#it won’t solve anything nor will it make everything all right

[sknyuz]

cheers to youth | na baekjin

synopsis — seventeen begins to feel less like a number and more like a fleeting chance at youth for baekjin, and you're determined to help him reclaim it. now playing — cheers to youth - seventeen pairing — na baekjin x reader genre — a prequel to before the storm, fluff, hurt/comfort, f2l cw — mentions of violence (bruised knuckles, blood), implied gang activity, hints of trauma, light angst wc — ~3k

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⤷ read before the storm here

note: i am soooo excited to bring them back <3 thank u sm bubble anon and i hope to hear ur thoughts about this. ur request was a great way to circle back to their story. so, here’s a bit more of a softer side to our before the storm couple, before before the storm.

baekjin has been tutoring you for a few months.

months of sharp pencil taps and hushed explanations about algebra formulas, chemical equations, and the difference between mitosis and meiosis. three months of neatly organized notes, and surprisingly, moving from the library to quiet cafes after school, and the faint scent of worn-out textbooks. and somewhere between “you’re solving this backwards again” and “just memorize the codes by category,” you started to notice it.

it being: baekjin is different from you—not in the way most teenage boys are. he doesn’t tease, doesn’t zone out mid-sentence or start humming the latest pop song stuck in his head, baekjin is the kind of different that feels… heavier.

he doesn’t skip class or doodles in the margins of his notebook. and he definitely doesn’t take mirror selfies or kick vending machines when their drink gets stuck. baekjin doesn’t scream when teachers announce a pop quiz—just flips the page like he’s been expecting it all along.

you notice it especially in the way he walks—like he’s older than the rest of you. like seventeen is just a number he has to wear, not a year he gets to live in.

for you, seventeen is messy. it’s loud and full of mistakes, it’s glittery pens and bad decisions and crushes you won’t remember in two years.

but for baekjin, seventeen looks like duty, like pressure. like everything could fall apart if he dares to slow down.

and then the bell rings—that sharp, metallic echo that usually means freedom.

but baekjin doesn’t flinch with relief, he flinches like he’s bracing for something.

when the bells ring, i become fearful / these days, my heart gets scared first

you’re walking out of the building together, the sky bleeding into early evening. his backpack’s weighed down with papers—union notes, scribbled with surveillance details and plate numbers, things no seventeen-year-old should have to memorize.

he doesn’t bother hiding them from you anymore.

maybe he tried, once—keeping his bruised knuckles in his sleeves during tutoring, glancing at his phone under the table like it wasn’t burning a hole in his pocket. but now, he knows there’s no point, you’ve always noticed more than you let on. maybe you’re not as oblivious as your homeroom teacher thinks you are.

and maybe that’s why he lets the notes spill out so easily now—right next to your math textbook, like they belong there. he doesn’t flinch when your eyes catch the names or the red circles. he doesn’t apologize when he’s late, when his jaw is tense, when there’s dried blood on his collar.

you don’t push, you never ask about it.

and somehow, that quiet understanding—your decision to let him keep his secrets without making him feel like a secret—is more comforting than anything.

it’s not subtle, nor is it normal. but for baekjin, it’s something that feels oddly peaceful.

“do you even like being in high school?” you ask suddenly. your voice is light, but your heart’s not.

he doesn’t look up, just keeps writing something in his notebook as he walks. “…that’s not the point.”

i want to be alone, but i don’t want to be alone / i don’t get myself either…

“what is the point, then?” you lean closer, not letting him off that easily, “if you’re not having fun now, when will you? when you’re dead or dying?” you snort, but baekjin tenses up.

his pen stalls, the tip presses too long into the page, leaving behind a blot of ink. you watch it bloom like something bruising.

he lifts his eyes to you, just for a second, and there’s a flicker of something there—something soft, almost unsure, like a door left ajar. like he wants to say something, but doesn’t have the words for it yet.

so you smile at him, and that’s when you decide: if baekjin can’t find the fun in seventeen, then maybe you’ll just have to bring it to him yourself.

you take him to a photo booth after school.

you pile silly props onto his head—mismatched glasses and floppy bunny ears while he tries to duck out of the frame.

“baekjin,” you say, tugging his sleeve. “just one picture. c’mon.”

he hesitates, so you squint into the lens and say, “if you don’t smile, i’m writing ‘DNA is my myers-briggs personality type’ on our next biology exam.”

his head jerks toward you, scandalized—and that’s when the camera flashes, catching the sound of his startled laugh mid-escape.

in this suffocating world / i smiled for a moment at something small…

you wait for it to print and tuck it into your pocket.

baekjin doesn’t ask for a copy, but you catch him glancing over your shoulder as you look at it again later. just once. like he wants to remember what that felt like. maybe he wouldn’t mind seeing himself like that again.

the next monday at school, baekjin finds the photo booth strip tucked inside his notebook.

the following week after tutoring, you drag a grumbling baekjin to the ice cream shop next to your academy. you hand him a cone that’s too bright, too blue, too artificial-looking. he stares at it like you handed him a grenade.

“just try it,” you say, already halfway through your own.

he takes a bite, flinching with a subtle grimace, eyes narrowing at the cone.

“this tastes like melted bubblegum,” he says flatly.

you laugh, “good! you’re supposed to taste your childhood.”

he opens his mouth—maybe to say childhood?, like it’s a foreign word. baekjin doesn’t remember much sweetness in his. only the kind of silence that swallows whole, the kind of pain that you outgrow only in size. there were no ice creams or photobooths, only cracked knuckles, bitten lips, too many nights where the only thing he tasted was copper and fear.

but now, he’s still in his youth, isn’t he? he’s still got time. maybe this—this ridiculous, artificial bubblegum flavor—can be the new taste of it, maybe it can fill in the blank spaces where laughter should’ve been, maybe it can be the one thing that finally overtakes the taste of blood in his mouth and ache in his chest.

so he doesn’t complain again. just finishes the whole thing, sticky fingers and all.

it just so happens we’re facing today for the first time / even if you hate yourself more from the deeply hurtful remarks you said / let’s not worry about it…

a few weeks later, something shifts in baekjin.

he shows up to tutoring with a split lip and silence clinging to his shoulders like a second jacket. he doesn’t offer an explanation, and you don’t ask—not yet. but you notice the way his eyes stay fixed on his notes like he’s trying to disappear into the margins. how the pen in his hand presses too hard, like he’s holding back something that wants to claw out.

you don’t like the way he flinches when someone laughs too loud outside the café window. or how he doesn’t touch his drink, just lets the ice melt.

so you slam your notebook shut and say, “we’re going out.”

baekjin blinks. “…what?”

“noraebang.”

“no.”

“yes.” your voice is firm, but you smile. “you can sit in the corner and sulk if you want. but you’re not going home like this.”

he sighs like he hates that you notice things, but he follows you out the door anyway.

the karaoke room is smaller than you expected, the mic a little too echoey, the screen slightly lagging behind the beat. still, you’re already queuing up songs while baekjin stands awkwardly by the couch like he’s considering making a run for it.

“i don’t sing,” he mutters, eyes scanning the laminated songbook like it might bite.

“good thing i do,” you grin, clicking on a familiar intro—the kind of upbeat, fluttery track you know he’d never pick.

you toss him the tambourine, and he catches it without thinking. “what am i supposed to do with this?” he asks, gaze flicking up to you—quizzical, unimpressed.

“participate in your youth!” you say, already grabbing the mic as the first verse starts.

he rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t leave. a minute later, he’s still there—half-heartedly tapping the tambourine against his palm as you belt out the chorus, your voice cracking with enthusiasm more than skill.

we should be solving quadratic formulas right now, he thinks. and you probably will flunk your next test at this rate. he sighs with the thought—but that also means he’ll have to tutor you again next week.

his eyes drift toward you—they don’t leave.

with our voices, wherever we are, let’s sing—cheers to youth…

baekjin doesn’t sing, that part was true. he doesn’t even hum. but there’s a ghost of a smirk tugging at his mouth, barely there. his eyes stay on you like the rest of the world has gone quiet.

and for once, the union feels a little less close. like in this cramped, echoey karaoke room—with you laughing off-key under dim lights—it’s somewhere far away, out of reach.

it’s raining when you step out of the karaoke room. not a drizzle—a full, angry downpour, bouncing off the pavement and pooling along the curb.

“perfect,” you mutter, tugging your bag over your shoulder. you forgot your umbrella—again—but baekjin didn’t.  he sighs, pulling out a small umbrella from his backpack. “you always forget yours.” this wasn’t the first time you forgot your umbrella.

“i like to live on the edge,” you grin, ducking under his. he stiffens a little as your shoulder brushes his.

your place is only two blocks away. you insist it’s faster than waiting, and baekjin, though visibly reluctant, walks beside you in the downpour. the umbrella doesn’t quite cover both of you. but he doesn’t complain when your shoulder brushes his, or when his other one gets soaked in the rain.

he should be with the union right now, there’s a meeting and he knows it, feels the weight of it tugging at the edges of his mind like a leash. but your warmth is close, and the rain is loud, and somehow… baekjin’s legs move before he thinks.

a few minutes later, you pause at your doorstep, rainwater slipping from your sleeves as you fumble with the key.

“your parents… probably wouldn’t want me staying,” he says, clearing his throat. his voice is steady, but his eyes flick to the street like he’s searching for a way out. he shifts back a step, fingers tightening on the umbrella still dripping at his side. “i should head out.”

but he knows it’s just an excuse. he noticed it earlier—how he softened without meaning to, how stepping inside your world felt like crossing a line he wasn’t sure he deserved to.

“i live alone,” you say, quiet but certain.

not many things surprise him, but that piece of information might have made him feel it. maybe because you always seemed like someone who’d come home to a warm meal and soft smiles, the kind of person whose energy felt… loved. lived in. he never imagined you turning the lights on to silence—never pictured you being alone in the same ways he is.

a flicker of concern bubbles in his chest—unfamiliar, uninvited, but not unwelcome.

it settles beside the rest of the feelings he hasn’t named yet.

he hesitates… then steps inside.

your apartment is small, a little cluttered, but warm. the kind of place with mismatched socks drying on the heater and cereal boxes stacked on top of the fridge. baekjin’s eyes scan the room like he’s trying to memorize it, but he doesn’t say much. just sets his shoes neatly by the door and follows you inside.

you hand him a towel. he takes it with a quiet nod, his gaze flicking toward the small, but comfortable mess of your space before he looks away.

later, he lies beside you on the floor under a ceiling of glow-in-the-dark stars you stuck up last summer. they’re uneven, a few peeling at the corners, but still glowing faintly above your heads like they’re trying their best. baekjin doesn’t ask why you put them up. but he thinks about how you probably put them up alone—no one else around to help. and for a moment, he almost can’t stop a faint grin from tugging at his lips as he imagined how clumsy you would’ve been, but it’s swallowed by the dim light and his unsaid thoughts.

the rain hasn’t let up, tapping soft against the windows like it’s afraid to interrupt. you’re both wrapped in different ends of the same blanket, quiet now. your breathing steady, his a little more uneven.

in this trivial warmth of the cozy blanket that wrapped around me / i fall asleep waiting for tomorrow again

baekjin doesn’t talk about himself, not at all. he’s the kind of boy who folds in on silence, who carries things so quietly you forget they weigh anything at all. but tonight, something in that boy shifts.

he turns toward you, eyes catching the stars for a second too long.

then, his voice comes out softly, the quietest and most hesitant you’d ever hear him speak: “i don’t think i ever let myself feel like this.”

you blink. “like what?”

he shifts his weight, a small, frustrated sigh escaping his lips. “like it’s okay to just… live like this.” he doesn’t say it outright, but you understand. his voice cracks, just barely.

you roll over to face him and your eyes meet in the dim, “it is okay, baekjin.”

he stares at you for a long moment, like he’s not sure if he’s allowed to believe you.

then he exhales. “i want to hate myself a little less than yesterday.”

the loud alarm that rings every morning / i want to hate a little less than yesterday…

he doesn’t say much when he leaves in the morning. just a short nod and a glance that lingers at your door a moment longer than it should. but later, at school, you notice something new.

after a big test, maybe—one that baekjin had crushed, as usual, without breaking a sweat.

a photo strip—creased from being carried around, tucked into the clear back pocket of his phone case. you in heart-shaped sunglasses and his startled smile, next to his test marked 100.

he doesn’t hide it when you see, doesn’t pretend it’s not there.

“you worked hard,” you say softly, voice quieter than usual.

and you’re not just talking about the test score, not really. it’s the way he’s finally letting himself live—if only for a few moments here and there. letting himself be a kid, even if it’s just with you. that’s the secret you hold dearly.

his gaze shifts, and his chest lifts a little at your words. he knows exactly what you mean. it’s not about the paper, not at all.

“it wasn’t easy,” he echoes, voice low, as if the weight of it hasn’t quite settled in yet. “but it wasn’t so bad.”

as i’m heading home, ‘you worked hard’ / that it wasn’t easy, but it wasn’t so bad…

and maybe that’s how it starts—an ice cream cone, a bad karaoke duet, and a quiet night under plastic stars.

baekjin doesn’t let people in easily. but after your tutoring sessions, it slowly becomes routine. a few steps slower on the way home, maybe a shared drink at the corner store with his hand brushing yours once, then not pulling away the next time.

he starts showing up without being asked, and starts staying a little longer each time. and eventually, you stop counting how many times he lets himself be part of your world.

and then one afternoon—weeks later, a sky still pale from winter light—you pull out a paper you’ve been hiding all day: a perfect score. red ink, circled on the 100. you hold it out to him sheepishly while he lounges on the floor of your apartment, flipping through a children’s comic book like it’s riveting literature.

