#it just my lame duck ass!

[seat-safety-switch]

"Don't fix your car," said the guru, "but fix yourself instead."

Yeah, thanks for that, bud. I get plenty of exercise walking home from the various places that my shitboxes have left me stranded. Grocery stores. Movies. Weddings. The mall. My job. Prison.

Once, one of my jobs gave me a step meter, as part of a company initiative to "improve wellness" and stop asking for raises all the time because we're too busy walking to unionize. After I walked a mere fifteen kilometres home and back to bring a fresh battery to my stricken daily driver, the watch started smoking and gave up. Might have been because I used it to jump the battery, but the manual didn't say not to.

What I'm trying to say is that the advice from that well-intentioned mentor was not very useful in my exact situation. He was just babbling something that sounded deep in order to get me out of his meditation hut, where I had ducked in to warm myself before continuing my six-hour walk back home to get another car. Even if I were to achieve perfect inner peace, I'd still have to drive places and interact with the imperfect outer world. Cars break down, which is why we like them so much. If they worked flawlessly forever, they'd have no character at all.

About thirty minutes later, I reached enlightenment, and realized what the guru had meant the whole time. Walking was the lame thing to do. Although fashionable in Paris, it's very slow, and the correct way to deal with my crap-cans would be to get more organized. I had to invest in my system, not in my tools.

If I were to park cars all over town, then I would be no more than four blocks from a running car. And if that one turned out to also be dead, maybe because some dumbass hasn't driven it in several months because it's six hours' walk away from his house, then I would only be four blocks away from another car. And so on. There was literally no downside.

Later, it turned out that I represented over 60% of the cars being parked in my town. By simply offering to withdraw my vehicles, I could wildly control the price of parking all over the city. Turns out that also affected parking-company stocks, which is how that so-called guru got incredibly rich following my ass around and shorting whatever company pissed me off that week. That's enlightenment for you.

[star-writes-fanfiction]

Heyyy could you possibly write a oneshot with Natasha Romanoff as a soft dom like you had her in your nsfw headcannons? Like if she was jealous at a party or something? Also I love your writing sm I just found you and am very happy I did :)

Omg of course this made me smile so much 😭😭 ur so nice :)) I wrote this from a female pov - I assume that's what you wanted but if not I can write it with different pronouns and stuff. <3

Cw: smut [<fingering, oral, edging, scissoring>], NOT PROOF READ, may edit later.

:: j e a l o u s y :: ☆ :: n a t a s h a ::

It was yet another party at the tower celebrating yet another stupid thing that Natasha couldn't care less about. I mean, she's not exactly shy around a crowd, not when she could easily beat them up in a matter of seconds, but she's not an extrovert by any means.

You, on the other hand, love to talk and interact with everyone, not staying in one conversation too long before making your way to the next. That night wasn't any different - you'd already made your way around half of the room, complimenting outfits and dress shoes.

And that's how you ended up talking to Carol, while Natasha glared at you from the bar with her watchful eye.

You weren't flirting - you wouldn't do that to Natasha - but perhaps you telling Carol her hair looked nice while running your hair through it was interpreted differently by your girlfriend. Before you even noticed her moving, she was by your side, arm around your waist.

"Sorry to interrupt you, Carol, but I need to talk to my girlfriend about something," she said with a slight snarl, taking you by the wrist.

"Oh! Umm, see you later Carol, I guess," you said, making a lame attempt to wave as you were dragged along.

Natasha led you up to her office, heels clacking on the floorboards as she walked. "What the Hell was that?" She asked when you got to the door, pulling it open and pushing you through it. You stuttered in reply, unsure of what she meant. "What was what? What did I do?" You asked with a yelp as she picked you up and placed you on her desk.

Her arms crossed in disapproval. "Your little married couple act with Carol. 'Til death do us part my ass." She began to unzip your dress as she talked - you blushed a furious shade of red. "We weren't flirting, I was just being nice, Tash," you protested, squirming as her hands pulled the dress over your head. "Well, I hope you enjoyed it, because I'm not gonna be so nice to you."

She rubbed her hands over the top of your bra, fingers finding the back and deftly removing it. Your nipples hardened as they came into contact with the cold air, Natasha taking one into her mouth, fingers playing with the other. You let out a soft breathy moan at her actions, letting your eyes flutter shut.

Her mouth moved slowly down your front, planting kisses as she went. When she reached your panties, she smirked against your skin. "Mm, you ready, Princess?" Her thumbs hooked onto the lace of your underwear, giving it a gentle tug. "You're so beautiful," she muttered, ducking her head down between your thighs. You gasped at the sudden contact, falling back onto your elbows.

Being a woman herself, Natasha knew exactly were your most sensitive spots were. She smiled as her tongue latched around your clit, your body trembling and back arching.

"Bet Carol can't fuck you like I can..." she muttered as her fingers replaced her mouth, curling in you and reaching that spot that made you see stars.

"God, Natasha, keep going!" You shouted as you felt your orgasm building. As if on cue, Natasha pulled out of you, all her work disintegrating into nothingness. She planted a kiss on your forehead. "You really thought I'd let you cum after what you did? You'll have to earn it baby," she said, tangling her fingers through your hair.

You pouted. "Please, Natasha?" You said, looking up at her with puppy dog eyes. She looked unimpressed. "Do it yourself," she said, smirking as she pulled out a vibrator from her desk's top drawer. Why does she have that in there? You thought before coming to your senses. She wanted you to... touch yourself... in front of her?

"Go on," she said, sitting back in her chair and watching you as your face as you experienced every emotion known to mankind. God, this is embarrassing... you thought as the vibrations came into contact with your clit, sending fireworks through your body. But any humiliation was quickly replaced with intense pleasure, your body shaking as your orgasm approached.

"Oh my God, Natasha," you said, back arching as you came dangerously close to your climax. It'll never be as good if it's not Natasha, you thought sourly as you came, probably ruining her paperwork.

"Good girl, you did great," Natasha said, disposing of her own dress and panties and climbing onto the desk. You lifted up your chin so your eyes met hers. "Have you ever been scissored, Princess?" She asked with a gentle smile. Whatever annoyance she'd had before had now been replaced with a need to pleasure you.

You shook your head. "That's fine, I'll guide you," she said, tangling her legs with yours and lowering herself down. "God, Princess," she said softly, beginning to move. The contact felt so undeniably euphoric, and eventually you found your rhythm until you were both a grinding jumble. Natasha ran a hand through her cherry-red hair, her eyes rolling back. Your breathing was replaced with guttural moans as your rubbed against one another, your thighs shaking as your second climax arrived. "Natasha, I'm gonna cum-" you said, and she smiled. "It's okay, my love, me too," she said, her moments becoming less and less mechanical and more sloppy. Your side left the table as you both came, shocked by how good you felt.

"God, Tash, remind me to chat up girls again next time," you joked, pulling your legs away and starting to clean yourself up.

"Don't you dare," she replied with equal enthusiasm, standing up from the desk. Damn, that was hot...

OMG I'M SO SORRY IF IT SUCKED I've never written lesbian porn before lmao 😭😭 anyways tysm for requesting, and plz like and rb as always yall. I love you guys!

- star ✨️

[tilebytiles]

till you tell me to leave - a.t.

summary: alex would probably let you stay at his house for the rest of your life, right? word count: 3k warnings: making out so a little suggestive, major fluff otherwise a/n: this was SUPPOSED to be a short little drabble but quickly turned into a whole self-indulgent thing bc cowboy!al is very special to me. smiles cutely cowboy!al masterlist

the first time you went to alex’s farm, you were immediately reluctant to leave. you were situated on twilight’s saddle, ambling along behind alex and lizzie and barely past the front gates that he’d just opened before already trying to cook up some lame, half-assed excuse for your parents so you could stay another day. or two. or maybe for the rest of your life. he had a lot of land to his name; the fence around his property stretched on for a while, and the path that led to his house was a bit of a long one, although not unbearably so. to your immediate right was a little pond and — were those fucking ducks?

“you alright?” he asked, his low chuckle snapping you out of your momentary mystification. you gripped the reins and nudged twilight around so you could face him, watching as he pushed the gates shut. you did, admittedly, watch the way his arm muscles flexed in the sunlight for just a little too long to be considered normal.

“you have ducks,” you said, as if that explained everything.

“that i do.” lizzie’s reins in hand, he approached you and your steed, peering up at you from beneath the rim of his hat. if you didn’t know any better, you would have reached over and snatched it from his head to put it on your own. unfortunately, you did know better, and your relationship with alex was nowhere near the level that you felt was appropriate for riding a cowboy.

the dirt shifted and was kicked up beneath his boots and your horses’ hooves as the two of you made your way down the path to his house. the silence that settled in the air was comfortable, although you did still try to search for things to say. finding none, you opted to look around the property some more, now that you weren’t so distracted by the ducks. the area immediately surrounding his house and, consequently, the farm had been cleared of trees, although there were trees closer to the perimeter, making the fence almost imperceptible. you could hear birds chirping in the distance, and one of the ducks quacked. scattered throughout the grass were flowers of different kinds. the sun was out, but it wasn’t uncomfortably hot; just bright. you felt like you’d stepped into a scene out of a fairytale, not your boyfriend’s farm.

ah. boyfriend. that term still felt weird to use.

although he’d given you his phone number and texted you regularly (you remembered the smile he’d given you when he said “i’m not good with phones, but f’you, i’ll try”), your relationship with him hadn’t been solidified until the last time he’d dropped by your house for a quick visit. it wasn’t intentional — neither of you had planned to bring it up to your parents, but when you’d sat down for dinner, your father chewed his food and eyed alex for several seconds before saying, “you want my blessin’, boy?”

alex nearly choked on his water. he coughed a few times and set his glass down, spluttering, “what?”

“hon, what did i tell you about scarin’ him like that?” your mother scolded, lightly swatting at your father’s arm.

his resolve was stronger than steel, though. “you think i’m blind?” he pointed his knife accusatorially at alex. “i’ve seen the way you look at my daughter. i might be old, but i’m no fool. i’ve seen it all, boy.” he lowered his knife to carve another piece out of his steak. “you’re pinin’ after her the same way i pined after m’wife.”

you dropped your fork and buried your face into your hands. “papa, please,” you groaned.

“your … wife.” alex’s foot nudged yours beneath the table, a silent plea for your help. you all but kicked him, making him hiss under his breath. he was on his own.

"don't pay him any mind," the wife in question said, waving her hand dismissively at her husband's words. "he's jus' grumpy 'cause i didn't let him have his nightly beer."

"right." alex didn't seem to buy her reassurances — he might've looked a little more panicked, actually — but he certainly wasn't about to dwell on it. he glanced over at you then, setting his fork down. "marriage wouldn't be ... so bad."

"alex!" you hissed, kicking his foot again. he winced. you glared at your father. "no more marriage talk. i’m not even twenty-one yet."

later that night, as alex laid beside you, arm draped over your waist and fingers drawing lazy circles against your back, his expression grew contemplative. "i meant what i said earlier, y'know."

you opened your eyes. you'd almost fallen asleep. "what do you mean?"

"about marriage. i think i’d like t' marry ya someday."

you were sure he could make out your blush in the darkness. "well ..." you let out a small huff. "that's not for a while."

"no, i s'pose not." silence, then, "can i at least call you mine?"

and that was that.

alex’s home was quaint; not too big and not too small, it was constructed of wood and had a porch with stairs that led up to it. on the porch were two rocking chairs, as well as a table with a lantern. one of the chairs had a blanket draped over its back; you wondered how much time he spent out there. with his help, you hopped off of twilight and followed him up the steps to the front door. late nights were etched into the wood that surrounded you, and when he saw you eyeing a small stain beside one of the rocking chairs, he said, “nick spilled his whiskey there. was never able to get rid of that damn stain.”

his keys jingled as he pushed one into the knob and unlocking the door, swinging it open. he turned to you with a soft smile, the kind that made your heart flutter every time. “go ahead and make yourself at home, alright? i’ll take the horses ‘round back an’ bring your stuff in for ya.”

“okay.” he freed his keys from the doorknob and stuffed them back into his pocket, then turned to retrieve the horses, but not without giving you a quick peck on the forehead first. affection had become easier between you two over time, as natural as breathing. every touch, every soft utterance, felt like hot chocolate on a bleak winter’s day. the affection he held for you — you weren’t sure yet if it was love, and frankly, the L word was a scary one — never failed to set off fireworks in your head, momentarily putting your neuron pathways on halt as every cell rejoiced.

the walls of the home were painted a creamy white — briefly, you wondered if he’d built the home himself, but while alex was a lot of things, he was most definitely not a carpenter. the floor was comprised of wooden planks that were polished and shiny, and the sight of it reminded you of sliding around your house in socks as a kid. the door that led to the backyard was situated beside a large brick fireplace. in the living room, different photographs sat framed on the walls, some of landscapes and others of alex and his friends. he had a couple of guitars hanging by the fireplace, and they made you wonder how serious of a hobby playing was for him. did he know any other instruments? could he sing? you’d have to ask him at some point. there was a sofa and an armchair, and a giant rug sprawled out in the center of the room. there were bookshelves, too, and they were filled to the brim with novels, biographies, and the like. they hosted random trinkets, too. there was even a potted plant in the corner.

you made sure to slip off your shoes and leave them by the door before venturing any further. despite appearing quite rustic on the outside (and on the inside, to some degree), the interior had clear modern touches. one of these was the partially open floor plan, with a wall that spanned from floor to ceiling but not wall to wall and served as a barrier between the kitchen and the living room — it had a window installed in it, offering a glimpse of the kitchen. behind the wall sat the dining table; it was a paler wood than you’d seen so far, as were the chairs. the kitchen walls were painted the same cream color, and there were a couple of photos here, too, including some held up by magnets on the fridge. the sink and dish rack were both clear of dishes — alex must have cleaned up before he left to get you. the ceiling fan overhead had a light bulb in its center, protected by a small glass dome. the microwave sat above the oven, and there was a door that led into the pantry.

wandering back into the living room, you headed for the stairs next. there was a closet built underneath the stairs that didn’t house much, likely due to its size. you quickly ascended the staircase, which opened up into a hall on the second floor. both sides had two doors, and there was another door at the end of the hall. opening the first door on the right revealed another closet; the second door led to what you assumed to be a guest bedroom. the first door on the left was the master bedroom (where alex slept), and the second was the bathroom, which was connected to the bedroom. the door at the end of the hall led to a bigger closet than the one downstairs.

the room you were most interested in was alex’s. it wasn’t as decorated as the living room, which surprised you. one of the only photos you saw sat idly on the nightstand, right beside the bedside lamp. there was a book on the nightstand, too; you guessed he was in the middle of reading it. the window provided a nice view of the front of the property, and you peeked through the blinds to see if you could spot alex below. he was nowhere to be found, though. his bed was neatly made, and you wondered if that was a regular habit of his or if he’d only done it for you. his closet was full of jeans and button-down shirts — typical for a cowboy, you thought. he had a fair number of shoes, too.

