#it was such a rookie mistake

[cubfan135-facts]

cubfan135 fact #220:

Cub would never confuse the dV required to reach the sun with the dV to orbit earth AND miss the value of the karman line.

[blackberry-s0da]

Day 7: accident

Don’t draw so fast

[guardian-angle22]

911: Lone Star | S5E2 -> a rookie donut delivery mistake

[zedif-y]

i wondered why i didn't know much about the hermitcraft court case, then i realized the two people i keep up with are both not involved and completely unaware

[oxandthorn]

kitty kaiju and kafka

(after a week of being sick, i'm only now just getting a bit of energy to do things)

[notbecauseofvictories]

sometimes I think they put some sort of...aural drug in mediocre movies. If I played all these thoroughly middling movies in reverse, would I hear a satanic message telling me, YOU WILL BE TEMPTED BEYOND ALL REASON TO WRITE FANFIC ABOUT---YES, THE MOVIE YOU HALF-WATCHED WHILE COOKING AND ANSWERING EMAILS. YES. YES, I---YES, I'M SERIOUS. YES, THIS MOVIE. THE CHARACTERIZATION OR LACK THEREOF MAKES NO DIFFERENCE. UH HUH. MHM. YEP. LOOK, I DON'T MAKE THE RULES, I JUST WORK HERE OKAY?

[fallout-lou-begas]

Henry Kissinger has been found dead on the I-15 after trying to go north from Goodsprings directly to Vegas despite being warned about the deathclaw infestation at Quarry Junction

[fourfoldfires]

some friends drawn from memory!

[lexosaurus]

Oh boy, more of an excuse to be nerdy! Thank you for being complicit in this moment 🙏

So first, I actually did what I should have done before and said "Fenton" in a bunch of different contexts, and there were several cases where I did drop the /t/—specifically when I was talking quickly and/or offhandedly—which is pretty neat. Whether or not I glottal stopped or elongated the /n/ like a goddamn heathen really depended. This will tie into my overall thesis here of "humans are lazy."

So when I say shit like "easier," the reason I put it in quotes like that is because I'm talking wayyyy more broadly, which I probs should have specified. Humans are inherently lazy when we talk and if, collectively, we find one phoneme "easier" to say than the other, then collectively we'll swap. We can see this with /s/ vs /z/ pronunciations at the ends of words. If there's a vowel right before the plural ending, like in "bees" or "ideas" we will collectively replace the /s/ with a /z/ because it's "easier" for us to keep our voice on for the end of the word, than it is for us to switch it off for only one phoneme that doesn't change the inherent meaning of the word (say "bees" and "boats" to hear the /s/ vs /z/). But since we're lazy talkers, we'll go one step further and will devoice the /z/ as we're saying it, because we've finished the word, so what's the point of following through to the end?

In the case where if we say the /n/ then that sets us up to pronounce the /t/ off the bat and there's no additional tongue movement we need to make to get to the alveolar ridge, phonologically, that's pretty damn "easy" for our lazy mouths to commit to. Maybe still a bit begrudgingly, as /t/ is definitely one of the first phonemes to get swapped with something else or dropped entirely because it's a "hard" phoneme to pronounce compared to the others, but it's "easy" enough that there's not an overwhelming pull for a collective action to switch or drop/swap it like we see in words like "atom" vs "atomic" (/t/ turns to a tap) or at the end of "cat" (/t/ turns to a glottal stop or an unreleased t). We think, okay, the /ɛ/ in "fenton" is a mid vowel pronounced at the front of our mouth, so we're really really close to that /n/ anyway so we might as well just pronounce it, and then oh look we're all set up for that /t/ at the start of the next syllable, so we'll go ahead and pronounce it too. Barely extra work. Of course, there are totally people who will drop the /t/, because as I said /t/ is annoying to pronounce even on a good day, but collectively it's maybe not as popular as other allophones.

So, I got a little curious about the origins of the southern accent in general and which language you guys came into contact with to kickstart it, and like any other civil human being I turned to Wikipedia. In short, much of the Southern American English drawl originates from Scots-Irish immigration to the Southern US in the 17th and 18th century. This also got influenced in the 19th century from some parts of upper class London and West Africa via African-American slavery. As it happens when two dialects interact, often they smush together to create a new dialect via children (yes, I mean actual human children who grow up and pass the new lingo down to their kids). The South was directly affected after the American Civil War when the southern economy had a giant upheaval, and many southern farmers with that blended accent moved to Texas to start a new life. Those people came into contact with south midland US communities and Hispanic communities to make a new dialect baby, which became the stereotypical Texas accent.

Okay, I have to go fold laundry, but I hope this was fun to read!

[sisaloofafump]

Stephanie and Jason in makeshift disguises (they forgot their masks) (still remembered their guns tho) (and their matching hoodie vests)

Bonus:

[verysinglepieceofbread]

"you're more normal than me" ai di, baobei, you recently dragged him out of bed, cut him up a bit and tied him to a chair, and he was extremely happy about it. he's not normal, he's just quiet

[commander-ledi]

zevran accidentally fucked & married his target instead of killing him, and now crows cannot show their faces in ferelden anymore

[arkarti]

I'm sorry in your last Willry post...the..the hair grab???? HENRY GRABBING WILLIAM'S HAIR, LIKE THAT???? Dead. You have killed me off. Congratulations, the Fazbear franchise dies here because you keep killing off those poor restaurant workers with their hot bosses.

yes, the hair grab was very important to me 😳 jkahgjk glad u like it

help, that is the funniest way to die tho. rip in peace anon 😔

[loveshotzz]

He’s not tech savvy, and he doesn’t really like to be laughed at. It doesn’t stop you from giggling under your breath at every wrong button he presses. The lag on the connection from the remote to the TV consistently getting letters wrong.

