#it is 3 am and i gotta sleep but . my heart was fucking pounding dude

[mars-ipan]

damn... charlie's a good ass actor

[taestefully-in-luv]

Always You | JJK (Drabble#7)

Summary: You come back from Japan.

Pairing: Always You!Jungkook x female reader

Genre:, fluff!!

Word count: 3.8k

Warnings: mentions of sex

Notes: Here is technically the first drabble I wrote but I am only now just posting hehe. it's just a lil something something. This isn’t the end of drabbles don’t worry! Remember requests for drabble ideas are open! Lets chat:)

Taglist: @seagulljk @fancycollectormoon @justinetingball

© taestefully-in-luv

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I can’t believe it’s been a year since she left and you still get this nervous every time you see her.” Jimin playfully jabs Jungkook.

“Like, didn’t you just see her two months ago?”

Jungkook stands here, in the middle of the airport, holding a rose. He breathes in and out, his unsteady breaths making Jimin giggle.

“Two months is a long time ago dude.” Jungkook pouts, he brings the rose to his nose and takes a sniff, hoping the aroma will calm him.

“And she’s here for good now…and you know why I am so fucking nervous dude.” Jungkook keeps staring ahead, watching as crowds of people walk through the busy airport. His heart is slightly pounding as he watches in anticipation…you should be walking through at any moment.

“I know, I know.” Jimin smiles, “She’s going to love it.”

The last few months you were home before you left for Japan, you and Jungkook decided to get a place together. The few months you got to live together were pure bliss. Jungkook and you lived happily and comfortably together again, except this time sharing a room. You two did everything together, letting the newness of the relationship swallow you down in the most wonderful way. Cooking together, sleeping together, sometimes even bathing together. BFF bubble baths? Yeah, that. But naked. Just everything.

Jungkook had visited you in japan 3 or 4 times. But in a whole year only seeing you 3 or 4 times felt like nothing. He found himself feeling lonely quite often in your empty apartment but having the guys around really helped. Jungkook is beyond excited and also nervous to see you. He always feels this way, the distance that Japan put between the both of you really took a toll on him but he always stayed strong.

“I think I see her!” Jimin’s giddy voice makes it to Jungkook’s ears, “Let’s go!” Jimin grabs on to Jungkook’s arm and starts dragging him towards the crowd of people.

“Okay, okay.” Jungkook picks up his pace, his eyes scanning for you but he doesn’t see you. Why doesn’t he see you?

“Right there, right there!” Jimin begins pointing in some general direction. And then he sees you. He sees your bright green cardigan first and then he sees your smile next. Jungkook starts jogging towards you as his smile grows so fucking wide on his face, his teeth proudly displayed.

“y/n!” he calls out, now running towards you.

You see Jungkook making his way towards you, this boy is not slowing down. You start to laugh as you start walking faster and faster towards him too.

“Jungkook!” you yell at, not caring how loud you’re being. You are seeing your boyfriend for the first time in a couple months and you are so fucking excited. Especially because there is no more goodbyes after this.

Jungkook finally reaches you and scoops you up in his strong arms, he holds on to you so fucking tightly that you struggle to breathe. You’re laughing so loudly and hugging him back. He spins you around in a couple circles, his excitement is clear to any bystanders. Jimin finally catches up to you both and you catch his eye. You smile excitedly towards him and he slumps his shoulders in pout.

“I wanna hug her too Kook.” Jimin playfully frowns.

Jungkook keeps squeezing you, his head in the crook of your neck as he inhales you. He mumbles something into your hair and neither you nor Jimin understand what he said.

“My turn, my turn.” Jimin continues to whine. You can’t help but continue to giggle when Jungkook lifts his head from you and spins you around until he’s facing Jimin.

“No. All mine.” He says matter of fact and you hit his back.

“You have to share me, baby.”

“I most certainly do not.” Jungkook says in a stern voice and you start chuckling.

“Okay, okay. You can put me down now.”

Jungkook sets you down gently but he doesn’t loosen his grip around you. He continues to hold you, his eyes finally meeting yours. You look up at him and he feels himself transforming into a god damn puddle.

“Why do you look so beautiful, hm?” Jungkook leans in closer to you, “Why does my girl look so fucking beautiful?”

“Jungkook” you lean up until your lips barely touch his, “I missed you.” You whisper against his lips. Jungkook smiles and nods his head, he leans down to catch you in a sweet kiss.

Finally, he has you here. For good.

“Need I remind you, I am still here? And waiting for my hug and kiss too.” Jimin winks and you laugh into Jungkook’s kiss.

You finally pull away from Jungkook and he pouts dramatically, he does not want to let go of you ever again. You walk towards Jimin and embrace him fully, his arms go to wrap themselves around you with all his love. You guys sway your bodies back in forth in a tight hug, and you playfully kiss his cheek, making him burst out into giggles.

“Okay, back to me.” Jungkook softly whispers with doe eyes. “Back to me, back to me.” He repeats over and over, holding out his rose for you.

You finally notice the red flower and you start to turn a nice shade of pink as your blush deepens.

“For me?”

“No it’s for me.” Jimin deadpans, “Can you just take his flower already.”

You take a few steps until you’re in front of Jungkook and you reach out for the rose, your fingers brushing against his and even after all this time you feel butterflies fly in swarms in your stomach.

“This is so sweet, Jungkook.” You go in to hug him again and he gratefully embraces you back.

“Red roses symbolize love…” he says shyly, “So I thought it was appropriate.” He pulls back slightly, “I was going to give you a dozen…but I thought taking care of one is work enough already.” He chuckles, scratching the back of his neck.

“We couldn’t even take care of that Venus fly trap.” You remind him with a pointed smile, “So, smart move on your part.”

“Well, guys.” Jimin doesn’t mean to interrupt. “We should get going. Everyone’s probably wondering where we’re at.”

“What do you mean?” you tilt your head, “Where are we going?”

“Surprise.” Jungkook says with a grin. “Let’s go.”

~~~~~~

“Oh my god you guys are crushing me.” You are in the middle of a fucking group hug. Who’s idea was this? For sure Taehyung’s. He, Hobi and Jin are absolutely crushing you as they hug you tightly. Namjoon and Yoongi stand off to the side just waiting patiently for a turn, bless them.

“Because we—” Taehyung begins, “Missed. You.”

“So. Much.” Hobi finishes for him.

“SO MUCH!” Jin yells, “Visiting you once in Japan was not enough.” Jin begins to pull back, Hobi follows his lead but Taehyung continues to smoosh his cheek into your head, squeezing you so tightly it makes you laugh out loud.

“Okay, I believe it is my turn.” You hear Yoongi say calmly. “You can let go now Taehyung.”

“NEVER!” Taehyung giggles, “But fine.”

Yoongi goes in for a rather quick hug, but holds on to your arms as he speaks.

“The record shop was not the same with out you.” He somewhat whispers. “I just had to hear about Tae’s girl problems the whole time.” He teases.

“And Jin was right,” you hear Namjoon walk closer to you, bringing you in for a tight hug. “Visiting once in Japan was not enough.”

“Yeah, I haven’t seen you guys in what? 6 months?”

“And girl, that is too damn long.” You hear her voice cut through and you bubble over with excitement.

“TRINA!” you practically jump in her arms, she laughs that loud ass laugh you love so much and you can’t help but smile.

“And Holly too!” you rush to Holly’s arms, she hugs you back and you feel like everyone is here and you feel so whole.

“Happy?” you hear Jungkook’s voice from beside you. “We thought we would surprise you with a little welcome back party…”

“I’m so happy.” You admit, “Thank you.” You reach for Jungkook’s hand and interlock your fingers with his. “As much as I can’t wait to hang out here with everyone,” you bring your voice down to a whisper. “I also can’t wait until I am home alone with you.”

Jungkook turns a bit red before he’s smirking, squeezing your hand. He leads you to Jin’s backyard where everyone is starting to end up.

“We don’t have to wait until home before you can be alone with me.” Jungkook whispers back, you can hear his teasing tone and it goes straight to your lady bits.

“Be careful.” You warn, “I might take you up on that.”

“God, y/n. I am hoping you do.” He stops at the doorway and pulls you into his body, he grinds he hips into yours and you feel his half hard length.

“What are you thinking about that’s got you so worked up?” you tease, your hands running down his chest.

“You.”

“What about me?”

“Your lips have been on my mind since we got here.”

“Want to kiss me baby?” you press yourself into his chest, tipping your head up.

“So fucking badly.” But before Jungkook can lean down and capture your lips he hears someone’s throat being obnoxiously cleared.

“You guys are so fucking gross. Can’t even check if you’re alone.” Jimin rolls his eyes, he continues walking towards you two with a cup in his hand.

“Why is it always me that you guys always end up making out in front of?” He whines, and you chuckle. Not feeling too embarrassed since it’s just Jimin.

“Sorry, sorry.” You step away from Jungkook and put your hands on your hips. “Where’s my drink, hm?”

“Here, take this one. Not strong enough for me anyway.” Jimin hands you his cup and you roll your eyes with a grin.

“What about me?” Jungkook pouts, “I want a drink too.”

“You’re both fucking babies.” Jimin says with a playful smile, “I’ll make your drink, but you gotta keep me company.”

“Deal.” Jungkook nods his head, “You can go ahead and hang with everyone else baby.”

“Oh, thanks for the permission.” You salute towards him and he waves you off.

You head outside to find everyone else with their own drinks in their hands, chatting away. You find Trina and Holly and go take a seat next to them.

“I have missed you guys so much.” You sip on your drink, “Japan was so cool but nothing beats being home again.”

“We missed you too.” Holly puts a hand on your knee, “We’re so glad you’re back.” She says as she brings her hand back to her body.

“Yeah bitch, never leave us again!” Trina jumps into the conversation, “You should of seen Jungkook, honey. He was so miserable without you.”

And then you’re frowning. You know going abroad was a really tough decision. Especially because you had just gotten into a relationship and just 5 months in you went long distance. Jungkook struggled a lot in the beginning while you were thriving in Japan when you had first arrived. He talked a big game, saying you guys could handle it, saying going a few months at a time without seeing one another wouldn’t be such a big deal but it was…he grew depressed without you.

You nod your head once you get out of your thoughts, you take another sip of your drink and then you hear Taehyung speak up as he walks to you girls.

“He wasn’t that bad guys.” Taehyung assures you. “Maybe in the beginning… but after his first visit with y/n he lit up light a spot light and he got stronger. Plus he had us.” He gestures towards everyone.

You look up at Taehyung and feel immensely grateful…for his words and because he’s right, Jungkook had all of them to lean on.

“So when are you going to do it?” Jimin gives Jungkook a knowing smile, “Here? Some fancy date?” he continues pouring a “couple” shots of Vodka in his cup.

“Why the hell would I do it here? I planned a whole date, of course. I want everything to be fucking perfect.”

“When’s the date?”

“Tomorrow.”

Jimin watches as Jungkook wipes his assumingly sweaty palms on his jeans and he can’t help but softly smile towards his friend.

“It’s going to be fine, Jungkook.” Jimin’s tender voice does little to calm Jungkook though.

“What if she says—”

“She’s going to say yes.” Jimin sets the bottle of vodka down, he swirls his mixed drink with a spoon, giving it a look before shoving it into Jungkook’s hands.

“You need this one more than me.” He laughs, “Listen, just relax.”

“I can’t relax, I want tomorrow to be here already. But I am so nervous. What if things don’t go smoothly at the restaurant? What if—”

“What if it all goes wrong? Really?” Jimin raises a single brow. “But what if it all goes right?” he pats Jungkook’s shoulder. “Just do it when the moment feels right?”

“How will I know when that moment is?” Jungkook bows his head. A frown decorating his face.

“You’ll just know.”

You can’t believe you’re back home with all your friends. You’ve missed this. You don’t regret going abroad at all, you needed it, if you’re being honest. You needed to do something for you no matter what. You needed to go out into the world and experience something wild and new. And Japan was an absolutely perfect experience. Every time Jungkook would visit you two would have such a lovely time, but saying goodbye never got easier.

“What are you thinking about?” Jungkook snuggles you closer to his body, you’re sitting between his legs on the grass on a blanket.

“Oh nothing.” You sing. “Nothing.”

“y/n! Do you want chicken or beef?” You hear Jin ask over the light music filling the backyard.

“Chicken!” you yell back and sink lower to the ground, cuddling closer to Jungkook.

“I’m serious y/n…” Jungkook begins, “You don’t have to wait until we’re home to be alone with me.”

“Follow me inside the house then.” You turn your head to face him and you wink, “I’ll be in the bathroom.”

“The bathroom? Oh, we’re being classy tonight.”

~~~~~

Jungkook’s fingers barely touch you as he skids them down your bare back, you lightly moan at the contact.

“Missed touching you.” He says softly, he fingers now running up your back before they’re sliding back down again.

“Missed being touched by you.” The side of your face is pushed into your pillow as you stare at him. “I missed you so much.”

It’s the next morning, you two are lying naked in your shared bed, the sheets barely covering you. Jungkook continues stroking your back as you lazily close your eyes.

“I’m glad you found a job here.” Jungkook admits, “I don’t think I want to ever be apart from you again.”

“Was it that bad?” you whisper out.

“Baby…no matter what we can get through it but yeah, it sucked.” He chuckles, his fingers graze your skin lower and lower. He lifts the sheets back until your ass is in view, Jungkook kneads the flesh before bringing his hand back and giving you a little spank.

“So, be a good girl and never leave me again.” He goes back to massaging your cheeks and you groan.

“Never again.” You promise. You keep your eyes shut as you enjoy Jungkook’s touch. You roll over to your back, bringing the sheets to your face and you sniff them.

“It feels so good to be home…” you say, “To be with you. In our home. Together.”

Jungkook feels his heart flutter, like a butterfly is taking off and flying towards the big, blue sky.

“Are you happy?” Jungkook asks, “With everything? With…me?”

You crack open one eye to get a look at Jungkook…he’s lying on his side with one arm stretched out to stroke your soft skin and his other arm is holding up his head. He looks so soft and like he has a glow surrounding him.

“So unbelievably happy, my love.” You assure him, “With everything…with you.”

Jungkook eyes expand before they narrow at you and he smirks.

“What about me makes you happy?”

“What about you makes me…?” you begin to laugh lightly. “Can I say everything? Or do I I have to list specific things?”

“I want a list. In alphabetical order, please.” He jokes. “Least to most important.”

“They’re all important!” you close your eyes again. “But okay…A: ass…” you say and Jungkook spanks you again.

“I’m serious y/n.”

“Dude me too, you have such a nice ass.” You point out, “But fine, A: your attitude. Even when things get hard you try to stay positive and it really helps me to be honest…B: body, you are really hot. C: Coc—”

“Okay, I feel like I know where this list is going.” Jungkook cuts you off with a blush. He can’t help but chuckle.

“Really Jungkook, everything. You make me happy when you breathe. Just being here with you makes me happy. You make me laugh all the time, you make me think about life, you make me challenge myself, you push me to do things for me, you support me, you are always honest with me, you…” you take a breath, “You…love me and you don’t make me doubt it for a second.”

Jungkook looks taken aback for a moment, like your words are really surprising him. He continues to glide his hand down your back, feeling your skin beneath his fingertips. Jungkook never wants a moment like this to end. It’s perfect. You look so beautiful here, relaxing after a night out partying and welcome home sex. He thinks this is the most beautiful you’ve ever looked. But to be fair he thinks that a lot.

“Because I do love you.” He finally says, “So much.”

“Trust me, I know. And I love you just as much if not more.”

“That’s impossible.” He leans down to kiss the top of your head. “My love for you is endless, how can you top that?”

“I can live my life trying.”

This is a moment, a special moment. Does he need a fancy dinner date to create a moment like this? Or is this the moment that Jimin was talking about? The moment where he knows.

“y/n…do you want to spend the rest of your life with me?” his tone is soft, tender and shy. Your cheeks get painted a lovely shade of pink as you think of his question.

“Of course I do.”

“No… I mean it. Do you want to spend the rest of your life with me? Me and you forever? Me and you until we move on to the next life, and even then you have to promise to spend that one with me too…”

“Jungkook.” You giggle, “What are you going on about? We already said—”

“You’re it for me.” He admits, “You are without a doubt, the love of my life.” He blinks rapidly as if he were trying to rid himself of any oncoming tears.

“I mean it when I say you are the best thing that’s happened to me.” His lip slightly quivers and you reach up to caress his face.

“Baby,” you begin. “I love you.”

“Then…” Jungkook draws his hand that was stroking you to his body, he scratches the back of his neck and smiles shyly. “Will you spend the rest of your life with me?”

“Yes.”

“Then let’s make it official.” He says and you grow slightly confused. Jungkook stands from the bed and heads to the closet. You lay here wondering what the hell he is doing, is he putting on clothes? But he walks back out still naked, with something behind his back.

He comes to your side of the bed and gets down on both knees, he scoots closer to the bed until he’s face to face with you.

“Want to marry me?” he asks, reaching for your hand. His other hand holds a small box and your eyes grow twice their size. There’s no way he’s…

“Jungkook…” you breathe out, “Are you proposing?”

“Well, I have a ring. And I quite literally asked if you wanted to marry me. So yes?” he chuckles and you gasp.

“We don’t have to get married for a while. But being engaged and planning a future could be nice.” He suggests and you want to faint. You were not expecting this. Not so soon anyway. But he’s right, you don’t have to plan a wedding and get married right away. And he is without a doubt the love of your life as well.

“Jungkook.” You choke on his name, “Yes.” Jungkook sucks in a sharp breath…you said yes? His shocked expression slowly morphs into something much more soft. He takes your hand and he’s slipping the ring on your finger.

“Mine.” He says with a timid smile.

You stare down at your hand with the sparkly jewelry accompanying your finger.

“It’s so beautiful.” You say somewhat surprised.

“To be honest, Jimin really helped.” He admits with a laugh. “And by helped I mean he picked it out.”

“Figures.” You giggle and you reach for him, your hands on either sides of his cheeks as you bring him in for a kiss.

“You really want to marry me?” you raise a brow at him and he gives you his dopiest most in love bunny grin he can manage.

“I wouldn’t marry anyone else.”

“Good, me either.” You peck his lips again, “You want a whole life with me?”

“I want you in this life, the next life, the life after that…”

He plants kisses all over your face and you laugh.

“Want to marry you y/n. Want to adopt a pet with you…want to put a baby in you…want to grow old with you…” he says all between kisses.

“A-A baby?”

“One day. Multiple times.” He grins, kissing you again. “Don’t you want that?”

“Yes.” You say breathless. “One day.”

“I just really want you forever, you know?” Jungkook whispers. “Do you think you would like that?”

“Babe, I would love that.” You bring him in for another kiss, then you open your eyes and they travel to the ring on your hand. “And we just made that our plan.”

[transmascfrankiero]

all of mcr’s songs ranked out of ten based on whether or not you can strip to them:

romance: could work if you were going for a Super Melancholy smiths-esque vibe but overall too slow and pretty. 1/10

honey: headbanger soundtrack to showcase your revenge body to ur ex. bonus points for underlying ‘gonna murder shitty boyfriend’ context thanks to audition-inspired video. but slightly too angry to be seductive. 5/10

vampires: too goth, too many feelings. reminds me of pot dreads frank. would not work. 0/10

drowning lessons: this song is cursed and cannot be listened to in public unfortunately 0/10

sorrows: if u were going to do a strip routine while beating the shit out of someone for trying to stealing ur tip money this would be a gr8 choice 6/10

halos: it’s about blowing your own head off and taking too many pills to cope w/ wanting to die all the time. 0/10

turnstiles: please do not!!! strip!!! to a song!!! about 9/11!!!! what is wrong w/ you!!! -100000000/10

monroeville: if u were doing a private lil strip dance for your george a. romero-obsessed s.o. where u both cry over the idea of having to kill the other person b/c they turned into a zombie then sure??? but other than that no. .5/10

best day ever: ehhhhhh. too fast. kinda weird to get sexy to unless u have a hospital kink. 0/10

cubicles: wow the thought of doing a strip routine to a song about pining for ur coworker who doesn’t know u exist is too sad to even joke about -20/10

demolition lovers: it’s a long song but it’s got cool tempo changes for variety and if u got the stamina then go for it. 4/10

helena: so, like, i get it. it’s a bop. u could dance to this beat for sure. the costumes and color scheme from the video make for gr8 stage pictures and the dancing corpse lady is v pretty. i could understand why if u were doing an emo strip routine u would want to use helena. but please for the love of all that is holy do NOT strip to a song gerard way wrote about his dead grandmother okay i am BEGGING you -∞/10

give ‘em hell kid: FUCK YEAH YOU LOOK PRETTY WALKIN DOWN THE STREET IN THE BEST DAMN DRESS U OWN. 10/10

to the end: this would be a hilarious choice for a bachelor party ngl 7/10 for that alone

prison: absolutely you could strip to this song but u gotta COMMIT okay u gotta light something on fire onstage and challenge gender norms while screaming your head off 8/10 but only if ur not a coward

i’m not okay: it’s a bop, but can u strip to it? no. 0/10

ghost of you: mikey way did not die on a beach in fake normandy for u to strip to ghost of you. seek help -5/10

jetset life: dude this song like. actually works??? for a strip routine??? so long as you don’t actually listen to the words, from a musical perspective, u could totally strip to this 10/10

interlude: what kinda weird catholic shame kink do u need to have to strip to this song. also it’s too short and too pretty. -5/10 (unless ur into catholic shame idk)

venom: this would require such a high energy routine but if u can make being sweaty work then this is a gr8 choice 7/10

hang ‘em high: this is a BATSHIT INSANE choice for a strip routine but if u want to do it then PLEASE do. i like ur style. 8/10

deathwish: u can strip to this only if u introduce ur routine by dedicating it to everyone who ever said eyeliner on dudes was gay. 5/10

cemetery drive: i think not. 0/10

never told you: if u are a highly theatrical highly murderous stripper then yes definitely 7/10

desert song: this song is Way Too Beautiful to strip to sorry you can’t have it -300/10

the end.: the only sexy thing about this song is how good gerard’s voice sounds so no. 0/10

dead!: this is a bold fucking choice but u have to play your cards just right. high risk high reward but SO much to potentially get wrong 6/10

how i disappear: u could. but why. 2/10

sharpest lives: holy SHIT yes ABSOLUTELY u should strip to sharpest lives. the drama. the beat. the spy rock guitar that frank accidentally nailed. this is one of THE choicest options from their catalog. why aren’t u stripping to this right now 50000000/10