“if you wanted to wear my clothes, you coulda just asked.” you jumped and whipped around, spotting alex in the doorway. he leaned against the frame, arms crossed, and cocked an eyebrow at you. he was smirking, too. you wanted to punch him.

you refrained, though, and smiled sheepishly. “i was just looking.”

“well, the offer stands as long as you’re here,” he said, approaching you. he stood beside you and peered into his closet, as if it, too, was his first time seeing his own wardrobe. “i think you’d look real cute in one o’ my shirts.”

you flushed and looked away. “i’d probably look kind of weird. they’d be too big on me.”

he snorted. “yeah? that’s why you’d look cute, doll.”

deciding you needed to end this conversation before you combusted, you quickly asked, “where’d you put my stuff?”

“in the other bedroom.” he jerked his head back towards the hallway. “figured we can jus’ move it in here later an’ get you properly unpacked.”

“you want me to stay in here with you?”

he threw an arm around your shoulders and pressed a lingering kiss to your temple. “what kind of prick would i be if i left my girl to sleep on her own?”

his girl — you liked how it sounded coming from him.

•••••

“alex, that’s cheating!”

“it is not! y/n, i swear on m’life, i’m not tryin’ to cheat!”

the two of you were sat in the middle of the living room floor, engaged in an intense game of uno. you hadn’t even planned to play at first, but after having dinner about an hour ago, you’d found the pack of cards on one of the shelves (one of his friends had left it after a visit). your first round, which was a practice round, was comically short-lived (“i’m rusty,” he’d said after losing in less than ten minutes). the game you were currently locked in had lasted about half an hour and showed no signs of stopping soon; each time one of you approached victory, the other took it away.

“i have to be able to see all of your cards,” you huffed. “it’s cheating.”

alex sighed, rolled his eyes and made a dramatic show of fanning his cards out further, revealing the card that had been hidden behind another. “i wasn’t trying t’ do it on purpose,” he grumbled. “why does it even matter?”

you put down a yellow 7. “because it’s the rules, alex.”

his tongue darted out to wet his lips as he set down a draw four card. “blue. i didn’t expect you to get so worked up over this, y’know.”

“the aggression is a staple of uno.” you drew four cards and swore under your breath when none of them were blue.

he planted his hand down on the floor behind him and leaned back, eyeing you over his cards. “it’s not like you.” a beat of silence, then he said, “i like it.” he dropped a blue 5.

that made you pause. “you like it?”

he hummed in response, his gaze dropping to your cards as you mulled over what to put down next. “you’re attractive when you’re frustrated.”

ah. that was what he meant. you set down a green 5, hiding behind your hand as heat rushed to your cheeks. “you’re just saying that.”

“yeah? just to get under your skin and tick ya off?”

“yeah.”

he sighed and plucked a green 6 from his hand, dropping it into the discard pile. “my mama didn’t raise a liar, so i’ll say it again: you’re hot when you’re mad, sugar.”

you looked up at him, only to find him staring right back at you. you both remained silent for a few seconds, although you were the first to speak up. “um ...” you looked away again before setting down a green draw two. "thank you." i think, you muttered internally.

he cracked a grin and set his cards down beside him, then motioned you over. “c’mere.”

you set your own cards down and maneuvered over the discard pile, being careful to not knock or scatter any cards. once you were within reach, one of his hands went to your waist and the other to the nape of your neck, pulling you in for a bruising kiss. your home quickly became his lap as you straddled him, and your hands found purchase in his hair in a desperate bid to maintain as much contact between the two of you as possible. although you had kissed like this before, it had only been very occasionally, and the way he pressed himself to you made you feel warm all over.

his teeth grazed your lower lip before his tongue plunged into your mouth, rehearsing its usual dance with yours. a quiet groan crawled out of his throat, muffled by your lips on his, and the hand that had been at your nape moved down to your ass, giving it a light squeeze. you yelped and broke the kiss, practically panting as you stared down at him. a faint string of saliva remained as the only tether between your mouths, although it quickly snapped. you were sure your face was redder than a firetruck, and you dipped your head down to hide it in his neck. his chest rumbled beneath you as he chuckled, his arms wrapping around you and keeping you tucked against him. "so shy all of a sudden," he teased.

you rolled your eyes and nipped at his neck. "shut up."

"i don't think you want me to."

you chose not to satisfy him and turned your head, looking down at his cards on the floor. you squinted. "you had a yellow 4 this entire time?"

he hummed. "that i did."

"you cheated!"

"y/n, you didn't even notice!"

after you (rightfully) called him out, the two of you decided to wrap it up for the night and head to bed. although your belongings had since been moved into his room, you opted to steal some of his clothes for the night instead. you were right — his shirts were too big on you. his shorts were, too, and they sat low on your hips. he thought you were absolutely adorable, though, and couldn't help but take pictures with his phone when he thought you weren't looking.

as you settled down for the night, he turned to lay on his side, staring at you amidst the darkness of his bedroom. "you should come over more often," he mumbled, almost as if he was talking to himself.

you turned to face him; there was hardly any space between you now. "i was kind of hoping you'd say that," you quietly admitted.

even in the darkness, you could make out his smile, soft and lazy and reserved for only you. "maybe i should kidnap ya. keep you here forever."

"i don't think my parents would like that."

he scoffed. "if i kidnapped you, i wouldn't give a damn 'bout your parents, sweetheart. wouldn't even bother with a ransom, i’d just keep ya all for m'self."

you giggled softly. "i don't know how much i’d complain if you did that, y'know."

he cocked an eyebrow. "you wanna be kidnapped?"

"that's not what i mean, alex, and you know it."

you both grew quiet after that, and you could feel sleep tugging at you, begging you to succumb to its siren song. you were a breath away from doing just that when he spoke up again. "i really oughta marry you someday, y/n."

you really hoped he would.

tags: @elexnorislingtxn / @edandmollydeservebetter / @sagegreensimmr / @billyseye / @supernaturalandpain / @not-a-big-slay

[icarusredwings]

Rewatched Deadpool 1. Took notes.

WARNING: Discussion of mental illness topics, ending yourself, trauma, violence, etc.

Civil debate/ conversation welcomed. Sorry its super long. I think a lot.

Notes:

You know what? We see Wade coloring a lot. What's our status on just giving him cartoons snacks and coloring books? He needs it.

I think we all forget how actually impressive this man is. I just watched this cancer having fucker do like 50 flips.

Whatta man is so Logan Howlett coded.

"Bad deadpool" "good deadpool!"

Deadpool has been helping kids for a while. He terrified a little creep while he himself was a huge creep.

Missed up his words and Vanessa smiled at him. With that "aw hes cute" kinda thing.

When talking about their childhood (whether he's lying or not, hes not about the uncle) and he outdos her so much that she giggles.

The first date he takes her ducking skiiballing instead of yk prostitute stuff

Hes so romantic oh my god.

Theyre giggling and joking like all the time. Personally thanksgiving is my favorite scene before he proposes with a fucking ring pop.

I shouldn't laugh but the way he said "wtf" when passing out

Vanessa instantly jumping to "what can we do? There has to be something" makes me instantly respect her as a chronically ill person myself. Partners who medically defend each other make me so happy because a lot of people divorce their partners when they get "too sick" let alone dont show up to specialist appointments.

Him accepting death so quickly is a sign of mental illness, and you can see him be confused on why shes so upset. Shes crying and hes sitting here like "why do you care if I die or not?" He physically feels so unloved that he just doesn't get it.

"I dont know. Might further the plot. " Oh, so you know about wades little mental tv show he puts on in his head as a coping mechanism?

Also... Weasel.. YOU KNOW WHO ELSE IS A WEASEL!? Shit sorry wrong movie.

Its not until now that hes crying because he realizes if he does then no more vanessa. We already know hes very co dependent and many people only care about themselves BECAUSE of other people. Which is also considered a sign of wanting to ☠️ self.

The whole "superheros are all lame ass teachers pets" thing is so funny if you think about how much beef he has with the xmen when in reality I have a feeling Wade would love charles in a "Ugh im in trouble with Daddy wheel chair again." COUGH "old bald heavens gate looking mother fucker" COUGH

"Thats not nice" No. But wade is genuienly not nice either.

"This is embarrassing. Please stop, " Colosus said what we all were thinking.

Bro literally cut/broke off his own hand and didn't whine a single time. If you ever. EVER hear this man express pain it is 99.9% his own choice to let you know that it hurts.

During his changing process, Francis says "the only thing that doesn't survive is a sense of humor" wade says "we'll see about that" and smirks.

What also makes sense to me is that he did NOT break easily. They did test after test after test and this man still wasn't breaking. His spirit is incredibly strong and as much as we enjoy joking about how stupid he is, Wade is extremely resourceful.

Its like he has created an alter ego of humor and kindess in order to keep up with the fact he DOES understand how fucked up this world is and whats happening/happened around him but refuses to acknowledge it until he has too. Ussually for survival.

Ive seen theories that he has DID or a type of Scizophreania and the voices in the comics are obviously in his head. I have mixed feelings about it because even his thoughts have thoughts of their own in some cases. Talking to no one is often a sign of abadonment, esspecially in children who are school age and get lonely when taken from their families to attend school. Its almost as if wade never lost his and hes subconsiously talking to himself to keep himself calm/ from panicking in high stress situations.

"But then how does he know hes in a movie" thats the thing. He doesn't. Hes pretending to cope. Main charaters cant die and until he dies he has this mental show/movie going on to keep himself from realizing all of this is true. That this is reality.

Cunningham mentions breakfast for his kids and suddenly, wade wakes up. Hes not joking anymore. This is a "oh shit... I wanna make breaktsst for my kids too... with my wife vanessa" moment.

"So whats wrong with him?"

Diiiiiddd we all forget about scout master kevin? Uncle? Dad? That fact that the oxygen was physically taken from his brain and was given Co2 poisoning over and over? For multiple days? This is the same man who blew himself up just to escape because they told him he wasnt going to see vanessa again.

And then he fought a guy naked, survived the entire building burning down, and now is so insecure about his looks that he thinks he made the baby cry in the street.

Theres people staring at him, flinching away, called names, people see him and cross the street. (So when he tells Logan that he knows his pain when it comes to public settings, hes not lying)

Blind Al is literally the reason deadpools suit is what it is. Why the idiot thought white was gonna be a good idea- See above. Unlike Al, who could smell the blood/ bleach.

I really love al. She's like the adult Toph.

"I hear everything in this duplex." OH, you poor thing.

"The guy that turned me into this freak-"

Al: *bitch im blind face*

As far as she's aware, he looks normal. Which is beautiful when you think about it, but it's funny when you think about the fact that he's so insecure about his face that he purposly found a blind room mate that couldn't judge him.

And they cuddle while he gets dating advice from grammie 🥹❤️

I really like how the entirety of Sister Margaret's School for Wayward Children (HellHouse in the comics) stood up for Weasel. They're murderers. But they're family.

What they did to vanessa was straight fucked. Her fiance up and leaves without notice, youre just trying to work and live your life, you get kidnapped.

Negasonic is so cool. I love them.

Dopinder (The cab guy) is so cool too. I love him too. Kill that guy in your trunk. "Mr. Pool" reminds me of Tom holland spiderman.

"It is not boy band >:(" Suurreee it isn't.

"Wheres your duffle bag?" You mean his dollar general store tree hello kitty book bag filled with guns?

"Cue the music" *no one even gives a fuck at this point when he talks to the imaginary cams*

Negasonic mid battle: Hold on- "Hey Yukio, yeah I just gotta fuck shit up real quick, ttyl?"

"Sure thing! <3 You go baby!"

I dont know anything about negasonic but she reminds me of Gambit with her energy powers.

Like I said. Hes smart when its a serious situation because he immediately threw his katana into the glass so vanessa could breathe, only to immediately turn sappy and childish again when he sees her stab francis with it. Heart hands, is hallucinating because theres a knife in his brain (literally), sex joke. Etc.

Colossus shut the fuck up. Let this man kill him. He's hurt Soooooo many people. A bullet costs less then a dollar. His amount of therapy alone is going to be like *checks calculations* 80 billion.

"Not the nethers" Wade can and often does show proof of hurting but hed rather cut off his hand then let vanessa punch him in the balls. "Ow- owie 5000"

Hello Hugh Jackman.

After not seeing each other for so longer they instantly go back to the fibbing. "I live in the house with 12"

"You live in a house??" Funny guys get the girls. I should know. My wife says im super funny (yes im in therapy)

Pinky promises really matter to him.

Hes such a silly billy he brought out the phone with their song on it. God what a romantic idiot.

[darcydarlingdabbles]

Tantalizing Television

RadioApple with a side dish of static - Hazbin Hotel

Explicit: Teasing, jealousy, Vox kinda gets cucked, secretly!est RadioApple, (switches/verses.)

4.5k

//Just so happens I was gonna do this anyway, now it's radioapple week. So it's meant to be right XD first time writing these characters and this ship...and I decided to make it harder on myself. Inspired by an IG Reel by akrcos. So naturally the song is Neon Medusa by The Midnight//

In one of the far wings of the Hazbin Hotel, a translucent form flickered to life in a plush red room. 

The hologram glimmered and Vox smack a hand into his screen. “C’mon ya piece of shit, work.” The overlord grunted, his projected body covered with blue static as it tried to stay solid. 

His flat eyes blinked, before his trademarked grin spread across his square face—Alastor’s dark hotel room finally becoming clear. And Vox was finally inside it.

Technically.

“Let’s see what the pompous ass is hiding.” 

Vox’s projection drifted forward, his half-corporal boots making no sound on the plush crimson carpet. His feet tangled in something on the floor—because he was still getting used to walking without feeling his footsteps—and because the place was a damn mess. 

“So much for a fastidious freak.” Vox snickered to himself, only to hiss out more garbled curses as he reached out to a dresser drawer. His translucent cyan fingers passed through the handle once, twice, before he focused on solidifying just enough to grasp it. 

