#it’s first few messages consists of a bunch of idiots trying to get me to unblock them on twitter

[kaywavy]

[lovee-infected]

Hello!! Can I request headcanons about gn mc who got sick (with fever or something to the point they can't go to school) and the twst boys decided to visit and take care of them? I've always enjoyed your headcanon! Thank you!!

Riddle Rosehearts

He's got much of a weak immune system himself so he's usually prepared for unexpected situations like this. He knows what to do.

Just lay back against your pillow, do exactly as he says and you'll return to full health in no time

He'd probably be really angry if he finds you out of bed without his permission or spending too much time over your phone and reading books; he insists on you resting and much as possible.

He agrees on being possibly a -bit- over protective but he doesn't mind. If this will do any good at your healing process then he's more than okay with it.

Whenever you tell him to stop over stressing himself because of you he just goes: " Me ? Over stressing? Of course not! If you wish me to be calmer than I already am, then stop playing around and rest well till you get better."

He truly does work his hardest for you while you need him, from takings notes of what has been teached during your absence to spending at least 2 hours a day with you, making sure that nothing goes wrong.

As the strict leader of Heartslabyul, he usually spends most of the day watching over students and checking whether they are doing good at school and exams or not, but for now he cuts back on these responsibilities to take care of you. He may not shout that out loudly, but he always puts you before any other responsibilities he might have. Perhaps he enjoys spending time with you just as much as he enjoys having fresh strawberry tarts.

Trey Clover

You were still trying to catch up with the classes but Trey just knew that it'd be too much. It was him who made you forget about the school and instead, rest in your room.

You are a bit stressed out about not being able to take care of your chores, but thankfully he is there for you. He isn't known as heartslabyul's mother for no reason, make sure that he knows how to caress and pamper you better than anyone else.

Aside checking on you every day and bringing you additional medicines and food, he makes sure to collect notes of everything that is teached during your apsence so you won't have problems catching up with the studies afterwards . No need to mention that his cooking on the other hand is stunning, 5 star chef Trey at your service.

He understands that it might be a bit boring laying down in bed without anyone to talk to, so he often comes to you as you need someone to talk to and also brings you your favorite books to read so you won't get any bored when he can't be there.

He never says a word to make you feel any bad or frustrating about being nursed by him, instead he knows how to motivate you to get better even sooner: " Nursing you is absolutely adorable, but I don't want my dear (y/n) stuck in a bed all day while I'm willing to show you way more exciting things than a just couple of books,"

Cater Diamond

Clones, clones and clones :Time to get to work! The best part with it is that he can always make sure to have at least one of his clones watching over you even if he's busy with school or stuff, not that he lets you know what he's doing though.

You wonder why Cater's staying with you 24/7, as a third year student, isn't he supposed to be like, really busy with studying? Cater assures you that there's nothing to worry about, and it seriously isn't. He can always catch up with everything even his actual self stays all night at yours.

While his use of clones might seem a bit tricky, he still makes sure to provide you with anything you as long as you're sick need and even more: Bringing you roses and chibi, stuffed animals as gifts, along with sweet chill chats whenever you're awake, sending you soft love quotes with a bunches of colorful hearts and kisses via text even as he's right beside you, He enjoys how you'll need to look up your messages to see what he texts you allthough he's sitting just a few meters away from you. Aw, the way you blush whenever youlok at your phone, how cute~

Ace Trappola

What's the purpose of going to school when he does not understand a single word of it while his mind is all stuck on you? What are doing now? Are you fine? Does your chest Still hurt? Has your pain gotten any worse? Is there someone with you right now? What if you need help??

He's about to lose his mind, he tries asking someone free to check on you but there doesn't seem to be such a person available at the moment. 'That's it , I'll go on my own'

With the help of the year gang ( Jack, Deuce and Epel) he fakes breaking his leg during a PE session and yeets off the school for an entire week. YES!

He is moving to your place for a couple of days and Deuce will cover up for him whenever someone asks where Ace is.

Ace just knows that you're sick, he isn't sure of the exact name or type of your illness. On his way to yours, he fills a bag with anything he finds at Heartslabyul's cabinets with any title as -medicine- for you. He'll later look for the right one you need between them.

When you get to look into what he has brought, you aren't sure if he's kidding or not and when you ask, Ace realizes that he's really goofed up: what he actually brought was nothing else than animal medicines, and he he literally brought you each and every of them existing in Heartslabyul; how come didn't he see the pets/only label-??

You're lucky that you already have your medicines prepared, so you tell him not to worry about it. He feels so damn embarrassed wanting to melt into earth right now, but you have to admit he really lifted up your mood. You're happy to have your cute, Crabby-haired idiot besides you while you're sick, and he tries his best to help you with cooking and making sure of you taking your right medicines on time to make up for the mess he made on his first day:" Ehehe...at least...you can use some of them when Grim gets sick, right ?"

Deuce Spade

He really wants to stay there taking care of you but... he has to go to school as well. He has to get much higher grades this semester if he doesn't want to have to spend another year as a first year.

He can't skip any of classes, but promises to spend the rest of his day after school.

He rushes with his school uniform still on to your place, not wanting to be even a second late . He has to carry some casual clothes along with his books since he wants to stay over nights if you need him.

Due to get getting in trouble a lot back at the time, he's rather educated in medical field so he knows much and less of what he'll need to do as you're sick?

His cooking isn't something he can rely on so he goes to Trey, telling that he needs some soup for Ace since he seems to be looking a bit sick lately?

He prepares your food, brings you warm towels, repeatedly checks your body temperature and when you're finally asleep, gets to his own studies. He ends up Having fewer than 3 hours of night sleep multiplr times and once, he didn't get any sleep at all.

He tries his hardest to look his best in front of you so you won't notice how terrible he actually is; when you question the bags under his eyes, he claims them to be left from the mascara which a couple of guys put on him a few days ago for fun and consistently laughs. Damn, this boy doesn't even know how to lie huh? He is literally dying, but he won't tell you a word. He can handle worse...

When you finally return to full health you realize how terrible he's been doing lately and you take rule of his nurse this time. Making sure that your cinnamon roll would finally get some sleep.

Leona Kingscholar

"My room, now". You look way too terrible to be able to make it to the classes therefore he has to make sure that you won't do anything stupid while you need to be taking some rest.

Bringing you to his own room wasn't his main intention since he just wanted to keep an eye on you but couldn't afford to visit you everyday if you didn't live any close to him so, easiest solution to the problem would be you staying with him.

He lets you use his bed but keeps on reminding you that it's just because you're sick so you better not be expecting such things to ever happen again. He would fall asleep in less than a minute at whatever he lays his head on, so sleeping on the ground isn't as hard as it seems. He just had to make sure that you would't step on him or his tail when you walk out of the bed.

He can ask Ruggie to nurse you and all, but decides to do most of your stuff on his own because it'd be a lot worse if Ruggie too gets sick. Sharing the same room with you has already put him on a pretty high infection risk so, that wouldn't really matter if he's the one nursing you or not. He doesn't really mind getting sick either, a free chance to take some days off school and chill; why not ?

He turns out to be pretty good with board games and there's no need to worry about getting bored while you can go for 100+ chess matches with Leona winning you each and every time; a bit ironic, but entertraining nonetheless.

He's actually really enjoying spending time with you, but isn't really expressing it. The only time when he actually shows some direct affection is when he plants secret kisses on your forehead as you're asleep.

Ruggie Bucchi

He has grown up in an awfully poor family with multiple siblings, so he's pretty familiar to the pain of seeing those you hold dear sick .He has turned into a not only responsible but also supportive boy toward friends and family, so you can make sure that he can take the best care of you while you're sick.

Perhaps his only problem is...Leona. He'd need Ruggie around even during school time and the hyena boy can't even have a full 30 minutes away from him which makes it impossible for Ruggie to take his time checking on you at least once a day.

Well, he has to find a way to babysit both of you at the same time so, -Let's take you to his own room-

Great ! He no longer needs to worry now that he can take care of you both. Leona too agrees on you staying at his as long as you don't cause any trouble.

Poor Ruggie has to sleep on the floor but assure you that he rarely gets to be the one sleeping on bed back in the home so, he is kinda used to sleeping on the cold ground.

He knows how to cook? Much and and less of it but who cares? He just asks you what you want and returns with it in 30 minutes; guess why: Because he'd just borrow the food from someone else. He doesn't mind his dirty ways indeed, you're sick so, you're more important than some dude wanting to chill on his food during lunchtime.

He just takes a list of medicines you may need and returns with all of them in his bag. He has to come at the right time on his own every time you have to take any of them since you'd most likely either fall asleep or forget to take them on time.

Enjoy your time with him, because it's gonna be a real luxury. He'd treat you nothing less than the way he treats Leona as he's sick so, you may consider yourself a part of a royal family at his service.

Jack Howl

Fluffy tsundere wolf is ready to give up on all he's got for you, what on earth might be sweeter than this ?

The moment, no, the second he realizes that you're not feeling well, Jack would immediately take you to the nurse office to see if you're. It's such a relief that it isn't thst serious, all you need to do is to take some rest.

Meanwhile you're resting in bed, he'll do the shopping and asks the kitchen for some soup ( You're sick you can't have too salty or sweet foods like normal cafeteria meals ) He gives up on his own meal to get some for you instead, it's just hunger of course he can handle it.

He feeds you and makes sure that you'll finish your entire meal, reminds you to take your medicines on time, brings you your favorite books to read and, most importantly, listens to... anything you'd ask him for.

He hardly ever lets anyone touch his ears or tail but if it's you, why not? You even fall asleep hugging his tail like a doll and he just patiently waits for you to wake up, blushing as he appreciates how cute you look while asleep.

Damn he has to keep the distance otherwise he as well would end up being sick but, it just seems impossible to say no when you ask for cuddles.

Jack tells you stories of his home town and national legends making your mouth drop in fascination. His stories seem to amaze him just as they amaze you and it makes him unbelievably happy to see you liking things he's been appreciating all over his life.

He even gets to the point of talking about his will to become all mighty and strong just like the magicians he looks up to, especially Leona. Just watching his strength gives you the will to overcome your illness and be at least a bit like Jack; he's really great, isn't he?

Azul Ashengrotto

No no no- Unacceptable! You shouldn't be sick, you shouldn't -get- sick- He told you to watch what you eat and what you wear as it's raining out there - HE TOLD YOU A MILLION TIMES- But now what? You are sick.

Azul panicks, he keeps on exaggerating the whole thing even if it's just a normal cold. He just isn't the type to easily deal with sicknesses. Whenever he catches a cold, it'll take him weeks to return to full health due to how weak his body is and, he's so worried about you being the same.

Soup, warm water bath, Medicines , magic potions to reduce the fever, ultimate revival spells... he showers you in all of them. Even if the virus won't kill you Azul's overprotection will most likely do, and he'll get really mad if you tell him that he's exaggerating it.

When you regain half of your full health, you ask him to let you return to school and- He immediately pits you back in bed: "No leavings, not until you're done with this troublesome fever or whatever."

You feel like an adult forced to stay in a cradle and wear diapers meanwhile Azul thinks that you're too naive to take your health seriously.

When you finally manage to pull him over, you realize how sick and pale he's gotten since you got sick. The bags under his eyes proved that he hasn't been getting much of sleep recently. "God what have you done to yourself-"

You finally tell him that he's the one who needs help , not you. You plant a kiss on his cheek and force his head to your lap, wanting him to get some sleep. He slowly understands that he might've been taking it a bit too seriously, but since you are fine now, he's kinda glad that he took it hard on you. He just wants you to be safe and sound; even if his it's going to cost his own health on the first placd.

Jade Leech

Humans get sick? It's pretty rare of aquatic creatures, especially eels to get sick so Jade's pretty new to this . 'wow , pathetic , aren't humans?' he thinks . Well anyway he can't just stand back and make fun humans while you seem to be in serious pain, but what can he do? He still has a lot to learn about human life and it's his first time having one of them sick, oh man.

Well, they tell that you should get some...rest ? Well maybe he should take you to bed. First step done , let's go for the rest. He blocks several of his classmates in the corners asking for... information. He simply takes notes . Possibly useful medicines and meals, hours of sleeping, allowed activities, useful tips, warnings, etc.

He has to read the list several times to make sure that he's got it all right. Let's nurse (y/n).

He unexpectedly goes from 0 to 100 like bam- bye eel boy hello nurse Leech. He'll turn your room into a hospital room, a good one though, filled with dolls and flowers and anything he was told to add because they send away positive vibes.

His cooking on the other hand is amazing. He'll look for several light meals for sick bodies but- chooses those which match your tastes . You can't help but to love everything he cooks . Chef's kiss.

He changes your bed pillow and cloths everyday, returning with washed, silky pillows and covers . A warm, smooth bed is what you need for a good sleep.

If there was such a status he would've been the god of nursing; wow you would've needed pay him off a lot for his service if he wasn't giving it all to his darling for free.

When you finally regain your health, he just has one more question left to ask before leading you to your daily classes: "Now now dear, would you mind rating me , and my nursing service?"

seem like he's really curious to see whether he's done it correctly or not.

Floyd Leech

Things seem so uncool when you're not as energetic as always , pale skin as if you're choking on lack of oxygen and bizarreness in your movements like a doll, smh, so boring.

Just like Jade, he's pretty new to surface life and watching you bear with illness looks pretty weird in his eyes?

When Jade, finally, informs him on what exactly happens to human body while struggling with an illness and what he must do to you to get rid of this annoying mode, he understands. Floyd still finds human's body shitty for how weak it is but decides to use Jade's words as a guide to deal with you.

A warm bed, fluffy pillows and stuffed animals, these seemed to be enough for step one: Enough of rest and sleep. He can't blame you on this one though, sleeping is always amazing. Something that never gets boring. Everything seems to be pretty fine to begin with, sadly it won't last any longer than a few hours-

He's told to bring you food, but when he returns with 4 bags filled with chocolate, candy, soda and chips; it's obvious that he didn't get the point correctly. Jade explains that your body is still way to weak for too salty or sweet foods, even highly cooked meals would worsen your immune system and make it take much longer to be healed.

Floyd goes for a second pick up and this time: this time returns with raw potatoes and frozen meat- Raw potatoes and frozen meat-. Well, he just followed everything Jade told him...? Neither too salty nor to sweet, and raw because Jade told him not to bring over-cooked stuff. Even if the virus did you no harm you would've probably died under his food selections if Jade wasn't there to stop him...

While his food choices might be horrible, Floyd's still one of the best mutuals you can have close when you aren't feeling well. With him beside you, giggling and chuckling as he rambles on how boring his day was, you've got to admit that you'd rarely feel sick when he's around. Although you're sick at the moment, nothing seems to have changed between the two of you, he enjoys spending time with you now just as much as he enjoys it when you're all safe and sound.

Well...maybe he can't be the best nurse you'd get to have , but one thing's for sure: No one can ever make you laugh like he does and, you know what say: Laughter is the best medicine~

Kalim al asim

He can't be any more worried, he stresses out whenver a friend is sick and now, it's not just a friend, it's -you-, one of the dearest and closest ones Kalim had ever had; just how can he keep calm ???

He is being raised under severe health protection and hardly ever catches even a simple cold, several people had taught him strict health routines and he had to follow them all over his life, so he is considerably familiar with ways of overcoming and illness , and that's what he's here for!

Jamil forbids him from cooking since it's too dangerous if he needs to use any knifes, but that wouldn't hold him back from finding enormous food recipes based on your favorite condiments to make your meal more pleasant.

He makes sure to prepare anything you need in a matter of seconds, golden peacock or 5000 camels, doesn't matter ! He's got way more than enough and what use would be better than giving them to you?

He can take care of you on his own, but Jamil insists on Kalim leaving it all to him and stay away from you as much as possible (No need to mention the high risk of infection for Kalim since he's almost sticking to you all the time)

Jamil as well would caress you meanwhile you rest at Scarabia (Right, Kalim proudly brought you there ) and Kalim, makes sure to stay close to you as much as he can, mostly when Jamil isn't around to tell him off- He doesn't want to put Jamil in more trouble but, you are his first priority.

You're bound to your bed, but just having Kalim around brings way more fascinating adventures than what you might get to see out there. His stories really do show you to a whole new world and takes the pain in your lungs and chest way further that your mind could catch . Perhaps Kalim is he one and only who can make your mind fly, even as your body's laying lifelessly in bed.

Jamil Viper

For the first time, someone stressed him out more than Kalim always does. He's always expecting to be scared to death because of him, but because of you? Damn he didn't see this coming.

Depending on what your illness is, he manages to freak out even more or clam himself down to his sane self, but the main point is how he's got to serve you all the best until you're totally safe.

He soon prepares any kind of medicine and chemical you may need and you have to use them all properly, don't even think of rejecting any single one of them otherwise Jamil would force feed you: "Don't be such a baby, you won't get any better unless you have these"

Just like Azul, he might be a bit overprotective with your health since he doesn't even let you leave the bed for more than a few minutes. He insists on you avoiding any sort of activities that may be tiring or heavy to your body.

To be honest, the thought of using his snake whisper on you when you don't behave or ask him to stop being so strict over a simple illness crosses his mind. Luckily, he refuses to use it. You're still his lover that'd be too heartless of him to take advantage of you like this just because you can't see how much he loves you.

He needs to keep the distance, but has to admit that it can be really hard to avoid hugging and kissing all over your face when you're gazing at him with that sweet smile.

Having you close makes Jamil realize how affectionate he actually is: How much he misses the healthy and happy you who he was never in a danger. Well maybe this nursing days gives him a lesson to at least try to have some sweeter time with you while you are all safe and sound - and not tiredly laying in your bed.

Vil Schoenheit

You can consider yourself nothing less than a Prince/ Princess when Vil of all people is caressing you. Your body is still way too weak to have control of anything going on in your life at the moment, and that's how Vil takes control over all of them- all in your life. Which means that you now have to live and do as he wishes.

He will take no effort in turning you into one of the fairest of all students in school (Not that you'll ever reach him though) as long as he can have his eyes over you. His rules are way more than just -beauty- ; just as he can be the all fair and powerful Queen who steps on you, he knows how to play the role of the nurse like a Queen would do~

A royal maiden is only to serve the royal family, so it's time to show how much of a princess /prince you can be in bed. You don't need to worry about your medicines or meals since Vil's always organized and on time with them, not to mention that his cooking too seems to be pretty good. He uses light yet, nutritious recipes that you'd enjoy and you're really surprised because these kinds food don't really look tasty.

Perhaps he just needed an excuse all this time to get this close to you, so he can take care of anything he's been dreaming to do with you all this time. Pedicure and manicure, trying on new fruit masks, resting face and body muscles to have a smoother, cleaner skin, etc.

Your room is a beauty salon at this point and you usually forget that you're actually sick.

He works on not only your physical beauty but also your manners, he doesn't care if you're sick or not . It's the best time to take away your poor manners and habits.

Well the scary Queen has got his own soft spots too; while indirectly giving you beauty lessons, he enjoys teasing you as you sometimes look pretty naive and new to all dos and don'ts of a high-level life like his, and he's more than pleased to teach you: "Pull yourself together , potato."

Rook Hunt

He isn't really into the whole nursing game but- If it's an opportunity to stalk caress and admire you all night, why not?

He is lowkey familiar with the basics so, it isn't supposed to be that difficult to handle . Finding pills and medicines isn't hard either since they can all be found at mister S's shop. ( He would've liked it better if he had to get them from a moster or something, anything more adventurous)

Though he doesn't really like quiet and safe journeys he'd actually appreciate it if it's with you. And of course, he won't let anyone else take advantage. Let it just be with the two of you and all~

He isn't about to hurt or scare you in any sort way; it's true that he just loves it when things get a bit dangerous but, he knows how to manage excitement as well. You want him to be a soft gentleman? Then that's what he's going to be.

Rook would be the softest Rook you could've ever imagined when he plays the nurse. It can't even be called nursing: It's about a passionate lover spending all his time with his darling who isn't feeling well. Even his expressions are taken to a totally different level, the mysterious smile he always puts on is replaced with a worried and, mildly sad gaze that makes your heart melt.

Might sound too dramatic bug he may even sing you to sleep. Sweetest words ever dancing to the rhythm of his unique accent that make your cheeks hurt at trying not to blush. This isn't the only drama he's up to though, even his normal speaking often ends up with your mind drowning in feelings. He won't bother giving you soft kisses on hand and forehead when you don't expect it. He likes surprising you, even if it's in a romantic way.

And...the real Rook, is only out when you're asleep. Sitting on a chair just a few inches away from your bed, a pair of eyes carefully follow the pace of your chest as it rises and falls. He's never tired, a huntsman gets no sleep as long as his prey's close by. Wow, if sweetness is all he needed to approach you, then he should give it a try more often~

Epel Felmier

His first reaction to hearing of you being sick is summarised in :Gasping, Blushing, Questioning, Sad puppy eyes. "It's just a simple fever...right? (Y/n) will soon be better..." , Epel confronts himself. He isn't getting overly emotional, but when it comes to you, he does have a sensitive spot.

At first, it is his anxiety over your health that makes him want to come over to your house to check up on you everyday but , it soon ends up being more serious. What if this is an opportunity to prove his reliability? You'd finally get to see how much of a strong and helpful man he can be. Even as he looks soft.

While Epel's trying his hardesr to seem a tough as possible, you can't help but to adore his cuteness as he is doing his best while you're sick. He bakes you the best of apple pies you've ever had and you have to admit; being sick can't hold you back from enjoying the sweet taste of fresh, caramelized baked apples melting in your mouth.

Growing up to be a country boy, he never really relied on chemicals as a useful cure to any illnesses. He's more into organic ways of helping human body into regaining its lost energy, which can be put as : 1) Healthy food 2) Enough of sleep and rest 3) Lifted up spirits and enough of humor. He'd be really protective over the last option, he wants to make sure that your self-esteem and spirits would be way better than ever

He has to keep the distance, but some small cuddles would not hurt, right? Perhaps some small forehead kisses before bedtime too. He's still pretty uncomfortable with kisses but, since you're sick...that can be counted as an exception.

Idia Shroud

He's been away from humanity for too long; long enough to almost forget that humans get sick. Robots sometimes have their codings crashed or their gears damaged, that's when they'll need an engineer to repair them . How did the cure system work with humans?? He can't really remember. Due to spending time with almost nobody except Ortho (who happens to be a robot) and hardly ever leaving his room and as the result, barely getting sick, Idia is pretty new to human body's metabolism; he isn't sure of what he might be able to do for you. But, humans have something called...immune system, right? Ah something that heals body on its own. Well maybe relying on that would be enough.

He decides to give you some far distance support instead of comimg all way down to your dorm . He can't be any more happier of technology's existence for such cases. Your immune system can heal you on its own, all he've got to do is to send some motivation your way. The summary of most of his extremely motivational texts would be : "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger! Keep it up (y/n)!!👊✨💥" and when you reply telling him how terrible you're feeling he'd just try to look for strongers sentences-

He repeatedly mistakes humans and robots and accidently texts you:" why don't you get someone to repair you?" several times. Then goes to bang his head against the wall realizing how dumb he's acting.

When you get worse he gives up. Maybe those sentences wasn't enough of motivation . Idia really does want to come visit you in person but he seems to be bound to his area. Well at least, Ortho isn't, right? He comes up with a way better idea to program Ortho to take care of you while Idia can't do it himself. He copied hundreds of anatomy, human biology and medicine to Ortho's data list. Well that seems to be enough. He can now cook, wash clothes, brings you your medicines and most importantly, remain by your side all the time as you may need help. Idia puts s small camera on Ortho so he'd be able to watch what's going on as long as you need Ortho's his help. He feels quite guilty for not showing up on his own but- maybe it's just better this way. Coming in person would do no good but him freaking out at not knowing what to do which would end up in making you feel worse. Long distance watch as he controls Ortho around is way better, even if he has to keep his eyes on tablet 24/7. He cuts back on his sleeping to make sure that nothing would go wrong. Even long distance watch seems to be stressful at this point...

He does care about you, a lot, but right now, he's no prepared to show physical affection. Let him show his love through his very own ways, he's just taking baby steps with you <3

Malleus Draconia

"Now now little one, don't give in so easealy. I know you're stronger than this..." Malleus motivates you. You certainly aren't going to die just because of a simple fever but still, wow. Humans -are- truly weak and fragile. He shouldn't really be caring for a mortal being especially if it's a human, but you are an 'exception'; you always are.

He could just leave you to Lilia and Sebek and you would've been under their watch and care 24/7, but he prefers to do this on his own since you are his favorite creature. He doesn't mind seeing how you'd overcome the pain even if it's with a simple cold. He wants to get more of you and your expressions.

He doesn't really have much to do, magic can do it all. All it takes to turn your depressing room into a prince/princess's dreamy bedroom is a twist of a finger. Go on and tell him what you want , you shall have in within a second. "All the best for you, child of man~"

While his significant magic skills are all truly stunning and helpful, his presence on his own seems to be the best part of him nursing you. He is your tsunotarou, afterall~ Not the descendant of Mistress of all Evil but only when it comes to you.

Sometimes he'd make you wish you'd stay in bed forever and ever, all to have him here, by your side. Just to have his soft, slender fingers brushing against your cheek and playing with the tip of your hair.

He does talk, but most of the time being is spent in silence since he doesn't want to bother you if it's hard for you to talk. He may pretend to be busy with something else but it's just to take your mind over the fact that he's watching you all the time. His small gestures are just as sensual as his words. Kisses on forehead, locking his dragon eyes with you , brushing your soft hair with hand as you lay on his shoulder (not that he cares about keeping the distance although you're sick. Your human illnesses are way too weak to do any harm to him, anyway~ )

His favorite time of the day is when you're asleep. You're adorable and lovely all time but, your sleeping pose, it's unimaginably beautiful to him. Watching your calm face empty of any emotion followed by the calm, yet, organized pace in your breathing as your chest falls and rises. He barely gets any sleep during the night, he doesn't need it. Watching you is way more pleasing: "Sweet dreams, my precious little human~"

Lilia Vanrouge

The most experienced, dedicated nurse here. He's been raising many of baby faes and struggling with a young, fireball shooter baby Malleus over the years. Nursing a fragile ill human like you is no more than a warm-up for him.

Chill on your bed and let him take care of everything, from the warm towels to fluffy blankets and pillows. Smooth music playing in your room as you take short naps, plushies and teddy bears around your bed giving you feelings of a newborn baby sleeping in a warm and fancy bed.

That's not all, along with his professional nursing skills, having Lilia himself around would take it all to a whole new level. He is so full of contrasts; Young and old, quite and wild, wise and careless, serious and silly and probably hundreds of other adjectives you can name.

Where else would you find a nurse who'd play you your favorite rock tracks on his guitar in the afternoon while at night, brings you cookies and hot milk to have while listening to his old but -gold- stories before going to sleep?

Lilia has got it all, old, new, calm, wild, and perhaps that's how it's never boring when he's the one you are spending time with. 'Sickness with benefits' to call. But, don't forget his horrible cooking skills.

Better hide some canned food under your pillow to save yourself from starvation when he's not around, refuse to eat his food st any cost (otherwise you'll need another 2 week hospitalized because of food poisoning-)

Make sure to thank your adorable bat nurse when you're back to full health; even if your stomach's still in pain because of his nasty cooking.

Silver

It's...his first time taking care pf someone. He is neither experienced nor educated when it comes to human health... especially because of how he's been living with fairies (who barely get sick) all over his life. The only reliable source for him would be his own memories; how Lilia used to take care fo him when he was a child. There isn't much he can remember but that'd do

Nursing doesn't seem to be that hard when he actually gives it a try - Mostly about you sleeping all day. Wow if sleeping this much is considered to be a symptom of being sick, then Silver himself has to be sick as hell 24/7. He isn't really sure if that's concerning or not

He is doing good since he seems go be pretty responsible and calm toward the whole thing, but don't expect him to be on time.

Silver wants to make sure that you'll take your medicines on time but he often fails to. He oversleeps most of the time and when he's up, he'd panic knowing that you missed your hourly medicine again.

He'd lowkey feel frustrated and useless when he misses stuff because of his sleeping issues, especially when it comes to you. He have to go for a stronger method so, he ends up in using 7 different clocks and alarms to make sure that he won't miss anything anymore; you're sick. He has to do all his best to take care of you. Nobody matters more than you do. Alarm clocks he uses are freaking loud and give him a heart attack whenever he uses them to wake up. Poor guy would need a long sleep when you're better.

He often falls asleep next to your bed after making sure that you are having a peaceful night sleep. He places a goodnight kiss on your forehead lays his head at the bottom of your bed. Who knows, maybe he would dream of you tonight, again.

Sebek Zigvolt

There's no way that you'd ever come close to master Malleus but- he still cares for you, a lot. Perhaps as much as he cares for Malleus although he refuses to confess to it. He is trained and skilled for all possible emergencies so he's all prepared to take the best possible care of you and make sure that you'll return to full health in no time.

He just knows what he is doing and makes sure that things would run smoothly. He is keeping each and every aspect in consideration and can organize everything like no one else can. From your sleeping schedule to light exercises required as you're sick. He insists on you starting to develop a better life style so that you won't end up in bed and lose time like this.

It's nice to have someone keeping the balance of your life when you need it, but when it's Sebek we're talking about, know that he might go a bit -too far- with it. He'd be overly protective and strict while you need a considerable deal of sympathy and softness too since you're sick - He collects notes of everything that was teached while you were sick and brings them to you to study, telling you that it'd be impossible to keep up with the rest of the lessons unless you study them right now, in your bed. And when you complain of it being hard to read and sit due to how weak your body is, he returns with the solution: Audio books (He isn't giving up... deal with it )

Studying isn't your only issue: he's being protective over each and every muscle you move. He'd wake you up early in the morning for a light, morning work out and doesn't let you out of the bed for the rest of the day. Whenever you complain, that's what his answer would be: " Master Lilia has blessed me with these , gloriously impressive lessons he's learned through experiences within his long- lasting life!! I believe in his words from the bottom and there's surely no cure greater than this if he says so" poor boy isn't considering he possibility of Lilia tricking him again at all.

