#it’s been like 4 years and i can’t get over it still. i’ve tried moving on ive tried dating other people | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lunajay33 · 1 month ago

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Why Me?

•🤎🐺🪵🍂🌑•

Summary: Bella and Y/n are twins but when Bella and Renee moved away you stayed with Charlie always growing closer with the people around La push, but when Bella comes back it’s like everything is flipped around, Bella becomes distant obsessed with the cullens, you find solace with the guys at the beach but things change after the first year and suddenly you’re all alone, will anyone come back, will Paul your best friend, your forever crush come save you from depression

Pairing: Paul Lahote x f!reader

Warnings: Depression, suicidal thoughts

Part.2

•Masterlist•

It was a simple life in forks but I loved it this is where I’m meant to be, I can’t explain it but it calls to me, the rainy weather, the cool breeze, the calm beach at La push, even my group of friends made my life feel complete

Plus I had dad or as Bella called him, Charlie, after mom and Bella left when I was only 4 it was usually just the two of us, suppers out at the cafe or cozy nights at Jacob’s as they watched the game, I kept him a float after the devastating heart break even thought I was young, mom tried to take me with them the night everything happened but I held on to dad screaming for him to keep me, and here we are today just me and him it was perfect everything was exactly how it should be, then we got the call Bella was moving back I was nervous at first I haven’t seen her since she stopped visiting years ago

“I’ll be back later, be safe and if you go out leave a note okay sweetie?” Dad stated as he picked up the keys to his police cruiser

“Okay dad! Drive safe” we shared a hug before he left leaving me alone and anytime I was free I’d either walk through the forest behind my house or hang out at the beach with Paul or Jacob

I pulled on a coat and hiking boots heading to the over grown trees lining the backyard, the weather is not too cold but it’s still over cast, the trees are lined with a thick moss the ground littered with pine cones and varying animals tracks

Sometimes I’d find Paul trying to blow off steam out here so hopefully I’ll come across him today needing my best friend right now with all the stress I’ve been feeling about Bella’s return

After a bit more walking I heard groaning as I approached the cliff we sometimes would hang out on, I rounded a tree and saw Paul sitting there huffing and puffing, he’s always had anger issues growing up but I was always there for him and for some reason I was the only one to calm him down

Silently I sat next to him laying my head on his shoulder his arm instinctly wrapping around my waist quickly finding comfort in each others company

“Remember when we were nine and you were so angry that Jacob took my ice cream, you pushed him into a puddle and got me a new ice cream and I had to keep you calm away from Jake the rest of my party” I stated laughing remember how cute he was and that’s the day my crush on him started which grew over the years but I’d never tell him that, I can’t risk what I have with him

He sighed squeezing my hip his breathing calming down

“I couldn’t help it you were so excited all day for your ice cream and that look in your face when he took it mad me so mad, you know I hate seeing you upset”

“Don’t get soft on me Lahote” he huffed out a laugh

“What’s wrong Paul? Anything I can do to help?” I asked finally looking up at him

He looked hesitant his eyes looking anywhere but me, I drew my hand through his long beautiful black hair trying to ease his worries

“Just a lot lately, things with the older tribe members don’t worry about it, how about you Bella’s coming today you still nervous?”

“Yeah what if we’re not like how we were as kids, what if she doesn’t like me anymore I mean I know I can be a burden sometimes but I just want my sister”

“Hey what did I tell you about talking about yourself like that, she’s gonna love you and you’re not a burden why do you think the guys and everyone around you loves you?”

Sometimes when he’d get sweet talking like this it only made me love him more, feeling the blush spread across my cheeks I pushed his arm playfully trying to hide my feelings

“You’ll always be here for me right Paul, even when we both have stuff going on you’ll be here?” My hands fiddling together

“Always”

It’s been a week since Bella’s moved back and it’s been nice, we reconnected and talked before bed most nights just catching up on everything, and it was nice to have a friend at school now, I never really had friend at the forks school, I tried but no one ever bothered, plus all my friends down at La push is better than anyone here

Sitting at my usual lunch table by the windows I glance over seeing Bella with her whole new table of friends, she said she’d sit with me if it bothered me to be alone but I didn’t want to get in the way of her making new friends plus I saw how she’d rather be with them it was the perfect spot to look at the cullens, who she’d make goggly eyes at every lunch

But the day dragged on as usual but when that final bell rang I was free, I ran out the door heading straight to where Paul usually parked to pick me up but he wasn’t there which was strange he was never late

“Hey y/n do you need a ride?” Bella called from a few spots down waiting at her truck

“Oh ummm no I should be fine maybe he’s just running late” I waved her off just hoping he was okay

I sat on the stairs watching as the cars emptied the parking lot one by one till there was no one but me and the setting sun

I sighed realizing he wasn’t coming so I started walking home, once I got through the door I dialed Paul on the house phone my heart beating anxiously

The tones rang one after another but no answer so I called Jacob instead and of course he answered immediately

“Hello Black residence” his chipper voice always made me smile he was such a sweet guy

“Hi Jake it’s y/n Paul didn’t pick me up today and I was wondering do you know if he’s okay?”

“Oh no I haven’t heard…..” I heard a mumbled voice behind him then the voice changed

“Who is this?” And I recognized that voice it was Sam Uley

“Hey Sam it’s me y/n swan! Ummm sorry if I interrupted something I was just calling worried about Paul, have you seen him around?”

“Oh he’s gonna be under the weather for a while he’s caught a stomach bug, we don’t wanna risk you getting sick too”

“Can I visit just to drop off soup or something?” My heart ached knowing what he’d say

“I’m sorry honey not yet, it’ll be awhile just give him time”

“But……but he’s my best friend” my voice wavered haven’t never being apart from him for a long period of time there was this pull to him I always felt so being apart felt…….wrong

“Just give it time honey, I’ve gotta go, goodnight” and with that he hung up the phone felt heavy in my hand

I’ve seen Paul every day since he got his licence, he’s a year older so when he got it he promised to pick me up everyday to make sure I was safe, Bella can drive me now but it’s not the same after a long day I’d get in his truck and cuddle up to his side and drive down to the beach and relax

“Sweetie why are you crying?” Dad broke me out of my thoughts as he hung up the phone

“Oh it’s nothing just….pauls sick I’m just worried”

“That kid is strong he’ll be just fine” he smiled patting my shoulder before he got a soda from the fridge

The days dragged on and I thought he’d atleast pick up the phone when I called or even call me but nothing, not a word and now a month has gone by I thought I’d have Bella but she quickly became all involved with Edward Cullen, the older member of the tribe weren’t quite fond of their family they told me stories but I thought it was all just legends never thinking too much about them

So now without Bella and Paul I was alone, my world felt flipped upside down, everything use tk be perfect but now I felt ripped of who I was, I fell hollow, drained, the all crushing depression, I can’t sleep evident by the dark circles under my eyes, I can barely eat shown by the hollows covering my body and the clothes that hung on my body, I felt like I’m dying, I’m fading

I’ve never been through a break up but this can’t be how it feels this has to be something different, something more painful

School was like hell, even worse than before, Bella convinced me some days to sit with her and the cullens and Alice was always trying to cheer me up but nothing was ever permanent

I picked at my rice as Emmett bragged about how he beat Edward in a baseball game

“Still not feeling well?” Jasper asked next to me, the first time I’ve ever heard him speak

“I think somethings wrong with me, I think I’m dying” everyone stopped what they were talking about and eyes were on me but I didn’t care anymore

“Why would you say that y/n?” Alice spoke

I sighed excusing myself from the table walking away, they couldn’t understand but maybe the elders could, I called dad and he said he’d be at the school to pick me up seeing as work was going slow

A few minutes later the cruiser pulled up and I got in the front seat

“Sick again?” He asked worry written all over his face

I’ve been calling him to pick me up from school a lot, either from spells of nausea throwing up or just the overwhelming depression

“Can you take me to Emily’s?” She was like a aunt to me always so sweet and that’s what I needed right now

“Of course sweetie” the drive was silent until we pulled into the gravel drive way seeing Sam and Emily step out

“Try and relax okay, I’ll pick you up whenever you’d like just call” I managed a smile and got out seeing him drive away

I walked up the porch steps straight into Emily’s arms

“Oh honey what’s happened we haven’t seen you in so long” she said stepping back taking in my clearly broken and sick appearance, the baggy brown hoodie that use to fit relative tight and some ratty sweat pants, my hair pulled into two messy braids

“Somethings wrong Emily, I didn’t know who else to ask” finally letting the tears stream down my face, she squeezed my hands giving Sam a desperate look as she led me inside

I sat on the couch as she dropped a fluffy blanket over my legs telling Sam to make me a hot chocolate

“What’re you feeling hun? How did all this start” her voice always soothed me

“I can’t eat or sleep, I can’t feel it’s like I’m hollow inside and it hurts, not just emotionally I physically get sick all the time, dad brought me to the doctors and they say nothing is medically wrong” Sam placed the drink on the table infront of me and sat next to Emily on the couch across from me

“When did this all start?” He asked

“The day Paul left me, I know it sounds crazy but…….its likes a piece of me died when he stopped coming around” they looked at eachother with knowing looks

“You’re not crazy”

“Then what? Do you know what’s wrong with me?” I ask almost pleading

“I might, how about you and Emily catch up and rest, I’ll be back soon” and with that he left leaving me confused

The sun started setting and I didn’t want to bother Emily more that needed

“I think I’m gonna head home, thanks for having me today” I said pulling on my coat at the door

“Do you want me to call Charlie it’s a long walk hun”

“Oh no I’m…..I need some air I’ll be fine”

“Okay but be safe and call me when you get home so I know everything okay?”

“Okay Em” I faked a smile and left feeling the cool breeze hit me, but I lied theres no going home this time, I’m going to where I last had him, the cliffs

The walk was long and cold but when I finally made it the moon was shining bright over head, dropping to my knees I cried and cried until there was no more tears left

What was the point anymore he’s never coming back so this pain will never go away I feel like I’m fading away anyways

Standing up I neared the cliff edge the sea breeze blowing up from far below

“Maybe in another life I’ll find you Paul” then a quick breeze whooshed past my body opening my eyes I wasn’t at the cliff anymore but in the deep forest

Emmett Cullen right infront of me, confused and upset I step away crossing my arms over my chest

“Emmett why would you stop me, what’re you even doing here” I sigh wanting to just scream

“What the hell were you thinking, why would you try to kill yourself what about Bella what about Charlie?”

“It hurts so much Emmett can you just make it go away, I wanna be okay again”

“This isn’t suppose to happen to you, you’re suppose to be Bella’s sweet shy sister” he sighs pulling me into a tight cold hug, nothing like how it felt with Paul

“Not anymore Em”

“Do you wanna come over I can make you anything you want and I can make a cozy spot for you infront of the fire place”

“Oh I couldn’t impose like that”

“If Bella’s family now so are you” before I could agree a growl rumbled through the trees

Turning a grey wolf the size of a mini van emerged from the trees its eyes piercing at Emmett

“Emmett what do we do?” I ask scared gripping his arm

“Calm down you’ll be okay just trust me okay”

“O…okay” and the next second he was gone in the blink of an eye

He left me, I turn back to the wolf that no longer growled but was whining, getting closer it laid down infront of me nudging my leg with its snout, suddenly the fear dissapeared

I lean down and cautiously rubbed my hand through its soft fur hearing it grumble, sitting in front of it it moved forward laying its head across my lap completely covering it

“You’re quite beautiful, like a gentle giant” rubbing its fur helped sooth me bringing me back to reality of what I almost did tonight

“I can’t believe I almost ended it all tonight, he’ll come back to me soon right? I’ll be happy again someday won’t I?”

I licked at my hand whining

“He promised he wouldn’t leave me, he always said he’d protect me and he always made me happy I don’t know what to do without him”

The wolf got up motioning to get on it back and for some reason I didn’t think twice about it, hopping on I held onto its next as it made its way down the path back the way I came

Right back to Emily’s house

Part.2

Taglist: @lilredcamaro14 @cvmtitss @larissa01-blog2

#twilight wolfpack #paul lahote x oc #paul lahote x you #paul lahote x y/n #paul lahote x reader #paul lahote one shot #paul lahote imagine #paul lahote #twilight x reader #twilight angst #twilight imagine #twilight oneshot #twilight fluff #twilight wolves #twilight fanfiction #twilight saga #twilight #emmett cullen x y/n #y/n swan

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walkingintheheartbreaksatellite · 1 year ago

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I Want Forever

Harry Styles x fem!reader

Gif credit goes to @londonharry (So sorry! I don’t normally use gifs so I forgot to give credit!)

Summary- Harry and Y/N broke up early into Love On Tour. Harry struggled to truly move on, as did Y/N. With tour over, a lost soul shows up at Y/N’s door one night, ready for forever.

Warnings- angst, smooshiness, you may cry

>>>————————->

September 2021

“Y/N, love, please! I haven’t seen you in weeks! Can’t you take just a bit of time off to come to my next show?”

I sigh into the phone and shake my head, knowing full well he can’t see me.

“Harry, you know I can’t! I’m swamped with school! I skipped 4 assignments and took zeroes for them when I was with you last! This is my future-.”

“And what about our future?! I told you! I want a life with you! You don’t need to be working this hard! You don’t even need to work!”

I scoff and bite my lip.

“Harry, you know I won’t! My career is important! This is what I’m working so hard for! I want to work and I want to be somebody! Not just a pop star’s girlfriend! You’re always gone. If you can’t drop your career for me then you shouldn’t ask me to drop mine for you. I thought you understood that..?”

My heart breaks more and more as he sighs into the phone.

“So that’s it then? You’re just… You’re giving up on us?”

“Harry-.”

“No, no, don’t bother. We should just end it before it gets worse for either of us. I hope things work out for you, Y/N.”

He hangs up and with that, I breakdown. I cry and I cry, praying that this was just a nightmare. But I knew he was right. And without Harry… I could focus…

July 2023

It had been a long week. In fact, it had been a long few years. After the break up, I distanced myself a lot. I got off of social media and threw myself into finishing school and eventually, entered, I got my dream job.

As much as I love helping kids, the ones that are like me and the ones that struggle worse, it breaks my heart. After the break up, I got myself back into therapy to cope.

While I am no longer spiraling, the pain is still there. I never tried to get my things. I never made contact again. I just ran. I ran from everything.

After another long, emotional day of work, I stumble into my apartment and crash on my couch. After giving myself a few moments to scream my frustrations into the couch cushion, I get up and make myself a light dinner before getting some extra work done.

I park myself down at the coffee table with a glass of white wine and a frozen dinner, turning my attention to my laptop when there’s a knock at the door. I glare curiously at the door and hesitantly get up, making my way to the door.

I hesitantly open it and my mouth drops when I see who’s on the other side of the door.

“Harry…”

He looks in my eyes, his face sullen.

“Y/N…”

Before I can really think, I try to close the door but I hear a small ‘ow’ from the other side of the door. I look down and see Harry’s foot in the door. I sigh and let it go, opening it again. He looks at me and pulls his foot back.

“Can we… Can we talk?”

I fold my arms and frown.

“We don’t have anything to talk about. Now if you’ll excuse me-.”

“Y/N, please! Just- Just hear me out!”

He steps forward and I take a step back as he backs me into my apartment and closes the door.

“There’s nothing left to say, Harry. I’ve made my peace. Obviously you have too. So you should just go-.”

He places his hands on my arms and looks into my eyes.

“Y/N, you’re all I’ve thought about since we broke up… I have missed you so.. So much, love. And I know I was horrible to you and I will never forgive myself for that. But I can’t- I need you, Y/N. I can’t take one more day without you…”

Tears well up in my eyes and I shake my head.

