#it turns out it's kinda fun actually
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Emerald hunting
#I havent drawn them in FOREVER!!! (two months)#artfight and then my own ocs kinda consumed my entire mind for a while there woah#also turns out backgrounds are actually kinda fun who woulda thought#sonic#sonic the hedgehog#sonic fanart#tails the fox#miles tails prower#sth#my art
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to my IRL(s) who keeps sending me disco elysium memes despite the fact i haven't played it in months THIS IS BECAUSE OF YOU. HELP ME. If people have ideas on this AU feel free to have fun with it considering I. have only a few!
#zombiecleo#ethoslab#hermitcraft#scopophobia cw#hermitcraft AU#tag ramble time!#don't. worry about the text. yes it's trying to imply that etho can see us and break the fourth wall Don't Worry About It#this AU really was 'i wanna draw hermits in DE outfits who's pathetic and sad enough to b– yeah it's etho.'#'that makes cleo Kim then. I think they'd make it work' and that was it#in my heart it's also an AT so they're working a different case somewhere else in universe. mostly because i don't think them and-#-cuno/cunoesse should exist at the same time.. etho can have a drug addiction but cleo is NOT getting called a faggot /lh#Cleo getting written as 'just cleo' in text is kinda silly i enjoy it. hopefully that wasn't used in the actual game and i forgot about it#art out the oven#art wise this was really fun i locked myself in values jail but the colours turned out reasonable anyway which is always nice#yes cleo has gauges and an undercut <3#[scheduled]#EDIT: oh god. i have to add a tag for this AU#Disco Hermits AU
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#bi twink x disaster lizard man 🤲#just vibes and trying stuff#i'm actually not super into how this lineart/pose turned out but the colours and weird circles are kinda fun#garashir#star trek ds9#ds9#deep space nine#garak#elim garak#julian bashir#cuties#artists on tumblr#digital art#illustration#star trek#ds9 fanart#idiots in love#otp: especially the lies#:')#eyestrain#kinda#sry#julian bashir/elim garak#julian bashir x elim garak#elim garak/julian bashir#elim garak x julian bashir
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BILLDUMP TIME (with transparency, because I can). Don't mind me, I'm just yeeting my goofy art at some way more talented individuals out of nowhere and then hauling ass back to the security of being a weird silent lurker ahaha
@tesscourtes and @beccadrawsstuff, respectively! These two Bills make a little prism of sorts together because of their recent crossovers on Patreon~ :3c Speaking of which, I highly recommend supporting both these artists! They do fantastic work! (TessCourtes and Beccup)
@qoolk on the left, and @monobmp on the right! I am such a sucker for these outfits~ OuO Go and check these two out, their art is phenomenal!!! >u<
@1spooky2me The most difficult Bill of the lot for me to draw, ahaha... Their art is so incredibly consistent and dynamic, I am, a little envious <:,) A little envious, but mostly impressed, so go look at their amazing art, what are you waiting for
And finally, @ckret2, whose writing is sublimely in-character and just a delight to read - they're a great artist, as well! I simply Could Not resist drawing their Bill in this ridiculous incredible and very fashionable pink feather dress, even though he only briefly wears it in their fic, so I also did a little bonus doodle of him in his standard hoodie to make up for it. XD (Also, as far as I'm concerned, Bill and Mabel were both correct in that lime green accessories make the dress Much Better.)
