#it has impacted my view of LiS so much that there was a good minute I forgot Kate’s last name

[chloepleasestopdying]

Ideas for an "After The Storm" game with the save bae ending?

If I had control to make ‘After the Storm’ it would probably be pretty damn close to The Girls Who Broke the World by GeneralIrritation over on AO3. It’s one of my favorite LiS fics and my favorite fic for exploring the cause of Max’s powers. I’ll expand on my reasons under the cut but if you haven’t read it and don’t want to be spoiled go read it! It’s great !!

it’s full sequel the setting HAS to be Arcadia Bay. The OG game is just too connected to the town itself to not be set there. Pulling Max and Chloe completely out of there just feels… wrong. One of the best things about LiS is that they knew how to set the vibes of all the areas so well.

‘Ah but I asked for After the Storm with Save the Bae’ yes you did anon- the game should NOT be set in the same exact timeline that the player been able to play in. This 1) keeps the game from making a single choice canon (which they’ve been trying to keep from doing) and 2) keeps the players on their toes.

In keeping with the idea of being in the same setting- the vibe has to be similar. A lot of post canon fics tend to go mores the sci-fi part because of Max’s powers (which can be pretty cool) but LiS is a mystery with some horror. Rachel’s disappearance lingers over the entire game as does Kate’s attempted suicide and Chloe’s repeated brushs with death. Just because there is a lot of cute moments and kinda cringe dialogue doesn’t mean we should forget that vibe.

I brought up The Girls Who Broke the World for a lot of reasons and one of the biggest is because it takes a very similar vibe- if not one that’s a bit more … I wouldn’t quite say mature but perhaps more adult. It’s a straight up murder mystery instead of Chloe and Max’s flat refusal of treating Rachel’s disappearance as such. There’s more death and drugs - though never anything too outrageous for the setting.

And keeping the bay also keeps the characters. LiS has GREAT characters. All the minor characters are just great. Any sequel has to at least try and bring back as many as possible and keeping the setting helps with that.

Max can’t have her powers. I love Max’s powers and I’m a HUGE fan of her keeping them post canon but her powers are op as all fuck if the game actually let you use them to the extent they should be able to.

But if I know I would want to explore the cause of her powers. Later LiS games clearly go with the theme of the characters getting them just because but that never worked with me with Max. Alex’s powers felt like a part of her, they’re something she’s been dealing with and have been growing stronger while Max’s just kinda appeared ?

So basically in TGWBTW (such a long title lol) Max doesn’t have her powers. The fic is from Chloe’s point of view and set a few years post canon with them having spilt up at some point after ‘canon’. Chloe has become something like a fixer with minor drug dealers in Arcadia Bay and gets mixed in with a murder mystery. It takes awhile for the reader to start putting together the pieces on what happened: Max used the picture to travel to the bathroom and instead of letting Chloe died Max jumped in front of the gun. Max’s powers end up not really being ‘hers’ and the last fic expands on some of the dropped hints like the Prescotts.

I think something like that- where you play as Chloe who has no memory of Hell week while Max does is really cool.



[flowercrowngods]

in which steve takes el to see her first meteor shower

Steve is pulling up at the Hopper-Byers house around ten at night, hoping that El remembers their little date. Hoping even more that the Chief will let them do this.

The door opens before Steve so much as closes his car, and a very excited teenager already runs toward him, laughing when she crashes into his chest, the impact of which makes Steve stumble back against the car.

"Good evening to you, too, you little menace." He ruffles her hair, excited to see how long it's gotten again, a mop of wild curls.

"Hi," she says into his chest, hands hooked behind his back, and they just stand there and cuddle for a minute. The night air is refreshing after the day's boiling heat, and it's good to bask for a moment.

After a moment, Hopper appears in the front door, framed by the low light coming from inside, but even in the dark, Steve thinks he can make out the expression on the Chief's face. How he tries for stern, but can't quite manage it. Not when they've all been through so much.

"Hey, kid," he says, approaching the siblings where they are still hugging. "You looking to kidnap my daughter?"

"Yes, actually," Steve grins. "Will you let me?"

Hop gives a long-suffering sigh and places a hand on Steve's shoulder. "If there's one thing I've learned, Steve, it's that I can't stop you from anything you set your mind to. So I don't think I've much of a choice in the matter, let alone a say."

El chuckles and leans up to press a little kiss to Hopper's cheek. "Thanks, dad."

"Yeah, yeah," he grumbles, and Steve snickers. "Get out of my sight, you two, but I expect to see you both at breakfast tomorrow."

"Eleven o'clock," Steve says in lieu of a groan, because he loves Sunday breakfast at the Hopper-Byers' place.

"Eight."

"Ten-thirty."

"Nine-thirty, last offer. Take it or leave it, boy."

"Deal," Steve grins, then turns back to El. "You ready to go?"

She nods. "Ready." Then turns back to Hop and gives him another kiss to the cheek and a quick hug. "Goodnight, dad."

"Have a good night, kid." As El bounds around the car to jump in on the other side, Hop turns to Steve, who's already moving in for a hug, too. "You, too. Be careful."

"Always. It's just stars, though."

"I know. Still."

"I know."

It's good. The hug. The worry. The way they care and talk and accept. Makes Steve think that it was all worth it, sometimes. Moments like this, under the stars. He gets to have this.

The Chief lets him to eventually and then they're speeding off. Steve is taking El to the weather top in the middle of the night, snacks and drinks and blankets in the back of his car. Because El has never seen a shooting star, let alone a meteor shower. And Steve is dead set to change that.

The other kids are gonna be so jealous when they hear that Steve and El went to watch the stars fall from the sky (well, not really, but that's what it looks like, and that's what Eddie weaves into his stories sometimes), but Steve doesn't care. This is for El. This is for the little girl, injured and weak and frightened, and for the boy who taught her the meaning of magic.

This is only for them.

They don't trek up to the real weather top, since it would be too exhausting of a trip, and too dangerous in the dark. Instead, Steve parks on the open field of a smaller hill that offers them a perfect, uninterrupted view of the sky. No trees, no houses, no excess light to bother them.