“You can’t just come back into my life and say that! You were the one that ended things Harry, you! I supported you through everything! And you couldn’t support me?! My career is important to me! School was important! You were important!”

I take a deep breath, trying to calm down before I continue.

“I shouldn’t have to choose between them! And you made the choice for me! And you, you moved on! Multiple times! I-.”

Harry shakes his head, tears spilling down his soft cheeks.

“That’s not true! I- I couldn’t… It was hard, Y/N! I-I made a mistake… I tried to move on but I just couldn’t.. I missed you Y/N. I miss you. And.. I just want you back. I-I know I don’t deserve you, even after all I’ve done… But I just can’t let you go. I refuse to let you go without a fight.”

Before I can say anything, Harry moves to his knees and he takes me hands, forcing me to look down at him.

“Harry-.”

He pulls out a ring box, his hands shaking as tears continue to spill down his cheeks.

“Just.. Hear me out. The last two years, I have done nothing but berate myself for chasing you away. No matter how I tried to move on, you were always on my mind. 3 years. You were with me from the start. And I wasn’t there for you like I should’ve been-.”

I attempt to pull him up and he shakes his head.

“Just wait. Please just let me finish… I made a mistake Y/N… But I don’t want to make another… Please… Y/N L/N… Will you marry me? Will you let be make it up to you? I will spend the rest of my life making sure you never feel like you have to choose. I’ll support you and I’ll-.”

I begin to cry and I drop to my knees as I sob. Harry drops the ring box and takes my cheeks in his hands, wiping my tears away with his thumb as he makes me look at him. His expression softens though his eyes remain teary, and he gives me a small smile.

“I am so, so sorry my love. I will spend every day making sure you know just how much I love you. And I know have a lot to make up for but please.”

I sigh and close my eyes for a minute. I take a deep breath before opening them again.

“Yes… I’ll marry you, Harry.”

His eyes light up and he opens his mouth to speak but I place my finger on his lips, stopping him.

“But I have a few conditions. These past couple years haven’t been easy. For the first few months… I couldn’t stand even hearing your name-… I want to go to therapy. You and me. Couples counseling. And- I want to take some time to heal… You coming back is putting salt in old wounds.”

He lets go of my cheeks and looks down, his sides dropping. I sigh and despite my better judgment, I wrap my arms around his neck and I kiss him. His eyes widen for a moment before he sinks into the kiss, deepening it. After a minute or so, I pull away and Harry looks into my eyes.

“I want you to listen to me, okay?”

He’s quiet for a second before he nods, gesturing me to continue.

“You made a mistake. And you’re owning up to it. I want to be with you Harry, I do. But I think we need to spend some time working through things together before we tie the not.”

He’s quiet for a moment before I hear him grab something off the floor.

“So… Does that mean you don’t want to wear the ring yet?”

I let out a small snort and shake my head. I pull away from him and hold my right hand out to him.

“No, gimmie that! I had been waiting for that! But it does mean that you’ll have to wait a little longer before you can marry me.”

He smiles and slips the ring on my finger and picks me up, twirling me around in his arms as I laugh.

It won’t be easy, but I want forever, and I want it with him.

>>>—————->

I hope you enjoyed lovelies! I would definitely be open to writing more for them!!! Requests are closed for now, until I catch up, but I will let you know when they’re open again!

Tag List

@be-with-me-so-happily @swiftmendeshoran @babyiamperfectforyou @freedomfireflies @kaminokatie @harrysmimi @violetsandfluff @fruitmans @fruitmansrecs @strwbrrydaydreams @rafaaoli @kimmi-kat @erggggggggg

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cursedlovesstuff · 7 months ago

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Fixing Us. Part 4.

In the car, Nat’s mind raced with doubts and fears as she navigated through the city traffic.

Wanda sat beside her, scrolling through her phone, looking for recipes, but it was hard to ignore the storm of thoughts swirling inside Nat’s head.

“Stop overthinking, Nat,” Wanda said suddenly, breaking the silence.

Nat glanced over, startled. “What are you talking about?”

“Your thoughts are loud,” Wanda replied, not looking up from her phone. “You’re overthinking everything that could go wrong.”

“Because a lot could go wrong, Wanda. This is Y/N we’re talking about,” Nat said, gripping the steering wheel tightly.

“I know, which is why you shouldn’t overthink. It’s not helping,” Wanda replied gently.

“I can’t stop overthinking. What if she’s falling out of love with me? What if there’s someone else? What if she doesn’t trust me anymore?” Nat’s voice grew more anxious with each question.

“If she was falling out of love, she wouldn’t give you a chance to fix things. You’re Y/N’s blind spot; she still loves you and she’s still in love with you. If she wasn’t, she would have left by now,” Wanda said firmly.

“Maybe you’ll realize that when you stop pushing her away.”

“I don’t push Y/N away,” Nat retorted defensively.

“You push everyone away, Nat,” Wanda countered, finally putting her phone down. “When you get stressed out and when work gets tough, you shut down emotionally. You try to pretend everything is fine when you’re struggling. You lose focus and forget important things, and Y/N puts up with it.”

Nat remained silent, her knuckles white as she gripped the steering wheel.

Wanda continued, “She tries to get you to sleep, to eat, to train. She tries to keep you on schedule so you don’t fall apart. After so many years, I couldn’t tell you why she still tries to keep you from spiraling.”

Nat sighed deeply, feeling a pang of guilt. “I know I’ve been difficult. I know I’ve taken her for granted.”

“You need to show her that you appreciate her, that you’re willing to put in the effort to make things right,” Wanda said softly. “The reason why I’m helping you is not just for the sake of your relationship, but for the sake of Y/N. She deserves happiness just as much as any of us she has also had a rough life, especially after everything she has done for you.”

“Everything she has done for me?” Nat repeated, sensing there was more to that statement than Wanda was letting on.

Wanda’s eyes flickered with something unspoken, but she didn’t elaborate. “Look, we’re here,” she said instead, nodding towards the parking lot of the shopping center.

Nat pulled into a parking space, turned off the engine, and sat there for a moment, collecting her thoughts. “Thank you, Wanda,” she said quietly. “I don’t know what I’d do without your support.”

Wanda smiled warmly. “That’s what friends are for. Now, let’s get this dinner sorted out. We’ve got a lot of work to do.”

They walked into the grocery store, grabbing a cart. Nat glanced at the shopping list Wanda had compiled. “So, shrimp alfredo and garlic toast?”

“Yep, and we’ll need fresh ingredients to make it special. Let’s start with the seafood section,” Wanda suggested.

As they moved through the aisles, Wanda continued to offer advice. “Remember, it’s not just about the dinner. It’s about showing Y/N that you’re willing to put in the effort, that you’re thinking about her and what she likes.”

“I know,” Nat said, picking out a bag of fresh shrimp. “I just hope it’s not too late.”

“It’s never too late if you’re willing to make a change,” Wanda reassured her, placing a loaf of fresh bread in the cart.

As they moved to the produce section, Wanda picked up a bag of flour. Nat furrowed her brow in confusion. “Why do we need flour? Aren’t we just buying pasta?”

Wanda shook her head with a smile. “We’re making the pasta from scratch. It tastes better, and only the best for Y/N.”

Nat was impressed but also slightly overwhelmed. “Are you sure I can pull this off?”

“With my help, absolutely,” Wanda said confidently. “Let’s grab some fresh garlic and parsley too.”

They continued shopping, selecting the best ingredients. As Wanda picked up fresh tomatoes and heavy cream, Nat asked, “What are those for?”

“Homemade alfredo sauce. Trust me, it’s worth the effort,” Wanda explained, placing the items in the cart.

They made their way through the store, filling the cart with fresh basil, Parmesan cheese, and a bottle of white wine for the sauce. Nat’s mind was slightly more at ease as they checked off items from the list.

Once they had everything for the dinner, Nat wandered off to another section of the store, intent on picking up some of Y/N’s favorite things. She grabbed Oreos, her favorite chips, and some wine she knew Y/N loved among with other things.

As they checked out, Wanda looked at Nat curiously. “You really went all out with the extras.”

Nat smiled slightly. “I want to show her I’m thinking about her, not just with dinner, but in all the little things she loves.”

Wanda nodded approvingly. “That’s the right approach.”

After checking out, Wanda and Nat headed to the car to put up the groceries. Once they got into the car, Wanda gave her a reassuring smile. “Ready?”

Nat nodded, a mix of nerves and determination in her eyes. “Ready.”

As they drove back to Nat’s apartment, the weight of the evening ahead felt heavy but hopeful. Nat was prepared to do whatever it took to make things right, one step at a time.

Back at the apartment, Nat and Wanda unpacked the groceries. Nat carefully placed the fresh ingredients on the counter, feeling a mix of anticipation and anxiety. Wanda began to organize everything, setting out the flour, eggs, and olive oil for the pasta dough.

“Okay, first thing’s first,” Wanda said, tying an apron around her waist. “We’re going to make the pasta dough. It’s a bit messy, but it’s worth it.”

Nat nodded, following Wanda’s lead.

“Alright, Nat. Here’s how we make the pasta dough. First, make a hole in the center of the flour,” Wanda instructed, demonstrating with a mound of flour on the counter. “Then, we crack the eggs into it.”

Nat watched closely and imitated Wanda’s actions, cracking eggs into the flour. “Like this?”

“Perfect,” Wanda said with a nod. “Now, you gently beat the eggs with a fork, slowly incorporating the flour from the edges.”

Nat concentrated, her tongue peeking out slightly as she carefully mixed the eggs and flour. “This is harder than it looks.”

Wanda chuckled. “It takes practice, but you’re doing great. Keep going until it forms a dough.”

As the mixture began to come together, Nat used her hands to knead it into a smooth ball. Wanda added a bit of olive oil, showing Nat how to work it into the dough. “Now we knead. Press it with the heel of your hand, fold it over, and repeat.”

Nat followed Wanda’s movements, finding a rhythm in the repetitive motions. “How long do we knead it?”

“About ten minutes, until it’s smooth and elastic,” Wanda replied. “You’re doing really well, Nat.”

After the dough was ready, they wrapped it in plastic wrap and set it aside to rest. Next, Wanda guided Nat through preparing the shrimp. “First, we need to devein and clean these,” Wanda explained, showing Nat how to remove the shells and veins from the shrimp.

Nat mimicked her, quickly getting the hang of it. “This isn’t so bad.”

“See? You’ve got this,” Wanda encouraged. “Now, let’s season them with some salt, pepper.”

With the shrimp prepped, they moved on to the sauce. Wanda handed Nat a small knife and a clove of garlic.

Nat carefully chopped the garlic, as wanda prepared the pan with olive oil, waiting for Nat to finish. “Great job, Nat.”

After wanda put the garlic into the pan it wasn't long before the aroma of garlic filled the kitchen as it cooked.

Wanda added heavy cream and white wine to the pan, stirring gently. “We’re making the sauce now. Let it simmer and thicken.”

While the sauce simmered, Wanda brought out the pasta dough. “Time to roll out the pasta,” she said, grabbing a rolling pin. “Dust the counter with flour and roll the dough out thinly.”

Nat rolled out the dough, amazed at how it transformed. “This is actually fun.”

Wanda laughed. “Cooking can be therapeutic. Now, we’ll cut the dough into thin strips for the fettuccine.”

They used a sharp knife to cut the pasta into even strips, laying them out to dry slightly. Wanda checked the sauce, adding grated Parmesan cheese and fresh basil. “The sauce is almost ready. Just needs a bit more time.”

Once everything was prepped, Wanda and Nat cooked the pasta in boiling water, watching as it floated to the top. They drained it and added it to the creamy Alfredo sauce, tossing in the cooked shrimp.

After they put everything together in the pot, Wanda’s phone rang, pulling her attention away from their cooking. She glanced at the screen and her face grew serious. “Clint? What’s up?”

Natasha watched Wanda’s expression intently. After a brief conversation, Wanda nodded and ended the call. “Alright, I’ll be there soon.”

Wanda said washing her hands she turns her attention to nat "I have to go someone is trying to rob a bank across town"

"Do you need my help?"

"I think I can handel it but what I do need you to do is fix things with y/n".

“What am I gonna do without your help?” Nat asked, her worry evident.

“Relax, Nat,” Wanda said, giving her a reassuring smile. “Just let the food cook on low for the next 20 minutes.” She hurried to pull on her jacket. “Uh, I’ll send you the recipe for the garlic bread. It’s simple. Call Y/N and see what time she’ll be home.”

Natasha nodded, trying to absorb Wanda’s calmness. “Okay. I’ll handle it.”

Wanda squeezed Nat’s shoulder reassuringly before rushing out. Alone in the kitchen, Nat took a deep breath and began preheating the oven. She gave herself a pep talk, muttering, “You’ve got this. Finish dinner, make her happy, apologize, and talk. Be honest and open. Don’t push her away.” She grabbed her phone and dialed Y/N’s number.

The phone rang for about a minute until Y/N picked up. “Hello?”

“Hey, are you at work right now?” Nat asked, her heart pounding.

There was silence for about ten seconds before Y/N responded. “I’m just getting off and heading to the store. We ran out of eggs and flour, and I need to get something to cook for dinner.”

Nat smiled slightly. “I already went to the store and bought groceries for the week.”

“You did?” Y/N sounded surprised.

“Yes. When will you be home?”

“I guess I can be home in less than 15 minutes.”

“Great. I’ll see you in 15 minutes,” Nat says.

“Oh...okay,” Y/N replied, still sounding puzzled.

After hanging up, Nat started setting up the bed neatly, placing Y/N’s basket of treats and goodies with care. She then returned downstairs, set the oven to preheat, and nervously began preparing the ingredients for the garlic bread.

She heard the door open and close, followed by Y/N’s worried voice. “Nat?” ~

#natasha romanoff #natasha x you #natasha romanoff x reader #oneshot #avengers #g!p natasha #Fixing Us. Part4

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siriusblackloml · 1 year ago

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Day 4 - Neville Longbottom (Kinktober 2023)

𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 1500+

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: swearing, baby/babygirl nicknames, oral (male receiving), friends with benefits (MDNI 18+)

Kinktober 2023 Masterlist┊Day 5

“I’ve never had a blowjob before.” Neville shrugged as he laid in his bed, staring at the ceiling.

You knew the moment the words slipped from Neville’s mouth, you just had to be the one to change that for him. I mean, that’s what best friends were for, obviously.

Your jaw dropped at the shocking news. Unsure as to how this topic of conversation even began in the first place, the two of you were simply sharing stories about your different experiences with people. Intimate moments, to be more specific. Apparently Neville had very few experiences; not to say he was a complete virgin or anything. He’s been around with a couple girls, but these same girls were not ones to really go down on him in that way. He shared a quick story about both experiences just ending with something else rather than a blowjob. Which at the time he was fine with, but since then he’s just wished he’d finally meet someone who would want to give him one.

Neville had been your best friend at Hogwarts since day one. You guys were closer than ever and it was truly shocking that you hadn’t tried making a move on him before (especially since you’ve been secretly crushing on him for years). What was even more shocking is that you didn’t know this about your best friend until just before the two of you graduated. You’re just now finding out he’s never had a blowjob before? It just sounds crazy in your mind.

Which is why you can’t really help the words that fly out of your mouth next. You sit on the edge of his bed and throw out a suggestion, silently hoping for the best. You tell him, “I can give you one if you want.”

Neville immediately shot up from his position on the bed, eyes widened from shock as he stared at you. His mouth was agape, jaw practically dropped to the floor. Your heart starts to pound faster and faster, wondering if you had made the right decision for saying that.

