#it really pisses me off that someone was trying to make my friend feel bad for talking about something she loves on HER blog ffs smh
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show tempe gang crossover with the morris islanders would actually have been the best episode of bones ever. btw
#please ignore the rest of the tags i will just be making things up#okay they start out in carolina but at least half the episode takes place in dc. do not ask me how travel logistics would work#tory spends the entire episode off with tempe doing bone stuff. booth feels upstaged by a 16-year-old girl#so he goes and hangs out with ben who does NOT trust him right off the bat#ben ends up having to run him over to liri at some point because there's crime afoot and tom is busy. they spend most of the ride in silenc#ofc they end up bonding Eventually because they are both obsessed with crazy emotionally stunted redheads named t brennan#tory is more effective than any of the squinterns and manages to piss hodgins off so bad just by existing#coop hangs out in the lab as saroyan tries to kick him out thirty times. he just keeps showing up and she can't prove who's letting him in#(it's tempe.) angela loves tory but tory does not love angela back. saroyan tolerates her. sweets likes her but knows she's hiding somethin#comes to the conclusion that she can read her friends minds and slowly drives himself crazy because obviously that can't be true#tory brings hi along whenever she needs someone with people skills and he is MORE than happy to participate in a hodgins experiment#hi gets to be king of the lab for about ten minutes. shelton hits it off with angela immediately and they solve half the case together#booth fucking HATES hi because he's evasive and really good at the manipulation thing. booth can't win verbal sparring and he gets Big Mad#at one point the four of them are in an interrogation room together (MISTAKE) because tory had them meddling a little too close to the sun#and booth is trying so hard to question them which didn't work even when they COULDN'T read each other's minds#tory figures out who did it and hi steals her thunder a la shrek wasnt vandalized he gave birth#temperance tells tory 'i know you've got a secret sweets told me and even though i don't trust psychology i find he's insightful' etc etc#tory's like well i might be but i can't tell you it's not just my secret and you wouldn't believe me anyway#because let's be real tempe WOULDNT believe her#meanwhile saroyan convinced by sweets paranoia managed to get a sample of tory's blood and test it and is like HEY WHAT THE FUCK#gets hodgins and they just stare at the results together and delve into conspiracy theories. he's like i KNEW there were werewolves#they debate telling tempe but know it wouldnt end well for the kids and decide to get rid of the evidence. but hodgins is SO smug#also angela spends the whole episode trying to convince everyone hi and shelton are dating and no one believes her#they finally see them kiss or something and they're all somehow floored and angela's just like yeah? duh?#if anyone read this i'm sorry and why
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i’m fr gonna lose my mind :)
#been a minute since i’ve ranted in the tags on here hi hello#so i have this friend who is driving me absolutely insane#we’ve been friends for about a year or so and when we first met we clicked right away and got super close and hung out all the time#we met at work but neither of us works there anymore and it feels like our whole friendship is falling apart now that we don’t#i literally have not seen her in person once since the last time we worked together (march)#and even before that we didn’t hang out outside of work since december of last year#and i have grown very used to having friends that just do not put the same amount of effort as me into our friendships and it’s sucks#so i was starting to make my peace with the fact that we just weren’t really friends anymore#but then a few months ago she started texting me asking me to hang out all the time and she seemed way more like her old self#and immediately i got sucked back in and was all excited to see her again and have her back in my life fully#but she completely flaked on me three times in a row (not even cancelling our plans but waiting until the next day to give me an excuse)#which like i said i’m unfortunately used to but she literally was the one who invited ME to hang out every time#like why are you initiating plans with me and then ignoring my calls and texts when it comes time to actually hang out#then a few weeks ago she texted me again saying we should go to a concert together bc we hadn’t in a long time#and there happens to be a concert i’ve been wanting to go to on the 31st but had no one to go with#she said she was totally in and really excited and i bought the tickets a couple days later and texted her to tell her i had#got zero response for almost a week and then she texted me yesterday saying we should hang out this week#so i said yeah let’s do it but also this concert is literally in 2 days are you still coming with me#and no response! again! so now i have 2 days to try and find someone else who can go last minute bc it seems unlikely that she will#and i’m just so fucking confused bc why do YOU keep reaching out to ME just to flake out at the last minute every single time#like at this point it feels like she’s doing it on purpose just to see if i’ll keep tolerating her bullshit#and part of me wants to just cut her off bc she’s been a terrible friend to me for months at this point#but i can’t bring myself to do it bc i miss her so much anyway and when our friendship was good it was really fucking good#like i considered this girl one of my best friends and now it feels like she’s just playing games with me bc she’s bored#which sucks extra bc last year she was there for me when literally none of my long time friends were#like it’s bad enough that it seems like our friendship was conditional on us being coworkers#but it hurts more and more every time she reappears in my life just to ghost me again like genuinely why would you do that#so i’m really upset and pissed off rn and i have no idea wtf to do about the concert bc idk anyone else who likes the artist enough to go#vent#lj.txt
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i could never understand fujoshis because i already loathe seeing any male in charged implications of any type let alone TWO of them
#it actually makes me feel physically sick even just one man on his own acting coy i would rather watch someone vomit#i already barely enjoy any male character centered media to begin with so it just pisses me off#sorry to my fujosisters#in ninth grade two of my friendS ( with an S that was like my most Friended year Evar i had about like 5 )#were trying to convince me ( they cornered me in the library ) to be a fujoshi one of them later explained to me what ABO was#amongst other messed up sick yaoi but she was otherwise so nice & sweet genuinely. looking back that was jarring#she was a really good student & she was so cute.like morally besides her taste in yaoi she was kind of righteous O_O#anyway the closest they have ever gotten to converting me was when we were all watching the original naruto series#&i ''''shipped'''' narusasu DISCLAIMER i am not the type to ship anything at all other than ponies sometimes. my mind rarely ever goes ther#they were genuinely so proud of me & they cornered me again to make me admit that i was one of them. what an awesome year#also the ABO fujo was really lesbophobic which broke my heart a little but to be fair she never found out i was gay#i was not a doormat in that situation for once we stayed friends after i only stopped talking to her when i went crayzay in 2020#i miss her despite everything x( ough. i wonder wat she up to. probably something great because she was smart & hardworking#this makes her sound really bad but i think she was/we were just 14 years old LOL
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shamelessly vagueing here and this sounds harsh but jesus some people really need to start realising not everything is about them.
not in a stuck up, the world revolves around me, arrogant way. but in a they’re not laughing about you, they’re not gossiping about you, you’re just insecure, reading into every little thing, hurt and need help type of way.
#it annoys me so much and i feel so bad saying it because i used to be one of those people but people really just need to take my word here#and no amount of reassurance will help these people it will only make it worse because they feed off of it and if you don’t reassure them#they’ll think you’ve betrayed them and have been talking about them next#i’ve been one of these people and I KNOW it feels really shitty and it’s really hard to get through but there comes a point where it’s just#straight up self sabotage#its not about other people anymore you’re just doing it to yourself#and it honestly pisses me off because from an outside perspective you’re just bringing everyone else down instead of doing anything about i#i KNOW mental health is more nuanced than that and that sounds so mean but ugjansiwnsjwo it’s just been annoying me#i’ll support you 100% but you cannot be coming to me every single day saying you know blah blah blah hates you when actually they think the#are your friend#so now YOURE the one talking behind peoples backs and hurting people and i CANNOT STAND ITTTTT!!!!!#just ugh#vague posting for the fun of it and it’s 6:00am and need something to distract me from crocheting#and i’m really trying not to be mean by saying all of this#just a post made out of frustration#i want nothing but healing for these people all they’re doing is pushing more people away and i don’t think they realise it and they put th#blame on others instead#because that’s exactly what i did#and looking back i was a really shitty person to these people and am so sorry 😭#long notes rant but please someone tell me they know what i mean by this 😭#irls got me worked up 😭#alèssi says things#pleeeeease someone understand and know i’m not just jumping on depressed people 😭🥲🥲#(editing to add by being really shitty to these people i don’t mean the insecure ones i mean my friends when i was like this)
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Prima facie round two. 5/17 🎭🤍
#pics and videos don’t do the front row justice at all#the way that it curves to the stage is crazy I had to take wide angle pics and even then can’t really tell how close it is#it’s also the only row lit up the entire show with a spotlight#was kind of overwhelming because you’re like face to face#like! at one point she sits on the floor of the stage and we made eye contact for what felt like a whole min and bro tell me why I felt SHY#like grl 😳#we got some smiles at the end too that invoked some gay panic#she’s even more beautiful irl it’s crazy#and talented like she puts everything into that#was so different seeing the performance so close up man was intense#like her crying hurt my damn feelings#my friend went out before us to try and find a spot for me to get an autograph cus friendship#because there's people there waiting before the show even starts it's wild#she got up front tho! and met a bunch of ppl someone had seen the play 8 times and there were other ke tattoos#I pissed off some ppl but made it up there and jodie wasn't feeling well enough to sign#I wasn't even mad I hope she's ok she does so much man I'd need a year off in bed#did get to see her drive off tho haha#maybe we'll make it down once more before it's done either to see it again or do other ny shit then try for an autograph#we’ll see#I hope she doesn’t get burnt out I even felt bad contributing to the feralness#the show is so heavy I hope she’s taking care of herself#we got sprayed a few times by her drinking water and yelling/talking so if she's sick and l'm getting jodie sick idec#I know ur not suppose to take pics aside from the bow don't come for me#that's why I took it from a horribly under the stage low angle from my ankle basically lol#l've had a headache and motion sickness grossness since the drive down p sure it's a migraine wanna just go sleeps#was so worth it tho for that incredible lady 😮💨#also! got to drive a bronco to and from which was cool I love them lately#ok bye I wrote so much shit probably incoherent#mine
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this is to ONE PERSON and one person ONLY. if you're confused, it's not you!
#you know. i saw you posted today from a different account. and it was one i totally forgot about#i didnt even feel like running back this time. was i curious? yes. did i end up looking? yep.#im saying this even though im 98% sure you cant see it but whatever. since when has that stopped me before?#you seemed fine. to say seeing that didnt piss me off would be a lie. oops i guess#i think its funny how the last thing you posted was stolen from me.#today it was one of those tag games we used to do together. your taglist was empty with some excuse of being absent on this app#i cant help but wonder if thats really all of it. if thats the whole story or not. i have a feeling the answer is no#i dont think youll ever understand the impact of what you did to me and the ways that you treated me. how that immensely fucked me up#or how youve basically thrown me to the wolves ever since you emotionally checked out.#you act like i never mattered to you and its been like that for forever. i made so many excuses on your behalf that i never should have.#these days the thought of you makes me go insane. the kind of insane that leaves me up all night and makes me wanna scream at the top#of my lungs. i have been consumed by anguish and hate. yes. im not afraid to say it anymore. i hate what happened and what you did to me#and sometimes i even hate you. and i dont even feel bad about it. im so over that because if theres anything i deserve after this hell then#its the capability to hate. for once in my life.#i saw your post and wondered if you thought of me. and i hope you did. i hope you thought of me and at the very least it stung.#because whether you want to admit it or not i was someone good. i bent over backwards for you every other day. try finding someone to do#everything that i did for you that you never appreciated. try finding someone who will care as much as i did about someone who couldnt be#bothered to tell me happy birthday. i dare you. because im tired of being sad that youre not here. im tired of being the one whos mourning#im so over it actually. because really i did so much for you. i gave up so much to be a good friend and it was never enough. i genuinely#cared about you. im not going to torture myself anymore by overanalyzing your posts or by thinking that i was nothing to you#because in one way or another youll miss me. and i hope the feeling is hell.#in the wise and paraphrased words of taylor swift. karma only comes back around to those who deserve it#in other words ill be fine#em speaks#tw vent ish#sorry to everyone else although i applaud you for being nosy lmao. gotta have my girlboss moment <3
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WIBTA for sabotaging my boyfriend's hookup with his girlfriend by filling his sex playlist with DJ Crazytimes
I (28NB, they/he) have known my boyfriend (call him C, 29M, he/him) for some 15ish years now. As long as I've known him, he has been on and off again with his girlfriend (call him T, 29NB, he/him). Respectfully, and with love, C and T are two of the worst and most annoying people I know. I want to marry them both specifically so that I can study them under a microscope like a parasitic virus.
Technically they're monogamous, but they're both hooking up with other people (myself included), usually the same people, because they have the same taste in lovers (bad). I have suggested that they give actual polyamory a try, and they reject the idea wholeheartedly. I think they get off on their dynamic, and far be it from me to try more than the bare minimum to dissuade them from it.
A couple months back, they got into a fight and broke up (again) because T (who was unemployed at the time) stole $50 from C (who works at GameStop) so that he could pay for a tank of gas (using C's car) to go hook up with another guy a couple states over. C was not upset that T was hooking up with another guy (because he was Also hooking up with that guy and knew he would not have a leg to stand on), but because of the stolen money + car.
C and I currently live together, because you can't afford an apartment on a GameStop salary, and also, like I said, he's my boyfriend. I'm making carnitas tacos next Friday, and T is coming over, because despite everything, he has nothing else to do on a Friday night. I know that C and T are going to get into a huge fight, and I know that it's probably either going to end with them getting back together out of spite or with someone's vehicle getting keyed--I'm betting on both.
Here's where I think I might be the asshole. I would really like to get inbetween them. Not in a "I don't want you to date each other" kind of way, but in a "holy shit you are both so insufferable i would like to get in on that" kind of way. I currently have my thing with C, and I've hooked up with T once in the past, but I would really like to make it official with him as well.
My plan is as follows: C and T are going to be in the same space again next Friday. They're going to fight, then hook up, then get back together again. C is one of those cybersexual "i built my own computer and run it on Linux" people, which is to say, he thinks tiktok and youtube are evil, and he he thinks spotify premium is supporting megacorporations. So, his sex playlist for T (we do not have our own sex playlist) is just an actual folder of mp3 files.
While C is at work, I'm going to log into his computer and change several of those mp3 files to DJ Crazytimes' Planet of the Bass, which I play often, and he is frequently annoyed by. My hope is that he'll realize it was me, he'll come and yell at me for ruining their hookup, T will take my side to piss him off, and the tension will get to the point where they let me join their hookup, and I can ask to date both of them after that.
To be clear, I recognize that I'm also Incredibly Toxic for enabling and encouraging this behavior. That said, I feel like I'm justified in this scenario considering C and T are both Also toxic, and furthermore, it is a known fact that I'm dating C right now, so for them to hook up, C would technically be cheating on me. I asked C's sister (a childhood friend of mine) for her take on whether it would be funny or just annoying, and she just told me that we all deserve each other, so I think I should be good. Am I being uniquely shitty here?
What are these acronyms?
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nakakaputanginaaaaaaaa
#how did i get to special school especially for scientific shit and fail miserably at the subject#what the fuck#it's second quarter and i still do not get this shit#teacher already explained it clearly but my smooth ass brain decided hey what if we had didnt braincells today#5/20 in the hw:))))))))#i dont get it at all. i have no fucking clue what to do. i dont know what i dont understand either.#and my anti social ass didnt even bother to ask the peps who knew it because im a fucking coward and i feel like wasting someones time when#they try explaining it and i still dont get it and ill have them explain in again and i can see the frustration on their face#and i dont have a thick face and make them explain again and again and again theyre not the teacher#so when they explain it once i just thank them and go off to fail another homework#parents are busy.and tired. sibling doesnt really get it either. teacher is busy.along with an extremely bad case of not Doing Normal Things#when i think theyre a waste of time to the other party. friends dont get it either.#and i wonder why im so fucking dumb#literally almost everyone gets it at this point and im the only one who doesnt which pisses me off and so i go to the blame game#but theres no on to blame is there. its just me.#'go to yt or google it' cant u get it. i literally cannot understand it. it refuses to enter my brain and im doing nothing about it#i have this really bad case of feeling like crying whenever someone explains shit to me and i still dont get it or they dont really explain#The Thing I Don't Understand. it annoys me#worsr thing about this is that next time there will be a new topic. yay! another topic to fail#i feel like the teacher never disscussed this but actually did. i just didnt listen properly.#end of story basically#i really thought that venting my problems on a site where ppeeps dgaf abt my problems would be the solution to this huh#i dont want to go to school tomorrow#aynut
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call it quits or call it destiny | h. umemiya.
✮ tags ; afab + fem!reader(she/her pronouns, referred to as a girl, gets dressed up by tsubaki and kotoha), reader gets their hair braided (no desc of texture) and puts on makeup, lore heavy reader backstory + personality, deliquent!reader, gap moe, best friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, themes of insecurity, mutual pining,the use of she/her for tsubaki, jealousy, confessions, loss of virginity, creampies / unprotected sex, oral (f!recieving), fingering, 18+
✮ wc ; 13.9k (dont. don't say anything)
✮ a/n ; me when i completely lose my mind because i have a weekend off. whats wrong with me.
anyways. there's no major triggers for this but be forewarned reader is meant to be very rag-tag deliquent type. she has a strong personality and generally is not feminine. she is like a mangy street cat a bit. also if u want u should listen to easily by bruno major while reading.
✮ synopsis ; you've been quietly pining for umemiya for a little over ten years with no plans of confessing.
you did not have a plan for what you would do if umemiya confessed to you first.
Once a day, everyday - Umemiya will come into your store, pause, smile, and confess his love to you before going off on his own.
And once a day, everyday, you reject this confession with a soft huff telling him to quit being stupid before shooing him away.
It's become a ritual. A fixture in your daily routine that you're not allowed to ignore despite how hard you're trying.
He's been doing it for three months, more or less.
His reason for confessing everyday? Because he’s waiting on the day you confess back, of course. Which you've refused to do for the last few months and will continue to refuse for as long as you’ve got.
It's not because you don't like him, alright?
You've known Umemiya since middle school and you've liked him for about the same time. One of the core memories of your childhood is the day you met him, crying while sitting on a swing-set, after what felt like the worst day of your life.
( On the day you run away from home, you seriously consider not going back.
You don’t really know how long you sit there. People walk by but most of them move on quickly. It’s mid-day before anyone bothers to stop and ask you something.
"I've never seen you around before.” A strange looking boy approaches, friendly and unassuming but not entirely cheerful “Did you just move here?"
You keep quiet, closing your eyes and hoping your lack of response is enough to push him away. Your hope fizzles out when you hear the swing creak as he sits besides you.
"I'm Umemiya Hajime. I live close by." His voice is airy and causal. "I'm sorry you're having a bad day.”
"Fuck off," You reply bluntly, frowning. “I don’t need sympathy. Leave me the hell alone.”
He pauses before pushing himself slightly forward to barely swing.
“I couldn’t leave you alone while you’re sad,” He voices willfully. "It might make you feel better to talk about it."
In disbelief at his response, you finally look up and asses him properly. It doesn’t do much to change your initial unfavorable impression. White hair, blue eyes and a little taller than you. You’re definitely about the same age. All of that to say, there’s something weird about him that you can’t quite place.
