#it might actually be easier for me bc i tend to get stuck in a lot of the technobabble or action stuff where i struggle to visualise things

[bogkeep]

the ferry ride was terrible in many ways, but doing nothing for several hours but lie down in a dark cabin and listening to the most recent murderbot diaries was. admittedly. pretty nice

[fictionfordays]

SFW Alphabet (A-Z)

Tomura Shigaraki x GN!Reader

CW: Reader is called "sweetheart", kisses, Shiggy is a bit awkward ig, mostly fluffy but some bits might be slightly angsty?

WC: >1.7k

A/N: I have been very excited to start an SFW alphabet for my Crusty King! Might be working on an NSFW one as well... Anywho, I love him! Thank you to everyone who helped me get some thoughts for a few of the letters!<3 (specifically @dabismoon, doll, you have such a brilliant mind ilysm<333) Here's the link for the sfw template I used, (I did make one or two changes though to make my life a bit easier)

Back to Main Masterlist | BNHA/MHA Masterlist

Activities – What are their favorite things to do with you? How do you spend your free time?

He loves gaming with you. You tend to play Mario Kart or random arcade games on console for your dates. He’d love to go to an actual arcade with you, but that’s not really in the cards rn so virtual arcade it is!

Boo! – How do they feel about surprises, giving and receiving?

He’s… not really sure how to feel about surprises? Like he’d be open to them? But he’s not really sure how to react if he’s the one receiving. He does like giving you surprises, but he doesn’t dress them up or make them a big deal. It’s more like: “Here, I got this for you.” *Hands you the trinket*

Comfort – How do they comfort you when you’re upset? When the tables turn, do they come to you, or try to handle it themselves?

Feelings are weird, man. He’s not really sure how to comfort you if you’re upset. It kinda depends on why you’re upset. Did someone hurt you? Not to worry bc he’ll end them. Your feelings doing a thing? Idk, he’s a little more lost on this one so he might just try to distract you with a game. If you’re really not up to anything then he’ll cuddle you quietly, a soft blush on his cheeks. He, on the other hand, does not want to be comforted. He will handle this on his own just like he always has

Dance – Do they like to dance with you? How good of a dancer are they?

Nope. No no no. He is not a dancer. He is a terrible dancer. Don’t ask, he will immediately refuse. You’ll be stuck dancing with Mr. Compress, Twice, or Toga, (maybe Dabi if you really sweeten him up)

Excitement – How do they act when they’re excited? What excites them?

He does like… a little… moan? When he gets excited? He stops scratching his skin, a small smile forming on his lips, and depending on what’s getting him excited, he may also blush or run his hand through his hair so you can actually see his whole face! There are a great many a things that you can do to get him excited: getting a new 2-player game for date nights, sometimes even flustering him (but only in private, he’s the boss afterall) He also appreciates when his plans go his way, or something works out in his favour

Future – What are their plans for the future? Do they see themselves getting married, having kids?

He’s got a world to dominate, broski. Stick with him at your own risk (I say this lovingly ofc). I don’t see him getting married, but there’s potential for a long-term partner. I also don’t see him having kids. His childhood was too problematic, plus his quirk? No thanks.

Gifts – What do they give you as presents? How often do they get you gifts?

He doesn’t get you gifts often, but he does like to gift you little trinkets when he happens upon one he thinks you’ll like. He prefers gifting you things you can do together, like multi-player games. He’d also be open to getting you a new hoodie (or more likely, acquiring a new hoodie for himself that you always end up stealing)

Hold – How do they hold you? Cuddling, sleeping, holding hands…

If this is pre-controlling his quirk, then he likes how fearlessly you hold his pinkie. Regardless, he prefers being the little spoon or having you sprawled out on top of him when sleeping if you’re cold natured

Ideal – What’s their ideal date like?

Gaming together! Besides, he’s trying to destroy the world as it is currently so… there’s not much he can do out and about

Jealousy – Do they get jealous easily? How do they handle it?

He does not get jealous easily. Not to say he doesn’t get jealous, it just doesn’t happen easily. He… does not handle it well. He can be quite short-tempered with you when he’s jealous. It can go one of two ways: 1. He lets it simmer and fester for a while before blowing up at you or 2. You notice he’s acting different and bring it up shortly after

Kisses – How do they like to kiss you? How frequently do you kiss?

He looooooves kissing you. It’s a way to show you attention and care without needing to use his hands. I feel like he loves to kiss the top of your head. And also your fingers, like your fingers are so soft compared to his!!! Kisses happen fairly frequently in private. He doesn’t like PDA, but the once in a while kiss on the cheek makes him feel soft

Love – How do they show you that they love you?

He loves to touch you. Your skin is so soft and he loves how velvet-y it feels beneath his rough fingertips. When he is having trouble going to sleep, he’ll lay next to you quietly, gaze fixated on your sleeping face while he traces your features softly. His fingers always linger on your cheeks or your waist (depending on how he’s holding you) As stated previously, he loves holding your pinkie finger, it’s just such an intimate feeling

Melt – What do you do that absolutely makes them melt?

Just the fact that you seem to genuinely care. You don’t try to change him or make him something that he’s not. You’re tender, perhaps a little shy yet straightforward with him, which I think he appreciates. You’re not afraid of him, or maybe you are but you’re good at hiding it. You… accept him

Nicknames – What do they call you, and what are their favorite things to be called?

He calls you “sweetheart” or by your name He really loves it when you call him by a shortened version of his name, like “Tomu’,” and he really loves it when you use “Tenko,” he might even like it when you call him “baby” ;)

Obvious – How obvious do they make it that they like you?

Not very obvious that he likes you at all. He expects to be rejected so he keeps his feelings to himself. If you happen to bring it up however, he’ll admit them

Pets – Do they have pets? Do they want them?

No pets, he doesn’t want any. He’s very traumatized about pets so… it would take a LOT of convincing

Quiet – How are the calm, quiet moments with them?

He’s pretty chill tbh. Relatively quiet, prefers to listen to whatever you have to say, but doesn’t mind chatting if something is on his mind. He likes sitting in the room with you, you could be doing your own thing while he games and he’s perfectly content

Romance – How romantic are they? What are their go-to ways of being romantic?

Not very romantic and very confused about what that means??? Might get an idea or two from some rom-com you make him watch, but he’s very clumsy about romance

Safe – What makes them feel safe and comfortable around you?

He won’t really be in a relationship with you if he doesn’t feel safe or comfortable in some capacity. He likes that you listen to him talking. Not just hearing his words or doing as he says but actually listening to him, asking him questions. The fact that you put zero pressure on him to behave a certain way or react a certain way is also reassuring. He enjoys spending time with you, you make him feel loved

Tend – How do they act when you’re hurt or sick, and vice versa?

If you’re hurt, his reaction depends on how you got hurt. If someone hurt you, they’re dead meat, make no mistake. If he accidently hurt you, I think he’d feel… absolutely awful and wouldn’t be able to forgive himself. He’s not really sure what to do if you feel emotionally hurt? Like, do you need a hug? If you’re sick he tries to remember how his mom would take care of him when he was sick, but it was so long ago… He does appreciate when you take care of him. If you make him some soup while he’s sick, or tend to whatever wounds he may have. You always treat him so tenderly

Unforgettable– What’s something you do or have done that they’ll never be able to forget?

Something he’ll never forget is the first time you gamed together. He barely knew your name, and he definitely didn’t peg you to be a gamer like he is. You’re so… pretty? And smart? Likeable even? Neither of you really talked while you were gaming either. Maybe a playful insult or some competitive banter here and there. That was the first time he’d ever lost a game, and he’d gladly lose again if it meant seeing your face light up when you win.

Variety – Do they prefer to keep things the same, or spice it up?

I think he prefers consistency. He’s a villain and he gets enough ~spice~ from his lil missions and whatnot. He just likes to game, leave him alone :(

Wash – What’s it like taking a bath with them, or helping them wash up after a fight?

He loves bathing with you. You’re so sweet the way you wash his hair for him. He’ll try to wash yours, too. He’ll lather up some soap to rub delicately over your skin. You’ll turn towards him, washing his face with such tenderness, a focused expression on your face as your fingers run lightly over his skin. After a bath? Also his favourite. You’re just so soft with him, moisturizing his dry skin, combing through his wet hair, loving him

XO – How do they show you affection? How much PDA are they willing to show?

He’s not really big on PDA, but he can be very affectionate in private! As I said before, he loves kissing you. He’ll lay his head in your lap if he’s tired or stressed. Expect cuddles in private, too. CUDDLING WHILE GAMING (I will die on this hill)

Yearn – What do they do when they miss you?

He doesn’t really do anything per se? He gets a little more agitated than normal, maybe. Possibly seems more distant or absent when he has to talk to say another member of the League

Zzz – How do they act when they get sleepy? How is it sleeping in the same bed?

When he’s sleepy, he gets a bit more cuddly. He can also be a little shorter-tempered, depending on how tired he is

Tags: @tired-teacher-blog @a-contemplation-upon-flowers​ @enchantedforest-network @nanamis-wifey-reye

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I do not own these characters. All rights to the original creators. All content—created rights are reserved to Wallabypirate©2023.

[hualianisms]

✦ what was your easiest fic to write & your hardest?

☉ what do you do when you get stuck writing?

✄ what’s your editing process?

✎ how do you think readers would guess a fic was yours if you posted anonymously?

tysm for the ask!! 🩵🩵 be prepared for a lot of yapping

✦ what was your easiest fic to write & your hardest?

easiest fic: this is a bit of a hard qn bc ive written 58 fics so far through the years and i forgot half the things i wrote kfjjfj but id say, the easiest was probably my first ever real fic, i.e. this hualian hurt/comfort fic where hc has a nightmare of the 100 swords scene. it was the first thing i wrote right after finishing reading tgcf and i wrote it all in one go and the dialogue & actions & characterization flowed so easily, i could picture the scene so easily in my head (which doesn't always happen for me). and writing hualian felt like the easiest thing in the world bc back in 2020 every little detail about them as characters and as a ship was imprinted in my mind so vividly... i miss those days 😔 my memory abilities have deteriorated since then

otherwise, iirc my first ever fengqing fic and my fenglian poem were also very easy to write

hardest fic: 😭😭 this could be so many of my fics tbh, there's so many i struggle so much with.. especially the unfinished wips, bc everything i actually posted means it wasn't the hardest, since i actually managed to finish them

but among my posted wips, i definitely struggled with the earlier chapters of my hualian fake dating au very badly at the earlier chapters and almost gave up on it which was why there was a 1-2 year gap btwn updates 😭😭 i actually went into a 1-2 year long burnout right after posting chap 1. luckily though, the most recent chapters got much better for me, finally reached a part of the story that's much easier and more fun to write (except that i wrote myself into a bit of a corner so ive been brainstorming how to get out of it). i just struggle a lot with multichaps bc my executive dysfunction issues make it very overwhelming for me to plot things. but im very determined to see this fic through to the end and finish my first ever multichap!

there's a lot more i struggled with - usually longer fics, fics for a new fandom (especially visual media fandoms. book/text-based fandoms are much easier bc you already have a canon peek into their character voice and narration style), non-canon ships that need a lot of wrangling to be believable, fics where i worry a lot about being ooc, fics that need action scenes or a real plot

the rest of the qns answered under the cut:

☉ what do you do when you get stuck writing?:

😭 it depends on why im stuck. i might ask someone for help w characterization. sometimes i just go for a jog/walk to clear my head and it works, otherwise if im rly stuck, especially plot-wise, I'll procrastinate and put the fic off for weeks/months

✄ what’s your editing process?

just rereading my own draft and rewriting or filling in the blanks where i feel like it can be better or is missing smth. i don't cut scenes often unless they're really bad. sometimes i rearrange entire paragraphs around to make them flow better

✎ how do you think readers would guess a fic was yours if you posted anonymously?

this is an apt question bc i have 2 anon fics rn and had a few in the past that i took off anon a couple of years later.. i think the easiest way to tell is my authors' notes. in both start & end notes i tend to yap + i usually apologize a lot in the start notes

besides that maybe fic titles (mitski). i think the genres and writing tone/vibe through my 50+ fics have varied a lot so i don't think that would be distinctive.. id be interested to hear if my writing style is distinctive bc i have no idea myself 🤔 i know i have some phrases i reuse across fics though (trying to work on that issue), and a bad habit of having long sentences sometimes (ive really been working on reducing this issue)

(send me an ask from the fic ask game part 1 or the fic ask game part 2)

[warlordfelwinter]

stature, motion, roots and change for anyone you're thinking about!

[character design asks]

Fiver, of course!

stature: What's your OC's body type? How tall are they? Do they wear clothing to accentuate their look or do they try to mask it?

he's lean but muscular, the body of someone who's been an archer for like 20+ years. he's extremely strong, but fast and limber as well, so he's not very bulky. i hc viera as being sort of predisposed toward having nice meaty muscular legs (bnuny), but he's proportionally balanced across the board cause that sort of longbow use would give him really nice arms. and back. (basically he's hot. imo. and his kick could shatter bone.) funnily enough the sliders in ffxiv have actual numbers attached to them so i know he's 6' 1.4" for the most part he wears clothing that's practical above anything else, but that would tend to accentuate his figure just bc snugger clothes would be easier to move in than baggy or flowy things. can't risk something getting caught on your bow in the middle of a fight you know. when he's not in danger of getting into battle (rare) he tends to wear things that show a lot of skin. not bc he's trying to be sexy, he just finds it comfortable. and like look at the starter viera gear, showing skin is cutural for them skld;gn

motion: How does your OC move? How does their clothing help or hinder their range of motion? Are they flexible, coordinated, clumsy?

he's extremely in control of his body. very flexible, very graceful, very precise. every movement is made with purpose. if he starts being clumsy, it's probably because he hasn't slept or eaten properly in several days or something and someone needs to hit him over the head and force him to go take a break. and he always dresses in things that allow for movement. i think restrictive clothing of any sort would start to make him feel claustrophobic

roots: Is your OC's look inspired by any specific style of clothing or fashion trend? What are the roots and/or inspiration for their look?

no, not really. i mean, since he's a video game character i don't really think about designing outfits for him like i might with a dnd character or something. his look is whatever i think looks neat in the game at the time. his old bard outfit with the warg pants was "inspired by" (taken directly from) an outfit someone posted on eorzea collection. most of his fits are just armor sets as is or dyed bc i'm not very good at mixing and matching (and a lot of the sets are just so good anyway)

change: Has your OC ever drastically changed their appearance? Significant haircuts, big tattoos, complete wardrobe swap, etc? Why? How do they feel about the change?

complete wardrobe change and drastic haircut at about the same time, actually. this part of his canon to me began as an in-game thing of me using the free makeover ticket i got to give him his cute bob bc i was tired of his long hair clipping with outfits, and since then it's expanded to the lore side with me deciding that up until the beginning of heavensward, he stuck with his wood warder gear as well. the beginning of heavensward you're a fugitive, so fiver gave some small effort toward changing his looks (viera are so rare so i don't think it really helped, but he tried his best) and chopped his hair off and changed out his rava gear for more eorzean fashion. he felt strange and reluctant about making the decision, but once he saw himself in a mirror after his hair had been cut and wearing something just wildly different from his wood warder armor, he felt more like himself than he ever had. he still has his old gear, but he hasn't put it on since.

[sol-consort]

I don’t really write for stuff that I don’t have OCs in because I just find it easier than writing with pre-established characters since I know everything about my OCs and I don’t have the fear of mischaracterizing a character accidentally.

Plus I think if I did write for Once it’d be a fix-it fic that’s fixes so much it’s a completely different story and not even about Once lmao.

The only fandoms I have stories planned for that have a lot of focus on pre-established characters are Far Cry, Fallout, The Outer Worlds, and Mass Effect which is apart of The Outer Worlds story but an OC is the protagonist of most of those stories.

Actually I think the only fandoms that I have stories planned for where the main focus is majority OCs is Star Wars and Baldur’s Gate/D&D.

If I were to ever write for Once it’d be finishing the Frankenstein storyline that they never finished even when the actor came back.