You could practically feel the boy’s stare burning holes into your skull as he sat there motionless. Itching to break the ice, you shift awkwardly on the bed and mumble, “Um, sorry. I shouldn’t have-”

“Yes. Wait, no. Actually, yeah. I want it to be you.” Neville barely contains his excitement now, trying hard not to stutter over his words. He’s inching closer to you on the bed to close the gap. “Please, Y/N. I-I just..really want it.”

His pathetic begging has your cheeks blushing hard. The way he whimpers your name has you wet already. You absolutely loved seeing this side to Neville and were mentally beating yourself up for not trying to discover this at an earlier point. Before you can say anything else, Neville is standing up from the bed and pulling on your arms, encouraging you to stand as well. He mumbles quickly, “I just want to see you on your knees already, please.”

Your heart drops and you could have sworn all the air in your chest was sucked out of you the moment he said those words. As pitiful as he was acting, you couldn’t help but comply and get to your knees in front of your best friend. You smile hard at him, looking up through your thick eyelashes as you say, “Okay, Neville. But I can’t guarantee I’ll be any good.”

Of course, you knew that couldn't be further from the truth. But he would soon figure that out for himself.

There’s an obvious bulge forming in Neville’s trousers. Seeing it up close, just inches from your face, makes you subconsciously lick your bottom lip. You’d been fantasizing about this moment for what felt like a million years. Heart racing, you pull back your hair and tie it into a low bun. Neville’s hands leave his sides and pull loose strands from your face to tuck them behind your ear. You look up at him, cheeks still dusted red and lips parted as you silently take in the scene that was unfolding before you.

“Please, Y/N, I want your mouth around my cock already.” He murmurs, fingers tracing your jawline. Your stomach twists and turns at his words. You could have sworn you felt high just sitting there on your knees in front of Neville. How the hell did he have this kind of power over you?

Nodding your head, you gleefully chime, “I’ll make you feel so good, baby.”

Neville groans at the nickname and bites his bottom lip. His hands travel to the top of your head to hold onto your hair while your own make their way up his big thighs. The moment your fingertips have touched his zipper, your heart skips a beat at the feeling of his hardened girth poking underneath the fabric.

You practically need to take in a deep breath as you unzip the clothing, pulling down his trousers and underwear all at once. His length escapes the confines of his pants and immediately shoots out in front of your face. The angry tip of his cock nearly smacks your cheek and you gasp, gawking at the size. He was…massive, to say the least. You watch it twitch in anticipation against his hard abdomen, yearning to be touched.

“W-Wow, Neville…fuck, you’re huge.” You mumble, reaching up to hold onto his length.

He hisses at the contact, his fingers slowly tangling themselves into your locks. You bat your eyes slowly and look up at him with sultry eyes, making him nearly combust on the spot. He whines, “Please, please, please-”

You don’t want to tease him for too long. This was his first blowjob, after all. He needed stability through this whole experience and you were going to be there to give it to him. You place your tongue against his tip and swipe it back and forth for a moment before opening your mouth wide enough to fit him. As you bring the head of his length to your lips, it brushes across your lower lip before being drawn into your mouth almost instantly. It seemed as though you couldn’t control your excitement. The knot in your stomach tightens as you take in more and more of the boy’s massive girth.

Slowly engulfing his length, you listen to the way Neville lets out a moan at the sensation of your spit, tongue, and lips gripping his cock. You bob your head back and forth at a slow pace to take in the taste of his pre-cum on your tongue. You hum at the experience, listening to Neville whine as you push even further down his member. He lets out a loud whine, telling you in an exasperated tone, "Merlin's beard, Y/N, you're fucking amazing. Suck my cock, babygirl, keep going."

Your throat tightens at the sensation of him being so deep within your mouth, and you expand your jaw as much as you can to force yourself down even deeper onto him. Given the enormous girth that was steadily working its way down your throat, you were unable to muster the willpower to respond to any of his statements. You can't help but relish the moment, despite the searing feeling that itched your throat as his tip touched it.

His groans, the taste of his member, and the simultaneous unraveling feeling of your own body all came together to make you feel like you were in heaven on earth. As time passed, the familiar knot in your gut became larger and larger. You groan into his girth, causing Neville's body to tense up even more from the pure pleasure of having you suck him off. He immediately thrusts into your mouth with succession of hearing you moan again, spitting out multiple swear words in the process. “Fuck, fuck, fuck! Y/N, use that tongue, babygirl. Keep going, I’m so close!”

You bob your head faster and faster, feeling the head of his cock nearly bruise the back of your throat. Gurgled noises escape your mouth with every thrust and tears build up around both your eyes. You look up at Neville through your wet eyelashes, and the moment you both make eye contact, it’s enough to make the boy lose his mind.

“G-Gonna, fuck, gonna cum- AH! Fuck, holy shit…” Neville yells out as his seed sprays the back of your throat. You can feel the veins running up and down his length pump out more and more liquid into your mouth, smiling at the feeling of how great it made you feel. Your throat violently throbs as he slowly pulls himself out of your wet cavern, smirking at the way you looked so fucked out just from the large size of his member.

“Did I do a great job?” You ask Neville, licking your lips as you watch him tuck his member back into his pants.

Neville has to sit on the bed, clearly out of breath from the whole experience. He pulls some hair out of his face and smiles broadly. Looking down at his best friend on the floor, he nods his head, “Of course you did. Fuck, why haven’t I asked you to give me a blowjob before?”

You shrug your shoulders, telling him in a sassy tone, “Well now you know where to get one.”

He can’t help but laugh at the (very true) statement. You join in and giggle, ignoring the fact that this possibly breached every rule about being best friends with a boy.

TAGLIST: @calmspencer, @baddiebbarbietngz, @slytherclaw1978, @serendipitous-fernweh, @pandanation24, @rachelreallyroars, @tinafuentes, @chvmpion-jack, @ethereallovr, @godknows-shetried, @waggoth, @ellieswhor3, @wildestdreamers-tv, @faefaes-world, @the-bean-stocks

#kinktober #kinktober 2023 #kinktober harry potter #kinktober siriusblackloml #neville longbottom #neville longbottom smut #neville longbottom one shot #neville longbottom x reader #neville longbottom x y/n #neville longbottom x you

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sporadicmoontimemachine · 2 months ago

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Buddie realization earlier than expected? (Theory: looong)

Ok so what led me on this train of thought was bc I’ve been thinking about is the beginning of season 7 when Eddie is talking with Buck about Chris being a player. Eddie says “I don’t know where he gets it from, I married the first girl that I dated”. Fast forward to season 8 and bummy breakup and Turkish delight telling Buck that he’s his first and won’t be his last blah blah. Now let’s go to how Buck was ofc as usual ready to move in with Travel Agent and be serious. We’ve seen Buck from season 4 onward pushing to settle down and it was assumed that was bc of the Abby closure at the end of season 3 BUT…what if it’s not? What if it’s really a nod to Bucks need to be close to Eddie and in this sense I mean more mentally and theoretically.

Although Buck has seen Eddies relationships fall apart multiple times he has always tried to be like Eddie and establish “security” in a partner and eventually a family- something that he found in Eddie and Chris- but also really hasn’t bc Eddie has continually given up that spot that Buck unofficially holds as part of the Diaz family for years. However throughout the time Buck has known Eddie , the spot as Eddies best friend has been secured by him…until Trumpet. Once he was introduced Buck panicked(the first spot in Eddies life was already taken by Marisol and now there was competition for the other) so he did what he could to right the situation-remove Tourniquet from Eddies life himself. Buck found a willing substitute for Eddie while also ensuring that he would be Eddies secured first(bestie slash “platonic” life partner).

Back to the Eddie marrying his first and Torpedo saying that they can’t last BECAUSE he’s his first. I think at some point this is going to be brought up or referenced to, especially with the stills showing a depressed Buck. I think he has mentally seen Trombone being his first as something that relates to the validity of his relationship with Eddie. With him trying to emulate and fill the gap that not holding that “true” top spot in Eddies life and provide reason for why he should be okay being only Eddies bestfriend. Buck will at some point think well you married your first and overall it worked out great right(despite the divorce and her dying…)? You have your kid you got to experience the love etc. This is why despite multiple little(and not so little) references to Triste not being the one for him( the Evan Thing, “You wanted MY attention”, he’s good for you - how do you know that?, I gave you basketball tickets for our anniversary when you don’t like basketball, Do you love him?…, I led on the woman that changed your outlook on relationships and completely broke her heart), he still proceeds to ask Tommy to move in with him.

So then comes the question Why Buck? Why are you so heartbroken over this when you know deep down Trashcan was right? Because the whole thing was a product of his fear that he wont be important in eddies life forever. And from the articles Eddie is supposed to have a unique reaction to the breakup which I think is he is going to be completely care free about it in a “What can you do way”. This again will bring up Why do you care this much? Everyone else is moving on, you weren’t even this bad with Abby. I can totally see Buck having a meltdown about it. Another unique thing that hasn’t really happened before- Eddie is relatively free of emotional and mental weight atm while Buck is the complete opposite. Either both have been down bad or Buck was the free one and Eddie needed him. If Eddie reacts how I think in addition to everything else, this will be when Buck realizes what he truly wants from Eddie. Buck has always been there for him when the roles were reversed so Eddie not making it a priority will probably cause a I’m always there for him? Why is that and why am I so angry that he’s not as devastated as I am that our-I mean- me and Trampoline’s relationship didn’t work. This is all going to lead to Buck ending this episode or next episode with the realization that he has real romantic feelings for Eddie. BUTT I might just be way off and Eddie gets really protective and threatens Turnips life for not seeing how great Buck is and then asks Buck to marry him instead🙂.

Also this is probably hard to follow but it makes more sense in my head promise

#911 abc #buddie #evan buckley #911 speculation #911 season 8 #911 on abc #eddie diaz

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octoooo · 2 months ago

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HALLOWEEN AU BE UPON YE

Made this back in March but the latest Halloween art fits so well with this <3

It mostly focuses on witches & wizards and like

LOOK at that they practically made this for me (/j)

Anyway

WITCHES & WIZARDS!!

Witches don’t funnel magic through them/out a wand like wizards do, they’re able to perform similar spells through unconventional means and tend to be self-taught

There’s a school for wizards but not witchcraft so any wannabe-witches would have to find a self-taught witch and learn from them directly

The Tomioka’s run a potion shop as the only witches in town. Main floor is the shop & above that is their home, it’s on the outskirts of town closer to the forest

Their parents die before Tsutako finished training under them, so most things she learns after this point is self taught.

For the next several years Giyuu acts as her assistant <3

I’m still debating Tsutako’s role,,,,at some point she leaves the shop to either teach new witches the basics of potion making,,,,Or maybe she wanna do something else for a career & entrusts the shop to Giyuu. His interest & skill is close to surpassing her own so he’ll do just fine,,his communication skills could use some work but ehh

Her & Giyuu had been running the shop for a while—either way she’s moved to a different town but she visits Giyuu every now & then <3

In creating this au I’ve mostly focused on Sabito & Giyuu so I should get to them next;

GIYUU LIVES WITH 20 CROWS IN THAT SHOP

Tsutako has left by the time this happens but she Definitely notices the extra birds when she visits

Anyway the 20 crows—one is Kanzaburo of course. He usually sits on Giyuu’s shoulder or head during the day

The other crows come and go as they please but on any day there’s at least 4-5 in there

Witches can (but usually don’t) make themselves a familiar with soul magic that I haven’t fully figured out. While Kanzaburo is Giyuu’s familiar, he’s just a regular crow,,no soul magic required

(lil baby giyuu found him soaked in the rain and begged Tsutako to take him home, to which she hesitantly agreed. She didn’t expect Kanzaburo to become their pet but he did)

One night Kanzaburo got out the house :(

But Giyuu is busy solo-running the shop so he can’t spare too much time to search on foot. Instead he tried to attract him back with yummy bird food, but each day he checked/replaced the food there was a different non-Kanzaburo crow outside the shop.

He didn’t bother shooing them away, which might’ve been a mistake because 2 crows became 8 which became 12 and 15 and 19 and None of them were Kanzaburo still. Giyuu at this point is losing himself inside, but he has work to do so he can’t crumple yet

Some random day though Kanzaburo comes teetering through the open window and resettles himself on Giyuu’s shoulder as if he never left! like he didn’t age that man a decade from stress

After that week is over, Giyuu makes several roosts for the crows that keep returning to rest in. Sometimes they bring him shiny things which he keeps in a drawer. The crows stay out of his work space but may hop around any high shelves or caw at customers hehe

(The fact his shop is full of crows and their version of magic and witchery is associated with negativity & malicious intent doesn’t help his case. I’m sure he’s mistaken as some type of villain occasionally)

Sabito is going thru Wizard-Skool and his final graduation requirement is a work study, to which he chooses potion studies under a witch (Giyuu)

(Even though universities like Sabito’s don’t condone a witch’s me this of magic use, they can’t deny they’re more in touch w nature n shit so their skills are useful enough to allow very few work studies with them)

Because of the shop layout & distance from the school, Giyuu can provide Sabito with room & board in exchange for his work/help around the shop.

#<3 #think I covered enough..#for now at least #I shall return with ART #will think of better name later #hehehehehe fun au <3 #missed sharing my brainworms on umblr #if ur reading this get BOOPED #[1 million boops]#Sabito #tomioka giyuu #kny au #halloween #kny witchery au #kny #demon slayer #doodling for this au rn #wanted to draw their outfits fr but [family guy death pose] happened you know how it is #think I’m forgetting tags idk it’s been ages since I posted anything

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arealphrooblem · 1 year ago

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Kidnapped by the Boss Part 4

Sorry for the wait but surgery went well and I'm back!

Part one here

Synopsis: Civilian is a secretary to the Prime Minster. But when the political summit between the city states goes awry, she finds herself kidnapped by the very boss she tried to protect and nothing is what it seems.

I’ll take it under consideration he said. That was not a guarantee or even a promise. It was nothing. A deep paranoia settled in her bones. It chased her throughout the day and haunted her at night. No matter how still and quiet the room was, she felt watched. It made using the bathroom or taking a shower the most terrifying and nerve wracking experience of her life. She chased shadows in the room like a lunatic before she deemed it safe enough, but even then she never felt entirely alone.

And she was, on the surface. Servants delivered food, books, even a basket of yarn and crochet needles (strange that the Prime Min — the King remembered that silly detail of her life) and then disappeared. Neither the driver or the King made an appearance. It was if she was a toy stowed away in an attic and forgotten all about. It was infuriating, as was her restricted access to news, television, newspapers, anything to do with the world outside this room.

But the paranoia was worse. She didn’t sleep. She barely ate. She couldn’t read or crochet without having to get up and pace, like a lion in a zoo cage, strategizing for escape plans she didn’t dare enact for fear of her invisible guard.

By the time the driver did show up, in lieu of the servants who normally served her breakfast, Civilian’s sanity was in tatters. She must have looked insane because he set down the tray immediately and took hurried steps towards her. Panic jerked her backwards, stumbling over the coffee table leg until her back hit the wall. He followed after her, brow furrowed in a mockery of concern.

“Don’t touch me,” she snarled as he lifted his hand up.

He ignored her, pressing the back of his palm to her forehead. She slapped it away, glaring fiercely.

“What has gotten into you?” he demanded.

“As if you don’t know! As if you haven’t been skulking around here just so I can go insane from feeling watched all the time!”

“Skulking?” he barked out a laugh. “Is that what you think I’m doing? Just following you around invisible all day? Like I have nothing better to do?”

