#it’s nobody’s fault but sometimes it’s mine

[explodinglotion]

it’s raining hard

[charliespringverse]

i think it should be possible to scream without making any noise or disturbing anyone or inviting any questions . just sometimes . as a treat .

[fionnaskyborn]

there's something to be said about the very specific feeling of frailty you feel when you come face to face with just how little you've experienced. twenty-odd years on planet earth and you haven't really watched all that many movies. an unlived life facing an uncertain future. i do not know where to point the finger of blame because i live untethered from my past, floating in the present with no clear point of reference no clear definition of who i am or what happened to me and how i turned out the way i am (fucking. can you guess why five is my favorite game. insert that one lyric from that one modest mouse song.) but you're still here, and you can still learn, and you can catch up, but it still feels like you're a pitiful little nobody looking for excuses trying to explain why you're still new to the whole being alive thing. i've got a good head on my shoulders, though, for all that's worth, so i think i might be fine.

in other news, i watched scarface tonight. it was certainly a movie. don't really understand how the movie made it big, but it did have some damn good music. i mean, i don't know. i'm still learning about the world i live in. maybe it really is as much of a masterpiece as people make it out to be and i'm too dumb to see the reason why it's considered a classic. maybe i'm right. i can't tell at the moment. it's kind of a beggars can't be choosers situation - if you ain't watched that many movies, then you can't really be a good judge of quality. but, oh, well. it's one more movie watched. it's a win because i watched a movie. and i'll watch more movies.

[hurtspideyparker]

Avengers High School AU

based on this post of mine

At a Party:

Clint: Here's a drink Pete

Tony: *takes solo cup from Peter* You idiot, he's underage!

Clint: So are we dipshit

Tony: *Chugs Peter's drink*

Clint: Whatever, I'll get him a lemonade

Tony: *Chugs his own drink*

—

Natasha: Steve I saw Tony heading for the janitor's closet

Steve: Okay?

Natasha: With Clint

Steve, sprinting down the hall: NOT THE TOILET PAPER BARTON

—

Bucky: Would you like to go out sometime?

Natasha: No

Bucky: I respect that. *Turns to Sam* would you like to go out sometime

Sam: Wait—but you just. What the hell man

Bucky: I'll take that as a no. *Turns to Clint* would you like to—

Clint: Fuck yeah

—

Tony: Did you hear about the fire in the chem lab?

Steve: Tony, what did you do

Tony: It wasn't me this time!

Steve: Oh. That's new

Tony: I mean I did text Bruce the calculations, it's not my fault he didn't see the decimal

Steve: Tony!

—

Natasha: And that's why I transferred in the middle of last year

Sam: Isn't that like...a crime

Natasha: Nobody will believe you.

Sam: What? What do you mean by that

Natasha, disappearing into the crowd:

Sam: What do you mean by that?!

—

Peter: Hi Captain!

Steve: You know only the football team calls me that Peter. I'm not your Captain

Peter: Yes sir

Steve: I'm only 2 years older than you, you don't need to call me sir either

Peter: Okay Captain!

Steve: No just...whatever

—

Tony: Hey Bruce whatcha reading

Bruce: AH! Oh hey dude

Tony: Wow you're jumpy. You need to relax

Bruce: I don't think I've relaxed once since I met you but thanks for the advice

—

Clint: Do you think Thor was held back?

Sam: Naw man, he's pretty smart

Clint: But he looks like he has a 401k and a mortgage

Bucky: Talks like it too

Sam: Maybe it's a Europe thing, school is different there

Clint: Maybe. Hey Thor! What's up buddy, how's the wife and kids?

Thor: Ay? Um...well? And yours my friend?

Clint: Fantastic! Well it was good seeing you

Thor: Alright then, farewell

Sam: What an odd guy

Bucky: Nice though

Clint: Real nice dude

—

Pepper: Tony, stop flirting with me to make Steve jealous

Tony: Whaaaaat, I would never

Pepper: You very loudly told your table, which is right next to mine, "I'm going to go flirt with Pepper to make Steve jealous"

Tony: Well do you think it's working?

Steve, at Tony's table: No

—

Peter: The decathlon supervisor is already one of my references, and I tutor for Mrs. Warren's freshman class a lot so I have her too. I also volunteered at a special needs camp over the summer, plus I applied for this competitive course where you write a research paper under a university professor for junior year, and if I get it that will look really good on my MIT application. I just hope it doesn't interfere with my internship at Oscorp. What about you, what are you doing to prepare for graduation? Aren't college apps due, like, next month for you?

Bucky: Well my boss at Dunkin Donuts said he'd give me a reference. Chicks in the drive through always tip me well

—

Sam: Why'd you punch Rumlow!

Steve: Cause he was saying creepy stuff about Natasha!

Bucky: You shouldn't have done that man

Steve: What do you mean, he was being a total asshole, I don't care if I get detention

Sam: It's not him you should be worried about

Natasha: Rogers, that was MY punch to throw

Steve: Oh no

Natasha: You think I'm some damsel in distress? Come here and I'll show you a damsel in distress

Steve: I, uh, gotta go *runs out the door*

Natasha: Which way did he go.

Sam: I didn't see nothin'

Bucky: Out those doors and to the left

Sam: Bruh

Bucky: A true friend understands when the consequences are necessary *kicks Rumlow who's still lying on the ground as he walks away*

—

Bruce: What did the racing hot dog say when he passed the finish line?

Tony: What

Bruce: I'm a wiener!

Everyone:

Bruce: Get it? Like winner?

Tony: It's okay man, just stick to academics

Thor: I have one! A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar

Everyone:

Thor: HAHAHA, what a coincidence for them all to arrive in the establishment simultaneously!

*Everyone bursts out laughing*

Bruce: Oh come on, that wasn't even a joke!

Tony: See he has charisma. It's all about the delivery Brucie Bear

—

Sam: Wait, you're saying that the elephant toothpaste all over the second floor right before midterms was you?

Rhodey: Hell yeah it was

Sam: But everyone blamed Tony. Even Tony's parents and the principal. The only reason he wasn't suspended was because the cameras were wiped of evidence, which was also blamed on Tony

Rhodey: Yeah you'd be surprised about how much stuff I do that Tony gets blamed for. Public image does wonders to create bias

Sam: What the hell? I thought you were the responsible one and Tony was your monkey on a leash. Why does he let you blame him?

Rhodey: Cuz he's a good bro. He gets to piss his parents off, I don't get kicked out of ROTC, and then we laugh about it afterwards

Sam: You evil geniuses...

—

Wanda: I want to get married

Natasha: Are you pregnant?

Wanda: What? No

Natasha: Oh thank goodness. Wait, then why do you want to get married

Wanda: Because it's romantic!

Natasha: And the tax benefits?

Wanda: No! Well, yes that would be nice, but no! I want to be a stay at home mom and have a nice family

Natasha: Girl you failed home economics and your type is men who think calling you their "situationship" is making it official, why don't we focus on finding the vertex for now

—

If u like this vibe I have a domestic Avengers "in a timeline where Civil War didn't end in divorce" series as well:

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 :P

[klausysworld]

Hey, I love your writing style a lot so I wanted to ask if your open for a Joseph Morgan request?