Thinking he just might spare the projectionist demon who sold him this janky spell, Vox rummaged through the drawer. Looking for anything embarrassing—or juicy—to hold over Alastor’s head. 

Instead, his hand closed around something small and rubbery. 

Vox pulled out a bright yellow duck. 

“What the hell…?” He muttered, in utter confusion, as he uncovered an entire collection of rubber duckies.

The TV demon let out a grunt of frustration, squeezing one of the blasted things in his fist, making his hologram flicker as the toy let out a shrill little squeak. 

“Well well well, what do we have here?” A mocking lilt startled Vox, causing the duckie to go bouncing across the floor. It landed right at the high-heeled boots of the King of Hell himself. 

Lucifer was leaning casually against the four-poster bedframe, arms folded, and a devilishly smug grin on his lips. 

“Ah! Y-your Majesty!” Vox panicked, nearly backing into the dresser drawer he’d just opened. He’d been ready to kick some ass, now he had to prepare to kiss some.

Damn projectionist told him he was going to the room where Alastor spent the most time, not the archangel’s bedroom! 

“An Overlord reduced to snooping through drawers?” Lucifer clicked his tongue, his smile nearly as sharp as Alastor’s. “My my hell really has gone downhill with you guys in charge.” 

Vox felt his signal glitch with panic. 

“Now, I know you’re not stupid enough to try to sabotage my daughter’s hotel with me in it, right?” Lucifer took a few steps forward, and Vox wished his hologram could just vanish into the wall, but he was stuck until the spell ended. 

“No no no Your Highness, I’d never!” Vox said plaintiff, throwing a hands to play up his innocence. “I was just looking for Alastor, you know, old rivals. Messing with each other…ha ha.” 

The truth sounded like a lame excuse when he was saying it to Lucifer. 

“Trying to find him in my room is a little under the belt, don’t you think?” 

“Below the belt…you mean?”

“What did I say?”

“You said this was your room, sire?” Vox demanded, his flat screen head snapping around. “Fucking projectionist piece of shit.” 

The fallen angel’s yellow eyes narrowed on Vox’s form. “You’re using a projectionist, are ya?” Lucifer grinned. “Oh, that’s an old school trick—I with an old weakness.” The angel raised his hand, and snapped his fingers.

“Shit!”

Glowing golden ropes materialized, binding Vox’s projection from chest to ankles, before a flick of the blonde’s wrist sent him flying into the plush chair by the rumpled bed. 

Vox thrashed against his restraints, his shape lagging and distorting where the binds held him. But even his real demonic body would be nothing against pure angelic power. 

“Sir! I mean, I’m doing you a favor.” Vox protested, unable to help himself but trying to gab his way out. “The projectionist—he sent me where Alastor spends the most time in the hotel.”

Lucifer raised his eyebrows, his black lips suddenly pressed into a line—like a toddler with a secret. Vox was too busy pleading to notice. “You realize this means Alastor must have been spying on you, right? So so I’m letting you know! No need to get your feathers in a fluff!” 

“I decide when to fluff myself!” Lucifer snapped back, before making a face. “That sounded wrong, didn’t it?”

Vox opened his mouth, only to have it filled with static.

“Yes, darling, it did.” When a shadow stepped up from the half-lit room.

“Well now, Vox. You’ve gotten yourself into quite a conundrum, haven’t you?” The radio demon’s eyes burned with amusement and his sharp grin grew impossibly wider as he took in the scene. “Delightful to see you stooped so low as to rifle through my rival’s chambers.” 

“Hold the fuck up.” Vox’s screen flashed red. “You’re calling him your rival now?” 

Alastor and Lucifer glanced at each other, the angel’s face giving away more than the radio demon’s ever-present grin. 

Vox was too outraged to notice. “We’ve been at each other’s throats for fucking decades and suddenly this guy waltzes in!” He thrashed against his binds again. “And you’re making enemy goo-goo eyes at each other?!”

Alastor’s glee was practically luminescent. “My my, I did take you for the jealous type. But this, my good man, is a new low.” He leaned forward, arms folded neatly behind his back as the light of Vox’s screen glinted off teeth—and he twisted the knife in. “Though I hardly need to look to the king of hell to find a more interesting company than your static-filled nuisance.” 

“You smug son of a—” Vox leaned against his restraint, ready to bash his monitor into Alastor’s face—when the radio demon was suddenly a safe distance away. 

Lucifer stepped in front of Alastor and stuck a sharp heel squarely into the captive demon’s chest. The hologram flickered, but somehow held, tied in place by the divine rope lashed around him. 

“Watch your tone, buddy boy.” Lucifer gave a contemptuous sneer, about as much as his diminutive form could manage. 

“Now, now. Where are your manners, my friend?” Alastor chided, practically gleaming with sanctimoniousness. He loomed just behind the angel, his red-tipped fingers curling over Lucifer’s shoulders in a way that was almost…no, it couldn’t be. This was Alastor. And Vox knew damn well the radio demon didn’t invite contact. 

“I do adore it when you are ruthless, Your Majesty.” Alastor’s voice had gone smooth, almost purring. 

Vox’s screen flashed, like his circuits couldn’t compute an obvious flirtation from Alastor.

Even if Lucifer’s answering chuckle and the tilt of his head towards the smiling demon brought their faces closer than Vox had ever seen a living being get to his old nemesis. If they were still alive.

“Well now, Alastor, you old dog,” Vox taunted, seeing Alastor’s ears flick with irritation. “If I didn’t know ya better, I’d say ya needed the King of Hell to fight your battles for you now.” 

The radio demon straightened up, stiff as a rod, and Vox knew he’d dug under Alastor’s skin. Lucifer bore his heel further into Vox’s chest. If this projected body could bleed, he might be already. 

“As ever, Vox, I am more than capable of handling you myself.” His smile twitched. “But why get my hands dirty when I can watch the master at work?”

“He’s your master now, huh? Is the untouchable Alastor cozying up to the big boss down stairs?” Vox snapped.

Radio static burst through the room. Alastor answered to no one. And no one would imply otherwise. But, before he could put the demon in his place, the angel in front of him had to go blustering and bleeding heart.

“Listen here, you big piece of shit!” Lucifer glowered, his red pupils disappearing in a terrifying radiance. “Say anything like that again, and I will personally ensure that you spend the rest of eternity in Hell’s deepest, darkest, shittiest sewer. Got it flat face?” 

The angel yanked the captive demon forward, until his projected form was glitching all out of shape. Lucifer, the sweet fool he was, looked up at the smiling demon like a cat that had presented him with a half-dead mouse.

Unfortunately, Alastor loved cats. And dying things.

He had to regain control somehow. And that meant reigning in the devil himself. 

“You say the sweetest things when you’re threatening my enemies.” Alastor’s slender fingers gripped Lucifer’s face, curling deftly around the angel’s chin, and pulling the blonde’s gaze back to him. 

It worked like a charm, perhaps too well. 

Lucifer leaned into the touch, his cheeks impossibly redder, and his eyes fluttering closed for a moment. When he opened them again, they were filled with an emotion that even Alastor could not be prepared for. 

Leaving him unguarded for what happened next. 

Lucifer, the sweet fool that he was, surged forward to kiss Alastor. Right in front of a gaping Vox. 

The radio demon should be livid. He made it clear their personal lives were not for public consumption—in any form.

Only for the petite archangel to hold nothing back in his gaze every time their eyes met.

So, why was Alastor melting into the press of lips, regardless of who was watching? 

A shiver ran down Alastor’s spine, taken in by the fierce protectiveness in that kiss. Misguided, clumsy, foolhardy, and vowed to shield him from harm with everything he had.

Which would be just lovely, if Alastor didn’t have to consider the crumbling reputation he’d just glued back together.

But, when his red eyes found Vox, already wearing a brilliant smile like he meant to expose this level of affection all along—he saw something he should have expected. 

The television demon’s eyes widened in shock, circuits buzzing with disbelief. His screen went blank like he’d overload, until the color blocked test pattern displayed the words ‘please stand by.’ Like his entire system had to reboot. 

He’d stunned the picture box—and that, the radio demon could work with.

“What the fuck, Alastor?” Vox crackled, outrage written over his features. “You don’t like being touched! Isn’t that your whole damn shtick?”

Crimson eyes slid to Vox with barely concealed loathing. Alastor tutted, lips curling in a mocking sneer. Soaking in that glorious, irrational, jealousy.

“Oh, I don’t.” Alastor said simply, turning a softer smile to Lucifer, knowing the Overlord was watching with wrapt attention. “Not by just anyone, and particularly not by you, Vox.” 

Vox’s screen fritzed again, eyes flashing with fury. 

“Oh-ho, I know that green-eyed monster when I see it~” Lucifer taunted in a sing-song voice. His hand tightened around Alastor’s waist. 

“This all started with your silly little obsession, did it not?” Alastor mused with a dark chuckle. And the radio demon, utterly amused with this revelation from his rival, leaned in to the assumption. “When did you realize your propositions to have me on your team turned into utterly pathetic advances?”

“Cocky fucking bastard!” Vox’s voice distorted and crackled. “Don’t act so high and mighty! You just found a higher power to whore yourself out to!” The Vox hologram rocked violently against its bindings, wild with jealous rage, somehow even more deranged and unhinged without a corporeal form to ground it.

Static burst throughout the room, lights flickering and shadows distorting. As Alastor’s smile stayed perfectly in place. 

The radio demon leaned forward, teeth glinting with pure malice as he tapped his microphone against Vox’s screen, making the cyan distortion appear again.

“If you think it wise to spread gossip about me, by way of blackmailing Our King…on your head, be it.” He said in a sadistic purr. “No one will believe a thing you saw here.” 

Over his shoulder, he felt his shadows banished. Lucifer had his back with a flash of divine light and power. 

And nothing felt better than rubbing salt into Vox’s wounded ego.

Alastor reached out a clawed hand, pressing the tip of a nail into the hologram’s chest. The projection wavered and warped under his touch, but still provided a just hint of resistance. 

“Then again, this isn’t really you, is it?”

He felt Lucifer’s hand tighten at his waist. “It’s a hell projection dear, “ he explained, his voice amused. “Meant to torture sinners by allowing them to touch, but never be touched in return.” 

“Oh.” Alastor’s ears perked up. “How inspiringly cruel.” 

He straightened up, shooting Lucifer a wicked smile, before he grabbed the shorter man by the lapels, and shoved the angel back into Vox’s lap. 

Both men appeared completely taken aback.

Vox’s screen glitched between showing his two-dimensional eyes wide with excitement and indignation.

“Al, you sure about this?” Lucifer’s face was painted with the same shock, but with a bit of delight curling his lips. Wondering if the radio demon was serious. 

Alastor caught his eye with a smirk. His long nimble fingers making quick work of the buttons, revealing the scarlet dress shirt and black suspenders underneath—shedding his coat entirely and tossing it onto the bed. 

Vox had never seen Alastor in a scrap less of clothing before, and those slim shoulders and narrow waist made something hot and hungry twist in his gut. 

Lucifer was already reaching for the demon, knowing this was the signal that his partner wanted to be handled. 

  Alastor moved to straddle the King of Hell with his long legs, caging his rival overlord as well, while he captured the angel’s mouth in a searing kiss. 

Lucifer groaned against his lips. 

“I can still fucking see you sick perverts!” Vox snarled, face burning with humiliated fury. 

Vox was having a conniption. Since when did Alastor let anyone touch him, let alone paw at him and his immaculate clothes? But here the radio demon was, sitting astride Lucifer’s lap, and kissing him like he wanted to devour him. 

Alastor tsked, wagging a chiding finger as he nuzzled against Lucifer’s cheek with a rumbling purr. 

Vox watched Lucifer’s hand slide down the demon’s waist, gripping his hips to pull him in even closer.

Alastor’s low chuckle met the gesture, that clawed hand grabbing the chair behind the other demon’s head. As he lifted his hips and rolled them against Lucifer’s. 

Through his eyelids, Alastor could see Vox’s screen flashing and flickering, a sound of disgust—and abject envy hitting the deer demon’s ears. 

Though his delight at Vox’s outrage was shriveling in comparison to the familiar delight of Lucifer’s hands on him. He’d never wanted for touch, never felt so starved without it, until the first time he’d felt the angel’s lips on his own. Now, he was always famished.

“Get off me, you sick fucks!” Vox snarled, struggling against his bonds as he tried to buck them off.

With a sharp intake of breath, Lucifer pulled away from the kiss. A sly grin played on his lips as he cast a fleeting glance at the flat screen mounted behind him. “Voxy might not really be here.” he purred, his hands sliding up along Alastor’s torso, hooking into the black suspenders he wore, and the demon let himself be pulled forward. Just to see the TV glitch. “But I can feel him getting hard.” 

The television behind Lucifer flashed a brilliant, blushing red and Alastor laughed at this tantalizing little tidbit. 

He leaned in, his forehead pressed to the angel’s as he murmured. “What a shame I cannot be recorded…” he taunted, his lips drawn over the angels with pure want and sweetness that he gave to no one else. “I suppose you shall have to commit it to memory.” 

“Fuck you both,” Vox growled, his projection flickering with impotent rage. Practically frothing at the mouth. Because beneath the anger and the jealousy—was the shameful desire. The longing to be touched and wanted by Alastor the way Lucifer was. 

“Oh, you wish chatter box.” The angel snorted, only to have the radio demon’s claws pull his attention back. 

“No, I—” Vox couldn’t even get the protest out of his mouth. It was…he couldn’t be jealous of Lucifer? Or Alastor…Or…both. 

He didn’t know anymore, and that was the greatest torture of all. 

The two seemed too lost in each other to give much of a damn about him. 

“Darling~” Alastor purred, moving to stand with as much grace as he could manage in this state. Causing two breaths to hitch. “I think…we need some privacy. Don’t you?”

“Mm, couldn’t agree more.” Lucifer’s eyes sparkled as he stood and ran his hands up Alastor’s chest, finding his tie and undoing it with deft fingers. Before pulling his collar to bring him back nose to nose. “I want you all to myself.” 

A full-body shudder rippled through the lean demon at the intimate words and touch. They’d been playing a game of teasing, hardly doing anything more heavy than petting—but it seemed Lucifer was ready for more than just a little light handling. 

The angel’s fingers slipped into Alastor’s hair, tilting his head back and leaving a searing trail down his neck, popping open the collar of his shirt in his wake. 

Exposing more of his skin than Alastor intended. 