This is just a small selection of the human Bill designs I enjoy. I may draw and post more later on, who knows! Feel free to reblog with some neat Bill designs, either your own or by other folks - if any of the designs particularly call to me, I'll add them to the little list I've got going~ :D (Alternatively, if you really like my stuff and want me to draw something specific, you could...mmm...perhaps, commission me...? OuO)
Also I'm tagging Billford because uhhhh yeah, sorry not sorry, every single one of these Bills is getting shipped with Ford by the artists in some way or another, lmao
#fanart#gravity falls#bill cipher#human bill cipher#human bill design#billford#bill is just so Gender#regardless of whether or not he's a triangle. just. such Gender. wow#honestly tempted to draw the OG twink!bill and the mangopablo save-the-town!bill just for funzies#i may also attempt to draw alex hirsch's “canon” human!bill but uhhhh who knows LOL#i kinda feel like he made the design extra ugly just to poke fun at the fandom#so the “canon” aspect of it is kinda up in the air for me personally LMAO#not sure if i drew goldilocks!bill thicc enough tbh#just. look. it's hard to draw a person who is as close to triangular as a human can possibly get. ok??? ok#I TRIED AND THAT'S WHAT'S IMPORTANT OnO#in other news why did these turn out so much better than the drawings of my own design??? wtf that's so rude#get it together ME this is fukken embarrassing#btw if i draw something for you and you respond to thank me only to have me say nothing back it's because i am very awkward and anxious lol#there is also the adhd which makes me forget that i failed to respond like a normal person would have ahahahaha o-o#but mostly it's the horrors of being perceived for more than the two seconds it takes to yeet an art at a person O-O#why am i like this? good question! maybe i'll have an answer someday when i can actually afford therapy XD#I SHOULD HAVE BEEN ASLEEP FIVE HOURS AGO
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Hey, what makes a character a 'plot device but not a character'? And how do you not do that? I'm trying to do it on purpose but also I need to still make them interesting because it's on purpose, yknow?
A good skill to pick up is to learn to criticise criticism itself. A "plot device" is simply a thing that moves the plot along, it's a neutral literary analysis term! Usually, when people are angry that "a character has been used as a plot device," it doesn't mean they hate plot devices. It means they're gesturing at something deeper.
Runningwind and Bumble are equally plot devices in their deaths. They are both killed by the antagonist to escalate political tension. Runningwind is rarely "accused" of just being a plot device, and yet, we're talking about Bumble for the same thing.
So, why?
Well, Runningwind is just a background character, but in life, he was a part of the community. He was characterized as impatient but responsible. Yet, he wasn't SO important that he died with a bunch of unresolved plot threads.
He is mostly an extension of the entity of ThunderClan. His killing by Tigerstar, and the fear and paranoia that settles on the group after this, feel like a progression of the story insteas of something forced.
Bumble, on the other hand...
Is hated immediately by Gray Wing, when she's established as Turtle Tail's friend. Bumble's abuse at Tom the Wifebeater's hands invites even MORE investment. The rejection is shocking and upsetting. There's a story there about our main characters being imperfect; jealous, bigoted, and judgemental.
But, she is simply killed off. Everything they set up for this character is gone with little personalized fanfare. It's not a tragedy with a lesson about cruelty, or something anyone regrets.
It's just... plot. Gray Wing whinging that no one will like his shitty brother now that his body count is 2.
More than that, in the discussion of women in particular, "Fridging" was coined to give a name to the way women characters often don't get their stories told at all. There is a CULTURAL trend of female characters facing disproportionate violence, for the sake of advancing male plots.
Bumble has a lot going for her. Petal had a lot going for her. Turtle Tail had a lot going for her. Bright Stream had a lot going for her. When they died, they took their potential with them.
It's not always wrong to kill off a character of high potential, mind you. In Gurren Lagann, Kamina's death is sudden and shocking, leaving a massive hole in the hearts of the cast that never heals. Grappling with that loss, but also letting his memory fuel them, is a major theme of that story.
All that to say... there's no formula for avoiding it. You've gotta identify what the deeper issue is, in your specific narrative.
I can't say for certain what that will look like for your story, but here's some things I keep in mind;
When you make characters who exist to die, make sure they're people before you axe them.
Ask yourself; what about them does the cast miss?
If they just miss them because they were (pre-existing relationship), go back to the drawing board.
Fluttering Bird as an example. Who was she? Dead sister. Why do they miss her? Dead sister. No traits until after her death.
Runningwind was short-tempered and helpful. Kamina was a valuable leader who made people believe in a brighter future. Swiftpaw was fiesty and desperate to prove himself. The better characterized, the more profound the loss usually is.
If this is a female character who is dying just to serve the plot, be aware of cultural bias and tropes. How is the gender ratio looking in your cast? Is this happening disproportionately with your girls?