"Yeah, this is perfect," he mutters as he kills the engine.

They spread out the blanket together right beside the car, grabbing snacks and drinks and more blankets in case they get cold at some point. El immediately lies down and reaches for some cookies while Steve goes back to the car, putting on one of their favourite tapes. Kim Wilde's 1982 album. One of El's first ever favourite albums.

It makes Steve smile, especially when he hears the excited squeal when the first notes carry through the air.

He eventually settles beside her on the blanket, the music just loud enough to create a nice atmosphere in the otherwise quiet night, and Steve already feels like there's something incredibly special about this moment.

And then El gasps. "Steve," she whispers, pointing up at the sky above them.

He can see the last remnants of the shooting star that lit up the the night and, most importantly, El's face. She's gripping him now, frantically scanning the sky for more, and Steve chuckles, moving his arm in her grip enough to take her hand if that's what she wants.

"What was that?" she asks.

"A shooting star," Steve explains. "They're not real stars, though. There are rocks floating around in space, and sometimes the Earth will move through, like, a chain of them, and then they burn up when they enter the Earth's atmosphere. That's what makes them look like that. Pretty, right?"

She's nodding, refusing to take her eyes away from the sky, and Steve settles back, too, getting more comfortable on the blanket. It's not long before the next shooting star appears - a larger one this time, cutting through half the night sky before it disappears.

"Wow," El whispers beside him, and Steve wants to burst at that genuine wonderment in her eyes, her voice, the way she's squeezing his hand.

"You get to make a wish when you see a shooting star."

"A wish?"

"Yeah. But don't tell me. It has to be a secret wish, and then maybe it'll come true."

At that, El nods solemnly, always so damn serious, like wishing on a shooting star deserves to be treated with the utmost care and calculation. Maybe it does. Steve won't judge. It's not like El grew up with many serious opportunities to make a wish, let alone make it freely.

"Can I wish something for you?" she interrupts that particular train of thought, and Steve stops short, looking at her.

"You wanna wish something for me?" She nods. "What would you wish for me?"

She meets his eyes with a little frown. "It's secret."

"Oh. Right. Sorry."

"It's okay."

Oh, he wants to burst again. But he only squeezes her hand. "Yeah, I think you can wish something for me."

And then she only smiles, and Steve wants to know, wants to ask, wants to be seen just a bit less, wants to exist only between the stars and the wishes that El could have for him.

He closes his eyes, focusing only on her gasps, her hums, her chuckles, her little wows, and he smiles.

Later, he tells her about the constellations he remembers. Some he made up himself. Some that Eddie made up. His heart jumps a little at the thought of the metalhead he never thought to fall in love with. Eddie who loves the stars, who knows so many seafarer's tales about them, mythology that Steve doesn't know if it's genuine or if Eddie made it up. If he's writing his own mythology. Steve wouldn't put it past him.

It's long after midnight and silence has settled between them, both of them somewhere deep inside their own heads, yet anchored in the moment, together. It's serene.

Maybe it's that serenity that gets Steve talking.

"Hey El?"

"Yes?"

"I kissed Eddie."

She gasps again, but not because of a shooting star this time, and turns to face him. "You kissed Eddie?"

"Yeah." The smile is on his lips before he can even try to fight it, and he finds that he doesn't want to. "I was really scared to do it. But it was good. I think..."

"Yeah?"

Steve exhales slowly, seeking solace in El's hand, who immediately squeezes his again, her other hand coming up to run through his hair. A calming motion that never fails to ground him. El is the only one allowed to do this, the only one who does it right. "I think I might have fallen in love with Eddie."

She nods, smile on her face, and then falls forward, head landing on his chest. They don't really have a sense of personal space around each other and Steve loves it, combing through her hair now -- a motion that is just as calming.

"That was my wish."

"Come again?"

"My wish. My shooting star wish," she says, shuffling so she can look at him without moving from her spot. "I wished that you'd smile like you did when you told me you kissed Eddie. And if he makes you smile, he can stay."

"You'll allow it, huh?" Steve chuckles, but El is dead serious when she nods.

"I'll allow it."

And his chuckle turns a bit more genuine now, his lungs filling with the perfection of this moment. He has people that are fiercely protective of him. He has a pretty boy willing to kiss him that he doesn't have to share with those people yet. He has the stars above, willing to grant wishes despite the horrors they know he's seen. And he has El.

In a way, it's really all he could wish for.

El stays the night at Steve's, though he has to carry her inside from his car and wake her like he used to. They share a bed like they used to, and in the morning she'll wear his clothes like she used to.

It's good. It's perfect. And when they arrive for breakfast at ten, Hopper doesn't even call them out on being late when he sees the happy, content smiles on their faces. He just very discreetly kicks Steve's butt, but he had that coming.

[doctormage]

ok i know this was literal months ago but genuinely curious what your actual answers are for dai romances: which do you think is the best narratively, which is the most fleshed out, which do you like the best, which has the LI you like the best? also bonus q which do you think is the best written as a contained story vs best written as it meshes with the broader narrative/themes? whichever of those isn’t already covered by “best narratively” :o) bonus BONUS q: best kiss superlative???

this made my WHOLE day tysm :') as expected this got incredibly long so under a read more it goes lol

[insert general disclaimer that these are just ~my thoughts and opinions~ and i won't pretend they're inarguable/objective]

best narratively: SOLAS. SORRY

this comes as a surprise to absolutely no one but I SWEAR I don't just have solas fucker glasses on. like I do have them on but I am capable of being objective I prommy

for one, Solas himself is a critical part of the narrative! i've gone on this rant a trillion times so I won't go full throttle here, but I will go slight throttle. every single companion serves as a foil or mirror to Solas, including the inquisitor. Solas watches the inquisitor go on the exact same path that he did in becoming Fen'Harel—the loss of self, the sacrifices for the greater good, the impossible decisions that have long-standing and international impact. it HAS to be brutal to watch. extremely juicy to intertwine this with a romance.

for another, I am just. destroyed by the fact that the inquisitor can come SO CLOSE to getting him to abandon his task. they don't know who he is, what he's done, or what he's trying to do; just by virtue of being themselves, they make the world around him come to life. he is an immortal being that sees the separation from magic as the most tragic and unnatural thing possible. so much so that he doesn't even view the people who walk this earth as people at all. they're NPCs in the bad timeline to him. he's just waiting to reload his save.

and literally without even knowing any of this, the inquisitor makes the world around him come to life. they make what he sees as tranquiled husks into people he cares about. they turn a fallen, lifeless world into one worth appreciating. and, for a time, into one worth saving. (both in the sense that he stays to close the breach / save everyone from Corypheus, and in the sense that he nearly abandons his plans.)