A good Fairytale x D&D thing would be Dimension 20’s Neverafter season which did a really good job and is an inspiration for A Bard’s Plague although Neverafter is heavy on the horror elements while I’m sticking with just the fantasy elements. You can only watch Neverafter on Dropout though but the first episode is on their YouTube.

A Fairytale crossover thing I wanna try out is A Wolf Among Us. I do plan on doing a noir story for A Bard’s Plague but that’ll be its own separate thing in like a 1920s/1940s version of the D&D world because to me I don’t think a true Noir setting can fit into fantasy like how Victorian England or Wild West America can because it’s a little too close to modern days for me.

Dimension 20 used to be my favourite! Especially Brennan as a DM, he is really creative and fun! I used to think dnd was all serious and boring. Critical role just didn't hit it for me no matter how many times I tried, but Brennan made DnD look very fun and colourful for a beginner while critical role felt intimidating.

I used to be subscribed to dropout bc of it but also found really good shows. Eventually, I drifted off and didn't watch it anymore, so I cancelled it. Might reinstall it to see what's new.

And yeah I get the fear of mischaracterisation, but it is one of the investable things you have to swallow when writing any fanfics. No one will ever be true to the source material no matter how much we try, especially if you're one person and the source has a team of writers. Not a single one of those writers could nail the character on their own and they'd need the whole team to make it come alive.

It's a bitter truth we all have to accept eventually that our favourite characters are viewed by us through many lenses and biases. We can't understand them fully and we can't give them justice fully, we can't fly too close to the sun we may only skirt by and do good enough.

Each writer has a different spin on each character. I found out that I tend to make characters softer, more gentle, and lonely when I write them. I flush out their inner vulnerability more, focus on the thoughts inside their brain rather than their own dialogue more. I put a piece of my soul in each one of them.

And it makes me happy, the way I portray them. It's not everyone's taste and that's fine. It's my own spin on them to make them more desperate, more lovestruck and put an emphasis on their emotions. I rarely add dialogue unless absolutely necessary for the scene to progress.

I say find your own spin, there is no correct way to write it. You'll always mischaracterize the character in someone else's eyes. Sometimes the shows itself do it to their own characters. Even the writer teams are still human by the end of the day.

Perfectionism is a disease that kills creativity and keeps you stuck in a prison of your own mind's design.

It sneaks up on you too, you never notice when did you start caring for this and that until you've spent three hours on the same scene because the way the character says a particular sentence just doesn't fit at all.

Let them say the damn sentence, to hell with it all. Worst people would do is click away from your fic, and 90% of them weren't even gonna leave likes even if they enjoyed reading it so save yourself the headache and make life and writing easier for you.

Standards should be for how much you enjoy the piece you've written not for how much it meets a list of requirements.

Also oh my god you like star wars and I have been making fun of star wars nonstop. Ofhwofhd I am so sorry, I have never actually seen any of the movies, I don't know anything about it. It's just a bit I keep doing for the gag and nothing else.

A wolf among us, is that the tellatell game? I loved it before! The concept was so good even tho I don't remember the plot by now, it's been years.

Talking about fairytale spin offs, this reminded me of an old cartoon movie about little riding hood.

This one on youtube. Hoodwinked

It blew my mind as a kid, I was a huge detective conan fan (still am but shh) and making it a murder mystery with all the plot twists and characters just made my brain melt.

Nothing will ever compare to the rush of being around 10 and seeing this movie for the first time.

Actually I'm gonna go watch it again, fucking masterpiece. Give it a try if you have an hour to spare.

[moduloxii]

𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐍𝐄𝐑 !                

knowing  your  writing  partners  can  make  writing  together  a  lot  easier .  repost ,  DON���T reblog .

NAME: Meluna

PRONOUNS:  Strictly HE/HIM !

PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION: Discord! Tumblr IMs are trash but I'd rather those for non mutuals adfhjk

NAME OF MUSE(S):  Toshi Ukuwa (OC), Minamimoto Shou and Sakuraba Neku! May pick up some more along the way, but we'll see!

EXPERIENCE / HOW LONG: I've been on tumblr since 2014ish? I took a break from tumblr RP from 2021 to 2023 and was only RPing on discord but... I decided to come back because I wanted to make new friends!

BEST EXPERIENCE: Being able to explore characters thoroughly and making friends along the way!

RP PET PEEVES:  I'm honestly not too fussy? I tend to adapt to my partner's writing so I might write differently with different people... The only thing I cannot respond to is like, script style. It's too boring for me LOL. I like having things to work with!

MUSE PREFERENCES FOR ANGST / FLUFF / SMUT: 

Angst: They did actually called me Sadist King in a fandom once because I had the reputation of making people cry with my angst comics... TLDR: love it but especially if there's a good payoff bc angst for the sake of angst is kinda eh

Fluff: Cuddly snuggles and kisses? Aww hell yeah, but only when it's earned. General wholesome threads? Yum yum.

Smut: I can write smut but absolutely not here LOL I have to have a lot of trust in someone to be able to write smut with them. If for some reason our muses are super compatible and reach that point and you do wanna write some spices, I do implore you ask we write in like idk discord or something.

PLOTS OR MEMES: I love both! I think because I'm stepping into a space with a lot of veterans, plotting is particularly important... I do love the unpredictableness of memes though. If I plot too much (from start to middle to end), I admittedly lose interest. Usually just plotting a little at the start and letting the muses go wild is my preferred way to go! Makes it fun. Sometimes muses don't like going by the script anyways.

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: These days I don't really care as long as I have something to work with. Because RP is collaborative writing, I personally try my best to give my partner something to work with while also pushing the story along. But all in all, I guess I prefer longer? Single sentences (if not deliberate for impact or wtv) can get me pretty stuck.

BEST TIME TO WRITE: I am super sporadic but I'm usually around at night time JST. Like, 7pm - 5am because *laughs in gay vampire*

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE:  If we're talking Mr Minamans? GOD no, he is too much of a genius. Me? I am a himbo. So himbo that I got gaslit into marrying a third anime husband. As for Ukuwa, I like to think I am not THAT mean...! He certainly does share my traits of like workaholicism and functioning off of guilt though. I also gave him all of my CPTSD but he's more of an attack than fawn like me.

tagged: haha i stole it   tagging: Feel free to yoink this from me!

[moltengoldveins]

@hiddenintheveil thank you for the questions veil??? Holy crap??? okokok here we go:

9 times/ 10 she goes for trident combat + net, which I really wish was more effective in the actual game bc holy crap the ability to maneuver yourself around??? By tossing your weapon??? Incredible. If she’s got to pick a classic Minecraft weapon, it’s the axe, Techno just ended up teaching her more and that was the one they settled on. She’s decent at longer weapons, too, but it’s kinda just understood that the ranged stuff sticks with Phil. (Actually the opposite of me irl? Do not recite the deep magic of Minecraft arrow physics to me witch, I was there when they were written, version 1.0, practicing Daily)

she’s got an armor set, and it’s actually pretty heavyweight for someone in her weight class with her combat style: usually, trident + net combat is easier with light armor. But Techno is Techno (married to the Grind) and Phil is Phil (paranoia like nobody’s business) and Mati has a stubborn streak to rival a male goat, so she stuck with it till she could move as effectively in plate as she could without. It’s pretty nondescript, shape wise, but she’s taken a lot of time on trips, etching failsafes into the enchantment runes: if you look close, the whole thing is covered.

she tends towards the deep purples and sky blues of the Antarctic flag, plus the occasional white and gold accent. I’m gonna have to draw her in color at some point tbh.

the necklace is actually a window in the shirt which is a bit sheer. It’s rather poorly drawn mostly cause I haven’t settled in a design, but I have a headcanon that endermen/enderian hybrids have pearls in their chest cavities set about where their sternum would be and hardcores have ender eyes. I also have Thoughts about how this relates to the stronghold lore and the ender dragon lifecycle but I digress: it’s normal for Enders in general to wear clothes that expose the chest because the pearl can get irritated. It’s slightly less common for hardcores to do so (there’s some cultural sigma around that) but Phil’s done his best to beat the self prejudice out of Mati as best he can. (Also handily gives our favorite wet cat of a man an excuse in story to wear boob window AND support his adoptive daughter, 10/10 I call this a win.)

her speech patterns are atrocious, which I’m honestly just basing off myself. She code switches like it’s going out of style, she’s picked up the rounded vowels of Phil’s speech, his slang, Techno’s dropped consonants, and the oddly stilted way Brian and the Voices tend to speak, with emphasis on the wrong words. She’s also working with a very different second language, as Enderian is largely click and hiss based, so that tends to come through in her speech. Piglin also has a layered structure to it: the words come completely without secondary meaning, but there’s a lower pitched tone, like a hum or a growl, beneath the words which provides a ton of additional meaning and depth. This is why Techno Sounds Like That and also why he can barely communicate with people who only speak Common. Mati picked up on that a few years in since Phil started mimicking it barely six months into knowing Techno, so there’s usually an uncomfortable staticky baseline to everything she says. It’s honestly a pain to try and listen to her sometimes.

the bracelets are a religious thing from the End-based churches that worship Kristin and a convenient way to keep enchantments on hand when armor isn’t allowed; nobody’s gonna insist you remove religious symbols, might as well make them useful too. She started wearing them half as a joke, half as an actual gesture towards Mumza, a sort of ‘yeah you can’t be here all the time, but you’re still family.’

the hair is, like Techno, from my headcanon that Blood God adherents don’t cut their hair except in specific (bad) circumstances.

her eyes are Crap. Like, she needs heccin Glasses. She can make out her surroundings, but reading isn’t happening without a good thicc pair of glasses and distance vision is crappy too. Envision if you will her and Techno with the same glasses doing the same ‘holding tablet/book out as far as they can whilst squinting and looking down their noses thru the glasses perched at the very tip of said noses’

alright. It’s self-inset week on this illustrious hellsite, and I’m unlearning shame, so here’s a self-insert for the pseudo-MCYT universe I have meticulously constructed in my brain that had only a passing resemblance to the actual canon:

Her Deal is that she’s an Enderian who, for various reasons, got picked up by Emduo during a midlife crisis arc after the end of the (general) events of SMP earth. She was caught in the rain, pretty badly burned, and had no local support system. Their intentions at first were to find her a place to stay while traveling, since mortals have a rough time around gods for long periods of time. However, (because I tend not to give my self inserts a lot of powers, but when I do, they’re powers I think I'd actually have) they find that, while she isn’t the most physically gifted, she has an unparalleled ability to just…. Mentally Handle Bullcrap Beyond Mortal Ken. She isn’t the kind of person to be phased by either a walrus Or a fairy at her doorstep, that kind of thing. They have few rough patches with her being too stubborn to get along well with Techno but it evens out eventually, and she’s good with Brian (the crow) so they kinda just… let her stick around as they travel.

She’s a hardcore, so her aging quits after a few years of ‘just traveling, trying to find you a home, we swear.’ She ends up a Blood God adherent later on, (I have Headcanons about the blood god that are too complicated to explain here, the gist of it is that most gods have ‘chats’ in one way or another but the BG is basically the only one to have a Chat that just Sucks That Much for their adherents. Mari’s chat is pretty dang small, and they are restrained to her pov. Techno’s the only BG adherent with an omniscient chat.) and over time, their relationship goes from ‘kinda uncles’ to ‘those are my weird parents, thanks.’ Sometimes a family can be two demigods, the Lady of death, and a funky little teleporter with severe sensory impairment. (Sucky vision, hypersensitive hearing)

She’s absent from the events of the DSMP for any number of reasons, (depends on my mood tbh. She’s fun in the DSMP, but she’s also nearly as fun when slapped randomly in another media property entirely and attempting desperately to get home, I’m a sucker for dimension hopping AUs) but pops back in at least once, enough to meet Tommy and be aware of Wilbur’s loss. Her dynamic with Will was rough, and her dynamic with Tommy distant, but she saw the potential in the bedrock bros dynamic, even when said bros are on the outs.

Post-DSMP (good ending, the people we love live and are friends) she spends the vast majority of her time doing physical labor around the family house, learning how to build with Phil, and helping Beeduo with Michael. She’s nowhere near Emduo in combat skill, but she was taught by them for a long time, which means she’s still good enough to draw even with Tommy, ten months into his training regularly with Techno. She still can’t manage to beat Tubbo in a fair fight, no teleportation. (he’s small and jacked and fast ok, she’s no good at countering that)

honestly I just like the idea that Emduo at some point in their however many hundreds of years picked up a slightly-too-neurospicy-for-their-own-good-child and couldn’t find a way to get rid of them fast enough to keep from getting attached, and I personally enjoy having enough platonic relationships with the characters I care about in that fandom to excuse any random plot point I feel like writing about XD it’s a convenient overlap that has created a pretty fun character :)

[lion-buddy]

Thoughts on the Tanjiro and Nezuko role swap au?

Oh i love the swap au!! I think abt it alot in my own time. Ive always wanted to like, make my own content abt it but i tend to get pretty stuck on the mechanics of everything

Like, taking the world building of kny and applying it to a swap is super interesting to me, and i like trying to work it out. But there are a lot of specifics in kny that are harder to work around in a swap au. But thats not a bad thing! If anything it leads to more interesting story telling because it ensures that the swap isnt to 1 to 1. its just, a lot of work. and would take a lot of planning. If i were to like, write out a timeline of how i think the swap au would go, id have to figure out exactly how the mechanics and all the plot reasoning first. Cuz the way i see, it once you establish the world and lore rules, you can better mold the characters around that. 

To start, demon tanjiro is such an interesting concept on its own. I feel hes the easier of the two to establish a character for, because we have his canon series counterpart to go off of. We can pick and choose from the many traits we’re given in canon and apply them to demon tanjiro, and its really fun reinterpreting them.  Demon tanjiro basically takes the whole Im The Eldest Sibling trait to the extreme, and turning it into what giudes his reasoning now that he's stuck in a demon mindset (presumably similar to canon nezukos). Older Brother tanjiro is the best. :D  

I can still see him being that little ray of sunshine he always is and just, being stuck to nezukos side at all time, whether it be in protection, or just wanting to help her with daily tasks. Like a lost little puppy <:D. Hes just fueled by the desire to be productive and helpful because that's where he thrives, and hes just going to do what feels correct in his little demon mind. I can see him like, taking things out of nezukos hands wordlessly to carry for her because his reasoning is, “little sister shouldnt be the one carrying everything. Im the eldest sibling! I will do the heavy lifting for her!! >:[].” meanwhile nezuko just like, “brother can i pls have my bento box back pls i appreciate ur help but that's not what i need <:3!!” hes just trying to help in anyway he can, even if he doesn't fully understand why/what hes doing. 

I feel tanjiros presence would also be very important to nezuko. Shes young, and the only one there for her is her demon brother. While hes not able to speak, nezuko would still have one sided conversations with him. And in moments wheres shes unsure of what to do, she’d just think, “what would oniichan do?” because even if he can’t offer advice now, he’s still her older brother, and she looks up to him, demon or not.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Roleswap nezuko is interesting. We already have such a well established personality for tanjiro, but nezuko can be a little tricky since we dont have a lot to go off of in canon. Theres bits and pieces we can take and interpret to the best of our abilities, and it kinda makes it more fun (for me at least) cuz we get to see how people interpret her character in so many different ways. :]

i actually came up with a design for her! nezuko is canonically good a sewing, or at least knows how to. her haori is made of up her old kimono and obi. i feel the checker pattern is important to keep because its kinda what all the kamados wear. also shorts/hand cropped uniform pants. i wanted to do pants but they didnt mesh well with her black leg wraps </3 (also pluggin my old hair timeline post bc its relevant <3)

(i didnt design a swap tanjiro bc hed just look like ep 1 tanjiro but muzzled. but he might have an outfit change like nezuko did in ep one.)

My TLDR version of early story swap nezuko is basically: During the beginning of her journey as a official demon slayer, she is veryyyy determined to change tanjiro back to a human as fast as she can, and is essentially bee-lining it from mission to mission. People are fine, but she is not going to linger for too long if she doesnt have to. Shes got her brother! And thats all the company she needs :]. this of course changes as she meets, trains, and fights alongside other people. She learns to slow down and appreciate the people around her more and how they can help her cause too.