Here’s what I had in mind:

Reader is new on set of The Originals and on one of her first days, she has to film a spicy scene with Joseph. She feels uncomfortable about doing that with a co star she has a little crush on and generally have to undress for a scene. He calms her and guides her through it, always looking out that she’s comfortable. Just a cute Joseph please and the end is very up to you :)

Thank you <3

Camera Shy

Joining the Originals set was a long shot for me, I hadn't actually expected to be casted and casted as a love interest was more than I had even auditioned for.

Getting to know everyone on set was a little scary but everyone was lovely, and funny, some of them (Daniel) were especially funny and Daniel and Joseph together were a right sketch.

Claire, Phoebe, Riley and Danielle had been great at helping me feel apart of the group despite coming in late.

Scenes sometimes took a few takes and a lot of time but seeing them put all together made every second worth it.

The most difficult scenes had been the more romantic scenes with Joseph. The first make out scene had been so awkward, completely my fault, and therefore every other scene seemed to make me worse.

The amount of makeup they had to put on me to hide the way my cheeks blushed was embarrassing and even then sometimes I swear I could still see it on the camera.

The embarrassment was high enough just kissing let alone stripping down to my underwear in front of a dozen cameras, costars and directors. But the most anxiety raising part of it was knowing Joseph's hands were going to be the ones pulling my shirt off, tugging my jeans down and I was going to have to do the same to him.

They have us a half an hour break right before the scene, everyone was getting a coffee or whatever but I couldn't even thing about relaxing.

I felt sweaty, I felt like he would be able to smell me and tell that I was turned on and terrified all at once.

My breathing was rushed and broken as I looked at myself in the mirror. I couldn't cry, makeup had spent hours making sure I looked flawless.

But I couldn't help it as the nerves bred fast. My fingers tapped the desk in an unkept pattern, my eyes blurring up and nose getting stuffy.

I really hadn't expected the hands on my shoulders, the soft touch rubbing along my arms both gently and firmly.

"Do you feel okay, love?" He asked and I sniffed. "Do you need me to tell them you'll be off sick?"

"No..." I mumbled, trying to blink away any tears but he had it covered when a folded square of tissue tapped under my eyes carefully. "I'm sorry, I'm just being silly." I laughed but he only frowned.

"You're scared?" He murmured, arm wrapping around my waist in the gesture of comfort that I needed.

"I don't know...I've just never had to take off any clothes for TV before you know? I haven’t-" I swallowed down my words and he pulled me to a hug.

"I understand" he nodded, rubbing my back. "I can talk to them, we can change the scene or move it."

"We can't, I have to do it and I want to do it for the viewers but it's just really hard and people are gonna look and me and say things-"

"The only things anyone will say is how beautiful you look." He interrupted, eyes boring into mine like the ocean during the night, "Nobody will want you to do this scene if you feel this uncomfortable, I promise you they'll understand."

I sniffled and shook my head. "It's gonna be good for my career, I need to" I mumble and he squeezed me a little.

"I'll be right there for you, the whole time. I'll be gentle-" He tried to reassure but I knew the directors would retake.

"Klaus is rough, the script specifically says that-" I argued

"I'm not though and I don't care what the script says, it's not like they can fire me this late. So I'll be gentle and I'll take care of you." He told me firmly and I could only nod.

I looked as though nothing had happened by the time I was back out there. Cameras rolling, zooming in on us, I could feel them. But Joseph made sure I could feel him there too, sometimes when I looked at him during a scene I just saw him as his character but in that moment I knew it was just us, no Klaus just Joseph.

So when our lips met I let it be our lips, his hands on my body and my body only. Not who I was supposed to be. When my top was lifted from my body and his eyes looked into mine I knew what he was asking. When his hands popped the button on my jeans and slid them down my legs, I knew his intentions weren't to push me just to guide me. His touch encouraged me to return the favour, plucking his clothes from his skin like feathers from a bird. Like the feathers that covered is shoulder.

My fingers touched the tattoo, stroking it softly as his hands slid up to my waist and warmed my skin. I could faintly hear the camera crew calling cut as the scene faded out of picture.

But he didn't just leave me vulnerable and alone on the set. He didn't pull his clothes back on and go off laughing with the guys.

He rubbed my arms like he had earlier and asked if I felt okay and I did. His smile reached my heart and the kiss to my cheek somehow felt more intimate than the way his tongue had pushed at my lips moments ago.

A blanket from the set was wrapped over my shoulders as he lead me away and kept talking to me, just being there for me.

He made me feel safe; comfortable.

[womenloverlmao]

Spencer Reid NSFW Alphabet

He's so babygirl

Im not adding warnings or like whats included because this is all over the fucking place and yeah that's nobody's fault but my own but still

Dont like it dont read it, dont complain.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He thinks it's so fucking important, he could probably go off on a rant about it, too. (But let's be honest, he can go off on a rant about anything.) He thinks it creates an emotional bond, shit like that. Even though he's the sub, he does like to take care of you after you take care of him.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite (and yours of his) are his hands. He knows he knows what to do with them, driving you absolutely crazy. He also 100% teases you with it too, just saying. He can be insecure sometimes about certain things, but he knows them.

He loves your thighs and tits. Let's be honest, we all know he's a boob guy.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He cries when he climaxes sometimes.

Also he either likes cumming in you or on your tits. (Bro is obsessed with the tibbies)

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Sometimes steals your panties, but he puts them back (after washing them) and you don't really notice. He also knows how to hide it so like

This one you know about, he was getting INTO it and he got a work call that he had to pick up while he was still inside you. A couple whimpers were let out when you moved against him and it was so embarrassing but no one besides you two know. they thought he was sick because he is a sickly victorian child

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Bro is not experienced at all, he was a virgin before you, but he knows what he's doing from reading so fucking much about literally everything. Sure, he might be awkward at first, but once he's done it once and is sure you like it he's pretty good at everything.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He likes when you're on top, but his favorite is when your legs are thrown either around his waist or over his shoulders as he absolutely pounds into you like a bitch in heat.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

there are moments where even when he is balls-deep inside you you both can't help but laugh. he sometimes spews random facts and he can't shut himself up so it can be really a mess but you both love it.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

It all depends on your preferences. He keeps it relatively short, but if you need it shorter he'll do it.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

It's 100% Intimate, even if it can be silly sometimes. it's just different, in your own way, really.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

When he's on his own in a hotel room and you're back home and he needs you, he'll do it. Most of the time he needs your voice to do so, but he knows when you go to bed, and if it's before that he will call you but if it's not he'll do it on his own. If you send him pictures of yourself? uses them. he won't admit it, but he does.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Mommy kink. I don't need to elaborate.

Orgasm Denial

Overstimulation

B r e e d i n g.

Degradation but only a little, you have to add praise to it and then it's fine.

Kinda like possession?? But not like in a keeping you or him locked up, in a 'you're mine' way.

Hair pulling.