"you're real, and it means everyone could be real. it changes everything, but it can't." like. are you serious. i'm eating drywall rn

i find it absolutely insane that his romance was a last-minute addition. it is the sparsest of the romances as far as in-game content for main game, so that part I understand, but it works so well in the overarching narrative (and presumably that of DA4 as well) that it really blows me away that we almost didn't get it. as annoying as solasmancers can be—and I know we really can be—it makes a lot of sense to me that so many people were sucked down this rabbit hole

solas is a devastatingly lonely man for a multitude of reasons. he is immortal in a world where not everyone is anymore. nearly everyone he ever knew is dead. the thing he did to prevent the Evanuris from destroying the world still, in his eyes, destroyed it anyway. it is his greatest regret and it literally surrounds him at all times and he can't talk to anyone about it. through the inquisitor he is able to know what it is to love and be loved, and it shakes him so thoroughly he nearly abandons his entire purpose. and because of that—assuming from what we know of DA4 so far—he refuses to get close to anyone ever again. for fear of laying down his burden. I FEEL INSANE!!!!

i do want to throw in a disclaimer that I think most of these things are still true with a high-approval, non-romanced inquisitor as well. my first lavellan was a Solas bestie and I maintain that the overall themes that I love in the romance are still present in the platonic arc. but we don't get the crestwood scene without the romance, and FOR ME PERSONALLY(!), that is the most crucial part of the relationship's role in the story and what it says about both his and the inquisitor's character arcs.

last thing I swear. I also think inquisition has a lot of untapped potential as a story about what people can accomplish when they work together and care for one another. I acknowledge this isn't really explored in-game but TO ME! it is an important part of the story overall and solas's place in it. he altered the fabric of reality because he wanted to help people, and eons later he stuck around to knit back up his greatest mistake...to help people. I am gutted by the fact that this might be the only time in his entire, immortal life that he had the relationships with the people around him like he does while in the inquisition. AND by the fact that rather than see what caring for one another accomplished, he sees it was a weakness. completely misses the point because his shame and regret is just too suffocating. again i'm extrapolating a lot here but I couldn't not mention it in an answer about why I find his romance the best narratively lol

i'm so sorry this became literally an essay but academia never leaves you and I will also never not be deeply unwell about Solas. I hope this answered your question and wasn't just me losing my mind for 7 straight paragraphs (jesus christ) dksfjsdk but yeah. i'm done now

most fleshed out: CULLEN

this is a Bit hard for me to say bc i've only fully romanced 3 LIs in inquisition (Josie, Solas, Cass). i've read through/watched the others but imo it's not quite the same as experiencing the major beats of the relationship alongside the rest of the game. ANYWAY

to me the cullenmance seems most fleshed out, and I would be surprised if it didn't since he's been around for 3 whole games. they're able to rely on the players' past experiences with him as a kind of shorthand to develop his character (imo) and that history makes it feel a little fuller than romances with people you've only met this game. and he's the only other LI you can marry in trespasser and i am naught but a bitter josiemancer at the end of the day

also it pisses me off tremendously bc EYE think if they had actually put any effort or thought into his "redemption" he could've been one of the most impactful romances in the game! perhaps even second after solas! they had such a juicy opportunity w him (character-wise AND romance-wise) and they just. fumbled the absolute shit out of it. but idk why I expected anything else tbh slkdfjd

romance I like best: JOSIE <3

i'm taking this to mean the one I would like best for myself, and i'm sure i'm at least partially biased bc she was my first EVER dragon age romance but I really, really love Josephine's. I find it so sweet and such a great extension of her character <333 I love being able to go smooch her in the gardens whenever you want, I love that you get her to unwind a little, and I love the whirlwind fairytale drama of it all when you literally duel for her hand. is it unrealistic that the other dude would just give up? perhaps but idc it's TRUE LOVE and it CONQUERS ALL

I also personally find the leliana shotgun talk endearing bc it gives us a glimpse into their friendship. genuinely one of my only complaints is that I can't marry her/didn't get a romance specific scene w her in trespasser. like you just go to the opera. but whatever it's fine bc I love her so much. Josie deserves the world and, as someone who has spent her life taking care of others, she deserves someone who wants to take care of HER. I love that the inquisitor can be that for her :') additionally the epilogue slides (at least if you disband the inquisition idr what the others say) are fucking adorable bc her family loves you!!!

LI I like best: JOSIE AGAIN <3

antivan girllll I love youuuuu!! Solas doesn't win this title bc honestly he annoys me sometimes and Josie never annoys me lmao (I do still like him and think I would if I was a person in-game, but I gotta be realistic). I wish I had a deeper answer to this but I just think she's sweet, funny, interesting, beautiful, smart, sexy, and cool. I love that she's aggressively organized and that she can diffuse almost any situation and that she loves to talk shit and that she has regular tea parties with the other advisors. she is so cute and I love her!!! just in case I haven't said it enough times already!!!

best written as contained story + best written as it meshes with broader narratives/themes: I'M BALD/NUANCED ANSWER

tbh. the josiemance is probably one of the best ones (imo) as a contained story. you could completely remove it from the game and it would still make sense and be cute. it CAN mesh with the broader narratives/themes but it really doesn't have to and I haven't thought about this at all until just now! wow!

actually maybe i'll sort it this way. of the ones that could function well as standalone: Josie, Cassandra

ones that didn't NEED to happen during inquisition but still fit in well thematically: Blackwall, Dorian, Bull

ones that mesh best with the game's broader narratives/themes: Solas obviously, Cullen, and...Sera, actually, I think!

