#it reminds me of a lamp my gram had

[rubenesque-as-fuck]

Extremely pleased with the excellent ambiance of my new little fountain 😊

[today-only-happens-once]

Boy Band AU is Romantic LAMP (eventually)

Or, I was thinking about the boy band au and was like, y’know what? Could be gayer.

warnings: cursing, kissing, some miscommunication and angst, mentions of/fear of resentment and divorce, running away from problems as an anxiety response, getting together, happy endgame romantic lamp stuff tho

This got so long I’m so sorry, y’all. It started as just “listing fun facts about it” and evolved into a bulletfic. Woops. 

It doesn’t happen right away. In fact, it’s... a very long, slow process for them all getting together. Years down the road, actually.

They all have moments of Gay Panic when it comes to the others throughout those years, but... especially at first, none of them are really feel like they’re in a good place to enter any kind of committed romantic relationship.

And since those feelings don’t really develop strongly and complexly until later on in their lives, they fortunately already know about polyam people--though at first, none of them know that the others are also that way.

So there’s several years of sort of figuring themselves out and learning about one another in a tight-knit-friendship kind of way, and then a few more years of romantic pining and uncertainty before they figure it out haha

It’s seven years into their band career that Grandma Foster places a bet against Remy on who confesses first. Grandma Foster’s money is on Roman. Remy’s money is on Patton. 

It’s ten years from meeting each other, within the month, that the ice finally breaks. And when it does, they’re both wrong. Logan confesses first. 

though the confession happens within, like, minutes of each other. Because well--

Logan had started acting weird. And weird like, distant? And it was bothering all of them, but any time one of them tried to talk to him about it, Logan just pretended like he didn’t understand where they were getting that from. 

And eventually, they all corner him (figuratively, but kind of literally too because Logan is chilling on the couch when they talk to him) and Virgil is like “cut the bullshit, Logan” 

And it’s a long, messy conversation between all of them. Because turns out, Logan does cut the bullshit, and confesses to feeling attracted to all three of them, and he doesn’t want to make them uncomfortable and he definitely doesn’t want to lose them. and if they don’t like him back, that’s fine, honestly, he’s sure the feelings will fade (which Logan thinks might be a lie, he’s not sure, but... the alternative is losing them, and Logan doesn’t think he could handle that)

Roman confesses next. It’s like opening the floodgates of his feelings and he waxes poetic about all of them but he says it so earnestly, how he’s known he’s loved them all for years, and think he’s loved them all for a lot longer than even he realizes--

Patton is next. How Logan couldn’t possibly get rid of him that easily, not when he loves them all too and yes, yes in that way, hadn’t it been obvious?

Virgil, though... Virgil freezes. 

Because yes, yes of course he has these feelings for them all. But suddenly it feels like everything is changing, all at once, and Virgil knows he should feel relieved and happy because they feel the same way about him that he feels about them but all he actually feels is fear. Because Virgil doesn’t do well with Big Sudden Change and this feels like a Very Big and Very Sudden Change. 

On top of that, in the back of his mind, is Virgil’s parents and how they used to talk about how in love they were with each other once upon a time and somehow, along the way, that dissolved into fighting and arguments and divorce and resentment--

So Virgil bolts. Not quite literally, but close to it. He stammers out a “I-I need some air” and grabs his keys and wallet and leaves and tries not to feel the weight of their gazes on his back. He pretends he doesn’t hear Roman say his name when he closes the door behind him.

Virgil drives. He doesn’t really know where he’s going, he’s just going. By the time he’s done, he’s at the coast. He leaves his shoes and socks in the car, trying to ignore the churning in his stomach. He does have enough wherewithal to text the other boys a quick message ( “sorry. went to the coast. just need to think”) and tosses his phone in the backseat before the sense of guilt crushes him completely. 

He walks to the shoreline. The sun is setting at this point and the feeling of the sand under his feet and between his toes, plus the cool waves lapping at his ankles, helps ground him enough that his breathing doesn’t feel quite so tight anymore. 

He’s not sure how long he’s standing there, looking out at the horizon line, but he figures it must be a couple hours because he hears footsteps stepping up behind him and when he looks over his shoulder (expecting maybe Patton or Logan or Roman or all three), he’s surprised to find it’s Remy.

It’s almost 8 in the evening, so Virgil arcs an eyebrow at the iced coffee in his hands, but says nothing about. Remy stands beside him, also without shoes/socks, and stares out at the horizon line with him for a long moment before he says anything.

when he does, all remy says is, “wanna talk about it?”

Virgil just shoves his hands into the pockets of his hoodie. “how much do you know?”

A sip of coffee. “Not much. They’re worried. Wanted me to check up on you. Logan said something about ‘respecting your need for space’ but Roman said something about ‘walking into the ocean’. He was hard to hear in the background.” 

Despite himself, Virgil snorts and glances down at the water lapping at his ankles. “Only a few feet.”

Remy’s mouth quirks. “So. Do you wanna talk about it, babe, or should I just tell the boys that you’re all right and you’ll go back when you’re ready?”

And Virgil takes a deep breath that shakes a lot on the exhale, and finds himself explaining everything. About how he feels about them, how they said they feel about him, about his parents, about how everything changes and he just wasn’t ready for it and he as much as the love is present he’s afraid--he’s so afraid--that will change down the road. 

And Remy just stands there and listens. When Virgil sits down, still talking, Remy stays standing for a moment before sitting beside him. Virgil talks until the sky is mostly dark. 

When he’s done, there’s a long stretch of silence. And then all Remy asks is “have you told this--any of it--to them?” 

Which, no. He hasn’t.

“Why?”

Virgil isn’t sure. At first, it had just been sudden and overwhelming and he needed a break from the suddenness of it all, so he left. It wasn’t until the drive and staring out into the ocean getting his breathing under control that Virgil was able to sift through the minefield of his fears and thoughts. 

Remy sighs, taking his sunglasses off now that the sky was practically nightfall--only the faintest traces of dusk still kiss the horizon line--and watches the waves roll in. “Free advice is worth what you pay for,” he begins.

“That’s what Gram always says.”

“Yeah, well. She’s a smart lady.” He takes another sip of mostly-melted iced coffee. “Look, Virgil. Are you your parents? Or, for that matter, are Roman, Logan, and Patton your parents?”

“No. Thank God.”

Remy gives him a pointed look. 

“Oh.”

Remy shrugs. “Look, your relationship to those boys is whatever you want it to be. I’ve known you all for the past ten years, and I’ve been watching the way you four care for and about one another evolve. It’s become an ingrained part of who you all are as a unit. I don’t think that’s liable to change, romantic relationship or not.” 

“But--”

“And,” Remy adds pointedly, “if you want a relationship with them, and you don’t go for it because you’re afraid it will end badly... well. It sounds like you’re ending it before it’s even given a chance.” 

And, well, Virgil finds that maybe Remy has a point. The two of them sit together a bit longer, and Virgil is pretty sure it’s just Remy’s way of making absolutely sure Virgil is really, actually okay, before he gets up and leaves. 

Virgil leaves only a minute or so after Remy does. He jumps in his car, checks his phone (and tries not to wince at the missed calls from all three of them) and sees a text from Logan sent through the group text that signals to Virgil it’s probably a message from all three of them. 

It’s relatively long--unusual for Logan texts--apologizing if they overwhelmed him, a heads up that they’ve sent Remy to check on him and they understand if he wants space, reassurance that he doesn’t have to be part of their romantic relationship if he doesn’t want to and that nothing has to change (that note about change is repeated a couple of times in the paragraph of text and Virgil is reminded of how well the boys know him at this point) for Virgil if he doesn’t want it to.

Virgil feels a little bad but he’d really rather have this conversation face-to-face (er... really, his anxiety would rather do it over text, but he feels like he owes it to the other three to talk about it in-person) so he just texts back “on my way back”. 

When he gets back, they’re all still awake. Patton is in his cat onesie, Roman in PJs (with his head in Patton’s lap, and if that doesn’t make Virgil’s chest warm with unexpected affection), and Logan still wearing what he had been when Virgil left, pacing in front of the TV. 

They all look up and freeze when Virgil steps through the door and Virgil closes it behind him, kind rubbing the back of his neck and is like “guys... I’m sorry for freaking out--”

which Logan immediately jumps in with “it’s completely understandable. A lot was happening in that conversation, a lot of things probably percieved to be changing--”

“I still shouldn’t have left,” Virgil says firmly. “That was unfair to you all. I was... It was a lot, yeah, but... I should have explained more before leaving. But... I... I can explain now, if you all... have a moment?” 

They all nod, and so Virgil stammers through his conversation with Remy, if slightly more coherent this time because he’d already spilled it all from his mind once today. And he ends with what Remy had said before he left, about how none of them are his parents, and while he’s still worried and afraid of what kind of end they could all conceivably reach, it’s also not fair to not give the four of them a chance. 

So... that’s how they all become official! Also, Logan kisses Virgil first. 