This puppy means good, even if he fails to show it as great as you might be expecting him to. In fact he is just following all that he's told to, meanwhile he's pretty inexperienced and new to it. You may find it a bit unfair but, consider that he would've never gone out of his way to take care of you for plenty of hours everyday if it wasn't for you (Or Malleus-) seeing you sad on its own gives him wet puppy vibes let alone having you sick . He may act like a coward but, it's all because of how much you mean to him.

[kookicrumbs]

╰ pink love

pairing: jungwon x fem!reader genre: fluff word count: 2985 warnings; like one super minor curse word (hell)! just some cutesy stuff for ya today! summary: jungwon and y/n go on a build-a-bear date! a/n: i really wanted to do something sweet beacuse i love fluff a whole lot, so please enjoy c:

“Are we there yet?” I pout, tugging on Jungwon’s sweater. I attempt to sway him with my best puppy eyes, but he continues walking, pulling me along with him.

“This honestly reminds me of a movie,” He laughs out, “Since when did asking a million times get us there faster?”

I’m not actually that annoyed, but it’s fun to tease him. “What if this is all a movie? Ya think we can break the fourth wall?”

“I don’t know, I’d consider us powerful enough to. If this is a movie, I’m obviously the main character. Since you’re my girlfriend, you can be my sidekick!”

“Ohh, ha, ha, ha. If I’m the sidekick, pigs can fly.”

He puts on a shocked expression, pointing up into the air. “Did I just hear an oink all the way up there?”

“Shut up!” We giggle, shoving each other with our shoulders. Our footsteps match each other as we pad through the open-air mall. Warm sunlight drifts down, encasing us in a soft bubble of relaxation.

“Hey look, I think that’s it!” Jungwon tightens his grip on my hand and we take off towards the familiar shop. As we run, the eyes of other passerbys follow us, but I don’t take the time to feel embarrassed; life’s too short for that.

My legs are shorter than his, so I nearly trip several times. The universe is totally watching out for me today though, because we manage to arrive at the store’s entrance without suffering from a single scratch or bruise.

The Build-A-Bear logo passes overhead as we make our way inside. We are still glued together, buzzing from the excitement of our date. We’re going to make bears for each other! With any other guy I might have found it cheesy, but when Jungwon suggested we do it, my heart fluttered in a strange way.

“Hello! Welcome to Build-A-Bear Workshop! My name is Kiana,” A sunny looking lady welcomes us with a large smile on her face. The cute bobble headband perched on her hair seems to wave at us as well. “Will you two be needing any help today?”

Jungwon throws one arm over my shoulder and presses me tight to his side. His dimples peek out playfully as he responds. “I think we’re okay right now, we’re gonna make some bears for each other. This is my girlfriend!” He looks so proud as our eyes meet, and my stomach twists. Even though we’ve been dating for one and a half years now, whenever he looks at me like that, it feels like the day I first met him.

We’d been at the movie theatre, not together, but coincidentally there on the same day. Jungwon was sitting in the seat in front of me with a couple of his friends, while I was there with my own. His buddies were being idiots and throwing popcorn and other snacks at each other, when a whole bucket came flying at me. Being my easily scared self, I screamed and jumped backwards, simultaneously kicking my legs out and up. It took a few seconds to realize that my feet hadn’t collided with Jungwon’s seat, but instead his head.

I’d been absolutely mortified, and my friends’ muffled laughter didn’t help with that. I’d expected a huge tantrum from him, considering his friends seemed the type to start a huge fight over it, but his reaction was the complete opposite. In fact, he was apologetic and blamed it all on the buffoon who launched the snack at me.

I immediately caught feelings when he laughed and complimented my kick; apparently he knew taekwondo, and he thought I’d be good at it. He got that from a poorly done, unaimed kick to his own skull. To this day, I think I knocked something out of place there, but what can ya do.

Regardless, we ended up exchanging numbers, which is something that confused the hell out my friends and I. A month later, we started going out. I’ve dated some questionable people, so getting the chance to be with someone like Jungwon is a dream come true for me. Another plus, I finally get to check “Build A Bear date” off of my date idea list!

“You guys look adorable together!” Kiana gushed. My cheeks heat up, but not in an awkward way. “We have all our plushes over there. You can take a look and pick one, and then we’ll get that all filled up for you.”

“Thank you!” Jungwon and I say at the same time before strutting towards the plushies.

“We should split up so our bears, or whatever we pick for each other, stays a surprise! Okay?” I’m already looking at each option, and I begin to wonder how I’m ever going to pick just one.

“Since it looks like the queen has already laid claim to this particular piece of territory, I’ll go browse the accessories so I can get your plush decked out in a gorgeous outfit.” He winks and makes his way to the rows of plushie-sized clothing.

The variety of options is amazing. There’s the classic bears, but there’s also other cute things, like lobsters, giraffes, and seals. I’m a sucker for the classics, so I want to pick out a bear for Jungwon.

Two specific bears are in a fight for my love. One is a simple vanilla color with rainbow sprinkle accents, and the other is a pink bear with heart shaped ruffles. Oh god, do I just… buy both? No, that’s be stupid. Eeny meeny miney moe, a classic just like the bear.

I’m not disappointed when my finger lands on the pink bear, meaning I made the right choice and won’t have to switch to the vanilla bear out of a previously hidden lust for it. Awesome.

I peek my head around the aisle and still see Jungwon sorting through racks of outfits. In the time I’d spent picking a plush for him, he grabbed a basket and began filling it with stuff I couldn’t make out. Comfortable with the fact that he isn’t looking, I sneak over to the filling station, the pink bear clutched tightly in my hands.

“Hi! I’d love to get this guy filled, please!” The man working at this station has a name tag that reads, “Jordan”, and he looks equally nice as Kiana.

“Good choice,” He leads me to a filling spot. “Are they for you or for someone else?”

My chuckle causes the worker to smile. I reply while he gathers a few items. “My boyfriend and I came here for a cute date, so it’s for him! This one is super cute so I had to get it for him.”

“Aww, I’ll have to write that down. I'm sure my partner would find it a great idea too!” Jordan sweeps his arm across in a grand gesture, showcasing the variety of hearts and other button-looking objects that sit before him.

“Would you be interested in adding a sound to your bear? You can pick from any of these or you can record your own.”

I pick quickly, sure of what I want to do. “Mm, I’d like to do a recording, if possible. Make it extra special, right?”

“Of course, let me grab that for you and you can record your message!” He gets the heart and let’s me know what to do. Once again making sure Jungwon is not nearby, I record my message and hand it back to Jordan. He puts it in the bear, a small smile playing on his lips. Did he hear me?

“Alright, perfect. Any scents or are you ready to stuff?”

I choose a sweet raspberry scent and get the bear stuffed. It’s fun to push the pedal and see the stuffed animal become plumper, until I finally fill them all the way up. Hugging it feels like hugging a cloud.

I thank Jordan and hide the bear behind my back as I go to the dressing area. Jungwon seems to have moved on, as I spot him at the plushie picking station. I wonder what he’ll get me. Knowing him, it’s going to be adorable.

His eyes meet mine and I suppress a squeal, making sure the bear is out of sight. My strange salute makes him smile and he turns back to picking a plush for me, but not before making sure I won’t look while he gets one.

“So, what would you wear…” I whisper to the pink bear. He seems fashionable and needs something that fits his personality.

Each outfit makes me want to curl up and scream. They’re all so cute and tiny, and I can’t help but want to grab a whole bunch. I create outfits in my head, imagining each on the plushie. Letting the bear try them on seems like a step too far. Instead, I pick up a white button down shirt, pressed pants, little shoes, and a pair of heart shaped sunglasses from my pile and get to dressing.

Putting everything on the pink bear proves to be a struggle. “Come on… tuck in your tummy!” The bear’s legs don’t want to squeeze into the pants I picked. Looks like Build-A-Bear needs more size options. After a somewhat graphic commotion involving lots of pulling, pushing, and whispered yelling, he is finally clothed.

“Jungwon better like what I picked because I don’t think that’s ever coming off.” I brush off my shirt and hope that no one was watching my heated argument with an inanimate object.

I swiftly finish up the washing part of the process, which consisted of pressured air being blown at my plush. I enjoyed seeing the bear’s fur waving around luxuriously. It really fit his vibe. I end up having to consult an employee about what to do next since my amnesiac brain likes to forget simple things: it’s naming time.

After I scan the pink bear’s tag, a naming screen is brought up. I’m given suggestions like Mr. Cuddles, Tiny, and Snuggles, but I choose to make his own name. What do I name you?

Maybe Love? Too plain. Bear? Way too basic. Pink? Pinky? I clearly don’t get around to naming things very often. If it hadn’t been for my siblings, I would have named our dog Cat.

I rack my brain for anything. At this point, the next thing that pops into my head is gonna be his name. No turning back. And my brain provides. Sir Loves-a-lot is inexplicably forged in the depths of my mind, and it shall be the name of this honorable bear.

I imagine a knighting ceremony for Sir Loves-a-lot and enter his name into the computer. It goes through and I get a printed certificate with his name on it. I’m extremely excited to give him to Jungwon and see his reaction.

Jungwon seems to be finishing up at the washing station, so I pay and wait near the entrance of Build-A-Bear. I swing around my finished bear, which is tucked neatly into a bag so Jungwon can’t see it yet. Our date is soon to reach its peak: when we get to see our finished products.

“Hey! Look what I have!” Jungwon skips over to me in a playful manner. His joy envelops me as he gets nearer. His eyes are alight with what looks to be the same thing I’m currently feeling. Is it love?

I show off my bag, my competitive side instantly coming out. “I’ve got yours right here too! If you want to see it… you’ll have to catch me!”

Adrenaline shoots through me as I take off running, Jungwon quickly shifting into a quick runner. My laughs impair my speed as I hiccup and yell, Jungwon’s voice matching my own. We both giggle like idiots while our shoes run thin on the hard ground and our bags crinkle with the whip of the wind.

“Got you!” Jungwon takes care not to throw me onto the ground, instead grabbing my shirt and pulling me to his chest. He lets out an umph as I knock into him full force, still reeling from the sudden shift in direction.

“Jungwon!” A shriek of laughter explodes out of me as we tumble to the concrete with a soft thump. No one is around as we breath off our fit of giggles, still in a heap.

“Looks like my bear made it.” He lifts up his unscatched bag. “Can I say the same of yours?”

A strike of fear hits me, but quickly dissolves when I see my bag looks fine. “I am pleased to report that Combat Bear Number 2 has survived.”

“Combat Bear Number 2? Don’t tell me that’s his name. What a mouthful!” He puts a hand to his chest and sighs dramatically.

“Don’t be stupid, I named him Sir— wait! Don’t try and cheat!” I softly whack him on the shoulder, earning a look of faux-sadness.

“Ouch. But you named him Sir… something. What a noble name! Of course, nothing but the best can come from you.” He holds out the Build-A-Bear bag. “But I’m actually dying to exchange these, so swap?”

“If that isn’t the most relatable thing ever.” I hand him my bag and he gives me his. “You can open mine first!”

“Ooh, don’t mind if I do.” He eagerly opens the bag and pulls out the tissue-paper wrapped bear. The material easily comes off and he holds it up. His eyes seem to glow with delight.

“Oh my gosh.” Jungwon swipes at Sir Loves-a-lot’s fur, fascinated by the heart-shaped ruffles. “He’s so cute! His clothes are... so tight,” His face betrays his confusion, and I snicker as he speaks, “but he looks hella fashionable! I really hope mine will live up to these standards.” He seems to get nervous so I hold his hands to try and calm him down.

“What do you think I named him?”

His mouth shapes into an “O” and he pulls out the certificate. His previously timid face transforms immediately as he reads it.

“Sir Loves-a-lot? Why?! So cheesy but so good!” He crumples onto himself, his head coming to a rest between his knees. I’m overjoyed by his reaction and I press forward to hug his side.

“I love him so much. I’ll cherish him forever.” He looks at me pointedly, almost like he’s trying to tell me something. He switches course though, gesturing to the bag that lies at my feet. “Now open yours!”

I cross my legs to get more comfortable, and I open the bag, wondering what he made for me. My heart dances when I see what he chose. It’s a blue bear with stars in her fur and white wings protruding from her back. I didn’t even see it when I was picking my bear for him.

“Woah…” I hold her up, noticing a soft scent coming from her fur. When I lift the bear up to my nose, I can detect citrus. “Jungwon, you made her smell like lemons! I love lemon… and—and look how pretty! All the stars, and the color… she’s perfect.”

I look at the certificate, all bright and new, and see her name: Mrs. Lovey. Mrs., not Ms.

Jungwon looks at me innocently. “What do you think, am I making my point clear? The future is never far away and I—”

I can’t help but turn away as I feel a prickle in my eyes. Never will I ever cry on a date.

“Awww! Don’t cry, you’ll make me cry!” Jungwon leaps towards me, catching me off-guard. I end up falling backwards with a yelp, but he throws his hand under my head and catches me before I can slam into the concrete.

We stare at each other for what seems like hours but is in actuality only seconds. The silence is loud, but Jungwon slices right through it when he whispers to me, “Is this a kdrama?”

“And… off!” I sit up, hugging my bear closer to me. I’m overwhelmed by Jungwon’s confession. He wants us to really stay together. As in, I’d be his “one”.

“Is—is that what you want too? It’s okay if not, I’ll understand if you wouldn’t be ready, even in the months it would take to get there, unless sooner is better, and I—” He rambles, more emotional than I am, before I put a finger to his lips.

“Yeah, it’s what I want too. I think we should go with your plan, um, wait a little longer since we’re so young and I don’t want to scare my parents.” That earns a laugh out of us both. “But the answer to “would I want it?” is definitely yes!”

Jungwon hugs me tightly, squealing in my ear. I squeal right back, suddenly lighter than ever.

“Dude, I want to say something. Yep, here I go. I— I love you!” Jungwon yells out to me, loud enough to wake up everyone half-way across the world. My heart expands when he says it. I want to scream it back and kiss him under the blue sky, but he continues speaking.

“Okay, look, even though I would have totally respected you for saying you wouldn’t want what I want, I’m feeling so relieved right now. Like whooh! I could jump off a plane! Ride the biggest wave! Sir Loves-a-lot here would come with me, wouldn’t you?” He high fives his bear.

I’m confused when his eyebrow raises. “Did you put a sound in him? Why didn’t you tell me?” Truthfully, I’d forgotten too. However, I smirk as I remember what I recorded.

“Press it.” I urge him to push on the bear’s paw, and he does, putting it near his ear so he can hear it better. The clear sound of my voice comes through, bringing waves of pink, soft love to both Jungwon and I.

“I really, really love you.”

[burnedbyshoto]

a brush of luck

— In a world where soulmates exist you can communicate yours with a brush of a pen. It just doesn’t help that you are a certified idiot with a skill in misplacing things. —

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

pairing: todoroki shouto x reader

warnings: fluff, angst, soulmate!au, cursing

word count: 4,229

a/n: this is for the bnaharem collab and I was super horrible and was not ready and i just woke up and threw this together please dont hate me uhuhuhuhhh see the masterlist here!!!

message to join my tag list!

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

“Hey, y/l/n, you forget this!”

Your hair was falling into your face, your face flustered, and your binders filled with paper seemed to be liquid as they slowly fell to the ground.

Kaminari stood behind you when you turned around. His lips were picked into a kind smile. It was a teasing one too by the small glint in his eyes while he held onto your backpack and phone. A look of self-realized stupidity washed over your face when your head threw back into a groan. How stupid were you, really?

“I’m so sorry!” you exclaimed, throwing your things onto the nearest desk. You felt the tips of your ears burn with embarrassment when Kaminari helped you slip on your backpack and pocketed your phone in the jacket pocket. “I swear I’m the most forgetful person in the world.”

“Well, you do really clinch the title of the person who would forget their head if it wasn’t on their shoulders.”

Snorting, you shoved him with your shoulder, and he helped you regather your things with a low groan.

“Let’s see the tattoo,” you grin, ready to head out once again. Groaning loudly, Kaminari didn’t seem to want to give in to your demand, but still, with a twitch of his eye and a shove of his sleeve, he showed off his arm. “You know what, I’m going to say it—”

“I’m going to say it, I don’t care that you broke your elbows,” Kaminari finishes the phrase with you with a snort.

“Do you think it’s the first thing out of their mouth or matching tattoo?” you asked curiously when you blond best friend also prepped to leave the classroom for the day. 

“I hope its the first thing out of their mouth, imagine how fucking ultra sexy foxy hot that would be,” Kaminari moaned, his eyes rolling to the back of his eyes at the thought. Gagging at the visual horniness of that thought, you walked away, grinning at the way that Kaminari stumbled over his feet to catch up with you.

This was the world you lived in, the world of soulmates.

You weren’t sure when they had first started, but you know that it wasn’t always a phenomenon that was around. When you roamed the internet looking at old, old stories on soulmates, these theories, these worlds were built on one single concept.

They wrote about a world of black and white for everyone until that fateful moment, or matching tattoos for everyone. But no, this world was much more complicated, much more detailed. Yes, in the world there were a lot of theories that ended up being true, but the thing they didn’t see coming was that every couple — every polyamorous relationship consisted of a unique theme.

Kaminari’s soulmate was linked with tattoo’s, and the purpose behind said symbol was unknown, unheard of until he met them. Yours, as you could guess and know, was also different. Pressing your fingers against the pen that sat on the inside pocket of your uniform jacket, you smiled when Kaminari’s arm was thrown around you.

“At least you’ve never lost or forgotten that pen of yours, that would be dangerous!”

“I promise I will never ever forget it.”

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

You sat on your bed nearing midnight. You were cocooned into your blankets flipping through your Hero Lawbook that you were supposed to have read months ago, but now finally was. Humming to yourself, you read through the apparent laws and the not so evident laws.

For instance, there is a law that Pro Heroes are not allowed to eat off the edge of buildings anymore! American transfer students had littered so much it became a law!

Snorting to yourself, you flipped the page.

But something warm pressed into your forearm, the most heated energy that sent shivers down your spine. It was comforting as it was ethereal. The second your body recognized the feeling, the Hero Lawbook went soaring across the room, and you grabbed your pen that was waiting at your side for ages now. 

Hi, sorry I’m just able to get back to you. I had a bunch of homework and friends who just let me leave them.

Smiling to yourself, you twirled the pen in your fingers and scribbled down your response:

It’s all good, I’ve been studying this entire time too, was just bored and didn’t respond to you earlier today!

Your soulmate theme was straightforward and quite comprehensive — it was dubbed the Forearm and Pen theme (you hated that theme). You could communicate with your soulmate by writing with the pen on your arm, but it only worked with that pen, nothing else.

The year you were to turn sixteen, you received a pen from literally out of the blue. You remember celebrating New Year with your class in your first year at U.A.; it had been an enjoyable night! Everything in life was still going fantastic, and your class was finally past the excellent friend’s point and felt like a genuine family. You remember hugging and telling everyone good night, still being fifteen at that point, and stumbling back to your room exhausted.

When you had gotten back to your room, you didn’t even undress; simply tugging off your pants and removing your bra, you threw yourself onto the bed. But you had landed on something stiff and painful, groaning your hands shuffled for whatever it was that you fell on, and when you grabbed it, you froze at the sight of the white box. 

Was this a gift?

Your entire life, you had always wondered if you did have a soulmate, most people you knew after all had soulmate markers that appeared since birth. But you were perfectly normal. You saw all colors; you had no shared pain; there was no tattoo, no mind link, no dream meetings.

Nothing.

You were normal.

Sighing, you opened the box, hoping that it was from someone you at the very least respected.

Inside was a silver pen.

You blinked your eyes rapidly, unsure of what you were looking at, there were no initials, no engraving, nothing. 

It was an exquisite pen, and despite what you thought, it was very, very light. Frowning, your fingers pushed down on the pen, but there was nothing that came out, was there no ink?

Shrugging, you dragged it against your arm feeling the way that the cool tip delicately massaged your arm. It felt nice.

“Holy shit!”

Your eyes saw the pretty grey silvery ink on your forearm. It stood out against your skin, the ink appearing nowhere else but your arm, and then it hit you.

This was for your soulmate!

With excitement tearing through you, your exhaustion no longer bitting on your skull, but the overwhelming need to know that this was for your soulmate shook you awake. Twirling the pen in your fingers, you couldn’t help but start writing.

OMG HI

You sat there staring at your forearm, unsure as to what to do next. What do you do next?

Hey?

If your heart could be anywhere but your chest, you were nearly positive it existed within your throat at this very moment. This was nervewracking, holy shit.

Sorry, you don’t know me, but I’m ___ ___.

You frowned when you tried to write your name, it was stopping you.

It seems that we do have some rules to this entire thing.

They responded back to you, and as if they could hear you, you groaned loudly.

This soulmate shit was already stopping your excitement, it seemed.

From that very first night, the two of you were able to discover a few things. First off, anything too personal was not allowed to be written out. So names, location, and gender were the biggest ones. Birthdays were not, and you were quick to find out that both of you were still fifteen. Second of all, just because you couldn’t figure out where exactly you both were located, you did manage to put together that you were both in Japan. Third of all, your soulmate was a Hero in Training just like you and was a male. Last, of all, you were quick to realize that you were in love with the way your body felt like it was gently warming up whenever he messaged you.

I think I deserve a round of applause.

You grinned after writing your sentence, your eyes watching while the warmth filled your body and his writing slowly appearing on your forearm.

Did you not forget anything today? I find that hard to believe.

You had to suppress a scream.

WELL, IT HAPPENED! I GOT EVERYTHING I NEEDED TO BRING BACK TO MY ROOM WITH ME!!

Weren’t you the one who forgot to bring your entire backpack to school the other day?

NO! I said I almost did, but my bestie got it for me!

How do you forget everything? I think you should try to make a list to make sure that you always have things you need for the day.

... I do… but I always lose the list, and im always running late…

You’re the worst…

Congrats bbg, I’m your soulmate

The world really doesn’t want to bless me with a good life, it seems…

HEY, THAT’S MEAN!

The two of you banter for what seems like hours, the night sky fading from blackness to the deep blue of the sky right before the sunrise. You had spent the entire night curled into your pillow, your face shoved into the soft fabric to suppress your chortling snorts because you geniunely enjoyed interacting with your soulmate. But it was late, and you both had classes early that next morning.

Okay, asshole, I need to sleep! I got this stupid test tomorrow that I did not study for. I'll write to ya tomorrow!! Goodnight!!!

Don’t be rude to your soulmate :( but goodnight, and good luck on that test, sorry for keeping you up.

Smiling at his words, you put the pen to your forearm one last time.

I will never ever accept your apology for making me stay up, I love talking with you, goodnight soulmate, sweet dreams.

You placed the pen down, your eyes fluttering close, heavy with sleep. But still, no exhaustion could suppress the fluttering warmth in your body when words appeared on your arm. 

Sweet dreams, soulmate.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

“Fuck, sorry,” you groaned when you sleepily slammed into the person standing in front of you. 

Blinking tiredness away from your eyes — poorly at that too — you focused up at Shouto. Grinning, you waved at your classmate, who looked almost as exhausted as you felt and definitely looked.

“It’s okay,” he nodded at you stepping to the side so that the two of you could walk side to side.

“You ready for that test today?” you asked after moments of silence.

You and Todoroki Shouto were not as close as you would like to be. Since day one, you had always had a thing for the duality of a man, and while it was mostly superficial feelings derived from the fact that he was attractive above anything else, it still made you awkward around him. At the time, your feelings were still holding you down, you always fully believed that you had no soulmate, so you thought maybe you could sweep him off his feet. It was rumored that his scar covered up his own soulmate mark, so there was no way for him to know who his soulmate was.

Selfishly and embarrassingly, you hoped that you could have him.

Then you met your soulmate, and things changed.

But now you and your classmates were all eighteen and held the world in your hands, yet you couldn’t speak to him usually still.

“There’s no test today?” Shouto stilled, his eyes narrowing in confusion, and your eyes screwed too.

“Isn’t it… Friday? We have a Hero Law test?”

“Y/l/n,” Shouto snorted a grin spreading across his features, “It’s Wednesday.”

If there was a god, he would shoot you right now.

Your cheeks burned with embarrassment while you walked faster to the classroom, Shouto keeping up with your pace easily, he was taller than you after all.

“Shut up,” you warned, your gaze not reaching Shouto’s who was staring at you.

“I wasn’t speaking.”

“I could hear you thinking!”

Shouto put on a smirk, his eyes teasing you, and his mouth dropping to speak, but there was a loud interruption.

“Y/L/N-CHAAAANNNNNN!!!!”

Both of you turned to see Kaminari chasing after you, his arms waving, looking out of breath.

“YOU FORGOT YOUR JACKET AND TIE!”

Shouto chuckled beside you, and you stared down to see that you were, in fact, only wearing half of your uniform. If there’s a god, he will end you now, you thought.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

You're not serious right now, are you?

Going on three years of knowing your soulmate, or at the very least talking with him, you thought you had a good understanding of who he was. He was strong, powerful, and kind. He came off a bit standoffish at times but was the dumbest person you’ve ever known. Common sense was not his friend, and that was okay. 

Even at times when the two of you had your differing opinions because it did happen, it never snowballed more into a small annoyance that the two of you would apologize for and move on. But this was something that shouldn’t have had become a fight, it shouldn’t have been anything more potent than a difference of opinion, but when you suggested entertaining the thought of when the two of you would finally meet, he was uncharacteristically cold. 

Hurt by his tone, you told him, and he said you to grow up until it became this written fight.

Why couldn’t you talk about meeting?

Why didn’t he want to think about what would happen when the two of you would meet?

It was getting ugly for no reason, a fight just to fight, and it was making you nauseous.

But he crossed a line that couldn’t be fixed when he wrote a simple sentence:

Just because you’re my soulmate doesn’t mean I have to love you, meet you, or marry you.

So there you sat, your bottom lip trembling with tears streaking down your blotchy face. He wasn’t being serious, was he? There was no way… no fucking way this was him. The warmth that flooded your body with his new message felt ice-cold, poisoning you from the inside out while you read it.

You're my soulmate, but I have no obligation to do anything with you now or ever. The world chose you for me, not me. I didn’t choose you. I don’t owe you anything here. Soulmates are bullshit and don’t fucking bother messaging me again if you expect me to fall in love with you just because our “souls are connected”

It was needless to say that you didn’t respond back, not because you felt like he should love you because of your connected souls, but because your sobbing and broken emotions left you curled into a ball, ready for a sleepless slumber to take you.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

“You don’t look too hot,” Kaminari told you, hitting you with his foot when your bleary and puffy eyes stared at your best friend.

Kirishima and Mina, who were sitting beside him, elbowed him at the same time, berating him for his insensitive comment. You could feel Sero and Bakugou staring at you, their eyes concerned and curious. 

“What’s eating ya up?” Sero asked, and you found a rock-forming in your throat when you shrugged.

“Soulmate problems…”

“That was fucking obvious,” Bakugou rolled his eyes, taking a drink of his water. “Tell us the problem, not a stupid summary.”

Surprisingly that’s all it took for you to come undone, and you explained what happened with tears falling down your face and a sniffling nose. There was a lot to tell them about it, and you showed them the pen while explaining the entire story. They listened to every word you uttered, faces concern but taking in everything you said.

“You’re an idiot,” Bakugou spoke the second you were finished, his eye twitching while he glared at you. You swallowed thickly, placing the pen on the table while Bakugou edged closer towards you. “He’s not wrong, you know, stupid fucking soulmates are just this irrational solution to an irrational problem. Love is much more complex than that, and you don’t seem to have been fighting for him in that way either, sure you seem like good friends, but that doesn’t give you the right to expect him to love you. But he was a complete fucking dick about it, so I say kill him.”

Your — and all of the rest of your friend group — eyes widened at his words. With nothing to follow him up, you all continued to stare at him while he munched on his food.

“WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING EXTRAS LOOKING AT!”

“Is Bakugou a love expert?” Mina’s stage whispered to the group.

“He almost was, but then he said to kill y/n’s soulmate, so probably not anymore,” Kirishima responded back.

“SHUT THE HELL UP BEFORE I KILL YOU!”

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

It took four days before the warm feeling shot through your body again.

Fuck, I'm really sorry, I was a complete fucking dick. I said a lot of things, and i didn’t mean to say I was angry and upset, and I know that you're upset, rightfully upset, but i don’t want to lose you.

No matter how long it took for him to get back to you, your heart squeezed with euphoria and poison, your hands moving to grab your pen in your pocket.

It wasn’t there.

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.

You tore apart your room, trying to find the silver pen but you couldn’t find it.

Stay as mad as you want, I just… please talk with me soon, even if it takes five days. I'm sorry, soulmate.

Frustrated tears poured down your face, nausea almost making you wheeze when you stared at the words you wanted to reply to.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

One day after he apologized:

Don’t want to bother you, just wanted to apologize again and say that I miss you, talk to you soon.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

Five days after he apologized:

I’m not really sure if this is normal or not… I'm not really… educated when it comes to romance and shit like that, especially when it comes to someone being upset with the other… my female classmates told me that I should expect a response from you soon. I'm really sorry, please write soon.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

So it seems that i’ve fucked up to the point of no return. I'm sorry, I miss you, I love you. Maybe one day I can reconvince you that I'm your soulmate for a good reason, but I guess I’ll have to work on that.

It had been fourteen days since he had apologized, and you sat in your room with tears streaming down your face. You wanted to respond back, but even fourteen days of tirelessly searching U.A.’s entire campus, ripping it stone by stone, there was no finding your pen. Every day without fail, he gave you an update of his day and another apology. Every day they got more hopeless, more pained.

This was his last message for a while, he needed time to work things out with himself now, the strain of this and graduation coming soon being too much to handle at the moment. 

Wiping your tears for what felt like the hundredth time within this past twenty minutes, you stood up on your wobbly legs to go downstairs for water. You were dehydrated and absolutely needed to get out for both fresh air and water.

Walking down the stairwell with swollen eyes, you groaned when you slammed into a body when you opened the door to the common area. 