wttbp: cute idea but don’t actually 0/10

i don’t love you: again, a bold fucking choice. u could strip to this in an edgy, meta sort of way but it’s missing the trashy factor so it’d have to be part performance art and part strip routine. if ur into that then totally 5/10

house of wolves: i mean i would pay money to see someone strip to this song so 7/10

cancer: LMAO YIKES -2000000/10

mama: this would be GLORIOUS if u fully embraced the sheer insanity and went Bonkers in Fuckin Zonkers burlesque-show-in-hell w/ it. 100/10 but u gotta pound the floor wailing at some point

sleep: i’m conflicted on this one like on the one hand it’s a good tempo for stripping but on the other hand it’s a song about being cruel to ur loved ones in order to force distance between u and them b/c you’re terrified of them getting hurt and it being all your fault. so maybe don’t strip to this one actually 0/10

teenagers: a bop w/ a great beat and fun costume ideas from the video but two major drawbacks being 1. ur getting naked to a song about teenagers which is uhhhh sort of Inappropriate and 2. it’s kind of also about school shooters which is also Inappropriate to get naked to. 0/10

disenchanted: why would u want this. you sad fuck. idek what to say except if you want to strip to this song i’m crying on your behalf -100000000/10

famous last words: don’t????? don’t. Do Not. stop that. -12/10

blood: this is HILARIOUS omg please strip to blood 10/10

kill all your friends: sure?? no objections but it’s an odd choice. this goes for the demo too. 2/10

heaven help us: if u want to strip to this then you definitely just read unholyverse for the first time and while u are valid, Don’t 0/10

my way home is through you: not an especially sexy song but it’s fun!! you do you 3/10

astro zombies (cover): uhhhhhh it’s a no from me dawg. i’d be thinking about danzig, like, the whole time. 0/10

desolation row: sure but u gotta be willing to get punched in the face by the riot squad for maximum effect 4/10

common people (cover): just b/c gerard would strip to britpop doesn’t mean u can. 0/10

emily: NO!!!! -50000/10

party at the end of the world: nah. 0/10

not that kind of girl: literally please consider the subject matter of this song and rethink ur life choices. -10/10

all the angels: it’s a cool song but don’t strip to it that’s weird -2/10

jack the ripper: you and the person who wants to strip to astro zombies can go sit in the suicidegirls corner together how about that. 0/10

na na na: a banger!! strip away my friend 9/10

bulletproof heart: a good song but not a strip song 1/10

sing: sorry this song is [REDACTED] it gets no score

planetary (go!): you could try to strip to this but it’s such a classic four-on-the-floor that i think you’d end up just regular dancing to it and forget to be sexy so 4/10

the only hope for me is you: are you doing a strip tease for michael bay. stop. put ur shirt back on shia lebeouf 0/10

party poison: like this is a hilarious option and i support you but realistically it’s pretty fast for a strip song 3/10

save yourself, i’ll hold them back: this is a safe option. Too Safe. almost soulless. a person who’d strip to this would avoid eye contact the entire time and never smile and later when you went out for a smoke break you’d overhear them on the phone with their ex arguing over child support payments. 4/10

s/c/a/r/e/c/r/o/w: the more i think about it the more fun the idea of stripping to this becomes so i say go for it 6/10

summertime: i’m Certain that gerard would prefer if you didn’t -5/10

destroya: is this objectively the best mcr song to strip to? Absolutely. it’s got everything you could possibly want right down to built-in moans and fever dream drums. but the only person in the universe who Can Must and Should strip to this song is gerard. sorry them’s the breaks. ∞/10 but only if you’re gerard way

kids from yesterday: don’t. 0/10

vampire money: 100% yes you should strip to this. bonus points for stealth twilight references 1000000/10

we don’t need another song about california: do i like this song? yes. is it sexy? no. 0/10

black dragon fighting society: i can’t understand what the FUCK gerard is saying in this song AT ALL so i can’t recommend that u strip to it b/c i have no fucking idea what it’s ABOUT 0/10

f.t.w.w.w.: i mean. this song is about eating pussy. and robots that are built specifically to fuck. so yes you can strip to this but you gotta dress up like a pornbot 100/10

mastas of ravencroft: again i cannot understand most of the fucking words and the ones i do understand are something something RICKETY BONES RICKETY HANDS so like. probably not the one 0/10

boy division: i could go either way on this one like it’s really fast but it’s also about cocaine so??? 3/10

tomorrow’s money: while this song slaps overall violent nihilism does not a strip song make 1/10

ambulance: no. 0/10

gun.: antiwar messages are sexy but not the right kind for stripping 1/10

the world is ugly: PLEASE no. 0/10

the light behind your eyes: oh my god this is so DEPRESSING why would you want to strip to this who hurt you -2000000/10

kiss the ring: yes yes yes it’s got built-in audience participation conceit factor if u let ur audience kiss ur ring, totally works 10/10

make room!!!: again, slaps, but not a strip song 1/10

surrender the night: dude we talked about this!!! dying violently w/ ur loved ones is Not Sexy!!! 0/10

burn bright: i guess you could strip to this but again it’s Too Safe tread carefully 3/10

fake your death: i want frank iero to strip to this song so i can throw tomatoes at him for being a LYING SACK OF SHIT FOR TWO YEARS i’m not gonna rate this one but frank if ur out there i have a basket of slightly squishy heirloom tomatoes and i am COMING FOR YOU

[heyheydidjaknow]

Three cheers to publishing on time. Can I get a what what? Anyways, here’s the next chapter. The previous chapter is at the bottom of this chapter. Go figure.

Chapter 3

“Okay, I think I got it.” It is possible you are going stir crazy. You would not be surprised if you were, but you have more pressing matters that, ridiculously, involve the timeline of fucking Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2012. You had not just stood the headassery of season four and five, but conquered it, tamed it, if you will. You do not remember the last time you ate. “So the only way I’m going to survive this series is if I somehow, through some sort of spiritual bullshit, get to become at least somewhat adept at ninjitsu.” You sigh. “But the only reason he trained her is because of her psychic bullshit.”

You stumble towards the kitchen to eat for the first time in days. “Actually, you know what? Fuck that.” You open the refrigerator, salivating at the food. “I’m just gonna buy a fucking gun. Dodge bullets, bitch.” You pull out a large slab of meat, tossing it on the counter. “If they aren’t going to actually incapacitate people, I will.”

A sudden thought stops you in your tracks. “Wait, so, what timeline am I on?” You feel your heart drop. “Because if we’re doing the whole thing…” You shake your head. “You know what? Prepare for the best and accept—that’s backwards.”

You put the meat back. Something about the existential dread kills your appetite. You crawl back into bed, close your eyes. ‘How long have I been in here?’ The time had admittedly swirled in on itself, your brain completely fried from all the contemplating death. ‘At least long enough to be in the no-man’s-land where I’m not hungry.’

You freeze up at the sound of knocking on your window.

Your eyes slowly pan over to the covered glass. You rise to your feet.

You shake your head, trying to remember to think rationally. ‘This place is very high off the ground for a stalker.’ Despite yourself, you quickly go to the kitchen, grabbing the largest frying pan you can find and slowly approaching the window.

‘There isn’t even a proper ledge out there. You’re being paranoid.’ Slowly, you reach for the curtain, yanking it open.

You scream at the sight of the hanging figure, only realizing you recognized said figure after a couple seconds. Thoroughly embarrassed— ‘Yeah, I could never be a ninja.’—you slide the window open, face red. “What do you want, Raphael?”

He wears a shit eating grin. “What, scared?”

“Of a shadowy figure in my window? Yes.” You sit back down on the bed, voice cold. “You gonna just hang out there or what?”

He climbs inside. “Alright, so here’s the situation.” He sits on the windowsill; you feel the secondhand vertigo. “Donnie—first of all, where have you been?”

“Binging the most traumatic part of your lives so far on my phone so you and your brothers don’t get killed by swole Shredder.”

His face went pale. “Shredder?”

You blink, a factor you had admittedly completely forgotten becoming apparent. “You don’t know he intends to come to the city,” you remember. “That’s—”

“He what?”

You sigh. “He is the least of your concerns at this particular moment. What about Donatello?”

“No, back up.” His smile was completely gone. “When is he getting here?”

You shrug. “I dunno.”

“You don’t know?”

You put your hands up at his obvious rage. “Dude, it is honestly not that big of a deal right now. He doesn’t even get close to killing your dad until the end of season two.”

You are decidedly not helping matters. “He gets close to—”

“Are you gonna repeat everything I say or are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

“I’m gonna—what?” Raph is quite clearly not taking this news well.

You try to calm him down. “Take a deep breath, alright? It might not get to that point, but you have to tell me what’s going on first.”

He growls in frustration but follows your instructions. “Mikey found out that he can apparently talk to people online, and he found this site where he can talk to—”

“I’m gonna stop you right there.” You pick up your phone, typing away. “You can’t, under any circumstance, let him go talk to Bradford.”

“Well, I know it would be bad--”

“You misunderstand.” You get up, starting to grab your things. “Bradford is working for the Shredder.”

This seems to be news. “He’s what?”

“Working for Shredder.”

“But he’s—how?”

“You have bigger concerns than the how, currently.” You read the page you had pulled up again. “How long ago did he find this guy?”

“Yesterday, I think.”

“Then… hold on.” You read the summary of the episode in question more thoroughly. “Okay, so we aren’t totally fucked, but we gotta make sure he doesn’t see him again.”

“Wait, hold on.” He walks after you as you try to find your jacket. “Why? How could Shredder—”

“If he goes, he’s gonna talk to him about general shit, right?” You slip it on. “At some point, in return for learning his secret bullshit, he’s gonna want info on you and your dad.”

“Then the Shredder will know where we are!” The horror in his eyes is apparent.

“Exactly.” You pull on your shoes. “That, and you’ll have to confront foot soldiers, which isn’t good for anyone.”

“Wait, is Mikey gonna be alright?”

“I mean, he gets kidnapped, but—”

“We’re going. Right now.”

“Awesome.” You were already one foot out the door. “Close the window on your way out.”

You rush down to the first floor of the building, nodding acknowledgement to the door man as you look up and down the street. ‘He has a dojo or something, right?’ You try googling his dojo, only to find that, not only is it a chain, but that they are all incredibly spread out. ‘It’s at times like these,’ you contemplate, running towards the closest one, ‘that I wish I could drive.’

It takes you about 10 minutes of running to get to the place, only for it to be closed. You feel tempted to throw your phone.

‘Wait, when does it—hold on.’ You already hate timelines. You sit down on the curb, pulling your phone out again to find some clips. ‘So, Chris and Mikey meet up some time after patrol, order pizza, and then it’s sunrise.’ You look up at the slowly lightening sky. ‘Okay, so that means they’re currently ordering, right? Because it was clearly dark in that last scene.’ You put your head in your hand. ‘I mean, it is, right? Because those are just wall separator things, not windows, since the sky was very clearly green in that next scene.’ You get to your feet. ‘So I just need to find that billboard with that specific graffiti and main message and we’re good to go, right?’ You groan. ‘But there have to be a thousand billboards in fucking NYC.’

You stop, smiling slightly at the graffiti. ‘Is that not a purple dragon?’ You grin, going back to running. ‘I just need to get to Chinatown, right? Is that their territory?’ You swallow, turning a street corner. ‘I guess we’ll find out.’

The buildings tower around you as you wander the streets, the quiet desolation ringing in your ears with the force of a gong. The pounding of your feet against the pavement does little to stifle the silence. The gang in question may not be a challenge or concern for vigilantes, but to you? You are barely a flower now, bright and beautiful and oh so easy to crush. But you cannot and will not stand still for long. The walls of the alleys you run crush your sides and the darkness strangles you, but despite the beating of your heart begging you to stop, you cannot. How can you?

You can stop what comes next. That is what fuels you. Never mind the fact you must stumble to a halt to vomit into the nearest dumpster who knows how many times, the taste of acid staining your tongue. You can rewrite history.

But you cannot.

You walk around for approximately too long before correctly citing that this is, in fact, futile. You start to panic.

You turn back around. ‘He goes back to talk to his brothers, right?’ You feel your body start to shake. You keep your phone to your ear, pretending to talk to someone as you run around like a headless chicken so as to not get bothered, hopefully. ‘Then I still have a chance to catch him before he leaves, right? At least he won’t get kidnapped.’ You look around quickly, slipping into an alleyway and prying off a manhole cover, climbing into the sewer. You pull the cover back into place and start running along them, the smell nauseating in the darkness suffocating. ‘Please tell me I remember where this stupid lair is.’

You laugh in relief when you see the abandoned subway, sprinting down the tunnel. ‘I can catch him,’ you promise yourself. ‘I can catch him before—’

You slam into someone. They grab your wrist before you fall. “Yo, are you alright?”

“Mikey!” You feel your whole body relax, but the relief is quickly squashed. ‘Thank fuck.’ You grab his shoulders. “You can’t see Bradford again.”

“Wait, what?” He groaned. “Did Raph set you up to this?”

“What? No!” As the adrenaline and panic start to wear off, you feel your body begin to falter at the excessive strenuous physical activity, panic, no food or water for two days and sleep deprivation. You dig your fingernails into your palms to try to keep yourself grounded. “He just said that you were friends with him or something and I went looking for you!”

“Look,” he sighed, letting go of you and not noticing the obvious slur in your voice, “I get it, alright? Not all of us can have a super awesome friend like Chris—”

“He’s working for Shredder, dipshit.” You feel the ground spinning as your skull rips itself apart. “Coolness be gone, that bitchass Dogpound fucker.” You have no idea what you are saying. ‘Huh,’ you muse, struggling to stay on your feet. ‘Usually, it takes longer than this to shut down.’

“Shredder?” You cannot feel things, so you have no idea what his actual reaction is. “He’s here?”

“Yep.” And with that, you collapse.

--

Suffice it to say, when you wake up, you feel like absolute shit, with a pounding headache, extreme fatigue, and an obvious desire to not move from the bed in which you lay.

Thinking hurts. You decide against it for the time being.

You hear typing, soft muttering, the scratching of pencil against paper. You do not want to open your eyes; whatever you are laying under is warm. You try flexing your fingers. You can, but it is barely worthy of being called a twitch. You feel sick and gross and sticky and like you are eating yourself from the inside out, but you are also very aware that moving will not help matters. Besides, what small part of you is not covered is absolutely freezing.

You let out a soft groan from a particularly egregious pound from your head. You hear the typing stop.

“Y/N?” Donatello’s voice is incredibly soft. “Are you alright?”

You do not answer. Your throat feels like it is filled with sand.

“Oh, right.” You feel the mattress shift under you. “You—right.” He clears his throat. “You, uh, probably want to know what happened, right?”

You find yourself in between sleep and consciousness. You do not exactly understand what he’s saying, but his voice is pleasant to listen to.

“Mikey carried you back,” he explains. “He said you started talking about Chris Bradford working for The Shredder and collapsed.” A pause. “Leo thought it would be a good idea to go take him down since he already spilled the beans.”

‘You aren’t helping.’ “Everyone got out alright.” He is writing something. “We don’t know how much Shredder knows or how he found us; Master Splinters said that the war has just begun or something to that effect.” He pauses again. His voice is almost hesitant now. “If you spoke, I’d ask how…how this ends, who wins the day.” He chuckles dryly. “Now that I say it out loud, I guess it’s pretty clear that you wouldn’t tell me, would you? Rightfully so, I guess; I don’t know exactly how that sort of information might change things. Still,” he sighs, “it is so… so frustrating, having information just out of reach, especially for someone like me. But you—… you probably know that too, don’t you?”

It is not as if you can refute what he says.

He clears his throat. “A-anyways,” he rambled, voice tight with awkwardness, “sorry for ranting. This would be totally embarrassing if you weren’t so clearly incapable of coherent thought.” You hear the shuffling of paper. “As far as your health is concerned,” he continues, “without being able to take a blood test for obvious reasons, I can only conclude based on a totally-not-creepy physical exam that you’re just incredibly malnourished and exhausted. I don’t really have anything to actually prescribe you, but ya know… eat. Drink, too; just perform basic bodily functions.”

He looks down at you from his seat at the foot of his bed, your eyes having fluttered shut again. “I…” he took a breath, starting again. “Remember what you said the other day? About me being able to kill you with my bare hands?” He looks back over at the line of code he is working on, ignoring the minute shaking in his hands. “I remember… do I kill someone?” He swallows, eyes focusing on the letters in front of him. “I can’t really imagine it, why I’d want to.” He covers his face with his hands. “I know I’m a ninja, but it’s just—” He feels his voice start to rise. His eyes focus on your sleeping face; he calms back down for your sake. His words are slow and deliberate. “I always thought that we were doing all this for a fight we’d never have, that we would never have to do something like that, because… well, I don’t remember why, but I just—…” His voice dies in his throat.

‘Staring at her like this is creepy.’ He stands up, gathering his things. ‘You can’t get yourself worked up over something like this. You just met her, and your hesitance is not anyone’s problem but yourself.’ “Just…” Despite himself, he mumbles out a soft plea. “Please, don’t let me do something stupid.” He does not know who he’s talking to

He slips out of the room.

You would not remember this happened.

He would.

Table Of Contents

Chapter 2

Chapter 4

[ofhoneyandrosepetals]

Summer Roads - Chapter 3

Pairing: Sean x Fem! reader

Description: You’ve always been Lyla’s best friend, but since Sean moved you became an inseparable trio. But who could say that, after all these years together, you would start growing feelings for Sean?

Warning: swearings only.

Word count: 2.049

A/N: is it allowed to use the same gif from the first chapter? I think so lol it just gives the best Sean’s vibes.

“I need to get some stuff first,” Sean said as you got near Lyla’s place.

“Yeah, me too,” you said.

“Okay then, I’ll prepare things. And by that I mean my mom,” Lyla responds.

“But she loves us,” you say frowning.

“Even so,” Lyla shrugs.

“Care if I go with you to pick your stuff up? I need to give Daniel that thing I promised,” you ask Sean.

“Yeah, cool. I’ll go with you to pick up your stuff too,” you were too busy looking at Sean to notice the look on Lyla’s face. “I need to give that board a new update.”

Hearing this made your heart pound a little - Sean meant the little whiteboard you had in your room for important notes, but those important notes turned out to be Sean’s drawings. Sometimes he would draw something simple, and other times he would make something clever and funny. It was a nice Easter egg feeling - you never knew what was coming. 

*

At your house, you grabbed your sleeping bag and old clothes to use as pajama. A little necessaire followed the pack as well. 

“Shit, I don’t know where I put it…” you thought out loud.

“That thing for Daniel?” Sean turned his head from the whiteboard. “What is it, anyway?”

“A stuffed animal…” you say focused in your search, looking behind pillows and under the bed.

“A stuffed animal? You do know he’s seven already, right?” Sean said with a grin.

“Sorry, I forgot my basic math lessons,” he chuckled in response. “It’s Power Bear, but since I don’t play with it for a long time I asked Daniel if he wanted it.”

“Of course he did.”

“I think it’s cute a seven year old boy still wants a stuffed animal.”

“Daniel is always cute,” Sean said in a low tone and you thought you felt a little resentment there. Shrugging the feeling off, you focus yourself once again in your search. “Try in the corner by the window. Where the toy chest is. You always lost things there as a kid.”

“But I don’t have any toy in there anymore,” you say as you open the chest.

Sean, once finished with the drawing, grims and goes to the toy chest, moves it a little bit and then raises his eyebrows at you. You roll your eyes, knowing what was behind there.

“Thanks,” you say as you get the stuffed Power Bear.

“At your service. Are you all packed up? I mean, I don’t want to rush you or anything…”

“Nah, I’m good. Just lemme grab some chips.”

“Don’t you dare let Lyla hear this.”

“Cheetos are not chips,” you imitate her. Sean laughs.

“They really are not.”

“I know, but I just can't stop saying it that way. But I don’t have Cheetos, anyway. It’s Doritos.”

“We didn’t had that discussion yet.”

“And I don’t look forward to have it. Let’s go.”

Before going out of your room you give a quick look to Sean’s update on your board. He made a drawing of the two of you at the skate ramp.

“That’s really nice,” you point out. “But where’s Lyla?”

“The little dot back there,” you laugh.

“We agree to not let her see this, right?”

“You bet.”

*

Arriving at Sean’s house, Daniel storms out of his room.

“Did you bring Y/N? That’s so cool! Is she sleeping here?” Daniel says all excited.

“Hey, goofball,” you greet him. “I brought ya something.”

“Really? What is it, what is it?” The little boy starts bouncing. You pull out the stuffed Power Bear and Daniel goes wild. “Wooooow…! That Power Bear you told me about!” He said in amazement. “Oh, he’s fluffy,” he chuckles after he pokes the toy.

“It’s yours, you do know that, right?” You say to him. Daniel gives a shy look.

“I remember you said so.”

“He was just afraid that you’ve might forgotten. Or changed your mind,” Sean said.

“I was not!”

“Yes you were.”

“Oh, here we go,” you breathes out. “Danny? It’s yours.”

“Yay!” He grabs the toy and hugs your legs - actually what he can reach at his height.

“What do you say…?”

“Thanks!” Daniel say as he run to his room again.

“I swear that sometimes…” Sean begins to say, but you put a hand on his arm.

“That’s fine, Sean. He’s a kid.”

“I know, I know… it’s just… sometimes it’s hard to live with him everyday.”

“That muffin? You joking me?”

“Wanna trade?”

“I’m hearing this,” Daniel’s head appear outside his room, pouting.

“Good,” Sean says. “Is dad home?”

“Garage.”

“I’ll just let him know that we’ll be sleeping over at Lyla,” of course you paid attention to the whole phrase, but the we got to stick for a little longer.

“I’ll go with you.”

You enjoyed the Diaz garage, even though you didn’t understand shit about cars or knew what tools were those.

“Hey! If it isn’t Y/N,” Esteban greets you.

“Hi, Esteban,” you wave a shy hand at him. “How you doing?”

“Just good,”

“Hey, dad,” Sean interrupts. “We’re gonna have a sleepover at Lyla, is that okay?”

“Sure, mijo,” suddenly worry takes over Estaban’s face. “Y/N, I think your knee is bleeding.”

“Oh,” you completely forgot about your injury. “It’s fine, it’s just a scratch. I tripped with my roller skate, but luckily Sean was my superhero.”

“Was he?” You didn’t know if it was because of your crush on Sean, but you could swear for everything in this world that Esteban’s eyes sparkled a little. Maybe.

“Hey, let’s cut it out,” Sean says, his hand scratching his head. 

“But I’m not gonna let you leave my house until someone takes care of that scratch,” Esteban says.

“There’s no need to, really.”

