you were naked?” And of course Adam knows he is naked because he ate the apple.

I've made jokes about Crowley being the apple that bit Aziraphale, but I forgot the bit that happens afterwards. He is aware of his own nakedness. He is exposed. To God, to Crowley, and to himself. As a result he is exiled from the safety of his Eden. Man, if this isn't the perfect analogy for being forcibly outed I don't know what is.

This show is so gay you guys.

[sethcertified]

「 KNIVES OUT ! 」 . . . 📁 01

scream : billy loomis, stu macher

w.c. : 2.5k

⊹˚.⋆ synopsis . . . it was just another night til [name] got those two very odd calls

⊹˚.⋆ starring . . . billy loomis, stu macher, & male reader

The night had taken over Woodsboro, California. An unfamiliar blue breeze had swept through as the sun ducked down behind buildings and night emerged from the suns departure; a tiny golden blaze of warmth and light on the horizon marking the rebirth of a perfect night from the sun's ashes. On any other night, I would've been tucked into bed with a song blaring into my ear drums, surely destroying my hearing, but today was Monday, which meant that I had the displeasure of closing up the video store for the night.

Despite my lack of enjoyment in being there, it was mine turn, fair and square. Randy had closed yesterday, so it was rightfully my duty to clean the shop and lock it up until the following day when we would open back up for business. That was the mantra I had repeated to myself as I dusted the shelves and the many dvds that were placed against each other like dominos that occupied the space. It was a dreadfully boring task, but I needed the money, so I made due.

A yawn escaped my mouth as I finished up the sci-fi section. My eyes flickered up to the ticking analog clock above the entrance doors. The clocks hands pointed to a quarter past twelve. My cheeks puffed out as I blew a frustrated mouthful of air into the atmosphere. I'd have no time to finish Randy's pre-calculus homework and be able to deliver it to him before first period. I cursed under my breath at the realization. Hopefully he would be fine with me giving it to him after school.

I blinked tiredly as I stumbled towards the reception desk, dropping the duster off at desk's newly wiped down countertop. All I had to do now was check the register; my last task before I could go home and flop into my bed. Opening the register, my fingers agilely sorted through the money. I spoke in a hushed voice, counting how much we had made the previous day. As the dollars increased in price, my sorting got slower and slower 'til I arrived to see the crisps $20 and $50 bills that occupied the bottom of the stack. All of it put together was more than I made in a week.

I bit my lip as my hand clutched an $100 bill that rested at the very bottom of the pile. Rent was coming up soon, and I knew we wouldn't have enough unless a miracle happened. This could be that extra push that my family so desperately needed so we didn't end up on the streets. My eyes scanned the store, making sure nobody could witness my thievery. Luckily, we had no cameras, so my crime would go unnoticed. I stuffed the money into my jacket pocket before shutting the register shut. My eyes shut as I exhaled a breath of relief. The money burned in my pocket. Guilt chewed at me but I just shook the feeling away. We needed this. I needed this.

With that being my final task of the night, I moved into the break room to grab my stuff. My backpack laid pressed up against the wall alongside my packed lunch. I leaned down as I slid the sleeves around my arms, putting my backpack on. I grabbed my lunch pal before brushing the dust off my clothes. It was finally time to go home. My hand wrapped around the cool metal of the door handle before being rudely interrupted.

"RI-I-ING!"

...

"RI-I-NG!"

The clattering of the phone echoed in the empty store, startling me. Who would be calling at this time of night? I sighed as I closed the door to the break room and made my way to the still ringing phone. It shone under the light that streamed from the window, its red coat looking as beautiful as ever. My fingers wrapped around the phone as I brought it up to my ear. "Hello?"

"Hello." The assumed man replied from the other side of the phone; his voice not hinting any emotion. Despite that, I didn't mind the monotone inflection in his voice as a yawn escaped past my lips. "Is there any reason you're calling so late? We're closed, you know."

"Why do you think I'm calling?" The man answered with the same monotonous tone as before. My eyes squinted with confusion at the question. I had gotten weird calls before but never ones so vague. To be frank, it annoyed me. "To buy a movie?" I remarked sarcastically. "Call back during store hours, asshole."