Shouto blinked down at you, and you felt your throat clampdown at the pained look in his own eyes.

“Have you been—”

“Are you—”

You both spoke over each other, and despite the horrid feeling coursing through your bones, you cracked a smile.

“I’m getting water,” you explained with a shrug. “Long night ya know, just needed to replenish my system so I can cry some more.”

Shouto stared at you, and with horror, you realized precisely what you had said.

“Oh my god, ignore me!” you squeak, covering your face trying to move past him, but Shouto seemed to be curious now and followed after you.

“What’s making you cry?” he asked while you rush to the fridge to get your glass of water.

“What’s got you upset?” you counter downing the cup of water.

Shouto sighed, leaning against the counter of the island in the kitchen. “Would it be weird to say its soulmate issues?”

Swallowing the water in your mouth, you shook your head, a tired smile on your face, “Embarrassingly enough, my issue is also with soulmate stuff.”

A joyless chuckle escaped his mouth, and Shouto’s head tilted backward. You studied his jaw and the way his body seemed tense, too tense.

“What happened?” you press gently standing next to him, shouldering him gently.

“I fucked up, and now my soulmate won’t talk with me,” he says slowly, his head nodding while he glances at you. “I guess telling your soulmate you don’t want them is a bad thing.”

You snorted, nodding your head in agreement, “It’s not just a bad thing, its a super fucked up thing.”

Shouto sighed in agreement, and there was silence when you took another drink of your water.

“I didn’t know you were in contact with your soulmate, though,” you smile wistfully, your hand twirling the cup on the counter. “How’d you meet them?”

“I actually don’t know who they are,” Shouto admitted with pursed lips, and your eyebrows scrunched in confusion. “I have that soulmate thing where you write on your arm, and they can read it.”

Showing off his arm, you glanced at the pale skin. You nodded your head when he pulled out a silver pen that looked similar to yours.

“Well,” you shrug your shoulders, motioning him to write. “I’m no expert, but let’s see if I can help you get your soulmate to forgive you.”

“T-They haven’t responded to me in two weeks…” Shouto’s voice cracks, and the number burns a hole through your stomach. “I’ve written every day, but no answer. I don’t really know what to do, and all the girls in the class don’t really know what to do. Bakugou also said to go fuck myself over it, so I don’t think I really have had any help.”

Ignoring the twisting in your stomach, you willed your weirdness away to shuffle in your seat, “Well, you haven’t asked me, asshole, come on, let’s see what I can do.”

Shouto chuckles, his head nodding, “That is true, but to be fair, you’ve been anywhere, but in the dorm these past few weeks.”

“I lost something,” you mutter embarrassed, but you shake away your problems and point at his wrist. “Write an apology.”

You watched when he wrote, the words expressing his apology and love seeping through the silvery ink on his wrist. You told him to add things to delete things, but in the end, it ended up feeling like a genuine and sincere apology. You watched his pen leave his skin and a warmth shot through your arm. 

Shivering, you looked at your arm, trying to see what your soulmate had written to you even though he said he was going to stop.

The words he wrote appeared on your skin.

Your eyes widened when you stared at Shouto, who was also staring at your arm. 

Your eyes met in an almost world-altering way. This entire time, for three whole years, the two of you had been by each other and never knew. Midnight conversations wasted through ink instead of face to face. Your heart hammered in your throat, and tears once again poured from your eyes when you both stood at full height, staring at each other.

Todoroki Shouto was your soulmate — he was yours, and you were his.

“I’m so sorry, y/n, I don’t know what happened to me. You didn’t deserve that, and fuck, I’m so sorry—”

“I lost my pen, and I couldn’t respond back, I forgave you, but I had no way of reaching back! But I was always forcing myself onto you—”

You both interrupted the other, and now you stared at each other, drinking in the presence of each other and belittling yourselves for not knowing sooner; looking at it now, it was just so obvious. You can’t help it and pull him into a hug. His strong arms wrap around you, and you can hear his hammering heart on your ear, and it fills you up with the familiar warmth when he writes you. This seemed to be a brush of luck it seems.

“Can I kiss you, soulmate.”

“Please do.”

[deancas-fanfiction]

A Daydream Away - Chapter 4

Word Count: 19k+

Summary: After multiple couples go missing from a resort in northern Minnesota, Dean and Cas are forced to pose as a couple to investigate the mysterious entity. As Dean and Cas navigate their fake relationship, it leaves Dean questioning what's real and forces him to confront his feelings for Cas.

A story in which Cas is human, Dean is sometimes an idiot, and Sam acts as matchmaker.

Tags: fake relationship, case fic, sharing a bed, human!cas, Sam ships Dean and Cas, fluff, eventual smut

also available on ao3

Dean awoke to his phone buzzing on the nightstand next to him. He squinted against the morning sun filtering into the room. He could feel that it was still early but he carefully reached for his phone nonetheless. Much like the day before, Cas was practically entangled with Dean. Today he was pressed against Dean's back, with their legs intertwined. Cas' arm was resting over Dean's waist. It all felt very possessive. That thought sent a thrill through Dean. Cas has always seemed like a possessive bastard but knowing he felt possessive over Dean unlocked a lot of complicated feelings that made Dean nearly blush.

The phone buzzed again, and Dean reached for it, careful not to move so much as to jostle Cas. He managed to reach it with his fingertips and dragged it to the edge until he could grab it. Dean unplugged it and saw he had a few texts from Sam.

'I found a potential lead last night at the staff happy hour. Call me tonight and I can fill you in after I finish some research.'

'Don't forget about your dinner reservation tonight at 7. Go to the main lodge and they'll direct you.'

Just as Dean was starting to type out a response, one last message came through. 'Hope you lovebirds are enjoying your honeymoon. Make sure you use protection' followed by a bunch of heart and kissy face emojis.

Dean rolled his eyes and typed out a bitchy response but ultimately assured Sam he'd call him before their dinner reservation. After sending the message, Dean glanced at the clock and saw it wasn't even eight. If they got up now, they may even make it to breakfast in time for the cinnamon rolls Jake and Amy raved about.

"Cas, wake up," Dean half-whispered, shaking him. Cas remained unmoved and fast asleep. "Cas." He said more urgently this time. "Get up." Still no movement. Dean tried a new tactic and shook him a little harder.

Cas frowned and rolled away from Dean, grumbling to himself but still fast asleep. His hair was sticking in different directions and his shirt was bunched up, revealing a tan expanse of skin on his lower back. Dean poked him a few more times but Cas was unmoving and snoring lightly.

Dean rolled his eyes and decided to just get the damn cinnamon rolls himself. He wasn't going to miss out because Cas is a grumpy bastard in the morning. To soften the blow of attempting to wake him before 9, Dean started a pot of coffee in the cabin's kitchen for Cas to enjoy when he awoke. Then he threw on his jacket, grabbed his keys, and was off towards the lodge.

Sure enough, Jake and Amy were correct -- this was the perfect time to grab breakfast. There were few couples and families milling around, otherwise most of the tables were empty and there was no line at the buffet. Dean grabbed two to-go boxes and filled them with eggs and bacon for himself, pancakes and syrup packets for Cas, and of course a few of the large mouthwatering cinnamon rolls set up by the coffee station. He was attempting to close the lid on the full box when he made eye contact with Amy.

"I see you took our advice to get the cinnamon rolls," She smiled and grabbed one for herself.

"You two made them sound so good, how could we resist?" Dean flashed her a victorious smile as the lid gave in and finally shut. "Besides, Cas has a total sweet tooth, there's no way we would ever leave without him trying them."

"Yeah, Jake is the same way. If it were up to him, he would have pure sugar for breakfast. Before we started dating, he would have mountain dew and twizzlers for breakfast."

Dean wrinkled his nose. "That sounds like a college student's wet dream."

Amy threw her head back and laughed. "Precisely! I'm going to use that. The man is in his thirties, sometimes I think he even forgets that." She shook her head, a wistful smile forming on her face. "He wanted to have a candy buffet at our wedding. It took forever to talk him down from that idea."

"A candy bar sounds awesome," Dean pointed out. He paused and looked at her expression. "Oh God -- you don't mean as dessert, do you?"

"No, he wanted that for the dinner buffet!"

Dean laughed loudly. "That's something Cas would do. If we had a wedding -- I mean, a large wedding -- I'm sure he would have preferred if we just serve peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for dinner. They're his favorite."

"That's actually adorable. And it would make for a cheap reception dinner."

Dean nodded in agreement as he poured coffee in a to-go cup in case the cabin coffee isn't up to Cas' standards. "Careful, if he were to hear that, he would totally hold that against me and be all pissy we didn't actually do that. Then I would have no choice but to tell Jake his candy-dinner-buffet is genius."

"Okay, okay truce! I won't say anything about the sandwiches." She responded, laughing.

Dean returned her smile. "Good thinking. You wouldn't want twizzlers and mountain dew as your wedding dinner."  He grabbed the to-go boxes and coffee carrier, carefully balancing them in his arms. "Well, I better bring this back to Cas before the cinnamon rolls cool down. I know he'd want to experience them in their warm and gooey glory."

"Of course, enjoy! Tell him I say hi and that's it -- nothing else at all relating to sandwiches." She winked.

Dean playfully rolled his eyes and slowly made his way back to the car, without catching sight of Sam. Probably for the better anyway, he'd likely make some kind of dick comment about bringing Cas breakfast in bed. Which -- okay, may be true. But that's only because Cas refused to wake up this morning and he didn't want to miss out on the famous cinnamon rolls. And sure, if he was with Sam, he wouldn't have brought him anything back and would have just said "you snooze, you lose, Sammy. You can eat oatmeal and yogurt like the rest of the late sleepers."  But that was part of being the older brother -- you get free reign to be a dick sometimes.

And! Cas is his fake husband! This is totally something a married couple would do for each other, Dean reasoned. So it's not weird or a romantic gesture. And okay, maybe there was a moment last night after they went sledding down the hill. At least, to him it felt like there was a moment where he wanted to kiss Cas and Cas -- well, it seemed like Cas wanted that, too. Or maybe it was just part of the case. There's really no way to know, except y'know, talking about it. But that sounded about as appealing as eating one of Sam's "nutrient rich" meals, whatever the hell those consisted of. All Dean knew was that it was mostly of veggies and no meat, so he didn't want any part in it.

Regardless, Dean wasn't going to be the one to bring it up. If he was imagining something between them, he'd never be able to recover from the embarrassment. Besides, he didn't want to ruin their friendship. For the first time, Cas has agreed to stay with them, and Dean refuses to do or say anything that would make Cas uncomfortable, thus driving him out of the bunker and away from Dean. Not for the first time in the last few days, he bitterly wished he knew what was going on in Cas' head.

By the time Dean returned to the cabin, Cas was sitting up in bed, blurry eyed with a frown etched on his face.

"Good morning, sunshine!" Dean chirped, setting the food down on the bed.

"Do I smell coffee?" Cas grunted.

"Sure do. I put a pot on and brought you a cup from the lodge. Here you go," He handed over the cardboard cup and settled next to him on the bed. Cas' frown eased as he began gulping down the coffee. "I tried waking you so we could get cinnamon rolls, but you were not having it."

"Sorry," Cas said sheepishly. "I don't even remember."

"You and your damn sleep," Dean muttered, opening the cartons of food. "Good thing you have a really thoughtful husband who ventures out into the frozen tundra that is northern Minnesota to obtain cinnamon rolls."

"Yes, good thing." Cas agreed softly. He tipped his cup back, draining the remaining of his coffee.

"Jesus, Cas. It's been like two minutes."

"It's good coffee. If you want me to also be a 'thoughtful husband,' then you should be thankful for my high caffeine intake first thing in the morning."

"Yeah, I remember that time we ran out of coffee at the bunker. You were on a warpath. Sam hid in the dungeon because you nearly called him an 'abomination' again."

"Yes, Dean. I recall. I already apologized to your brother for that."

Dean took a bite of bacon, amused. "Hey, I thought it was funny. I'm just glad you didn't turn on me, too."

"You're the one that went to the store to supply me with more coffee."

"Jesus, you make it sound like I'm your dealer or something."

"You may as well be," He pointed out, grabbing Dean's cup of coffee and taking a long drink of it.

"Yeah, yeah. Eat your damn breakfast. Those cinnamon rolls better be worth the trouble."

Cas opened his mouth, surely to respond with some sassy comment but at the last moment thought better of it and took a large bite of the cinnamon roll. The sound that emitted from his mouth was absolutely sinful.

"Oh my God, Dean." He moaned. "This is amazing."

"You want a room for just the two of you?"

"What do you mean?" Cas tilted his head as he chewed thoughtfully. "We have a room, we're in it right now."

"I -- never mind, Cas. It was a joke. It's that good, huh?"

"Yes, you must try it." He tore off a piece of his cinnamon roll and held it up to Dean's mouth. "Eat it." He ordered.

And wow, okay. The demanding tone from Cas was really working for Dean. He hesitantly leaned forward and took the piece into his mouth. His tongue momentarily brushed against Cas' finger and he swore that he saw Cas' pupils dilate. Huh.

"Yeah, 's good, Cas."

Cas looked pleased with himself and continued eating it in silence, the only sounds in the room were his small moans as he finished it off. Dean felt dazed and forced himself to finish his own breakfast.

"Dean, you have --"

"What?"

"Just, let me -- you have icing on your mouth." Cas leaned forward so he was in Dean's space and slowly dragged his finger along Dean's bottom lip. Against his lip, the pad of his finger felt calloused and rough. Cas' gaze flickered to Dean's lips before they focused on Dean's eyes.

Wait. Is he going to -- ? Dean's brain immediately stopped working as Cas held his gaze and put his finger in his mouth, sucking the frosting off it. Holy fuck, if that wasn't the hottest thing he'd ever seen. Dean knew his mouth was agape and he probably looked like an idiot but he couldn't find the strength to care. Cas basically licked frosting off of him. His pink, plump lips were wrapped around his long finger and Dean's brain not-so-helpfully supplied a lot of fantasies relating to that.

Cas pulled his finger out of his mouth and went back to drinking Dean's coffee with a little smirk on his face. Asshole.

"I, uh -- I'm going to take a shower." Dean mumbled and hurried out of the room.

Dean hurried from the room and locked himself in the bathroom. He leaned against the heavy oak door and took a deep breath. Was it his imagination or was Cas flirting with him? Why else would he suck the icing off his finger like that? Sure, Cas used to have that whole 'innocent angel' going for him but now he's human and he actually acts like it. Probably Dean's bad influence, but whatever. The point is Cas had to know what he was doing, right? No one in their right mind would clean icing from their friend's face and then lick it off if they didn't want to be more than friends.

The worst part is that it was really fucking hot. Dean was already struggling to suppress his feelings for Cas and that nearly pornographic display was really not helping. But maybe he didn't need to actively suppress those feelings, not if Cas felt the same way. But did he? Dean still couldn't be sure. If Cas truly was messing around or didn't understand the connotation of his actions, then Dean would be fucking mortified. Regardless, he couldn't keep sitting around waiting for something to happen between them. So he'll push their boundaries a little and see how Cas reacts. Hopefully then he'll get a better idea of where they stand.

Dean rolled his eyes at himself for how complicated he's making this. If only he felt comfortable straight up asking Cas, but that's never been his style. At last, he peeled himself from the door and turned on the shower. He undressed and briefly considered taking an ice-cold shower to calm himself down, but he changed his mind. Turning the temperature dial to hot, he decided to address his not-so-little problem. After all, he would need to have his mind clear if he was going to read Cas for any indications of his feelings.

He stepped under the shower and nearly groaned as the hot water washed over him. The water pressure was excellent and soothed his sore muscles. His thoughts immediately turned to Cas as he began to stroke himself. The image of Cas’ pink lips sucking on his finger filled his mind as he expertly flicked his wrist around the tip. He imagined those lips around him instead and within no time he was groaning Cas’ name as he spilled into his fist.

---

Dean and Cas spent their afternoon lounging on the couch watching movies. Once Cas became human, Dean compiled a list of movies that Cas needed to watch. Most were movies that came out after Metatron uploaded all of the pop culture references into his mind so that way Cas could truly watch something for the first time. However, Dean snuck a few of his favorites onto the list like the Harry Potter series, Lord of the Rings, and a few spaghetti westerns. When Dean saw there was a Star Wars marathon on tv (another series on the list) Dean declared they would be having a lazy afternoon until it was time for the bourbon tasting.

This brings them to where they are now: sitting with their backs against opposite arms of the couch, legs tangled together under a large shared blanket and the box of chocolates from their honeymoon package sitting half eaten between the two.

Cas grabbed another piece of chocolate out of the heart shaped box, humming happily as he chewed.

"Which character is your favorite?" Cas asked, as he swallowed the candy.

"Han Solo, hands down."

"I should have known."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Oh, come on, Dean. The parallels between you and his character are so obvious. You have the whole 'I'm better off alone' thing going for you, even though deep down you're really caring and would do anything to save your family."

Right. Cas has always been able to read him perfectly. "Whatever, man. Han Solo is cool. And Harrison Ford is a good looking dude." Dean snuck a glance at Cas to see if he'd react to that.

"I suppose," Cas acknowledged, tilting his head as he surveyed Dean. If anything, he seemed curious with a glint in his bright eyes.

"So, uh - let me guess. Your favorite character is Princess Leia?" Dean ventured.

"Actually, yes. She's always out for the victory of many, rather than personal gain. Leia is very brave and independent, too."

"Yeah, I can see why she would be your favorite. It's like you -- always working towards the greater good."

Cas smiled at Dean and his eyes crinkled around the corners. He looked so happy and so human in this moment that Dean was almost tempted to just blurt out his feelings for the man. Almost.

Instead, he threw a piece of chocolate at Cas, which he caught in his mouth, looking very pleased with himself. "You're a dork," Dean said fondly, rolling his eyes.

"I know."

"Did you just Han Solo me?"

Cas looked amused and just turned his attention back to the movie. That asshole totally Han Solo'd him.

- - -

By the time the movie ended, it was nearly time for the bourbon tasting. Dean forced himself up from the couch that had no business being so comfortable, so he could get dressed for the day. He quickly threw on some dark jeans, a t-shirt and a blue button down, which he left open. Deeming it satisfactory for the day, he threw on a coat and waited by the door for Cas to be ready.

While he waited, Dean shot off a text to Sam asking how research was going. Sam immediately responded with 'slow' and an eye rolling emoji. Dean was about to reply and rub it in Sam's face that he gets to go drink bourbon while Sam is stuck reading tomes, but it was at that moment that Cas came out of the bathroom. He was clad in black jeans that were mouthwateringly tight and one of Dean's Zepp shirts. He had become so accustomed to Cas' pristine suit and tie ensemble that sometimes seeing him dressed so casually in Dean's clothes, nonetheless, causes Dean's brain to stop working.

"Am I underdressed?" Cas asked, eyeing Dean warily. "Should I throw on a button down like you?"

"God, no." Dean said, internally wincing at the hoarseness of his voice. "I mean -- it's just a bourbon tasting. You don't have to dress up or anything." Besides, it would be an absolute crime to cover those arms. They were tanned and muscly and Cas should always wear t-shirts to show them off because damn. Dean so badly wanted to run his hands along them, feeling the muscles flex under his touch.

Cas threw on his jacket, interrupting Dean's train of thought. God, it's like he reverted back to a 14-year old's body with the way it constantly responds to Cas.

"Ready?"

"Ready," Cas confirmed, sliding on his Grand View mittens with a soft smile.

The bourbon tasting wasn't very crowded. High-top tables filled the room but only about seventy-five percent were filled. Dean and Cas grabbed a table towards the back of the room so they could keep an eye on everyone. Each table only had 2 chairs which were facing towards the front where the speaker would be. Dean realized this must be another 'couples only' event. The room was dimly lit with dark wood paneled walls, making it feel very warm and intimate. Small table lamps were on each table, along with two flights of bourbon glasses with 5 shot glasses each.

"Cas, are you going to be able to handle this? 5 shots of bourbon is a lot, this shit is strong. I don't want to have to carry you out of here."

Cas sat in the chair to the right and rolled his eyes. "I can handle my liquor just fine, Dean. You've taught me well."

"Hell, I suppose that's true." Dean joined him, sitting in the remaining chair. He scooted his chair closer to Cas and rested his arm on the back of Cas' chair.

"Right," Cas murmured. "We better get in character." He leaned in against Dean's side and rested his hand on Dean's upper thigh. It was enough inches above the knee that it certainly wasn't an innocent placement. His hand was a welcome weight on his thigh and Dean moved his arm so as to rest his hand on Cas' shoulder. He got a small smile in response, letting him know that was okay so Dean rubbed his thumb in circles against it. A soft sigh escaped Cas' mouth which was frankly adorable.

"Did Sam say he found anything else about his lead?" Cas asked, leaning into Dean's ear. Goosebumps prickled along his neck in response.

"Not yet," Dean muttered. "He said he's doing research but hasn't found anything concrete. We'll give him a call after this, we'll have some time to kill before our dinner reservations."

Cas nodded. "I feel like we haven't done much to help move this case along. I do not want Sam to feel like he's doing all of the work."

"I know. But we knew we were unlikely to get any information from guests. All we can really do is try to lure whatever it is and go from there."

"I suppose." Cas chewed on his bottom lip and Dean wanted nothing more than to release his bottom lip and kiss it. Maybe bite it, then smooth it over with a swipe of his tongue. What kind of sounds would Cas make?

"Dean."

"Hmm?" Dean dragged his eyes from Cas' lips to his eyes. His pupils were blown wide, leaving only a small ring of blue.  Another look he wasn't used to reading on Cas.

"Kiss me."

"What?"

"We need to move the case along. Kiss me."

Right. The case. That's why Cas wants to kiss him. No other reason. Dean sighed, a little dejected. He was hoping to avoid this because he knows once he does, it's going to be torture knowing what it's like to kiss Cas without being able to do it again whenever he wants.

"Are you su--?" Dean didn't get to finish his sentence because with a frustrated growl, Cas grabbed the collar of Dean's shirt and pulled him in, pressing their lips together. It started chaste.  A dry press of their lips, soft and warm and innocent. Then Cas sighed into Dean's mouth and made a small sound in the back of his throat. And that made Dean absolutely feral.

His fingers pressed into Cas' hips as he licked into his mouth. He was warm and tasted like honey and chocolate. The smell of his aftershave surrounded him, and it was all just so delicious. Their lips perfectly slotted together, and the kiss was slow and languid, like they all had night and could take their time exploring each other. Dean always imagined their first kiss would be frantic and rough, filled with the unresolved sexual tension from over the course of ten years. He never imagined it could be so sweet, yet so hot. It was everything he'd been waiting for and so much more. Except that it still wasn't enough. He needed more -- he needed to feel Cas against him, he needed to explore every part of him and kiss him so hard that he becomes dazed and all he can do is chant Dean's name like a prayer.

Distantly, a door slammed shut, reminding the two that they were in a very public place, and not in the privacy of their cabin. They jumped apart, flushed and hearts pounding. Dean stared at Cas, his lips were parted, red and swollen, as he breathed heavily.

Dean momentarily closed his eyes, breathing through his nose as he tried to calm his body down. The last thing he needed was for someone to see he was rock hard at a bourbon tasting. He peeked at Cas, who looked just as debauched.

"Jesus, Cas." Dean groaned. One kiss and he was completely hooked. How the hell would he ever be able to look at Cas and his mouth and not think about kissing him?

"Sorry," He nervously licked his lips. "I may have gotten carried away."

"You -- ? No, man. If anything, I got carried away. It's just -- ah, it's been a while since someone kissed me like that. That's all."

Cas nodded, his small smile back. "I'm glad I didn't make you uncomfortable."

Dean laughed humorlessly. In reality, it just solidified his attraction for the guy and he's pretty sure that kiss is going to be the thing that ultimately kills him. "If anything, we just made sure we're target number one."

Something flickered on Cas' face, but it was gone before he could get a good read on it. Before he could analyze too heavily, the speaker greeted everyone and began giving an overview of the brands of bourbon poured out in front of them.

Dean half-listened as he introduced himself and gave his credentials. He told Cas it had been a while since he'd been kissed like that, but truthfully had he ever been kissed like that? He didn't think so.

"The first glass in front of you is Old Forester 1897. From Kentucky, Old Forester is known for making affordable high-quality bourbon," The man explained. "Tasting this first glass, you should note rich vanilla with roasted coffee notes and spiced overnotes. This one is big and bold, with a dark caramel finish. Take the next few minutes to try this one and discuss it with your partner. I recommend trying it in sips, focusing on each of the flavors I mentioned. Enjoy!"

Quiet conversation broke out in the room. Dean sniffed the amber liquid and his mouth nearly watered. Typically, he drinks the cheap stuff because that's what is always around. So, having the opportunity to taste some high-quality bourbon put Dean in an instant good mood. Any awkwardness from the kiss quickly faded and Dean was grateful for the distraction.

"Cheers," Dean said happily. He clanked his shot glass against Cas and drank it all in one go. It burned down his throat into his chest and instantly he felt the warmth spread through him. And now that the guy mentioned it, yeah, he could taste the hint of caramel.

"You were supposed to sip it." Cas frowned. "Not drink it all at once."

"It was just a recommendation, Cas. You can drink it however you want."

Cas didn't look happy with Dean's answer and took another sip of the bourbon. Dean watched as Cas' throat swallowed the bourbon and suddenly he was regretting drinking it all in one go. Watching Cas savor the drink made him wish he had something to distract himself with.

He quickly tore his eyes away from Cas' mouth for the millionth time that day. "What do you think, Cas?"

"I like it. It makes me feel...warm."

Dean laughed. "Yeah, bourbon will do that to you. It's the best drink to have in winter for that exact reason."

The bourbon man clapped his hands together to gather everyone's attention. "I see most of you have finished the 1897, so I'll move forward onto the next one. This next one is perfect for the colder months - "

Dean lifted his eyebrows at Cas as if to say see, I told you so. Cas smiled and turned his attention back to the speaker.

" - it is another Old Forester bourbon, but this one is the 1910. It has notes of cherry, dark chocolate, maple syrup and a hint of spice. For those of you who prefer sweet to spice, this is the bourbon for you." He continued sharing trivia about the Old Forester brand and the barrels used to make these bottles. "Now that I've given you all time to clear your taste pallets, enjoy the 1910!"

Dean focused this time on savoring the glass instead of drinking it in one large gulp. He had to admit, Cas was right. When he took the time to savor the flavors he could actually pick up on the cherry and dark chocolate. Before all he tasted was the burn of it.

"I really like this one." Cas announced. His cheeks were a little pink from the alcohol which Dean thought was endearing as hell. "I like the maple syrup flavor."

"When we get home, I'll have to introduce you to the finer bottles of whiskey I've been saving for a special occasion. You'll love it."

Cas titled his head. "But you said you're saving it for a special occasion?"

"Hell, Cas. We saved the world and we're all together. It can't get more special than that."

"I suppose not."

The rest of the tasting continued the same. The speaker would explain the bourbon they were tasting and include some interesting facts (all bourbon is whiskey but not all whiskey is bourbon) and sometimes some gross ones (like before there were strict FDA regulations, distilleries used to include substances like tobacco spit and dirt in their whiskey barrels for flavor) and by the time they finished their fifth and final glass, Dean and Cas were feeling the effects of the bourbon. Cas more so, his speech was a little slurred but he could hold himself upright just fine. He was in that perfect tipsy zone and Dean wasn't far behind him.

The lodge offered a free shuttle service for everyone back to their cabins so the guests wouldn't have to stumble back to their cabins in the cold. Dean happily took them up on that service because he knew he wasn't in the right state to drive. The shuttle was a small bus with only a few rows of seats. They grabbed a seat in the back while a few of the other couples from the class climbed in.

With a low rumble, the shuttle started and lurched forward. It headed along the road towards Dean and Cas' cabin, making stops along the way for the other guests. Cas leaned into Dean's side and sighed happily, nuzzling his face in the crook of Dean's shoulder.

"Mmm, 's nice." His voice was muffled against Dean's coat. "You're warm."

"You're drunk."

"Just a little," He pressed a kiss to his shoulder and Dean's breath hitched. Was this part of the act or was this Cas with his guard down? He leaned more into Dean and gripped Dean's arm. To any onlooker, there would be no doubt they're a couple. That thought sent a little thrill through Dean, secretly pleased by that idea. Who knew he was so possessive?

The bus stopped at the access road leading up to their cabin, so Dean nudged Cas and ushered him off the bus. They stepped out into the cold and Dean felt it sober him up a little. Cas must have felt the same because he was holding himself up straighter and his eyes seemed a little less cloudy. They trudged up the road leading to their cabin and Dean grabbed a hold of Cas' hand, noting the small smile which formed.

"Should we call Sam?"

"Yes, good idea." Dean pulled out his phone with his free hand and dialed Sam's number. It rang a few times then went to voicemail. "Did he reject my call?"

"That seems very out of character for Sam."

Dean tried again. On the second ring he picked up, sounding out of breath. "Dean?"

"Dude, did you reject my call?"

"Uh, sorry. I was - uh in the middle of something."

Dean and Cas exchanged a confused look. "Why are you out of breath? I know you're not running in this weather."

"No reason. I just -- what's up? Are you guys alright?"

"Dean and I drank bourbon at the tasting and now I feel really warm," Cas announced.

"Are you guys drunk?" Sam sounded amused.

"No!" They both said in unison.

"Just, tell me about the lead you found."

"Oh, right! I don't really know much yet. But last night at happy hour the staff was talking about local legends and there was this one that targets young people in love. I don't remember the name of it, but it sounded like it fit the bill. The locals didn't know much that sounded helpful so I'm having Donna look into it."

"That sounds promising," Cas agreed. "Do you remember any other details?"

"Not any that are helpful. I had to really sift through a lot of stuff that isn't our kind of thing. You know how these legends get so twisted over the years."

"Well, keep us posted if Donna finds anything."

"Yeah, will do. Just hang tight until --"

A loud crash echoed over the phone and a woman's voice carried through, saying something intelligible.