“what’s this?” he asks, taking it. his eyes scan the paper, and for the first time since you’ve known him, his eyes that usually held such a stoic, piercing gaze widens, genuinely stunned.

“you—” his voice breaks off, and then suddenly he’s up, paper still in hand, arms wrapping tight around your waist. you let out a startled laugh as your feet lift off the ground.

“you actually did it,” he says, half in disbelief, half in something that sounds suspiciously like pride. “you—god. you did it.”

you blink down at him, never before seeing him so animted. “was that… enthusiasm? from na baekjin?”

he doesn’t let you go, just presses his forehead to your shoulder with a quiet laugh.

“shut up.” but his smile doesn’t fade—not for a long time.

everything will be good, because it’s me…

and from that moment on, na baekjin finally, fully lets you in.

not just as the person who makes him laugh at photo booths or forces him into glittery karaoke rooms, or as a distraction from the union, from the weight he always carries so carefully on his own.

but as something more.

you become his outlet not just for stolen youth, but for something completely new to him—affection.

the kind he never knew how to ask for. the kind that’s soft and lingering, tucked into things like packed snacks on long study days, or the way he shrugs off his jacket and drapes it over your shoulders before you even ask.

na baekjin doesn’t say much, he was never the one for long explanations or complicated conversations.

but when he starts reaching for your hand without thinking, when he leans in a little closer on the bus station as you wait for your bus home, when he lets his gaze linger just a beat longer than it should—you know.

you’re not just something he’s letting himself want, you’re something he’s letting himself have. in the midst of re-discovering his youth, na baekjin discovers you.

cheers to youth

note: i had wayyy too much fun writing this, and creating the gifs !! do you notice how the spark gets stronger? i hope everyone appreciates this little glimpse into what life was like for our before the storm couple. hopefully this healed something in the readers of before the storm, lol. consider this my apology for the pain that bts caused >~<

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[miss-lesbian16]

Between steps and whispers.

Warning: Nothing, it's just my first time writing.

It’s a night in the bedroom; the only light comes from the faint moonlight filtering through the curtains. I’m asleep, wrapping myself in the sheets, searching for the warmth of Ambessa’s body. Not feeling her there, I slowly open my eyes and see that she’s not there. I sit up in bed, legs folded to one side, looking where Ambessa should be. I glance around looking for Ambessa, but she’s not in the bedroom.

—“Ambessa?”—I feel a bit confused and drowsy. I remember that Ambessa had an argument with Kino, so she’s training to blow off steam. I get out of bed and put on a white robe to go look for her.

I walk for a long time through the halls of Ambessa’s empire until I reach the place where she always trains.

Upon entering, I see Ambessa training in a short black top that fits her chest and exposes her abs, along with loose black pants. Her hair is braided. It doesn’t take long for her to notice my presence.

—“Honey, what are you doing awake?”—she says in a deep voice trying to hold back her fury. She turns to look me directly in the eyes; she seems really angry.

—“Same thing goes for you, Ambessa. What are you doing awake at this hour and training?”—I say in a sweet and calm voice, although a bit shaky. I step closer to Ambessa, coming within just a few centimeters of her.—“I know you and Kino had an argument, but please understand that you don’t want to go to war with the Nathan nation.”—

Ambessa clenches her jaw and fists, dropping her spear to stand face to face with me. In a cold and cutting voice she says:

—“And what do you want me to do? After offering them a trade route in exchange for my protection, should I just accept their rejection? If I can’t have that nation peacefully, I’ll take it by force.” She wipes the sweat from her forehead.— “So in a few weeks, I’ll make the Nathan nation mine; neither you nor Kino will do anything to stop me.”—

I sigh as I approach a table and grab a towel to come back to Ambessa and wipe the sweat from her face.

—“Ambessa, I'm not trying to stop you, but Kino wants you to make one last attempt not to start a war. You know he doesn’t like wars.” —I say as I begin to wipe the sweat from her forehead and cheek. Ambessa places her hand over mine.

—“I know, honey.” —Her tone sounds calmer now, more vulnerable; she closes her eyes for a moment but then furrows her brow.— “Yes, but I won’t beg for an alliance; I don’t give second chances. So all that awaits them is war.” —She says as she takes the towel from my hands and starts wiping the sweat herself.— “One day Kino will understand that not everything can be solved with words.”—

“Ambessa,” I stand on my tiptoes and place my hands on her neck to pull her closer and give her a tender and loving kiss on the lips. “Let’s talk about that tomorrow, Ambessa. Right now, we just need to go to sleep.”

Ambessa stops wiping her sweat and sighs, bending down a bit. She places her right hand on my waist, squeezing it gently, while her other hand is on my back to give me a kiss on the forehead. “Yes, you’re right, let’s go to sleep. Tomorrow will be another day, and I’ll talk to Kino about it.” Her expression turns a bit displeased at the mention of Kino, but it only lasts a few seconds. Then she looks at me calmly; it’s rare for Ambessa to show herself as a little vulnerable. However, her look changes to mischief. “Darling, since we’re both here, why don’t we train a little instead?” she says with a cheeky smile while pulling me closer to her body.

Smiling with a playful tone of voice, I respond: “Yes, I’d like that, Ambessa, but...” as my right hand moves to her cheek and the other to her shoulder. “No, I’m too sleepy to do that, so let’s just go to sleep and you can sort out your problem with Kino, okay?” I say with a pout on my lips.

Ambessa rolls her eyes and in a fun and sarcastic tone says: “Alright, let’s go to sleep then, sleepyhead,” laughing cheerfully.

Before I know it, she scoops me up in her strong arms, startling me a bit. “Ambessa!”

With a playful smile, she replies: “What’s wrong, darling? Can’t I carry my wife to our bedroom?” raising an eyebrow.

“Yes, but give me a heads-up first, Ambessa,” I say laughing as I wrap my arms around her neck. “I love you, Ambessa,” I whisper giving her a kiss on the cheek.

Ambessa kisses me slowly and sweetly on the lips. “I love you too, darling.”

Thanks for reading I hope you support me

[gyllenhaalstuff]

Heyy

been following your account for a while, i like it

Can I request a David Loki x fem reader? Where the woman is like, she kind of has issues with the way her body looks, stretch marks on her thighs, rough hands from work, trying to stay as skinny as possible and David’s comforting her? Kissing everything she doesn’t like about herself to make her feel loved? It could be a smut fic.

thank youu either way

I tried my best! Though, I strayed a little bit from some parts (sorry!)

Mind-numb

- Detective Loki

Summary: You’re feeling bad about yourself and your boyfriend tries his best to make you feel better

Warnings: Negative self talk, body image issues, short brief smut (oral f receiving), otherwise just fluffy.

Word count: 1037

Notes: I love writing requests. And I refer to Loki by his first name in this, I feel like these two are way past second name basis.

—

You were sitting on the bed in your bath towel when David came home from work. Your hair still dripping.

Dripping down your skin. The skin you oftentimes couldn’t stand. It was almost claustrophobic, suffocating.

“Hi honey,” David stuck his head through the door. Still in his uniform, hair slicked back. He looked tired but so happy to be home. 

He changed into a sweater and sweats before coming up to hug you. There was nothing worse to him than working long shifts; he hated being away from you. “I’m still wet,” you said with a smile, jokingly protesting, as David pulled you into his chest. “Don’t care,” he whispered against your hair.

You tensed in his arms. You felt out of place, not deserving. Even though David was the kindest man there ever was, you felt scared he was unhappy with you, with your body and all its imperfections.

David wasn’t good with handling feelings, neither his own nor others. The boys home didn’t really focus on teaching the kids emotional vulnerability, but he tried his best for you in times like this. “What’s wrong, baby?” he asked gently, stroking your back. “Don’t like myself,” you sniffled in response.

It broke his heart every time he saw you like this. His detective brain just wanted to solve it and make it all okay, but he couldn’t. “Well, I like you,” he whispered back, “all of you.”

“But my stretch marks and my arms and my—“ you started rambling before stopping yourself. David didn’t deserve to listen to all that.

David grabbed your hand and began kissing your knuckles. “My hands are rough,” you pointed out. Insulting yourself so if he did it, it wouldn’t hurt as much (he never did). “If I ever complain about that, just kill me on the spot… Friction never hurt anyone,” he snickered at that before saying a quick sorry. Time and place, David! he thought to himself. A quiet moment passed.

“Let me take care of you.” Even though he just got home from work, nothing calmed him more than making sure you were alright. “You don’t have to do that.” You looked at him, his dark circles making you feel bad. You should be making him dinner or rubbing out the knots in his shoulders, not burdening him.

“I don’t have to do anything,” David said and laid back against the headboard, opening his arms, inviting you to come lay down with him. You obliged and curled up next to him, resting your head on his chest.

“Thank you,” you whispered meekly. Your head rose and fell along with his breathing. Nothing could feel safer than this; nothing could feel more like home. “If it was up to me,” David started, “You’d never worry about your body again.” He knew this wouldn’t change a thing, but he wanted you to know how he felt.

His words went in one ear and out the other, your brain still stirring. “But I don’t want you to lose your attraction to me.” No, that was it. David almost chuckled; the scenario was too absurd. “I’m purposely not looking at the arch of your back right now so I won’t get turned on,” he confessed, hoping that might register in you. And it did a little.

You looked up with him, trying to look unbothered, but your eyes had gotten some sparkle back. “Really?” 

David shrugged, jokingly playing nonchalant before telling you yes. You finally smiled a little, and David thought he might die from relief. 

“In a perfect world I’d be touching you all the time.” His hands grazed the curve of your waist as he spoke. “I could never get enough of you.” His hand lingered on your hip before giving it a squeeze. His thumb stroked your stretch marks as his mind ran wild.

Your heart was beginning to lighten. His hands on you were the ultimate validation. David looked down on you before grabbing your chin, tilting your head up, and kissing you. “I’ve missed you so much,” he mumbled against your lips. “I’ve missed you too.”

“Is this making you feel better?” he asked, his worst nightmare being crossing a boundary. You nodded; you were definitely feeling better. When you didn’t like yourself, it felt so nice knowing that David did.

You ended up in his spot with your back against one of the pillows while David let his hands roam your thighs and hips. Sometimes his mouth replaced one of them to kiss and nip at your skin. “You’re too pretty,” he repeated between kisses, not wanting your mind to slip back into the darkness. 

Him worshiping you made you blush. Both because of how flattered you were and also because a tiny part of you felt bad for him. A part that would go away completely, for a while at least, once he removed your towel completely and moved his mouth from your outer to your inner thighs. 

His stubble scratched against your sensitive skin, and you could see why the friction from your rough, calloused hands never bothered him.

David would rather get drunk on you than anything else. His exhausted, overworked brain finally took a backseat and let him do whatever he wanted, which was always this. He was almost sure that if he were to get selected for a randomized drug test at work after eating you out, he’d be fired once the results came back.

His hands grabbed desperately at your hips and waist as he buried his tongue in you. And after you came, he carefully licked you clean before kissing the marks from the harsh grip he had held on you.

“You’re too nice,” you told him once he laid back down beside you. “Don’t think I didn’t need that just as much as you did,” he said back.

You two shared a late pasta dinner on the couch that night. He cooked it while you laid on the couch watching mind-numbing reality TV. And when you had finished your meal, you fell asleep on his shoulder while watching the new Netflix true crime documentary, and his heart tripled in size. He kissed your forehead and carried you to bed.

[shieldmaidencreative]

Shadows Move In Where Faith Used to Be: Chinese Apps and the American People

There is so much to write about at this moment, it was rather hard to for me to narrow down a topic. Fortunately, in the past couple days, a new story hit the media out of nowhere that made the decision for me. All that being said: have you heard about DeepSeek?

It’s a Chinese generative AI app, based upon the same precepts as ChatGPT. Literally it was built using that software. The claim is that it took ~$6 million to make, compared to the running costs of about half a billion for the other generative AI models. Once this news hit the market, the blue chips crashed and shook the US tech world.

There are plenty of fun side topics that we’ll cover with this one. For the first part, I’ll go into two of my favorite things: schadenfreude and hubris. The past few weeks, schadenfreude has been getting me through the news cycle. I know it’s not a virtue, trust me. But I am only human, and with the depressing news we have lately, it’s sort of been a good feeling to see the people who made assumptions get wet-fish slapped with reality. You’ll notice, with the flurry of Executive Orders the American President has made lately, he didn’t manage to leave the Ukraine war in the first 24 hours as promised, nor has he done anything to lower the price of groceries, eggs, or gas. And, in fact, he has said he won’t (although he says he will lower drill restrictions in protected areas, that won’t drive gas costs down; though, if there was more competition from green initiatives that he’s cutting, it would). I just bring those specific topics up because the people who voted for him claimed it was due to those topics, and they are already dead on arrival. As the rest of us knew they would be. So seeing the inevitable happen, has been the spark of joy I’ve been taking from an overwhelmingly dark time.

The other bit, hubris, is aimed directly at the tech bro overlord douche cadre. I’ve always thought to be a billionaire is a sign of a personal failing; it means you didn’t take care of those around you on the way up. And if you continue to be a billionaire, it means that you still aren’t taking care of people like you should. They could use the dearth of wealth to solve, or nearly solve, all issues we have. But they don’t. And now that we are in this new administration, they immediately bowed down, got in line, and showed us their true natures. Happy for years to stand quietly behind the scenes pulling strings, they have completely capitulated to our new system and tossed out equality or any other moral standing, in the hopes of favor and succor from above. And man, that really made me angry. They don’t even pretend to want to help society now. Google announced yesterday it’s changing its maps to show the Gulf of Mexico inaccurately renamed to Gulf of America, Facebook is going to stop trying to limit hate speech and disinformation at all, and Elon….well, look at that goose stepper up there. He’s just missing the mustache.

