#it took me 7 years but. I watched it! and i liked it a lot! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

klaus-littlestwolf · 8 months ago

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Heyy hiii I love your blog🤍 If you're still taking requests... Could you write an Aemond Targaryen who is obsessed with his half-sister or aunt?

(Fuck yes I can!

For this story the ages are a little off which frustrates me but I did that to make sure that Y/n wouldn’t be considered ‘too old’ to marry. If however, the person who made this request wants something with an older OFC, like a cougar-y kind of story with him obsessed and willing to do anything to have her then let me know and I will try my hand at that for you)

Y/n had been born first just before her mother Aemma had died giving birth her twin brother, who sadly died just a few hours later, leaving Y/n alone.

Rhaenyra took very good care of her, as much as she could as her younger sister was just a babe and now had no mother and no father as Viserys had all but checked out…especially after marrying Alicent and having more children.

Y/n was only just under 1 year older than Aegon as Alicent had gotten pregnant almost immediately after the wedding however as Rhaenyra was having her own children she took care of her sister less and less, leaving the girl on her own a lot of the time. Alicent had taken a liking to the young girl and they were quite close, which is what led to Y/n and Aemond’s relationship in the first place. Aemond loved Y/n from the moment he was born. When he was with her he was always content and happy, but if she left him alone he would cry and scream for her until Alicent could no longer take it and sent for her once again. That lasted until the boy was about 3 and she was 6 and from then on he was basically attached to her skirts.

Neither of the children had a dragon to their name and spent their time dreaming of flying across the 7 kingdoms together. Aemond had always promised to take his half sister with him when he mounted a dragon one day, and though Y/n thought it a nice dream, Aemond was determined to make it come true. He swore to her that one day he would be strong and that he would protect her, no one would ever bully them again. Y/n did not know just how seriously her younger brother took that vow.

He was 9 years old when Rhaenyra moved to Dragonstone and snatched his happiness away as she took their 12 year old sister with her and it was at that moment that Aemond realized how in love with his sister he really was. She would be his, no matter what he had to do to ensure it.

When they met again on Driftmark it was like no time had passed, they stayed by each others side while everyone mourned, but Aemond wasn’t sad, he was determined. With the death of Laena there was now an unclaimed dragon, the largest one alive and he was going to claim her or die trying. To say Y/n was upset that he risked his life to mount Vhagar would be an understatement however he had done it and the pride and happiness on his face wiped away her anger…for about 10 minutes before watching her nephew slice her brothers eye from his head. She held close to his side for as long as she was allowed, holding his hand as the maester stitched him up painfully.

‘I do not wish to frighten you with my scarred face sister, you shouldn’t have to see this.’ He told her later that night as she sat beside his bed to watch over him, the milk of the poppy he had taking quick effect as his good eye began to close against his wishes.

‘You could never scare me brother, you are as handsome as ever and anyone who says otherwise is blind. I will never fear you, no matter what. I love you too dearly.’ She swore, curling up into her chair and drifting off by his side in case he needed anything during the night.

Aemond’s hand held tight to hers all night long, never letting go as if terrified, even in his sleep, that she would disappear.

Aemond was comforted by her words and it is the only thing that got him through the next years. That and the fact that he had “convinced” his sickly father to betroth Y/n to him.

Aemond was told by the men he paid to keep watch over his Princess on Dragonstone that Rhaenyra had been trying to betroth her to Cregan Stark of Winterfell. The Wolf in the North was apparently quite taken with his Princess and Aemond couldn’t blame him, but he would kill him if the man went anywhere near his sister and he made that perfectly clear to his mother and Grandsire. Aemond had vowed that if they didn’t betroth him to Y/n immediately that he would take Vhagar and have her burn Winterfell and every Stark in existence to the ground. He would melt all of the snow in the North if he had to to make his point. Both Alicent and Otto knew that her son was serious and would do exactly as he promised, they also knew that no one could stop Vhagar if Aemond decided to put his threat into action and so they had the King order the marriage.

However other than Rhaenyra acknowledging the order from the King, he heard no word from his betrothed until he was 18 and it was ordered that she return to Kings Landing to be with her soon to be husband. Aemond had kept eyes on her since the day she had been forced to leave him, men that worked for Rhaenyra were secretly under his command, 2 of which became Y/n’s personal guards and wrote the Prince everything about her so that Aemond didn’t miss a thing. He knows all of her interests, what she loves to do everyday, her daily schedule, the foods she likes and more importantly doesn’t like, and he also had them ensure that no man got close to his future wife in anyway. He knew that Jace had an interest in his aunt, the guard reporting to him that the boy had been grounded to his chambers on more than one occasion for watching her bathe or trying to sneak into her rooms in the night and it both enraged and delighted Aemond that Jace wanted his sister but also that he would have to see her happy with the person that Jace hates most. Aemond would ensure that he could rub it in his nephews face that the babes that Y/n would bare would never be anyone’s but his.

Over the years since she had been gone her brother had changed, not just at her having been missing from his side but especially after Aegons actions in taking him to the silk streets on his 13th nameday. Aemond felt disgusting but he was determined to be a better husband than his elder brother was, after all, Y/n was his. His sister, his wife, his everything and he would ensure her happiness. He would make her his and fill her with as many Targaryen babies as possible, Aemond couldn’t wait to see her swollen with his child at his side and in his bed, his elder sister was just too perfect not to be full of his children for the rest of her days.

2 days after the letter was sent to Rhaenyra he was greeted by the sound of huge wings and angry dragon roars as the large black dragon descended on the Red Keep, a dragon that everyone recognized instantly which prompted them scattering like mice. Aemond had heard that his sister had mounted the cannibalistic dragon but to actually see the creature was incredible. He found it funny that his sister, who was a loner with a tendency to be aggressive ended up with the aggressive loner dragon who would have burned anyone else to dust…he must feel how similar they are, honestly it was a fairly perfect fit if you asked him. Though he could have done without the teeth bore in his face from this scarred beast.

He got as close as he dared, watching as a beautiful women slid down the dragons neck to her feet, the dragon nuzzling her and nearly knocking her from her feet (though the gesture was gentle for such a giant dragon who had to be just slightly bigger than Caraxes) before he took to the skies again and left her to look around the courtyard.

She was a vision, more than Aemond could have imagined after all these years without her and as she turned to see him for the first time, the smile that lit up her face gave him butterflies. ‘Aemond? Wow! Look how you’ve grown, you are certainly not that little boy I remember anymore, you are a man grown! Look at this handsome face!’ Aemond took her hand and pressed his lips to her knuckles in greeting, unable to look away from her perfect purple eyes.

‘You are a vision, more beautiful than I could have imagined…and I have imagined for years.’ Her cheeks turned a pretty shade of pink as she blushed and he held his arm out for her to take. ‘Come, I will show you to your chambers and you can freshen up, I know you must want out of your riding clothes-‘

‘Actually…I had hoped we could go riding together like we always promised we would. My sister would not let me come to Kings Landing before now but you did swear to take me on Vhagar when I returned.’ She reminded him as he guided her through the halls of the castle.

‘I could never forget my promise to you, however we will not be permitted to disappear together the night before our wedding, it would be improper after all.’ He teased making her roll her eyes with a smile.

‘Right because riding a 10 ton scaly lizard into the night is definitely a romantic evening.’ She paused after saying that before speaking again. ‘Actually, never mind, for a Targaryen that has to be the most romantic night possible. We’ll save it for tomorrow night.’

‘As you wish sister. Here is your chamber for the night, tomorrow night your things will be moved into one of our own. You change and get comfortable, I will return in a half an hour and we can take a walk in the gardens, how does that sound?’

‘That sounds lovely brother. I look forward to it.’ Aemond leaned down and pressed his lips to her hand like the gentleman he was, watching once again as her face grew pink and he loved her sweet blush, vowing to make it happen as often as possible.

The wedding that next evening was a huge affair. Everyone was present, members of every house in attendance for the event, and even all of the peasants celebrated as they left the Sept, throwing flowers and cheering their congratulations as they had all loved Y/n since the moment she was presented to the world as a baby (often ordering the gold cloaks to feed the poor, especially the children in need). Rhaenyra and Daemon had shown up with the children late, clearly hating being there for a marriage they didn’t want and Aemond couldn’t help but silently gloat to Jace who glared at him all through dinner. As they locked eyes Aemond could not resist giving in to his petty attitude, leaning down and touching his lips to his wife’s and enjoying the feel of her lips pressing against his in return as she clearly enjoyed the show of affection. His nephew glared harder at him before eventually taking Helaena’s hand and bringing her to dance as if trying to anger the One-Eyed Prince but nothing could do that right now, not now that Aemond has everything he’s ever wanted.

‘Would you like to retire now my beautiful wife? I want to make this marriage official before one of the dozens of men here that are jealously staring, attempts to steal you away from me.’

‘As if anyone else could take my attention away from you.’ At that moment there was suddenly the sound of several women screaming and they both turned to see that right in front of the Kings table Jace was locked in a physical fight with a man on the dance floor. Aemond turned his wife’s body away and pulled her to his chest to shield her, not wanting her innocent eyes to see such violence. Even if he enjoyed watching Jace get hurt he knew that his wife would never be the same if she was forced to potentially witness him die and he loved her innocence too much to let that be ruined. The guards pulled the man out of the hall and most likely to the Black Cells after Daemon had saved Jace from being butchered, following along with a rage filled Rhaenyra to question the man. Y/n pulled away from her husband and moved to the floor, inspecting her nephews face and Aemond nearly growled as Jace leaned into the affection. ‘Are you alright nephew?!’

‘Yes, of course, I am fine. I had it under con-‘

‘Thank goodness Daemon was here! You could have been killed! What were you thinking?!’ She demanded and Aemond watched on as Jace’s face fell once again. ‘You are my sweet nephew, not a soldier or a brawler in the streets!’

‘I don-I’m-Uh…‘

‘She is right nephew, we could never forgive ourselves if you had been hurt attending our wedding…perhaps it is time for you to retire for the evening. Too much wine makes the mind do stupid things.’ Y/n nodded along with Aemond but Jace just glared at him.

‘This has nothing to do with you Uncle! Keep your thoughts to yourself! I don’t need-‘

‘Jacaerys! How Dare You?! Have care how you speak to your own family, Aemond is simply showing his concern for your well being! If this is your current state then he is correct, you should retire. I’m sure Luke will help you to your bed, won’t you sweet boy?’ Luke nodded his head, moving to take his elder brothers arm.

‘No! I don’t need to-‘

‘We should be retiring as well anyway. I must ensure my new wife is taken care of…’ Y/n blushed at her brothers words, leaning into his body as his hands found her waist comfortingly.

‘You are right brother, I think I have had enough partying for one day. We have a family dinner tomorrow evening anyway, we can celebrate more then.’ Suddenly Aegon, who had been drunkenly enjoying this whole situation, was grinning in excitement and stepping up to the newly weds, hand on his younger brothers shoulder.

‘Yes brother, time to retire. The bedding ceremony must be seen to before the end of the evening! I shall get our Grandsire and elder sister to-‘

‘No!’ Aemond snapped, everyone that was listening jumping in fright at the rage in his voice. He had felt his wife’s body tense as she pulled him closer by his jacket that she was now clinging to for dear life. ‘There will be no bedding ceremony, I will have neither my sister nor my wife gawked at in her most vulnerable state as if she is some cheap whore on the street of silk! Y/n is my wife now, and no one else will ever see her in such a way ever again. I assure you brother, I can handle consummating my marriage just fine without your wandering eyes and words of encouragement.’ Aemond looked back down at his bride and took her face into his hands, wiping away the tears that escaped in her moment of panic, no one having mentioned a bedding ceremony and Aemond himself having assured her that it would not be happening.

‘My young Prince, it is tradition to have a maester and at least 3 members of the family present to ensure the wedding is consummated. Your brother, myself, Rhaenyra and Daemon are going to-‘

‘No Grandsire, you are not-because if you try to enter our marital chambers tonight, or really any night from this moment forward for any reason under the sun, I will break your spine and be feeding you to either Vhagar or the Cannibal in the morning. I will let my wife decide which she would prefer to make a meal out of your body as it is her you are offending. I am uncomfortable with how determined you are to watch me make love to my wife, and I am telling you that it will not happen.’

‘Aemond! You cannot speak to your Grandsire this way, you must-‘ Aemond cut his mother off quickly, startling her as he had never spoken to her like this before.

‘Do not make the mistake of believing my words to be exaggeration mother, they are not. Anyone who steps foot into our marital chambers this night or any moment from this one onward will find themselves being fed to a dragon of my wife’s choosing. She is my wife! And it is my job to care for her as such! I will not have her humiliated or upset as she gives herself to me for the first time…or any time. That is the end of the discussion, however you may wait in the hall and once we are done I will deliver you the sheets from our bed as your proof. That will have to suffice because it is all that you are getting.’ He looked back down at Y/n who had tears in her eyes once again but this time they were not fearful or embarrassed, but grateful and full of love. ‘Come my wife, it is time that I make this marriage official and fill you with my son. I must give my wife all of the lovely Targaryen babies that her heart desires.’

Aemond bent down slightly before lifting Y/n into his arms like a babe, whisking her away and out of the party. ‘Thank you Aemond…I know I should just accept it but I-‘

‘My wife will never be seen by anyone but me in any state of undress from this moment on, and should anyone sneak a peak at you I will deliver you their heart and feed the remains to Vhagar. Don’t you ever apologize for being uncomfortable, it is my job as your husband to see to your safety and I take my job very seriously.’ He assured her, kissing her head as they reached their new marital chambers where all of their things had been moved to. As Aemond carried his sister through the door he kicked it shut behind himself and locked it with both locks before using the thick wood plank and barring the door so no one could get in without more work than it was worth.

‘Will you assist me with the dress, husband?’ She teased making Aemond smirk, eyes darkening at the thought of finally undressing the prize he has worked and waited for, for so long.

‘You need not even ask, my love. Come here.’ He quickly unlaced the back of her dress, allowing it to fall to the ground and leave her in her small clothes which she removed before crawling into the bed and looking back up at him nervously. ‘Relax my love, you will love every second of this, I promise you.’ He swore and she took a breath, nodding, though her eyes grew wide again as he removed his trousers and revealed himself to her for the first time, now naked as he crawled onto the bed, leaning down to kiss her, sucking his way down her neck and chest.

‘A-Aemond? What are you-‘

‘Shh…just relax. I’m going to take care of you Princess, just trust me.’ He lifted her leg up by the back of the knee and leaned in, pressing his mouth over her slit before trailing his tongue up between her pussy lips and brushing against her clit, causing her hips to jump against her will.

‘I’m s-sorry-‘

‘Don’t apologize again, just enjoy it.’ Aemond wrapped his lips around her clit, sucking on the little bundle of nerves, brushing his tongue against it repeatedly which seemed to shut her up quickly, the only sound remaining was her never ending moans. He pressed a finger into her tight hole followed by a second one which earned him a soft mewling noise that he couldn’t help thinking was adorable as he began pumping his fingers in and out of her, stretching her as gently as he could to prepare her for him.

‘Oh Fuck! Aemond!’ She seemed to be hanging right on the edge in that moment until he curled his fingers up and just as he did she cried out at a whole new octave and her pussy squeezed his fingers in a vice grip, her body shaking while she panted as if she had run a long distance and he couldn’t help but find her flushed face absolutely beautiful.

‘You are so gorgeous…’ he crawled up over her and touched his lips to hers while spreading her legs. They wrapped around his waist before he pressed his cock against her hole and instantly felt as if he had died and gone to Heaven. 9 years he had waited after realizing how in love with Y/n he truly was, 9 years dreaming of this moment and wanting to make it just as special for her as it was for him just knowing how good his sister would make him feel, and he was right. Her cunt was like the sweetest vice grip he had ever experienced, he had never felt anything more wonderful in his entire life as he stilled his hips and just waited, not wanting to hurt her or cum so fast that she would inevitably laugh at him. ‘Are you alright?’ He questioned, wanting to make sure he wasn’t hurting her too badly but she nodded.

‘I want to see all of you brother…I never want you to hide any part of you from me again.’ She spoke as she reached up and pulled the eye patch from his face. He reflexively turned his head away but she caught him, turning his head back and pulling him down to kiss the scar both over and under his eye. ‘My husband nor my brother will ever have to hide from me, you are so strong…and I think my husband is the most handsome man in the 7 kingdoms. I will fight anyone who chooses to disagree with me…and I have a Dragon so they will most assuredly lose.’ She teased making him smile before he choked on his breath, her pussy squeezing his member suddenly before she wiggled her hips. ‘Take me brother, I am all yours now!’

‘Yes you are…Mine! I will kill anyone who even thinks to disagree with me! All mine…’ Aemond spoke, shifting his hips back before pushing back in gently, doing it again only to thrust up into her this time. ‘Your husband is going to fill your belly so full tonight that no one will be able to question whether or not you are carrying my son. You want that, don’t you Princess? You want me to give you a baby?’

Y/n’s head nodded frantically as Aemond was now jack hammering his hips into her mercilessly, her whines prompting him to go faster. ‘Yes Brother! Yes! I want to give you everything! Fill my womb so that I may give you all the sons you want!’

‘Never going to stop breeding your cunt, Gods you feel magnificent! We’re going to end up having an entire army because I am never going to stop fucking you! Cum for me Princess and your husband will fill your womb, give me your pleasure!’ He demanded just before she cried out, her head thrown back as her cunt clamped down on him so hard he briefly thought it would hurt before the pleasure shot straight up his spine and he buried his cock into her as deeply as he could.