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When trying to write out how the events of a swap au would go, i try to take nezukos character into mind ensure her experiences are different from tanjiros. Because they're different characters, different people, even if they face off against the same demon/character, they're going approach it differently, and have different takeaways from the things they experience

Now as much as i would love to write out/draw detailed scenes, that's a lot of work and planning and time that i do not really have atm. And i'd need to figure out A Lot of in world mechanics in order to create something I would be proud of. But in the meantime, i can establish a scene with nezukos' emotional beats to get a feel for her :D!

In the giyu confrontation scene in ep 1, nezukos first “emotional” arc would have a very different setup, almost opposite to tanjiros. When giyu steals the now fully demon tanjiro from nezuko, she’d be really angry at him. Shes angry someone thinks they can just take her brother away from her, dare to hurt him even, just because they think theyre stronger, just because think they know whats right (giyu ofc is just doing his best but. she doesnt know that </3). At first she’d try to retaliate, fight back immediately, in any way she physically can to get tanjiro back, but of course it wouldnt work out very gracefully. Shes no where near skilled enough to face a hashira, but she doesnt care. Her actions are blinded by her grief and rage from any rational thought. All she sees is this man stabbing her brother, threatening to kill him, and shes the only one who can save him. she has too. hes all shes got left. and this man is in threatening that. She’d tire herself out pretty quickly and fall to the ground, to tired to make another move. When giyu sees this, she’d get talked at for being too brash, running into a situation without thinking, without a plan, with only a goal in mind and no way to execute it. In a battle, you need to remember the people that youre trying to protect, not just the target youre trying to destroy. You need to remember who youre fighting for, cuz you cant fight for them if youre dead. Anyway funny axe throw scene now [insert plot things that happen that i have yet yo work out yet because the involve swap tanjiro. hes gonna be intersting] and we’re done. Even if her efforts to save her brother didnt turn out, there is potential to hone that determination into something, and giyu recognizes this. He believes that its something nezuko can effectively use if trained properly, maybe even help her find answers for her brother. After waking up, giyu would send the kamados off to urokodakis to be trained.

TLDR nezuko has really bad tunnel vision <3

We’re told in canon that Nezuko was not afraid to stand up to an adult if they were being mean, even if she's the smaller one in the situation. This trait is exhibited through her actions in Nezuko vs Daki, and I thought it was good scene to reference for how this scene might play out. i find the situation to be similar here. While it may seem out of her gentle character archetype, weve seen time and time again how fiercely she protects the people she cares about. hell, we even see her do the same thing in this scene in ep 1 when tanjiro is passed out!! In this moment if swap, she’s in shock, having just lost her entire family. she has already broke, this is just pushing it!!

i reallly wanna write more for this post but it is already. long lol. i have a few blurbs of texts about certain topics, and hopefully i can share them someday because i!! really like thinking abt this stuff! i really want to solidify and share my interpretation of demon tanjiro and how he works. things like how nezuko approaches battle and her overall fighting style. how the kamados fight together and help each other protect those they care about. maybe one day!

[yamagucji]

some tips for writing blogs, especially those who are just starting out. these are some things that works for me and may or may not work for others.

how to add a read more link on mobile

type :readmore: on a free space, then hit the enter or return button

personally i think they’re very helpful because it lessens the space you take up in your dash, and might encourage more people to rb

+ you can also add this on a spot where it gives a sort of cliffhanger, essentially making people want to ‘read more’

headers, banners, and dividers

though not necessary, it’s good to have a title for your work. make sure it’s bold and doesn’t blend in with your notes (aka pairing, warnings, etc.). this also helps when someone wants to look up one of your works in your search bar

i don’t really make banners or covers for my works. but some good apps that i know of would be picsart and canva. if you’re looking for ideas, i definitely recommend going into canva

wondering how to make those really small, thin dividers? you can make them using picsart! to make a divider hit tools > free crop > brush > size (adjust it to your preference > then draw a line along the edge of your photo > save

using the divider you just saved, go back to picsart and edit it again > draw option > hit rainbow square at the bottom left corner > hit suction/droplet symbol right below the check mark > color in the white spots bc for some reason picsart glitches and makes dividers look white-ish

new blog? just opened an account?

this is gonna sound really frustrating. but... tumblr needs to check if you’re a bot or not. what does this mean? it’s likely that your first few posts won’t show up on the search bar. you may not even get to edit your header/pfp yet ://

this happened to me and there was no visibility on my account at ALL. what helped me get ‘verified’ is that i followed a LOT of accounts, liked a bunch of posts, made some posts here and there. now that lets tumblr know you’re not a bot

visibility

the tumblr tagging system usually only allows the first 5 tags in your post to show up. so, what can do you about this? only use FIVE or less tags in your post. wait about 15 minutes or more until you can add some more tags in your post, and they usually all show up like that

another important thing about using tags is not to generalize! especially if you’re using a popular tag. but also don’t specify it too much where barely anyone looks it up. for example, if you’re writing a gn piece about oikawa, i recommend you use the tags such as: oikawa x reader, haikyuu x reader, oikawa x gn!reader, haikyuu headcanons, etc

a good rule of thumb is to use character x reader tags first, then leave the full name or fandom tag last

FOR NSFW: tumblr doesn’t let any tags with nsfw show up. so, give your nsfw works another tag. maybe #namegetspicy idk, you figure it out

FOR WARNINGS: especially if you’re a dark content creator, i highly encourage you to add tw:xyz tags. if you already have a warning note at the top then that’s great. but even better for readers who prefer to actually block these tags that way they never get to see it

another important thing to note is that people have different timezones. it helps if you rb your work at a different time of the day, in case people missed it! (icymi) i’ve noticed that reblogging helps to make your post show up in the tags

interaction + feedback

first and foremost, you are not obligated to write for your followers, and neither are your followers obligated to interact with you. remember that everyone has their own individual lives, and they have their own things to do— so do you, too.

make friends! become mutuals with other writers, visit their ask box. i know it can be daunting having to initiate these things, but you might just turn out to have fun! you can’t expect people to interact with you if you’re not interacting (back). it’s... kind of a two way thing yk? no need to be afraid to interact with other writers. oh, and rb other writers works!

pspsps join tag games or do ask games. it’s fun and very interactive

it never hurts to ask for feedback. i usually do this in a more subtle way because i don’t really expect a full on analysis on my works. maybe a little, is this okay? or feedback appreciated. sometimes it takes a little bit of coaxing for the silent readers

formatting your posts and blog

i generally put in the title at the top in big, bold letters

then comes the header/divider. helps to make the post more... visually appealing ig?

it’s important to add warnings (if any) and the pairing. the audience is not all female, and it might be a little frustrating for male readers having to find out its an x fem reader piece like halfway through your fic

if you have multiple works posted, it’s really really helpful to have a navigation page!

you can organize the posts you make with tags! for example, if you’re shitposting, you can use a specific tag for that. if you have a nsfw related post (ESPECIALLY when your blog is open to the general audience) please make a tag for it

themes + colors

if you have a color in mind but don’t know which direction to go from there, i recommend looking up color + aesthetic

looking to use the same color? download a name color app that’ll give you a hex code for any color you want to use. then, you can type in that hex code for when you’re choosing a color for your tumblr bio

wondering how to make your header image small like mine? just choose a photo for your header and turn off the stretch image option

want to use a different text color that tumblr doesn’t offer? it’s not as complicated as you think. you’ll have to go on a desktop to do this and do some html (but trust me, it’s not very difficult). look up “HTML noob but trying my best - how to use colored text on desktop”

^^ i don’t have the link for the color text tutorial so you can try looking it up

how to make an aesthetic navi and masterlist

step 1: decide a theme! if you’re stuck, think about a character + color/season/mood or look up “[insert] aesthetic” to find some inspiration. or you can try looking at other blogs too

step 2: find a color scheme! it’s easier if you choose fewer colors. if you want to use the same color for both divider and text, download a color name app in order to get the hex code of that color.

step 3: add categories to your navi! most navigation pages include a link to masterlist, about/byi, and rules. your navi should have a title that indicates that it’s... a navigation page. you can add thin colored dividers with the same color to make it easier for followers to navigate

step 4: you can choose to create a ‘cover’ or a picture for your navigation and masterlist! again, i recommend you use the canva app as a starting point

extra: search up emoticon symbols to spice up your titles!

reminder for you as a writer

you’re not obligated to do any of these things. i’ve noticed that we tend to build pressure on ourselves when it comes to content and interaction. remember, this !! is !! for !! fun !! when you realize that it’s no longer fun, then know that it’s time to take a break. and there’s nothing wrong with a bit of self care.

^^ c/p from this post lol

at the end of the day, follower count and interaction doesn’t define you. again for the love of beings, you’re here on your own accord.

will be adding more if needed/asked.

[milkacchan]

Request for anon: Can I have Present mic, Aizawa, and all might where they learn their young student is fatherless? Like... their father walked out/went to prison when they were young. I'm sorry if this is time consuming, but I can't stop sobbing over my father.

I'm the situation baby but remember it wasn't your fault

I changed it up a little bit with Mics- I hope you don't mind

Present Mic:

• from the getgo something was wrong

• The moment you walked into class he could tell

• You looked like shit

• Dark bags under your eyes, hair messily brushed, just to get it out if your face, and your eyes were a light red.

• You didn't look particularly happy to be there either

• something turns in his stomach, a gut feeling that something really had went down

• And he hated seeing his students upset

• but he was relatively close to you to begin with, his felt different

• He felt like he had to do something

• Everyone settled into their seats as the bull rung but his eyes remained on you

• You honestly didn't pay attention during the lesson

• He could tell as much

• class finishes and the bell rings but you sit still, and it's not until most of the students have trickled out of the room do you start packing up

• He walks over and kneels in front of the desk "You okay there? You don't look so good," he looks concerned and his heart drops when he sees your lip start to quiver

• It takes you 0.27 seconds to break and you're frantically wiping your eyes as sobs wrack your body

• He's got his arms wrapped around you in seconds and you're leaning into his shoulder.

• He isn't sure exactly how long you're crying for but eventually you calm down enough to get out a coherent sentence

• "My-My dad was arrested Friday night. He won't tell me why- he won't let anyone else tell me why and I don't know what else to do," you cry, "I miss him so much and its only been a few days- I don't- I don't have anyone else, Mr. Hazashi,"

• And you're crying again.

• He has you take the rest of the day off, in fact he takes the day with you

• He calls in a sub (you don't know what strings he had to pull for that but you don't ask, at this point you don't care) and you two dip

• He takes you to get food, real food, that'll make you feel better

• He knows that'll help a little

• and after that he takes you to get something sweet- that tends to help mood and blood pressure and anxiety

• So he does his best with you

• He nutures you the best way he knows how

• if you need anything and I mean ANYTHING this man has you covered

• He does his best to step up in any way he can

• first off he extends his assignment deadlines and cancels two tests. Who needs them anyway.

• And you eat lunch in his classroom because he can well tell you don't want to talk to anyone else right now

• He closes it off (seemingly) so in reality its just you and him

• He'll probably tell Aizawa too but on the downlow (just so he knows)

• When holidays roll around, the dorms close.

• In this case- he let's you stay with him. He has an extra bedroom. He doesn't want you to stay in an empty house.

• You also get his phone number (which you gladly use) for anything really

• Bored? He'll deliver some shitty puns.

• Confused about homework? Text him.

• having a mental breakdown? He's got you covered.

• You got memes? Please for the love of God send them to him.

• The dynamic eventually shifts to a VERY father daughter relationship.

• He knows he'll never replace your dad. He understands that wholeheartedly, but he wants you to have someone

• He actually gets a letter from your dad, thanking him for taking care of you

• but he really doesn't mind

Aizawa:

• He had a feeling that there was something going on at home. Or rather, a lack of something.

• He's dealt with it in the oast- with himself and with past students and current ones

• Shinsou

• I mean, aside from that fact whenever parents were mentioned, you'd either stiffen up or wrinkle your nose

• You didn't really like the subject of parents

• There was an essay prompt about parents (nothing too personal) nd you ended up writing it on the extinction of dinosaurs and why God fucked up instead

"It'd be absolutely stellar to see huge lizards roaming the earth and occasionally stepping on people, you know? Jurassic park was onto something."

• Man's couldn't even fail you on it because it was written v well

• Anyway, he doesn't pry too much. He just silently figures it out by process if elimination and pattern.

• He doesn't really care too much

• In the sense if it doesn't define you and he doesn't help you because he pities you

• he helps you because he seems potential

• He takes you under his wing with shinsou

• Yall spend a whole summer training

• And that's when it all came out

• It was an accident really.

• Shinsou was tired, exhausted really

• and when people get tired- that tired- sometimes they spout random shot they wouldn't usually say

• and thats what he did

• he went on about his home life

• and if he could, you could too right?? You could trust them.

• "My dad walked out when I was a kid. Little, like 3. I have a few pictures of him holding me, but I guess it wasn't enough. I don't have any desire to meet him. Not anymore. But it left me feeling like I did something wrong? I guess? Which I suppose is why I train. Because then I feel strong. Which is a good difference from how it usually feels."

• He knew it.

• He called it.

• He was right again.

• He reassures you that you are good enough, strong enough, and his decision to leave had nothing to do with you

• and when he saw you give him a soft smile, he warmed.

• I mean really, it only goes up from there

• he'll deny it, or grumble under his breath, but he seems you two as his own

• Like these aren't my kids but they are my kids

• When dorms close on holiday yall get to stay because that's where he lives too

• Like if you chose too

• he's not gonna force you to stay but if you don't want to go home, you don't have too

• He has that power

• He will buy you food

• all you gotta do is ask

• and he'll roll his eyes and grumble something he doesn't really mean, just secretly happy that you feel comfortable enough around him to ask for something

• lmao family group chat

S: 'Hey Mr. Aizawa I found this cat. Hold on lemme send a pic'

A: 'Dont need a pic. Bring him home'

Y: 'What if he's ugly??'

A: 'gremlin. Bring him home.'

Or

Y: 'Hey I saw this tweet that said 'kids be like watch this and do a half roundhouse spin kick clap and waste my fucking time' and it make me think of you.'

S: @ mr. Aizawa when he has to watch deku do sumn

Y: Lmaoooo like when he threw the baseball

S: LMAOO

A: Me watching you too try to figure out how to beat me in training

Y: Yikes bro

S: That was a rough one

• Does he regret giving you and shinsou his number??

• Maybe

• Not really

• Lmao super secret lunch movie days

• Every week on wendesday yall watch a movie. Usually it takes 2 or 3 days to watch the movie since lunch is only 70 minutes

• @ you accidently calling him dad one day and shinsou snickering but it stuck

• dadzawa lmaoo

Allmight:

• Man's has 2 underlings.

• You and Deku.

• Picked you up when he started teaching at UA

• Ion know let's say one day you popped off bc he said some dumb shit and you were like no sir that's clearly wrong

• schooled him in his own damn subject

• the other kids were like 😳

• what the fuck

• Anyway

• He see's you have potential

• And though he's not the best teacher, you seem to respond better to the way HE was taught

• So tbh its easier to teach you

• 'okay, now I want you to beat the shot out if that wall,'

'Okay lmao bet'

• Midoriya is like, hey mayhaps we should analyze the situation

• N ur like noe

• You just don't give a fuck

• about anything really

• other than moving up the ranks

• But even then- its not a super super big deal, you're just gonna do your best but you aren't gonna stress

• However he noticed a pattern w you (even before Midoryia brought it up to him)

• You don't let anyone in

• Midoryia knows a bit more than the other students but that's really only because he's always with you

• a good majority of the week he's w you

• but its not really a deep connection

• you don't rely on either of them

• You do your best to do things on your own.

• He knows midoryias life story

• he knows why he acts the way he does

• but he doesn't know why you do

• he has a gut feeling it could be the same as midoryia

• I mean he already had one kid who's dad dipped

• he'll surely be able to figure out you too??

• So he makes himself a promise that he'll figure it out and he'll become someone you trust

• And he does just that

• When you tell him about your nightmare of a family history he's like mm, makes sense

• but he's happy that you trust him!!!