So when China announced DeepSeek, I immediately had two responses: wariness because I know why China is doing this, but then there was schadenfreude at the tech sector freaking out. These guys thought they were untouchable, they put themselves on pantheons and thought they finally made it. They could show us their matching Lex Luthor tattoos finally! They own everything and there’s nothing we can do about it!

And then…BAM. China, playing its long game of stealing and silence, tossed this embarrassing grenade right in their sausage fest. MUAHAHAHAHA! Their stocks tanked, billions were lost. The initiative they just announced last week for “AI dominance” suddenly looked, in the daylight, as though it had gotten dressed in a dark room and didn’t check the mirror on the way out. Wait, you all need half a trillion? They did it with 6 million! They kicked the stool out from under the American tech bros, and man was it nice to see them fall.

I also find it vindicating that there are huge moral quandaries with generative AI that haven’t been addressed at all by the government or the tech oligarchy: how they scrape the data of humans to create their content, but don’t compensate them for it. How their output is displacing the careers of real humans, without compensating the system it’s stealing from. How it takes a huge amount of power to run the systems. All of these issues may hit those dudes differently, now that China is wearing the shoes they’ve been sporting.

However…now that we’ve gotten past the flash of “weeeeee”, I’ll move on to my larger emotional response. If you’re American, this isn’t something to truly celebrate. It will be another vector for China to steal our ideas, code, and initiative; after all, that’s how they were able to make DeepSeek in the first place. There’s even evidence that they are using black market NVIDIA chips to make it, since they are restricted from buying them. This comes shortly after the revelations about the two 6th generation fighter jets they purport to have, which if the claims are true, means they have beat us to market. Again, this is based off of data that they stole from us (I remember they hacked the F-35 program while I worked there, and stole plans. And it certainly wasn’t the only time). They excel at taking other people’s ideas and building on them, and we are seeing those chickens come home to roost. For years, they have been thinking strategically about global markets, while we continued to only think tactically.

First we exported our manufacturing to them, hollowing out our middle class at the enrichment of the few. Trickle down economics somehow still hasn’t worked, in the 40 years since we started trying to get it to work. Any minute now, right? So our populace is unhappier and more tired, and broker, than ever before. China has executed extremely high levels of industrial espionage against us, and continues to do so, at a prolific scale. They’ve infiltrated our extremely sensitive government systems time and time again. And that doesn’t even include the actual spies that have infiltrated our universities, to pick our brains about our newest ideas.

So now, we have the results coming to market. 6th gen fighters, DeepSeek, and TikTok. I was going to write about the TikTok ban a few weeks ago, but wanted to see things play out. I’m now extremely happy I did, because it pairs perfectly with current events.

TikTok is a dangerous tool, as the government has been saying (and the American people ignoring), for years. It’s no coincidence that the version China allows its own citizens to use is far different from our own. It’s meant to dull us down and occupy our attention, so that we don’t accomplish anything with drive. It’s a time suck. It pushes disinformation. It ruins our attention span. It also gathers massive amounts of data on us. I personally predict that at some point, China will use that data to make digital AI agents to “befriend” users and then use PSYOPs on them to further degrade their loyalty to America and one another. I believe that they will use the data from DeepSeek to do the same; it gathers an incredible amount of data from the moment you download the app to your phone.

The TikTok ban, which Trump originally proposed (and I supported!) has now been stymied by Trump. He claims Microsoft are in talks to acquire the American arm of the business, and we shall see what comes of it. It’s been turned back on for American users. But what’s been fascinating to me has been watching the response online of the average user.

Overwhelmingly, I have seen Americans who use TikTok blatantly say, “So what if they have my data. American companies already have it all and sell it to anyone who wants it.” And you know what? Solid point.

This is a sign of the breech of trust between American government and its citizens. For many years now, I’ve been a vocal supporter of privacy laws like the EU has, and of harsh penalties for companies that fail to prevent security breaches. Neither has gained any traction in the US. Since the government believes its job is no longer to protect the average citizen, but instead to provide the opportunity to any sap who wants to bilk a buck from his neighbor the protection to do so, Americans are hugely data compromised.

Many times a year I am notified that some site or another has been breached. Companies are very poor custodians of customer data nearly across the board, and there is nearly no restriction on the data they can collect. There was just a huge data breach of an app schools use called “Powerschool”, announced last week. That data, among other things, included Social Security numbers of students and teachers, affected up to 70 million users, and was all achieved by one admin’s compromised credentials being used to login. As someone with software development and security experience, there are so many red flags here. Why was ONE lowly admin able to access the social security numbers of that many people? Why was no one alerted at that massive of a pull? Why were they stored in unencrypted areas, instead of being accessed individually with a key? And, why will nothing be done about it? This stuff is not rocket science; it’s lazy engineering because they companies don’t have the incentive.

If we made it so that there were fines and jail time for stolen data, security would improve immediately. But they get away with it. If someone came in my house, and stole my social security card, they would face fines and jail time. Why should the digital data be any different? If a bank lost my money due to their poor security, I would be protected. Why is this different?

In my option, the American government has done a terrible job of protecting us from this. Part of that is they don’t feel the pressure; part of it is laziness; part of it is the fact that most of Congress has no clue how technology works because they are dinosaurs and lawyers. But I also think the tech sector has done a terrible job of being good citizens as well. And now, guess what’s happened: They’ve done such a bad job, that people think China has their interests at heart more than America. And for me, it’s hard to say they seem totally wrong. China certainly doesn’t have their interests at heart, not at all. But it’s getting harder to be convinced that our own country’s government cares about them, either. And that is so dangerous.

In this moment, the users have the power, and they don’t realize it. We need to have people who understand current issues step up to the plate to protect us. We need to be on the same team again, and by that I mean ALL American citizens need to be protected, not just the rich. In this moment of chaos and terror, I’m not sure what will happen. But at some point, Trump used to be convinced that TikTok and China were dangerous. And he need to remember that they still are. We also need to stand with our true allies again, and make data and security standards with them. If we don’t stand with them, someone else will, and nature abhors a vacuum. I don’t like this isolationist stance we are moving toward; the world is too interconnected for it to be feasible. I have hope that this will be realized again at some point.

Please don’t download those apps. Please don’t give your data and your attention to bad actors. And while we’re at it, contact your Congress people and let them know your concerns about data, and about the overreach of our tech sector. And if you care about any of these topics, please consider helping do something to turn this around. Run for office, use your voice, speak up. We need people who care about change to make it; it’s happened before and the time is perfect for it to happen again.

As always, thanks for reading. Please add me to your RSS feed and share, and contact me if you like. I’d love to hear from you. Times are scary but not impossible. We are in it together. And, I hope you enjoy seeing the tech bro coalition with their bloody teeth this week (I sure am). Like Mike Tyson says, ”Everyone has a plan till they get punched in the mouth.” Maybe they’ll realize they need to take care of Americans if they want Americans to take care of them. Or maybe we need to make them realize it.

[aionlinemoney]

Let’s focus on understanding Common Misconceptions About Artificial Intelligence

In today’s era, it is very important to be informed about AI. advancement and upgradation of information in our minds are crucial to getting complete knowledge about AI. Artificial Intelligence (AI) is often seen as a god who knows everything Or a superhero / a supervillain. Some people may think AI will solve our problems and opposite of this some people may also think that AI will create many new and dangerous problems.

So let’s clear up some important and common misconceptions about Artificial Intelligence technologies. We’ll discuss the myths related to ai surrounding it and explain what AI can and cannot do.

The Rise of Misconceptions about AI 

 

1. In the Future AI Will Steal All Our Jobs

Imagine an AI robot is sitting on a corporate office chair with corporate dressing like a handsome hulk who steals your job, the hearts of all office girls with a cup of coffee and you are watching him from outside the office window. But wait just imagine it because it won’t happen.

“AI Will Steal All Our Jobs “ is one of the most common misconceptions about artificial intelligence is that it’s here to rob us of our livelihoods. While AI can automate different repetitive tasks and help many of us. Therefore it creates new opportunities. Now just imagine Ai as your friend or colleague who helps you in your job such as taking all the boring stuff or work which are not creative or which can be repeated tasks so you can focus on creative projects 

2. AI Has Feelings

Let’s talk about this: AI doesn’t cry when you shout at Siri, nor does it feel sad like a human after wasting his feeling emotions on his ex. This is one of the most persistent misconceptions about artificial intelligence, probably because movies make robots seem emotional.

Like in movies, they can also show robots kissing each other or simply one robot falls in love with a human girl. Spoiler alert: Your vacuum cleaner doesn’t love you.

3. AI Knows Everything

There are different common misconceptions about artificial intelligence People often believe AI is omniscient (well-known), but it’s not. It’s incredibly good at specific tasks but clueless outside its training. If you ask AI to summarize Shakespeare, it might excel. Ask it to explain your girlfriend’s mind or how long your relationship will last. It will lag so This is also a common misconceptions about artificial intelligence.

4. AI Will Dominate the World

Now some people may imagine that an AI robot may become prime minister and bring rules for example. marriage will be banned. Is AI dangerous for the future? Not really. While some people worry about robots taking over, AI today is not smart enough to do that. It’s just here to help you with things like recommending TV shows or making tasks easier. So, no need to worry—your toaster isn’t plotting anything! It’s just a common misconceptions about artificial intelligence. 

5. AI is Magic

You type a prompt on AI such as Make me a millionaire and then the AI will say Abra ka dabra etc and guess what you are now a millionaire, now stop imagining! It’s nothing just Another common misconceptions about artificial intelligence is that it’s some kind of sorcery. The reality? AI is powered by data, algorithms, and a lot of coding—no wands involved.

 

Different Myths Related to AI

 

1. AI Can Think Like Humans

A  common misconceptions about artificial intelligence or myth related to AI is that it thinks like humans. Now lot of people may think AI can also feel emotions, like love and sadness. But in reality, AI is as emotionless as rocks or snakes (not yours). 

If AI had feelings, it’d probably be the friend who never gets excited about pizza—like, who doesn’t love pizza, right? If AI had feelings, it’d probably be the friend who never gets excited about pizza—like, who doesn’t love pizza, right? Some folks believe AI can make all decisions on its own. Well, AI might be good with numbers, but when it comes to choosing pizza toppings, it’s just as confused as we are. It still needs a little help!

2. AI is Always Right

The second common misconceptions about artificial intelligence or myth related to AI is that Many people think AI is always right, but it’s not. AI can make mistakes, especially if it’s fed bad data. Ever get a product recommendation and think, “Why would I ever need this?” It’s like your ex-girlfriend suggesting you get back together—AI can get things wrong too!

3. AI is Too Expensive

Sure, some AI systems cost a fortune, but many tools are affordable. These common misconceptions about artificial intelligence or myths related to AI prevent small businesses from exploring AI benefits, even when tools like chatbots can save them time and money. Remember, AI is a productivity tool, not like your friends who borrow money and then forget to pay you back. AI helps you get things done efficiently, without leaving you hanging for what you pay!

 

Is AI Dangerous for the Future?

 

1. Ethical Concerns

Imagine your driving you’re bike at a slow speed with a helmet it’s very nice and safe to ride but if you are riding your bike at 200+ speed without any helmet it’s not safe it is very dangerous. It’s completely on you how you ride your bike, like this The question “Is AI dangerous for the future? depend on how a person is driving or using AI. often stems from ethical worries. Bias in AI models and misuse of data are legitimate concerns, but these issues can be addressed through responsible development and regulation.

2. Job Automation

Yes, AI automates jobs, but it also creates new roles—from AI trainers to data analysts. It’s not stealing jobs; it’s reshuffling them. Think of it as job evolution, not extinction.

3. Weaponization of AI

A valid concern when asking “Is AI dangerous for the future?” is its potential misuse in weapons. This is why governments and organizations need strict regulations to ensure AI serves humanity, not harms it. 

 

What AI Can and Cannot Do

Understanding what AI can and cannot do helps separate reality from fiction. Here’s a quick rundown:

What AI Can Do:

Analyze massive datasets in seconds.

Automate mundane tasks like sorting emails.

Assist in creative processes by generating ideas or drafts.

What AI Cannot Do:

Feel emotions or form relationships (sorry, sci-fi fans).

Understand context the way humans do.

Replace human intuition and creativity completely.

 

Examples of AI Myths

 

1. AI is Sentient

This is one of the most laughable examples of AI myths. People often think AI has awareness. If AI were sentient, it would probably just ask for a break from all the data processing.

2. AI Can Replace Artists

Another example of AI myths is the fear that it will wipe out creativity. While AI can assist in generating content, true artistry remains a human domain. AI might paint a picture, but it’ll never capture the soul.

These are some myths related to AI or common misconceptions about artificial intelligence

 

Why Busting Misconceptions Matters

In today’s world, everyone uses AI for different tasks and information collection purposes so it becomes necessary to understand  Common misconceptions about artificial intelligence lead to unnecessary fears and unrealistic expectations. By addressing myths related to AI, we can approach its capabilities with clarity and optimism. AI isn’t a monster under the bed; it’s a tool we can harness responsibly.

Conclusion

Artificial intelligence is a game-changer, but it’s not the dystopian nightmare some make it out to be. By debunking common misconceptions about artificial intelligence, clarifying myths related to AI, and understanding what AI can and cannot do, we can embrace its potential without fear. So, next time someone asks, “Is AI dangerous for the future?” just smile and say, “Only if it starts making dad jokes!”

[jjungkooksthighs]

Perhaps I saw something questionable that could aid to your solving of this mysterious case. But I won’t do shit if you don’t do something for me. Yoongi leers.