"Such vulgar language," the man laughed, finally leaving behind his monotone cadence, "I should wash that mouth of yours with soap."

I rolled my eyes, "You're gonna spank me too?" My voice had gotten higher in pitch and whiny as I mocked the man by mimicking the tone of a child. A hum escaped the other line in an endless reply to my tease. As the hum continued on, I checked the analog clock once more as my patience wore thin. 12:20. My attention darted back to the phone as I stood waiting for the man to say anything in return. With nothing but the now dreadful sound of a hum escaping the line, I slammed the phone back into its rightful place.

"Dick," I mumbled as my had flattened on the cool surface of the entrance doors. What a way to make my night worse. I shook my head as the heel of my shoe clicked against the solid concrete of the sidewalk. Walking alone at night usually never unnerved me, but something in the air made my muscles tense in fear. My mind trailed back to the call, yet I immediately disregarded it. It was just some teenager trying to mess around with an overworked employee such as myself.

Maybe it was something in the atmosphere that unnerved me so, I reasoned. I wasn't sure what exactly, but tonight felt different from most nights here in Woodsboro, California. The air wasn't as suffocating, for one. Usually the air would be so thick it seemed to stick your to your body, yet I didn't feel any of that thickness tonight. In fact, I felt a slight chill.

My hands dug into my pockets, trying their best to a avoid the nighttime cold that swept through the area. The money laid in the palm of my hand, providing me some warmth. I looked up to see the night sky shining down on me. Stars lit up my way home, providing me a companion on my walk. My gaze darted back down as slight tears welled up in the corners of my eyes. "Not now," I mumbled. I quickly wiped away the singular tear the fell down my cheek.

As much as I hated to admit it, crying had begun a frequent habit of mine. I only allowed a few tears to slip out when I was alone, but my solitude didn't diminish my shame for being such a wimp. I crinkled my nose as I sniffled a bit trying to keep my composure intact. When I was younger and my calm composure would fall, Cotton or my mom would comfort me. But now, neither of those were options. Cotton was in jail and would be for the rest of his life. And my mom? She had become a shell of herself after Cotton's arrest. She wouldn't move or talk or do anything anymore. In truth, she was a living corpse. Bony face, bloodshot eyes, sluggish movements. The only difference between her and an actual corpse is the few times she would moan out "Cigarette" to me.

It was impossible to ignore the resentment that had built up towards my mother. She had abandoned me, yet forced upon the responsibility of taking care of her onto me all at once. I gritted my teeth as I kicked a decently sized rock. If Cotton was still here, Mom wouldn't have become this zombie. She would still be her regular self. Not this dead version of her. Another tear slipped down my cheek. It burned against skin.

Cotton should be here. Everything would be just fine if he was. Our family wouldn't be shunned, I'd have my big brother back: we'd be just like any other family in Woodsboro. I bit my lip as I looked up to the sky once more. Cotton's last words to me echoed in my head, "When you miss me, just know I'm not lightyears away." He had flashed me a grin so bittersweet before the guards dragged him away. They had yanked on his handcuffs roughly, motioning for him to start backing away. His eyes widened in panic at the feeling.  "I love you, [Name]. Tell mom I love her too." He said quickly before he was taken away. It had happened too fast for my sixteen year old brain to follow. He was there one moment, and then he wasn't.

I shook off the memory as I reached my front door. I didn't bother knocking as I unlocked the door. My mother wasn't in sight, causing my shoulders to drop with relief. I hurried to Cotton's and I shared room, jumping out the rickety, old mattress. The springs poked me, but I payed no mind. Being in a bed was enough for me to be satisfied. I groaned as I turned over onto my back. The ceiling had a couple stains, and the cracks in the corners were getting worse. "We gotta get that fixed," I mumbled although I knew better. We wouldn't be able to afford it.