Probably into pegging

Nipple play on you.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Bedroom. That's pretty much it. He gets to thinking too much anywhere else. He gets too into thinking in the bedroom, how do you expect him to fuck you in a bathroom shawty

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You in his clothes. Dirty talk. Sometimes it's nothing specific, and he's touch-starved so he can act like a teenager.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

I feel like he would stay away from bondage after Hankel. Before then, he would be fine, but chances are this all takes place after so yeah no. Same reason for spanking and shit. It may look like he's super kinky, but there are more things he wouldn't do than things he would.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He likes when you give him head but dude would do anything if you let him eat you out. He's absolutely amazing. He has your body memorized, so like

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He can do whatever, but when he's trying to make himself cum (normally after he's made you cum and leaves you super fucking overstimulated but he wants to cum so badly) he's fast and like holy f u c k. but he knows how you like it, so before then it's whatever makes you cum quickest so he can cum. also random but I forgot to put that he always makes you cum first.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Will do them, but prefers having time with you and that shit.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He is but if it's something listed up there it's a no. He could try different things but there are many things that he just wouldn't do.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Can go like three five-minute rounds with breaks in between them, but when he's doing it on you he will probably overstimulate you to no end just trying to make you feel good.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn't have anything but if you wanted to do things with them, they could be implanted.

If you got a dildo he would let you use it on him after a little bit of convincing.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Depends on the day and if he's being a dom or a sub, but even inside of those it depends. He leans more submissive and loves to please you, but he is 100% a brat and will tease you.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He is l o u d. he can be quiet but he will whimper, moan, whine, beg. (bitch in heat I'm not sorry)

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He loves listening and being the sub while being the top. Like... do you get what I mean?

Also one time he was in you, rubbing your clit, trying to get you to cum and he said 'Did you know about 75% of the clitoris is inside the body' and you actually burst out laughing and yall had to stop what you were doing and like gather everything and make sure you didn't die while he was inside you again.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

6.5 inches, and thick. like, ripping your vagina from the inside out thick. (why am I set on this hill please murder me slowly)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

It wasn't high. until you came around, then he is just like EVERY MOMENT OF THE DAY turned on. it's physically impossible, or it should be.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If it weren't so icky in his head he could probably fall asleep immediately afterwards, but he has to clean it up and then he can fall asleep.

[shaisuki]

CIGARETTE SMOKE

|| the third entry for the series “𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐖𝐄 𝐃𝐎 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄”

content warnings ─── yandere themes, implied kidnapping, hints of smut, jealousy.

is it bad that you want to take someone just to protect them from this world? aki regretted but doesn't feel bad about it.

we devil hunters don't have the long life to live.

there's a certain annoyance that has been creeping up on me since you joined the division. you clearly didn't belong here and sometimes i would ask myself why are you here? why are you wasting your life in this hellhole for no reason. you're alive. happy. you aren't here for revenge. to avenge your loved ones from the devils. you have no purpose here. you don't belong here.

however it's not my place to dictate someone's choice of being here but you infuriate me to no end that i wished for your demise. i didn't understand why i feel this way towards you. it doesn't make sense. you were a nobody to mine. not the one i should care for but sometimes i can't take my eyes off you.

the gnawing feeling of seeing you so friendly and close to someone like denji makes my blood boil and it's easy to ignore it but i can't not when you're starting to grow on me.

what casual moments between us, i have cherished it. not realizing what effect it could have on me. i started to see you on my dreams. started to crave your presence that i can no longer breath and it hurts me so much that i have started to feel this way to you more than i would like to admit.

then we started to lay on the same bed. where can i hear you breath. feel you under my fingertips. the softness and warmth you provided for simply existing. how it provided the intimacy of comfort and security. drown in the depths of the pools of your eyes that i can no longer swim and sink in to you.

is this what it feels to fall for someone who is close but is distant. how could it be when you're the one who initiated it. how cruel are you but i can't blame you. we simply comforted each other with our bodies and it's my fault that i let myself feel what i wanted to feel.

this would be our last night together. allow me to cherish you. let me feel you. let me sink my teeth unto your skin that you will feel me for days.

the gasps and moans that left your lips breathlessly is the air i breath. say my name the way i like it. say my name as i touch you in places where it brought you pleasure. the stretch marks and scars decorating your skin that i have memorized. the curves and every swell of your body where i have kissed and worshipped. allow me. allow me. allow me. allow me to savor all of it. you won't deprive me of it. i know of it since you're helplessly under me.

that's right. that's how things should be. you and me. nothing else in this world that can stop us. not even the devils.

why won't you be mine?

the thought occured to me. why? we have shared our thoughts. the touch that i came to miss. the kisses that i denied at first and learned to crave. i have touched you. we've exchanged sweet nothings. the string of salivas connecting our lips. my lips on yours and my spent deep inside you. painting your walls white as you came around me. isn't it enough that we belong to each other. you're mine. you're mine. you're mine. you are mine.

so forgive me. forgive me that the last thing you will ever see is the smoke coming from my cigarette as i lay claim on you. protecting you from this cruel world that took the people i loved and i won't let it happen to you. i don't understand myself why i am asking for your forgiveness when i know you won't forgive but it won't hurt to ask. you're too kind and that was your mistake for having me. for letting me in your world that I claimed to be mine.

my thoughts are muddled and the only thing that keeps me sane of my reality is the light coming from the end of my cigarette and your warm body resting beside me. warm. it is a good thing. you're still alive and you'll wake up with me beside you. that's better. is all i can think as i watch my cigarette smoke disappear in the thin air like you were.

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

𓏲 ࣪₊♡ what i think katsuki n’ shouto would listen to !♡𓏲 ࣪₊

a/n : so I had this ready..but Tumblr fuckin ate the og ask..so anon if ur still sticking around (this was sent to me before I want on my break :(() ily !! and I hope you enjoy ! and all of y'all too off ! 3K WE UP !!

katsuki ♡

for some reason, i cannot get the image of katsuki listening to nobody by skindred out of my head LMFAOOO

(maybe bc ive been listening to it non stop)

so anyways i think you can tell that i'm feeling very metal for him,, nu metal, heavy metal, groove metal he's all for it ! i don't see him being particularly picky about it.

i think he'd listen to deftones, slipknot, skindred and korn ! i think he also has other similar bands in his playlist but i see these as most of his mains !

katsuki's a renowned little shit, so he'll share his earbuds with you, have you thinking he's on some cute shit only for him to hide his phone screen from you to jumpscare with a hyper loud song so he can snicker about it like a mountain troll💀

so yeah he's extremely irritating. of course if ur into it yall jam out together !!

buuuut on the other hand he definitely is a rap/hip hop and r&b typa guy !

i can definitely see him listening to some mf doom, tupac and DEFINITELY kendrick lamar oh em gee

pls don't get me started on r&b,,,i know he'd love him some brent faiyaz..teehehehe <3

i feel like he'd really like frank ocean and tyler the creator ! i feel like he wouldn't be a hyper fan, but he has a lot of songs in his playlist !

don't ask me why yall,,,but tell me why i see him listening to fugees and erykah badu...dreamy sigh

so yeah he'll jumpscare the shit outta you with his loud music, but most of the time when he's not being a nuisance he'll happily share his earbud with you and put on some sappy soul song to subtly tell you he love you cus hes shy lolol

a lot of the songs he listens to he relates to so,, if he plays the intro of all mine by brent faiyaz.. KNOW ITS ABOUT YOUUU!!!