"Sam." Dean warned. "Who's there with you?"

"Um --"

"So help me -- if you are with another woman I'm going to be pissed. Eileen is so beyond your league and the fact that you're even willing to risk that..."

"Shit." Sam sighed over the phone. "Switch to facetime."

Dean did as Sam said and was greeted with Sam's anxious face. "So uh -- Eileen is here." He turned the camera and was greeted by Eileen smiling sheepishly.

Cas signed something to Eileen and she laughed in response. Dean focused the camera back on his face so Eileen could read his lips. "What are you doing in Minnesota?"

"My hunt in Iowa wrapped up early, so I came up here to join Sam."

"I thought your hunt was in Ohio?" Cas questioned.

Eileen had a look that was equal parts sympathy and panic on her face as she handed the phone back to Sam.

"Sam, what the hell? Was Eileen not actually on a hunt?"

"No." He admitted. "She wasn't."

"Then why the hell did you send us on this hunt when you two could have done it?"

Now Sam just looked uncomfortable and Dean suddenly realized what was going on. "You've got to be kidding me." Sam opened his mouth to respond but Dean cut him off. "Nope. Not discussing this with you. Not now, not ever. We have to go, keep us updated on the case."

"Bye!" Eileen yelled from the background before the screen went black.

"I don't understand what just happened." Cas said, looking genuinely confused. "What did Sam do?"

"He set us up! To take this case when he and Eileen could have done it."

"But what did he set us up with?"

"Each other, Cas." Dean said strained.

"Oh." He squeaked and blushed furiously.

Oh.

Oh.

Maybe he wasn't going to kill Sam after all.

[beardofkamenev]

When Adults Attack! (Teenagers)

(Sorry to everyone for dragging this up again, but some people are chronically incapable of letting drama die down.)

The last time I posted about this was 18 February. It’s now late-March. Despite repeatedly claiming to be “over it”, a self-proclaimed “respected history blogger” has been screaming into the void for over a month now. She seems to be under the unfortunate impression that she’s completely innocent of wrongdoing, all the criticism is unprovoked, she has been targeted by “white bigots”, and that she’s somehow the real victim here. So now I have to explain why that’s bullshit. Unlike her and her two friends, I don’t make extreme but vague accusations with zero evidence. I don’t make empty threats about “exposing” people.

The short story? She involved her own self in a situation that had nothing to do with her, downplayed her friends’ racism towards others, incited her followers to harass a teenager, repeatedly lied to her followers about the multiple POC who criticised her friends being “white”, and has continued to inflame the issue while trying to downplay her role in doing so. The long story? Well, I’ll let the receipts do the talking.

That’s Olivia’s first post at the start of February, days before I or anyone else had even said anything. “My anonymous Jewish friend said!” should have been a red flag to anyone capable of reading anything longer than 280 characters. I’ve already explained why Haley (lucreciadeleon/turtlemoons plus her 92849374 alt accounts) is full of shit and so have plenty of others (here, here, and here, to name a few).

Olivia claims that, as a Romani woman, she’s not obliged to engage with content that offends her. Fine. So why is a black teenager obliged to engage with Haley’s deranged anons? Why are her hate anons are so worthy of a response that not responding is an act of ANTISEMITISM that warrants Olivia telling everyone what an antisemite this teenager is for not responding? FYI, NO ONE is obligated to respond to anon hate, especially from people they’ve already blocked. And considering Haley admitted not once, not twice, but three times to breaking Tumblr’s TOS to circumvent a mutual block and send those anons (including how she did it), people are especially not obligated to engage with her.

I made my first posts exposing Taylor (lucreziaborgia/elizabethblount) and Haley’s lies and backtracking on 6 and 7 February. This was before I acknowledged Olivia’s role in inflaming the situation. In fact, I didn’t even know about her tweets until 8 February. Yet, here she is on 6 FEBRUARY already bitching about my posts to her Twitter followers. She has some nerve acting like I victimised her, just because I posted the screenshots of her bitching about me. And bragging about ‘gaslighting’? The word that multiple people have separately described what her two friends subjected them to? Classy.

I can’t “stalk” her public Twitter any more than she can “stalk” my public blog. What an exceptionally stupid claim to make, considering her tweets kept getting recommended to my mutuals whether they liked it or not. Have some integrity and own the shit you say, rather than backtracking, deleting your posts, and pretending that you didn’t say the things we saw you say. If you want to talk shit about others in public, be ready to answer for it in public.

I also wonder how this started over Henry VII. I specifically wonder how this discussion between myself and May (richmond-rex) triggered Taylor’s totally unprovoked racist comments about how we and Nathen Amin “simp for a dead white man”, and we should “simp for someone who actually advocated for the rights of others” instead. The implication being that Tudor history is only for white people like Taylor, and that only her fave is worthy of discussion (“AnNe BoLeYn WaS oThErEd BeCaUsE sHe WaS tAn.” Good grief).

When multiple POC called bootleg Regina George out for it, not only did she say she couldn’t possibly be racist because Haley approved of her racism, but also tried to argue that Nathen Amin deserved it because it was inappropriate for a British man to joke about Brexit. She then claimed we called her “anti-Welsh” (another fucking lie) to make it seem like a bunch of cRaZy blacks and browns were attacking poor, innocent white her (with Olivia coming to the rescue, of course). And as if that wasn’t enough, Haley then sent these bad faith hate anons calling Nathen Amin’s tweet ANTISEMITIC, for no other reason than to retroactively justify Taylor’s racist comments (though I didn’t see Haley getting offended when she was hate-scrolling through his blog before Taylor was called out).

That was the “antisemitic shit” Haley “privately messaged about” that Olivia thinks deserves a response. In case it's not clear: defending racism makes you complicit in racism. Being Jewish is NOT a get-out-of-racism-free card, and Haley trying to use it as one is absolutely dishonest, especially when NO ONE even knew she was Jewish until she finally admitted in February she was the anonymous ‘Jewish friend’ who sent those batshit anons. Other Jewish people also called Haley out on it, yet Haley and Olivia have conveniently ignored that little fact since it contradicts their narrative.

You think it’s over? Nope. Taylor then slunk into May’s dm’s with a half-arsed apology, where she admitted that the only reason she made those racist comments about Nathen Amin was because we “attacked Gareth Russell first” (“BeCaUsE AnNe FaNs CiTe HiS wOrk”) and she “just wanted to educate us about not lionising Henry VII” (even though anyone with eyeballs can read our discussion see she’s full of shit). At the same time, she and Haley were messaging other history bloggers, telling them that everyone who called them out were antisemites (including an openly Jewish mutual of ours) in an attempt to alienate them from the community. And this was just in JANUARY.

“I can’t be racist! My Jewish friend agrees with my racism!” That steaming load of backtracking horseshit is unfortunately the kind of nonsense Olivia has chosen to defend. FOR WEEKS Taylor ignored May’s messages, explaining why she — a black woman — found Taylor’s comments offensive. Did Taylor listen? Nope. In fact, she only replied in February: after she already started posting about how ignoring Haley’s hate anons was “antisemitism”. How convenient. Taylor might be a fucking idiot but we’re not. She only replied to May because she was afraid we’d use her own words against her. Clearly she never learnt a damn thing because here she is on 6 February backtracking on her apology. “Actually, I did NOTHING wrong! Also, you’re all antisemites for saying I did because my Jewish friend agrees with me!” And what made Taylor feel as though she had permission to start deflecting her vile behaviour onto others in order to get the heat off her? Olivia’s post about ‘their Jewish friend’ Haley: the one that followed Olivia’s “private discussion” with “her two friends”. Taylor is a racist hypocrite who hides behind the few minority friends she has to justify her racism, and attacks every other minority who disagrees with her. It’s no coincidence that the majority of the history bloggers who have a problem with Taylor and Haley’s nasty behaviour happen to be POC.

Despite Olivia admitting that she knew nothing about that situation other than what those two told her, she still took it upon herself to misconstrue and downplay to all her followers the extent of her friends’ racism, lies, and general nastiness (here she is on 9 MARCH). For her, our problems with racism are little more than “stupid drama”, “Henry VII drama”, “Gareth Russell drama”, “overreacting to a joke”, and “petty disagreements over dead people” because her friends are the perpetrators. Yet she demands everyone sympathise with her never-ending dramas and projects her behaviour onto others, despite the fact that she’s shown absolutely no understanding for why so many people have problems with her friends and has consistently defended the perpetrators. She’s entitled to be upset at whatever she wants to be upset at, but she is not entitled to tell her followers that we can’t be upset about racism directed at us, especially when that situation NEVER EVEN INVOLVED HER.

I agree. It’s disturbing that three grown women in their mid to late 20s have a vendetta against an 18 year old. Olivia acknowledged that her posts were reckless and that she would have acted differently if she just sat down and thought for one fucking second. But rather than correct the record on the same platform she made those accusations, she doubled down and took off to Twitter, saying that her anger entitled her to act that way. All with zero acknowledgement of the fact that the teenager SHE falsely accused and repeatedly mocked for her age was still being harassed by HER followers as a direct result of HER posts.

She might love the ‘clout’ that comes with a large following, but she evidently doesn’t care about the responsibility that comes with it. In Taylor and Haley’s case, it’s little more than a means to intimidate others into silence. Olivia might be a “respected history blogger” or a “good historian”, but that definitely doesn’t make her a good person. Far from it, if her behaviour is anything to go by.

This was on 9 February, 3 days after my first post. Bitching about me was all fun and games until the receipts came out, huh?

There’s nothing “insane” about keeping receipts, especially when Taylor and Haley are notorious for lying out of their arses and fake-apologising to people in the dm’s, only to continue mocking them on Twitter afterwards. You know what is insane though? Searching ‘romani’ on our blogs in a pathetic attempt to dig up dirt that doesn’t even exist (yeah, stat trackers exist). Do you know what else is insane? Haley spamming people with passive aggressive anons and sending anon hate to people who’ve already blocked her. She also “stalked” our WOTR group chat, though she’ll never admit to it, despite accidentally posting the dated receipts proving it. Oops!

It’s no secret that Taylor and Haley are cowards (as all bullies are), so it was no surprise when they eventually involved Olivia in their month-old vendetta against a teenager. They wanted to school a black girl on racism and Congolese genocide apologism, so they needed to get a “respectable history blogger” on their side. And Olivia happily obliged, kicking up such a fuss on their behalf that the teenager just offered to end it (despite the fact that Olivia vagued her first). Yet still Olivia continued, publicly mocking her age and calling her an “antisemite” long after the discussion was over (here she is on 24 February still carrying on). Either a teenager is old enough to be publicly shamed for being an “antisemite” and “antiromani bigot”, or she’s too young to be taken seriously. But at 25, Olivia is certainly old enough to know better than to participate in this kind of vile, petty, wannabe Mean Girl behaviour.

Olivia is not black. Taylor is not black. Haley is not black. So for the record, if you are not black, it is not your place to tell BLACK PEOPLE whether they can take issue with apologism for BLACK GENOCIDE. Multiple black history bloggers have already explained why they had a problem with Gareth Russell’s comments about the Congolese genocide (including the teen in question), yet that was less important to Olivia than not being able to call him a sexist weirdo because he’s gay. Olivia cannot speak on all minority issues — especially black and brown issues — and it is arrogant of her to assume that she can, especially since her understanding of the Gareth Russell issue came purely from “what she discussed with her two friends” by her own admission.

What a take. Here’s the “anti-Romani” post that I supposedly made. Precisely ZERO of my posts were about Olivia and not once did I even name her directly. So her claims that I mounted some kind of “vicious attack” against her is, uh, bullshit. Criticising her and her friends for their nasty, dishonest, and irresponsible behaviour isn’t “anti-Romani” just because she’s Romani. It’s no more “anti-Romani” than her erratic attempts to “expose” me are anti-Asian just because I’m Asian. It’s not any more “anti-Romani” just because the UK government has passed anti-Romani laws, any more than her telling deranged lies about me for over a month is an anti-Asian hate crime simply because there’s been an increase in anti-Asian hate crimes. I’m not British. I’m not from the UK. I have no control over whatever dumb, racist crap her government does. So she can fuck off and continue fucking off if she wants to make me personally responsible for that. The backlash she received had nothing to do with her identity and everything to do with how she purposely incited harassment against a teenager, defended her friends’ racism, and spread demonstrable lies to her followers. The “viciousness” of the backlash she received is directly proportionate to the viciousness of her own baseless attacks against others. She can claim to be more mature than an 18 year old all she wants, but do you know what the actual mature thing to do would have been? To not promote her friends’ lies and nonsense, especially when the other people they tried to involve had the sense to stay out of it.

Olivia, Taylor and Haley are fully-grown adults, but take no responsibility for their actions. Yet, they expect teenagers to have total control over not only their own emotions, but also the emotions and actions of others. Olivia thinks that a teen should be personally responsible for the behaviour of fully-grown adults, yet she’s close friends with Taylor — a racist, xenophobic bully who screenshots Tumblr people’s posts to mock them on Twitter (here and here from December), called Poles who’ve lost relatives in the Holocaust “genocidal loving freaks”, accused an openly Ashkenazi Jewish blogger of “internalised antisemitism” just for criticising her (a white gentile), said that people who like Mary I “resent their own siblings”, co-opted our struggles under Spanish imperialism just so she could bully ‘Spaniards’ (despite her being American and therefore equally responsible for genocide, by her flawed logic), and said that the black teen who called out her racism “really deserved to be bullied” and “needed to be policed”. Olivia is also close friends with Haley, who has a history of attacking people over posts that have nothing to do with her, publicly admitted to circumventing blocks in order to send hate anons, and likened me — a Filipino immigrant — to DONALD TRUMP and a neo-Nazi conspiracy theorist just because I posted the receipts exposing her lies, harassment of others, and projection.

Most of the people who have spoken out against these three didn’t even know each other until last month. Some of ‘us’ have actually blocked each other. Yet all of us agree that their behaviour towards others has been absolutely unacceptable. How is it that so many unrelated people from different corners of the ‘fandom’ have exactly the same problems with exactly the same people? If Olivia want us to take personal responsibility for “our friends’” behaviour, then she should first take responsibility for hers.

This is on 26 February, over a week after I last posted. As anyone with eyeballs can see, I called her British once. Not “repeatedly”. ONCE. So she can fuck off again with that bullshit. And why did I point that out? Because Olivia, a British citizen, made pejorative comments about “white Eastern Europeans!!!” just because she thinks some Polish people committed the heinous crime of... screenshotting her tweets. They didn’t even do it, and even if they did, how is that even relevant? Everyone knows that one specific Polish person lives rent free in Taylor’s head, so clearly Olivia just took Taylor’s word for it that it must have been The Poles who were “stalking” her. Maybe don’t take paranoid liars at face value next time?

Shameless, ignorant, tone deaf nonsense. Olivia constantly demands that people treat her and her identity with the utmost respect, yet here she was on 9 February already disrespecting the identities of others just so she can score some petty ‘oppression points’ against them. Why even bring their nationalities up? And why call them “white Eastern Europeans” instead of Polish since she knows they’re Polish? Is it because acknowledging that they are Polish would mean acknowledging that she doesn’t actually have a monopoly on a claim to discrimination or Holocaust trauma? Could it be that dismissing them as just some “white Eastern Europeans” was just another way for her to add credence to her own “pathetic lies” about the situation? There’s a word for that behaviour, and it starts with pro- and ends with -jection.

Let me reiterate: it is IGNORANT of her to use their identity against them, especially when hate-crimes against Polish immigrants have increased in her home country, and especially when the specific people she insulted lost close relatives (including Jewish relatives) in the Holocaust. It’s not “repeatedly mocking her identity” to point out her hypocrisy. Her being Romani is not an excuse for casual xenophobia. She might be able to hide her identity in the UK (though she shouldn’t have to), but Polish immigrants do not have the privilege of passing as first-language white British. I cannot pass as non-Asian. The black girl she and her friends tried to bully off Tumblr cannot pass as non-black. Olivia weaponising people’s identity against them just because she thinks they saw her public tweets is ignorant, petty, and completely uncalled for. She should be absolutely ashamed for using that pathetic argument, but based on her most recent farrago of nonsense, she probably won’t be.

Here’s her on 7 MARCH. And of course Taylor was the first to like it lol. Olivia may have deluded herself into believing she was just an innocent bystander, but unfortunately, enough people saw her admitting to inserting herself into the situation at the behest of her two friends. With every post before and since, her accusations have gotten wilder and wilder, falser and falser, and more and more irrelevant because she knows full well that none of her followers will bother fact-checking her. That’s the beauty of vagueing people. It’s how Taylor and Haley have been able to get away with pulling the wool over peoples’ eyes for so long. Too bad repetition, projection, and self-righteous outrage doesn’t equate to the truth because those are all those three have.

“SOMEONE NEEDS TO EXPOSE THE WHOLE DAMN LOT OF THEM! BUT IT WON’T BE ME!” 

No one has said anything since 18 February, yet here’s Olivia publicly inciting her followers again. She’s “done talking about it”, yet she’s the only one continuing the drama. She is being ‘persecuted’, yet she mobilises her followers to go after others. She needs to be defended against critics, yet she also can’t resist bragging about big her Tumblr following is, how “piddly” our notes are compared to hers, how she got over 30 followers to report my posts (they’re still up lol), and how many people she can get to dig through our blogs to find anything to “expose” us. Olivia, I’m sorry that you require constant validation from strangers on the internet, but not everyone has the same priorities as you. Some of us just come here to have fun, but having shitstarters in the community is decidedly un-fun.

All my posts were directed at Taylor and Haley, but since Olivia insists on making this revolve around her, let me clarify: she is a hypocrite and a professional victim. Words have meaning, and those words are the most accurate words to describe her behaviour. It has fuck all to do with her identity. She and Haley are professional victims because they act as if their minority statuses exempt them from basic rules of online courtesy and entitle them to run their mouths about others with no consequence. And Olivia is a hypocrite because she demands the respect and understanding that she has repeatedly refused to show to others. She made ignorant, xenophobic comments against Polish people because she falsely assumed they screenshot her public posts bitching about others. She pretends that the many POC who have spoken out against her are just some “white” hive-mind because admitting that we’re not white will discredit the victimhood narrative she’s been peddling to her followers. And she arrogantly presumes to be ‘our’ voice in the community, all while mobilising her following to intimidate and silence the minorities who take issue with her and her friends’ vile behaviour.

It’s extremely telling that in every one of her unlettered rants, Olivia made the conscious choice to conflate us with “white gentiles”, “white antisemites”, and “white Eastern Europeans”. Why? Because in order to “name and shame” us, she’d have to admit to her followers that the majority of the people criticising her aren’t actually “white”, but are in fact black, brown, and Jewish. Having repeatedly demanded that her followers defend her, her reputation and credibility now depends upon people continuing to see her as the oppressed victim of “bigoted whites”. Unfortunately for her and her friends, the truth will always come out. That’s what receipts are for, no matter what they claim.

The history community didn’t side with “a white gentile woman”. We sided with a black teenager who Olivia and her friends repeatedly mocked for her age, publicly and privately spread false accusations against, and incited their followers to harass with their never-ending posts. We sided against white racists like Taylor, and her white-passing enablers like Olivia and Haley. Since being called out for racism by a black girl discredited them, they had to discredit her. And unlike the others Taylor and Haley tried to involve, Olivia was their willing accomplice. If she has now been “alienated by half the history fandom”, it is because of her own behaviour and rightly so.

The ideal course of action would be for Olivia to finally take some responsibility for her actions, publicly apologise for her role in inflaming this drama, and move on like the rest of us have tried to do. But unfortunately, she may be too far gone in her own pathological need for online validation to ever admit wrongdoing without some serious introspection. So perhaps, Olivia, if anything else, you should just take your own advice and, once and for all, SHUT THE FUCK UP.

[currywaifu]

𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: rival 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩: sumeragi tenma/reader 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: sfw 𝐰𝐜: 2.9k words, 3 images

𝐚𝐧: two people from the filo discord (ty to sel & kai) gave me the idea for this! i meant to push this out a while back, but only got the time to finish it tonight! at... 5 am... sorry for the long delay, @chewie-santatoast​ ! 

If someone were to ask Tenma why he was stalking your Instablam right now, he’d be able to spout off various excuses— all with varying levels of believability.

His first excuse was that you were going to be one of his latest co-stars in a drama. Just because the both of you were going to be part of only a few episodes doesn’t mean he’s gonna stop being diligent. He’s just doing his best to be up to date with you and the other cast, for social reasons.

Why is he so focused on your page, then?

His second excuse would be that he’s only looking, following your account because you’re one of his rivals! Not only were you someone who also started acting at a young age, but you also recently started getting into theatre! Not only were you a threat to any possible awards he could get this season, but any notable troupe was a rival to Mankai for any possible competitions or awards! He’s only looking after the company by scoping out the competition!

Why is he so focused on a specific set of images?

His third excuse, actually still pretty believable, was that he was looking at your most recent posts wherein you were clearly promoting a new play, your repost of the poster signifying that you were the lead. Rival or not, he was still interested in plays or musicals— of course he was going to learn more about the production you were going to be a part of, right?

Why is he looking so intently at the caption and comments, then?

Even in his own brain, this is where Tenma began fumbling. You were just supposed to be promoting, so why were you posting a selfie with another actor, even mentioning that same person in the caption? And- and the people in the comments! Why were they talking about “shipping” you and that guy? Comments about how cute of a couple you’d make… were they fake fans of theatre or something? People who were more engrossed with the actor’s lives than the show?

That’s exactly it… he’s repulsed by people’s audacity. Fan service was alright, but you shouldn’t be feeding your followers anything unnecessary— and why were they so adamant in taking things too far and out of context anyway?

The door creaked open, and he quickly locked his phone as he hastily stashed it underneath his pillow, face unknowingly painted with a blush as though he was hiding something scandalous instead of a picture of you doing finger hearts at the camera.

… thank God it was just Misumi, who doesn’t mention anything possibly wrong with his appearance or attitude. The older boy mentioned something about eating triangle cakes together with the rest of the troupe, and he eagerly replied in agreement as he gets up from bed.

In his head, Tenma justified his actions by telling himself it’d just be a hassle if anyone (note: Yuki or Kazunari) caught him and automatically made assumptions.

When Tenma arrived on set, you were exiting out of your car as well.

‘I should probably be friendly and greet them, right?’ he thought to himself as his body was positioning itself to avoid you instead. Unfortunately (or fortunately) for him, you had already spotted him and with a loud “Tenma-kun!”, his gaze was forced to meet with yours.

You made your way beside him with a blinding smile, not giving him the time to formulate a greeting in return as you began talking up a storm.

“I’m excited to work with you again!” you said, briefly pausing to greet his manager as well before turning back to him. “The last time we’ve worked together was for a drama 6 months ago, right?”

“No,” he corrected immediately, the ‘you idiot’ that would have followed thankfully left out by Tenma. “We filmed a commercial 3 months ago, and then we had a magazine spread last month.”

When you blink up at him in surprise, he found himself getting a little conscious. “It’s… it’s not like I memorised it because of you, though!” he said, beginning to explain himself, “obviously a good actor remembers the things they’re a part of, right?”

When you giggled in response, a part of him started to feel… no, not worried, but something.

“No, no, I totally get that!” you raised your arms up in surrender, “I just meant like an actual acting gig, I guess? Nothing beats having a whole new script to learn, and getting to act with the people you admire. Right, Tenma-kun?”

Inclined to agree with you, he nodded in agreement. “Right…”

You looked at him with a blank stare on your face, like he was missing something (what was there for him to miss, though?) before quickly turning away to greet some of the production crew passing by with a wave and grin.

He, for once, managed to tune out the coos and comments of, “it’s so cute that they stayed friends after all these years!” and “aww look they even entered the set together!” in favour of wondering if there was something he said (or didn’t) that ended the conversation.

…

After filming finished for the day, he decided to lag behind instead of immediately leaving. He’s worked with a bunch of the cast beforehand, so it was a good thing to catch up with them.

“Mini Sumeragi,” one of his more… out there seniors, a friend of his father, began “are you gonna keep staring at their dressing room?”

Freezing up, he mentally took note to stop darting his eyes in that direction before anyone could make something out of it; it was too late, though, when the lead actress asked who occupied that room and several people replied your name in chorus.

“Ohoho~ our young boy is finally growing up,” the lead actor said with a grin, and the whole cast amusedly watched Tenma’s cool mask forming cracks.

“Could it be you’re waiting for them to go out? Is that why you’re staying behind to chat with us oldies?” none of them look the least bit offended, but while he was safe on that aspect, the little smirks and chuckles that escaped the others made him want to justify his actions somehow.

“It’s- it’s because I— have something to tell them!” Tenma explained, despite not knowing a) what he would even say to you, and b) that he was planning on talking to you in the first place. Even though all the signs were pointing to him wanting to do so, at least to an outsider’s perspective.

With widened eyes and an over-dramatised look of shock, the show’s director herself let out a gasp. “Sumeragi-kun, you don’t mean… you’re going to…“

Tenma’s perceptive after all, especially when it came to body language. He had to be as the Summer Troupe’s leader! He could tell there was something bothering you a while ago. As co-workers, he just doesn’t want you to have an issue with him is all! Not— not that he was super concerned about what you thought about him though, it was just—

“Tenma-kun?”

The whole group turned to look at the source of the voice, and who else could it be other than the devil itself.

“I’m glad you’re still here!” you exclaimed, a smile gracing your face as you approached the ginger. “I actually had something I needed to ask you about.”

“Huh? Oh, of course you did,” he crossed his arms, averting his eyes from your expectant gaze. “What did you want?” What— what else was he supposed to say?

Unexpectedly, you bring out your phone and hand it to him. Hold on, wasn’t this like those scenes in the dramas he acted in? Or Muku’s shoujo mangas? Where the main character would hand her phone to the guy she liked and asked for his number?

“Could we start chatting on LIME?” Tenma stiffened at your words, until you followed up with “Since you got into theatre before me, you’d probably have some tips or advice, right? I’m still inexperienced, so…”

After what felt like minutes, his thumbs quickly moved to enter his phone number, adding himself as a friend on your phone.

“I’m only doing this because it’s theatre related, okay? There’s no other reason!”

“Yes, yes, I know… Tenma-kun is always very nice to me,” with a closed-eyed smile making its way to your face, the both of you remained unaware of two things. First, the reddening of Tenma’s ears, and second, the hushed commentary of the others in the room.

“… that felt like a scene from a high school drama,” the director commented as soon as the both of you were out of earshot, looking contemplative, “they’re cute. Maybe I’ll cast them as the leads in my next show.”

Several laughs come out of the group, knowing glances thrown around from one person to another. The usually professional Sumeragi Tenma finally acting his own age, and the one who caused him to act that way. Whether you two knew it or not, you two’d become the hot topic amongst the crew for the next few filming sessions.

Unsurprisingly, Yuki’s the first one to notice something was up; while Tenma was good enough to be able to hide whoever it was he was chatting with on his phone, he was not slick enough to hide how affected he got upon hearing his phone ping, or the look on his face as he read and his fingers poised themselves to reply.

What kind of person gets smiley so early in the morning without eating breakfast, just because of a text message? Disgusting, really.

Also unsurprisingly, Kazunari’s second to notice, but unlike Yuki he’s the first to properly try and figure out who Tenma’s talking to instead of just making comments here and there.

After all, the blond can only conclude two things— first, they must be a special enough person to have the always busy actor chat with them consistently during his free time; second, Tenten… probably hasn’t noticed that he’s being so, so obvious to the point that Misumi thought their very own leader found a “very special triangle”.

Kazunari found it was a little difficult, trying to figure out who it was exactly that caught Tenma’s attention, especially with the latter keeping a tighter on his phone than usual.

However, it was not impossible.

It wasn’t uncommon for several members of the troupe to gather around the living room to watch the latest episode of whatever drama Tenma was currently in. It wasn’t that uncommon either for him to watch with everyone as well, judging his own acting and seeing how it turned out through the camera.

Tonight was different though, and it would seem that always having his phone on his possession had become his own boon… or perhaps the true boon was sitting in front of Kazunari, giving him the perfect view to have a bit of a peek without being evident about his intent.

…

Tenten—

Tenten, why—

Kazunari found himself sending a mental prayer to whatever deity existed in the universe, not just for his own sanity but for…

His eyes go to the one person on screen that Tenma’s clearly been hyper focused on. ‘Yes, I pray for your sanity, too…’ he thought to himself. It was so clear that you had some semblance of more-than-friendly interest towards his friend, and you were clearly fishing a compliment out of him— if not just for the sake of a compliment, then to gauge his interest level in you.

Honestly, he can’t let this go any further— him snooping getting revealed be damned. Tenma’s been typing and hitting the backspace key for a solid two minutes now, he was clearly hopeless, and Kazunari? Why, he was a texting MASTER— it was his duty to help out his poor disciple.

“Tenten~♪,” as soon as the ginger’s attention broke from the phone, he quickly grabbed the device out of said person’s grasp, ignoring his indignant noises as he quickly typed in a response that seemed in-character enough for Tenma, but enough to pander to you.

When Tenma finally got his phone back, Kazunari resisted the urge to take a photo of the former’s face, morphing and reddening as he registered the rest of the messages.

“Why’d you… why’d you call them cute?” Tenma whisper-shouted, looking around to make sure no one was listening in on their conversation, before turning back to Kazunari.

“Awww, so you don’t think they’re a cutie?” Kazunari asked, clearly baiting Tenma to refute.

“That’s not what I— that’s not the point!”

Unable to hold himself back, he let out a laugh while one of the more serious parts of the show was playing out, causing several people to look at him in wonder. He doesn’t really have an explanation without exposing Tenma, so he gave the vague excuse of seeing something funny on his phone.

Not his phone, but hot diggity dog, did he see something funny alright.

There was no way he’d ever admit this to you, or to anyone for that matter, but he genuinely doesn’t understand you. You were rivals, weren’t you? Sure he expected you to be civil, but you were being so friendly and kind… and even worse, you were making him feel weird. You were making him do things he normally wouldn’t do.