• He's a BIG suckered for movie nights

• he's got popcorn, snacks, candy, chocolate, soda- he's prepared

• list of movies lined out all ready

• I lowkey feel like he'd be into lord of the rings or fast n furious

• fast n furious at LEAST

• He's really into American action movies

• and he has no problem sharing those movies with you

• he doesn't have a whole ton of money, like he's not rich, but if you or midoryia need something he's definitely there to get it for you

• even if ur like fam no you don't need too

• he'll buy yell food a lot

• a l o t

• and cards

• when you and midoryia get him a father's day card he thinks he's gonna cry

• You guys also have a group chat

• 'da faemilee'

• Y: "Hey dad do you have milk?"

A: "???? Do I have milk????"

Y: "ya I'm looking in your fridge n ion see any???"

A: "How'd you even get in????"

Y: "Izuku."

I: "lmaoo"

Or

Y: Izuku you dumb bitch I left for ONE day

Y: And you got into a fight with Bakugou

I: He wanted to throw hands. I just did what you would do.

A: He's got you there

Or

A: What do you guys want for dinner

I: Sushi

Y: Chicfila

Y: Izu square up

I: K

Or

Y: Izu is fighting kacchow again

A: Beat his ass young midoriya

Y: Lmaoooooo

[recurring-polynya]

For Stuff For Renji's Birthday Prompts: 1) time travel turn back the clock nonsense, bc I'm an enabler and Karakura teens plus shithead Renruki teens has *Byakuya voice* strong comedic potential OR 2) Hisana lives but due to wacky circumstances, nobody notices Rukia's existence at the Academy... until they've graduated and Renruki have joined Squad 11. Dealer's choice! (Honestly whichever you pick, I might try writing the one you don't. I am not a writer these 2 just live in my head rent free)

Why would you make me choose between these, whyyyyyyyyyy?

To be honest, I almost did them both, but this was the second one I did, and I figured that I should probably do some other people’s prompts, and then I ran out of time. I might do you some time travel shenanigans later. (This should in no way stop you from writing these, I would flip my chips if you wrote something, let alone something based on my horrible ideas)

In any case, I couldn’t resist the second options and I have spun it out into a delightful bit of Byakuya-torture. Please enjoy!!!

Special thanks to @kaicko for helping me come up with the clerical error, because you all know me, I can’t just say “a clerical error.” 😂

Read on ao3 or ff.net

💀   💀   💀  

“How is the tea?” Aizen Sousuke asked smoothly.

The tea was excellent, but Byakuya wasn’t in the mood for Aizen’s needy attempts to ingratiate himself. “Adequate,” he replied dryly. “You said you had something to discuss with me.”

“Ah, diligent as always, Byakuya,” Aizen sighed, “always eager to get back to work. I’ll get to the point: I happened to speak with your wife recently at a fundraising event. She’s very interested in the people of the deep Rukon, and said she travels to South Rukongai frequently.”

Byakuya narrowed his eyes. “What is your point?”

“Well, I thought it was a bit of a strange occupation for a woman of your wife’s noble standing, but then Gin reminded me that she was actually from there herself, that there had been a bit of a to-do when you two married. I don’t tend to follow gossip myself--”

“I repeat, what is your point?” Byakuya gritted your teeth.

Aizen made a pissy little throat clearing noise and fiddled with a folder on his desk. “The fact is, Byakuya, your wife reminds me a great deal of a young woman who served in my squad a few years ago, whom I recalled also hailing from the Rukon. I wondered if there might be a.... connection.”

Byakuya’s shoulders stiffened. Impossible. He had put watches on all immigrants to the Seireitei. He would have reviewed anyone who came from the South 78th.

“Inuzuri Rukia,” Aizen read from his file, and Byakuya’s blood ran cold. “Shin’ou class of 2066. Unseated. Petite, like your wife. Dark hair. Very striking eyes. Unfortunately, an unremarkable shinigami. Potential for a good kidou user, but didn’t take direction well. More interested in sword combat, although she had little aptitude for it. Ah, here it is. Hometown: District 48, South Rukongai.”

“That doesn’t make sense,” Byakuya said flatly. “Inuzuri is the 78th district of South Rukongai. Why would she carry a surname from a different district?”

Aizen made an exaggerated frown. “Very strange! A clerical error perhaps? Hold on a moment.” He stuck his head out of his office door and said something to the shinigami on reception duty. “Fortunately, there’s an easy way to clear this up. It’ll just be a minute.”

Byakuya gripped his teacup, unsure of how to feel. A clerical error. Class of 2066… she would have enrolled in 2060, in the middle of Hisana’s worst turn, when she had been bedridden for nearly four years. Their attention would have lapsed. It made sense.

“She does not sound like your usual recruit,” Byakuya accused. Aizen was constantly finding ways to skim the highest performers from the Academy, all the gifted children.

Aizen looked sheepish. “Ah, well, you see, there was a young man of some talent that I was eager to recruit who was… attached to her. I thought she might have some potential if properly guided, but it never panned out.”

Aizen’s good deed was suddenly beginning to make sense. The girl had transferred out and taken Aizen’s prize with her. He wanted Byakuya to go fetch her away in hopes that the talented one would come home. Byakuya actually felt much better now that he’d identified Aizen’s ulterior motive, and further, that it had more to do with his own petty recruiting schemes than Byakuya’s family (specifically, Byakuya’s wife).

There was a knock at the office door, and upon being bid entry, a young woman walked in. Although indeed petite and dark-haired, she looked nothing like Hisana, and Byakuya remarked as much.

“Oh, no, this is my Seventh Seat!” Aizen chuckled. “Miss Hinamori, you were friends with Inuzuri Rukia, isn’t that correct?”

The young woman’s eyes had gone wide when she recognized Byakuya. “Er, yes, sir,” she said, her eyes darting between the two captains. “We shared a room while she served here.”

“Do you happen to remember what district she was from?” Aizen asked in an overly friendly manner.

“Oh, sure, it was South 78,” Hinamori replied. “Inuzuri, of course.”

“I’m afraid I don’t know all the outermost ones,” Aizen said in his goofy voice again. “Her paperwork says 48.”

Hinamori’s brow furrowed for a moment and then her face brightened. “She and Abarai had very heavy accents when they first came to the Academy, and used a lot of deep Rukongai language quirks. I don’t remember all of it, but they both used to use ‘shichi’ instead of ‘nana’ for seven, especially when referring to their district. They weren’t very fond of their home district. I wonder if the registrar misheard.”

“Well, there you go!” Aizen said, slapping his hands on his desk. “A very logical explanation!”

Hinamori beamed.

Byakuya found Aizen’s need to be liked by his subordinates very unprofessional and off-putting, but he tried to push it aside. He was trying not to be too eager, but this was probably the best lead he’d had on Hisana’s sister in all the years they had been searching. “Where is she now?” he grumbled.

Aizen turned his doe eyes on his fawning subordinate once more. “I don’t suppose you still keep in touch? She couldn’t have lasted very long there, they must have transferred again?”

Hinamori made a face like she didn’t want to say the answer. “I’m afraid that Kira and I had a bit of a falling out with Abarai and Inuzuri when they left. I haven’t talked to them in a few years, although we still have some mutual friends. As far as I know, though, they’re both still at Squad Eleven. I heard they were doing fairly well there, actually.”

The room seemed to retreat around Byakuya. All he could hear was the blood pounding in his ears and the reverberations of the most horrible words he could possibly think of: Squad Eleven.

---

Byakuya knew it was poor etiquette to visit another captain’s squad when the man was out, but he absolutely could not stomach the idea of discussing the matter of his wife’s sister with the Kenpachi, so he waited until Zaraki and his miniature lieutenant were sent out to go trample half of East Rukongai before visiting.

He also knew that he probably should have said something to Hisana, but he couldn’t bring himself to get his wife’s hopes up, only to dash them, should this turn out to be nothing, like so many leads before it. So, the secret sat in his stomach, heavy and acidic, jostling with the guilt of his breach of etiquette.

“Is there someone here,” he gingerly asked one of the gentlemen on gate duty, “who takes care of administrative matters for the squad?”

The man swiveled his head, which appeared to grow directly from his torso with no need for an intervening neck, to his fellow guardsman. “What?”

The other fellow had been busy trying to remove wax from his ear with a pinky. “WHAT?” he shouted back.

“Paperwork!” Byakuya said a little louder. “Is there an office of some sort? A person who knows what’s going on?”

He supposed he could have asked for the girl, Inuzuri, directly, but he didn’t feel… ready.

“I think he wants Ayasegawa,” the neckless guard hazarded.

“WHAT?”

“I’ll be right back.”

Eventually, the burly gentleman returned. With him was a strangely elegant person with a silky curtain of hair cut severely to chin length and piercing violet eyes. “It really is you,” the lovely man said with a level of disdain that Byakuya almost had to admire. Before he had a chance to get offended, the man dipped into a respectful bow. “Welcome to the Eleventh, Captain Kuchiki. Fifth Seat Ayasegawa at your service. What in Soul Society can I possibly do for you?”

“Apologies for visiting while your captain is abroad,” Byakuya replied, not meaning a word of it.

“Oh, he’ll be very sorry to have missed you,” Ayasegawa frowned. “But I’m sure you could make it up to him later.”

Byakuya’s eye twitched. “Perhaps. I have come to enquire about a young woman whom I am told transferred to your squad three years ago.”

“Does she have a name? That might make it a little easier.”

“Inuzuri Rukia.”

Both of Ayasegawa’s eyebrows shot up, and his mouth curved into a feline grin. “Ninth Seat Inuzuri, of course!”

Byakuya blinked. “Ninth Seat? Captain Aizen told me she was middling at best.”

Ayasegawa's face suddenly went stiff. “She was not well-served at the Fifth, but she has bloomed here most beautifully. Inuzuri is my personal protege, you know.” He stared at Byakuya under hooded eyes. “What is your interest in her? Captain?”

Byakuya took a deep breath through his nose. “My wife is also from Inuzuri. She is trying to locate someone she knew there. It is possible this Rukia is that someone.”

Ayasegawa frowned. “Well, I can introduce you, if you like. I should warn you, though, Rukia doesn’t have a lot of lost love for her hometown.”

“My understanding is that there isn’t much to love about it.”

“Mmm,” Ayasegawa agreed. “Well, come along, let’s go find her.” He concentrated for a moment, clearly trying to find her reiatsu. She must be a woman of some power, after all. “Ugh! She and Abarai are at it again! Every day!”

Byakuya swallowed stiffly.

“Well come on! She’s out at the training fields, clobbering our Tenth Seat, yet again.”

Oh. That kind of “going at it.”

Ayasegawa was shaking his head. “The two of them are literally an unstoppable force and an immovable object.”

“Abarai was also at the Fifth?,” Byakuya probed cautiously. “I was told they were close.”

“Of course they’re close!” Ayasegawa scoffed. “They’re partners!” He thought for a moment. “Abarai is from the 78th as well, you know. If Rukia turns out to not be your girl, perhaps one or the other of them knew the person you’re looking for. Abarai is one of those people who just… knows everyone. He’s the personable half of the pair.”

“‘Partners’?” Byakuya echoed. “What… kind of partners?”

Ayasegawa stared back at him like he was insane. “Partners.”

This path of inquiry clearly wasn’t going to get him anywhere, but wasn’t particularly relevant, either. “I did not think kidou-type zanpakutou were permitted in the Eleventh,” Byakuya sniffed. “Aizen’s records indicated Inuzuri wields an ice-and-snow type.”

Ayasegawa gave a little shrug. “Zanpakutou classifications are arbitrary. Obviously, if she had a bunch of showy blizzard attacks like Matsumoto’s little prodigy friend, it would be a no-go. Rukia can take the blade of her sword down to sub-zero temperatures. She has a weapon-shattering attack and she doesn’t feel pain when she’s fighting. It’s fundamentally no different than a zanpakutou so massive that only the wielder can lift it, or a whip sword that’s controlled with one’s reiatsu.”

This sounded like a quibble to Byakuya, but it’s not like he had come to the Eleventh looking for sound logic.

“She’s incredibly fast, probably the fastest person in the Eleventh, although no one’s really sure what Yachiru’s top speed is,” Ayasegawa continued on. He glanced at Byakuya slyly. “I hear you are very fast.”

“You have heard correctly.”

“That’s why Abarai can’t beat her. If he could land one really hard hit on her, she’d go down, but he’s not fast enough and she’s just too agile. He’s my partner’s protege, you see, so I have to take their little scraps very personally.”

How did this man talk so much?

“What did you say your wife’s relationship was to her again?”

“I did not.”

“Ah, right. Oops, look out!” Ayasegawa abruptly dove to one side as a giant mass of shihakushou and pink hair and what might be a sword came crashing through the split rail fence surrounding the training field.

Byakuya was not in the habit of ducking, so he merely plunged the force of his reiatsu down into the earth like a piton. It was almost, but not entirely sufficient. Byakuya gritted his teeth as he was driven back, dirt piling up behind his heels as he skidded backwards.

When they finally came to a halt, Byakuya looked down at the meaty youth lying at his feet. This must be the infamous Abarai, although he certainly didn’t look like one of Aizen’s usual simpering overachievers. The first thing Byakuya observed was the eye makeup. Most shinigami applied at least a little eyeliner, on grounds of tradition, but few bothered to blacken the entire eye socket, as in the skeletal facepaint of old. The second thing Byakuya noticed were the tattoos painted across his forehead and neck. They were black and spikey and horrible. The third thing was the hair, which was bright pink and spikey, and utterly at odds with the makeup and tattoos. The fourth thing was the big, sheepish grin, which honestly just tied the whole hideous tableau together.

Byakuya glared down at the lout, and in a moment of pettiness, flared his reiatsu to a level that should have sent blood spurting out of his ears.

“I’m afraid that’s not going to do much to someone who has a weekly sparring slot with the Kenpachi,” Ayasegawa commented dryly.

“Sorry ‘bout that!” the lummox cheerfully apologized as he sat up and brushed himself off. He had an Inuzuri accent so thick you could spread it on toast, an accent that Hisana tended to slip into only when she was extremely bent out of shape. Abarai snapped the sword hilt in his hand, and the tangled pile of steel on the ground neatly retracted into something that looked a little more like a weapon, if a weapon were designed by a creative and overly violent child.

“That’s a captain, you buffoon!” another voice rang out, and every muscle in Byakuya’s body locked. “Show your respects!”

The voice clearly affected Abarai as well, because he leapt to his feet, spun, and slammed into a bow. “My apologies, Captain…” his eyes glanced up and abruptly widened, “Kuchiki.”

“Greetings, Captain Kuchiki! Welcome to the Eleventh Division! I apologize very profusely for throwing Tenth Seat Abarai at you!” A second young person had come to join Abarai in his bow, and they both rose in unison, Abarai looking suddenly pale and nervous, his companion looking calm and confident.

So this was Inuzuri Rukia. She had Hisana’s voice. She had Hisana’s stature, and standing next to Abarai made her look positively childlike. She wore the same dreadful eyeblack, but the eyes that shone out of it were a variation on Hisana’s, harder and three shades more purple. The rest of the face was Hisana’s. Her hair was dark, shaved on the sides, arranged into porcupine spikes on top, although one lock hung down stubbornly between her eyes. Her ears glittered with silver piercings. At least she was free of awful tatt-- wait, no. Byakuya had missed them at first, because they were white. Abarai’s tattoos were spiky and sharp, but Inuzuri’s were graceful swirls, like ribbons wrapping lazily down her forearms. Even her reiatsu was like Hisana’s-- but instead of a cool, refreshing wintergreen, Inuzuri’s was the bone-deep cold of winter, a cold so harsh it burnt in the lungs.

There was no doubt.

This atrocious delinquent was his long-lost sister-in-law.

“Can we help you with something, sir?” Inuzuri prompted. “Abarai here’s a big fan of yours.”

“Shut up, Rukia,” Abarai managed through gritted molars.

“Inuzuri Rukia, you died as an infant thirty-six years ago and were sent to the 78th District of South Rukongai, is that correct?” Byakuya said stiffly.

Inuzuri and Abarai both bristled, a pair of mongrels raising their haunches. “That seems about right,” Inuzuri replied slowly. “My early years are a little hazy.”