Anger ignited, burning up her panic like kerosene. She shoved him with all the force she could muster, sending him stumbling back.

“And how would I know that you’re not? How am I ever supposed to know I’m actually alone when I shower or sleep? You could attack me at any moment and I would never see it! I’ve lived with that fear for days and it's not funny!”

She was yelling by the end of it, her voice ringing in the empty room. The driver looked bewildered in the face of it and she was too angry to be satisfied with it. Her throat tightened with tears of fury and she desperately bit the back. She refused to cry in front of him.

For a long moment the driver studied her, his face carefully neutral and impassive, as she struggled to get her breathing back in check. Then he rose his hands up, palms out, in surrender.

“I have not been here since you last saw me,” he said slowly. “You have been alone this entire time.”

“You expect me to take you at your word that that’s true?” she asked. Even still, the tension in her shoulders relaxed.

“No. It would be stupid to trust me. But my king — for whatever reason — is very fond of you. He entrusts your protection to me and he didn’t do it so I could psychologically torment you. If you can’t trust my word, then trust his.”

She snorted. “He’s so fond of me that he locks me away in this room like a doll and never speaks to me.”

“We’ve been a little busy,” the driver snapped. “Plans that have been in place for years are finally moving forward. You were not supposed to be here.”

A pit started forming in her stomach. “What plans?”

“An excellent question. One you can ask the king. Today.”

She stared at him. “Today? Today? When?”

“Now. That’s why I’m here — to escort you.” He said this last part with a twist of bitterness, as if such a task lay beneath his skill set. Which it probably did.

“I can’t go now.” New panic flared up. “I’m not ready!”

He laughed again. “Why not — are you busy? Come on.”

She looked down at her rumpled shirt and leggings. The servants had brought her soft, stretchy clothes that didn’t need exact sizing. “But I look —“

“—Like shit?” he finished. “Yeah. That’s what you get when you don’t sleep or eat. He has breakfast waiting and you can take a nap after.”

“If he’s the king, don’t I need to look presentable?”

“If you were anybody else. With you he doesn’t care. What he does care about is punctuality. So let’s go.”

With a firm hand on the small of her back, the driver guided her out firmly from the bedroom. Civilian smoothed her shirt out as best she could and pulled her hair up into a ponytail. While she had seen the King in robe and pajamas many times, he had never seen her in anything less than perfect professionalism.

The halls of the palace were old and ornate, with lush carpet and intricate crown molding and silk wallpaper. It shared few similarities with the sleek modern buildings of her parliament. Save for her clothes, Civilian felt like she’d stepped inside a fairy tale.

The driver led her through a confusing route of sharp turns and side doors and little staircases, keeping the layout of the castle a complete maze despite her trying desperately to remember her bearings. Finally they passed through a door that led her out into a walled garden.

Flowers in red, gold, and purple bloomed everywhere in immaculately manicured beds. Underneath a huge tree, a table was set up with three chairs and a generous breakfast spread. The King sat, spreading jam on a scone. To her relief he was dressed in soft pants and a sleep shirt. His hair looked slightly rumpled on one side and her heart squeezed at the painful familiarity of it all.

“Good morning,” he said cheerfully, as if she had just stepped into his hotel room to badger him into getting dressed. Like she had done so many times.

Her feet dug into the ground, out of instinct, afraid of this mockery of their past relationship. The driver spread his hand over the middle of her back, thumb digging in the muscle as a warning. She walked to an empty chair and sat down, inwardly fuming.

The King’s happy grin faded as he took a closer look at her. Lines furrowed on his forehead and his eyes flickered over to the driver, his gaze suddenly cold and terrifying.

“It’s been handled,” the driver murmured, looking impressively stoic underneath that gaze.

When the King turned back towards her, his expression smoothed out into the warmth she was accustomed to. It hurt to know that it wasn’t real, that he thought he could fool her by wearing the same mask he did as prime minister. She channeled the driver’s apathy in her own gaze.

“Are you hungry? I have all your favorites,” the King said, gesturing to the table.

Her stomach growled, her hunger suddenly ravenous. But she clenched her fists in her lap and resisted.

“What do you want?” she asked instead.

“For you to eat. There’s peach marmalade, soft boiled eggs, avocado, sourdough. Scones.”

He took a bite out of his rather pointedly. She crossed her arms and glared just as pointedly. Hiding under her panic and fear and exhaustion was the steel backbone that made her hustle the Prime Minister to his meetings and events when he got distracted by every phone and television in his vicinity.

“I’m not going to be fooled with this fake version of yourself just because it's familiar. I’m not playing games, sir.”

He said nothing, turning his attention to spreading avocado on a slice of sourdough toast. Then he put it on a plate and held it up to her across the table. The gentle kindness from his eyes slid away, replaced with a stubborn, firm gaze.

“I’m not playing games either, Civilian. You’re not well and you’re going to fall ill so you are going to eat this before we discuss your future. Is that clear?”

Never had Civilian seen him so assertive. The Prime Minister phrased commands as requests and backed them up with a smile and doe eyes that few found easy to deny. Now those dark eyes looked at her with the command of a predator.

She dared a glance to the driver, who flickered his eyes to the plate as if to say, I’d eat if I were you.

Civilian snatched the plate from the King and took one muleish bite. It was delicious. Of course it was. As basic as it made her sound, she loved simple salted avocado on toast. She didn’t want to eat because she thought it would be horrible. But the list of things she had control over grew shorter and shorter each day.

Like the clouds breaking on a dark day, the warmth came back to the King’s eyes. “Good girl. You’ll need your strength so keep eating. Meanwhile, I feel like I should start this with an apology.”

Civilian almost choked on her toast.

“I had no intention of leaving you in that room for four days. I can see the toll it has taken on you.” Once again, his gaze flickered to the driver, as if laying the blame at his feet. “You were a . . .surprise in our plans. And once we had put them into motion we couldn’t stop until certain things were done. I put you someplace safe and out of the way. I should have checked up on you sooner.”

“I’m fine,” she bit out. “I don’t need you to check up on me. I need you to take me home.”

He raised an eyebrow at that. “As usual, your definition and my definition of fine vastly differs. But getting you home . . . that can certainly be arranged. However, I need you to make an informed decision and you have missed some crucial developments during your detainment.”

Her heart rose and crashed. Hope hung on a terrifyingly delicate thread.

"What crucial developments," she asked, a pit forming in her stomach.

The King leaned back in his chair, his gaze narrowed and business-like.

"First, we must establish that, due to your stubborn recklessness, your absence is tied to mine. In the eyes of your country, our ambitions, decisions, and loyalties are tied together."

Your country. As if he hadn't helped to run it for the last five years. As if he had no connection or loyalty to a place he had defended and cared for. It chilled her.

"What does that matter?" she asked. "We were always viewed like that. I worked for you."

Worked. Past tense. She realizes that technically she's out of a job now. Does this situation even qualify for unemployment?

"Yes, that's true. And that relationship will be to your detriment when I invade your country."

The words didn't make sense at first, almost as if her brain refused to process it. And then when the meaning became undeniable, it felt like he had sucked the air from the courtyard. The King continued on, either oblivious to her shock or ignoring it.

"I imagine they will pull you in for questioning when you first return and then arrest you when I invade. You can protest your innocence as much as you like, but I doubt they'd believe you. You ran straight to me during the attack at the summit, after all. They will think you a treasonous spy and they will imprison you indefinitely if you're lucky and execute you if you're not. After all, your absence thus far looks terribly guilty."

The sounds of the garden faded as a dull roar thundered in her ears. All the pieces started convalescing together and it made her feel faint.

"You did this on purpose," she said, head swimming. "You kept me here long enough to make me look like a traitor so I can't go back."

"Of course you can go back, Civilian. I'm not going to force you to stay here."

"Would you let me leave and tell everyone your plans?"

He smirked. "And what are my plans? What details could you give away? You know nothing and you have no proof."

The truth of that hit her like a kick to the chest. He made sure to imprison her in every way that counts. Suddenly her throat felt tight and breath came in light and restricted. The King cocked his head to the side, brow furrowed. His gaze flickered to the driver.

"Civilian looks ill. Perhaps you should take her back to her quarters."

He sounded muffled and far away. The driver guided her out of the chair and she let him, feeling dazed and dizzy. The walk back to her quarters passed in a hazy blur. She was grateful for the firm and guiding hand on her back through the maze of corridors. Just as she was grateful for the shut of the door behind her when she finally made it.

Civilian collapsed to her knees on the lush carpet and sobbed, uncaring of any invisible watchers.

Part five here

Taglist: @rivalriotrenegade @sunyside-world @fishtale88 @those-damn-snippets @suspiciousmuffin @thats-alittle-gay @girl-of-the-sea-and-stars

#hero x villain #heroine x villain #my writing #enemies to lovers #kidnapped by the boss #villain x civilian #fantasci tumblr #writeblr

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writing-blog-iguess · 1 year ago

Text

Online Matchup 3

Summery: Y/N just wanted to study and head home for some sleep, to bad the night in Gotham has different plans. Now all they want to do is see the one person who's been on their mind since they started talking. Question is, will Jason agree?

Warning: swearing, fluff, it gets a little angsty, comfort, a sprinkle of gun violence, a mugging.

A/N: I got it done by Friday. I did not think I could do it, but I did. I’m not sure part 4 will be up, but I will be taking the next week to try and finish other projects. If there’s anything you’d like to, let me know. Uh, this ended up being over 6k works, I hope you enjoy! Feedback is welcome.

Words: 6574

ao3

Series master list

————

October 7

Y/N (7:30 am) Why is it so cold?

Jason Because it’s october

Y/N October just started! It should be illegal for October to be so cold so soon

Jason You’re the one who wanted to live in Gotham

Y/N I know But still

Jason: You lived in Gotham for how many years?

Y/n … Three

Jason: And you're still not used to the cold? and to think you chose Gotham

Y/n Shut up

Jason All because Gotham and I quote ~intrigues~ you

Y/n Shouldn’t you be at work?

Jason Shouldn’t you be in class?

Y/n I’m on my way there Why’d you think I’m complaining about the cold?

Jason Could have fooled me Maybe your heater broke in your apartment and it’s freezing

Y/n I would cry if that happened

Jason Don’t like the cold?

Y/n I don’t like getting sick

Jason Touché

Y/n But I also hate the cold

Jason It’s sweater weather

Y/n Still cold

Jason Fall is not cold Winters cold Fall is the perfect season It’s not too cold not to hot Perfect

Y/n Maybe for cuddling under the blanket and read

Jason That an invitation?

Y/n Wouldn’t you like to know

Jason Awe come on, little bird don’t shy on me now It’s been what? Three weeks?

Y/n Yeah But, uh I’m a little nervous It’s been a while since I’ve been on a date or something

Jason Ah I get that Honestly me too We can wait a bit longer and when we do meet up it’ll been in a public place

Y/n The confidence you have that we will be meeting is showing

Jason What can I say? I’m falling and I can’t get up

Y/n Oh my god You ruined the moment

Jason ‘Twas the plan

Y/n You dork

Jason No but really I really did fall and now my ass hurts

Y/n What do you want me to do about it?

Jason Come kiss it better

Y/n In your dreams

Jason Every night

Y/n I hope you step on a Lego

Jason First my ass and now my heart? Y/n you wound me

Y/n Sure, we’ll pretend your not into it

Jason I- Okay wow

Y/n Am I wrong

Jason I plead the fifth

Y/n Mm thought so

Jason Shouldn’t you be in class?

Y/N Yup, just waiting for the professor

Jason Is it true that if the teacher isn’t there after a certain period of time that there’s no class?

Y/n Some people think it is but no They always end up coming to class Unless there’s an attack of the school or something

Jason Does that happen a lot?

Y/n Like maybe every few months Don’t quote me on that, I barely pay attention

Jason I think that’s something you sure pay attention too

Y/n I did when I first moved here and now I just roll with the punches

Jason I really hope not

Y/n Like my guard is up when I’m out but other than that I guess, I don’t care?

Jason That’s even worse

Y/n That’s what my mom said too Oh look, the teach is here

Jason I'm more worried about you then I have worried about someone in my life

Y/n (12:20 pm) Hey You keep up with the news right?

Jason When I have time Why?

Y/n Have you heard anything about college students going missing?

Jason No I don’t think I have

Y/n Mm, not surprised I guess Apparently it’s a recent thing

Jason How recent?

Y/N Um, like a few days ago?

Jason And the cops haven’t done anything about this?

Y/N Nope Said they probably dropped out Some tried to report them as missing But they haven’t looked into it much

Jason How do you know this?

Y/n Rumors mostly Guess that’s why the cops won’t do anything But I don’t think they’re rumors I know some of the students that are missing Most are on the top of their classes Some are scholarship students, they wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize it

Jason Damn My brother’s a cop, I could get him to look into it?

Y/n You’re brothers a cop in Bludhaven What do you think he can do in Gotham?

Jason How do you know that?

Y/N Jason, we’ve been talking for awhile And sometimes when you complain about your brothers, you let information slip past. Not that I mind, everything you tell me I keep to myself But you need to pay more attention to what you’re talking about

Jason Right, sorry I forgot about that

Y/N Have you been sleeping lately?

Jason …no

Y/n Everything okay? Er, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to it’s fine

Jason No it’s okay I want to tell you I just don’t know where to start

Y/n Start wherever, and how much you want to tell me I don’t need the whole picture

Jason I guess I’ve been having nightmares lately

Y/n About when you died? Allegedly

Jason … Don’t know if I should be impressed that that’s where your mind jumps to or not

Y/n It’s a gift

Jason But yeah, that’s what they’re about Someone found me after, and took me in and raised me for a couple of years And then coming going back home It’s a lot I guess Sometimes I feel like I’m broken

Y/n I bet I’m not going to pretend that I know how you feel and I’m not sure what exactly what I can say And I don’t want to invalid your feels, you’re allowed to feel how you feel But you’re not broken, not completely anyways Maybe a little bruised and banged up And like any bruise, they heal with time Sometimes with help sometimes without All depends on if you want it or not

Jason Are you sure you’re not a shrink or something?

Y/N Pretty positive It’s something my mom told me sometimes

Jason Wise women

Y/n You have no idea So, if you ever want to talk, chances are that I’ll be awake at any time

Jason Thank you And as for what Dick could do? Not a whole lot, but he does have friends in the gcpd though

Y/n You think he can do that?

Jason Yeah, he owes me

Y/N He’s your brother Does he have to owe you?

Jason Our relationship is a bit complicated

Y/N You’ve mentioned But if he can do something, that puts my mind at ease a little I’m worried and maybe a little scared

Jason As you should Just be careful okay?

Y/n I will do my best

Y/n (11:30pm) So… Have you heard anything from your brother?

Jason Smooth It hasn’t even been a day

Y/n That’s me The ruler of smooth A lot can happen between now and when you talked to your brother about it

Jason All true you dork And yeah I have Turns out they aren’t just rumours He went to check out the students dorms are they left everything there Usually when someone leaves they bring some clothes and stuff with them right

Y/n Yeah, unless they were in a hurried and couldn’t care less then they would pack important stuff

Jason Yeah but they left everything there Phones, wallets, keys I’m not sure what the connection is and all that But the cops are working hard

Y/n Mm okay At least some things being done about it

Jason Mm

Y/n No sleep tonight?

Jason Not yet Helping my brother with something

Y/n You know, for someone who has a complicated relationship with one’s family You sure do help them a lot

Jason What can I say? I’m a family man

Y/N Is this your way of saying you love your family?

Jason So how’s your dad doing?