She doesn't hear the male. Her hands wrap around her alpha's back, hugging him tighter than she ever has. A-alpha.. her voice breaks with the force of the sob that makes it's way through. I.. please.. believe me. I.. I don't know how that mark got there.. I really, really don't!

I really don't.. Desperation grips her voice in her need to hear him say something. Anything. She doesn't feel him reciprocate the hug, nor does she hear him acknowledge her words. She accepts it, silently. She.. she doesn't deserve his warmth right now. Not when she left him there, cold in the cruel void her absence must have entailed. She couldn't imagine how she would have felt if he ever did that. No.. he wouldn't do that. He isn't a bad mate. She is. And.. she has to make up for it.

Her body is wracked by furious tremors as she clutches onto him so tight that red, bloody lines are left in her wake as she tries to cling to him.

He doesn’t even grimace at the pain her nails leave down his back, her arms delving under his so she can grip his shoulders and pull her front into him.

She’s about ready to let the scream that has been nursed inside her out if he doesn’t do something; or rather, anything.

He hasn’t pulled her off him, so she should take the small victory where she can, but it still isn’t enough. She needs him. She needs what he has always given her:

Everything.

She tries to tell him so, but words just aren’t coming to her now. Her emotions are running rampant and they are stealing her tongue’s will to move.

While he doesn’t speak, his golden irises are on nothing but her as she attempts to explain herself to him. He waits until her voice has broken off into pieces and is too brittle to continue, and then he says:

There is a reason for all things, Lily. Just like- he glances down at their joined, bloodied digits- just like you had a reason for rejecting our bond. Rejecting me.

Sadness morphs the words until they sound so unfamiliar and so unlike him that even she doesn’t recognize what she’s hearing.

He’s never sounded so downcast before.

[lizseyi]

How Can You Minimise The Risks Associated With Taking Out A Short-Term Loan - CashCompare

To reiterate a theme that we have previously written about here at CashCompare, a short-term loan is not, in and of itself, entirely a risky proposition, nor something that will solve all your financial problems. Instead, much depends on how such a loan is used, and how it fits in with the broader scheme of how you manage your money.

So, with all that in mind, here are some of the steps you can take to reduce the degree of risk a short-term loan might present to you.

Borrow as little money as you can

This might seem obvious to some of our blog readers, but it is worth re-emphasising nonetheless: a short term loan is definitely not the kind of thing where you should borrow more money than you strictly need, just because you theoretically can borrow that much money.

After all, all funds that you borrow will need to be repaid. And with short-term loans potentially having APR rates of as much as 1,500% or more, it can be a seriously risky course of action to take out a loan for anything more than you need. This rate is a representative example; actual rates may vary depending on the lender and your circumstances.

As part of this, you should do everything you can to exhaust other financial avenues before you depend on a loan. Are there, for example, any inessential possessions of yours that could be sold to raise funds? Perhaps there are friends or family members who you could borrow money from, or maybe you could cut out certain things from your life – such as paid streaming subscriptions, a daily coffee, or going out to the pub or bar every Saturday – to help you find that vital cash?

Never commit to a loan that you know you won’t be able to pay back

This really is one of the ultimate rules of borrowing, that should be set out in bold red text: do not, ever, take out a loan if you are already aware you won’t be able to repay it.

If you do commit to such a loan and inevitably find yourself in trouble later, you will be in a much worse financial position than the one you are in right now. So, applying for a short-term loan out of desperation isn’t going to be a course of action that will serve you well.

Even if your situation genuinely seems desperate and you have investigated all other options you can think of, it would be a much better idea for you to seek help from a non-profit debt counselling agency, such as StepChange or National Debtline.

Of course, “life happens”, and you might be confident that you can repay a loan at the time you commit to it, only for a later change of circumstances to affect your ability to keep on top of your borrowing. But even if that happens, you should contact the lender immediately, so that you can agree on a feasible way for you to complete your repayments.

Compare loans online with the help of a reputable comparison website

When it comes to the world of short-term loans, there are direct lenders, but there are also credit brokers, and it is important to be aware of the distinction between the two.

As the term suggests, a direct lender is exactly that – a lender. They may be able to present you with a short-term loan option, but if they are the only lender you have approached, you will have little way of knowing whether an alternative lender out there could give you a better loan deal with a more competitive interest rate. That is unless, of course, you approach lenders individually, one by one.

But why should you do that, when you can instead go to one place? This is where the right credit broker can come in. Here at CashCompare, we are a credit broker and comparison site that maintains relationships with a range of leading lenders.

You apply through us, using a single no-obligation loan request form, and we will then get to work on sifting through the available loan products from our featured lenders. This process will make it easier for you to find and commit to a loan that represents the lowest possible risk to you.

So, if you are looking to compare loans online, why do it the slower, more laborious, and potentially riskier way? Our quote request form takes just two minutes to complete and submit, and you will be under no obligation to accept any loan we present to you through this process – a further step that will help minimise your risk.

Please note that loan approval is not guaranteed and depends on individual circumstances and the lender’s criteria.

We advocate responsible borrowing and advise all our readers to consider their financial situation carefully before taking out a loan.

"Warning: Late repayment can cause you serious money problems. Always consider if borrowing is the right option for you and ensure you can repay your loan." For help, go to moneyhelper.org.uk.

[extremely-judgemental]

But I don't see Nesta as a "hero". I see her as a leader (doesn't necessarily mean politics) and I don't think She could be herself ever in the Night Court. That's why I want her to leave. And unfortunately, they would never let her unless she has enough power to scare them away forever and secure herself. (Because Rhysand wants to use her for her magic.) So that's why I think she should be a queen.

@ashryver2022 I’m not calling you out here. I understand your reasoning and many have similar thoughts. The original post was addressing the ones who claim Nesta deserves to be a High Lady because she has a magical tattoo that connects to Dusk or that she saved Midgard and by extension, Prythian, and all her other heroic acts. I wasn’t going to touch this other side of the argument but let’s talk about that too.

I’m sorry, I have to disagree. Nesta is not a leader. None of these characters are. They are all solo players and meant to inspire others, and hence, heroes. When every one of them is lifted from the same archetype, it’s hard to tell this difference.

Even in WAR, the IC are positioned as a band of heroes who love to solve the problem on their own (as seen in MAF) but went out of their way, lowered themselves for the sake of Prythian, and played along with the other courts. Rhysand and Feyre making bargains with the Death Gods, Nesta luring the King of Hybern during the battle, Elain and Nesta killing him together. Everything supports this. In SF, Nesta inspires the priestesses, she sacrifices herself for Gwyneth and Emerie.

However, I do agree that Nesta can never be free in Night. But you're also missing my point. No amount of power will help her free herself. She is the only one who could make or wield Made weapons. She already had more magic than any of them and they locked her in a tower because they couldn’t understand it and they couldn’t control her.

Nesta's problem is not lack of power or title. It's mental. She believes she doesn't deserve a second chance and what she has in Night is more than what she deserves. Becoming a queen isn't going to erase that guilt she carries with her, nor is it going to earn her the respect of the IC. If anything, her newfound power and title will be another reason for IC to watch her closely.

And the HOFAS bonus chapter implies exactly that, how the IC view her and her choices. It portrays Nesta as someone who doesn’t put people around her first, as someone who goes with her feelings and gut, whether it’s right or wrong is secondary. Whereas every other member of the IC, the ‘hero’, put their own first. After they are safe and secure, they will care about the others.

That’s her crime, that she didn’t care for the safety of her sisters and her ‘family’. Had she ensured they survived no matter what, none of them would be competing to kill her first. Becoming a High Lady will be seen as a problem not because she wields as much or more power than IC but because she is ‘impulsive’ and ‘incompetent’ as of now.

So let’s say, Nesta becomes a ruler and has to leave Night as a result. She will be accompanied by her mate who is Rhysand’s loyal lapdog first. Cassian is a firm believer that Nesta is on the wrong whenever she doesn’t accommodate his family. Yes, a healthy distance will definitely help but it requires a lot of introspection that is lacking in almost all the characters in the series. Moreover, the pair had that distance during the hike. Cassian watched Nesta suffer and he still believed she needed to repent. He’s more likely to be her warden in her new court and report to Rhysand and Feyre on her performance. Only, Dusk will be her new cage, a cage nonetheless.

No matter where Nesta goes, no matter how much power she accumulates, it won’t change her situation unless others start respecting her as a person first.

So no. A title isn’t going to save her. A title isn’t her ticket to freedom. Nesta becoming a High Lady or Queen is as meaningless and performative as everything else.

The reluctant hero trope is truly exhausting. Not in fiction but in the fandoms. Granted this trope has been used as a badge of honour and virtue in characters all the time, readers are forgetting that not every character needs to end with a position of power to take charge of their life. Especially when nothing, I mean NOTHING, in the character suggests they want it at any level or deserve it.

Yes, the point of the trope is for the hero to not want power, but do they even need to get to the top of the food chain? Does getting a title mean anything at least in the narrative? Katniss Everdeen is an icon in this trope. She was the face of a rebellion in her world. She didn’t want it but she needed to be and in the end, it did have an impact in her world. Bilbo Baggins definitely did not want to leave his comfortable life to start on an adventure but his journey changed his world. And ykw, they both end with no titles and are still a hero.

I am sick of seeing the High Lady of Dusk propaganda in this fandom. Nesta has no interest in politics though she is trained from a young age. She has shown no interest in the fae world either. So what, since she doesn’t want to be a queen, she deserves to be one?

Why does she need to be a queen anyway? Give me one good reason how it will affect her growth or the narrative if she gets a title? She will get to flaunt to Feyre and Rhysand? You realise SJM is writing the books and Nesta will never leave the sister she ‘owes’ her life to? A title isn’t going to fix the trainwreck that her life is, instead it will be used to manipulate her more. Now she not only owes Feyre but also everyone else because it is her responsibility, which is exactly what they did during the war.

Also, if Nesta shouldn't be with someone like Eris because it's what her dead mother would have wanted, then she wanted this for Nesta too? Wouldn't this be traumatic and triggering for her?

Besides, Nesta already falls under this trope as is. She doesn’t need a fucking title to become any more of a hero than she already is. Don’t wish to turn a character into something they are not and that will stunt their growth (unless that's what you're going for) just because you can’t think of any other possibilities. This whole propaganda proves that writers like SJM have completely brainwashed the readers into believing that empowerment only comes from a fancy title whether it means a thing or not.

[teecupangel]

A Desmond who feel for older than he is due to the knowledge that his ancestors memories gave him. Time travels back to any period and just decides to become a fisherman. He accidently becomes know as that old man with wisdom that fishes all the time even tho he isn't actual that old. Some people assume he just has very good features that make him seem younger than he is. Just a thought I had at 12 am again :0

I don’t know if you mean that I get to choose where he timetravels to or if you mean that he can freely time travel but think of the hilary of:

Desmond: the time-hopping fisherman

Everyone who sees him just thinks he’s some chill old(ish) man who likes to fish in the weirdest places.

Have a small fic for your 12 am musing XD

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Altaïr always sees him in Acre docks fishing and he doesn’t even know if people are allowed to fish there. The guards ignore him even though he heard whispers from the people near the docks that they all believe he’s… well… not all there in the head. Altaïr never approached him at all but, when he needed to hide after assassinating Sibrand, the fisherman simply smiled at him and patted the space next to him which, coincidentally, had an unused fishing rod. The guards didn’t even bother to look in their direction, too used to ignoring the fisherman. They didn’t say anything to one another and Altaïr simply said ‘my thanks’ before leaving once the coast was clear. But then he saw him in Cyprus, fishing as usual and that caught Altaïr’s interest. Because he kept on fishing even when Altaïr used the Apple to command everyone to return to their homes.

There was a fisherman who always fished on Tiber Island. Ezio had observed him for a few days just to be sure he wasn’t a Borgia spy or anything of the kind but all the fisherman did was fish for the entire day and then go to a small home on Tiber Island once the sky became too dark to continue to fish. Ezio wasn’t even sure if he caught any fish but he was just a harmless fisherman so Ezio didn’t bother him. Then a few of his recruits suddenly started getting better at observing and they all say that they got ‘tips’ from the lonely fisherman of Tiber Island. That caught Ezio's interest but he was too busy trying to dismantle the Borgia's influence in Rome to do anything about it by then. When Ezio finally talked to him after returning from Spain, finally ending his feud with the Borgia with Cesare’s ‘accident’, the fisherman turned to smile at him and patted the space next to him. Ezio sat and took the extra fishing rod that the fisherman gave him as he asked for the fisherman’s name. The fisherman was quiet for a moment before he finally answered, “Nowadays, I have so many names I don’t remember all of them anymore. But I guess… to you? I will always be Desmond.”

Ratonhnhaké:ton assumed he was part of the homestead. Just one of the many people trying to build a new life here on the homestead. Ratonhnhaké:ton introduced himself because it was the polite thing to do and because he was curious about all the people who made their life here in Achilles’ homestead. He was not one of the many people Ratonhnhaké:ton invited. He had been here even before Ratonhnhaké:ton and had even given Ratonhnhaké:ton fish to eat while he had been hunting during the time he stayed in Achilles’ stables. Now, it became a habit to fish with the lone fisherman at least once every time he was on the homestead. Fishing became a way for Ratonhnhaké:ton to simply breathe and rest for a bit. To remember the beauty of the world. So when Achilles told him that the homestead never had a fisherman, Ratonhnhaké:ton had wondered if he had been talking to a spirit this entire time. Yet, the fisherman was flesh and bones when he held his wrist. His skin was warm and he looked at Ratonhnhaké:ton with curious light brown eyes that seemed to glow in the sunlight. Ratonhnhaké:ton finally asked what he was doing here in the homestead and the fisherman simply replied with a smile, “Just fishing.”