He glanced down, the newly bought bouquet of roses seated on his lap as he waited for the play to start— the opening night of the play you were going to be in.

Opening night… when the others found out about it, they gave him knowing glances, playful nudges, teasing comments but really, what did it matter if he just so happened to watch on opening night of all nights? It was the night he was free on!

Besides, you were his rival in acting! Obviously, he was going to watch your performance to simultaneously check out your strengths and weaknesses as an actor— how you differed on set and on stage.

… no, that didn’t sound right, even in his head.

Then, he’s watching you because you went through the trouble of asking him for tips about acting on stage, and getting into theatre. He’s kind of like your teacher, right? So he has to support you

… that didn’t sound right, either.

Even after the play ended, he waited for the audience area to be mostly deserted before coming to find you backstage, the stage manager apparently recognising him and letting him pass without much questioning on who he was here to see.

When he finally found you, he stilled in his spot. Oh, you were with…

For a few seconds, his stomach churned, like a fiery pit burning his insides on fire without so much a regard towards any pain he’d fill and—

“Tenma-kun!”

As quickly as it arrived, the fire gets extinguished at the familiar shout of his name. That person turned to you, quickly muttering something that made you giggle, the forming frown on his lips only leaving as the other man did.

“I’m really happy you came to watch me~” you told him, a little bashfully. “My parents couldn’t come tonight, so it was nice to have someone I recognised other than my manager in the crowd.”

Right, opening night was… a lot for him, too. Tenma nodded understandingly. “Obviously? Oh and congratulations, by the way, you did really well,” he added in, watching you gingerly take the bouquet of red roses from his grasp. Your eyes turned a little softer at the present, stuck on the little tag even though all that was written on that pre-made to and from card was your name and his respectively.

“I said I’d watch you, right? Besides, just because you’re my rival doesn’t mean I’m gonna go break a promise.”

You remained silent for a minute, and he worried again if he somehow found another thing that would cause you to stop talking to him, at least for a little while— a time period just enough to bother him.

When you break your silence, you make sure to make direct eye-contact with him.

“… rival?”

“Yes?”

With a heavy sigh, you began muttering to yourself. While he wasn’t able to pick up on comprehensible sentences, your expression was enough to tell him you were annoyed.

Before he could question you, the smile returned to your face.

“You think we’re rivals? That’s a shame… I don’t see you that way at all,” you remarked offhandedly, watching Tenma’s face morph into a mixture confusion and hurt.

“What? Do you not think I’m good enough to be your—“

“Okay! Stop the thought right now!” you interrupted, shaking your head vehemently. What kind of derivation was that? “I think of us as more than rivals, is what I mean.”

Tenma’s blush seared through his cheeks, looking almost as though his face was lit up on fire. Despite this, he made no attempt to move to shield his face from your gaze, or any movement at all really— save for how he sputtered in search of some semblance of a viable reply.

“What do you… what are you trying to imply? Are you saying you think of me as a friend or—“

He gets interrupted by the sound of you giggling. “Well, the meaning can be whatever you want it to be!” you exclaimed, the tone of your voice a little mischievous as you continued, “so just let me know which one, okay?~”

[puddygeeks]

Wᴇ Cᴏᴍᴇ Rᴜɴɴɪɴɢ - Tʜᴇ 100 Bᴇʟʟᴀᴍʏ x OC - Cʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ 48: Hᴇᴀʀᴛs Tʀᴜᴇ Dᴇsɪʀᴇ

Masterlist

Rating: Mature

Summary: During her time in the Skybox, Indigo formed a precious friendship with fellow outcast Octavia Blake, the girl under the floor. At first they thought their departure from the oppression of the Ark was a blessing, but quickly came to rely on Indigo's keen survival instincts. The 100 struggle to meet the challenges of Earth whilst Bellamy strives to lead the wavering teenagers and his irresponsible attitude fuels constant conflict with Indigo. Their only shared interest is in protecting Octavia and Indigo beings to suspect that there is a deeper cause to Bellamy's seemingly irrational choices. As the consequences of his actions mount up around him, he finally begins to confide in her and she discovers more than she ever bargained for.

Fandom: CW’s The 100

Pairing: OC x Bellamy Blake

LONG TERM ONGOING PROJECT :)

My writing is entirely fuelled by coffee! If you enjoy my work, feel free to donate toward my caffeine dependency: will work for coffee

Warnings: Mature content. Non-consent, language, sex, self harm, suicide, anxiety, helplessness, torture, captivity/confinement, alcohol/drug use.

Chapter Forty-Eight

It took a couple of days for things to return to normal in camp and for my hickies to heal enough to show my face without feeling constantly self conscious. Knox made a few offhand comments about Bellamy during our shifts and I apologised for his recent intimidating behaviour. I avoided our friends for fear of any snide comments and Bellamy slipped back into his strangely inconsistent habits. 

After my shift in the kitchens, I wandered across the courtyard but my attention was caught by the sound of a nearby conversation. I paused in place to witness Mel chatting to Bellamy again and I recognised that neither of them had noticed me from the angle that I was standing in. She had her hand placed comfortably on his forearm and they were both laughing in a relaxed state. My stomach flipped with annoyance, despite my best efforts to deny it and I felt my jaw clench as I observed her making doe eyes at him. I tried to remind myself that he chose to take me back to his room every night and of all the small, attentive acts that he did daily to make my heart flutter, but they weren’t enough to remove the uneasy feeling in my chest. I rolled my eyes and dragged myself away to prevent my mind from torturing me any further. 

I found a spot near the hustle of the mechanical building to settle and work through the notes that I’d taken from my lessons with Octavia. Recently I felt that I was finally starting to grasp some parts of Trig, but it required consistent work to maintain it in my head and I had discovered that the rhythmic noises of tools helped me to focus. I heard footsteps approaching but kept my eyes trained on my papers in the hope that whoever it was would take the hint to leave me alone.

“There you are Trouble.” I recognised the gruff tone of Bellamy’s voice immediately and glanced up to find him smiling at me warmly. “Kane’s called a meeting to discuss more trips to Mount Weather for supplies, thought you’d want to know.” He stated and I raised my brows in interest. “Yeah, hopefully it won’t drag on for hours again, but if it does I’ll see you back at the room?” He added with a disinterested groan and I sympathised with his responsibility to attend.

“Damn, looks like I’ll have to tuck myself in.” I crooned with a playful expression and he chuckled lightly in a way that I adored the sound of.

“Where have you been all day anyway? I didn’t see you leave your shift.” He questioned and I was surprised that he’d even noticed the slight change in my routine. Most days lately we passed each other in camp as I moved from one commitment to the other and he’d usually throw me a cheeky wink or even slyly make an inappropriate comment if he got close enough.

“Oh, just thought I’d get some study time in.” I confirmed but he simply raised a brow at me suspiciously. “I did pass you in the courtyard earlier, but you were chatting to Mel. I thought I’d give you guys a chance to catch up.” I commented in what I hoped sounded like an idle manner and he shifted on the spot. 

“Ah, yeah she caught me for a while there.” He remarked and I concentrated heavily on maintaining a carefree posture. “She’s a nice girl, just very young. I think she’s still got a lot of training to do before I’d take her out as part of the guard.” He thought aloud and I nodded as I stared at my papers avoidantly.

“Hmm, she’ll be disappointed to be left behind. Be careful with that one.” I muttered absent mindedly and my stomach flipped as soon as the words left my mouth. He furrowed his brows at me and I cleared my throat to give myself a moment to consider my words. “Just...don’t lead her on, like you said, she’s young.” I advised with a shrug and he widened his eyes at me.

“Seriously Indie?” He drawled and I held my hands out defensively. “Look, I saved her life when she crashed to Earth, so she looks up to me. She’s another student for me to train, that’s all.” He detailed with a disbelieving tone to his voice, causing me to sigh.

“Are you sure that she knows that?” I asked as I peeked up at him and he analysed me with a slight smirk in the corner of his lips. Already, I regretted initiating this conversation and I found it difficult to discuss whilst still maintaining the casual attitude that I’d been insistent on since we started sleeping together.

“Are you jealous?” He suggested in a low growl and I scoffed in annoyance. “I did offer to train you, it’s not too late to switch classes. You can be my teacher’s pet.” He winked and I shook my head in disapproval at his continued teasing.

“No, I’m not jealous, you can do whatever you want. I’m just offering you some advice; let her down lightly so you don’t break a young girl's heart, take it or leave it.” I explained with a frustration that was evident as I shot to my feet and began to gather my things.

“It’s not like that.” He sighed in a defensive manner and I paused in place to glance at him with exasperation.

“I’m telling you as a woman what I saw in her, she wants it. You used to be excellent at recognising that. But whatever you say Bel.” I chuckled bitterly as I threw him one last look. “I’ll see you after your meeting.” I stated as I placed a chaste kiss on his cheek and left him rooted to the spot in confusion.

For a while, I managed to study in peace in the back of the mechanical building, until I was kicked out by people who needed to use the room. It was almost impossible to concentrate with the building frustration in my mind and I struggled to channel the feeling into anything beneficial. After several attempts to find something to distract myself, I received a message from Raven requesting my assistance with something.

“Hey! Octavia said you were trying to build muscle, right?” She spoke in a rushed way as she opened the door to allow me into her workshop and pulled me inside. I nodded hesitantly and she guided me to a metal structure that made absolutely no sense to me, beside the familiar Rover we’d just recovered. “Awesome, I have a proposal that will be mutually beneficial in that case. I need to install some upgrades but I can’t get around that easily with my bitch of a leg. Can you lift shit for me?” She asked and I noticed the slightest hint of vulnerability in her eyes. It was the first time that she had requested assistance with her injury from me and it felt strange to address the thing that we’d fallen into a routine of pretending hadn’t changed. I knew that admitting she needed help was practically agonising to Raven and felt honoured that she was able to confide in me.

“Of course, but you need to remember that I am, in fact, an idiot. So I’ll need very specific instructions on what you want me to do.” I remarked with a playful expression and was glad to notice that her shoulders visibly relaxed. We fell into an easy companionship as she worked whilst I strained to hold things in place and chatted in the same comfortable way that we always had.

“So, what do you think will come of this big leader meeting your man’s in?” She called from under the car and I sighed thoughtfully. I couldn’t imagine anything worse than sitting in a room full of self important people discussing every minor decision for our camp. It seemed simpler in the days at the dropship, where if something needed to be done we simply took action. I was unsure if the introduction of laws and politics was as beneficial as the leadership believed.

“I don’t know, bunch of political nonsense. I bet Bellamy’s struggling to even stay awake in there.” I commented lightly, imagining him dozing off at the end of the table and I heard Raven hum in agreement.

“Well, looks like he had some comfort before he went in.” She stated in a voice that I recognised well as bait and so I held my tongue. When I didn’t answer, she slid out from the car to examine me in annoyance. “I caught Mel flirting with him pretty hard outside the meeting room. She’s getting her claws right in.” She spat before she got to her feet and dusted herself off. The work space was so large that our voices echoed around it and I was glad that it was just the two of us here with the sharpness of her words.

“Ugh, that poor girl.” I groaned and Raven whipped around to face me as if I’d just grown another head. “I told him to let her down gently before she gets her feelings hurt.” I revealed as I rubbed my forehead in stress and she dropped into a seat to examine me with a riveted interest.

“And? What did he say?” She breathed with a fire burning in her eyes and I couldn’t help a slight snigger at the ridiculous reaction. Recently, it felt as if the budding romance between Bellamy and I was her favourite topic and although I appreciated her support, I couldn’t help finding her enthusiasm bizarre at times.

“He doesn’t think she’s flirting. He says she just looks up to him like the others, or she’s just friendly because she’s grateful to him.” I sighed as I settled into a seat opposite her and she threw her hands up in exaggeration. “I’ve never known him to be so blind to a girl's interest before.” I muttered with a groan and I tried to force the bitter feelings to the back of my mind before they could wander out of my mouth.

“That’s because he only has eyes for you.” She crooned in a mocking tone as she batted her lashes at me and I reached out to slap her playfully on the arm. “Doesn’t it bug you? Seriously, I’m worried. I know you were afraid before all this almost dying stuff, about him losing interest? I don’t want you to be pushed to the point of a nervous breakdown by this random chick.” She dropped her voice to one of genuine concern and I smiled warmly at her ill guided compassion. 

“Before everything went down, yes I was. But I already had my nervous breakdown Raven, I’m tapped. Seriously, thinking that you’ll never see someone again kind of changes your priorities.” I explained as she watched me with blatant sympathy. “The way I see it now, Bellamy will do whatever it is that he wants to do. If he wants to fuck some other girl, he’ll do it whether I worry about it or not, so I’m not gonna worry about it. I’m just gonna enjoy whatever we have for as long as it lasts, cause I don’t want to waste a single second of it.” I elaborated and she scoffed as she viewed me with a sense of utter disbelief.

“You’re telling me that you’re just switching your ‘give a shit’ off?” She breathed as she crossed her arms and I sighed as I tried to think of a better way to explain my stance. I shuffled on my seat and rubbed at my temples as she observed my expectantly.

“I’m not switching it off. It was only weeks ago that I thought he was dead and I spent almost all of my time crying.” I revealed and she softened her face. “I reflected a lot on everything I’d learned and I know that Bellamy is the kind of guy who likes the chase. From what I’ve seen, he’s not big on the whole commitment thing and I don’t need it. I’m all too aware that things can change in a heartbeat and honestly, I’m just happy every time that he comes back from a mission alive. I’m glad that I get the chance to see that smile that makes my knees go weak and my heart beat so fast that I think it might explode.” I confessed and Raven smiled smugly.

“Girl, you’ve got it bad!” She laughed and I felt as if I had opened a door that I couldn’t close. The relief of being honest with her was so addictive that the words just continued to flow out of my mouth and the memory of him and Mel talking filled my mind, causing a surge of bitterness.

“I know! God I know.” I breathed as I ran my hands through my hair in a gesture of stress. “Who am I kidding with this whole chilled out act? Part of me wants to find that girl and go full grounder on her ass, tell her that if she even thinks about touching Bellamy I’ll beat her face in.” I growled and Raven whooped in support of this idea. “On the inside, even thinking about him with anyone else kills me, but then I remember how fucking grateful I am that he’s alive and I realise that I’d suffer through anything if it meant that he was happy.” I clarified and she pursed her lips at me with enjoyment.

“I’m pretty confident that he feels the same.” She commented and although I noticed that she didn’t seem to be smiling directly at me, I was too deep in thought to question it. She opened her mouth to speak again but I couldn’t stop the flow of feelings that I needed to speak aloud.

“Maybe, I guess only time will tell. For now, all I know is that I can barely think straight every time he compliments me, or does that thing where he shakes his head and looks at the ground when he laughs. You know, I dream about him, his freckles, the way his eyes glisten when he smiles, or how he runs his hand through his hair when he’s concentrating. I thought that after a while things would calm down, but Raven, every kiss makes my head spin like the first.” I rambled in an emotion charged blur. She watched me with a steadily growing satisfaction as I bared my soul to her and I only paused to sigh. “I’m pretty prepared for the idea that he doesn’t feel the same way, but that's okay. Because if I can just keep him in my life for as long as humanly possible, I’m willing to accept that.” I divulged with a final deep breath as I dropped my shoulders dramatically and finally felt a sense of peace that I hadn’t realised I sorely needed.

“You know, I really think you’d be surprised by how wrong you are about that.” She stated calmly despite an excitement shining in her eyes and I furrowed my brows at her in confusion.

“How can you be so sure?” I enquired with a heavy feeling of insecurity and a delighted smile spread across her lips at my question.

“Oh, just the little fact that he’s standing right behind you and he looks like he’s just won the jackpot, not running for the hills.” She revealed with a blatant enjoyment and I felt my face drop to one of pure horror. I prayed with all of my might that she was simply playing a cruel prank. I was too mortified to turn around to investigate and before I could muster up the courage, I heard a deep voice clear their throat behind me. I felt like my stomach was about to drop out of my body as I closed my eyes in a grimace and heard Raven stand. “I’ll leave you two to talk.” She commented calmly.

I remained frozen on the spot with my eyes firmly closed in an effort to shield myself from the reality of my mistake and heard Bellamy carefully approaching to shatter the hopes of my ‘I can't see you, you can’t see me’ logic. There was a feeling of dread that crept down my spine as I sensed his gaze burning into me and I took a deep breath before forcing myself to look at him. His eyes sparkled with a mixture of amusement and exhilaration, and I gulped nervously whilst my mind desperately strained for something to say. I fiddled with the zip on my jacket and my skin burned with humiliation.

“H-how much of that did you hear?” I stuttered as I peeked at him and squirmed in anticipation. My words repeated in my mind and as I reviewed all the things that he’d potentially overhead that I would rather chop off a limb than say to him, I felt like my heart might stop.

“All of it.” He breathed with a sly smile and I felt my heart skip a beat as I groaned. I felt a wave of nausea wash over me and thought that I would give anything for the chance to take it all back. Terror flooded my veins at the idea that the blissful bubble we’d existed in until now could be about to burst and I steeled myself for the potential heartbreak.

“Is there...any chance that you can just forget that you heard any of it?” I suggested with shaking hands and he did the exact thing that I’d just proclaimed my love for: chuckled lightly as he shook his head and gradually returned his gaze to me with a smile that made my head spin. “Cool, perfect. Well, if you didn’t specifically need me for anything, I’m gonna go blow my brains out.” I remarked with my hands in my pockets and I avoided meeting his eyes as I moved to stride away. I only managed a single step before he caught my arm and pulled me back to face him.

“Indie, don’t worry about it, it’s okay.” He stated as he studied me with an inscrutable expression and I was stressed by the action of locking eyes with him. I sighed as I shuffled on the spot and he reached out to place his hands on my shoulders. I couldn’t tell if he did this more as an act of comfort, or to prevent me from bolting, or maybe a combination of both. “You don’t have to be embarrassed with me. Was all that true?” He probed as he examined my face and I nodded reluctantly. “Why didn’t you say something sooner if it was bothering you so much?” He interrogated and I shrugged avoidantly.

“I don’t know, it seemed dumb.” I grumbled as I tried to push aside the urge to escape. I cleared my throat and decided that if we were going to have this conversation, I may as well say what I needed. “Why weren’t you just honest about Knox?” I enquired and Bellamy shrugged in defeat. This relieved some of the tension in the air as we acknowledged that we’d both played a part in creating this situation with our ridiculous behaviours and for a moment I broke into a smile as I viewed him. 

“You know that you don’t have to worry about me with Mel, or anyone else, right?” He suggested as I fixed him with a baffled expression. “I don’t need anything else when I have everything I want with you.” He admitted with a genuine tone and I scoffed in disbelief. He took my face in his hands to force me to meet his eyes and I was surprised by the intensity of his gaze. “I’m serious. You’re beautiful, funny, smart. You give me advice when I need it and you keep me going. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” He confessed and I stared back at him with wide eyes. “I know you had a hard time in Mount Weather, Love, but you’re forgetting that whilst you were there, I lost you too. You're not the only one who had a reality check. I’ve had plenty of time to think and finally getting you back has made me realise that I don’t ever want to lose you again, not to anything.” He paused to bite his lip and I noticed a hint of vulnerability that he tried to conceal. “You’re my girl, I don’t want anyone to question that anymore, especially not you.” He emphasised and I felt a smile breaking through my concern.

“Are you asking me to be your girlfriend, Bellamy Blake?” I crooned with a warmth spreading in my chest as the reality of his words struck me. He tilted his head closer and I bit my lip with a rush of excitement.

“I’m not asking.” He drawled before he leaned in to finally kiss me. The moment that his lips touched mine, I felt a sense of relief and there was a peace that I had craved for longer than I had realised. Thanks to Raven’s gamble, I had security at last.

***

The tension that had been hanging over us completely dissipated over the past few weeks and although we’d been too busy to see much of each other, it didn’t cause any stress now that we knew where we stood. Bellamy had received a whole new batch of volunteers for the guard, which translated into far more frequent shifts for him with the recruits and my training with Octavia had ramped up a notch now that she was starting to see progress. Monty had somehow convinced Jasper to start taking some of his shifts back in mechanical, which was a relief as Monty was looking rather bedraggled recently. 

I’d used my new additional free time to either work on building muscle, or studying Trig. I was able to hold almost entire conversations in it now and although I still made the occasional mistake or found worlds that I hadn’t learned, I was proud of the new skill. It was a surprise to discover that Lincoln was slightly chattier in his native tongue and I’d come to appreciate our conversations more due to their infrequency. We bonded mostly over a joint protectiveness of Octavia, but I also enjoyed the quiet wisdom about him that I witnessed more now that he had moved into Arkadia. It was strange to see him living amongst us after our violent beginnings, but he seemed to be adapting well and fell into communicating with other campers far better than I ever would have expected. I was studying in the courtyard of camp, enjoying the cool spring sunshine when Monty rushed over.

“Hey Indie, have you seen Jasper?” He queried with blatant fear filling his face and something about his manner immediately put me on edge.

“No, I’m sorry.” I answered and he hissed in response. “I thought he was doing a shift today? Is everything okay?” I investigated as he shuffled on the spot with distress and I analysed him worriedly.

“He was, he didn’t turn up and I’ve only just heard. No one’s seen him all day and it’s been hours since he left dorms.” He confirmed with his brows deeply furrowed and I quickly got to my feet to assist.

“You want me to take this to Bel, get a search party out or are we keeping this on the down low?” I breathed as I felt his panic bleeding into me and my heart hammered in my chest.

“Let’s just keep it between us for now, I don’t want to get Jasper in trouble.” He muttered and I nodded obediently.

“Alright, let’s split up and meet back here if you can’t find him.” I suggested and we rushed apart in search of him.

I checked anywhere that I thought Jasper was likely to attend for fun first, in the vain hope that he may finally have felt like enjoying himself. When that failed, I had to acknowledge the painful thought that he may have gone somewhere quiet to harm himself and I felt an overpowering anxiety building in me as I searched the secluded areas where I thought it would be easiest to do this. I passed Monty in the mechanical building as we both seemed to have the same idea to investigate the unused rooms and abandoned corners. 

In one of the final rooms, I turned to leave when I noticed a boot out of the corner of my eye. I crouched down to examine it and discovered Jasper passed out under a table. I gasped as I neared him in terror and immediately checked for any sign of a pulse. An intense wave of relief washed over me as I confirmed that he was alive and I leaned closer to the door to call out.

“Monty! In here!” I cried, before returning to Jasper to pull him across my lap. I shook him until he responded as I became fearful that he could have overdosed and he groaned dramatically but didn’t seem to be able to wake. Monty stumbled into the room in a fluster and I smiled up at him. “I’ve got him.” I confirmed but Monty could clearly see the concern in my eyes as he glanced between me and Jasper, whose head flopped back in my arms.

“Ugh, he’s tanked.” Monty stated and as I turned to view him doubtfully, I noticed the empty flask further under the desk. “I’d recognise that look on him anywhere. Damn it, Jasper.” He growled with an evident frustration and I sighed in disappointment as I scooped up the evidence to hide in my pocket. “Can you help me get him back to dorms?” Monty asked with an embarrassed expression and I nodded in understanding.

“Of course, my love.” I answered as I got to my feet and we managed to hoist him between us with difficulty. He was barely conscious enough to manage to walk with some stern encouragement and his arms over our shoulders to keep him upright.

“You’re a mess, dude.” Monty scolded, but Jasper only managed an offended groan in response. Monty rolled his eyes and sighed. “I’m sorry about this Indie.” He mumbled awkwardly.

“Hey, it’s fine. Family isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, right?” I smiled encouragingly at him and he made his best effort to return it. 

[greyias]

FIC: Smoke and Mirrors - Chapter 16

Title: Smoke and Mirrors Fandom: SWTOR Pairing: Theron Shan/f!Jedi Knight Rating: T Genre: Pre-Relationship, Slow Burn Synopsis: Something’s rotten on Carrick Station, and Theron won’t rest until he finds out what. But picking at the frayed threads of suspicion quickly unravels a conspiracy much larger than even the Republic’s top spy can handle on his own. (A mostly canon-compliant retelling of the Forged Alliances storyline, as seen through the eyes of Theron Shan.) Author’s Notes and Spoilers: See Chapter 1.

Chapter Index: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | Crossposted to AO3

As far as targets went, Rian Darok was proving to be an exceptionally dull one. The contents of his schedule turned out to be incredibly mundane, as it just consisted of meetings with other SpecOps officers. Once he returned to Coruscant, there had been a brief hope that would uncover the proverbial smoking blaster. However, it seemed to lead to just more meetings, and an interminable amount of time spent in front of a data terminal searching for nothing of interest whatsoever.

The low-profile made sense, though. If Darok had a hand in what happened with Tython, that kind of thing would have taken a lot of time to plan out. Theron had tried scrubbing through the man’s personnel files on his breaks, but it was spotless. There was zero indication that Darok was anything but a loyal citizen of the Republic, and had no reason to collude with the Empire. In fact, he probably had more reason than most soldiers to hold a grudge. In fact, according to his personnel record, he probably had more reason than most soldiers to hold a grudge. He was the sole survivor of an Imperial attack on the Dorin’s Sky while it had been serving in the Nanth’ri System...

The location gave Theron pause, and he stared at Darok’s file. The galaxy was a big place, and seasoned veterans would have served all over the map, but that particular system was familiar. Wasn’t that the same system where Revan had fallen to an Imperial strike team? That same funny feeling that had been haunting him since this whole thing had started crept up again, starting at the base of his spine and slowly crawling its way up, until every hair on the back of his neck stood on end. It was circumstantial at best but… it was odd how connections to Revan kept popping up. First with Jensyn, and now Darok. 

If he didn’t know better, he’d almost suspect they had some little secret club. Of course, that didn’t make much sense. Revan was dead, and all of these connections were just… coincidence. Funny. The timing of the attacks on Tython and Korriban were supposed to be coincidences too.

He glared at Darok’s file, but it didn’t yield any further insights or secrets.

The Tython investigation was beginning to wrap up, and Trant had begun to redirect resources. The Analytics Division was moving on from post-mortem reports to dig into the data that Theron had managed to extract from Korriban during the strike team’s raid. Of course, that wasn’t sitting well with Theron either. His data was clean, he knew that, but the intel that had started all of this mess, the one that they’d raided Korriban for had yet to be turned over to the SIS yet. 

The last time Theron had asked the Director about it, the face that Marcus had made would have been almost comical. Almost, because a lot of people had died for that data, and now it was apparently lost in some military bureaucracy. Theron considered calling in a favor from dear old dad, see if maybe he could grease the wheels. But that might call too much attention to the fact that Theron was very interested in the origins of all of this.

So unless he wanted to try and involve more people in his crazy conspiracy chase, it was best that he not attract to much attention. He still hadn’t found any proof yet to sound an alarm, just a bunch of odd coincidences and interesting pieces of trivia with nothing to connect them all together. He stared at the terminal in front of him, absently tapping his finger on the keys.

Highwind had reported that Darok, or some men under his direction, had been unusually interested in the Jedi’s library. Theron pulled up the official investigation into the Tython attack. He tried to scan through the findings, but only found reports on destruction, compromised terminals, and some missing artifacts.

With a glance to his surroundings, he slipped out the private datapad he’d been conducting his own personal investigation on, and did a quick check on the current whereabouts of The Defender. It appeared that she’d been called back into duty to help mediate a dispute of succession for House Barnaba in the Tapani sector. He tapped the bezel of the datapad, wondering if it was too soon to say anything, considering he hadn’t uncovered anything yet. The nagging thought about the Archives wouldn’t leave him, so he pulled up his empty inbox, and began to compose a message:

To: Greyias Highwind From: Theron Shan Subject: Nothing Noteworthy Yet

I wish I could say I’ve found something, but it’s been a slow two weeks since I last wrote. The life of a SpecOps commander is apparently very mundane most of the time, filled with meetings, meetings, and more meetings. And when not meeting, apparently they’re in front of a terminal cruising the HoloNet. I’d say your taxes at work, but you don’t really take a salary do you? Still, you get that fancy ship, so I guess that’s something.

I’ve been knee deep in this investigation on Tython. There’s a lot of data on damage inflicted, suggestions for beefing up security, how security failed, and what was taken. It’s a lot, is what I’m saying, and I’m still sorting through it. I keep thinking about our mutual friend and the library though, and what might have been so interesting there. Just trying to find some correlation between that and what we’ve gotten from Korriban.

Just to keep busy mind you, since our buddy is boring me keeping such a low profile. You ever hear anything interesting about that before your trip to Barnaba?

He stared at the letter for a few moments, recalling the previous communication he’d received, and added one last bit:

I also feel the need to let you know that as vast as they are, the SIS databases aren’t all-knowing. There’s a lot of entries on famous pieces of jewelry around the galaxy, but nothing about this bracelet you keep bringing up. Still want me to keep looking?

Satisfied, he sent off the letter, and stowed the datapad away for now. He’d have to wait for answers, and in the meantime, had to close out the official report on Tython.

When he’d mentioned that the intel side of his job was boring, he wasn’t kidding. There was a lot of snooping, and occasionally some fast-paced running, but there was a lot of waiting that wound up happening between discoveries. The first one came in via official channels, an intel request from Darok on "Isotope-5 Proliferations and Deployment in the Empire". Theron was pretty familiar with the contents of that already, and it made perfect sense for the colonel to be requesting it considering the devastation wreaked by the Iso-5 bombs on Tython.

The second one came to him as he was getting himself another cup of caf from the community carafe, although the sudden arm flung around his shoulders made him nearly spill his drink. Theron at first thought he was being assaulted, and it was only his quick recognition of who the arm belonged to that saved its owner from having his face shoved into the wall.

“Shan,” Jonas exclaimed, “why haven’t we gone out again?”

“Because you’re still banned from the Dealer’s Den for cheating?”

“I do not cheat!” Jonas proclaimed loudly, then leaned close. Theron felt something being slid into his pocket and heard a quick whisper. “This qualified as weird for me. Mind telling me what you’re up to?”

Theron shot him a glance and shook his head minutely, and then made a show of elbowing him away. “You might be right, I hear there might be a crooked dealer there.”