“I’ll do it,” Sean says quickly. Esteban was smiling.

“Really?” You ask.

“Yeah, c’mon. Things are in the bathroom.”

*

Going upstairs, you insist to Sean that there’s is no need to take care of your knee.

“Let me just clean it then, you can’t go around while a bloody knee.”

“Actually I thought we were doing just fine,” walking in front of you, you didn’t need to look at his face to know Sean rolled his eyes. It was a thing that you could even hear. 

You sat on the edge of the bathtub, waiting for Sean as he looked in the cabinet for the things he needed, trying not give away your nervousness. He’s just going to clean your scratch, it’s not a big deal. Lyla could do the same thing, you kept thinking to yourself.

“What’s on your mind? You look so thoughtful,” you heard Sean’s voice. 

“Oh,” you jumped on your seat. “Nothing, nothing. I was just… zoning out.”

“I’m kinda nervous about this, I don’t wanna hurt you,” you could see Sean’s hands wasn’t as steady as they used to be, but you believed him, innocently. 

“You won’t hurt me, at least not as much as I already am,” he smiled.

“I’m not one to brag, but sometimes I take care of Daniel’s scratches as well.”

“So it’s in your résumé,” you say jokingly. Sean only smiled, since he started cleaning your knee attentively.

You swallowed dry as you kept your attention on him. Sean was being very serious on his task, but his hands were a little shaky indeed. You could barely feel the liquid burning on your skin, and you give the credits for that to your fucked up feelings. Maybe Sean’s hands had something to do with it too - they were hands of an artist, after all. He knew how to be delicate.

“How does it feel?” He asks.

“It’s fine. I’m not feeling it much.”

“I’m all finished here, just lemme put a bandage.”

“I don’t need it, Sean,” you protest.

“At least for today, Y/N,” since you don’t answer, Sean looks up at you. He holds your look. “I know you’re stubborn, but only for today,” you don’t give up on your principles. Sean takes a deep breath. “Gosh, you’re just like Daniel sometimes. Please, Y/N,” Sean pressures the bridge of his nose, trying to keep his patience. 

But there was no time for anything else, because a little goofball stormed inside the bathroom, holding stuffed Power Bear and another toy you didn’t recognize.

“Swooooosh,” Daniel made the toys fly. “You will never catch me, Power Bear!”

“Daniel!” Sean shouted.

“I’ll call my reinforcements!”

“Daniel!” Sean tried again, but Daniel came up to running around the bathroom.

“There is it!” Daniel pointed a stuffed Power Bear to you. “My reinforcements are here! Prepare to lose!” Daniel ran to your direction, knocking you down inside the bathtub.

“Oh my god,” you say laughing as Daniel fell on top of you, his little arms tangled in yours.

“Daniel!” Sean kept trying.

“You’ll never beat me, Power Bear!” Daniel sat on top of you and started playing with his toys again.

“For fuck sake, Daniel!” Sean lost it, his voice raising tones and more tones. You looked surprised at him, as well as Daniel, who turned. “Get out of her…”

“You never let me have fun!” Daniel complained.

“You always have all the fun, Daniel! Now get out.”

“But I wanna play with Y/N…”

“She can’t, she’s hurt.”

“Sean…” you try to reason.

“Really? Where?” Daniel started turning your head, looking for anything. You giggled.

“I scratched my knee, goofball. But I’m fine, it’s not that big of a deal.”

“See, Sean? She says she’s fine.”

“Still need a bandage, though,” Sean says pouting.

“Oh, you can have one of mine! It has Hawt Dawg Man!”

“That’s neat, Danny. Would you put it for me?”

“Yes!” Daniel leaves the bathtub and goes to his room. Sean gives you a hand to get up.

“I can’t fucking believe him…”

“Shh, he’s coming.”

“Here! See?, it’s big. I’ll put upside down so you can see Hawt Dawg Man.”

“Thanks, dude,” you ruffled his hair. 

“Any reinforcements of Power Bear is my friend too.”

“Oh, so I was the reinforcement?”

“We gotta go to, Daniel. Say bye to her as I get my stuff.”

*

“I can’t believe it,” Sean complains as you two go down the street.

“Sean, you need to be more understanding with him.”

“I know, but it’s so hard. And you don’t make it easier too. I was trying my ass off to put a bandage on you and you only accept when Daniel suggests it,” you would be lying if you said that Sean’s words didn’t hurt you a bit. On normal times this wouldn’t affect you, but now everything is different.

“I’m sorry, Sean, but your brother is just the cutest thing.”

“Tell me about it.”

“I’m sorry I upset you.”

“What?” Sean looked at you surprised. “You… you didn’t upset me, not exactly.”

“So what is it?”

“It’s… I don’t know, it’s nothing,” he shrugged.

“You don’t need to be jealous of Daniel.”

“I’m not,” he says as he rolls his eyes.

“Yeah, right,” you say ironically and put a hand on his shoulder. “But thank you for taking care of my knee. If you had offered me a bandage of Hawt Dawg Man before maybe I would’ve accepted way sooner.”

“So that’s what it was all about, huh?” Sean grinned.

“Sure.”

It wasn’t news that sometimes Sean would be jealous of Daniel when he got in the middle of you and Lyla, trying to get your attention and playing with you. You never had a sibling to know how the feeling was and what really happened there, but today it was a little weird, if you could say so.

Maybe Sean got angry because Daniel started to make a mess, but you thought it was so adorable that you could never think that. You frowned as you stared at the asphalt. 

“You’re zoning out again. What’s up with you?”

“I’m just looking at my new awesome bandage,” you lie.

“With that look? I would say you’re trying to make it disappear,” you laugh and slaps his arm with the back of your hand. 

“C’mon let’s just go to Lyla’s. She’s probably wondering why are we taking so long.”

“I’ll blame Daniel for that.”

“Of course you will, Big Brother of the Year.”

[ladybugsfanfics]

Shut Up And Kiss Me [11/?]

Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x reader

Style: Multichapter

WC: 2k

Warnings: mention of blackout, exstreme awkwardness, 

Summary: You and Professor Hiddleston have been colleagues for many years now, and through those years the hatred for each other has only grown. Now, as a new school year starts, you’re being told that you have to share a classroom or a class. Neither are happy about the outcome, but knowing you’ll never come to an agreement, you let the class choose for you. Team-teaching is rare in 2019, but it is a lot harder to do when you can’t stand the person you’re doing it with. 

A/N: aaaa, i have been so absent, I know. This has taken forever, but now I can promise you I’m gonna be back. Not only will this, hopefully be updated more often (I have inspiration), but I also got like a ton of writing mojo (wrote 4k words yesterday) and a Loki!Piarate au is soon done and i have other shits, my requests are becoming easier though turns out they’re getting long. Anyways, I hope this can please you and I hope to be able to post more in the coming time. I love you all so much ^_^ P.S. it’s close to christmas and a christmas party... ;)

Previous | Seires Masterlist | Part Twelve

You can’t place the feeling. Not really. All you know is that something feels… off. Wrong. 

It’s Sunday, three days since halloween and you met Emma’s friends. Even though that was fun and all, the night could have been better had you stuck with the people you know. Not only would you be able to continue to get Tom being nice (which had your heart race a mile a minute), but you could also, maybe, have more fun seeing as you wouldn’t panic everytime you said something. 

However, three days later, something feels off. You’re not even sure if it has anything to do with Halloween (if it has anything to do with Tom lending you his coat because you were barely dressed in your costume),  or if it has something to do with the fact that you have no recollection of what you did last night. 

All you know is that something is not as it should be. 

You try to shake off the feeling and reach for your phone, where it lies on your nightstand. The clock on it reads 07.39 AM and you curse your annoying drunk self for always making sure you wake up early―it’s not that you go to bed early, no rather late actually (like you gotta stay up ‘til at least 3 AM), but more that whenever you do get drunk, you actually fall asleep right away and you actually sleep. Maybe that’s the cure. 

Despite wanting to continue your slumber, you decide to get up. Maybe you can figure out what’s giving you this feeling of something being amiss. 

One slightly wrong, though not that surprising, thing lies on your couch. Y/BFF/N has their face half planted in one of your pillows, though the angle works for them to breathe. One arm hangs loosely off the couch and their legs have tangled themselves in a blanket, where one is thrown over the back of the couch. You have no idea how that can be comfortable, and you bet they’ll tell you how much they regret it when they wake up. 

Yet, you know that’s not the feeling that haunts you. Seeing your best friend crashing on your couch is not a rare sight, though it is becoming rarer as time passes. 

Nothing is amiss in your apartment. Everything where you left it when you went out last night, even the now half-full bottle of wine you opened before leaving that sits on your countertop. 

The mystery continues, but the answers are not in your apartment. One thing’s for sure, you’re not about to go out and find out. 

Before you decide to check any messages or notifications, you find a glass, fill it with water and down it in seconds. Pulling your head back you become aware of the ache in it, and with the water helping you clear your mind a little, the pounding slowly creeps into a loud drum. 

Okay, so you’re not getting away from being hungover. Good to know. 

Not being able to focus with the drums really taking off in your head, you rush to the bathroom and find aspirin. You take two and swallow them with another glass of water. It’s gonna take a little while before they help so you slide down the bathroom wall and sit there to let yourself ease into the beating that keeps interrupting your thoughts. 

It feels like it takes forever, but when you check the clock, the pounding starts to wind down a little after more or less fifteen minutes. You don’t have the energy to get up from the warmth of the bathroom floor, so you continue to sit as you open your phone. 

You have three snaps, five messenger texts, two texts and eleven missed phone calls. The phonecalls belong to three people; three from Tom (your heart skips a beat at the thought that he thinks of you), six from Benedict, and surprisingly, two from Chris. 

The two texts are one message of having voicemails (three), and one message from Tom; I heard from Benedict. He’s worried, are you okay? - Tom. You ignore it, making a note to reply and listen to the voicemails after checking messenger and snap. 

It takes three seconds to regret checking snap. Two of the snaps are from people you have no idea who are, but who you probably added last night. The last one is a video of you from Y/BFF/N embarrassing yourself to the nth degree on the dance floor. You know they saved it, and you know there is no point in asking to delete it―no matter what, you know they won’t post it anywhere. 

In a state of shock, checking messenger becomes more automated that anything else. You read the messages; one with a similar name to one of the snap usernames that you ignore and delete the friend request seeing as the message itself is not one you want; one that’s from a groupchat with you, Y/BFF/N and another mutual friend that you don’t see that often as they live abroad, but whom you trust fully and therefore has replied to your drunk texts about wanting to fuck a certain person whose name shall not be mentioned; three texts from Chris asking what’s going on, if you’re okay and if there’s anything he can do to help. You only reply to Chris’s by asking why he wonders, saying yes and asking him if he knows anything about what happened last night―you do not admit to having no memory of the evening. 

Waiting for a reply you listen to the voicemails. All three are from Benedict; one he sounds mad in, one he sounds worried in, and one he threatens to call the police and tell them that you’re missing and that you might be in danger―it feels a little weird not knowing if that actually happened. 

You sigh, blowing your hair so it falls in your face. Well, well, gotta keep searching. 

In the living room, Y/BFF/N lies in the same position as before. You ignore them, instead focusing on the low rumble from your stomach. 

Hopefully, some food will help clear the mystery. 

The food itself doesn’t help. However, the replies from Chris does. 

Chris: asking because you seemed very drunk and i wanted to know you’re okay, good that you are, and no, i don’t know since you never really gave me anything to go on

You: okay, well, there are no other messages between us, anything I did to alert you??

Chris: uhh, no, actually it was Tom that called me

You: Tom?? Hiddleston?? The dude who I teach with?? 

Chris: yeah… i was surprised too, maybe talk to him?

You: yeah, im gonna 

Of course, that’s what you tell Chris. You know, with every ounce of your body, that you will not pick up the phone and either text or call him because you know that that would be the death of you. 

You will wait, as long as you can, to ask Tom why he called Chris. The thought of it alone just has that feeling of wrongness expand. You shake it off, put away your phone and return your attention to your food. 

 --

Going into work on Monday is not on your list of fun activities, but it is something you have to do. You suppose it would have been on your list of fun if not for the looming conversation you need to have with a certain professor. 

It takes little time after your first class to meet him. Usually, your schedules don’t coincide but you guess the universe isn’t on your side today. 

“Hi.” Tom purses his lips and puts his hands in his pockets. 

You nod. “Hi.”

“How was your weekend?” he asks. 

“It was good,” you say and nod. “You know what, I can’t really talk right now. Catch you later?” You shoot him a pained smile and hurry away before Tom can answer. There is no way you’ve ever been in a more awkward situation (and the worst part is that you don’t even know what it is that made it awkward―what the fuck did you say?!). 

You try not to think too hard about it as you make your way back to your office. With two hours of office time, you can get back to focusing on your research project and get your mind off Saturday night and your possibly very embarrassing utterance to Tom. 

God, what the fuck did you say?

It takes a solid five minutes for your mind to rush back to what’s been circling around the last twenty-four hours. 

“Okay, you know what?” you say out loud to the silence of your office. It does not reply back. However, in the need to say it out loud, you act as if it did. “I have to just ask. I’m gonna go to wherever he currently is and I’m gonna ask what I said and I’m gonna cut right to the chase and it’s gonna be alright. It’s gonna be okay. It’s probably not as bad as I think it is.” 

However, you don’t get up. It’s like you’re glued to your chair and no matter how much the nerves in your brain tells your legs to get up, they don’t move. 

For two hours, you just sit there. Almost so you’re late to class even. 

 --

“We’re doing a what?” 

Both you and Tom frown at Dean McHallan who, though with a slight roll of his eyes, nods. “You’re going to a conference in Scotland. I know it’s sudden and it seems weird, but they specifically asked for you two to speak.”

You raise a brow. “They asked for us to speak about what exactly? Do I have to prepare some kind of presentation or something now because, honestly, I’m not ready for that.” 

“They asked for you both to speak on team-teaching creative writing. They wanted input from your students as well so during the week now, ask them some questions that you can quote them on. And they wanted you, Y/N, to speak on your research project as they find it interesting and they weirdly enough hadn’t thought about it before. They would love to hear how you’re going about it.” 

Your mind races as you nod along to his words. What are you supposed to do? Say no, nope, you can’t do that. You literally have no choice because he’s already said you’re going and McHallan makes the final decisions and he also knows neither of you really have anything that important going on currently. 

“Okay, I guess we’re going to Scotland next week.” You’ve always wanted to go so maybe it’s an opportunity you should take anyway. 

“It’s settled then. Tom?”

The literature professor nods. “I can’t argue with your reasoning so I guess we’re going. I have some inquiries. Accomodations? Travel? Food? And when?”

McHallan hands each of you a piece of paper. “You will be in the same hotel, though different rooms. I think they’ll be just across from each other or something. You’ll fly there on wednesday morning, together, and have all wednesday evening to settle in and make the last preparations and so on. Food will be accounted for unless you eat above budget. There are breakfast and dinner included at the hotel, and lunch is served with the conference. If you eat anything outside of that it will be out of your own pocket. The schedule for the conference is on the back of that paper and the information you need about your flights just under there.”

You nod, going over the paper as McHallan talks and making different mental notes. Some of those make no sense, and one of them is ‘get trapped somewhere so you have to ask Tom what you did on Saturday’, though you’re afraid that one might be the hardest one to see through with.

[rogue-barnes-16]

WHEN YOU COME BACK (part II/II)

Summary: After months of being friends with benefits, the dangerous agreement backfires and Bucky’s feelings for Y/n are exposed. Instead of talking it out, they make the situation worse, and it might get more difficult after a dangerous mission.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Genre: angst w/ a pleasant ending

Tags:

Permanent taglist: @notexactlythatgirl @thisismysecrethappyplace @sofreakinmanyfandoms @pizzarollpatrol @bubblycypress87 @1a-girl-has-no-name1 @loislp @lovenaturefirst @dyanna-corona @2ptonpt @goodnightmode @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @mannls @cutie1365 @catch22inareddress @mybooradley @sebastianisasnack @butifulsoul125 @unlikelygalaxygiver

Warnings: language, injuries

A/N: here it is my dudes. It was, for some reason I can't understand, heavily inspired by When the party's over by Billie Eilish, Haunted by Melanie Martinez, and What about us by P!nk. Just a little curiosity for y'all, hope you enjoy <3.

Part I

Rogue-barnes-16 masterlist

That night that we accidentally found each other in a shitty bar on our way out of Stark's house after Tony and Natasha's funeral, we shouldn't have lost control.

We wouldn't be in this situation, maybe I would haven't fallen that hard for him, and maybe he wouldn't think he loves me now.

We probably would be friends, close friends, or at least regular people who don't have to hide that they're sleeping with each other.

"Hey there, stranger." his voice was broken. He stumbled to the booth I was occupying, and I realized he was somehow as drunk as me. "rough week?"

"rough five years." I corrected him, sniffing. "It doesn't seem to get better." I felt the lump in my throat mixed with my hoarse voice as I chucked another shot of tequila. When I looked up at him, I noticed how red her eyes were. "what's wrong?"

"A lot." he replied, easing his position to rest against the backrest of the booth. "Never got to tell Natalia I remember." he shrugged. "Also wanted to... Apologize to Stark. Didn't get the chance to." he shut his eyes.

"Somethin' else." I stated more than questioned. "it's somethin' else."

He hesitated before looking at me with glassy eyes "can I tell you a secret?" I nodded lazily, muttering an 'always'. "Steve's leaving."

"What?" I frowned, sitting upright. "Where?"

He shook his head no with a sad smile in his face, a sad smile that held little happiness and too much sorrow. "When, not where."

"Director Carter..." I spoke in low voice, and Bucky nodded at me. I looked down, not knowing what to say. "at least he's got his happy ending."

"Yeah." tears streamed down his face as he drank from what I recognized as Thor's flask. "I'm happy for him." I tilted my head in disbelief and he denied slowly. "I really am."

"It's just the two of us now, Bucky." I whispered leaning against the wall to face him. "you should be selfish once in a while" I advised, scooting closer to him. "say what you think, no matter who gets hurt." our thighs were brushing as I leaned on him a little too close to whisper something in his ear. "you don't owe anything to this fucked up world."

His head spun and our eyes met. "I don't." he affirmed, letting his hand drop to my thigh as mines traveled to his hair. "you don't either." he bit his lip and I sighed. "You don't have to be strong all the time."

"what...?" I questioned quietly, too focused on his lips to even process what he was saying.

"Allow yourself to cry for 'em doll." his mutter made me let out a strained, shaky breath, remembering why I had hidden in a bar in order to numb my pain, remembering why I hadn't stayed with the rest in Pepper's house. "It's just the two of us now, Y/n..."

I looked up at him through glassy, blurred eyes just to see his in the same state. His eyes flickered to my lips, just like mines had been staring St him that whole time, and something took over the both of us.

It was probably the sadness, at least partially, and the thinking that losing more wasn't possible anymore, what made us close the gap in a sloppy, needy kiss, which would be the first of many, that night and the followings.

I had desperately wanted to apologize to Bucky for two days, in hopes of getting our friendship back.

I figured he didn't inform me he was back because he didn't want to see me, and that mere thought made my heart shrink until it physically hurt.

I was getting dressed when my phone buzzed. "Sam?" I called him, utterly confused. Sam rarely phoned me, he would just show up at my door. "what's wrong?"

"The mission went wrong. So fucking wrong." I couldn't ask about Bucky before he resumed his narration. "Listen to me carefully, 'cause he made me promise I wouldn't tell you shit."

"what- why?" I inquired, sitting down in my couch.

"Those fuckers were shooting me, there was no way I could dodge all of 'em, and that dumbass jumped in fucking front of me." his voice was strained due to the anger and the worry, and I felt my heart pounding against my chest. "he received two bullets. He's in the Avengers' private hospital. Pepper got us in."

"he what..." I was already grabbing my things to rush there, but he spoke again.

"you can't come, he'll kill me if he sees you here." Sam pointed out.

"why the fuck are you telling me then, Wilson?" it was desperate, and it was shaky, but I managed to get that question put of me without breaking.

"What the hell? 'Cause you're good for him, and I don't want you to think he dumped whatever you guys have." I stood there, my mouth in agape at his words. "Sharon's telling me she'll take care of the paperwork so we can go home in a couple of days."

"okay..."

"Go see him at his apartment on... Monday." he advised me. "at 9 pm, he won't have an excuse to avoid you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Despite the fact that he knew I would definitely not forget about the day and the time he had told me, on Sunday Sam called to remind me it, and also to inform me that he had just left Bucky’s apartment. He was now there resting, and would be until tomorrow morning.

On Monday, at 9 pm I was carefully knocking on Bucky’s door, and he answered in no time.

"Sam, you better bring Chinese food you promised or-" he stood there, resting all his weight against the door and the door frame, taking in the fact that I was there. "Fuck..."

I had planned a whole speech, apologizing for what I had said in a thousand different ways, telling him how much I didn't want to lose him, and maybe, just maybe, confessing my feelings about him.

But everything was gone the moment I saw his bruises, his bandaged body under the tee, peeking out of the collar, the way he barely could stand upright.

Everything was gone. "what the fuck..."

"he told you, didn't he?" I couldn't even look at him in the eye, but I just knew he didn't either, just by how hurt and tired his voice sounded. "that's why you're here."

"I—"

"I'm fine Y/n..." he assured me, bitterness fading from his voice the second he started to sympathize with how I must be feeling, the second he imagined the situation reverted. The way guilt and fear most likely would have been killing him slowly. "I just need a few days to heal... You don't need to—"

He gasped when I my arms embraced him almost desperately as I tried to convince myself that I wouldn't lose him. "I swear on my fuckin' life, Barnes—" I choked on my words and he wrapped his arms around me not without closing the door to rest his back against it. "don't do this to me alright?" he took a deep breath with his nose buried on my crown as his thumbs caressed both my back and my shoulder. "don't-- I can't lose you... Not you-- please not you."

I didn't realize I was sobbing until I didn't feel my tears on his shirt. "You won't" ha assured me, trying to keep his voice uniform for me not to notice that he was crying too. "I'll heal soon, don't worry." his breath was sharp as he squeezed my body against him, despite the pain that he most probably was feeling. "I got you."

I pulled away when my hands accidentally sneak under his shirt and felt the bandages. "you gotta lay down."

"yeah, you're probably right."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"If you're here to apologize 'cause you feel guilty or bad... Don't." he requested, looking up at me from my lap. "you really don't need to." his voice slowly started to drop when I ran my hands through his hair. "It was my fault... I shouldn't have... Said..."

"I love you."

"yeah."