“My wife, Hisana also died thirty-six years ago and was sent to Inuzuri with her infant sister,” Byakuya went on. “They were separated. My wife has been looking for her sister ever since. You… resemble her greatly.” Byakuya let the implication hang in the air. He couldn’t bring himself to say it.

There was silence for a moment. Then there was the distinct noise of a laugh that, having been held in, had escaped through someone’s nose. “Sorry! Pardon me!” Ayasegawa wheezed, clapping one hand over his mouth and looking away. “Bit of. Dust. In my throat.”

“I told you! I told you, you looked like that picture of her in the Bulletin!” Abarai was hissing.

“I thought you were lying because you thought she was pretty!” Inuzuri hissed back.

“I thought she was pretty because she looks just like you!”

“Now is really not the time, Abarai!” She cleared her throat and tried to stand up a bit taller, a futile effort. “So, uh, so what? What does that mean, if I am her sister? Does that… does that make me noble?”

A higher pitched wheezing came out of Ayasegawa. The level of impudence was extraordinary.

“I would like you to come to my home to meet her, first,” Byakuya put off making any promises. “We can discuss what comes next. As a family.”

“I’m at work right now,” Inuzuri excused.

“Inuzuri, I need to know how this pans out, you can have the afternoon off,” Ayasegawa informed her.

Inuzuri’s confidence seemed to be draining out of her. She took a tiny step closer to Abarai and groped for his hand. “I’m bringing Renji,” she declared.

“Is he compulsory?” Byakuya asked. Inuzuri was absurd looking too, but at least she was small.

“He’s my family,” Inuzuri insisted.

Byakuya’s brows furrowed. This could prove problematic. “In any sort of legally binding sense?”

“We’re engaged!” Inuzuri announced.

“We are?” Abarai goggled.

“I told you I’d marry you if you could ever manage to beat me in a fight! What else would you call that?” Rukia hissed at him in a voice that was still, unfortunately, perfectly audible.

“I’ve been trying every day, and honestly, Rukia, it’s not looking good for me!”

“Can you just go with it for once, instead of arguing with me every time?”

“If you want to leave and never tell anyone you found her,” Ayasegawa put in, “I am very bribable.”

Byakuya was sorely tempted.

---

End note: To further explain the number mix-up, as I understand it “seven” in Japanese can either be said as “nana” or “shichi”. People usually say “nana” for two reasons-- 1) to avoid confusion with 4 (”shi”, although you can also say “yon”) and because “shi” is a homophone for death. Given how shitty the districts in the 70s are, I rather liked the idea that they residents use the “shichi” pronunciation as a bit of gallows humor. (And if you don’t have a rude nickname for the town you grew up in, well, congrats for not growing up somewhere shitty)

I don’t actually speak Japanese, tho, so forgive me if this is all nonsense. 😁

[bpdanakins]

i just infodumped to my friends about bpd anakin and i have No Regrets snakjdkajfsk

anyway, doth thee have any more bpd anakin (or just anakin in general) headcanons becuase i am living for this

I am So Sorry this took so long, but hopefully the length makes up for it. Thank you so much for sending this to me bc BPD!Anakin is my entire life. I could talk about it all day, every day.

I’d like to thank @apple-grass-and-smiles for helping me organize my Thoughts on all of this, prompting me to focus on certain things and giving me feedback in general too. 

Okay, here goes:

Anakin fidgets!! I’m not even sure if this is a headcanon but if it is I will die on this hill. He can’t stay still for the life of him and doubly so when he’s anxious, nervous or Ready To Do Something Already. 

We know Anakin can’t hold eye contact to save his life when he’s upset or insecure, but I can also see him having issues with touch when he’s upset, unless it’s from certain people only (Padmé always gets a pass, for example).

Anakin’s quick to let some small stuff go, but larger things people do that hurt him (whether intentionally or not) aren’t really ever forgotten, and he just kind of takes that in and suppresses it, until random moments when it pops up, he remembers, and it just hurts like it’s happening all over again. The people around him often have no idea what fully sets him off, bc to them, his reaction now seems out of nowhere while his mind’s still stuck on this other thing.     - His reactions also seem sometimes like they’re Over The Top, but even just remembering past hurts can feel almost disabling at times. It’s worse when he ends up ruminating on it, because the hurt and feelings of betrayal just keep building up over and over until it almost blots everything else out.

When he’s happy or surrounded by those he loves, everyone kind of can feel it too, bc he’s just fuckoff powerful in the Force and esp other Force sensitives kind of gather around his space and just… his affection and excitement are literally infectious. 

This probably runs closer to ADHD than BPD for sure, but get him talking about anything mechanical (robotics, engineering, racing, etc) and he will go from 0 to 100 so fast you’d get whiplash. No one minds though bc, as I said, his excitement is infectious and honestly those around him just adore listening to him go off even though half of it goes over their head.     - Ahsoka may not ever get Gotta Go Fast, but she definitely loves it when he really talks her ear off about all this stuff, bc it makes her excited to learn and she picks up on all of it easily. (There’s a part of her that wants to emulate him and she does def look up to him obviously.)     - We see it with Obi-Wan, but people love to use his love of all things mechanical as a way to distract him from things that upset him. It doesn’t always work but they try.

With Obi-Wan, he ends up on the side of Anakin’s splitting like, all the time. And unfortunately sometimes Obi-Wan can’t tell that Anakin’s lashing out not because of something Obi-Wan’s actually done, but bc Anakin’s young and Obi-Wan’s the figure he can project a lot of his frustrations on.     - It can lead Obi-Wan to being confused and hurt sometimes, bc he doesn’t always understand Anakin’s thought processes when this happens, and it definitely sometimes cuts him to the core. On the reverse side, though Anakin might not always say it to his face, Obi-Wan definitely can overhear him at times when Anakin’s ready to 1v1 anyone who even so much as makes a frowny face about Obi-Wan, which helps Obi-Wan remember that Anakin does love him too, actually.     - It ends up being one of the points of frisson between Anakin and Mace, bc Anakin can’t read body language perfectly, especially when it comes to feelings of abandonment or someone seemingly not loving who Anakin loves to the same degree. Mace has a drier sense of humor at times and defs has a more resting frowny face, and this rankles Anakin at times bc he can’t always tell when Mace is just chilling vs being disappointed, and while Anakin will take it all personally, he ALSO takes any perceived criticism to those he loves personally too.     - Both Mace and Obi-Wan don’t get this bc they have a perfectly fine relationship. Anakin’s just Like That.     - (And super overprotective of people’s perceptions of Obi-Wan. Anakin will go off about Obi-Wan being mean and all that, but fuck you and your entire family tree if you ever even think Obi-Wan’s anything short as the most amazing Jedi to ever Jedi.)

Everybody and their mother can see the pedestal Anakin puts Padmé on, and surprisingly she rarely is on the end of his splitting. When he does, he just internalizes it bc he can’t stand the idea that he’s somehow seen her in a wrong light, or he feels guilty for getting angry with her.     - He also defines a huge chunk of his life around loving her, making her his center for a lot of his decisions and reactions, so when they’re off, his whole world seems backwards. It makes him Really uncomfortable and unsure. He gets panicky and upset and often people have no idea what the cause is so they just end up a lil panicky in return.     - He tends to take it out on others, by doing an exercise or by disappearing to fiddle with something.     - Pads has an easier time recognizing Anakin’s emotional needs, bc in some ways they’re the same as hers. She’s good at reaching out to him, comforting him and reassuring him of her love. And in turn, he like, never fucking shuts up about how much he loves her, and those moments are what make her feel so special around him. Being loved by Anakin makes someone feel important and even get tingly, bubbly happy feelings, because it’s hard to doubt it sometimes.     - There’s a part of her that sometimes worries about how Intense he is, but, like I said, when his positive intense emotions are focused on you, it feels wonderful. And he’s genuinely super sweet and gentle, and she appreciates that, when she tells him to back off about something, he’ll listen to her wishes. (I’m using movie Anakin as my base here bc TCW!Anakin in this regard is just…. bad y’all lmao)

Anakin’s anxious about Ahsoka All The Time. He’s afraid he’s a bad teacher, he’s afraid he’ll mess her up somehow, he’s afraid he’ll hurt her or she’ll get hurt, and that’s why he can’t stand the idea sometimes of her being on her own. It’s not a lack of trust in her abilities, but because he feels responsible for her, and that’s why he’s always ready to put himself between her and literally anything that could potentially hurt her. (Even if it’s not a physical threat.)     - There are times she finds this amusing and times this makes her angry, but mostly she is long suffering. There are times she appreciates it though, bc she’s still a kid and isn’t always sure which way is up, especially when in a war. Anakin is often a cornerstone for her, and though she’d literally NEVER admit it, his overprotectiveness can sometimes be a reassurance. She knows she can handle herself just fine, but when she has an inkling of doubt, she’ll remind herself that Anakin will be there, and then go and take care of the problem herself.     - She doesn’t always get his moments where he’s not always falling over himself to talk Obi-Wan up or go out of his way to sass at him. To her, they have a wonderful relationship and she rarely notices when Obi-Wan might say something that pokes at Anakin wrong, so she often just winds up ???? when Anakin is huffy or annoyed with her grandmaster.     - She sees Anakin’s anger issues a little more easily than others, and she worries about it but always brushes it off or downplays it, bc she always sees why he’s angry, and also always just assumes (like everyone else) that he can Handle It.     - Anakin’s recklessness and impulsivity are some of her favourite things about being his padawan. He’s literally never boring to be around, and Ahsoka needs that sort of excitement to sometimes push aside the knowledge that she’s literally in a warzone. Anakin’s also really good at doing this intentionally; he’s literally always worrying after her, and all he wants to do is take care of those he loves and make them happy, so sometimes he’ll be Extra just to get under her skin or distract her and honestly this is the basis of where their playful competitions always come from.

If Ahsoka is long suffering, Rex is doubly so. Sometimes it’s all he can do to keep up with Anakin and Ahsoka, but he appreciates Anakin “thinking outside the box”. He also appreciates knowing that Anakin is just as loyal to him and his men as he himself is (well… Anakin is until he isn’t lmao)     - Rex, like Pads, is really good at picking up Anakin’s moods and even trains of thought, so he’s always able to work around that, or even see where Anakin’s mind is going when coming up with a plan. They make a really good team bc while Anakin can jump from one idea to another without them seemingly correlated, Rex immediately follows Anakin’s leaps and they just end up in sync.     - That being said, Anakin can be really confusing at times. His moods are often so all over the place, that Rex generally has no idea what tf is going on. He deals with it by learning to be calm when Anakin’s unable to, and just ride out Anakin’s worst moods until they pass by, learning not to let it all phase him. Anakin lowkey hates it when he’s upset, but once the worst of it passes, he really appreciates that Rex will just… not press like Obi-Wan, or balances out the moments Anakin’s mind is so cluttered by instead just keeping a good focus on things.

Probably everyone’s most baffling symptom of Anakin’s is his paranoia. Obi-Wan kind of sees it the most, because Anakin is always testy with the Council and often feels put on the spot, dismissed and looked down upon. To everyone else, they don’t get where Anakin’s ideas come from, bc everything seems chill on their end. His fretting about others’ well-being is straightforward enough, but his instant panic-turned-anger shift when he receives any criticism (especially the perceived type) always gives people whiplash. It’s hard to keep up with, hard to see what it was that got to him so much, and hard to know how to help (particularly when they’re worried that trying to help him will feel like “taking sides”).     - Ahsoka takes Anakin’s POV of the Council pretty easily, at least when it comes to him. This is mostly bc she’s not there when there’s a meeting or tension around them, nor was she there when Anakin first arrived, so she just assumes they must genuinely often have issues with him too. She doesn’t see it to the extent Anakin does though, but she recognizes that sometimes he seems to blow things out of proportion when he’s upset, and figures it’ll just blow over once he’s calmed down.     - Pads, on the other hand, is always kind of aware of Anakin’s fears of losing her. He often not-so-subtly looks for reassurances that she loves him and won’t leave him, that she’s feeling alright or not angry/annoyed with him. She chalks it up to his trauma with his mother (and she’s partially right), so even when sometimes it gets on her nerves that he seems to doubt her so much, she tries to remind herself of that and let it go. 

Those closest to him can pick up that Anakin tends to see the negative in things, and is generally really hard on himself. They try to help out by giving praise where it’s due and just overall Being There, but it’s Rough to know they often don’t get through. (Palps, on the other hand, knows how to weaponize this.) 

The saddest part is that I don’t think anyone once thought Anakin was Seriously Ill, partly out of ignorance, partly bc they assumed it had to do with his age/upbringing, and partly bc, eventually, everyone was dealing with trauma and even if someone wanted to send Anakin back to the Temple to have a nap or something, they legit couldn’t bc there was a war going on and he also would never have tolerated it at that point in time.     - Obi-Wan’s the one who worries about all of this the most, because he’s always felt such a huge responsibility for Anakin and loves him a lot, he’s just never fully been able to understand how to get on the same wavelength as Anakin.     - Anakin, too, actually never fully figures out that there is something Going On. Everything’s always overwhelming him and even though he prefers doing things at 100mph, sometimes it seems like there is Too Much going on, and even during peace times it just felt like he couldn’t keep up with everything. He hates internal reflection but also can’t stop overthinking about everything, and so he just ruminates and goes in circles and often just ends up going nowhere when it comes to dealing with things. He tries his hardest all the time, he is ALWAYS trying, but doing stupid stunts, fighting droids, making robots and speeding everywhere all the time is truthfully only a bandaid.     - Being surrounded by those he adores and receiving affection from them/seeing them happy boosts his mood a lot but he doesn’t have enough self-awareness to guess at why his happier moods just won’t last.     - Sometimes he can figure out when he’s being irrational and then just takes it out on himself, which only exacerbates his bad episodes. 

Palpatine doesn’t help. He’s abusive, manipulates Anakin all the time and is the Worst and definitely makes everything Anakin is struggling with harder and I think we should all just punt him into a sun thank you this isn’t a headcanon I just want everyone to know how much I hate him

[baecvlt]

First Love

Pairing: Sougami (Byakuya Togami x Kazuichi Soda)

Warnings: Smut (all wholesome tho bc they barely met in this one)

A/N: Decided to write this up for the bestie (komaedanovio on TikTok; follow them). Azul would die for them and there are 0 fics abt them sooo. Yeah.

“So you’re part of the Future Foundation, huh?”

Byakuya pushes his glasses back as they were falling off his nose, then turning around to see the person who spoke. “Uh, yes,” he answered the pink haired man behind him, he stuck out his hand that he’d covered with a handkerchief,“Byakuya Togami”. They shook hands.

“Name’s Kazuichi Soda”

“I know. The ‘Ultimate Mechanic’, is it not?”

“Yeah! You look really rich. Valentino Couture?”

“Yeah—,” Byakuya answered, then looked down at his suit,“How did you know?”. “My mom was somewhat a tailor. She’d help fix and sew up suits such as yours, so I obviously had to recognize Italian threads,” he explained,“Made sure I washed my hands before approaching you, can’t stain a fine suit like that”. Byakuya was somewhat impressed. No one has ever appreciated his attire, he looked like a snob to most people.

Then again, Kazuichi isn’t most people.

“She taught me to sew, never let me handle suits,” Kazuichi added,“But I’d always see them in the closet hung up nicely”. He had a warm smile on his face, reminiscing tends to bring a little joy to him. “I think that’s just honorable,” Byakuya said warmly. “You think so?”. Byakuya nodded, the smile on Kazuichi’s face spreading. “Thanks,” he mumbled, but spoke up,“We should keep in touch, y’know?”. Byakuya began to think. He wasn’t really one for friends, Kazuichi was extremely beneath him. On the other hand, he was interesting to talk to and didn’t seem like a pest, right?

“That’s fine”

“Alright! How about we meet up during the island celebration? Tonight?”

Byakuya nodded, he didn’t know why, but he nodded. “Cool! See you later, Togami”. Kazuichi ran off, going to see if he can help with cleanup someway. As he ran, Byakuya had just realized he agreed to hang out with someone who he had just met. There wasn’t anything wrong with that, but it was just weird to him. I guess, he just seemed nice enough. Whatever. Now that the Tragedy is over, it’d be nice to return things to normal. Byakuya was ready to make new partnerships and if his first besides his classmates was to be Kazuichi, so be it.