“P-Perhaps we shouldn’t give our...captive audience too much of a peep show,” Alastor managed, static crackling around the words. 

Lucifer pulled back, reading something through Alastor’s stiff smile. “Oh, Al—!”

The demon pressed his pointed fingers to the angel’s lips, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. Clumsy as ever, but affectionately honest. And Alastor wanted to kiss the apology off of his lips.

“You can’t just leave me here!” Vox’s screen flickered and glitched, his useless hands clenching at his side. “While you go off and—”

Vox couldn’t even finish the thought, his mind rebelling at the images that flashed before his eyes. Alastor and Lucifer, tangled together in the sheets, their bodies moving as one. Alastor’s head thrown back in ecstasy, Lucifer’s name falling from his lips like a prayer.

The real men in front of them were leaning into each other again, like they couldn’t surface from each other long enough to care that Vox was here. 

Alastor nipped at Lucifer’s ear, voice dropping to a conspiratorial murmur only they could hear. A thrilled laugh spilled from the fallen angel at whatever filthy suggestion was offered.

“You’re a singularly wicked thing,” he praised, squeezing Alastor’s hip meaningfully. “Wouldn’t dream of denying you.”

With a casual flick of one hand, the glowing angelic bindings holding Vox constricted suddenly, forcing his projection into an awkward, hunched position on the chair. 

Alastor smirked at the muffled noise of frustration.

Alastor sauntered over to where Vox’s bound projection fought against its ethereal bonds. He tsked in mock disappointment, crouching down to meet those twinkling electronic eyes, seeing how they darted to the open collar of his shirt. 

And how the rope criss-crossed his screen, gagging Vox at last. 

“Such unbecoming behavior from an esteemed colleague,” he chided, all velvet and menace. “Though I can’t say I’m surprised—you were always dreadfully uncouth.”

Vox’s screen flashed furiously, the test pattern barely holding. Alastor watched the frantic display with undisguised relish.

“No witty comebacks? No desperate pleas?” He feigned a pout. “Disappointing. Then again, you always are.” 

Straightening, Alastor’s microphone staff materialized in one hand with a crackle of static. He gave it an experimental twirl, grinning madly.

“It’s just a shame you won’t be able to feel yourself burning in the lake of fire.” With an oddly graceful sweep of the staff, a swirling vortex sparked to life at their feet—a hellish portal yawning open. Searing brimstone fumes billowed forth, carrying the roar of raging flames. 

“Do enjoy the sight of your flesh melting though, ta-ta!” Alastor gave a teasing wave as Vox’s projection was lashed with his shadow tentacles, and dragged into the fiery pit itself. 

Lucifer watched the whole display with rapt amusement from the bed, crimson eyes glittering. As Alastor turned back towards him, snapping away the vortex with a casual flick, the fallen angel reclined with unabashed hunger written across his handsome features.

“I do love it when you do you evil, Al.” The angel grinned, popping onto his boots. “It’s hot as hell.” 

Alastor rolled his eyes at the terrible pun, but couldn’t help the little laugh that escaped him. The man wore his heart on his sleeve to an embarrassing extent. 

What made Alastor find it so inexplicably pleasing?

“Then you must be perpetually hot and bothered. Sounds like a terrible state of affairs to be in.”

“Not one you can relate to, huh?” Lucifer grinned, wrapping his arms around Alastor’s tapered waist.

The taller demon ducked, smirking only broader when he stayed just out of the reach of the Lucifer’s lips, to the King’s visible frustration. 

“I may relate, as of late.” 

That was all the shorter man needed to reach up and grab Alastor in for another kiss. 

“I can help with that.” Lucifer offered sweetly, pointed fingers curling into the radio demon’s hair to demand a deeper kiss.

Lucifer, with a level of gracelessness that was miraculous for an angel, pushed Alastor back onto his rumpled bed.

The slender radio demon's body relaxed into the mattress, his long legs splayed indignantly—so he thought. Though there was no hint of mirth in his lover’s yellow eyes.

Lucifer was already on top of him, forked tongue sliding past his lips with desperate need.

Alastor felt Lucifer's sharp teeth glided along his jaw, marking a trail of small kisses down his length of neck.“Impatient, are we?” Alastor attempted a tease, but his ever-practiced voice faulter under the angel’s undaunted enthusiasm.

“Oh, honey. I know how getting one over on someone gets you going.” He lifted his head, only to waggle those damn eyebrows. “Do you want me to slow down?”

Lesiurely, Lucifer made a scorching path down the demon’s chest and torso, pushing apart his blood red shirt inch by inch.

“Fuck you.” Alastor gripped at his golden blonde hair, trying to shove his head down further.

Lucifer resisted the force like a tiger swatted by a house cat—sending another thrill down the demon’s spine.

The angel was pausing to swirl his tongue into the grooved indents of lean muscle and hipbones. Lucifer’s clever mouth worked lower still—until finally he freed Alastor’s hard cock and enveloped him in the welcoming heat of the angel’s mouth.

The radio demon arched up from the bed with a strangled cry of static, clawing at the crimson sheets as Lucifer’s mischievous skills swiftly robbed him of breath and higher cognition. Alastor’s legs fell open wider as debauched sounds hissed from between his teeth. 

Lucifer hummed his approval around his mouthful, that damned tongue of his flicking ceaslessly as he sucked Alastor down.

The demon was already trembling under him. Too damn easily.

Only when Alastor’s sounds reached a true crescendo of desperation did Lucifer finally pull back with a filthy pop.

“My, my...it seems the great Alastor turns quite tame with just a little bit of attention,” Lucifer purred, sinuously licking his lips clean.

“Consider yourself fortunate that pride flatters you, darling.” Alastor snarled hoarsely, eyes burning crimson and fangs bared as radio noise crackled around him.

With a snap of Alastor fingers, their clothes vanished, only to appear folded neatly on the nearby chair.

Lucifer quirked a brow as Alastor reached down to hastily prep himself. The radio demon’s long fingers deftly worked, slicking himself with conjured lubricant.

“Don’t keep me waiting,” Alastor growled out the demand. 

Lucifer’s grin stretched wider, all too eager to oblige.

He surged up to capture that snarling mouth in a hungry, devouring kiss. Pinning Alastor’s wiry body back against the bed, careful to align perfectly with the demon’s entrance—before snapping forward in a brutal thrust.

Alastor threw his head back with a guttural groan of blissful torment.

Static discharged in a blistering wave, scattering signals and causing lights to flicker in their room. The radio demon’s slender fingers scrabbled for purchase, digging into Lucifer’s back as his legs wrapped vice-tight around the angel’s powerful body.

Lucifer leaned in close, to the constant rumble coming from the demon’s stretched lips.

“Growl for me all you like, my dear,” he purred darkly. “I know exactly what you need.”

Lucifer set a punishing pace—plunging into Alastor’s willing warmth over and over.

The demon keened brazenly beneath him. Clinging with a desperation that belied centuries of scheming and solitude, finally crumbling to primal need.

Their power swirled and clashed in wild waves.

Alastor’s shadows swirled and snarled, his eyes burning bright in the room's dark as he fought to keep them open, his teeth gnashed together.

Lucifer’s vast angelic grace responded—six resplendent wings unfurling in stark juxtaposition—keeping Alastor’s demonic power in eclipsed beneath him.

The angel groaned deep in his chest at that exquisite sight his tightly buttoned partner made when he finaly let go. He drank it in with reverence.

And that undeniable dominant power shattered the last strand of Alastor’s restraint.

He came with a harsh cry, clenching to the angel’s cock as he came. Making a mess of them both, knowing that was exactly what Lucifer wanted before he was spent inside Alastor.

Lucifer panted harshly, sweat beading his brow as the pleasure rolled through him.

For long moments, they simply clung together, chests heaving and hearts pounding violently.

Lucifer nuzzled into the crook of Alastor’s neck, relishing their closeness, the scent and taste of his lover’s bliss. He felt utterly sated, lethargic in the most delicious way.

Alastor panted still, almost silently, arm thrown over his face as he attempted to compose himself. Hiding his mouth as he drew ragged breaths.

But when at last Lucifer made to pull away, shadowy tendrils lashed around his waist, refusing to let him go.

Alastor whimpered faintly as he drew the fallen angel back down atop him, long limbs winding around Lucifer to keep him nestled close.

The blonde chuckled, the sound warm with fond amusement as he happily settled in the circle of Alastor’s embrace.

Trailing reverent touches along those deceptively delicate features, he murmured, “My sweet little deer demon...”

A ragged growl vibrated low in Alastor’s chest at the endearment. But there was no real threat behind it as he clung to Lucifer—soaking up every caress, every brush of affection in still, sated bliss.

When Lucifer’s fingers carded through his disheveled hair, he even leaned subtly into the intimate touch like a cat being stroked.

“Hush now,” Lucifer purred, placing a soft kiss to Alastor’s brow. “Let me take care of you...”

Alastor’s only response was a halfhearted grumble as he tucked his face into the curve of Lucifer’s neck, content to let the former archangel dote on him.

Just for now.

[jeanie-g]

86 and JackNico please!

so, my actual #86 was lame so i did 8+6 instead! Gave me much more to work with lol. um, this is very nsfw btw.....i mean, it's a song about masturbation, what do you expect.

[#14] Guilty as Sin? (Taylor Swift)

My bedsheets are ablaze, I've screamed his name / Building up like waves crashing over my grave / Without ever touching his skin / How can I be guilty as sin?

• It started as a fluke. Jack, a hand on himself, almost there but not quite, needing just a little more to push him over the edge. Out of nowhere, Nico popped into his head, and in an out-of-character fit of horny desperation, Jack pictured his hand being the one jerking him off. It only took three more strokes before he finished, a whimper nearly leaving his lips. When Jack came back to himself, he stood and stared at the shower wall for three whole minutes, his fingers pruning up under the spray of the water.

• Afterwards, he wrote it off as a weird, one-off accident. He was already close; he could've thought of a Gatorade bottle and still have his brain tint it in some nonsensical, sexed up light. Nico only popped up because they were supposed to go for bagels in an hour. (And if Jack looked away when Nico spread his cream cheese, that was unrelated.)

• When it happened a second time, Jack was drunk, so obviously it didn't count. He'd had this weird, anxious energy all night, and when he stumbled into his bedroom at home, was so unexplainably horny that he had to jerk off immediately.

• As he put a hand on himself, he closed his eyes, flipping through various mental images to act as aids. He'd danced with a hot blonde at the club, and his mind drifted to the feel of her hips under his hands, the hotness of her breath when she whispered into his ear.

• It didn't take long for the images to change, though, because right beside the girl was Nico, dancing with her brunette friend. His tee shirt stuck to his back, sticky with sweat and beer, and his styled hair was becoming loose from the humidity. He was smiling so wide, Jack remembered. His hand was on the brunette's ass.

• And like his mind was running out from under him, suddenly it was Jack in the brunette's place—Nico squeezing his hip and draping an arm on his shoulder. Jack could picture it so clearly, and as his hand sped up, he could feel that familiar coil tighten in his gut.

• Distantly, he heard his brain scream, What are you doing? That's Nico! but it felt too good for Jack to care. The fantasy played on, and right when Nico ducked to capture Jack's lips, Jack snapped his eyes open and came all over his belly.

• (And when he woke up the next morning, hungover and ashamed, he blamed the alcohol and didn't jerk off for a week and a half.)

• But what's that thing people say about the rule of 3? This time it was in Carolina, Jack spent (and very much sober) after an 8-2 loss to the Canes. He was frustrated—with himself, with the refs, with the team. They weren't together out there, and with every loss, Jack had to stop himself from mentally tallying how many points they needed to still make playoffs.

• He needed a distraction. He tried watching whatever was playing on TV, but every show or movie annoyed him. He scrolled on his phone for a while, but messages from friends and family commiserating the loss made his attitude sour even further. He even tried to go to sleep early, but he was too restless.

• So, really, it was only as a means of calming himself down that he brought his knees up and stuck a hand down his pants. With his free hand, he picked his phone back up (now on Do Not Disturb) and opened PornHub. Some of the thumbnails alone had him chubbing up, but nothing was scratching that itch that Jack felt creeping along his bones. Until he saw one that made his stomach swirl and his toes scrunch up.

• It was a video of two young men, the taller one draped over the shorter's back as he penetrated him. And—Jack had watched gay porn before. He was curious if nothing else, but he rarely indulged himself. Right now, though, it's like his head was filled with static as he selected it and pressed play. And as he watched, the taller one's head popped into view, and—

• He had black hair and a mustache, and dimples when he smiled. It wasn't Nico (because of course it wasn't) but the resemblance was enough to get Jack's heart pounding in his chest. And because he always had to self-sabatoge, he immediately imagined what Nico would be like in bed. If he'd be the one on top, manhandling whoever was below him, and pounding into them so hard the bed frame shook.

• Because Nico pulled; he never made a show of it, but he never hid it either. It always made Jack's skin simmer in a way he could never identify. And it was simmering in a different way now, Jack bucking his hips to fuck his own fist as he let himself imagine it while he watched—Nico fucking that brunette from the club, or that redhead from Dallas with the big tits.

• But it wasn't a girl the guy was fucking in the video. It was another guy. And like clockwork, the fantasy morphed until it was Jack who was under Nico, taking him shamelessly, panting while Nico muttered sweet nothings into his ear and lit him up from the inside out.

• "Nico, fuck," Jack whispered, fist flying, tears welling up in his eyes. "Shit."

• The video man's hips stuttered to a stop, and with a groan, the other man finished, too. Jack wondered what noises Nico made when he went over the edge, and then Jack was coming so hard his ears rang.

• It took almost a minute for Jack to catch his breath. The video ended with a freeze frame of the bottom's chest glazed with sweat and come, and Jack slowly put down his phone. He lied back and stared at the ceiling, post-nut clarity hitting him hard. He just jerked off to the thought of his teammate—his captain—fucking him. That couldn't be good, right?

• Jack felt his phone vibrate, and picked it up to check.

• Nico: Can't sleep. Wanna watch a movie?

• Jack let the phone drop to his chest. If this was some sort of cosmic punishment, Jack thought that maybe he deserved it.

[waywardangel-wilds]

Sharing more unfinished drafts woohoo!!

In other news for anyone who’s into my silly little corporate office working Katniss / HR rep Peeta ficlet —> it will be moving to ao3 once it has complete chapters. Here’s some more! Let’s call this part 3:

“—so if you want, I can give you his number, I know he’s only twenty but—“

“Oh my fucking god,” I dropped low to the ground at the sight, my heart very much falling to my ass. “Rue! Get down here!”