Aemond couldn’t tell how long they laid there breathing heavily and just holding each other, it felt as if they lost time before there was a knock on the door and Y/n flinched, instinctively trying to cover her body with a blanket despite no one entering. ‘My Prince? If you have finished we need-‘

‘Shut Up! Say Another Word and I Will Remove Your Tongue!’ He growled to the maester at the door. ‘Stay still my love, I will take care of it.’ He kissed her head and she smiled, humming contently before wincing as he pulled out of her, using his thumb to press his cum back into her abused hole as it leaked out. Aemond jumped up and pulled the sheet carefully from under her and off of the bed, rolling his eyes as he saw the small amount of blood on the white linen that he had made sure to fuck her on top of as he wasn’t willing to argue about them needing evidence that consummation took place. ‘I will be right back, then you are mine for the next week, because I do not plan on us leaving this bed for at least that long.’ He teased, kissing her nose and making her giggle as he pulled his trousers on and moved to the door, unbarring it and stepping outside while shutting the door behind him, unwilling to let anyone see his wife in her current state. At the door stood Maester Mellos along with his Grandsire, his mother and brother, and also Rhaenyra and Daemon. ‘I do not understand why this needed to be such a spectacle for so many of you but here.’ He shoved the sheet at the old man angrily. ‘Now, all of you will leave because if I find out anyone continued listening at the door I will slit you from balls to brains!’ The maester inspected the sheet before nodding to the Queen who genuinely looked sorry for her son.

‘I didn’t know you had it in you brother!’ Aegon laughed, Otto shoving him away quickly and dragging him down the hall before Aemond could move to cut him open as he wanted to, Daemon following along, clearly not caring about being there and only having done so as he loved his niece- to ensure Aemond was a gentleman.

‘Take care of your wife Aemond, I know you will be a good husband, better than your brother.’

‘Thank you mother-oh! We will be taking all of our meals in our chambers tomorrow-and for the foreseeable future. Please be sure a maid is sent to do that, my wife will need breaks to eat.’ Alicent didn’t look shocked at all, just nodding her head before she walked off.

‘Brother.’ Rhaenyra spoke, Aemond sighing before giving her his attention. ‘Take care of her. She is a gentle soul, if you hurt my sister I will make sure you do not live to see whatever children you give her.’ He rolled his eyes, not giving a fuck about his elder sisters threat.

‘If you think for a moment that I would harm her then you know nothing about our relationship at all-oh! Wait! You don’t…it took 9 years but I always knew that I would make her mine no matter what I had to do. I’m just thankful that father gave into my threat before you could give her away to that idiot Wolf in the North.’

‘W-what are you-‘

‘Of course, you don’t know! I made my mother aware of the fact that if you were successful in marrying off our sister that I would have mounted Vhagar and burned every inch of the Starks home, and every other home and stronghold that had snow covering it. She was never going to marry anyone else, that was decided quite a long time ago…its just that no one but I knew it.’ He explained, enjoying her shocked expression before opening the door to go back to his wife. ‘Oh! One more thing! You should make sure that you keep your eldest on a short leash, because if I find out-or Gods forbid catch him-peeping at my wife like he did under your watch, he will be locked in the Black cells until I decide to feed him to Vhagar. Your heir or not, father will not be able to argue with him dishonoring my wife and his favorite child, and you know it…it was lovely to see you again sister.’ With that Aemond slammed the door in her face and turned back to his wife.

‘Is everything okay?’ Y/n asked, clearly nervous that the sheet wouldn’t be enough evidence and they would demand to watch this time.

‘Of course my Love, I will always ensure that it will be. Now, let us continue enjoying our marital bliss for as long as we can, hmm?’ Y/n smiled, dropping the blankets and revealing her naked chest to his eyes and he couldn’t help but imagine the breasts that he was in love with, swollen with milk to feed the boy that was growing in her womb. He was desperate to taste it himself, his cock growing hard in record time at the thought before he leapt into the bed beside her.

‘I want to stay here with you like this forever.’ She admitted, now sitting in his lap, his cock buried in her pussy as he enjoys worshipping her breasts with his mouth.

‘As you wish Sister…Always.’

Aemond T. Masterlist

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cuteandhughesy · 1 month ago

Text

Baby Please Come Home | Vince Dunn

summary: you've always had a crush on your best friends older brother, even though you're pretty sure he isn't that fond of you. so when your parents flight gets canceled while they're away on vacation, you are graciously invited to spend the christmas holiday with your best friends family - vince and his sour attitude included.

20.5k

a/n: the beginning of cute and hughesy’s christmas special! hope you enjoy the first week 🎄

link to masterlist

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2014: freshman year of highschool

the noises around you are distracting - a mixture of loud laughter and singing, combined with the bass riddled music vibrating through your bones on top of the various conversations happening around you.

you eye the mingling crowd around you, watching as teenagers older than you easily chat to one another. they don't look worried or anxious - they look nothing like you're feeling.

"I didn't think they still played games like this in highschool." you best friend sammy says into your ear, her tone hushed as to not attract attention to either of you.

"me either." you admit gently. "but clearly they do."

she huffs, crossing her arms over her red top. sammy has been your best friend since the first grade when her mom and dad moved their family down the street from yours. obviously you both attended the same small town school, and since then you two have been inseparable.

sammy has always been the type of girl that everyone loves. she's the sweetest soul you've ever known, but she's not afraid to stand up for herself and tell somebody off if they need to hear it. not only does she have the most amazing personality, but she's ungodly beautiful. with her thick and shiny dark hair, as well as her naturally tinted lips, and long lashes framing her large, green eyes - she's ethereal.

ever since the two of you started your freshman year of high school four short months ago, she has been getting lots of attention, especially from the senior boys. to be ultra specific, the high school hockey team in particular was the most fond of sammy - regardless of how she was related to the assistant captain.

much to sammy's older brother vince's dismay, the hockey team had invited sammy to this party that the two of you were currently at. you weren't technically extended an invitation, but sammy would've never gone to her first high school party without you - so here you both are.

you don't know what you were expecting at a high school party. sure, the alcohol and weed was something that was a given, but sitting on the floor with various hockey players and senior girls while you all took turns spinning a bottle - well that was surprising.

the game of spin the bottle happening in front of you was definitely the cause of your growing nerves. because not only did you have to spin the bottle and kiss whoever it landed on - but you and sammy were informed you'd be spending '7 minutes in heaven' with said person, where the kiss would actually take place, rather than infront of everyone.

so that had your nerves dampening slightly - but the kissing part of it all was still having you feeling anxious - the mere fact that you haven't had your first kiss yet was the main contributor.

"do you think jake and I will end up in the closet?" sammy giggles softly, her eyes drifting to the other side of the circle where jake matthews is chatting with vince, leisurely sipping his beer - paying no mind to the game happening right in front of him.

you shrug, your eyes also trained in their direction. "well if he spins and It lands of you - those are the rules right?"

sammy then starts to get giddy like she usually does when thinking and talking about jake matthews and she immediately starts whispering to you about how he's her future husband and how much she's in love with him.

at the same time, as if he can feel your stare from the other side of the circle, vince's eyes flicker to yours. thankfully his conversation with jake doesn't stop because jake is the one who's doing most of the talking, so nobody takes notice to the way vince is looking at you.

sammy's words are falling on deaf ears unbeknownst to her - the gaze you are locked in with her brother has completely captivated your attention.

like usual vince doesn't smile or acknowledge you in any way, he just keeps his eyes on you, almost as if he was assessing you through the strangers dimly lit living room.

you squint at him accusingly - as if to ask what's his deal. you're not expecting any type of response because you've never gotten one from vince in regards to his grumpy persona - the grumpy persona he seems to only have around you.

"are you listening?" sammy elbows you in the side. your black knitted sweater provides no cushion as her elbow smacks against your ribs, and it effectively has you breaking eye contact with vince.

"what?" you hiss, rubbing your side.

"it's your turn." sammy's eyes widen and her gaze frantically switches between you and the empty beer bottle sitting in the middle of the carpet.

you can feel your face pale and heat up all at the same time. it shouldn't be as big of a deal as you feel it is - but you can't help your mind and heart from racing, your blood pumping loudly through your ears.

almost everyone in the circle was looking in your direction, waiting for you to take your turn.

"right." clearing your throat, you push up off your butt and do an awkward crawl combined with a reach to grab ahold of the empty bottle.

you give it a good spin, watching it swivel with momentum on top of the fuzzy textured rug. you move back into your seated position, not once taking your eyes of the direction of the spinning glass.

it slows and only makes it around one more complete circle before stopping. when sammy gasps quietly and the group all wolf whistles around you, your nerves max out. you don't want to look up and find who your spin has landed on - you're scared to see who it landed on and the reaction around you wasn't helping.

reluctantly you follow the direction of the bottles neck, looking upwards until you are met with the familiar green eyed gaze of your best friends older brother.

your face falls in shock - mimicking the expression on vince's face who too looks very unimpressed with the outcome of your bottle spin.

you attempt to spin again, asking if it was possible with these seemingly strict rules set by the hockey team - but no. much to your and vince's dismay nothing works and you're both ushered into one of the empty bedrooms for your required '7 minutes in heaven.'

the door clicks shut behind you, and your nerves have you feeling slightly wobbly and lightheaded. this wasn't the situation you were expecting tonight and you certainly weren't prepared to spend 7 minutes in heaven with your best friends older brother.

but vince doesn't seem to be too bothered with the situation now that he's in the room, his earlier shocked expression faded away. vince sits down before he flips backwards onto the perfectly made bed, closing his eyes and loudly exhaling.

you knaw on your lip, trying to think of something to say. he's clearly annoyed with this whole situation, because he seems to always be annoyed with you - you swear you could polish his shoes and cook him his favourite meal and he'd still give you that dead stare.

in a desperate attempt to try and ease the thick tension that's everlasting between you (even though you've never had a clue as to why), you move towards vince and nudge your foot against his.

one eye opens as he peeks up at you, a questioning raise to his eyebrow. he doesn't say anything, and he doesn't move - his foot still touching yours.

"i'm sorry," you start, "I should've tried harder to convince everyone to let me spin again. i've never been to a party before though and I didn't want to upset anyone - especially because I wasn't technically invited and only came because sammy wanted me to."

vince still doesn't say anything. he pushes up with his elbows, back into his original sitting position at the end of the bed. he looks up at you blankly, and like usual he's not giving away any of his emotions.

the position has you feeling awkward - you looking down at vince while he silently and lazily blinks up at you. you wring your hands out and take a seat beside him, the mattress dipping until you're sliding into his torso.

your nervous ramble continues. "although maybe I should be happy the bottle landed on you instead of some other asshole who probably would've started groping me by now - like how embarrassing would it have been turning down evan russell because I haven't even had my first kiss yet, never mind hooking up-"

"you've never been kissed?" vince interrupts you.

you heat up, a bright pink hue covering your cheeks and up to the tips of your jewelry decorated ears. "no...and obviously these lips won't be touching evan russell's anytime soon. at least not until I can properly and confidently go into a situation like this-" you gesture between the two of you wildly "-without my stomach falling down to my feet."

vince hums quietly to himself, and his eyes dance over your face slowly - analyzing you. "you talk way too much."

your head snaps completely over in his direction, and your eyebrows pull together in irritation. "excuse you. I don't talk too much, what are you even saying right now-"

vince kisses you.

he confidently pulls you closer towards him with a guiding hand on the back of your neck, his fingers sliding through your hair in a way that gives you goosebumps. his lips are soft and taste like cheap beer, but the way he licks onto your bottom lip expertly has you completely captivated and not even the reality of the situation could snap you out of it.

vince kisses softer than you expected - a complete contrast to his hard exterior. the way his lips move against yours is almost comforting and relaxing and although you have absolutely nothing to compare it to - it feels good.

you breathe shakily against him, the unexpected pleasure from a simple kiss taking you by surprise.

the door opens and you both jump apart. vince immediately gets off the bed and walks out the room, brushing past a few of the guys from the hockey team - mumbling something to them you don't catch. vince doesn't spare you a second glance as he leaves, and that has you feeling very uncertain and confused.

you get up, ignoring the guys snickering and eyes as you walk down the hallway and back into the main area of the house. even though you'd technically been caught making out with vince, nobody had seemingly saw anything that proves it and by the bored look on everyone's faces from sitting through another 7 minutes of waiting around, they don't suspect anything.

you return to the circle, taking your original seat beside sammy, she instantly turns to you with her eyes blow wide. "are you okay? did anything happen?"

you can only pray your best friend doesn't notice your rose tinted cheeks or puffy lips - incriminating evidence that contradicts your shaking head. "no. nothing happened."

sammy laughs with relief for you. "thank god - my brother is so disgusting."

"yeah." you laugh softly.

the rest of the night, vince doesn't meet your gaze.

it has you feeling very icky and....confused. is this a usual occurrence after making out with somebody you've known your whole life? was vince kissing and not following up with any sort of interaction a normal thing for him?

so hours later, way after vince's mom had picked you all up from the party and brought you back to the dunn house (vince had hockey practice early, of course), you were determined to figure out what the hell happened in that bedroom and what it meant.

getting out of the creaky bed, you sneak out of sammy's room, leaving her and her loud snoring behind in favour of quietly making your way down the upstairs hallways - down towards closed door of vince's bedroom.

you knock once - quietly - on his door, praying that he's not yet gone to sleep and he heard your knock.

thankfully, vince answers. the door opens just a crack, his brows pulled together in confusion as he catches sight of your familiar stature through the gap - his face falls.

he pulls open the door fully, revealing his shirtless torso and pyjama pants that sat dangerously low on his chiseled hips. momentarily you're distracted. you can't help it - your teenage hormones are out of whack after that toe curling first kiss.

"what?" he huffs, crossing his arms.

you mimic his actions subconsciously. "are you going to talk to me after that?"

his brows raise questionably. "after....?"

"after you kissed me, vince."

he hums. "right, the kiss - why would I want to talk about it?"

you shrug, exasperated. "maybe because you and I have never done that before - I've never done that before."

"and?" he's looking at you expectantly.

"and," you huff, "I don't know what it means."

his face changes into something you can't decipher - maybe guilt, or possibly anger. it could even be a new version of his usual bored expression - you're not sure. vince exhales, and his arms uncross in favour of running a hand through his messy curly hair.

he meets your unsure eyes. "it means nothing, y/n. you're my little sisters best friend, okay? nothing will ever happen between us. and I know it was your first kiss or whatever, but it wasn't mine. I only kissed you so you'd stop talking, so don't be weird or annoying about it 'cause it's going to piss me off."

vince's words have you taking a visible step back, your face pulling uncomfortably as embarrassment crawls up your chest.

even though vince has never been your biggest fan, you've always liked him. there was something about vince that always has you feeling drawn in, and you always find yourself spotting him in a crowd or looking for him in a room full of others.

he was your first real crush and ever since you met him back when you were 8 and vince was turning 11, you've found yourself completely smitten with him - regardless of his grumpy and rude attitude directed towards you.

so hearing those words hurt. because after the kiss - a kiss that he initiated- you thought there could've been a small possibility that he changed his opinion of you...that he liked you back.

but clearly not.

"it doesn't matter what I do because it will piss you off regardless." you spit out, looking at him with a completely different view than you ever have before.

all vince does is roll his eyes - and that is the final nail in your coffin.

you should've given up on trying to crack vince dunn a long time ago, but the way he turned such an amazing first experience for you into a heartbreaking story is something you'll never forget- vince will forever be apart of you, no matter how badly you try to change it.

"are you done throwing a hissy fit now? i'm tired."

"yeah," you send him a sarcastic smile, the anger towards him and the situation practically vibrating off you, "i'm done."

you walk away, back down the hall in the direction of sammy's room. from this day forward, you vow to yourself to never treat vince with any less disrespect than he shows you.

you will never like vince dunn again.

christmas: 2024, december 21st

"are you guys serious right now?"

"yes honey, there's nothing we can do." your moms burnt skin is practically blinding you through the facetime video, and you can hear her beaded braids clicking against one another as he peeks over your dads shoulder.

through the phone, your dad sends you a guilty look. "because of the island's location, they only have flights once a week and due to the storm down here all flights have been cancelled for today and won’t make it out until next week."

you make a disgruntled noise, "but that will be after christmas. so i'm just supposed to spend christmas alone? - my first christmas since evan dumped me, let's not forget that mom and dad."

"i'm sorry dolly," your mom pouts, "we are upset about it too."

"yeah well at least you get to be together and spend time on a tropical island. i'm stuck in a constant freezing temperature by myself."

"don't make us feel bad honey." your dad scolds gently. it's a reminder that it's not your parents fault for their flight getting cancelled regardless of how upset you are.

you're still a little salty towards them for not bringing you on their vacation so close to christmas though, so you're allowed to feel a little annoyed.

you sigh gently, "I know i'm sorry, this just sucks." your eyes drift past your phone, finding the twinkling lights of your childhood christmas tree. your mom insists on having all the shitty ornaments you made when you were a kid still on the tree, accompanied by twinkling red and green lights that she's had since before you were born. the angel on top is missing a wing and the tree skirt is ripped but you wouldn't change it for the world.

another wave of sadness hits you as the reality sets in - you're about to be alone on christmas.

"I know - ah crap my phones about to die." your dad curses, and through the screen you watch him attempting to get rid of the low battery notification.

your mom rolls her eyes at your dads antics before she looks back at you through your phone. "we love you honey, we're sorry."

"I love you guys too."