shouto♡

now shouto's a lil trickier for me..i feel like he likes to experiment w new music genres sometimes, but he has his lil favourites yaknow??

i like thinking he'd listen to steve lacy and frank ocean ! he has a few select songs that he likes the most ! he gives me infrunami n' mercury typa vibes

it feels the best for me to say he'd listen to indie rock/pop (sorry if these aren't the right terms yall it's googles fault if they aint😭)

i feel like he fucks w the smiths HEAVY. i also see him listening to the cure ! he also gives me smells like teen spirit by nirvana !

like i said i feel like he likes to experiment cus lemme be honest i feel he's messy😭 like his playlist is a clusterfuck

there is no sad playlist or casual playlist like everything is in one playlist LMFAOOO

but no yeah he doesn't care much, which is why i think if you put him on the good shit you might see some pink pantheress n some laufey in there LMFAOO

if you recommend a song to him it's probably in there before you can blink lololol

shouto also starts copying your playlist after a while lolol soon you'll start thinking you have your phone when you scroll thru his playlist but nah💀

i also see him listening to mitski..need i say more ?

this was such a cute ask and it was rlly fun to do !! if you guys have any questions like these PLEAASSEEE feel free to ask me !!! tysm for the ask anon n' m'sorry it took me so long to respond ! i'm gettin' to all your asks one at a time, so please be patient with me <3 !!!

[lavender-vixen]

Hiiii! could you do something like a weird older guy following the reader and she’s like all scared and tells patrick about it and he deals with it?? or somethin like that

"Nobody Touches What's Mine." (Patrick Hockstetter x Reader).

At first, it’s just a feeling. That sinking weight in your stomach, the one that makes you walk a little faster on your way home, the one that makes you glance over your shoulder every few minutes.

You tell yourself it’s nothing. That maybe you’re just being paranoid. But then you start noticing him. The man. Too old. Too familiar. Too present. Always lingering.

At the gas station when you stop for a pack of smokes. At the record store when you’re flipping through cassettes. At the diner where you and Patrick usually mess around with the rest of the gang in the corner booth, tossing fries at each other, making jokes about the sad locals who drink their mornings away, all of you swearing you won't end up like them.

And every time you look up, he’s just there. Watching. Waiting. Like he’s circling you, getting closer every time.

That’s when you realize...this isn’t in your head.

Patrick Hockstetter doesn’t do jealous. He doesn’t do worried. And he sure as hell doesn’t do protective boyfriend bullshit.

So when you tell him some creep has been following you around Derry, watching you, waiting for you, he just snorts, shakes his head, and flicks his cigarette out the window.

"You’re hot, babe," he mutters, eyes on the road, one hand lazy on the wheel, the other resting on your thigh. "Guys stare. It’s kinda your fault."

You glare at him. "My fault?"

Patrick grins, squeezing your leg. "Yeah. Walking around looking like that? You’re lucky I don’t follow you around just for fun."

You roll your eyes, but your stomach twists. Because Patrick does follow you sometimes. Just to see if you’ll notice.

When you whip around and catch him leaning against a lamppost, smirking at you from across the street like some handsome, deranged shadow? It makes you shiver in the best way.

But this isn’t Patrick stalking you. This isn’t fun. This is some stranger. And that’s different.

"Patrick, I’m serious," you murmur, fingers tightening around the hem of your skirt. "He’s always there. Walking behind me. Watching me. He was at the diner yesterday. At the fucking laundromat last week. He just stands there. I think he's the one who's been stealing my underwear."

Patrick sighs, shifting in his seat. And when he finally looks at you, really looks at you, his smirk flickers. Just for a second. Just enough for you to know that he believes you now.

And that means the guy’s already dead.

The next day, you’re sitting at some greasy burger joint, picking at a basket of fries, and when you glance up—there he is. The man. Standing outside, watching through the window.

Your stomach drops. Your fingers clench the napkin in your lap.

"Okay," you whisper. "You see him?"

Patrick doesn’t answer. He just keeps chewing his fry, his expression unreadable, lazy, eyes flicking to the man through the window. And when the creep finally notices Patrick looking back at him, he turns away.

Patrick exhales. Leans back in the booth. And grins. "You’re right," he mutters. "You got yourself a little admirer."

You shiver. "Patrick, this isn't funny—"

"Relax, babe," he murmurs, licking salt off his thumb, watching the guy like a hawk. "He won’t be a problem for long."

The following week, you're with Patrick at the gas station. You go inside, thinking you’ll be quick. You haven't seen your stalker all week. Thinking he’s gone. Thinking that Patrick was right, that the guy was just a creep with a staring problem.

But he’s not gone. He’s waiting. And the second you step away from the bathroom door, heading toward the soda machine, he’s there. Standing too close. Blocking your way. Smiling.

"You’re a hard girl to catch alone," he says, voice low, casual, too familiar.

Your stomach twists. That was not a normal thing to say. You glance toward the cashier. But he’s not there. It’s just you and this guy. And when you try to step around him, he blocks your path.

"You come here a lot?" he asks. "I think I’ve seen you before."

Your pulse kicks up. "Excuse me," you mutter, trying again to move past him.

"Relax," he says, grinning wider, like this is a game to him. "Just making conversation."

You don’t answer. You just take another step, but then his hand brushes your arm. Not grabbing. Just touching. Just enough to make your skin crawl.

"You got a boyfriend?" he asks, voice lower now, more deliberate.

Your stomach drops.

And then he leans in. Too close. "You look like you’d be fun to take out."

You shove past him. Hard. Fast. You don’t look back. You push out the convenience store doors, breath coming fast, pulse hammering in your ears.

Patrick’s leaning against the car, smoking, watching you. And the second he sees your face, sees the way you slam the door behind you, his expression shifts. He straightens. Steps toward you.

"What's up," he says, voice too calm.

Your fingers clench into fists. "He was inside."

Patrick’s eyes darken. He knows immediately who you're talking about. "Did he touch you?"

Your breath is shaky. "He—" You swallow. "Not—he didn’t grab me. But he—"

Patrick doesn’t wait. Doesn’t ask more questions. Doesn’t need to.

Because he already knows. Because he sees him. Through the gas station window. The guy, still inside, watching.

Patrick exhales. Cracks his knuckles. Then he hands you his switchblade. "Stay here." Then he walks inside.

Patrick doesn’t make a scene. Not at first. He just walks up behind the guy, leans against the counter, and waits. Waits until the creep finally notices him. Until he turns his head, and sees Patrick Hockstetter grinning at him.

That’s when the guy’s face changes. Patrick already has a hand on his shoulder, squeezing just hard enough to make him tense.

"You and I gotta talk, man," Patrick murmurs, voice low, casual, calm.

The guy freezes. "I don’t—"

Patrick’s grip tightens. "I think you do."

"No, I'm gonna be late for—"

"This won't take long." Then Patrick steers him toward the bathroom. Where no one else can hear. Where no one else can see. Where no one else is going to interrupt him.

It’s only a few minutes later when Patrick returns. He wipes his hands on his jeans, flicks his cigarette into the pavement, rolls his shoulders like he’s dusting off something unpleasant. And when he looks at you, he just smirks.