"No, Bucky." I stopped my motions and looked at him dead in the eye. "I love you. I have done for a long time." he was quiet. "When you said... I really didn't wanna believe it... I don't know I just—" I sighed, shutting my eyes and leaning against the backrest. "I don't-- I don't wanna lose more people that I love and if I didn't say it out loud, I felt-" I took a deep breath, swallowing the lump forming in my throat. "I felt like I wouldn't lose--"

I didn't even feel when he had propped himself up to reach me, I only felt his velvety soft lips against mine in the most loving, sweet kiss I had ever had.

"I get it, but we... We gotta be brave." he stated, laying down again with a wince, gazing into my now open eyes. "we don't have regular lives... And I didn't wanna say it out loud either but... I- I needed you to know." I nodded, letting my fingers ran through his short hair once more. "I don't wanna lose you, but let's be honest, that possibility exist, and..." his voice started to drop again, slowly being lulled by my touch. "I'd rather having you know how much... How much you mean to me... Than regretting not... Tellin' ya all my life..."

"You're right." I replied, leaning over to peek his lips, and then his forehead. "I'm sorry for the way I reacted... I really, really am." my thumb rubbed lazily his forehead as my eyes observed him with the love I finally was able to disclose.

"Y/n." I hummed. "lay down with me, please." he requested, lifting for my to move my legs. "I wanna hug you again." I complied without hesitation, being careful not to hurt him. "I love you." He whispered in my ear, pulling me up to rest half of my body over him.

"I love you too."

[buckyscrystalqueen]

Adventure: Part 5

Pairings: John Winchester x Reader (SOA/SPN crossover)

Warnings: Swearing, fluff, angst.

Word Count: 3,128

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It took all night to get Emma to calm down and finally go to bed. She screamed her poor, little heart out through her bath, over the music you played on your phone, and even after you wrapped her in John’s shirt. The only time she didn’t scream is when she ate around ten-thirty pm and four am and you thanked the lord when she cried herself to sleep at five-fifteen. Which lasted all of an hour when someone began pounding on the front door.

“I got it, lass.” Chibs said sleepily as he shuffled past the guest bedroom with his gun hanging by his side. You nodded as you rolled out of bed and went over to the pack and play.

“Come on, Em. Give mommy and grand pop a break, little girl.”

“Hey… what’s all the crying for?” John asked softly as he dipped into the room. You looked over your shoulder at him and burst into grateful tears as Chibs went back to his room and shut the door a little sharply to finally get some sleep.

“Thank God.” You said as you passed off Emma. “I’m fine just make her stop, please.” He smiled and nodded as he cradled his little girl to his chest.

“Hi princess. Hey.” He cooed as he walked back over and closed the door. “It’s OK, Emma. Daddy’s here. Yea, daddy’s here.” As if he was a magic pill, Emma almost instantly quieted down and fell asleep on his chest. He chuckled as he sat down on the bed beside you.

“You stink.” You said as you curled up in a ball against his side.

“Spent the night in the woods, baby girl. I should stink.” You nodded your head and closed your eyes as he ran his fingers through your hair. “Sleep, sweetheart. I got her.”

——

You woke up a couple hours later to a loud, squealed laugh from the bathroom across the hall from your bedroom. A smile pulled at the corner of your lips as you rolled off the bed, stretched for a moment, and followed the sound to the bathroom. Chibs’ door was open so you figured he had left as you pushed open the bathroom door.

“…yea, then your brother shot him right in the head with the flair gun.” John said in a sing song voice as he brushed his fingers through Emma’s hair to wash the honey apple baby wash out of her brown curls. “Yea, he did.”

“Are you traumatizing our child already?” You asked as you leaned on the door frame to watch with a smile.

“I’m educating our child.” He said with a smile as he got some water in his hand and rinsed off his daughter. “Yes, I am.” He glanced over at you and blew you a kiss as he poured more water down the back of Emma’s head. “Chibs left. Said to stick around, he’d come back to say bye in a couple hours. And she ate breakfast.”

“Thank you, baby.” He nodded and smiled back down at Emma.

“I missed you both so much.” He said as he kissed her forehead.

“Oh, we most definitely missed you too. Want me to take her so you can finish up?” He nodded and you pushed off the wall to grab your daughter. “Come here baby.” You said as you grabbed her towel off the closed toilet seat and tossed it open over your shoulder. John opened the door and handed you Emma, who nearly instantly started to cry.

“Aw, it’s OK, princess. Daddy’s right here.” He chuckled as you wrapped her in her towel.

“You spoil her to much, John.” You said with a shake of your head.

“She’ll be back to normal in a day or two. I promise.”

“Hey, now. All you’ve done is cry, baby girl. What’s all that about, huh?” You asked as you carried her into your room while toweling her off. “What do we wanna wear today?” You asked yourself as you put Emma in a diaper while she was distracted by the fan above your head. You grabbed your duffle and set it on the bed with a hum as you put your knee on the bed beside your daughter so she didn’t roll. You smiled as you grabbed a pink onesie you found in a thrift store that read ‘I’m cute, mom’s hot, dad’s screwed’ and put her in that. You were just putting a pair of cute, ruffled, black bloomers when John came in.

“So did you have fun here?” John asked as he came in to get dressed.

“Well I don’t know if you can call it fun.” You said as you picked up Emma and put her in the new bouncer. “Interesting would be a more appropriate word I think. Got this.” He looked over at you as you grabbed the manilla envelope out of your bag and tossed it on the bed.

“Holy shit.” He said as he grabbed a stack of cash and ran his thumb over the edge. “There’s gotta be like…”

“Almost two hundred thousand dollars? Yea, Jax sold our house. Saved over half of it for me. I spent some of it on stuff we needed for her and then opened up a bank account in Emma’s name with fifty grand in it for college and shit. Hope that’s OK.”

“No that’s fine, sweetheart. That’s good thinking.” He put the money back in the envelope and handed it back to you. “It’s your money, baby girl…”

“Our money.” You said as you shoved the envelope back in your duffle. “And Jax is selling my old car for me, too. So we’ll have that. Maybe we can consider adding a star or two to our hotel every couple months?”

“Or we can get a house.” You looked up at him as you buttoned your shorts and shook your head.

“I don’t want one, John. I don’t want to settle down anywhere. I like being…”

“And you don’t know what you’re really signing up for with a baby on the road long term in the hunters life, (Y/N). You’re gunna either be leaving her behind, alone, while we go and hunt or you’re going to be left behind in a hotel room with her while I go hunting…”

“So being in a house is so much better? Being on the road you at least come home to us every night. We settle down and you come home, what, maybe once a week? Once a month, if I’m lucky? Fuck, I coulda stayed married if I wanted that…”

“OK, OK.” He said as he came over and gave you a hug to interrupt your slightly panicked rant. “No house. We don’t need a house.” You nodded against his bare chest as you wrapped your arms around his waist with a sigh.

“Sorry, it’s just… Charming makes me crazy.”

“You’re always crazy, baby girl.” He chuckled. He rubbed your back and kissed the top of your head before pulling away. “Alright, let’s get the truck packed up so we can get out of here when Chibs comes back. We’ll go find a three star hotel to stay at for a couple days. Maybe scar our daughter a little more by making a second?”

“Not happening, John. One baby is more than enough. You’re too old to chase after two.”

“Hey! I’m not that fucking old!” He laughed as he whacked your leg with his towel.

“Yes you are baby. But it’s OK. I love you all the same.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hey (Y/N), is this bag going in the trash?” John called out from the living room as you folded the last load of clothes in the laundry room.

“Is it by the black couch or the brown couch?” You called back as you put a pair of your panties on your pile.

“Black.”

“No, that’s getting donated.” You yelled as you snagged the last sock from the dryer and tossed it on John’s pile. “Wait, let me see to make sure.” You said as you grabbed both of your and Emma’s pile of clean clothes and headed out of the little laundry room off the kitchen into the living room. You looked at the bag of clothes from your car; all stuff that you hadn’t worn since you were a teenager and nodded. “Yea, that’s donation. This one is all trash. And make sure you don’t mix them because some of them are blood stained and we don’t need to explain why.”

“Got it.” He said as he set the donation bag down and grabbed the trash one to take it out back. You continued on to your bedroom, where you had every article of clothing your family owned neatly stacked on the bed to be repacked with some semblance of order in your duffles, when someone knocked on the front door. You dropped the clothes in your arms quickly and ran to the door before who ever was at Chibs’ house could ring the door bell and wake up Emma. You were absolutely not expecting the female officer on the other side of the door.

“Oh! I’m sorry. I’m looking for Filip Telford?” You nodded your head as you put your foot behind the door and closed it a little bit.

“Right house but he’s not here. And you are…?” She sized you up and glanced over your head into the house.

“Lieutenant Jarry. San Joaquin county sheriffs… do you mind if I come in and wait?”

“Do you have a warrant?” You asked without missing a beat, knowing full and well that if you let a cop into a Sons club members house without one you’d be dead in a minute. Her eyes met yours and there was a slight familiarity to them.

“Just a friendly chat. Who are you?”

“None of your Goddamn business that’s who.” She cocked her eyebrows at you as you stood your ground in the sliver of the door way.

“Technically, you’re breaking and enter…”

“Oh, please.” You said with a sarcastic scoff. “I don’t know who you are, lady but I have more right to be here than you do. Not that it’s any of your fucking business but I’m his daughter…”

“Kerrianne?” Your head reeled as you tried to figure out who this woman was as Chibs finally came home.

“Dude, who are you?” You barked over the rumble of the motorcycle. Chibs killed his engine and got of his bike with a shake of his head.

“Althea… no’ a good time.” He said as he headed up the walkway toward you. Your face paled and your stomach rolled as you looked at the woman you only knew by name.

“Althea Jarry of Fresno?” You asked as your head began to spin. She looked over at you a little terrified and nodded her head slowly.

“How did you…?” She asked as you held onto the door for balance.

“You left your two day old daughter at a fire station when you were seventeen with a note that said you were sorry you couldn’t be a parent yet. I’m (Y/N) and you can go fuck yourself.” Without another word to her, you turned on your heel and slammed the door in her face, which woke up Emma again.

“(Y/N)…?” You shook your head at John and continued down the hall to your crying daughter. 

“Get me out of this fucking state.” You whispered as you shook your head. You heard the front door slam once more behind you as you started packing your bags quickly.

“Luv… I didn’ know.” Chibs said as he stuck his head in your door way as John picked up Emma and started to sooth her.

“No one did.” You said as you as you frantically shoved clothes into both bags without thinking. “Not a single soul knew I knew her name. No one knew she left me a letter. No one knew because she didn’t fucking matter in my life. She didn’t want me and I sure as fuck don’t want her. And I don’t want you telling her anything about me. Nothing at all. Nor about Emma. She gave up that chance to know her daughter…”

“(Y/N)…” John said carefully but you shook your head.

“No, fuck her. I…”

“Baby girl!” You looked over at him with your eyebrows raised and your wild eyes searched his. “She wants you. I can’t feed her.” You took a deep breath and looked at your fussy baby girl who was chewing on John’s finger and started to hyperventilate. Tears started pouring down your cheeks as your emotions overwhelmed you.

“Come ‘ere, luv. ’s’a’right.” Chibs said as he grabbed your arm before your knees gave out. He helped you over the pile of clothes and onto your bed. He told John he’d come back in a bit with some water before excusing himself. John climbed up on the bed next to you and gently laid Emma in your arms.

“Fuck her.” He said simply as he unsnapped your nursing tank top while you cradled Emma to your chest. “She’s nothing to us.” You nodded your head slowly and leaned into his side as you helped your world latch on for her lunch. Once you were sure she was eating, you turned into John’s shoulder and simply sobbed.

——

“She’s pulling me over.” John growled as he looked at your birth mother in his rear view mirror.

“I see it.” You said as you looked away from the side view mirror and turned in your chair. You sighed when she hit the siren once and shook your head. “Just pull over.” He nodded his head and pulled the truck over to the side of the road as you leaned into the back seat to pull up the sun shade you had to block your daughter from her view.

“She’s coming around to you.” He warned. You looked up at him through your lashes as you put a rattle Chibs had picked up for your daughter in her car seat beside her.

“Is this really happening?” You inquired as Althea stopped behind you and looked at your back through the tinted window. He nodded his head slowly as she reached up and rapped her knuckle on the glass. With a sigh, you rolled your eyes and sat back in your chair to roll down your window. “How can I help you, officer?” You asked with forced smile.

“Can I just talk to you?” She asked as she took a step closer to the truck.

“Let me ask you something.” John said as he put his arm over the back of the bench seat and turned toward the passenger side window. “Parent to… well, I guess I can’t really call you a fucking parent but we’ll just throw that term in loosely, how about that?” You smirked and quickly covered it with the back of your hand as you looked over at his straight, emotionless face. 

“I have three kids. Two are in their late twenties and one is under a year. My boys lost their mother when they were just babies, one of them no older than my youngest is now. I lost my house, I lost my job, I lost every single thing I had to my fucking name when my late wife passed away except my boys. We lived out of a Chevy Impala, traveling around the country as I looked for whatever fucking work I could find to keep them alive and healthy. Mind you, I was fresh out of the Marines when my oldest was born. Sure, I could have taken the easy way out and put them in the system. Dean was old enough that he’d only partially remember he had a family but Sam was just a baby. He’d remember nothing. They would have been just fine… or they could have ended up like the kid you dumped at a fire house.

They could have bounced around from group home to group home, foster family to foster family, realizing every single day that no one loved them. They could have had to fight for their lives every single moment of every single day to make it through to see the next sun rise. They could have had to live in their car just to get the hell out of the system in any way they could, gotten mixed up in a biker gang at sixteen years old, married off at eighteen, and treated like a piece of shit for the next ten years by the person that was supposed to love and cherish them for the rest of their life because that’s all they felt like they fucking deserved!” He roared before he took a deep breath to control his anger as you turned to give Emma her pacifier. 

“Now you tell me.” He continued as he glared at Althea through the cab around you. “Do you really think you have the fucking right to talk to her? Because I know for a fucking fact if I had dropped my boys off at a fire house, or if I had walked away from (Y/N) and the child we have, I would never, EVER expect to talk to them ever again, even if they were standing right in front of me. And the fact that you think that just because you have a badge, you have the fucking right to talk to her is fucking sickening. Now, unless you were planning on writing me a ticket for something I know I didn’t fucking do, I suggest you get your ass back in your fucking car, turn it around, and drive back to whatever hole you came out of. And you need to stay the fuck away from the woman that you wanted nothing to do with until it was fucking convenient for you.” He dropped his arm and put his truck into drive as Althea nodded and took a step back from the truck.

“You’re such a papa bear.” You said to him as he pulled back on the street while you put the window back up. “So cute.”

“Shut up.” He huffed as you reached over for his hand. He laced his fingers with yours as he pulled your hand over and kissed your fingers. “Love you, baby girl.”

“I love you, too.” You said as you squeezed his hand. “Alright, where we going next? After that shit show weekend, we need to relax.”

“Honestly, I don’t even care.” He said with a glance over at you as he pulled onto the interstate headed out of California. “As long as I have my girls, I’m good.”

[mtvswatches]

Jane the Virgin 1x03 Chapter Three

Spoilers disclaimer (please read before sending messages or writing comments.)

Stray thoughts 

1) The style of the “previously on” is very similar to the ones done in actual telenovelas, minus the narration. And on that note, I was wondering if the narrator will always be reliable or whether he will trick the viewers at some point? So far, he’s been reliable, but I guess there’s not much to base that argument on, you know?

2) Jane’s wishes, though…

#priorities

3) I really love how both her mom and her grandma have a great influence on her without being overbearing. She listens to both of them, and her decisions seem to fall somewhere in the middle.

4) I’m guessing Gina Rodriguez uttering these words…

…is part of a lot of people’s fantasies, right?

Also, I’m kind of surprised it took her so long to think of this “loophole”. Like, I thought they would bring it up in episode 1, but okay.

5) Could Petra have killed Zaz, though? The answer can’t be so straightforward, but we don’t have any clues yet… She doesn’t seem to be heartbroken, though.

6) The narrator keeps asking us to “trust” him, and I’m here like, hmmmm, maaaaaaybe?

7) Will Sin Rostro be someone we already know? Or someone that we haven’t met yet but who’s related to some of the main characters?

8) How will getting private messages from Petra – who is a suspect of murder – make Michael – the detective investigating the case – look? Someone is bound to find out.

9) Her fucking heartbeat started racing when she touched his arm…

10) Why was Rose so fascinated with Jane, though? And Luisa is a naughty girl, isn’t she?

11) How is Michael going to explain this one?

12) “But instead he lied.” Of course he did. Can’t say I’m surprised.

13) “I'm dismissing you 'cause you're not making any sense. You're, like, hormonal or something.” And you know what, Michael?

But in all seriousness, this is some serious gaslighting right here, isn’t it?

14) I mentioned this in my previous recap, but I really enjoy how honest Rafel and Jane are with each other and how much they value each other’s opinions. I’m keeping my fingers crossed super hard that this doesn’t change once they get together (I’m guessing they will because duh.)

JANE: I'm judgey. You should know that about me. You may end up having a really judgey kid.

RAFAEL: Okay, so what does "judgey" sound like? So that I can be prepared.

JANE: You told me that you don't want to be anything like your dad, which is easy enough to say. But actions are what count. So, what are you doing about it?

RAFAEL: I hope the baby's judgey.

And let’s see what he does about it, right?

15) I really love that Alba is traditional but not old-fashioned or too set on her ways. Like, she seems to be super cool with her daughter sleeping with her old flame in her own house (she even covered up for them in front of Jane.) And she’s so excited when Xiomara gets the presents from Rogelio? (This guy is truly clueless, isn’t he?) I like you, Alba.

16) Seriously, Rogelio.

17) Yeah, completely logical suggestion. Sound advice, sound advice.

18) Michael is a complete idiot, okay? Who in their right mind would tamper with his own investigation’s evidence just to avoid her girlfriend from keeping a baby?

19) Oh, Rogelio, Rogelio…

He’s so clueless, but I think he might be one of my favorite characters so far.

20) I really loved that when faced with a similar situation to the one Michael faced – the possibility of telling a lie that would inevitably snowball – Jane chose to come clean. That’s kind of refreshing.

21) I love how all of Alba’s resolve melts down the second she sees Rogelio in his glorious El President outfit. He is a charmer, though. And Alba was swayed so easily, I loved it.

22) So Petra got Jane and Michael the suite… is this a favor she intends to cash back?

23) Am I… am I watching Crazy Ex Girlfriend now?!

24) I like how Xiomara and Alba play the devil and angel on Jane’s shoulders, but they’re both good people with good intentions, it’s just that they have very different outlooks on life and very different parenting styles.

25) Well, you’d have to be dead for her heart not to pound like crazy after dancing like this with this hottie…

I don’t ship it yet, though. I wonder if I will because I don’t usually ship the pairings that the shows try to shove down your throat from episode one, and Rafael and Jane are clearly that. I tend to prefer the underdog romantic interest, the unexpected I-never-saw-that-coming-but-the-chemistry-was-impossible-to-ignore one. So we’ll see how it goes with this show.

26) So, Rose enjoys the sordid tryst with her step-daughter, but it’s only that. I can’t see Luisa being okay with this. And how long can you call what they have “temporary”? It seems this has been going on for a long time…

27) Saved by the bell, literally.

28) Alba’s words are meant to be accepting and supportive, but they have a different effect on Jane, they forced her to face her feelings, the fact that she’s not so sure Michael is the man she wants to marry…

Mi amor, quería decirte algo. Aún cuando cometas este pecado mortal, yo te sigo queriendo. Te guardaste para el hombre con el que te vas a casar, el hombre del que estás segura. Y me da gusto que no me hayas mentido, te quiero mucho.

29) Her heart, though…

30) Oh Petra, you’re fucked…

PETRA: Hey, did you ever get in touch with Aaron?

RAFAEL: Aaron?

PETRA: Zaz's brother. You mentioned him this morning.

NARRATOR: He had not got in touch with Aaron. In fact, Rafael's search for Zaz's brother had been stymied by one simple fact. Until this moment, he never knew his name.

31) Oh, Jane, you lied to Michael… tsk, tsk…

32) And it backfired…

MICHAEL: We'll wait, then. But what are we waiting for? I-I love you. You're the person I want to be with. So there's no reason why we can't move the wedding up, right?

33) Of course Petra is manipulating Michael, in what world did white loaf bread could possibly believe he’d be able to call the shots in this scenario? I gotta wonder, though, could the murderer been her mum? I mean, I can totally picture her pulling a Spike - pretending she’s in a wheelchair so that she can get away with stuff. Hmmm.

34)

The narrator seems surprised, but even before that, I had the feeling that “XO” doesn’t stand for Xiomara, maybe just your regular XOXO? From what I’ve seen of Rogelio so far, I can totally believe him deciding to send the pre-made gift basket thinking that she would totally love it, without giving it a second thought. Dude is totally self-absorbed, so I can’t picture him going out of his way to get her a personalized, meaningful present like the bracelet. That ought to have been a mistake of some kind.

Thing is, whether I’m right or wrong, this definitely makes the narrator less than omniscient. He was thrown off by the bracelet. So maybe it’s not so that he is unreliable but that he doesn’t see the whole picture... 

Yes, I know, I’m way too obsessed with the role of the narrator, I just find it fascinating okay?

35) Does your wish come true if the firefly dies on your hands?

36) I enjoyed this episode, I really like where the stories are going, but I was fully expecting another huge plot twist. Onto the next one!

37) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!

38) This recap is dedicated to @capitalnineteen , who requested first on this post! Thank you for showing your support!

[ontherockswithsalt]

A Made Man

/1/ /2/ /3/ /4/ /5/ /6/ /7/ /8/ /9/ /10/ /11/ /12/ /13/

A/N: Could your Monday use some Joble smut? I hope so. Let’s see how Noble likes being handcuffed. Explicit sex warning for this chapter. ;)

Chapter 14.

“Alright fine, this hurts more than I thought it would.” Noble groans his complaint from underneath me where he sits on the edge of the bed, naked aside from the pair of handcuffs on his wrists.

I breathe out a throaty laugh as I edge closer to him, my knees straddling his lap. “Uh-huh. I told you.”

Helplessly, he tips his head back and peers up at me as he manages a pathetic whimper.

I’m amused as I brush a kiss across his lips. With a tease of my tongue, I ease back. “I thought you said you could take it.”

“Yeah but I can't touch you.”

“I know.” I dip down and mumble the words into the side of his neck. “That's not fair.”

“Oh no no,” he rattles with a laugh as I make my way down. “You'll kill me.”