"keep in touch, okay."

you give your parents a small smile, resting your cheek against your palm. "I will."

your parents hang up - you're not sure if it was them pressing the button or if your dads phone died, but your screen returns to normal as your mom and dads faces disappear.

you sigh gently. the house feels more empty than it did when you answered the call, knowing that you'll now be alone in it until after the holiday season is just...depressing. if this was any other year you would've invited your boyfriend over for the holiday, or perhaps you would've stayed with him and his family - but evan russell broke up with you four months ago after your college graduation.

dating one of the guys on the senior boys hockey team in high school was one of those things you weren't expecting to happen, but it just weirdly did and it worked. you two started seeing one another not long after that party where you and vince kissed - which still sends your blood boiling, by the way. evan has asked you out one day after class, and dating one of his friends pissed vince off even more.

you and evan dated for years - all through high school and college. but two weeks after your graduation, he called it off and said he needed to explore being himself and wished you well. although the breakup hurt and felt very unexpected, you respected evan and wanted what was best for him. that was until a week after the breakup you saw him posting pictures with his new girlfriend - and the respect vanished.

you open your text thread with sammy and click on the camera icon. you take a picture of yourself pouting in front of the christmas tree, looking very alone and very sad in your elf pyjamas.

y/n

these are my new christmas plans

sammy

what? wearing pyjamas still at 3 in the afternoon ?

y/n

no.

y/n

being alone on christmas. my parents flight got canceled and because the island is super remote they can't get another flight in until boxing day

y/n

so leave me and my christmas jammys alone

sammy

I love your jammys

sammy

but WHAT omg - you're not spending christmas alone

y/n

nothing I can do about it sammy

immediately after she reads the text, you get an incoming facetime call from sammy - the picture of her when she was 15 with spaghetti sauce all over her face you saved as her contact photo flashing on the screen.

you slide the answer bar, already expecting the brazen look she'll be sporting. but oddly enough, she's got an unsettling smirk on her face and you're immediately groaning. "why are you looking like you're planning on kidnapping me?"

"because I'm going to kidnap you," sammy laughs, and through the camera you watch as she sits up into a more straight position on the family couch. "mom says get over here."

just then tracy dunn pops over her daughters shoulder. she's got her apron on and you can spot the explosions of flour on the christmas cover up - she's clearly been starting early on her holiday baking. tracy gives you a stern look, "y/n honey you're not spending christmas alone - especially when you have family right here in this house. pack a bag and one of us will come get you."

in your junior year of high school sammy and the dunn family moved. thankfully, they stayed in your small southern ontario town, but instead of living two houses down from you and your family, they became a twenty minute drive away.

the garland in the doorway above sammy's head twinkles, and another pang of christmas blues hits you. a warm and inviting home with some of your favourite people was something you definitely couldn't pass up.

you eye sammy and her mom and a smile begins to grow at your lips. "okay, I'll put some stuff together for a few days."

"you're staying until your parents get back - sammy said boxing day, right?"

sammy's such a little snitch, you think. to prove your point, your best friend sends you a triumphant smile through the phone.

"yes but I don't want to oppose-"

"that's ridiculous," tracy interrupts, "you could never. sammy hang up the phone and stop distracting her, she needs to pack."

"alright." sammy moves the phone so that only she's in view, that cheeky smile still on her face. "you better go."

you nod, "if you think i'm changing out of these pyjamas though you'd be wrong."

she laughs, "i'll see you soon."

"see you soon, sammy."

she hangs up and you're immediately pushing off the couch. you pack your things as quickly as you can, gathering a weeks worth of clothes, toiletries and your favourite one direction pillow - you figure if you forget anything you can just steal sammy's.

just as you've double checked everything unnecessary is unplugged from any of the outlets, a horn honks outside - two quick beeps that alert you. you peek out the front window and see sammy's blue toyota idling in your driveway.

you grab your bag, pillow and your house keys before slipping on your winter gear over your movie themed pyjamas - the bottoms bulking up around your boots in a way that makes you look wildly non put together.

you walk wearily through the icy snow coating your driveway. you've never been good at removing snow, and you honestly should've left it and not attempted to shovel the driveway - because now you're walking on uneven, slippery, half completed snow piles.

you get in the car quickly, rubbing your hands together to create some friction - attempting to warm up your already freezing fingers. you pause to shut the car door, as well as buckle your seat belt over your puffy jacket.

the car is pulling out of your driveway before you can even fathom your surroundings. sammy has always been a nervous driver, especially in the winter, so her speedy take off has you frowning in confusion.

as you finally look towards the driver's side of the car, your face falls and suddenly the driving style makes sense.

vince eyes you quickly before finding the snow covered street again. "nice pyjamas."

"what are you doing here?"

"what am I doing here?" he repeats your question with a stupid smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, and he uses one hand to turn onto the main road. "i'm picking you up."

"no I mean what are you doing back home?"

vince shoots you an inquisitive glance. "you kind of just answered the question - it's my home."

"no," you correct, "seattle is your home."

"you keeping tabs on me, y/n?" he's clearly trying to get a rise out of you and you know him too well for that tone to fly under your radar. since that dreaded kiss between you both in high school, vince's attitude towards you changed - well, sort of. instead of the quite and bored attitude vince had for you, it has turned into something more mocking and insulting where he seemed to go out of his way to annoy you and push your buttons.

but you vowed to not give him the satisfaction of your ignorance and just ignore him - absolutely not. so you made sure you were just as petty and reciprocated every comment, action and insult. "I don't have to keep tabs on you to know you've been in seattle for a few years vincent - did you get injured again? is that why you're here?"

he tongues his cheek, rolling his eyes at your jab. "no, my schedule worked out so I can be home until boxing day."

your eyes widen, "so you'll be here the entire week?"

"don't sound too excited." vince breathes out a laugh, eyes flickering to yours again. "or I'll start to think you like my company."

"like is a very strong word." you sigh irritatedly and cross your arms. your coat makes that awkward friction noise, and all that does is further your annoyance. you turn your head to watch through the window - the sights of snow covered branches glistening in the sun, combined with the glowing lights of christmas light up the dimming sky.

you hear vince move after he makes the turn off the highway, and the sound of some shitty country song gets louder over the cars speakers. vince has always loved country, which has obviously ruined any kind of country song for you - you pray for a day when you can listen to old taylor swift without thinking of vince dunn.

the loud music has you huffing and you break your silent treatment in favour of turning down the radio - blanketing the inside of the toyota in silence.

vince shoots you an unamused look and before he has a chance to speak, or worse, turn the song back on, you interrupt him. "it's christmas, at least play something festive if I have to be trapped in this car with you for another 10 minutes."

"by all means, go ahead and get out of the car. i'll even slow down a bit so you don't hurt yourself too bad jumping out." he gestures to the car door beside you, his eyes darting quickly between you, the road, and the door.

"oh wow and here I thought you enjoyed being in here with me - I'm hurt, vincent, really." you hold your heart for a petty affect, pouting sarcastically over at him.

he laughs, a deep grumbling noise that has your smile faltering slightly. "oh please it's not like i'm here voluntarily-"

"that's a big word - who taught you that one?" you interrupt him, furthering your closed off position by crossing your pyjama covered legs. you merely miss the dial on the radio with your foot, and your anklet slides up your calf awkwardly.

the new position has your pant leg shifting so your leg is somewhat exposed. you feel momentarily embarrassed at the sight of your pale and prickly leg and instantly have the urge to change your seating position. but you don't, because you don't want vince to think you're uncomfortable- you can't give him that sort of satisfaction.

"nobody else could pick you up. that's why I'm here." vince continues right from where he left off, before you interrupted him about his 5th grade vocabulary.

you had already assumed that was the reason for vince's suprise arrival. with tracy always elbow deep in baking this time of year, john working the late shift this week and sammy's hectic winter driving - vince was the only option (even though you didn't know he was an option until he showed up - you figured he'd be in seattle like every other year).

"well If I knew that I would've stayed home." you huff.

vince eyes your boot covered foot as you anxiously shake it - with every jump it almost hits the volume dial. he mimics your deep sigh and rolls his eyes. "I wish you would've."

you don't say anything and keep your eyes trained through the front windshield. as dinner time approaches, the streets are starting to become enveloped in darkness, leaving you with that blue christmas light longing.

you can feel vince's gaze switching between the side of your face and the road, and you know it's only a matter of seconds before he spews some more nonsense that will leave you wanting to actually throw yourself out the car.

like predicted, vince starts to speak again, his unfortunately familiar voice filling the quiet rumble in the car. "how come you're not spending christmas with evan anyways? I saw that he was back home."

your head snaps in vince's direction so quickly you think there's a high possibility you've given yourself whiplash. you attempt to read his expression- trying to figure out if he was egging you on with bringing up your failed relationship or if he actually didn't know.

you decide it's the latter based on the way vince isn't even looking at you while he waits for a response, and his eyebrows are pulled together as he focuses on driving through the deep snow - he’s not watching you for a reaction.

you clear your throat quietly and look back to the road. "spending the holidays with my ex and his new girlfriend would've been a bit awkward, don't you think?"

he looks at you quickly, an unreadable expression on his flushed face . "I didn't know."

"why would you know? it's not like you would've asked about me for anything besides trying to benefit yourself."

you don't give him the opportunity to say anything else and you reach over yourself to turn the volume back up. to your surprise, vince has christmas music in his playlist and the familiar melody of michael buble fills the car.

the rest of the car ride neither you or vince say anything and choose to stew in the slightly awkward silence - the awkwardness being from the bombshell you've just dropped that you're no longer dating his friend from high school. thankfully he doesn't turn off the music like you'd done to him earlier, and the songs provide a comfortable white noise over everything else.

once vince pulls the car into his families driveway, you're immediately jumping out, grabbing your bag and pillow you'd left at your feet and booking it up the small set of stairs and into the cinnamon scented home.

you spot sammy who is still lounging in the same spot that she was in when you answered her call 30 minutes ago.

she meets your eyes and sends you a mix of a guilty and sympathetic smile, as if she was apologizing for the pain she knew you would've endured with vince picking you up without warning.

"you dick." you huff towards her. "no warning or anything?" your words have no bite as you're plopping yourself between the back of the couch cushions and sammy, cuddling into your best friends side.

she laughs, "If I told you, you wouldn't of gotten in the car."

you shrug. "would that have been so bad?"

sammy scoffs, "yes because we need you here with us for christmas."

you emit a grumbling noise and tuck your face further into your best friends side. sammy laughs again, patting your head sympathetically.

sammy has never been bothered by your ongoing battle with her older brother. in the beginning, she was just as confused as you were about his seemingly unwarranted negative attitude and sammy would often try and change his mind about you. but as the years went on and you and vince got more heated, she just accepted the fate and chose to be blissfully ignorant towards any negative situation or argument that brews between you.

vince walks through the front door with you purse clutched in his hands - you must've forgotten it in your rush to leave the tension stewing in the car.

he shoots you an unimpressed look and tosses the bag near your outstretched socked feet. you have the tiniest urge to pick up your purse and throw it back right in his face, but your contemplation is halted as tracy enters the warmly lit living room, a matching smile on her face.

"you guys hungry?"

you look away from vince and his condescending smirk - like he could read your thoughts - and force a smile.

"starving." sammy jumps away from you and off the couch, her sock feet bounding around the corner and down towards the kitchen nook.

your cheek hits the cushion, smooshing your face into the fabricated sofa. vince snickers from where he's lounging on the lazy boy, and you're pretty sure his snickering is directed at you and your awkward pose.

you sigh, pushing off the couch with the palms of your hands until you can manoeuvre back onto your feet. you tug down the hem of your pyjamas top, pulling it back into a more appropriate position from where it had risen up.

you follow in your friends footsteps and make the short journey down the wide hallway until you reach the large archway entrance of the cosy kitchen. the sight before you is memorizing, and you pause to look around. tracy had completely decorated the kitchen for the holidays - faux trees and garland lining the countertops, along with red plaid hand towels and table cloth. ribbons, dried orange garland, and the scent of gingerbread are all apart of making the kitchen feel like the warmest, comforting, festive space.

"looks amazing tracy." you say, your eyes still walking throughout the room. "like seriously."

tracy smiles, adding another platter to the just as festive kitchen table - it looks like perfectly crispy bite sized potatoes and your mouth is already watering. since you're parents have been gone on vacation you've only been eating take out or frozen meals. you've never been a good cook - one time in college you almost set your microwave ablaze trying to heat up some pizza...you still don't know how that happened.

you hear vince's footsteps approaching behind you. he must've not been paying attention, because he runs right into the back of you, sending you stumbling a few steps forward.

you spin to face him, already feeling the irritated pull on your face.

vince huffs like you're the one who ran into him - which makes you want to knee him - and pockets his phone. clearly, you were right and he wasn't looking where he was going.

"vince," sammy's teasing voice calls from the stove, where she is dipping her fingers into the squash soup and sucking the creamy vegetable liquid off them. "better get out from underneath the mistletoe or else you'll have to kiss her."

her eyes gesture between her brother and you.

much to your dismay, there is some mistletoe delicately hung onto the archway above vince.

vince raises his eyebrow in question, but his face stays flat, not giving away any thoughts or emotions.

you turn away and finally walk further into the kitchen, immediately offering help to tracy with setting the table. after all, it's the least you could do after she invited you to stay with her and her family until christmas- plus it's gets you away from vince and his punchable face.

john gets home a few minutes later, greeting you all warmly. he doesn't even seem shocked by your presence in his home, and when you tell him you'll be staying for a few days - he's not at all fazed.

thankfully dinner doesn't leave space for you and vince to get into any type of tiff. you're too busy catching up with the rest of the dunn family to even look in vince's direction, which means you remain with an appetite for the entirety of dinner.

"oh!" tracy exclaims, jumping off her chair to gather a small jar set aside on the counter. it's ceramic and red, shaped like a gift. "I almost forgot, we have to pull the names for secret santa - and y/n honey don't worry i've slipped your name in here."

"oh, you didn't need to do that." you breathe, watching tracy take off the lid of the jar.

she dismisses you with a wave of her hand like she always does - a true mother like fashion. tracy makes her husband go first, and john digs around the pieces of paper for a few seconds for dramatic affect - tracy tuts her tongue at his antics.

john emerges with one slip, taking a sneaky peek at the name he pulled out. he groans playfully, thumping his palm against his forehead jokingly. it makes you and everyone else laugh, which was obviously johns goal because he snaps out of character to join in.

soon enough it's your turn and you take one of the only remaining pieces of paper. nobody has pulled their own name yet, so you're praying you keep that streak going so it doesn't have to start all over again.

you pull sammy - her full name written in bold black ink across the rectangle piece of paper. you celebrate internally, always happy to buy things for your best friend.

vince goes next, and he reaches into the almost empty present shaped jar. from your turn you know there's only one remaining name to be picked, so there's no shuffling around for the name. vince pulls out and reads his name. immediately his eyes flicker towards his sister.

sammy gasps, pointing to him like she has it all figured out. "you so have me."

tracy scolds her, "don't guess samatha, you're going to ruin it."

"he looked at me," sammy defends herself, "not my fault he can't keep a secret."

vince smirks, "you're so easily gullible."

"enough you two." tracy scolds gently, looking between her two children quickly. "or i'll make you pick new names."

you know for a fact that vince didn't pull sammy's name because you did, so you're a bit confused at what's he's trying to accomplish here. if you try and think of an answer you'll just be more annoyed with vince, so you you disregard his behaviour.

you tuck the slip of paper between your phone and the case, keeping it close and away from samantha nosy and wondering eyes.

soon enough you're all getting ready for bed, and even though there's one bathroom upstairs between vince and sammy - you thankfully don't run into him while brushing your teeth or washing your face.

you slip into bed beside sammy who's already snoring away - you swear she's the heaviest sleeper who will always fall asleep immediately- and turn off her beside lamp.

being in this house is so comforting and familiar and it's soothing the longing ache you'd felt earlier when your parents broke the news to you regarding not coming home for christmas. you're so thankful for your best friend and her parents for immediately offering you a seat in their home for the holidays - especially considering holiday was time reserved for family.

the only thing that keeps you from falling into a quick sleep was the lingering thought of vince. you can't stop replaying your conversations from today and all his snarky, petty comments and arguments and the way he looks down at you as if you were nothing to him.

you think you'll continue to try and keep yourself in control and try your absolute hardest in not letting your irritation get the better of you and lash out at vince - especially infront of tracy and john. you don't think they'll appreciate you and their son arguing after they invited you into their home.

december 22nd

the dunn's have always had a real christmas tree. when you were younger you used to beg your parents to get rid of the plastic one they'd had for 20 years and to take you to a christmas tree farm and pick out a real one.

but you never got one because your parents didn't want to deal with the mess, so you lived vicariously through sammy and her families real tree. sure, it was messy and you had to take care of it, but the smell of fresh pine made it all worth it.

yesterday when you arrived at the house you were too overwhelmed with the news about your parents and vince's suprise arrival you didn't notice the lack of that christmas tree smell you’d grown so accustomed to.

"well, we had to wait for vince to get home. once he told us he was going to be here for a few days, I thought it be better to wait and that way it would be like when you were both little - when we'd pick out a tree together." tracy smiles warmly, her hand clutched to her chest as she reminisced when her kids were younger, running through the tree farms.

"you're insane, mom." sammy says with a mouthful of milky cheerios - red and geeen coloured for the holidays.

"not insane," tracy squeaks, "just feeling sentimental that my babies are all grown up." she wraps her daughter in a hug over the kitchen chair, almost smacking sammy in the jaw in the process.

you smile, glancing over your shoulder at them. sammy is wide eyed, staring at you in a silent way of asking for help - you giggle gently as tracy starts to rock her back and forth. your attention is brought back to the toaster as you patiently wait for your waffles to pop.

"go hug your other baby, he's the one who's never home." sammy grumbles, scooping another spoonful of cereal into her mouth.

"where is vince anyways, we have to leave soon - vince, honey come downstairs!" tracy shouts out, her voice echoing out through the kitchen and up the stairs.

the thought of the oldest dunn sibling has your face pulling in disgust, and the idea of spending more time with him is already having you feeling worn out before the day has started. thankfully, your waffles pop and you concentrate on transferring them to your plate without burning yourself, rather than vince and his stupid face.

vince rounds the corner into the kitchen and surprisingly he's not in his pyjamas still - he’s wearing some nice light wash jeans and a black hoodie, which isn't very festive compared to your leggings and red reindeer printed sweater. thankfully tracy is matching your holiday spirit, and her sweater has a big gold bow on the front that shimmers in the sun - so at least you’re not the only one looking extra.

"honey, we are leaving soon. have you eaten?" tracy asks her son. she's currently packing her purse for all the things she thinks she'll need for the day, which you're not sure how a beatles cd will come in handy - but who knows. you are thankful for the extra socks though, because the chances of you shoving vince into a snow pile are very high.