given that inquisition is about losing your personhood and being treated as a symbol, I appreciate that Sera is someone who tries to stay grounded and keep the inquisitor grounded. pretty sure the inquisitor actually says so verbatim to her in the scene after the post-corypheus party. she loves you for YOU, and reminds you that you are "a people" and not just the inquisitor, and that becomes a rare and beautiful gift by the end of the inq's story arc :')

i reserve the right to switch these around w more thought but for now I think i'll leave it there lol

best kiss(!!!): STILL BALD/NUANCE

to get the obligatory solasfucker brain rot answer out of the way: when he kisses the inquistor while removing their arm. I won't write another 7 paragraphs about it but just know that I COULD. lmfao

i love the Josie kiss after you duel for her hand ;_; and the one at the very end of the scene where her foot pops like mia in the princess diaries ;_; wah

i swear i'm not exclusively picking ones that i've personally romanced!! there are many good kisses those are just my favs

ANYWAY!

thank you SO MUCH for this ask I had an incredible time answering it this was extremely fun for me. and a good excuse to go back and watch all 8 romances via YouTube lskdjfslkdjf but fr thank you <3

[kaizen-design-studio]

TOO MUCH INFORMATION, VERY LESS TIME – MAKING AN UNFORGETTABLE VIDEO

There will always be a scenario when a corporate client tells a video production company to make a corporate video for them in only two minutes. Given the number of huge projects they have undertaken, it seems difficult.

There are huge assets to be shown and a lot of information to be conveyed. Here lies the problem. Including every piece of information can have a negative effect. As the human mind has limits, grasping too much information can result in less recall value. A lot of information can be tempting, and making an excellent video conveying each piece can be easier, but this may impact negatively on the company. There are some misconceptions that make the corporate video forgettable and boring. Let’s shade a light on some of them.

Misconception 1: More information equals to more value.

We may be driven by a conception that offering more information through video would provide more value. Turns out, this is a misconception. Studies show that people can remember the only handful of points out of a video. So, instead of conveying 10 points, convey only 5. The best way to do this to determine the priorities and which points can be focused on to make the maximum impact. Moreover, focus on emotional engagement rather than loading the video with a lot of information. Engaging the viewer emotionally will increase the recall value. Telling a story creatively will help in engaging them emotionally and making an unforgettable video. There is a rule of thumb which states that there should be 20-30 seconds breathing room in a two-minute video.

Misconception 2: There is no difference between written messaging & video messaging

There are professionals who are good at conveying the message through the textual format. They believe saying what they want to convey through a 300-word text will have the same impact in a minute video. However, they do not have an idea of what can be conveyed in that minute. They also believe that what can be conveyed in 100 seconds through text can be conveyed in the 100-second video. There is a conception that the impact of conveying through a well-written message in the voice-led video will make the same impact as a blog post. This is a misconception. It needs to be determined by the message that needs to be conveyed. Moreover, an average reading speed is 200 words per minute, but average speaking speed is 150 words per minute. To read what is on paper may take 75 seconds, but to speak it on video takes 100 seconds. Adding imagery and music along with breathing space, the video length will exceed to make the impact. There is a difference between a written message and a video message. Opt for a way based on what needs to be conveyed.

Misconception 3: I understood what I convey, so will my audience

Video producers need to take the point of view of the audience into consideration while making a video. Making a video based on your point of view may result in a great video, but if the audience does not understand, it will of no use. There is a misconception that if a video producer understands what needs to be conveyed in the video, everyone else will. Conveying the information in a way the target audience will understand is important. This will help in making an unforgettable video.

Making a corporate video is one of the essential strategies of branding. It helps in gaining a wide exposure and engaging audience in a very less time. Being one of the leading corporate video production companies, Kaizen Design Studio helps corporate companies convey the information in the most effective and creative way to make the maximum impact.

[antianakin]

Oh yeah I have done my fair share of enjoying the angsty potential of Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan's relationship and how that impacts what we see in TPM, for sure.

It's not HELPED by Jedi Apprentice basically taking the tragedy that is their relationship in TPM and going "So how do I make that hurt EVEN MORE" and deciding to add in all the extra drama of their early years with the uncertainty and the rejection and the struggle all making that look Obi-Wan gives Qui-Gon in the Council chambers feel pretty loaded. Like even if they're a lot BETTER by TPM and in a pretty good place, even if you accept that Qui-Gon HAD NOT BEEN PLANNING TO DO THIS, that history would still impact how it would make Obi-Wan feel in the moment.

But then it also just says so much more about Obi-Wan as a character for him to then have to take a minute to calm down and reflect and realize that what happened in the Council chambers WASN'T just yet another rejection or abandonment, that he was overreacting to a perceived slight that simply wasn't there, and then choosing to apologize to Qui-Gon later. Because now there's a LOT more that he's having to overcome in order to get to that point and it really indicates how much he's grown. So even if you take the drama from Jedi Apprentice into account, I think you can still view it generally the way it was intended to be viewed in canon.

But of course, Jedi Apprentice ISN'T actually canon, so a lot of people have also just made a big deal out of Obi-Wan looking shocked and confused for like 2 seconds in TPM and then ignoring how Obi-Wan is the one who later apologizes to Qui-Gon, not the other way around. Ignoring that kind-of eliminates a pretty major aspect of what development Obi-Wan even has in this film. This is Obi-Wan coming of age, this is Obi-Wan learning to be independent, this is Obi-Wan SHOWING US why Qui-Gon believes in him enough to entrust him with Anakin's training (and why Yoda and the Council ultimately do, too).

And yeah, I think comparing it to the scene in ROTJ works well because both of them involve a student/teacher relationship where the teacher has to make a decision that the student doesn't necessarily like or even entirely understand initially and it causes them some confusion and maybe even a little pain, but that they ultimately have to come to accept before they can truly move forward as a Jedi Knight. Yes, Qui-Gon drops Obi-Wan, and Obi-Wan lies to Luke, but both of them did what they felt like they had to for the greater good, and both Obi-Wan and Luke eventually recognize that and let go of their initial reactions. And by the end, that maturity is what allows them to then face and overcome the representation of their own darkness. If you miss that step by just blaming the teachers for being terrible people, you kind-of lose the whole story as a result.