Despite his manner and way of speaking though, you don’t actually think he’s that weak which makes his whole aura even more unnerving to you. His attempt at being non-threatening doesn’t work for him. He’s being a real try-hard about trying to make you comfortable…
Either way, he’s got an air about him that puts you on the defensive.
Talking to someone about it had never been much of any option, and somehow it pisses you off that he’s being so brazen about it.
Maybe if you tell him about, he’ll stop prying into your business. Or maybe you’re just looking for excuses to let off steam.
You don't care anymore. You wipe your nose with the back of your sleeve.
"I don't live here and I didn’t move. I ran away." You reply.
He keeps looking at you, curious, inquisitive and sympathetic.
"Why?"
"I broke a girls nose." You scowl. The words rise up in your throat like bile. Make you feel cornered. The wounds too fresh. "It—she bullied me for years for one. And I never fought back, it was all petty bullshit anyway and I didn't like getting calls home. I didn't care about that but she—it wasn't for nothing. She was causing trouble for Sensei."
Umemiya keeps to himself, humming in response to your troubles. Your voice breaks on your next sentence, chest tightening.
"It doesn't matter what she does to me but—" Your hands ball up at your first. Your throat feels thick, eyes suddenly watering as your chest throbs . "Anyway, I couldn’t let it go like normal."
He hums. "So you hit her?"
You shake your head, sniffling. "Not at first. Just told her to shut up. Said that she didn't know what she was talking about. She hit me first..." You screw your eyes shut, sighing. "...said she was gonna spread rumors about him just trying to get under my skin and be malicious,” You lean back slightly and look up towards the gray sky. “I punched her after that."
You realize he's looking at your bloodied knuckles, but he isn't making an expression that you can read easily. You don’t remember the last time you spoke to someone like this who wasn’t Tsukimori-sensei.
"Are you crying because you got in trouble?"
“Who cares about that?” You sigh “Sensei had to put his job on the line and take responsibility for me,” Your brow furrows in frustration. “He’s the one person I don’t want to cause trouble for,” You grip the iron chains of the swing set with a closed fist and finally admit what you’ve been avoiding to say out loud. “I don’t want him to hate me…”
The kid besides you smiles absently at your words. Half-way between listening and recalling something else, it seems like. You can’t help but wonder what the hell his deal is. You barely know him but you’re spilling your guts.
He speaks after a long while. "I don't think he sees it that way. I think you should try to talk to him about it."
You make a face, rejecting the idea. "What? No way."
Umemiya shrugs, smiling - though it doesn't quite meet his eyes.
"He sounds like he cares about you. If he knew your reasons, there's no way he would hold it against you. And it’s important to share your burdens with people who care for you." You look over and see him smiling somberly at the mulch beneath his shoes before returning back to what you’ve grown to know as his usual self. "Anyways, I think we should be friends. Tell me your name."
You sniffle again. What a weird guy. Well you say that but
You still give him your name.
"What a pretty name,"
When you tell him to shut up again, your new friend Umemiya just laughs.
And you find you feel just a little bit lighter.)
That night, Umemiya walked with you to take the last train and told you to come see him again with good news.
You aren't sure what compelled you to follow his advice. Maybe because he was the first person who sat down and listened to you about it other than Sensei himself.
Tsukimori-sensei was your school counselor and the only adult in your entire life that seemed to worry about. You didn't have any friends in middle school and you were a scary looking delinquent girl without a mother and a mostly absent father.
But Sensei was always incredible gentle to you and incredibly kind. And despite what rumors that girl tried to spread - he was never anything more than an important mentor.
It was fucking embarrassing crying in front of him but because you were honest - you got to keep in touch with him. He attended your middle school and high school graduation - supporting you as you started to sort your life out. Became the closest thing you ever really got to a parental figure.
Over time, you got close with Umemiya and developed strong loyalty to him. You attended an all-girls middle and high school the next town over - totaling one other friend in all six years of your remaining education. Lack of socialization meant that Umemiya somewhat became the very center of your existence.
It was easy to visit him thanks to parental neglect. You sort of melted into his life. Tsubaki once called you his guard dog as a half-joke, but there's some truth to the sentiment. Quick to defend, quick to heel, and always happy to see him.
You, like many people, owe Umemiya a lot. His meddling over the course of ten years gave you reason to push forward. He even encouraged you to try and attend school and not give up on living a half-decent life.
You've got a never-ending list of short-comings but being with him didn't make you hate yourself. It made you want to be better because you knew Umemiya would accept you for whoever you decided to be.
So despite your delinquency, you managed to graduate high school. Post-graduation, you attended a vocational culinary school and became a patisserie before moving to Furin for permanent residency. You opened a bakery and supply bread to Kotoha-chans diner.
You made something of your life mostly 'cause of Umemiya. He's not your only friend anymore but he's still your best. Even though you never really pictured things like dating or romance - in some way it only makes sense that it'd be that meddling, kind-hearted idiot that you end up falling for it.
Lovesickness aside, you respect Umemiya more than anyone in your personal life.
He’s stuck around with someone like you this long after all. That means a lot to you.
Somehow the two of you mesh well despite being totally opposite.
You decided as soon as you realized it sometime in high school that you'd keep your feelings a secret for the rest of your life. You had a strong resolve in your beliefs about the whole thing which made it easy. You hid 'em so well even Sakura's stupid accurate romance detector didn't uncover them.
When you picture Umemiya's future - it was easy to picture the kind of woman he would end up with. Another kind-hearted idiot like him, a social butterfly. Someone a little softer.
In any case it definitely was not you. You didn't need it to be. You've received so much from him already, you never entertained the idea. Plus, Umemiya has dated other people over the years, so in your head there was never any hope to cling onto.
For all reasons listed above, a requited romance is at the very bottom of your expectations.
That's why you've been in this fucking conundrum.
To say it was a complete shock to you when Umemiya openly confessed to you many months ago would be understatement of the goddamn century.
He confessed right on the last day of Spring, totally out of the blue.
(It’s a little unusual for Umemiya to call you at this hour. If it were anyone else, you’d be a little upset since you’ve gotta be up around four-am to get prepared for the day.
It’s him though so you’re particularly tolerant, yawning as you find Umemiya on a familiar swing-set, still wearing your PJ’s.
"Why am I out here in the middle of the night with you?"
Your words lack any real malice as you sit down. Umemiya remains totally quiet. It's unusual for him to not immediately go on a tangent upon seeing you.
"Oi. Earth to Hajime." You frown at him. "Did ya get beat up before coming here and scramble your brain? Give me the popsicle before it melts."
He looks over at you and chuckles as he hands you the bag from the convenience store. You ignore his odd behavior and open up said popsicle before it melts - carefully splitting it down the middle and giving him the bigger side before going to town on your own. He takes it from you but doesn't even bring it up to his mouth.
Weird.
"Did something... happen? Like seriously happen?" You take a long lick of your iced treat. It's melon flavored, your favorite. "Seeing you frown doesn't feel right. Gives me the heebie-jeebies."
He cracks a little smile at that. It makes you feel better. He shakes his head.
"Mm, nothing happened. I just have something I want to tell you."
You nod in understanding. "'kay. Take your time."
He blinks, surprised.
"Hm? Aren't you gonna scold me for wasting your time?"
"Nah. Whatever it is must be serious if it's making you all introspective or whatever. 's fine. Bring me coffee tomorrow and I'll forgive ya."
His lip twitches up. "I l really like that about you."
You feel yourself flush and wave a hand at him. "Ahh, shut up."
He pauses for a second then shakes his head. "Mm. It's more like I like everything about you, actually."
You twist your face in confusion. "What are you on about now?"
"That's what I came here to tell you." Umemiya says after a deep breath. He says it so casually you wonder if you're mishearing him - leaning back to look up at the stars. "I really, really like you. I just felt like I had to tell you that"
You stare at him in disbelief.
"Wha—huh?"
He doesn't even flinch as he repeats it.
"I like you."
"No the hell you don't."
He furrows his brow with a light laugh. "I just told you that I do, silly."
"But that's—" You don't say the word impossible. You really want too, but you know exactly how he would react if you did. You simply shake your head. "No, you don't."
"I thought you might respond like this so don't worry but how about you?" He shrugs then looks at you intently. "I thought you might like me too."
Your eyes go wide. Oh fuck.
You feel like a deer caught in headlights. You know you should be happy about this, deep down. That'd be the normal response.
But you just feel complicated as shit instead. Fuck does he mean? Umemiya.... likes you? There's just no way that's true. Not after all of this time. And how the fuck does he know you like him back when you've been keeping it in?
You can't bring yourself to look him in the face and lie. Your heart rises to your throat as you shakily stand to your feet.
"Stop...thinking whatever you've been thinking. I'm going home." You reply in complete panic.
The minute you say it, you turn on your heel so you don't have to look at his face. You don’t even want to know.
And before Umemiya can catch you and try to talk it out, you bolt.
What the fuck was that?)
For the last few months, you've been avoiding the topic of conversation as much as you humanly can.
The possibility of Umemiya even just accepting your feelings was already far beyond your imagination, but him returning them? Confessing first? That wasn't even in your realm of possibility.
Ever since then, you've been losing your mind trying to force your life and train of thought to go back to normal. You’ve done all of the math on it.
Realistically, you can't ignore him. Your lives are so mixed together it'd be impossible unless you went under protection and changed your name which you briefly considered. You thought of turning him down but you’re pretty sure you wouldn’t be able to actually do it despite how good you are at keeping it in. Either way, your best option logistically is feigning ignorance and trying to keep the whole thing out of your mind entirely which should've been easy.
Tricking yourself into believing the whole thing was a dream? Lightwork.
Except. Except.
Umemiya just won't give up.
He confesses to you again every single day. Worse, he doesn't care whose around to hear him. No one in your friend group seems even the tiniest bit shocked by it which doesn't help the situation. You can't get used to it, can't get used to him being so fucking cheeky as he stops you midway through normal conversation to tell you he loves you.
He's persistent to a fault and while you've done well feigning immunity - you can't survive like this.
You've graduated to tell him to go away and treating the whole thing like some big joke.
But honestly?
You're avoiding having a proper conversation about it. Umemiya is especially keen in not letting you forget that. And determined to make you confess.
But you're not going to to let him sway you.
You've got principles, after all.
__
After you close up shop on Friday, you get dressed to attend a kickback with all of your friends.
It's a barbecue technically - commemorating the end of summer. Togame is really into grilling and in their weird domestic partnership, Chouji really enjoys hosting. They've done this once or twice a year ever since they started living together.
Once you've finished cleaning up the store, you take the train to Kotoha's place - mistakenly assuming you'd leave as soon as you got there. However you failed to realize that Tsubaki and Kotoha would be getting ready together.
You got jumped as soon as you walked through the door - so now you're wearing a different pair of clothes that Tsuabki got for you and waiting for them to finish getting you dressed up so you can leave.
Tsuabkino is inches from your face while Kotoha braids your hair. You feel itchy and exposed but with both of them here there's no way you're going to get out of wearing it.
"Can we just go?" You grumble, not enjoying the feeling of being poked and prodded.
"No," Tsubaki insists, frown making her expression pinch. "You have half an eyelash on. Sit still."
"He'll be happy to see you dressed up," Kotoha adds, trying to encourage you. You frown and look down.
"Whatever. I don't care about makin' him happy."
The both of them pause and stare at you until you fold under the pressure - screwing your eyes shut and making you flush.
“Such a blatant lie.”
Tsubaki giggles. “Right?”
Your face feels hot. "Ahhh, alright already. Shut up."
"Honest girls are much cuter," Tsubaki coos. You give her a half-assed glare.
"Don't you like Hajime? Why're you trying to set me up with him still?" You mumble. You always think they’d make a perfect pair.
"Of course I like him. He's my prince." She smiles at you. “But it’s a little different to how a certain someone loves him. And well, if you knew the way he looked at you…"
You frown, feeling hot all the way up to your ears as you ball your fists up and look down at your lap. "Whatever."
"You should stop trying to worm your way out of it," Kotoha adds, much less sweetly. "You know how he is. He couldn't give up on you for ten years like some idiot."
You blink. "Huh? But ten years would mean -"
Kotoha braids your hair even tighter making you wince. "I know. You're both stupid like that."
"Don't be mean, Kotoha-chan. And you, be a little more honest, okay?"
You sigh deeply.
"Ain't like anything is gonna happen either way. I already told you both I'm not accepting his confession,"
"Cause you're a huge wuss, yeah we know."
You elbow Kotoha lightly.
"Maybe nothing will," Tsubaki hums mischievously. "But it feels nice to dress up for him, right?"
You pretend the thought doesn't make your hear flutter.
Tsubaki does you the kindness of laughing lightly before moving on.
__
You arrive to the function an hour later than planned and stick mostly with Kotoha and Tsubaki until half way through the evening.
Loosening up with a few drinks, the three of you part ways to catch-up with different people. It's not rare you see them, but it's not often everyones schedules allow them to be in the same place.
Lucky for you, Umemiya does you the courtesy of not confessing during the first half of the night before food comes out.
(Though you do spit beer in his face after he calls you pretty, which he takes on the chin after cleaning up.)
After dinner, the function simmers down significantly. People quietly break off into groups and chat to each other into the late night. About that time people split whatever desserts they brought among guests.
You brought cookies and something specifically for Chouji and Togame as thanks for hosting.
Towards the end of the night, you find yourself sticking sort of close to Umemiya. Though he's having his own one-on-one conversation with Hiragi while sitting next to you , turned the other way.
You busy yourself catching up to Suo, Sakura and Nirei - all of whom you consider yourself close to.
Of them, you're the closest to Nirei which always surprises people.
The kids a total wimp but he helped you years ago study to graduate so you're a little closer to him than everyone else. He's a great guy though and you hang out alone sometimes too.
The conversations gone far left at this point in the evening.
Suo leans back against his chair and looks toward Sakura besides him with a lazy smile.
"Sakura-chan would make a great wife."
You snort listening to them bicker. Sakura grows beet red, throwing an empty beer can at Suo's head that he catches gracefully.
"Go die."
"What? You're good at domestic work and you have a cute side, Isn't that all you need?"
"Shut up. I'll kill you."
As Suo breaks out into laughs, Sugishita comes down from the kitchen just in time to catch the argument. He crinkles his nose up.
"Oh, Sugishita-kun. 'Sup."
He nods to your greeting as he leans against the wood railing of the outdoor deck.
"What the hell are you two talking about?"
'What? You mean about Sakura being a good wife?" Suo asks. Sugishita crinkles his nose.
"Don't phrase it so repugnantly but yeah I guess."
"We were talking about marriage 'cause I was complaining at work."
"What's happening at work?"
Nirei sighs as he lays it out again to Sugishita after having given the spiel to the three of you once.
"One of my superiors at work is a lot older than me and keeps bringing up marriage," Nirei explains woefully. "It's all he talks about. He thinks I'm seeing someone."
Sugishita frowns. "Eh? What gave him that impression?"
A good question you hadn't considered asking.
You raise your brow at Nirei who laughs awkwardly while he holds your gaze.
"You know that picture of us from highschool? When he came to the cafe at your school festival?"
You smile spitefully, crinkling your nose in faux distaste. "The one wear we wearing those stupid maid costumes?"
"Yup. That's the one. It's a good picture of us so I keep it on my desk and he saw it so..."
"You keep a picture of just the two of you on your desk? No wonder he got that impression.” Suo adds.
You sense Umemiya suddenly tense which you find weird. He's still talking to Hiragi though when you glance from the corner of your eye. You brush it off.
Nirei blushes, elbowing him.
"Shut up. I've got group pictures and stuff too. But he just singled out that one cause you know,"
You nod in understanding before it dawns on you. Your eyes widen. "Oh, shit? Does that old man think you're dating me?"
Nirei closes his eyes and sighs. "He won't even let me correct him."
You pause before breaking out into genuine laughter.
"Pfft, that's terrible." You reply sympathetically, taking a sip of your beer before giving a mischievous grin. "Maybe you can make it work for you though, eh? Tell 'em we got hitched forreal and then I'll call you on the phone and nag you to get home for dinner so you can leave earlier."
Nirei acts like he's touched making you laugh even harder. "You'd do that for me?"
You give him another toothy grin. "I'll even help you fake some wedding photos. We'll be accomplices." You lean back with a shrug. "You gotta wear the dress though."
Sugishita laughs at that. "You being a blushing bride is a little..."
You snort, shooting him a dirty look "Shut up."
"Deal. Not a bad plan honestly." Nirei says with a sigh. "Whatever gets me out of the office early."
"Even if that means being married to me?" You joke.
He smiles at you. "Aw, what do you mean? That's the best part."
You chuckle at him good-natuedly and the conversation quickly moves on.
The alcohol is starting to make you dizzy so you eventually tune out as the four of them talk, glancing at Umemiya from the corner of your eye.
You swear you catch a glimpse of his jaw ticking.
__
For the rest of the night, Umemiya is off.
No one else can tell. You know that because the atmosphere remains light until everyone leaves around two-am. There's no blips or tension, no awkward pauses.
But you know Umemiya. He's been real weird all night and it's bugging the shit out of you.
It's a well past two now, and you've just left the late night cab you took with him. Umemiya lives close so he's walking you home.
He's usually energetic after a get-together like that so his dead silence is weirding you out. You're pretty good at figuring his feelings out but for once you feel totally clueless.
It feels as if even the cicadas and crickets have gone to sleep. There's nothing bu the streetlights overhead and soft glow of the moon, coupled with the soft click of your shoes on the pavement. Occasionally, a car will pass by.
At one point, it becomes too much. There's still a few minutes until you're home.
You stop in the middle of the sidewalk and turn around to look at him. Umemiya pauses, startled as he stops with you, and doesn't smile which only makes your concern worsen.
"Oi. What's up with you?"
"Hm?"
You cross your arms over your chest.
"Don't 'hm' me. You've been in a bad mood few for the last few hours. It's gonna bug me all night if I don't ask, so what's up?"
He stares at you.
"You noticed?"
"How could I not notice?"
"I was hiding it pretty well, I thought." He states more than asks, half-smile on his face.
"Yeah. But well," You shrug. "I'm always looking at you for better or for worse. So. What's wrong?"
He stares at you a long time before sighing, running his fingers through his hair. You've never seen him like this. You've seen him pissed off before, seen him mildly irritated - but never this... pouty? It's not like he's pissed.
He's quiet, taking a deep breath of cool night air before sliding his hands into his pockets and taking a good look at your face.
"Do you know that I like you?"
Your eyes widen as you blink wildly.
This is what he wants to talk about?
He pins you down with his stare, hands in his pockets and intense as ever.
"Don't even think about bolting this time, okay? I'm asking you seriously. Do you?"