"I'll have an apple." vince says.

you finish spreading the butter over the ridges of the waffles, the solid topping turning into a delicious liquid pool in each square of the waffle. you open the cupboard above your head where the syrup is kept (because who likes cold syrup?) but it's not on the reachable shelf it usually sits - it's on the very top shelf.

at first you don't think it'll be a challenge, you're not short by any means, but as you first attempt to reach the syrup, you come up short and you can't quite reach the bottle. you huff, pushing up on to your tiptoes to try and get ahold of the syrup- but somebody beats you to it.

vince is chewing the contents of his apple completely unfazed as he comes up beside you and grabs the syrup bottle. he places it beside your plate of waffles, and you have to take a deep breathe and tune out the sound of him crunching on the apple or you may just loose it.

you eye him, "I could've gotten it."

vince’s eyebrows raise and he swallows the chunk of apple. "oh well I can put it back up there and you can try and grab it. I found it quite amusing to watch you struggle."

"but yet you helped me?"

"thought Id try and spread some christmas cheer." vince shrugs and takes the last editable bite out of his apple, now left with only the browning core. instead of walking around to the garbage can sitting on the other side of you, vince tosses the core of his apple between you and the counter.

it merely misses you and getting sticky apple juice on your festive sweater, landing in the bottom of the garbage can with a loud smack.

you inhale loudly, shooting vince another pointed look. "could start by not attempting to hit me with something covered in your saliva."

vince smirks, crossing his arms. even his bulky hoodie can't hide the thick muscles he's maintained through the season, and you catch yourself staring. "you're the only girl I know who would protest that."

you make a gagging noise, turning you attention back to your waffle - which you haven't even attempted to dress with syrup yet.

john then walks into the kitchen, clad in his winter coat and boots. "the car is brushed off and the christmas tree farm is calling our names." he claps his hands together once, rubbing them together in anticipation. "everyone excited?"

tracy immediately answers her husband yes - just as cheerful as she's been all morning. sammy immediately drops her bowl in the sink, still full of milk, and runs off as she shouts something about needing to find the perfect coat for the farm.

amongst the slight chaos, vince turns to his father and grins suspiciously large. it already has your stomach bubbling with irritation, continuing to dread the day ahead. "so excited." vince expresses.

as his dad and mom start going over their mental check list for the day, vince looks back towards you - his vision pointed and teasing.

you only hold his gaze for a few antagonizing seconds before tearing your eyes away. the way vince can so easily irritate you, and know exactly what he’s doing is so frustrating to watch. you try and mask the scowl growing on your face by taking an angry bite of your syrupless waffle.

——

"vincent i'm one second away from shoving your head into the snow." you huff, sending him a pointed look over the puffed shoulder of your coat.

"do it," vince snickers, "because then I don't have to hear your voice anymore."

you grumble his words under your breath, deeply mocking him. vince doesn't seem to hear you though because he doesn't mumble anything back in retaliation. the silence gives you a moment of peace, saved from the tangent vince had just gone on - arguing with you about the height of the tree his mom wanted (it’s 7ft ceilings - there’s no argument.)

the smell of fresh pine trees and sticky sap is the only thing keeping you sane - truly. without the scent and christmas festivities all around you, you surely would've slammed your head in the door of john and tracy's minivan by now.

after a good half hour drive to the christmas tree farm and trying to not react to vince's overly expressive comments on the way, you figured you'd be free of the oldest dunn sibling for the next couple hours - but no.

sammy's boyfriend, logan, ended up showing up and sammy was quick to totally abandon you in order to spend time with him. which you don't resent her for obviously - she never really gets to see him since he's still away at college, but without sammy as your tree picking partner, you're left with vince.

obviously this is your worst nightmare.

vince follows a few steps behind you with his hands shoved in his front jean pockets. he doesn't seem to even be looking at the trees, which only irritates you further - because why was he so adamant about arguing with you about the height of a tree if he wasn’t even going to properly look for one.

you weave through another row of trees, slowing in your steps to look over each one - inspecting every pine and bristle. because it's so close to christmas the supply at the farm is slowly dwindling, and although all rows have trees, it's looking a little sparse - the amount and the trees themselves.

you let your previously crossed arms fall, and you complete stop your steady pace. the tree in front of you looks pretty good considering the options available, with almost perfectly green bristles and that full look tracy loved so much. you eye back at vince, a questioning raise to your eyebrows. "here's a good one."

his brows pull together tightly, forming a v shape above the bridge of his noise. vince takes a step closer to the tree you’re stopped at, and after a long silent moment he just shrugs.

"what's wrong with this tree?" you huff pointedly.

"it's shit."

"it's not shit - you don't like it because I picked it and you know it's the best one we've seen so far and there's a high chance it's the best one period."

your attitude is on full display, with your hand resting on your hip as the bone juts out towards the left. your face is pulled in a mixture of confusion and frustration, blinking quickly up at vince like you're trying to literally blink him away.

it has vince biting back a satisfied smirk - he's always so amused at how easily he can rile you up, even when you try so hard to hide it. "I bet I can find a better one."

"it's four days before christmas vincent, you're not going to find a better one." you grab ahold of the rope holding the tree and follow the natural line around to the backboard behind the trees. it's hooked into some weird latch, and you quickly try and maneuver the metal clasp off the loop - desperate to get the tree and get out of there.

"you have to push before you pull." vince is much closer than before, and he reaches towards the clasp as well. his words are warm against your frost bitten face, and the press of his body against your side is an oddly chilling feeling - underneath your clothes, your skin prickles with goosebumps.

"yeah that's what i'm trying to do - but now your hands are in my way."

he huffs, "you're only pulling - I can feel it, y/n."

"I can only pull because you're not letting me push." you argue. you both don't let up, and there's a confused mix of hands trying to pick over and around one another in a competitive match to unlatch the rope from the hook on the wooden plaque.

it’s only a few more moments of battling one another before vince's uses his strength advantage to forcefully move you out of the way and pushes your body off to the side with just his hip. your hands release the hook reluctantly, which gives vince free will to fiddle with it solely.

in a surge of anger, from not only his ridiculous strength but also your lack of, you kneel down and grab a pile of fluffy snow from the base of the cut tree stumps. you quickly and messily pack it into a ball shape and before you can think otherwise, you chuck it right at vince.

it hits him square in the chest, and the snow explodes from the impact, coming up his coat and splashing against his jawline - some of the snow even slipping past the neck hole of his sweatshirt and soaking his shirt.

slowly, he looks in your direction - his face pulled in such a way that you can't tell if he's going to scream or say nothing at all. vince is met with only the sight of your wide, shocked eyes - mitten covered hands covering your grinning mouth.

"I don't know why I did that." your words are quick and muffled through the pink gloves.

vince eyes squint accusingly as he fully turns to face you. he lets go of the hold on the lock that was still very much clasped in - but he is too shocked to even begin brushing snow off himself. "are you laughing?"

you are giggling - just a tiny bit and clearly your hands aren't doing a good job at hiding it. "no."

"I obviously have to get you back for that." vince grabs his own scoop of snow in his bare hands - because he claims he's too cool for gloves - and slowly begins packing it together.

"what? no." your hands drop from your face quickly, just as much your growing smirk. "I was just in the heat of the moment and I couldn’t help myself."

he shrugs nonchalantly, and the snow ball is getting tossed between his two bare hands mockingly - teasing you. "okay? and I'm also in the heat of the moment and I don't think I can stop myself."

"vince I swear to god if you decide today is the day you choose peace and put that snow back on the ground i'll forever be in your debt - why are you looking at me like that?"

the snow ball is still, lightly clutched in just one hand as vince looks at you. he's got an unreadable expression on his face, and it's one you've never seen before - he looks approachable and soft and so unlike the vince you've known since your freshman year.

you swallow gently - nervously - eyeing him curiously as you try to read his next move and understand his next actions before they happen. “you haven't called me vince since you were 14."

you're confused and vince can see it written all over your face. the downwards pull at your lips and the way your brows crease as you try and wrack your brain for an explanation. vince continues, his words firm but not rough. "you always call me vincent...It just made me think of the real you."

you're taken back from his words. the real you - what could vince mean by that insinuation. sure you've changed since high school, especially since vince broke your heart outside his bedroom that friday night freshmen year - but you're still you...you hope so anyways.

your mouth opens but no sounds come out - you're too busy reeling in your own head that you can't yet speak anything that would remotely make sense.

"there you are!" tracy's joyful voice interrupts as she and john make their way down the isle of trees you’re both in. "we've had no luck, unfortunately."

they come to a stop beside you, oblivious to the way you've gone completely internally crazy.

"any luck for you two? sammy and logan are at the hot chocolate stand waiting on us." john states, looking between you both.

"yeah," vince clears his throat and turns back towards the tree that you two had been attempting to unlatch. this time he's able to release the christmas tree from its rope in one try. "y/n found this one."

tracy immediately starts fussing excitedly, praising your eye. she goes on about how it will look wonderful by the fireplace, and how it's branches are so full and will compliment her home made ornaments perfectly - but you don't even feel like rubbing in the fact that you were right. you don't send vince any vindictive look, or some snarky smirk that says 'I told you so.' you can only focus on what vince's statement means.

thankfully sammy is a good distraction, and when you all meet up for the first time since arriving - vince lugging the tree behind him - and all share some hot chocolate and cider, you momentarily forget about it.

after another hour or so exploring the farm, you all decide to head back home - with a surprisingly perfect christmas tree and stomachs full and warm of hot chocolate.

sammy ends up passing out on your left quickly into the drive, her head resting against the cool glass car window with gentle snores passing through her lips. she must've been feeling tired, because she faught you for your previous seat - now you're stuck in the middle.

vince's arm is pressed into yours, and with every turn or bump in the road you can feel the way his muscles contract and move - even through the material of your puffy jacket.

you keep discreetly glancing over at him. you wish that you could read his mind or pull the thoughts right out of his head and understand them - but you can't, so you stealing glances will have to do for an attempt to understand him.

with tracy and john talking with one another in the front, voices blending with the holiday music they've turned up to block out sammy's snoring, you take an opportunity to get vince's attention.

"what did you mean by the real me?" your words aren't very loud as you don't want to draw the attention of vince's parents or wake sammy - which would ruin the chance of getting an understanding of vince's earlier words.

vince’s eyes flicker over to you, reluctantly pulling his attention away from where he was watching the road ahead through the gap between the passenger seat and car wall. his eyes dance over your wind kissed face and curious eyes, analyzing you. "it meant nothing."

you blink. "nothing? i'm going crazy here thinking that i've totally morphed into this super awful human and -"

"y/n." vince interrupts you roughly, his normal bored face making an appearance. "stop." his voice is almost pleading, like if you keep talking about it he'll become overcome with pain - vince's eyes flutter closed, and his head gently falls back against the head rest.

you don't say anything else because you're too hurt to further the conversation. you purse your lips, nodding in a bitter understanding before turning your face away from vince. you focus on the winter scenery outside sammy's window, doing your best to not feel further upset by vince's words - but you can't help the nagging feelings that swirl around your stomach, and the avalanche of emotions weighing in your head.

you don't even feel angry - just confused and left wondering what you did to make vince dislike you so much.

when did he become a stranger?

december 23rd

the santa day market in your town was always one of your favourite things about the christmas season. there was something about how all the shops decorated for the holiday, the streets put up garlands and lights, and how everyone came together to celebrate the most festive time of year never failed to put you in the christmas mood.

this year was no different, and with vince's mom being the one to always make sure you and your family all went together, here you all were - obviously with the lack of your parents, but that goes without saying.

the smell of snow and apple cider flows through the busy sidewalks, further adding to the festivities all around you. there's only an hour and a bit before the annual santa clause parade kicks off, and sammy had suggested that you all take the time to find secret santa gifts - if you haven't already.

you're happy for her suggestion, because with your and vince's tiff yesterday, buying a secret santa gift has slipped your mind.

the rest of the car ride home from the christmas tree farm was very quiet - well, you and vince were quiet - sammy's snoring and the music continued as loud as ever. the vibe between you and the oldest dunn sibling had changed, but not in the way you were now realizing you wanted it to change.

for the rest of the night, if vince did talk to you it wasn't with anger and irritation like you'd grown used to. instead he sounded more disappointed? maybe guilty? but then again, maybe your brain is trying to turn vince softer than he is, and he's not feeling any sort of remorse or guilt about how the conversation in the car went between you and it’s all in your head.

you push open the glass door of one of the boutiques lining the main street, the holly decorated wreath swinging against the window as you do so. inside is surprisingly busy considering all the attention seems to mostly be outside - but thankfully it's a relatively big store - full of cute clothing, accessories and anything in between - meaning you can browse freely without feeling overwhelmed.

it doesn't take long to start spotting things sammy would like, and you begin to make a mini collection of things in your arms. shopping for your best friends has always been so easy. sammy loves knitted sweaters, and you know she'd always wear one. she's also into perfumes and decorative tote bags. graphic baby tees, comfy pyjamas and lip gloss were also apart of sammy's never ending arsenal.

but with that being said, you can never pick exactly what you want a to give her. you always want it to be a perfect gift, and you have a hard time trying to pick one perfect thing - hence the heavy armful of various gift options.

something partnered catches your eye, and you find yourself double taking in its direction. it's beautiful throw blanket, and the soft material is decorated with vintage looking holiday homes, greenery and snowflakes- it's beautiful. with your free hand, you reach out and touch the front of it, gliding your hand across the baby soft blanket. you're immediately in love with it, and the urge to scrap the whole secret santa thing and spend your entire budget on the - no doubt - expensive throw is very strong.

but obviously that's not an option, and you'll have to just dream about the blanket longingly while your best friend enjoys her secret santa gift.

"your boots undone." you look away from the shelf loaded with various holiday blankets and in the direction of the voice.

it's vince, and you curse yourself for not registering the familiarity of his voice sooner. he's not holding any shopping bags, meaning he either previously bought his secret santa their gift, or he hasn't found anything yet.

you look down to your winter boots, which you can barley see over the monstrous pile of things still tucked against the crook of your elbow. vince is right - your left lace isn't tied up and is hanging dangerously, very close to causing you to trip.

"okay," you hum, eyes flickering back up towards him. "and what am I supposed to do about that right now?" it's a bold and snappy response from you considering the awkward and unknown vibes that have been circulating around you and vince the past 24 hours - but you can't help it, and falling into the original pattern between you is very easy.

vince still hasn't moved from a few feet away from where you had been looking at the blankets. his eyes dance between your face, the present options in your arms and the undone shoe lace.

suddenly he’s on the move and he walks towards you wordlessly. before you can register what he's doing, vince is tying your lace back up. he's down on one knee, which would usually give you the ick, but it seemingly doesn't - vince even double knots the lace, which is the cherry on top of your guilty ice cream.

once he returns to his full height and sends you a closed mouth smile, you further regret your snappy response about the undone shoelaces.

once again, vince's eyes wander down to the pile in your arms and his brows pull together in what looks like concern - whether that concern is for your arm strength or the amount of things in them...you'll never know.

"don't worry vince i'm not your secret santa."

his eyes change, a flicker of something you recognize but can't put your finger on - but it has your weird nervousness settling down. vince snickers softly, almost like he was laughing to himself. "thank god for that - I don't think those clothes would fit me."

your chest flutters with something like relief, and although you know you shouldn't so easily forget about vince's cold shoulder yesterday, it's hard when his gentle laughter warms your belly unexpectedly. so for now you decide to forget, and a small smile pulls at your lips as you eye vince teasingly. "mhmm I don't know, I think you could rock these pink frills."

his brows raise slightly, pleasantly surprised at your playful expression. "just because I would, doesn't mean I should." vince picks up a bedazzled set of salt and pepper shakers nearby and inspects them closely. you think they're gaudy and clearly vince thinks the same - he glances at you and pulls a face, putting down the set of sparkly condiment holders.

"oh, you think you're hot stuff?" you tease him further, the comment about the pink frilly sweater still prevalent on your mind.

vince snickers one more, gently prodding the side of his cheek with his tongue to stop his smile from growing any further. he doesn't answer your question but the look on his face is enough of an answer. "you're not getting sammy all of that are you?" his gaze shifts back towards the pile in your arms, and he even reaches out and tugs on one of the arms from a patterned top.

"wha!" you stutter a mixed sound of huh and what passing through your open mouth - your eyes blown wide as you eye him questionably. "how do you know I have sammy?”

vince smirks, "process of elimination."

you squint at him accusatorially, trying to decide if he actually has done some process of elimination in his head, or if vince is just trying to trick you into telling him who you’re secret santa for. "fine," you hum, admitting defeat. "no i'm not getting sammy all of this! I just....cant decide."

vince smiles victoriously - obviously he knew he was right. "you're so indecisive."

"no, i'm not." you sing song.

vince matches your pitch, mimicking you. "you are."

"you don't even know what you're talking about." you breathe gently, a small bubble of laughter following.

"okay, then go put some stuff back if you're so sure and not indecisive." vince eyes you challengingly, gesturing towards the bustling shop.

"fine," you chirp. "don't miss me too much."

"oh," he laughs, "I won't."

you walk back through the store, slowly putting the random things back into appropriate spots. you don't even remember picking up a zebra printed scarf, but there it was in your arms - and you can't help but pull a face as you hang it back around a mannequin.

"y/n y/l/n is that you?" evan's voice is practically engraved in your memory at this point, and you'd recognize it even over the cheery christmas music blaring through the stores speakers.

you turn towards the direction of his voice, and unfortunately your mind wasn't playing tricks on you - your ex boyfriend was in the shop, looking at you with a bright smile and snow dusted coat. to make everything 10 times worse than it already was, his new girlfriend was wrapped around his arm, just as happy looking as evan.

your face pales, and you slowly finish putting away the sparkly handbag on the shelf in front of you - previously stopping once each called your name. "yeah, it's me."

they walk right up to you, clearly unbothered by the whole situation. evan looks like he's greeting an old friend from highschool - one that he wasn't in a loving relationship with for years and broke up with only weeks ago. it stabs at your chest, even though you don't love him anymore. "wow, I wasn't expecting to run into you here." evan exhales, eyeing you with a curious gaze.

you wonder if he’s analyzing you - looking for damage he caused after your breakup. you’re happy that you washed your hair this morning and put on some proper makeup before coming out, and that you look - hopefully - somewhat presentable - you don’t want to boost your exes ego by letting him think he has any affect on you.

how evan wasn't expecting to see you in a town you live in and always have lived in is beyond your thought process - but evans never been the sharpest tool in the shed, so it makes sense. he continues, "are you here by yourself? or is your mom around here somewhere? I swear I was just telling jen about how much your mom used to love this store -" you zone out - oh so she has a name?