Boy Band AU Taglist: @virgil-is-the-moodiest-mood, @withspaces, @iampengwing, @thecatchat, @northern-borealis, @panicatthebiggestpartyofthefall, @trans-demon-king, @sapph-writes-sanders, @flamingfawkes, @andreaissy, @legalitiesiwthabiscuit, @h-m-t-w-n, @i-didnt-say-liar-i-said-lawyer, @hazbin-hotel-has-my-soul, @nerdleafeon, @wynniwirt, @creativenostalgiastuff

[ineffable-bisexual]

Imprinted: An Epilogue

For everyone wondering what happened to James, the duckling (first part here)

The peeping from the lavatory was getting louder and Aziraphale, after having read the same sentence three times, put down his book and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Why won’t he stop?” he groaned.

“You put him in there by himself and shut the door,” Crowley explained. He was lying on the sofa with his head in Aziraphale’s lap and scrolling on his phone.

“You’re the one that told me to fill up the tub so he can swim and feel at home. He hasn’t stopped crying!”

“Maybe he’s hungry again.”

“Stop feeding him, Crowley. He’s going to burst.”

“Ducks eat all the time.” He sat up and walked toward the kitchen. “Here. I’ll give him another cracker.”

“There are no more crackers,” Aziraphale reminded him. “He ate them.”

“Why don’t you let him walk around, then?” Crowley asked. “He’s probably bored.”

There was a loud flapping noise and the sound of webbed feet splashing about, and Aziraphale sighed. 

“Fine, go get him, then.”

Crowley grinned as he opened the bathroom door. “Hallo, James!” he greeted him. 

The duckling flapped his wings again.

“What’s all the noise, eh? Don’t you like to swim? Trust us to adopt a duck that doesn’t like water.”

“We have not adopted him!” Aziraphale shouted from the sofa.

“Don’t listen to your mother.”

The flat was now silent and he picked up his book. He continued to read but stopped when he heard the sound of the water sloshing around again and the sound of what seemed to be happy duckling noises.

“Crowley?”

No answer. 

He left his book and peeked into the bathroom.

“What...on earth?” he asked.

Crowley had stripped down to his boxers and was now sitting in the water. James was quite excited about it as he swam in fast circles around him.

“See?” the demon said. “He’s just lonely.” He looked up to find Aziraphale gone. “Angel?”

He shrugged when he got no reply. “Who needs him, eh?” he asked James, who was still circling him. “You’re a fast one!”

“Oh, Crowley.”

He looked up to find that Aziraphale was back in the door and had his mobile aimed at him. The camera shutter sound effect was going off over and over again. 

“Hey, wait a minute!” Crowley yelled. 

“This is the most adorable thing ever,” Aziraphale said through his giggles.

“I am not adorable! I’m a demon!”

James suddenly swam up to him and hopped onto his shoulder.

Aziraphale couldn’t stop the noise that came from him. “Ohhhhhh, now that is too precious!!”

“Stop taking pictures!” 

“Fix your hair a bit, dear.”

“Bloody heavens, I never should have taught you how to use that bloody camera feature!”

“This is going to The Gram.”

“Don’t you dare, and stop calling it ‘The Gram!’“

Later that night, lying in Aziraphale’s bed, Crowley was reading the many text messages he received from The Them, Madame Tracy, and Anathema. He shook his head at every last snarky one of them.

“I want a divorce,” he muttered.

Aziraphale tutted. “We’re not even married yet.”

“Fine, I’ll marry you and then we’ll get a divorce.”

“What if I don’t agree?”

Crowley was silent as he pursed his lips. He put down his phone and looked at him. “Then I’ll run off and I’ll get full custody of James.”

Aziraphale giggled softly.

He took off his reading glasses and looked down at the tiny yellow duckling that had settled between them.

“You know he has to go back to the park tomorrow.”

Crowley slumped onto his pillow and looked up at the ceiling.

“Yeah...” he mumbled. “What if we can’t find his mother?”

“Well,” Aziraphale said as he laid down. “Maybe we can stick him with another duck family.”

Crowley sighed and turned of his lamp. “Yeah,” he said again.

“Darling.”

“Good night, angel.”

--------------------

“Where are they?” Crowley asked.

They were at the pond and scanning the banks for duck families, but no such luck. 

He held James close to him as they walked.

“Surely, they haven’t migrated.”

“Oh, dear,” Aziraphale said. “They’re too young to fly right now. Let’s just keep walking.”

They did so until they reached their usual bench again and sat down. 

James settled in Crowley’s lap and Aziraphale looked down at him and stroked his head.

“Are you cross with me?” he asked Crowley.

He shook his head. “Nah, angel. He doesn’t belong in a flat. Or in a book shop.”

“You always had a soft spot for young ones, my love,” Aziraphale told him. “I know that’s something you may not want to hear, but--”

“No, you’re right.” He gave James light scratches on his back. “I just hope we--”

He was interrupted by a loud quack and they looked down to see a white duck with seven other yellow ducklings.

The duck quacked again and James jumped in Crowley’s lap and flapped his tiny wings.

“Is this your mummy, then?” he asked, with small grin. “Off you go, James.”

He gently set him on the ground and James eagerly ran to his family. The other ducklings peeped loudly as they walked away. 

The two watched as they trotted to the bank of the pond and jumped into the water.

Aziraphale felt Crowley’s hand grasp his and he smiled as he squeezed it.

“We did a good thing, dear,” he said.

“I know...” Crowley replied, his voice tight.

They sat for another moment to watch them swim until Crowley rose from the bench, gently tugging Aziraphale’s hand.

“Lunch?”

“Yes, that’s a good idea.”

They walked hand in hand back to the Bentley and Crowley took one last look back at the pond before saying, “I spotted a new curry place on the way here.”

“Oh, marvelous! Let’s try it.”

[firelxdykatara]

“It works when I’m... not angry.”

that’s something else that i find really interesting about the array of powers here! in the original show, the powers fit the girls who got them. prue was very type a, bossy, needed to be in control of her own life, the leader, and so she got the most physical of the starting powers, the ability to literally move things with her mind. this is a power that surfaced with her anger. piper was the people pleaser, the mollifier, the peacekeeper, the one who wanted everyone to get along and just wanted to keep her family together, and she was also the most afraid, initially, of the realities that came with being a witch--so she got the power to freeze time (on a smaller scale than mel, at the beginning), for which her panic and anxiety was a major trigger. as for phoebe, she was the heart of the show from the start--bold and reckless and a little bit wild, but also the one most likely to wear her heart on her sleeve, to be open about what she felt and to reach out to others and want to help them, regardless of the consequences (a trait that, if memory serves, got her and her sisters in trouble on more than one occasion--and also saved their lives multiple times). so phoebe was gifted the power of premonition--she could literally see people who were in danger, who needed her help, and she was the one who could rally her sisters and help save the day.

it seems to me that they’re going a little... opposites attract, with the new charmed ones’ powers. mel, who is so angry all the time--because of her mother’s death, but also because of the sheer injustice of the world in which she lives--has a power that is hampered by that anger. she can’t use it when she’s pissed, because her power is primarily meant to diffuse situations, not escalate them. while, powers-wise, she’s clearly meant to be the piper of the family, i think she more aligns with prue, and it’s interesting because i don’t think prue would have fared much better with piper’s power than mel is managing right now. maggie, on the other hand, is the clear phoebe analogue--she’s the baby of the family, she’s the bold one, determined to live her own life, and who chafes under her sister’s need for control (something that pushed phoebe herself out of the halliwell manor and all the way across the country before gram���s death brought her back), and she was given the power of telepathy.

it’s interesting, because this, too, seems... almost at odds with her personality thus-far--somewhat self-absorbed, though not without reason, but because she’s been so focused on trying to find her own path, her own place in the world where she won’t have to suffer the constant reminders that her sister has never stopped thinking about what if my selfish little sister had just answered her fucking phone that night, that she hasn’t taken much time to really see the people around her, to see if they’re people she even wants to fit in with in the first place... until she’s literally forced into their heads as her telepathy slowly begins to surface (and seeing her learn to control that will be interesting moving forward).

macy is somewhat harder to parse, because she hasn’t gotten as much focus in the episode, and she is also new to the family in general. unlike phoebe, who had a mountain of baggage to unload with both of her sisters in the original show, macy’s whole deal right now is that there isn’t any baggage--which is, in itself, a burden all its own. because i get the feeling that all her life, she’s longed for a family, for a sense of belonging her father just couldn’t give her--and now she’s found out that the mother she spent her life believing was dead had been alive all long... and yet she missed out on knowing her because she just happened to die right when macy moved to town. and yet she has two whole sisters she never knew about... but she’s a stranger to them. i think that she’s going to have a seasonal arc of uncertainty, of insecurity, because how can she really say she belongs when she constantly feels like a third wheel?

i think she’s going to eventually find her place with the sisters, and while her situation--being a half-sister the others never knew existed--mirrors paige, i find her most similar to piper, and it makes her being the one with telekinesis even more interesting. because macy? she does not like things she can’t explain. she threw a lamp at a man with her mind, watched him catch it without looking and then disappear without a trace, and she still tried to reason that there must be some ‘scientific’ explanation for it all. she used sodium bicarbonate to perform a demon exorcism. she needs things to make sense. she also seems to have some of piper’s peacekeeping tendency, partly from ‘i’m a neutral party here’ because she is so new to the family, and partly because she doesn’t want to make waves--she just wants to belong. and yet she’s the one with the most physical ability--the one who can move things with her mind, knock a bitch off his feet if she so chose, who would probably be the most use in a fight... but is the least inclined to actually seek fights out. (unlike prue, who may as well have had ‘confrontational’ be her middle name--and i say that with all the love that i possess in my heart.)