Later that evening, Byakuya made sure to attend. He got there early, making it easier to spot Kazuichi. He was around Gundham and Sonia, who had begun warming up to him. Their eyes locked, Byakuya waved. Kazuichi waved back as he called for him,“Togami! Wait up—”. He ran from his two classmates and to Byakuya. Everyone had gotten dressed up, Kazuichi in a nice little suit that complimented his hair. He had glasses on this time. “What a surprise!,” he cheered,“I thought you would’ve bailed!”. That was sad to say the least. “How could I do such a thing? I had to come anyway,” Byakuya explained,“Makoto can’t drive...he’s also in the Future Foundation”.

“So I’ve heard. Can I offer you a drink?”

“Why not?”

Byakuya was a pessimist, this we know. He was as pessimistic as they come. Hanging out with Kazuichi was something he told himself wouldn’t be worth his time, but he agreed, so he had to suck it up. To his surprise, hanging out with him wasn’t so bad. In fact, he’ll never admit it, but Byakuya actually enjoyed Kazuichi’s company. They went for a glass of punch, enjoyed the feast, danced with friends till dawn. Around 4am (because damn, this party was just never gonna end), they took it upon themselves to walk along the beach. As they walked, conversations took place. Byakuya went off on a rant about his limousine life, riding in one everyday and how he feared for his life when doing so. His limo made a sound that sounded as if it were going to fall apart any time soon.

“It was a scratching noise against the asphalt and absolutely terrorized me as a child. To this day, I won’t enter a limousine. I just can’t”

“Scratching? Gee, only thing that comes to mind is the exhaust coming down. Wish I could’ve seen it and told you for sure”

“I still have it in a hidden garage. It’s that valuable”

“Oh, nice! Maybe, I can stop by and see what’s wrong. You’ll have to drive it though”

Byakuya raised a brow. “You’re the mechanic, are you not?,” he asked. Kazuichi laughed nervously, nodding. “See, thing is...I get terribly carsick”. Well, that was new. It was confusing to Byakuya, just as the confusion hit, Kazuichi added:

“Isn’t that funny? The rich guy who’s scared of limos and the mechanic with carsickness”

Byakuya snickered,“Yeah, I guess that’s unheard of”.

They laughed, finding a perfect place to sit down. It was late. Dark and late, the sand was cool against their hands. They took off their shoes, setting them aside. The waves crashes on the shore, “So, what next?,” Kazuichi asked. His voice was softer, Byakuya took notice. “What do you mean?,” he asked. Kazuichi pushed back his hair and shrugged. “I mean, now that we’re all free”. Byakuya took time to give a proper answer, he had a plan.

“Well, for starters, after we finish cleanup, do the very best to rebuild homes. Slowly as we become civilized again, I rebuild the Togami Conglomerate. It’s what my family would’ve wanted and for them, I’d do just about anything” “Wow” “And yourself?”

Kazuichi smiled, facing him. “I’ve been working on blueprints here and there to, get this, introduce new transportation for us all!”. Byakuya shrugged. “You haven’t heard the best part, though,” he added,“You’ll never guess what it is!”.

“Flying car?

“That sounds awesome— No! That’s not it at all!”

“What is it?”

Kazuichi bit back his smile and answered,“A monorail! One that goes super fast! I just know it’s possible! Average monorail? 70 miles per hour, but if I get it right, It could go 200 miles per hour...ore more!”. Now, Byakuya was smiling. “Impressive,” he responded,“It’d be very convenient for people to get around”.

“I’m glad you think so”

Kazuichi faced the ocean, sighing deeply. “I’ve just always wanted to build transportation, really fast ones,” he said,“My old man doubted me, though. He didn’t think it was realistic. He said cars I can do, but never anything past that. Something about cars is all the family knows, I dunno”.

“I think you can do it”

“You’re just saying things—”

“No, I know you can. You have something other geniuses lack. You have the heart. Where there’s heart, there is will”

“That means a lot coming from you”

“Why from me?”

Kazuichi explained that he knows about Byakuya’s family and they didn’t sound any easier, either. “We didn’t have good upbringings,” he said,“But you, you had it so hard. Yet, you overcame all of that shit. If you survived that and all of this, I know you can rebuild your conga line”

“Conglomerate?”

“Yeah, that”

They smiled. “Man to man,” Kazuichi added,“Is settling down in that plan?”. Byakuya hadn’t thought of that at all. Would he even want to settle down? Jesus. That was the last thing he expected to think about. “I’m going to be completely honest with you,” Byakuya answered,“I have no idea. That isn’t something that’s come to mind. While I’d like to have someone to continue my legacy, I just don’t know. Tell me about your plan?”. Kazuichi was confused now, he didn’t think Byakuya was gonna return the question. “I would like to, but who’d love me?,” he muttered. He continued.

“I never had the best luck with women, but then sometimes, I sit and wonder,’Do I really feel this way about women?’ I try to be such a people pleaser, I sometimes don’t even know if I genuinely like something or if I say I do because that’s what’s expected of me and I’ve never told anyone else that, wow”

Byakuya sucked at being comforting, we also know this, but he really wanted to be there for Kazuichi. “I think I’m gay,” Kazuichi blurted, covering his mouth. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that”. Byakuya shook his head,“First of all, congratulations”. Kazuichi couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Second of all, don’t apologize for being truthful to yourself,” he said,“I’m not exactly of heterosexual persuasion either”.

“Oh, thank god. I though I was going to be killed and thrown into the ocean”

“Nah, because who on this island is straight? Absolutely no one”

“You might be right...wow. I’m gay. I’m gay. I’m gaaaayyy”

Byakuya laughed,“Let it out, I guess”. “I’ve just never said that out loud! It feels so freeing!”. Kazuichi stood up and ran to the ocean. At the top of his lungs, he professed his attraction to men. He ran back, only for them to hear someone say. “You love who you love, man, more power to ya!”. They laughed at that moment, laughed so hard their stomach cramped. “Who even was that?,” Kazuichi sobbed.

“I think that might’ve been Yasuhiro”

“O-Oh, at least you know him”

They calmed down, enjoying their time on the sand. “This was fun,” Kazuichi mumbled. “I agree”. He scoot closer to Byakuya, who unknowingly wrapped his arm around his waist. He caressed his sides, softly. Kazuichi lay his head on Byakuya’s shoulder, which he didn’t mind. There was just something really comforting about this. “What’s most important to you in a relationship?,” Kazuichi asked. His voice was still soft, but unlike before, it wasn’t stern or blue. “For both of us to have ambition and goals set,” he answered,“What’s important to you?”.

“I just wanna trust someone. It’s hard for me to trust anyone, really. So as long as I can trust them and they’re kind, that’s all I want”

“Well, I’m a brutally honest cunt”

“I love brutally honest cunts”

He laughed as he continued to rub down his sides. As the saying goes, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. Plus, tonight was going just great. “Look at me,” Byakuya said. “Hm?”. Kazuichi faced him, only to be grabbed and pulled to Byakuya’s lips. He gasped, a blush coming across his face as Byakuya kissed him ever so tenderly. They pulled away slowly. Kazuichi covered his face, Byakuya reaching for his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he muttered. “No! Its okay!,” he blurted,“It was more than okay! I-I’ve just never kissed another dude before. Okay, I’ve never actually kissed anyone else”.

“Oh?”

“Well, I have, but not like this”

“I can tell. Your lips, they were so soft and inexperienced. Untouched, I’d say”

As Byakuya said this, he placed his thumb gently on Kazuichi’s lips, sliding it down soft and slowly; he shuddered before he spoke. “I want you to kiss me again,” he muttered against his sliding thumb. “Good”. Kazuichi’s breath hitched as Byakuya grabbed his jaw, gently kissed him. He kissed back now with more readiness, his hand digging into the sand. Byakuya’s hand moved from his jaw to his throat, gripping softly. A sweet moan escaped Kazuichi’s lips, making him bite Byakuya’s bottom lip. He winced, pulling away momentarily. “Sorry,” he whispered. Byakuya reassured him it was okay, but Kazuichi shook his head. “Let me kiss it better,” he cooed, pushing Togami on his back. Soda straddled him, pecking his lower lip.

Now, Byakuya was blushing.

“Ah, don’t hate me, but I kinda drew blood”

“You? Withdraw blood? With those teeth? Also unheard of”

“Hey! Shut up about my teeth”

“I like your teeth”

“I like you”

“Really? Prove yourself truthful”

“Say less”

“WHAT THE FUCK”

Soda quickly got off of Togami, who sat up just as fast. There stood Hiyoko, Mahiru, Ibuki, and Mikan. “Hey girls!,” Kazuichi waved,“Togami was just helping me find my glasses. We found them know, so there’s no need to worry”. “Oh don’t worry, we were just on our way to the cabins,” Mahiru explained. “What goes on in the cabins stays in the cabins! Wooho- ouch!”. Hiyoko acting as if she didn’t just nudge the fuck out of Ibuki. “Y-You know, if you two are going to, uhm, continue what you were d-doing here,” Mikan began to suggest,“Maybe you c-could go get a cabin too. The others are headed over here”. Kazuichi looked at Byakuya, who nodded. “Okay then! Let’s go!”.

So there they were, following the girls to the cabins. “I say we go to mine, just to be safe,” Kazuichi explained,“Besides, I got to clean up. It looks greats now”. Byakuya just nodded, he couldn’t utter a word. For some reason, his heart was pounding out of his chest. The girl’s split from them, giggling as they entered their room. “Home sweet home,” Kazuichi said as he opened the door. They stepped in, Kazuichi locking it. He had turned the lights on, but once he jumped on his bed, Byakuya turned them off. “Oh, you’re straight to the point, aren’t you?,” Kazuichi teased as he held his arms open for Byakuya to crawl in. He did just that, kissing him all over. He focused on his lips for about 30 seconds, before moving on to his neck, and finally he unbuttoned his shirt a little to kiss along his chest. Feeling his shirt unbutton, Kazuichi took it upon himself to do the same to Byakuya, except unbuttoning it all.

“Togami..

“Yeah?”

“Lay down”

“Alright”

Byakuya lay down as Kazuichi got between his legs, hands on his belt buckle. “Can I...?”. Byakuya nodded, giving Kazuichi permission to take it off. Carefully, he slid off his jeans and briefs, exposing his pale cock. At that point, it was quite obvious that Kazuichi had no idea as to what he was doing and supposed to do. He began by grabbing his cock, licking at his tip a little, stroking him. Byakuya snickered as Kazuichi’s eyes met his, but breathed deeply. He put his mouth over it, bobbing his head, accidentally hitting his throat. He gagged, but not loudly. Byakuya played with his hair, not yet grabbing it. “Take your time,” he comforted,“I want you to enjoy this as much as I am...Fuck~ you’re doing so well”.

Kazuichi was really, really struggling. He had to think back to the most realistic porno he’s ever seen. What were these people doing that he hasn’t? Try being sloppy maybe? Cursing himself for his lack of education in gay sex (well, actually, just sex in general), he worked with what he knew. The last thing he wanted was to embarrass himself. Little did he know, he was actually putting Byakuya on edge. Byakuya hardly cursed and when he did, it was for good reason. Like right now, Kazuichi was giving him the sloppiest head in that moment. He was doing so well, Byakuya became fixated his mouth. Something about his mouth drove him insane.

And then there was Kazuichi, still believing he was doing terrible. His thoughts were racing.

I know I’m doing something wrong...

Is he even enjoying it?

God, I’m so out of his league...

Maybe if I just spit...

What would my dad think of this? Wait, my dad’s dead—

Kazuichi allowed himself to drool all over his cock. Byakuya moaned, pushing his head back. “No more, I’m so close...,” he gasped,“I’d prefer to finish elsewhere...”. Kazuichi’s stomach sank. “O-Oh,” he stuttered,“Okay, I guess I’ll just lay down”. Byakuya got in between his legs now, removing his jeans amd boxers, examining him, realizing he’d look better completely nude. Kazuichi shivered, which he also took note of. “Let me pull a bedsheet over us,” he said,“You look cold”. “Thank you,” Kazuichi muttered as Byakuya fumbled for the covers.

“Better?”

“Still a little chilly”

“Okay, Uhm- how about now?”

Byakuya held Kazuichi with his arms wrapped around him, bare chests making contact. “Feels so nice,” he mumbled. Byakuya placed a kiss on his chest before warning him about prep.

“Please be gentle”

“I will be, just relax. Breathe”

Kazuichi was shaking at this point, he was so nervous and didn’t know why. Byakuya held him tightly, stopping himself from entering even a finger in the guy. “You’re shaking,” he noted,“Is everything okay?”. Kazuichi nodded, explaining,“This is my first time, I just want you to be gentle”. Byakuya helped him work on his breathing. He placed a warm hand on his chest, making sure his heart rate slows down. “There,” he whispered,“I’m gonna go slow”. Kazuichi nodded, bracing himself.

Prep wasn’t actually bad?

He took Byakuya’s first two fingers well, but then the third one made him whine (and cry a little). Nonetheless, he just wanted to get it over with. The pain had gone away once Byakuya had curled his fingers a few times. Kazuichi made small noises as he took his fingers, whining when pulled out. With his other hand, he cupped Kazuichi’s jaw, but slowly slit it down to his throat. Kazuichi gasped as he felt Byakuya’s grip tighten. “I’m going to ruin you ever so softly,” he whispered,“Understood?”.

“Yes...”

“Good”

Byakuya took his cock out, placing Kazuichi’s legs on his shoulders. Still tight, he groaned as he pushed in. “Ah! Fuck...”. Along with being filled by Byakuya’s cock, the grip on his throat remained, sending a wave of pleasure through him. Byakuya kept his thrusts slow, just like be promised. “I-Is this okay?,” Byakuya managed.

“Harder”

“I just started. D-Don’t you want to ease into it first”

“No, just— please. Also...”

Kazuichi moved his hand to Byakuya’s choking hand, pressing it down harder against him. “What you’re asking for could hurt you, um...Are you sure?,” Byakuya asked. Kazuichi nodded, fisting Byakuya’s hair and pulling him in for a heated kiss. In response, Byakuya only thrust harder into him. He knew he wouldn’t last long, seeing Kazuichi’s already fucked out face. Each thrust only made his blush deepen and his stomach acids find new ways to make him feel sick. Byakuya came to the realization that his cock already had the guy in shambles and in a trance, almost. He was making him feel good, but he knew that he wasn’t exactly fucking him the way he should be fucked, deserves to be fucked. He wasn’t hitting his sweet spot just right, Byakuya taking it upon himself to experiment with his thrusts.

“Ngh! Hey, why’d you stop doing that? It felt— Ah!”

Found it.

Byakuya tried thrusting with his cock in that angle, but realized it was harder in this position. “Ass up,” he sighed, slightly out of breath. Kazuichi didn’t hesitate whatsoever, immediately laying on his stomach with his ass in the air. Sure, he already felt weak in his knees, but that wouldn’t stop him from letting Byakuya do him the way he was about to.

It didn’t take long for Byakuya to rediscover this new spot, hitting it repeatedly. Kazuichi dug his face into the soft, white pillows; practically screaming as he was unraveling underneath Byakuya. His whines were perpetual and if you listened closely, you could hear exactly what he was saying in a quiet breath.

“Yesyesyes, oh! Please don’t stop now pleasepleaseplease I can’t take it anymore, Ah! I love you, I love you so much, I really love you, o-oh thank you..”

Byakuya smiled at his low, yet raspy words. I love you? “How cute,” he muttered, pulling his messy pink hair back. Kazuichi’s hand shook as he moved it too his leaking cock. “I’m close, Togami, please don’t stop”. Byakuya snickered,“I don’t plan on it”. Gently, he shoved his head back down onto the pillow, also nearing his high. Without warning, Byakuya came after a few thrusts. Feeling his warmth, Kazuichi came right after. He collapsed onto the mattress, head in the pillows and trying his very best to catch his breath. As he took deep breaths, Byakuya smiled as his fingers walked up the blushing boy’s back, tracing small circles and figure eights.