Note how Quiet Rain's litter had both a boy and a girl, but the girl was chosen to be "weaker" and wither away.
And how most of the time in DOTC, whenever a man had to be upset, a girl would get killed for it.
If you ever feel like the character on the chopping block is NOT a full character, ask yourself why it needs to be a character at all. You don't need to spend narrative time building out someone when a literal object of high value might suffice.
"My sister died when I swore to protect her and I can't face my family" = Old. Tired. Ive seen this.
"I lost my heirloom sword when I swore to protect it and I can't face my family." = Fascinating. Why was the sword so valuable? Will they really not take you back? How did you lose it?
When you do kill off "high value" characters, try to make sure you're not leaving too many plot threads hanging. Or at least make a point of how they will never get closure.
#Bones gives advice#These questions can be hard for me to advise on because making characters is one of the easy parts for me.#It's more the “working them into a story without overwhelming it” part#But making characters that are fun and interesting has always come naturally to me as a writer.#I just work out some fun dialogue and fill in what their wants and desires would be based on backstory#And the rest kinda fills itself out as the message and themes of my narrative forms.#In fact the thing that makes BB so easy for me to work on is having an existing “story template” in mind#I don't have to chart out the long term events in advance because I do have a full picture of what leads where#And what I want to say with each rework.#I've always been told I'm really good at killing off characters though#Especially in my RP days. I remember I singlehandedly turned a pretty standard 'escape from evil lab' plot into--#--a painful story about loyalty and suffering. I was the main villain and the escapees knew he would never give up.#Because he loved their master and believed fully in the idea of 'sacrifice for the greater good.'#Always friendly. Passionate. Would have been a dedicated leader in a slightly different setting.#They knew he would never want to actually hurt them so they had to trick him into trying to ��coral” them with his fire powers on ice#He didn't know it was ice and melted through#I guess the thing I do is just... make them cool lmao. It's hard to give advice on this#''Draw the rest of the owl 4head''
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do not fret
self indulgent clover……what the scallop!!
#inanimate insanity#clover ii#ii clover#Inanimate insanity clover#ii#osc#eyes tw#<— kinda???#this was actually fun to draw!!!#wanted to practice rendering a bit and it turned out rlly cool!! :33
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so i saw this old-ish post about an au centering around a villain lewis and a hero arthur,,, and i. may have gotten attached to it,, dkdndkdjs. so i decided to make some edits + doodles based on it!! i also really wanna make a lil oneshot about it as well,, but uh... whether or not i actually follow through on that, we'll see,, skdjsojdks.
edit: good news, gang,, i wrote the fic!!
#my art#mystery skulls animated#lewis pepper#msa lewis#arthur kingsmen#msa arthur#really happy with how their designs came out !!!#it was a bit of a struggle to make lewis not just look like how he is in canon but with a cape;;#but i think the patterns + sugar skull makeup help a lot!#imagining lewis has the power to just turn into a ghost form;; which he uses for villain stuff. think danny phantom#(<- has never watched danny phantom)#and arthur's just kinda like batman; makes his own gadgets and stuff! i imagine his metal arm also has some fun doodads in it#still debating on why exactly arthur is so beat up in the potential fic; so far i'm thinking maybeeee reverb?#or maybe just some unknown new villain guy#and yes i know there's additions in the post i linked where everyone agrees it was actually mystery#not even murder mystery just. mystery.#i am politely ignoring that. bc i don't like that.#mystery is just vivi's not-dog in my version of this au.#'vivi please don't try and break into a dangerous supervillain's lair to try and rescue some hero' he says to her#meanwhile vivi's already halfway there#being vivi's dog is a full-time job
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fatt pin-up week 1 - i misremembered the prompt as "hard at work". oh wellll
outfit ref
#i realized this while reblogging other ppls art & did not want to pivot.#mako trig#counterweight#friends at the table#fatt#fatt pinup week#rosa art#his ass is not doing manual labor#nothing in the prompt flavor text applies either sorry guys#'simple satisfaction of a job well done' yeah.about that#good mako though turned out nicely over all.#it was actually fun to have a ref for the clothes even though i just kinda fucked around w/ folds & lighting
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oh boy !! ! ! ! !!! ! thANK y0u all for the kind words on my last art posts. you all get it and i was/still am so happy about it
as promised, here's some close-ups of the comic for image quality's sake, and other screenshots i rescued from the community whiteboard (and something else)
first up another sketch of mystery gender-ambiguous being. (please send me more name ideas for them if you got one- i like to hear em! (reminder it's the side character that appeared for <10 seconds in AvM Ep. 30))
a few fav scenes
emotional support cwab
they weren't meant for this purpose exactly, but i do have countless "fluffy sticks" loose in my notes and homework sheets from the school years.