"Man’s not gonna bother you again."

You swallow. "You—?"

"Nothing permanent," he interrupts, sliding into the driver’s seat. "Didn’t have time for that."

Then he shoots you a sideways glance, his smirk widening. "But let’s just say he’s gonna be real nervous around Derry for a while."

The car flies down the road, headlights slicing through the dark, the radio crackling with some song Patrick isn’t even listening to. He’s too wired, fingers drumming against the wheel to the music, jaw tight, still high on whatever he just did to that guy.

You’re watching him. Patrick isn’t just his usual brand of cocky and reckless. He’s seething.

"Can’t fucking stand guys like that," he mutters suddenly, shaking his head.

You raise an eyebrow. "Creeps?"

Patrick exhales sharply. "Guys who think they can touch something that isn’t theirs."

Your stomach flutters. "You seem worked up," you murmur, voice smooth, teasing.

Patrick snorts, shifting gears, eyes flicking to you like he already knows what you’re doing. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," you murmur, tilting your head, dragging your fingers down his arm, feeling the muscle tense under your touch.

"Wonder what would happen if I ran into him again, and you weren't around," you muse.

Patrick’s grip tightens on the wheel. "You won’t."

You smirk. "What if I do?"

Patrick lets out a sharp laugh, but there’s no humor in it. "You tryin' to piss me off?"

"You already are."

Patrick’s jaw tics. Then, without warning, he veers the car off the main road—pulling into a dark, empty lot behind an abandoned warehouse. Throws it in park. Turns to you.

Patrick doesn’t say a word. Not at first. Raking a hand through his hair. His voice is low, sharp, edged with something dangerous. "That was not fucking cool."

You almost get goosebumps, shifting in your seat. "Patrick—"

"I should’ve killed him," he mutters, shaking his head, gripping the wheel like he’s barely keeping himself from turning around and going back.

"Patrick—"

"No," he snaps, finally turning to face you, eyes dark, burning, serious. "You don’t just corner a young girl by herself, touch her arm, and ask if she has a fucking boyfriend."

You shiver. Because yeah. When he says it like that, it sounds just as bad as it felt. But still.

"I don’t know," you murmur, biting your lip, glancing down, suddenly unsure. "Maybe I got it wrong. Maybe he was just being friendly, and I—"

Patrick snorts. "You think that was fucking friendly?"

You hesitate. He leans in.

"You ever see me walk up to some random girl in a gas station and ask if she’s got a boyfriend? Stroking her skin like I wanna wear it?"

You pause. No. You haven’t. Patrick doesn’t do that. He doesn’t have to.

"Coming from me," he mutters, "that’s not normal. That’s fucking weird. And you—" his fingers trail up your arm, ghosting over the spot that creep touched "—don’t just let shit like that slide. You're too pretty for that kind of blindness. That's dangerous."

Your breath catches. Because Patrick isn’t teasing now. Isn’t smirking. Isn’t acting like this is some joke. He’s serious.

"Maybe I overreacted, though..." you tried again, watching his eyes narrow in disgust. "Like you said, sometimes it's my fault that the guys at school look at me."

"Love yourself, dammit," he snaps, grabbing your wrist. "Don't be stupid. You see him again," he tilts his head, voice dropping to something dark, something low, something protective. "You tell me."

You nod. That's terrifying, and kind of hot. He turns the key in the ignition again, starting the engine.

He grips your chin, forcing your eyes to his. "No one touches you like that again." His fingers tighten. "Ever."

Your body burns. And before you even realize what you’re doing, you’re unbuckling your seatbelt, crawling over the center console, straddling his lap, kissing him so hard your teeth clash.

Patrick grunts as you grind against him, hands immediately gripping your hips, holding you there.

"What was that for?" he mutters, smirking against your mouth.

You shrug, tweaking his nose with a finger, knowing he hates when you do that. Patrick immediately cringes, scrunching his face, eyes squeezing shut as he shakes his head.

"For being my hero," you answer him, pressing a quick, teasing kiss to his nose.

Patrick exhales, still in thought, still gripping your hips, holding you against him. Then he smirks, tilting his head. "Hero, huh?"

His fingers tighten, sliding under your shirt, teasing the bare skin of your waist, slowly. "You know I only did it 'cause you're mine, right?"

You don't answer. You don't have to. Patrick already knows. And when he leans in again, brushing his mouth over yours, his grin widening against your lips...you know exactly what's coming next.

[echantedtoon]

Quite A Handful Ch1 Aizetsu, Sekido, Urogi, Karaku, And Hantengu

Sometimes it was a handful to have so many husbands.

(This is inspired by @starrcityyy's Hantengu Wife Y/n art. (Warnings: Their blog does contain NSFW elements and themes that not everyone may like or be comfortable with. Just a heads up. But this WILL STAY Sfw.) I did ask if they were fine with someone writing drabbles inspired by their au before writing this, and they mentioned that they were fine. This is probably not gonna be very long and it's from the perspective of a female reader.

Wife Y/n Concept- @starrcityyy

Demon Slayer- Koyoharu Gotouge

Warning: Karaku IS his own warning. Possibly some innuendos. Mentioned killing.)

The thunderstorm I'm the distance between the roof and sky haunted the eardrums as the storm drew ever closer in the darkness.

There truly was nothing but the warmth of the small fireplace within the cozy small house in the middle of the woods. A cozy small hideaway nobody knew but you and a select few individuals. It would shield you well from the harsh elements and keep you safe and sound from the outside. It was your own little safe haven. Just yourself to worry about now. 

The bubbling pot of soup on the stove wafted in waves making even the most stuffed person desire to eat it as you smelt it. A hum of satisfaction left your throat as you nodded and took your hand off the soup ladder after stirring it a few times. This would surely last you a few days. Cooking enough food to last you a few days was always good. Having leftovers only meant you didn't have to cook over a hot stove for a good while. It left you time to focus on other things. Speaking of other things- F/c eyes turned to the door as thunder drew ever closer and closer judging by the sounds in the distance. Now where are they?

They usually weren't this late. 

It was sort of a pattern by now. Usually the first one to show up would be the most skittish one after he runs away from whatever danger scared him. Cowering by your legs and hugging you for comfort. Then depending on how hard the task was, the other four would follow right after either sooner or later. Like said it depended on how hard her husband's work was that day. You supposed tonight would be a hard working day. Until then you busied yourself by picking up a broom to start sweeping up the floor. The faint sounds of broom bristles scraping on the floor added to the crackling fire and the distant thunder. Perhaps that's why-

You didn't hear anything when the door opened.

You didn't see the demon crawling it's way inside scuttling like an insect.

Didn't sense the figure looking behind you until deadly claws wrapped around your form.

"Hi. You're home late," you casuay said not bothering to look up at the form trembling as it clutched onto your kimono. "What happened to you this time?"

"Not my fault! N-Not my fault! The hands that had killed them were not mine!", a voice sobbed and croaked out between cries. 

Yep. Seemed about right.

"Are you hungry? Or did you already eat out tonight?"

"*Hic* I didn't do iiiiiiitttt!!"