“I don’t like to accuse people of cheating without proof,” Jonas said carefully. “Being wrong about that’s almost as bad as cheating itself.”

“As I said, I just heard, never confirmed.”

Jonas pressed his lips together in a thin line, a little concern surfacing through his cheery facade. “I’ve got to run to Denon, I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it for a rematch at Dealer’s Den for a while.”

“That’s too bad,” Theron said casually, “I wouldn’t mind having another go myself.”

“I’m not a fan of drinking alone, Shan. Gets rather lonely. You really shouldn’t either.”

“I’m touched by your concern for my social life, Balkar, but I’ll be fine.”

“I’m more concerned about that face jumping in front of more incoming fists. Or maybe getting a vibro-knife in the back. Bar fights can easily get out of hand.”

“Funny how that doesn’t stop you from getting into them when I’m around.”

“That’s because we’re both there,” the joking edge from Jonas’s tone was rapidly fading away. “I’m just saying, it’s not a good idea to take on heavy hitters without someone backing you up.”

It probably had been too much to hope that Jonas wouldn’t get some clue of what Theron was doing in his off time after their last drinking session. It was clear that his occasional partner was not going to let this drop, and if he kept the conversation going too long it was going to attract attention.

“What if I took a date?”

“I might get jealous if you start running around on me with another drinking partner. Does he have a good right hook?”

Theron shrugged. “Hers is better than yours, that’s for sure.”

“Her?” Jonas’s eyebrows shot up, intrigued. “This the same girl we talked about last time?”

“Could be.”

“Well, in that case I guess I’ll allow it.”

“You’ll allow it? What are you, my keeper?”

“When you’re being a careless idiot? Yes,” Jonas ground out. “You don’t always look both ways before leaping into oncoming traffic.”

“I’m always careful, and I’m never an idiot,” he corrected.

“You still leap into traffic, though.”

“Have to get across the street somehow. Crosswalks are boring.”

“You’re the worst sort of pedestrian.” Jonas shook his head, and then fixed Theron with a hard, serious look. “Just watch yourself, okay?”

“Don’t I always?”

“No,” he said, “that’s why I’m saying it. Don’t make me find another drinking buddy, Shan.”

“I already told you, we’re not bud—”

Jonas cut him off with a glare, and the usual retort died on Theron’s lips. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and let out a sigh. “Fine. We’ll get another round next time we’re both in town. Happy?”

“Ecstatic,” Jonas said flatly. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a date with the least chatty person in the Denon system. Can’t be late for that.”

“Have fun,” Theron intoned as his fellow agent left as quickly as he came, leaving Theron alone with his caf.

He glanced around, sipping from his mug and making his way back to the data terminal he’d staked out. As he sat down, he fingered what had been slipped into his pocket, marking out the familiar shape of a data chip. Considering the ruckus Jonas had made, it would be best to look at it in the relative privacy of his apartment. 

The rest of the hours dragged by, as he found it hard to focus. His eyes kept straying to the chronometer at his station, as his mind kept straying to the data chip and Jonas’s ill-concealed concerns. He’d tossed Highwind’s name in the conversation to get the other man to back down, but he still wasn’t sure exactly what role the Jedi should play in all of this. She’d provide ample muscle if he needed to make a show of force, but he still had to wonder about her reliability.

She’d been all too eager to throw in with him to uncover the truth behind the attack on Tython, but enthusiasm didn’t earn any extra points with him. If anything, it only puzzled him more. He’d expected a far more grizzled, no-nonsense Jedi from what he’d read in her dossier, and he’d seen some hints of a more battle-hardened personality emerging when she was leading the strike teams. There almost seemed to be a different person that emerged when the pressure wasn’t on. He wouldn’t describe that as normal, because she came across far too earnest and almost compassionate to a fault. When he tried to mesh those observations with her record, including the curious gaps and sparse mission details that smelled of a coverup—he was just left with more questions.

Theron didn’t like questions, as it meant he was lacking intel. And not having the right answers could get him killed in the wrong situation. It was hard to say if this was one of those cases, as he tended to lean on the more paranoid side of things. It still bugged him, though. He preferred to know exactly what and who he was dealing with. Maybe if he’d known more about Darok before taking on the Korriban op, things would be very different right now.

His eyes strayed back to the chrono, watching as another minute ticked by at an agonizingly slow pace, and he tried to calculate the time that had passed since his last missive to The Defender. The previous replies had come in rather quick, but he was already nearing seven days without a response. It didn’t bother him exactly, as it was obvious that there were more important things for a Jedi Knight to be doing than checking her inbox constantly. And considering the six-month gap in her dossier, her being out of contact wasn’t exactly an abnormal occurrence.

Maybe after he looked at whatever Jonas had dug up, Theron would check in on the HoloNet and see what was happening in the Tapani Sector.

Just out professional curiosity. That was all it was.

[susspirria]

Make Me - Chapter One

Pairing: Handsome Jack/Rhys

Summary: After Rhys' bratty misbehavior and need for attention nearly causes a minor scandal for Hyperion, Jack takes him on a vacation to his private cabin in Promethea for a much needed attitude adjustment.

Tags/Warnings: Bratting,BDSM Scene,Dom/sub,Daddy Kink,Cock Cages,Suspension,Rough Sex,SpankingImpact Play,Orgasm Delay/Denial,Sex Toys Under Clothing Aftercare,Blindfolds,Masochism,Sadism,Come Marking,Creampie,Public Humiliation,Risk Aware Consensual Kink, Bondage

(Read here on ao3 or under the cut!)

Even after being Handsome Jack’s protege and pretty little pet for nearly three years, Rhys could never get used to how mercurial and hectic the older man’s schedule was. He could never help getting his hopes every time the two of them made plans together, only to get miserable and disappointed when Jack would end up canceling on them.

This day was no different, which was incredibly disappointing because Rhys had really gone all out for Jack this time. They had planned a night in, a romantic dinner and some private time together he had cooked a three course meal that consisted of: A tomato bisque as an appetizer, lemon chicken piccata as a main course and a vanilla panna cotta for dessert. He had dressed himself up in silk and lace lingerie underneath his best suit, so that Jack would be in for a pleasant surprise when he finally got Rhys undressed. He had been really looking forward to sitting in the older mans’ lap, having Jack fawn over him like he was something special. He always did, he loved when Jack was able to pay him attention and spoil him – he had been so deprived of it lately and it was driving him up the wall. Jack knew that, and he had promised that he would make all those late nights and canceled plans up to him.

Rhys waited in their penthouse, “casually” posing himself in a way that he hoped looked sexy to the older man on the love seat in their living room – so that he would be one of the first things that Jack saw when he strode through the front door. And he waited, and waited… and waited. As patiently as he could, but after a while, he got sick and tired of waiting and decided to send Jack a message.

[To Jack: Hey handsome, where are you? I’m already all dressed up and I got everything ready for you ;)]

After about five minutes – which, in Rhys’ mind was way too long of a wait – he finally got his response.

[From Jack: Sorry princess cant make it. Emergenc meeting w/Jakobs]

Rhys sighed in disappointment, before he started typing away – trying not to call Jack up and chew him out. It was the third time that something like this had happened this month alone and he was getting sick of it.

[To Jack: What, seriously? What the hell, Jack, we’ve been planning this for weeks!]

[From Jack: U know how those idiots are Ill make it up to you I promise bby 😘😘 😘]

Rhys sincerely doubted that, as far as he was concerned Handsome Jack’s promises held very little weight. He pouted and threw his comm down on the bed, letting it bounce of a few inches away from him. “Whatever.” He mumbled to himself, before he grabbed his comm again and decided to dial up Fiona and Sasha. He could have hung out with Vaughn, but that would have just been another chill night in and that was the opposite of what he wanted. He wanted to get so drunk that he could forget about how miserable being stood up by his boyfriend – again – made him feel.

Fiona answered the phone on the second ring, “What do you want, Rhys?” She said, instead of greeting him like a person, in a tired and grumpy sounding tone of voice.

Rhys pursed his lips at that, “Hello to you too, Fiona!” He replied, just as snide and sarcastic as she came off. “I’m doing great thanks for asking, you’re such a kind and considerate friend. Love that for you.” He bitterly sniped at her.

Fiona laughed sarcastically in reply to that. “Thanks, I try.” She said, “But seriously, why are you calling me in the middle of the night?” She asked, “You never call anymore…unless you want something.” She reminded him, speaking in a wistful sort of tone. Usually when he wanted to do something suspect or morally questionable things, he would call her or Sasha up. It wasn’t like Fiona was blaming him, though, it wasn’t like he could ask Vaughn or Yvette if either of them wanted to go to the up over bar, get blackout drunk and scam some scavengers out of their life savings. That was something that only the three of them could do together.

Rhys was quiet for a few moments, “…Jack stood me up.” He admitted. He was pretty sure that Fiona could hear him pouting all the way from Elpis.

“Again?” She asked, amusement obvious in her tone of voice. “Why don’t you just dump him at this point, if he neglects you so much?” She added, with some mock pity.

“What, no!” He snapped back, “No, I just-” He cut himself off with a pitiful whine. “He’s been so busy! It’s been at least weeks since we’ve had some personal time together. I’m getting so-”

“I really don’t want to know about your-” Fiona attempted to interrupt.

“Lonely.” Rhys finished lamely. “Agh! He sucks so much, he always does this. I just… are you guys still on Elpis?” He asked hopefully.

“Yes…?”

“You want to hang out?” He asked, in a pleading tone. “We could go to the up over bar. See what kind of fancy cocktails they have there this week.” He added, a smirk playing on his lips.

“Depends.” Fiona replied. “Are you buying?”

“Jack’s buying.” Rhys said with a smirk as he fiddled with the black card that Jack had gifted him a few months back.

The Up Over Bar looked nearly identical to when it had been run by Moxxi. The only difference is that Moxxi wasn’t sitting behind the bar. The cocktails were the same, the atmosphere was the same, every single thing was the same. Rhys loved coming here, it was comforting to him and the cocktails were great. When Rhys arrived at the bar, Fiona and Sasha were sitting there in wait for him at one of the booths. Sasha waved him over and loudly exclaimed his name. Rhys skipped over to them and greeted them with as much enthusiasm as he could manage with how low he felt.

Both of the sisters had a bad habit of, for as long as Rhys had known them and they had been friends with each other, encouraging his worst behaviors. So, when Rhys had gotten a few bottles of the most expensive liquor that Jack’s credit card could buy and suggested that they do shots they had – of course – agreed heartily to it. It didn’t take them long to regret that, because soon enough, Rhys was falling over drunk and dancing on tables with strangers – and even then the two of them kept on encouraging him to make a fool of himself for their own entertainment.

It didn’t take long for Rhys’ behavior to spiral out into something that they couldn’t do much damage control over – and soon enough the three of them were thrown out of the bar for the night. Rhys flipped off the guard as he was escorted outside and giggled at the brawny looking man when he shook his head at Rhys. Then he turned to Fiona, “You guys want to do some shopping?” He asked and then, eyeing their clothes. “I can get you guys something new to wear.” He added, “Looks like you need it.”

“God, just shut up, Rhys.” Sasha said.

Fiona just rolled her eyes, “Why don’t we get something to eat.” She suggested, looking at the way that sloppy Rhys was carrying himself with a lot of judgment. “Especially you.” She added, equally judgmental.

Rhys sighed and made a big show of rolling his eyes. “Okay, fine.” He said, before he was led along to a little twenty four hour diner in the middle of Concordia. The three of them sat down at the bar, and soon enough Rhys was recognized by a well dressed man donned in hues of yellows and blues – Maliwan colors, he thought. Probably a Maliwan rep. “Hey, I know you!” one of them said, as he slotted himself between Rhys and his friends. It was rude and Fiona commented as much, but she was ignored by them. “You’re Handsome Jack’s… assistant, right?” He guessed.

Rhys nodded even though calling him Jack’s assistant wasn’t completely accurate, and smiled as politely as he could with how drunk he was and ordered a bunch of carb-ladened foods from the bot manning the diner, so that he could have a little of everything. Maliwan guy continued on, laying it on incredibly thick. Rhys smiled at that, remembering fondly the way that Jack kept a hand on Rhys’ hip – holding him close and possessive as he condescended to the other CEO’s and big wigs of the other corporations. Then his mood soured as he thought of how distant he was now.

“God, I can’t imagine what it’s like working for Handsome Jack.” Maliwan Guy commented in a wistful sort of way. “It must be amazing. And terrifying. And amazing!” He was really was laying it on thick.

Rhys rolled his eyes and let out a little scoff, like even the concept of admiring or fearing Jack was entirely ridiculous. “Not really. He’s such a prick.” He said, without even thinking about it.

Maliwan Guy’s eyes narrowed in an almost predatory fashion, like he had been aiming for something like this to happen. “Really?” He said, with a bad imitation of sympathy lacing his voice, “Why would you say that?” He asked.

That didn’t sound good to Sasha and she decided to intervene. “Okay Rhys, I know you’re mad at Jack – I don’t blame you, either, but maybe you should calm down a bit.” Sasha suggested, realizing that this would probably not end well for him if this guy was even half as skeevy as he looked. For all they knew, he could be trying to wrangle Rhys into drinking roofied cocktails or filming blackmail material. Anything was possible, considering his very public status as Handsome Jack’s boyfriend.

Rhys shrugged her off, “N-no! You wanna know about Handsome Jack, I’ll tell ya all about Handsome Jack.” He said, pulling the man – what was his name again? Had Rhys even asked? He could barely remember – closer to him. “I’ll tell ya the whole stoooory jus’- uh, just hear me out.” He promised, putting his hand on the other mans chest in an overly friendly manner for how little he knew the man.

“Great!” Maliwan guy answered, with a smug smile spreading across his face. “I’d love to hear all about it.” He added, in a bad attempt at a comforting tone of voice. It was obviously fake, but Rhys was a little too drunk to think of it as anything other than genuine concern for him.

“Oh god.” Fiona mumbled to herself, while Rhys ranted away at what a terrible, useless, boyfriend Handsome Jack was, not noticing the fact that he was being filmed by Maliwan guy. He wasn’t even trying hard to hide the fact that he was. Sasha put her face in her hands, just as mortified as her sister was. The two of them didn’t let that go on for more than a few minutes before they decided to seriously intervene.

“What. Nooooo, you guys are so booooooring! I wanna have more fun here.” He argued, weakly trying to pull them off of him. Fiona and Sasha shrugged him off like he was nothing, “I wanna drink more, and – and dance and shit.” He added in a simpering tone. “I thought you guys were fun…”

They pointedly ignored any of his argumentations. “I think you’ve had enough tonight.” Sasha said, manhandling him around with little regard for his sense of personal space or boundaries. “Of everything.”

“He’s gonna kill you.” Fiona told him as she and Sasha dragged him back to the shuttle. “You know that, right?”

“Whooooo’s gonna kill me?” He drunkenly asked, lolling his head to the side sleepily. The two sisters gave each other a look and the two of them made the journey back to Rhys’ apartment in almost total silence. Once they finally got there, they deposited him on his bed and sternly told him to drink some water and prepare to deal with the consequences of his stupid, drunken actions.

Rhys was still cognizant – and petty – enough that, once he was alone in the penthouse, he decided to send Jack a few more angry messages.

[To Jack: I hate u ur suck a jerk] [> such!!! ur such a jerk] [> u leftttt me alll alon e aga in]

Then Rhys set up his camera, taking a few photos of him in the lingerie, before he stripped out of it for the night. After he sent the photos, he sent Jack a few more messages.

[To Jack: ths is wat u missed o ut on,,, asshole] [> hav fukkin fun @ werk I gues u fukin dik]

He passed out, with his comm pressed to his face, before he managed to send Jack another incredibly aggressive ‘goodnight.’ message. It was probably for the best that he did.

Jack stood, with blood caking his fingernails as he interrogated the paparazzi scum that was in front of him. The idiot had burst into his office, with a smug expression on his face as he declared that he had some unflattering material on Rhys – and if he didn’t want it to get out to the rest of the world, then he better pay up. It was hilarious, in a pathetic and stupid sort of way. This small time loser trying to extort him – trying to extort Handsome Jack of all people – with a few measly photos and some videos.

Needless to say, Jack had shot him in the leg and tied him to a chair. He decided to take his time with this one – just for managing to get his attention, and pissing him off while he was at it. By the time that Jack was done with him, he was nothing more than gristle and bone – a husk strapped to the chair, still twitching as his dead body rattled. “Rhysie.” Jack breathed into his echo as he took practically hyperventilated from the adrenaline that was rushing through him. He always felt rejuvenated after a kill. “Get up to my office, cupcake. I got a surprise for ya!” He laughed, looking at the dead creep in front of him and then down at his bloody clothes. “It’s a killer.”

It wasn’t like Hyperion – or him – was in any real danger, at least not from that idiot. But it could have been, if Rhys had been unfortunate enough to talk to a slightly more intelligent moron. So Jack decided to call Rhys up for a much needed attitude adjustment. Rhys didn’t notice anything off in his tone and grumbled, “It’s my day off though…” He said and Jack could practically hear him pouting and rolling over in bed, cocooning himself further into the covers as he tried to block out Jack’s demanding tenor.

Jack’s tone turned serious, demanding and domineering – just how Rhys always liked him. “I’m not asking you, princess.” He said, “I’m telling you. Y’know, as your boss.” He reminded him. Rhys grumbled a bit before he hung up. He was at the door in nearly five minutes.

Rhys walked in and looked at the sight in front of him. He made a concerted effort to appear as if he was unperturbed by the sight of the paparazzi – beaten and bloody, tied to a chair. He made himself stand tall and pull a straight face. He knew that he was in trouble and he was more excited for a punishment than he – maybe – should have been. “You wanted to see me, Jack?” He asked, with a bit of attitude on the edge of his tone. He couldn’t help it. The words, “So do you finally have enough time for me now?” lay on the tip of his tongue, unspoken but clear in the tension that sat between them.

Jack snorted and mumbled, “Spoiled little brat.” underneath his breath before he addressed Rhys. “Get over here. I’m not gonna ask you again.” He said in a harsh tone – one that old Rhys that he was in trouble and it would only get worse if he didn’t take his punishment with a smile. He beckoned the younger man forward his hand.

Rhys walked over to him, only slightly nervous about what was gonna happen to him – he was still a little drunk and still feeling petty and bitter towards Jack. He had wanted to punish the older man for neglecting him and it seemed that all he managed to accomplish was getting himself punished. Oh well, Rhys thought, it wasn’t like he had to go and make it easy on Jack.

Jack didn’t say a word – just gave Rhys a vaguely threatening and unimpressed look as Rhys made his way over to stand in front of him. Jack put his hands on Rhys’ shoulders, a gesture that was falsely comforting and gentle. “You wanna know what I did this morning?” He asked. Rhys just glared at him – giving him the silent treatment like he always did whenever Jack upset him. That was fine, seeing as Jack wasn’t expecting an answer anyways. “I had to spend all fucking morning cleaning up your mess.” Then he gestured towards the dead man, “Next time you’re pissed at me, try not to tell the whole fucking galaxy about it.”

Rhys didn’t look impressed with his scare tactics, he understood that – at least when it came to him – Jack was more bark than he was bite. He figured that that was just one of the perks of having the most hated man in the galaxy in love with him – no matter what, no serious harm would ever come to him. At least not from Jack’s hands. “You got anything to say for yourself, princess?” Jack asked him in a mockingly sweet tone of voice.

Rhys huffed softly, before he smiled in a coquettish sort of way. “Did you like the photos I sent you last night?” He asked, sarcasm heavy in his tone. Jack laughed a bit at that, mostly to himself, before he grabbed Rhys by the collar and tore his shirt open – the buttons popping as he did so. Rhys cried out in indignant scorn and outrage, “Hey, that was my favorite shirt!” But Jack wasn’t listening, he was too in the moment, too angry with him. Jack pulled Rhys’ shirt off of his shoulders and bunched it behind his back. Then he grabbed Rhys’ too long tie and used it to tie his arms behind his back.

Rhys let out another indignant noise, but didn’t bother to struggle in the binds – although, he was sure that if he wanted to he could probably get out of them – and within moments, Jack turned him around again and pulled his pants down. It was a miracle that they didn’t tear apart just like his top. His pants pooled at his ankle, nearly tripped him over as Jack dragged him along to his chair.

Jack sat himself down and manhandled Rhys so that he was laying face down in his lap. His hand cracked down across Rhys’ ass hard enough to leave red hand print shaped marks against the doughy flesh. It hurt in a way that made Rhys squirm and whine for more. Jack hit him a few more times before he said anything

After a while, Rhys started becoming desensitized to the painful feeling and he started to enjoy it. He had always been a little bit of a masochist, once he was warmed up and Jack knew that. Still, once he started giggling at the rough treatment that he was receiving, he couldn’t stop. He didn’t even know why he started giggling in the first place. Jack’s fingers dug through his hair and pulled Rhys up so that he was forced to face him, “You think this is funny, Rhysie?” He asked in a dangerous tone. “This all just a joke to you?”

Rhys couldn’t stop giggling, “I mean a little.” He admitted. “Ju-just a little bit.” He added in between breathless, nearly drunk laughter. Jack pulled Rhys off of his lap and bent Rhys over his desk. Rhys let out a few sad whimpers at the loss of skin on skin contact. His face was pushed down against the desk, hard enough to leave raw and red marks against his face.

He heard Jack pulling off his belt, and instinctively snapped his legs shut tight. He bit down on his lower lip and tried to stifle out any more noises. Jack’s hand caressed Rhys’ already flushed bottom before he looped his belt up into a makeshift whip. Rhys could hear the air whipping around as Jack flicked it with his wrist to get himself ready. Rhys let out a broken cry as the leather cracked down across his backside.

“You just love to make me go hard on ya, don’t you Rhysie?” Jack asked in a low and dangerous tone of voice. Rhys didn’t reply, he just shuddered with a mixture of fear and arousal roaming through him. The belt cracked down on his ass again, eliciting another whine out of him. “Hey! I asked you a question.” He added, not giving Rhys a break or a chance to breath as he struck him again and again.

Rhys huffed out breathlessly and moaned like a whore, despite the pain he felt. “Yes, yes, daddy I do. I love giving you trouble daddy.” He smiled, “And I’m not sorry ‘bout it.” He smiled, but it was hidden from the older man as he was face down against the furniture, “Sorry, daddy but I’m not sorry.” He added, turning up the brattiness to overdrive. Jack struck Rhys’ ass and the back of his thighs with his belt over and over again, until Rhys was trembling and tears were pouring down his cheeks.

He still wasn’t sorry. Not even a little bit and Jack didn’t even bother asking if he was before he pulled him up by the hair again, forcing him to walk into the middle of his office and pushed him down on his knees in front of Jack. “Open your mouth.” Jack hissed at him. Rhys’ mouth fell open without him even putting in effort and he stuck his tongue out so that it lay flat against his abused lower lip.

He had loved acting rude and bratty, he always did – but he wanted the older mans’ cock in his mouth and down his throat even more than he wanted to keep acting out. Despite the fact that this was a punishment, Jack gave Rhys everything that he wanted. Jack pulled his cock out from the confines of his pants and let the tip of it sit heavily on Rhys’ tongue while he got himself hard.

Jack’s cock was long and thick, it never failed to stuff his mouth full and leave his jaw aching whenever he got a chance to blow him. And he loved that, loved that it hurt just a little bit when Jack forced his cock down Rhys’ throat – it was like a fun little punishment for himself – a funishment, if you will. So, naturally, Jack kept a hand entwined in his hair – holding him back from doing just that.

This was still supposed to be a punishment. Rhys whined as he was continually denied what he wanted. “Daddy, can I-” He asked, in a pathetic and overly submissive tone of voice, “Please?”

“Please, what?” Jack prompted, holding his cock centimeters from Rhys’ lips. He pushed his hips forward just a bit, so that the tip of his dick was just barely brushing past his lips, before he pushed back out of the younger mans’ reach. He did this a few more times to Rhys. It was incredibly frustrating to him, just as Jack intended.

“Lemme suck you, please…” He pleaded in a voice that was rough and quiet – barely loud enough for Jack to hear him. “It’s all I want, daddy… I need it.” He added, even more desperately.

“Keep being polite like this and I’ll consider it, pumpkin. Come on, Rhysie, say please again.” Jack told him, laughing at how desperate Rhys was and how quick the change was. Rhys glared at him weakly and darted his tongue out, “Just give me one more.” He urged in a less than gentle manner.

“Please, please, daddy let me suck your cock.” Rhys begged, “Please, you asshole.” He added in a sharp tone. Jack decided to let him get away with it, for now at least, and allowed him enough free reign to take the older man’s cock in his mouth. He swirled his tongue around the tip briefly, allowing himself to taste him, before he took him in his mouth. He bobbed his head up and down,

He wasn’t allowed the control for much longer than that. Jack grabbed the back of his head again and told him to relax his throat – Rhys did his best to do just that, like he always did – only seconds before he forced Rhys’ head down and pushed his hips forward, so that his cock was practically forced down the younger mans throat. He moaned around the cock in his mouth and closed his eyes as he relaxed his throat, tipping his head back a little so that Jack had an easier time going while he fucked his throat.

Rhys’ hair was a tangled mess and it was getting even worse the older man knotted his fingers in it to hold Rhys’ head firmly in place. Jack thrust in and out of his mouth hard, barely giving Rhys room to breath in between thrusts. The younger man struggled to breath through his nose – every breath that he took felt like it was a reward, the conscious effort that he had to make to keep himself stable was strangely satisfying to him.

This went on for some time – Jack fucking his throat raw, while Rhys whined, moaned and struggled to keep himself afloat. Then Jack pulled out suddenly and Rhys let out a whine of discontent. Jack held Rhys’ head in place, giving him no ability to pull away as he came all over the younger mans’ face. He smiled down at the younger man as Rhys took heaving breaths to calm his heart rate down. He looked up at Jack with big, pleading eyes. “You look so good like that, baby.” He cooed, “Much less bratty.”

Rhys didn’t respond to anything of that, just whimpered quietly. “C’mon.” Jack urged, pulling Rhys to his feet. “We’re going home. I’m not done with you just yet.” He promised, biting at Rhys’ ear as he whispered in the younger mans ear. Rhys was still bound with his arms tied behind his back and half dressed – because Jack had at least been kind enough to pull his pants up, but he didn’t do much else for him – with the older man’s cum dripping down his face. The two of them walked out of his office and into an elevator that was filled with a decent amount of people.

Rhys recognized at least half of them and rounded his shoulders in embarrassment. No one said a damn thing, they pointedly ignored Rhys’ existence – thank god. At least until Jack decided to strike up a conversation with one of the workers that was unfortunate enough to have happened to be standing right by Jack and him, a squirrely looking R&D scientist that Jack insisted on calling Francis. Rhys was almost entirely sure that the guys name wasn’t Francis, but ‘Francis’ didn’t bother to correct Jack – probably because he didn’t want to die at their murderous CEO’s hands.

Jack kept an arm around Rhys, both as a show of ownership and to make him a spectacle. Rhys trained his eyes to the floor, feeling like he was on full display for the entirety of Helios – even if there were only five or six people who saw him like this. “Have you met Rhysie, Francis?” He asked, not waiting for the man to respond when he said, “Of course you have…everybody knows Rhys! He’s everybody’s best friend – doesn’t matter if they’re Hyperion or Maliwan scum.” He turned to Rhys and asked him, in a low voice that sent shivers down the younger mans’ spine, “Isn’t that right, kitten?”

“Yup.” Rhys said quietly, barely audible. He bit down on his lower lip and let their conversation wash over him – the words muddled. He closed his eyes and he intensely felt that everyone’s eyes were on him. It made his skin crawl, in the worst and best sort of way. It was humiliating, in a way that had him trembling and whimpering, while Jack practically ignored his existence in favor of chatting up his subordinates.

Rhys had tears in his eyes by the time that the elevator finally stopped on their floor, and they were on the way back to their penthouse. Jack noticed that he was getting overwhelmed and stopped walking, he gently squeezed Rhys’ shoulder and turned him around so that Jack could look him in the eye while he checked in on his mental state. “Rhys-” He sighed, “look at me, pumpkin.” He scolded and Rhys was quick to obey – his eyes were watery and glassy, “

“I… it’s just so much…” Rhys admitted after a few minutes, his voice was a bit raspy and weak from all the crying, whining and having his throat fucked.

Jack absentmindedly played with Rhys’ already mussed up hair as he spoke, “You wanna dial it back then, baby?” He suggested, as gently as he was capable of.

Rhys shook his head as Jack wiped away his tears. “N-no it’s okay, ‘m okay, I promise. I wanna keep going…” He mumbled out in a voice that was just loud enough for Jack to hear him. “Please.” He added with desperation obvious in his voice. The older man nodded and led him down the hall with one hand squeezing Rhys’ shoulder in a comforting manner and his other squeezing his butt, nudging him onward to take the rest of his punishment.

Once they were back in the penthouse, Jack had demanded that he strip himself down and kneel on the plush and clean carpet. Rhys – having his confidence and bratty attitude restored a little bit by the check in – was only a little difficult about it. He sighed, rolled his eyes and nearly stuck his tongue out at the older man before his knees buckled without his permission and he did exactly as he was asked.

Jack stood back and watched as Rhys got into position and once Rhys was kneeling, naked on his floor Then he made him sit and wait until Jack decided to walk over to him, and grab his chin so that he was forced to look up at Jack. “Have you learned your lesson yet?” He asked in a tone that was genuine and honest. Rhys didn’t respond just yet. Jack followed that up with, “Are you gonna be a good boy now, Rhysie?” His fingers tracing Rhys’ plump bottom lip with thumb in an idle manner.

Rhys pretended to think about it and a coy smile spread across his face. “No, daddy, I don’t think I’ve learned my lesson just yet.” He said, playfully shaking his head from side to side. “And I don’t think I will be, no.” He added, before making an attempt to stifle his giggles, before he steeled himself and said, in a tone that was practically gift wrapped as bait, “Make me.”