@theneutralmime

Oh man, Qui-Gon is one of my faves, in part because I think he's an amazingly complex character despite how little screen time he actually has.

I don't think Qui-Gon ever explicitly says that he doesn't think Obi-Wan is ready for the trials. I could be wrong, and people can correct me if this is a specific quote that he has in TPM, but what I remember is him making the quick correction to Obi-Wan about focusing on the here and now in their first scene and then telling him that he still has much to learn during their conversation on Coruscant. For the first scene, regardless of whether he thinks Obi-Wan is ready for the trials for not, Obi-Wan is still his student RIGHT NOW and so it is his duty to make corrections and guide Obi-Wan on the right path until that is no longer true. For the second scene, it's entirely possible to recognize that Obi-Wan is ready to take the trials AND that he has more to learn at the same time. I'm sure this is true for basically EVERY new Knight, because they'd all be fairly young still at this point, at the beginnings of their journey as a Jedi still, not the end. And even if you make it to being a Master, it never means you stop having things to learn. Yoda has an entire test during the Force Ghost arc about how you ALWAYS have more to learn, no matter how old you get. So I don't think that either of these moments would explicitly mean that Qui-Gon thinks Obi-Wan isn't ready for the trails before he makes that declaration to the Council.

But the other thing I think could be true as well is that, while Obi-Wan probably IS ready to face the trials, Qui-Gon might not have been thinking about it within that immediate of a timeframe. He might've been planning on a few more months, maybe a year or so, to just finish things off a little with Obi-Wan. It doesn't mean he doesn't think Obi-Wan is ready, but just that he would've chosen to finish Obi-Wan's apprenticeship differently had he had the choice. But when Anakin comes into the picture, he believes so wholeheartedly in Anakin being the Chosen One that he is willing to sacrifice that time with Obi-Wan in order to ensure Anakin gets the training he needs. Obi-Wan will not SUFFER for losing those few months, he's ready enough that he'll be fine regardless and can continue to learn what he needs to learn as a Knight. Anakin, however, COULD suffer from not being allowed to have ANY training and Qui-Gon is being put in a position where either HE trains Anakin or NOBODY DOES.

This was NOT what Qui-Gon wanted, there's zero indication that Qui-Gon was aiming to be Anakin's master at any point before this moment, that he wanted the glory of being the Chosen One's master or whatever. Qui-Gon seems BAFFLED that the Council isn't just letting Anakin join, which indicates to me that he was expecting to just leave Anakin with the rest of the kids his age and move on from there. MAYBE he'd take Anakin as a Padawan after Obi-Wan's apprenticeship had finished, but I don't think that's something he was genuinely even thinking about yet and he certainly wasn't anticipating being put in a position where he had to choose between the two. So Qui-Gon's two scenes with Obi-Wan where he is still treating Obi-Wan like a student with things to learn could easily be an indication that Qui-Gon is just not quite planning on ending the apprenticeship yet even though Obi-Wan is ready to move forward.

Of course Qui-Gon says he's proud of Obi-Wan, I don't know that that was truly ever in question. Obi-Wan is caught by SURPRISE by Qui-Gon's choice in the Council chamber and he definitely takes it a little personally because Qui-Gon is absolutely dropping him unexpectedly to take on another Padawan, but Obi-Wan's apology later indicates that he recognizes that Qui-Gon's choice WASN'T PERSONAL. It wasn't an indication of a lack of care on Qui-Gon's part or even real favoritism towards Anakin, but just that Qui-Gon was forced to make a choice and Anakin needed him more than Obi-Wan did. But Obi-Wan recognizing that mistake and apologizing to Qui-Gon for it shows that Qui-Gon wasn't wrong and Obi-Wan IS just as ready as Qui-Gon said he was, which is why he says he believes Obi-Wan is wiser than he is and that he'll make a great Jedi Knight.

And Qui-Gon thinking Obi-Wan has more to learn or giving a quick gentle correction doesn't mean he ISN'T proud of Obi-Wan, either. Like I said earlier, the Jedi generally recognize that everyone will always have more to learn, you never STOP learning. In the scene where he says Obi-Wan has more to learn, he puts his hand on Obi-Wan's shoulder, which is a pretty obvious show of affection. Qui-Gon's faith in the Force (and his interpretation of it) isn't necessarily something he can teach Obi-Wan, it's something Obi-Wan will have to learn FOR HIMSELF. And aside from that quick correction about focusing on the here and now, we constantly see Qui-Gon trusting Obi-Wan. He leaves Obi-Wan on his own with the Naboo (which at the time would've included the Queen, so he's trusting Obi-Wan with protecting the Queen AND with being the Queen's primarily Jedi advisor), he trusts Obi-Wan's judgment about where to land the ship, and he lets Obi-Wan step forward to make a point to Boss Nass. There's so many moments where you can see how much responsibility Qui-Gon trusts Obi-Wan with, something I don't think he'd do if he WASN'T proud of Obi-Wan in general.

So yeah, Qui-Gon's proud of Obi-Wan, he thinks Obi-Wan is ready to become a Knight, he thinks Obi-Wan is wise and will be a GREAT Knight. And he ALSO thinks Obi-Wan has more to learn because OF COURSE HE DOES. Obi-Wan is 25 years old, he's got SO MUCH life ahead of him. These things don't contradict for me, I think Qui-Gon is perfectly capable of believing all of them at once, and I think it's possible for them to all be TRUE at once.

[whimsicallyreading]

You Don’t Even Go Here

Day Two for Rowaelin Month

A college AU

~

Aelin grins mischievously as she walks up the stairs of the men's dorm at Terresan University. The teal-blue waffle iron clutched under her arm.

Aedion didn't really need it. It had been on the fifty-percent-off rack at the supermarket, and he'd simply thrown it in the cart for good measure. Yet, when Aelin saw the box for it laying the hall, she'd seen opportunity.

It had hit her harder than she'd thought. Aedion leaving. They'd been raised like siblings but grew up something closer to best friends. It wasn't fair that he was nearly three years older and ready to leave when she wasn't prepared for him to go.