.... good god i’m thirty minutes into the pilot and already writing novels of meta. this bodes well.

[sher-soc-the-famder]

Been thinking about a platonic LAMP soulmates AU lately, the type where when you meet a possible soulmate a mark appears that represents your relationship with them. The larger and more colorful the mark, the more important and impactful on your life they are. Soulmates can be platonic or romantic, but most people assume or hope for a romantic soulmate.

I just can’t decide if I want it to be a multichaptered fic, a long oneshot, or a shorter oneshot. But like!! (also help what is consistent tense)

Logan and Roman have known each other since elementary school. Roman’s first memory of Logan is being told that his drawing of a dog with wings was wrong “‘cause dogs don’t have wings.” Logan’s first memory of Roman is Roman picking up the nearest handful of play-doh and rubbing it into his hair in revenge

To say they had a rough start would be an understatement

The next couple of years they butted heads over every little thing, turned anything they did into a competition, and over all trying to prove to the other that they were the best. Roman excelled in the arts and sports. Logan completely crushed him when it came to academics

They didn’t truly click until the start of middle school. Roman got into a fight with some bullies because he was going to beat Logan fairly how dare you!! Logan found Roman reading The Odyssey and ended up in a friendly (if heated) discussion on the different forms of epic poetry

Nobody quite understood their friendship, seeing as it was composed of insults, competitions, and banter, but it worked for them.

“Gorgon” “Hellion, and you need to carry the x here, yes just like that” “Wait what were we on?” “I” “Imbecile?” “Juvenile”

Logan helped Roman with his homework without making Roman feel like an idiot or less for not understanding it. Roman helped Logan understand people and more often than not ended up at the principal's office fighting off Logan’s bullies.

(The bullies stopped by high school, but Roman still bristled at any perceived slight against his best friend)

Because best friends they became. If you wanted to find Logan, you looked from Roman and vice versa. Attached at the hips. Logan and Roman became Logan-and-Roman. You couldn’t get one without the other. Every sports game had a nerd reading in the back and every debate event had a theatre kid scrolling through his phone in the corner

So it was no surprise to anyone when the Marks appeared their freshman years, startlingly bright, covering Logan’s entire left arm and Roman’s right

A bright rainbow dragon curled around Logan’s arm, almost neon in its coloring. A bright golden crown adorned his shoulder, the dragon’s tail wrapping around it and leading down to the head that rested on the back of Logan’s hand, mouth opening up into bright red flames that wrapped around Logan's palm

Roman's arm portrayed a pouncing sphynx in brilliant blues and golds, reaching up towards an aurora against the night sky of dark purple and deep greens, the tail curling around his wrist and wings stretching wide and around his biceps until they met at the very tips

What no one expected was for Logan to start stubbornly wearing long sleeves, or Roman to start doodling on his other arm as if he could pretend that his new Mark could be disguised as simple art done in boredom

“I simply don’t see the point of society putting an emphasis on something that makes no sense. How is my body supposed to know if someone is going to be important to me in the future? How does the color pigment appear? And don’t get me started on the placements and the images, the emphasis on symbolism is simply absurd-”

“It’s restrictive!! So what if I have a Mark now?! It doesn’t change my relationship with Specs in the slightest! Not to mention the expectations over the years and the paperwork and all of the work work work work work. I don’t need a stupid tattoo to tell me who my best friend is!! I know it just fine by myself! None of the other gays will even look at me now it’s a CRIME-”

"And it doesn't match your aesthetic-" "IT DOESN'T MATCH MY LOOK IN THE SLIGHTEST!"

Roman gets Logan fingerless gloves for christmas. Logan gets Roman a bulk sized pack of color pens

They often get asked if they’re dating, to which the answer is no. One kids accused them of fucking and Logan couldn’t help but “Roman I would have put my book down if you had told me!” but the questions never seem to stop

Roman’s absolutely sick of it. Logan would please like to return to studying in peace.

AND THEN THERE’S MOXIETY

Patton and Virgil have known each other forever; Patton can’t remember a time that he didn’t know Virgil and adored him and followed him around like a lost puppy (or so he’s been told!) All Virgil remembers is a kind boy with a toothy grin offering to share the sandbox with him

Stuff of legends clearly

Patton was considered nice but weird in elementary school but it was alright!! He had a best friend already!! Virgil may have been quiet but he was super nice!! They colored together and Virgil made the coolest things!

Virgil had a friend. That meant he didn’t have to try to approach any of the other kids. Patton already did that for them. And yeah, they thought the two of them were a little weird but at least they didn’t pick on either of them

Patton followed Virgil and Virgil followed Patton. They had a couple of people they could spend time with but no one that they’d really classify as friends other than each other.

To be fair, no one else seemed to be able to read their moods like each other, or put up with Patton’s excited squeals, or Virgil’s constant need for reassurance, or the contrast of Patton being too excited and Virgil not caring in the slightest so long as Patton was happy

Patton was content with watching Virgil draw and pet dogs with his free time. Virgil made sure that he took care of himself! And Patton made sure Virgil smiled every once and awhile! It was nice!

Even if Virgil never quite believed him when Patton said that he wasn’t going anywhere! He wasn’t! Virgil was his best friend! Even when everyone else was talking about love and stuff!

Patton loved people! He just.. didn’t get what they meant about butterflies in his stomach or wanting to kiss someone! Well, he kissed Virgil on the forehead but Patton had a feeling that wasn’t what they were talking about. Virgil didn’t ask him about crushes or love or things like that, it made Patton feel warm and fuzzy inside

So the Marks were just like!! Making things official! Patton loved the way that it made Virgil relax, just a little bit, even if people started asking if they were dating

Patton talked his Gram-gram into getting an entire wardrobe of various backless shirts so that he could show off his Mark. The wolf that curled around a moon on the center of his back was awesome! Different shades of purple and silvers that practically glowed and Patton wanted everyone to see it

Virgil kept the blue panther that curled around his heart, front paws crossed over it like it wanted to protect him, close and private. The gradient of sky blue to black comforted him on bad days and the tail that swung around his waist felt like an eternal hug.The perfect reminder that Patton was never going to leave him.

At least when they moved to a new town and a new high school Patton and Virgil got to stick together, even if the new surge of questions about their relationship got annoying. Not that it would stop Patton from flopping into Virgil’s lap every chance he got.

Cuddles were the best!!

Patton meets Roman after school waiting for Virgil to finish talking to a teach about joining the art club and the two hit it off almost immediately

Logan runs into Virgil at the library, the later having accidentally taken Logan’s usual spot to study and the two end up sharing the space in comfortable silence

Roman bursting into Logan’s room asking for gloves to borrow to cover the new Mark on his left arm meant that Roman caught Logan looking for a turtleneck to cover the mark along his back and neck

Meanwhile Patton finds himself with the task of trying to talk the two around to the idea that having some Marks wasn’t a bad thing, or at least to help him convince Virgil that it didn’t mean they hated the anxious young man

At least High School wouldn’t be boring anymore?

And IDK that’s what I’ve got so far :p

[scorpio-karma]

More TVD Bullshit: 4x06 Edition

I'm continuing my re-watch of certain episodes in S4 to basically remember (and understand) more about Bonnie, Expression and the whole story around it. My method right now is basically rewatch the episodes with Shane in them since he's the catalyst for the Expression SL. Anyways after the rude awakening that was episode 4, and my ability to get through episode 5 with less ranty moments so I thought I was prepared to get through episode 6 — I'll save you the time, no I wasn't. 

So in a twist of events the character that I hated the most was Stefan, and Caroline, who was actually barely in the episode, was a close second. With an episode that drives home that message of "Elena and only Elena matters" I would have thought that I'd hate her the most or at least Damon for being the one to drive that message, but no, it's Caroline and Stefan with how they got the hybrid Chris killed as his reward for helping them — and for who? Elena who I find in no way more worthy of life than him. Sure he was a character barely there for literally one episode, but it just points out the blaring issue of the special treatment Elena gets within the narrative of the show. However before I really start in on that I'm going to talk about the events that led up to this.

So before I even started the episode I found myself annoyed by the recap of episode 5. Elena get all weepy about killing Connor (vampire hunter) and immediately blames Damon for it. Now I’m not usually one to defend Damon -- he does a lot of bad shit with little rhyme or reason and I don’t have time for that kind of nonsense -- but the scene where she kills him it’s very clear why she killed him and they’re reason is personal to her, Jeremy. Damon was actually nowhere near that her mind, “stay away from my brother” neck snap, sounds very much like a vampire Elena with heightened emotions would do. Things like this are the reason why I don’t believe her turning into a vampire changed her personality -- it just heightened all the annoying qualities about her because as shown in earlier seasons she has no qualms with people dying as long as they aren’t her friends. Anyways this is literally the extent of my annoyance with her this episode which a miracle in itself. Instead we get a nice look into her brain and find out she is actually as self centered as she comes off. Unfortunately it’s under the guise of lamp-shading that leads nowhere and is mostly there as a jab at criticisms of the show. However I did enjoy the fact that she’s a lot more self-aware than she seems, but that weirdly makes her worse as a person. 