Your eyes flicker down the concrete - feeling extremely uncomfortable and suddenly sweaty. You shrug, unsure of what else you could say or do.
"Hard not to know." You mumble. "You tell me everyday."
"But do you get it?"
Your frown deepens.
"Of course not. How could I possibly get something like that, stupid?"
He takes a deep breath. "But you like me, don't you?"
Panic sets in. If you could sink straight into the Earth you would.
"...Never said that."
He calls your name quietly. "Look at me, at least. Stop running away from me and just look."
You know you're being stubborn but you can't help it. You've kept it a secret for ten years and all of a sudden he wants you to tell him you like him? You've held it in for so long already and he's telling you not to run away.What other choice is there?
One wrong move move and everything will come crashing down inside of you. You can't even lie about it either.
Damn it.
"I won't look." Your voice is warbly and it makes you feel so pathetic you could die, tucking your chin petulantly "Don't wanna,"
Umemiya frowns at you.
"If you say you don't like me I'll let it go."
You remain very quiet and close your eyes tighter. He sighs softly, making your chest hurt.
After a minute, you muster up the courage to be dishonest - determined to drop it at all costs. You're slow as you pick your head up.
"I don't like you," You repeat slowly, carefully - trying not to stumble the words. "So quit it, alright?"
He laughs humorlessly and holds your gaze.
"That's the first time you've ever actually lied to me. You're terrible at it,"
"I'm not lying." You snap. Umemiya smiles somberly when he sees tears on the corners of your eyes. He steps closer to you. You freeze. When his hand reaches cups your cheek, you feel your legs lose all their strength and close your eyes. You're terrified to even look at him, not wanting him to see what you know is obvious on your face.
He wipes them as he tilts your face towards him slowly.
"Tell me, at least. If you're going to refuse me, don't I deserve to know why? Do you hate the idea of dating me that much?"
You shake your head. "Stupid. How would anyone hate that?"
"So I deserve to know why you're turning me down."
A long moment of silence draws you out of your feelings. You guess that's fair enough. Maybe this way he'll leave you alone - as long you're clear about your reasons. He’s the earnest type after all.
You manage to suck up all your tears and clear your throat enough to give him an explanation.
You step back a little from him, putting some distance between you as you stare down at the sidewalk.
"You know... I respect ya more than anyone else. You've always been someone I admire. And I uh, owe you a lot. So I only want the very best for you and all." You scratch your neck, taking a deep sigh. "For me... regardless of my feelings, I want you to be with someone who really fits, you know? Well put-together and everything. Someone that suits you better"
He pauses before frowning.
"Regardless of your feelings? Does that mean you were willingly pushing them aside?" He says distraught. "For how long?"
You shrug, trying to lighten the conversation. It’s too devastating otherwise. "About ten years, give or take."
The sheer distress in his face makes you want to keep talking, just he doesn’t look so disheartened. Like some explanation will clear things up.
"It ain't a bad thing, Hajime. You've given me a lot and I'm serious when I say I want the best for you. I love you, if that's what you wanna hear. I'm content just being besides you as your friend." You say with a shrug. "I can be kinda selfish but there's a limit to my greed,yknow."
He looks like he's in shock.
"Wanting someone to love you back isn't greedy or selfish."
You find you don't have anything to say with that, but hope he drops it for the time being.
Umemiya stares at you seriously. It makes your breath hitch meeting his eyes, blue with all the depth in the world. You feel like you can't pull yourself from his gaze.
"And there was never a possibility? Not once that I could've liked you? That I wanted to be with you?"
"It doesn't matter." You say. "And no, it never crossed my mind.."
"Stop saying it doesn't matter. Of course it matters. Your feelings matter the most so don't toss them aside so easily. Do you really believe that you're not right for me?"
You aren’t sure how to answer him.
"You think you're not good enough for me." He says with some realization more than asks.
It's the first time you see his face change. When you look up, he looks well and truly angry. The whole thing is confusing.
"I'm sorry," You say. It’s such a timid thing to say but you don’t know how else to fix.
"It's not—I just don't like hearing you talk about yourself like that. I don't like hearing someone I love get spoken about like that.”
You ignore the sentiment again and wait in the quiet. You always thought this would be an easier conversation to have but it hurts.
He sighs a bit, getting closer to you again. He’s less upset than before but there’s something else in his expression.
"You wanted to know why I was upset earlier right? It's because of you and Nirei-kun." He admits.
"What about him?"
"You talked about marrying him so casually. I overheard and it bothered me all night."
Your eyes go wide.
"I—it wasn't serious."
"I know that. I never thought I was that childish either but you being married to someone else as a joke." He laughs humorlessly. "I really hated it. That’s why I asked if you know how much I like you."
You feel frozen in place by his admission.
Umemiya steps towards you faster than you can muster up a counter for why he shouldn’t bother.
His arms around you feel sudden. His grip on you is so tight, like you could slip through his arms all at once if he loosens it. He smells like cologne and beer and summer but it's not unpleasant. He rests his chin on your head and lets out a deep breath.
Your chest is throbbing for different reasons now. Shit. Shit, shit, shit.
"If you won't be greedy, then you should at least let me be." He lets out a long, tense breath "At least let me have what I want."
You're stuck. Your mouth moves faster than your brain.
"Why me? And why now?"
Umemiya pulls away to stare down at you. You can't bring yourself to turn away from him.
"It was always you. I felt guilty... for wanting to you that way when you were a precious friend. Wanting to treat you delicately when you were strong and proud." He admits. Hearing him say that out loud embarrasses you to no end, “But it was those things that made me love you. Strong yet clumsy. Prideful yet honest. Awkward yet trying to be gentle. Loyal. And always considerate of everyone. Of me, when I was taking care of everyone else."
Your stomach feels like it's going to erupt. You're losing your resolve faster than you know how to mend it.
"Stop saying stuff like that."
Umemiya holds you tighter and shakes his head. "No. How else will I get you to change your mind?"
"I won't change my mind." You say stubbornly.
"I love you." He repeats.
You squirm.
"Stop it,"
"I want to be with you. I want to kiss you. I want to hold you. I want to stay by your side forever. I want to do things with you and make you feel good. I want to make you smile. I want to grow old with you."
Your hearts fluttering. Fuck.
"Idiot. What are you saying? Let me go."
"It has to be you for me. I won't have anyone else no matter what you think. The person I love is you. I love you."
"Hajime." Your voice is shaking.
His drops down to a whisper.
“I can’t change how you think of yourself overnight but I can tell you that there’s no point in trying to push me away. Whether or not you accept me, we’ll never stop being side by side - so please stop fighting it.”
You put your hands on his chest, trying to push him away. “Stop it,”
"Please tell me it's okay to love you how I want too," He says, soft and doting while he crushes you in his arms. "And please love me in return."
You put your hands up to your misty eyes wanting to wipe them away as he melts through the rest of your resolve like it's nothing. It's hard not to be moved. You've been pretending for ten long years that you don't love him at all and he's declaring his love for you like it's the easiest, most sensible and sane thing in the world.
A kind-hearted, willful, meddling idiot. How you are you supposed to push him away when he's holding you this tight?
"Shit," You voice, huffing as your voice shakes. "Don’t be stupid, alright? If you’re so insistent, I wont let you back out if you meet someone else."
He laughs wetly.
"I already tried meeting other people, but it's still you. Always was."
He smiles above you. 6'2 with watery eyes with the look of pure relief like it's the best news he's ever heard in his life. It's too much for you. Your heart is racing so fast you wonder if you're gonna die.
"Can I kiss you?" He asks.
Your eyes go wide as you look away, not wanting to look too eager. "That's..."
He makes another puppy-dog kinda face. "Please?"
You're embarrassed by how easy it makes you give in. "...Do whatever you want."
He laughs bright and warm as his hands slide up to cup your cheeks and kiss you with all the passion he can muster. It's intense, almost suffocating the way he slots his lips against yours and breathes you in. He doesn't let you up from it, doesn't part from you for a second even when he pulls away - noses brushing and stealing the air from your lungs.
It's your stupid first kiss and it's perfect - so perfect you wonder if you're going to wake up in a dream. He kisses you hard and makes you stand on your toes to chase his lips when he pulls back. Elated. Ecstatic when you grasp the front of his shirt and keep kissing him when he stops.
He pauses before littering your whole face with pecks even as you weakly protest, unable to stop frowning but feeling the happiest you've ever been.
There's so much longing in between you, you feel like you could die. You feel helpless.
"Can I come home with you?" He asks, once he stops - only holding your hand a short distance away. "I want more time together."
You feel your skin burn hot as you nod, all while trying not to read too much into it.
"Yeah."
__
You barely get to lock your door behind you before Umemiya crowds you in the door way.
His arms circle around your waist, chin resting against your shoulder.. Broad chest against your back, you try not to flounder as his warm voice caresses your ear.
You're going to die young if he keeps this up.
"I love you,"
You flush. "Enough already. And let me go so I can wash up."
"Do you need to sleep early? Thought you were closed tomorrow. Wanted to talk a little longer."
You pause.
"...Sleep?"
"Hm?"
You both freeze as the miscommunication dawns at the same time. You try to pull away from him as soon as you realize, skin burning hot. You're quick but Umemiya is quicker.
"Hajime." You say gravely. "If you don't let me go, I'm gonna kill you."
"No way," He laughs as you attempt to wriggle out of his grasp. "Is that why you let me in? Were you expecting something?"
"Shut up! Don't say anything, I swear I'll —"
"Don't be like that, baby. I'm not making fun of you. Hey, turn around. Look at me."
You're upset but you think the reason is more embarrassing then the feeling.
"Don't wanna,"
Umemiya laughs as he gently turns you around to face him. In your utter mortification, you can barely bring yourself to meet his gaze.
"Stop staring."
He doesn't.
"Do you normally invite guys in just 'cause they ask?"
"Wha—no! It's because it's you, stupid!"
He smiles in satisfaction.
"You shouldn't say yes so easily even if it is me. What if I took advantage of you?"
You think he's just being smug for the sake of it, which is pissing you off. You grab him by the front of his shirt.
"Fuck off. Maybe there's a reason I said yes."
He pauses before his eyes widen. You push your hand against his mouth before he blurt anything else out but he's quick to pry your hand away.
"Don't say it." You hiss.
"I was planning on taking my time. I cherish you and I want to make sure you know that. I'm just a little surprised you’re moving so quick when you were telling me not too long ago."
You can feel the tips of your ears growing hot, feeling even more self-conscious. "Whatever. If we're just going to sleep I still need to wash up."
He keeps his arms behind your back so you can’t move.
"Hey. Didn't say that. It's not like I don't want to do it with you. Just don't want you to regret anything."
You give him an flat look. "I was prepared to give you my virginity and you're worrying about that. Unless you're planning on backing out, there's no way I would."
"Your—" His jaw drops a little.
You drop your voice down just a little close as you grab his collar.
"If you get it, then hurry up and fuck me. Stupid Hajime."
He gives you the dopiest smile you've ever seen while your face grows increasingly hot, leaning to in to press a kiss to your lips. He brushes his nose with yours. Laughter from deep in his chest.
"Yes, ma'am."
__
Once you give Umemiya permission to have you, you get the feeling that there really is no going back from here.
You both know it. The tension in your bedroom is so thick you can barely breathe around it.
Umemiya lands gently onto your bed - sitting up as he holds you by your waist and pulls you over to him. You're so aware of his touch it makes your nerves feel they're on fire. You're not a total virgin - at least not enough to be feeling this worked up over someones hands lingering on your waist.
But they're Umemiya's hands—Hajime's hands, so you can't rationalize your thoughts of out it. His hands are strong and big, a little calloused and rough from the gardening and fighting. You can feel how much he adores you in a gesture so small it makes you concerned for your own heart thinking about how the rest of the night will go.
He invites you into his lap gently, so pleased by the way you go to him so willingly. You spread yourself over him with your knees on either side of his thighs. He's big - wide and broad.
Your barely hovering over his bulge as you lean your weight onto him. His hand barely brushes underneath your top, just barely touching the skin.
You shiver.
"Are you really sure this is what you want?" He asks. "I don't mind waiting as long as you need,"
You give him an bored look. "Not very convincing when you're makin' a face like that,"
He chuckles nervously. "That bad?"
You nod before adding a little bashfully. "Dunno if I mind, though."
He buries his fact against your chest all of a sudden making you jump.
"The hell?"
"You're so cute when you're honest like that," He mumbles into your chest, cheek pressed against your tits.
"Jeez, shut up. What're you talking about?"
Umemiya pulls back and leans forward - enough to breach the inches of space between you. Nose to nose, your eyes meet. A bated breath, you put your hand on his shoulders and work up the nerve to kiss him.
It's chaste. Mostly for you to break the ice otherwise you're sure you're gonna pussy out.
He smiles at you when you pull away.
"See what I mean? So cute," He hums, and leans in again. "Come on. Kiss me again."
Something about him is different when he tells you to kiss him. It's not smug or cheeky. But it's not casual either. Softness tinges his words, his touch - his whole demeanor screams like he loves you absolutely. It makes your heart rate pick up again, hands shaky as you try not to lose your nerve.
He's restraining himself though. How he intense he could be vs how soft and calm he is being. You know Umemiya like the back of your hand so you want him to do what he wants. It's hard to find your voice.
"You don't have to.." You cast your eyes down in embarrassment. "…hold back with me, either. I'm not some maiden."
He smiles at you a little. "You really do know me better than anyone, huh? I was keeping it together pretty well."
"Look I know I’m kinda difficult…I'm not real good with stuff like this either," You fidget with the collar of his shirt with your free hand. "But once I say yes I don’t back out. So don't worry about scaring me off or putting too much pressure on me or whatever. ...'s fine to just do what you feel like. I’m scared out of my mind but I wouldn’t do that to you,"
“Don’t know how long it’ll take but I’ll do my best to make you feel secure. Might take some time but we’ve got our whole lives.” You flush at the implication. He smiles a little. "Whatever I want seems like a lot to give, though."
"Well...depending on what, I'm might not be good at it,"
He shakes his head. "I don't want anything like that."
"What do you want then?"
"You." He says easily. Your stomach flips. "All of you. I just want to make you feel so good you can't stand it. Want to worship you top to bottom. There's not a single part of you I don't want."
You flush. "The hell... I meant like a blowjob or some shit."
He laughs. "I know. And I want that too, another time." He hums, taking a deep breath. "Right now I just want you to feel so good for me. Is that okay?"
You can't look at him. You can barely stand how bashful you're being, but you can't even play coy. Something in you is bursting at the seams.
You love him so much you don't recognize yourself, or your voice, or how you're acting. It makes you sick but you can’t do anything but go with it. "Yeah. 's okay, if it's what you want."
"It is," He says, leaning in. "All I've ever wanted."
You ignore the latter half of his comment as he finally goes to kiss you again.
He pulls your body close to him as you do. Until your chest to chest, arms wrapped around the span of his shoulders as you press your lips together soft and slow.
He slides a hand underneath your top, undoing the clasp of your bra. He lets his palm stay on the center of your back while you keep kissing - straps of your bra falling down your shoulder as he splays his fingers to feel more of your skin and hold you. Hugging you close to him, his other arm wraps around your torso. His forearms feels especially strong they way they hold you by the waist.
You're so close to him. Kissing him so deep, his tongue sliding against your lips. Something about the kiss is languid but the touch is so hot it makes your skin burn. You feel wrapped up in him, can't even tell whose heartbeat you're hearing.
More of your weight ends up in his lap as you feel your knees go weak. Something hard presses against your clothed cunt and you gasp a little into his mouth.
"Oh, shit." You mumble in surprise. Umemiya laughs.
"You're making me feel good." He hums.
Your face heats up. "I barely did anything."
"You just being on my lap is more than enough."
You make a face at him before rubbing yourself over the zipper of his jeans, slow and deliberate trying to get a feel for it. You hear him moan, nearly jumping out of your skin in surprise.
The way Umemiya moans is a lot for you to process. Breathy and a little low. It resonates through your whole body like a caress.
You make a few more tentative passes over his bulge, just to hear him do it again. Driven by your instinct more than anything, you lean into kiss at his jaw - making use of the limited experience you do have to try and draw more sounds from him.
"What're you thinking about?" He asks, still breathless. Maybe amused.
"Like the way you sound." You mumble in reply.
"I thought I told you I wanted to take care of you, hm?"
You frown. "So what? I can't touch you at all?"
He thinks on it. "You can touch me everywhere else and you can have your way with me later, if you want it. I don't wanna cum too fast."
"I'm just..."
He shakes his head. "You're underestimating me. I'm still a guy, you know? With a woman I love at that. There's no way I would make it through our first time if I didn't focus on you. Don't pout,"
Hearing him describe you in such an embarrassing way makes you flush. You roll your eyes half-heartedly. "Fine, whatever."
He smiles.
"Good girl. C'mere. Lay down."
You decide not to think about how effected the praise makes you as you comply.
Umemiya lays you down carefully, making sure you're comfortable before hovering over you. He looks a lot more imposing from this view - the dim lights of your room making his face seem more well-defined. Your nipples harden in arousal, peeking from underneath your shirt as he stares long and hard.
"You're so beautiful to me."
He leans down and presses a hot kiss to your jaw, just underneath your ear before slowly kissing down your neck. Open-mouthed kisses along delicate skin, tongue sliding over every patch he scrapes lightly with his teeth. You fidget underneath him, a dull throbbing between your legs. You try to figure out what to do with your hands but you’re too nervous.
He kisses your throat where it's extra sensitive and you bite back and involuntary noise.
"Don't hold your voice, please?"
"It's embarrassing,"
"It's not," He assures, bumping his forehead to your shoulder lightly. "I want to know what makes you feel good. Let me pay attention to you."
You frown but nod ultimately.
Umemiya isn't the first sexual encounter you've had in your life. You've done other things, but you've never really gone all the way with anyone. All of your other partners were mostly strangers - people mutually interested in using someone else to try and get off.
This is the first time anyone has taken this much time with you. A little kissing and groping, sometimes touching your chest.
No one's ever touched you like this, though.
His hands feel like they're all over your body no matter where they actually end up being. Makes your heartbeat rain drumming on a tin roof. Makes your stomach tingle, a heat in your calves and a prickly feeling on your back. Your whole being drowning with pure anticipation.
"Take this off for me." Umemiya mumbles. You nod, feeling absent as you wiggle yourself out of your tight little tee and toss it somewhere.
The air shifts again when you're naked. His eyes drink you in, tracing the soft lines and edges of your body. Looking over scars and stretchmarks with pure, blown out wanting that shoots lust straight into your veins.
You want him to fuck you so bad it's killing you but the very thought makes you feel so shy you could die.
"You're beautiful," Sounds dirty the way he says, makes it spill from his lips like wine tipping over a glasses edge. "Perfect. Every inch of you is so perfect."
He proves this to you by kissing you again. Running his hands over your skin. Up against curved sides and down against your arms, brushing the back of your biceps and forearms.