Edward Kenway had seen the weirdest shite but this… this was strange. “What are you doing here, old man?!” “Fishing!” Yes, Edward could see that. That wasn’t the point. The point was… “You’re fishing in an abandoned ship covered in fog!” The laughter he heard was light and absent of any panic. That day, Edward Kenway wondered if they had accidentally boarded a ghost ship and they were now cursed as they found no gold in the ship but the fisherman stayed in Jackdaw and continued to fish even when Jackdaw gets boarded. Everyone just agrees that he was some kind of sea curse and that trying to throw him overboard would bring them bad luck.

Shay saw him every time he was in the homestead. A lone fisherman that always seemed to be fishing no matter the time or the weather. Liam ignored him so Shay ignored him as well. Until he returned from Lisbon, shaking and angry. The red haze in his mind had been so thick he barely heard someone call to him. Yet, he stopped and turned to where the voice had come from. It was the fisherman. He patted the space next to him and Shay wasn’t sure what made him walk toward him. The softness of his voice? The kindness in his smile? The understanding in his eyes? Shay didn’t know at all. His hands trembled as he took the extra fishing rod the fisherman handed to him. And Shay just… fished. In the warm silence between them, he could feel everything he tried to hold in finally let go. Tears fell from his eyes as his shoulders begin to tremble. He felt the fisherman’s hand rub his back as, for the first time since his father died, Shay cried once more.

Every time Arno leave the Parisian Brotherhood’s headquarters from the sewers, he would see him. A fisherman just… fishing away in the Seine river. Arno wasn’t sure if he was even part of the Brotherhood. None of the other Assassins that Arno worked with ever talked to him and he never saw the fisherman enter the sewer or even Café Théâtre. Arno just ignored him. Until Élise left him, too focused on avenging her father to even take the time to listen to Arno. And the Brotherhood… well… Arno had been debating if he should even report to the Brotherhood anymore. He just felt… so lost. Maybe that had been the reason why he finally approached the fisherman and asked him what he was fishing for. The fisherman simply patted the space next to him and handed Arno an extra fishing rod when the young Assassin sat. Instead of drinking the day away, Arno fished with a man he didn’t even know the name of, listening to the fisherman as he talked about a man he used to know who was faced with an impossible choice.

It was Jacob who approached him. The fisherman of Thames, they call him. All the gangs ignored him. Just another one of the poor men of London. But Jacob had been curious. He wanted the Rooks to be more than just any gang. He wanted them to be like the Ezio Auditore’s Brotherhood that his father used to tell him and Evie when they were children. But less restricted by the tenets. A… friendly neighborhood gang just like how his father described them when they were still young and didn’t know better. No matter what the books and journals Evie read say about the real Italian Brotherhood, Jacob didn’t care about that. His Rooks was based on what they heard when they were kids, not the brutal reality they live in. So, Jacob tried to talk to the fisherman to see what his deal was. If he was trying to fish to survive, he’d offer him a place with the Rooks. Maybe even get him something to eat that didn’t smell like Thames for once. Jacob and the fisherman sat for hours, fishing together. When Jacob returned to the train, Evie saw the expression on his face and asked what had happened with concern in her tone. Both Evie and Henry only grew more confused when Jacob replied with wide eyes, “I think I just talked to God, Evie.”

It was shameful for Bayek to admit it but it took a while before he noticed him. At first, it had been because he had been too focused on avenging Khemu. Then it was because he was busy trying to help Aya. But now… Well, he was still busy but it was hard not to notice the fisherman humming the same tune that has been stuck in his head ever since he left Siwa. He didn’t even realize that he had heard it from the fisherman until now. So when he asked what the fisherman was doing and all he got was that the fisherman was fishing, Bayek couldn’t help the exasperation in his voice as he said, “You’re fishing… in an oasis… in the middle of the desert.” The fisherman simply shrugged and replied that he wanted to try it out. Bayek couldn’t help but wonder if he was actually talking to a hallucination and there was really no fisherman and no oasis at all.

“I’m sorry, I know this is a very important conversation and all of that but who is that?” “That… is the fisherman.” “The fisherman?” “Yes.” “That’s all you’re going to give me?” “Yes.” “And you’re not going to explain why he’s fishing straight into that strange water-like gate that you just told me leads to Atlantis?” “……… Yes.” “… I need a drink.” “So do I.”

Eivor frowned as she entered an empty bureau, no Hytham at sight at all. She walked out of his small bureau and looked around. It was easy enough to find Hytham with his Hidden One robes. What she did not expect was finding him by the docks, fishing with a person she had never seen before. Perhaps someone who came to Ravensthorpe while she was away? She walked towards them and Hytham immediately turned to smile at her, asking her to sit and fish with them. She had wanted to say no, to tell him that she was looking for him to give him more medallions. Instead, she sat on Hytham’s other side and took the fishing rod that Hytham gave her. They spent the entire afternoon fishing and, by the end of it, Eivor wondered if perhaps one of the old gods have come to fish in Ravensthorpe.

(If it looks strange that this is not in chronological order but instead ordered by release, that’s because Desmond is time-hopping in that exact order)

[findroleplay]

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[arisewanekosuki]

Dreamer in Teyvat -Night 1- (3/?)

You approach Teleport Waypoint. You hold your breath and slowly reach to the structure. You put your hand on it, you expected its surface to be cold but it was warm. Looking at it you notice that- Nothing have changed. You put your other hand on it and nothing. You didn't hear any sound, it didn't light up in any way, nothing. It doesn't work because you don’t have a map? Or it just won’t work for you? Or maybe it did work but without unlocking another one you won't know for now. If you find another Teleport Waypoint, it won’t hurt to check it. You approach the end of the cliff. You are amazed by the view. You can see Sangonomiya Shrine, also you're able to see Statue of Seven on other end of the island. This is incredible, you can feel the wind, you can hear the sound of waterfalls and some birds. You can even touch those bubbles that fly around, it’s fun to poke them.

On your right there is teleport, but this one won’t help you too much, the other one that this teleport is connected to, is not far away on your left side. Behind the teleport there is this place where this terrible puzzle was, but it seems the puzzle is already solved. You pass teleport to get closer to the small ruins. There you can see many books, bag, shield and backpack. There is no weapon sadly. Checking bag and backpack you only find like 100 mora. You’re probably won’t be able to buy too much with that. You wonder, if it’s really okay to take those things but you don’t see any campfire, nor anything to suggest that someone is coming here at all. Well, at least you got something to put things in, that you'll gather in your travels! There is no reason to go back to the beach or try the new shield against slimes, so with excitement step, you go back to the path that will lead you to the Bourou Village.

There is bridge, it looks sturdy enough to let you cross it. At the end of the bridge you see one of Sangonomiya Samurai. You put foot on the bridge, to make sure it won't break when you try cross it. You can see the Samurai watching your every move. Holding onto line you slowly cross the bridge. When you finally approach the Samurai, he loudly say -“ Halt! All passers-by must allow themselves to be inspected! Where are you from? Where are you going? Answer me honestly!” You wonder, how many times he had said this. You can tell the truth, that you’re not from here, telling everything how you have been chosen by some God…Gods to travel across Teyvat. You can also just say that you’re a traveler and you wanted to see the beauty of Watatsumi Island. You can lie about being friend of Traveler and Paimon. You can also don’t say anything and just ignore him.

I just realized I can't edit the posts with polls oops… well I should have guessed I won't be able to do that orz If you want to see the previous ones or next one just check Masterlist!

[beatrice-otter]

Fic: Revenge of the Zillo Beast

Title: Revenge of the Zillo Beast Fandom: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy Characters: Mace Windu & Anakin Skywalker Written For: ExtraPenguin in FicInABox 2022 Length: Gen Rating: 4140 words Summary: Mace and Anakin have killed the Zillo Beast every way they can think of in different time loops. Maybe killing the Beast won't solve the problem? At AO3. On Dreamwidth. On Pillowfort.

Mace stared down at the Zillo Beast's corpse, wishing for the thousandth time that the time loop started earlier. They'd never been able to capture the beast alive, and how quickly or slowly they killed it did not matter. Nor did it matter which direction they tried to lead the beast off. If the loop started earlier, they would have had a chance to alter the strategic decisions regarding the Beast, which might actually have made a difference.

Anakin Skywalker walked up beside him, looked at the beast, and shook his head. "Lunch?"

"We've already tried all our favorite restaurants," Mace said. "Do we want to repeat one, or ask the directory for a random restaurant in this district?"

Anakin shrugged. "Your choice. But next time, we're going to Dex's."

Mace nodded. Diner food wasn't his favorite, but he didn't dislike it; and while they had long ago exhausted the Besalisk's information on their problem, he was a hospitable being, and friend of Anakin's. "Let's be adventurous," Mace said. "It's not like either of us have much time to sample good restaurants ordinarily."

***

They ended up in a little hole-in-the-wall dumpling shop down at the very bottom of the 'respectable, but poor' levels, barely one level up from the undercity. Mace didn't think the health certificate for the kitchen was valid, but the food was excellent.

"You know, this is better Naboo-style kluski than Chancellor Palpatine's chef makes," Anakin said, chowing down enthusiastically.

"I believe it," Mace said, savoring his Haruuni fritter. "I'll have to remember this place, once the loop stops."

"If it ever does," Anakin said darkly.

That was depressingly likely. "Speaking of which, do you have any suggestions for the next loop? I think we've done everything possible we can do to or about the Zillo Beast."

Anakin shrugged. "The only thing I can think of is that whatever the loop is about, it's not the Beast. The Beast is a distraction."

"You're probably right," Mace said. "The question is, how do we figure out what the actual cause of the time loop is? We've already had Jocasta Nu and the Senate archivists working on that question for several different loops, and none of them came up with anything—not even any leads we might use for further research on subsequent loops." Indeed, several loops—ten, Mace thought, though they were beginning to blend together—had been devoted to killing the Beast as quickly as possible to leave more time to research with the archivists before everything reset.

Anakin hmmed agreement through a mouthful of food, and they ate in a companionable silence. The first dozen loops, they had had a lot more friction, Anakin's need for action driving him even when (as now) there was nothing left to be done but wait for the next loop. The younger Jedi hadn't exactly learned patience, but he had learned to pace himself, to relax at the end of the loop so that they might both be better ready for the intensity of the loop's beginning. "We've tried logic and research, and they haven't worked," Anakin said. "Maybe we need to look to the Force?"

"Spend a loop meditating, you mean?" Mace said. "Ignore the beast?"

"But the Chancellor would die!" Anakin protested.

"Not permanently," Mace pointed out. He leaned back, trying to find a comfortable position on the worn and patched vinyl bench cushion.

"Yeah, but it still feels … wrong," Anakin said. "How would you feel if I suggested letting one of your friends die in a loop?"

"I wouldn't like it," Mace said. "But it's temporary, and at this point I'm ready to try anything that isn't obviously Dark."

Anakin sighed. "Me, too."

They lapsed back into silence.

"I think we've pretty conclusively proved that there's not much point asking for help from people outside the loop," Mace said.

"If anybody does have knowledge we need, they can't get it to us before the loop resets," Anakin said.

Besides asking the archivists at both the Temple and the Senate, they'd also spent a couple of loops calling for anyone else stuck in the loop with them. First, Mace had used Temple channels to ask all Jedi to report any strange phenomena, and then Anakin had used his war hero status to get on the Holonet and ask all Republic citizens who might have information to contact them. There had been a lot of crank calls, but nothing of any actual use.

"So what do we do if the thing causing the loops isn't on Coruscant at all?" Anakin asked.

Mace shrugged. "Hope that we can figure it out, and that there's a Jedi within eight hours' travel time of it. I suppose it's possible that this is the result of some Sith magic that Dooku was trying, but … I doubt it. If that were the case, why would you and I be the ones who remember the loop? I can't imagine a Sith would want two Jedi to be in the loop with a chance of figuring things out and fixing them."

"Unless it's a plot to make us absolutely crazy by the time they end the loop," Anakin said grimly.

"In which case, it's even more important for us to take care of ourselves so that no matter when the loop ends, we're fit to act," Mace said. "But still, if that were the goal, why only two Jedi? Why not the whole Council?"

"Maybe it's just easier to get the two of us," Anakin said. "I'm the Chosen One and you see shatterpoints—we're both a bit unique in our connection to the Force."

"Lots of Jedi are a bit unique in their connection to the Force," Mace pointed out, "but I take your point."

"So, meditation," Anakin said. "It's not really my thing. Why don't we try you meditating on the loop, and me killing the Zillo Beast and saving the Chancellor?"

"I have a feeling that you're right, and that we're both in the loop because of something that we share," Mace said. "In which case, a joint meditation would be more useful."

"I don't like it," Anakin said. He scraped the spoon along the side of the bowl to get the last of the sauce and licked it. "But I can't say you're wrong. If we want to be able to meditate, we'll need to be somewhere people won't think to look for us when the Beast gets loose."

"We've had archivists look for unusual things before," Mace said thoughtfully, "but never while one or both of us was there to meditate on what they found. Perhaps we should meditate in a quiet room in the archives and have your droid sort through the newsfeeds looking for anything worth our attention."

"Sounds like a plan," Anakin said. He checked his chrono. "We've got another couple of hours before the loop resets. Do you want to meditate now, or wait?"

Mace shrugged. "All the shatterpoints disappear after the Beast dies, I don't think there's much point meditating now."

"Fair enough," Anakin said. "You got to choose dinner, so I should get to choose our evening's entertainment. There's swoop racing ten levels down from here, and two miles to the east."

Mace considered this as he dug out credits to cover their meal. Illegal swoop racing wasn't how he'd prefer to spend the evening, but it was a change. Really, he missed Depa and his other friends, and would give a great deal to be able to spend the evening relaxing with them, but he and Anakin had both learned early on that it was eerie to spend time with those who did not remember all they had been through and would forget again when the loop reset. "Fastest way to get that far down is to jump."