"hey I was wondering where you went." vince's words are a shock, and the way his large palm touches your lower back and slowly wraps around to the front of your torso even more so. "thought we agreed to meet back up outside the store - not inside."

you blink, looking back at vince. "what?" ever so slightly his eyes widen as if he's trying to tell you to go with it.

"dunner? holy shit" evan's voice brings you back to reality. "what are you doing home?"

vince looks away from you, and an easy going smile takes over his face. "my schedule worked out and was able to come home for christmas. thank god because I was missing y/n/n too much."

"you were?" you gawk.

vince’s teeth are clenched tightly, but his smile never waivers as he looks down at you once again. "of course babe." his fingers pinch your belly gently, another reminder to play along.

babe. oh.

"babe?" evan questions. his blue eyes flicker between you and his old friend, and you can practically see as the puzzle pieces in front of him piece together - the hand around your waist, the pet name, the look in your eyes he's never seen before. "you guys are together?"

you nod once and you sort of resemble a robot with the almost reluctant movement- vince has to take a deep, calming breath and resist the urge to die at the cause of your awful acting. "yeah, we are together."

your conformation has evan smiling - which you don't think would happen. you expected a grimace or even some sort of negative outburst at his ex and his old friend dating - but no. "I always thought you two secretly liked each other - all that hating each other crap wasn't believable."

vince goes stiff behind you, and even though he recovers quickly, you still feel it. you can't believe this is happening. you think the world might swallow you up and save you from the awkwardness that is this conversation.

completely oblivious, evan continues. " isn't it crazy how we both found our true matches after each other." the look evan sends jen has you feeling even more embarrassed and miserable, and you can't decide if your going to laugh, cry, or throw up - or all three.

"we should probably go," jen pats evan's peck affectionately. "your parents are already at the parade spot waiting for us."

"it was nice seeing you guys - you look great together." evan smiles at you both, wrapping an arm around his girlfriends shoulders as they steer through the crowd inside the shop, and make their way towards the exit.

evans words continue to ring through your head as you check out at the cash register. you ended up choosing the very first thing you picked up for sammy, because your first option is always the one you go back to.

you leave the store quickly after getting the gift receipt, and vince is close on your heels as you two make your way down the busy sidewalk.

"are you okay?" vince almost sounds cautious with his tone, and you can feel his eyes flicking across your side profile - trying to find the answer to his question before you tell him.

you glance up at him quickly. “If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were worried about me." your attempt at humor isn't working, and vince doesn't crack even a half smile at your teasing. your face falls, and you sigh gently, "i'll be fine."

he nods thoughtfully, but doesn't seem all that convinced by your words. it's silent for a few moments between you, walking together down the sidewalk back in the direction of where tracy told everyone to meet back up at - right under the clock tower for the parade.

"it’s okay if you're feeling hurt after seeing evan and his new girlfriend. just because you don't love him anymore, doesn't mean it's nice to see that." after a few beats, vince sighs. "do you remember amanda?" he asks you curiously.

your nose scrunches unpleasantly - how could your forget amanda? amanda was vince's awfully short-term girlfriend in the summer going into your sophomore year of highschool - his first year of college. she was very picky, rude, and always made sure to remind everyone that she felt that she was superior to them. you make a noise between a gag and a scoff. "I hated her."

vince laughs once, shoving his hands in his pockets as continue to walk through the busy sidewalks. "I could tell. honestly, she didn't like you either."

"I knew it." you cheer vindictively, because you knew you weren't crazy for thinking that - even though sammy disagreed. "she used to give me these dirty looks - specific ones like she was trying to burn me alive using just her eyes." your gaze flickers back to vince, and your brows pull curiously. "why did you break up? besides the obvious….witchy reasons."

he smiles softly and shrugs. "amanda was never shy about expressing her feelings about anything or anyone, which I never faulted her for even If i disagreed. but when she started talking badly about you, I broke it off."

"oh."

vince continues. "I never let anybody talk about you negatively, y/n. ever. and amanda wasn't an exception to that." he swallows gently, eyes dancing over your face. his expression is soft again, and familiar. it’s a look that makes you forget that the vince in front of you right now is the same one who broke your heart in high school - the same vince you thought you hated.

you now notice that you've both stopped walking and are standing still in the middle of the sidewalk. the sky is practically enveloped into darkness now, only lit up by the buildings light glow and christmas lights decorating the street.

you feel so seen in this moment - you feel completely normal. vince is looking at you in a way you've never seen before, and you can't help but wonder if he's always been looking at you like this but you've been too blinded by words to notice.

vince clears his throat, and a breathy chuckle passes his lips. "I mean after all, i'm the only one who gets to be a dick to you…right?”

his words feel like a slap in the face. is vince admitting that he only defended you to amanda because he was upset somebody else was being mean to you besides himself? - rather than the sole purpose of defending you because he cares about you? you don't let yourself outwardly show how vince's words affected you, and you force a gentle smile. "right."

you don't want to get upset and ruin the relationship dynamic between you and the vince standing infront of you - because something has undoubtedly changed. you're not sure what it is yet, but you like this version of you and vince better than any version from the past 10 years.

you also don't know what vince means with his last comment, and you're not sure if you want to know. so you choose to ignore it - just like you ignored the situation between you yesterday and how you've ignored the unspoken and underlying issue of your and vince's relationship for years.

december 24th

"stop moving or the walls are going to fall."

"the walls are going to fall because you're not using enough icing - it's going to fall weather i'm holding it together or not." vince expresses. to prove his point, he loosens his push on the gingerbread house wall, and it immediately wobbles and begins to collapse inwards.

vince brings his thumb up towrds his mouth and sucks some of the store bought vanilla icing off the digit. his eyes don't leave you as he does so- trying to fluster you with his actions. you narrow your eyes pointedly, which makes a smirk appear on vince's flushed face. he laughs at your attempt at looking annoyed all while trying to keep the sad gingerbread house from completely collapsing.

vince's mom had magically pulled out two separate gingerbread kits in the late afternoon after she put the honey ham in the oven. sammy was up on her feet immediately at the sight, her competitive nature coming to a tilt - which meant that she needed the gingerbread building to be a competition, and claimed her boyfriend as her building partner.

logan doesn't protest the partnership, which leaves you and vince no choice - if this was the beginning of your stay with the dunn family, having vince be your partner would've sent you to the grave, but now with some of the negative air clearing, you don't hate the idea, but quickly into the start of your timed - yes sammy insisted the building to be timed - gingerbread house competition, vince is proving to be rather difficult to work with.

vince seems more interested in teasing you and trying to push your buttons in a almost flirtatious way, and if he's not talking, he's completely trying to change any of your previous work and alter the look of the gingerbread house - claiming 'it looks too similar to theirs, c'mon y/n/n we gotta step it up.'

"just get the gumdrops out." you dismiss him, looking away from his intense gaze and back towards the gingerbread. thankfully you've managed to get the house back into its original stature, and the house is looking less sad and lopsided than before - although some of the icing has glooped and dropped off the seams and made a sticky mess on the candy rock path.

vince snickers at your demand, finishing up with the icing residue on his thumb - because he knew if he passed you a sticky, icing covered gumdrop package you'd loose your mind. "where do you want them coach?" vince's words are softly spoken against your ear as and attempt to try and keep your discussion from being overheard by his sister and logan across the table.

you hold back the pleasant shutter that wants to take over your body, and keeping your eyes on the gingerbread house is the best way to stay calm and collected - if you look at vince right now you may crumble. what is wrong with you right now? "I think under the windows? a boarder around the house will bring it all together."

you gesture to the part of the house where the brown cookie meets the flimsy plastic base, which is only covered in icing and is severely lacking decor.

vince hums. "really? I feel like the roof is the only thing that looks incomplete. I think the gumdrops will look better there." he runs one of his fingers on the ridge where the two pieces of cookie meet, mimicking the point of a roof.

"what?" you screech slightly, gaze flickering between the cookie creation and vince. "I think the roof looks cute how it is - with the peppermint swirls"

"yes but look at logan and sammy's -" you do as he says and let yourself finally look at your friends gingerbread house. you can tell logan has had absolutely no say in the design of the house, and it's clearly the cause of a sammy dictation. vince continues, "all they've got on the roof is peppermint swirls. adding the gumdrops to our house will make it stand out. you want to win right?"

you look back at vince and nod definitively. "yes, I want to win."

he smiles. "atta girl, wanna put them on?"

you flush a deep red at his words. "no, you do it. If I do it you'll end up moving them anyways."

your teasing doesn't go unnoticed by vince, and he clicks his tongue in a playful manner, "yeah because you probably wouldn't of done it right."

the wine you've been sipping all afternoon and into the evening is definitely tinkering with your emotions - vince the same. it would explain how the evening between you is flowing so smoothly, and any teasing dig is met with laughter instead of anger. you giggle quietly, "you're so annoying."

vince ducks his head to keep your eye contact once you begin to smile downwards into your chest. his smirk doesn't dissolve, and if anything, it changes into a more sultry one. "I know you love it y/n/n, you can't deny it." he licks his bottom lip, wetting the pink skin so it glistens. vince chuckles, "now move your hand...unless you want to be covered in gum drops."

he then proceeds to add a single file line of gumdrops on the roof, sticking the widest part of the gummy candy into the dewy icing that holds the pieces in place. in the most obnoxious and high pitched voice you can manage, you repeat vince's words back to him. you watch as vince smiles and a few laughs bubble up his chest at your teasing - he doesn't look away from the task at hand and continues decorating your gingerbread house.

you feel like you're in freshman year again, stealing secretive glances at your best friends older brother while he wasn't paying attention. vince looks almost the same as he did when you were younger, but his teenage features have chiseled out, leaving him with the most sculpted and attractive profile. god this wine is really changing you - your fluttering heart and butterfly filled stomach are really a recipe for disaster.

"okay kids one more minute left for your houses, then dad and I will come in and judge them." tracy tells you all from around the corner, not quite yet coming fully into the kitchen to avoid spoiling the houses for herself. you hear sammy curse from her moms warning, and she starts frantically looking for the mini snowflakes to icing glue onto the window sills of her and logan's gingerbread house.

vince looks back towards you, and once he catches your gaze already on him, his smirk slinks back upwards. "any finishing touches?"

you're not even embarrassed at being caught, and you don't mind how smug vince looks at the sight of your clear attraction. you shake your head, "no...it's perfect."

vince can't help his eyes from flickering down to your lips, lingering on your wine painted flesh for a few moments before dragging his eyes back up your face. his brow quirks curiously, but the smile he's wearing never wavers. "I agree."

tracy and john come in after you've all cleaned up the area and presented your respective gingerbread houses in a viewing manner - displaying them proudly on the kitchen island. it doesn't take long for them to decide their winner, and when the dunn couple gestures to your amd vince's candy land themed house, you cheer. vince squeezes around your waist, pulling you into his side, exclaiming that he knew you could beat sammy.

that has her scoffing, "you two are so annoying." she's not being serious - the tiny smile on her face giving it away. logan kisses her temple reassuringly, promising that her gingerbread house is his favourite.

"don't be a sore loser." vince laughs, eyeing his sister victoriously.

"now, vince you're not one to talk." tracy corrects him, and a small smile pops on her face. she tries to hide it behind her hand as she continues. "you used to get so upset when you were little if we picked sammy's house. you'd cry like a baby and beg for us-"

"alright mom." vince stops her with laughter.

"oh my god, so you've always been a big baby?” you look up at him teasingly, a challenging lift to your eyebrows.

"oh, always." you laugh at that, allowing yourself to further lean into vince's side. he smells like grape wine and cinnamon, completed with a hint of store bought icing - an interesting combination by somehow its smells exactly like him.

it's an odd place to be - next to vince and so willingly giving in to the urges you've been suppressing for years. allowing yourself to be wrapped up in his presence and the comfort of all things vince - his almost always flirtatious smirk, the spicy scent he's always bathed in and the way his gaze always seems to linger.

you don't hate vince dunn - you never have. even when he broke you heart in freshman year and left you to cry silently beside his sister in bed, you didn't hate him, you just hated how he made you feel. you had a hard time accepting that vince didn't like you back - whether it was because you were too young or because he simply didn't feel that way for you, you struggled with that fact, which lead to your own feelings converting into a more harsh and negative outlook towards vince.

you realize now, even after 4 or 5 hefty glasses of warm wine, that you were wrong in the way of dealing with your feelings - and by no means does that excuse the way vince has behaved, but you are willing to hear him out....that is if he wants to talk about it. perhaps when you're both a bit more sober tomorrow - your brain reminds you quickly.

after a few classic movies - the grinch being sammy's pick and christmas vacation being johns - tracy had mentioned that santa won't come unless you're all in bed. her sing song tone has everyone giggling in the dim family room, only illuminated by the twinkling christmas tree in the corner, the laughter coming easy with your stomachs full of honey ham and wine.

it's not long after that, and a few more minutes of meaningless conversation, you all slowly head to bed. there's a good 5 minutes that sammy makes you lay face down in her bed while she wraps her secret santa gift (the queen of last minute). anytime she curses and you can hear the wrapping paper tear, it has you giggling into the pillow - which then leads to sammy trying to scold you but her giggles vito any kind of rebuke.

you're still not ready for bed by the time sammy finishes gift wrapping - which ended up being way longer than 5 measly minutes. as soon as she allows you to get off her bed, you're instantly calling dibs on the bathroom and you quickly grab your snowflake patterned toiletry bag and slip out of the room.

the bathroom is steamy, and the mirror along with the damp floor mat indicates somebody is not long out of the shower - presumably vince since he's the only other one on the upstairs floor.

you wipe the condensation off the mirror with the palm of your hand, cleaning the glass so you are able to properly see yourself while you unwind for the night. you begin going through your skin-care routine, granted with the alcohol pumping through your bloodstream, it isn't as skillful or in depth as it normally would be - when you wipe your face with the towel, there's black marks of mascara left behind.

you dig for your toothbrush in the clutter of your toiletry bag, excited for the last step in your night routine before you're able to get back in bed. you locate it and let out a triumphant breath - taking the tube of toothpaste out of the holder as you do so.

a knock on the open bathroom door stops you, and through the mirror you look up and see vince. you were correct in assuming it was him in the shower as he stands there now with damp hair, and fresh cologne scented skin - you're pretty sure there's still a few drops of water sliding down his pecks, because of course he's only got pyjamas bottoms on right now, leaving his torso completely bare.

"I forgot to brush my teeth." he says warmly. vince holds your eye contact through the mirror, watching the way you blink at him all flirtatiously - god this wine is really doing a number on your suppressed feelings.

you glance over your shoulder. "I don't mind company."

vince walks further into the dewy bathroom, rounding to the other side of you. he quirks a brow in your direction. "even mine?"

you watch him pick up his own toothbrush, gliding a dollop of toothpaste over the blue bristles. you put your own minty toothbrush in your mouth, holding it in your cheek momentarily. "even yours."

vince's smirk can't even be hidden by his toothbrush, which he shoves in his mouth - brushing his perfect teeth around his undeniable amused grin. his firm brushing movements, combined with his lack of shirt give you the perfect view to watch his muscles as they shift and flex beneath his soft skin, creating a much unexpected sensation to run through you.

vince catches your stare, the movements of his toothbrush coming to a slow pause as he looks back at you. you don't feel the need to shy away from his sensual gaze like you normally would find yourself doing, but instead you hold the eye contact - your own smile forming around the handle of the toothbrush.

you lean forward to spit into the sink, rinsing your mouth with some running water from the tap before rising back to your full height.

vince follows suit, spitting his excess foamy toothpaste into the sink, letting the water wash away any remnants down the drain. you put your toothbrush back into its respective holder and shove it back in your toiletry bag. you tuck your bag under your arm just as vince stands back up, wiping his mouth of any leftover water.

there's a moment then where you're just looking at one another through the foggy bathroom - your eyes locked together say enough than your mouths could ever. regret, apologies, uncertainty, teasing, flirting, the unkown...the gaze you're locked in says it all.

your belly swoops, and this time you know it's because of vince - it's always been because of vince. "goodnight vincent." the use of his full name is only used as a playful and amorous parting, and you blink towards him slowly and innocently. you turn away from him just as slow as your fluttering eyes.

his bottom lip tucks between his teeth as he watches you - vince knows that you know exactly what you're doing and it has him acting before his brain can even comprehend itself.

he grabs your wrist and spins you back around before you even step foot outside the bathroom. your bag falls to the floor from the sudden movement, and you know you didn't zip it properly, so you're not looking forward to dealing with that mess - but the way vince grabs your face roughly and kisses you has you forgetting all about it.

the kiss is immediately rough and fast - a mixture of longing and desire stemming from many years of doubt and fear, crumpled into one explosive kiss. you're both instantly grabbing at one another, desperate to feel one another to a greater extent. vince's hands are all over your body, like he can't decide where he wants to touch you most. he's running his fingers through your hair, gently tugging the roots at the base of your neck in a way that has you groaning into his mouth. his hands glide over your body, paying attention to every curve and dip as he holds and grabs you.

you’re no better with your hands frantically running over his toned exposed skin. your nails gently rake over his abs, and you can feel the affect the feeling has on vince as goosebumps form right under your fingertips. you're holding the budge of his biceps, keeping him close to you as you both continue the electric kiss. the room suddenly seams as steamy as ever, the thick and hot air surprising you, further contributing to the hurried movements and messy tangle of lips.

vince spins you around once again, so your back is towards the vanity mirror. your lower back bumps the edge of the ceramic countertop, and not even the bruising sting can register in your mind over the way vince is kissing and touching all over your skin. smoothly as ever, vince's lips pull away from yours, giving you the time and space to collect your laboured breath. his kisses move down from the corner of your mouth and across your warm jawline. you gasp and wither against him, eyes fluttering shut as the sensation of his sloppy kisses move towards your neck.

vince reaches the junction of your neck and shoulder, and he wastes no time in suckling the soft and flushed skin. without pulling away from you, he uses his foot to shut the bathroom door and the gentle thud echos throughout the hallway.