Y/N I cannot believe you pulled the same move I used on you, on me This is a disgrace Unacceptable

Jason I’m just using when you taught me

Y/N I didn’t teach you shit

Jason Well it worked, didn’t it?

Y/n Unbelievable

Jason Answer the question

Y/n Okay I guess Tired mostly Says he’s trying to keep busy but my mom tells me he gets tired easily There’s no win win

Jason I’m sorry

Y/n Yup

Jason Still repressing your emotions?

Y/N You know it

Jason I’m here if you want to talk

Y/N Thanks Jason That means a lot

Jason Shouldn’t you be sleeping?

Y/N Yes But I’m currently doing a project that’s due tomorrow

Jason Ouch

Y/N Did you know that the library I’m at is open this late?

Jason Why?

Y/N College students needs books

Jason Yes But you can take them out and bring them home

Y/N I left my library card at home so now I’m stuck here with the book I need until I’m done

Jason See, I want to feel sorry for you But something’s holding me back

Y/N I can see the compassion from here Anyways I should go home soon

—

My phone’s about to die and I don’t have my charger either, you typed out and before you could hit send, you were met with your reflection on a black screen. “No,” you whined, slumping back into your chair. “It’s fine. I’ll just use my laptop, it should work.”

Sitting up straight, you reached over to wake your computer up, you were met with the same fate as your phone. “No, nonono,” you muttered, frantically searching your backpack for your laptop charger. When you couldn’t find it, you dumped everything on the table, hoping you were just blind. But it wasn’t there.

You groaned when you came to the realization that luck wasn’t on your side tonight.

Sighing in defeat, you made a note of the books you were using and the pages before cleaning up the table. As you stuffed your backpack with your things, you took a quick glance at the clock on the wall and cursed. If you don't hurry now, you’ll be late for the last train for the night.

If there’s one thing you hated most about Gotham, it was walking home really late at night. And the last you wanted to do was that, also you didn’t want to make Jason worry.

With the rest of your stuff hazardously stuffed into the backpack, you raced out of the library hoping to make the last train.

—

Jason You good? Home yet? Is everything okay? Hellooo? What happened? Are you safe?

—

Nothing. There was no response and when Jason tried to call you, it went straight to voicemail. No matter how many times he called, it always yielded the same result.

Jason is not worried. He knows you're busy with your project. Maybe you misplaced your phone while talking to someone. Or you’re already on your way home and need to concentrate on getting home. He vaguely recalls you saying you take the train to and from school.

Lighting up his phone to check the time, he nodded to himself. Yeah, that was it. You were just busy and on your way home. Jason’s not worried, he’s not.

“You okay there Jay?” Dick asked in concern, “you look a little worried there.”

Okay, so maybe he’s a little worried and maybe a little scared of what could potentially happen. In Gotham…At night.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Jason lied, trying to push images of you hurt away. It didn’t help that there was this group out there kidnapping college students. For what, who knows. Jason only hoped that you didn’t get mixed up in it.

Dick leaned in front of him and poked Jason’s forehead. “Are you sure? Your brow is pinched like you ate something sour,” he commented and Jason pushed him away with a scowl.

“Maybe he’s worried about his new friend,” Tim sang from the Bat computer. “It’s awfully late for a college student to be out in Gotham.”

Jason whipped his head around so fast, he was surprised he didn’t get whiplash. “How the fuck do you know?! I haven’t told you shit.”

“I’m a detective, Jason, I detect,” Tim pointily said, pressing buttons on the keyboard before a file with pictures of you showed on the screen. “Gotta say, they are kinda cute.”

“Why are you spying on them?” Jason asked, trying to keep his voice even. He was pissed he couldn’t have something in his life to himself. But his nosey siblings had to meddle in his life, love life too. It's like they have no life outside of fighting crime.

“I was bored,” he replied as Dick made his way over to the computer. No doubt curious on what Tim found.

“Don’t you have cases to solve?”

Tim shrugged, clicking through photos of you, which only served to piss Jason off even more. Why is it that he wanted to slowly get to learn more about you, that his brothers decided to do a deep dive without his permission? Times like these made him wish he stayed dead. “Your love life is more interesting at the moment.”

“Well, you can fuck off then,” he said, grabbing his Red Hood helmet from the nearby table and put it on.

“Where are you going?” Dick called over the roar of Jason’s motorcycle.

“Anywhere that’s not here,” he answered and sped off.

He had meant to drive aimlessly, but soon he found his way towards the library you were currently studying in.

He couldn’t get the images of you hurt out of his mind, and he convinced himself that it was fine to make sure you were okay. Otherwise, he’d be drowning in worry.

As he drove, he heard a cry for help. He almost dismissed it, thinking that someone who was on patrol would help them. But with his bike in idle, he heard it. Granted, the last time he heard your voice, you were all nasally with a hoarse voice from a sore throat. But he recognized you’re voice anywhere.

Parking his bike, he unholstered his gun and slowly made his way to the alley that your voice came from. Peeking his head around the corner, he saw you fighting with someone over your backpack. You held your own for a while, and Jason could only wait until there was an opening.

Was there a little part of him that wanted to see you fight? Maybe. but he doesn’t want to think about that now.

“Let go you asshole,” you grunted, pulling your backpack hard enough that the mugger tripped forward. Which gave you the time to kick him in the balls, hard. Jason winced at the impact and the mugger staggered backwards with a groan and you successfully gained back your bag. “Ha!”

“You bitch!” he yelled and lunged towards you. But before either of you could do anything, Jason surged forward and shot him in the leg. The both of you screamed, you at the sudden noise and the mugger at the pain. Without looking to see who was there, you ducked behind a dumpster, out of harms way.

Clever Little Bird, Jason thought as he stalked towards his prey. “Your mom ever teach you manners?” Jason asked. The mugger shook his head and begged Jason not to kill him. Jason was tempted too, but an annoying voice in the back of his mind, who sounded suspiciously like Bruce, whispered, don’t kill.

“Nah, I’m not gonna kill ya,” he grumbled and waved him away with his gun. “But if I see ya again, I ain’t making any promises.” He took it as it was, and limped away as fast as he could. Jason watched as he disappeared before holstering his gun and turned around towards you with a frown. You were curled in on yourself, hugging your bag tight.

“Hey,” he said softly, reaching out to tap you on your shoulders. With no warning, you quickly spun around and hit him with your bag. He winced as it collided with his chest, surprising him.

“Oh my god!” you exclaimed once you realized who he was. You dropped your arms from the next attack Jason had no doubt would have followed through. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize it was you.”

“What are you packing in there?” he grunted as he rubbed his chest, “fucking bricks?”

“Textbooks,” you answered sheepishly, hugging your backpack to your chest. “I’m really sorry I thought you were someone else.”

“No worries, I ain’t mad,” he said with a smile. Though you couldn’t see it given the helmet. “Hellva reflex though. Not many would fight back.”

You shrugged, tightening your grip on the backpack. The adrenaline must be wearing off, Jason noted. You were starting to shake. “What can I say? My flight or fight kicked in and there was nowhere to run.”

“Still,” he said, taking the moment to study you, and wishing he had shot the punk when he clocked the bruise forming under your eye. Other than that, there was nothing of note to worry about. Physically at least. Emotionally, he had no idea where your mind was at. “Are you doing okay?”

“Uh maybe?” you said, unsure yourself. You took a deep breath to calm yourself but it came out shakily. “I don’t know. I will be, once I’m home though.”

“Need a lift?” Jason offered, catching you by surprise. You lifted your head to look at him, eyes narrowed. As if you were trying to see under the helmet. He stood there and waited. Eventually, you shook your head. Disappointment filtered through Jason but he pushed it down.

“Thanks, but I’m just down the street. Don’t think anything else can happen between here and there,” you said and Jason’s heart leaped at all the possibilities of what could happen.

“You’re gonna jinx yourself if you keep saying stuff like that,” he pointed out. You only shrugged and gave him a smile that made his heart skip a beat.

“I’m sure an angel is looking out for me,” you said, getting enough courage to pat him on the chest as you walked past him. “Be seeing ya, Red.”

Jason stood there for a moment and shook his head with a smile. You sure were something else. Though it was a short distance to your place, it didn’t stop Red Hood from following you until you made it to your apartment. Even then, he stayed on the roof adjacent to your building, waiting for your message saying you were okay.

You stood in front of your apartment door, keys in hand and frowned. With the adrenaline completely out of your system, and finally being alone, your mind raced with the events that transpired over the last couple of hours.

You had managed to make the last train and the journey was uneventful. It wasn’t until the walk home that your luck turned bad.

You were so focused on getting home that you didn’t notice the guy following you until he grabbed your backpack. You fought, Red Hood showered up surprising you and talked before going home.

You blinked at the memory. If you weren’t so in your head, you’d be giddy that you actually talked to Red Hood. You talked to Red Hood. What the fuck? You’re not even sure if you flirted with him near the end or not. But you were still processing everything.

You shook your head, trying to get out of it. You didn’t want to go inside. Going inside meant being alone, alone with your thoughts and that’s the last thing you wanted.

What you wanted was company, what you wanted was someone you haven’t even met yet, yet you knew you’d feel better after seeing him. You wondered if you called Jason, if he would pick up and ask to meet up. It couldn’t hurt to try.

With a half-baked plan, you finally unlocked the door. The first thing you do is plug in your phone, the second is to shower.

You wanted it to be quick, the faster you're done the faster you can leave the apartment. But you’re not sure what happened between grabbing your clothes and now. You just know that when you come to, your hair is wet and dressed in your comfortable clothes, and you find yourself standing in front of the mirror.

You feel better, if only a little. You wince at the bruise and you could cover it up, but you’re tired and you don’t want to stay here any longer than you already have. Instead, you bushed your hair and leave the bathroom.

With your phone half charged, you grab it and your keys and wallet before leaving the apartment. As you walk towards the elevator, you open up your phone to see a few missed calls from your sister and Jason, and some texts from Jason asking if you’re okay. You made a note to call your sister in the morning and tried to ignore the guilt at seeing the messages from Jason. You pressed the button for the elevator, your thumb hovering over Jason’s name.

Maybe calling him will be a mistake, Despair whispered in your ear.

Or, maybe it’ll be the best thing in the world and you won’t regret it, Desire countered. And hope bloomed a little in your chest. With that, you pressed the call button without much thought and brought the phone to your ear.

One ring, you step in the elevator as you begin to second guess yourself that this was a bad idea. Second ring, you press the button for the lobby, starting to panic. Maybe he won’t pick up. Half of you hoped. By the third ring, you're off the elevator and almost hung up when the call connects.

“Little Bird?” Jason answered, and the grip on the phone tightened. You really didn’t think he’d pick up, and he doesn’t sound tired. For how late it is, anyways. If anything, he sounds awake, like he was waiting for something.

Guilt rears back into your stomach again when you realize he was waiting for you. Tears start to pool in the corner of your eyes, and you blink them away. You didn’t want to cry, that was for later, when you're curled up in a ball in bed. Waiting for sleep that you know will never come.

“Hey, you still there?” Jason asked, voice soft as if he knew that’s what you needed right now. Your heart warms at the person you’re slowly falling for. You clear your throat and hope your voice sounds normal when you answer.

“Hi,” your answer is a whisper, and you find yourself you don’t care.

“Hi,” he greeted back and you could hear the smile in his voice. “I’m surprised you're still awake. Figured you’d be in bed by now.”

"Yeah, me too. But I’m too wired to sleep,” you said, forcing your feet to move. You start walking out of the building and towards your favourite café that’s near your place. “Surprised you’re awake too. Still helping your brother?”

You’re so engrossed with your conversation, that you don’t feel eyes on you as you walk. And Jason hoped to keep it that way. “Nah, doing my own thing before going to bed. Surprised you called though. Usually, you shoot me a message.”

You stall for a moment, almost tripping on your feet, before walking again. “Er, yeah. Sorry I just…I don’t know.”

“You don’t have to say sorry. I don’t mind talking either. Besides, you've voice is music to my ears," Jason said, and you try not the blush with how casual he says things like that. "So, what’s up?”

You’re quiet for a second, chewing on your lip before blurting out the question, “do you want to meet up?”

You’re met with and you close your eyes at your stupidity. “Sorry,” you started, “that was stupid. You don’t have to if you don’t want to, I get it. It’s fine. Plus, it’s super late, like two in the morning late. And we should be sleeping but the thought of being alone right now scares me. And I don’t want to be alone and I just really need some company. And I thought why not Jason? I wanted to meet him for awhile and I’ve now realized it was bad timing and-”

“Are you sure?” Jason interrupted your rambling and you couldn’t be more thankful. You were positive you would big yourself in a hole you couldn’t get out of if you kept talking.

“Sure about what?” you asked dumbly, as if you forgot what you had just asked him. You’ve reached the café and stood in front of the door, peering in.

“That you want to meet up,” Jason said with a chuckle.

“Oh, uh yeah, I am sure,” you said with a nod. “I mean if that’s okay with you?”

“Sure is,” he said, “can I ask what brought this on?”

You're silent for a moment, debating whether to answer him or wait until he’s here to say. But you think of the bruise under your eye and you think it’s better to tell him now. “I, um, almost got mugged on my way home. He didn’t get my stuff, but he did clock me in the face. Could be worse though, but I don’t want to be alone right now.”

“Shit,” he breathed out, “are you okay?”

“Sorry,” you mumbled to the couple coming out of the café and stepped aside to let them go. You shrug even though he couldn’t see you. “Like I said, it could be worse.”

“Don’t. Don’t downplay what happened to you,” Jason said softly, “anyone would be shaken up after a mugging. You’re allowed to not be okay, sweetheart.”

The simple sentence is what breaks you, and you start letting the tears fall down your cheeks. “Damnit,” you mumbled, wiping your eyes with the sleeve of your sweater. “Have me crying in public Jason, not cool.”

“Sorry sweetie. Where are you? I’ll get there as soon as I can.” You rattle where you are and you can feel Jason’s smile through the phone. “I know the place. Order me a hot chocolate and I’ll be there in twenty.”

“Try not to break any laws now, Jason,” you muttered, though you smile all the same. Knowing you’ll meet Jason soon has you in better spirits since the incident happened.

“No promises.” With that, you hang up and walk into the building. You tell the barista your fine when she asks about the bruise and order your usual and Jason’s drink with a cake and find an empty table. You find yourself in the corner by a window, making your way over and you set your order down and sit facing the door.

You’re scrolling through your phone while you wait, trying to keep yourself distracted. And it helped with Jason texting you updates on what’s happening. You find it endearing, and a little silly, but it keeps you from spiraling and you're thankful.

Before you know it, you hear a roar of a motorcycle driving past, and you look up just in time to see them part in front of the building. You watch as they turn off the bike and climb off before taking the helmet off.

Breath escapes you as you recognize who it is, and pictures didn’t do Jason justice. Jason’s pretty, and you like the little white strip he has in his hair. It suits him, somehow.

Lifting your phone, you take a picture of him fluffing out his hair and type out a message saying you see him before sending it to him. You watch as he takes out his phone, frowning a little at the message. He whipped his head up and scanned the building until his eyes landed on you. All you can do is wave, and your heart almost leaps out of your chest at the smile he gives you.

It's brighter than you imagined and you're okay with it. Your eyes follow him as he makes his way inside. You stand when he makes his way towards you and you smile as he stands in front of you.

“Hi.”

There’s a moment of silence between the two of you before you start to laugh. Not a full belly laugh, just a light chuckle as if someone told you a joke. You’re not sure why you find the whole thing funny, but you do. Maybe you're too tired to fully process it completely.