Aelin had cried the whole car ride home. Then when they finally got back to the house, she'd called him right away. He could hear how teary she was and happily obliged her call. Narrating his actions as he went about setting up his dorm room. He teased her about missing him, but she could tell that he missed her too.

So, armed with an excuse to visit him, Aelin made the hour-long drive to visit her cousin.

Aelin was halfway up the stairs but not paying too much attention to her surroundings. She was too busy repeating Aedion's room number over in her head because no matter how many times she checked her phone, it just wouldn't stick in her head. Maybe if she'd focused a little more on the things happening around her, she wouldn't have crashed into a half-naked man.

A solid and calloused hand darts out and grips her shoulder before she can go tumbling down the stairs. Its twin desperately clutching the towel wrapped around his waist.

Aelin looks up apologetically, and her jaw nearly falls to the floor. His white hair was still damp from the shower and swooped over the top of his head, and his biceps were too large for Aelin to wrap both hands around. An intricate tattoo coils elegantly from a cheekbone and down the length of his body.

He was a man indeed. Nothing like Chaol or Dorian or any of her junior friends. This was a new breed of man. The apex kind. Aelin is pretty sure she looks like a deer in the headlights, and she's too busy ogling him to understand the words he'd been repeating to her.

"Are you okay?" His eyebrows are furrowed as if he's afraid he'd literally struck her stupid. Aelin felt that wasn't far from the truth.

"Yes, sorry," she apologizes as she steps back, suddenly very aware of how in his personal space she was. "I wasn't paying attention. You just caught me by surprise."

Aelin was definitely panicking. Where was her swagger when she needed it most? Why would it choose now to abandon her?

By some miracle, he doesn't seem off-put by her awkwardness. In fact, a smile curls the edges of his lips, revealing a set of dimples that made her heart stumble.

Gods he had dimples.

"No, I ran into you. It's my fault. My name is Rowan.”

He holds out a hand, and Aelin shakes it clumsily. "I'm Aelin."

"Aelin." She loves the way her name rolls off his tongue. "I haven't seen you around before. Are you a freshman?"

Oh no. Aelin's eyes widen, but she recovers swiftly and smooths her features out. Rowan thinks she's a student. Not some crazy high schooler too emotionally dependent on her cousin.

"I'm actually a junior," Aelin laughs at his perplexed expression. "I don't go here, though. I'm just stopping by to drop off some things my cousin forgot."

White lies. What was a white lie worth? Aelin likely wouldn't ever see him again, and is it so wrong for a girl to enjoy some harmless attention? If Aelin spent more time thinking about it, she probably wouldn't like the answers she'd come up with, but that was neither here nor there.

"Is that a waffle maker?" Rowan's green eyes glint with amusement.

"My cousin loves to eat. What year are you?" Aelin crosses her fingers that he's the same age as Aedion and not a senior or something. Her cousin would murder her if he found out she flirted with a man five years older.

"Don't we all? I'm a sophomore, a bit younger than you, I suppose." Rowan drags a hand through his hair. "Listen, I know you came to see your cousin, but maybe I could get your number, and we could get a cup of coffee before you head out?"

Was this really happening? Aelin inwardly squealed with excitement. Lysandra would die when she recounted this story later. "Sure."

Just as she pulled her phone from her pocket, an all too familiar voice materialized behind her. "Aelin?"

Aedion smiles as he lays eyes on his beloved cousin. He takes a couple steps down the stairs, and that grin quickly fades as he sees the naked man.

Oops, she'd forgotten that detail.

"Rowan?" Aedion's eyes harden as they lock on Rowan. "Why the hell are you ogling my cousin with no clothes on?"

"You know him?" Aelin swears under her breath. She cannot believe her luck.

Aedion laughs coldly as he sizes up Rowan, "He's my roommate, but he's about to be a corpse. Why are you perving on my seventeen-year-old cousin?"

Rowan's looks between the bewildered. "You said you were a junior?"

Aedion laughs harshly as Aelin blushes. "I am...just in highschool. Not college. I told you I didn't go here."

"I didn't realize I was rooming with a pedophile," Aedion grabs Aelin and pulls her to his chest. "Was he bothering you?"

"Pedophile?" Rowan's dimples have disappeared, and he looks at Aedion disturbed. "I'm only nineteen!"

Aelin shoves away from Aedion's boorish grip. "The only one bothering me is you."

Rowan's cheeks are flushed red as the full impact of the situation they were found in dawns on him. Damn it if Aelin didn't find his blush endearing. He is a solid chunk of muscle. How is everything he does so cute?

"Look, I just got out of the shower, and I bumped into Aelin. It was an accident. She was just on her way to give you your waffle maker-"

"You brought my waffle maker?" Aedion cuts Rowan off, eyeing the box under her arm.

That's when Aelin sees it. The twinkle of mischief in his eye and the forced concern. Aedion was playing her. He obviously knew Rowan wasn't a creep and saw the perfect opportunity to cause chaos. Aelin scowls at him, and that spark grows brighter. It's moments like this she wonders why she ever missed her cousin in the first place.

Aedion tugs the box out of her grasp and smiles. "Wow. This is perfect timing. Vaughn and Fen were just talking about making breakfast for dinner." He looks at Aelin and forces a frown. "If I'd known you were coming, I would have invited you, but it would kind of be rude to bring a guest now."

"What?" Aelin sputters. She drove all this way, and he was really going to ditch her? It was embarrassing, but tears prickled at the edges of her eyes. He was an ass, but she obviously came because she missed him, and he didn't even care? She really thought they were closer than that.

"Yeah. Sorry, Lin." Aedion points at Rowan, who was just standing to the side, thoroughly uncomfortable. Yet, despite the awkwardness, he hadn't left. "Hey, you owe me one for creeping on my little cousin. Earn my trust back and see that she has something for dinner and gets to her car safely? She has my phone number, one bad text, and your ass is grass."

Aedion tosses her a wink, and it's all Aelin can do to keep from outright gaping. Rowan looks stunned, his eyes darting between the two Ashryvver's. They settle on Aelin for a moment too long. Some of the tension eases from his shoulders, and he smiles. "I think I can manage that."