papery critter.
even when i wasn't confident in fur or feathers, they helped me practice posing and create some satisfying gradients/flowing poses. (im a sucker for good tail poses) (oh yay! i found a good pic...)
and finally, little sneak peak for you for reading so far ;3
i realized that whiteboardfox is pretty great for my working needs. simple and to the point and all. feels nice with the mouse and the tablet.
so i started hashing out a big project idea just to see if it holds up and
[
several hours later ...
]
oh
oh man
it's a little bigger than i expected
<next>
#--/ art#alan becker#animator vs animation#animation vs minecraft#Minecraft bed#ava the dark lord#ava the chosen one#me when the project that obviously wasn't going to be done in one night isn't done in one night: D: !?!?!?!?#kudos to whoever routed the Speedrun actual short because that one is so fun and clean and savvy#clever made up time-savers? includes orange's TNT shield-jump?? nonlethal dragon dispatch??? sweet#ithink you can see where i tried to head with this#turns out that turning up the complexity 98 notches higher makes things trickier to parse hmmmmmm?#in fact i might need some help with this one ;>v>' like a lot.#i had a bit of a story and route set up already i just... wanted to make sure everything was at least kinda there...................#we'll see#the pie joke. i was trying to categorize which foodstuffs chosen should be able to make on the fly. with their flame hands.#ex. cooking meats makes sense because flint and steel works for the same purpose (you can kill a burning animal to get cooked meats)#but baking bread or drying kelp seems way more involved or whatever -> needs a proper furnace environment#HOWEVER... i noticed that Steve can just summon pumpkin pies from his bare hands if he wants to without even a workbench. so. sure! lol.#this is scraping the surface of the minutiae i want to consider#(ALSO KUDOS to everyone who RUNS/works on all-advancements. of course. riding on your shoulders here)#final joke is that chosen didn't know how crazy this undertaking would be to learn#but dark is very literally programmable. so you could maybe just plug some TAS instructions into him and off he goes#or even more open-ended than that just give him the list of advancements + stipulations + the wiki and similar result#it'd get done but. i dont think he'd find that fun at all. prefers to write his own instructions if you see what i mean#i might be forgetting some context. it is rather late you see. please ask me questions about this! ;P#tco aa
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i don’t know if i’m ever gonna write the fic but i’ve been thinking abt like. the eternal stockade. the implications. lup, a lich who was trapped in a dark featureless cell for a decade completely isolated with nothing to keep her sanity but her own mind. she has to put people in the eternal stockade. how many liches does she see herself in. how many liches started out just like her. how many liches are truly too far gone. and the only liches we ever see other than her and barry are edward and lydia. they’re certainly evil, but mad? they seem pretty sane. they’re not, like, tattered echoes of souls, they’re definitely still people. even as much of a grudge as lup surely has against them, wouldn’t they remind her incredibly strongly of herself? do they deserve to be trapped just like she was? for eternity? isn’t eternity what turned john to existential despair in the first place?