“Are you okay?” Jason asked, a little worried. He took a step forward, arms moving to give you a hug, but stopped himself. Worried that you wouldn’t appreciate the gesture, scared that you might reject his touch. Your heart warms at the hesitation and you make the decision for him. Stepping forward, you wrap your arms around him and practically met into his chest.

After a moment of hesitation, Jason wraps his arms around you, hugging you tight. It's one of the best hugs you’ve ever had, and you can't seem to remember the last time someone hugged you that wasn’t family.

“I am now,” you whispered, blinking away more tears. “Sorry if this first meeting isn’t exactly to your expectations.”

“Nah, I wouldn’t change this for the world,” he said, leaning back a little. Snaking one hand to your chin, he gently lifted your face to look at you. He hissed a little at the bruising and you can’t seem to find yourself to be embarrassed about. Not with the look Jason’s giving you, like you’re the only person who matters to him.

“That’s good,” you mumbled, blushing a little with the attention he was giving you. You pull away a little, only to pull him to sit down. Your feet started to hurt and you needed to let them rest. Sitting across from him, you wrap your hands around your cup and let the heat seep into them. “You know, I almost didn’t call. Was too afraid you’d say no or something.”

Jason leaned over a bit and took off his jacket and you tried to not openly stare at his arms.

“Don’t think I could say no to you,” Jason said, taking a sip from his drink as you averted your gaze to his face. “But I’m glad you called, I was trying to work up the nerve to ask you to a coffee date or something. Something always stopped me though.”

“Well, we’re here now,” you pointed out, leaning over the table with a smile. “Nothing we can do but move forward.”

“Wise words coming from a lady who thought I was asking for a booty call,” Jason said with a smirk. You gasped at the reminder, and reached over to pull the plate of cake you had bought to share with him.

“You know, just for that, I’m not sharing this with you,” you said, and moved the plate closer when Jason moved to grab it.

“Now that’s not fair, Little Bird. It’s been a tough night dealing with my brothers all night, I need a little pick me up,” he said, trying to grab the plate from you again. You moved it just before he could grab it, and stuck your nose in the air.

“Guess you should have thought about that before insulting me, good sir.” Jason snorted, mock surrendering. You giggled and moved the plate back to the middle. “How was your night? Anything interesting happen?”

“Nah, not really. Turned out he didn’t really need my help, just said that to rope me in for family supper,” Jason answered, picking up the fork and stabbing a piece of cake before eating it.

“If you’re gonna be mean to the cake, I won’t share,” you threatened, trying not to smile when he gave you a look. “Family dinner huh? Can’t be all that bad.”

“It’s not,” Jason hummed, “I get to eat Alfred’s cooking and there are some siblings I don’t mind hanging out with. It can be too much sometimes, you know? Like they lived their lives while I was somewhere out there being raised by different people, you know?”

“Mm not really but I can imagine,” you said, smiling when he snorted. “But they’re trying, that’s all you can ask for. Question is though, are you trying?”

Jason shifted as you stared at him with raised eyebrows. “What is this? An interrogation?”

“Can be if you want it to be,” you quipped back. Following his lead as he leaned forward.

“If anyone’s gonna do the questioning, it’s gonna be me.”

“You think so?”

“I know so, Little Bird.”

The two of you stare at each other, waiting to see who cracks first at the challenge. You blink and you know you’ve lost. “Yeah okay. But you didn’t answer my question,” you reminded him, leaning back.

“Yeah I’m trying, just hard,” he answered and he took a moment to study you. “Are you doing okay? Not to be rude, but you look exhausted.”

You snort and rub your eyes only to wince when you touch the bruise. “I don’t know. I haven’t really had time to process everything properly.”

“How’d you mean?”

“Like I didn’t sit down and cry about it yet. When I got home all I wanted to do was leave. But I forced myself to shower but I think I blacked out or something, I don’t know. I don’t remember it. After that, I left my apartment as fast as I could and called you.”

“Which I’m glad you did, but now you have to take a moment and let it sink in. You can take it now, let yourself not be okay, I won’t judge. Hell, I’m probably the last person to judge.”

You gave him a sad smile and slowly slumping down into your seat, trying to hide from the mostly empty café. As if sensing what you’re trying to do, Jason gets up and moves to sit beside you, angling his body so you’re hidden from view.

A wave of fondness washes over you, and you think he can’t surprise you anymore then he already has. Taking a deep breath, you slowly let it out and close your eyes. Listening to Jason and let yourself not be okay.

The night plays like a movie behind your eyelids and you fight to keep it playing. You feel all the emotions that you managed to push away hit you like a truck, making you tear up. You cover your eyes with your arm and feel movement from beside you.

But you're too embarrassed to look, so you wait until Jason’s right beside you.

“I’m going to hug you okay?” You hear Jason whisper close to your ear. You nod and almost flinch when his arms snake around your waist, but you don’t. This touch is warm, caring. The complete opposite of the mugger. You feel safe for the first time that night.

You relaxed in Jason’s embrace and balled your firsts in his shirt as you cried. He sat there, rubbing your side, whispering that you’re okay, that it will be okay, and waited until you were done.

You sniffle when the sob has subsided but you don’t let go just yet. You’re exhausted, embarrassed that you ended up crying on Jason, and you're not yet ready to face him.

“You’re okay,” Jason murmured, squeezing you reassuringly. You only nod, moving slightly to wipe your nose with your sleeve. But as you move to do that, there’s a napkin in front of you.

“Thanks,” you muttered, taking it and blowing your nose.

“Feeling better?” Jason asked, moving slightly but he kept you in his hold. And you're grateful for it. His touch was something you could get used to.

“Yeah, much. I think I could sleep forever,” you joked, leaning into him you felt his chuckle more then heard it.

“Please don’t, I enjoy your company,” he said and you smiled. “I hope you feel the same.”

“I do,” you hummed, “I’m sorry for crying all over you. I think I got your shirt all wet and snotty.”

“Nothing to be sorry for. It was something you needed and I’ll gladly be your shoulder to cry on.”

Silence settled between you, and you closed your eyes feeling the need to sleep. The two of you stayed like that until Jason could feel your body relax into sleeping.

“Come on, I think it’s time for you to go home,” Jason stated, shaking you a little to keep you awake.

“Noooo,” you whined, pouting as you sat up slowly. “But I’m having a great time.”

“You need sleep,” Jason pointed out, collecting your garbage and standing to throw it out. When he came back, he put on his jacket and smirked as you stared. “We can always hang out another time. Maybe next time it won’t happen at three in the morning.”

“Promise?”

“Promise,” he answered, holding out his hand. You blinked at it before grabbing it and he helped you up. “Come on, I’ll walk you home.”

“You don’t have to have,” you said, quick to shake your head.

“Please? For my peace of mind,” Jason said as he walked the both of you out. “Plus it prolongs the time I get to spend time with you.”

Opening your mouth to argue, you stop yourself and feel the blush creeping into your cheeks. “Fine,” you agreed begrudgingly, though glad for the company.

The walk was short, you spent the time talking about anything that came to mind. And before you knew it you were standing in front of your door. Jason had insisted on walking you up, to make sure you didn’t trip on anything. He had claimed and you didn’t seem to mind.

You have thought about inviting him in, but sleep was calling you and you didn’t want to seem too eager.

“So this is me,” you said awkwardly, unsure how to say goodnight.

“I had a good time,” he said, smiling. You squinted up at him, only now realizing how tall he was.

“I ended up crying.”

“You had a bad night, you deserved to cry after what happened to you,” he countered. “Like I said, I’m the last person to judge.”

“I’m going to get that story one day,” you challenged, and he leaned down a little, smirking. Cocky bastard.

“I’m looking forward to it,” he said, and you gently punched him in the chest with a laugh.

“Text me when you get home?”

“Awe, you worried about me,” he teased. You rolled your eyes as you took your keys out and unlocked the door.

“I can unworry about you,” you said, swinging the door open. Before going in, you turned and gave him a hug, squeezing tight. “Thanks, for you know.”

Jason returned the hug and buried his nose in your hair. “Anytime. Glad you're feeling better.”

You stay like that for a moment before Jason lets you go. He cupped your cheeks and for a brief moment, you thought he might kiss you.

“Night Little Bird, see you soon.”

With that, he turned and walked down the hallway, leaving you feeling warm inside.

Walking in, you unlocked the door and immediately plopped into your bed, letting your body relax. Sleep pulled at you but you were determined to stay awake until Jason texted.

But sleep was just as determined and stronger, you fell asleep just as your phone chimed.

Jason I’m home

#jason todd x reader #jason todd gn!reader #jason todd #batman imagine #online match up #my writing

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lurkingshan · 2 years ago

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Kinou nani tabeta/What Did You Eat Yesterday?

You should know that I attempted to start this write up about half a dozen times before I managed to get a single word down. Every time I tried I just ended up staring at the wall. I don’t think I’ve been this emotionally stunned by a show since I Told Sunset About You, and I don’t say that lightly!

So, is this a good show? My god, YES. What an understatement. Let me tell you, as my MDL can attest, I’ve watched nearly 300 dramas. I’m sure I’ve watched even more Western shows since I had a 30 year head start on those. And I can say confidently that I’ve never seen anything quite like this gem.

Kinou nani tabeta, or What Did You Eat Yesterday?, is a drama about two middle aged gay men living their everyday lives, making and sharing food, reckoning with their identities and expectations, and figuring out how to be together in a long term relationship. That’s it, that’s the show. If that sounds boring to you, I gotta tell you: YOU ARE WRONG.

We meet Shiro and Kenji when they’re in their mid 40s and already a couple years into living together. Over the course of the show, we learn more about their relationship - how they got together, how they differ, where they struggle, where they shine, what they are still figuring out - and we see them work through it all, together. We see them at work, with friends, with their families, out in public, and in the privacy of their own home - we get a full and complete picture of their lives. And we are invited in to experience it with them and get up close and personal with their relationship in a way that feels both cozy and thrilling.

Now, I am not going to go into detail about everything that happens in this show, or attempt to provide deep analysis about its story, its characters, or the various cultures it depicts. This show was released in 2019, the manga began its run many years before that, and there are folks on this website - like @isaksbestpillow and @bengiyo - who have been at this a hell of a long time and thus have a broader context and lived experience from which to critically examine the show and its messages as they relate to Japanese familial values, life as a queer man from an older generation, and building community while living in a culture that is actively hostile to who you are. I implore you to go read their thoughts and learn from their wisdom. But what I will do is mention a couple (3… no 4, okay 5!) things that really made it stand out to me, a lifelong romance reader, avid media consumer, and drama enjoyer (I’m going to keep plot stuff vague because I hope if you’re reading this, you will be watching very soon!):

Let me repeat: this is a drama about a middle aged couple in a long term relationship, and the ongoing growth and deepening of their relationship is the main plot. Do I have to tell you how unique that is? The romance genre is rarely interested in what happens after the couple gets together, and even in other dramas featuring a couple in a LTR, the plot is usually about something else with the relationship in the background. And I’m fairly sure this is the only show of this nature in the entire bl genre (@absolutebl please fact check me if I’m wrong). In this show, the relationship is the point. It’s a rare look at what it actually takes to learn to deal with your baggage and share your life with someone, and I found it deeply moving.

My god these actors. With all due respect to the many fine actors in the bl industry, these two are on another level. We just never get to see seasoned actors of this caliber headlining ql dramas. If I have one tiny critique of this show, it’s that I found the moments when they let us listen in on the characters’ internal monologues mostly unnecessary - every emotional beat played out in their faces and body language. There’s this one scene I can’t stop thinking about, where the main pair are fighting, and one of them says something he doesn’t mean, and you see the regret on his face instantly, followed by a quick aborted movement as if to take it back, but his partner has already turned away and doesn’t see it. Just perfection. And the acting was so good in the finale (@waitmyturtles informed me my absolute fav moment was improvised for fucks sake) that it actually laid me out for like an hour, I was just sitting there in a crying daze.

The writing is so fucking smart. What’s absolutely brilliant about this show is that it’s structured like an episodic slice of life drama, but there is a deeper long term emotional arc at play and the writers forget nothing. Just like in life, in each episode something will happen, it won’t really get fully resolved, and the characters will move on. But on this show, it always comes back around, usually when your guard is down and they can inflict maximum damage by sucker punching you right in the solar plexus. I can hardly believe how many times this show managed to sneak attack me with emotional realness (official Shan cry count: 8/12 episodes caused me to burst into tears, sometimes more than once).

This show will take you through every possible destination on the spectrum of human emotion. I was so emotional while watching this show, in every sense. Crying both happy and sad tears. Swinging wildly between giddy delight, deep sadness, low key anger, and belly laughing. Sometimes the switch happens literally one scene to the next! And yet, there is an evenness to the tone and assuredness to the filmmaking that makes it all feel smooth. You never feel jerked around by the narrative. This is a credit to the writing, acting, and editing all coming together with perfect precision. The people who made this show are masters of their crafts.

OBVIOUSLY I MUST MENTION THE FOOD. Every episode of this show features at least one instance of a character making Japanese food that looks like the best thing you’ve never gotten the chance to eat. I do not recommended watching this without feeding yourself first, because it will have you salivating. And they don’t just show you the characters making the food (even narrating the recipes for you!), they always show you the characters actually eating and enjoying it. Some real foodies were involved in this production and as someone who loves to eat and absolutely was raised to view feeding people as a love language, I loved it.

So now that you are obviously dying to watch it, you must be wondering: where can I find this show? Let me point you to this post on @kinounaniresource, where the amazing Siiri has compiled all the video files and English subs you need. If you’re not familiar with how to use these, you’ll find instructions on her blog (if you get confused come ask me, please don’t bug her about it). I know sometimes shows being a little hard to access is a big deterrent to watching them, but please trust me that this is absolutely worth your time and effort, you will not regret it.

#kinou nani tabeta #what did you eat yesterday?#japanese bl #jdrama #man i am on such a good run with the classics lately #shan recommends #shan shouts into the void

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ladykailitha · 2 years ago

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All My Roads Lead Back to You Part 4

Hello! And welcome to part 4. Edie has more questions than answers, but we’re finding more and more out as the story unfolds.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Eddie wiped away a stray tear that had escaped his eyes before stepping out into the garage.

“Hey, you kids almost done?” he asked. He looked at his watch. “It is getting late.”

Kenny looked up at the clock. “Shoot, man! My mom is going to kill me.”

Mandy swore too. “I’m getting a ride home with you, right?” she asked Kenny. He nodded and they hurried to put their stuff in his car.

They waved goodbye and then Eddie was alone with Harri and Edie.

“How’s Dad?” she asked. “Still puking?”

Eddie shook his head. “I managed to get him into bed.”

Edie rocked her head back. “What? Dad never lets anyone help him to bed. Not even those who can straight up carry him.”

Eddie blinked. “Uh...he let me.”

“He let you what?” Edie asked tilting her head in confusion.

“Carry him to bed?”

“Oh,” Edie said. “Wow. So how do you know my dad?”

Eddie looked over at Harri before shoving his hands in his pockets and looking down at the floor. “Your dad and I used to run together with Nancy and Jon and all them after high school. Well after Steve graduated, anyway. Me and the rest of us older kids graduated in ‘86.”

“You’re younger than my dad?” Edie asked.

Harri scoffed.

“Shut it, kid,” Eddie barked. “No, I’m older. It just took me three tries to graduate.” He glared over at Harri. “Something I trying to make sure this idiot doesn’t repeat.”

Edie frowned, remembering her dad’s comment about not raising a quitter. “You know, it’s strange. I don’t think I’ve ever heard your name before in my life, but I can’t help but think that I’ve been raised on stories of you my entire existence nonetheless.”