“No I won't,” I tell him as I step back off the bed but I stay close to him and sink lower to my knees. I glance up at him. “I'll be nice.”

Noble merely swallows down another rumbling grunt and shifts in front of me.

As I grasp his thick cock, stiff in front of me, my hand skates the length of it. “You don't believe me?”

All he can do is laugh again as he tilts closer. “You're asking for it.”

“That's big talk from someone who can't use his hands right now.” Leaning in, I take him in my mouth with a teasing stroke of my tongue.

He exhales hard at the sensation. “Have you done this before? Why do I feel like you have?”

“No.” I smile with a shake of my head before I taste him once again, letting a soft moan escape when my lips wrap around the smooth head of his cock. With a light flick of my tongue, I stroke the ridge there and then sink my mouth farther before I pull back to tell him, “I've only ever been on the receiving end when it comes to being handcuffed in bed.”

“What?” He coughs, then tips his head back when he can't restrain a deep groan.

I close my fist around him and follow the slick path of my mouth.

“You're such a slut, oh my god,” he complains in a weary sigh.

Easing away, I have to laugh at the accusation and I explain, “Things happen in the police academy.”

“Please tell me that story sometime so that I can make you forget whoever it was.”

“Mm--” I breathe a low moan as I rise up on my knees. “I already have,” I confess before I lean in and take him deeper. I use my free hand to pull him closer at his hip, digging fingers there. My touch drags down his thigh, a heavy palm stroking the muscular curve there.

“Ahh--” He manages a gravelly sigh and I feel him straighten in front of me. “Get up. I can't--”

I drag my tongue as my head pulls back and I blink up at him, caught off guard when I'd just started to let go of the tease. “What? You want them off?”

“Yeah.”

With a soft chuckle I get to my feet. “It's not fun, is it?”

“Not when I want you this bad.”

Stepping over to my bag on the floor, I find the keys and quickly return to him. “Well you did win,” I remind him. “So whatever you want.”

“I want you on the bed.”

My eyebrow flicks with an excited jump as I kneel beside him and fit the key in the lock of the cuffs. I give it an expert twitch of my wrist before I slip them off and drop them on the floor.

The release prompts his groan of relief and immediately, he takes over with fingers in my hair. He tugs me down to straddle his lap as his mouth crushes mine.

My body responds in an instant at the feeling of his hands on me. I tilt into him, my hard-on pulsing with need and it makes this ache swirl in my core, I want him so bad.

Easily we shift and untangle and without anymore words needed, I give into his lead. I know from the urgency of his breath, from the strength of his grip, how he wants me.  

He follows in behind when he directs me across the bed, face-down. The weight of him, his hips at mine, feels so fucking good when he moves against me, and the rigid column of his dick teases between my cheeks.

He rides me there in a slow grinding rhythm, his forehead on the back of my shoulder. It's enough for me to rumble a needy groan from the friction between him and the bed beneath me.

“Mm, don't move,” he tells me before he shifts away for a moment.

I stay there, deep breaths fill my back and I hitch one knee up on the covers, tilting back on my hip when he returns behind me. Impatiently, I reach up for him, hooking a hand around the back of his neck to bring him closer just as he starts to press a slick middle finger inside me.

Muffling a restrained sigh, my eyes fall closed at the sensation. I rock back against him as he teases me there, a circling pulse of his fingertip.

We had taken our time earlier in the day, before we slept away a lazy afternoon, with kisses so long they stung my lips. Then, we held back with a careful give-and-take that was already so damn intense, it didn't take much to give in to our eager release.

But now neither one of us is interested in taking any time and I'm ready for him in this greedy, insatiable way. Once he eases his length in, I'm unwound enough to take it all. The groan that thunders from me is just outdone by his own when he fills me this good.

He exhales into the side of my neck, grips me at my side, and with a smooth stroke, thrusts so goddamn perfect that the heat of mind-numbing euphoria throbs everywhere in my pulse. It's a languid pace but it's hot as hell the way he never backs away from me, never pulling out, just buries himself deeper.

We're both shameless with loud, low growls that pound in our chests as we grasp for one another. Reaching up, I dig my hand in his hair and he lets go of moan that I feel on my skin. There he mumbles against my shoulder, breathy encouragement about the way I feel, the way I take his cock.

When I tug his hair once more, he straightens up and pushes his weight harder against me. His hand coasts the bent leg of mine that's hitched up on the bed and he urges me over even more. He shoves up my bent knee and I'm his completely, gripping the sheets there in my hand, I think they pull off the the corner of the mattress.

My chest heaving with every harsh panting breath, I bury my face, murmuring for him to fuck me and the command just drags out of me in a rattled moan.

Fuck he's so in control and so possessive of me and the way I'm thrust into the bed with Noble inside me prompts a dizzy climax I can't hold back.  

For a moment, the noises refuse to leave my throat when I come. I just dig my forehead into the mattress, breath bursting my lungs until I just see sparking dots of white in the blackness of my mind.

There’s this distant awareness that he finishes with me, our heavy exhales mingling and eventually, we slowly shift apart from one another.

He leaves the press of a kiss between my shoulder blades and I catch myself humming in content appreciation before I start to turn over.

“Damn,” I breathe. It's almost all I can manage along with a quiet laugh.

His weight falls heavy onto his back beside me, deep inhales filling his chest. “You're the hottest damn piece of ass, I swear dude.”

A spent chuckle thuds in my chest and I arch my neck back for heart-calming breath. “Thanks, dude,” I tease.

“I mean it,” he grins, amused. “There’s no way you went to Harvard when you’re that good in bed.”

“Those two things are mutually exclusive?”

“I guess they’re not,” he muses. “But fuck, is there anything you’re bad at?”

I start to prop myself up and I glance at the bed. “Apparently I’m bad at holding off my orgasm when it comes to you. You made me come on the sheets and we have to sleep here, so--”

With a loud laugh, he tips his head to crack up at the ceiling.

“Shut up.” A smile pulls at my cheeks when I glance over at him. “What else am I supposed to do? You’ll see, just wait.”

“You’ve gotta call Nina and let her know what happened--”

Before he can even finish, I throw an elbow back at his chest and he turns over to fight me off. “Oh my god,” I let out a weary groan. “I’d rather take them to the laundromat myself.”

“I’ll be generous with the housekeeping tip.”

All I can do is muffle my amusement into the blanket before I manage to sit upright. “Jeez.”

“There’s a spare set in the closet.”

“Alright.” Running a hand over my hair, I meet his gaze for a beat and admire him where he lies across the bed on his back, one lazy arm propped behind his head. “I’m gonna jump in the shower in the other room.”

He nods. “After mine, I’ll make a late dinner.”

“I would argue that you don’t have to do that but… I mean, I don’t put out for free.”

He reaches out with his free hand to gently shove my shoulder. “I’ll happily make you dinner forever if that’s all it takes.”

And while the assurance is simple, I still feel this warmth flare and turn a flip in my chest. With a heavy breath, I get myself out of bed letting him know, “I’ll call that bet, my friend” and I head down the hall.

[thecrotchhand]

health class >:(

-ug

-did somebody say rick of suicide

-”ooh, there’s a laser!” -student teacher

-good ways to manage stress- “punching a hole through the wall”

-”do you have a long-term goal?” “dying”

-”we should deport justin bieber back to canada”

-”if you say you're gonna do something, then do it" "i'm gonna kill myself ;))"

-"i'm busy singing Africa by Toto" *off-key singing continues*

-"when you lose weight, where does it go?" "it goes to weight heaven"

-the guy next to me started playing Africa quietly from his phone

-"i'm talking to bowl cut. just kidding chris. i love you." "...i'm getting a haircut."

-"you don't lift to get swole" -st

-"that sounds not good for you" "i'm gonna try it"

-"during pregnancy, the women in here are gonna need more folate, iron, and calcium" "no, i'm gonna need a coathanger"

-"liar liar pants for hire"

-"is eustress good stress or bad stress?" (long silence) "it's good stress! yay!" -st

-good ways to relax- "11 hours straight of anime"

-"everything's gonna be ok" lmao good joke

-"precipitation... wait i mean perspiration. it still counts, it's raining from your body."

-ways to manage depression- "kill yourself :D"

-help the teacher (flynn) has been yelling at us for the past five minutes

-uh oh she said damn it's gettin' wild

-she went back into her office after and all of a sudden we hear a quiet "oh, happy Wednesday"

-"is it possible to have an abortion 700 weeks late?"

-"what's the r-word we talked about?" "rawr XD"

-"what does autonomy mean?" "it's like grey's anatomy but for cars"

-alcoholism is a good sims trait

-guy: sneezes

guy's friend: "god bless... america"

-”what do you say to your sibling during an argument?” "you should've been aborted" “no”

- "your personality might be kind of boring" "like a potato!" "yeah"

-"what does down to earth mean?" "it means you're like the lorax, you speak for the trees"

-"he was happy?" "yeah! put him working with me and larson for ten years and... we fixed him!"

-the student teacher generally has a habit of sarcastic yaying and it entertains me

-"jason (chris) move your head" "just throw a rock at it, it'll move"

-someone was trying to come up with weird phobias and someone suggested genital herpes

-"sir you've been diagnose with hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia " "aahHH"

-"if someone comes up to you and says a mean word, you're gonna be upset" "hey sam" "what" "fuck"

-"i found a big circle"

-"*cough* flynn"

flynn, out of nowhere: "i heard that"

-"have you guys seen cabin in the woods?" "wait, the one with the cabin in the woods?"

-:(

-"let's say you don't have a gun" "pft, not in america"

-we were talking about miscarriage and cody goes "fetus... deletus"

-examples of anger- "when mcdonald's doesn't have ice cream"

-video from the 80's: "depression isn't talked about"

-a seal saved this guy's life and he just: 'ah yes it was all because of god' ¿¿¿???

-80's commercials are the weirdest shit

-yepperdoodles

-"...gonna get addicted to xanax"

-"you guys all did a really good job on your tests" "i got a C" "i got a D+" "yeah there wasn't a single person i was not happy with"

-"you say you see really good scores, but what i'm seeing is a D"

-examples of compromise- "i got a D+, but i feel i deserved an A, so let's meet in the middle with a C" "but what do i get out of it?" "if he passes the class, you don't have to see him anymore"

-"oh no my one feeling"

-"what are some ways to resolve conflict?" "killing yourself"

-"put away the candy this is health class"

-(talking about conflict) "...then the fire nation attacked"

-(softly) "yo what the heck dawg"

-"if they started a rumor-" "kill them"

-"when i was-" "a young boy"

-"you got two more weeks with the student teacher, then you get me back" *high pitched screaming*

-"they never broke out, and then one of them broke out"

-"wrestling uniforms are skimpy"

-(across the room) "hey man, can i touch your butt?" "i don't mind, dude"

-"let's say my wife is going to leave me and i'm... celebrating! oh wait"

-"they're fat and skinny, they're white, black, pink, purple, and orange-" "trump"

-"listen, idiotface"

-"do you think... the government is hiding the cure for cancer...?"

-i love government conspiracy theories during health

-"i... declare... bAnkrUptCY"

-"are we watching a movie?" "maybe if we're lucky it's the ring and it'll kill us"

-lmao i don't need drugs to feel numb

-"aww, flynn, we know you're drinkin' a bottle in the back room" "yeah, just look at ya, why wouldn't i?"

-The Weed™

-"weed stops your sperm from being produced correctly" "perfect, it's birth control too"

-"weed might shrink your... parts" "i think i'll just stick to meth"

-"weed might give you a special needs child" "it's wilson 2.0!"

-"i'm gonna be a drug dealer but not a mean one like a nice, happy 'eyy, wanna buy some drugs? :3'"

-oh no, grandma's growing weed in the basement

-"ahh, the weed's on fire"

-"guess that's how they caught the drug dealers. the deer were high"

-teacher: "ooh, i just sounded like yoda: don't smoke The Weed™"

-"hey, where can you buy a still? asking for a cousin"

-"raise your hand if you want to watch hentai"

-this guy keeps responding to people with "yes, my child?"

-"they put aborted fetuses in vaccines" "oh honey no"

-"how do you keep yourself from getting sick?" "stop breathing"

-examples of painkillers- "cocaine"

-"i know elvis presley is still alive because the king never dies"

-biggest drinker in our grade: "am i gonna be an alcoholic?" class: "you already are"

-c o m p r o m i s i n g  p o s i t i o n

-"trick question, i am hentai"

-"what would you do... if i said i could put you in your own hentai"

-"you're gettin' a hole in your nose oh my goodness"

-"depression" "nope" "wait... depression"

-"I can't remember the happiness i felt before drugs" "i can't remember feeling happiness at all"

-"oh you're back! just in time for meth"

-"oh my garage"

-"lotta meth in that town" "nah just incest"

-"it kills your brain cells. which some of you can't afford (staring directly at the class alcoholic)"

-"why do dentists have the highest suicide rate?? probably because everyone hates the dentist, i dunno"

-"that's accusations" "uuuuuhh no" "oh"

-"oh my gads. you got some meth?"

-"in the puss!" "terms" "sorry. vag!"

-"there's a pretty good chance that drug came out of someone's anal cavity" "that's why i don't do heroin"

-"hey, whose buttocks did this come out of?"

"i'm gonna go shoot myself with some dog food, brb"

-"oh my chicken pie"

-"i've been told we're gonna draw a penis"

-help they're genuinely discussing giving babies steroids

-"most of the female reproductive cells are useless" "just like my brain cells"

-the teacher keeps referring to developing babies as "little rat" and "alien creature"

-"if you eat my period snacks, i will eat you"

-*chiming* "is that santa??"

-"what's the only fluid that doesn't go to the baby?" "water" "no" "air" "no" "earth" "..." "fire"

-"you're supposed to snort those calcium pills" "don't snort the calcium pills"

-"mr. o'reilly, when'd you miss your period?"

-"is it true you puke the day after you get pregnant?" "no, if you puke the day after, it's from the alcohol the night before"

-fetus = jumbo shrimp

- i too, am a very sad lookin' heart

-"no, you cannot throw up your baby"

-"now that we've taken the baby home, we need to figure out what to do with it" "flush it down the toilet"

-"if you wear a hat all the time, all your hair is gonna fall out and die" "ha ha kevin, you're gonna die"

-"since i was 14. and i'm 112"

-"big dumb"

-"what do you want to be when you grow up?" "dead"

-"my parents say: 'hey... whatcha doin' with that 24-pack?'"

-"did jeffery dahmer's mom love him?" "hope not"

-"ohh i love the smell of babies *sniff sniff*"

-"they can be found in places that are... places"

-"why are there rotting apples under here?" "no you gotta let those ferment"

-"what's something you lose by age 3?" "hope"

-the guy in front of me had marvel porn on his phone????????????? hentai hulk's bright red ass is permanently ingrained in my mind

-"what am i supposed to do to live 2 more years? wrap myself in bubble wrap and eat brussel sprouts?"

-"for every 10 pounds overweight you are, subtract 1." "-50"

-"you're wearing a flamingo shirt, you're no one's favorite"

-"you don't snort viagra"

-"how do you feel about having guns in our home?" "how do you feel about how quickly i'd use it to kill myself?"

-"hey, 2 seniors walking down the hallway! wanna give her your papers?" "outta my way. hey! get back here and gimme your papers, ya bums."

-"it's not just the genitals that transfer STDs" "left calf"

-"what if they got an STD some other way?" "drinking sprite"

-"...serial monogamy-" "cereal is for mornings"

-"...trading sex for-" "chicken nugget"

-"you wanna try sex wearing a hazmat suit, go ahead" "don't kinkshame me"

-"STI: spaghetti time infection. it's an epidemic"

-"g- ross"

-"AIDS didn't come from sex with a monkey" "it's definitely about sex with monkeys"

-"what kinds of drugs do i need if i have AIDS?" "nothing, you wanna die"

-"do you know what they do to get rid of genital warts?" "chop your dick off" "mix wart cream with water and drink it"

-oh no they found out what they do get rid of genital warts

-"they shove a q-tip in your penis" "iiiiii'd rather die"

-"is that what tinder is? swipe right if you want crabs?"

-"i would suggest not setting your genitals on fire"

- "your penis doesn't do tricks"

-"do you have a driver's license? *nod* "do you have a car?" *nod* "are you a big boy?" *unsure nod*

-"i know it's only the last day but i will make you suffer for every last minute" "then i'll just do what i always do *sleeps*"

-our resident alcoholic was washing the board and people were jokingly flirting with him so he tied his shirt into a bikini and continued washing so the teacher docked him points for it. don't worry he was already failing

[taxesdeathtrouble]

past Saturday night

so this is my unedited gertchase fic that i’ve been working on the past couple days because i’m obsessed

~3000 words

the title’s from Etta James’ ‘Sunday kind of love’

enjoy!

1. Its after a meeting when he realizes. The six of them are sitting in a circle at Timely trying to make a decision for once, arguing over who's house to go to first to look for a book they'd heard their parents talking about.

"Okay, how about we split into groups of two, check three houses, then get back together to check mine and Karolina's houses?"

Everyone nods, and Alex continues, "Okay, so Nico and I will go to her house, Karolina and Molly will go to Molly's, and Gert and Chase will go to his house. Set? Okay, let's go." Karolina stares after Nico as she leaves, only looking away when Molly nudges her shoulder. God, Chase is so glad he backed off; it clearly was never going to go anywhere.

Gert stands up, and of course he follows her out they get to their cars, then pause.

"Your car or mine?" Chase shouldn't blush, because that does not sound dirty, why did he even think that, what the hell.

"Uh, if you think I'm passing up a chance to ride in the fanciest sports car of the century, you are sadly mistaken, my friend."

Friend. That sounds nice. He wishes he'd never said that they weren't. He wishes that he wasn't so fucking stupid.

Because that's what he is, right? He can design gloves that shoot fire but not know when a girl isn't into him, not know how to deal with how he feels about his father, not know how to deal with liking Gert.

Woah, WHAT?

The wheel jerks in his hands, almost sending them off the road, and he decides to focus on driving instead of this- this revelation.

"Dude, be careful. Jeez, Karolina is a better driver than you."

Oh right, Gert is in the car with him. Shit. Can't he deal with his feelings in peace? He keeps his eyes on the road, determined not to look at her, her soft face and gorgeous hair that always looks good- he has to take fifteen minutes every morning to get his hair to look marginally fine, and she pulls a hairbrush through it and she looks like she just stepped off a Pantene commercial set. It's unfair, is what it is.

"Hey, I resent that." Okay, this is good. Playful banter is good. Not revealing just discovered feelings is good.

"Why? Don't you think she's perfect or something?" Oh, shit. Chase wishes he had spidey sense like that vigilante up in New York, then he'd know when he was about to get caught in a complicated bit of conversation.

"Not really. We're friends, you know? And I mean, Karolina is great, and everything, but.....I don't feel that way about her. At least, not anymore."

"Oh."

Yes, oh.

2. Chase doesn't like the way Gert makes his heart feel. The record speed pounding whenever they're alone, the way it feels like his heart is being squeezed too tight whenever he sees her with someone else.....it's almost physically painful.

Like right now. They're at Timely, helping each with homework, and she's flirting with some floppy haired barista while she waits for their drinks (sugar hopped coffee for her, decaf for him), which she'd decided would be a good incentive for him to work on his Spanish. She'd told him to look over his notes while she grabbed the coffee, but he couldn't bring himself to focus. Like, at all. He's pretty sure he hasn't taken his eyes off Gert since she got up from the chair across from him.

Predictably, as soon as she starting talking to the barista, Chase's heart started up the oh-so painful squeezing. And really, he could just look away. But she's just so bright. Smiling and talking and being  so irreplaceably Gert that he doesn't even care that it's not directed at him. Except, that's stupid, because of course he does. He's green eyed monster levels of jealous. If Gert were talking to him instead of that dumb barista and also could read his mind she'd probably say that that's his teenage boy brain talking. But whatever, Chase is actually a teenage boy, so, suck it.

Upon realizing that he's pseudo-arguing with Gert in his head when she is literally, actually, ten feet away from him, Chase gets up and walks over, plucking his drink out of her hand, and takes a sip.

"So I was totally hyped to see it , then- Chase. I was just about to come back to our table, you could have waited another minute."

"Yes, but then I wouldn't have this sweet, sweet coffee in my hands. Also, I accidentally took yours and that is a lot of sugar."

She snatches it back and hands him his coffee, giving him her patented 'you're a dummy but you're being really cute about it' look. At least, that's what he hopes it means.

The barista catches his eye, and, dejectedly, goes to serve a customer.

3. Gert has never looked more stunning in her entire life, Chase is sure of it.

She's walking down the aisle, the train of her dress trailing behind her, and she's positively glowing. He can see her hands shake as they clutch the yellow rose bouquet- Karolina had said that yellow represents eternal happiness, or something, so they'd gone with that.

All their friends are seated in the pews, dressed in their Sunday best for the (secretly named by Chase) Best Wedding Of All Time. Nico even wore a colour other than black, though Karolina had had to wager something to do so- Chase still isn't sure what.

She's in front of him, now, and the ceremony starts. They'd asked Alex to do the ceremony only a few weeks before the wedding (poor planning) but at least he was, for some reason, already ordained at 23 years old. He's ridiculously emotional all the way through, and so is Gert, in that way where she's trying really hard not to be too sappy. Chase already is too sappy, but he doesn't care; His vows dive deep into that sappiness, actually, and hers aren't much past it. Chase isn't sure when he started crying, but he just can't seem to stop.

He's so unbelievably happy.

And then he wakes up.

He wipes the tears away, and grabs his phone. 4: 23 AM. Dammit. He really needs to stop this. Since he'd had his World's Biggest Dumbass moment a few weeks ago and realized just how much he likes Gert, he's been having this same dream every night, with more details added on every time he falls asleep like a twenty car pileup of 'I have feelings for Gertrude Yorkes'.

He considers calling her, just to get her voice out of his head, but it's past four in the morning, there's no possible way that she's awake, and calling would just piss her off.

But then she's calling him, which is so unprecedented that he almost forgets to pick up the phone. He does pick up, though, because he does have a few brain cells still alive up there.

"Did you know that Molly has started making a harness for my dinosaur?" he can only kind of see Gert in the dark of her room on the video call, but her voice is somehow jittery and dead tired all at once.

"What, really?"

"Yeah, she wants to ride her. For fun. Ugh, sisters."

Chase stifles a laugh, and lets her go on about an argument they'd had today. He's glad he doesn't have a light on, or he's sure that he'd look ridiculously heartsick.

"Yeah, so Molly really wants to go see it, but I told her sitting in a dark theatre for a couple of hours just the two of us would turn us into sitting ducks, and she said not to overthink, but-"

"You're overthinking it?"