My eyes closed in frustration. There was too many things to fix but never enough money. I sighed as my hand dug into my pocket. $100 dollars wasn't enough to fix any of our problems. It was a penny when we needed a quarter. A hundred quarters, actually. I shoved myself off my bed as I headed to the kitchen. It was too depressing to be in there alone with the leaky and cracked ceiling. But worst of all, the hints of Cotton that still haunted the room. All his possessions still laid untouched with the exception of his clothes. None of my old ones fit anymore but we couldn't afford a whole new wardrobe simply because I had a growth spurt. His action figures collected dust on the shelf above his bed, his bed was as messy as always, Cotton never took the time to make his bed,

The kitchen was lightly dimly by the small, slightly flickering light above the dining table. My index finger delicately traced the cool edge of the countertop, mindlessly, as I reached for the case of red, plastic cups that laid by the phone. I prayed water would settle my restless mind. The sink gradually filled the cup to the brim with the liquid that would hopefully quench my ranging emotions.

Bringing the cup to my lips, my gaze turned to the phone. My mind couldn't help but think about the odd phone call from earlier. What idiot calls at the middle of the night? I set the drink down as my finger ran up and down the spine of the phone. Maybe he was high, I figured. Or drunk. Hell, maybe it was just a teenager goofing around. My lips pursed in the wake of my troubling thought: why was I was bothered? The call didn't mean anything, so why was it lingering in my head?

"RI-I-ING!"

...

"RI-I-NG!"

My eyes squinted harshly at the phone. What the fuck? It was odd to get a phone call this late, let alone multiple, yet the phone continued to ring, reminding me that what I was seeing wasn't a hallucination. To add onto that, the call coming in just as I was thinking about it? This was either a crazy coincidence or something truly freaky was going on. My fingers clutched the phone, giving me a sense of deja vu, as I held it up to my ear. "Who is this?" I asked.

"You don't remember me?" I jerked my hand away as my eyes stared down the phone. It was him. How was it him? I bit my lip as my eyes burned. This couldn't be just a coincidence. There was no way in hell it was. "How'd you get this number?" I interrogated the man. He laughed a strangely familiar but equally as cruel laugh, "Small town."

My nails dug into the countertop at the force of my deafening grip. "This isn't funny, you know. And I swear, if this is you, Randy, I am going to snap your neck tomorrow."

"I'm not Randy." The voice replied laced in smarminess.

"Then who are you?" I asked. My question was by no means friendly. Which in truth, it wasn't meant to be interpreted in any means as friendly. There was a slight pause before that deafening voice answered me once more, "I'm the person that framed your poor, older brother." My grips on the phone loosened as my eyes gazed at the phone with the memory of that fateful courtroom day. Billy. Was this him?

It certainly didn't sound like him. I bit my lip harshly as my mind bounced back and forth. If I responded, would I be giving him exactly what he wanted? But if I did hang up, I would be angering someone dangerous. Before a clever response could leave my mouth, Billy's presumed voice broke out. "Cat got your tongue?"

"Is this who I think it is?" I barked out. I didn't care for the taunts or tease. All I wanted was for this torture to come to an end. Billy Loomis had made my life a hell ever since that courtroom. He painted me as murderous, a freak, someone to avoid. Billy Loomis had a way with words, and with those words he had outcasted me. Made me laughed at, teased, bullied. It was my own personal form of hell.

"Depends. Who do you think I am?"

"Billy," I mumbled under my breath. "Billy Loomis."

"You're gonna have to speak louder than that, or else I won't be able to hear you." The voice replied. I scowled as my knuckles turned white. "I said I'm hanging up on you," I lied. The phone slammed against the kitchen wall as I clutched my head in pain. What was happening? And why now? I shook my head as I head back to my bedroom and flopped into the bed. The smell of Cotton still hung in the room and I inhaled it sharply, trying to wash away any remainders of the odd phone call.

Yet the call remained in my head, smothering me. My fingers clenched the sheet in frustration. There was no way I was getting much sleep tonight so I let myself stay awake, gazing into the blackness of my pillow. All I could do now was pray it was a meaningless prank call, and not the devilish boy that haunted my dreams.