“What? Are you even listening to me? This is child neglect, you know.”

“Shut up! Duck!” I yanked her down to my level, huddling behind a stiff cardboard cutout of Robert Pattinson. A teenaged couple walking by took a very important moment out of their date to stare at us.

“Why are we hiding?” Rue whispered to me, pushing her face close to my own and covering me in the shea butter I put in her hair. “Is it your mom?”

“Shh! No, it’s just some guy from work.” I pointed. “See?”

“Katniss! Why are you so weird? Let’s just go say hi!” Rue went to bounce up but I yanked her right back. An elderly woman caught my eye and tsked.

“No! No! Oh god, can’t you see he’s on a date? How lame would it be for us to interrupt right now? I’m literally hanging out with a random twelve year old.”

Rue reared back from me with a hurt expression and I immediately felt awful.

“No! That isn’t what I meant! It’s just, listen, in adult world I’m kind of a loser, okay? And that has nothing to do with you! Just—“

“Katniss?” My heart sunk. Peeta had spotted us. “Is that you? Are you okay? Why are you on the floor?”

Link to part 2

Link to part 1

[sunny-lounge]

We got matching Christmas sweaters. (Ch. 2/2)

Relationship: Sami/Jey (SamiJey)

Rating: Teen — feelings and emotions, fluff, Christmas, a kiss, fun and silly, ugly Christmas sweaters, slight possessive feelings, established relationship, secret relationship, relationship reveal, family

Summary: Jey and Sami have matching ugly Christmas sweaters, it's a secret. Until it's not. Ch. 1 - how Jey and Sami got their matching sweaters Ch. 2 - how the others found out.

Word count: 2,667

Ch. 1 here.Ao3 link - Ch. 2 / *Other Fics*

A/N: I said I'd write something lighter this time so here it is, and I wanted to try something different. I didn't have a lot of time to write this because I wanted to get it out before Christmas. But hey, even if one person out there enjoys it!! 🥰 HERE’S PART 2!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!✨❄️🎄🎁🎅🏻🎉☃️✨ I hope you enjoy this! 🌸🌺

[— I'm not a "writer" —SO...Comments/Feedback would genuinely be appreciated. Obviously I'd really like to know if you enjoyed it - and comments are so wonderful and so motivating as well! 🩷 hit the like if you genuinely like it 😊 I'd love to know if it was any good. Thank you again for reading! 🩷]

Tagging: @afterdarkprincess @fantasyismyonlyrealescape @imabillyami - (if at all anyone wants to be tagged in my silly little fics let me know!)

——

He knows he's being ridiculous. The others won't care right? Maybe they won't even notice that it's part of a set, after all, Sami isn't scheduled to come in today. So Jey's confident he can get away with this.

And, really where would Sami even wear his 'Christmas' sweater, he doesn't actually celebrate the occasion...Jey thinks they're safe.

Walking into the locker room dropping his bag down Jey spots Jimmy immediately, grinning at his older twin. It's hard not to, Jimmy's always had that ability to make him smile, big smile, always been able to no matter what else is going on around them, no matter how bad or how chaotic, Jimmy always puts a smile on his face without even trying, seeing his face is enough to.

Jimmy's wearing a holly-green sweater that's looking extra soft and fluffy. At the top, "BITE ME!"— shiny silver sequins bordering it's glittering red letters, a large gingerbread man cookie dancing at the midsection one leg up in the air twirling, complete with a glitter candy cane in its hand being swung around, icing embroidery outlining its features, and the most gaudy obnoxious looking pompom buttons known to man going down its front. It looked like someone had thrown up a mix of different colored glitter in random patches all over the remaining parts of his sweater.

All in all it is hideous. His brother Jimmy has hit the brief of "ugly" Christmas sweater to perfection, he's understood the assignment and executed it to the highest standard. Jey is not one bit surprised...that Jimmy excelled at this.

“Ain't you all 'sweeet'  lookin' today, Uce,” croons Jey, leaning in with a smirk. Jimmy just grins at him like he's pleased with himself, throwing a candy cane at his head, which he manages to duck last minute.

“You so lame, Uce. 'Sweeeeet'!?  Really? This early with them lame ass puns?" huffs out Jimmy, laughing. "But, I am lookin' damn 'sweeeeet' aren't I?" he smirks, wriggling his eyebrows.

"I'm jus' learnin' from the best, Uce," quips Jey, shooting him a toothy smile. "Yea, you just soo...sweeeeet lookin', Uce, my teeth all gon' fall out."

He can see Jimmy gearing up to reply, but before he can, Solo's walking around the corner and giving Jey a stoic once-over. “Nice,” he nods, and continues on his way. 'Well, if that isn't the highest compliment coming from Solo..,'  thinks Jey. He's glad once again that he changed his mind and chose to wear this sweater.

The Wiseman already seated to his right is dressed in a purple sweater with a spectacular looking golden menorah on its front, orange flamed white candles resting in it, and immaculately detailed tiny multi-colored dreidels delicately embroidered all around the hem and ends off his sleeve. Classy.

“Wiseman! Lookin' good!” says Jey, a little too loudly, sue him, he's a little surprised with the holiday spirit and enthusiasm being shown, as he himself is feeling it. Seems like everyone's getting into it, he'd forgotten the Wiseman was Jewish.

Looks like Jimmy was right after all, he really is starting to feel an extra sense of camaraderie and togetherness already.

“Figured I'd join you rather than fight it," says the Wiseman, with a shrug, "I knew I was out numbered...,” trailing off, sighing. Looking and sounding down and defeated, if not for the slight smirk gracing his lips.

Always a sly low-key shit-stirrer...but that's what made him so unique, that's what makes him the 'Wiseman'— One minute he's showing off his brilliant and intellectual mind, the next he's strategically taking down their opponents with his hidden expertise. But, on the other hand, he's also cleverly busting your balls, and half the time you don't realize it till it's too late. They appreciate this side of him too, it's one of the reasons they all got on so well.

Solo's sweater is more subdued, a dark deep red with little white snowflakes embroidered around the collar, the midsection, hem and his cuffs, little shiny threaded brightly colored hollies in-between them. So Jey makes it a point to tell Solo, "You look nice too, Uce."

Solo's made the effort and that matters, and Jey wants to let him know it, it shows that Solo still underneath it all wants to be a part of the "family", to somehow even fit-in, in his own way, even if he sometimes acts otherwise.

"He does, don' he, Uce," adds Jimmy, cheesing at them from the other side. "You look nice, dawg!"

And of course, Solo responds with his single stoic nod, because that's what Solo does. And, it's the best they'll get from him, but they're used to it. And, it's okay, because that's their baby brother.

Just then the door opens and in walks Roman, announcing Sami will be dropping by soon to go over their tag team match together; it's unexpected, but he's excited to see Sami, just like he always is and he silently wonders if this feeling will ever fade. It's like he's perpetually living in the 'honeymoon' phase of theirs, just over and over, on and on, never completely escaping. Ever since, well, ever since the beginning, really. So, he's looking forward to seeing his boyfriend especially when they'd thought they would be spending today apart.

They've been in plenty of work situations since they've become boyfriends, and nothing's changed. Jey isn't worried about that.

'Boyfriends' it still feels weird saying it because it's such a foreign concept to Jey. And he's not sure, if he'll ever get used to the swarm of butterflies he feels that comes along with it. His stomach in chaos every single time, another occurrence that's completely foreign to him, every single time making it fluttering like crazy when he realizes that Sami is now—his boyfriend.

It hasn't caused any trouble yet, both of them being able to remain professional. Even though he's finding it harder and harder to stop himself from jumping Sami, and trapping those sweet pink soft delicious kissable...damn..he could go on...lips between his whenever he sees them, like they were always demanding to be taken—and really, he'd just be taking what's now his. The possessive bastard that he is, constantly wanting to come out and play whenever Sami is around. Something else he's never experienced, this constant need and want for someone, for them to be his and only his in every way, never until Sami.

“Told Sami we're wearin' Christmas sweaters, so he don't feel like a damn fool when he shows up,” shares Roman, walking past. And amused murmurs of agreement rise, from Jimmy and the Wiseman, waiting to see what the 'honorary Uce' will turn up in.

Roman himself is wearing a sweater that's a rich royal deep red, almost bordering on maroon, tight and fitting, an intricate extremely detailed golden snowflake carefully woven with fancy shimmery gold thread featuring right in the center, tiny white and silver snowflakes scattered around, the illusion of snow falling from the sky. Completing out the look of a magical, royal and regal Christmas—just like Roman.

So far, it looks like it's three for three. Three very decent, nice, and put together Christmas sweaters worn by Solo, the Wiseman and Roman. And, three 'ugly' Christmas sweaters worn by, Jimmy, himself and...

And, then it hits Jey. Now he's a little worried, because he knows Sami only owns one Christmas sweater—the one that matches Jey. The one he's currently wearing.

Jey is quickly running through his options, his escape plan, his excuse...

He's hoping maybe he'll get called out, by management or the crew for something that needs to be taken care of. Or, he can pretend he is sick. Maybe, pretend this is all just a big coincidence, and they just happened to have matching sweaters, he's fairly sure no one's going to buy that though. Or, he could just take his sweater off.

And, none of which would solve anything because everyone's already seen the sweater. At the very best he'll be able to avoid their reactions for a while, but what's the point, he's going to have to face them eventually and avoiding it will only make them rib him even harder. And, he can't find it in himself to leave Sami all on his own to face these bunch of brutes he calls family.

As though fate has been listening in on his lamenting, his inner dread, it is at that precise moment that Sami casually strides into the locker room.

Jimmy notices first, guffawing out a high bubble of laugher. “Jey, you and Sami matchin'! Man, I thought you 'n me was twins, dayoneish!”

Jey can't really focus on Jimmy, shifting his gaze a little, away from his twin now training it on Sami, wearing the matching set of their pair of sweaters. Sami just gives him a sheepish rueful smile in return, messily running his fingers through his hair, a nervous gesture of his. Shrugging, with a 'it is what it is and I'm going to run with it' motion.

Jey is stuck for a second, not knowing what to say or how to react, but he doesn't need to.

“I’m surprised by your taste, Jey. Nice ugly sweater you're wearing by the way,” grins Sami, with a wink, smirking like nothing's wrong at all.

'That smug cocky red-headed menace,'' thinks Jey, adoringly, still unable to say anything helpful as he hears Jimmy let out another bout of laughter, watching Sami heading towards Roman waiting on the other side.

Jey stealthy grabs his phone typing out a quick message to his boyfriend.

- - 'Shit. I don' know if I wanna punch you right now or kiss that damn smirk off your face. You enjoyin' this too much Sami...'

He watches as Sami, still listening to Roman going through all the possible scenarios of their match and how to strategically counter them, read the message. Sami's eyes widen just the slightest, you can barely notice it, almost like Jey is seeing things, eyebrows rising just a touch, again not noticeable unless you're really looking. He sees Sami's tapping out a reply, face blank again still appearing unbothered and nonchalant as ever to everyone around.

But, Jey knows him better than that, he can see Sami's body barely keeping from reacting, coiling tense in anticipation, something simmering at the surface.

- - 'Then do it, Jey. I’m game if you are.'

Jey's staring at the message, he stares and stares, dumbfounded mildly disbelieving what he's reading. Is Sami joking? So he looks up again and almost flinches, Sami is looking right at him, dead in the eyes with a seriousness so intense that it sends a shiver straight down his spine.

He didn't think Sami would ever go in for such a bold move, he'd have thought if it had been one of them suggesting it, it'd have been him—suggesting this, to kiss in front of everyone, in the middle of the locker room...but Jey can't deny that he really wants to. He wants his family to know how happy he is, he wants everyone to know just how lucky and complete he is, and he wants to share this. He wants to show Sami off. And, it looks like Sami wants to do the same.

Roman and Sami seem to have finished discussing their move for their upcoming match, vaguely hearing Sami agreeing with the plan they've come up with. And, they say their goodbyes. Sami says his goodbyes to the rest of them as well, each in their own unique way, a handshake, a hug, a nod, or a combination.

And as Sami turns to leave, Jey calls out for him. “Hey, Sami?”

Sami turns around with a questioning look on his face.

Jey ignores it stepping forward, wrapping his large hand around Sami's shoulder holding him in place, softly sliding it up the back of his warm slender neck, and slowly pulling him in and kissing him—open-mouthed, long and hard, possessive and hungry, licking right into his mouth chasing the taste of him. He's putting on a show, claiming Sami in front of them, marking him as his.

Jey can feel Sami's sweet grin of acceptance and complete surrender under his lips, mapping it out with his own, and he's sure Sami can feel him smirking right back, he hears his twin whooping and wolf-whistling in the background, and he's pulling away with a laugh, huffing out a little breath.

Resting his forehead against Sami's, they're breathing a little hard, Sami with his eyes closed and Jey with his open. Sami savoring the moment the still phantom feel and taste of Jey on his lips, while Jey is savoring Sami taking in the beautiful blissed out man before him.

They probably didn't need to kiss for that long or with so much intensity. But, now there isn't a single doubt in anyone's mind as to who Sami really belongs to. He might be part of the Bloodline, but he's Jey's.

And, there's a pleasant prickling, a tingling against his skin at the thought of it. He knows he's become a possessive bastard, and now his family knows it too. He's just made it very clear, there's no doubt in anyone's mind. Sami belongs to him. He belongs to Sami.

He keeps looking at Sami and he wants to taste those reddened plumped up swollen lips in front of him once again, in front of everyone once again, the ones that he caused to look that way.

"We still on for tonight?” asks Jey, going for casual, acting like the last few minutes didn't just happen.

Sami just grins at him all teeth, dopey looking fully gone on Jey, with that twinkle in his hazel eyes that's so distinctly Sami, the one that Jey can't ever look away from. “Of course, Jey.”

Sami ducks his head a shy smile now gracing his kissed-out lips, face still flushed still looking slightly dazed as he leaves, making an obviously quick escape while he can, in these precious last few moments of silence when he has the chance to.

Jey slowly turns back to his family and catches Solo passing Jimmy a $50 note. Roman and the Wiseman solemnly doing the same. He hears Roman distinctly mumble something like 'He couldn't have waited another week?'

“You knew?” Jey asks Jimmy, as casually as he can.