So into the episode, which involves Elena going insane due to the hunters curse which I’m pretty sure is the only reason she really feels bad for killing him. I guess I lied because Elena does annoy me briefly when she’s arguing with Stefan about not trusting him and says “don’t bring up Damon”. I just felt like saying “sweetie being waay too defensive for someone in the same boat” which I guess makes sense if you’re the cheating one in the relationship. They really didn’t set Elena up very well for her relationship with Damon -- things like this are the exact reasons why people say she cheated on Stefan with Damon. 

So anyways while Elena is having one of her episodes Klaus kidnaps her and the gang separates into two groups to save her -- the ‘productive’ group and the ‘makes everything worse’ group which Stefan is weirdly. I spent the majority of the episode wondering why he was trying to get her back from Klaus.He knew that she was perfectly safe with him. Sure there’s reasonable trust issues, but he knows better than anyone at this point tat Klaus has a vested interest in Elena staying alive, so while everyone is looking for a way to break the hunters cure he wastes an episode trying to find a suicidal from basically her rubber room -- believe it or not those actually have a function and it’s to protect people from themselves. 

I’m going to start with the productive group because they annoyed me a lot less. It’s basically Bonnie and Damon going to Shane. This plan starts with Bonnie saying the spirits won’t let her use magic and Damon forcefully telling her to do something and then she does. That right there annoyed me because for one, why is she acting reluctant is we the audience know she’s going to do it anyway. That was at first what I thought to be one of the few subtle ways the show uses to take her agency away because she can’t even do something voluntary at this point, but then something Elena’s hallucination of Katherine got me thinking. She says that “you got her Grams killed, her mother turned into a vampire. I’m pretty sure Bonnie hates you” (paraphrased). This episode made me think that is very plausible because she’s the only one treating the situation with the right amount urgency. She’s not jumping immediately to save Elena’s life and when they find the solution she’s not immediately telling Jeremy to kill a vampire. She tries to make sure everything isn’t worse by asking Jeremy if he truly wants to become a hunter. This is about the closest she get’s to character development that’s immediately taken away by not immediately jumping to save Elena. God how I wish things had stayed that way, actually if I’m wishing for something it would be for Bonnie to have actually killed Elena at prom, but sadly if that happened I know the writers would just have her dying bringing back Elena instead of Jeremy that season, but hey, that at least would have made more sense.

Anyway there’s Damon who didn’t annoy me, but I did find him pretty much useless. Him going with her to see Shane was pointless, in fact truer to his character he should have been apart of the making everything worse group. He actually made little sense to me here by not doing the irrational “save Elena” thing. There was literally no sense of urgency with him even when found her on the bridge and has to save her from killing herself. And even earlier when he calls Stefan makes little sense.

And while I’m on things that make little sense to me, April Young. Now she’s not exactly my favorite character, but I honestly don’t get the hate around her. I would have actually expected more people to be defending her since she’s only there as a ditsy plot device. Granted if she had been killed off there were more worthy characters of her place such as the hybrid Chris in this episode, but to me she was always a non-entity -- she has zero agency or even character development, she was a legit prop and no different in this episode as a way to expose Shane who I gotta say for such a ‘mastermind’ (I’ll give him credit for setting up the sacrifices as well as he did), he was really terrible at covering his tracks. Hosting an event at the same place as the girl who’s father you convince to sacrificially kill himself and others is either absent minded or that cruel either way neither is smart.

Caroline and Tyler quite honest was one of my favorite ships, but this episode reminded me why I found it easy to ship her with Klaus (which has since waned to not a ship I prefer, but I still don’t hate). This show also reminded me that for a show that spent so much effort avoiding the words slave or slavery, they sure make a lot of allusions to it. First with Emily, then with just about every black witch and the literally with Klaus and his sired hybrids who are his henchmen without a choice. And Tyler let’s Caroline in on his secret to change that and she immediately betrays that by actively, with Stefan, getting Chris killed. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever been so mad a Caroline as a character because she was always the one with the most character development, but this was just an episode that highlighted that she can be just as hypocritical as Elena. 

Edit: I thought I posted this but apparently I didn't and it's been in my drafts for over a year.

[victoriaeden]

Wrapped up in your sweater, I was out cold til 4PM today without waking up even once- I’m usually up six or seven times- in the glow of these beautiful stained glass lamps that we grew up falling asleep to. Thank you if you gave that rest to me, I need it. I always loved these light so much and only saw them at your house which made them seem like there was some kind of magic held inside each piece of colored glass. There probably is and they’ll always remind me of you and make me smile. I made my coffee the way you like it this morning, far too white and far too sweet, but each sip makes me smile and I haven’t cried yet today. Gram always made fun of me for how much I could sleep. She rose with the sun and always had a pot of coffee ready for us. She’d let me sleep until she literally couldn’t stand it anymore- usually around 8:00 she’d come tap me to tell me that coffee was ready- she could not WAIT for me to grab a mug and sit on the couch so we could start talking about anything and everything. I’ll miss those mornings more than you’ll ever know Gram. https://www.instagram.com/p/B3feSAcl0np/?igshid=tm5j0tp73ch9

[notgoingtohappen]

Revenge, Interrupted (Part 11)

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A/N: Sorry this was so late.

Caroline checked out of her hotel and met up with Elena and Bonnie in the lobby. They grinned excitedly at each other, knowing this was it: the beginning of next chapter of their lives, and Caroline was ready. She had an apartment, a job, her best friends and a boyfriend.

Well, fake boyfriend, but her life was on track nonetheless.

“So, where to first?” Bonnie asked.

“I need new clothes!” Elena said.

“Hello, we just moved here. We need to buy groceries and practical stuff, like, I don’t know, lamps.” Caroline added.

They agreed and a short subway ride later they were at the mall and shopping to their heart’s content. 

Elena ducked into the nearest clothes boutique, promising to be back in twenty minutes tops, while Bonnie helped Caroline pick out the prettiest decorative items from a home décor shop.

After plenty of easy conversation—it really felt like they’d been together the last four years and she was so grateful for that because she wouldn’t know what to do without Elena and Bonnie in her life—Caroline broached the subject she thought was the reason Bonnie looked troubled.

“How’s the job search going?”

Bonnie bit her lip as she surveyed a white and golden vase. “Okay. I had that interview at a preschool today and I think the dean liked me.”

“You’re amazing, of course she did!” Caroline couldn’t help but voice some of her innate optimism. She hated seeing Bonnie stressed.

“If it doesn’t work out, I can always go work for Grams in her psychic shop.” She muttered as they headed to the checkout counter. 

“Let’s be logical. There has to be at least one school in this entire city that will hire you. And you have a good resume.”

Bonnie cheered up a little. “Yeah!”

“Okay, now let’s find Elena. I need food.”

“Don’t we also need plates and cutlery and all?”

Caroline grinned. “Oh my god, this is so exciting. It’s like when I played house with my dolls as a kid, but this time it’s real!”

“I remember your dollhouse. It was so organised and elaborate, I don’t know if it was impressive or terrifying”

Caroline whacked her arm playfully. “It was the best dollhouse in town.”

“So impressive and terrifying I guess.”

Caroline opened her mouth to inform Bonnie of the fact that everyone in their class had been jealous of what Caroline had done with her toys and it was a remarkable feat for a pre-schooler, when Elena walked up to them with three large Walmart bags.

“Surprise! I went grocery shopping. Here is literally everything we could ever need. I even bought three boxes of Nerds.”

Caroline laughed. “Woah, thank you!”

“Even utensils and plates et cetera?” Bonnie asked.

“Yes, but I bought paper plates…”

“It’s more convenient until we get settled properly, I guess.”

“Okay, now can we go buy some clothes? That first shop had some reaaally nice stuff!” Elena asked.

“Yes, fine.” Caroline nodded. She did need to update her wardrobe. And she wanted some new makeup…

~*~*~

Seven stores later, the girls collapsed onto the chairs at the food court, exhausted.

“So that was fun. Who else wants a salad?” Bonnie asked.

“I need sugar.” Caroline whispered.

Elena leant forward and tiredly looked her in the eye. “We agreed last week, keep the carbs to a minimum. It’s my duty as your best friend—“ Elena broke off suddenly, a girl walking past them with a milkshake catching her eye. “You know what? Let’s split a Snickers and call it a day.”

“Thank god you bought chocolate.” Caroline sighed as Elena reached into one of the gigantic shopping bags.

They split it three ways and then Elena went off with Bonnie to get their lunch— they knew each other’s orders by heart—while Caroline pulled out her phone. 