✎ notes . . . slow start, I know, I know, but trust me things will get intense very soon...

©️ sethcertified 2023

[kaleen-art]

Lupin Movie Marathon Analysis #1

The Mystery of Mamo (Lupin VS. The Clone)

Lupin III: The Mystery of Mamo has been a long standing favorite Lupin movie of mine. When I originally watched it, I couldn’t stand it due to its adult content, but since then, I have not only grown to like it, but I think it’s one of my favorite pieces of Lupin media, period. However, it had been a long time since I watched the full movie by myself, so I decided to put on the Blu-ray and watch it again.

Mamo has always been a movie with a lot of complex themes I like to explore, but I noticed something new this time, as well as coming to new conclusions about previous realizations. So join me in my lengthy analysis/report on Mamo, the most insane masterpiece of a film ever made.

At face value Mamo is just a stupid silly Part 2-like romp. Released in 1978, it reflects a trend amongst Lupin media at the time to be closer to the original manga and Masaaki Osumi’s Part 1 work in tone. For this movie, they even got back a significant portion of the early Part 1 staff in order to bring back this grittier, less bubbly Lupin. His characterization here is notably close to the original manga. But where Mamo succeeds (and Part 2 fails, in my opinion) is the fact that there is depth to Lupin’s character. Unlike Part 2 which has very little stakes, we see Lupin pushed to his absolute limit as the film breaks him down as a person. In a way, the movie is a sort of character study on him. But in order to study Lupin as a person, we have to see how the people around him are affected by, and affect him. Primarily, Fujiko Mine.

Fujiko’s characterization in this movie is perfect. This movie captures something I find a majority of Lupin fails to understand. Fujiko is exactly like Lupin. She is just as calculated and manipulative as him, Lupin just has more practical skill in place of where Fujiko utilizes her beauty to get the things she wants. They don’t even listen to their partners in crime (Lupin with Jigen and Goemon, Fujiko with Mamo) as they lust after each other (while secretly planning to deceive them). They are both horrible people, and therefore are made for each other. The movie drives this point home when Lupin even says him and Fujiko are bound together and can’t be separated, to Mamo. But there’s another character Lupin is bound to.

Zenigata, as he usually does, serves as Lupin’s foil. While Mamo is the actual villain of the movie, Zenigata is always there behind Lupin. In a way, he’s kind of a parallel to Fujiko, because he’s the only other one who never leaves Lupin’s side. And as Delaney Jordan denotes in her amazing video essay on Mamo, in Lupin’s subconscious, the only people who appear are Zenigata and Fujiko. They are the only ones who truly stand to challenge him in comparison to his other partners, which is why he subconsciously holds them in such high esteem. To analogize it, Jigen and Goemon are there to catch Lupin when he falls, while Fujiko and Zenigata are the ones who pushed him off.

On the topic of Jigen and Goemon, they are also very important characters to Lupin in this movie, but in a way, they both serve the same plot purpose. They both act as a sort of conscience to Lupin, keeping him in check throughout the movie, and judging his actions. That is up until they leave (which is very unexpected, especially at the time when the movie came out. If you had been watching the weekly Part 2, it was common to hear Jigen and Goemon bitch about Fujiko, but to see them pushed so far to the limit that they abandon Lupin? It was plain unusual to see.) It’s not until they’re both away from Lupin that we get to see the true side of Lupin. One without refrain. And that’s a good thing for him, because that’s the only Lupin that could go against Mamo.

Mamo is a particularly interesting villain because he’s almost like the anti-Lupin. As one of my friends (@curleyclown) described it, Mamo is an unstoppable force to Lupin’s immovable object. While Mamo is constantly growing more and more intelligent and trying to change time itself, Lupin is a stubborn person opposed to change. And that might be Mamo’s most prevalent theme. The main cast’s refusal to change. The characters don’t grow or change as people, they don’t mature, they end the movie the exact same people they were when it started. And though Mamo tried to influence them through his actions, likely knowing Fujiko would pull Lupin, Jigen and Goemon apart, he was unsuccessful because these characters just aren’t capable of growth. Lupin even remarks this himself about Jigen when twice in the movie, once in the beginning and once near the end, he calls Jigen a unchanging classic. Even a line that seems just like a throwaway joke has depth in this film.