He's surprised, but he's also really not to be honest, more like a little affronted if anything, he could never really hide anything from Jimmy—his twin, the one person who sometimes knows him better than he knows himself, knows his own thoughts even before he does, his own feelings even before he can comprehend them, his dayoneish.

“Course, Uce! You know you ain't hiddin' nothin' from me. Don' know why you even think to try. 'Sides we be blind not seein' it,” says Jimmy, rolling his eyes grinning, and Solo is doing his stoic nod in agreement next to him.

He looks to the others, at Roman and the Wiseman and they too are giving Jey the 'you really think we didn't know? Do we look blind and stupid to you?—that's sad...' look.

Jey just shakes his head not knowing whether to feel a little put out by the whole thing or rightfully elated by their reactions, and sits back flopping down. All the tension and anticipation leaving him, his body loosening up and relaxing. They finally did it. He and Sami had done it, and the world hadn't ended, Sami had been right all along, Jey had just been over thinking it all.

Jimmy is still giving him that stupidly large and wide grin of his, and for all it's worth Jey can't help but return it in equal measure.

His attention turns to the pinging of his phone and he scoops it out of his pocket opening it.

- - 'I love you.'

Another ping rings.

- - 'I've got dessert waiting for you 😏'

——

Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed it! 🩷

[mjonthetrack]

Grown Up 4

Camille was so grateful for the added week

Paul so kindly allotted when the others had

to return back to their routine. She specifically

requested no one be alerted of her absence

which he professionally accommodated. But

Now it was Monday and she knew it was time

to show her face, Camille ignored all calls and

texts from those at the party, especially from

Sefa whose notifications she muted. Her

suitcases were unpacked at the hotel they’d

be staying at and the woman left out for the

space behind the scenes she was going to set

up for later that afternoon. When she arrived

she only offered smiles when people like Sami

and live said they were glad she was okay. In

reality she wasn’t, that kiss unlocked a lot

of memories and even more troubling feelings

she didn’t know she was capable of anymore. Camille took a break from setting up her studio

area deciding to go to Gorilla where the

production team was running through the show.

Sitting quietly she sipped at her matcha latte

thanking the anxiety meds she had soothing

her heart beat as the entrance music of

someone she was avoiding ran through for

practice. There he was in all his glory with his

back turned in the ring wearing a hoodie,

unaware of her presence but Camille could

only see him. “Mimi,” Trinity’s voice pulled her

attention she spotted her friend looking at her

worriedly sitting beside the woman. Camille

ducked her head not missing the man in the

ring undo his hoodie and stare at her with

an expression mixed with too many emotions

for her to decipher. “Sorry girl, I just had to

go,” Camille muttered looking up as the other

woman placed a hand on her shoulder,” you

know he wasn’t trying to hurt you,” Trinity

talked lowly locking eyes with the woman.

Shaking her own head,” I know he wouldn’t

hurt me,” “then why did you run from him?” Trinity searched her friends eyes finding the

same mix of emotions she saw in Sefa at the

party after the others caught up with him

having a mini crash out seeing the woman’s

taxi disappear down the road. Camille

swallowed harshly, her lips parted but she didn’t

have an answer, her eyes wandered finding

the intense brown eyes looking at her own. “I-

I can’t,” she uttered standing she excused

herself hurriedly walking to the backstage once

again. Sefa had spotted the woman and his

heart bumped harshly, his eyes locked on hers

and he wished he hadn’t put her through that,

but fuck why couldn’t he just be with her, he

deserved that woman. Sefa noted the two

talking as soon as Camille began to look

distressed he stopped his session and paced

behind her. He caught the woman by the arm

to which she yanked free only after noting the

offender was the man she was avoiding she

shook her head backing up. “Why did you run

from me?”, she gaped at him scoffing,” you’re

fucking with me right?!” Sefa clenched his jaw

tugging her into her studio shutting them in,”

I’m being dead ass, you kissed me back so

why the fuck did you run from me?” When

she didn’t respond he tsked,” is it Marcus, is

that lame ass little bruh back?!, is that why

you’ve been ignoring my damn calls.” Her

patience thinned she snapped,” who you

talking too Sefa, because I know damn you

haven’t lost your big headed mind to speak

at me like that.” He frustratedly pushed the door

loudly behind him ensuring they were locked in,”

why the fuck is he contacting you again?!”

Angry tears filled her eyes a trait that pissed

her off than being mad herself,”I am not seeing

nobody! who the fuck are you to be questioning

my moves, you not my damn daddy or my man.” That struck a nerve making the tall man pin her

against the table she worked at,” I said who the

fuck got you avoiding me Mimi, I’m not gonna

ask you again.” Despite how her pussy

moistened at this side of Sefa she scoffed

closing her mouth in defiance. Sefa growled

his bottom set of grills showing as he sucked

in grasping her chin forcing her attention to

him,” Camille Martin, I swear to fucking God

if you don’t answer me ima find whoever

got you acting up and kill them my damn self.” Ignoring her heart racing she rolled her eyes

speaking bluntly,”suicide isn’t very cash money.”

Sefa froze the pieces clicking in place and he

let out a small laugh in disbelief,” you’re not

fucking serious.” Camille sneered at his

mouth, she shoved past him,”whatever I

thought forget it, leave me the fuck alone

you big headed bastard.” Sefa squinted at

her running that mouth, he gripped her wrist

spinning her to him pressing her back against

the door,” you need to watch that damn mouth

of yours.” Dead panning the man in front of her

Camille sucked in her teeth,”me and my mouth

are my fucking business now are we done here

or is it about to get ugly forehead.” Sefa

scoffed,”you’re so fucking difficult why are

you always running from something good?!”

Camille shrugged him off with the slip of the

door knob she glared,” don’t follow me, matter

of fact let the stand in do your hair tonight I

don’t even want to see that stupid face!” She

hiked her purse over her shoulder and stormed

out leaving him to cuss kicking over an empty

tub. “You better pick that shit the fuck up!” She

yelled behind her shoulder exiting out the

employee parking lot ignoring the twins asking

where their brother was. “Nah fuck that,” he

stormed after the woman yanking her driver

side door open,” get out of the car Camille.” Now

feeling petty and aggravated with him she

picked at her nails boredly,” close my door so

I’m not late for my date.” Sefa froze, his face

stoned,”Get the fuck out of this damn car

Camille, I swear to God if it’s Marcus I will

put my hands on him for the first and

last time.” Satisfied with him now being

angry enough to match her pinched nerve

Camille yanked her door close and began

backing out sliding her shades on rolling up

hey tinted windows ignoring the very

obvious shouts from Sefa who had tried to

pry the door opened until she’d gotten

out of reach. If his anger was palpable it would

burn anyone who came near him, but Liv was

walking towards her own car seeing him

standing angrily she winced trying to quickly

get into her car when her wrist was caught

making her cuss but turn pasting a smile on

her face like she was in the ring,”Solo, my man

how are you?” Sefa’s eye twitched slightly,” cut

the shit Morgan, where’s Camille going

tonight?” Liv groaned promising solidarity with

her friend first she shrugged,” no clue, I gotta

go.” Sefa glared at the short woman,” I would

really hate to let that work stash of yours to

be found.” The woman cussed,” fuck you Solo,

she’s going to Cozelle’s,” she yanked her wrist

away flipping the male off speeding off. Sefa

clenched his jaw at the sound of the nice

restaurant downtown, so she really thought

that she could just kiss him back and then go

on a date,” Sefa laughed humorously clicking

his tongue to make his own way to his suite to

get ready for his date. “Well they’re both

fucking crazy,” came Jonathan’s voice to his

twin who gaped at the entire spiel they just

witnessed,” I bet she clocks him with her purse,”

came Trinity’s voice making the pair shake their

heads,” nah it’ll be either a drink tossed or a

hand,” Jey uttered as he awkwardly went into

the van transport to the hotel.

Camille was over the rush of emotions

caused by that stupid prick ass Fatu, she

had earlier in the day decided that she would

take herself out on a date. It wasn’t until after

spotting the man in the ring that she uttered

going to Cozelle’s to Liv who was nearby. The

place was a fairly nice jazz lounge with moody

lighting but had a nice vibe to it. Not to even

mention they had bomb ass original cocktails

she had her mind on. Camille put on a showy

dress adding some cute strap heels she made

her way out having ubered to the destination

planning on getting trashed at a nice ass

establishment. When she arrived her legs

carried her to the bar where she ordered two

of the days specials on cocktails, the bartender

chuckled as she quickly nursed one glass like

a shot,”long day?” Camille snorted swallowing

the remainder of the second drink, she carried

herself to the balcony looking down at where

the live jazz played. Her racing thoughts

simmered to a stop with the aide of the

alcohol in her system, in all honesty her brain

was not even processing the music zoned out

from the sudden stoppage of her mind rushing.

Sefa dressed up for the restaurant having

looked into it, so some asshole wanted to

be cute and take his girl out on some swanky

lame ass date? He tsked bitterly, that mother

fucker would be on his last damn date was the

thought coursing his veins as he headed directly

to the venue. He wandered in surveying the

space his eyes peering out for that smart

ass mouth that would be answering for this

bullshit. When he noted that most of the

guests were older adults he gaped, so she

not only wanted to piss him off she didn’t

think he could take care of her so she was

gonna meet up with some elderly fuck. Sefa caught the brief flash of familiar tattoos

his feet marching ahead when he caught

the heavy whiff of alcohol he growled, she

was a light weight, “who the fuck got you

drinking like this,” he growled tugging her

protectively against him looking around

for the perpetrator. Camille squinted her

eyes, when she made out familiar features

she shoved him off,” get away from me,

I can’t even take myself out on a damn

date without you suffocating me.” Sefa

prodded his inside cheek with his tongue,” Ima

act like you didn’t just say that, get your stuff

we are going.” Camille gritted her teeth,” I’m not

going anywhere, not with you.” Sefa shook his

head she was damn lucky he had a public image

to maintain, “yeah we’re done here, say good

night Camille.” The woman didn’t get a chance

to throw a slurred cuss out at him being lifted

like a bag of apples over his shoulder to his car

where she was strapped harshly into the

passenger seat, the muscular male just as

quickly pulled off being deadly silent. “Take

me home, right now,” she yelled out. Sefa

ignored her tantrum instead picking up speed to

the hotel, it was with only a little attention from

staff when he punched in his code and was in

his own suite with her thrown on his bed.

Camille cussed at him feeling dizzy, he yanked

her heels off and tossed them,” you’re a fucking

lightweight, if I hadn’t shown up who would

have protected you from creeps huh?!

Camille snapped,” the only creep is you,

why are you always fucking following me?!”,

she kicked at his arms when he was trying to

take her shoes off. Sefa took a deep breath,

pinching the bridge of his nose,” you’re so

fucking impossible Camille, as if you didn’t

know.” The woman gaped at him standing up

she shook her head,” what the fuck are you

talking about Sefa?!” He glared,” you can

drop the act Camille we both know what

this is.” She smacked his chest,” you are

getting on my last damn nerves, why did

you have to change?!” His eyes widened a

small flash of hurt hit his features though it

went to a new anger,” I was sick and fucking

tired of you making the same fucking mistakes.”

Camille froze at his outburst,” now wait a damn

minute, what fucking mistakes Sefa Fatu?! right now the only mistake I’m realizing is not

knocking them teeth out your damn mouth.”

Sefa began pacing trying to calm himself down

but an intoxicated Camille was her most blunt

form. “I’m talking to you Fatu why the fuck are

you talking to me any type of way?!” Sefa

found his repetition of counting up and down

no longer soothing the way his nerves were

singed by the frustration he’d been carrying for

years. “You’ve been constantly making the

wrong choices when it came to men, from the

time we met to now you’re so damn clueless,”

he threw the words at her. Camille froze,” If

you’ve had enough insulting me, I think I’m

going to leave before you make me say

something I’ll regret.” Sefa laughed out,” that’s

fucking rich, go do what you’re a champ at and

run away,” he clapped sarcastically pissing her

off, Camille went to slap him but his reflexes

snatched her wrist mid air,” you’re the most

aggravating damn woman I’ve ever met, I don’t

know why I follow you around, I’ve spent years

trying to be seen by you and you never spare a

glance, like I’m damn invisible, like I’m not the

best option.” Camille shook her head,” yeah

you clearly are fucking insane, I’m out,” she

found some strength wrenching her hand free. Her mind seemed to catch up a bit, her anger

sobering her up,” wait a fucking minute,you’ve

been dick riding me and pissing me off any

chance you get over that kiss?!” Sefa

frustratingly sighed,” just leave Camille, I don’t

know why I ever fell for your stupid ass.” Camille

steadied herself,” you’re insane, what are you

damn talking about?!” He cussed out knocking

something over, causing the woman to jump

sitting down on the edge of the bed out of

surprise. “I’ve been in love with your clueless

ass since we first met at that party my brother

had with Trinity.” He didn’t wait feeling the

words rush out like angry waves of water,” if you

weren’t so fucking blind you wouldn’t have been

through all those lame ass ex’s, especially

Marcus.” The information dump made her

head spin, shaking her head in a daze the

woman gripped the blankets by her fingers

trying to steady some sense of reality,” you

don’t mean that shit.” Sefa dropped to the

ground in front of her,” is this what your cruel

ass wants huh?!, me to be on my knees and

beg for you to see me as a man and not

some fucking kid.” He wiped at his face

bitter with agitation,” I am the perfect man

for you, I have been here in the shadows, I

know everything about you, I know all of

your likes and dislikes, I have seen you

in all aspects, and I am in love with you, fuck

Camille I love you, so damn much, and I know

you feel it too , that kiss showed me.” Camille

felt overwhelmed by the situation she found

herself as the admittance from the man

mixed with the way her head violently

thrummed. Her head hit the ground quicker

than she fell unconscious, Sefa yelled out

catching her head in his arms,”Camille what the

fuck?!,” he pulled out his phone dialing Trinity

and Jonathan who were there quickly helping

him with her on the hotel bed with their own

company medics coming in and setting her up. “What happened?,” Trinity spoke urgently to

him seeing some things tossed about and

the younger Fatu looking overwhelmed. “I told

her I had feelings for her.” Jonathan gaped,”

so she knows you like her,” Sefa shook his head

frustrated tears fell down his cheek,” I told her I

was in love with her, I told her I loved her.”

“Fuck,” the married couple coughed out in

realization of the importance of the moment.