Eddie blushed. “Can’t say I did the same. Harri here wouldn’t have heard of Steve Harrington at all. At least not from me.”

“Wait,” Harri said. “That guy that that your old bandmates talk about all the time. The one they keep telling you to make up with, that’s Steve Harrington, isn’t it? What the hell, Dad.”

Eddie grimaced. “Jeff and Gareth have a very inflated sense of ego.”

“Jeff Lawrence?” Edie asked. “Mandy’s dad?”

Eddie pursed his lips. He was going to kill Jeff. It was one thing to say that Steve and him had kept in contact over the years but it was quite another for his daughter to be best friends with Steve’s.

“That’s the one, princess,” Eddie said tossing his head back and rolling his eyes. “Only Jeff was friends with me first.”

Harri kicked his dad’s ankle. “Hey, Uncle Jeff is a grown ass man, he can be friends with whoever he wants. And since you guys aren’t in the band anymore and we were still living in Cali it makes sense Uncle Jeff would want to connect with someone from the old crowd.”

Eddie sneered playfully. “I hate it when you get all cleverer than me.”

Edie was glancing back and forth between them like a tennis match, but finally she had enough. “You’re telling me that not only do you know Mandy, but that you’ve known her dad for years?”

Harri and Eddie both grimaced in unison as they had completely forgotten she was there.

“I didn’t think about how I knew Mandy,” Harri said. “We just started hanging out when we moved here about a month ago and then when she said you guys needed a new guitarist...”

Edie smacked her forehead. “Yep. That’s on me. I didn’t ask either.”

Harri scuffed his shoe on the pavement, looking down. “Am I still going to be allowed to be in the band?”

Eddie’s heart sunk. He looked over at Edie and then back at his son. They were both expecting him to say no. But how could he do that to either of them? It wasn’t their fault.

“What kind of asshole would I be if I said no?” he asked. “Of course you can still be in the band.”

Harri looked up at him all smiles and hugged him. “Thanks Dad!”

Edie smiled at them both. “Thanks, Mr Munson.”

Eddie sighed. “Yeah. Come on, Harri. It’s time to go home, you both have school in the morning.”

“Bye, Miss Thing!” Harri said after giving her a fist bump.

“Bye H-man!” Edie said.

Edie watched as the two Munson boys walked away. Her dad had a lot of explaining to do.

Edie walked into Steve’s room and was impressed by what she saw. The drapes were closed, the light was off, and Dad was actually under the covers. Something no amount of bullying on Aunt Robin or Nancy’s part could ever achieve.

Dad hated being taken care of. But in less than two hours of this man coming into her home, her father had let down more walls than the entire time she had been on this earth.

Who was Eddie Munson? And why did her dad treat him differently then anyone she had ever known.

She knelt next to Steve’s bed and gently roused him from sleep.

“Hey,” he murmured as he slowly got up. “Is everyone gone?”

Edie sat down next to him on the bed and took his hand. “Yeah, they’ve gone.”

Steve nodded. “You must have so many questions.”

“Oodles and gobs,” she agreed. “But I’m going to be nice and wait until your head is no longer trying to kill you.”

He grimaced. “What, so you can finish the job?”

She chuckled. “Something like that.” She played with the ring on his right hand. She once had asked him if it was his wedding ring to Mom, but he’d told her no. It was from something else. From someone else. And now, she was pretty sure she knew who. “Do you need some pain killers?”

Steve nodded barely able to contain his whimper. Edie got up and the pills and a Gatorade. She came back and handed them to him. He took the pills and chugged half of the Gatorade, before handing it back to her.

“Thanks, love,” he murmured and got back under the covers.

“You’ll want to shower and change before you completely are down for the night,” she reminded him gently.

Steve nodded again. “Just a few minutes. Time for the medicine to work.”

“Of course.” She ran her fingers through his hair. “I’ll come back and check on you later.”

Steve hummed in response and she knew she would have to wake him again when she came back.

Steve woke up the next morning better than he usually felt in the aftermath of a migraine. And he knew who to thank for it. He also knew that had he not been in the throes of one of his worst in recent memory, he would have been a lot bitchier. Hurray for migraines, he guessed.

He didn’t have any appointments today so he didn’t have to cancel anything which was a life saver. He could even have Edie take herself to school. He got up and shuffled out to the kitchen in his pjs.

Edie was munching on her cereal when he got out there. “How’s the head?”

Steve waved his fingers back and forth. “So-so. You okay to take yourself to school today?”

She nodded. “Yeah, no trouble.”

They stared each other down for a minute before Steve blinked first.

“So what do you want to know?” he asked, turning on the kettle.

Edie steepled her fingers under her chin. “We can start with how did you meet mega-producer Edmond Munson?”

Steve laughed. “When I met him he was on his first senior year of high school, jumping on tables and ranting about ‘the man’.”

Edie’s eyes went wide. “What?!”

Steve shook his head. “I knew who he was then. And probably before that. As sort of a ‘oh look there’s that dude again making a menace of himself’ kind of way.”

“He really stood on tables and ranted about ‘the man’?” Edie asked incredulously.

He shrugged. “The topics would vary but, yeah. Pretty much the same theme of kids are being oppressed type thing.”

“But you were a preppy jock in high school,” Edie said. “I’ve seen the pictures.”

“Yeah, I was the King and he was the Freak, never the twain shall meet,” Steve agreed. “That’s what he was called, don’t give me that look.” Edie rolled her eyes.

“Okay,” she growled, “but none of this explains how you guys knew each other. Because this sounding like you didn’t.”

Steve leaned on his elbows onto the counter and looked her dead in the eye. “I want you to understand one thing and one thing only. If you go looking this shit up after I tell you, you will be grounded for life. Because it’s been twenty years and he deserves to let sleeping dogs lie. Do. You. Understand. Me?”

Edie’s head jerked back. This was like those moments when she asked about his scars or the many concussions he’s had. Her normally goofy dad was replaced by someone darker, someone who had walked through hell and lived to tell about it. She nodded quickly, her eyes wide.

“Back in his final senior year, the year Nancy, Jonathan, Robin, and Argyle all graduated,” Steve said sternly, “he was accused of murdering a cheerleader. Something your Uncle Dusty swore he would never do. And you know how tenacious he can be when he puts his mind to it.”

Edie nodded. “He’s like a dog with a bone.”

“So we went on this hunt to find Eddie,” Steve continued. “And sure enough he was being railroaded and we tried to clear his name. He almost died.” The last sentence was whispered, pulled from from the very depths of his soul and he hung his head between his shoulders.

“Holy shit,” she whispered. “Really?”

Steve lifted his head and straightened up. He pinched his nose and rubbed it with his knuckle. “Yeah. He got cleared of all charges and then few months later he was gone. Signed a record deal.”

“Your friend that had a band...” Edie muttered. “That was him?”

Steve nodded. “But it’s time for you to go to school. We’ll talk more later.”

Edie knew that she still had a couple of minutes before she needed to go, but she accepted it as the dodge it was. Dad was getting emotional and needed a break.

She nodded and got ready to go. She kissed his cheek. “Love you dad.”

***

Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Epilogue

Tag List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @pyrohonk @trashpocket @goodolefashionedloverboi @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @messrs-weasley @val-from-lawrence @plyerice27 @mightbeasleep @thedragonsaunt @chaoticlovingdreamer @trashpocket @sapphirecobalt-1 @a-little-unsteddie @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @itsall-taken @steddie-as-they-go @lillemilly @callas-shitshow @bisexualdisastersworld @renaissan-vvitch @immortal-iratze @bookbinderbitch @thylatrek @lilacrobin @nightmareglitter

#My writing #stranger things #steddie #reconnecting years later AU #ladykailtiha writes

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buckevantommy · 8 months ago

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re: BuckTommy Coffee Date Song Choice

Okay, so I really can’t stand the song choice for the coffee date scene. I made a supercut of their scenes so far, but every time I get to the cafe I feel the urge to mute it. So, I wanna fix it.

While watching this scene I couldn’t help but think a Nick Drake song would’ve been a better choice. I don’t know how it works with music rights etc. but I do think the music editor dropped the ball hard on this scene because the song they chose is drab, too slow, and a poor lyrical match (imho). I’ve chosen 4 different Nick Drake songs which I think are a far better match, and I’ve done my best to overlay them.

[I tried filtering out that background song best i could, but some of the vocals underlying the dialogue were sneaky and stayed behind, so apologies for their presence in the audio. I’m not a pro, just a fan with some spare time and a mac.]

vimeo

1. Pink Moon - obviously my first choice. The vibe is mellow but not too slow as to drag down the scene. There’s a perfectly timed piano intro as Tommy explains Evan has nothing to apologise for, the change in instrument lining up with the insight. The melody builds as Buck says he wants something with Tommy, the lyrics (imho) giving this feeling of acknowledging this new and beautiful thing and how it’s almost here, he almost has it but not quite (he’s still learning and wants to experience it). We get a bit of instrumental over them discussing the wedding. The lyrics suit Buck’s bi awakening, and bonus points for the mention of ‘pink’ because i just think that’s cute. The song is actually about 20 seconds too short so i had to double it up, but the lyrics still match well and it ends on the mention of ‘pink moon gonna get you all’ with ‘pink moon’ fading out into the wedding scene, which is so cute.

vimeo

2. Northern Sky - a great fit lyrically, the discovery of this magical new thing in life and how it (and Tommy) brightens Buck’s world, as well as certain lyrics placing perfectly over relevant dialogue. It’s smoother than the other choices and has more instrument layers; I don’t like when the piano gets boppy in the middle because it feels out of place with the rest of the song and the scene, but the instrumental part that coincides with Buck being vulnerable and honest with Tommy fits and the ending is nice. Also: just realised there's a tink-tink-tink in perfect time with Buck placing the coffee cups down and moving his chair! And it ends with: 'would you love me' which is just so perfect.

vimeo

3. Place To Be - has the mellowest vibe, a strummed guitar melody, and the lyrics suit Buck's bi awakening not being in his younger years, instead he's just now finally finding clarity. It mentions being new, and has sunshine lyrics, and perfectly places a dejected lyric over Buck reiterating how Tommy said he doesn’t think Buck is ready, followed by the line ‘give me a place to be’ as Buck says he wants to try something with Tommy. Instrumental interlude as Buck asks Tommy to the wedding, with lyrics about being ‘strong in the sun’ as he assures Tommy he’s serious while being bathed in sunlight. It ends on a lyric about being ‘weaker than the palest blue’ and both their eyes are blue, and Tommy just agreed to be Buck’s wedding date, so.

vimeo

4. Which Will - has a slightly more energised plucked melody but still pretty mellow, it still suits the convo pace. The lyrics suit Buck questioning what Tommy will do, whether Tommy will choose him. There’s a brief instrumental piece where Buck gets his vulnerable moment, and Tommy expresses his interest over the ‘which do you dance for’ lyric. It ends on ‘which will you take now if you won't take me’ tying into the hope of it all.

💖 I’m curious to know what you guys think: Did you like their song choice? Do you have another song in mind for this scene? I’d also love to know which Nick Drake song you think works best. 💖

#evantommy #bucktommy #kinley kinkley tevan firepilot fireflight #911 abc #911 7x05 #music #soundtrack #buck is bi #.txt #nick drake #911 #Vimeo

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thenextdawn-temporarilyclosed · 2 years ago

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One of Your Kind (Ch. 10)

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 | Ch. 9 | Ch. 10

Word count: 4.4K

Warnings: blood, serious injuries

Pairing: Jenna Ortega X Fem!Reader

———

“Jen, there was a terrible huge car accident, a few victims, some are in really bad condition. I need to get to the hospital and help in the ER. I’ll see you at home.” These were the words her mother told her before Jenna was left alone at the premiere, with her friends and crew, who will take her home later that night.

disbelief and fear filled your mind as you laid on your back, sandwiched between the cold, soft dirt and the hot, slick metal of the car. The weight of the car pressed down on your full body with monster force. It did not hurt, your body was numb. All you could feel was the car hood's mass stamping your body further and further into the ground. Your lungs felt pinched shut and air would neither enter nor escape them. Your mind was buzzing. What had just happened? In the distance, on that cursed road, you saw cars driving by completely unaware of what happened, how you felt. You tried to yell but your voice was unheard. All you could do was wait. Wait for someone to help you or wait to die.

Meanwhile, Natalie had been called on the scene instead of the ER, she didn’t know why but when nurses and doctors were called on the scene it meant that it was really, really bad. And it definitely was. A truck had ran a red light, just out of town, pushing another car down the hill. The car rolled and rolled, until it came to a stop when it hit a tree. Another car was involved too, smashing against a wall, everyone inside of it was dead. As soon as. Natalie arrived and saw the scene, she wished she never did see that. The people in the car smashed against the wall were reduced to blood and crashed bones, she never saw something so bad. Then she walked over to the firemen, who were going down the hill with a rope to the car that had rolled down. “What do we have here?” Natalie asked. “Female, 20 to 25 years old. She’s unconscious and unresponsive, her body’s stuck between pieces of the car and we can’t get her out. The driver’s dead, but we have hope for the girl. We’ll tie a rope around you and help you down so you can take her vitals”

Natalie nodded and looked down at the car for the first time. It was a black, car with dark tinted windows… she knew that kind of car. It was one of those cars for famous people, and tonight the only car like that that left the awards sooner was your car. Natalie started going down the hill thinking, ‘please let it not be her, please’ she silently prayed, she hated the thought of you being in this conditions. As soon as she took a look in the car she saw that it was you. Covered in blood and bruises, but it was you. Her heartbeat faltered for a moment at the thought of you getting seriously hurt or even dying. However she couldn’t reach you from outside the car, so she had to slide inside through the car window. “(Y/N)? Honey can you hear me?” Natalie said, reaching her hand onto your neck looking for a pulse. You were bleeding from your head continuously, your whole face covered in it. “I’ve got a pulse! Let’s get her out of this car!” Natalie yelled, trying to get the firemen’s attentions.

“(Y/N) I need you to answer to me sweetheart” Natalie tried, managing to move a hand to your face as she opened your eye, moving a flashlight in front of your eyes. “Her Pupils are dilated, you need to move now!” Natalie insisted, watching as you slowly became paler. “You can’t leave us honey. We need you, you have a bright future ahead of you” she basically begged, talking to you, still unconscious and bleeding. She tried to get a look at your lower body, but it was basically crushed from the chest down and she couldn’t see it. She just has to wait till they get you out, which was a couple hours later. She kept checking on your pulse which was getting fainter with each minute that passed but soon enough you were out of the car and laying on a stretcher. You had a broken vertebra, a few broken ribs and your pelvis was almost completely shattered. When your heartbeat had been stabilized you were immediately being rushed to the hospital, Natalie in the ambulance with you as she decided it was finally time to text her daughter a ‘honey, please get to the hospital. It’s urgent’

It wasn’t long before the brunette was driving from the awards to the hospital, where she paced nervously around the waiting room. It was almost three in the morning so the room was empty. “Darling?” Her mother finally called and Jenna walked over, holding her dress up as not to trip. “Mom what’s wrong? Is everyone okay? Is everyone safe Home?” Jenna asked precipitously, her mother placing her hand on her daughter’s shoulder. “Yes darling, everyone’s safe at home. They’re all probably sleeping right now” Natalie replied with a small sad smile “then why did I have to come here urgently?” Natalie sighed and looked down. “I can’t put it into words, You have to see it yourself…” she replied and Jenna gulped, she felt her heart speed up “you’re making me worried” Jenna said and followed her mother into the corridor of the ICU, it was extremely quiet, the only noise being the beeping monitors and the breathing machines, and the occasional chatters of the doctors.

