#it was dick

[incorrectbatfamandfriends]

Twelve year old Robin, currently kidnapped: Is it true you used to date my dad?

Two Face: w h a t

[saltlaamp]

Do you think when the bats play cards against humanity the "Dead Parents" card is banned or do you think its like a trump-card like "The Placenta" or "Being a motherfucking socerer"

[kamikazeonwings]

characters have to be a little bit awful in ways that you cant defend. its good for the ecosystem. your honor he did do that. He did in fact do that

[how-surprising]

Hehehe 😊😘

[batsandbirdsandothers]

Inspired by this post - Jason and Duke having glowy eyes and freaking Bruce out

Bruce: Have kids, they said. It’ll be fun, they said. I thought I was gonna shit my pants.

Dick: But they’re so adorable, aren’t they?

Bruce: Unfortunately yes.

[newtid]

in spirit i am a 7th grade boy

[thecrowthatyellsow]

Some more Jason please enjoy the crumbs

[angelgemy]

"Do I look like him?"

[bruciemilf]

Bruce truly hates magic with every pump and beat of his heart.

What kinda curse is Slang, anyway?

“This is the best day of my life.”

“Bro really thought he ate with that.” Bruce physically feels a full body shiver, charged with nausea and cringe. “This is level 10 cringe. Can’t have shit in Gotham.”

Dick is his earth bound angel, but he laughs like a demon at him, holding onto Jason for support, pledging his eternal loyalty to Zatana and her pettiness.

—

“Hey, old bat, hook me up with an adrenaline shot.”

What he wants to say is Jay, do not try and fight with 6 bullets in your stomach.

What comes out instead, through Bruce’s grit teeth and intense, fierce glaring, “Not you trying to go back to your corpse era. See how I only took 2 shots? Very demure. Very mindful.”

Jason passes out from blood loss, but mostly laughter.

—

“Chat, is this real?”

Stephanie barely bites back a full belly cackle. “I think he just asked us if we copied.”

“I wish I was Jason, 15.”

—

“This is not a slay environment. Killing is flop behavior.” He keeps his eyes shut and buries his face in his hands. Trying to convince Damian not to stab someone doesn’t seem to work.

Damian gives him a pat like he’s a pitiful cat. “I’ll only stab the non lethal areas.”

“God, I wish that were me.”

[frownyalfred]

Jason: “I’m NOTHING like Bruce, okay? We’re not even that similar. That’s all in your head.”

Dick, perched on Jason’s couch watching him gear up, sipping a Batburger shake: “so you’re NOT about to go deal with your emotions by going out on patrol and beating people up?”

Jason: *sets down the brass knuckles he was just holding* *stares off into the distance*

Jason: “These are just…for my — look, I don’t like your fucking tone, Richard.”

[plaguedocboi]

Nature really went off with sperm whales. A 70-ton predator with teeth the size of a banana but it only eats squishy prey that it doesn’t even chew, it just schlorps them down whole like a vacuum cleaner. Big giant fat head full of goop. Tiniest fins in the world. Strong enough to smash a ship to pieces and smart enough to figure out how to do so but its first line of defense is just to shit everywhere. Possibly the most complex language in the animal kingdom and it creates sounds by blowing air through its internal right nostril (it uses the left one to breathe) into its giant fat head. It’s the loudest animal on the planet and might have the capability to create a beam of sound so loud it can shake your organs apart but they don’t seem to use that to hunt or fight. They’re highly flammable. We used them to make candles.

[ochibrochi]

america's sweetheart olympian 🥇

[batsandbirdsandothers]

Collection of “I’m Robin and being Robin gives me magic!”

Part 1 | Part 2 of Ghost Jason Series

[noooodle-snek]

Bruce showing Jason around after he first brings him home

Bruce: ...and don't worry all the chandeliers are reinforced so they won't break while you swing on them

Jason: Why would I do that?

Bruce: ...you don't want to swing on the chandeliers and parkour around the furniture?

Jason: No???

Bruce, tearing up: thank you

[flyrobinflyy]

NOBODY FUCKING MOVE.