Another thing I love is the movie’s emphasis on Lupin’s subconscious. When Mamo enters the mind of Lupin, he’s stunned by Lupin not dreaming, but later on in the film, when Jigen is arguing with Lupin, Lupin says he had his dream stolen from him, and Jigen asks if he's referring to Fujiko. This is genius. The reason Mamo couldn’t see Lupin’s dream was because Mamo had taken it from him. This might be one of my favorite parts in the whole movie.

My favorite part about the theming in the movie though are the biblical parts. Mamo’s claim to be God isn’t just said through dialogue, the movie continually showcases this visually. Behind Mamo in this shot (see first image below paragraph) is Michelangelo’s “The Creation of Man”, which showcases God creating Adam, the first man. Many people have remarked that you can see the silhouette of a brain in the background shapes behind God (see second image below paragraph), and when Mamo reveals his true form at the end of the movie– (see third image below paragraph) Do you see what I’m getting at? It’s brilliant foreshadowing.

Furthermore, Mamo compares him and Fujiko to Adam and Eve many times which, as said in the Streamline dub, makes Lupin the snake.

Overall, The Mystery of Mamo has a really engaging plot with really good character writing and themimg. But it’s not just that I love about Mamo. The art is gorgeous, and in my opinion, is better than Cagliostro. While Cagliostro has smoother animation, Mamo’s limited animation works really well with the manga inspired artstyle, making it more distinctive, and because they saved time and money by using less character animation, they were able to put more into other aspects of the movie. The movie’s camera shots are really well done and always have a really interesting perspective to them. Additionally the meshing-together of live action materials and animation (such as the scene with Fujiko overlaid on top of a ton of breasts) is really unique, especially for its time. My final note is about the scene where Goemon chops Flinch’s head in 3 and the frame literally gets chopped. It is jaw-droppingly awesome and always impresses my friends when I show them the movie.

The music is also really good. It’s nothing too remarkable as a lot of the music is in Part 2, but its placement in the movie is very nice and I especially love some of the timed cues. The music cue in the scene where Lupin clicks on Fujiko’s nipple (that’s a sentence, alright) is hilarious to me. 

Now we get to another really long section. The voice acting. The voice acting in the Japanese version is absolutely fantastic, all the voice actors deliver a really great performance and you can just hear the psychoticness in Yasuo Yamada’s Lupin. Kou Nishimura’s Mamo is very distinctive and very fitting for the character. And of course the rest of the cast, as usual, deliver a great performance. But of course, I can’t mention Mamo and voice acting while not discussing the 4 English dubs.

Toho’s dub’s script is actually quite decent and it’s a competent dub given it was made in 1979 but the voice acting is rough and because it hasn’t been well preserved, the audio quality isn’t great. Overall, it’s a 5/10.

I adore Streamline’s dub. The script is accurate while simultaneously maintaining really good flow. The voice actors are also amazing and I love Bob Bergen’s performance as Lupin, as well as Edie Mirman’s Fujiko. They both have that perfect energy for their characters and I love their performances. Steve Bulen’s Jigen is also great, my friend (@theshmeepking) always describes him as sounding like a “weed dealer”. Ardwight Chamberlain’s Goemon and David Povall’s Zenigata are also fantastic. Overall, my favorite dub of the movie, 9/10. I just wish it maintained Lupin’s line about Fujiko being his dream. 

Manga’s dub is overall forgettable and the script is littered with out of place cursing. It’s an adult movie, sure, but it just feels tonally inappropriate in my opinion. Voice acting is decent, though I find Bill Dufris’s Lupin a little grating. Audio quality is better than Toho but still rough. Overall, I give it a Dyslexic Zenigata/10 (Zenigata actually says he’s dyslexic, I’m not kidding.)