She had a text from Nora, one of her friends from college. She talked to her college friends often but they all lived in different cities now and she’d already begun to drift away from some. She realised she missed them. Bonnie and Elena and Damon had each other, but she’d spent the better part of the last few years with Hayley and Luke and Kol and Mary Louise.

That reminded her, she should check in on Tyler. He’d returned to Mystic Falls with Liv and it had been days since they’d spoken. She sent him a single ‘Hey’ which was marked as delivered within moments.

She was now feeling a little wistful and low, but pushed the thoughts away when the girls returned with lunch. They set down a Caesar salad, her absolute favourite, in front of her and she suppressed a smile. They were still her best friends. Things had changed over the last four years, but that was life, and some things were still the same.

Bonnie’s phone started buzzing and a huge grin spread across her face. So that was probably Enzo then.

“Hi.” She said happily, and then looked thoughtful. “Oh, yeah okay. I’ll ask. Bye.”

She looked up at them. “So… who wants to go to that bar tonight?”

Caroline felt slightly confused. “Wait, which bar?”

Elena was suddenly extremely interested in her fork. “The one we told you about…”

Caroline glared. “Oh, the blind date one? The one you sent me to and made me wait for hours at?”

“It’s a really nice place…” Bonnie offered.

“And you met your boyfriend there so… it’s kind of romantic?”

Caroline sighed. “Yeah sure, it’s not like I have other plans.”

“At least you have a job.” Bonnie said.

“I don’t start for another week.”

“Oh yeah, I got the internship at the hospital!” Elena interjected.

Caroline looked over at her, stunned. “No way! Congratulations!”

Bonnie reached over and wrapped an arm around Elena. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

She shrugged. “Forgot to mention it. I knew I’d get it, I wasn’t that worried.”

“Okay, this calls for a celebration. We are definitely going.”

~*~*~

Caroline sat next to Stefan in silence, as Damon and Elena were laughing over who knows what in the backseat. They weren’t really talking, but Damon and Elena were too busy to notice.

It was funny how they were pretending to be dating for the benefit of their friends, but they were more at ease and natural when they were alone. That was when they talked openly and laughed and… kissed. A lot, apparently.

She groaned inwardly, trying to get the thought out of her head, and turned to Stefan.

Ugh. Why did he look hot while driving? Who did that?

He was concentring pretty hard and his eyebrows were a little furrowed. She resisted the urge to reach over and smooth them with her finger.

Oh wait, she could technically do that. Their friends were there, so…

Instead, she placed her hand over his on the gear and smiled reassuringly when he looked over with a surprised expression.

The look he gave her set off butterflies in her stomach, but she ignored them.

It was such a normal and insignificant thing to do but it she was hyper-aware of her hand on his and moved it away when they pulled into the parking lot.

They walked behind the others, standing close together as they entered the bar. It actually reminded her of Mystic Grill in some ways; it had little tables and pool table. They found a table and Stefan announced he was going to order some drinks and leant down to give Caroline a quick peck on the cheek. Her heart raced when he was that close again. Pathetic.

The college… quartet, now, were very excited about living together and Elena’s internship and as much as she hated acknowledging it, Caroline felt a little left out again. She didn’t blame them or anything, it just sucked.

After a minute or two of listening about Nadia’s wild shenanigans, she wandered off to find Stefan. He was standing by the bar and waiting for the drinks.

“Challenge you to a fun game of pool? You look like you could use it,” she asked.

He raised an eyebrow. “Use it?”

“I’m just saying.”

“Oh, you think I’m too serious?” he asked, looking more amused than offended. “Challenge accepted.”

They carried the others’ drinks over to them and Caroline left hers on the table. No way was she drinking anytime soon with this particular company. The last thing she needed was them getting drunk and hooking up in the washroom or something.

She noticed he didn’t have one either. “No drink?” she asked, wondering why. She’d gotten the impression that Stefan and Damon were pretty fond of bourbon.

“I volunteered to be the designated driver.”

“Oh.”

Of course that was it. He probably thought nothing of last night. A guy like him had probably had loads of drunk kisses, and well… more. She was overthinking.

~*~*~

“Hah!” Caroline exclaimed as a ball rolled into the slot.

Ten minutes in, and she was winning.

Stefan rolled his eyes but a faint smile was on his lips. “Just a fluke.”

“Oh, you wish.”

This was so much fun. It was like hanging out with her best friends, only… different, somehow. She found that didn’t want to return to the others.

“Okay, break.” She announced as her phone buzzed. It was a Snapchat from Hayley.

‘Miss you Care!!!’, read a picture of her with a green face mask on.

Caroline grinned and hit reply, taking a quick picture of herself with a funny face and typing in ‘At a bar’. She decided was going to call Hayley the next day and tell her about this plan.

Hayley’s reply was quick: ‘who’s the funny hottie in the background?’

Caroline stared at it, confused, and then understanding dawned upon her as she turned around.

Stefan flashed her an innocent look.

She narrowed her eyes. “What did you do, make horns behind my head?”

He gasped theatrically and placed his hand on his chest. “That would be so immature. I stuck my tongue out at you.”

She giggled and rolled her eyes.

‘My boyfriend. Sort of. Long story.’ She typed into a picture of the pool table. ‘Sort of? Can I have him then?’, Hayley just straight-up texted her.

‘Hands off.’ Caroline had typed and hit send before she could give a single thought to why she’d said that so instinctively and what it meant.

‘LOL K but I need deets ASAP.’

“What do you say, should we continue?” Stefan asked.

Caroline put her phone down and tied her hair back with the hair tie on her wrist. “Absolutely.” She replied, determined to win.

12

[kashmiresims]

Forgotten Empire

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Orion appreciated all types of music. Jazz was something he didn't hear often but still loved it when he did. The Jazz bar Nick had gotten them into without paying cover was a cozy dive in downtown Scandalica City; it was called The Smooth Mute.

Despite being in a place buzzing with music, with a guy he liked, and one of his good friends—Orion just wasn't feeling it. Cain had ordered them some martinis and Nick was drinking beer. Maybe alcohol was the reason. Orion didn't usually drink but took sips of his martini since Cain was kind enough to buy it for him.

Or, maybe the reason Orion wasn't feeling the atmosphere was because Nick was seated in between him and Cain, and it was the first time in awhile that he and Cain were able to go out. Orion would have liked to sit next to Cain and he didn't want to come off as pushy or ungrateful toward Nick by demanding they trade spots, so he kept quiet. Cain didn't seem to care who sat by him; Nick didn't seem to notice the guys were kind of together.

It shouldn't have bothered Orion so much that Nick and Cain were getting along famously. It was good at least one of his friends was warming up to Cain. It wasn't like Nick was into dudes either, but he did seem to be a natural flirt when he talked to people and his extroverted nature made people like him rather quickly. It had always been that way, ever since they were boys. Orion still wondered exactly why Nick had left the fraternity—it was an environment perfect for him.

Nick and Cain were currently discussing sports, something Orion didn't have that much of an interest in so he focused his attention on the jazz players and took another sip of his drink. He only acted like he did because all his friends were into it.

"We should go to a game sometime. I have a connection at the student center that can get us discounted tickets," Cain said.

"That'd be awesome. I used to play in high school but sort of lost the time to practice," Nick smiled, "What about it Orion? You want to go to a soccer match with us sometime?"

Orion blinked a few times since he was finally being addressed, "Sure."

How was it that Orion had become the third wheel on his own date?

"That reminds me..." Cain swirled his drink around and eyed Orion. Orion felt a bit hopeful they'd finally talk about something else. "You have that third room upstairs you and Cypress use as storage—why don't you clean that out and let Nick live with you?"

Orion wasn't expecting such a question and Nick wasn't either. Orion hadn't even thought about offering Nick the room. Did that make him a bad friend?

"I didn't know you had a third room! I thought that was a closet!" Nick laughed, becoming eager that there was a chance he wouldn't be homeless for much longer.

"Um, no..." Orion thought about it. Cain and Nick looked at him expectantly and he didn't want either of them to think he was a jerk. He'd have to talk to Cypress but didn't see the harm in having Nick live there, "I guess if you wanted to split the rent you could move in."  

Nick reached over and grabbed Orion into a grateful hug, "Bro, you and Cy are the best! Thank you!"

Nick's pocket started buzzing suddenly and he dug his phone out to look at it.

The Caller ID indicated that his father was calling.

Great, he thought to himself sarcastically. Way to ruin the mood. His father calling was never a good thing—but knowing him, he wouldn’t stop until Nick answered. Nick took a swig of beer and excused himself from the table to go outside where it was quieter and he could take the call.

The night air was a moderate temperature, and the streets were relatively empty because it was a Monday evening. No one was even passing on the sidewalks. Good, the less there were to hear his Dad’s shouting, which was all their conversation inevitably spiraled into as of late.

Nick pressed the ‘accept’ icon and put the phone to his ear.

“Hello?” “Hello Nicholas,” his father’s voice was even, almost bordering on displeasure.

“Hey, Dad. What’s up?”

“Can you explain to me why one of my biggest donors just pulled out of my campaign?”

“Uh…” Nick stalled, not really knowing what the heck his dad was referring to or why he would think his son was involved, “Who would that be?”