"Good." Aedion turns back up the stairs pats the box. "Thanks for bringing it to me, Lin. I'll call you tomorrow, don't send me to voicemail."

Just like that, her cousin, a walking, talking agent-of-chaos, disappears back to wherever he came from.

"So," Rowan starts, "If you want, I know a perfect Italian place we could swing by, my treat seeing as I plowed into you."

Aelin frowns and fiddles with the end of her necklace. "You aren't upset that I lied?"

"You didn't lie." Rowan chuckles, a deep sound that sends a shiver of delight down Aelin's spine. "You don't go here."

Aelin tilts her head as if she's deeply considering the offer. "I suppose it couldn't hurt. What's good there?"

"They have an awesome kabob." Rowan tugs his towel tighter. "It's my favorite."

It's Aelin's turn to laugh. "Isn't that just meat on a stick?"

"Let's go, and I can show you how profoundly wrong you are," he moves to take a step down, but Aelin stops him with a hand to the shoulder. "What is it?"

Aelin points to his towel, "I don't think they will serve guests without pants."

The flush that Aelin loves his back full force as he scrambles the other direction up the stairs. "Shit. Give me five minutes. I'll be right back. Aedion better have not locked out or I swear-"

Rowan's embarrassed tirade quiets as he charges up to his dorm to change. Aelin smiling as he goes. She can't believe she's going out to dinner with a guy like that.

Opening her phone, she sends a quick heart emoji to her cousin. He instantly replies back with one of his own. Aedion may have moved to college, but he still had her back at the end of the day. Even if it wasn't in the most ideal way.

Rowan comes back down the stairs moments later, and she's not disappointed by what she sees. He took the time to put on a flannel shirt and comb some gel through his hair. While the view without clothes had been pleasant, Aelin could definitely appreciate this look too.

"I'm ready if you are," Rowan extends an arm to help her down the stairs.

It's such a fussy, old-man move, and she loves it.

"Let's go."

[jamie-leah]

Traitor

Bucky x Reader

Oneshot

Summary: Everyone thinks you're a traitor but Bucky isn't convinced.

Word: 2592

Warnings: Swearing, action stuff, hints at abuse and violence at the end.

A/N: I had a half formed daydream that turned into this. Starts strong, ends weak, enjoy!

Oneshot Masterlist Series Masterlist

Steve throws your file on the desk in front of Bucky. Bucky just stares at your face on the front of the folder, pinned by a silver paper clip.

Silver was your favourite type of jewellery. Bucky remembered storing the information away for when he bought you a silver necklace for your birthday not long ago.

“I’m sorry, Buck, but we had an operative confirm everything I just told you. Y/N is a contract killer, an assassin and she was sent here to infiltrate and kill. Namely, all of us.”

Bucky hears the words coming from Steve’s mouth, but he can’t understand them. Images of you flash in his mind. You laughing at one of his lame jokes, you crying in his arms from a nightmare, you underneath him moaning his name as he kisses a trail down your neck.

Bucky shakes his head, “I don’t believe that Steve, I can’t. Who’s the source? How do you know they’re legit?”

Steve picks up a remote and points it at a screen in the room. It blinks to life on a still image of you in a restaurant, kissing the cheek of one of the most prominent mob bosses in the city and known Hydra agent.

Bucky stands so fast his chair cracks on the floor as he tears out of the office at full speed. He skips passed the elevator and takes the stairs, missing steps in his rush.

He keeps going and going until he hits the lowest level underneath the tower and storms passed all the guards. None of them challenge him, too afraid of the former Winter Soldier to get in his way.

As Bucky gets to the cells, he grabs an agent by the scruff and grinds out, “which cell?”

They all knew who he was talking about. Everyone would be talking about this for a while to come. The agent points into the open space of cells and stutters, “its, c-cell 203”.

Bucky drops the agent and stalks through the cells until he finally comes to 203. He steps into view with clenched fists and doesn’t pause before he asks, “why?”

You sit on the edge of the cot, elbows on knees, staring at the grey wall opposite. It takes you a moment to build up the courage to look at him. You never intended for this to happen. You never wanted to get feelings involved, but as you look at Bucky, you know it’s far too late for that now. Now you have a mess on your hands.

You debate how to play this. Do you keep up the contract killer façade or do you confess, tell him everything you’ve ever wanted to tell another human being before?

“Barnes, I should have known you would pay me a visit sooner rather than later.”

Bucky felt like you had struck him in the face with the way you addressed him, but he holds firm, “why?”

“Why what? I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific”, you reply coolly as you stand to face him.

Bucky changes his question, “is it true? Are you a contract killer?”

It takes you a few moments to keep the mask in place, “yes”.

You watch the pain flash across his features for the briefest of moments before he locks it away to be felt in private. It breaks your heart, but you’re so used to the feeling it never shows on your face.

Bucky goes to turn from you, wanting to get away, the sight of you too much to bear. You throw a question out into the void between you before he can retreat, “are you really going to leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”

Bucky never turns back to look at you, but he whispers, “was any of it ever real?”

Despite knowing this was the question, despite hearing it from a few people across your lifetime, it was the first time it ever hit you in the gut with such force you had to take a silent gulp of air before choking out, “no”.

He leaves without another word.

You wait a few days. Working out the routine of the place before you wait for your next move.

You wait with your back to a small portion of the concrete wall next to the cell door. A blind spot. And when the guard brings your food and slides it under the metal bars, he looks up to find you missing.

Just as he steps closer to look, you strike. You shoot your arms between the bars and pull so hard his head bangs into the metal and he crumples, out cold.

You drag is body parallel to the door and you sweep his body for keys. You start to lose hope when your hand flits over cool metal and a little jingle rings out.

You wait fifteen minutes until lights out and the use the keys. You drag the guard into the cell, swapping your uniforms before closing the door and locking him in. You check all your hair is tucked until the cap before heading for the locked door between freedom and your prison.

You rap on the metal with your heart beating furiously against your ribcage. But the door opens without a problem and you have to stop yourself from sprinting down the hall and up the stairwell.