And then we have the ever-popular Geneon dub. I don’t particularly care for the modern Tony Oliver cast, but I will say, their performances in this aren’t bad even if I don’t personally care for the voices. I find Michelle Ruff’s Fujiko a little unfitting for her depiction in Mamo though. My main problem is the script that deviates way too much from the Japanese original and adds in a ton of unfitting jokes. It’s a fine dub if you’re watching the movie as a fun “turn your brain off” romp, but personally, I don’t think it’s a good adaptation of the original Japanese version.

On that note, that’s about all my collected thoughts on The Mystery of Mamo. This is definitely one of my favorite Lupin films, and maybe just films in general. I don’t have much more to say, but overall I give it a solid 9.5/10. I'd like to give a special shoutout to Delaney Jordan, whose video essay on Mamo was a huge inspiration not only for this, but for my passion for Lupin analyses in general. I'd also like to thank @curleyclown and @eva-of-the-sea for reading my WIPs for this essay. And finally, join Cagliostro Central, the Lupin server I co-own. I usually post the WIPs in question there.

I hope you enjoyed reading this ramble-analysis! I’m doing a Lupin movie marathon, so next up is The Castle of Cagliostro! Stay tuned.

[chaotic-neutral-ferret]

i’m screaming over lyrics and the implications. lemme just prepare my fuckin motf essay over here. it’s mostly Whizzvin so be prepared. this is all my interpretation and if you have different thoughts then please share, i love talking falsettos. also sorry for any formatting issues i wrote this on my phone. (analysis after the read more)

ahem. so in Marvin at the Psychiatrist (part one). Marvin when prompted “Do you love him”, he replies with “sorta kinda” and explains further that he sorta needs him but that he makes him smile and feel smart. and then him and Mendel go on for a while.

And then after Mendel’s “Would he kill you?” Marvin seems to contemplate his own feelings and sort of retracts his former statements saying “But I love him, and I need it. If he loved me, I’d concede it”. He admits he does love Whizzer, but he can’t concede to his whims because he doesn’t perceive Whizzer as loving him in return. Which at this point in their relationship makes sense. Marvin despite cheating on Trina desperately wants a wholly committed relationship and Whizzer isn’t quite on the same track.

Whizzer and Marvin in March of the Falsettos love to poke at each other’s insecurities to harm, not just to joke and make each other laugh (as they do in Falsettoland). And this builds to the boiling point in The Chess Game. In which (OBC not Revival), Whizzer reveals that he can in fact beat Marvin at chess after Marvin repeatedly says “Winning is everything to me” (something we know to be at least mildly false) and Whizzer pokes at Marvin’s desire to be enough for him with “Nothing is everything to me. Except sex… And money”.

Marvin’s “need” to win in this is a kind of analogy for their relationship. He needs to win at their relationship, win Whizzer’s affections, win his lifelong fantasy of a perfect family. Whizzer despite never really fully on board with Marvin’s desires finally says no. He doesn’t want to be a housewife or play into Marvin’s fantasy. And Marvin makes the impulsive, but likely logical to him, decision that it’s over and kicks Whizzer out.

Further, in The Games I Play Whizzer describes his feelings for Marvin as love. When he prompts himself directly he has a similar first instinct to Marvin with “Ask me if I love him. It depends on the day”. But later in the song without direct prompting he admits “It hurts not to love him” and “It’s hard (to love him) when part of him is off playing family charades”. He doesn’t want to need Marvin (“Ask me if i need him. Get him out of my way”), but he does love Marvin.

Then in Marvin Hits Trina, Trina and Whizzer call Marvin a maniac, a clown, untrained, uncouth. He’s sweet but mean. And Whizzer leaves off with another direct prompting “Do I love him? No”

Finally in I Never Wanted to Love You, Whizzer says “ I never wanted to love you. I never wanted, til’ death do we two part…How do I start not to love you?” Admitting one last time (in MOTF) that he does love Marvin despite how much he doesn’t want to. And Marvin says he never wanted to love any of them (Trina, Whizzer, Jason, Mendel) even though he does (in his own bizarre ways).