"is this okay?" he speaks against your skin, his mouth detaching from the blossoming hickey he'd been working on. vince fully pulls away from you, much to your dismay, and meets your gaze - a questioning haze in his eyes, reflecting his question.

you sigh, "yes. more than okay."

this time, you're the one to reach for him, and you pull his head down so you're able to meet for another heavy kiss. vince's tongue swipes against your bottom lip quickly, asking for entrance to further explore to kiss once again. you let him, again, letting your tongues glide and slip around one another in the midst of your make out.

vince uses his leg to gently prod your thighs apart, which you had previously been desperately clenching together in search of the tiniest bit of friction. as soon as vince's chiseled, defined leg muscle settles between your legs, providing a deliciously sharp and satisfying touch to your fluttering core, you're moaning.

instinctively, your hips begin to move against him, searching for that release. one of vince's hands leave its spot from where it was previously holding around your neck, and slinks down your body until he's landing on your ass. with a guiding hand, he firmly grabs ahold of one asscheek and begins to pull and push you over his thigh - helping your grind against him.

you pull away from his mouth as you become too built up with the empending release that is on the horizon. you breath heavily, and your eyes are screwed shut as vince continues to drag your clothed core against his covered thigh. you're sure your thin candy cane printed pyjama shorts are drenched in your own arousal, leaking onto the plaid material of vince's pants - but you don't even care or feel embarrassed...if anything it's turning you on further, and from the hard bulge pressing against your leg, it seems to be doing the same for vince.

vince's forehead falls against yours, bringing you back to the reality of the situation. through your lashes, you look up at him, only to find he's already watching you - watching every single twitch of a reaction on your flushed face. "I'm close." your sighed words are quickly morphed into a moan as vince's grip tightens on your ass.

"fuck. wanna come like this?" he questions quickly, continuing to move your hips forward and backwards against him.

you mewl slightly, and if you don't stop soon you will end up further soaking his pyjamas bottoms as you cum. "I want you to be inside of me."

"yeah?" vince breathes out, his guiding movements coming to a slow stop at your words. you nod against him, and your hips continue to jut over him at just the mere thought of vince filling you up. "fuck okay, let's turn around yeah?"

you let him handle you easily, vince spinning your body until your belly is pushing against the counter top. with a firm hand he pushes on the middle of your spine until you’re naturally lying flat on the counter, and your legs spread automatically.

vince is immediately pulling down your shorts and you moan out at the feeling of the material sticking to your seeping core, no doubt dripping with your edging release. the bathroom is burning hot, and the mirror has gone completely opaque from the steam caused by your and vince's interlocking lips and steamy touches. it has everything feeling much more sensual and sexy - and the tension of your impending release is becoming almost painful.

you wiggle your hips around, pushing as far back as you can with the limited space in search of vince's hips. "be paintent." vince tuts his tongue against the roof of his mouth, and then you feel the press of his torso against your back. he presses a kiss to your exposed shoulder from where your oversized shirt has slipped down. "I was admiring the view." to further accentuate his words, two of his fingers slide through your wet folds, moving to collect your arousal.

you bite your lip, sighing pleasantly at the feeling of pressure from vince's fingers prodding your entrance, moving up to flutter over your throbbing clit. "you can admire the view another time, vince - please fuck me."

vince's large palm comes down and smacks the round of your ass. you let out a breathy laugh, the sound almost resembling a squeal at the feeling. it has vince smirking as he soothes the sting by rubbing over your reddening ass.

your laughter quickly shifts into a deep mewl as vince's head prods your entrance, almost immediately slipping into your opening from the dripping arousal. you push your hips backwards and he fully slides into you, filling you completely. your ass brushes against vince's hipbones, taking the length of his dick completely.

"shit." he curses, twitching inside you. vince grabs ahold of your hips, and immediately starts to pull out of you. just before his head has a chance of leaving your tight entrance, vince pushes his length back into you fully, igniting another round of moans from you both.

"keep doing that." you are practically begging him as you try and look over your shoulder and attempt to catch the sight of his length plummeting in and out of your pussy. you bite your lip, trying to hold onto some of the moans you're desperately wanting to let out. "fuck i'm not going to last long - you feel too good."

vince moans, and his eyes flicker away from where your bodies are frantically moving and connecting together in favour of meeting your eyes. "you're so hot, fuck the way you look at me - i'm trying really hard to not destroy you right now."

"you think you're hot stuff?" you challenge him, unable to resist the temptation of being playful with vince.

vince bites into his lips at your comment, holding onto his sultry smirk. without stopping his thrusts into you, he lets go of his grip on your hips and reaches up to your biceps. vince pulls your body off the counter, back until your flush against his warm chest. one of his hands wraps around your torso, keeping you in place, while his other reaches past you to wipe the sticky condensation off the mirror - giving you a hazy view of your intertwined bodies.

the sight of his dick nestled so far into your pussy is instantly making you moan, and you clench around his length automatically. vince curses at the feeling, and his hand that he used to wipe the mirror with now comes up around your shoulders and neck, wrapping around you to further keep you pressed to him. vince continues his forceful and steady thrusts into your entrance, and with the new angle of your bodies, they feel even deeper and better than before. "holy shit, vince - yes, just like that."

"can feel you squeezing me," he huffs into your neck, pressing a quick kiss to your salty skin. your shirt has slipped further down your arm, and has left your boob exposed, bouncing roughly against you as vince pounds into your pussy from behind.

it looks like something straight out of a porno in the bathroom mirror, and even through the fog that is building back over the mirror, you can see the way you're dripping onto the floor as your orgasm approaches.

your hand reaches up and grips vince's forearm, grounding yourself from his eye-rolling thrusts up into you. "you gunna cum, pretty girl? fuck you're making a mess on the floor."

"yes, yes, yes." you chant breathless, and your eyes begin to flutter shut as the coil in your stomach begins to snap. your head lolls backwards, falling against vince shoulder and as he continues his feverish pace into you, the band snaps and your orgasm comes to a hilt. "i'm cumming." you whine, your nails digging into the skin of vince's arm as you ride the high of bliss.

behind you, vince begins to chase his own approaching release. his hips smack against your ass at a frantic speed and he continues to thrust into your slippery, sopping pussy. his movements soon become less organized and in sync as he comes close. vince tilts you back down towards the counter, laying you down flat once more as he approaches his high. with only a few more rough pumps into you, vince pulls out of your warmth and blows his load onto your red ass, spewing up to your lower back and creating a sticky, hot, white mess on you. "holy shit."

"holy shit." you repeat.

a few beats pass until vince is cleaning his load off your body, delicately wiping away all traces of his cum with some tissue before immediately flushing the evidence down the toilet.

the bathroom is ridiculous hot and sticky, and no doubt your hair has turned into a frizzy and disgruntled mess. the thought of having to put your soaked pyjamas shorts back on is detrimental, and you're so worn out from vince taking you to pound town that you debate falling asleep on the counter - naked from the waist down and everything.

vince laughs gently at your lack of energy, and he lightly taps your ass cheek to grab your attention. he's pulled his pants back up, and there's a visible wet mark from your earlier grinding - but he doesn't mind one bit. "you need help getting up?"

"yeah." your muffled whine has him laughing further, but he doesn't ignore you. gently, vince helps you off the counter and into a standing position. your knees wobble slightly and vince's smirk grows. you eye him pointedly. "don't smirk - you did this to me."

"you asked for it." he reminds you gently. you scowl slightly, and that has vince's soft laughter continuing. you can't be upset when he helps you pull your pyjamas back on, letting you use his shoulder for balance as he makes you lift one foot at a time into the leg holes of your christmas jammies. "need help getting into bed?"

you walk slightly and although you're a bit shaky, you can still move somewhat normally. you look at vince, "no, i'll be okay." you look towards the mess on the floor caused by your spilled toiletry bag - various things of makeup and skincare scattered in the tiles. you don't think you have the capacity to bend down and pick that up right now.

as if he can read your mind, vince bends down and begins to gather your things. "I can clean this - it's the least I could do." he looks up at you from one knee and sends you a quick wink. for a second you have the dirty thought of vince on his knees in front of you, except of cleaning up your things he's got you pushed against a wall, your legs spread open as he attacks your pussy with his mouth - licking and kissing against your heat until you’re screaming.

unfortunately you don't think your trembling body could handle that right now - it can barley handle standing. so instead of that, you smirk down at him. "goodnight."

"goodnight," his smile widens.

after one more sultry glance, you hobble back down the hall and towards sammy's room. you gently open the door, trying your best to keep quiet. like you hoped it would be, the room is completely dark and the sound of sammy's light snoring alerts you to her sleeping state.

you celebrate internally, happy that you don't have to answer a line of questions about why you've been in the bathroom for 30 minutes when you should've only been gone for 10 max.

you slip into bed gently, allowing your racing heart to have a chance to finally return to its normal beating pattern. thoughts of vince and the activities you've just participated in together - in the childhood bathroom no less - running through your mind. as much as you enjoyed and loved the sex you just experienced with vince, the question about your relationship still remains.

you're not sure if the sex will change anything between you, negatively or positively, but you know the conversation needs to happen. as you're falling into a slumber, dread as well as excitement is flowing through your veins - the unknown of it all very much present.

december 25th

"we have arrived - merry christmas!" sammy's voice is rather cheerful considering the early morning, but it is christmas so that's definitely a factor to her tone. you follow behind her down the stairs as you both descend into the family room, both in your christmas pyjamas and slightly hungover - you in different pyjamas than the ones you ruined last night.

"merry christmas!" tracy cheers from the couch, a steaming cup of coffee in her hands. she looks not long awake, with her eyes still squinty and smile still sleepy. it's only 8 o'clock , but the tradition in the dunn household on christmas morning was always an 8 a.m. wake up call, and that wasn't going to change this year.

it seems like you and sammy are the last ones downstairs with the sight of tracy on the couch and john beside her, his own steaming mug sitting on a santa face coaster on the coffee table. just then, vince emerges from the kitchen with two mugs in his hands. you can smell hot chocolate, so you can only assume that's the contents of the coffee mugs.

"oh vince, are those for us?" sammy is instantly bounding over to her brother. she leans in and sniffs the drink, and a bright smile grows on her face as she does so. she takes her gnome design mug out of his hands, and skips over to the couch with her hot chocolate - merely missing spilling the entire drink on the rug.

vince passes you the other mug wordlessly. it is hot chocolate, completed with mini marshmallows and tiny pieces of crushed candy canes - a christmas morning classic. you look up at him gently, and you can't help the bright smile that grows on your lips at just the sight of vince. "hey, thanks."

vince nods and...that's it. he walks passed you and around the reclining chair that lines the entrance of the family room. your face falls with disappointment, and you can't help but feel embarrassed regarding the hopes following your actions last night. it's fine if vince still doesn't want you in any way thay you've been wanting him, but not even a 'you're welcome' or a 'hello’ stings.

you take a seat beside sammy, who once you're seated , immediately starts pitching to her parents on why she should be the first to open her secret santa present. your best friends voice helps you stay distracted in not looking over at vince adjacent from you - sitting silently in the recliner.

the lights from the tree twinkle is your peripheral vision, a constant in your eyes as you try and focus on the present and not dwell on the unknown with vince. as tracy moves across the tree in retrieval for her daughters gift, you're blinking back into reality once again, the light pattern changing is what brings you back. once her mom passes her the santa wrapping paper covered box, sammy is immediately tearing it apart. you smile automatically, always pleased with how excitable sammy gets when it comes to holidays and opening presents.

she pulls out the lilac fuzzy robe and matching slippers that you'd wrapped between layers of tissue paper in the box, and she's immediately gasping out. "I love it - somebody clearly knows me well."

"okay, we'll save your guess until the end." tracy reminds her daughter, but she's looking between all of you as she says it. "don't want to ruin the surprise for anybody else." tracy ends up going next after john suggested it, and she ends up opening a beautiful set of holiday mugs filled with different teas, coffees and treats - cookies, candy canes and chocolates all stuffed into the mugs. she of course loves it, and instantly tells vince that his next trip into the kitchen she wants to try one of her new teas.

you're the next one to open a present, and a rather large box is sitting on your lap. it's wrapped in reflective silver wrapping paper, and a large red bow sits on the top corner of the present. curious about the gift inside the stunning and well done wrapping, you tear it open.

"you're not doing it fast enough - rip the damn paper cindy lou." sammy grunts beside you, obviously impatient. you giggle just as you finally unwrap the box. saving sammy and yourself from the curiosity of the contents of inside, you lift the lid off the box. at the sight of the gift, your face falters slightly. under a layer of red tissue paper, starring back at you in the christmas blanket from the boutique downtown.

the soft christmas blanket decorated with vintage homes and snowflakes that you had fallen in love with only two days ago. you know there's only one person who could've known about the blanket and that's the only person in this living room who was in that store. your eyes flicker towards vince. he's still not smiling - he's not even looking at you.

tracy gasps, "oh wow that's beautiful!" you feel your face heat up with a mixture of disappointment, disbelief and sadness. you feel overwhelmed and confused by the contradictory messages of vince's actions, and you feel like the room is shrinking as you continue to look between vince and the blanket in your lap. without wanting to make too much of a scene, you put the gift on the coffee table. "sorry, I just need to step away for a moment."

"oh, okay - are you alright?" tracy questions gently, her warm eyes following you as you walk through the family room and towards the stairs.

"yeah, of course. please continue, i'll be back soon." you quickly make your way back up the carpeted steps, trying your best to hold in all your confused thoughts and emotions until you're in a private space - to top everything off, your feel ridiculous and the guilt is starting to sink in that you’ve ruined christmas.

you step into sammy's open bedroom and place a hand to your burning forehead - an attempt at doing something to calm down. you let your eyes flutter to a close, and take a few deep breaths. you feel so uncertain and overwhelmed with this weird unknown tension lingering between you and vince, and you're scared having sex with him last night did the complete opposite of what you hoped for. you're scared that vince doesn't view you as anything more than just a stranger - a body he's been moving around for years and disregarding because he's got no real connection or feelings for.

with the sex last night, you had the impression that it would act as that changing factor you've been searching for for years. this christmas seemed to be the very top of the tall mountain you and vince have been chasing each other up for years, pushing at one another to see who would be the first to break that climb - but now you think you may have fallen backwards instead of coming down the other side with vince beside you.

"are you okay?" vince steps into the room, the floorboard that sits directly under the doorframe creaks from his weight. when you were younger you hated that floorboard, it made for sammy and you to sneak out very hard, and most of the time it was the reason you'd just stay home instead of going out and partying with the senior boys team back in high school.

"no, i'm not okay - what are we doing?" your hands fall, and the pure exhaustion of dealing with your own scrambled thoughts is seemingly catching up to you. you feel like complete jello, even more so than after last night - your nerves about this whole ordeal at an all time high. "why do you hate me, vince? what did I do to make you hate me?"

vince is confused, naturally. he walks further into sammy's bedroom, closer to you. "you think I actually hate you?"

a mixture between a disbelieving laugh and a scoff forms in the back of your throat. "you're not giving me many reasons which tell me that you like me, are you? and no, fucking me against the bathroom counter really doesn't count as a good reason, at all." maybe your latter comment was uncalled for, sure, but your head is still reeling with a jumbled collection of thoughts and insecurities, that you really don't care.

vince runs a hand through his hair, his fingers almost frantic like he's not sure what to do with them. he licks his bottom lip gently, and he slowly looks around your face. you feel yourself wanting to blush - needing to blush - under his intense gaze, but you don't allow yourself to get flustered. vince sighs gently, and his brows dip in disappointment. "I don't hate you, y/n - I could never hate you." vince is disappointed in himself for treating you so poorly to the extent of which you thought he hated you - that was never his intention.

"then why did you act like you did?" your bottom lip trembles with emotion, and you hate that feeling. you don't want to seem weak or affected by his behaviour, even if it has made you upset - especially if he's about to tell you that you mean nothing to him...again.

vince sighs gently, his large eyes swimming with a hundred different emotions of his own. "because i'm a dick...and I was confused and maybe even a little scared." he pauses, swallowing his nerves as they begin to creep up his throat. you still look unsure, so vince continues. "I would act a certain way around you because I didn't know how else to act - or what to do. anytime I was mean or rude or acted this nasty way towards you it wasn't because I didn't like you, it was because I liked you too much. every petty comment, look or action was a bad attempt at me stopping myself from kissing you."

you inhale sharply, "what?"

"back in high school I was confused by my feelings for you. god, y/n I was constantly thinking about you and everything you did- it was consuming me. I thought nothing could happen because you were my younger sister's best friend...so when I kissed you at that party and I felt my feelings intensify, I pushed you away because I was scared." he takes a step closer, now in arms reach from you. you watch him curiously, intently listening to vince's words.

“so I would be mean and act like that kiss meant nothing - that you meant nothing because I let my pride get in the way. I thought I couldn't get hurt if I was the one who was hurting you - that turned out to be bullshit. I hate what i've done to you and how I've acted towards you. this christmas was the first time I let myself love you the way I always have and - can you please say something here because i'm totally freaking out.”

you blink once....and then twice. you're sure your mouth is opening and closing like a fishes would, but you're not even focused on that right now. the shock confession from vince is the only thing you hear - the only thing you've ever wanted to hear from him and he just said it. you blink a third time, "why did it take so long for you to say that?"