"You already ate then. Good to know." 

By now you could already interpret what he meant by his rambles. Wasn't always easy though especially when he had the tendency to go on for ages. An insistent series of weak shaking tugs told you all you needed to know about what he wanted. Without batting an eye, the broom was placed to the side and she assumed the position of turning around and doing the familiar process of hugging the sobbing demon closer to her while he sobbed into the folds of her dress. Make no mistakes. He had the outward visage of a weak old man but he was far from weakly.

"Shh. Shh. There, there now. You're ok. Nothing's going to hurt you. You're alright." Her hand soothingly patted over his back and head being mindful of his horns.

"Monsters. Monsters! All of them! Putting blame on me when it wasn't my.." his voice dissolved into muffled sobs and whimpering in the fabric of hee dress she could barely make out. 

It times like this it would be a while before he was able to pull himself together and this time would be no exception. You spent the better half of an hour just calming him. He had completely almost calmed down when again the door was opened but with much more force. The door frame rattled from the five of the door sliding open and the sound echoed throughout the room. The loud sound had him squealing in fright again and scrambling to hide behind her legs gripping onto the fabric of her dress.

"HONEY, I'M HOME!~"

"Shut UP, Karaku! My head is killing me!"

"It's not my fault you let yourself get hit by that boulder.~"

"YOU'RE THE ONE THAT BLEW IT TOWARDS ME YOU ABSOLUTE IMBECILE!!"

"Then next time  don't stand in my way ~"

"WHY YOU STUPID-!!"

"That's enough both of you. Your fighting is making me sad." 

Footsteps approached and by the screams she could already tell who else had shown up. One. Two. Three. AAAnd four more demons dangerous and strong. One holding his head annoyed and scowling. Two looking amused by his anger and smiling. And one last one looking a mixture of 'over this' and slightly worried. 

"Hi, honey." You smiled at them. "How was work?"

"Miserabl.     G."  Your husband rubbing his annoyed temples didn't even look up.

"AW. Sekido's just upset because he got a boo boo.~ Big deal.~" Said green eyed husband rolled his eyes when his angrier counterpart shot him a dirty look, but soon put all his focus into giving her a wolfish grin. "But enough about him.~ What's our cute little wifey been up to?~"

"Cleaning. Are you all hungry? I made dinner."

"Nah. We ate before we got here." Another arm wrapped around her and pulled her against a fluffier wing in contrast to his sharp claws that pulled her against him. "But it's so cute seeing you all domestic. Makes me just wanna gobble you up!"

"Let's not eat her. That'll just make all of us sad."

"Aizetsu. I-...I was just joking. Y'know?" Your blue eyes husband just stared. "You know. Like a joke I did just for fun. ...You did know that right?'

".... I'm going to be keeping a very close eye on you from now on."

"Aizetsu, Im serious! It was just a joke. I wouldn't really eat her!"

The veins on Sekido's forehead got bigger than before as Aizetsu stared down a now slightly intimidated harpy demon and Karaku laughed at all three of them. Meanwhile the trembling demon behind you finally let go of your dress in favor of hiding his face in them but still his behind you. Your head tilted in concern at Sekido. Out of all five of them, he seemed to be the only one in genuine pain.

"Well enough of pleasantries.~" Karaku smoothed his bangs to the side before pressing an arm on the wall above your head and giving a bigger smirk. "I've missed this pretty thing.~ How about you and me-"

He fell silent as you suddenly ducked under his arm and out of Urogi's grip. Hantengu squealed as his makeshift shield was removed and all watched as you ignored all of them in favor of grabbing Sekido's head and pulling the lightly surprised man towards you.

"You look worse for wear. Are you alright, Honey?"

Sekido blinked before scowling."Peachy. Karaku blew a dam boulder at me! My head is KILLING me."

You cooed before pulling his head lower to cradle it much to the disgruntled others' dismay. "There, there. Poor baby. Come on. I'll get you some pain medicine and have you lie down."

"I don't need to be coddled!.....But this is fine I guess."

"Do you want me to stay with you until you feel better?"

Sekido paused.. before looking at the others and giving a rare triumphant smirk that earnt him jealous frowns.

"Yes. I'm going to need a LOT of care."

[adenomors]

epic!Calypso is NOT more innocent than odyssey!Calypso

TW: sexual assault / rape

Sometimes I see people say that epic!Calypso never laid her hands on Odysseus, and that it was only in the original story, which is not true. It's not stated directly, but the implications of sexual assault are still there.

"Soon into bed we'll climb and spend our time" When paired with both the source material and the other lines I'll mention, this line gains a sexual connotation. There are other reasons you could climb in bed with someone, but when you consider the context, it's most likely climbing into bed for sex.

(EDIT: I originally said "Nobody talks about climbing into bed with their 'lover' and isn't insinuating sex. Especially not in the middle of the day (naps exist, yeah, but we both know that's not what she was talking about)." This is not true, there are plenty of reasons you could climb into bed with a lover without having sex, which was brought to my attention in the reblogs. I was (kind of) exaggerating to prove my point, but I didn't clarify that I was exaggerating at all, so that's entirely my bad. I also didn't really consider the other connotations of that line, so sorry about this! I do still believe Calypso did want something sexual when she said that, but not everyone who asks to "climb into bed" with a s/o does.)

"I'm not your man / Hell no, I could kill you where you stand! I'm no pet, I'm a married man / No, no, I don't belong here! There's something wrong here! I won't be drawn to love in paradise. Not till the end of time, there is no way" Odysseus said no multiple times and she doesn't listen. She's still very affectionate and insists that he's the love of her life, which proves that Calypso doesn't care about his consent, she just cares that he's there.

"Oh, handsome, you may try, but last I checked goddesses can't die! You're adorable, bow down now to the immortal Calypso" She doesn't take his refusals seriously, she calls him cute for trying to say no. There's a clear power imbalance here, and because of that, Calypso views Ody's consent as beneath her or unnecessary. Calypso may love Odysseus, but she doesn't respect him in the slightest.

"Seven years she's kept you trapped out of your control, time can take a heavy toll" It's true that Odysseus is thinking about his dead friends when he attempts suicide, but Athena's line here implies a lot about Calypso. Everything she does with him is completely out of Ody's control; he has no power in this situation. I'm sure you can see the implications of that yourself, especially when it was so clearly rape in the source material.

"Someone arrived today. They said they're taking you away, that you're not mine to save" The way this is phrased makes it seem like Calypso did think Odysseus was hers to save, like she saw him as more of an object to love than a person. And that's all true: she sees him as beneath her, like I said above. I could be reaching on this one, but this line isn't alone, it's added on top of all the other ones. This line supports the other implications.

"Then I am sorry that my love's too much for you, but I'm not sorry for loving you" This is a common manipulation tactic, and Calypso may not be doing it consciously, but she's putting part of the blame on Odysseus. She only loved him, she's not in the wrong! It's Ody's fault for not being able to handle it! That's what she's insinuating when she says that, and I doubt it's on purpose, but she's still doing it.