Infatuation in his touch ruins you. Makes your voice let out. You can't think of anyone whose treated you so preciously in your entire life and you find you don't resent it as much as you should.
(You find it feels so good to let someone touch you so kindly. A touch like you're being loved.)
Nonetheless it's embarrassing. Of course it is.
But it's so hard not to feel pulled in when you feel the way he kisses you. Draws a trail with his lips and tongue from jaw to shoulder blade - kissing down your biceps with his hands on your body, taking gentle inhales of your scent.
Anticipation makes your stomach tie in knots but finally he relents. Both hands squeeze the soft weight of your chest, palms brushing your hardened nipples.
"Fuck."
He laughs a little, heavy with want. "Yeah? Do you like being touched here?"
"Mm." Is the best reply you can get out.
He brushes against the tips with his fingers in a feather-light gesture, testing the waters before rubbing with a little more pressure. Your body jolts from the stimulation, wetness pooling and dampening your underwear. He leans in and takes one of your nipples into his mouth making another dull wave of lust wash through you.
And he makes sure to pay attention to both. It's just like him to be so attentive to some shit like that. Your spine arches as he sucks on your sensitive nipples, letting his tongue flick across them and giving into a sweet friction. You buck your hips up against instinctively, gripping onto the sheets as your sense of restlessness grows.
Your voice is whiny to your own ears but you can't calm down to save your life.
"You're taking too long," You huff. He laughs lightly, looking up at you from underneath his lashes.
"Don't be impatient." He tsks.
"It's enough already,"
He shakes his head. "Nope. Still got a long ways to go. Promise you'll have me when you're ready for it, so just try and focus on feeling good."
You make a frustrated sound. "It's embarrassing being the only one feeling good,"
He pauses before standing up on his knees. He takes his black t-shirt off in one swift go until his torso is bare, and undoes the top button of his pants. He gives you a little glance. "Better?"
There are too many layers of that to process in the moment it happens. You mumble. "A little,"
He beams. "Good. Now let me take good care of you,"
Sliding down lower, he kisses you from sternum to navel. Hands gripping at the softness of your sides, smoothing over the bare skin as he his thumb finds the waistband of your skirt. He glances up at you, silently seeking your permission. You nod back at him, watching him slide the short skirt away from your waist.
The sudden air feels cool against your skin. He presses his cheek against your belly, both hands on your hips..
"You're gorgeous. Even more gorgeous than I thought. I feel so lucky being able to touch you when you're this perfect.” He praises endlessly.
You cover your face with your arm.
"Ugh. Quit it. You're sayin' too much."
"Seeing you get so shy when I praise you a little is so cute." He trails his lips down further and further - just above your sex before stopping. "You're so cute."
He sits back, standing up and bending your legs slightly at the knee. You hold the position as you feel him massage your calve. Thumb drawing hard circles in the muscle, slowly working his way up to your knee. He kisses you afterwards trailing the same spot his hands were touching seconds ago before moving onto the other side.
There's nothing you can call it short of worship. The nagging feeling that it's undeserved is washed away each time Umemiya holds your gaze.
Devotion colors every touch no matter how small. And it’s so obvious, so prominent - it feels outright wrong to deny the fact it’s there.
You think the closest thing you can compare it too is the way Umemiya gardens. A patience as his fingers root through earth and soil, a kindness towards delicate things that makes even hours of work under the sun look beautiful and easy. His expression is what's most uncanny - what makes you you feel so hot.
An expression that says he loves doing it from the very bottom of his heart - not even a hint of apathy or complaint.
A face that says he loves every long, drawn out motion and actions of repetition all fro the very core of him.
Having it directed at making love to you so blatantly makes you more aroused than you know what to do with. You don't know how to let yourself be treated like the most cherished flower in Umemiya's garden - and you aren't so sure how you're meant to get used to it no matter how much it makes you feel...nice. You don’t have any other experience.
Which is why you're trying to be patient. Trying to be at least temporarily secure in whatever he sees in you that makes him worship every inch of you, memorizing all your ins and outs.
Umemiya places hot, wet kisses on your inner thigh before laying himself between your spread legs - breath barely hovering over your sex.
By the time he gets there, you feel utterly melted into your sheets. Your mind is hazy, impatient and wanting as strong hands secure your thighs. He's so close.
"I wanna eat you out. Is that okay?"
"If you don't do something soon I'm gonna kill you."
He laughs warmly. "I'll take that as a yes."
You pause. Umemiya waits.
"I didn't uh," You clear your throat. "Wasn't planning on getting laid so y'know. Haven't shaved in a while."
"Were you worried that I'd change my mind? I like it for the record. Feels natural." Umemiya says. "It's your body so there's nothing I would dislike about it."
"You're too much." You reply back in earnest. You cover your face with your arms. "So cheesy."
"I'm being serious." He says suddenly solemn with how sincere he is.
The sudden change is amusing. You pause before breaking into genuine giggles, unable to help yourself.
"You're really somethin', yknow that?"
He's quiet for a long time. Long enough for it to catch your attention, turning your gaze more clearly towards his face. Swiftly, he pushes himself up to catch your mouth in another kiss. It stuns you a bit, very different to all the rest. More teeth and tongue than lip.
"I like you," He murmurs, forehead to yours. "How can someone be so cute?"
"Would you quit embarrassing me and get on with it?"
He smiles. "As you wish,"
Umemiya settles back down between your legs after easing your panties off and putting your feet flat on the bed to give himself more access. You can barely look down at him doing it. His fingers brush the slick hairs back gentle as he uses his thumbs to spread your pussy apart and look at you more intimately.
You can feel him. Feel his every breath and movement. He stares at you awestruck. "How is all of you so pretty? Even here it's such a beautiful color."
"Stop looking so much,"
He takes a breath, taking in your scent one more time before pressing a kiss to your clit. You make an attempt to squirm away from his grip as his finger dig into your thighs and hold you down. The strength of it knocks the wind out of you, forcing you into place. Umemiya pushes his tongue and gives you a long, tentative lick through the seam of your cunt.
Your whole body breaks out into shivers at the sensation. The warm weight of his tongue on your sex makes feels like an electric current through water - your toes curling as he makes the same few passes over and over. He collects your pooling arousal on the tip as he drags upwards and flicks your clit tentatively. You grind against his face instinctually, hips chasing the pleasure. Amused laughter vibrates against your core as you do, mumbling at you to be patient while he's still face deep in it.
You let out another pitchy whine before he finally stops teasing. He lays his tongue flat against your clit, cupping it lightly before drawing it around experimentally. He watches carefully as he plays around with pressure and angles - trying to see what makes you react the most. You can feel how closely he's watching you.
You cover your mouth with your hand when he does find it, your voice breaking off as he licks carefully right where you need. He smiles into your cunt as he toys with your with the sensitive bundle of nerves, pleased by the change in your reactions. The obvious pleasure he's making you feel.
Something blooms into your chest. You've never—
"You're—" You close your eyes, hands tangling in the sheets as you break out into a fever. "Ngh, never had someone l-lick me,"
He must've heard you because he seems to laser in his focus the minute you say it. He's lapping at your clit so deep, licking precisely and holding you with nose against your bush.
You reach down tentatively, pushing back the hair falling in his face and he gives you a look so lovesick you want to run away. The pressure changes gradually, more intensely.
It feels better somehow. Makes you feel restless. Your whole body curls in tight with want at the sensation of it, the lower expanse of your belly tensed. You're shaking as you drift closer to the edge, arousal upped by the wet sound of him sucking your clit.
"Hajime," You warn, spine starting to arch as you helplessly try to pull away from the intense sensation. It's not familiar to your body, so much so your mind can barely make sense of what's happening to it, "Cumming—c-cumming!"
Something in you goes undone as Umemiya keeps pace during your orgasm. All the tension inside of you suddenly comes loose - specks of white matter behind closed lids as you screw your eyes shut. Your back curves up into arch, your hips trembling, your insides pulsing. It comes running into you, crashing into your body as waves of pleasure drown out the noise in your head. He eats you out until you feel borderline hysterical.
You feel melted and reshaped by him - yanking him off when he continues to be insistent after you're too oversensitive. He laughs when you pull him away, resting against your thigh as you take worn out heaving breaths.
He kisses the inside of your knee as you calm down, bright smile on his features - painted pink with a slight flush. "You came. I'm so happy."
You look at him in shock. "You're a scary guy."
He pushes up to kiss your temple, voice soft. "Did I scare you?"
Your stomach flutters, tucking your chin. "You were intense, but I didn't... hate it or anything."
"Yeah?" He grins, pressing a few kisses to your cheek and face before whispering against your ear. "Then, is it okay to go farther?"
You nod silently. Umemiya smiles.
He stands up on his knees, pushing his hair back as your eyes are drawn to his pants. You reach out for the waistband of his pants unthinkingly, hooking your finger into it. "Isn't it stuffy?"
He blinks, frozen before rubbing a hand across his face. "Ah a bit, but it's fine."
"Take 'em off. Please?"
Umemiya looks unusually distressed by the request, but follows through without another word. You watch him undress - revealing the tight black fabric of his boxer briefs snug against his waist. Your eyes go wide as you see the outline of his cock - head still half hazy. You voice your unfiltered reaction.
"Your dick is so big,"
He laughs breathlessly. "Are you trying to stir me up? What's with you?" He pauses to lay down besides you. You turn to lay on your side and face him a little better. "You're being cute. I'm not used to seeing you so docile."
"Shaddup," You reply half-heartedly. Your body is still on fire but it knocked the wind of you to cum once already. "Your fault."
He grins, a hint of smugness as he laughs. "That's true."
"You gonna fuck me?"
"Mm, yeah. Gotta open you up first or it'll hurt."
"I've put stuff in before. Toys. Should be fine."
"Still wanna play it safe. It's your precious first time after all."
You make a face before pulling him into you, hugging him tight as your whole body breaks out in a shameful flush. "Then hurry up and do it already."
His arms slide underneath where your laying, holding you to him as he hikes one of your legs up. He slides his free hand in over your leg - his forearm holding your thigh. You press your face to his neck and shoulder - hiding your expression. "Guess I should huh? You were always impatient,"
You can barely tell him to shut up, the way your body waits for it. A warbled little noise leaves your mouth as he slides his middle finger through the sticky folds of your cunt - careful as it catches on your hole. Wet and so aroused, the first finger he puts in goes in completely smoothly with no real effort
Umemiya speaks low and soft as he holds you. "I don't know if I can get used to seeing you like this. I'm glad no one else but me ever wil You’re really all I think about lately," He catches the lobe of your ear between his teeth gently. Your head spins. "People misunderstand you because you're prickly, you know? For a long time, only I knew what it felt like to be liked by you. I liked that,"
"Why are you—mmgh,"
He slides another finger in carefully after the first one slides inside of you with no resistance. His voice is so hot against your skin, the low bass of it in your skull as he speaks so close to your ear.
"Don't get me wrong I'm happy seeing you with so many people surrounding you. But I was a little sad too. And it kept getting worse over the years until I couldn’t ignore it. I couldn’t figure out why for a long time and then it clicked,” Umemiya explains. You realize half way delirious this is his real confession. God, you’re gonna kill him. “Suddenly it was all I thought about. I wanted to be special to you. I wanted to monopolize you. It was my first time having thoughts like that,”
Another finger slides into you easily. Umemiyas fingers are so much bigger than yours. Thicker than they are long. The stretch is enough to make you gasp.
“Hajime—“
He curls them up, careful until he finds the spot he’s looking for. Your body reacts, another sensation of pressure as his middle finger rubs tenderly against your gspot. You weakly try to wiggle away as he holds you firm.
“I felt a little guilty, too. You’re my very best friend. You’re independent and diligent. Tough. But you know, when I saw you for those few months - all I could think about was how much I wanted to spoil you,” He whispers. Something in your body shifts the way touches you. Pushes in further and further - stretching until it’s easy for him to be inside. “Somehow everything I liked about you became so cute I couldn’t stand it. I couldn’t help but want to dote on you over every little thing even though I knew better than anyone you didn’t need something like that.”
Your eyes well up but not necessarily from emotion. Totally overwhelmed. You don’t feel like you’re gonna cum but there’s something else that’s waiting and each time he thrusts his fingers into you it comes a little closer. Your voice is shaking.
“It—fuck, quit talking. Somethings gonna—“
His smile grows a little. It’s the first time it looks so hungry.
“I was happy in general when I realized you liked me too. Even when you were being stubborn, I liked the way you couldn’t turn me away. I liked how happy you looked talking to me as usual as if that alone was something so precious,” He hums, so focused and precise as he stretches you open on a third finger but never once losing his train of thought. Like saying all of these comes to him so easily it doesn’t matter. “I didn’t want to corner you. But it felt like I couldn’t rest until you were mine completely. Which is why I’m being so unfair to you. Why I’m so persistent. ”
Your voice breaks on a whine. “It’s gonna come out—“
“You make a pretty face when your heads filled with nothing but me. I don’t think it’s bad to wanna stay that way,” He hums, almost conversational as he presses a kiss to your skin. “Go on. Let go,”
Something hot sprays between your legs as Umemiya fucks you open on all three of his fingers.
A rush of warm liquid squirts onto your sheets as your legs shake wearily. Umemiya marvels at the mess. Your hands curl into fists, nails digging in your palms as he finally pulls them out - leaving you stretched, almost gaping.
You lay limp in soaked sheets as you pull away from Umemiya with a very weak glare.
He’s smiling at you, dopey and lovesick.
“Too much?”
Angrily, you smack at his bare chest over and over, trying to recover your pride.
“You’re insane. What’s,” You swallow thickly. “What’s with you.”
He shrugs. Wordless, he flips you onto your back again before hovering over top of you. Pressing his forehead to yours, he brushes your noses together and plants a tentative peck on your lips as if trying to gauge whether or not you’re upset. He melts when you kiss him back, smiling happily.
“Were you like this with your other girlfriends? No wonder they broke up with you,”
He laughs. “Mm, no? I was more of a gentleman.”
You break out into another exhausted fit of laughter.
“Pfft, yeah? Guess I’m pretty special,”
“Yeah. You are.” He kisses you again. “Wanna keep going or are you too tired? I don’t mind if we sleep.”
“Stupid. I said it already didn’t I? Hurry up and fuck me.”
“Okay, okay. Let me go get the condom from my wallet,”
You wrap your legs around his waist and stare up at him plainly as he tries to move, keeping him pinned in place. You’re frowning, brows furrowed with a hard glare. He stares at you.
“Did you want something else? Water?”
“Want you to fuck me,” You restate, arms reaching up to circle around his neck. “Just do it already.”
He pulls back to look at you seriously.
“Do you know what you’re asking?”
You flush. “Of course I do. Stupid. Are you trying to get me to say it out loud?”
“I might think I’m deluding myself otherwise.”
You sigh, looking at him flatly as you try to tamp down the part of you that’s screaming to be more tactful.
“Don’t bother with the condom, a-alright? Or pulling out,”
He looks like he’s experiencing the shock of his life. “But…”
“Stop being dumb or I’m never gonna have sex with you again.”
He nods suddenly solemn. “Fine. But,”
You give him another look that silences him. He sighs again, getting the message before kissing your cheek and pull back to sit up on his knees between your legs. Pulling his briefs down, his cock springs free. It looks a lot bigger than you saw underneath the fabric, weighed down from it’s own weight even though it stands up stiff. He opened you up with three but you wonder if it’ll be enough not to stretch you open.
You reach your hand out to touch it tentatively, feeling it’s weight and heft. He clears his throat but seems content to let you. The palms of your hands cup the shaft, feeling all the veins pulse. The tip is sticky with precum. You pull your hand away, another sudden wave of self consciousness overwhelming you.
Umemiya hovers over you again, placing he length of his cock against your pussy. You shift a little feeling it slide against you, hard and hot.
“Gonna put it in now, okay?”
Nodding, you put your legs up. You take a deep breath when the head pushes in, letting out an involuntary noise. You feel well-stretched but the thickness of his cock is still enough to make you feel it in your legs. Umemiya is focused above you, barely sliding the tip through your folds as you open up around him. The air feels punched out of your lungs on just the first inch.
His face is strained is he holds his hips steady, leaning down to tap your foreheads together. “Feeling okay?”
“Mm,” You nod, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Fine. Feels different.”
“Different?”
“Yours is bigger than all the stuff I own,” You explain. “Feels hotter. Harder, too.”
You feel his cock twitch inside of you suddenly, shocking you. He smiles sheepishly.
“Gonna push in a little more, okay?”
You nod, watching as Umemiya so slowly presses his cock into you further. Enough that it doesn’t hurt when you take him, as much as it just feels like something is inside of you. You feel a warm sense of satisfaction at how full you feel. You feel like him like he’s in your stomach, taking up so much space. After a while of pushing, stopping, and going again - he finally bottoms out.
“You feel incredible,” He murmurs, half-smile on his face. Your stomach flutters. “It’s hard not to cum right away. Feels so good inside of you. I love you.”
You feel yourself twitch, frowning at the expression of delight Umemiya has. You put your hand against his fact to keep him away but he kisses your palm and moves it. Bottomed out, he grasps both hands and holds them - pinning them to the bed as you watch him wide-eyed.
“Think you’re used to it?” He hums, clasping your fingers together. “Is it okay if I move?”
You feel so damn bashful. “It’s okay.”
He kisses your forehead. “I’ll go slow.”
As promised, Umemiya pulls out carefully before pushing back into you. You’re so wet that it slides in without any real friction. It takes a few thrusts of him going slowly for your body to get adjusted to the sensation. After a few motions, though - it starts to feel different.
Starts to feel good. Really, really good.
“Oh,” Your eyes flutter open. “Shit. You c-can go faster.”
“Yeah?”
You nod, trying not to seem too eager.
When Umemiya picks up pace, you feel your the whole lower half of your body weaken all over again. Something in your legs, your spine go soft against the bed underneath, a sudden unusual arousal swelling. Somewhere in deeper as he cocks thrusts against your gspot, knocking against it with more force than before. The change in pace coupled with the visual of Umemiya over you, face drawn together in focus as he fucks you is too much. Split open on his cock, you can hear how wet you are each time he moves.
“Feels…” Your words come up empty. “’s so much.”
“Yeah? Is it too much for you, baby?”
You shake your head as your thoughts get increasingly cloudy. It’s like there’s nothing else your body can focus on. The way his cock drags against your sensitive, silken walls. The feeling of being full to empty and then full all over again. The way your pussy gets so much wetter each time he moves, sloppy and sucking him in so tight. You can feel your body want for him.
Umemiya lets go of your hands, sliding one between your bodies. Palm resting on your sex, he lets his brush against your clit. The difference it makes is significant, makes your eyes go wide. He smiles a little, hair falling in his face as he pushes it up with his free hand.