"you had a boyfriend - you were dating my old friend and you seemed happy. I didn’t want to jeopardize your relationship by being selfish and telling you how I feel...even if seeing you with evan killed me."

you nod in understanding - it makes sense, it's starting to all makes sense. although, you still can't be too sure. if vince is telling the truth, which you're pretty positive he is just based on how distraught and flustered he looks standing here now and telling you this - but there is one lingering comment that hasn't left your mind since the christmas tree farm, one that you need clarification on. "what did you mean by the real me?"

vince sighs - not an irritated or angry sigh, but rather like he knew the question was coming. "the real you means before you needed to put your guard up around me - before I turned into a complete idiot and you turned into a stranger. I meant it in the most sincere and positive way, and the comment stemmed from my own guilt and actions...i'm so sorry, y/n. for everything."

"evan was right," you start quietly, your voice still timid. "all that hating each other stuff wasn't believable. vince i've loved you since you moved here and i've never stopped."

he exhales in visible relief at your confession and for the first time this christmas morning, vince touches you, gently taking ahold of your warm cheeks between his palms as he cradles you in his hands. his thumbs stroke your cheeks soothingly, a much needed comfort you've been needing from him. "seriously?"

you nod against him. "seriously...and i'm sorry too."

"you don't need to apologize to me." vince is interrupts you softly, the beginning stages of his usual smirk tugging at his lips. "you've never done anything wrong or unwarranted that makes me deserve your apology, okay?"

"okay." you sigh.

vince smiles and slowly, his thumb moves down your face until he's gliding over your bottom lip. it's swollen from you constantly biting it, as well it's bruised from the pressure of his kiss last night. he gently pulls your bottom lip down with the pad of his thumb and the he leans down towards you open mouth and kisses you.

your lips pops back into place as his thumb releases it, and it immediately morphs around vince's mouth to complete the perfect kiss. this kiss is different from the one last night - even from the one many years ago during 7 minutes in heaven. there's no rushing or uncertainty, and the way your lips mold together and pass over one another is nothing but magic.

you sigh pleasantly against his mouth, pulling him impossibly closer by his hoodie. you can feel vince smile against your lips, the feeling of you so desperate and pleased as you slip your hands under the bulk of his sweatshirt and run along his bare skin, is the best feeling vince has ever felt - you are the best thing vince has ever known.

"are you guys coming downstairs or what?" johns voice is teasing as he calls up the stairs, and you can practically hear the knowing smirk just through his tone.

"yeah, stop making out and lets open these damn gifts." sammy sounds farther away than her dad, like she's still sitting on the couch as she calls for you and her brother.

you and vince pull away from one another, slightly breathless but grinning. "she's your sister." you brush past him, gently poking him in the side as you pass by.

immediately, vince grabs a bowl of your wrist and pulls you back towards him. it has you squealing slightly, letting yourself be pulled back into his embrace effortlessly. "she's your best friend" vince brushes the tip of his nose along yours, giving you a soft eskimo kiss.

your face scrunches at the tickly sensation. "yeah well, your sister and my best friend is going to kill both of us if we don't go back downstairs."

vince groans and reluctantly releases you from his tight grip. after all, if sammy is irritated with you both for holding up the present opening, could you imagine how mad she'd be if vince fucked you on her bed. you giggle slightly at the thought, walking out of sammy's bedroom and back down the hallway.

just before you can make the descend back downstairs, vince pushes up behind you, wrapping an arm around your waist as he whispers in your ear. "I love you." to further his point, he kisses your cheek, sending butterflies loose through your entire body.

you will always love vince dunn.

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crescenthistory · 4 months ago

Text

in the silence, there is an us

Pairing: Paul Atreides x Reader

Summary: Throughout their lives, Paul and reader have often found themselves in each other's bed. Childish games after bedtime, late-night studying sessions, nightmares, and a burning need to not be apart.

Part of Paul's point of view can be read here: "you are my favourite silence"

Words: 7.2k

Warnings: not proofread, possibly some inaccuracies about plot details (have not watched dune in ages, i'm just obsessed with paul), best friends to lover, tension, light angst, jessica being a bit rude, reader being an orphan and of a lower social rank, duke leto's death (rip), lots of cuddles and lingering touches, fluff, the whole deal

***

The grand halls of Castle Caladan always had an eerie stillness after sunset. The select servants walked quietly, the sound of waves crashing below barely made its way through the stone walls, and the Duke and Lady Jessica kept to their quarters. For Paul and you, though, this was the perfect time to sneak past the sternness of bedtime. The day never seems long enough for young children whose eyes are still filled with stars.

“Come on!” Paul’s whisper was loud, almost too loud for sneaking around, but you didn’t think long enough to care. The thrill of the game was enough to make both of your hearts race. You were barefoot, your steps making soft thuds against the cool floor as you tiptoed through the hall toward his room.

“If we get caught—” you whispered, but Paul cut you off with a grin.

“We won’t. Besides, who can stop us?”

You rolled your eyes at his cocky confidence. He wasn’t wrong, though. You had never been good at staying still, at obeying the invisible rules set up by adults. With no living relatives to share your name, Paul was more than just a best friend – he was all you had. Him and Duke Leto, whose unwavering sense of duty made him take you in at the Castle when your parents died on a mission he orchestrated. Responsibility above all else, all the qualities he aimed at instilling in his young son. And it couldn’t hurt Paul to have a friend his own age, could it?

You slipped into his room, both of you giggling like you’d just played the best prank on his sleeping parents. His bed was huge for a 7-year-old, more space than one boy could ever need regardless of his nobility. Tonight, it was your playground, stretching for miles.

Paul scrambled up first, then turned and offered you his hand. “Bet you I can jump higher than you,” he said, a challenge clear in his eyes.

You took his hand, pulling yourself up and laughing as the two of you bounced on the mattress, trying to outdo each other in height and bravery. You weren’t worried about waking anyone. Even if Duke Leto found you – and he often did – his stern reprimands were laced with amusement.

This was not the first time the two children had snuck into each other’s rooms after dark, the activity becoming more habit than occasion. Nights like this were your shared rebellion, a refusal to let the day end just because the sun had gone down, just because Jessica had tucked Paul into bed an hour earlier for bedtime.

Eventually, after you had worn yourselves out, you collapsed side by side on the bed, your breaths heavy from laughter. You stared up at the ceiling, still giggling as the adrenaline began to fade.

“I don’t want it to be bedtime ever again,” Paul said, his voice soft, almost wistful.

You turned your head to look at him, sprawled out on the massive mattress, dark hair in his eyes that reflected the dim moonlight streaming through the window. You understood exactly what he meant.

“Me neither,” you replied with a smile. Your hand found his under the covers.

Neither of you moved as your true bedtime took over, the quiet settling in around you, comfortable and warm. You fell asleep like that, fingers intertwined, with no concept of what it meant to have boundaries. There was just Paul, and you, and the night that was never long enough.

***

In the wake of your early teens at the castle, sneaking into each other’s rooms had become less about rebellion and more about comfort. The innocence of bouncing on beds and stifled laughter gave way to whispered conversations in the dark and the shared weight of fears neither of you quite understood yet.

The first time Paul came to your room because of a nightmare, it startled you. You were just about to drift off when you heard the soft creak of your door, followed by the quiet patter of feet. You jerked up from the mess of blankets, blinking into the darkness. Confusion and perhaps a bit of fear grasped you, until you saw his silhouette standing near the edge of your bed.

“Paul?” you whispered, straightening up. “What’s wrong?”

He didn’t answer at first, he didn’t know how. With his tense expression and shadows playing across his face, he looked haunted despite his still small, boy-like frame. You knew him in and out by now, and could clearly read the signs of his nails digging into the skin of his fingers, breathing shallow and uneven.

“Can I stay?” His voice was rougher than usual, like he was barely holding it together.

“Of course.”

You didn’t ask any questions, it was a silent understanding. Instead, you lifted the blanket, making room for him. He crawled in without hesitation, laying his head on the pillow on your left. His body rigid beside yours for a moment before he relaxed, the tension slowly draining away.

Lying there, you listened to the sound of his breathing steadying, feeling the warmth of his presence next to you, arm against arm. It was quiet, but not silent – the kind of quiet that only existed when you knew someone else was there with you. Someone who understood. Someone who would never judge you for being afraid.

In his newfound safety, Paul drifted off easier than he could in his own bed. Yours was significantly smaller, but somehow softer, and he could actually feel the weight of you beside him on the mattress. He could ground himself in your presence. When he fell asleep, his head fell slightly to the side, his hair brushing against your cheek.

You, on the other hand, stayed awake a little longer, staring up at the ceiling, your thoughts racing.

You’d always been each other’s rock, but now, something was different. The comfort you found in his presence was deeper, more profound. It wasn’t just about not wanting to be alone anymore, it was about needing him specifically. It brought a smile to your face to know that he found that same assurance in you.

***

The weights on your shoulders materialised and became clearer as you grew beside each other. At sixteen, the favours Duke Leto had bestowed upon you by allowing you residence and education at Caladan felt like a debt more than a blessing. One you had to repay through excellence, through true devotion to any and all training given to you. While Paul tried to seem more lighthearted about it all, it could be felt in the air all the same. You were no longer just two children sneaking around a castle that seemed to never end. You were a future duke and a noblewoman-in-training, navigating a world that seemed to have its eyes on you at every moment.

To earn your gifted title and position and prove yourself worthy of your place as Paul’s friend, you poured over every textbook your teachers assigned you. The study of Caladan, of politics, traditions and customs occupied your mind to the extent that you neglected the occupant of your heart.

Yet, at late hours, it was always Paul’s bedroom floor the pair found themselves splayed across.

Sheets of notes, pens and books layed on top of themselves in a system neither of you could have been able to explain to an outsider. Paul against the wall with his notebook, you stomach-down on the carpet, nose buried between the words in your textbook.

“You’re going to wear yourself out.” Paul’s words were muttered, watching you through tired eyes.

You shook your head. “I’m fine. Just one more chapter.”

“You said that an hour ago.”

“I mean it this time.”

Paul didn’t argue, but you could feel his eyes on you as you worked, his presence a quiet comfort beside you. It had become routine, the two of you studying together, you claimed you worked better that way. Paul occasionally asking questions while you tried to focus on your own work but more often than not, you ended up helping him instead of yourself.

Your one-more-chapter became two more as you tried to retain the information, but your eyelids grew heavier, your focus slipping. The same sentence became burned into your retinas without making much more sense.

Ever so slowly, your head was brought closer and closer to the ink. Eventually it was all you could see before your cheek hit the page – you were out as a light.

Paul watched you for a moment, a soft smile playing on his lips. This was not the first time. He closed his own book and moved quietly to your side. He brought a finger up to brush some of your hair out of your face before he rolled you over. Gently, he lifted you, careful not to wake you as he carried you to the bed. His bed.

It had almost become part of the routine, he watches you exhaust yourself and then ensures you get the rest you deserve. He had done this before, but each time, it made his chest tighten more in ways he didn’t fully understand.

As he laid you down delicately, he hesitated by your side for just a moment, watching the rise and fall of your chest, the peaceful expression on your face. He didn’t realise how often he found himself staring at you like this, wondering when the girl who used to be his playmate had become someone he couldn’t stop thinking about. Someone he wanted to protect, to keep close, even as you worked yourself to the bone. He wanted to tell you you didn’t have to, that he knew and that you were enough. Instead, he let his instinct win and lightly caressed the soft flesh of your arm.

After a brief pause, Paul pulled the covers over you and sat on your edge of the bed for a while longer. He was tired himself, but he didn’t want to move. Not just yet.

***

The past few months felt as if they stretched on for years with how much change and development you were faced with, almost forcefully. Despite your efforts, the older you got, the more you felt like a young girl attempting to parade as a grown woman ready for whatever duties Duke Leto sees fit of you, as a “noblewoman” without any true blood given nobility.

Paul had been dancing around your worries for a while now, cutting off your worried rants with funny quips and dragging you from the library or training room to the beach when he believed you too worrisome. However, his duties were catching up to him as well, even when he tried to balance on the beam with you. He would be a duke one day, and though he had acted like a prince all his life, this was much more real.

His duties were specifically catching up to him in the form of one Lady Jessica. Reminders, comments, requests to his teachers and staff. She wanted him to start becoming the man he needs to be.

One of her lectures was playing out before your eyes in the library, though it escaped you how it even began. The soft, rhythmic drumming of the rain against the high windows felt like the one thing tethering you this world as she spoke, shadows cast across her face.

Lady Jessica’s voice sliced through the rain, calm but pointed. Leaving the air around you feeling heavy. You sat at a table beside Paul, as she stood above you, a judge passing through your reading session. Her sharp eyes, blue within blue, never seemed to miss anything.

She had always watched you carefully, ever since you were children – though it wasn’t until recently that you noticed how her gaze lingered on you. Emotion indecipherable, yet somehow your stomach seared from it. She was assessing you on criteria it felt you had no control over.

“You’re both approaching the age where things will change,” Jessica said, her gaze flicking between you and Paul. Her tone was deceptively gentle, like the calm before a storm. “You can no longer afford to be... careless.”

There was a long pause, a silence that felt charged with unspoken meaning. Paul shifted beside you, and though you didn’t look at him, you could feel the tension in the way he carried himself, alert, almost defensive.

“I’m not just speaking about duties to the House or the formalities expected of you as you come of age.” Lady Jessica’s eyes rested on you, sharp and assessing. “I’m also speaking about the way you conduct yourselves in your personal relationships.”

Your heart stuttered at the implication, warmth creeping up the back of your neck. You did not wish to dig into the meaning behind her words.

This was not the first time she’d given such a lecture, but it was the first time it felt so personal. So aimed. It was understood she must be referring to the hours upon hours you spent together, including in the moonlight. The quiet moments where you and Paul sought each other out, clinging to your comfort when the world felt too heavy to bear alone.

It was never intended to be anything inappropriate. You were each other’s safety nets, just like you had always been. But still, you felt a pang of shame coil in your chest at the thought of it being seen that way.

“You have been given responsibilities that go beyond your own desires,” Jessica continued, turning slightly toward Paul. “You are the heir to the House of Atreides, Paul. Every decision you make now, every relationship you allow to develop, can impact that legacy.”

Paul’s jaw clenched, and for the first time, you risked a glance at him. His face was unreadable, but the tension in his posture betrayed his discomfort. His eyes flicked to you, worry clouding them more than annoyance at his mother’s words. He searched your face for something, and did not seem happy with what he saw, but you ripped your gaze away a mere second after.

He was not thinking about his legacy. In that moment, all he thought about was you and how you were feeling.

Your stomach twisted, and the weight of it all – the difference in your status, the expectations that shadowed both your lives – seemed too much. Lady Jessica was not wrong, and Gods did you hate it. You glanced down, willing the words to settle somewhere far away, somewhere that wouldn’t hurt so much.

“You must understand,” Jessica said, her voice softer now, but no less firm, “the time for childish games is over. It’s time for both of you to take your roles more seriously. The future will not wait for you to be ready.”

The words hit you harder than they should have, like a reprimand for something you had not yet done but already felt guilty about. You wanted to say something, anything to show that you understood, that you weren’t some distraction pulling Paul away from his responsibilities, but the words stuck in your throat. Instead, you nodded stiffly, keeping your eyes trained on the floor.

Jessica gave a tight-lipped smile you did not see, before turning around to take her leave, pleased with the efficiency of your talk. She was gone, her robes whispering against the stone floor as she left you alone with the silence she had created between you two.

For a long moment, neither of you moved. The weight of Jessica’s words still hung heavy in the room, thickening the air between you. You could feel Paul’s gaze on you, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look up at him, not yet.

“She didn’t mean it like that,” Paul finally said, his voice low and careful, like he was testing the waters.

When you did not respond, Paul let out a soft sigh, moving his body towards you. “She’s just worried. That’s all. My mother—”

“Your mother is always worried,” you cut in, more sharply than you intended. You could feel the weight of it all pressing down on you. The constant reminders of how you didn’t quite fit into this world of nobility and politics, how your presence was tolerated but not truly embraced by the one woman you wished to be on your side. “And maybe she has a point. I’ve been distracting you. I shouldn’t... I shouldn’t keep coming to you.”

You did not elaborate, you did not need to.

Paul’s expression tightened, and before you could move away, he reached out, gently gripping your hands between his. His touch was warm, grounding, but you tried not to let yourself sink into it.

“No,” he said, his voice firm now. “You haven’t been distracting me. You’ve... you’ve been keeping me sane. It’s not the same thing.”

You swallowed hard, shaking your head again. “But your mother thinks—”

“I don’t care what my mother thinks.”

The words were out of Paul’s mouth before he could stop them, and for a moment, he looked almost startled by his own admission. He blinked, as if trying to make sense of his own boldness, before his grip on your hands tightened just slightly, his eyes locking onto yours.

“I don’t care what she thinks about the time we spend together,” he said, quieter this time, but no less intense. “She doesn’t understand. She doesn’t know what it’s like to feel like you’re drowning, like the world’s pressing in from every side, and you’re just. Alone.”

You looked up at him then, your breath catching at the rawness in his voice. Paul never let anyone see him like this—not even you most of the time, not fully. But now, there was something in his eyes that hadn’t been there before. Desperation, maybe. Or something deeper, something unspoken.

“Whenever I’m with you, it’s the only time I don’t feel that way,” he continued, his voice low, like he was sharing a secret he’d been keeping for too long. “You’re not a distraction. You’re the only thing that keeps me steady.”

Your chest tightened, torn between the overwhelming urge to believe him and the guilt that had been festering inside you since Jessica’s words. You wanted to argue, but the look in his eyes made it impossible to say any words out loud.

So instead, you swallowed your thoughts, pressing them deep down where they couldn’t be reached.

“We just need to be more careful,” you said softly, pulling your hands away from his grasp. Your skin still tingled where his fingers had been. “Your mother’s right. We can’t keep hiding away in each other’s rooms. We can’t... we can’t keep acting like kids.”