[late-to-the-party-81]

Needy

Request: Or, or! Lately, I have been plagued by the thought of a pouty, needy Thor 🥺❤️

He just wants to stay in with his girl, but she’s got errands to run and places to be, so Thor just sits around pouting, and waiting for her 😔

He goes from straight up begging her to stay, possibly in his knees, to sending her some ~spicy~ videos and pics while she’s gone, trying to lure her home again 😈

When she finally gets home, the big, soft bear that he is, he just envelops her, grabs her and holds her 🥺 Maybe he sits her on his cock, rubbing against her like a cat and purring, and refusing to let go until he falls asleep ❤️

AN: Thank you @lauratang - I’ve tackled your second suggestion first. I hope you enjoy the neediness… I’ve decided this is the same pairing as in my Kinktober 22 fic, Food for thought

Beta’d by @flordeamatista

Dividers by @firefly-graphics and mood board by me.

Masterlist

Summary: Thor is a needy menace.

Relationship: Thor x Agent!Reader

Word Count: 1.7k

CW: Needy Thor, suggestive language, sexting, masturbation, dirty talk, cock-warming, fluff

“But I want you to stay…”

Oh god, the pathetic way those words came out of his mouth. It was both amusing and endearing at the same time. Unfortunately you didn’t have the time to indulge him, no matter how much you might want to.

“Thor. Stop it, you big baby. I told you. I have a shift to do and, because you keep eating me out of house and home, I need to stop at the compound store on the way in because there is nothing for me to take for lunch.”

He at least had the good grace to look chagrined at your retort, but it didn’t lessen his pout any.

“I will go to the store for you, Skatt. Just stay here with me and I will buy you all the jaffa cookies…”

“Cakes…”

“...Jaffa cakes you like. I will peel them and feed them to you.” He stalked closer to you, blue eyes narrowed, and you giggled as you stepped back, trapped against the hall wall. He lent forward, arms braced either side of your head, his hair swinging in both your faces. “I’ll even do that thing you like…”

With a giggle you ducked under his arm, and gave a slap to his ass.

“Cool it, hot stuff. There’ll be time for that later. I have to go.”

Your giggle turned into a full on laugh when he grabbed your hand and dropped to his knees in front of you. He pushed up your top and pressed his face to your stomach, littering it with kisses.

“But I might be dead later. How do I go on living without you here? I need you, little one. There is no air without you.”

“Okay, cool it, Shakespeare.” Leaning over you pressed a kiss to his mouth and the another to his forehead, somehow extricating your hand from his in the process. “I’ll be back before you know it. Now, sit. Stay.”

You slipped out of the door, shaking your head with a smile on your face. 

Your God of a boyfriend was so sappy sometimes.

You were in the middle of a meeting, your team leader droning on about mandatory refresher training, reading aloud from their sloppy powerpoint presentation, when you felt the buzz of your phone in your pocket.

Surreptitiously you pulled it out and glanced down

Thor: I miss you, kjære. What are you doing?

You weren’t really in a position to answer him, so you turned your phone over and rested it in your lap under the table.

Buzz

Stifling a sigh you flipped it over again.

Thor: I’m so lonely without you 🥺🥺😭❤️

Buzz

Thor: When do you get home?

You decided to risk it, and started tapping away, glancing back up every few characters.

You: in a meeting. Home at 4. Read a book/have a nap. Speak later. xoxo

You turned the vibrate alert off and slipped your phone back in your pocket, turning your attention back to the meeting. Supporting the Avengers in keeping the earth safe definitely wasn’t all glamour and parades. Sometimes it was lame Powerpoint presentations…

When your meeting finally finished you were glad that it was lunch time. You’d managed to pick up an overpriced packaged salad at the store on your way in and were looking forward to tucking in, but first you needed to go to the washroom.

After you dried your hands, you remembered your phone so as you exited the washroom, hand on the door, you pulled it from your pocket. The screen lit up as you touched it, showing a litany of messages. You rolled your eyes and stopped in the hallway outside the washroom, leaning on the wall as you opened your texts… and then immediately pressed the screen to your chest, looking around furtively to make sure that no-one had caught a glimpse of your screen. Luckily the corridor was empty.

With more aplomb than you ever thought you’d had, you made your way down the hall to the closest empty conference room. You bolted inside, turned the lock and pulled the window shades so you couldn’t be observed. Your body sank into one of the conference chairs, and with trembling hands pulled your phone away from your shirt.

First was another text.

Thor: I tried to sleep, min skatt, but being on the bed made me think of you.

Then, under that was a picture. It was of Thor’s torso, from the waist down, naked apart from a tight pair of boxer briefs that did nothing to hide the bulge within them.

Thor: I need you to come help me. I ache for you.

The last message was followed by a video thumbnail. Underneath the white play symbol in the middle of the image was Thor’s torso once again. You could feel your heart racing, and your mouth was dry as your thumb inched towards your screen and tapped it.

“I need you, little one.” Thor’s deep voice sounded over your phone speaker, laden with desire and you squeezed your thighs together at the sound of it. He had the camera pointed at his tented briefs, and then his other hand came in shot, stroking and groping over the soft cotton, a light tease. “How could you leave me alone so cruelly, when you know I ache for you every minute of every day? How am I supposed to survive this torture?”

His hand slipped under the waistband of his shorts to take hold of himself, and you watched, transfixed as he started to jerk himself, the tip of his cock poking out of the top of the fabric. Fuck! You could even see a pearl of precum forming in his slit. 

With each stroke he exposed more and more of himself to the camera, moaning wantonly and talking dirty to you from behind it.

“Norns, if you were here, kjære, I’d worship you so. I would feast on you, over and over, just to hear you calling my name  so loud that all of Midgard and Vahalla would know who was pleasuring you. I need to feel you around my cock. I need your warmth. Your wetness. Hurry home, love.”

The video came to an end and you just sat there, engulfed in a state of confused arousal. 

When had Thor learnt how to sext? And how on earth were you supposed to continue with your day knowing that he was waiting at home for you like that? How were you supposed to just sit in the canteen to have your lunch with your pussy pulsing in your now sodden underwear? 

Curse Thor! 

Curse the handsome bastard to Jotunheim and back.

Somehow you made it through to the end of your shift, although you were obviously distracted, and twice you snuck off to the bathroom, now with your earbuds, to watch the video again. You also managed not to message Thor back, not wanting to give him any reaction that might make matters better worse. 

You practically jogged through the main doors and reception of the accommodation part of the compound, swiping your card to access the private elevator and sending it straight to the floor where you stayed with your Asgardian boyfriend. When it stopped, you stepped out, ready to give him a piece of your mind for teasing you all day, but immediately found yourself caught up in a pair of burly arms.

“You’re home! At last!” He pressed kisses all over your face, before capturing your lips. 

You squeaked as he hefted you in his arms, his kisses overwhelming your senses. 

Before you knew it he was pressing you down onto the bed, his hands shedding you of your clothes. It was when his flesh came into contact with yours that you realised he was already naked. His cock nudged your thigh as one of his hands spread your legs apart, cupping your pussy and teasing your entrance.

“So my little message to you did have an effect.” 

You snorted. “Of course it did, you bastard. I was working, not dead… oh fuck!” Your sarcastic retort was cut off as he pressed two fingers into you, stretching you out. As he did so, he continued to kiss up and down your neck, nuzzling into you. You moaned, your lust and arousal overriding your need to chew him out for his antics. Your back arched as you sucked air into your lungs, your body so tantalisingly close to the edge.

Then he pulled his fingers away and you whined.

“Thor!”

“I know, skatt. I know. It’s how I’ve felt all day. But I’ll make it better, really soon.”

He rolled the pair of you onto your sides and hooked your upper leg over his hip, opening you to him, and your eyes rolled into the back of your head as he pressed his thick cock inside you. His arms wrapped around your body, ensuring there wasn’t even the slightest gap between you. His lips brushed your hair, your temples, your eyelids, and then he kissed your mouth again. You opened to him like a flower in bloom, eager for his impassioned love-making, but when you tried to roll your hips he held them still. 

“Relax, little one. You’ve been at work all day. You must be tired. Have a nap, my love.”

Your jaw dropped. “But… but… you… all day… I thought…” A roughened finger covered your lips, silencing you.

“I’m right where I want to be. Where I need to be. And I’ll still be here when you wake up. Then, kjære, I will worship you as I promised. But just give me this, let me enjoy you. Besides, you’ll need your energy for later.”

He continued with his soft kisses and caresses, his cock buried deep within you, and despite your scepticism about your ability to go to sleep with him like that, you soon felt your eyes closing again, your body going lax as slumber started to encase you. 

The last thing you heard before sinking into the soft depths was Thor’s voice, gently rumbling in your ear. “I love you, min skatt. You are the most precious treasure in the nine realms.”

Tag list: @jobean12-blog @tuiccim @sidepartskinnyjeans @krissy25 @bodeckersdiamonddoll @goldylions @luxeavenger @wheezy-stucky @doasyoudesireandlive @chemtrails-club @peaches1958 @pono-pura-vida @writing-for-marvel

[chunkymamatam]

oh dear first of all i am sorry for your loss and i hope you feel better.

secondly i want to thank you for sharing your experiences with ace and deuce.

ace pulling that "we sharing a bed?" line made me cringe badly...what in the-

deuces line "you mean im about to be suspended because you couldnt leave her alone?" made me giggle

i would certainly love to hear more. nothing specific, just whatever you feel like sharing.

thank you for taking the time to read and respond to my messages, have a nice one :)

Thank you for your condolences. I'm feeling better since then. Last night sucked though because I had to go through my aunt's (Thats who died) clothes and picked out a few things. They still smell like her and me and my cousin had a good cry about it. Love that little girl so much.

Anyway! You're so welcome. I love talking about those two. They're ridiculous lmfao. Because why tf did I have to sit there and explain the birds and the bees for chickens to Deuce's grown ass. I love him but he's a little dumb sometimes (/pf /aff)

Ace will run to me every time he's in trouble with Riddle lmfao I don't protect him half the time so idk why. Wouldn't be surprised if its just a lame excuse to touch me ngl cuz every time he does he ducks behind me and touches my side. He should be careful I'm very ticklish and will start swinging if it surprises me enough lmfao

Those two are always trying to plot against my wallet tho. Cuz why are you always trying to manipulate me into buying your lunches??? Get a job hoes

I can't wait for them to figure out that I'm hanging out with Malleus and he's one of my best friends. Its gonna be hilarious to witness in person haha!

[thewritingofspencerrose]

M.Hughes Masterlist

First Day on the Job

It's chilly in the arena when we enter, hand in hand, for my first day.

Only a week into living here and I still don't fully think this has all set in.

I may be working on a medical team, but I'm going to be the first stop of all injured players as soon as they're off the ice.

It's all on me.

"Hey, what's going on in there?" A physical knocking on my forehead brings me from my thoughts, Trevor's smile being the first thing in front of me, mocking and coy.

Part of me wants to just smile and say I dazed off, but this is Trev, he's my partner in

"What if someone bleeds out? Or worse, what if everyone hates me?"

"What's the worst scenario?" Jamie questions from our side, not even attempting to save his laugh, Trevor pulling me closer to his body. "Everyone hating you?"

"You do realize everyone loves you right?" They're tag-teaming my nerves right now, and honestly I'm not even sure that'll be enough.

No exam prepared me for the nauseous anxiety that starting a lead job would bring.

"They don't know me!" It's a lame argument, but valid all the same as I pause just outside the locker room door. I know I'm allowed in. It's where I've been instructed to meet Coach Cronin and introduce myself to the boys.

"We have all heard literally everything about you, I'm pretty sure I could tell you things about yourself that you don't even know, Mags," his words are meant to be assuring, but assuring isn't loading properly right now.

"Then what if I don't live up to their idea of me?"

Even if I hadn't already been on the edge of a breakdown, the look on Trevor's face as he takes my shoulders, his shoulders slumped and eyes downcast.

"The boys already love you because I love you, and that's never going to change. So we're going to march your cute little ass into this lockerroom and wow everyone with all that Latin-anatomy-nonsense that we studied the last four years, got it?"

Sorry Dad, you better be saving for a wedding.

I just smile though, small and wide while he returns my look. But Jamie's groaning, moaning on about something involving us getting a room, and I can hear the sound of staff coming down the hall.

"Okay, let's get this over with so I can go home and rant about it with Q."

The boys both laugh, but Jamie is the one to open the door, Trev taking ahold of my hand with one of his, his other covering my eyes as he leads me into the loud atmosphere.

"Okay boys! Put 'em away! My girls here and unless you break 'em I want them nowhere near her eyeline!" Nevermind on the wedding, I may just kill him here and now.

"Trevor Zegras!" The team laughs loudly, oohing and ahhing while I pry Trev's hand off, and I can't help but laugh as I look out around me.

These boys are going to make me cry. Correction, I am crying.

"You guys-"

Trevor's hands wrap around my waist, chin resting on my shoulder and I can feel his smile. "Welcome to the team, Baby."

"And welcome to the team from the rest of us," the one I know to be Mason greets, everyone around clapping. "I'm not going to call you baby, because I value my life, but we're all really glad you're here, Margaret."

"Maggie," I correct softly, Mason's smile growing as Leo jumps up like a happy puppy.

"We get nickname privileges?"

There's a joy throughout the room as I take in his smile, the banner saying CONGRATULATIONS in Ducks colors, balloons and all sprawled about.

How could I not give these boys nickname privileges when they seem just as excited to see me as they would an old friend. It's like they're seeing Trev or Jamie after a long break.

"Of course you do, as long as y'all keep from getting too beat up," I offer, sticking out a hand. "Deal?"

"Deal to do our best," Leo accepts, shaking my hand as some of the veterans laugh.

Gudas just chuckling and shaking his head as he watches us both. "She's going to run this whole show."

[tonberry-yoda]

Pineapple Flip Flops - A One Piece Modern AU - Chapter 2

notes - Here's chapter 2!!! I had a lot of fun writing this one because Ace is my canon boyfriend and I get to brag about him through my writing tee hee. Also, Luffy is 19 in this AU :) word count - 818 summary - Luffy wakes up to his brother Ace and they make food together while considering college.

“Hey, doof-ass, wake up.” Ace smacked Luffy’s forehead with a rolled up magazine and Luffy woke right up, sucking in a line of drool.

“Huh?” Luffy looked around the apartment in confusion, but his face lit up when he saw his brother in front of him. “Yo! Ace, Ace, look!” He shoved his foot in Ace’s face and Ace just laughed, pushing his foot away.