“You’re too kind”

“You deserve it,” Byakuya whispered, placing a hand on Kazuichi’s hip and kissing up and down his back (and to his neck). Kazuichi turned around, Byakuya getting to kiss his stomach a few times before being pulled up by Kazuichi. “Ah!”. He laughed as he held Byakuya tighter, nuzzling him. Byakuya may have been taller, but Kazuichi was definitely stronger.

“Gotcha”

Byakuya would be annoyed, but not when Kazuichi has the goofiest and most smug look on his face. Eventually he let him go, laying by him. Kazuichi’s hair was ruined by their little night Basically, he ended up with his tiny braid undone. Kazuichi twirled his excess hair in between his fingers. “Oh- Allow me,” Byakuya said, finding the rubber band used to fasten the hair, braiding. Kazuichi’s eyes stared at him lovingly, watching Byakuya put his glasses back on just to redo his braid. “Annnnnd...done”. Byakuya rubbed his chest before reaching for the the ground and picking up his briefs, putting them back on. He tossed Kazuichi his boxers.

“Thanks”

“Of course”

They lay next to each other, Kazuichi playing with Byakuya’s hair. “I’m so glad I met you,” Byakuya admitted. “Ditto”. Byakuya grabbed his chin, pulling him in for a slow, passionate kiss. Suddenly, the door creaked open, but two girls rush in, already fondling each other.

“Excited, aren’t you?”

“Why wouldn’t I be when you look so—”

Kazuichi and Byakuya stared at the two women, who awkwardly stared back.

“Togami?”

“Fukawa?...WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH NAEGI’S SISTER?”

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THE MECHANIC?”

“I won’t say anything if you don’t”

“Sounds good to me! Come on, Komaru”

The girls ran out, thus allowing Kazuichi and Byakuya to finish their little makeout session. Eventually, it tired them out, sleeping in each other’s arms. Before sleep, Byakuya wondered something, but decided it could wait. The next morning, Kazuichi woke up first, planting a small kiss on Byakuya’s lips. As his eyes fluttered open, Kazuichi gasped. “My prince has finally awoken”.

“Silly”

“I know”

Byakuya kissed him properly, getting up to bathe. Upon entering the shower, he heard the door open. “Can I join?!”. Byakuya invited him in, closing the shower door. “Did you want something before we go?,” Byakuya asked, making Kazuichi blush. “Uh, no, um...did you?”. Byakuya shook his head.

“I just wanted to shower with you”

“I see. Help me with my hair, I’ll help you with yours”

Kazuichi nodded, grabbing the shampoo and lathering it into his hair. It didn’t take long to add in the conditioner in too since his hair was short. Now, Byakuya got to Kazuichi’s hair. He took care of Kazuichi, being less awkward about washing him up. It’s not that Kazuichi wasn’t into helping him, he was insecure about touching him. He wanted to do it right, sometimes doubting himself and what he was doing. Byakuya on the other hand, was confident in what he was doing as he massaged Kazuichi’s scalp whilst washing him. “Did you mean it?”.

“Mean what?”

“Last night while I was destroying you from the inside out—”

“Of course”

“—you said you loved me....well, did you mean it? I know people say things they don’t mean in a state of bliss, but-”

“Togami, I meant every word”

Byakuya’s heart skipped a beat as Kazuichi spoke. “If you mean it, tell me right now that you love me,” he ordered. “I love you, Togami. Do you love me?”. Byakuya held onto him, hugging him tightly. “Well, I guess this is my answer,” Kazuichi laughed,“Hey— Are you crying?”. Obviously crying, (because he was emotional for some reason) Byakuya backed away.

“Of course not! Me? Crying? No, never!”

“I love you”

“I love you too”

“Was this too fast?”

“What? You’re telling me you don’t believe in love at first sight?”

“I guess I do”

They finished up their shower and got dressed, heading out. Everyone had already met up at the dock. “Jesus, where the hell were you two?!,” Makoto asked, genuinely concerned. “Yeah, we were about to go search,” Hajime added. “I was helping Kazuichi pack something. I saw him struggle in his room with it,” Byakuya said, calmly. Kazuichi just went along with it. “Yeah, my tools wouldn’t pack well,” he explained,“Togami was just helping me stuff everything into my toolbox”. A low mutter was heard, but you’d have to be close enough to understand it.

“Yeah, right. That toolbox wasn’t the only thing Byakuya was stuffing...—”

“FUKAWA!”

“Alright! That does it for the headcount!,” Makoto announced,“Let’s get going. We have a rebuilt city to settle into!”. As everyone cheered on boarded the boat with their own individual classes, Byakuya rushed closer to Kazuichi. “Will I see you again?,” Kazuichi asked.

“Soon. May I kiss you goodbye, or would that be too much a cliche?”

“Yeah, but I love cliches. All the best movies have ‘em”

“So do I”

They kissed tenderly, Byakuya holding his waist. They pulled away, smiling. “See ya around,” Kazuichi mumbled. “Goodbye, Souda”.

[zontiky]

okay so i tried to save this ask as a draft and it got deleted because tumblr is just such a functional website like that <3 but the prompt was “the hargreeves as ghosts in the apocalypse with five” or something like that i’m going to scream

this is SUPER long so i’m putting it under the cut hfkjsd

pre-five: the hargreeves siblings are dead. wait i feel a drabble coming on ooh

The Hargreeves siblings are dead.

Ben isn’t very aware of this at first. He’s been dead since 2006 -- he’s quite used to it, by now. What he is aware of, first, is light. Blinding white light. And Vanya, in the middle of it. He doesn’t close his eyes because he can’t feel pain, but if he could he thinks she would have made him blind. There’s light, and heat, and power, and then he closes his eyes anyway because the ceiling is collapsing around him and it’s instinctual.

When he opens them again he sees ash. Ash -- and Klaus.

He’s gotten used to Klaus, too. Klaus has a memorable sort of face; even if he didn’t, Ben has seen it every single day for almost twenty years. He doesn’t know if it’s actually been twenty years, for him. He doesn’t know how time moves for ghosts. Klaus has assured him it moves the same as it does for the living. Ben isn’t sure Klaus, stoned out of his mind, bleeding sluggishly from his arm, knew what he was talking about.

Anyway.

Klaus.

He’s wearing the coat he’s been flaunting around for the past week. His shirt is see-through, with little stars on it, like a pale imitation of the sky. Ben remembers his pants had laces on them, he’s sure they did not a minute ago, before the brightness that threatened to wipe out his very soul -- his soul is all he has left, really. His gaze drifts down anyway, to check.

Yes. Klaus’ pants have laces up the sides.

“No,” Ben says. Klaus is laying in a heap on the ground, his fingers curled like his tendons have been cut.

His lips feel numb because they always feel numb. Because Ben can’t feel at all. He takes a step. “No,” he says again, louder, surer. “No!”

Klaus looks up at him. His makeup is smudged, like it tends to be. His lips are bitten raw, like they tend to be. His hair is a mess, like it tends to be, and like it will be, always, because Klaus isn’t breathing.

Klaus is lying in a heap on the ground. Klaus is standing above his own body. Klaus is reaching for Ben like he’s hoping to touch him for the first time in years. Just when Klaus’ cold, dead, fingers brush his face, a voice from behind says, so quietly, dripping with disbelief: “Ben?”

Ben shuts his eyes and wishes desperately he could cry.

He feels a hand on his shoulder, for the first time in so, so long, but he also doesn’t feel it at all. He feels-but-doesn’t-feel someone turn him around, until they are saying, “Ben? Ben!” and he has no choice but to open his eyes and face the music.

Diego is gripping his shoulders like he is a dying man and Ben is the answer. Behind him, Luther and Allison watch them, stunned silent. Allison’s hands are pressed to her mouth. She looks like she wants to cry. 

And Vanya. Little Vanya, painted white. Her head is hung as her shoulders shake with the weight of the destruction she has so inevitably caused. (Ben would say he always knew she was destined for great things -- but he can’t, because he didn’t.) (Nobody ever said great things had to be good.)

The Hargreeves siblings are dead. Their bodies are strewn across what is left of their childhood home, smouldering and burning, and Ben is very aware of that fact.

righto anyway. so they have an emotional reunion but its also kind of bitter? id have to actually write this for it to make sense so lets skip it for now lol

five shows up

he cannot see them obviously bc theyre all ghosts

god if i did write this it would be such a monster of a fic and would take me like 2 years to finish i already know fhkjdsk

somehow ?? they manage to influence the world around them maybe? idk maybe now that klaus is dead hes sober

or maybe hes high for all eternity?

for the purposes of this au lets say he died sober or in the late stages of withdrawal, and bc ghosts cant feel pain in action hes sober

so EVENTUALLY they figure out how to corporealize bc klaus is like blam wham ghost powers

asdlfk that sounds so stupid im sorry

he would say that tho imho,,, it sounds like something hed say,,,

if i DID write this it would be alternating povs also,,,

ok so out of all of them klaus and ben have the most experience homeless

and while being stuck in an apocalypse is not at all the same thing as being homeless it does help to have some knowledge

five doesnt eat the twinkie!! good for him

dammit okay. theres 2 options we can take here. in the comics five couldnt get back bc he fucked up his math and spent 15 years doing the wrong thing, but if u apply that here, with 6 other ppl checking his work this could be avoided and they end up skipping the whole assassin shtick and just hopping straight back to 2019, ready to prevent the apocalypse

OR five still gets hired for the commission but the sibs are tagging along

i think bc five isnt completely alone in this au unfortunately dolores doesnt exist :((

for each other the 2 paths tho theres also options?? bc they (ghosts) can go back in time and inhabit their past selves bodies? OR they could just,,, cease to exist

IM JUST NOW REALIZING HOW MANY PATHS THIS COULD TAKE,, AAH FUCK

okay gonna split this into parts. this is gonna be so long brace yourselves.

1) they go back in time because math checking and the ghosts swap out for their past selves

after multiple years of being stuck in an apocalypse together i think they would learn to get along with each other. like at least a little bit

which would make it easier for them to prevent the apocalypse

bc theyd:

trust each other more

already know abt the apocalypse and not have to wait for five to grace them all with his knowledge

are working as a team from the very beginning

have open lines of communication

yeah uh. so there

vanya is also already aware of her powers so the whole harold goading her into turning against her family and snapping to wipe out all life on earth thing? yeah that doesnt happen

oh and harold wouldn’t know how to do that in the first place because klaus wouldn’t throw out reggie’s journal! this solves so many problems wtf

there’s still commission issues bc they (and by they i mean five) are on the commission’s radar

so there’s still dope fight scenes sdlkfd pinky promise

okay idk. they stop the apocalypse and everything is okay the end hfkjd

2) they fix the math but only five can go back and the ghosts cease to exist

this is just sad! it would be sad okay! im sad! lets move on

subset of the past one: ben CAN go back with five because he was already dead and time travel affects them differently or something idk

aaaaaa

five & ben dynamic duo would be dope as shit BUT five would not be able to see him... so they use klaus as a middleman fjsdsfd

is there 2 bens? is one ben deleted in favor of the time-traveling ben? i dont know! i dont know my brain is melting

either way shit is happening yall!! obviously klaus is clued in, directly or indirectly it doesnt matter but he is on board the ‘don’t let the entire world end in flames’ train

3) they join the commission and then when five goes back in time they all go back

this is fun because now five is a highly trained assassin who is also lowkey a complete marshmallow for his siblings and once again TEAMWORK WOO

basically the first path but now five has a gun fhsdjk

4) they join the commission but five has to leave them behind and they cease to exist

five with a gun but hes sad now

i didnt go into how much losing his siblings would suck in the prev path but like. it would suck so much. he’s already lost them once if you think about it when he time traveled the first time and yeah he found the adult ghost versions but,, its different

and now suddenly hes stuck with these strange adult versions of the people he knows and he KNOWS them but also he doesnt? at all? they dont have all the years of shared experiences together? and theyre all grown up from the first ‘set’ of siblings he had which for five was like 40+ years ago??

SCREAMS

i have losing my mind disease (self-diagnosed)

subset: five has to leave them behind but they still exist because the commission is out-of-time kind of? idk but they’re still floating around somewhere and come back to impact the plot later or something

yeah idk. literally just wrote them down bc i didnt want them to die^2 hfkjwehd

subset: they still exist but instead of being just Somewhere they’re specifically at the assassination of JFK onwards because thats where five left them and they either go on ghosting and make an appearance in s2 OR they cease because them-wise they havent died yet but that doesnt make sense because ghosts can time travel so nevermind

i dont have the brain energy left to explore this one aaaa

okay jesus christ i think that’s all

I DON’T KNOW. i don’t know. i might write some more of this because honestly it is a very fine flavor of angst + hurt/comfort <3

[shoutoismybaby]

WereDragons

Can I get a Fantasy AU scenario with Half dragon Kirishima where he’s just sent to find some food by bakugou and during the trip he sees a group of dragon shapeshifters around a half dragon girl who looks terribly hurt (like arrows and just sword wounds) and he sees the group just leave her there sad flushing away and he rescues her and from then on they fall for each other?

***

This is a repost bc tumblr ate the old one

This is sooo cute! Sorry its so long, Warnings of Blood, injuries, mention of Bakuraka

***

Kirishima didn’t usually mind being sent out for food by bakugou. He actually enjoyed getting his alone time to enjoy nature or walk through towns without the blonde yelling at him. Of course there was a reason Bakugou would often yell at him, especially in towns. The reason being that it could be dangerous for him to enter, no matter how much he loved talking to the new people he would meet, it was not a good time to be a weredragon. Dragons were known to be evil, greedy creatures who destroyed homes. So even being part dragon got you stuck with that reputation, and the horns, wings, and sharp teeth that remained even in human form made it hard to hide what he was. Kirishima knew that humans often attacked unprovoked because they were scared, but that didn’t make the wounds any less painful. He would fly away from every attack if he could, but weredragons had an extremely long transforming time due to the large size difference between their forms. Not to mention how helpless they were during the transformation, it often left them unable to fight as their body shifted, making Kirishima never transform without Bakugou around to keep a lookout. 

Kirishima considered himself lucky that he had never been the target of an attack, most likely due to the fact that he found Bakugou when they were both young. The feral boy growing into a possibly more feral man whe chose Kirishima for a best friend. They would both defend one another to death, even though a certain person would never admit to such.

Being friends with Bakugou, however, meant being away on a constant adventure. Not that Kirishima really minded, he really never found a village he truly fit in at, even those that were peaceful. Plus, he loved exploring and could never turn away helping whatever village they came across. Which is why he often walked instead of flying when in search of food. It was harder to come across villages, yes. But he often found people in need of assistance. He liked to think he was changing the world's perception of dragons little by little, but Bakugou just thought he was gullible and too selfless for his own good.

But there was nothing the horned boy loved more than being someone’s hero.

So of course, when he heard panicked voices on his search for food he jogged towards the commotion right away. Quickly coming across a small clearing not too far away from the main path, littered with what looked to be other weredragons. Despite how his heart jumped in excitement at seeing some of his own kind, he remained hidden behind a tree. It was well known that some tribes of his species were, for lack of a better word, savages who attacked outsiders. It was while he was trying to see through the sea of about 10 bodies while also remaining in hiding that he began to hear soft whimpers and cries. From in between their legs, he spotted you. Laying on the ground as though you had collapsed, well you probably had. Your body was covered in blood and various arrows stuck out all over. Your face was contorted in pain, eyes squeezed shut. Kirishima's heart began to beat rapidly, why weren’t they helping you?

“how could you be so stupid?” Kirishima’s ears finally caught bits on the conversation.

“You weren’t raised to be so weak!” A males voice seemed to overpower the rest, he looked to be the leader, standing closest to you but showing no motive to tend to your wounds. “You know we can’t help you.”

Kirishima's eyes furrowed, what was this guy talking about?! You had fatal wounds that required treatment immediately.

“Please,” Your soft voice cut through, cutting off all other conversations. “I didn’t see them coming and there were so many.”

“That's your fault, and now you’ve probably led them to us!” The leader of the group spoke once again, and you visibly flinched. It was then that Kirishima's hunch about coming across a tribe was confirmed. Tribes had a hierarchy and, due to the current hunt on dragons in certain kingdoms, they valued strength above all else. And you getting attacked and so badly injured would do serious harm on your reputation. But from what it seemed, it was earning you excommunication.