Paul’s face fell, the tension in his shoulders sagging slightly. His now-free hands went up to rub at his face before he sighed. “But we’re not acting like kids.”

“Aren’t we?” you asked, your voice barely a whisper. “We’re literally sneaking into each other’s beds in the middle of the night, Paul. We’re still pretending like nothing’s changed.”

Paul was quiet for a long moment, his eyes flicking away from you, as if he couldn’t bring himself to argue. Maybe because deep down, he knew you were right.

But then, just as the silence between you started to feel unbearable, he spoke again, his voice quieter, but full of conviction.

“Nothing has changed though. Not between us.”

The words lingered in the air, and for the first time in a long while, you didn’t know how to respond. A part of you wanted to believe him, wanted to cling to the idea that no matter what the world threw at you, no matter what Lady Jessica said, you and Paul would always be the same. The same two people who had spent years leaning on each other, who had always been there to catch each other when the ground fell away.

Yet, you knew what Paul’s wishful thinking sounded like more than anyone else. You knew everything about him. And in this moment, you knew he was wrong. No matter how much you both tried to ignore it, the future was closing in around you.

“I should go,” you said quietly, getting up from your seat before he could say or do anything to stop you. “I need to think.”

Paul didn’t say anything, but the look in his eyes was enough to keep you rooted in place for just a moment longer, looking down at him. He still looked so young, his eyes so wide. That familiar ache settled in your chest, the same ache that came whenever you thought about what you were trying so hard not to lose.

“I will see you tomorrow,” you said, and with that you left him to sit with the sound of rain drops against glass.

After Jessica’s most pointed lecture, your unease at night, the one you and Paul seemed cursed to be forever plagued by as children of the castle, had only increased. You woke in cold sweat or you did not wake at all – regardless, you stayed in your own bed, never venturing down that familiar path in the hallway. You hugged your knees for comfort.

You were a proper young woman. As you ought to be.

Nothing could get you and Paul to stop spending time with each other entirely though, not his mother and certainly not complicated feelings. There was already a lot of that flowing around anyway.

Classes, meals, walks around the hallways, the occasional silent moment watching the waves side by side in a large window. Never late-night visits. Never lingering too much, especially not around Jessica.

She seemed pleased with your development, so you bit your cheek and played the part.

It had been months since either of you crossed that invisible boundary, but the comfort of those nights lingered in your minds, a shared memory you couldn’t quite let go of. One that you held tight on rough nights.

Ironically enough, it was the nights without thunder or storms that you struggled the most. Gripped by fear and horror, you fought through the worst nightmare you had experienced in many years. Mangled bodies, fire and smoke, Paul’s face distorted by sandstorms that you swear you could feel cut into your fragile skin like class.

The scream was lodged in your throat as you shot up, finally able to pull yourself out of the depths of your consciousness of all that has happened and all you fear will. Drowning in sweat and tears, violently trembling all over, you suddenly found yourself on your feet in the cold hallway.

No coherent thoughts were running through your head, just instinct and an intense need to be saved from your own mind. Even in a waking state, you still felt half infused in the nightmare, seeing the scenes when you blink, as if tattooed on your eyelids.

Almost running down the known path, your hand grazing the wall as you went to stabilise yourself. The rational part of your brain told you it wasn’t appropriate, that you should listen to Jessica, you were both too old to be doing this – but you were not in a rational state of mind right now. Right now you were the same scared little girl you have always been, the one you fear you always will be, and you knew what you needed to do to quiet her screams.

When you reached his door, you paused, your hand hovering over the handle. What if he didn’t want this anymore? What if he would turn you away?

Before you could second-guess yourself further, the door creaked open, and there he was. Paul stood in the doorway, lit up from behind by a single candle on his nightstand. His eyes were wide as he took the sight of you in, but there was no real surprise etched on his face. However, if you weren’t mistaken, you thought you saw relief in it. Like he had been waiting for you, hoping for you to come.

Paul breathed your name out like a ‘thank you’, stepping aside to let you in before you could even speak. His hair was dishevelled, his shirt wrinkled from where he must have been lying awake, staring at the tall ceiling.

You slipped in past him, already feeling some tension leave your body as soon as the door closed behind you. You weren’t sure what to say. Maybe you didn’t need to say anything at all. Letting your eyes meet his, the look on Paul’s face told you everything you needed to know.

Without a word, you moved toward the bed, and Paul followed, his presence a warm, steadying force behind you. He didn’t ask you any questions, he didn’t need to. You both knew that whatever it was, it was enough to bring you here, to him.

You hesitated for just a moment, feeling the weight of the years between you. When you were children, there had been no second thoughts, no hesitation. But now, voices were creeping in – but you shoved them aside like his blankets, and climbed into his bed.

When Paul slid into bed beside you, everything felt right again.

The tension in your body melted away as he wrapped an arm around you, pulling you close. You could hear the steady rhythm of his breathing, feel the warmth of his skin against yours, and suddenly, the fear that had gripped you moments ago faded into nothing.

You rested your head against his chest, closing your eyes as the last of your tremors subsided. He was your anchor, your constant in a world that was rapidly spinning out of control.

“Are you okay?” Paul finally asked, his voice soft, almost a whisper.

You nodded against him, but your throat felt tight, your words stuck behind the weight of everything unsaid. The nightmare had shaken you more than you wanted to admit, and it wasn’t just about the dark images in your head. It was the fear of losing Paul, of losing the one person who had been by your side for as long as you could remember.

“I’m glad you came,” Paul said quietly. “I wanted to come to you, but—” He trailed off, his hand tightening slightly on your shoulder as if to ground himself.

“I know,” you whispered, finally finding your voice. “I wanted to come sooner.”

There was a pause, and then, after a long moment, Paul’s thumb began tracing slow circles on your arm, his touch gentle but deliberate. It was a gesture of comfort, of familiarity.

“I’ll always be here,” he murmured, so softly you almost didn’t hear him. “I swear it.”

You opened your eyes and tilted your head up, meeting his gaze in the dim light. His face was serious, his eyes reflecting the weight of the promise he’d just made. For a brief second, you thought he might say more, something you’d been waiting for but weren’t ready to confront.

Instead, Paul’s expression softened, and he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, the gesture tender, reassuring. It was something he might have done when you were younger, but now it felt different. It wasn’t just comfort anymore—it was a part of the promise.

Neither of you said anything after that. You simply held each other, letting the quiet settle in. The world outside might have been shifting, changing in ways neither of you could control, but here, in the stillness of the night, there was nothing but you and Paul.

You didn’t know when you fell asleep, only that, for the first time in a long while, you felt safe. And unfortunately, as the next few days would ensure, it was the last time for a long while as well.

***

When Arrakis claimed Duke Leto, it also claimed something inside Paul.

He wasn’t the same after that day. The boy who had been your partner in rebellion, the one who made you laugh even in the darkest of times, had hardened. His grief was silent, buried under layers of duty and survival, but you could see it. It was in the way his hands trembled ever so slightly when he thought no one was looking, the way his eyes had dulled since your arrival on this cursed planet.

In the middle of it all, you felt lost too. You had lost the closest you had to a father figure in Duke Leto, but worse, you were losing Paul—bit by bit, day by day, as he was forced to become someone you struggled to recognise. This was a different kind of nightmare, one you couldn’t wake from.

After growing used to the luxury of Caladan Castle’s beddings, you found yourself huddled with Paul in a small tent in the middle of the desert, the harsh winds of Arrakis howling outside. There was nothing but sand for miles, and for the first time since arriving on this planet, you felt truly untethered from the life you once knew.

Paul sat across from you, his back pressed against the rough fabric of the tent, his face half-shadowed by the faint light from a small glowglobe. His eyes were distant, fixed on something you couldn’t see, something only he could comprehend.

“Paul?” you whispered, your voice trembling despite your best efforts to keep it steady.

He didn’t answer at first, but then, slowly, his gaze shifted to you. There was a fragility there that caught you off guard—a vulnerability that reminded you of the boy you used to sneak around the castle with, the one who used to chase away your fears with a single glance.

Without thinking, you moved closer, kneeling in front of him. His breath hitched as you reached out, gently placing one hand on his arm and the other on his cheek. He looked down at your fingers, as if surprised by the touch, before his eyes met yours again.

You wanted to say something, anything at all, to ease his pain. To take some of the burden off his shoulders, even if that meant taking them upon your own. No words felt worthy enough and died in your throat, while the sentiment remained hot on your tongue.

With Arrakis raging around you, you wanted him to feel some sense of security.

“I’m still here,” you whispered, echoing the words he had said to you when you were the one needing the comfort.

For a moment, he just stared at you. Then, with a twitch of his lips, something cracked in his expression, something that had been carefully held in place to keep it all in. Paul’s shoulders sagged, the weight of loss and doom pressing down on him all at once.

He didn’t say anything, but when you shifted closer and pulled him into your arms, he didn’t resist. He simply let you hold him, his head resting against your shoulder, his breath shaky and uneven.

You sat like that for a long time, wrapped in each other’s presence as the storm outside raged on. The world around you was crumbling, but here, in the faux quiet of the tent, there was nothing but the two of you. You didn’t have words for what you were feeling, but it didn’t matter. Paul understood. He always had.

As if the continued touch broke him, Paul made a sound like a tear-less sob, saving water while still drowning in emotion. His arms tightened around you, holding onto you for dear life.

He murmured something against your neck that you couldn’t hear. You made an inquisitive humming sound as you began to stroke his back, coaxing him through his pain.

“I can’t lose you,” he whispered. His voice was raw, it sent ripples through your heart. “Please.”

“You won’t,” you promised, your fingers moving up to card through his hair. “I’m not going anywhere, Paul. I’ll be right here with you.”

If he wanted to answer, he couldn’t. Instead he let himself have this moment before facing a world that seemed increasingly too big.

***

Life among the Fremen was harsh, unforgiving, but the two of you had learned to survive. It had been weeks since you arrived in the sietch, and every day felt like a battle—against the elements, against the constant threat of danger, against the growing distance between you and the boy you grew up with.

The desert night was deceptively cool, the air carrying a sharpness that contrasted with the oppressive heat of the day. You stood just outside the sietch, gazing up at the unfamiliar stars that stretched endlessly above the dunes. The sky was clear—almost too clear—so different from the comforting overcast of Caladan, the gentle crash of waves a memory long lost to the wind. You inhaled deeply, trying to ground yourself, but the vastness of the desert made you feel small. Disconnected.

There were few quiet moments here, and you took a deep breath as you were surrounded by it.

“I thought I’d find you here.”

There was a shuffle of footsteps behind you, soft but deliberate. Without turning, you of course knew it was Paul. He came up behind you, standing slightly to your left so you could see him in your sideview. You leaned back, resting your shoulder on his own.

You smiled faintly, though it didn’t quite reach your eyes. “Couldn’t sleep.”

Paul laughed lowly – some things never change. “Neither could I.”

You shook your head, still staring at the stars. “I don’t know if I’ve had a proper night’s sleep since we left Caladan.”

“I miss the rain,” Paul said quietly. “I never thought I would. I used to complain about it when we were kids.”

You smiled faintly. “Don’t lie, you hated being inside when it rained. You’d drag me out into the mud even when it was pouring.”

He let out a soft chuckle. “Well, you never said no.”

“I never could.”

There was a pause, one that carried the weight of the past few months – Arrakis, the loss of Duke Leto, the constant struggle for survival. The two of you had grown so used to moving, fighting, planning for the next step, that there had been no time to sit with your grief. No time to just be, in the way you only can with each other.

“It’s strange, isn’t it?” Paul murmured, glancing at you sideways. “How quickly everything changes. A few months ago, we were on Caladan, complaining about studies, sneaking into each other’s rooms like we always used to... and now–”

“We’re here,” you finished for him, your voice quieter. “In the middle of the desert.”

Paul’s eyes lingered on you for a moment, and you felt the weight of his gaze. You’d been through so much together, seen so much of each other, in ways no one else had. Yet there was still a distance between you now, a hesitation that hadn’t been there when you were younger.

It was as though you both knew you were standing on the edge of something, but neither of you dared to cross it.

“I was thinking...” Paul started, his voice trailing off. He looked away, frowning slightly as if choosing his words carefully. “Would it be... strange if you stayed with me tonight? Just for comfort, I mean.”

Your heart skipped, somehow caught off guard by the question. There had been so many nights, both as children and as teenagers, where you had found solace in each other’s company. Whether from nightmares, from stress, or simply because being apart felt wrong.

“Not strange, anyone would need a bit of comfort in our situation,” you tried at humour before looking back at him with soft eyes.

He didn’t say anything, seemingly trapped between his thoughts. Usually when you spend the night together lately it was because of difficult emotions. You open the door for him to talk about his feelings.

“Are you– are you okay?” you asked, searching his face for the answer.

Paul was always the one holding everything together, always taking on the weight of his responsibilities without complaint. But tonight, standing under the cold desert sky, he seemed tired. Tired in a way that went beyond just sleepless nights.

He didn’t respond right away. Instead, he looked out over the dunes, his expression unreadable, though the subtle tightening of his jaw told you he was wrestling with something.

“I’ve been thinking about my father,” he finally said, his voice thick with the grief he rarely let slip. “About everything he wanted for me. For us. How he wanted me to be a ruler who led with compassion, but how can I...?” He trailed off, swallowing hard, and you could see the battle raging behind his eyes.“I don’t know if I can be what he wanted.”

Your heart ached at his words. You had always known Paul felt the weight of his future, but you hadn’t realised how deeply it cut. Stepping closer, you touched his arm lightly, drawing his attention back to you.

“You already are,” you said softly. “Even in the middle of all this, Paul, you haven’t lost that part of yourself. Your father would see that.”

He exhaled shakily, meeting your gaze, and for a moment, it felt like the world fell away. There was a vulnerability there, one he rarely let show. It made something inside you shift, as though the careful lines you had mentally drawn to protect yourself, to keep things unchanged between you, were suddenly blurring.

“I’m just afraid of losing more,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “Of losing everyone I care about. Losing you.”

The words settled heavily in the space between you, a truth that had always lingered but was now undeniable. You were no longer just childhood friends. You were no longer just companions trying to survive. There was a throne in your heart, and on it, Paul was more than just a duke.

“You won’t lose me,” you said firmly, turning towards him and stepping even closer. “You couldn’t. I’m here, Paul, I’ve always been here.”

Paul stared at you, his expression shifting into something you couldn’t quite place. His eyes softened, the hard edges that had been carved into him by grief and duty melting away, if only for a moment. There was something unspoken in the way he looked at you now, something that had been building for years but had never quite been said aloud.

“You don’t understand,” Paul whispered, his voice rough with emotion. “I can’t lose you. Not just because you’re the last piece of Caladan I have left... but because I—”

He stopped, his throat working as if the words were too hard to say. But you knew what he meant. You’d always known, hadn’t you?

Paul took a step closer, the last step separating his body from yours. His hand lifted to brush a strand of hair behind your ear, the touch sending a shiver down your spine. His fingers lingered at the base of your neck, and you were sure he could feel the rapid beat of your heart in your pulsepoint. It echoed the weight of what he wasn’t saying.

“You can say it,” you whispered, your voice trembling, though you weren’t sure if it was from fear or anticipation.

Paul’s breath hitched, and for a moment, he looked like he was on the verge of stepping back, of retreating into that familiar space where he could hide from the truth. But then his palm made contact with the side of your neck, and he leaned in closer, his forehead resting against yours. Breathing in deeply, slowly.

“I love you,” he whispered, the words tumbling out like a secret he had been holding onto for too long. “I have loved you for so long, and I didn’t even realise it. But now, I can’t stop thinking about it. About you.”

Your heart stuttered at the confession, your breath catching in your throat. It wasn’t a declaration shouted from the rooftops, it wasn’t a grand, romantic gesture. It was quiet, real, the kind of love that had grown slowly over years, woven into every shared moment, every laugh, every late-night conversation.

“And I love you,” you whispered back, the words barely audible in the quiet of the desert night. “You’re my best friend, my person. You must know that.”

Paul let out a soft, almost relieved breath, his hand moving up to cup your cheek as he tilted your face up to meet his. There was a question in his eyes, one he didn’t need to ask. You answered it by leaning in, lips barely brushing against his, before he closed the final gap with the gentlest of kisses. He was tentative, as though testing the waters of something new, something fragile but real.

It was a kiss that felt like a promise.

It lingered, even when he pulled back ever so slowly, resting his forehead back against yours.

You both stood there in the quiet, the weight of the desert and the night around you, but the tension between you finally dissipating through your touches.

“Will you stay with me tonight?” Paul whispered again, his voice steady this time, though the vulnerability was still there, just beneath the surface.

“I will stay with you every night, if that would make you happy.” There was no hesitation in your voice or your heart. Just love.

A smile spread on his face before he pressed it against your lips in another kiss. Searing, caring, passionate. This was the closest you have seen him to his old boyish self, always happy to bask in your presence.

Letting his hand travel down to find yours, he interlaced your fingers and pulled you back into the sietch.

His room was small, barely big enough for the both of you, a stark contrast to your conditions at Caladan. But as you lay down beside each other, it didn’t matter, you were glad for the excuse to keep him even closer. Paul wrapped his arms around you, holding you tightly, and for the first time since Arrakis had stolen everything from you, you felt safe. Safe in the knowledge that whatever came next, whatever trials the desert or the universe had in store, you wouldn’t face them alone.

As you lay in his arms, your head resting against his chest, you whispered, “We’ll get through this, Paul. Together.”

Paul’s grip tightened around you, and you could hear the steady beat of his heart beneath your ear.

“We will,” he murmured, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you. Not ever.”

“And I you. No matter what, my love.”

Warmth spread across Paul’s face at the name. He thought, with sleep beginning to cloud his mind, that though there are many uncomfortable changes – that is one he will happily accept.

For the first time in weeks, you both fell asleep easily, wrapped in the comfort of each other, and the quiet promise of the love that had finally, after all these years, been released into dry air.

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