“That’s it,” He hums, contented to keep at it like this. “Feels good, right? Your holding onto me so tightly it’s hard for me to pull out even though you’re so wet.”
You make a whiny noise and wonder if other peoples first times feel this good or if you’re just outrageously lucky. You decide on the latter he fucks you faster and matches his thrusts with the movement of his fingers. You’re warm all over - skin scorching as your hands find his biceps and shoulders to cling onto.
Your voice is so whiny when you call out for him “You’re so deep, ngh.”
He laughs, deep and raspy. “Yeah? Tell me what you’re feeling,”
“It feels good when you’re in me.” You reply drunkenly. “Want it faster. Please,”
He complies with your request almost immediately. You cry out loud, physically incapable of holding the sound in as he gets to fucking you faster and harder. Your pussy is throbbing. Senselessly horny, you pull Umemiya closer to you as he fucks you and smash your lips together. You feel so good, so thoroughly fucked and completely out of it. He’s in you but you want him even closer, want the scent of his skin to mark you.
A second time your body builds up to that familiar feeling but it’s so much farther inside. An orgasm pulled right from your core. Stomach tied in knots as Umemiya fucks you hard, you wrap your legs around his waist and take him.
“That’s it. You’re so good. Cum on my cock, sweet girl. Let me feel it” He murmurs against your skin, holding you close. “You’re making me feel so good. So cute. Go ahead, it’s okay. Let me see how good I’m making you feel.”
Pliant to his request, you hold onto Umemiya for dear life as your body gives into second orgasm. Your nails dig into his biceps as the built up arousal gives way pleasure - and you cum hard with his cock sheathed all the way inside of you. All the wind gets stolen from your lungs as you press forward with another kiss, your whole body trembling violently as you let go.
Umemiya sweet talks you through without letting go once, only stopping to take a pause when you’ve fully ridden out your high.
You stare up at him in a daze as he takes a breather to kiss you, still hard as he’s bottomed out inside of you.
“You gonna cum soon?”
“Mm,” He nods. “Yeah I’m close. If I move, I will.”
“’s okay to cum in me,”
Umemiya laughs warmly. “I’m already about too. You’re not helping,”
You smile a bit as you hug him close to you and tell him again that it’s fine. Before long, he holds you too, whispering the same three words into your neck as he finally lets it out. It’s a weird feeling, thick white ropes of seed spilling into the deepest parts of you.
You don’t really hate it, though.
“I love you,” Umemiya repeats. Tired you don’t try to fight yourself.
“Love you too,”
__
The next morning, you’re stirred away by the sound of your front door unlocking and the sound of Kotoha’s voice echoing through your apartment.
You’re still half-way asleep, so it barely dawns on you that anything is off. Not cognizant enough to think twice, your body tries to go back to sleep.
Or it does until you hear a very loud shout coming from your kitchen that wakes you up with a start.
“No fucking way,”
You sit up suddenly, hearing faint conversation before the sound of steps barreling towards your door. You just barely manage to pull the sheets up over your chest before she comes storming through the door of your bedroom.
You watch her eyes scan your entire room, mentally collecting data before she finally lands on you. As your brain starts to load back in, your eyes go wide with horror at the look of pure scandal on her face.
Fuck. You were supposed to be having dinner with her and Tsubaki tonight. Usually you confirm with them in the mornings since your up. It’s not uncommon for her to drop in when you don’t reply to check in since you live close by.
Fuck.
“You—Oh, I have to text Tsubaki-chan, I can’t believe—“
Before she gets to finish her sentence, Umemiya appears behind her in your door way. The sight of him only adds fuel to the flame of your embarrassment. You went another round or two before bed last night and it looks like it too. Shirtless in sweats he left over a while ago, his biceps are covered in scratch and with a few hickies, he’s wearing his hair down with a cup of tea and a very apologetic smile.
You cover your face with your hands unsure of how to deal with the feeling of pure mortification.
Kotoha snaps a picture of your room that causes even more distress.
“If you don’t delete that right now, I’m gonna kill us both.”
“In your dreams.”
Umemiya laughs warmly. “Please don’t kill each other.”
He slides past Kotoha coming over to you. Bending down to kiss your forehead, he pulls the blanket up over you so you’re more well-covered. You give him an incredulous but Umemiya is unfazed - smiling as bright as ever.
“Good morning,”
“I can’t believe my eyes,” Kotoha says. She points at Umemiya. “You, go put on a shirt.”
“Fine, fine. Stay for breakfast,” Umemiya says with a smile. “It’ll be nice having it with my two favorite people.”
You make another face as Umemiya gives you a long, affectionate look before disappearing. She sighs as she looks at you, pinching the bridge of her nose.
“I would ask if you’re gonna meet us for dinner but you don’t have a choice anymore so show up at seven. I’m gonna leave before that tactless idiot comes back. We’ll talk later.”
You nod in understanding. She turns to leave but then turns back with a genuine smile.
“And, well - congrats. He’s a tactless idiot but he does love you or whatever. Cherish each other,”
You flush, nodding your head. “Yeah…thanks.”
With that Kotoha leaves quickly. Umemiya returns still shirtless, pouting a little when he notices she’s gone.
“She left already?”
“Of course she did. I can’t believe you would invite her for breakfast.”
Umemiya shrugs. “No point being coy about it. I thought it’d be nice. I was looking for a shirt but I guess I don’t need one now,” He sits besides you on the bed, turning to face with a goofy smile. “Anyways, good morning.”
“You already said that.”
“You didn’t say it back,”
You frown. “G’morning,”
He smiles suddenly before grabbing you from underneath the blankets and sheets - pulling your naked body ontop of him as he grins. Sunlight pours through the window as he holds you to his chest, kissing the crown of your head before pressing his cheek into your hair.
“Mm, yeah. It’s a really good morning after all.”
“You’re stupid.”
“And you love me,”
You fail trying not to smile. Damn him. You're so happy it hurts. You roll your eyes.
“I guess so.”
#windbreaker x reader#umemiya x reader#windbreaker smut#umemiya smut#writing tag#umemiya hajime x reader#umemiya hajime smut#bro#im sorry if there are still typos i edited this so much
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..⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ Girl Talk
random astro observations 🌸 ..⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
disclaimer: these obs. are pretty general, from personal observation, & just for fun
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⋆.ೃ࿔* capricorn women are hilarious and so charismatic. The maturity of an adult at such a young age. & such supportive energy that manifests as helping you manage or boss UP your life!
⋆.ೃ࿔* pisces sun women are excellent liars... when you're not in your dream world. My childhood Pisces bestie could spin a tale in a second to get us out of trouble! If your feelings weren't in the way, you'd be just as sly as Gemini. Dual energy. You guys are mistreated so often & it pisses me off. Be the villain!! Responsibly, lol.
⋆.ೃ࿔* taurus women are such princesses and material girls. It comes to you guys so easy too! Usually financially sound in life. Venusian energy also attracts earthly gifts.
⋆.ೃ࿔* pluto in the 1st is so potent. My scorpio mars just burns for them🥰 They are always mistaken for a Scorpio. The EYES. They often wear dark palettes as well and the winter spectrum is chef's kiss on them.
⋆.ೃ࿔* virgos are so polished and coordinated. I admire the clean look. No matter what their aesthetic is. I feel like this is bc they master the arts of femininity and their personal style at a very young age. Virgo loves routines & Mercury increases craving for intelligence! the skin! 😍
⋆.ೃ࿔* capricorn men and the pragmatic bit in conversations like ugh. PLEASE be open to what can’t be proven in the physical or isn't "legitimized" science lol. Honorable mention: Pisces sun men lol. they HATE astrology?
⋆.ೃ࿔* aries can literally throw together so many looks. They just know how to put ish on. They are usually average height, if not short and curvy. So, a lot of things work on them. i.e. De'arra Taylor, Toni Olaoye
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⋆.ೃ࿔* sagittarius have such a seductive but edgy sense of style. Jupiter energy expands their tastes, allowing them to try eclectic fashion looks easily sort of like Pisces. Mikaria Janae, Vanessa Hudgens, and IMO Samantha Jones SATC.
⋆.ೃ࿔* leo women are so on trend! They can put their own style on this, but they know how to work the trends.
⋆.ೃ࿔* scorpio too! Like ugh, they are always looking so attractive and coordinated but in unique styles! Like, they are the dramatic beauty type for sure. The type to pull off leopard pants to any occasion🤣 i.e. Karin Jinsui
⋆.ೃ࿔* earth signs are usually blessed materially in some way from childhood. Not saying it was easy.. (not knocking emotional or spiritual tribulations or bad aspects)
⋆.ೃ࿔* scorpio women 🫱🏾🫲🏽 sitting in the pitch black darkness for their "Me Time". Evil lair vibes lol But, this genuinely recharges their energy.
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⋆.ೃ࿔* what's up with aries, libra, pisces, and virgo women being so beautiful but SO blind in love! There's literally no changing someone or waiting on them to mature. If he's not the one now, he won't be the one later. Men are like buses! Miss one and 10 minutes later...
⋆.ೃ࿔* aquarius women really nail the best first impressions that makes others want to be their best friend. As an aqua stellium, I used to legit collect besties and create friend groups.
⋆.ೃ࿔* Speaking of… anyone with Lilith in the 11th house experience literally creating their friend group/ clique and then being kicked out of them?? LOL
⋆.ೃ࿔* virgo men can very calmly destroy one’s confidence. The type to point out the one flaw you HATE.
⋆.ೃ࿔* aqua 🫱🏾🫲🏽 scorpio friendships. ✨
⋆.ೃ࿔* gemini suns can be the villains 100%. I hate to add to the endless slander.. sorry not sorry. Unevolved Geminis are not above ruining your rep with blatant lies, copying you, and even familial betrayal out of envy…FOR FUN. (Not ALL Geminis.. these are shadow traits)
⋆.ೃ࿔* capricorn stellium men are a rare and delicious type. Daddy energy all the way😍
⋆.ೃ࿔* cancer women are often so curvy & naturally pretty. But.. how do you guys stay so cool with toxic exes from years ago, tho? lol
Thank you for reading! ⋆.ೃ࿔*
@thesirenisles | masterlist | If you enjoyed, leave a tip!
All rights reserved. © 2024 The Siren Isles
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#astrology#astrology observations#astro observations#astro#solar return#aries#taurus#gemini#cancer#leo#virgo#libra#scorpio#sagittarius#capricorn#aquarius#pisces#divine feminine#girl blogger#black girl aesthetic#girly aesthetic#satc#girl blog#vampire#pluto#astrological houses
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Go on and possess me
Hi, my name is Ethan Baker. I'm about to graduate this year at my high school. Me and friend, Matthew, are gonna go to the same university so I'm really excited to go. Unfortunately my girlfriend, Betty, is gonna go to a uni in a different state. I really love her and we spoke about long distance, but ever since I mentioned, that I wouldn't go to the same uni as her, I started to feel that she was sort of slipping away from me. I truly love her, so I started working out and even joined the football team. She seemed proud of me, but there was still tension between us. We still want to fix our relationship, but I don't know what else to do.
Monday 7 PM
Ethan was chilling in his room, watching Tiktoks when his sister, Chloe, suddenly stormed into the room with a weird grin on her face.
Chloe:"Sup, twerp"
Ethan:"You need something? No? Piss off."
Chloe got close to him and sat on the bed. "Oh, don't be like that. I come in peace. Actually, I was thinking you could give me a review of my new bra." she took off her shirt and squeezed her breast while looking at Ethan. "It makes them look nice doesn't it?"
Ehtan:"What the fuck, Chloe?!?"
Chloe:"Oh Ethan. How I miss a human touch on my tits. I need someone to fondle them, to kiss them." she got close to shove herself against Ethan, but he moved away quickly and jumped off the bed, clearly weirded out.
Ethan:"What the hell is wrong with you? Are you NUTS?"
Chloe started laughing hysterically, but it wasn't her usual laugh. "Dude, I can't believe I managed to prank you. You should see your face."
Ethan:"Chloe? What is going on?"
Chloe:"Man, It's ME! Matt! I found a ring and I got the power to possess someone. First I possesed our dog and couldn't get out for hours. I really wanted to let you know, but I accidentally possesed Chloe. So I thought I'd mess with you a bit."
Ethan:"This is not possible. If... if you're really Matt, tell me something Chloe wouldn't know."
Matt:"Let's see. Party in the cabin, truth or dare. You were dared to make out with me in front of everyone, but you chickened out. But later in the evening when we were alone and drunk, we made out. But you claimed you're not a homo. Haha."
Ethan:"Fuck. Matt? How the fuck is this possible? Is it reversible?"
Matt:"I don't know, but I managed to get out of our dog, so let's see." Chloe’s face made a grin as if she was really trying to concentrate. Suddenly a figure trying to get out of her body appeared. And after a few seconds Matt stood behind Chloe.
Chloe looked around confused:"How did I get here?"
Matt:"You came to scream at us for being loud."
Chloe:"Right. Yeah, stay quiet you idiots." she left not noticing that her shirt was missing
Ethan:"Why doesn't she care?"
Matt:"Don't know, but I had this feeling after leaving her body, that I can manipulate her memories for a while."
Ethan:"Holy shit. I can't believe it. You have a super power. Can you imagine what we can do with that? You can erase our bad grades as our teacher, you can send us money as some millionaire."
Matt:"Or I can possess a hot chick and you can fuck me."
Ethan:"That's disturbing, man. Besides I am loyal to Betty."
Matt:"Right. The girl that won't allow you to fuck her."
Ethan:"Shut up. At least I have a girlfriend. Let's talk about your power."
The two spend hours in Ethan's room trying to come up with a plan how to improve their lives. Their main concern was to get revenge on a bully, posses teachers to get better grades and maybe later on get some cool stuff as well.
Matt looked concerned:"Ethan, I'm not really sure about possessing a guy."
Ethan:"Why?"
Matt:"Possesing a dog was easy. Your sister was a bit of an accident, but she struggled too. So I'm worried that a strong guy would be able to resist me."
Ethan:"I guess you'll have to try and see."
Matt:"I might have a better idea." Matt looked deep into Ethan's eyes.
Ethan:"No, way. I'm not letting you possess me. I know what kind of a pervert you are."
Matt:"Come on, I need to practice. And what a better chance to do it than fail later on?"
Ethan thought about it for a while. "Fine. But you'll let me see what you're doing or leave me if it won't be possible. Ok?"
Matt:"Deal"
The two of them got up and stood across each other.
Matt had a grin on his face, while Ethan didn't seem really pleased with the idea of his friend controlling his body.
Matt:"Ready?"
Ethan:"Seriously, no touching."
Matt:"Promise"
Matt stepped against Ethan and dived into him. Ethan felt as if some force was trying to pressure him from all sides. He tried to resist, but it was so much stronger.
He didn't know what happened in the following moments, but a flash from his phone "woke him up".
Ethan:"What the... Matt. Matt?!?" he heard his voice, but he didn't see his mouth move
Ethan's body posed in front of the mirror taking a photo with his shirt off
Matt:"Finally. I didn't know how to wake you up. I knew the flash would help."
Ethan:"And my shirt off would help you how?"
Matt:"I thought if I'd do anything you wouldn't agree with, it would wake you."
Ethan:"Right. Am I really suppose to believe that?"
Matt:"Maybe I just checked myself out in the mirror, just to look at your football body. I haven't even got the chance to flex yet. All I noticed was your nice figure and your tight ass jeans. Honestly, looking good bro."
Ethan:"Thanks. At least someone thinks so. Jesus, this is so weird. Seeing my body move without me controlling it."
Matt:"Can you feel anything?"
Ethan:"Yeah, I think I can. So far I felt every movement. But I'm not sure if I can feel everything"
Matt took Ethan's index finger, licked it and pushed it into Ethan's ear.
Both of them felt that disgusting feeling.
Ethan:"Why did you do that?"
Matt:"Now we know you feel everything. But if you wanna be sure, I can push it in your ass."
Ethan:"No! Ok, we know what we needed, right? You can leave me now."
Matt smiled mischievously. "We haven't even had any fun like this. It's the first out of many times we're sharing a body, just imagine what it's gonna be like to get drunk, to eat, to take a shit together, to cum or fuck someone."
Ethan:"You're not doing that in my body. Forget about that."
Matt turned to the mirror again and scanned his body.
Matt:"Honestly. What's up with Betty? You look really great, man. I don't know what her problem is." he finished speaking and started unbuttoning his pants.
Ethan:"What are you doing? We had a deal"
Matt:"Relax. I just wanna check you out in your boxers. See what the deal is about." The jeans felt on the floor.
Matt:"Woah. Look at you. Looking good, Ethan. And check out these guns. I really don't understand that bitch. If I were her, I'd fuck you the first chance I'd get."
Ethan:"Don't talk about her like that. She... she just doesn't know what she wants."
The doorbell rang. Chloe went to answer the door.
Chloe screamed.l:"Ethan! It's Betty."
Matt:"Ooooh, this is gonna be fun. LET HER IN!"
Ethan:"Matt, you have to leave. You can't talk to Betty. You'll screw it up for me."
Matt:"Relax. At least we'll see if it's not you she's worried to have sex with."
Ethan:"Matt, don't you dare. You promised."
Matt:"Shhh. No more talking."
Betty:"Who are you talking to?"
Matt:"Hey, honey. No one. Just talking to myself. What's up?"
Betty:"Ethan. I came to talk to you. I didn't want to do it over the phone."
Ethan:"She's gonna break up with me. Fuck."
Betty:"I really thought for a long time about us, but..."
Ethan felt as if a giant weight was lifted from him. It took him a moment, but he could move again. On his own.
Betty:"... but I decided that we should take next step in our relationship."
Ethan wasn't sure, what happened to Matt, but he was really surprised by Betty's response. "Wait, really?"
Betty:"Yes. I'm ready."
Ethan couldn't believe it. It was finally about to happen.
They collapsed on the bed, embracing each other. Ethan started making out with her, while her body pressed on his hardening bulge. Ethan took off her shirt and touched her breasts. Betty touched his hard dick over the boxers amd then slid her hand in his boxers and started jerking him off. Ethan kissed Betty's neck which caused her to moan.
Betty:"Oh yeah. Fuck me."
Ethan:"You're so hot, Betty."
Betty:"Finger me!"
Ethan was shocked by her new horny attitude, but slid his hand down and pushed one finger in.
Betty:"Ohh yeah. That's the stuff, dude."
Ethan:"Dude?!? Matt?!?" Ethan jumped away from him. "What the fuck?! You can't do stuff like this. To me or Betty. This is not right."
Matt was now enjoying his breasts and looking seductively at Ethan. "You know you want to fuck me, Ethan. I have been a bad, bad girl."
Ethan:"No, not like this. I want you to leave. her body"
Matt in Betty's body:"Fine, but I'm not promising anything else this time." Betty's hand reached out to Ethan. The same feeling, but now much stronger took over Ethan.