"Yes! And it's totally unlike me to be so paranoid, but after what happened with Alex....."

"No, I get it. If you want......I could go with you? To the movie? If it would make you feel better." Oh Jesus. Did he really just do that? Oh Jesus.

"Yeah, it would make me feel better, actually. Safety in numbers and all that, right?"

"Right." Oh god.

"Wait, Chase. What time is it?"

"About 4:40? Why?"

"Wow, my insomnia reaches new heights. Sorry for waking you up."

"you didn't, I was already awake."

"Bad dream?"

"More like complicated dream." She makes a questioning noise, and he realizes that he probably shouldn't have said that. Gert is definitely going to want to know what he's talking about.

"Uhmm, I should go, gotta get some semblance of sleep, bye Gert!"

And then he hangs up. Phew. That was close.

4. The movie theatre is dark, and kind of crowded. Gert is sitting in between him and Molly, who is watching the movie avidly. It's some overcomplicated horror movie that neither he nor Gert has been able to pay attention to. They've been quietly throwing popcorn at each other since the movie started.

"Guys," Molly whispers when a piece of popcorn hits her, "Pay attention!"

They turn back to the movie, a little guiltily, and attempt to follow the plot.

Ten minutes later, Chase yawns and stretches his arm back, back, back over the top of Gert's seat. It's, to be honest, the cheesiest thing he's ever done. Gert's shoulders tense, then she leans against him, just a little, and it makes him want to jump for joy.

He catches Molly's eye over Gert's head, and sees she's trying not laugh. Like, really trying (It's not working very well). He glares at her, tries to be intimidating as possible, but she's still giggling. Whatever.

He moves his hand, minutely, up and down her shoulder. If this was literally any other girl he would have kissed her by now. Gotten it over with, been together.

But she's not any other girl. She's Gert. Gert, with the opinions and snark and her own unique brand of perfect that Chase still hasn't figured out how not to be affected by.

He can't just make out with her, out of the blue and unprecedented. He has to let it build, let them get closer and closer, before he asks her quietly, softly, when they're all alone, if he can kiss her.

He knows that that's sappy, to plan out how he wants to ask her out (if he ever does),  but he really can't bring himself to care. He wants to have a plan, it helps him compartmentalize how he feels. Although that's probably not healthy, to be honest......

"Hey, are you okay?" Gert whispers. She looks concerned.

"Um, yeah, yes. I am. Why?"

She reaches up and softly smoothes her thumb over the crease between his eyebrows; His eyes fall closed.

She pulls back her hand, seeming to realize what she's doing.

"You looked worried, that's all."

5. "How long have you liked Gert, again?"

"About two months- wait, Jesus. I didn't mean to tell you that."

Karolina laughs. "Which is why I tried to catch you off guard with it. It's okay, though. I'm not going to tell her, though I do think you should." they're drinking together on Karolina's terrace, a break from all that's been going on. Unhealthy coping mechanisms for the win!

"Oh, no-o way. Nuh-uh. Not a chance. If I tell her, and she doesn't like me back, which she won't, because she at most only finds me attractive and thats it, it will ruin our friendship, which I don't want to do because then the group might get messed up, which we can't afford, because our parents are fucking murderers! Yeah!" he takes another big swig of vodka, and she follows his lead, though she chugs more than sips because she's drinking rosé in a can, the genius.

Karolina, bless her, moves past his mini meltdown to say, "Oh, she finds you attractive? And you noticed?  Where was this observant Chase Stein when you were convinced you were into me?" she nudges him, teasing. She's definitely tipsy, sober Karolina is too sincere about things to make fun of anyone.

"Where was he when I kissed you? Jesus, I was dumb."

"True, so true." they clink their drinks together in camaraderie.

"Hey."

"Hey, what?"

"You should call her." for a girl that looks so angelic, Karolina sure does have a devil's smile.

"No, I should not."

"Yes, you should, but if you won't, I will!"

She pulls out her phone, tugging off her bracelet and shooting into the sky before he can grab the phone from her.

She lies horizontal, three feet above him at standing height, just out of his reach.

"Gertie!! Hi, sweet cheeks, how you doing?"

"Uh, well, you're drunk calling me at 1 AM so..." oh Jesus, she put her on speakerphone.

"Karolina, oh my god, hang up!"

"Not until you talk to her!" he's trying to grab at her sweater and pull her down but it is Not Working.

"Is that Chase?" her voice is sort of crinkly through the phone, but it's definitely her. Chase doesn't have enough luck for Karolina to call the wrong number.

He sits down again. He's not going to get her to come down, and the alcohol is starting to make him dizzy.

"Yes! Here, talk to him."

"Oh my god, Karolina, what the shit!" he says as he sprints to catch the phone before it smashes on the ground into a million pieces.

"Heyyy, Gert."

"Hi? What was that?"

"Karolina just yote her phone at me and I had to go catch it."

"Did you just use 'yeet' in the past tense?"

"....Yes." he's drunker than he thought he was, Jesus.

"Do you need a ride or something or am I just Karolina's drunk dial?"

"He needs a ride!" Karolina says, swooping down and practically yelling into his ear.

"Jesus, Karolina, way to give me a heart attack."

"Oh, you poor, poor, baby. Anyways, Gert, yes, he would like a ride. It's late, anyways. We're at my house, see you then!"

And then she hangs up.

"What, pray tell, the fuck, Karolina."

Gert gets to the house 20 minutes later, parking in her parents beat up monstrosity.

"And that's my cue," Karolina says, getting up, "Bye, Gert! See ya later!"

Gert sits down next to him and pushes a bottle of water into his hands.

"So vodka, huh? I always thought you were more of a scotch kind of guy." she says as he swallows it down.

He puts the now half empty bottle aside and says, "I am, but I can't drink scotch out of the bottle without making a face. Vodka, though, I have perfected my reaction too, so I can drink and still look cool."

"Chase, dude, never once has anyone thought you cool. Come on, let's go."

"Okay, but I want you to know that what you just said was offensive and hurt my feelings. You're going to have fight for my forgiveness."

"I'm making sure you don't walk home, isn't that enough?"

"Hmm, maybe."

They drive in relative silence, save for bursts of quiet banter. When they reach his house, he grabs her hand and thanks her.

"It was really nice of you, you're so nice, thanks again." (he's still kind of drunk.)

And then, he does the unthinkable.

He leans in, slowly, and presses his lips to hers, softly, a whisper of a touch.

But he still kissed her.

He's halfway up the drive before he realizes what he's done.

+1. He wakes up the next morning and promptly freaks the fuck out.

Well, actually, untrue. First he takes an aspirin for his hangover. Then he freaks out.

Because, really, what was he thinking? He had a plan. He had a  specific way he wanted to do that. And then he went and just kissed her, out of the blue, unprecedented, exactly the way he hadn't wanted to do it.

She definitely knew he liked her, now.

Monday he goes out of his way to avoid her, even though he shouldn't. He makes sure he doesn't cross paths with her, and he makes it until he gets pulled into a broom closet on the way to fourth period.

"What the- Oh. Hey, Gert."

"......Hi." she's fiddling with the hem of her shirt, like she always does when she's nervous.

"Um, Gert. I want to apologize. What I did Saturday night....that wasn't okay. I shouldn't have kissed you out of the blue like that," he had a plan, "It's okay if you don't want to talk to me for a while, I guess."

She looks down, shoulders hunched. He wishes he wasn't responsible for her acting this way, wishes she wasn't upset.

"You know, in case my feelings for you make you.....uncomfortable, or whatever." Chase leans against the door, getting ready to flee the scene and recuperate on Mars, or something.

"Woah, you actually have feelings for me? Shit, I totally thought you were messing with me or you were just too drunk, or whatever-" He reaches out and squeezes her arm.

"Gert. You're literally the coolest, most unique girl I've ever met. I think you're gorgeous and smart and awesome and way too good for me. But I," he pulls back, "I get that you don't feel that way, and I'll back off. I promise."

"Well, you....you shouldn't."

And then she kisses him.

It's not perfect. It's a little messy, and he has to lean down so she isn't on her tiptoes. But then he changes the angle, and her hand goes in his hair as he wraps his arms around her.

They miss fourth period. Chase can't say he cares much, though.

FIN

[folklore-musings]

Camera Shy (part 9)

Camera Shy:  AU. Jughead is an aspiring photographer. His final project requires him to shoot nude photos of someone who inspires him. With no one else to ask Jughead asks Betty. Insecure of her body Betty is quick to shoot the idea down, until Jughead reminds her that she owes him.

Read on AO3 here

Read on Tumblr: Part 1  / Part 2  /  Part 3  /  Part 4  /  Part 5  /  Part 6  /    Part 7  / Part 8

A/N: I know I said tomorrow, but look at this! I busted it out earlier than expected!  I really have nothing to say except I'm sorry this chapter took a lot longer than expected. Also - thank you so much for all the wonderful reviews and comments. You are all so amazing, I hope you enjoy this next chapter. It was hell to write.

Jughead paces back and forth down the hallway while Betty sits in the bathroom, peeing on a plastic stick that may or may not determine their entire future. “Did you put a timer on?” Betty asks from the other side of the door. She refuses to let him watch her, it’s not like he’s never seen her naked before.

“I got it babe.” Jughead forces out. While he waits, he runs into his room and grabs his Polaroid. Whether it’s a single line or a double, this moment demands to be documented. Either the first of many baby pictures or just a photo they’ll laugh at years from now, when the worst thing they ever thought could happen was becoming parents.

When the timer on his phone begins to sound Jughead pushes his way into the bathroom. He doesn’t care if Betty’s squatting on the toilet with her pants pooled around her ankles. He needs to be a part of this moment. It’s his problem too.

Betty’s dressed and sitting on the edge of the tub. She has her hands over her eyes as if she’s participating in a game of “Peek-a-boo” with a small child. Jughead sets his camera down on the counter and walks towards her. He removes her hands from her face and pulls her to her feet. Once she’s steady he takes her hands and kisses each of her fingertips before interlocking their fingers together.

“Are you ready?”

There are tears lining her cheeks but she nods, hiccupping from all the crying she’s done that morning. “It’s on the counter. I can’t bring myself to look at it.”

Jughead releases the hold he has on her hands and picks up his Polaroid. He brings the camera to his eyes and focuses on the pregnancy test sitting beside it. Through the lens he reads his fate and snaps a photo. The sound of the picture printing is all he can hear, thundering in his ears. His heart races like the wings of a hummingbird. He takes the photo and stares at it, watching and waiting as the image forms and clears. With trembling fingers he hands it over to Betty, leaning in to press his lips to her forehead.

“Oh.” Is all that escapes her lips before a new round of tears cloud her eyes. The photo shakes in her hand and Jughead envelops Betty in his arms, wrapping her up in hug so tight he’s afraid he may suffocate her. He wants to wash away all her worries and her fears. He wants her to say something more than ‘oh’. He wants her to stop crying and talk to him.

Betty pushes him away and tosses the picture on the counter. He watches her turn right out the door, knowing she’s headed for her bedroom. He hears the slamming of her door. His heart crashes in a blazing fire in the pit of his chest. He grabs the test and the photo from the counter; tossing the test in the garbage and taking the Polaroid with him into his room. He grabs a pen and captions the image.

Oh Baby!

He pins the photo to the wall above his bed and swallows the lump in his throat. He needs to get up. He needs to leave. He needs to talk to Archie.

Jughead throws on a shirt and stalks across the hall. It’s barely 8 am and remembering the night before, his friends are probably sleeping off their hangovers but he doesn’t care. He pounds his fist on the door until it opens.

“May I help you?” Archie groans. Jughead walks right past him and begins pacing circles in their kitchen, playing with the sleep tousled curls on his head. “Sure, come on in Jughead.” Archie says sarcastically as he shuts the door. When Jughead says nothing Archie starts to worry. “Dude what’s wrong? You’re starting to freak me out.”

Jughead looks up from the floor and shoots Archie a look that he can only imagine is his version of the crazy eyes. “Betty -“ He mumbles, but when he does his voice breaks and the whole morning crashes into him like a Tsunami wave.

Archie’s eyes open wide in fear. “What’s wrong with Betty?”

Jughead tries to speak but he feels the tears spark in his eyes and he lifts his fists to his eyes and determinedly fights away the crying. He refuses to cry. He’s not going to let himself fall apart in Archie and Ronnie’s kitchen.

When Archie places a soothing hand on his back the waterfall begins. “Ah. Fuck.” Jughead cries, sniffling through the tears.

“Did she break up with you? What the fuck is going on Jug?”

Jughead shakes his head at Archie’s assumption and just lets his shoulders vibrate as he cries. He wills himself to stop but there is no magic off switch for the faucet currently pouring from his tear ducts. He needs to kick something, needs to hit something, anything.

He takes a deep, shaky breath and opens his mouth to speak. “Give me something to break before I punch a hole in your wall.”

Archie is quick to move over an arm’s length away from Jughead and reaches into the cupboard above the sink. “Here. It’s a china pattern that Ronnie’s grandma gave to us, and we hate it, but don’t have the heart to get rid of it.”

Jughead takes the plate from Archie and putting all his weight behind it, throws it against the wall. The plate shatters into hundreds of little pieces and Jughead’s heart is pounding like a sledgehammer in his chest. “Have you got anymore?”

Archie stacks up all the floral patterned china plates on the kitchen table and Jughead breaks them one by one, the frustration in his body simmering with every plate.

After the third one, Ronnie stomps into the room. “What the hell is going on in here? Is that my grandmother’s good china?”

Jughead grabs another plate and smashes it. “Archie said it was OK.” The fourth plate falls to the ground, blending in with the broken pieces before it.

Veronica turns on Archie and his cheeks almost match the color of his hair. “It was either that or he punched a hole in our wall Babe. What was I supposed to do?”

“Arch, plaster is a quick fix. That china is worth hundreds of dollars.” Jughead throws another plate.

“So you’re saying I should stop?” Jughead asks, holding a plate back, ready to nail it against the wall.

Veronica gives him a pointed look, her lips pursed in a straight line. “Yeah, that’d be a good idea. Unless you’d like to lose the ability to have children?”

“If only you would have done that a month ago.” Jughead breathes. At the sound of the word children, the sixth plate slips from Jughead’s slick grip and falls to the floor. “I gotta go.”

Without another word he says goodbye and heads for the door, leaving Ronnie and Archi standing there, baffled and confused. He crosses the hall and forces his way into his and Betty’s apartment. Grabbing two water bottles from the fridge he walks down to Betty’s room and let’s himself in, refusing to give her the option to turn him away.

All he can see of Betty is her blonde hair cascading over her floral pillow case. The rest of her body is consumed by her sheets and comforter. He can’t hear her crying, so he takes that as a good sign. Leaving the bottled water on her night stand, he shuffles into her bed and under the covers. “Betty?” He rubs a shaky hand along her trembling back and pulls her body into him. “Betty… Baby everything is going to be OK.”

Her head shakes back and forth against his chest and she begins to cry once more. “N-n-no its n-not.” Betty’s just barely able to choke out the words. “This wasn’t s-supposed t-t-t-to happen. N-not this w-way. Not r-right now.”

Jughead holds her against him, attempting to calm her woes by rubbing soft circles into her back. He leans down and presses his lips to her forehead. “Betts please stop crying. Maybe it’s a false positive. That’s likely, right?”

Betty sniffles and looks up at him. Her blue green eyes are bright and shiny, her cheeks are red and her lips are puffy and tender. In some sadistic way Jughead tells himself she’s never looked more beautiful. “I g-guess so.” She mumbles. She places a kiss along the edge of his chin and sighs, letting herself melt into his body. “What are we going to do?”

Jughead throws the blanket off of them and jumps to his feet. “It is…” he glances at Betty’s clock on her nightstand. “…wow already 10 in the morning. Time travels fast when you’re freaking out.” Betty’s lip begins to quiver once more. “We are going to eat lots of Captain Crunch, stay in our pajamas all day, and watch lots and lots of movies.”

“I have to work this afternoon.” Betty cries, grabbing the blankets and throwing them back over her, shielding herself from the outside world.

Jughead forces the blanket off of Betty. “Call in sick. Which, you technically are.” Betty chews on her lip for a moment, finally nodding and deciding that was probably the best idea. She is no condition to go to work today.

“OK.” She shuffles out of bed and grabs her bathrobe from the hook hanging on her door. “I’m going to go take a bubble bath. Maybe that’ll help calm me down.”

Jughead follows Betty out of her bedroom and kisses her lips softly before she disappears into the bathroom. He decides to ignore the fact that Betty still hasn’t mentioned the ‘I love you’ he had confessed earlier that morning. He wasn’t sure whether her ignorance on the subject was a good or bad sign.

꙰

Betty pulls up the ‘Down in the Dumps’ playlist on Spotify and slithers into the steaming water of the bathtub. The water is scalding on her skin, but Betty enjoys the sting, finding it surprisingly welcoming. She places a rolled up towel beneath her neck and closes her eyes, letting the music drown out the static in her brain.

She curses herself for being so unprepared and irresponsible. She should have gotten on the pill sooner or they should have used a condom. How could she have been so stupid? She should have warned Jughead that they weren’t being safe, instead of allowing herself to swept up in the moment. She knew the pull-out method was not an effective form of birth control. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

In an effort to keep the tears at bay Betty opens up her eyes and examines her body beneath the water. Most of the bubbles have evaporated and the water is clear. She looks to her stomach and her breasts, imagining them swollen and expanded. Her body was the least of her worries, but it was still a worry nonetheless.

She remembers when her oldest sister Polly had given birth to twins back in high school. Suddenly Betty feels an obsessive need to talk to her, to tell her how sorry she is that she had to go through her pregnancy all alone, unable to confide in Betty about her problems because their parents were a special breed of crazy.

Betty reaches for her phone sitting on the floor beside the tub and pauses the current song. With quick fingers she dials Polly’s number and counts the amount of rings it takes until she answers. When she does she can hear the twins laughing and giggling in the background and strangely Betty finds herself missing the little town she grew up in.

“Hi Betty!” Polly’s cheery voice sings over the line.

“Hey Polly,” Betty’s voice cracks and she already regrets calling her sister. She doesn’t need to burden her with her own problems. Plus she wasn’t ready for this news to travel back to their mother in any way. Yet somehow Alice Cooper always found a way to figure out everything. It was like she was part of an underground network or something, it was creepy.

“Betty, is everything alright? Are you crying?”

Betty sits up in the tub and water splashes over the side. “It’s nothing Poll. I shouldn’t have called you.” Her thumb hovers over the little red cancel button but Betty resists pressing it.

“It doesn’t sound like nothing, come on, you know you can tell me anything.” It frightens Betty how well her sister knows her. “Is this about Jughead?”

Betty clears her throat and answers. “No – I mean – yes. Sort of. I don’t know.”

“You are aware of the fact that nothing you’re saying is making sense right now?” Polly asks with concern in her voice. Betty had always been the sensible one in the family.

“Polly, I-I don’t know what to do.” Betty mumbles into the phone. Her lips quiver and she urges herself not to cry.  She already has a headache, she doesn’t need to aggravate it any more than she already has.

“Just tell me what’s going on Betty. You called for a reason. And you know me. I am the no judgement sister. Anything you say to me stays between you and I.” Betty hears her nephew JJ in the background, asking if Polly will let them watch cartoons. From what she can only assume her sister agrees and walks out of the room and out of earshot of the children.

“Everything OK out there in Riverdale?” Betty asks.

“Just peachy. Can you believe the twins are going to be seven soon?” Betty can hear the smile in Polly’s voice and Betty can’t help but smile too. She misses her family so much.

”No I can’t. Time sure does go by a lot faster now than when we were their age. Back then time seemed infinite.”

“Nothing’s infinite Betty, you know that. Just wait until you have kids and the time will fly by even faster than it is now. I promise you that.” Betty’s heart beats frantically in her chest at Polly’s words. She had no idea. “Now please tell me what’s bothering you. You know how I get when I worry.”

Betty chuckles. “You sound like such a mom.” Betty takes a deep breath and swallows the lump in her throat. “Speaking of moms…I’m going to be one. I’m pregnant.”

The line goes silent and Betty worries that the call may have dropped. She removes the phone from her ear and checks to make sure Polly’s still on the line. She closes her eyes in relief when she sees the call is still there.

“Oh my – Betty are you sure?”

Betty lifts her knees to her chest and rests her chin on her left knee. “I mean, I’m fairly certain. I haven’t been keeping track of the calendar but I’m over a week late. And I was nauseous this morning. Although we did have drinks last night, but not enough to make me sick. Which now I’m also beginning to worry about - what if I hurt the baby, drinking last night because I didn’t know?” With her free hand Betty digs her nails into the flesh of her palms. An old habit she’d had when she was younger that she’d kicked so many years ago.

“Betty Betty Betty. Slow down. Everything is going to be OK. Make an appointment with your doctor. Get checked up. They’ll tell you everything you need to know. There’s no reason to worry now. You’re main focus should be making sure that you’re healthy.” Polly pauses and Betty’s makes a mental note to call her doctor.

“Both you and Jughead both keep saying everything is going to be OK. How do you know that?” Betty cries into the phone, clutching it harder than necessary as she holds it up to her ear.

“Because I’m a mom, I know things. And don’t shut Jughead out right now. I can guarantee he’s as freaked out as you are. Go talk to him. Figure things out.” On the other end Betty hears the sound of glass shattering. ”Damn it not again. I’m sorry Betty I have to go. Call me if you need me. Keep me updated. And I promise not to say anything about this to mom.”

Betty thanks her sister and wishes her a goodbye. Once the line is dead she places her phone on the lid of the toilet and pulls the plug in the tub. The water disappears around her, leaving her feeling cold and empty. Goosebumps litter her skin as she stands up and dries off with the towel from the rack, before placing her bathrobe around her and exiting the bathroom, in search of Jughead.

She finds him back in the kitchen with a new bowl of cereal in front of him, chomping down rather sullenly. He looks up when she enters the room and lends her a soft smile. “Feeling any better?”

Betty stands on her tiptoes to grab a bowl from the cupboards and a spoon from the drawer beside the fridge. At the sight of the cereal her stomach lurches, suddenly ravenous. “I called Polly.”

Jughead nods and continues to chew. “Good to know. I thought maybe you were talking to yourself in there. I was a little worried for a moment, thinking you were going crazy.”

Betty shoves his shoulder playfully and settles into the chair beside him. She creates a mountain of cereal in her bowl and floods it with milk, taking a bite of the sweet, crunchy cereal. “Ha ha.” She says between bites. “You’d still love me even if I were crazy right?”