Anakin grinned. "I like the way you think."

…

…

When the loop reset, it took very little time to sneak through the Temple to the Archives, and Anakin and his droid met him in a back room. The hardest part was evading Master Nu; the Temple was empty enough, these days, that Mace barely had to try to avoid the notice of other Jedi along the way.

"What did you bring?" Anakin asked, gesturing to his bag.

"Pillows," Mace said, pulling out two overstuffed cushions from his couch. "I don't meditate well sitting in chairs, and I'd prefer not to spend the next several hours sitting on the bare floor."

"Good thinking," Anakin said, though he was young enough it probably didn't matter much to him one way or the other. He turned to his astromech and explained what they wanted it to do while Mace arranged a meditation space on the floor. He'd also brought candles and a variety of meditation aids, and some water bottles.

Once the droid was plugged into the terminal, Anakin joined Mace on the cushions and together they started a joint meditation. As with all meditation these days, the Force was not welcoming; there were shadows all around them filled with danger, and Mace didn't blame Anakin for not liking meditation; things had been growing steadily murkier and harder for years, and by the time the younger man had joined the Jedi a decade and a half ago, it had already been a far cry from the tranquil, welcoming embrace it had been in Mace's youth.

Mace tended to lose track of time during meditation, so he had no idea how long they had been at it when the Force burst out around them, shatterpoints detonating by the thousands. Mace came back to himself, lying on the floor, with an astromech bending over him and beeping in dismay. He blinked up at the ceiling, trying to gather his wits.

To the side of him Anakin was sitting hunched over, head in his hands, muttering softly in a language that sounded vaguely similar to Huttese.

"Force be with us, what was that?" Mace asked.

"I don't know," Anakin said. "But it was big, whatever it was."

"It's something new, that hasn't happened in any previous loop," Mace said, wincing at himself for stating the obvious.

"Have you noticed the Force?" Anakin asked. "It feels … weird. Good, but weird."

Mace reached out, and smiled. "It feels like it did when I was a child in the creche, before the darkness started closing in so tightly."

"Oh," Anakin said. He looked over, and noticed that Mace was on the floor. "Are you okay?"

"I am … better than I've been in a long time," Mace said, laughing at how bright and clear the Force was.

"O … kay," Anakin said dubiously, staring at him.

"But we must find out what happened," Mace said. "It is possible that whatever it was did not end the loop, in which case we must learn what it was so that we may repeat it when the loop ends."

"Chancellor Palpatine!" Anakin gasped. "If it did break the loop, and the beast kills him!"

Mace dug out his commlink and turned it on. There were, as he expected, many missed calls.

Anakin was quicker off the mark. "Master Obi-Wan, what is it?"

"Anakin, where the hell have you been? The Zillo Beast got loose and has been rampaging across Coruscant!" Obi-Wan said.

"Sorry, no time to explain, where are you?" Anakin said.

"The Senate plaza, but I'm afraid you're too late."

"What happened?" Mace said into Anakin's commlink.

"Master Windu? I'm not … actually quite sure," Obi-Wan said. "The Zillo Beast went directly for Chancellor Palpatine, and we could neither stop it nor lure it away nor get the Chancellor to safety. It—it ate him, and as it bit down, there was … something like an explosion."

Anakin sagged, and almost dropped the commlink. Mace gently took it from him, placing a hand on his shoulder for comfort.

"Everyone on the plaza was knocked down. The beast is … the beast is in several parts. And something has happened to the Force."

"We've noticed that," Mace said. "We'll be there as soon as we can. See if you can find the Chancellor's body."

"There's … the explosion seems to have been centered around the Zillo Beast's head," Obi-Wan said. "There may not be much left."

Anakin made a tortured sound, and Mace squeezed his shoulder. "Do what you can."

When Obi-Wan had signed off, Mace squeezed Anakin's shoulder again. "I'm sorry, Anakin."

"He—the loop might not be broken," Anakin said wetly. "It might be temporary. He might be back at the beginning of the next loop."

"Perhaps," Mace said. With each passing moment he was more sure that the loop had been broken, but he would not take Anakin's hope away from him until he had to. And he might be mistaken. Little though Mace had liked the Chancellor, the man had been a good friend and mentor to Anakin, and Mace honored that. "You don't have to come with me to see, if you don't want to. You could stay here, and rest."

"No," Anakin said. He looked up, and there were tears on his face. "I want to come. I want to see."

…

…

Anakin insisted on flying, which Mace was dubious about, but he had pulled himself together enough to function by the time they reached the hangar bay, and once they were in the air, he felt calmer in the Force.

"Nothing ever exploded before," Anakin said. "We've killed the Zillo Beast a hundred different ways, almost, and it always just died like any animal would. What caused the explosion?"

"Maybe the Chancellor had something on him that exploded," Mace said.

"He was a politician," Anakin said. "And not one like Padmé or Bail Organa—he never went into the field, and he always had guards. He wasn't trained in combat. He didn't wear weapons."

"If he were armed, and I doubt he was, it would have been a holdout blaster," Mace agreed. "Blasters don't explode like that unless you purposely bugger the cartridge. And even then, it wouldn't have been a big enough explosion to leave the Zillo in pieces."

"Did it eat something else, along the way?" Anakin wondered. "Something that it never did before?"

"Never in all the times we've fought it?" Mace said. "Possible, but unlikely. Besides, there's the fact that the explosion was in the Force itself, and left the Force around Coruscant clearer and brighter than it has been in longer than you've been alive. Could the Chancellor somehow have acquired a Sith artifact of some sort?"

"He would have told me, turned it over to the Jedi," Anakin said. "He knows—knew—how dangerous the Sith were."

"Not if he didn't know what it was," Mace said. "Or if his memory had been tampered with. He was a strong-willed man, but the Sith have ways of overriding that."

Anakin was quiet for a bit. "Dooku has always said that the Senate is under the sway of his Sith master," he said as they approached the Senate plaza. "Obi-Wan and I thought he was lying, but … if the Sith Master is on Coruscant, and if he had access to the Chancellor, that would explain a lot."

That was a frightening thought, but there was no time to discuss it further, for they were touching down.

…

…

"Anakin, I'm so sorry," Obi-Wan said as they climbed out of the speeder. They'd set down on the opposite side of the plaza from where the remains were, to avoid disturbing them. He embraced his former padawan.

Mace gave them a moment, studying the remains of the Beast from across the plaza. The explosion pattern did not match any of the common bombs or explosives he had become familiar with over the course of the war.

When Obi-Wan stepped up beside him, Mace pointed to the remains. "Does that remind you of the pattern left when a young Initiate has a tantrum and throws everything away from them with the Force?"

"Now that you mention it, yes," Obi-Wan said. "Could he have been an untrained Force-sensitive, reacting instinctively to fatal danger?" They began walking across the plaza toward it.

"But the Chancellor wasn't Force-sensitive," Anakin said. "I don't see how an artifact—even a Sith artifact—could have done that. Unless there was a Sith present? Did a Sith throw him into the maw of the beast, somehow?"

"I sensed no active Force-user besides myself," Obi-Wan said. "As far as we can tell, no explosives were used. But you may be right about the presence of a Sith or Sith artifact. Come see for yourself."

By the time they were within ten feet of the Beast, all three were grimacing. "I see what you mean," Anakin said. "That's foul. How could the Dark Side saturate this place so suddenly?"

"It's like all the darkness that has shrouded the galaxy's core for decades was concentrated into this one place," Mace said. He had a very bad feeling about the Chancellor. "We need to search his office, residence, and every other significant location we can find."

"To see if we can find evidence of the Sith Lord?" Anakin asked.

"Yes," Mace said.

…

…

Obi-Wan and Senator Amidala had remained at the plaza to deal with the Senate. Vice Chancellor Amedda would be sworn in as Interim Chancellor until the Senate could vote on a new Chancellor … and given the unexpectedness of the situation, the war, and everything else, it would be a contentious election.

But politics were not Mace's concern, right now. He and Anakin and the Coruscant Guard went to the Chancellor's office to search it.

"We've all been here many times before," Mace said as they strode through the corridors of the Senate building. "But don't let that make you complacent. The Sith are masters at remaining hidden. Anakin, you and I should evaluate every object with the Force; troopers, if you have any insights, please share them immediately."

"Yes, Sir," Commander Fox said briskly.

"There may not be anything here," Mace continued. "Any artifacts may be in his residence, or hidden elsewhere. Or, of course, my suspicions may be entirely wrong. But I intend to be very thorough, to be sure that we have found everything there is to be found."

"Right," Anakin said. "We don't want the Sith to slip through our fingers."

But, as it turned out, it was obvious they were not mistaken. When the doors of the office opened, Anakin turned green and clapped a hand to his mouth. Mace winced. The troopers didn't seem to react, but then, they were not Force-sensitive and their helmets covered their faces.

"How did we miss this?" Anakin said.

"I don't think it's actually that much worse than the rest of Coruscant was, before that explosion," Mace said. The intensity of it was already passing off, and it felt … almost normal and unremarkable. Familiar. It was the immediate contrast between it and the new clarity of the Force that had made it so noticeable.

"What did it do to him, to have this around him all the time?" Anakin wondered. "It can't have been good."

"If this Force-atmosphere you're talking about used to cover the whole planet, the Jedi would have been affected, too," Fox pointed out. "And everyone else on the planet."

"True," Anakin said. "And we weren't affected by it."

"Weren't we?" Mace said dryly. He shook his head. That could be pondered later. The door was flanked with large decorative vases in the heavy, dramatic, dark style Palpatine had always favored. He turned to one, placed a hand on it, and closed his eyes, reaching out with the Force.

…

…

cold dark

…

pinpricks

pain

…

no? he was

not

he was he was. He was. He was! He was Mace Windu, Jedi Master—

Mace wrenched himself out of the thing's grasp, and found himself on the floor.

"Are you alright?"

Anakin was crouched beside him. Fox and his men had their blasters out, covering all angles; Fox and two others had them pointed directly at the vases.

It took Mace a few minutes to pull himself together enough to realize why the Force was telling him that was a bad idea.

"Lower your weapons," Mace said, forcing words out through a brain that didn't want to cooperate. "Sith artifacts are often boobytrapped. Shooting at it might make it more dangerous." He lay back and closed his eyes, wishing the lights would stop strobing.

"I'm calling for the healers," Anakin said.

Mace nodded. He could feel Anakin lay a hand on him, the pressure grounding him in his body. He started clenching and releasing his muscles so that he could feel his body and connect with it. If they'd been on a time-sensitive mission, he could have forced himself onto his feet and gone on, trusting the Force to sustain him. But the Sith was dead and the Force was humming contentedly and laying here waiting for the healers sounded … very good.

"Turn down the lights," Anakin said, "I think they're hurting him."

"Thanks," Mace said, as the light level lowered. Even with his eyes closed, it made a difference.

Anakin called the Temple for help.

"Nu," Mace said when he was done talking with the healers.

"You want me to call Madame Nu?" Anakin said. "Is it something she can research?"

"Maybe," Mace said. "I think it's a Spirit Urn."

"A Sith Spirit Urn?" Anakin said, voice rising. "Like out of the crecheling tales?"

"Think so," Mace said. "Could be wrong. But I'd like to know if there are any long-term effects I should be worrying about." He felt much better even after this short a time, but it was better to be safe than sorry and he would rather get the all-clear from the healers before doing anything else.

Anakin made a second comm call.

"What's a Sith Spirit Urn?" Fox asked, when he was done.

"A Sith device that sucks out peoples' souls," Anakin said. "Then tortures them for … as long as the Sith who owns it wants to torture them. In case torturing someone to death isn't enough, I guess. It starts out by trapping you in cold and despair so you feel like nothing and don't have the will to resist as it slowly detaches your spirit from your body and anchors it to the urn, leaving your body as a vegetative husk."

"Are you sure we shouldn't just blast it into pieces?" Fox said.

"It can't hurt anyone as long as they don't probe it with the Force or touch it with their bare skin," Mace said. He cracked his eyes open, and found the light was not distressing, so he opened them all the way. He was steadily feeling better, but he was going to have to spend weeks rebuilding his shields.

"Or as long as the Sith Master doesn't show up and start feeding people to it," Anakin said. "Aren't they supposed to be able to do that from, like, half a planet away?"

"I think he's dead," Mace said.

Anakin paused, and looked down. "You think Palpatine was the Sith Master," he said accusingly. It was a better reaction than Mace had hoped for. "But he loved archaeology and old artifacts! It could just be something someone dug up and that he thought looked nice!"

"Dug up where, Malachor?" Mace asked. "Korriban? That's not the kind of thing the Sith would have left just laying around. You'd have to excavate a Sith stronghold to find it, there would be ancient weapons and booby traps and hazards far beyond the normal archaeological issues. Even if, somehow, you managed to do it and not understand what you were dealing with … the urn itself is fatal to anyone who isn't a Sith who touches it with their bare skin. Do you think that out of everybody from the archaeologists to the antiquities dealers to the people handling the shipping to all the people in and out of this office every day, not one of them ever happened to brush up against it? Not even once?"

"But he was always so good to me," Anakin said, helplessly.

They would have to spend long sessions with Anakin, going over everything Palpatine had said and done in their private meetings, but Mace couldn't deal with that now. "The loop can't have been something he did."

"No," Anakin said.

"Thank the Force," Mace said. "We would never have caught him, never suspected him. Not really."

"I just can't believe—" Anakin said. He was quiet for a while. "That's not true. I don't want to believe. But … you're right. There's no other explanation for the Sith Spirit Urns. Or for the way the Force cleared when he died."