It was more than enough to spring Jack into action. He pounced on Rhys, throwing him down on the ground. The action made Rhys breathlessly whine at the powerlessness that he felt right then. Jack’s hands wrapped around his throat, restricting his airflow until Rhys was kicking his legs out and making desperate, fearful little noises. Tears flowed from his eyes freely and he was suddenly all too aware of the older man’s erection against his hip.

Jack loosened up his grip on the younger man’s throat. Rhys took in a few greedy breaths. “Let’s try this one more time…” He purred in a low and sweet sounding voice. “Are you gonna be a good boy for me?” He asked, although he was sure that he already knew what he was going to say.

Rhys hesitated for just a moment before he gave him a mischievous sort of look and then repeated himself, “Make me.” He said, desperation lacing his voice. It sounded, to Jack at least, like he was asking for help instead of what he had said. Jack was happy to help him out. For now, at least.

“Mm-kay… if that’s what you want.” Jack cooed and then pressed rough, biting kisses down his chest and stomach. Rhys squirmed just a little bit, but ultimately didn’t fight him.

“What are you…” Rhys trailed off and let out a moan as Jack stroked his cock gently. “I thought you were gonna-” He was cut off by Jack gently shushing him. His brow furrowed in confusion, but everything that Jack did to him was so soothing and relaxing to him that he didn’t argue.

“Relax, princess…” The older man cooed, voice barely above a whisper. He smiled and pressed his lips against the shaft of Rhys’ plump, hard cock. His tongue darted out, sliding up and down over his shaft. Rhys let out a pleasant sigh, he hadn’t been expecting this, and spread his legs a little. Jack sucked him off with incredible gentleness. He pressed feather light kisses all over the base and shaft of his cock and stroked him low and slow. Even still, it didn’t take long to wind Rhys up.

“Daddy, I’m…” Rhys whined in a high, breathy voice as he bucked his hips and squirmed around as much as the older man allowed him to. “Oh fuck, oh god, please… please, please, please.”

The older man chuckled, the vibrations of his throat nearly tipping Rhys over the edge. “You gonna cum for me, baby?” Jack hummed as the younger man squirmed and bucked into his hands and lips.

“Yeah,” Rhys replied, breathlessly. “Yeah I think I’m gonna- fuck, Ja- I mean…can I, please?” He practically begged, hoping to be as polite and sweet as possible, just so he could get everything that he wanted from the older man. “Daddy, please?”

Then Jack stopped, seconds before Rhys would have cum. “Mm, nah.” He said. Rhys opened his mouth to curse at him, but it turned into a whine as Jack pinched and pulled at Rhys’ cock and balls, scratching painfully over his shaft. Rhys cried out in misery as his erection diminished and the heat in his gut felt like it was curdling, turning his stomach.

“Daddy, you’re so mean…” He whined as Jack pushed him down the ground with a rough, bruising grip.

“Shut up. You love it when I’m mean.” The older man replied, cruelly gleeful at his partner’s expense. He gave Rhys one more kiss before he pulled out a small, clear cock cage with a bright gold lock at the base of it. Rhys’ eyes widened just a bit and he trembled nervously as he realized that he probably wasn’t gonna cum tonight. Bummer, he thought, but maybe he deserved that much.

Jack hesitated for just a moment – giving him a short window to use his safe word. Rhys took a breath and nodded at him, as if to say, “It’s okay, keep going.” without saying so much as a word. He secured it on him within seconds. Then Jack pulled him to his feet.

The two of them walked over to a portion of the room, in front of one of the windows. There was a hook that was attached to the ceiling above them. Rhys looked at it with interest, but didn’t say anything. “You gonna be a good boy now?” Jack asked, staring Rhys down hard.

Rhys looked down at his currently useless cock and pretended to be upset. “I guess I have to now, don’t I?” He practically fluttered his eyelashes at Jack, flirtatiously. “If I want to get this off of me… I have to be good.” He even had the audacity to pout and look at Jack with pleading eyes.

“That’s riiiiight.” Jack flicked his nose condescendingly and then, tapped idly at the younger mans’ locked up dick in a cruel gesture of having power over the usually so defiant younger man. “You’re helpless, baby. You gotta do whatever I want, if you ever want to come again.” Just like Rhys wanted to be, was left unsaid.“Now, gimme your hands.” Rhys did as he was told and Jack pressed them together, holding them in place as he tied them together tightly in front of his chest with a thick, brightly colored length of rope. Jack attached his wrist to the ceiling hook.

“What are you gonna do to me now?” Rhys asked, only a little fearful.

“What-ev-er I want.” Jack reminded him in a cheeky tone of vocie. Rhys felt his knees get weak, like they were made of jelly, and he nodded weakly. A thick blindfold was slipped over his eyes and he suddenly felt completely helpless. Jack pet his thigh in a soothing manner for just a moment and he relaxed, trusting the older man to be good to him.

Jack stopped petting him after a moment, He let out a gasp of surprise as the hook ascended towards the ceiling, stretching his limbs out far more than was comfortable. Even with as tall as Rhys was, he could barely stand on his tiptoes. He couldn’t move much, he couldn’t see anything. Everything felt so much more intense like this. He heard a bottle open, and in moments he felt something cool drip between his ass cheeks and a bit down the back of his thighs.

He let out a soft gasp at the sensation and unconsciously recoiled from it. The gasp quickly turned into a whine as he felt Jack’s thick fingers nudge against his entrance, stroking the rim of the younger mans’ hole until he relaxed and let him in. He subjected Rhys to an incredibly brisk, somewhat rough fingering. It didn’t take long for Rhys to start deriving pleasure from it, and he was rocking back on his partner’s fingers in no time. Jack used both hands to slap down on each of his cheeks, spanking him until his ass was cherry red and tears were falling down Rhys’ face.

Jack grabbed him and pushed him down, so that he was forced to arch his back, before he slowly forced his cock in Rhys’ well stretched hole. He didn’t give him much time to adjust at all, and fucked Rhys with little care. “Ah, you feel so big. Too big…s-so good.” Rhys whined, squirming as Jack thrust in and out of him, digging his nails into Rhys’ hips – hard enough to bruise as he fucked him. He felt like a sex toy, in the best sort of way. In that moment, it was like he was just some pretty doll that hung from the ceiling and his only purpose was for Jack to come in and stuff him with his cock.

Jack responded by slapping his ass, “Keep your mouth shut or I’ll leave you here all night.” He snapped in a low, nearly animalistic growl. Rhys let his head fall forward, his chin pressed against his chest as Jack took everything that he wanted from him.

Rhys let out a whine and bit down on his lower lip to stifle any more noises or words that might come out of him. He set his jaw tight and only allowed a few soft whimpers to escape from his lips, while Jack thrust in and out of him, pistoning his hips against Rhys’ hard and fast. It was overwhelming, he hit his prostate almost constantly and every time that Rhys’ cock started to stiffen, it would be crushed down by the cage around his cock – which hurt. A lot.

It felt like he was being used – in suspended animation – for years and years, constantly. Then Jack came inside of him, flooding his insides with his cum. He pulled out after a moment and slapped his thigh. Jack watched with interest as his cum dripped out of the younger mans’ hole. Rhys looked filthy and he told him as much. “Aw, kitten! You look so cute when you’re not mouthing off.”

Rhys whimpered and squeezed his thighs together tight. He was trembling and shaking – overwhelmed and exhausted by everything that they had done together. He wanted nothing more than for Jack to hold him and tell him that he did well, that everything was going to be okay. “Daaaaddy…I need you.” Rhys whined out in a sleepy sounding mumble. Rhys let out a soft sob, worried – in the strange head space that he was in – that he had done something wrong and Jack would leave him here alone all night like he had threatened. “D-daddy please.” He hiccuped, shaking like a leaf.

Jack circled him, checking for any damage beyond superficial marks and bruises. Once he was sure that he was completely fine, he undid all of the restraints that he was tied in, unlocked the cock cage and then picked the younger man up. He scooped him into his arms and held him securely. Rhys whimpered and mumbled soft, fearful statements while Jack shushed him.

Jack pressed kisses to his hair while the younger man reached out to him for comfort and security, like he was the only person in the universe who could make him feel safe. Jack gladly offered that security to him with open arms and kind words. Rhys hung onto Jack like he was a koala bear, it made Jack smile. He got so damn clingy after a scene or a punishment. “I know, baby, I know…” Jack crooned in his ear, soothing down Rhys’ sweat slick hair. He carried Rhys to their bathroom and sat him down in the large tub. “Just, relax, sweetheart and let daddy take care of you.”

Rhys’ head lolled to the side in a sleepy manner as comfortably warm water filled the tub. Jack filled it up with bubble bath and a bath bomb, so that it was extra soothing to the younger man. “I’ll be right back in a minute.” He said, tweaking his nose playfully. Rhys just nodded dumbly, too fucked out to do much more than enjoy the comforting feeling of the warm water lapping around his sore body.

Jack came back with a bottle of cold water with a straw poking out through the top of it. He sat it down on the edge before he stripped himself entirely naked and got in the tub with him. Rhys crawled forward on his hands and knees and curled himself up in the older man’s arms. He sipped the water quietly, as Jack pet him and tell him what a good boy he was and how well he had taken his punishments. Rhys drank in the praise greedily, holding onto Jack and mumbling sweetly spoken affirmations back to the older man. The two of them took to gently washing each other – smiling, laughing and kissing each other the whole time.

Once they were sufficiently clean and relaxed, Jack pulled the two of them out of the bath. Gently maneuvering Rhys to his feet so that the younger man could towel himself off. Neither of them bothered to dress themselves again – why would they? – before they slowly walked back to their bedroom. They laid down, ready for sleep, cuddled up close against each other.

“You’re a good boy, Rhysie.” Jack told him one more time, “Even if you’re too much of a brat most of the time.” He added in a teasing manner.

Rhys gave him a pleased, dopey sort of grin. “You’re a good boy too…” He replied, in a tone that seemed strangely genuine. Jack couldn’t help but laugh at that – if only because it was something that Rhys would have said at any other time to get a rise out of him.

“Yeah?” Jack challenged, raising a brow at the younger man curled up against his side. He wrapped an arm around him and he arched closer to him.

“Yeah.” Rhys affirmed and then nuzzled against Jack’s chest in a fashion that was not unlike a kitten gentle headbutting against someone for affection. Jack smiled, he thought that it was cute when Rhys got like this. He could be so endearing when he wasn’t trying to get a rise out of the older man but he could be just as endearing when he was trying to get a rise out of him too. “You’re so good to me.” He frowned as he suddenly recalled what started all of this. “’M sorry, for t-talking to that guy at the club.” He mumbled, tired enough to let himself be honest with Jack. “I didn’t mean to put you… er, or Hyperion in danger.” He admitted. “I was just… I was so lonely! I missed you so much-”

Jack cut him off with a few possessive kisses. “No harm done baby,” He said, “This time. Just, ah, don’t do it again. Alright?” Rhys didn’t respond, as by the time that he finished speaking he had passed out in his arms. Jack scoffed and gently disentangled their limbs. He gave Rhys a kiss on the top of his head and wrapped him up in the soft, warm blankets before he walked off to make some arrangements.

They were no strangers to Rhys acting out – usually in little, inconsequential ways so that he could get a punishment. Rhys liked the pain and the humiliations, Jack liked doling it out to him and putting him in his place. Their dynamic worked specifically because they were uniquely suited to each other – it was a symbiotic relationship that they had.

But he felt – and Rhys felt, if his angry misbehavior was any tell – that he had been neglecting him as of late. It wasn’t entirely his fault, running Hyperion kept him busy as hell, but it was obvious that it had taken a toll on the younger man. Rhys was always desperate for his attention and getting less of it had kept him on edge. So, he decided to set that right as soon as possible.

He called up Timothy first and told him that he was in luck – he would have the extra comfy gig of sitting in his office, pretending to be him on Helios, if only because he was the doppelganger that he trusted the most. Even if Timothy proclaimed to hate him, he was understandably loyal to the man that he shared a face with. He’d had to pull the comm of his ear when Timothy started excitedly exclaiming his glee about that. Then he called up Blake – demanding that the VP make arrangements for a short stay at one of his vacation homes – the one that was on Promethea. He was sure that Rhys would love staying there, it was serene and quiet, but close enough to the city that they could have a good time whenever they wanted to brave the paparazzi.

Looking at how laid up Rhys was, he was sure that by the time that he woke up again – they would be on their way there. He was sure that he would be in for a hell of a surprise when he finally woke. But He was also sure that the younger man would be delighted with everything that he had planned for him – even if he pouted and rolled his eyes, protesting too much to the contrary. He couldn’t wait to give his kitten the best attitude adjustment of his life.

[sweetinsecruity]

highschool au- the school’s biggest will-they-won’t-they heejin and hyunjin finally get together. it’s all soft touches and loving kisses but heejin has a problem. all the girls who liked hyunjin before (and there are a lot of them) keep bothering her. when hyunjin finally finds about about this she stands in top of a table on the lunchroom and threatens anyone who touches her heekki -🌸

Heejin and Hyunjin walked side by side in comfortable silence. Hyunjin had just finished up her basketball practice for the day so they two were pretty tired.

 As they walked, the wind began to pick up making Heejin shiver slightly. Heejin had always been a little sensitive to the cold but she always managed to forget to bring a jacket during the winter. Hyunjin noticed the smaller girls shiver “ Do you want to borrow my jacket Heekie? I’m not cold.” Heejin shook her head “ No, no I’m fine don’t worry.” She said with a smile.

“ Heejin I know you get cold easily, just take the jacket,” Hyunjin said trying to hang her hoodie on Heejin’s shoulders. “ I do NOT get cold easily,” Heejin said in defense. 

“ You totally do, and its because you have no meant on your bones, so all you have to keep you warm is me!” Hyunjin said pointing at herself dramatically. Heejin rolled her eyes at that.Finally, Hyunjin managed to get the jacket on Heejin who only let out a small huff in objection. 

Heejin had considered giving the jacket back and saying something about how Hyunjin would be cold now, but as much a Heejin hated to admit she loved the large jackets warmth, and the comforting scent of Hyunjin that came with it. Heejin looked towards the ground picking her her pace to try to escape the blush creeping onto her cheeks. 

Hyunjin chuckled to herself at the smaller girl’s antics, easily catching up to her and wrapping her arms around Heejin’s small waist. Only to lift the latter up and swing her around in circles. “ LET ME DOWN NOW HYUNJIN!!!” Heejin screamed, trying her best to free herself. Eventually, the taller girl set Heejin down and was met with a flurry and light slaps to her arm “ Okay okay I’m sorry, jeez “ Hyunjin said laughing.

“ IT’S NOT FUNNY!” Heejin exclaimed still upset with the taller girl. “ Alright fine, I am very sorry Heekie,” Hyunjin said trying her best to be serious. Heejin gave a curt nod “ Good. You are forgiven.” Hyunjin laughed once again as the two continued their walking.“Hey, do you wanna come over today? I’m kinda bored and maybe we could like, read or something.” Hyunjin asked, her confidence wavering towards the end. 

“ Yeah sure. I don’t have anything going on today anyways.” Heejin replied trying her best to sound as nonchalant as possible. “ Cool “ Hyunjin replied in that same tone.The two eventually found themselves laying next to each other quietly reading. Heejin, who was lying on her back, peaked over at Hyunjin trying to figure out how to get revenge for being swung around earlier.

 The taller girl was popped up on her elbow’s and was seemingly engrossed in some sort of poetry book. Heejin sat up a bit and quickly pecked Hyunjin’s cheek thinking that, that would elicit a response.Nothing. Hyunjin didn’t even blink. Heejin leaned back in again planting another peck on the taller girl’s cheek. Once again nothing. Heejin whined cutely hitting Hyunjin’s shoulder and stealing her book.“ Hey! “ Hyunjin yelled after having her book snatched away. The two girls ended up wrestling, with Heejin trying her best to keep the book away from Hyunjin. 

Eventually, though, Hyunjin pinned Heejin to her bad and took her book back. She quickly set it aside thought and began to tickle Heejin mercilessly. With tears forming in her eyes the smaller girl begged Hyunjin to stop.

 So after a few more minutes of toucher Hyunjin relented allowing Heejin to breathe.The taller girl leaned down and brushed a few strands of hair out of Heejin’s face, tucking them gently behind her ear. When she realized what she was doing Hyunjin pulled back only to see Heejin looking to the side furiously blushing.  

“ Heekie~~ “ Hyunjin called in a sing-songy voice “ Can you look at me, please?” She said softly. 

Gently taking Heejin’s chin and turning her head to face her own. The tension between the two was almost tangible as they stared at one another. Hyunjin eventually, after what seemed like forever, leaned in closing her eyes and capturing Heejin’s lips in her own.

Heejin’e eye’s nearly popped out of her skull before they fluttered closed and she melted into Hyunjin’s soft lips. The kiss was slow and soft, and when they broke it Hyunjin tenderly leaned her forehead against Heejin’s. 

“ Question,” Hyunjin said in a breathy voice

“ Answer. “ Heejin responded in a slightly lower voice than usual

“ Would you maybe want to go out with me?” Hyunjin asked nervously, breaking their eye contact. Her eyes snapped back to Heejin’s when she felt someone flick her forehead.

“ Of course I’ll go out with you, gosh you’re an idiot huh?” Heejin said laughing. Hyunjin jumped up and did a little victory dance, while Heejin laughed at her dork of a girlfriend. Hyunjin rushed back over to Heejin squeezing her tightly and peppering her face with kisses.

 The two decided to watch a movie after which inevitably lead to Heejin falling asleep on Hyunjin, who had to call Heejin’s mom to let her know that Heejin would be staying over that night. Hyunjin leaned down and kissed Heejin tenderly on the forehead

“ Goodnight Heekie.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Next Day

Heejin waited next to the basketball courts for her girlfriend to finish up with practice. The wasn’t anything new for Heejin since she would always wait for Hyunjin to be done so they could walk home together.

 Heejin noticed Hyunjin leaving the locker rooms and heading over to her, which put a smile on Heejin’s face.Until Hyunjin was called over by another teammate of her who was being a little more touchy than Heejin would’ve liked. 

That entire day Heejin had begun to notice that a bunch of other girls seemed to have a thing for HER girlfriend. Before she could think much more about it Hyunjin came running up to her

“ Hey! Ready to go Heekie?” Hyunjin said with a huge smile. Heejin nodded and grabbed her things to go.Their walk home consisted mainly of conversation about how all of their friends had reacted when they announced that the two of them were dating. In short most of the reactions where close to that of ‘ Finally! Oh my gosh, we all knew it.’

The couple eventually had to split up and go their own houses but not before sharing a short sweet goodnight kiss.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Next Day

Heejin walked down the hallways linked with Hyunjin trying her best to ward off any of the people she knew where interested in Hyunjin. The bell for  first period rang separating the two girls until lunch which Heejin certainly did not enjoy the thought of.

When the long-awaited lunch bell finally rang Heejin almost sprinted to Hyunjin’s locker, while she mentally scolded herself for being so overprotective. 

When she got there a girl was leaning on Hyunjin’s locker talking to her, with her hand on Hyunjin’s forearm. Heejin quickly walked over and said hi extremely passively-aggressively towards the girl, who seemed to have gotten the message and left.“ I don’t like that girl,” Heejin said annoyed. Hyunjin gave her girlfriend a kiss on the cheek immediately calming her down. “ I know, I don’t like her either. “

 Hyunjin said quietly.The couple walked hand in hand to the cafeteria sitting down with their friends and casually chatting about classes and drama. While they were talking another girl started walked over to Hyunjin. “ Hyunjinnie!! How are you!” The girl exclaimed, hugging Hyunjin tightly and giving a small kiss on the cheek.

 If Heejin was annoyed before, she was ready to commit murder now.

“ ALRIGHT! That enough!” Heejin said firmly, standing up and carefully climbing up onto their lunch table. “ OK, EVERYONE! LISTEN UP! KIM HYUNJIN IF MY GIRLFRIEND, GOT THAT MY GIRLFRIEND. SO KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOUrSELF” Heejin announced to the whole school before sitting back down happily next to Hyunjin.

 Who then pulled the smaller girl into her lad wrapping her arms around her waist and gently peppering kisses along her neck.Heejin giggled at the action “ Alright, alright I get I was a bit crazy but the kisses tickle stop ~~” Heejin whined cutely.“

You’re amazing you know that Heekie?” Hyunjin said softly into Heejin’s ear

“ Yeah, I know.” Heejin relied confidently turning and giving Hyunjin a quick kiss.

OMG i am soooooo sorry this took so long 🌸 anon. I had a draft finished but my computer deleted it so i had to re-write it ):   Anyways I hope you all enjoy this 💜

[incorrecteragonquotes]

Eragon Movie Recap Part 1: The First Part

So.

I watched the Eragon movie. Voluntarily.

I would say that I had forgotten how bad this movie was, but the truth is, I don’t think I ever fully understood in the first place. I saw this thing in theatres back when I had very low standards, and I kinda disliked it then. Seeing it again more than ten years later, it blew my mind. Ohhh boy, was I ever unprepared. I knew it would be bad, but this? I completely underestimated it. I was not at all ready.

But, ready or not, I saw the film. All of it. In detail. And among all of the bad bits I found many things to laugh at, though I imagine most of those were unintentional, and at least one instance of thematic consistency, which is always nice to see. So, the film was bad, certainly, but not thoroughly, completely terrible. But, if what we have now is bad, can we do better? Can we take what the studio has given us and transform it into something fun to experience, something people might actually choose to look at because they like seeing it? I certainly hope so, as this is the beginning of my quest to make that a reality.

This post and those following it will constitute a recap of the 2006 Eragon film - a summary of its events with a bit of commentary sprinkled in. Personal opinions will probably sprout up faster than weeds in a suburb. The wordy bits will be broken up by annotated screencaps from the film itself. I hope you like them! This series is based on a recap/screencap format that I personally have seen in mammothrider’s RWBY Recaps. In this recap series, you’ll be able to see elements from both that and screencap annotation blogs like cakewatchespsychopass. These folks do some very good work, and if their stuff looks interesting to you, you should totally check it out!

Now that you know what’s coming, I invite you to join me on my journey, as it is now beginning. My mission: to give you a way to enjoy the Eragon movie without first having to endure the Eragon movie.

Our story opens with a series of aerial shots. Clouds, mountains, and more are visible as the opening narration makes it clear that we’re in for a few minutes of exposition. Eventually, while looking at some clouds, a dragon raises its head into the frame. It turns out that we, the audience, were the real dragon rider the whole time! I must wonder, though, where the dragon was keeping its head earlier in this shot. That must have made for one uncomfortable flying stance.

But what’s this? On the other side of this cloud, we find a battle! With dragons fighting left and right and fire flying every which way, we look up to find ourselves attacked from above by another dragon!

The narrator informs us that all of this fighting is because of some guy named Galbatorix. While we’re on the subject of this guy, I have to ask, who names their kid Galbatorix? Like, even ignoring the part where it’s clearly an Evil Overlord Name, am I the only one who thinks it’s weird that somewhere, somebody looked at their kid and thought, I’m going to give you a really unwieldy name containing entirely too many syllables and weird consonants. I don’t mean to suggest that people never have long or complicated names, but compared to the rest of the names in this story, this one really sticks out to me as a very egregious example.

Moving on, we’re told about how there was this big war where a bunch of people died, and those that didn’t opted instead to run away in the approximate direction of some mountains. But wait! Who is this?

Some important rebels are riding through the woods on horseback, and they… stole the king’s favourite rock. We aren’t told why this matters. We are told, however, that the most important rebel’s name is Arya. Interestingly, she appears to be wearing the least armour, despite being the most important. Maybe they’re hoping that people will recognize her, and therefore not attack? That’s an unusual strategy. Regardless, everyone’s favourite oversized paperweight is clearly causing a few problems.

Meanwhile at the local evil lair, Ol’ Galby’s telling his Shade friend Durza all about how much he misses his cool rock. Oh, if only there were someone who could go on a low-profile retrieval mission. Someone with vaguely-defined supernatural abilities. Someone who doesn’t have the responsibility of staying in this weird mountain cave in case they need to loom dramatically in front of the camera. Durza, one of the least bad characters in this movie, takes the hint.

And now, we get to meet our protagonist! He’s getting out of bed at nighttime, for some reason. Protagonist walks past his sleeping uncle on his way to the door, and, for some reason, takes the time to pause and smile fondly at him. I’m not really sure of what the filmmakers were trying to communicate with this. He cares about his family? This man is, in fact, related to him? He would be disappointed if his parental figure were to suddenly be murdered? It is indeed that time of day, you know, the one when people generally aren’t awake? I should hope these things are all understandable by other means.

As our narrator informs us that this man venturing into the woods with a bow and some arrows is, in fact, going hunting, we get to enjoy a confusing bit of editing. In one shot, Protagonist Man (the fact that his name is Eragon is, of course, left unsaid) is closing the front door behind him. In the next shot, he’s climbing a hill in the middle of a lush forest that was clearly not at his doorstep in the establishing shot. Yes, I know he could have walked there first, but the editing strongly suggested he didn’t have to.

Moving on, Durza’s lurking in the forest now, waiting to intercept some horses and their humanoid companions. He stands in the middle of some pathway, raises his hand all magic-like and starts… hissing? The Urgals are apparently on their game today as they know how to interpret vague hissing as “launch ambush plan 4.2”.

It’s ambush time! Arya’s two dude friends get pincushioned real fast, and Arya herself gets tackled off her horse. Oh, no! If only there had been some obvious sign of trouble, like a suspicious dude acting suspiciously in the middle of the road dead ahead.

Eragon’s walking in the woods. There’s no-one around and his phone is dead. Out of the corner of his eye, he spots it: a deer.

Meanwhile, Arya is scooting along in the forest, holding a sword. That’s probably not how you hold a sword. Man, elven emissary training just isn’t what it used to be. Though, I do wonder how she made her tackler vanish before they hit the ground. We will probably never know. Then again, maybe that’s what they covered during training in place of proper sword-carrying technique.

I digress. Suddenly, it’s the Ring of Fire! Durza’s casting it, and really doesn’t seem to worry about fire damage while walking through it. He tries to intimidate Arya by finishing his sentence even after pausing to let her quip, but she’s one step ahead of him. She retrieves a very special cool rock, and immediately beams it out of her jurisdiction. Foiled again, Durza!

Time for Eragon to shoot the deer. But wait! The deer got all glowy and exploded! Actually, no, it didn’t explode, but it did get very mildly spooked and will be grazing elsewhere. Eragon doesn’t know what’s going on. His arrow’s on fire. There’s a cool rock on the ground. It’s smoking. Eragon looks perplexed, more than anything, by this complete surprise. I understand that intense confusion is something anyone would be feeling in this situation, but I would think that Eragon might have more pressing concerns when faced with a flashy mystery projectile.

Durza walks over to Arya, who’s collapsed onto the ground. It turns out that InstaPost is an expensive service. They discuss the exact meaning of “out of her jurisdiction”.

Eragon has decided to walk over to the cool rock. He squats down next to it. Picks it up. Blows on it. Truly an exhaustive investigation. Unsurprisingly, he doesn’t do any sort of check beforehand to make sure that the suspiciously shiny explosively teleporting object isn’t going to curse him on contact. Oh, Eragon. What are we going to do with you?

Arya, meanwhile, has some sixth sense that lets her know that her cool rock has been found by an idiot. Satisfied, she takes a nap, leaving Durza to pick up the pieces.

This brings our first installment in the Eragon Movie Recap series to a close! This part covered about 6 minutes of screentime. Thanks for reading, and I hope you had fun, as I most certainly had fun writing it. If there was something you particularly liked, or would like to see done differently in future installments, you are more than welcome to leave some feedback as a reply, or in the ask box, or however else you’d like to deliver your message. I look forward to hearing from you!

Remember to tune in next week when we visit such questions as “will Eragon achieve his dream of multiclassing?”, “just how much trouble is Arya in?”, and “will the audience ever see Eragon follow proper safety procedures?”. See you then!

Bonus:

[themilokin]

14, 17, 29, 30, 31

14. Introduce any other parties you have played in or DM-ed.

Oh god. Oh no. The LONGEST LIST…

The Historical Preservation Society of Fandolin - My first ever dnd party playing Lost Mines of Phandelver! This was a bunch of years ago and I still have very very fond memories. We got our name by a scheme that managed to get us a 1v1 fight with a necromancer and then later an invitation to see some bugbears but that turned out less good. Comprised of Flint the Dwarven Cleric who 100% started a table-wide superstition of warhammers never hitting their targets, Taris the Half-Orc Paladin noble who originated the scheme, Tilwynn Syrr (Mr. Sir)- my wood elf rogue- who continued the scheme and butted heads with Taris repeatedly, and Eileer- a wood-elf beastmaster ranger who we called Grandma for her age and general personality. It was a wild few months.

Ghostbusters - A hard-scrabble group of idiots fight off supernatural threats and actual cannibal Shia LeBouff in the Magic The Gathering setting of Innestrad. The first campaign my girlfriend and I got to play together, and her first campaign! Comprised of her Ness (a Hunter Ranger with RIDICULOUS damage output), my Vermillion Kade (assassin and group dad), a Fighter that died to a Shambling Mound and came back as a Bagpiping Bard whose names elude me, Nessnemo (Nemo for clarity- a barbarian whose outfit consisted of primarily straps and little else), and Anders (A druid who caused the tablewide joke of ‘Bear in a Banquethall’ whenever players do something Very Ill-Advised because they missed a detail of description). We also saw a character named Chrodechild in this game while I took over for a Birthday Two-shot DMing stint.

OG Sendra - The first attempt at a full-length campaign. Comprised of Chrodechild the enchantress that eventually face-heel-turned into a villain, Lorelai Elffei the thief from a town of children who died and came back, Nemo (once more, but tiefling this time), Eseka the Halfling Monk/Bard performer in a circus (I THINK to melil, actually) who died and was restored, and Feverfew- the Drow Warlock of the Archfey.It had a pretty high character-swap-and-death rate. Feverfew the warlock died and became Patrin the Dragonborn Paladin who was then ALSO killed, and Kanseif the Human Barbarian Warrior Princess came about to replace him. Chrodechild turned evil and was replaced with Rhadha the crippled tiefling warlock who had made a deal with hags and had a long contract full of stipulations. Brill had to depart after character moments occurred and came back as Sylvienne Ghost- an Aasimar druid and Therapy Dog. There were further character swaps later on, but by the time they occurred the campaign had begun to grind to a halt.