Eventually they reached a room, the window was covered by the drapes to have some privacy, and some slow beeping could be heard coming from inside. “Wait, before we get inside” Natalie said, stopping Jenna before she could open the door. “You’re not going to like what you’ll see… she’s stable for now, but until she wakes up we won’t know if she has brain damage-“ Natalie was about to continue, but Jenna interrupted her. “Who’s she?” Jenna asked, visibly confused. Natalie sighed and opened the door to your room. You laid there unconscious, a neck collar around you and multiple machines attached to you. You had multiple cuts on your face, multiple bandages on your body from the surgeries you had to endure. Jenna was at loss for words, she had seen multiple scenarios like this one, but seeing you in these conditions was doing her no good. “W-what happened?” She said walking in the room, next to your bed as she took a look at you. The distressed look on your face was something that will definitely haunt her dreams, she just wished it was a horrible nightmare and that she’d wake up and you’d be fine.

“Remember when I told you that I got called in for a car crash? I went to the scene, she’s the only survivor. She was stuck under the car, her head was bleeding, she has a broken vertebra, a few broken ribs… her pelvis was almost completely shattered. The surgeons don’t know if she’ll ever be able to walk again…” Jenna shook her head, tears began flooding her eyes “no that can’t be true, there has to be some sort of m-mistake” she said, trying not to give in to the tears. She leaned over to you, moving some hair out of your face as she gently caressed your cheeks. She was barely touching you, afraid she’ll hurt you. “(Y/N) you ha-have to wake up” she said and looked at you, she just wanted to see her reflection in your eyes “wake up!” She insisted and gave in to the tears, trying to get to to wake up. Natalie was about to cry too, but she went to hug her daughter to give her the comfort she needed “I c-can’t lose her m-mom” she sobbed out, hiding her face in her mother’s chest. “I know baby I know” she said, hugging her sobbing daughter.

She had seen her distressed before, but never like this, which confirmed her that even after pushing you away, Jenna still cared deeply about you, she still loved you. “I promise you we’ll do whatever we can to make sure she’ll recover perfectly.” Jenna nodded quickly, still hiding her face in her mom’s chest. “It’ll be a long way before she fully recovers and she’ll need us. She’ll need you and even if she’ll try pushing you away you have to stay for her” Jenna nodded again and soon enough she was back to looking at you, sitting down on the chair next to your bed. She was still in her dress from the award, but she didn’t want to leave knowing you were in so much pain. Jenna didn’t plan on leaving and as a matter of fact she stayed there at the hospital the whole night, just watching over you and waiting for you to be alright.

The next morning you seemed to have stabilized a bit, your heartbeat was steady and even if you were attached to a monitor, Jenna kept checking on your pulse the whole night, she didn’t even sleep. when her mother came to check in on you she brought Jenna some food which she gladly took, without taking her eyes off of you. “We have to do something you might not like” Natalie started, making Jenna look up at her. “We need to lower her morphine down until she wakes up. She’ll be in a lot of pain, but we need to check if there’s any brain damage… is this okay with you?” Natalie asked, which made Jenna look at her in confusion. “I thought you knew. (Y/N) has you as her emergency contact and you’re listed to be the one to take decisions for her in case she can’t… like now” Jenna sighed, she felt this huge responsibility on her right now, but she couldn’t stand down. She needed you to be alright. “Will it help you and the doctors get her better?” She asked and Natalie nodded. Then Jenna gave consent and doctors started lowering your morphine.

Jenna was watching you intently, waiting for any reaction from you. Natalie was standing next to you, with her flashlight ready to examine you the moment you woke up. When you did you immediately felt incredible pain on your whole body, your eyes shot open and you felt like you couldn’t breathe if it wasn’t for the tube in your mouth, that was so bothering and hurting you so much. “(Y/N), honey you need to calm down” her voice was like an echo, you felt dizzy and disoriented, your eyes were looking around frenetically in search for someone that you recognized, until you saw Natalie and you started taking deep breaths. “Do you know where you are?” You nodded slightly at her question, tears leaving your eyes from the immense pain. “Do you know who I am?” You nodded again. She then proceeded to have you follow her finger and look at the light. She sighed of relief when she saw you were alright and you didn’t have any brain damages “I’m gonna put you back to sleep right now-“ she said but you interrupted her, grasping her shirt, looking at her with fear. You were scared and you didn’t want to be alone.

You were completely unaware of the fact that Jenna was there too, as she had left the room the moment she heard you whimper in pain. It was too bad of a sight for her. Natalie took ahold of your hand and squeezed it reassuringly “you’ll be okay sweetheart. I’m here, you’re not alone okay?” You slightly nodded, still whimpering from the pain. You wanted to ask if Jenna was there, but you couldn’t ask that with only your eyes available. “I’m going to set the morphine level high again okay?” She got up and moved to where the morphine was, but you stopped her with a louder whimper and only looked at her, hoping she’d understand what you wanted only looking at you in the eyes. You looked at the door, hoping she’d understand. Fortunately for you she did. “Jenna’s here. Don’t worry darling she’s here and she won’t leave your side.” You nodded again and finally she raised the morphine level until you were asleep again.

Natalie left the room and saw her daughter sitting down on the floor against the wall. When she saw her mother she stood up. “Are you finished? Is she alright?” Jenna asked, wiping her tears. “No brain damage fortunately. We’re going to wait a couple days for her conditions to improve and then we’ll take her off the morphine” Jenna nodded and sighed of relief “mom?” Jenna asked when she saw her mother starting to leave “is any of this my fault? Is it my fault that she’s…-“ she was about to start crying again, luckily her mother noticed and hugged her tightly. “No baby it is not your fault. I promise you” she said and kissed her daughter’s forehead, trying to reassure her. “If I never hurt her, she wouldn’t have been so traumatized whenever she saw me, she wouldn’t have left the premiere early because of me, she wouldn’t be in that fucking bed” she pointed out and sobbed, once again sniffling in her mother’s chest.

“I know you and her have been talking before the awards. I knew she had been at our place because I could smell her scent in the living room, I knew that I had hurt her yet I never apologized. I never tried winning her beck, I just let her suffer. I knew she was suffering and I did nothing about it. I knew she was depressed because of me and I did nothing about it. Now she’s in that bed and partly it’s because of me and it hurts so bad mom, it hurts so bad” Natalie only tightened the hug and kissed her daughter’s head “the least you can do now is be by her side until she recovers. She needs us and she needs you particularly so don’t let go of her”

‘Famous actress (Y/N)(L/N) was involved in a terrible car crash. She was the only survivor but we don’t know anything about her conditions yet.’ This how the most recent article begun, you were all over the news. It was almost everyday that paparazzi wanted to get into the hospital to snap a picture of you, but Natalie always told them off and made sure you were left alone, or alone with Jenna, even if you weren’t awake yet. Fortunately, you did wake up after a week, your body was still weak, but you had recovered some energies and could breathe on your own. When you woke up there was no one in your room. The tube in your Mouth almost suffocating you as you coughed. You pressed the medical assistance button on the side of your bed and within seconds Natalie was there and took your tubes out, allowing you to breathe on your own. She passed you some water and you drank a little because your throat was dry, and then Natalie sat down on your bed and caressed your cheeks.

“You gave us a big scare honey” she started, sighing of relief as you leaned in to the familiar touch. “I’m sorry” you said, voice hoarse and you looked at her. “W-what happened to me? I mean- what did I break?” You asked, you didn’t want to talk about the accident. You just wanted to know what bones you have broken. “You have a broken vertebra and a few broken ribs… those healed already but you still need to wear a collar” you nodded at her words and then watched her take a deep breath. “Honey, your lower half was completely under the car. Your pelvis was almost completely shattered. The surgeons fixed it but your nerves and tendons were severely damaged. There’s a high chance you might never… you might never walk again” you felt your heart skip a beat at that. You wanted to cry, you wanted to scream but you knew you had to stay calm. “But there’s- there must be some kind of therapy right??” The feeling of not being able to walk again Made you sick to your stomach, if you never recovered your career would be over.

“Yes there are some therapies. We will definitely put you on the list but if your nerves are completely damaged it’ll be useless, you get that right?” You were about to reply, but the door opened that same moment. “Mom is she alright? I was told someone requested medical assistance here…” she was to continue, but then saw you were awake. Jenna thought about this moment for the past week, but now that you were awake she didn’t know how to act, what to tell you. “I’ll leave you girls alone” Natalie said and stood up, leaving the room as you were left alone with Jenna. Both of you didn’t know what to say, an uncomfortable silence filled the room. “(Y/N) I’m sorry-“ you were quickly to interrupt her. “Don’t…” you looked at her briefly, before looking away. “Just… hug me?” You pleaded, she wasn’t expecting this. “Are you sure?” She asked and looked at you, with tears in her eyes. “Yes, please just give me a hug” Jenna didn’t want to be told twice, so she leaned in and wrapped her arms around your torso, careful not to hurt you but you were the one to tighten the hug, sobbing into her shoulder. You had been wanting her hug for a lot now, and you couldn’t help but break down when you were finally in her arms again.

A couple tears left Jenna’s eyes as well, she rubbed your back and tried to comfort you while apologizing multiple times. There wasn’t an excuse for how she treated you, but she knew she wanted to make it up to you. “I was so s-scared” you sobbed out, in this moment you didn’t care if she hurt you a lot, you needed her, you needed her presence, you needed her comfort and luckily she was there to give it to you. “You’re okay now… you’ll be okay” she said and only hugged you tighter. “Please don’t leave again” you begged and gripped her shirt, keeping her close to you “I don’t want to be alone” you said and sniffled, then you felt Jenna caress the back of your head. “I won’t leave you again… I promise” she whispered and kissed your cheek before pulling back from the hug and sitting down on the bed’s edge, looking at you with a small smile “It’s good seeing you awake… we were really worried for you” she said and looked at you with a small, sad smile.

“(Y/N), I’m really sorry for how I treated you-“ you sighed and shook your head “Jen I don’t want to hear it-“ she interrupted you “no, I need to say this, please” you were hesitant, but you ended up nodding at her words and listening to her “I never meant a word of what I said. I become irrational and I don’t think before speaking, but really I never meant any of that” she said, talking about the day you broke up because she told you she didn’t need you anymore. “Why did you never apologize then?” You asked her and saw how she went silent. “If you never meant that, why did you never apologize to me?” She looked down “I didn’t feel worthy of that. I felt like you deserved someone better then me” you shook your head, at least she was being honest with you. “Jen… no one will ever be as good as you. You’re what’s best for me…” you said. “But…” she continued “but you betrayed my trust. You didn’t support me, you never asked me how I was doing. Not once did you let me talk about myself, I felt shut out. I wasn’t able to talk about what made me happy because you didn’t want to hear it, you were always focused on work and you made me feel like my presence was useless. And when you told me that you were happy without me, I felt my heart break. You confirmed my thoughts, that my presence was useless”

“I’m so sorry for making you feel that way, please, please forgive me” Jenna begged, taking a hold of your hand and squeezing it “I want you in my life, that’s for sure” you said and looked at her. “But it’ll take me a lot if time to trust you again, and I don’t know if we will ever be a couple again” you said and she nodded “let’s just give it time” you said, trying to reassure her as you pulled her in for another hug. You were too good of a person to push her away completely, but for Jenna this was good too. She’d do anything to be with you in any kind of way. Weeks passed, you were still at the hospital and Jenna was coming to visit you every day. She had deleted all of her meetings that needed her outside of town, because she needed to be close to you. She even postponed filming up until she knew you would be out of the hospital.

Eventually it was time for you to try and walk. You were scared, really scared, because if you couldn’t walk, then yes, your career as an actress will definitely be over. Doctors helped put you on a wheelchair and took you to the hospital’s small gym, Jenna and Natalie were there too as you were really anxious and needed calming down. The doctors helped you stand up, one of the doctors standing in front of you to hold you in case you ever fell as you held yourself up on the bars, too scared to even take one step. your legs were shaking and you were in so much pain, but you didn’t know if it was psychological. “I c- I can’t” you shook your head, tears in your eyes as you sat back down on the wheelchair, to scared to walk. “Yes you can” Jenna started, making her way over to you as she cupped your face. “You’re doing great (Y/N)” she said and caressed your cheeks with her thumbs “you managed to stand up and that alone is great. If you manage to take a few steps then you won’t have to walk anymore today. Just… do it for yourself, for your career and for the people that love you”

You were still scared as hell, but you knew you couldn’t give up. “I’ll hold your hand if you want me to” Jenna said and you nodded, standing up slowly you took her hand in your own, squeezing it tightly as you took a few steps. Your pelvis and legs hurt a lot, you took about 10 steps before you couldn’t handle the pain anymore and asked to be brought to your room. You saw doctors talk about your conditions and suggest treatments and surgeries to make you feel less pain, you’ll eventually have to choose within them. Days passed and as you kept on trying to walk and constantly failing, you told Jenna that she didn’t have to come watch you trying to walk, as she didn’t deserve to see you in pain. Truth is, you wanted to surprise her eventually. You were close with her again, sure you weren’t a couple but you acted the same you used to before you got together the first time. Today you were sitting up on your hospital bed, scrolling on instagram when Jenna arrived “hey! How are you today?” She asked you and sat down on your bed. You put your phone away and looked at her.

“I’m a bit better. Still can’t really walk but, you know” you shrugged, lying. She didn’t know that you were actually getting better and you could almost walk on your own, you were just waiting for the perfect time to surprise her. “I have the Scream VI premiere in new york next week, I wanted you to come with me but if you can’t walk, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable” here it is, this is the perfect occasion. You’d buy tickets for new york and surprise her at the premiere “I’ll be watching from here” you said and smiled at her, but mostly at yourself for the idea you just had. Of course you told everything to Natalie as well, and she talked with the doctors who allowed you to leave the hospital to go attend the premiere. It would be your first time in public after the accident and you were really nervous only at the idea of having to take a car to get to the airport.

You nearly had a panic attack when in the car, but you calmed down once you reached the airport. Luckily there weren’t any paparazzi so you were pretty sure that no one would spoil Jenna the surprise and it was great. Once in new york you had your stylists and make up artists helped you choose a look for the night that was to come and you went for something simple, as you had to use crutches while walking you couldn’t wear something that could make you trip and fall, so you wore a short dress with a jacket, and headed to the premiere, once again panicking when in the car. When your car pulled up, basically everyone was confused, all the actors had arrived so no one knew who had just arrived. That was until you got out of the car. Jenna was busy in an interview so she didn’t see you but the other actors did. You already knew them and they were glad to see you were doing great after the accident, and paparazzi were snapping pictures of you as you explained the actors what you were doing there.

When Jenna was finished with the interviews and she went to the other actors she saw you, standing there. “(Y/N)? Oh my god you’re walking!?” She walked over and hugged you tightly. “You lied to me!” She giggled and gently nudged your side “I wanted to surprise you. I still have to use the crutches but I can walk on my own” you said and she only tightened the hug. You moved your weigh on one leg and hugged her back. “You’re such an idiot” she said and pulled back, taking a hold of your hand

“yeah but I’m your favorite idiot”

A/N: wrote this chapter while sick with a temperature over 100 so this is not the best but I hope you still like it!

Tags: @idkjustliving2 @tundra1029 @engenelxver @rainbow-love4ever @gimaximoff @wol-fica @lum13 @eviekensington @i984 @otherstainedrose @rockwyn @thekid4466 @myfturn

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