#mine#taz balance#taz lup#lup#like idk i think lup’s down to kick necromancer ass but when it comes to being like. WARDENS of a PRISON. would that not be uncomfortable??#but like taking the job is the only way to avoid HER being thrown in prison??#idk the raven queen being a cool & chill goddess boss is definitely fun but when you actually think abt it#i don’t think i’d agree with her. i think if i lived in that world i’d think she were sort of evil#which like also to get into the hunger vs authority its not very explored because its not at all the point#the hunger is meant to be nihilism and despair and dissatisfaction its at its core an emotional story about joy & love#but like john starts out rebelling against laws. laws of the universe; except that it turns out a being wrote those laws (jeffandrew)#so the hunger is also sort of a force of rebelling against unjust constraints in the pursuit of freedom?#and the heroes end up preserving the status quo and saying you just have to find joy within those unjust limitations#which again. like. the point is that life is unfair and you can find joy and meaning despite it. which is true to real life.#i’m not saying the hunger was right or that despair is the only way or w/e like#yk like taz balance is not a story about society its more about. philosophy i guess#the point is that life’s really hard and you find meaning anyway and that’s preferable to despair and death#thematically for the audience we understand these are standins for ways of viewing reality#and in the real world reality is what it is. its just the world. there’s no authority that writes the laws of nature#like its not a ‘man vs authority’ story its a ‘man vs nature’ story#but IN UNIVERSE nature IS an authority. jeffandrew and the gods. regardless of how much joy you can find in an unjust world#if i lived in it i’d want to make it more just! but anyway like yeah barry & lup working for the raven queen#is kinda an extension on that idea of preserving the status quo#although i guess you could say gods are just forces of nature. theyre not PEOPLE theyre just personifications of existent natural laws#and it ties in w istus and fate as well#although fate is like a comforting guiding force rather than restricting & horrifying#^ pay no attention to any of this i don’t think it really means anything i’m just like. writing thoughts as i have them#not like a hard stance i’m taking just exploring some ideas#any ways#THERES A TAG LIMIT??
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the costume design was a highlight
#danganronpa despair time#drdt#veronika grebenshchikova#arturo giles#verturo#fanganronpa#red flags meme#no shot i'm actually the first person to draw this right lol#missing the first two years(?) of the fangan means someone else must have beat me to it#nevertheless imitating the video's art style was super fun!#it kinda reminds me of the monster prom art style#i'm kinda bored of my current drawing style and i really like how this turned out so maybe i'll try using some of what i learned again#i love this duo they're so funny. i ALMOST put them together in my duos post so consider this makeup#sorry for all the arturo posting lately hsdfkfdl he's not even my favorite it's just what's come to mind#fanart#drawing#tw eyestrain#also nsft warning for the song/link itself but not the artwork
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harbinger banquet ✨
scara live reaction across the long table ^
i have stuff to yap about this piece! as you may notice harbinger!yue’s name there is ‘brighella’ which is taken from commedia dell’arte (following all the other harbingers names) so i took one from there too! BUT her real name is still yue, just like how arlecchino is called arlecchino but her real name is peruere or how tartaglia’s real name is ajax and so on ^^
harbinger!yue’s codename is ‘the prevaricator’ which basically gives a bit of an insight to her character — a cunning and deceitful individual who avoids the truth when speaking. (this may or may not have led to her rank being unacknowledged !!!) her codename also relates to her commedia dell’arte name in some way since brighella is known as a masterful liar.
i do want to make an ‘about: the prevaricator’ voiceline from wanderer himself KSJJSJDJSKAKS (since i made him one with yue (the akademiya scholar) too ><
also, i did do one with just ‘yue’ but it felt so out of place hence why i used a commedia dell’arte name for harbinger!yue :3 anyway thabk u for coming to my yap session
#yue’s art#genshin!yue#okay OKAY#KAJDKSJS i spent like how many days doing this and it turned out somewhat okay (at least i actually kinda like how it looks!)#HARBINGER!YUE ATTENDING THE HARBINGER BANQUETTTTTTTT#(also a certain puppet’s present wink wonk)#ik he drooling across the table rn……..#LMFAOOKSNDKSJSMDMD#anywho i found this really fun and i will be doing more of these#<- specifically eyeing yue version with kabukimono (i think that one would just be me being a shrine maiden and meeting him while he#wandered around inazuma)#but we shall see!#i love self shipping w scara sm because u can have three different versions of it like wow thank you for giving me versatility <3#genshin impact oc#genshin oc#also this is queued cause like im running away scared !