“Pryce Cosgrove, the CEO and President of the Cosgrove Collective. He cited his reasons for dropping funding was that if ‘my son can’t take his greek society membership seriously, then how could I—as your father—take my position as mayor seriously.’ Why would he have such an impression?”

Here it was, the moment before the storm. Nick had to take a deep breath before responding, “I quit the fraternity.”

He expected a loud, angry, inquiry as to why but it was even worse. There was silence.

Nick scrambled to fill it, “Cosgrove’s son was drugging drinks at our parties. I made my objections clear but he’s the president—it wasn’t like he was going to stop so I had to leave. It's okay, though, I'm not a hobo. I'm going to live with Orion and Cypress.”

“You’re ruining me, son,” his father said in an exasperated sigh, and it struck Nick harder than he’d have thought. Didn’t his dad even listen to what he was saying? Girls were being taken advantage of and Elm Calhoun could only be concerned for himself and his image.

“I can’t be a part of a school society that thinks something like that is acceptable.”

“It’s a part of being in that society. You just deal with it and move on,” his father snapped.

Nick was rendered speechless before a blast of anger shot up through his body and out of his mouth, “If that’s true, and you really believe it then you are the worst judge in the history of Kashmire and I hope you lose this election hard!”

With that sentiment aired, he ended the call. He couldn’t stand his father—the most conceited, arrogant, and inattentive man Nick had ever known. This was why he always referred to himself with his mother’s surname—the family name of his Grams and Gramps—a name that invoked the love they had given him throughout his life: Hart.

Calhoun was his legal last name, the name he was born with, the family he was born into but he refused to share the name of the man he reviled so much and it gave him the tiniest of petty pleasures that every time someone referred to him as Nick Hart it would drive his father mad.

Nick knew what he’d said to his father wouldn’t be without consequence and he shuddered to think what his dad would do if he happened to unseat the current Mayor. He wasn’t that worried, though. Orbinson was incumbent, and that whole family was a political dynasty in the region. He could only surmise that his father was running for the mayorship because he wanted more power and passing life-altering judgments on people wasn’t enough to satisfy him anymore.

Nick fiddled with his phone absently, wondering how his father was going to punish him for his insult. Nick was always the defiant Calhoun son—sneaking out, questioning orders, trying to plan a path in life that his father had a minimal hand in. Shane was clearly the favorite son, the academic with a bright future, and Kit was so innocent, he wouldn’t question anything their father did. 

Nicked pocketed his phone, figuring he should get back to the guys before they started to wonder.

They spent another hour or two drinking and listening to jazz. Nick found Cain Nova wasn't half as bad as Cypress seemed to think. He was funny and could keep up a good conversation though he and Nick seemed to try and out-brag each other many times. They ended up paying their tab and laughing their way out the door while quoting their favorite comedy movies.

As they were walking back to the bus stop, they passed a series of warehouses.  

"What was this place?" Nick asked, gesturing toward a three-story brick warehouse that had seen better days.

"Oh, the old Armscor warehouses. It used to be a packing place thirty years ago or so that went out of business. The city should probably demolish the lot—it's just more urban blight," Orion answered and they stopped briefly to look at it. He forgot how he knew that fact. Maybe he read it in a history book?

Orion saw nothing special but Cain and Nick were seeing something different and instead of continuing toward the bus stop, they wandered into the lot.

"Hey, what are you guys doing?" Orion caught up with them as Cain bashed off an old, rusted lock attached to the chain on the doors leading into the front warehouse.

"Aren't you curious?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, where's your sense of adventure?" Cain teased. Orion looked through the dusty windows at the dilapidated interior. He shuddered. There were probably mice in there too.

"I promised Cypress I wouldn't get his shirt dirty," Orion shook his head and made an excuse not to enter.

"Well it's your loss," Cain dismissed the worry and pulled open the door which made a creaking noise loud enough to wake the dead.

"You can just keep from rubbing against anything," Nick suggested, "Come on and check it out with us." He too went through the double doors. Wasn't this breaking and entering? Trespassing? Orion stood beneath one of the only working lamp posts on the lot and felt a vast sense of loneliness with the darkness surrounding him.

He swallowed his apprehension and followed.

Cain and Orion had already made it to the second floor; It was dark and there were silhouetted mountains of old boxes. It was like the company had gone under and didn't bother to clear anything out, just packed up and left it the way it was. It was kind of a sad notion--simply abandoning all the products. It wasn't like they could hire anyone or pay to have it removed, so it all just sat there gathering rust and dust over the last three decades.

"I wonder if any of the lights work?" Nick wondered out loud and his voice echoed off the ceiling and through the expanse of the room.

Orion tried extra careful not to bump his shoulders or sides into any of the protruding clutter. He could barely see Cain climb another set of stairs onto the next level that overlooked the warehouse's second floor.

"I think I found a switch!" Cain called down to them. Nick and Orion hurried up after him. They heard a metallic clink, then a groan and finally a dull buzz as several of the overhead lights flickered on and illuminated the warehouse.

"This place is awesome!" Nick exclaimed with the edge of excitement in his voice. It felt like he was a kid again and had the opportunity to explore a big, mysterious playground. What were in the boxes? What was in the other warehouses? The world was at his fingertips.

"Indeed," Cain mused.

"Let's get out of here," Orion said and put his hand on Cain's shoulder, "We shouldn't be here."

"Chill out," Cain put his arm around Orion's waist to give him ease, "No one cares enough about this place to complain about a few mischievous college students rummaging around in it."

Orion relaxed just a little, perhaps now not so eager to move because of the placement of Cain's hand.

"I'm going to check out the next warehouse," Nick said and slid down the stair rail, which left a streak of dust on the backside of his workout pants. He patted himself down and ducked out a side door to the fire escape. Cain made a move to follow but Orion wrapped his arms around Cain's shoulders and kept him from leaving.

"Can't we just be alone for two seconds?" He pleaded in a quiet voice, the frustration obvious in his tone.

Cain stopped and considered the request, "What's the matter? I'm just trying to get along with your friends. You always encourage that, and it's not like Cypress makes it easy."

"I know, I appreciate your... enthusiasm but I want to spend some time with you. I've missed you."

Cain's prominent brow softened and then grinned wolfishly, taking Orion's hand without another word and led him to the supply lift. Orion was curious to where they were headed but didn't question it. He trusted Cain. 

The switch Cain had found earlier must have activated the power grid the warehouse was on because to Orion's surprise and relief, the lift functioned and delivered them to the roof of the warehouse.

The of view of downtown was pretty stellar. Thankfully the rooftop was solid as they stepped out of the lift and onto it. Cain pulled Orion forward and held him in his arms, "I missed you too, star boy."

The way Cain said 'star-boy' made Orion melt a little. When they had first met and Orion introduced himself, Cain took to calling him that on account of Orion sharing a name with the constellation.  

"How's that Tranquilicis treating you?"

"It's amazing," Orion felt himself smile. If it wasn't for those pills who knows how many anxiety attacks he would have had? He could have been having one now with all that had happened this evening, but at least had the sense to take one before he left the house.

"That's good to hear. I'm glad it's working for you."

"I was wondering," Orion mumbled, "Can I get some more? I think I only have a few left."

"Of course," Cain reached up and skimmed his fingers tenderly along each side of Orion's jaw—right where it met at the neck—and leaned forward. Orion let his eyes fall closed and parted his lips in anticipation but then... they heard the doors to lift squeal open.

They ripped away from each other and faced the doors to see Nick appear, "Here you guys are. I guess I accidentally left you behind. Sorry, my bad."

Orion knew it was unkind and that he'd regret it if it actually happened, but he couldn't help but to imagine bellowing with rage and throwing Nick off the roof in that instant. He'd be out a roommate but maybe he'd actually get to be alone with Cain for more than five. Freaking. Minutes.

Cain had his arm behind his back and Orion stood stiffly with his arms crossed. This was the worst date he'd ever had. It might have failed at being a date already, and reduced to a simple outing with the boys.

"Did you want to see what was in the other warehouse?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, man, let's check it out!" Cain nodded and moved forward while making a grab for Orion's hand. Orion rejected it. It caused Cain to take pause and look at him in question.

"You guys go, I kind of want to sit alone for a moment."

"Suit yourself," Cain shrugged and followed Nick down the lift. Orion sat on the slanted tin roofing and sighed. He didn't hate Nick but found it really damn annoying that Nick had ruined the moment with Cain he’d been waiting for all night. The worst part was Nick wasn't even doing it on purpose!

Cain really seemed to like Nick and maybe that was a good thing about having Nick live at the house with them—Cain would come around more often if he had someone else to get along with. Cypress didn't make much of an attempt and Orion didn't know why. Cypress just seemed to isolate himself in his room when Cain visited, rather than be forced to converse.

Orion looked out across the warehouse rooftops to the city beyond and couldn't help but to realize how peaceful it was up there. Despite the whole breaking in aspect, he knew Cypress would have loved the view too.

Nick had climbed the third staircase in the back warehouse where it ended on another landing. He'd found old furniture—beaten, battered, and worn with age. There were dirty old desks and chairs, and even holes in the floors where the lumber had given out. This was much better than the clubhouse he’d always wanted as a boy. Cain was looking through an old filing cabinet that had ear-piercing sharp, squeaking drawers.