"We're saved, now," Mace said. "Thank the Force."

"And thank the Zillo Beast," Anakin said.

"That too," Mace said.

[lesbianlanarcher]

just think about it, okay ––– 

sterling wakes up from his coma, three years of his life gone, he'll never get that back, so he tries not to dwell on it. nor does he wish to dissect his dreams because thinking back to those lives he made up is dangerously close to introspection which he is adamantly against. so, he shifts focus, tries to acclimate himself to whatever his life is now. being alone sucks, sleeping with random women sucks less but that doesn't last, drinking makes him feel worse but he's not ever giving that up for anything. doing everything he used to before is pointless and, plainly, nauseating. he needs people, he’s realised... he needs to feel grounded, needs to hear laughter, needs to be in the centre of a crowded room, needs to feel real again or just feel something again. but he doesn't have many people he can call on to help him out. a stripper isn't gonna solve his problems, bartenders have heard it all before, no one wants to level with him; new york does not care. who's left? his friends, distant colleagues, these people he was forced into a working relationship with all those years ago, the people who have known him the longest, whatever he fuck they are too – they aren't there either.

who does sterling have to help him out when he needs it most? who does his mind go to purely out of instinct? who does he crave when he knows he shouldn’t? who can make him feel both shittier and lift his spirits at the same time? who is unlike anyone else? who will he always want?

~

“Lana.”

He shouldn’t be doing this.

“I bet you’re busy with that... that... creature.”

But he wants to.

“That bald fuck.”

And he always gets his way.

“Stupid prick.”

He takes a swig of... something. Some random bottle that was hidden right at the back of the drybar because he’s already drowned himself in everything else. 

“Or you’re still ignoring my calls.”

It’s been hard adjusting to a life without Woodhouse. Well, it’s been hard adjusting in general. But Woodhouse not being there anymore is the perfectly slick cherry atop the shitheap that is his turd cake of a life. So, it feels apt. 

“Which is a shitty thing to do. You know, I just got out of a three-year coma? A coma? You know what one of those are?”

Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he knows he deserves everything he gets. He’s stacked up a lot of bad karma, it was bound to catch up to him at some point. He just didn’t expect it to feel so... crushing. And he definitely didn’t think his punishment would be this lonesome either.

“Yeah, you know. You just don’t care.”

He thought everyone would be falling through his apartment door to spend time with him, ask him how it felt to be in a coma, show some form of interest in his return. 

“And, I mean, why should you?”

It never came. 

“It’s not like, hah, it’s not like we have a child together or anything.”

And from her? Nothing. Not a word. He spewed his guts, heart, lungs, intestines, everything... confessed to her at that gala and... nothing.

“Oh, wait, my mistake. We don’t.”

He tried - fuck - he tried to tell her everything he could. Everything he should have told her the very second he knew she was the only thing in his life that held any sort of value. Everything he was capable of saying without choking on the words, without gagging and wanting to throw up, he said it. 

“Because she doesn’t even know me. AJ doesn’t know her father.”

But it wasn’t enough.

“Because you replaced me.”

It might not ever be enough.

“Everyone replaced me. Me.”

His words won’t ever be good enough for her. 

“Like I never fucking existed in the first place.”

Words are all he has now, as empty as they may seem. Saying it wasn’t easy. Confronting that part of himself, the part that craves and needs and wants her is akin to torture. And Sterling knows torture well. What he doesn’t know is how he can prove that any more; how he can prove himself to her. He’s wronged her in the past, sure, but that doesn’t take away from the fact he loves her. Can’t she see that? That he fucking adores her. That he would do anything for her, that he would die in less than a heartbeat for her, he would give everything up for her to kiss him again.

“Maybe that’s what you all wanted, though? Maybe me being in a coma was the best thing that ever happened to everyone? Maybe...”

And she’s never said it back to him, not once. Perhaps in her actions, like he’s told her again and again just what she means to him, but she has never told him directly. Never said the words. No one has. Not in a manner that means anything substantial, anyway. 

“Maybe you should have just pulled the plug.”

Perhaps no one is capable of showing him that affection he so sorely needs. Katya could have... He thought she might have been the only one to rival Lana, the only other woman who could keep him distracted and occupied, but even that was tainted and turned against him. Like most things. Ruined.

“What was the point of keeping me alive?”

So, he figures he’s not meant for it. To be loved. Not meant to be shown that side of life that comes so, so fucking easy for everyone else.

“If I was gonna come back to this? What was the point, Lana?”

He has wealth in an over-abundance, any woman - or man - he wants he could probably get, and endless supply of liquor. He has it all. Doesn’t he?

“You don’t have to give me any real answers,” He laughs, abruptly and slightly manically, “You probably won’t even listen to this,” then, takes another swig of whatever bottle is dangling limply from his hand, “Good, don’t. Save us both the embarrassment. Right? Just ignore it. Like everything else. Ignore me.”

He doesn’t bother to disconnect the voice message, just tightens his hand around the phone until he can feel the muscles in his arm scream out in pain. Fucking nerve damage. Incensed even more, he hurls the device across the room where it smashes against the wall and falls to the floor, partially shattered. 

Another apt metaphor, he thinks, the bottle back to his lips, feverishly sucking from it like he’ll get what he needs when he reaches the bottom and drains it. 

The truth is, he never will.

But that doesn’t stop him from trying.

[itsstrawberrymochi]

Hi, I love your content so I wanted to request something! Could you do headcanons with the hashira’s x gender neutral reader(- muchiro ofc) where they find out that the reader self-harms? If this makes you uncomfortable at all please delete it!

Kny pillars reacting to their s/o who self-harms

Awww thank you anonymous that means a lot to me hope you enjoy this also thx for reading my request rules when you said minus Muichiro ^^

Characters: all pillars expect Muichiro

Warnings: Mentions of self-harm and suicide

Note: if you or anyone you know is doing this activity please seek help with people you trust , it may seem that self harm is the best distraction but it’s really not, it’s only a temporary relief and you don’t deserve to always go through that pain ❤️

Giyuu

🌊- Now it took him a while to notice this

🌊- Don’t get him wrong, Giyuu loves you and all but he just assumed the injuries were from a demon after all that’s what you told him you had to no reason to lie right?

🌊- When he found out the truth he got extremely sad, he also got mad at himself for taking so long to notice

🌊- When he finds out he wouldn’t dare shout at you or make a scene out of it, instead he’ll calmly approach you and ask what’s the matter

🌊-If you don’t tell him right away he won’t pressure you to do so instead he’ll wait until you’re ready to talk

🌊- He’ll just sit next to you calmly in silence for hours and hours until you’re finally ready tell him

🌊- When you tell him the reason he would start to try and find a solution for the problem so you can feel better

🌊- He would also pull you in a soft hug and just let you cry on him while listening to you tell him what’s wrong

🌊- Giyuu would alway try his absolute best to make you feel better and he’s very serious about the cutting/harming and does everything in his power to try and make you stop

🌊- He’s extremely afraid that one day you’ll go beyond self-harming and he doesn’t want to lose you

Rengoku

🔥- A literal angel that was sent from heaven

🔥- Rengoku would immediately notice that you self-harm, he is extremely observant when it comes to you so he’d be quick to realize

🔥- Like Giyuu he wouldn’t pressure you to tell him what’s the matter but he’ll wait until you’re ready to say

🔥- Rengoku would make sure you know that it’s not you vs the problem but rather you and him vs the problem

🔥- He’ll make sure you know he’s there for you and whatever problem there is you don’t have to go through it alone

🔥-He also isn’t the type to give you words such as “ it’s ok this problem will pass” or “you’ll get over ”, but rather say “ Don’t worry my little flame we will find a solution to the problem no matter what”

🔥- If you’re feeling helpless or upset and feel like self-harming again he’ll drop everything he’s doing to talk to you and try and calm you down

🔥- Rengoku would allow you to talk to him whenever. He would never tell you to go away or say he’s too busy. He’d also let you talk to him for hours it doesn’t matter to him just as long as you feel better

🔥- There are often occasions where you would be laying on his lap and he’ll gently rub your back as you cry and rant to him

Shinobu

🦋- She’ll notice right away, she’s a medic so she can tell the difference between real injuries and self- inflicted ones

🦋- She would become heartbroken to know you were so sad you felt the only way to feel better was pain

🦋- She would make all the butterfly girls leave and go to another room so she can talk to you in private when she found out

🦋- Even though some scars are already healed she would kiss every single one of them

🦋- She does it because she wants to ‘kiss it better’

🦋- She would place bandages and medicine all over the new cuts so they can heal properly

🦋- She is very patient with you, she understands that you won’t stop your self-harm just like that so she’ll take her time talking to you and helping you get over it

🦋- She would alway check up on you and whenever she does she always has some tea or your favorite food ready to talk and listen to you

🦋- She always encourages you to tell her you’re true feelings and never makes you feel emotional or dramatic for it

🦋- If she knows she’s going on a really long mission and won’t see you for while she’ll ask Kanao or one of the butterfly girls to check up on you but if you don’t want them to know about it she would keep it private and she’ll just constantly send you letters instead

Mitsuri

💖- When she found out she talked to you as soon as she could

💖- She found out during a pillar meeting when your sleeve accidentally lifted up showing all the unnatural scars

💖- She had waited after the pillar meeting, when you two were in private to talk about it. She knew you clearly didn’t want anyone to know so she was sure no one was around

💖- When she asked you about it she couldn’t help but break down crying, Mitsuri would blame her self for your self-harming and feel like she did something wrong to you but you’ll explain to her that it wasn’t her fault but she’ll still cry because you were hurting all this time and she didn’t know.

💖- Her number one method of helping you heal is showing you lots and lots of love and care and showing you she is there for you

💖- So that basically means more sweets, more tea parties, hugs and kisses,more l love you, her complementing you all the time etc

💖- She had also bought you a bunny, so if she ever went on long missions you’ll always have “ someone” to talk to.

Sanemi

☁️- At first he would be kind of angry. Angry at himself for not noticing and angry at you for not telling him

☁️- Genya was the one who had told him , Genya being your worried younger brother in law couldn’t stand by and watch you do this to yourself

☁️- Sanemi’s first thought was to yell at you for doing it but then he thought you’d probably be afraid to talk to him about it if he did

☁️- He’ll burst in your room and yell “Y/N I KNOW YOU INTENTIONALLY HURT YOUR SELF”

☁️- You expecting him to yell about it prepared for more but when he reached you he just shoved your face into his chest and pulled you in for a soft hug

☁️- He’ll then say he was sorry you had to go through all this pain alone and sorry that he wasn’t there for you

☁️- He’ll allow you to cry on his shoulder for as long as you’d like

☁️- He wouldn’t care that you’re messing up his slayer uniform nor how long you’re crying for

☁️- While you’re crying he’ll reassure he is now and will forever be there for you and he’ll also reassure you and you can tell him anything

☁️- This wasn’t the only time he allowed you to cry on his shoulder,after the one time you cried he wouldn’t easily dismiss the matter but instead constantly bring it up to make sure you’re getting better

Obanai

🐍- He’s a very observation person especially when it comes to you so he’ll notice your self-harming rather quickly

🐍- He was very patient with you, so the first time he asked and you didn’t tell him he waited until you were ready, like Giyuu he didn’t force you to talk about it.

🐍- When you two did talk about it he never judged you or made you feel bad for doing it, he never called your self harming ‘ attention seeking’ or called you dramatic for doing it

🐍- instead he’ll empathize with you and try to understand why you’re doing it

🐍-Obanai is definitely not one to show physical affection, he rather shows he loves you through words of affirmation BUT If you ever need him to hold you or hug you he’d be more than glad to do it

🐍- He’ll alway hold on onto you and assure you he’ll try and help you solve the problem

🐍- You’ll also have Kaburamaru to be your support snake he’ll alway wraps hisself around you or rub his head on your check to try and make you feel better

🐍- Obanai always try his best to make you feel better and he will near you every second of the day he’s right next to you to because he wants to be a constant reminder that you’re not alone

Uzui

🔊- It was own of the wives that told him about it

🔊- Uzui would immediately blame himself he would think you were probably upset that he was giving one of his wives e attention than you

🔊- He’ll then immediately go to you and apologies for it but then you’ll explain to him that’s not the reason. He’ll then feel relieved but immediately worry knowing there’s something making his love sad

🔊- He is the type to not assume what would make you feel better but would ask you how he could help. He’d ask if you want to talk about it with him, if you wanna talk to someone else maybe one of the wives, if you wanna be left alone, if you want a support animal ( yes willing to get you a cat/dog/lizard etc to make you feel better 😌)

🔊- He would kindly ask for you to give him the weapons you use for self-harm, he refuses to do it by force because that’ll make matters worst, if you don’t give it to him the time he’ll constantly ask for always in a soft and calm voice

🔊- If you’re a slayer he’ll even go as far and take away your sword he’d only give it back if he’s sure someone else is going on a mission with you and they can watch you or if he’s going

🔊- He would also get all of his wives to separately talk to you and try to make you feel better

🔊- Uzui allows you to cry on his shoulder if you ever need it and he’ll gently pat your head or rub your back

Gyomei

🪨-He would cry as soon as he found out

🪨-Like Shinobu he would be extremely heartbroken and his heat would weep for you

🪨- He absolutely hates the fact that you hurt yourself and would always cry thinking about it or if he hears you did it again

🪨- If the reason you are cutting yourself is because you don’t feel like you are good enough he would remind you of all your good qualities and there are lot

🪨- He’ll also wrap his arms around you and cuddle you as you cry because he knows how much you love it

🪨- Gyomei, if you allow it likes to gently rub all your self-injury scars because he believes you deserve comfort for going through all that pain

🪨-He wound often call them battle scars he does it because he believes that you did in fact went through a battle with many problems and you won

🪨- He is very gentle and patient when it comes to your self-harming , when he speaks to you about it and gives you advice it’s always in a soft and calming voice and whenever you rant or cry about how you feel he’ll patiently wait there for hours and let you speak, he’ll only speak when he knows that you are done, he wouldn’t dare interrupt you

This was my first time writing Uzui and Gyomei hope I did good, also this was my longest ever request so I wouldn’t be surprised if it has grammar errors sorry for that 😭

[curiositymemes]

1776 SENTENCE STARTERS : PART ONE.

taken from the 1972 film adaptation of the 1969 broadway musical. feel free to change wording and pronouns and provide context as necessary. do not add to this list.    