She did rape Odysseus, and she knew what she was doing (she would have to, based on the amount of times he said no), she just didn't understand why it was wrong. Ody is the first person she's met... ever. She wouldn't know how valuable a mortal's consent is. I'm not defending her btw, she's absolutely in the wrong, I just like to analyze Calypso's actions. She's fun to analyze. Anyways, the point I'm trying to make is... stop saying epic!Calypso didn't touch Ody!! She did!! You can like her without defending her actions!!

[tapwater118]

d-side team bleh! at long last!

(once again copy pasting book and icy)

book is a crazed conspiracy theorist who doesn’t have as much of a hold on reality as she probably should. stays up late looking through “the deep web” (the third page of google search results) for the things the government doesn’t want you to know. she thinks her friend taco is an alien sent here to survey earth for her alien overlords

dry ice (renamed from ice cube) is very sweet, if overly conflict-avoidant. she is absolutely a follower and was (is?) pencil’s go-to yes-woman for a while. she’s become more of her own person as time’s gone on, but still very much relies on others for affirmation

tardrop (renamed from teardrop) is a lazy prick. someone else is doing the challenge? great, time to kick back and chillax. she has very little drive to get going and do anything, and often ignores her teammates whenever they try to get her in gear. though it’s not entirely her fault; she is deaf after all (and mute, but that isn’t related to anything here)

dora is, honestly, an enigma. nobody really knows much about her, and it doesn’t help that she mumbles things instead of using any kind of decipherable speech. she’s smarter than people take her for, though, and is often the one setting her team up for success behind the scenes (not that she gets any thanks for it)

lollipop has a certain way with words that tends to calm whomever she’s speaking to, even that jittery book (sometimes). while giving an air of aloofness she does care for her teammates and will be there when one needs a shoulder to fall on

taco has a certain way with words that tends to win over the ladies, except that jittery book (sometimes). she’s fucking awesome (her words, not mine). that sick looking motorcycle over there? that’s hers, and she’s about to do a sick jump with it. wow, that was cool

saw is an accident magnet (unrelated to her actual magnetism). there isn’t a single bone in her body she hasn’t broken before, and she’s no stranger to cuts and scrapes, but she’s still super cheery despite it. even if you knock her down, she’ll get right back up (provided her legs aren’t broken) with a smile (sans several teeth) on her (likely bruised) face

gaty is quite the fan of the macabre; anything dark, depressing, and disturbing is sure to draw her interest. she’s somewhat interested in book’s conspiracies, though mostly as a kind of fictional set piece rather than anything to take seriously. if you have a movie night with her, expect some experimental horror schlock with a “deep commentary on the nature of society” or whatever

[neetily]

anon with the eated ask here >_< mine was a different one, but thank goodness i have experience with getting asks eaten bc i tend to write everything i ask blogs in my notes app before submitting just to be safe…. TwT

this isn’t a request & i was gonna wait until you had them open just to be safe and send this in but there is no possible way that i can be awake at that time — just know i’m not asking for u to write a big long thing in response to this !! im just imagining a scenario of ig reverse corruption (if thts what u call this?) w seb. he’s inexperienced and still a virgin—but since getting with the farmer they give him the first taste of a real cunt and he could never imagine going back to just his fist. he’s so immediately whipped and pussy drunk that it’s practically his own mind that’s doing the corrupting… like even just seeing the farmer sleeping innocently, his mind starts racing with the most impure thoughts and he doesn’t even realize what he’s doing until hearing them stir from their sleep because of how desperately he’s humping against their ass. or being at the saloon, it’s more packed than usual, so he drags them into his lap to make room and just their scent alone is like a trigger for him to pop a boner, almost huffing down their neck a plea to jus’ put it in real quick—nobody’s paying attention.. OR OR OR—the farmer asks him to the theater and he ruins the sweet date night with how insatiable he is </3 pulling their hand to his cock in the last row while putting his own into their panties. he really just can’t help but always need another taste of them… oouf i want to drive that guy crazy with my existence alone,,

PERFECT, thank you for re-sending this in !!!! and again, i'm so sorry that your previous ask got gotten... i wonder if it'll come back...

pervert sebastian is my FAVOURITE kind of sebastian.... and it's even better when knowing that CANONICALLY... you are his first gf </3333333

i just now that that man is SO sensitive, right? like incredibly so... sometimes all it takes is a sniff, or a single exhale, or a simple brush past him and UGHHH he's ready raring willing and wanting to GO right there and then !!!

virgin sebastian who never thought sex would be this good. like an actual fiend for it, he almost feels bad for how often he wants to be buried balls deep in you... it's not his fault that he cums so soon!! you just feel so unbearably, unbelievably good!!! his hand is useless to him now :^(... he'll settle for nothing short of your cunt atp </3...

but he understands that he can't get it all the time, so he settles for other things. like using your panties, sniffing em and rubbing em on his cock and just!!!! it feels so much better because it's yours, y'know? and he never used to be this needy!!! not before he had a smidgen of cunt... but here he is, rutting against the pillow you slept on last night because he's already pestered you for morning sex, and he doesn't wanna be a bother whilst you're working </3...

man is just UTTERLY smitten with you. can't stop thinking about you at all times of the day, and how much he loves you, and how perfect you are, and how soft your body is, and how he loves the feeling of your thighs around his head, and how warm your cunt is when wrapped around his cock, and fuck, he's hard again—

he can't get enough of you. day by day falling further into you because there's a whole new world opened to him, and he wants to experience every bit of it with you <3...

[thisismeracing]

His protector | CL16

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x fem!comedian!reader (she/her)

Word count: 0.4k

Genre: regular imagine + smau (overall fluff)

Warnings: not proofread; mentions of Ferrari's disastrous strategy; fluff;

Summary: Yn is a comedian, who happens to date the f1 driver Charles Leclerc and who loves to joke around about how horrendous Ferrari is, but beware: she is the only one who can laugh at her boyfriend’s disastrous races. No one pokes fun at Charles in front of her, especially not on live TV.

A/n: This request has been sitting in my inbox forever because I'm a freaking perfectionist who loved the idea but wanted to get it to be perfect. It's my first time mixing social media au and regular images, I don't know if I'll be doing it again, but I hope you guys like it! Anon who requested: thank you sm for being so patient and kind with your request, it means a lot. I hope it's a bit like you imagined it to be. Every piece I write here it’s a new experience, so your feedback, comments, and asks are more than welcome. *mwah* 🤍

A/n2: A huge shoutout to Leri ( @elitebarzal ) for helping me with this (she was the one who sent me the jokes and helped me with the story's structure). ILY, Le!

A/n3: None of these jokes are originally mine, they're all from the internet, just like all the pictures used are from Pinterest. The writing, however, is all me, and I do not consent for it to be published anywhere else!

Based on this request.

see my masterlist | check here if you want to be on my new taglist

you can support my writing by liking, reblogging, and leaving a comment

“Why did Charles Leclerc take up gardening?” Yn asks eyes focused on the main camera in the studio, ready to deliver her joke. Anthony, Yn’s colleague, and part of the Saturday Night Live cast, was already trying to hold back his laughter when she added, “Because he wanted to be in "pole" position at least once this season.” 

The crowd hollered in laughter, and Anthony almost couldn’t hold his own back.