Ethan body continued to move over to Betty. "You're so hot, Betty. "
Betty looked around confused. She was shocked as she found her own fingers in her vagina and the other hand fondling her breasts. "What... what happened?"
Matt:"You said you were ready and then you threw yourself at me."
Betty:"I... I have to go. I'm... I'm sorry, Ethan. I can't..." she grabbed her stuff and stormed through the door of Ethan's bedroom.
Matt:"You could at least suck me off. Ah... whatever. We don't need her, right Ethan?"
Matt closed the door and approached the mirror.
Matt:"Look at us, Ethan. We are so hot. The abs, the nipples. The hairless body. The muscles. We can have anyone. We can fuck anyone."
Ethan:"Matt, stop this. I know the power is taking over your mind. But I can help you control this. Just leave my body."
Matt:"Ethan, don't worry. I won't do anything you wouldn't do, man. I'm still your friend." an evil grin appeared on Ethan's face.
Matt:"Have you thought about gay sex, Ethan? You would be really popular in the gay community."
Ethan:"You just said you wouldn't do anything I wouldn't..."
Matt:"That's why I'm asking. I'm just checkinh what my options are right now."
Matt:"Well, we still haven't had proper time to explore our new shared body together, right?"
Ethan:"Matt, you have a great body of your own. Or you could take over someone else. Some jock maybe."
Matt:"But I'm you now. I want to get us to know each other better. Don't you want to be better friends? I mean. I could possess your sister again. That would be more fun."
Ethan:"Ok, fine. You can stay. But be respectful. No exploring in my body. I can see you moving my hand close to my dick every second. And stop looking at my body. It's creepy."
Matt turned around from the mirror. His head tilted to the side. "You're no fun, Ethan. We could already be jerking off your nice dick, instead we're having a fight here."
Ethan:"It's really creepy, man. Like... what if I would do the same to you in your body?"
Matt:"That's sounds hot. Come on, man. You know you're excited to try it out."
Ethan didn't reply, which Matt took as an approval and threw off his briefs. As soon as he did he looked back at his reflection.
Matt:"God daaaaaamn, Ethan. Look at yourself. You're a hot piece of meat. It feels amazing to have your body."
Ethan:"...thanks, I guess"
Matt:"And let's take this little guy for a spin."
Ethan:"Yet I'm bigger than you."
Matt:"Bigger, but not the biggest I saw. Oh wow, you're a grower I didn't expect that, it's really getting bigger and it's so hard, oh my god. You should shaved Ethan. It would make it look even bigger."
Ethan:"Matt, this is too gay for me. I don't think I want to continue."
Matt:"Hold on, I'm just about to start." Matt started stroking Ethan's dick. He went slowly first, but the built up hormones in Ethan's body forced him to go faster. Ethan felt a wave of pleasure hit him too. He didn't jerk off very often, so this was pleasant and even more so that someone else was doing it to him, for him. Someone was really appreciating his body.
Ethan:"Fuuuck. Matt. Go faster."
Matt smiled. He sped up and started humping Ethan's palm to the rhytm. Matt couldn't keep his hands off his new body. He kept returning back to his muscles, but what interested him the most were his new sensitive nipples. He stroked them while jerking off.
Matt:"Ethan. I love... your body so much"
Ethan:"I love having you in me too. I want to cum with you. Make me cum, please!!!"
Matt went closer to the mirror. The furious movements of the hand forced him to moan out loud. He was so close.
The stream was impressive. It reached a height that Matt didn't even expect and landed on the mirror.
Matt smiled, all sweaty:"Wow. You're quite a good shot. I would have gone further away from the mirror if I had known that."
Ethan felt the clarity earlier than Matt. He just let his best friend jerk his body off. This was so strange.
Ethan:"So what's the plan for tommorow? Who do you want to possess first?"
Matt:"We should try Jack and bully all his friends as a revenge. What do you think?"
Ethan:"That sounds great. We sho..." Ethan's voice faded from Matt's mind, but Matt didn't seem concerned. He got close to the mirror and looked deep into his new eyes.
Matt:"Sorry, Ethan. But I want to enjoy your body now in more privacy. I'm sure you understand." he kissed his reflection and started licking the mirror, making his way to the cum pouring slowly on the mirror surface.
Matt:"Ew, Ethan. That's for not eating enough sugar. I'll fix that for you. But now I got something to fix for you."
Matt took out Ethan's phone and called Betty. "Hey, Betty. Do you mind If I'd come over? I want to know if you're ok. You were so different before. So fearless and READY. I was really weirded out, but actually happy to see that. Really? Huh. That's strange. Well I can go to your house and we can talk about it. Ok, see you in a few minutes."
Matt locked the phone and headed to the bathroom, where he knew that Ethan had condoms ready.
He approached the mirror. Looked back at himself and said:"Congratulations, Ethan. You're not gonna be a virgin anymore. I'll give Betty a great time. Don't worry. Not like you should worry at all, you can't hear me and it's not like I'd give you your body back anytime soon. Haha."
#posession#possessed#body possession#male possession#ghost possession#Friend possession#gay to straight#striaght to gay
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you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.
(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)
but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.
(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)
there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.
(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)
you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.
(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)
you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.
in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.
but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.
they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.
it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.
#spilled ink#warm up#can you tell what i'm mad about today specifically#i will say that there are a LOT of things that go into this. like a lot. this is ungendered and unspecific for a reason#it isn't just sexism. it's also racism. and ableism. and honestly classism.#and before a healthcare professional reads this as a personal attack: i understand ur burnt out#we are ALSO burnt out. your situation is also dire. this is not an attack on you.#this is a commentary on the incredible amounts of bigotry that lie at the heart of capitalism#where people have to pay money out of pocket to be told to fuck off.#your job is important. so is our humanity. and if you cannot accept that people are fucking mad as hell#at the industry - you are probably not listening .#anyway at some point im gonna write a piece about sexism specifically in medical shit#but i don't want terfs clowning in it bc they can't understand nuance#> it is true that ppl w/a uterus are more likely to experience medical malpractice & dismissal globally#> it is also true that trans people experience an equally fucked up and bad time in the medical field#> great news! the medical industrial complex is an equal opportunity life ruiner :)#(if you find it necessary to go into a debate about biology while discussing medical malpractice#i want to warn you that you're misunderstanding the issue. because guess what.#cis MEN might experience this. particularly black men. particularly disabled men.#so YES having a uterus can lead to more trouble for you. but this happens a LOT.#instead of fighting those ALSO experiencing your pain.... try working WITH them.#which btw. is like. actual feminism.)
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of course other women want your boyfriend
pairing: nanami kento x reader
tags: nanami is 34. is that a warning? lol.
"your dad's kinda hot."
the bar isn't too full, just the regular crowd, and then some. of course there were other college kids, none that you knew. well, except this one.
you've seen aiko around, always at the back of the class. not that that's worth shaming, you ended up back there too often due to sleepy mornings to be looking down on her.
no, it's the constant bitching and laughing during class that pissed you the fuck off. not an ounce of respect or decorum for the rest of you depressed losers just trying to make it out of class with notes that made sense, or the poor professor, who has long since given up on admonishing her. so maybe you did once tell her off in the middle of class a week before finals. just once. or twice.
and here she is, having tapped on your shoulder as you were sipping your drink, bitching and laughing with her friends hanging behind her, snickering along.
"that's not my dad," you reply, ticked off.
her eyes widen in faux shock. "even better then! I didn't wanna make it too messy for you. what's his instagram?"
you laugh, bunching up your shoulders, finally putting down your drink and getting up. you're usually not the jealous type, and you're not even feeling jealous right now, more like a bubbling irritation.
"he doesn't have an Instagram. he's thirty four, what instagram do you think you're gonna be hitting him up on, huh?"
"thirty four? he looks forty plus at least! I didn't know being with a stuck up bitch like you would age a man like that, but makes sense!" she scoffs, looking you up and down.
"so you can pick up on social cues! I was wondering how you couldn't figure out that he's my boyfriend from the kiss he gave me or, perhaps from the way he was holding me, but turns out you're just a rude bitch who wants to slather her fingers all over my boyfriend!" you snap at her.
that makes a few people around you look over, and as much as you wanted to smack her across her face, you needed to maintain your standards.
"then where is he now? where's your boyfriend? and which forty year old brings his little girlfriend on a night out to a bar like-"
"there you are, sweetheart."
kento slides his arm around your waist, slipping into the seat next to yours.
nanami kento. thirty four. food critic! 6' 1", honey blonde hair slicked back, but a few pieces spill out on to his face, deep brown eyes that are both soft and sharp. his white shirt's sleeves rolled up to his elbows showing his thick forearms, veiny with light, golden hair. the bar and the girl in front of you almost fade to the back of your mind when his cologne hits your nose, sending you into a daze.
almost.
"ken!" you breathe.
"did i keep you too long? you know satoru, refusing to get to the point," he frowns, dropping a kiss on your forehead. "what's got you all worked up?"
"hey!"
his eyes leave yours to look at aiko. "yes?"
"how come she doesn't bring you around more often? she's always all by herself, in her own little world! so shy, really! i'm aiko, we go to class together!" she smiles at him, all cute and bubbly like.
"what are you trying to do?" you ask, shouldering youself between kento and her. "you trying to swoop in and show him a better life or something? do you need attention that bad?"
"oh my god, you guys, look she's getting all bothered!" she gasps to her friends around her. "no babe i didn't mean it like that, i just meant it like i am personally, SO happy that someone like you's found love, you know? even if it's with someone who is SO different from you, you're finally out of your shell, and clearly, there is someone for everyone!" she gushes, and then looks over your shoulder at kento.
"why are you looking at him, look at me," you interject, something finally snapping in you. kento can sense the change in you, and places his hands on your waist.
"sweetheart, i think- "
you appreciate it, but you can handle this, you're FINE.
"no no," you repeat, "look at me! because do you think he's gonna treat you the way he treats me? do you think he's gonna keep up with your bullshit, and your little friend group and not see you for the pathetic attention seeking loser you are? you think he's gonna buy you the stuff you want and take you to all your raves and whatnot? this man goes to sleep every night by eleven thirty! you don't see him at parties because he's thirty four fucking years old, and his definition of a night out is wine and fine dining, with ME! he treats me like this, and buys me whatever the fuck i want, because i'm me, he's not gonna treat you like that babe!"
"don't get all worked up!" aiko spits "we can just be friends, you know!" she twirls her hair, her eyes still on kento.
"what are you twirling your hair for? he's not even looking at you, the only thing that that's gonna do is make you even balder. spending all your time trying to poach another bitch's man the whole time your bald spot's been making direct eye contact with me."
she gasps, and deep down you know you would never say that to a girl unless she absolutely deserved it, and aiko has been begging for it.
kento squeezes your waist, standing up, towering over you from behind.
"baby, she said she just wanted to be friends, didn't she?" he asks. "why don't you give her my instagram?"
aiko chuckles, seeming to have recovered. she pushes her phone into his hands, instagram open, and he hands it over to you diligently.
you scoff and type in his username, pressing the follow button and shoving it back to her.
"now that that's done," sighs kento, holding you. "it's getting a little hot in here, isn't it honey? let's get this scarf off of you."
his hands unfasten the scarf that you had tied around your neck, that you're sure aiko just attributed to poor fashion sense. despite the previous chaos, your eyes follow his thick fingers as the open the knot, and unloop the scarf from around your neck, causing the scarf to slip out and leave you neck bare in the deep v neck top you had put on this morning.
deep red and purple bruises litter your neck, all the way down to your breasts, disappearing off behind the lace borders of the neck of your top.
kento stares at you, smug and unclouded desire clear on his face. he slides his hands up and holds the sides of your neck firmly, squeezing slightly. he pulls you closer and your lips meet in a deep kiss, his thumbs rubbing slow circles on your cheek. the kiss leaves you breathless as he pulls away and leans back in to place on more kiss on your wet, parted lips, taking you by surprise.
"that's perfect," he thumbs on one of the hickies, eyes never leaving you. "my perfect girl."
warmth floods up your chest and face. a smile can't help but spread across your face as you lean into him.
"let's go, love. dinner, wine and that eleven thirty nap time awaits us," he chuckles, taking your hand, gathering your bag and turning away to leave, not a single glance given to aiko.
aiko!
you turn to her, a lazy, easy grin on your face, glancing to her phone open with kento's instagram, and then back up at her. "happy stalking!"
aiko and her friends are sure to spend the night pouring over kento's instagram, which is filled to the brim with pictures of you, you and him, food, you, travel and his girlfriend, you.
DO NOT REPOST
yay first fic!!!
likes, reblogs, comments HIGHLY appreciated 🩷
#nanami x reader#nanami#nanami kento x reader#kento nanami x reader#nanami fluff#kento nanami fluff#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk drabbles#yves tells you a story ✩🕯₊˚.📖⋆🌙⋆⁺₊✧
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Locked in (Oh Haewon x M!Reader)
Yes Haewon spread that Charisma Uniqueness Nerve and Talent (Smut! .... Sorry!) Word Count: 5,588
"Fuck you Y/N, I'll do whatever I want!"
"Haewon please get off the table. You're getting it dirty with your shoes!"
You were getting tired of Haewon. She always purposely went out of her way to piss you off. This time was no different, yesterday you made a big deal about her spilling her drinks all over the table and not cleaning it. Today she decided to get revenge by making the table dirty with her shoes.
You aren't much of a clean freak but the way Haewon kept being so unhygienic was driving you crazy.
"And what if I don't get off the table Y/N what are you going to do about it?" You aren't much of a confrontational person and Haewon knows it. You try to assert authority but she never felt intimidated by you, which made her more comfortable challenging you.
You sighed as you knew you couldn't do anything to get her off the table. The only thing you could do was wait for her to get bored and get off so you could start cleaning the table.
Suddenly you heard someone enter your dorm and looked behind you to see Kim Dahyun.
"Are you guys arguing again?!" Dahyun asked as if she was a mom who was disappointed that her kids weren't getting along.
"It's Y/N's fault!" Haewon said when she saw that it was Dahyun. Something you noticed about Haewon is that she treats everyone nicely. Well everyone except you for a reason that you don't know.
"Both of you guys need to learn to get along. Why do you guys even argue so much?"
"It's all Y/N's fault!"
"Oh really Haewon? Last time I checked you were the one being such a fucking bitch!"
"Enough both of you!"
Dahyun grabbed both of you by an arm and dragged you both into a room.
"I was gonna take you both out to the friend groups hangout but instead you guys can talk out your differences. By the time I get back you both better have made up." Dahyun left and closed the door.
"Wait!" Haewon yelled, she tried to open the door but it was locked. "Dahyun quit playing don't leave me in here trapped with this loser." Haewon started banging on the door but it was useless Dahyun already left.
"Ugh! I hate you Y/N."
"Me? This is your fault Haewon!"
"Shut the fuck up Y/N!"
Haewon went up to you and punched you in the face. It hurt you, it didn't even feel like she put much power into that punch yet it still felt painful.
Both you and Haewon started fighting each other. Leaving bruises on each other and tiring yourselves out at a result. Eventually you both got tired and laid on the bed.
"Fuck you Y/N lay on the floor."
"Why don't you do it Haewon?"
"Because it's gross, now get off the bed!"
"Make me."
Haewon sighed, she didn't have the energy to push you off. You both laid there on the bed for an hour not talking to each other. Neither of you had anything to entertain yourselves with and it was driving you both crazy.
You eventually turned over to Haewon
"Hey can we talk."
Haewon turned over and you guys made eye contact for the first time since you guys laid down on the bed.
"Well not like I have anything else to do."
"Why do you always bully me?"
"Y/N ... I just like seeing your reaction. Seeing you upset is something that-"
While Haewon was talking you started to pay more attention to her body. You never realized how ... good she looked. I mean she was totally your type. How come you never noticed?
You couldn't stop yourself from looking at her lips. They looked so delicious you just knew those soft lips would feel amazing.
"Hey! Hey! Y/N!'
You suddenly came out of your thoughts and realized you've been staring at her for too long.
"Do my lips look that good to you Y/N?"
You blushed and nodded your head. I mean she already caught you no point in lying to her at this point.
Haewon smiled and started scanning your body.
"You know Y/N you're not too bad yourself."
"Really Haewon?"
Haewon pulled you into a hug, hugging you tightly as if you would disappear if she let go.
You hugged her back taking her sweet smell in.
"Y/N I'm sorry for everything. I hope you can forgive me."
You brushed her hair and kissed her on the cheek which made her gasp. She didn't expect you to take such a sudden move on her.
"Haewon I love you. I could never stay mad at you."
"I love you to Y/N"
You both hugged each other tightly and drifted off to sleep.
Suddenly you and Haewon were woken up by the sound of the door opening. Dahyun entered the room.
"When I told you guys to make up I didn't expect this. So are you guys dating now?"
"Wh-were not dating!" Haewon quickly responded in defense.
"Yeah sure, I've never seen you as happy as you were just now Haewon. You were hugging Y/N as if your life depended on it."
Haewon sighed "Fine you caught us, we're dating now."
You were shocked when Haewon said that. You realized you two were now official, and honestly you couldn't be happier.
Haewon reached out for your hand to help you get up. You were still a bit hazy from just waking up but you managed to grab Haewon's hand, and she helped you sit up on the bed.
Dahyun squealed "I'm so happy for you guys!"
You clung to Haewon's arm as if she was going to leave you. You were in love with her. The same girl that one day ago you wanted nothing to do with was the same girl that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with.
"So when's the first date?"
"Aren't you rushing things Dahyun? Besides little Y/N here is still sleepy, he probably wants to catch up on his sleep."
"Haewon you're only 1 month older than me!" you responded in a groggy voice.
Dahyun giggled "Alright well I'll leave you two love birds to it. Don't do anything dangerous without the proper protection."
Dahyun left you both in the room alone. You laid your head on Haewon's shoulder.
"Haewon can we go back to sleep."
Haewon looked at you and gave you a warm smile.
"Of course we can."
1 week later
You and Haewon were going out on a first date. As you held her hand you couldn't stop yourself from feeling happy. Your heart kept beating fast and it felt like the only thing in the world that mattered was you two.
You and Haewon arrived at the ice cream shop and went inside. There were a handful of people inside but not too many people that it felt cramped. You both went up to the counter and ordered your favorite ice cream flavors.
You both decided to eat outside. You felt the wind blowing on your skin as you ate. It was relaxing, you felt at ease with Haewon at your side. Back then even being in the same room with Haewon would put you on edge but now she was a source of comfort for you.
"Y/N you have something on your face."
Haewon acted like she was wiping something off your face but she really just wanted an excuse to rub your cheeks.
"Did you just make that up?"
Haewon giggled "You caught me Y/N."
Ever since the day Dahyun locked you both into a room you've both been inseparable. You've both been sleeping, showering, and hanging out together. Every morning you felt blessed being able to see Haewon's face first thing in the morning.