Nick surveyed the contents of the new level and froze suddenly at what he saw. Was that...was that what he thought it was?

"Hey!" Nick called down to Mr. Eyebrows. Cain looked up to where he was. There weren't as many working lights in the back warehouse so it was harder to see.

Nick gestured with his arm for Cain to come join him on the upper level. Cain climbed the stairs and stopped to catch his breath since he'd made it so quickly at Nick's urging. Then he caught site of the same thing Nick was staring at.

"Holy shit," Cain exhaled and moved closer, covering his mouth with disbelief.

Nick smirked and crossed his arms, thinking the same thing as Cain.

Before them stood a worn old counterfeiting machine. But it wasn't just any counterfeiting machine—it was a genuine silver-age model that the old syndicates used before they were shut down. Armscor warehouses hadn't been just a packing facility, but also the business front for an empire of crime.

[wanderinglotus7]

Escape to Paradise

My time in Bangkok is coming to an end real soon. Instead of being cooped in the city, me and some friends decided to take trips to Khao Sok and Koh Phangan. Both places are located in the south of Thailand. These are my last two trips before heading back to Virginia. I want to include Laos too, but my finances pushed back this trip till further notice.

Khao Sok was first! Some might think this trip could’ve waited, but it was a great mini vacation before I started finals. Besides it was for McKenna’s birthday and I’ve been studying almost every other day for finals...so I deserved it. Khao Sok is luscious with the many greens and colored flowers showering the landscape. The bungalow we stayed at was located in the jungle and near a local river where you can go tubbing. Awaking up to the sound of rain in the morning was relaxing and refreshing. Another place that reminds me of home, and it also reminded me of Vietnam too. The trip there wasn’t too bad expect for getting scammed to take a Tuk Tuk to the bus station which was in walking distance. Whatever.

We mostly walked around the local area and played plenty of card games pretty much every where we went. I learned some new card games like poker, but don’t expect me gambling away at the big casinos in Vegas or anything like that. I did spend one morning and afternoon studying for my Basic Thai exam, I’m not really sure how effective that was because thinking about taking that quiz and exam those grades are gonna be kind of iffy. Besides chilling, I hitched on the back of Noah’s rented motorbike and discovered a Monkey Temple not too faraway from our accommodations. Before the temple, I purchased a nice piece of clothe that has multiple purposes. I’m using it as a wrap skirt, head wrap, scarf, and cover-up. I’m always telling myself to stop messing around with these monkeys, and yet again, I found myself walking a monkey temple. Cue the PTSD again! As me and Noah were walking, we witnessed a group of monkeys and dogs getting buck with each other. Suddenly, I was transported to an episode of animal planet. I caught on video a pack of wild dogs attack and kill a full grown monkey in front of my eyes. It was complete savage. Then the whole place went into a roar. I was ready to book it! I was not getting caught up in this hot mess.

Eventually, things calmed and the monkeys went their way and the dogs went their way. I did feel sorry for the dead monkey, he didn’t deserve to die like that (what if he had a little family). On the bright side, I did see baby monkeys playing with each other. Noah went back and brought everyone else to the temple and we climbed up the stairs built in the cliffs. The view from the top was amazing, but then it started to rain its tail off. Some us waited in a small cave till the rain lightened enough to walk in the rain without being drenched. We stopped at an excursion spot and signed up for an all day tour at the lake. They did not inform us what type of activities we will be doing. We thought it was going to be a simple boat tour of the lake and we would chill there and have lunch. Wrong! We did tour the lake and had lunch on the water. After lunch, we ended up completing a two hour hike/trek through the jungle. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be, however, the terrain was slippery and muddy (I slipped maybe once or twice).

Our tour guide was chill and kind of funny. The water was nice and cool. I’m glad I did this, we ended up exploring a cave to reach the waterfall inside the cave. The water level was pretty high so, we couldn’t go that far but the distance we did go was good enough for me. Good thing our guide had some head lamps because it was dark up in there. He took us to a place in the cave where the conditions/environment was similar to what the young Thai soccer team and their coach had to experience when they were trapped a couple of months ago. I couldn’t imagine living in those conditions for days and not knowing if anyone knew where you were at or if people were even looking for you. After our exploration, we went back to the restaurant and spent the rest of our free time on the lake. Right when we exited the jungle it started to pour down rain.

We stayed in Khao Sok for at least five days and headed back to Bangkok on Tuesday. Then that following Friday, after our Thai final, we left for the airport to go to Koh Phangan. The mission was to attend the Full Moon Festival that Thailand host every month of the full moon. The festival is held on one of the beaches on the island. So, we had to take a taxi, plane, bus, and ferry to get to the island and then we had to take another taxi to get to our accommodations. The entire day was exhausting and the actual ride was bumpy the back roads are worse than my driveway at home. The trek was worth it because we were staying directly on the beach with the prettiest blue water and baby powder sand. The water was the right temperature, and the jungle was the back drop. Along the way, we convinced a nice woman named Diane to come along with us. We meet her on our ferry ride and she became like our adopted mom or the fun cool aunt. The festival wasn’t till Sunday so, we all just chilled at the beach and relaxed. Again, we played plenty of card games, swam and laid out in the sun (expect for me of course LOL). I spent most of my afternoons sleeping or listening to music in the hammocks around the property. The locals there were friendly especially our driver and the old head who ran the snorkeling boat.

Of course, we took plenty of pictures worthy of Instagram (I know I did). I’ve been flexin’ on the gram for a good while. Sunday came which meant all the parties and weirdos were coming out that night. The party was at the opposite end of the island, so we had to endure a crazy and bumpy 45 minute ride (I think it was that long). Pre-gaming was a necessity which began earlier that day. We ate dinner first and played a game before entering the event. Out of nowhere the sky fell and water flooded the streets. I was not having it. I found a plastic bag and used it to protect my braids from getting drenched. People stared, but I didn’t care. They were not the ones who spent a bunch of money getting their hair done (#blackgirlproblems). During the high season there would’ve been around 40,000 people but it was the low season so there was around 10,000 people which is still a lot in my book. During a 7/11 run, I wander off and found a tattoo studio. And that night I received my fifth tattoo (a big compass on my thigh). 

Different areas of the beach had different Djs playing various types of music. EDM music was mostly played throughout the night. I witnessed people dancing, puking their brains out, jump rope [which the jump rope was on fire], people sleeping, peeing in the ocean, and even saw two people having intercourse in the ocean ( I’m a little traumatized). It was an experience. Those are the only words I have to describe that night. We left around 3am and mostly rested the next day. I saw monkeys again (I can’t escape them). Then Tuesday morning, we left and headed towards the pier to go home. I don’t think either of us wanted to leave. I was really enjoying the island vibes. At least I’m done with all my finals so, I didn’t have to worry about studying, writing a paper or preparing for a presentation.

What a trip to finish out the semester.

[theconservativebrief]

It is difficult, these days, to be a fast-casual pasta restaurant. You can’t just be a fast-casual pasta restaurant, quickly serving low-key bowls of carbs. Now you have to be a fast-casual pasta restaurant fit for influencers. Or at least that’s what the Pastagram seems to think.

The Pastagram is a fast-casual pasta restaurant that is designed for weekday lunch breaks, but also Instagram. “Every single detail is thought of as to be the most photogenic as possible,” the press release promises, “catering to a customer base that — today more than ever — seems to give aesthetics as much importance as food quality.”

The “trendy spot” in New York City’s Financial District features “trendy teal blue décor” and also many shapes of pasta, handmade daily, to be paired, mix-and-match style, with many types of sauces. In the press release, the word “trendy” is repeated many times. Is New York City’s Financial District trendy? No, I would say, with all due respect to the New York Stock Exchange. Then again, millennials are the largest generation in the US workforce now, so maybe even workday lunches must be fit for Instagram.

This is how we live now. Restaurants aren’t just experiences; they’re experiences that are supposed to live forever online. A space does not just have to be attractive; it must be photogenic, which is different, which you know if you have ever watched America’s Next Top Model or seen a photo of yourself. This is true even if the space in question is located in a claustrophobic business district filled with angry people wearing lanyards with keycards on them.

Technically, anything you post to Instagram is “Instagrammable,” in the same sense that anything that will eventually break down in your body when you consume it is “food.” But saying a restaurant is “Instagrammable” means it tends to follow variations of the same script. The Verge identifies the necessary elements: neon signs “bearing modestly sly double entendres”; elaborate painted murals of wild animals; artistic custom floor tiles, often bearing “branded greetings.” Other frequent tells: whimsical paper products printed with twee phrases in custom fonts; distinctive patterned tiles or wallpaper; a strong signature color; great light. The Pastagram has many of these things, or at least gestures toward them.

There is something alarming about this homogeneity, but it’s also perversely heartening, how we are all the same. Deep down, we just want to post a picture of a vegan cupcake on a gently distressed table.