She hasn’t forgotten about what he said to her, she’d just been too busy obsessing over the pregnancy test to really make any note of it.

Jughead places his spoon in the bowl and scoots his chair to the side so that he’s facing her. He grabs her by the face, regardless of the fact she’s still chewing and kisses her lips soundly. “If you’re crazy Betty Cooper, then I’m fucking insane.” He says, staring her dead in the eyes.

Betty is quick to swallow the cereal in her mouth and mirrors Jughead’s actions. She holds his face between her hands and squishes his cheeks, just the way he was doing to her. “How are you not freaking out more right now?” She asks him, kissing him chastely.

“Because I love you, and I know that as long as we’re together everything will be alright.” He responds, leaning forward to kiss the tip of her nose.

Betty closes her eyes at the touch of his lips, and when she opens them she forgets to breathe. Forehead to forehead they sit there, gazing into each other’s eyes as they hold each other’s faces in place. Jughead’s eyes are a brilliant swirl of blue and Betty swears she could look into them forever and never get bored.  A thought crosses her mind where she hopes the baby has his eyes. She realizes there no one else she’d rather be caught up in this mess with except for him.

Betty kisses Jughead one more time, deeper than before and pulls away, hungry for her cereal. “By the way Jughead,” She says with a mouth full of Captain Crunch. “I love you too.”

[defunctblogtobedeleted]

11/7/19 3:27am - Three Dates, Three Girls, Three Days

So after me and Jill had a nice night out and fucked again I had to go home to play poker with Velli and get ready for my date with Maria that day.

We had a score to settle, after the night we spent watching kakegurui he was obsessed and wanted to get her as a waifu from me in the stupid discord waifu game if I’ve mentioned that. So I told him I’d give him the main character for all of undertale and he said I was on some shit. I told him we could gamble for it, since that’s what yumeko would do. So we made these plans to play texas hold’em until someone lost. 

Of course he did. It kind of came down to the first hand, tbh. He hit a pair off the flop but I hit a three of a kind and he didn’t want to believe I’d have a 4 in my opening hand and bet on it, so he started raising ME and gave me almost all his chips right off the bat. So I won waifus. And we watched more kakegurui until it was time for Maria to come pick me up for a date that we’d arranged.

We went out to raleigh times and got tacos, and went to boxcar and played some games. She’s pretty competitive, but I kicked her ass at galaga :3 turns out she likes the same arcade games as me. We played some air hockey, and she fucking railed me at skee ball. We played some space invaders and then bounced out to karaoke. Skylar finally sang for the first time! but I missed it and he said he was pumped to do another though, so I ended up singing She Bangs by Ricky Martin with him lol. Also sang Maria by green day because I wanted to embarrass her a bit. Or make her heart flutter. Same difference, right? we’d already kissed a few times before we made it over to Neptune’s, so things were going swimmingly. We had already discussed going back to my place to drink after bars before she picked me up for the date, but it was locked in after she met all my friends.

This cutey was saying this stuff on the walk back. She proclaimed that I was the male version of her, and I loved that because we’re both narcissistic as fuck. She was also telling me how she loved seeing me interact with everyone and that I was so cute and that if I had gone home with someone else instead of her she wouldn’t have even minded just as a friend. And I was like wow. Man. Perfect! Wow. That’s a lot but I dig it. And then we talked about having a threesome with her guy friend that doesn’t wanna do anything more than kiss a dude. She said she loves how open I am and how willing I am to experiment with things. We made it back to my place and she loved my room and my house and we fucked. Real. Hard. It was great. Started nice and slow, warmed up everything, ate her out for a while, fucked for a bit, came, explained how I could go for a round two without refractory period and she was like “wow. You’re woman’s best friend.” Then she wanted me to actually pound on her for a while which felt exxxxcellent, but eventually we needed to take a food break lol. I damn near set my house on fire trying to bake these sammies in the oven and pick them up with a paper towel. I was drunk enough that I touched the heating elements or some shit and just lit the shit on fire and was like flapping trying to put it out until I threw it in the sink lmfao. Luckily no harm no foul but I’ve gotta use spatulas more hahaha. Why the fuck don’t I have a pair of tongs in my house. She actually wanted me to fuck her in the kitchen while I cooked the sandwiches. Perfect. Checked that one off, but had to cut it off pretty quick since they were done fast. Watched some parks and rec naked on the couch. Went back to my room when the sandwiches were done and fucked more until I could finally get off again and then we collapsed in a hot sweaty puddle and curled up to sleep for the night. 

Woke up in the morning at like 11, was maybe supposed to meet Elyse at 11 or 4, so I was like oh shit, but it turned out she didn’t want to hang until 2. So me and Maria fucked again, “2 for 2″ she said. Not sure if it was sexing or her cumming, but seemed approving lmao, and she left me to enjoy her day off and let me get some sleep before work. 

Instead I took a shower, tried to get a new CRT from my buddy, it wouldn’t fit in my car. 

Then I met up with Elyse at Umstead Park and we went on a run together. I haven’t exercised with someone in fucking years, but I’d do it for her. We kept pace together pretty well, had a nice little 3 mile run, then hung out by these cabins touching each others’ arms and backs and hair and chit chatting about each other. I kissed her a little, but she seemed very tentative. Though she did kiss me back a second time. We rode off and got a beer down the road from the park, talked about some ideas for fetish stuff and our interests and how things have developed a little bit. I really wanna see what her take on primal play is; that’s where she says she gets her kitty nature. Its pretty sexciting.

We went off to target to try and get me some pore cleanser (pork rinds? Pork lenser? lol) but couldn’t find it, and I had to run off to a JKCF scholarship meetup dinner, so she kissed me goodbye and we parted ways.

Not quite as exciting as my date with Mariah, and a lot less moaning involved. Though I did hear a lot of the same panting noises during the run. Jogging with someone definitely is kinda sexy lmfao. I’m just glad she got me off my ass and exercised this week, because I’ve been slacking. I’m stuck at 165 because I keep eating and drinking too much. Apparently it’s not hurting me much though ;)

But yeah still a good date though. Excited to see what’s to come!

Also it was a pleasure seeing all the cute JKCF people. I almost wish I could tell them the weird shit I’m into now. Some of the ladies who work for them have known me since I was in like 8th grade. Pretty fucking wild. 

How things change. 

So BOOM! here I am, all caught up. Eventually I’ll post some goofy stories from Hawaii, but that’s not gonna be too hard or long. hehehe Seems like things are just gonna keep being crazy for me though, so maybe I’ll blog more frequently so I don’t really fall behind as much.

Though Weilin’s really vested in me trying to work for Google, so that’s a project I have to actually do some work on. And there’s a handful of work assignments that I’ve been putting off for the last month and a half to finish this project lolol.

So maybe I take another month break and catch back up? We’ll see. Just know that things have never been better.

I am slightly in debt from drinking too much and fixing my car and getting a brand new phone and buying too many clothes and sex toys. But it’s hella manageable. Really the only reason I’m a Little behind is because I’ve been pressured to take some days off work to use up my PTO so I haven’t been seeing as many patients. Which also means spending a little more. And I’ve had a lot of no shows. So it’s no big deal. I’m making so much more money now I don’t even need to worry about it, it’ll sort itself out over time. Feels so fucking good man. 

We’ll see about my goal weight. I would like to crush this last 10-15 pounds and get rid of the tummy and maybe even get a six pack on. That’d be dope. Kind of a goal by next lake week.

Last I wanted to talk about how I talked to my dad before slosh on monday. He asked about my facebook post so I talked about how I came out as bi and he wanted to tell me that he supported me and wanted me to be happy no matter what. I love him so fucking much lol he had this little anecdote about how he had a trans mtf mechanic and he was just like “well you’re still gonna work on my motorcycle, right? Then you’re all good by me.” He also told me the BDSM polyamory stuff I’m getting into is wild and that I’ve officially one upped him on that. SO BOOYAAAAAAAAAAA WE’RE IN THERE, FAM. <3 love ya daddy-o

So I’m. Fucking. Goooood.

Love you guys <3

[pengirwinthepenguin-blog]

Gone- Part 1

Summary-  You are living your life like any other crazy cat lady- that’s only 20, might I add-,  living with only you and your three kittens. And, one day, you find out you are of an importance in this world and the next, so you are taken.

Word Count- 2015

Warnings- Cursing, and lots and lots of cats

A/n- This is my second story! I plan on writing more often, but for now I’ll be writing every few days. And, as always, feedback is welcome! And, also as always, thanks to my friends Daisy and Jessie for helping me out on my stories!

Another A/n- By the way, when facetiming in the story, you are always italics and the other person is always bold.

I love my life, for the most part. I live by a strict daily schedule, where I wake up and start the day by feeding my cats Loki, Picasso, and Angel. I then feed myself breakfast, which usually consists of 2 scrambled eggs, 2 pieces of bacon, and 1 piece of buttered toast, coffee and orange juice. Then I shower, get ready, and all that jazz. Then I just go to work at my stupid computer job.

It is a normal Monday morning. I get up at 8:30 and stretch, yawning, and I blink the sleep out of my eyes. I rub Picasso’s belly and scratch Angel’s ears. Loki is slumped on the bottom of my bed, and he’s just snoozing. Typical Loki.

I get up and feed the cats breakfast and grab my phone from the nightstand by my bed. I turn it on, and swipe the screen to read the messages I’ve gotten.

I only have a few, like normal. The first one is from my boss, Jacob. I open the message from him and read,

“hey Y/n. there is no work today due to the huge amount of snow on the roads. take the day off! 😀”

I smile at the message, as I get to spend some time alone, not working at my computer. The next message is from my boyfriend, Sam (wink wink nudge nudge elbow elbow), and his says,

“hey babe! i was going to come over today, but dean’s impala is covered in snow! maybe we can facetime later? have a great day! love youuuu ❤❤.”

He’s such a cheesy man, that’s why I love him. Then I have the usual girl notifications. Tumblr, Instagram, the norm.

I lock my phone and make my breakfast for the day. No need to go into detail here, so next I do what’s next in my perfectly timed schedule. 9:30, right on time. Next, I have a 15 minute shower. Again, no need for details. Then, at 9:45, I get dressed, brush my teeth, and do my hair. I usually keep my hair down and straighten it, unless going out on a date with Sam, so that’s all I did today.

At 10:05, I write one of my multiple stories. I mostly have Sam and Dean tell me the details of their hunt, then I make a story off of it. It’s usually just them dressing up as FBI agents then saving the day. But, there’s just some sort of satisfaction in seeing that I know how to write.

Then, at 11:00, I usually go for a walk. But today, as there is nowhere to walk, I just stay inside and read a book. Today, I am reading “The Great Gatsby,” a classic story. I read that until 11:30, though it was had to put down, as Sam is facetiming me.

Hey babe!

Hi, whatcha’ doin?

Nothing, I was reading The Great Gatsby.

Oh. That’s cool.

Yeah. So, what are you doing?

Nothing really, just researching a case. I think it’s a wendigo.

Nice. Tell me the story when you get back?

Of course!

Then we just went on, talking about life and jobs and everything. We made arrangements to go the the movies the next day, assuming the roads were same enough to drive on.

What movie? I like horror films.!

Maybe. I was thinking more like the new one Split, but I guess that IS horror. Whaddya say?

Yeah! I’ve wanted to see that one for a while now!! Thanks Sammy!! <3

Uh huh. Let me get the tickets this afternoon.

Ok! Love you, I gotta go. See ya!!

Bye hun! Can’t wait for tomorrow :D

I pressed the “end message” button on the screen and go on with my day. 12:30, I dial my favorite delivery sushi resturaunt’s number. I tell them that they need to be here in less than 20 minutes, but they know me by now. They know when and how I like my food. But, again, I don’t need to go into detail.

You might be asking yourself, now why am I describing this? It’s because, on this very Monday, I was kidnapped.

I don’t enjoy reliving the torture, but just so we can have it on record, I will. As you know, I ordered sushi. When the ‘delivery man’ arrived, he didn’t have a car. Or sushi. Or a uniform on. I didn’t have any time to react, when the man grasped my arm, and teleported us to some sort of dungeon.

“Please, I don’t have anything! I live with my cats and my schedule! I don’t own anything special, I don’t-” I plead. The man in the suit places a silver blade onto my lips, telling me to shut the fuck up. I close my mouth, not wanting to get hurt.

“Do you know why you are here?” the man says in an extremely serious tone- almost dangerous. I shake my head no, not wanting to anger him. He nods back to me.

“Are you a Christian?” he pesters on, continuing to interrogate me. I, again, shake my head. He looks at me, then at the guards at the metal door. He gives them a simple nod, and they rush out.

“Now that we’re alone,” he states, “let’s get straight to the point. You are a prophet, okay? And, you are going to read this stone,” he says, handing me a stone with Japanese-looking text carved into it, “or you will be slowly stabbed. Get it?” he finishes. I nod, feeling a tear stream down my face.

Then, as I try to decipher the unreadable text on the stone, my eyes begin to blur. I start to recognize the strange text. It was now that I am about to start reading, when this man digs the blade into my skin.

I cry out in pain, a large wound now directly over my heart.

“I can go deeper. Now read,” he demands. I groan, nodding along with the throbbing of the pain.  I go back to the stone, my eyes becoming shaky again. I begin to read the weird text again, weighing my options and at the same time trying to decide if I should help this man or not. If I don’t, I’ll just have to fake the writing. If I do help him, I’ll have to read what’s on there. But what if he kills me afterward? I don’t know what to do.

I decide to take my chances and try to read it. “C-Cut off the he-head, a-and the body will flou-flounder. Waste not th-thy time nor thy br-breath on the Levi-athan herd? What’s a Levi-athen?” I say, stuttering on the words on the tablet. I couldn’t see anything, my eyes were too cloudy and blurred. I try to blink my eyes clear, but I guess I took too long.

Another wound. This time, straight through my thigh. I shutter from the horrific pain in my upper leg.

“Y/n, why’d you leave me on such short notice?” the man says. I shake my head, waking myself up. I blink a few times and get back to the tablet.

“I-I can’t r-really s-see. M-my eyes hurt,” I say quietly. He nods, taking the tablet from my hands.

“Alright, then you get some rest. I’ll see you when you’re done,” he says, disappearing into mid-air.

I gasp. My eyes are still blurry, but this time it’s from the pain and shock of seeing my own body covered in crimson blood. My breathing comes short and ragged, and when I can breathe, it’s HARDLY. I go over to the small, hard, rock bed they laid out. He said he’d be back, so I’m just going to do what he says, and sleep.

When I wake up, I’m already in the chair, tablet in my lap. I feel a tingling feeling on my left, and when I touch there, I feel nothing. The left side of my head HAS NO EAR. Panic overtakes my body, and I begin to cry. No breathing. Just crying.

“Wh-wh-what?” is all I can stutter out. The man just shrugs, a bloody towel in his hand.

“Read,” he demands.

I take a deep, shuddering breath. I pick up the tablet, let my eyes adjust, and begin to translate. “Point t-thy blade at the h-heart of their master, f-f-for from him s-springs all their m-messages.”

I turn to the man, who nods. “Good. Keep going.”

“I- I don’t think I can.”

He raises his blade threateningly. My heart jolts and I turn back to the stone.

“L-Leviathan c-cannot be slain b-cut by the bone of a r-righteous mortal, washed in the t-three b-bloods of the f-f-fallen: a fallen angel, the ruler of fallen h-humanity, and the father of the fallen b-b-beasts.”

Everything dims. I collapse onto the ground. I hear a large crrrrackkkk of my head hitting the floor, then me fading away.

I wake up. I don’t know how long it’s been, but I feel fully energized. A man in a long trench coat is standing by me. My first thought is Wow, he’s hot, and I immediately feel bad for thinking it.

“Do you know your name?” he asks, not as demanding as the other guy. I just– wait. What’s my name? I shake my head no.

Shit. Shit. Shit, I think. This hot dude is standing right next to me and I’m acting totally helpless and stupid.

“Well, don’t worry. I’m friends with your boyfriend, Sam Winchester. I’m Castiel, an Angel of the Lord,” he states simply. I nod, even though I don’t understand a word he says.

Seriously. Sam Winchester. What the hell? I have no fucking clue who he is. My boyfriend? I don’t have one. I mean… Do I? I have no idea. But seriously, who did this guy think he was? A, what, Angel of the Lord?? Damn, that sounds stupid. And telling my who my boyfriend is. I don’t know, but I don’t think people are supposed to do that. I choose my own boyfriends. And.. Angels.

“You don’t believe me, do you?” the “angel” says.

I look at him cautiously.

“You th-thin- OW!” I try to speak, but my head pounds instead. He picks me up, bridal style, and hands me to a man with long hair.

“Y/n, you’re okay!” he cries. I scurry away, falling on the floor again. Sharp pain rips through my thigh and chest, where the first man stabbed me (twice). But I continue to run-scoot- away. I scoot until I hit Castiel’s legs.

He reaches his arms down to me to help pick me up, and I hesitantly take them. They are surprisingly soft and warm, and I can’t resist holding on to them for a few moments after he’s lifted me up.

He raises his eyebrows. “Um…..”

I take my hands back quickly.  I go back on the floor, where I feel at least a bit safer.

“I have no idea who the FUCK you people are, but I’m only g-going to ask once. Stay. The fuck. Away. I’m not looking for any trouble, so I advise you to get away.” I stated. I tried to stand to stand my ground, but I just stumbled back down.

To Be Continued…

[ylla]

This Must Be The Place - Chapter 3

Series: JJBA Characters: Okuyasu Nijimura, Josuke Higashikata Pairing: josuyasu Tags: modern au, underage drinking, vomiting mentions, background ocs, tomoko and okuyasu have a mother/son moment and i am here for it Rating: M AO3 link

***WARNING*** THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS VOMITING MENTIONS FROM OVERZEALOUS UNDERAGE DRINKING AND HANGOVERS ***WARNING***

i’m suffering through some kind of hell virus and i cant sleep, so i revved my engine and plucked this chapter right out of my ass. there are meme references throughout this entire thing, because i am tired and live to shitpost, and you get a kissaroo from me to you if you can find them all. hopefully this makes sense to everyone, and not just to my fever-addled mind.

knowing my dumb ass, the next chapter will be up soonish because i’m too ill to do anything else other than write ε-(≖д≖﹆)

Death was something Okuyasu never purposefully sought, despite living life like he had single-minded determination to see what all the fuss was about the afterlife. There had always been a strong, primal urge to survive, to live, to spite the overwhelming odds that had been stacked against him since he was so very young. Like hell he was going to just die. He had responsibilities: a dad to look after, friends to back up, a boyfriend to care for. He had shit to do; he couldn’t just die young and leave a hole in the heart of so many people.

Okuyasu wasn’t smart, but he knew how to keep himself safe. Never mix ammonia with bleach, always wear a helmet, gloves, jacket, and proper shoes when riding a motorcycle, never grab the muffler of an overheated lawn mower in the middle of a heatwave in July after it had been running for two hours.

And never, ever, lie to Tomoko “Taker of No Shit” Higashikata.

When he woke up the Sunday after the party, Okuyasu was sure he had somehow died and was now in the 8th circle of hell. He had never drank so much in all his life. He had never been so fucked up in all his life. He had no recollection of what happened after they got to the party. Everything was an assault to his senses; the tiniest amount of light and sound made his head throb, his eyes shriek, and his guts roil like snakes had manifested inside his body. He attempted to sit up, but it made his head spin so badly, he immediately started vomiting. Thank god a previously unnoticed bucket was thrust in front of him, catching what was a small amount of bile and water. “He lives,” said whatever was holding the bucket.

Okuyasu looked up to find Josuke standing in front of him, looking exactly like how he felt. You look terrible is what he wanted to say. “Grugh” is what came out instead.

“You remember last night?”

“No,” Oku moaned, settling back down, “Th’ fuck happened?”

“A lot of bullshit.”

“Oh god…what happened?”

Josuke put the puke bucket down and sat on the edge of the bed, “You won’t like it.”

Here was the evening from Josuke’s perspective, though he was a little fuzzy on all of the details.

After bidding goodnight to Tomoko, they waited until it was dark before sneaking out of Oku’s house and hoofing it to the party. Josuke was dressed to the nines as usual, while Okuyasu was wearing something more understated, but it worked for him.

The house (which looked massive) was located in a more secluded part of Morioh, clearly chosen to enable underage tomfoolery. There were still a few neighbors around who probably heard the music and saw kids going in. This looked like it was a mistake, but hey, why not enjoy it while you can?

Surprisingly, the front door was manned by no one other than Tamami, who was holding a coffee can that was half-full with deposited yen; there was a door charge they hadn’t been aware of. Apparently, this was Tamami’s parent’s house, and he decided that throwing a party while they were away on a trip would be a great way to make some extra cash. Josuke remarked that he respected the hustle, before he elbowed Tamami in the ribs hard while reminding him that they were Koichi’s Best Fuckin’ Bros, so why not cut them a little slack?? You know, for Koichi?

Both boys got a free pass; they stepped into the living room where the party was obviously already underway. Red solo cups filled with some unidentified liquid was thrust into their hands, which they immediately tried. It tasted like window cleaner mixed with Gatorade, and it was disgusting, but they kept drinking to keep up appearances. They watched a pack of drunk teenagers grind on the makeshift dance floor, music blaring loudly, while a lively game of beer pong took place in the kitchen.

They found Oku’s Home Economics buddies in a corner; Yukie looked like she was having the time of her life, while Hitomi was passively sipping a beer, and Ritsu was flushed, looking like she was waiting for the earth to swallow her up. With a nudge, Hitomi pointed to the far corner, where Yuuya was standing with his fangirls, arm around a guy who looked just like him minus the stupid chin tattoo. Hachiro was his name; apparently, he was a junior, Yuuya’s younger half-brother, acted nothing like him, and Ritsu had it bad for him. The four of them tried to needle Ritsu into approaching him, but she had steadfastly refused, clutching her cup like it was a lifeline.

Josuke, a man of action, took it upon himself to walk right up to Yuuya and suggested he get a game of truth or dare going. Yuuya flickered eyes between Josuke and the corner from whence he came, before managing to shout over the noise that if anyone was interested in playing truth or dare, to follow him to the basement. Some people left the dance floor and followed, while Hitomi and Yukie hoisted up Ritsu, who had become rooted to the floor, and carried her downstairs.