“Nice foot, Luffy.” Ace rolled his eyes with a laugh and walked to the kitchen.

“No, no, look!” Luffy ran after him and slipped off his flip flops, which made him trip over his own feet and fall onto the floor. That didn't stop him though and he was able to show Ace the design on his new shoes.

Ace squinted and then laughed out loud. “Are those new?”

“Uh-huh! I lost my pineapple ones today.”

“Damn, bud, that sucks. Those were my favorite ones.”

“Me too.” Luffy pouted and sat at the dining room table, splaying his arms in front of him.

“Well, I dig the rubber ducks.” Ace stared in the freezer. “Want pizza?”

“PIZZA!” Luffy threw his arms in the air.

“Pizza it is.” He pulled out two frozen pizzas and laid them on the counter, preheating the oven. “Really sucks that Sabo isn't here. Neither of us can cook actual food.”

“Yeah,” Luffy chuckled. “You always almost burn the house down.”

“Shut up.” Ace laughed and sat across from Luffy.

The two sat in short silence for a little while just randomly scrolling on their phones. But Luffy got bored pretty quickly and started drumming on the table. He just wanted the pizza right then and there and was hoping to kill at least a little bit of time.

Ace looked up from his phone and smiled. “What did you do today, Luff?” he asked. “Other than lose your shoes.”

“Just rode my bike all day.” He laid his head down on the table and turned it over, making his cheek squish and voice muffle. “You?”

“Just work. I helped with some field trip for another school and then started doing after school activities again.”

“Where was the field trip?” Luffy asked hopefully.

“Just some little pool. It was crowded as hell.”

“Lame.”

“It was fun though. And no one drowned,” Ace chuckled. “So that was good.”

The oven was done preheating, so Ace got up and put the pizzas in there. He then leaned against the counter and stretched, doing some overdramatic yawn. “When are you planning on going to college, Luffy?” he asked mid-yawn.

Luffy looked at Ace in the kitchen with disgust. “Never.”

“You can't mow lawns forever.” Ace scoffed.

“I know. But I am not going to college. Shanks didn't, and he’s doing really good.”

“I know, buddy.” Ace sighed and walked back to the dining room. “But you’re Luffy, not Shanks.” He poked Luffy’s chest. “There’s still time to apply if you wanna. Plus, I think you’d like my major.”

“But I don't wanna have to take a math class!” Luffy groaned.

Ace laughed. “Neither do I.”

Ace majored in outdoor activities where he got the opportunity to learn a lot and travel a lot. The things he got to do were always fun: rock climbing, hiking, nutrition, etc. But – as said earlier – there were its boring parts, like having to take math in order to graduate, but that's what Sabo was for whenever he was around.

Ace had only been in college for a year, but he would always come home with a smile and a story. Luffy loved these stories – even getting jealous some of the time – so Ace figured that Luffy would love college. But he insisted he would rather explore the world on his own and figure the rest out himself.

Ace understood Luffy, but as his older brother, he couldn't help but worry a little also. The world wasn't built for people like them and that sucked big time. It was surprising they even made it out of high school.

The timer on Ace’s phone went off, signaling that the pizzas were ready, and Luffy jumped up with a smile.

The two brothers ran to the kitchen and collected their pizzas, sighing knowing that they had to wait for them to cool.

“Speaking of college,” Ace said, trying to cool down his pizza by fanning it with his hand. “I have to go get some financial aid stuff figured out tomorrow before classes start in the next couple weeks. Wanna come with?”

“Only if I get food.” Luffy said with a mouthful of pizza already.

“Yeah, we’ll go get some lunch.”

“Then sure, I'm not doin’ anything better.”

Ace smiled and ate his own pizza, just barely burning his tongue in the process.

It was getting lonely without Sabo, but it was nice to know that Ace was going to have a day out with his favorite little brother.

~~~~~

one piece masterlist | one piece modern AU masterlist | pinned post | ko-fi

2023 @tonberry-yoda– do not repost or claim ANY of my work as your own! likes, reblogs, and comments are not only welcome, but appreciated

~~~~~

[stayarmytinyzenmoa-l]

NCT Spooky Season [Day 7]

Mischief Managed

TW: Language, Ghosts, dead bodies, gun use, break-in-and-enter Genre: Comedy Pairing: Liu Yangyang x Reader YN Pronouns: Not specified Word Count: 1.0K Prompt: “Who says I can’t be a sexy ghost?”

[NCT Masterlist] | [NCT Spooky Season Masterlist] | [Yesterday] | [Tomorrow] | [Part 2] [Ao3 Link] | [Wattpad Link]

Notes: I can't ever write Yangyang as not your Bestie okay Prominence ruined me Disclaimer: Please remember that this is an AU and a work of fiction, obviously the idols mentioned/written about in this story would never partake in these actions. The idols mentioned in this work are meant to be seen more as face claims rather than the actual idols themselves.

Feedback is greatly appreciated!! Thank you for reading!

"I still can't believe that of all the people I'd be spending a whole eternity with... it's with you," you watched Yangyang phase through walls repeatedly, changing his expression each time he came back and even once changing his whole outfit.

"Wasn't this the plan anyway?" He asks after finally settling down.

"I mean... I guess, yeah," you shrugged, looking down at your non-living body. "Still, though, I can't believe I died with you."

"And in such a lame way too," Yangyang tries to kick his own non-living body, but his foot just phases through just like with the wall. "Do we even know that guy?" He points at the burglar rummaging through your drawers. You shrugged.

"First of all, why the hell would I know him? Second of all, fuck you," you looked at him, "in comes a burglar with a gun, what do I expect? Best friend to pull me out of the way but no, he ducks behind me and I get shot first, then before he could move he got shot too so what's the point?!" You groaned.

"Yeah, fair, sorry I used you as a living shield," Yangyang floats over to the window but, when he tries to exit, he is thrown back into the flat.

"And we can never leave?! What kind of bullshit-"

"Hey! Okay, hold on, it can't all be bad," Yangyang floats over to you and wraps an arm around your shoulder, "how about we do some silly ghost stuff?" His eyebrows wiggle and you roll your eyes.

"Deal."

~

"The fuck?" The burglar pulls your desk apart. "These bitches don't have anything! Fuck, they really lived like this," he pulls your textbook out and rifles through the pages, he looks back at your motionless body. "You should thank me for putting you both out of your misery," he snickers. Then he hears something fall behind him and, when he turns back around to the desk, he noticed that he cup holding your pens and pencils had toppled over. "Huh..." he puts it back up and, once he does, he hears something else fall behind him and his head whips back, finding a sheet now thrown over the bodies as well as the lampshade toppled over. The burglar pauses and stares at the sheet before looking at the lampshade, which was still rocking back and forth from the impact of falling.

"Wack," the burglar shudders and goes back to ransacking your apartment, until he hears the dresser drawers fly open behind him and he walks backward until he hits the desk, grabbing onto it's edge for support, while clothes were thrown out of the dresser and into random parts of the room, and as soon as the nightstand fell over the burglar screamed and ran out of the apartment.

Meanwhile, you and Yangyang were losing your shit. Both of you were laughing your asses off like it was the funniest thing you'd ever seen, and to be honest it kind of was.

"Yo, Yang, quit rummaging through my clothes.

"I've been looking for this shirt," he pulls it out and, for a brief moment, it stays in his hold before it fell to the ground.

"Well, you found it, too bad you can't wear it anymore, dude," you shrugged and Yangyang groans.

"Oo... what's this?" He digs a little deeper and you walk toward him to see what he found and, in seconds, he pulls out the lingerie set and, if it could, you were sure your face would've heated up. "All for me?"

"Hell no," you groaned and, once you tugged it out of his grasp, you heard the sound of a thread snapping and the lingerie set fell to the floor. But, strangely enough, you were still holding the set, only this time a more ghostly version of it.

"How'd you do that?!" Yangyang tries to find his favorite sweaters now.

"It ripped and now I'm holding it? You held the set to your chest and looked in the mirror. "Ooh, Yang, maybe I can be a sexy ghost?"

"Found it!" He pulls a shirt out and hands it to you. Once you grabbed it, he took his side and yanked on it, causing the shirt to rip down the middle and allowing Yangyang to pull up a "dead" version of it. “Look at us! Let’s scare the shit out of whoever moves in next.”

“Oh, shit, here comes DJ,” you watched Xiaojun walk in and near scream his head off.

“Fuck, I forgot I invited him over,” Yangyang sighs. “Sorry, Dejun,” he folds his hands and you sat next to the spot Dejun fell over at.

“That idiot…” Dejun was in disbelief.

“I know,” you make a sorry attempt at consoling him.

“He was only supposed to kill Yangyang.”

“What?” Your hand lifts.

“What?!” Yangyang’s shout was louder.

General Tag List: @stopeatread @bat-shark-repellant @raeincitizen @umbralhelwolf @yangsrose @kazooms @sadcoffeecritic 

NCT Tag List: @cherrylovr @minjiville 

If you want to be added to either tag list or removed just send me a reply to this post, and ask, or a DM and I’ll add you as soon as possible!

[beyourownanchor6]

thanks for the tags beloveds @disasterbuckdiaz @wikiangela @honestlydarkprincess @spotsandsocks @wildlife4life @giddyupbuck @hippolotamus 🩵

—look at me, posting on a friday 😃 so i may or may not have started a new wip last night, so here have some of it. not sure how i feel about it yet, so tell me if it sucks firjenssk

Dragging his shoes across the floor, Buck walked back out onto the field, scrolling through his phone, looking for some music to help drown out the doubt. He squinted up at the sun as he passed the bleachers, Buck reaching up and taking his hat off. Running his fingers through his sweaty curls, Buck replaced the cap onto his head, but this time backwards.

“Hell of a run you had.”

Buck squinted against the sun once more as he searched for the voice, his eyes landing on a brown eyed beauty. He couldn’t be sure the boy was talking to him, Buck standing there a little in shock for a moment. The boy arched a brow at him, Buck quickly clearing his throat and adjusting his stance.

“Uh thanks.”

Buck had no idea how to respond, the boy in front of him too stunning for words. The guy wasn’t wearing anything spectacular, just a warn pair of shoes and jeans, topped with a raglan shirt; it was something Buck wore all the time, and yet, this guy looked—well he looked incredible. Way out of Buck’s league if he were being honest.

“You gotta good stance. Nice hit too.”

Buck shrugged. “I didn’t even make a homerun man.”

The boy studied him for a moment, looking Buck over with a tilt of his head.

“Coulda fooled me. From where I was sitting, I saw those long ass legs of yours hit every base.”

Buck felt himself flush. He quickly ducked his head down and brought a hand up to the back of his neck where he rubbed there nervously. When he managed to face the other boy again, he was still stood there, looking down from the bleachers right at Buck.

“You uh, you were watching me?”

The guy smiled down to him then with a shrug of his shoulders.

“Well, I was watching the whole team, but I tend to focus on the best players.”

Buck cleared his throat again, more nervously that time. Was this guy flirting with him or was Buck completely losing his mind?

“You um, you come to many games?”

It was lame, but all Buck could come up with. He was used to doing the flirting, not the other way around.

The boy chuckled, a deep warming sound, Buck instantly wanting to hear it again.

“This was my first one. I’m new here, just started this week.”

Oh. Well, that made sense. What didn’t make sense was how the hell Buck had missed this guy for a whole ass week.

tagging: @loserdiaz @redlightsandicedtea @onward--upward @monsterrae1 @buddierights @eddiebabygirldiaz @barbiediaz @cowboydiazes @wh0re-behavi0r @spaceprincessem @transbuck @thewolvesof1998

[amateur-selfshipper]

Tumblr if my S/Is were Canon

💙 dewey-devito Follow

“We need messier ships-” You guys can’t even handle Playmates

( 113 notes )

🦈 shook-shark Follow

What if I wrote an essay about Ice Duck Cometh’s Ozlem parallels? Haha jk- unless?

🦈 shook-shark

Update: I am now 704 words in 😳

#this is getting out of hand fam

( 35 notes )

🌅 cathedaisy Follow

“If I had a lame ass boyfriend I would hype him up so much I would make him wait outside so I could go in first and be like, ‘Get ready here comes the most specialest boy ever if you don’t cheer and clap for him I’ll fucking blow this whole building up.” - Catherine, talking about Rocky

#Incorrect Lackadaisy Quotes #Catherock #Catherine Korzhenko #Rocky Rickaby #source: Twitter

( 72 notes )

🧼 kermit-spring Follow

I’m on my knees Juanda L’Orange is some of the best tomboy rep we ever got and no one even REMEMBERS HER 😭

#Juanda you will always be famous #Baby Butch Icon #Juanda L’Orange #MDTAS

( 5 notes )

💜 ex0t1c-butt3rs Follow

So was anybody going to tell me that FNAF was the franchise to give us Ukrainian American representation, or was I just supposed to find out from the game trailer?

💜 ex0tic-butt3rs

Me recognizing the Sirko and the Wolf allusion while western FNAF fans are oblivious:

#They don’t even KNOW #Steel Wool you have saved our lives we are eternally grateful #Sirko Daley #FNAF

( 15 notes )

🦉 drugdealingowl Follow

THEY FUCKED IN THE DARK RIDE???

#OH MY GOOOOOOD #Freaky Playmates COMFIRMED #I can’t believe we got a Garfield Dark Ride reference oh my god #Holy Shit #Playmates #The Amazing Digital Circus Spoilers #Wendy #Jax #The Amazing Digital Circus

( 27 notes )

🌌 starl1tsky Follow

Honestly I can’t even blame Jinx for catching feels for Vox like if I watched a savvy business man go completely soft and adoring for sharks I’d be in love too

#Jinx/Vox #Jox #Vinx #Vonx #? #Seriously what is their ship name???

( 50 notes )

🥭 fruicy-juit Follow

Obsessed with Jolt. He’s like if a sitcom character had an existential crisis. He got sent to Hell for ThoughtCrime. If someone is bothering his friend his immediate response is offering to kill them. He’s 23. He’s an electrician. He has such a low sense of self worth that he suggested blowing his brains out like an old Looney Tunes to make people laugh. He should be in the club. He’s banned from the club for biting people. He is five foot three. He somehow befriended the cannibal who straight up doesn’t even like other men. He killed Exorcists with an electrified crowbar.

🥭 fruicy-juit

#And he’s dating a porn star 3 feet taller than him

And he’s dating a porn star three feet taller than him!!!

( 33 notes )