When you finished your ice cream you clung to Haewon again.
"Y/N you're so clingy!" Haewon said when she felt you cling onto her.
I mean ... you were, but could anyone blame you? I mean when someone like Oh Haewon is your girlfriend you just have to show her love every moment you get.
"Hey Y/N can I ask you something?"
"Anything Haewon."
"Okay ... just know I don't want to force you into anything if you don't want to do what I'm about to say then that's completely fine and I respect your decision."
That night you locked the door to your room and looked at Haewon a little nervous.
"Y/N are you okay?"
"It's just ... I don't feel good about myself. I don't want you to see me naked."
Haewon hugged you and kissed your cheek.
"Y/N I love you the way you are. But if you don't want to go through with this then that's okay."
Hearing Haewon say those words gave you confidence and you decided to go through with it.
"Can you strip first Haewon?"
Haewon nodded and began to take her clothes off. You were mesmerized, you couldn't believe that she had such a perfect body. But it only made you that much more insecure knowing it was your turn next.
Haewon went up to you and grabbed the hem of your shirt.
"Do you want me to take it off for you?"
"No! Please let me take my time Haewon."
Haewon understood. She backed away and watched you as you slowly mustered up the courage to start taking your clothes off.
When you finally took all your clothes off you felt horrible. What business did you have trying to have sex with Haewon? You should have stayed in your clothes. What were you thinking by taking off your clothes? You should just put your clothes back on and try to-
"Y/N your perfect."
You got pulled out of your thoughts when you heard those words come out of her mouth. You felt relieved and happy when Haewon called you perfect. You started blushing and feeling giddy.
"Oh ~ Y/N you like it when I praise you?"
You were a little bit surprised when Haewon said that. You never thought that you had a praising kink but when you thought about it you always felt butterflies when Haewon praised you.
"Well I guess I do." You responded.
Haewon went up and softly kissed your lips. They felt like heaven, you kissed her soft lips back wanting to be able to kiss her forever.
Haewon started mumbling while kissing you "Y/N you're doing so well." It turned you on. Your cock started rising slowly.
You started to deepen the kiss. You both were caught in the moment and you both started to kiss each other more rough. You slid your tongue in her mouth and your tongues started fighting for control.
Neither of you won as both your tongues got tired and you both eventually pulled away.
"Y/N you did great." You felt yourself getting flustered and your cock was getting hard when you heard Haewon say those words.
Haewon looked at your cock and smiled. "Do you want me to take care of you?" You nodded and she got down on her knees.
Haewon was on her knees for a few moments before she spoke up. "Y/N I'm new to this. Is there anything in specific I should be doing?"
You had to ponder for a moment. This was your first time having sex to so you weren't sure if there was something she should be doing or if she should just do what she thinks is right.
"How about you try just touching it?"
Haewon nodded and started to poke your cock. She wasn't sure if there was a specific way she should touch your cock so she just went with what she thought was a safe option by poking it.
"Ngh~"
"Y/N are you okay? Am I doing it wrong?"
"No Haewon your doing just fine."
Haewon started to rub your cock with one finger to see if she could get a reaction out of you. She saw that you slightly reacted but it wasn't anything significant.
"Y/N is there something else I should be doing?"
"Try licking it."
Haewon got her tongue out and started to wonder where she should lick your cock. Should she start with the head? Or maybe the base of your cock. Or would somewhere in the middle be better?
Haewon decided to start in the middle just in case. When you felt her tongue you jerked. Her tongue on your sensitive areas felt great and you felt your legs going weak from it.
You grabbed onto Haewon's head grasping it desperately so you wouldn't fall. Haewon started licking your cock at different speeds. She didn't know which speed was optimal so she did all of them. Randomly going from a slow speed to a slightly faster speed only to drastically increase her pace the next second.
Even with all of the stimulation you felt you didn't feel any closer to release. "H-Haewon I hate to bother you but I'm not any closer to cumming."
Haewon felt horrible when you said that. Was she really that bad? She was regretting asking to have sex she shouldn't have ever tried. She got up and sat next to you.
"I'm sorry Y/N I really wanted this night to mean something special to us." You could tell Haewon wanted to cry for messing up an important moment in your relationship.
"Haewon don't cry." You embraced her patting her back. "Let's try again Haewon"
"But Y/N the moment is ruined now."
"As long as it's with you every moment is precious to me."
That made Haewon feel better. She got back up but this time she was going to do what she thought was right.
"Y/N lay down."
You followed her instructions without hesitation. Haewon got on top of you and started to align her pussy to your cock.
"Are you going to be okay?"
"Let's hope so." Haewon said as she quickly took your whole cock in her pussy. She knew it was gonna hurt so she decided to just try to take the whole thing in one go.
"Ow fuck- It hurts."
"Haewon you should get off. I don't want you to be hurt."
"Trust me Y/N I can handle it."
After some heavy breathing she managed to calm herself down and started to bounce on your cock. Her pussy gripped your cock so good you thought the blood flow to your cock stopped.
You both were sweating. It was the first time for both of you so it felt like an extremely intense activity.
"Y/N I feel like something is building up in me."
"It's fine Haewon just relax yourself and let it happen."
Haewon proceeded to cum all over your dick. So much came out that some got on the bed sheets.
She was exhausted. After having an intense orgasm she was ready to hit the hay but she still wanted you to experience pleasure.
"Y/N sit up and let me try to suck your dick again."
"Haewon that's the least of my worries. My time can come another time right now let's just get some rest."
She nodded and fell asleep on top of you.
A few years later
You and Haewon had just finished moving all of your stuff into your new house. After college you and Haewon decided to live together and move into a home together. The rest of your friend group lived separately but you all didn't live far from each other so you guys would see each other every now and then.
"Let's start unpacking Y/N."
You started to help Haewon unpack and as you went through all your things you couldn't help but to think about the past. Honestly so many things fell in place for you and Haewon to even be together. You had to had picked the same college, you guys were randomly assigned roommates, and it just so happened you shared a friend that decided to lock you both in a room. You were grateful for Dahyun as if she had never locked you in that room with Haewon. Well who knows how your life would've turned out.
"Reminiscing about the past Y/N?"
"Yeah I was just thinking about us and how we even came to be you know?"
"I remember, I remember when we first did it. We were so inexperienced."
"Don't remind me Haewon! I prefer to think that night never happened."
You and Haewon started to talk about the past and talk about old memories. Suddenly you heard the doorbell ring.
You got up and went to open the door. When you opened the door and saw one of your friends from your friend group Lily Morrow.
"Y/N it's so nice to see you!"
"It's nice to see you to Lily."
"Where's Haewon?"
"She's unpacking in the living room."
"Want to help me scare her?"
You walked back into the room and went back to help Haewon with the unpacking.
"Who was at the door Y/N?"
"It was just a sales person."
"Ugh I hate sales people. Like why are they bothering us on our own property."
While Haewon was complaining Lily suddenly came up behind her.
"Surprise!"
"Yah!"
"L-Lily! Don't scare me like that!"
"Sorry Haewon I couldn't resist."
"Did you plan this with her Y/N?"
"Perhaps."
"You're gonna pay for that."
You knew exactly what Haewon meant.
"Anyways Lily why did you even come over."
"I was in the area and wanted to pay you guys a visit. Well since I'm here I might as well help you guys unpack."
After a few hours you all managed to unpacked all of your things and put them in there place. Lily was about to leave but suddenly it started raining.
"Just my luck. It rains just when I'm about to leave."
"You can stay with us Lily for the night." You offered.
"Really? I don't want to bother you two."
"It's fine you can have the bedroom here on the first floor."
"Thank you."
Lily got up and left for the bedroom. Once Haewon heard the sound of the door close she looked at you and gave you a smirk you were all too familiar with.
"Haewon please don't."
She started to rub your clothed cock and you tried your best to keep your moans in.
"I don't know Y/N. I think you should learn your place."
You gulped knowing what was going to happen next.
"Follow me."
You obeyed Haewon and followed her to the bedroom on the second floor. On the way Haewon grabbed an unopened box. Once you two entered the room Haewon locked the door.
Haewon started to open the box. You gulped wondering what she would pull out. She pulled out handcuffs.
"H-Haewon?"
It was no use she was already lost. Haewon put your hands behind your back and put them in the handcuffs. You didn't resist and let Haewon do what she wanted.
Haewon kissed your lips for a few moments before pulling away.
"Safe word?"
"Lock"
Haewon smiled and went back to the box. She pulled out a whip and went back to you.
"You'll listen to me from now on."
"Yes Haewon." It would only make it worse if you resisted so it was easier for both of you if you just listened to her.
"Now don't move or else I'm going to punish you." Haewon proceeded to pull down your pants and saw your hard cock.
"Horney already Y/N?" You nodded. You couldn't lie you enjoyed seeing Haewon take charge like this.
Haewon started to slowly take your cock. Her tongue glided through your whole length. Swirling your tip and gently sucking. Your legs were shaking you. Wanted to thrust in her mouth but knew better.
You started moaning but you quickly shut your mouth and tried to suppress them. When you did this Haewon used the whip to hit you.
"Did I tell you to suppress your moans?"
"But Lily-"
Haewon whipped you again "I don't give a fuck that she's downstairs. You listen to me got it? Now you let me hear your moans Y/N."
You nodded and Haewon went back to taking care of your cock. You moaned loudly knowing full well that there was a good chance Lily could hear you.
"Mhm~ Yes Y/N let Lily know that you're submissive for me."
Haewon went back to whipping you. It hurt you horribly but something about it turned you on. Haewon started to tighten the handcuffs on your hands to add to your pain.
"Fuck"
There was too much to focus on. The pain you felt was horrible but at the same time Haewon gave you the best pleasure you had ever felt. Your cock started twitching in her mouth and she pulled out.
"Who knows Y/N maybe I'll leave you like this as punishment for earlier."
"Please~"
Haewon pushed you onto the bed and got on top of you. She started to strip her clothes and you couldn't help but stare.
"You're really excited to see me naked huh?"
You blushed and nodded.
Haewon smirked and deliberately started going slower.
"Please don't tease me Haewon."
Haewon smacked your face.
"Since when do you order me around?"
"I don't.."
"Don't speak up unless I say so."
Haewon went back to undressing and after what felt like hours she finally took off all her clothes off.
Haewon sat on top of you and you started to struggle to breathe.
"If you want to be able to breathe properly eat me out."
You started eating Haewon out as fast as possible. You slurped down every bit of juice from her pussy and ran your tongue all over it. Haewon was lost in her own world. Her legs were shaking and she held onto your head for support.
As you felt yourself suffocating Haewon squirted all over you and got off you. You gasped for air and tried to regain composure.
Haewon however didn't have any interest in letting you rest.
"Get up Y/N and let me get those handcuffs off you."
With low energy you sat yourself up and Haewon grabbed the key and freed you from the handcuffs. She also took this chance to take off your shirt.
Haewon got up and went back to the box and reached for something else. She ended up pulling out a blindfold and some ropes.
You gulped. It was far from your favorite activity but you wanted to make Haewon happy.
Haewon tied up your arms and legs. She put the blindfold on you before she got on your dick and started riding you.
She whipped you repeatedly. It stung you horribly but for the sake of Haewon's pleasure you didn't want to use your safe word.
"Fuck Y/N I'm gonna cum!"
Haewon was sadistic which you were fine with but you felt the pain becoming more unbearable overriding your enjoyment. You tried holding out until Haewon came.
But you reached your breaking point. Your body was bruised badly. If Haewon whipped you one more time you felt like you would break.
"Lock! Lock! Haewon please stop!" You yelled in pain unable to take much more of Haewon's sadistic tendencies.
Haewon was snapped out of her trance and quickly got off you. She untied the ropes and took off your blindfold.
"Y/N are you okay?! I'm sorry I got ahead of myself." Haewon was sad when she saw a few tears on you.
"I-I'm fine Haewon."
"No you're not! Come on Y/N let me fix you a hot bath."
Haewon helped you get into the bathroom into the bathtub. She started the warm water to help you relax.
"Thank you Haewon."
"Don't mention it Y/N. I should be sorry to you. I got carried away."
Haewon got in the bath with you and embraced you lovingly. She kissed you in the spot where she smacked you earlier.
"I love you Y/N please don't ever hold off from using your safe word."
"I promise I won't next time Haewon."
You both sat in silence until Haewon remembered something.
"Y/N you did great back there."
To say you were a bit surprised would be an understatement. But it also warmed your heart that Haewon still remembered when you told her you had a bit of a praising kink all those years ago.
"Y/N you are perfect I love you so much."
You felt yourself getting worked up from Haewon's compliments and started to feel your cock rising.
"Want me to make you cum?"
You nodded
Haewon and you got out of the bath. She got to her knees and started to give your cock all the attention she could. You started thrusting in and out of her mouth. Her tight throat felt amazing and you felt closer to release.
You increased your thrusts and Haewon started to deep throat your cock. You ended up spreading your cum all over Haewon's mouth and she swallowed every last drop.
"Your cum is amazing thank you Y/N."
You both dried yourselves before going to sleep together naked.
The next day you were both woken up by Lily's yelling downstairs.
"Haewon Y/N! I made pancakes!"
You both got dressed and went downstairs. You saw the pancakes Lily made and went to eat them.
"Thank you so much Lily. You shouldn't have." You said before eating her pancakes.
"Well it's the least I could do for you guys. Besides I'm sure you guys need the energy after last night."
You and Haewon blushed.
"You heard us?" Haewon said surprised
Lily chuckled "Of course I did. My room was directly under yours. I didn't know you were sadistic like that Haewon."
Haewon couldn't make eye contact with Lily and ate her pancakes with her head down.
One year later
You were nervous.
Today was the day you would propose to Haewon. You ran the scenario multiple times throughout your head.
Step 1: Go to the outdoor venue you rented out for the day and set up the place with Lily.
Step 2: Dahyun picks up Haewon to take her to a "Fancy restaurant"
Step 3: Dahyun tells Haewon that she needs to "Pick up her friend" as an excuse so she can head to the venue.
Step 4: If everything goes well you and Lily should be done by the time Haewon and Dahyun get their and you propose to Haewon.
It should be simple enough.
When you arrive at the venue you notice Lily is not there. Panicking you call her.
"Where are you?!"
"My car broke down!"
You started panicking. Lily was in charge of bringing all the decorations. The venue only had some basic decorations but you wanted to go all out as this would be an important moment in your life. Should you try to pick Lily up? No she lives too far away, you probably won't make it back in time.
Should you tell Dahyun to try to stall for more time? But Haewon would be suspicious if after Dahyun gets a call she suddenly starts stalling.
You checked the time and saw you only had 20 minutes before Dahyun and Haewon would get to the venue.
You were about to have a break down. How could everything go bad on such an important day?
15 minutes passed. Only five more minutes until Haewon and Dahyun arrived. You were contemplating whether you should try to propose another day or if you should just try to make do with what you already have.
Suddenly you heard people scream your name.
"Y/N!!!!"
Looking in the direction of where the sounds were coming from you saw Lily and Bae running towards you.
"Lily and Bae? What are you guys doing here?"
Lily was out of breath "I called Bae to pick me up. We were speeding our way here. And then we ran the rest of the way since the closest parking lot was far."
Bae suddenly interrupted Lily "Guys we're running out of time we need to decorate now!"
All of you started setting up the venue. You had to cut some corners as you didn't have time on your side anymore.
You got a text from Dahyun telling you that she arrived. Lily and Bae quickly went to hide and you tried to get yourself ready as you went to hide.
"Dahyun why is your friend here anyways."
"They had to help out someone set up for an event."
"I don't see them."
"Hold on I need to use the restroom Haewon. Try looking around for them."
Once Dahyun left the area you came out from hiding.
"Y/N? What are you doing here?"
"Haewon I need to tell you something."
"What do you need to tell me?"
"I-I don't think our relationship will work out if we stay like this."
Haewon was shocked. She grabbed your hands while looking as if she was about to cry.
"What do you mean Y/N."
"Ever since we graduated from college I truly loved you. I love everything we've done together and honestly I've made memories I will never forget with you. But we can't keep going ... at least not like this."
Tears fell down Haewon's eyes. She was crushed fearing your next words.
"Y/N please don't leave me! I promise I can fix everything just name it."
"Haewon I can't let you be my girlfriend ... I want you to be my wife."
You got down on your knees pulling out the ring you bought.
"Will you be mine Haewon?"
Haewon looked at you. You couldn't make out her facial expressions. You held your breath waiting for her answer.
"Y/N fuck you! Don't ever scare me like that again! Of course I'll be your wife Y/N."
Haewon took the ring and put it on. You breathed a huge sigh of relief and pulled her into a hug. Lily, Bae, and Dahyun came up to you guys and congratulated you.
"Come on Haewon let's go eat." You said while holding your fiance's hand.
Wedding Day
You were waiting for Haewon to walk down the aisle. You were ready to spend the rest of your life with Haewon. Sharing all of your worst and best moments and being there for each other even in illness you were ready to tackle anything as long as you had Haewon by your side.
And then you saw her. She was perfect, you couldn't take your eyes off Haewon. It was as if time slowed down.
Everything was going perfectly. You two exchanged vows and then the magic words were said.
"You may now kiss the bride."
You pulled Haewon in for a deep kiss. The only thing that mattered in that moment was you and her.
"Y/N I'm ready to spend the rest of my life with you."
"Me to Haewon."
That night you partied hard. Hanging out with the people who meant the most to you.
Haewon threw the bouquet and Bae ended up being the one to catch it. Everyone cheered for her and you jokingly asked her.
"Are you finally going to ask out Sullyoon?"
Bae blushed and lightly pushed you.
"Yah not so loud Y/N."
Eventually the party came to a close and everyone went home. When you got home with Haewon you carried her to bed.
You laid her down gently and kissed her forehead. Haewon was getting sleepy so you started to change her into her pajamas. Once you got Haewon changed you started to take off your clothes so you could change but suddenly you heard Haewon get up.
"How about I give you a special present Y/N as a celebration to us?"
Knowing where this was going you nodded your head and took off your remaining clothes. Haewon got on her knees and started to pump your cock.
"Haewon this is the best thing I could ask for."
She simply smiled and started to suck your tip. Haewon swirled her tongue on your tip covering it in her saliva.
Haewon bobbed her head. Her tongue sliding through your cock letting every inch feel it. Your cock started twitching and you were close to release.
You started to thrust in her mouth. You spread your cum in her mouth. So much cum came out it was leaking out of her mouth.
Haewon's face was stained with cum. And both of you wouldn't have it any other way.
"Now it's my turn to give you a special gift Haewon."
You picked up Haewon and laid her on the bed. You took of her pajamas and started to lick her pussy and rub her clit.
Haewon moaned loving the feeling you gave her. You licked her pussy and enjoyed how her fluids tasted. You truly never could have enough. You ate Haewon out.