“It’s a young place, in a way,” explains Luigi Porceddu, who opened the restaurant, the younger, faster sibling of the more upscale Sola Pasta Bar, with partner Andrea Pedrazzoli. The name came from Pedrazzoli’s 19-year-old brother. “Pastagram, it sounds like Instagram,” Porceddu tells me, “but for us, in Italy, a gram is a unit of measure as well, that we use for pasta.” Originally, they were going to call it Yes We Pasta!, only that seemed too political, and anyway, “you can’t use something that is not around anymore.” So now it’s the Pastagram. “It’s catchy,” he says. “People, they remember the Pastagram.”

But did they originally set out to build an Instagram restaurant, or did that come later, once they had the name? Who can say. “That’s the most beautiful part when you create a restaurant,” Porceddu tells me. “You might have an idea, but then you shift the idea on the go, even before you open. So it was, like, many ideas coming at the same time.”

He is excited about all the Instagrammable details at the restaurant: pop-art-covered chairs, “ceramic art with spaghetti inside,” a pair of hanging monkey lamps, an intense proliferation of the color turquoise. Turquoise is elegant, Porceddu explains, and also universally appealing. “Everyone can love a turquoise, I think,” he says.

But at the Pastagram, as far as I can tell, nobody is ’gramming.

On a recent Thursday afternoon, I eavesdropped as two businessmen discuss one of their son’s ADHD diagnosis. Should they try medication? His wife thought no. He wasn’t sure. One table over, a post-teen man and woman were engaged in an animated conversation about what I eventually figured out was a dog with separation anxiety. I wondered if they were also considering medication. They really should, I thought but did not say, just in case they were going to start Instagramming. They did not.

It was not for lack of tools. Everyone had a phone, either in hand or on the table. A trim man neatly ate Alfredo and checked baseball scores. A different man with neon headphones ate spaghetti and meatballs while watching videos about food, but not the food we were eating. He Instagrammed nothing. On his screen, a hot pot sizzled.

In the corner by the window, under a neon display of pop-arty lips, a round-faced woman kept holding up her phone and gazing at it. She’s totally about to Instagram, I thought, but then it turned out she was Facetiming with her boyfriend, who wasn’t Instagramming either. It was like she didn’t even know this was an Instagram restaurant.

It would be up to me. The problem is that, despite the name, and despite the neon lips, the Pastagram is not very Instagrammable at all.

It is hard to capture the monkey lamp without also photographing the top of someone else’s head. Rachel Sugar/Vox The requisite neon sign! Rachel Sugar/Vox The aforementioned ceramic heart with spaghetti is an unsettling ode to pasta. Rachel Sugar/Vox Yes I Pasta’d (fusilletti with pomodoro sauce). Rachel Sugar/Vox

It’s true that I am not very good at Instagram, that my phone is old, that I am generally embarrassed, despite my generation, to take photos in public. It is also true, I think we can agree, that even with these caveats, none of these photos are great. They feel extremely attainable. The light is cold. The textures are flat. It’s hard to get a picture without accidentally capturing someone else’s head. Nobody looks casually glamorous at the Pastagram. They look like frazzled people eating pasta.

Like Porceddu said, there are a lot of “fun” details at the Pastagram. The monkey lamp is fun. The heart with spaghetti: also fun. The lip display is fodder for Instagram, although the extremely visible wires perhaps undercut its impact somewhat, and my fusilletti with pomodoro sauce and extra tomatoes was quite tasty. What you cannot see in the picture is the white, square, plastic-feeling table it was served on, or the plastic fork I ate it with, which came wrapped in further plastic and did not strike me as very ’grammy.

“The pastas that do well on Instagram are creamy and cheesy,” a colleague told me gravely when I told her about my troubles. “Fusilli is not an Instagrammable pasta.” For the purposes of documentation on the internet, I had ordered wrong. But the light was still the light, and the table was still the table, and there is only so much cheese can do. I searched Instagram for photos taken at the Pastagram. I found four, all of bowls of pasta.

I am not alone in my assessment: The opinion of the New York Post’s restaurant critic is that the Pastagram is tasty but, appearance-wise, “isn’t worth a click.” If anything, he sees that as a victory against the scourge of social media: “Although millennials might howl, it’s excellent news that Pastagram is more successful at serving decent, inexpensive Italian dishes than it is at reaching social-media ‘influencers.’”

It’s true that the Pastagram is much better at making pasta than it is at being a backdrop for Instagrams. What is fascinating is that it wants to try. It is a normal little quick lunch spot, with some good details and ugly floors and mediocre light and a weirdly sexy Instagram, and it wants to be a photogenic star.

It is uncanny to see a restaurant strive and miss on Instagram; it’s like seeing a casual acquaintance post thirsty selfies in ill-fitting jeans. Mistakes reveal effort, and effort is the antithesis of Instagram success. The Pastagram hasn’t put in the effort to look effortless, and the result is that its wires show; it is too much and not enough at once.

It is relatable, in a way. I also would like to be an influencer, and am not. I also like pasta. I am not, I think, alone in either of these beliefs. And so perhaps the Pastagram is exactly the restaurant we need right now, a metaphor for 21st-century urban life. The Pastagram would like to be a very specific type of cool, and isn’t, and still tries anyway. Soon, it’s getting a special “backdrop” for shooting better photos, according to the Post. Probably, it won’t help. It is who it is, and like the rest of us, it is not an Instagram celebrity. It is a pasta restaurant.

And isn’t that okay? Can’t we just eat our lunches, sometimes, and remember them in our minds? Maybe. Certainly, a lot of fast-casual restaurants are harnessing the power of Instagram, to great effect, and it makes sense: It’s great to have your customers do your marketing for you, reminding their friends of your existence when you pop up in their feeds.

At the same time, the truly Instagrammable restaurant remains the exception, not the rule. There are only so many By Chloes and Cha Cha Matchas, restaurants whose Instagrammability alone is a selling point. Even in the age of Instagram, a lot of restaurants mostly just serve food, which is good, because even in the age of Instagram, a lot of people mostly just want to eat it.

Original Source ->  At the Instagram restaurant where nobody is Instagramming

via The Conservative Brief

[normalizexceptional]

Utopia is on the other side of What’s Inside.

I’m 28 and I just tried magic again.  Literally.  Tried to move my bedside lamp with the spiritual energy of my passed loved ones and whatever friends they have on the other side. (That’s literally a request I made in my head to my Grandfather who passed before I knew him.  I made it a, “MAKE UP FOR DRINKING YOURSELF TO DEATH AND NEVER KNOWING ME BY MOVING THIS FUCKING LAMP,” type of Ultimatum.  He didn’t move the lamp.  But Wild made me think about Spiritual Energy again and how my latest peaceful theory and suspicion is that our Souls join the network of all invisible energy moving about the Universe, the ability to be anywhere, observe anything, communicate with everyone or no one because WE ARE ALL EACH OTHER AND WE ARE HAVING A FANTASTIC ADVENTURE ALL THE TIME, DUDE.  So that suspicion, plus the fact that I had been Hyper-ventilating-Crying thinking about my Grandma for about 74 of Wild’s 83 Minutes, made me DRAMATICALLY ask my passed relatives, (and their friends,) to move my fucking lamp.

ANYWAY.

I’m really glad my Mom kept reminding me to watch Wild.  Hit me so perfectly at specifically right now in my life.  You know, “now” being some brand of pre-30 introspection, combined with Gramma Peg passing on January 6.  What is my life?  What does it mean?  What does that question mean? What is “living?”  Wait, there are DIFFERENT definitions?  What is living for me, then?  What do I want out of being alive?  What can I CONTRIBUTE to this beautiful expression of LIFE?? Via Wild, Cheryl Strayed affirmed a lesson I took from Gram’s passing.  She could still choose to grow up and be the person her Mother RAISED HER TO BE, even after her death.

Hopefully, the important lessons from important people that we reject over the years while still growing into our brains and souls, never leave us.  Hopefully we can draw them out.  I think we can.  I swear my Grandmother has been coaxing me on, greasing the wheels...

Since her death I keep thinking of a line from Brigadoon:

“God!  Why do we have to lose things to find out what they really mean??”

Hopefully only a few precious things slip away before We find out.

What’s the answer to the question though?

When it’s a person, “lose” = “pass on.”

So when we no longer have the ability to hug and express affection and verbally, (and non-verbally,) COMMUNICATE with those passed whom we Love, it freaks us out.  So is the missing them selfish?  Not that all “selfish” is a bad thing.  But if we wait until somebody’s gone to say, “oh, shit, I fucked up, I wish I said more, I wish I asked more, I wish I visited more, I wish I loved more...”............then I think the truth is that we were too self-invested, in whatever way, and at that TIME in our LIVES, to give whatever we would ideally give to that loved one in a Utopian Life where we are already OKAY.

No.  It’s already OKAY.  There’s nothing wrong with learning by missing out.  I think it’s important.  And sometimes, you can not-miss-out in retrospect.

We have to be self-interested to figure out HOW to make our LIVES WORK the way we WANT THEM TO.  But once we know that, we need to DO WHAT IT TAKES to be HEALTHY---Mentally/Physically, and Spiritually---so we can then spend our mind space on our Utopian Idealism as it relates to Living and Loving.