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late night Wels in a cute outfit
#really wanted to draw wels for a while and suddenly got an urge to draw thinghs idk what to tell you#it collided#kinda really love how he turned out#i probably shouldnt post it right now because 0 people are online but yk#just have him#im sleepy and really like him#welsknight#hermitcraft#court jester's dress moment#skirts also get into this tag yes#court jester's art#also i dont actually know why people draw wels with wings i always wondered#if you know tell me please#but i just love to draw wings really i dont need to be talked into it really i see wings im in#also with how i draw his hair long and pretty straight he looks really like false which is pretty fun i think
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So I went and watched all the possible endings, and it confirmed something I had been thinking, which is that the redemption ending choice is, perhaps, the most immediately regretful one--but that they all come with some form of regret. In the redemption ending, Rook has to knowingly deny themselves the catharsis of retribution (should they desire it, which, at least for me it felt difficult not to) in order to offer Solas one last, painful chance to do the right thing. That willful denial of your own catharsis feels like an immediate regret. Giving Solas the opportunity to pursue atonement might very well be the best choice all around, but it is also incredibly painful to offer that to someone who has done so many terrible things (not a small amount to you personally). Why does he deserve another chance? Especially when so many dead (including a beloved mentor) lie in his wake? Which, I suppose, is the point: he doesn't. But you offer it anyway and it SUCKS ASS, because how could it not?
I don't know how this plays with other story choices (a sacrificed Davrin or a Harding who embraced her anger, for example), but within the context of my own choices, I can imagine an immediate satisfaction to either tricking or fighting him--especially the trick ending, where you can actively name drop Varric--but it feels like the sort of thing that would feel worse as more time passes. Once you've calmed down and are able to ask yourself if that's what the people you've lost really wanted. Varric, in Regret Superhell, didn't want vengeance. He just wanted his friend to walk a better path. And Harding always believed there was another chance for anyone, so long as you kept reaching a hand out for them--even when it sucked ass. So the redemption ending feels like a sort of indignance, an instant regret for not doing worse, for not getting comeuppance, for being forced to eschew satisfaction (related: I wonder if the Inquisitor feels those things as well coming out of this ending, considering how long they've lived under the shadow of Solas' actions). Conversely, the other two endings feel like an immediate satisfaction, because you got to trick the trickster with all the wits Varric taught you, or because you finally got to punch him in the face and it felt really good. But I feel like those endings would come with a creeping regret, something that sneaks up on you later, especially when remembering the fallen and what they would have wanted you to do. Ultimately, because of that, it feels like no ending is devoid of regret. Which I suppose, is rather thematic.
#i did actually watch the redemption ending on youtube with someone who had a male inquisitor and i felt less rageful about it lmao#it was the Convocation Of 3.5 Women i think that had me most like 'are you KIDDING me' about it#but also the areas where it feels bad or unsatisfying (to intervene like that i mean) are like. well yeah it would feel awful wouldn't it#to have to plead and persuade and TRUST someone to make the better choice by choosing the high road yourself#as it turns out the high road kind of sucks! it will probably feel better in the long run but at first blush it ain't fun!#so it's an interesting trade-off of regrets to be made between these endings. and really makes it clear that offering atonement#can kind of feel awful in your bones. even if it's the right thing to do. and so you do it anyway#*through gritted teeth* no one is past saving rook. i have to believe it or none of this matters#obviously user mileage may vary--if you really hated that guy maybe you didn't feel bad at all about choosing a harsher ending!#but this is based on MY pov and i know. if i'd chosen one of those ones i would have felt BAD about it#like i was letting down harding and varric#so i chose the ending that lacked personal catharsis because it's the one that honored my friends#which is interesting tbh as an exploration of regret as a theme#datv spoilers#rosie plays games kinda okay#that dragon sure does age
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is. is it too late to add onto the Mind in a dress art?
#chonny jash#chonnys charming chaos compendium#cj mind#oh wow this is kinda bad actually#my art#fun fact! i actually drew all three of em in a dress#i just liked the way mind's turned out the most
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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