“I’m sorry,” A sob racked your body and Kirishima couldn't tell if it was because of the pain or what was happening.

“Let's go.” The leader demanded. Kiri wished that he could jump into action right then. Convince them to stay and help you, but revealing himself would only put the both of you in more danger. Especially if they were right about the human that attacked you heading towards the group. The group seemed hesitant until the leader spread his wings, beckoning for the others to follow his example. A few looked sympathetic, but took off as the man did. Once they had finally taken off, shapeshifting into dragons once in the are, Kirishima made his way over to you. You had now curled into a ball as much as you could manage without inflicting even more pain to yourself. Your wings laid over your body, in a way that was hiding your face and that revealed how broken it was to Kirishima.

Upon hearing his footsteps you only curled into yourself more, releasing a pained hiss as the arrows were moved.

“I don't want to hurt you,” Kiri said, holding up his arms as though you could see them, “I just want to help. Your injuries look really bad. They could get infected... Or worse, if you don't let me help you.”

At this, you moved your wing from your face with a wince, and Kirishima's breath caught in his throat. He didn't think you’d be so beautiful up close.

“They’re probably not far behind, it would be smarter of you if you just left me.” You muttered, refusing to look him in the eye.

“Maybe, but I couldn't call myself a man if I did that either. Let me help, please.” He begged, getting increasingly worried as he noticed the blood pooling on the ground.

“What do you plan on doing then?” You asked,

“Well, I have a mage friend named Uraraka that lives in a small village a day or two from here called Tokyo. She’s taught me and my friend some healing remedies I could use in the meantime.” Kirishima explained, kneeling down next to you.

“You're planning on taking me to a village over a day away?” You asked, “Why?”

Kirishima looked up at you and sighed,

‘I don't know if you can feel it yet, you might still be in shock. But all these wounds, their fatal and-”

“And why do you care!?” You yelled, the people in your tribe had never done anything that didn’t benefit them. So what did he think he was going to get from this situation? A girlfriend? Because if so he could think again. “You don't know me, or anything about what happened to me. Why does it matter to you if I live or not if it's only going to inconvenience you?” Kirishima was taken back at your outburst. No one had really ever yelled at him when he was just trying to help them before. Well, other than bakugou, who ended up being his best friend. Which is probably why he didn't let your outburst faze him for too long.

“I don't know why I care, but I do and I want to help you. It wouldn't feel right to leave you here to die. What happened doesn't really matter to me. Now can I check your wounds?” He asked. You hesitated before accepting that he was your only chance at survival and nodded. You're adrenalin was wearing off and you could feel it. You knew the lack of blood was beginning to hit you, you began to feel drained and so, so sleepy. But each time he moved you to count your injuries a sharp pain from all over your body reminded you that you were very much alive. And you wanted to stay that way. It was a couple minutes before he spoke again, and you felt a lot calmer for some reason. “I’m going to pick you up and put you on my back okay? Its gonna hurt a lot but I need to get you to where my friend and I are staying.”

“A different friend, how many do you have?” You chuckled, “What are they like?”

“He can be aggressive and temperamental. And he doesn't really like other people.”

‘He sounds like an ass.” You yawned, but Kirishima just shook his head.

“He comes off that way, but he’s really not. Plus, he’s much better attending to wounds than I am.” Kirishima explained, and you had meant to respond. You really did. But it was at that moment you gave Kirishima a mini heart attack because you had blacked out. 

The poor dragon boy had thought for a minute he had already been too late to save you. But in the end, he was glad you had passed out because it ended up making the travel to the cave he and bakugou had claimed much easier.

Sadly, it didn’t help with convincing Bakugou to help him.

“Bakugou please,” Kirishima pouted,

“Your pet, your problem.”

“She’s not a pet.” Kirishima frowned, laying you on the ground. “Please, her wounds are fatal.”

This is what made Bakugou look down from his spot on top of the cave.

“What happened?” He asked, making his way down to the ground. 

“I think she got attacked by humans,” Kirishima explained,

“Wait, you don't know for sure!?” Bakugou asked, “How do you know she's not some sort of villain?” “Well, I watched her get kicked out of her tribe-”

“She’s from a tribe?!” “And it seems that she got attacked by humans. Please, Bakugou!” Kirishima begged once more, Bakugou took his sweet time thinking it over and glanced at your limp form. “Fine, but if she ends up trying to kill us. It's your fault.” He made his way down from the cave and growled as he got a better look at your condition. “Start cleaning her wounds, she’s going to end up needing a healing spell, but the potions I know how to make should help until we can get her to Uraraka. Also, you owe me for this”

Bakugou kept watch over you as the feeling of wind gliding through your hair brought you back to consciousness. Eyes opening to reveal the night sky, and you suddenly knew you were being carried on a dragons back. The tough scales under your fingers a familiar feeling, and the warmth that radiated from them was comforting. But you knew that no one in your tribe would ever carry you like this, and thus you began to remember what had last happened to you. You attempted to shift, being able to sit up once you got a hang of how the bandages around your body were wrapped. You went to pick at them only to jump when you heard a gruff voice sound from behind you.

“Go back to sleep, we’ll be there in a couple hours.” You turned your head to see the grumpy man who had finally decided to grab your attention. It didn't take you long to figure out that this must be the friend the boy had mentioned.

“Where?” Bakugou already decided he was annoyed with you, but he didn’t want to deal with Kirishima's whining if he ever caught wind Bakugou was anything but”pleasant” towards you.

“Tokyo, where the mage lives. He said he told you already” His red eyes rolled and he leaned back against the base of the dragon's neck, closing them. It was then that you realized you could probably get answers to the questions that had been brushed off before.

“When I asked him, he didn't really give me a clear answer but, why are you guys helping me out?” You asked, watching as he seemed to get more annoyed that you weren’t going back to sleep like he told you.

“Kirishima has a heart too big for his body, he’s always liked helping people even if it puts him in danger. Like an idiot.” You nodded your head and looked back out at the clouds and stars you were passing. “Since I answered your question. Answer mine. What kind of tribe were you a part of?”

“Well, it was,” You paused and thought for a moment. “The emphasis was on being the strongest. The stronger you were, and the better you were at hunting, the higher status you had. Which is part of the reason I got, you know, after being attacked.”

“You’re not strong?” The blonde cocked his brows,

“Not compared to the tribe, no. But I also wasn’t born there so I was always at a disadvantage to start with.” You explained,

“You weren't born to the tribe?” The boy began to look even more questionable of you. Tribes didn’t take anyone in. What made you so special?

“No, umm. My village got destroyed when I was little, leaving me alone and afraid in the woods. Where they found me and agreed to take me in. If that clears up anything for you.” You didn’t end up receiving a verbal response, but he seemed to be thinking it through. “What’s your name?”

“Bakugou. Don’t wear it out,” He demanded, “Yours?” He asked,

“(F/n).” He didn’t respond, and eventually, the exhaustion caught up with you once more and you laid back down. Letting the stars lure you back to sleep.

***

It didn’t feel like long before you were awake again, it was warm and you could feel the blankets piled on top of you. Your eyes found the detailed ceiling of a cabin. You sat up, realizing that the only thing left from your wounds was a dull ache. The room was empty, save for a small table holding various books and beakers filled with colorful fluids. You assumed you had made it to the mages, and the window near your bed informed you that it was almost dusk. You gently pulled yourself out from beneath the covers and walked over to the window, you seemed to be on the second floor, giving you a good view of what you remembered was called Tokyo. It was a busy village, you could many see shops and people bustling around below. The shops to close before dark, and the people to buy before the stores closed. Looking directly below you could see the blond from last night, Bakugou, who was talking to a short brunette in front of the cabin. She was handing him a piece of paper and he looked strangely calm, it didn't fit his face well. You would have continued watching, but you heard the door open from behind you. You jumped and turned towards the noise. But the impact of your knees back on the floor caused your knees buckle. Before you could hit the floor, however, you felt strong arms around you.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you.” You looked up to see the face of Kirishima, his sharp teeth appearing through his smile.

“I-its okay.” You blushed, allowing him to help you up and sit you back on the bed. “Thanks for saving me, again.”

“Oh,” he scratched the back of his head, “It’s not a problem.”

“How long has it been? Since we met.” He paused and thought, sitting down next to you.

“About three days.”

“Three days! I’ve been with you guys for three days?” You asked,

“Did you have anywhere else to be?” He looked concerned,

“No, I don’t really have anywhere to go now. Can’t go back home.” You looked at your hands as you said this, the reality setting in. You were alone, you had no one and no place to call home anymore. The scars that littered your fingers seemed to mock you, you had worked so hard for so long. Now it just didn’t matter.

“Why don’t you join us, we’re always going on adventures and doing quests for money. And even though Bakugou says its dumb I think we can really help change how people see dragons. Really make a difference, you know?” You could tell there was a hidden meaning behind his words,

“Get humans to stop trying to kill us like they did to me.” You muttered, clenching your fist. Sure, you didnt have anywhere to go. But try to help humans to change their minds?

Humans didn’t seem the type to ever realise they were wrong.

“Yeah,” He sighed, “I know you probably don’t like them much but, they’re just like us! They get scared and-” “They almost killed me!” You turned to him, wide eyed and teeth bared.

“And two of them helped save you.” He pointed out. “If we want humans to stop assuming all dragons are bad, maybe we have to put faith in them. Even if they dont deserve it. Plus, you can leave whenever you want. It’s not like I’m trying to force you. Just, give it a try?”

His large hand was held out to you, big red eyes sparkling, and you couldn’t bring yourself to refuse him.

And just like that those three days turned into a year. A year that you spent traveling, going on adventures, completeing quests, and what had become your favorite of all. Helping people, and maybe the rewards that came with it. You couldn’t deny your inner want of a shiny hoard no matter how hard you tried. Especially when the group that had become your best friends also seemed to indulge in the occasional collection of jewels. It had been just you, the mage, Bakugou, and kirishima for the past 12 months, and it was the best time of your life. You had never been more free, but as the winter drew near, there was still something you wished for.

“(Y/n)?” You turned to look back into the cave your group had claimed for hte night,seeing Kirishima make his way over to you. “What are you doing up?”

“Can’t sleep.” You answered simply, shivering as a cool breeze moved through the opening where you sat. You looked behind the half-dragon to see Bakugou and Uraraka cuddled up near the fire, you were happy for them. Yet bitter. You turned back to admire the stars as Kirishima sat down next to you.

“Not a comfortable enough cave?” He attempted to joke, but you just shrugged.

“No, it’s just,” You shifted, “cold.”

There was a sudden warmth through your body as he set his arm around your shoulder, and pulled you close.

“You could have just said so,” You let yourself relax into his hold, “but I dont think being so far away from the fire is helping any.”

“Probably not,” You chuckled, “but I needed some time to think.”

“About what?” Your eyes widened at the question, if he really knew what you were thinking about he wouldn’t have asked. Day dreaming about an impossible future you had with him was stupid. Bakugou would have mocked you for being as airheaded as Kirishima, but you couldn’t help it. Not when he smiled like that. “You can tell me anything, you know that.”

You sighed, turning your face towards his own. You were so close. His nose almost touching yours and you could feel his breath fan over your face. It made your brain scramble.

“My lips are cold, too.” You blurted out, face immediately turning red once you realized what you said. But you weren’t going to back out now, you weren’t that kind of person.. “If you want to, you can warm the-”

You didn’t get to finish your sentence before his lips were on yours. They were hot, almost burning, but you loved it. Too soon when he pulled away, a dorky smile on his face.

“I want to warm your lips up for the rest of my life.” his voice was breathless and you couldn’t help but giggle at him,

“I won’t stop you.”

***

[yoursummerfrost]

Would you be willing to talk about your writing process? How many drafts you go through, how early on you run something by a beta, do you outline or not, etc.? I'm really curious to get a feel for how folks write!

Sure!! Not sure how coherent this will be but let's see lol. Also you'll notice that certain pieces vary a lot. Writing process under the cut! 

Getting an idea: Most of the time, I get my fic ideas from either songs or random conversations with friends, and they're typically a sort of precipitating event or premise that leads to a character exploration. (Examples: What if Geralt was a ghost haunting Jaskier's house? What if Dan actually stayed for that drink Lucifer offered him?) But sometimes I look for a plot on purpose (e.g., I had been DYING to write a time loop for literal years before I finally worked out how I wanted it to look by brainstorming ways to subvert the conventions w/in the trope). 

It's hard to like, delineate this tho because in reality it's sort of messy and mushed bc of how my brain works. Like, the truer to life approximation of deciding to write and yet so far from death was more like: receiving comfort as the reminder you are lacking it -> ooh ghost love story as ultimate yearning -> who would be more fun to write as a ghost? -> Jaskier as ghost = inversion of dynamic / Geralt as ghost = extension of dynamic -> Geralt as ghost sounds fun -> why would Jaskier be stuck in a house with a ghost? -> he's retiring from a life on the road -> what Jaskier is lacking is permanence/stability -> ghost story as paradox of permanence and impermanence -> okay but on the plot level what would happen if Geralt was haunting Jaskier's house?

Outlining: I usually start writing without formalizing an outline, just to get a feel for the story itself, but I tend to have an idea for the major beats/the thesis statement living amorphously in my brain. Then partway thru the fic I type out an actual outline tracking major occurrences and functions of scenes; occasionally I'll write a whole fic without an outline tho, especially if it's shorter (<16k).

Drafting/Editing: I do somewhere between 1.5 and 2 drafts, depending on how you define a distinct draft ig? I've never completely rewritten a whole story like some schools of writing suggest, but I will definitely go back and make edits. I usually self-edit as I go and then do a full re-read/edit at the end of draft completion. For the as-you-go stuff, I typically re-read everything I wrote the day before which helps both 1) get me into the mood for writing again and 2) make any small tweaks etc + catch typos. When I do the big edit at the end, I try to change something about how I physically read the draft (e.g. read on computer instead of phone, change the font) which helps shake up my brain I guess?

Betaing: I am deeply spoiled by my friends and endlessly grateful for them, lol. At minimum, I like having someone I can excitedly flail about my ideas with while I'm writing (usually multiple someones) and talk through stuff that might be stumping me (e.g. idk if it would be funnier if X or Y happened, hey do you think vampires can feel the cold), and then someone--often the same person but not always--do a full read-through after the fic is done. A lot of times, especially for longer stuff or when I'm feeling down on myself, I'll ask someone to beta and/or cheerread along with me while I write. And I bug them with lots of questions like "Is this landing for you? Do I need to slow down the dialogue here? Am I funny even a little bit?" and they offer feedback and/or encouragement. But also sometimes I get impatient and/or cannot tolerate concrit so I just fling it into the void without beta lol

Other stuff: it's also worth noting that I daydream about my projects constantly? Showering/laying in bed before or after sleep/driving places is all prime fic plotting time. If I'm listening to music, whatever song I'm listening to will probably become related to a fic. This isn't like, a conscious ~dedication~ thing: it's pure, unadulterated neurodivergent hyperfixation. Also, I rarely read other people's fic if I'm writing any of my own, bc for me the writing and reading circuits are quite different, but I re-read/re-watch the source material a lot.

I do also re-read my own fic a decent amount, partly because I genuinely enjoy my own writing and partly because I like noticing my own trends/recurring themes/etc which is easier to do if you take in your work later, at more of a distance. Reading people’s comments about what they enjoyed is also helpful, because it gives me a sense of what things land and what things don’t (or don’t get commented on as being a stand-out, at least). I don’t enjoy getting concrit outside of beta I’ve specifically asked for, but I very much enjoy hearing what people did like so I can do more of it.

Titling/Summaries: Usually I come up with a title partway through writing based on a song I've found to take inspiration from. I get really excited when I find a title, lol. I hate summaries very much except for when I love them? I semi-recently converted to the school of using a snappy quote from the fic to make the summary, which makes my job easier lol. I usually like picking quotes that are 1) relatively brief, 2) encapsulate the tone of the fic, and 3) not huge spoilers. Sometimes I'll write a line and go, "yup, that's gonna be the summary," which is fun.