Shards of the Past - A campaign run by a friend. The party was gathering the broken fragments of a rod of Manticores to fight back against the northern Empire. We were contracted by the queen to do so and BOY we sucked at it but we sure did win the war! A human paladin (whose name escapes me) with a lion-steed named Balthazar, Kestral the human Ranger-assassin (who had bird-themed names for her whole family it was rad), and my gnome Wizard Sullivan Orren du Ghislain-Ameritte III, who slowly descended towards lawful evil as the game progressed. It was a WILD romp. 

ThreaTTT - My second stab at DMing! The players awoke in prison after a night of wildly out-of-hand carousing and had to pay off their debt to society in service to Drann’s public. Mostly monster hunting and character-driven, the first introduction of The Timeless and Sliver of Moon! Party consisted of Tor (half-elf half-dwarf bard who was locked in an endless one-sided rivalry with Fortesque D’artigan- another half-elven bard), Risc Taxis (an assassin from the Talons, the southern Thieves and Assassin’s guild in Sendra, and an addict to Celadon- a opiate that stains fingers blue), and Atonement/Toni- an Aasimar Archfey warlock who was fleeing an engagement and was beholden to the whims of her 12 year old patron. They more or less made a thrash metal band by level 5, and Cera- a merfolk enchantress prostitute- joined up with them after a trip to the Stormlashed Sea. Her name didn’t fit the scheme, but she was loads of fun.

Pile of Idiots/Fortune’s Favor/Dumb Luck - You know this one, Muffin. ;P Comprised of a Fireball-Happy Endlessly-Curious sorcerer, an Extra As Shit 4 Elements Monk, the Queen of the Sea herself, The Worlds Best Bard, Smol Druid with Smol Doggo frond, and Beefest Lizard Tank, these idiots try and save the world- or at least get by.

Trees Beneath the Seas - A campaign that got very away from us, and where Moon received most of his character development. It was a huge party, which I think detracted a bit from the potential RP fun, but I got to be RECKLESS. We had Damon Pyre the Half-Elf-Half-Dragon Sorcerer, Durieal Durnam the OP monk that was killed by the weapon he carried, Saneva Amailo the hexblade warlock of Garagos and certified Edgelord Supreme, Quv the gnome-turned-elf rogue that left and whose player came back with Rue the Pumpkin Queen the human druid, Amaya Arissius the wood-elf Horizon Walker Ranger (who died and was reincarnated as a human), Verath the Dragonborn bard, Persephone O’Dougal the Canim forge cleric, Braugen Rowcron the dwarf barbarian who came back later as Satsuss the yuan-ti artificer, Arlow Rathers the paladin of Illmater and best baker the world has ever seen, Waruk Flamesong the half-orc wizard/cleric who sank the world, and finally Sliver of Moon who robbed, lied, and smooth-talked his way into and out of worlds of trouble as a swashbuckling rogue-fighter-paladin-sorcerer (we got to lvl 30 shit got WEIRD).

Harder Than We Thought - Thrush’s game! We played on the continent of Sivaan- slowly coming under siege by a power called The Parody that wanted to make the whole world just a liiiiiiiittle more interesting. Evelynn Mercado (Parsippany Olapieros) the half-elf blade-bard with ten tons of swagger in a ten ounce body who was looking for her father and making her own name in the world, Thrush Marigold the endlessly sunny sun-soul monk who was learning about his tiefling heritage while looking for his mother, Sir Tim the Halfling Hero For Hire Paladin who was making his tiefling lover and his son proud, Dune the bloodhunter with a Big Problem with hags, ‘The’ Wothe the more traditional halfling bard who was potentially about to be Thrush’s uncle by marriage, Perryn the Air Genasi Beastmaster Ranger and prankmaster general, and a dragonborn sorcerer I cannot recall the name of with terrible eyesight.

Punk! - A portal-fantasy run by our Innestrad DM, with a fantastic set up where he said he had to take a call during our session 0 and walked out. We then all got messages at the table saying he’d been replaced and to not trust him, and when he came back his whole body language was changed and then ‘sucked us into a portal’ via his tome of handbooks he got rebound into one HUGE book. We all played ourselves but better, and it was wild.

Umber Wilds/Aspiring Cryptids - One I’m currently running on mondays! A group of adventurers Doing Their Best. Audhilde Stoneforger is the Eldritch Knight and Battle Goddess who can leap up to 170 feet because I’ve broken my own will. Larken Delmare is the human shadow sorcerer who used to be an elf and came back wrong, she’s got ties to the first lands of Thielle and is dealing with Coming Back Wrong as best she can. Yseult Brighton is a water-genasi grave cleric with both Selune and Shar claiming portions of her soul, she’s been dubbed the World’s Okayest Cleric and is basically a fishbowl made of friendship. Lastly there’s Ekaterina Sheralova, a drow Gloomstaker Ranger with the most flamboyant fashion and cat-like personality whose family is probably going to wind up killing her or trying to.

17. What are some house rules that your group has?

BIG CRITS! You max your primary damage die and then roll the second, so you’re always hitting big when you get that nat 20! I have to beef so much health because of this.

Flanking - Instituted around the In-Person table: when you flank you get a +2 to hit, not advantage. It’s less OP that way.

29. Do you prefer RP heavy sessions or combat sessions?

Usually RP heavy sessions are my favorite thing, but sometimes you just want to hit something. XD I’ve found I really like a healthy dose of both, but I love it when the combat functions to fuel RP, so RP is probs my more favorite kind.

30. Are your players diplomatic or murder hobos?

They’ve trended more diplomatic! I’m grateful for it, and it’s neat seeing what pushes characters into ‘murder’ when they start out with diplomacy.

31. What is your favorite class? Favorite race?

Oh golly, probably Rogue or Paladin for favorite class, but Bard is up there too. I love versatility, and Rogue and Bard are skill monkey classes that are super fun. Paladin’s whole ‘strength from your belief in an ideal’ is also hella fun tho, I like it when paladins draw power from belief not in a god, but in a principle that guides them. Favorite race is harder, I don’t really have a favorite- but I know I dislike playing as Dragonborn, Aarakokra, and Lizardfolk personally. They’re just not for me, I think.

[jhope-seok]

I have a lot of things to say about Tinder.

This is a personal rant about idiot boys on tinder. So if you’d like to read my CRAZY FUCKING ESCAPADES IN THE DATING WORLD. PLEASE. GO AHEAD. CLICK READ MORE. IT’LL BE INTERESTING. And fun. To watch me implode then explode.

Warnings: mentions of sex/sexting, lots of cursing, men being disgusting--potentially triggering, and one angry ass woman.

Warning part 2: this is A LOOOONG ASS POST, probably with a lot of grammatical errors. It’s 2am. (just so we’re all aware, it’s about 2.3k worth of ranting plus pictorial evidence)

So here’s the thing about me and tinder. I’ve been on the thing since I was in college, probably around junior year when I really came into the realization of my sexuality/being a pansexual person. Keep in mind this was like.....5 or 6 years ago now. I was interested in exploring my options, exhausted from going to countless frat parties and having random makeout sessions with boys who never asked for my number, and/or went on to makeout with the next girl they found at the party. Over the years I have collected an INFLUX of over 1,000 matches. I am not saying this number to brag, I am saying this number to give you an idea of how much of a credible fucking source I am when I present my case. And my case is as such.

ALL MEN ON TINDER ARE THE FUCKING. ABSOLUTE. WORST.

For perspective I have also dabbled in the following dating apps:

OKCupid (absolutely horrid. don’t do it. the shit i went through on this app....just. don’t get me started. I could make a whole other post about the atrocities of this site)

HER (really sad option for lesbian/bi/pan/women looking for other women)

Bumble (pretty successful but forcing the woman to speak first is annoying as hell and then giving a STRAIGHT MALE ONLY 24 HOURS TO RESPOND. Utter hell.)

Hinge (just...downright annoying)

CrossPaths (for christians. Honestly a good idea. Poorly executed. Poorly advertised).

Badoo (honestly...what the fuck)

Coffee Meets Bagel (good idea; too complicated)

Skout (nope)

The Game by Hot or Not (i don’t remember using this but my phone says it’s in my cloud)

And probably some others I can’t remember

What you should take away from this list is that

I’m a needy bitch

I was VERY DESPERATE at times

And i’ve tried a LOT OF OPTIONS.

therefore: don’t comment on this saying: well this worked, well that worked, try this, try that. No. Tinder is still one of the only options that actually works consistently and will continue to work because it is one of the least complicated among the dating apps.

Now. To my point that all men on tinder are the absolute fucking worst.

Time for some examples.

I will not be using these people’s real names, because that’s just mean. So I will present them to you in cases.

Case #1:

Me and this man matched about a year and a half ago, end of 2016. We were unable to meet up because I had a bunch of plans going on--at the time I worked in a law firm and my commute was hell so i only had time to go on dates on the weekends. And being that it was december I was busy every...single...weekend. Which he was fine with! (Awww what a kind gentlemen). No.

He had made it pretty clear from the beginning that he was really only in it for the sex. which for me at the time was fine. I let him know that I didn’t just fuck around on the first date. I lived--and still do live--with my mother and so he couldn’t just come over whenever and i couldn’t just leave whenever i wanted to spend the night at his place in D.C. He said that was fine. However, apparently he was not fine with that.

We talked for a month, lots of sexting, lots of naked snaps, whatever, whatever, we were basically waiting to jump each others bones. But I had also told him that I did not fuck on the first date. I had a rule. I would not break that rule. Again, he said he was fine with that.

On our first date--in a CROWDED RESTAURANT--for brunch, he kept whispering to me about how he wanted to push all of our plates off the table and fuck me in front of all those people. I politely told him to shut up because there were people sitting less than two feet away from us and that was inappropriate for sunday brunch to be talking like that (how proper of me....). Anyways, I let him walk me to my car in a garage, and as we approached it he came up behind me and forcefully turned me around to kiss him. I was like “ooh how hot. I like this.” Anyways, I drove him to his car, we made out a little, then we went on our separate ways. We had a second date not much longer after that, where we had agreed to go out to dinner BUT that first we were gonna fuck in his car. So we met up in a garage and we waited for the cars around us to leave and then we made out, and i sucked his dick. I did N O T let him have sex with me because I was annoyed that he was trying to push me to it--he had a daddy kink--and kept saying “ooh how hard do you want daddy to fuck you”. I said “You can only fuck me when I say you can, and I say no.” thank god he respected my boundaries. So I sucked him dry, then he “MAGICALLY” got a call from his work calling him in. I barely heard from him after that. Because he told me I should come over and spend the night so we could fuck. I said no. He ghosted me.

Case #2--Who knows:

Soooo many fucking men. Have ghosted me. For no reason. Like we’ll have a good few opening lines. And then....nothing. Forever. Where in the FUCK DID YOU GO?! Did you find someone better? Did you grow uninterested with our conversation?! Did you forget how to speak the English language? Did you decide you regretted swiping on me? The worst is when they don’t unmatch you and then it’s just left there....hanging.

Case #whatever:

The fucking men who ask if it’s okay to text. And then don’t text.

I don’t even remember this dude’s NAME in the first place to omit it, but we got into an argument because he supports the store brand cheese puff that is America’s president, and I matched him only so I could yell at him (yeah I know...whatever...I like to prove my dominance and tell boys why they’re wrong. Also because half of the time I use dating apps just to have conversations with people because I’m bored). Anyways. we got in this heated debate and he was like “I like your fire, you should text me here’s my number ____” blah. So I texted him cause i was interested enough in our debate to continue it. THE BITCH NEVER ANSWERED ME. LITERALLY....FOR MONTHS. PROBABLY OVER A YEAR. And then out of fucking nOWHERE he responds like “hey who is this again?” Dude...... NO.

Case #The Never Ending Message Senders:

These men are the worst. So I should explain myself first. I don’t really ever unmatch someone unless it’s for a good reason. Like they’re being disgusting, racist, homophobic, gross, call me fat, ugly, whatever. For the most part I don’t unmatch with someone because in the old days of tinder, unmatching would just PUT THE PERSON BACK IN YOUR CIRCUIT (good job tinder). I’m assuming they did this in case you deleted your tinder, or your app crashed and you had to restart, or you accidentally unmatched someone, whatever. So I don’t unmatch for the sole reason that I don’t want these jerks, who never took the time to respond to my hello or witty opening statement, back in my playing field. I don’t revisit my old matches, I don’t try to restart conversations with them.

If only men could learn the same fucking thing. I have so many men who CONSTANTLY message me. I’m talking like once in every blue moon. It’s like they let the conversation lie for a while, and then BAM another message. The ones I do actually unmatch are the ones that don’t wait a while. They just constantly message, hour after hour after hour until I either respond or unmatch. I don’t know a woman who WOULD respond after having gotten 10 messages of the same “Hello? You there?” “Member me?” (yes one dude has actually said “member me” to me. Not “remember me”...”member me”) etc. etc. in the course of a few hours. Take the hint dude. Please. I don’t enjoy being ghosted, but I know when to take a hint.

A perfect example of such case is the following!

(Context: I just updated the pictures in my tinder account today! So through tinder’s cool new facebook timeline! you can see when your matches update their profiles. to scroll through and judge them even further to see if they’ve gotten cuter or uglier through time).

Please take note of the dates attached to the message. For clarification, “today” is August 27th, 2018!

I have since unmatched him. Buddy. Please. Take the hint. (Also, how fucking creepy of him to say that I’ve gotten closer since a while back....like are you tracking my distance every time you message me? Please dear lord, no).

Case #THE IDIOTS WHO WAIT YEARS TO RESPOND.

This. THIS. THIIIIIS RIGHT HERE. IS WHAT HAS GOT MY BLOOD BOILED SO MUCH I NEEDED TO MAKE THIS POST. THE FUCKING IDIOTS WHO MATCH WITH ME. AND THEN CLAIM THAT THEY DELETED THEIR TINDER. OR THAT THEY LOST THEIR PHONE. JUST REDOWNLOADED. DIDN’T SEE MY MESSAGE. FOR FUCKING. YEARS.

OOOOOOOH BOY. You’ve gotta have some damn nerve to pull that shit. If you lost the app, deleted it, got a new phone, WHATEVER. Your profile would not continue to show up on the matching feed. People would not be able to swipe on your face to find that they matched with you. You would not exist in the eyes of tinder. You would be GONE from the system.

So don’t pull that shit with me. So many dudes have had the audacity to pull this shit with me, and when I call them out on it, most of the time I get either one of three responses: they say “oof yeah I’m sorry, I’m a dick can we move on?”, “Hahaha sorry” and then they continue to ghost me, or people who pull the shit I listed above.

These next photos are from THE SAME DAY AS THE PREVIOUS PHOTOS. Please take note of the date of the first message. (“today” in this sense is technically August 28, 2018 because it’s past midnight.)

Although I deleted his name, I gotta say. My insult was pretty on point. Anyways.

Like how the fuck can you live with yourself with that fucking lie?! Own up to that shit. Be like “yep oops sorry, didn’t think you were cute the first time but this snapchat filter making u look damn good” like don’t be a DOUCHE DUDE. Men are just honestly so fucking frustrating. And yes you better fucking believe I sent that reason for unmatching to tinder. You best fucking BELIEVEEEEEEE I did that. I’m so fucking mad at men. Like how in the hell.

I’ve HONESTLY had better luck matching with MARRIED COUPLES on tinder than I have had with straight men. Married couples at least know how to respect people. God damn.

YOUR MOTHERS DID NOT RAISE YOU TO BE LIKE THIS, MEN. LEARN HOW TO BE DECENT HUMAN BEINGS. JESUS CHRIST.

All in all, if you’ve ever toyed with the idea of downloading tinder: Don’t. Stay out of the fucking awful shit that is Tinder and dating apps for as long as you can. I have my settings set up to men in their 30s, and honestly older men do not mean more mature men. Just absolutely frustrating.

Also, as an addendum: 

Case #Don’t put my height in my bio/or do and say “Cause I guess it’s important/matters”

To all males on the planet earth: PUT. YOUR. FUCKING. HEIGHT. IN. YOUR. BIO. It fucking matters. As a tall as woman, it is so fucking annoying to match with a cute dude and then have them say “Hey I’m 5′2″ is that okay?” um....no. I’m sorry buddy. That is not okay. I have strict height limits for this ride and 5′2″ does not pass the riding restrictions.

We’re gonna call in a CELEBRITY SHOT for this story, I matched with this dude on bumble who didn’t have his height in his profile. (Context: my bumble profile says “5′10″ cause it doesn’t matter” <--a nice jab at all the straight dudes out there) and we go about having this great conversation, we’re clicking, he knows one of my friends from college, we bond, we go on a date. THE FIRST THING OUT OF THIS ASSHOLE’S MOUTH ON OUR DATE WAS “WOW. You’re taller than I expected.” BITCH HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CAN U READ. IT’S THE FIRST THING IN MY BIO.

Sub case: I once had a guy match with me, tell me he was shorter than me, then asked me if I would be okay owning him as my slave. I understand and respect everyone’s fetishes, considering I have a slight dominance fetish as well, but a hello would have been nice first.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[dermagain]

So after logging in for the first time in- honestly I wanna say a year 😟- I found a private message from someone asking me what has been helping me get better

and like an idiot I immediately accidentally deleted the message. So, sorry person that I can't message you back, but I'm gonna post this and hopefully you'll see it. I've been through a lot of major life changes in the past couple years and haven't really been on tumblr at all (sadly! I've been on a limited data plan too, so I deleted the app). I hope you've all been well in the meantime and are managing ok

This is going to be a very long post, but I'll try to break it up into paragraphs that will make it easier to skim for what you find useful. Quick warning, I'm going to be mentioning eating disorders a few times, but without going into details. First off, I'll go into a couple of the big developments in my life that are derma-relevant. A few months ago I was finally diagnosed with bipolar II, which consists mostly of depressive episodes, but has to be treated differently than unipolar depression, since antidepressants without a mood stabilizer can cause bipolar cycling. I'm now on a mood stabilizer, which is working well, and I'm finding that without bipolar cycling I have less anxiety, leading to less need for self-soothing rituals, which for me leads to less picking. If you might have an underlying condition that's exacerbating your picking, please go see a doctor/psychologist/psychiatrist if you can and haven't already. It took me several of them over several years to be taken seriously, and I'm going to follow up with a separate post with some of the details on how I finally got through to the professionals, in case that's helpful. Another change in my life is that I've relocated, moving out of state after (mostly) living where I come from into my adult years. Being away from all the places and things that pull me back into old traumas and outdated anxieties has helped A LOT. Of course, moving isn't a solution for everyone, and it requires some money and a lot of freedom, and it's stressful... my point is really just that external circumstances play a big role in how we feel and behave and it's worth making whatever positive changes you can. They won't "fix" your derma, but if you can focus on some of your other goals you may find that you're picking less. But of course, change just triggers some people, so it's very important to take what you know about yourself into account on this one. Now, to address the question I deleted, I'm gonna lay out a bunch of the strategies that were working for me before all that: I read a post by someone in the derma community several years ago recommending the book The Four Day Win by Martha Beck, and read it. I wish I remembered who suggested this or where, so I could give credit, but this was probably 5 years back and I have no idea. It's a diet book, but many of the chapters apply to reducing any behavior that you're trying to break out of, and adapt well to skin picking. I had a hard time pushing through the book because I'm extremely anti-diet and firmly believe that advocating dieting is also advocating eating disorders. Several members of my family have struggled with eating disorders, so there were times when I wanted to throw this book across the room, but ultimately I found it helpful. You can probably get a copy from your local library if you want to read it, but I'm also going to give a capsule version here of what I found helpful/adapted from the book for my own use. The premise is that instead of setting ourselves up for failure by trying to do something difficult *indefinitely* (sticking to a diet or not picking, for example), we only commit to four days at a time, and give ourselves a reward when we complete a four day cycle. The rewards, for me, were something small and concrete, usually buying myself something inexpensive that I wanted. When the four days was up, I was allowed to pick all I wanted, but then would start another four days of not picking right after. If four days is too long to manage, you can always use shorter times. I would often do 3 days, but if 2 or even 1 whole day is more realistic for you it's more important to set a very specific time and then reward yourself at the end. You have to be consistent with the reward, not giving yourself the reward anyway if you do pick, and not sacrificing it (to save money or whatever) if you do make your goal. It's like training an animal, except we are the animal we're training. Make sure your rewards aren't anything you pretty much need, since that becomes a system of punishments for not making it, and in order to work this has to be a system of rewards for doing well. It's an entirely positive system. I would sometimes get myself a larger reward if I didn't pick (or barely picked) between 3 or 4 day no-picking periods, but didn't plan ahead for that because you really need to keep your mind on the short term when doing this. If I did pick when I wasn't supposed to, I would sometimes give myself a reduced version of the original reward if I made it to the end of the original 4 days without doing it again. For instance, if I was going to buy a new set of paint brushes, I might scale it back to choosing an individual brush. Or if I felt like it was realistic, I would start another 4 days immediately after lapsing. Being as realistic as possible is important for this one. Another thing I would do is keep a log of where on my body I was picking, when, how many individual spots I was going at, and any particularly pertinent facts like an unusual mood or triggering event. I was putting it in the calendar on my phone so the time was recorded automatically, and I had a system of abbreviations that kept it easy. An entry might read "f4, a2 (blood), s4. Very anxious", which would mean I picked at 4 spots on my face, 2 on my arms to the point of drawing blood, and 4 spots on my shoulders, and that I was experiencing an unusual degree of anxiety. I would differentiate between my arms and shoulders because my shoulders are a particular problem area for me, but I also pick at my scalp sometimes, so I would indicate my scalp with an "h" for head, since "s" was shoulders. If I picked at an area enough that I couldn't say a specific number of spots, I would just say "bad", like "a2, sbad, l3" would mean I picked 2 spots on my arms and 3 on my legs and really took it out on my shoulders. Of course, you would adapt your log to what is most pertinent or useful for you. The log served a few purposes. For one, just having more awareness can be really helpful, also I would actually sometimes hold off on picking just because if I did it, I would have to acknowledge it in writing. I would sometimes stop myself in time to put down a number instead of "bad". It also makes it easier to see when you've been doing pretty well lately, and feel good about it. Prepping to pick helped too, instead of denying that I was going to do it until the very last minute and then going at it impulsively. I would get home at night or in the afternoon and wash my hands with antibacterial soap first thing, then rinse my face and put on a face mask that I could keep on for a couple hours. Its best if you can do that without being in front of a mirror, which could mean using your kitchen sink or covering your bathroom mirror. If you can't do that, try not to even glance at the mirror if you can manage. I got pretty good at keeping my eyes down completely while going through this routine. When I eventually had to rinse off the mask, if I did get sucked into picking at least my hands and face were clean and the skin on my face was in pretty good shape so the damage was minimized and the spots I picked at wouldn't flare up and get infected from getting all the dirt you pick up outside in them (gross, I know). Honey works pretty well in place of commercial face masks, cause it's a physical barrier and great for your skin, but you have to be more committed to avoiding mirrors, since you can still see your skin through honey. Besides face masks/honey, there were other physical barriers that helped. Pretty much everyone comments on this, but it bears repeating. I would wear shirts at home that were tight in the sleeves so getting at my shoulders wasn't convenient, which honestly is something I need to get back in the habit of doing. As you can probably tell from all the past-tense, I'm doing well lately, but my arms and shoulders are what I go for most when I do pick. If there were only a couple visible spots on my face, I would cover them with band-aids, and I would sometimes wear gloves at home. I've also made lists for myself of anything that's helpful, meaning both practical tips and alternatives to picking (even if they sound dumb or obvious), and information that it's helpful for me to remind myself of. I have an old list in front of me right now, and some of the suggestions on it are super simple, but were actually helpful for whatever reason. Some of them actually strike me as kind of self-shaming now, but inspired me at the time. Whatever works, I guess. Here are some of the items from the list (the not-shamey ones): Wait it out. Later is better than now. Drink some water. Have a snack. Take a nap. Put on long sleeves. Consciously remember not to do it. Turn out the lights. Watch a movie. Read a book. Listen to music. This is an outgrown coping mechanism. This is an internalization of being "picked on." I don't want to let people who have treated me unfairly manifest themselves in me. DON'T do "just one" (it's never just one). Relapse is a normal part of recovery, and it doesn't determine the future. Adherence is the goal, but near-adherence is almost as good. If I can't do 100%, I can try for 90%, or 75%. It's still worth maintaining, even if it's not perfect. No comment made by any idiot is my problem. Relax and breathe. Remember to eat, sleep, and play music. I really don't need to touch my face at all except for daily skincare. Even MH "just stopped". I'll explain that last item. It's a reference to Marya Hornbacher's memoir, Wasted. Marya had a severe eating disorder for years, to the point that it almost killed her (you may know this part, it's been a popular title for a while...) Like I said, my family history is peppered with eating disorders, so I've put in my due diligence reading up on them. She reaches the point of almost dying, and then -like some kind of miracle- she "just stops" the behavior that would otherwise have taken her life. The reason I included that as a kind of affirmation isn't because I think my picking will "just stop", but rather because it's such an extreme example of how people sometimes turn a corner in their struggles and start to get better, no matter how bleak their future looked during their darkest times. Anyway, making lists like this are helpful if you can include whatever helps YOU to remember, not what helps someone else, or only things you don't think are obvious. If it's obvious and it helps you, put it on the list. If it's not clear why exactly it's relevant but it helps you, put it on the list. Then keep your list someplace handy, like on your wall or taped to your desk, or in the back of your journal. I hope some of this helps y'all, sorry it's 5 miles long, but I wanted to include everything I could think of. Love you all. Best.

[ground5]

Easy Steps to Start an Business

If you have business on mind, there’s no time better than now to do it.  There are no limits on who can become a great businessman. You don't necessarily need a college degree, a bunch of money in the bank or even business experience to start something that could become the next major success. However, what you do need is a strong plan and the drive to see it through.

Check out this step-by-step guide to help turn your big idea into a successful business: 1. Write down your vision. You can’t get somewhere without knowing what the vision for your business and your life is. While the end result of your business will probably look a little different than your initial vision, you have to have the end result in mind to start. What do you want to do with your business? Try answering these three simple questions about your product or service and you’ll have a business vision nailed: What is it? What do I get? How do I get it? 2. Research your market. This is such a boring step. There’s no way around it & it’s in depth. It’s for those exact reasons many well-intentioned first-timers at Business will want to skip over this part. Sure, you asked your family and a few friends and they say your idea is great, so you’ve got a market, right? Wrong. You need to look back at the questions that help you with your vision and drill into them again. What is it, and more important for your research, why would someone want it? What do I get from you that I can’t get from someone else or something else? How am I getting it and how is that delivery method better, cheaper, faster or easier for me? These are all helpful questions to see where the market is for your business and what pain points you’ll need to solve for your market with your offering. 3. Create something you can sell. If you can’t solve a problem for your market, you aren’t going to make any sales large enough to sustain a business. It’s that simple. Make sure whatever your business is offering, it solves a problem, because you can market and sell the solution to that problem for a viable business. 4. Get a website. Now that you’ve figured out your market and product offering, you’ll need a website. It doesn’t matter if you’re a retail or online business; both need a website no matter what. You don’t have to spend a fortune on a website to start. Purchase a domain from a site such as GoDaddy or Host Gator. If you’re handy with WordPress, you can install a theme for free or a small fee and get started. If you aren’t handy with WordPress, use a build-it yourself, idiot-proof site-building service such as Wix. If you really don’t want to deal with it, look to UpWork to outsource your website design.

5. Outline your automation. These days, most businesses require some level of marketing and sales automation to really scale. You hear a lot about passive income, and getting your marketing and sales processes as automated as possible will help you maximize the opportunities for truly passive income. Even if you don’t want a passive income business and are actively planning to market your business, you’re still going to want things such as product registration, order tracking and purchases to have some level of automation. Examples include a thank you email, confirmation or upsell offer. Think about the total user experience from visit to purchase on your site and outline what you think are good points for automated messaging or sales offers. Build it on paper ahead of time. Depending on the size of your budget and needs, look into the sales and marketing automation standard for small businesses, Infusionsoft. 6. Set up a sales funnel. If you don’t need the robust offering of a site such as Infusionsoft just yet for your business, look at sales funnel-specific software programs such as Lead Pages. These plug and play into email service providers and payment processing vendors and can be a nice option for small businesses just starting out until they’re ready to scale to bigger platforms. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); 7. Set up an email opt-in.  First, you’ll need an email service, such as AWeber or MailChimp, or if you have Infusionsoft or another bigger service provider such as Marketo, email will be part of the platform already. Once you have your email service, you’ll want to ensure there are plenty of places for people to opt-in to your email list on your website, on your landing pages from your sales funnel and anywhere else it’s appropriate. The key to a great, scalable business is a healthy, robust email app. 8. Start a Facebook page. Facebook is a great, free tool for spreading brand awareness and linking to your landing pages and website. If you create and curate really valuable content consistently, you’ll build up a following that can help drive your business and your brand. 9. Create valuable, shareable content. You can post your content on your website, syndicate it through services such as Rebel Mouse and post to your own Facebook page. However, if you want the word to really spread, make sure each piece you post is easily sharable so you can build organic traffic and word of mouth. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); 10. Refine, tweak and improve as you go. You’ll never be done, but follow the previous nine steps and you should be on your way to establishing your business and your plan of action. As you implement each step, remember that you’ll need to continuously learn from each part of the process to tweak and improve as you go. The more you learn and make corrections, the better your business will be positioned for success in the long term. Tip: Today online business is the most effective small business that you can begin with. You start earning money from the comfort of your home. You can make hell lot of money with minimum investment. So, Good Luck! See you on the field. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); Read the full article