Both Marvin and Whizzer when given direct prompting from themselves or others redirect and avoid admitting their love for each other. But when they contemplate it and speak without a direct line of questioning they have to admit to themselves that they love the other despite their behavior to the contrary.

[kalifornia1025]

The Lion's Mane Pt. 3 (SPOILERS)

Final part notes are here, let’s get to it!

Maude joined Sherlock for rock pooling! 

Sherlock: “She’s rock pooling with me”, aw she certainly is buddy!

Same Mariana, I too would be pointing out all the sea creatures I see 

Maude: “Living in solitude with one another. Dumped in here by the big sea that left them behind”, John: “Uh…it can be difficult to share a flat with somebody” THE WATER-BASED ANALOGIES STRIKE ONCE AGAIN!!

It’s interesting how complex of a situation Maude has put herself in! Her family has secrets that she knows she needs to keep hidden, but she really just wants to figure out how her fiancé died 

The tooth! Sherlock found Harry’s missing tooth (completely normal thing to whip out in a pub Sherlock, SUPER normal)

Balsanna, or ‘death in the soul’ is a really cool phrase to describe the weight an indirect death can have on someone’s mind and soul; you may not have meant for them to die, but you still feel guilty for indirectly killing them

Sherlock: *referring to the listeners* “You are not a priority”, John: *to listeners* “Isn’t he lovely?”, yeah John like a rose with thorns; prickly but lovely

Sherlock’s still on about that submersible, and John is still full on nope-ing on that plan

Aw poor John, why doesn’t anyone wanna hold his hand??

Wow, the Bellamy’s big company secret is revealed! Using growth enhancement chemicals and claiming they’re organic is some shady shit indeed

Bringing in Balsanna is a perfect way to describe this whole situation: the Bellamy family company didn’t directly kill anyone, but their actions still resulted in those deaths

Neat callback to how John is still dealing with that Urea Nitrate fertilizer in his leg!

Sherlock got his submersible!! Poor Mariana is stressing so hard about that fee being paid. Hilarious that Sherlock was so disappointed about not being able to pilot it

The big moment I’ve been waiting for…the reveal…of the LION’S MANE JELLYFISH! Honestly, I think the they did the reveal justice. I felt like I was in the submersible seeing the beautiful scene as well! 

…wow, poor Fitzy. Good on you John for bringing him back home

Aww, now John and Mariana are having their own little moment on the train! And once again John makes fun of Mariana being a Harry Potter nerd (as he should)

Honestly this was a great case! We had the whole gang working together, they got to travel to a small island in Scotland, and there were so many layers to the case that I was intrigued by! I think the podcast itself is getting a lot better about immersive story telling. I’m not gonna say it’s the BEST case (as I imagine there are many more to come) but it was interesting all the way through. I can't wait so hear what they’ll do next…

[watchingblsnowandforever]

Hello!!!! =D

So. We Are ep 13. I don't how they do this, but they keep making every episode better than the last. At this rate, I'll not be able to survive episode 16.

Warning: long post 😊😅 (there will be a smol part 2 because 30 screenshots are definitely not enough.)

We have the Best Parents in BL, but now I present to you: The Best Aunt in BL.

Subtle, Aunt Pui, real subtle. 😭

I get her. She just wants a nice, handsome boyfriend for her nephew. 😌

First of all, the symbolism is hitting me right in the face, but it's also so subtle because no one else knows the whole story, so they wouldn't be able to figure it out.

Secondly. Yes, the red and blue do clash a bit, and it's not the prettiest little painting. But. Not every painting has to be "pretty" or perfect. Just like feelings or emotions in real life. Peem didn't willingly draw over his precious painting because he thought it'd look better; he did it because he wanted it to express his feelings. This also ties into Peem's insecurity at having (apparently) failed at being Phum's comfort zone because see, in the painting it looks like the sea is embracing the roses, or protecting them.

What I'm trying to say, is that what makes art beautiful is not just what you directly see on the canvas/right in front of you. And this applies even to the "pretty" ones. The David is not just famous because it looks very good, but also because of the amount of skill and talent Michelangelo had to be able to create such a thing from a block of marble. (I'm sorry I'm not good at examples or analogies 😭)

Sir. What business do you have, making an expression like that and giving me a heart attack.