“This one got me, I gotta give it to you that this is way funnier than whatever I had for tonight,” he bantered.

“It’s a live show for a reason, right?” she winked and turned back to the camera. 

Yn was dating Charles for over a year now, and he was a constant topic of her jokes, the audience, and fans were used to her always roasting him, but everyone knew it to be just part of their relationship. Yn being sassy and playful as she was would make fun of whoever she was close enough to know her jokes wouldn’t come off as offensive. 

Charles loved that side of her. It was nice to have someone who would cry with you but also make you laugh and take the hardships of life with a degree of lightness. 

It was race week, Yn was in the paddock and it wasn’t uncommon for some channels to call upon her for a quick interview about her thoughts on the race. She usually wouldn’t mind, she would be polite as usual, answer their questions, sometimes even tell a joke or two and then follow her path back to Charles if he was free to have her around. 

This time, however, this interview seemed to stress her more than to amuse her. 

“We all know he can do better-”

“Can he?!” Yn asked, brows furrowing a challenging look on her face. “With Ferrari’s current strategy, I don’t think he can.” 

“Well, most people seem to think he could, and I tend to believe that maybe that’s right. It’s not always the team’s fault.” 

“Eric, have you tried driving a formula one car?” 

The reporter gaped, taken aback by Yn’s question, before answering, “Well, no, I’m a journalist.”

“If you’re so sure he could do better, then maybe you should go there and try driving the car. See which position you get,” she kept her instance, lips pursed in a tight line. 

The reporter chuckled, trying to light the situation, but Yn didn’t, and everyone watching the live interview saw the tension in the air. Everyone got the message: nobody downplays her boyfriend in front of her. There’s a line between making fun when it’s known Charles is comfortable and openly talking about how he could do better in a sports program. 

taglist: @sachaa-ff @mickslover @formulakay3 @mishaandthebrits @crimeshowjunkie @iloveyou3000morgan @saintlewis @fdl305 @chaoticevilbakugo @carojasmin2204 @wondergirl101ks @smiithys

[crippled-peeper]

hey sorry if this is rude or annoying but

is it rude to vent about my chronic pain if i've gotten physical therapy in the past?

i have mild scoliosis (about 13°) but due to several other conditions it puts me in medium or high levels of pain daily. Sometimes it can be unremarkable enough that I can almost ignore it, but often it's still keeping me in bed or even on the floor.

I told one of my online friends about how I was on the floor again and couldn't get up, and they got very aggravated wiht me for calling my pain chronic when I could still move around and walk, and then they got very irate over me venting when I've had help for it in the past

I'm just not sure what to do. I feel awful that it's taking them longer to get physical therapy (they're on a wait-list) but I'm upset that they said some very harsh things while admonishing my actions.

I apologize if this is silly, I just trust you as a source of information and thought I may ask someone who can be less biased than a close friend of mine would (that's also why i'm on anon as we have held a few conversations)

Aw man your friend just kinda sounds like they suck??? I am baffled by the idea that you are somehow supposed to be all good now and disability-free just by doing PT. You still have scoliosis. You still have pain. It’s not a cure.

The end-goals for physical therapy can vary from individual to individual (I did PT for 6 months prior to my spinal fusion - they wanted me to have a strong back before doing such a huge surgery) but virtually nobody graduates from PT ablebodied or completely pain-free. It would be awesome if that were true but it just isn’t.

PT is supposed to help you build strength to get you through daily tasks and to improve your quality of life. Sometimes it is done in preparation for a big procedure. It is very important for recovery from many things but it’s not a magic bullet.

Ur friends feelings of frustration about being forced to wait for PT are valid… but they’re not your fault or responsibility to fix. They are allowed to be upset and mad about it. They’re allowed to vent and rant. But taking it out on you? Nonsensical. You had nothing to do with the system that forces disabled people to wait for care. You just happen to be a person who got PT for your condition.

[shaisuki]

ADDICTION

|| the second entry for the series “𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐖𝐄 𝐃𝐎 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄”

content warnings ─── bonten! sanzu, murder, talks about torture, noncon, implied kidnapping, drugs , dark themes, yandere themes

ᝰ synopsis.ᐟ when colored pills doesn't give him the high he needed, sanzu finds a new addiction, it's better than ecstasies.

the gunshot seem to frighten you. i apologize for that. in line of my "business" it is my job to keep the empire mikey had built to flourish. these traitors are not the worth of the name bonten and those who are without use should perish.

it's also to serve a warning to you. never run away from me.

i have no intention of harming you, let alone scare you. it's only a reminder that you can never escape from me, even you run to the ends of the world, i will follow you.

shed the blood of those who dares to look at you. serve their head in a platter. cut every finger who dares to lay their hands on you. rip their limbs apart one by one and not even death could escape their fate from my hands.

why are you crying? you don't like that? silly girl. it's a punishment for them who can't understand that you belong to me. what? can you repeat that? you don't want me nor anything of this?

you got no choice. you've bewitched me. got me high of my feelings that i didn't know i was capable of doing so. you've made me addicted to the sensation of your skin in mine. your voice like bells in my ears. no drugs could make me feel like the way you do.

you're the most potent drug that i could take. intoxicating me with your light that flows in my veins and gives me euphoria reaching in my brain. you're the medicine in my pain.

sometimes you're also the cause of the aches in my body. you never really learn do you? what got you shaking? the body drops as i pull the trigger on his head. blood pooling at those empty head of this incompetent fool to never let you out of sight when i'm dealing with mikey.

this is a warning. don't test me. although, i vowed myself to never harm you—you need to be taught a lesson. nobody messes with me, no one.

ssh. don't cry. this is all your fault. you're going to take whatever i give to you. fuck! i might lose control of myself whenever those tiny whimpers leave your mouth as i pressed my lips to your heated skin. be a good girl. all i want for you is to submit to me.

tears won't work on me darling, i've seen plenty of it. from the men who for me to spare their useless lives with a gun in my hand. it would be no different to you. you're mine to begin with. i own you.

a blissful sigh escaping from my lips as i inhale your scent. such beautiful hair you have. such bounty you have for yourself and it's mine to exploit.

the straps of your nightgown falling down to your round shoulders the more my lips move to feel of your skin. this would be your life with me as i clothe you with the most luxurious clothes i can provide for you. money ain't a problem for me. i have lots of them.

your body trembles as i touch you. i won't harm you, i told you. think of this as a lesson while you think of escaping me again. there's no escape in my grasps. as much i hate to force you, this is your punishment for making me angry. if you weren't my precious little things—i would have killed you.

we won't like that don't we? stay still. it would be easy for me to take you or else it would hurt. never been a problem for me to put down people like you.

that's it. you weren't that stubborn when i'm putting you in your place. that's right. the sight of you sinking in the sheets with your hands gripping the sheet while you brace yourself for me to take you. your plump ass raised to serve me.

eyes rolling as i sink to your warm pussy. engulfing me in such warmth that got me hooked, wishing forever to be inside you and now we are as one. connected to fulfill our desires and to feed my addiction.

i hope you learned your lesson with this one or else i'll be doing it until it get through your thick skin. i won't get tired of it nor will i ever stop.

this is what addiction to you feels like. a neverending rush of euphoria.