Shoving your tongue deep into her pussy Haewon screamed and squirted all over you. You drank every last drop.
You both laid naked next to each other in bed and shared another kiss.
"I love you Haewon."
"I love you to Y/N"
You both drifted to sleep holding each other, ready to spend the rest of your lives together.
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Finally finished this for all the people requesting longer smuts.
I wanted to make this longer but I felt like people would loose interest if I made it too long.
Anyways if you actually sat through all of this thank you.
#kpop#kpop smut#kpop girls#kpop gg#haewon#haewon nmixx#nmixx#nmixx smut#bae jinsol#sullyoon#lily nmixx#dahyun#smut
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Omg hi!!!🧚🏻♀️
I just wanted to pop by and tell you how much I LOVE your writing and content, makes me kick my feet reading about Benny and Bunny😫🙂↔️I was just wondering if mayhaps you’d write something in which Bunny gets mad at Benny for something and gives him the cold shoulder hehe. You mentioned in your most recent installment of them how she’s done that when pissed at him and I just thought it’d be so interesting to see an upset Bunny and groveling Benny😏perhaps involving the topic of jealousy or miscommunication. Have a good day/evening and feel free to ignore my yapping!!!🙈🐇
Thank you so much for your kind words! 🥹You're so sweet!!! I could never ignore your yapping, friend! Sorry this took so long to post but I wanted to get it right since this request is so stinking cute! I was going to break this up into two parts because I got a little carried away but I figured you guys probably don't mind the longer posts ;) Please let me know your thoughts on this as I love reading your comments! Hope you enjoy! 🫶
Benny x Bunny Masterlist 🐰
Word Count- 3.4k+
Love, Lids, and Lessons (Benny Cross X Shy!Reader)
Listen, Benny fucked up on a near daily basis. He’s by no means perfect and there was a lot that you overlook because you loved him and he’s still the best man you’d ever met. However, there were times where Benny pissed you off so bad that you simply couldn't excuse him. This happened to be one of those times.
You were standing beside him at the pool table during what happened to be a pretty intense moment of a game that Benny happened to be losing pretty badly. It was the third time you’d approached him, asking to leave. It wasn’t even that late but you had wanted to go because you planned to get up early the next morning to meet your girlfriends for a breakfast date. He’d told you that the two of you could leave soon, after he finished his beer. And then he told you after he finished his game. Then that game became the next game. And the current game which he happened to be losing and maybe it was that his temper with the razzing he was receiving from the members who watched the game but he just didn’t want to have to tell you one more time that you would both be leaving soon. You tugged on his sleeve again and he just said it, without a filter, without thinking.
“Bunny, you’re being naggy.”
That was it. Just four words that would cause him more trouble than he even realized. He didn’t mean it in a rude way; He was just trying to tell you what you were doing was annoying to him. He said way worse than that to the boys and they never reacted the way you did.
Your mouth dropped open in shock, driven speechless by his words. He made a shrugging motion to you that said What? But the low whistled that emitted from Cal on the other side of the pool table did nothing to deescalate the embarrassment he could see bubbling in your face. You snapped your mouth shut, brows pinching together as you glanced at the others who heard. Not many, just Cal, Johnny, Betty and a few others. It was enough. When your gaze found him again there was an undeniable dark cloud in your eyes and he wanted to apologize. But you turned and walked away before he could say anything else.
“Oh, Benny. . .” Johnny muttered with a grimace but Benny was too caught up in the taunting of the other members around the table to hear him. So he let you storm off, figuring you’d have cooled down by the time his game was over. And shortly after, his game ended (He lost, though he didn’t really find himself caring about that, not with the image of your hurt expression looping in his mind) and he said goodbye to the boys and went to find you. Only . . . you were gone.
He found Gail who told him you had left with Kathy. He clenched his jaw and nodded. You rarely ever left with someone else, you liked to ride home with Benny. He thought maybe you were just tired and Kathy was probably leaving at the same time but a little voice in the back of his head told him it was more to it than that. He tried to ignore the way the ride home was quiet without you on the back. And when he walked through the door, you were not in the entryway where you normally stood waiting for him. No, you weren’t even in the kitchen where he’d sometimes find you during a midnight craving. Something uncomfortable gripped at his heart and he stood in the kitchen for a long time, trying to come to terms with the fact that you probably left.
Trudging up the stairs to your bedroom, his heart skipped a beat when he saw your form laying in the bed, back facing him. He resisted the urge to go to you, sensing the way your shoulders stiffened that you were still awake. He undressed slowly, taking the time to decide what he wanted to say to you. But even as he pulled back the covers and crawled in next to you, no words ever formed in his mouth. Instead, he tried a different tactic. He pressed himself up against your body, sliding his hand over your waist, traveling it up to your breast as he leaned in to kiss your cheek.
You brushed his hand away. “I’m not in the mood, Benny.”
His hand moved down to your hips instead to take it in another direction but you gripped his wrist and moved it back to his side. “I’m serious. I’m tired”
Okay, you were upset about what he’d said. He sighed and rolled onto his back, moving back to his side of the bed. He waited a few more seconds to see if you’d follow him like you normally did, but you remained steadfast in your spot so he reached over to the bedside lamp and switched it off, the room filling with darkness. He laid in that darkness for a long time, contemplating what to say, what to do.
When Benny woke the next morning and his hand drifted over to you, he found your side of the bed empty. He frowned, glancing at the clock. It was still early and you almost never woke up before he did. And if you did, you just wanted to snuggle with him in bed. With an odd feeling in the pit of his gut, he got up and dressed, seeking you out. He found you in the kitchen, wearing an apron with little flowers embroidered on the fabric. You stood at the island, frosting cupcakes that he didn’t know you planned on taking with you.
“Mornin’,” he said as he approached, making his way over to make a cup of coffee. You only hummed in response. He turned back around to face you, leaning against the opposite countertop, feeling as though the space between you was as wide as an ocean. He watched you for a moment as you set down the cupcake you were working on, the delicate desert now freshly adorned with baby pink frosting. You reached forward to start on the next one and that’s when he spoke again. “You need help with that?”
“No,” you replied, avoiding eye-contact. A heavy silence filled the kitchen as he sipped meekly at his coffee and you finished frosting the cupcakes. It’d be better to just rip off the band-aid, he decided. He wasn’t going to go his whole day pretending he didn’t know that you were giving him your traditional cold-shoulder response. So he said, “You still mad about last night?”
Your eyes flashed up to his for just a moment. “What do you think, Benny?”
“About what I said? C’mon . . .” He didn’t even mean it in a rude way! Sometimes you were so sensitive and he truly didn’t understand you. Johnny had told him once that women were a completely different creature than them. And as Benny watched you furiously frost your cupcakes, he really felt the impact of that statement. “I didn’t mean it. You know that. I was a little drunk and–”
“Oh you were drunk?” Your voice dripped with sarcasm. “Well, in that case, I’ll just let you get away with whatever you want when you’re drunk. Won’t let anything affect me at all!”
Hmm. He didn’t think that’s what you were gonna say to that. Benny hated it when you verbally put him in a corner like this, didn’t let him get away with his half-assed apologies that never actually use the phrase ‘I’m sorry.’ It always made him get defensive, made his temper flare and he’d end up doing more damage than good nearly every time.
“You were naggin’ and you know it. I don’t know if it was because you wanted to go home or if you were jealous that someone else had my attention for a moment and you didn’t–”
“Jealous?” The word echoed off the cupboards. “Are you kidding me?”
“Bunny–” he groaned but you cut him off.
“Don’t Bunny me right now,” you griped, eyes narrowing as you began placing the cupcakes in the portable carrier he had surprised you with for your birthday a few months ago. “Jealous? You honestly think I was jealous? Or are you just sayin’ that because you want to get a rise out of me?”
“Well, I’m just tryin to say–” he stopped short as he caught your sharp gaze. “I just. . . Don’t you think you’re overreacting about this?”
Your mouth formed a thin line, jaw clenching. You stared at him for a few agonizingly long moments before you shook your head, muttering, “You–”
Benny was dying to know what you were about to say but only observed as you removed your apron, folded it neatly and placed it back in the drawer before you grabbed your portable tray and left the kitchen. Like a moth to flame, he followed you as you went to the door, pausing only to slide your feet into the kitten heels you had lined up at the baseboard. Without saying another word, you opened the door and left. But he trailed after you, standing on the porch, he wordlessly watched as you descended the stairs and walked down the stone pathway to the white picket fencing you had always talked about and opened the little gate.
“Damn thing,” you grumbled under your breath as you fought with the broken hinge of the gate to close it properly behind you, the sound squeaking obnoxiously.
“When are you comin’ back?” he hollered after you, trying not to sound as desperate as he felt.
“Later.” Was your vague answer before you got into your car and left Benny still standing on the porch, front door ajar and eyes narrowed.
******
Wiping the sweat from his brow, Benny stood to his full height and took a step back to take in the shiny new hinge on the gate he just installed. He tried opening and closing it a few times, admiring the way it worked soundlessly. Good as new, he thought. Fixing physical things like door hinges and motorcycle parts, those were easy. Benny was good with his hands, he could tinker around and fix just about anything he set his mind to. But fixing emotional things. . . those were not so easy for Benny. Apologies were rare and he’s never one to throw them out like confetti as you so often did. You apologized too much and he’s told you that you shouldn’t apologize for half the things you do.
He’d had a lot of time to think about what happened and his mood certainly shifted more than once during his front gate project. At first, mild annoyance because what he said to you was hardly an insult. Then, it might have been due to the sun beating down on him while he worked, but genuine anger replaced the annoyance because you were so damn sensitive and there were times he felt he had to walk on eggshells around you. But the anger quickly fizzled out when he thought about how your sensitivity was what made you special. It was what helped you be so empathetic, so caring toward everyone you came across. And by the time he’d finished fixing the gate, the only feeling that smothered him was a painfully present regret. Regret for what he had said, but also for what he hadn’t. An apology was something you deserved, but he didn’t give it to you, not in an appropriate way.
So when you came home, hours later, he watched from the living room window as your car pulled in front of the house. You exited the car, and he almost held his breath as you opened the gate, taking a moment to open and close it a few times. You definitely noticed he’d fixed it. Good, but that didn’t mean he was in the clear yet.
You came inside and it was clear that you were still upset by the way you moved. He could see your shoulder stiffen when you noticed him there, could see the pouty lip of yours pull into a slight frown. You hardly spoke to each other the rest of the day. You didn’t mention the gate and he didn’t bring it up.
******
The next morning Benny was up before you, as usual. At least that was back to normal. He went downstairs and started a pot of coffee as he got ready for work. He grabbed his lunchbox, preparing to make himself a lunch for work when he stopped short, noticing that there was already a lunch packed in there, complete with one of your pink-frosted cupcakes. His heart squeezed at the realization that you still packed him a lunch, something you did every workday for him, even though you were upset with him. You . . . the sweet creature that he still didn’t completely understand. And he needed to do something.
Fortunately Benny had another trick up his sleeve, and playing dirty didn’t matter to him when it came to getting your attention again.
******
You didn’t sleep well last night, laying awake all night with a heartsick frown, wishing nothing more than for the man who lay just within an arm's reach from you to actually comfort you – in a way that you wanted to be comforted. And tears threatened to spill when you realized, even just for a moment, you wished he could be someone who was a bit more empathetic, a bit more compatible to you. This wasn’t the worst thing he’s said and you’ve had your fights over much worse, but in all your time together, this was the first time you’d ever had that thought. Maybe it was because this was the first time you had both ignored it, both choosing to go to bed angry and upset rather than to work through it. The storm in your heart still surged on, albeit a bit more due to sadness rather than anger, as you slipped on your babydoll pink robe over your nightgown. You tried not to think about Benny at all as you put your hair up in rollers and applied your makeup for the day. You couldn’t hide in the bedroom all day unfortunately, so you traipsed downstairs, bare feet padding softly against each step until you entered the kitchen where you found Benny sitting at one of the island chairs, the daily paper spread out on the countertop before him.
He looked up when he heard you. “Mornin’.”
“Morning,” you parroted as you went to the pantry to grab out your ingredients to start breakfast. You started your tea, grabbing the jar of honey off the shelf and a flower mug. You turned your back to Benny and started to twist the lid off the honey jar . . . only it was really stuck on there. Readjusting your hands, you gave it another go, but still it didn’t budge. Setting your jaw in place, you glanced over your shoulder at your husband who was still looking down at his newspaper. Normally, you would immediately hand something over to Benny to open for you, but you were still mad at him which meant you’ll have to go without honey in your tea.
So instead you started making your bagel for breakfast, a go-to breakfast meal for workday mornings. Popping the bagel in the toaster, you took the homemade strawberry jam out of the fridge and frowned when you realized that lid was also screwed on extra tight too. You turned to face your partner, reluctantly asking, “Can you open this?”
He looked up at you, eyes glancing down at the jam jar and he held out his hand. “I’ll open it for you if you talk to me.”
In no mood to play his games, you rolled your eyes. “Forget it. I can do it myself.”
You turned back around, feeling his gaze burning into you as you grabbed a dish rag and placed it over the lid to get a better grip. You twisted hard, tongue darting out between your teeth as you concentrated on opening it. It seemed as though a mutant with superhuman strength had sealed this lid last – which was strange considering you were the only person in the house who ever used it. You peaked back at Benny who watched you blatantly so you stuck your chin out defiantly as you put the jar back down on the countertop. Fine, you’d just put peanut butter on your bagel instead. You scooped up the peanut butter jar, this time facing him as you twisted the lid and you nearly screamed in frustration when you felt how tightly this lid was as well.
Wordlessly, he held out his hand across the countertop, waiting patiently as you crossed your arms, mentally debating if you could go without any of these items on your bagel.
Ding! You both glanced over as your perfectly-browned bagel popped up from the toaster. You sighed through your nose, biting your bottom lip as defeat settled in. You grabbed the jam, honey and peanut butter jars and slid them on the countertop before him.
“Okay, fine,” you admittedly softly and watched as he made it look so effortless as he opened the lid with a satisfying pop. You muttered a quick thanks and reached for the jar but he leaned backwards, holding the jar just out of your reach.
“I shouldn’t have said that,” he spoke, eyes earnestly searching your face. “What I said at the bar – about you askin’ to go home. You weren’t being naggy, I should have listened to you the first time. That was my own fault. I was just getting so caught up in that stupid game and it wasn’t even important. Not like you are. And what I said embarrassed you and that was wrong.” He rose from his seat, moving around the counter to stand before you as he said, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I hurt you.”
Your eyes widened slightly at his apology. Only a handful of times have you heard those words leave his mouth and you knew he never said them if he wasn’t completely meaningful. You nodded but then remembered his use of vocabulary last night. “And what you said about me bein’ jealous?”
His shoulders slumped ever so slightly. “I’m not apologizin’ for that because you really do confuse me sometimes, Bunny. I thought maybe you were jealous and when you stop communication’ with me, I feel even more lost than usual.”
“Okay, that’s fair,” you accepted as you crossed your arms. “But I don’t want to talk to you when I’m upset. Maybe I want you to do the talking for once.”
He furrowed his brow in thought as he looked over at the toaster. “Well, why don’t we make a promise to each other that we can go to bed angry if we want, but come morning, we talk about it over breakfast. No more putting it off for multiple days. We have to deal with it so that we can move past it.”
You considered that for a moment. “Yeah, that sounds alright.”
He took your hands in his own and dipped forward to place a soft kiss to your cheek. When he began to pull back, your hand flew up to gently encase the side of his face, holding him there as you met him halfway and kissed his lips in a physical show to prove you had accepted his apology. And if that wasn’t good enough, you whispered against his lips, “I forgive you.”
His arms circled around your waist pulling you into his lean frame in a tight hug that seemed to melt away all the stress that built between you two.
“How did you know that I would use the honey today?” you asked with a tilt of your head, figuring he must be the reason for the right lids.
“I didn’t. I tightened all the jars.”
“Benny!” you laughed, playfully slapping his bicep.
He lowered his hands behind your hips, lifting you quickly onto the kitchen countertop, grinning at the squeal you let out at the sudden shift.
“Let me make it up to you, Bunny? Please?” he begged, voice teasing but you could see the sincerity, the desperation in his ocean blue eyes.
“I’m gonna be late for work,” you giggled as he buried his face into the spot between your jaw and collarbone, that sweet spot he knew got you weak in the knees every time he placed his mouth there. “I need to leave in a few minutes.”
“You might wanna call in sick then,” he murmured against your skin as he kissed up your neck, “‘Cuz I got plans for you that’s gonna last longer than a few minutes.”
-Tag List-
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#benny apologies :)#austin butler#benny cross#benny x bunny#the bikeriders#benny cross x reader#austin butler x reader#benny x reader#fluff#imagine#austin butler fandom#austin bulter x you#johnny davis#the bikeriders x you#benny the bikeriders
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AITA for not complaining about my sex/love life?
A bit nsfw. I'll try to keep it vague.
So I (31FTM) came out and transitioned about 5 years ago. My husband (34, cis M) and I were married beforehand. He was extremely relieved, as he had realized he was gay and didn't know how to tell me. It's like a fairy tale if Disney thought we were marketable 💜 just a bit of context to what happened next.
I have a group of friends, straight cis women my age, who knew me pretransition. They were relatively supportive, minus a few confused questions and a couple of comments early on about how hard it was to remember my name.
I was out to brunch with 3 of them (K, S, L, all early 30s/late 20s). L is engaged, S recently got serious with a guy, and K is perpetually single.
We were all chatting and eventually got on the topic of romance. S was complaining that her boyfriend never did the dishes. L laughed and said she had to essentially train her fiance to do certain household chores. K piped up with some sort of "men are the worst" comment, which I just sort of ignored, until she turned to me and said "So what gets on your nerves about YOUR husband, OP?"
I shrugged and said that sometimes he leaves his socks on the floor, but that's about it. K rolled her eyes and said there had to be SOMETHING that pissed me off about him, like "he's bad in bed or doesn't listen to you." I snapped a little and told her that no, actually, I don't care what you say about your partners but mine is actually really great, and I love him. He's great in bed, he's very caring and passionate, he listens to me all the time, and I won't be convinced to shittalk him.
It got quiet and I just decided to leave cash for my part of the bill and leave. I went home to snuggle into my husband's arms on the couch and tell him what happened. He just laughed and said I could shittalk him if I wanted. I don't think he really got why I was so upset.
That afternoon, K texted me and said I really embarrassed her in front of everyone and wanted me to apologize for what I said. I refused and told her that I wasn't gonna apologize because she assumed I didn't like my husband and I corrected her. She called me a bitch and went radio silent. I texted S and L and asked them if they were okay, no response yet.
My husband thinks I should just apologize, but I don't want to say sorry for refusing to talk badly about someone who supported me during one of the hardest times of my life, even if he'd be fine with it. It just makes me feel wrong.
AITA?
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