If I haven't said this before: find a man who looks at you like Phum (Pond) looks at Peem (Phuwin).

Two sides of the same coin.

Phum still feels guilty (which is very clear from his reaction to what Peem says) about ruining Peem's painting, so he wants to do something to make sure nothing like that ever happens to Peem again.

Peem is long over it (you don't ever forget shit like that, but he has definitely forgiven Phum). He met Phum because of that Incident™, and he has a new, upgraded painting, so this is just a light joke for him. But the moment he sees it's too soon for Phum, he immediately goes to reassure him he's just kidding, and he absolutely does not hold it over Phum.

A simple pinky promise, but how much does it mean to Phum?

He's never had someone to make a pinky promise with; Fang was in a similar situation as him, and Beer knew better to make a promise and have it broken by forces outside his control.

So this, this small, childish gesture means quite a bit to him. (Which is also probably why having broken it hurt him so much.)

And yet Peem, you're smiling so wide while saying that. Almost like *le gasp* you actually like it!

Let's be real here, Peem. You don't mind at all. In fact, you sounded unbearably fond saying this. You were quite literally giggling and kicking your feet. (Which fits my headcanon of him pretty well actually.)

This shot. Just >>>> (actually thinking of making it my header-)

Ma boy never misses a chance 😭👍🏼

And if he doen't get a chance, he makes one and nails that too. <3

SO CUTEE 🥺🫶🏼

Oh the teasing is on.

Pun: I did that 😌

Beer: Idiots in love. Again. *exasperated sigh*

[From this point on, I am extremely sleep deprived, so most comments made will probably (definitely) be forgotten by the time I wake up (I'm going right to sleep after posting this.]

Well, Chain, I'm sorry to be the one telling you this, but Phum moved into Peem's heart like 6 episodes ago.

Well, yeah, but Peem has to act at least a little bit like the tsundere he is, right?

Chain: "Well, can a cupid shoot an arrow at himself?"

Toey: *very telling side-eye*

Q: You really think one flirty line will trigger his half braincell to understand what he didn't in the past however many years? ...go on, I wanna see how this turns out

Pun: *pikachu meme face*

Beer: Oh damn here goes another one, we must be nearing the last episode

Phum: ????

Peem: Don't say anything don't say anything DON'T SAY ANYTHING DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING SAY A SINGLE WORD- (internally: Idiots. They're idiots.)

Ah, I love the sibling energy here. Also, initially I was like nah you're more like Tan. But then I gave it some thought. And had a Realization: he really is the Fang in their relationship, and Q really is the Tan. (I do not have the brainpower to explain rn, but tell me if you want me too, I'll include it in Part 2.)

Phum can't wait. (And neither can Peem, because I didn't see ya denying anything, babe. Instead, you gave him the softest shoulder bump in the history of soft shoulder bumps and that bigass (smitten) smile.

Oh boy this scene.

Right before this, when Peem called Phum immediately after the last brushstroke, I was smiling so hard and giggling like yesss do boyfriend-y things with each other!

Him waiting on the porch: still big smile. Here comes Phum! Ooh are they gonna flirt in the car??

My smile started dimming as the seconds ticked by and no Phum appeared on screen.

Until I finally realized what was happening.

I almost stopped breathing.

And as the scene went on my heart broke a little more with every text and every call, and I was watching that mall scene again. Except it was much much worse this time.

So long story short, I was heartbroken for both of them. Especially when Peem showed up alone with the saddest lost-kitten face ever.

But, at this point I knew Phum must have had something really urgent/unaviodable to miss his meeting with Peem because 1. He really really loves that boy and 2. He was very much looking forward to doing this with Peem.

Unfortunately, I will have to end Part 1 here (please don't kill me), and I'm loathe to end on a sad note, but I promise the next part will be much happier. It will hopefully be posted a little later today.

If you got this far, thank you so much for reading! 😊

Here, have a pudding 🍮

My previous We Are posts.