“If you don’t stop…” he mutters, frustrated. The curl you love so much falling over his glasses while he leans further forward on the couch. He squints at the television, jutting the remote toward the screen in an angry thrust just to accidentally hit ‘delete’. You break, letting out a loud laugh that wakes Bandit up from his nap on the dog bed. Steve can’t help it, he laughs too, a chuckle birthed from how annoyed he is trying to set up a ‘party watch’ for the Friday the 13th movies with Peach and Eddie in New York.

It made his heart soften at any hint of his best friend that he found in you. Smirking to himself when you mentioned watching them whenever a Friday the 13th happened to fall. It’s like Ed spoke through you. So he made a whole plan for it — a stay at home date night where he made snacks, ordered cannolis, got a good fall candle, and set the lights to an eerie low red.

And it would be perfect if he could figure out how to get the fucking link to work.

“If you think it’s so easy, why don’t you do it tough girl?” he asks, putting the remote on the center cushion on the couch, “Go ahead, show me how smart you are.”

“You’re just not being patient,” you tease in a measured, holier-than-thou tone, “You have to be one with the remote.”

“Okay,” he says smoothly, “Show me then, karate kid. Show me how to become one with the remote.”

You can smell the spice and cedar on him when he inches closer, big hand closing over yours while you take the remote in your hand, slowly spelling out Eddie’s email address for the invite on the screen. A silence falls between you, feeling the scruff of his five o’clock shadow near your cheek.

“You’re showin’ off, angel,” he murmurs, he breath coasting over your ear.

“So what if I am?” you ask headily, turning your head so your lips nearly brush. The remote drops between you, noses teasing against each other with gentle smiles on your lips, eyes closing.

Steve’s phone rings, Eddie’s ringtone — Creep by Radiohead blowing from the speaker.

“Hold that thought,” Steve sighs. He picks up, screen reflecting himself back when he realizes it’s a FaceTime call.

“‘Yyyello,” Steve says, settling the phone against a mug of decaf on the coffee table. You sigh at the way he can’t help but answer the phone like a geriatric.

“I’ve been waiting for this invite for like, twenty minutes — what’s the deal?” Eddie asks, from the background it looks like his phone is in a similar spot. Halloween decorations set and ready, fairy lights flickering orange and purple hanging prettily on the wall.

“We’re getting there man, relax,” Steve says, taking his glasses off to massage the bridge of his nose, “Technical difficulties.”

“Or you just don’t know how to do it,” he grins, “Where’s your girl? Ask if she can help.”

“I’m trying,” you pipe up, putting yourself in the frame and waving.

“Hey lady,” he smiles lazily, “You teachin’ him a thing or two?’

“Every day,” you smile back.

“They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks,” Eddie shrugs, “So…”

“Well, you’re older than me, so,” Steve bites back.

“Ooh, I love when you’re a little mean,” Ed flirts, “Do it again.”

“The invite should come in for you in a couple minutes, are you on the main page? It’ll pop up there,” you say, picking the remote up again.

“Yeah, I’m ready when you are,” he nods. You both can hear the lock click in Ed’s apartment, his face splitting into a smile and gentle eyes.

“Hey baby,” he says to his wife off screen, “Com’ere we’re gonna watch Jason with St—”

Off camera you can hear Peach’s voice, soft, and laced with a hint of disappointment, “You decorated…”

His face quirks, “Yeah, d-do you not like it?”

“I like it but…you um, you did it without me. We were supposed to do it together.”

“Oh, honey,” he frowns, “Wait no, don’t frown like that — Peach…”

Eddie looks at the screen, “Sorry guys, can you send the invite in like a half hour? Peach, sweetheart, I’m so sorry…don’t be upset…I — fuck, hold on — Yeah, send it in like a half hour — bye.”

The call disconnects, leaving you both sitting there in the glow of the TV, the cursor blinking waiting for you to click ‘Invite’ now that Eddie’s email was successfully entered.

“All that and now we have to wait,” Steve snaps, “He’s never on time.”

“I feel bad,” you give a small pout in solidarity, “She sounded so sad.”

“She’ll get over it,” Steve lets out a breath, shaking his head like he’s used to this, “She just wants some attention. Speaking of…”

“Speaking of…?” you respond, turning toward him on the couch.

“We were having a lot of fun before we were interrupted,” Steve smiles, leaning forward, lips skimming your cheek to press a kiss by your ear, “And I can think of a few good ways to kill a half hour.”

- not Carol, oh wait, yes it is

🥺 i’ve been selfish and kept this to myself for a little while and have been reading it when i get overwhelmed at work. you spoil me bf 🥺💕 I love him so much.

[20dimensionsoftangerine]

The fact that Jacob seemed to genuinely believe Dang was about to get laid was so funny

This really is your first time in the dome, isn't it sir?

[redloftwingfeathers]

Worthy hero, unforgettable companion