#it is 1 am and I have a migraine

[the-pjo-archive]

My thoughts on Piper McLean

Warning: This will be a lot of my personal story and a lot about me and the real world instead of Piper and fiction Also Spoilers for HoO

I have seen people hate on Piper for being a pickme, for being cringy

But my take is that she is the most real character, she is the one I can relate to the most. Rick managed to capture the experience of denying yourself who you are and the struggles of accepting yourself later.

I grew up surrounded by people who found dresses unpractical and we had a very holier than thou view of "Well I don't feel the need to wear makeup because I'm pretty the way I am" and very much thought we were better than all those "girly girls" who said literally too much and did makeovers or whatever. And now, 10 years later, I am slowly putting on makeup, in private, constantly worried I'll be bullied for it. I'll want to wear a dress and have a whole breakdown about if it's even right for me wear one.

Piper grew up trying to run away from the spotlight, she hated the camera, she hated being rich and famous, and wanted attention from her dad, so she tried to look boring and normal and messy so she could pretend to be a regular kid, so she wasn't like the ladies in hollywood always chasing after her dad with their pretty, fake smiles. Then she gets claimed by aphrodite and gets thrown in with all the fake ladies who are chasing after her father, she was repulsed by them the moment she saw them (she did change her mind when she met Mitchel and Lacey though) but not only that but she was also forced to wear makeup and have her hair up nicely. At the time she was upset about the whole situation and stressed about her dad, but if Aphrodite's blessing had happened when Piper wasn't so worked up I think she would have liked it. Because she's like me, she is drawn to art and self expression, she is drawn to true (inner) beauty, she just never got to experience it and instead was only shown the ugly sides of makeup.

Reason I went on this tangent is in chapter 22 of the Lost Hero:

"Her jeans were tattered from the fall through the roof. Her boots were splattered with melted dirty snow. She didn't know what her face looked like, but probably horrible. Why did it matter? She'd never cared about things like that before."

Now she does go on to blame Aphrodite for "messing with her thoughts" but she has always been a daughter of aphrodite, the only thing that's changed is she has been given permission to explore that part of herself.

If any of this is covered in later books then I just don't remember, I am rereading for the first time in like 5 years or longer.

[cassiefisherdrake]

Of COURSE I would be fine for a while and then get a full-blown migraine during DragonCon.

[irhabiya]

my random sleep timings and procrastination abilities need to be studied why does this work every time im scared

[ilovedthestars]

currently feeling like I’m caught in the middle of a three-way battle between my finals season workload, my personal expectations for myself and desire to make art that I’m genuinely proud of, and the physical limitations of my body which is still in spoon debt from being sick for like three weeks and then spending spring break doing makeup work. I’ve been feeling like this a lot in the last several weeks and every time I’ve managed to find a burst of energy or the willingness to cut some corners and rest or some other way to compromise, but god i am so ready to stop having to deal with all of this at once

[bellasdragons]

Sketch of my progens!

I'm "participating" in NaNoWritMo this year - by writing lore for my clan! I'm not aiming to get 50k words or a coherent original novel, but I really miss writing and my friend was considering doing nano this year, so I said I'LL DO IT TOO, but my goal is to just... write. It's gonna be lore snippets (both for my clan overall and for individual dragons), stuff for my Neopets, maybe some fanfic ideas that have been percolating - whatever comes to mind. Have some fun with it, y'know?

I already got a nice little prologue written about how Magpie (Fae, custom progen) and Veil (Mirror, random progen) meet, and gives a bit of a setting introduction. c:

[minici]

It is weird to have the overall structure of my life going really well. And also be on my 4th breakdown of the past two weeks. I keep writing dramatic things like “the beautiful structure of my life is scaffolded on my suffering” and then sighing at myself

I am very successful now. And I have loving partners. And a place to live. And medications. And friends, if I had the time to talk to them

But I am so, so exhausted due to a string of unfortunate events preventing me from having a real break for 6 months. Also the daily migraines are getting to me. This should be better in a couple weeks hopefully. At least my partners get to trade off handling the breakdowns

[ratcandy]

oh god where am i

[milkweedman]

ah, the ever-more-frequent Urge To Explode My Brain from unending migraines. a migraine that just lasts the day already sucks so bad. whole day is gone in a blur of pain and misery, right ? a migraine that lasts multiple days is sort of like if hell was real and you were in it. time has no meaning, only pain, etc.

months of migraines... with no break or end or effective treatment and also you still have to work and behave like a normal person because you cannot lie in bed for months not paying rent. well id describe it you but ive fucking lost the plot. its gone on so long and its so bad that when the migraine ISN'T at its peaking on the pain scale and making me feel like if i was hit by a truck that would be an improvement, i start to feel like my head is a vestigial organ that has been removed. cant access sensation in my head and it feels literally disconnected from my body. meanwhile the pain is still there (along with the brain fog, vertigo, nausea, etc) but it feels like its happening to somebody else.

[caramel-catss]

i played skyward sword for three hours straight just now. dizzy kirby emoji

[waugh-bao]

*

[ghostorbeeze]

Oh mein ghott!!! this bus is full of lesbianeithm!!!!

[ghosts-of-love]

i will admit it was a very up-and-down day but my favourite parts of my town's pride yesterday:

went tits/nips out for the whole day

walked 10 miles somehow???

my friend's 80 Yr old aunt joined us for a bit and complimented my outfit AND told me i've got very hairy ("you've got more hair on your belly than I've got on my head!" your honour I LOVE HER)

got lots of compliments on the patches on my sleeveless jacket

me and my friends hung out with the local cryptid (adoring) and turns out he likes us !! and we've now adopted a thirty summat creachur and might do crafts with it

me and my friend halfheartedly brought some jewellery and patches to sell at a friend's stall and actually we made a whole bunch of money!! enough to buy way more jewellery supplies for the next fundraiser!! 🩷🩷

all the free shit from stalls

chatting with some bears in leather about the old pub that's now a squat

the hilarious division of all the free condoms that had been shoved into my bag throughout the entire day ("considering I'm not actually getting any, I suppose I'll give you the lion's share 🙄" - me to my friends, while still keeping a measly 8 just to say I had some)

apparently some people came up to the stall and said that me and my friends were really cool which I wasn't there for but am choosing to believe is true!!

[sangfielle]

this is crazy ive never had to do a new pt appointment with a doctor that wasnt a million years away. they were trying to get me in the door Today. *i* had 2 be the guy to be like actually i dont have any openings for 3 weeks

[trauma-trove]

I hate that I'm held at social gunpoint to never EVER be anything but picture perfect niceness while doctors and nurses bully me and treat me like shit. It drives me insane. I tried being transparent with my last nurse about how my dietary problems, thyroid probpems, and chronic pain treatment was really going to interfere with a procedure and that I wanted to schedule it AFTER my other appointments and procedures. She told me "well, I can't do anything about that. The doctor wants it done." I tore the instructions she gave me right in front of her. They were salvageable. I could tape them together. But she looked at me like I called her a fucking slur.

"Oh but think of the doctor/nurse/receptionist you're doing that to! Every time a patient loses it, more medical practitioners leave the field!"

I.

Don't.

Care.

You're DOING this TO ME. I have the right of being the victim here. If someone is pushed and forced and coerced and bullied and assaulted enough times, they have a right to treat their offenders like shit.

I'm fucking sick of it.

[pegglefan69]

small Halloween treats for me: migraine aura but no actual migraine, previously blogged-about vampire-themed fragrance actually DOES work with my skin chemistry

[neocaridinas]

I forgot my migraine relief pills have caffeine in them .