Okuyasu and Josuke high-fived; Josuke then tried dragging Oku to the dance floor, but he resisted, saying he was too damn sober to make a fool of himself. So beer pong it was. After watching a few games (and guffawing when Hazamada tried to kiss some girl, but got a face full of vodka instead), they got to play. To the shock of everyone, Okuyasu was amazing while Josuke sucked absolute ass, almost tanking their chances at winning with sheer ineptitude. The pressure was too much! The alcohol was fucking up his reaction time! He kept getting teased, which made him pout, but Okuyasu kissed him on the mouth, then proceeded to shoot his way to victory repeatedly.

After what was probably 3 or 4 rounds, they were both three sheets to the wind. Are you feeling it now, Mr. Nijimura? Josuke purred in his ear, before dragging him to the dance floor. If either of them had been remotely sober, they would have never in a million years waltzed into the middle of a dance floor and dirty dance in front of most of their peers. But there they were, drunk as shit, with Josuke grinding his ass into Okuyasu. It was a good thing that everyone around them was just as inebriated, and too interested in dancing up on their partners to notice.

They managed to get through a few songs before they stumbled to the bathroom to have a drunk makeout session. In the few months they had been dating, they hadn’t gotten much farther than sloppy kisses with lots of tongue, but with the ferocity they had attacked each other’s lips and neck, things might have gone way further if they hadn’t been interrupted by someone barging into the bathroom and slurring, “GOTTA SHIT” before they pulled down their pants and lit that tiny bathroom up.

Boners effectively killed, they wandered downstairs to see how the truth or dare game was going. The first thing they saw was Ritsu sitting in the lap of Yuuya’s brother, making out with him. Hitomi helpfully informed Josuke and Okuyasu that Hachiro had just been dared by his older brother to kiss the prettiest girl in the room, and well. Hitomi had just gestured at the two.

Since everyone had already gone once, Yuuya picked Okuyasu next, taking his brother’s turn since he was busy. He tossed the teenager a half-pint of something called Everclear and told him to chug as much has he could. Never one to back down from a challenge, Okuyasu started guzzling it down like he had been stranded in the desert and this was the first drink he’d seen in months. He got to name on the label before he replaced the cap to the sound of resounding cheers, swayed for a few seconds, and then promptly stumbled over to a laundry basket to retch.

As Oku cleared the contents of his stomach, his face the color of a sickeningly combo of grey and green, someone pounded down the stairs to holler “IT’S THE COPS, SCATTER.”

This is where Josuke’s memory gets a little fuzzy. The next thing he remembers is him and Yuuya booked it across the backyard, half-dragging, half-carrying Okuyasu, with Hachiro carrying Ritsu. Yuuya told his girls to go ahead without him, and they took off on their bikes, carting off Yukie, Hitomi, and someone who was probably Hazamada. Then he remembers jumping into what appeared to be an ancient, black SUV and Yuuya peeling out of Tamami’s house at an excessive speed. Okuyasu started puking again, and it took the combined effort of Hachiro and Josuke to keep it from spilling out a plastic bag Hachiro grabbed from the trunk.

Yuuya dropped Josuke and Okuyasu off first; Hachiro helped get Oku out of the car and up onto the porch of—

“Wait wait wait, hold on.” Okuyasu rubbed his face, trying to process everything Josuke was telling him. “You mean to tell me that I got a debt I gotta repay to Yuuya??”

Josuke grimaced, “We both do, because he saved our asses. Kinda.”

“What do you mean ‘kinda’?” Okuyasu was already squinting because he was trying to avoid looking into any light source, but he squinted so much that his eyes were basically closed.

“I, uh—“

“Dude,” he loved Josuke with every part of him, but he was nauseous, felt like absolute garbage, and wanted to just curl up and stop existing, so he was a little bit testy, “You gotta just fuckin’ tell me. You know I ain’t that smart to begin with, but right now my brain feels like someone rubbed a bunch of spicy shit on it, so I ain’t thinking that clearly. Tell me.”

Typically, Josuke would bark something snotty, but instead, he didn’t speak, just swallowed instead and turned around so Oku couldn’t see his face.

“What?? Fuckin’ tell me dude! Did Yuuya’s bro see my dad when he helped you carry me in?? Did dad get hurt???” He tried to sit up, but Josuke put a hand on his chest to keep him down, still not looking at him.

“We…we didn’t go back to your house…”

Okuyasu was thunderstruck for a few minutes. He looked around, bewildered, “Where the fuck are we—“ It was in that exact moment that Oku realized what room he was in. It wasn’t his bedroom. The soft yellow walls and band posters were not his. He slowly realized the implications. They were in Josuke’s room. In his house. Where Tomoko “Not My Mom But Kinda Is” Higashikata lived.

“Oh shit,” he whispered, “oh, holy shit.”

Josuke rubbed his face, then rested his head in his hands, “You were—You scared the shit out of me. You kept puking, and you weren’t like—you weren’t responsive, so I had Yuuya take us to my house. And I got mom up—“

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god,” Okuyasu was on the verge of panicking, “Josuke, what the fuck??”

“I was drunk! And scared something was really wrong! I had to wake her up!!” Josuke turned towards him, his temper flaring, “What the fuck was I supposed to do??? Let you possibly d—“ He stopped short, trying to swallow down whatever he was about to say. Taking a minute, Josuke sighed, “It doesn’t matter. Mom’s pissed and our asses are grass, dude.”

“That’s an understatement.”

Okuyasu didn’t need to look in the doorway to know Tomoko was standing there with her hands on her hips, looking fierce and ready to string them both up. He could feel anger radiating off of her in waves.

Josuke, who had always been mouthy, had always bucked under Tomoko’s rules, went completely silent and still, staring at his hands. The fact that Josuke couldn’t contradict her, that he could only hang his head in shame, made Okuyasu realize just exactly how in trouble they were. They fucked up. Big time.

“You know, I figured something was wrong when Josuke buttered me up all evening. Never in my life would I guess that you two would go out to some stranger’s house—“

Josuke couldn’t help himself, “Actually, we know Tam—“

“GO TO SOME STRANGER’S HOUSE. AND GET SO SHITFACED THAT ONE OF YOU DAMN NEAR HAS ALCOHOL POISONING??”

Okuyasu visibly flinched at her shouting, feeling tears prick the back of his eyes.

“Mom—“

“I’m not stupid, Josuke, which apparently you seem to assume. I don’t care that you two go over to Okuyasu’s house and drink beers or smoke cigarettes, because I know you’re at least safer there than out in some strange place. You LIED to me, and damn near got ARRESTED—“

“Listen—“

“And Okuyasu here REEKS of grain alcohol and probably should be in the hospital right now for alcohol poisoning! What the hell is wrong with you two???”

Josuke sighed, waiting for it to be over. Oku was barely holding back sobs, while tears rolled down his face.

“How dumb can you boys be?? You’ve taken years off of my life, I think I sprouted more wrinkles and grey hairs in one night than I have in the past 37 years.”

“I’m sorry, mom” Josuke mumbled.

“I’m sorry, Ms. H” Okuyasu choked out. Josuke reached behind him and laced their fingers together, giving a reassuring squeeze.

Tomoko sighed, “You know, honestly? I’m not even mad at you, Okuyasu, I’m just disappointed. I expect this kind of stupidity from Josuke, but not from you.”

It was like a knife in the gut. He would’ve taken a punch to the face from her better.

“After you’re well enough, we’re gonna go over to your house and I’m going to speak to your father—“

The wail he had been suppressing ripped out of him, “No no no no no, please no, Ms. H, I’m beggin’ ya—“ He started to get up, to sit on his knees in front of her and beg her to do literally anything else, when his stomach churned again and he vomits

All over Josuke’s legs.

Josuke, a saint with a pompadour (though right now it’s just a stringy mess), bit his lip to prevent himself from shrieking and just stiffly strong-armed the puke bucket in front of Okuyasu, as he sobbed and threw up more. It was a complete disaster.

“Oku, I have to,” Tomoko sounded significantly less angry, but just as firm, “I know he’s sick, but—“

“You don’t understand,” Okuyasu managed to say, “He won’t understand a thing you tell ‘em.” Oku flopped back down, exhausted and crying, “He doesn’t even know who I am.” Feeling ashamed, he flung an arm over his face, wishing The Hand could just scrap him away until nothing was left.

He had never told Tomoko anything about his dad. She never pushed the matter, not wanting to upset Okuyasu by making him talk about it, which he had been grateful for. Oku had sworn Josuke to secrecy that he would never tell her, but it’s not like he had to. Josuke couldn’t exactly explain that Oku’s father became an invincible booger man because an immortal vampire that had been plaguing the Joestar family for 100 years had implanted some kind of mind control thing that went crazy after said immortal vampire was killed.

The only things Tomoko was told was that his mom had died when he was young, his father fell very ill shortly aftewards, his brother was murdered in front of him, and that this boy’s life had been nothing but an uphill battle from day 1. He had no one, save for the few people he had met in Morioh.

“Josuke, go get cleaned up.”

When Josuke didn’t move or speak, Oku figured they were making faces at each other, silently communicating on how to approach what the hell this mess was. “Aight,” was Josuke’s response. He leaned back and planted a small kiss on the part of Oku’s face that wasn’t covered up; squeezing his hand one more time before gingerly getting up off the bed, stripping away his pajama pants, and heading to the bathroom.

Tomoko took his spot on the bed, gently moving the arm covering his face, and wiped his tears away. All this did was cause them to fall harder, but she kept at it. Oku couldn’t bear to look her in the face. Some part of him wondered if this is what having a mom was like. It took Oku a bit to calm down, “Sorry,” was all he could manage to say.

“Don’t apologize. I didn’t mean to get so worked up. I just…I worry. That’s all.”

He closed his eyes when the hand went from his face to his hair. He didn’t deserve any of this sweetness, after had just scared her half to death. There was a silence hanging in the air, and Oku knew she was gonna ask—

“Is your father that sick? What’s wrong with him, exactly?”

And there it is. He was terrible at lying to her, but maybe he could get away with a lie by omission.

“Me and Keicho never found out what’s exactly wrong with ‘em. Whatever it is, it ruined his brain, like his memories are kinda there, but,” Oku swallowed, “He can’t speak or really do for himself. I dunno if he recognizes me as his son, or as the guy who feeds and talks to ‘em” Tears were threatening again, but he muscled through it. She deserved to at least know some things. “It uh, changed his appearance too. A lot. It can be weird to see…”

He fell silent after that, not sure what else to say. “I’m sorry, honey,” Tomoko said thickly, after a few minutes. It made Okuyasu’s chest twinge painfully. “You’ve shouldered all of this by yourself this whole time?”

“I—I mean I had Keicho, but…” there was a lump in his throat, “But it’s jus’ me now, I guess.”

She sniffed, sounding so heartbroken, “You know you’re not alone, right? You’ve got me, and Josuke, and a lot of other people who love and care about you.”

“I know.”

“And I love you very much, even if I’m shouty sometimes.”

“I know. And I love you too, Ms. H,” he wiped his eyes. Finally, Okuyasu got the courage to look her in the face. Thankfully, she hadn’t been crying, but her eyes were shiny with tears. “Um…can I have a hug?”

She chuckled, “You know you don’t have to ask,” and helped him sit up a little so she could give her Mom-Hugs-Make-It-Better hug, rubbing his back before giving him a Mom Smooch on the cheek.

“Thanks.”

“Feeling better?”

“Yeah, a little.”

“Good,” she got up and looked him. Hands were firmly placed on her hips, but she didn’t look pissed or upset anymore, “You’re grounded until further notice.”

“Uh—“

“Since your dad is too sick, I will hand out your punishment. You can still come over and see Josuke, if only because I want to make sure you’re following the rules. No videogames, internet unless it’s for homework, or tv. Both you and that son of mine will be doing nothing but chores, homework, and studying. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Alright,” she ruffled his hair affectionately, “Now go get Josuke out of the bathroom, and take a shower. I’ll change your sheets, they smell like rubbing alcohol and regret.”

It took a lot of effort, but Oku managed to shamble out of Josuke’s room and toward the bathroom. The bathroom door was comfortable as he leaned against it, “Jooosuke, open up.”

The door unlocked, Okuyasu pushed it open and stumbled in. Josuke was wearing only his underwear, hair wet and still unstyled. He leaned against the mirror over the sink, face smooshed, making some kind of walrus groan, “I think I’m dying.”

A glance in the mirror told Oku that he looked like the dead reanimated, “I already look like a damn zombie.” He shuffled to Josuke and put his head on his shoulder, “I’m sorry about being a fuckin’ mess, and making you worry, and puking on you—“

Josuke turned around and pulled Okuyasu close, giving him a kiss on his greasy noggin, “S’fine, don’t worry about it. Looks like we’re gonna be grounded forever though.”

“You heard all that?”

“Nah, jus’ figured she’d do that.”

They held each other for a little bit, the silence comfortable before Josuke pulled away, face scrunched up for effect, “I love you, sunshine, but you need to shower. You smell funky.”

“Thanks asshole, way to ruin the moment,” he jabbed Josuke in the side, “Love you—“ That’s when he noticed the dark purple hickies covering Josuke’s neck. “WHAT THE FUCK??” he hissed, turning Josuke’s head to the side to get a good look at them. Oh god, Tomoko has seen what he has done to her son.

“Chill out, dude, it’s not a big deal—“

“Not a big deal?? Look at you!!”

Josuke turned his head back towards Okuyasu, a big toothy grin on his face, “I see ‘em, babe.”

A hint of pink colored Okuyasu’s cheeks, “So can everyone else!”

“Let ‘em,” he leaned over and gave Oku a sweet kiss on the cheek before leaning over in to whisper in his ear, “’Sides, I love ‘em.” Josuke straightened up with a wink, and a not-so-subtle lip lick. Which would have been incredibly sexy if he didn’t turn and immediately smack his face into the bathroom door when trying to leave. After a beat, he muttered “You take this to the grave,” before grabbing his reddening face while skedaddling out of the room.

Okuyasu wouldn’t tell a soul anyways. He wanted to be the only one who got to see Josuke in his true form: a complete and utter dork.

Later on, after Josuke gets his hair French braided, and Oku no longer smelled like the world’s grossest bar and checked on his dad, they laid in Josuke’s bed and watched movies together on his laptop. Tomoko, in her infinite graciousness, gave them a reprieve from being grounded until they felt better.

Okuyasu dozed on and off with his face buried into Josuke’s shoulder, still feeling like shit and flinching in the light of day. At one point, he woke up to Josuke very gently shaking him, “Hey, I gotta question.”

“Mm.”

“You’re staying the night, right?”

“Mhm.”

Josuke kissed the side of his head, “Good shit.” Oku was drifting back off to sleep when he was shaken again, “Do you feel bad about leaving those hickies?”

He cracked open an eye, wishing that his boyfriend would just wait to ask him later, when he didn’t feel like death. However, Josuke was looking at him with those big blue eyes that were full of concern, and he couldn’t help but answer. “Kinda…? I mean,” his voice was slightly slurred from sleep, “I liked leavin’ ‘em, a-and seein’ ‘em, but they’re just kinda, uh, big. So I’m just worried they hurt, ‘cause I don’t wanna hurt ya.”

Josuke’s face just melted into this sappy smile, and Oku’s heart did that stuttering thing again, “Aww, you big softie.” Oku grumbled a little at being called a softie, but couldn’t keep himself from giggling as his face got peppered with kisses. “They’re small compared to the giant ones I left on you—“

“You gave me some?? What the hell, did you heal them??”

“Well yeah, they turned the entire left side of your neck this gross shade of yellow and purple.”

“Damn, babe. Musta been those big lips—“

"Fuck you, dickhead—“

“Did they look like that bruise ya got on your forehead from hittin’ ya face on the door earlier?”

His boyfriend went from adorable pouting at the lip comment to horrified, “DID IT LEAVE A BRUISE?” He made to get up, but Oku just held him down.

“It’s small and you can barely see it unless someone is right up on ya, calm your ass down!” Josuke whined, but Oku placed a kiss on his forehead, “That better?”

“No…”

Oku gave him a sweet kiss on his lips, ears pink, speaking quietly, "I-I love your lips, they’re really soft…” He kissed Josuke again, “Better now?”

“…Yes.”

Josuke whipped out his phone and opened up the camera to check his face out. There was some slight discoloration on his forehead, and he grunted irritably. Then he switched to snapchat, “Oku, smile.”

“Hell no, don’t take a picture of me. I look like hot vomit,”

“No you don’t, you’re adorable.” Josuke made a kissy face and took his free hand to smoosh Oku’s lips to make a kissy face. After an agonizing few seconds of being subjected to selfies, Josuke finally got one he deemed good enough. “See! You’re so cute, sunshine.”

The picture was cute. Oku hated how it made his heart feel like it was gonna explode, but didn’t try to wrestle the phone out of Josuke’s iron-like grip to delete it and keep taking more. “…Send that to me.”

“New wallpaper?” Josuke saved it to his phone before adding a caption that said ‘He lives! So handsome ♡ ♡ ♡’

“Maybe. Wanna tussle over it?”

“Rather not have you puke on me again.” Josuke posted it to his Story and sent it to a few people on his snapchat friends list, “Also, you need to shave.”

“Ain’t diggin’ how rugged my face feels?”

Josuke snorted, “It’s like touching a cactus.”

Okuyasu rolled on top of Josuke and started rubbing his face against Josuke’s like a cat.

“AGH—YOU BASTARD, STOP!!!”

He was cackling, but all the motion was making his stomach feel queasy again. After his laughter calmed down, Okuyasu rested his forehead against Josuke’s, “Hi.”

“Hey.”

Oku swallowed, “Uhm, about the hickie stuff earlier…”

Josuke arched an eyebrow, “What about it?”

“If—if you wanted to, you could…gimme some little ones. If you wanna, that is—“

It took him a few seconds to realize that Josuke had flipped him and straddled him before he even finished his thought.

“Don’t mind if I do.”

“So, you show up to your boyfriend’s house, drunk as a skunk,” Hitomi asked carefully, “and his mom…grounded you?”

“Y-yeah. Ms. H can be a really scary lady.”

Okuyasu was still dehydrated on Monday, so he didn’t go to school until the next day (with some little love bites on his neck). Talk about the party had mostly died down, but he did learn that Tamami only ended up with a hefty ticket, everyone who was picked up by the cops were let go of, and Hachiro had been avoiding Ritsu like she had tuberculosis.

“I’m such a fool!!!” she wailed, flinging herself dramatically over the counter. Yukie, with a good sense of timing, managed to catch her ponytail before it went flying into her bowl of batter. “Why won’t he talk to me???”

“Maybe he’s shy…?” Okuyasu supplied.

“He wasn’t shy when he had his tongue down my throat and his hand on my butt!!” Other students in the class swiveled around to stare at them.

“Ritsu, don’t holler that!” Yukie hissed.

“Oh my god,” Hitomi muttered under her breath, trying to avoid everyone’s eyes.

“Okuyasu,” Ritsu clung to him, “You got a man. How did you catch him??”

“I uh…what?”

“How did you confess your ~undying~ love to Josuke??”

He was living in a living nightmare, “Uhm, Josuke…confessed to me…actually…”

A beat passed before Ritsu dramatically threw herself onto the counter again, baying like a wounded dog.

“Ritsu, for—“ Yukie picked her up by her shoulders and started shaking her, “Calm down!! You’re making a scene!!”

Hitomi had sunk down to the floor, clearly wishing that she could just keep sinking until she hit the core of the earth. Oku was tempted to follow her, but Ritsu shrugged off Yukie to grab him again, “Then, how did Josuke confess to you??”

Oku managed to escape her grip, “We were sittin’ on my back porch lookin’ at the stars after a big storm knocked out the power,” Okuyasu realized his face was turning scarlet, so he started working on his cookie dough, “We were like drinkin’ and holdin’ hands, and he’s like ‘Dude I’m in love with someone’. I thought it had to be literally anyone other than me, and I was really upset, but then he kissed me. A-and then told me I looked like the sun when I smiled, which was really smooth, so I gotta give him that. So I told him I loved him too, and then, uh, he asked me out and here we are” he finished lamely.

The girls were awfully silent. When he raised his head to see what they were doing, he was alarmed to find all three of them (Hitomi had emerged from her spot on the floor) looking at him with tears in their eyes.

“THAT’S SO SWEET—“

“That was pretty smooth on Josuke’s part—“

“IS THAT WHY HE CALLS YOU SUNSHINE??”

“I—I think so?” Oku stammered, “Josuke’s good at all this romance stuff, you should ask him for advice. All I’m good for is cooking.”

Hitomi looked at her runny cookie dough, compared it to Oku’s nice, chunky mix, and sniffed, “If we’re gonna start asking for food advice, what kind of wizardry bullshit do you pull to get this consistency?”

Lunch was a fairly quiet affair, Ritsu opting to just grill Josuke over snapchat instead of hounding him in person. Which was good, since Josuke still hadn’t shown up at the usual spot, so it was just Okuyasu and Koichi.

“Man, since you got Class Rep, you’ve been too busy, dude.” Okuyasu remarked.

Koichi shrugged, “Looks good on college applications, and it’s not so bad. I could think of worse things to be doing.” He took a bite out of a little custard tart his mother packed in his lunch, “Heard about the party from Tamami. Sounds like it been a lot of fun.”

Oku winced, feeling bad that they didn’t invite Koichi, “It was until I got sick… sorry we didn’t extend an invite to you, dude.”

With a smile, Koichi waved him down, “I wouldn’t have gone anyways, I had that meeting. Also, Tamami had already invited me, but I told him I couldn’t. It’s fine! I promise. Anyways, how’s you and Josuke doing?”

So Okuyasu started babbling about how great Josuke was, which somehow lead into the story about the guy who started uncontrollably shitting with them in the room (Koichi looked sickened), when the devil himself waltzed up to them, looking pensive.

“Hey Josuke—“ Koichi greeted, his smile falling slightly when he saw the look on Josuke’s face, “What’s up?”

“Mom called me, and told me that she had been talking to Holly.” Two blank stares met him. “You know, Jotaro’s mom? My sister?”

“Oh shit, yeah!”

“That’s right! Mr. Jotaro said that…”

Oku’s brows furrowed, “Somethin’ the matter with that, though?”

Josuke kinda shrugged, “It’s just, weird I guess. Considering everything…” he stared at the ground for a minute before clearing his throat, “But, they’re apparently getting along and got most of the awkward stuff out of the way. Mom told me that Holly said everyone is coming in about two weeks. You guys wanna go with us when we meet them at the airport?”

“Of course!”

“Fuck yeah dude, count me in.”

A smile returned to Josuke’s face, and he nodded before plopping down beside Okuyasu to steal a kiss and some of his food.

With any luck, when they meet up with everyone again, it will be without hickie decorated necks. Okuyasu would never hear the end of it from Polnareff.