“there you are.”

“didn’t you hear me call you?”

“what do you keep coming up here for?”

“i can just imagine.”

“oh, good god.”

“what in the hell are you waiting for?!”

“sit down, ___.”

“consider yourselves fortunate that you have ____ to abuse, for no sane man/woman/person would tolerate it!”

“will someone shut that man/woman/person up?” / “never!”

“a cataclysmic earthquake, i’d accept with some despair.”

“good god, sir/madam/per, was that fair?”

“nothing’s ever solved.” 

“___, ___, is that you carrying on, ___?”

“oh ___, ___, i have such a desire to knock heads together.” 

“i’m no further along than i was when i first came here.” 

“i know, my dearest, i know.”

“but that’s because you make everything so complicated.”

“and hurry home to me.”

“what else is new?”

“now, have you done as i asked?” / “no, ___, i have not.” / “well, why have you not?!”

“i’m afraid we have a more urgent problem.” 

“don’t smirk at me, you egotist, pay heed to what i say.”

“i am, as i ever was, yours.”

“where in hell are you?!”

“___, i see you hiding behind that tree, it won’t do you any good!”

“i have been looking everywhere for you, where in god’s name have you been?!”

“it stinks.” / “as ever, the soul of tact.”

“where were you last night when i needed you?” 

“i have more to do than stand here listening to you quote yourself.” 

“reconciliation, my ass.”

“and if ____ can’t put up with you, nobody can.” 

“you’re getting at something.” / “how can you tell?”

“oh, ____, that’s brilliant. wasn’t that brilliant, ____?” 

“i’ll leave tonight. why, hell, i’ll leave right now, if ya like!”

“what makes you so sure you can do it?”

“forward, ho!”

“that was the most revolting display i have ever witnessed.”

“you and your infernal obsession for deviousness.”

“if you’ll be wanting anything at all…” 

“there won’t be too long to wait.”

“i’m surprised you didn’t know that.”

“___ here is just a lad/lass/kid.”

“you’re too late, ___. once i get them, they’re got.” 

“oh, ___, forgive me, but how can anyone see you if you insist on standing in ___’s shadow?”

“what are you staring at? haven’t you ever seen a great man/woman/person before?” 

“do you have the honor to be dr/mr/mrs/mx ___?” 

“oh, ___, i only wish ___ felt like my big toe all over.” 

“that strutting popinjay was so damn sure of his/her/themself.”

“sweet jesus!”

“you’ve abused the privilege.”

“my god, it’s hot.”

“we are not in touch at the present time.”

“may we hear about the weather?” 

“sadly, i see no way of stopping them at the present time.”

“where’s the fire, can anybody tell?”

“___, i’m back! i’m back, ___!”  / “___, lad/lass/kid, welcome back.”

“is it done?”

“you would, you lousy wart.”

“___ abstains courteously.”

“the people are against it, and i’m for it.” 

“i’m comin’, i’m comin’! hold your damn horses.” / “we’re waiting on you, ___.” / “well, it won’t kill you.” 

“so it’s up to me, huh?”

“well, i’ll tell you.”

“in all my years, i’ve never seen, heard, nor smelled an issue that was so dangerous it couldn’t be talked about.”

“hell yes! i’m for debating anything.” 

“well, now, you’ve got your way at last, ___.”

“i confess i’m almost relieved.” 

“yes, that’s what he/she/they want. nothing less will satisfy him/her/them.” 

“how is a man/woman/person to sleep?”

“how is a man/woman/person to stay awake?”

“why can’t you acknowledge what already exists?!”

“sit down, you scurvy dog, or i’ll knock you down!”

“i only got two hands!”

“you refuse to understand us.”

“for once in your life, ___, take a chance.”

“i say the time is now. it may never come again.”

“we will more than compensate in spirit.”

“you…. you fribble!” 

“are you calling me a coward?” 

“stop it, stop it!” 

“the enemy’s out there.”

“but he/she/they should go home.”

“a man/woman/person should die in his/her/their own bed.”

“i’m here, ___.” 

“___, do something. think.” / “i’m thinking, but nothing’s coming.”

“excuse me. is this ___?”

“yes, i can see that it must be.”

“we’ve been looking for you everywhere, you see.”

“oh, how splendid. that means we’re not too late!” 

“i regret that i must be the bearer of unhappy tidings.”

“why the long face?” 

“tell me. why did they arrest the little bastard?”

“well, haven’t i made that clear?” / “no.” / “well, i suppose i haven’t.”

“what are you doing?!”

“you’ve sunk us!”

“i can see no other way.”

“oh, for heaven’s sake, let me get through it once.”

“ditto, ditto, et cetera, et cetera.” 

“what in hell goes on in ____?!” 

“they speak very fast and very loud and nobody listens to anybody else with the result that nothing ever gets done.”

“any objections?” / “i have objections. i have lots of objections!” 

“i don’t know, he/she/they had a funny look on his/her/their face.” / “he/she/they always does.”

“i’m obnoxious and disliked, you know that.”

“hell no!” 

“i don’t know a participle from a predicate.” 

“he’s/she’s/they’re obnoxious and disliked, did you know that?” / “i hadn’t heard.”

“leave me alone!” 

“magnificent.”

“life is more than sexual combustibility!” 

“who will make me, ___?” / “i.” / “you?” / “yes.” / “how?” / “by physical force, if necessary.” 

“you’re obnoxious and disliked, that cannot be denied.” 

“oh, ____, you are driving me to homicide!”

“we may see murder yet!”

[minaramen]

Gaku Yaotome - 16 Idol Album - Part 2: The uniform picking-up day from my memories

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

*Yaotome house*

Gaku: Finally, the day has come! I’m going to get my primary school uniform! I’ve been waiting for today for a lifetime!

Gaku: Eheh…!

Gaku *thinking*: Once I enter primary school, I’ll be closer to becoming a man! The backpack will be proof of that!

Gaku *thinking*: Mum told me that dad will take me once he’s back from work. I need to wait a little longer…

*Door opens*

Gaku: Ah, dad! Welcome back!

Sosuke: No running inside the house

Gaku: Sorry….you’re early, today

Sosuke: They basically spouted a bunch of nonsense just to force me to take the afternoon off

Sosuke: You’re supposed to go get the uniform and the backpack, right?

Gaku: ….! Yes! Are we going right now??

Gaku: I’m ready!!

Sosuke: Have you finished preparing your lessons?

Gaku: What?

Sosuke: I thought I told you to complete the textbook for the first semester by the time you enter school 

Sosuke: I bet you didn’t, right?

Gaku: I was planning to do today’s part when we got back from…

Sosuke: Enough of your excuses

Sosuke: You won’t get any uniform nor backpack until that textbook is finished

Sosuke: There’s no point in looking like a well dressed school boy if you have no substance 

Gaku *thinking*: I wasn’t making excuses, though…I do 10 pages everyday

Gaku *thinking*: He never looks at me when I study so hard, and he's treating me so harshly today too…that’s unfair…

Sosuke: What? If you want to say something, just say it

Gaku:....I’ll do it today….

Sosuke: Go take your textbook right now, then, and finish your work. I’m waiting

Gaku: Are you going to watch me study, dad?

Sosuke: Yes

Gaku *thinking*: Yeah!! I can finally show dad how good I am at studying!

Gaku *thinking*: I’m bad at math, but there are plenty of other things I can do! Dad will definitely praise me, he will say something like “you’re amazing, Gaku!”

Sosuke: Let’s start with math

Gaku: Eh…!

Sosuke: What?

Gaku: N-nothing…

Gaku *thinking*: Dammit…! Let’s hope there are no building block exercises…!

Sosuke: Today’s exercise is…. building blocks. You've struggled with it before

Gaku *thinking*: Must be a nightmare…!

Sosuke: Why are you making that face? You still don’t understand it? I've already explained how it works

Gaku: I-I understand it! This exercise is super easy!

Sosuke: You can solve it by yourself, then. C’mon, try

Gaku *thinking*: Okay, the blocks I can see are 1, 2, 3…uhm, 8?

Gaku *thinking*: The hidden blocks are, in the back, 1,2,3… there are 5….if I add 8…

Gaku: Answer is 13! Right?

Sosuke: Why are you looking at me? If you know the answer, write it in the appropriate column

Gaku: …I’m writing it right now…

Sosuke: You’ve only answered one question. How can you be satisfied with only getting one right?

Gaku: I-I’m not satisfied. It was a piece of cake, actually! I was just thinking about that

Gaku *thinking*: ….As expected, dad is so mean…

Gaku *thinking*: He wanted me to study and I got the correct answer, and still he didn’t praise me at all…

Gaku *thinking*: And to think that when mum told me he would finally be home, I even hoped he'd play with me… I'm so stupid

 Gaku *thinking*: I wanted him to play dodgeball with me, just like any other dad…

Sosuke: Hey, don’t make such an odd face

Gaku: Odd…?

Sosuke: Sticking out your lip like that, you’re clearly sulking. If there’s something that makes you unsatisfied, just say it

Gaku:...I’m not unsatisfied, but...

Gaku:.....

Gaku:....dad, have you ever played catchball?

Sosuke: Catchball?

Sosuke: You want to play that stupid game where you’re supposed to throw a ball at each other? I don’t see anything fun about it. It’s just a waste of time

Gaku: Everybody told me it’s fun! They said they play it everyday!

Sosuke: Just because other people say it’s fun, it doesn't mean it would be the same for you

Gaku: But…all the other kids at kindergarten say it’s fun…

Sosuke: If you buy everything people say, soon you’ll be taken away by the current. Have your own opinion on things 

Gaku: Buy…?

Sosuke: If everybody were to eat rocks and sand with a delighted expression, would rocks and sand look delicious to you?

Gaku: What, no! Absolutely not!

Sosuke: Don’t show interest in something just because everybody say it’s fun, then

Gaku: I was just thinking it sounded fun, that’s it! It can’t be helped!

 Gaku *thinking*: I just wanted to play it with you, dad…c’mon…

Gaku: I don’t want to be the only loser among the kids at school, when they have a catchball match…

Sosuke:..mpf, I see. You should practice, then

Gaku:....yeah..!!

Sosuke: Once you enter middle school, you’re supposed to have softball in your Physical Education curriculum

Sosuke: I’ll call a coach for you

Gaku: Eeh..? Coach?

Gaku *thinking*: So, I won’t practice with dad…?

Sosuke: One of my acquaintances is a former baseball player. I think he’s the right person

Sosuke: I’ll contact him today, so you can start next week

Gaku:......

Sosuke: Since it’s an acquaintance of mine, I want you to be extremely polite. Do you understand what I mean

Sosuke: I don’t know who he's connected with, so you must not break any rule of courtesy

Gaku: I’ll greet him properly! I will, but…

Gaku: I don’t need such a professional guy… I can just practice with you, dad…

Sosuke: That’s impossible. I have no time for that

Gaku:...well, maybe you talk like this because you don’t even know how to throw a ball

Sosuke:....what was that?

Gaku: I said that you probably suck at catchball

Sosuke: Don’t be stupid! You forget who you’re talking to!

Gaku: Those who don’t practice are most likely to be bad players

Gaku: They can’t reach their companions with the ball, so they do what is called “one bounce”

Gaku: And everybody says that being a “one bounce” player is lame

Sosuke: Mpf…rubbish…

Gaku: Are you a “one bounce” player, dad?

Sosuke: Why would I?!  Enough of that, focus on your studies

Gaku: ….you’re dodging the question…

Sosuke: Do you think I would do something like that?!

Gaku: Well, I’ve never seen you throw a ball

Sosuke:...it can’t be helped. I’ll show you later

Gaku: Ah….!

Sosuke: Once we’re be back from picking up your uniform we’ll play catchball, so I can give you the proof you need

Gaku: Really?! That’s amazing…!

Gaku: We’ll play catchball together, dad?! For real??

Sosuke: Only if you properly finish your exercises. If you don’t focus, we won’t be done on time

Gaku: Yes, yes! I’ll do it immediately!  I can finish exercises this easy in the blink of an eye!

Gaku: Thank you, dad…!

Gaku: Eheh…I was already looking forward to the uniform, but now there’s another thing I can’t wait for…!

Sosuke: Can you just tell me why you’re so happy?

Gaku: Mh? What?

Sosuke: …it doesn’t matter

Sosuke: I want you to be done in 15 minutes. If you’re late,we won’t go

Gaku:….! Got it!

Gaku: C’mon, then! To the next exercise!

End of part 2

TL notes: I don’t usually give my impressions on the stories I translate but this one made me feel sick, and part 3 is even worse so get ready. Sosuke is a person I just can’t empatize with. Don’t get me wrong - I find him a very well-written character, but definitely the worst father ever. The only one who’s worse than him is Tamaki’s dad, who is literally a violent alcoholic so... nothing to be proud of. I know Sosuke wanted Gaku to grow up strong and ready to face  the difficulties of life, but I think there’s no excuse for such an attitude towards a child - your own son! A kid should never beg for his parents’ love. 

I feel so bad for Gaku.