Once you make it up one flight of stairs with no alarms raised you start to sprint. Before you leave, you have to make it back to your room for your go bag. You can’t leave it when it has all the information you need for what started this all off.

You run and run and run. You run until your lungs burn with a fire that’s been flowing in your veins since you were born. You run until your legs scream at you to stop and just when you don’t think you can take any more flights of stairs, you make it to the top.

You stop. Your hand on the handle, taking a moment to get your breathing under control. You push the handle down slowly and open the door a crack to find the hallway in darkness.

You slip through and creep on the tiles without a sound as you make it to the first spare room in the hall.

You get into the room no problem and let out a breath when you realise no one knows you used this room to stash your information.

You waste no time in grabbing your go back from the closet, checking everything you need is in there before heading for the door again. Three steps from the exit and alarms scream out, waking everyone from their slumber. The alarm is followed by a female robotic voice, “alert, alert, prisoner escape. Alert, alert, prisoner escape.”

You swear under your breath as you rush out the door to see Bucky, Natasha and Sam at the end of the hall, near the stairway. Your only exit.

They spot you seconds after you spot them, and you take off running in the opposite direction. You can’t afford a hand to hand with all three of them. As confident as you are in your abilities they have just as much, and you don’t want to hurt them.

They shout in your direction, but you ignore them as you unzip your bag and rummage around for a miracle. You get to the living space when you finally feel it and a flimsy plan comes to mind.

You turn, gun in both hands as you drop the go bag. Bucky, Natasha and Sam all creep into the room, guns pointed in your direction as yours is in theirs.

“There’s nowhere else to go now, Y/N,” Sam says in his calm way.

You hold firm, the sofas keeping the four of you apart. You look in Bucky’s direction as you talk, “things are more complicated than they seem. And I’m sorry you were caught up in it. I’m not a good person and I’ll get what I deserve, but I have something I need to do first.”

“And what’s that? Kills us?”, Nat asks.

You shake your head, still looking at Bucky, “If I wanted to kill you, I could have done it three times over. You’re not my mission.”

“Then give yourself up and explain.” Sam tries to reason.

You lower your gun slowly, “it would take too long, and you may never believe me. I can’t afford that, and I’ll never get a chance like this again.”

Bucky remains silent throughout the whole exchange, but you study each other the entire time. You try to convey that you lied earlier before reaching up your arm with lightning speed.

Two shots and the chandelier that Stark insisted on installing for the living room crashes in front of the three as you turn and shoot the glass window. As the glass spiderwebs, you drop the gun and run at full speed. You have a moment to acknowledge that throwing yourself from the top of the tower is the dumbest move you’ve ever made as the air rushes to greet you.

You twist with a hand in your pocket and throw upwards, watching and praying for your miracle to work as the rope and hook catches and you plummet.

You fall down the building on the rope watching the ground and unclip at the last second, rolling with the momentum as the impact jars through your bones.

Bucky couldn’t believe you threw yourself out the window. He was the first to recover, leaping over the lights and the sofa to dive head first after you. He digs his metal hand into the concrete and slides down after you.

He sees you roll and run immediately like the pro that you are and wastes no time pursuing you.

You dart between traffic and glance behind to see him behind you. You growl in frustration at the stubborn solider, having to change your plans once again as you head for the roads.

You instinctively feel Bucky gaining on you with the serum pumping through his veins so when you spot a cargo truck coming on the road below. You don’t hesitate to jump off the road you’re on and slam into the truck underneath.

Your lungs scream for the third time that night as all the air leaves them, but you pay no attention as you look up to find Bucky staring after you.

You walk in the quiet of the night, looking down at the folded piece of paper. You check you have the right address when the empty warehouse finally comes into view. You slip in without any problems and head over to the machine where you stashed more stuff.

Just as you go to reach for the bag you hear the click of a gun. You freeze. You turn slowly, with your hands visible and find yourself staring into the face of Bucky and the barrel of his gun.

You resist the urge to roll your eyes and sigh, “how did you find me?”

“Please, do you really think I don’t know you after all this time? After our talk in the cells, I checked all the spare rooms. Found your go bag and the addresses. This was the closest one to the tower”, Bucky replies with an easy shrug.

You nod your head, “but if you found them, why did you leave them there? Why didn’t you tell anyone else?”.

“Tell me what’s going on, Y/N”, Bucky dodges the question.

You knew there was no other way out of this now. You had to tell him if you ever had a hope of getting this done tonight.

“Look, can you put the gun down-“

“Not until you tell me what’s going on. I can’t trust you.”

You pretend like his words don’t hurt, though they’re warranted, “okay, okay. Look, most of it is true. I am a contract killer. Long story short, I was born into a mob family. Mum died giving birth to me and left me and my older sister with my piece of shit father, the “use you as an ashtray type father”. At least he did with my sister. She took the brunt of his shit…anyway, when I turned 13 and had my first period, he sold me to a man. That man? Was the mob boss I know you saw me with, Joe Selene. I’ll skip passed all the torture and right to the part where he trained me as a contract killer for him and bided my time. My father had gone underground and with my limited access to resources I couldn’t find him.”

Bucky lowers the gun as you go through your story, his features softening at your tale of tragedy.

“I swore to my sister that I would come for her but I needed to gain the trust of Selene so I could get the resources to find my father. That was when he got involved with Hydra and they asked him to take you out. I agreed, knowing that you would have all the resources I needed to find my father and my sister.”

Bucky shakes his head, “why didn’t you tell me, us, any of this? We could have helped you.”

You look away from him, “because about a week after I got to the tower, I read my sisters name in the obituary. All the people I had killed to get to my sister was for nothing. She died alone, waiting for a rescue that never came and I knew…I knew that I was going to kill that bastard for everything that happened. I also knew that none of you would let me. You would reason about justice and doing things the right way. But I know what’s right and that’s that bastard six feet under and in hell.”

You look back up at Bucky to find him already watching you. You square your shoulders and jut your chin as you say, “so, you’re either with me or against me and so help me God, if you try to stop me from leaving this building and killing that piece of shit, I will not hesitate to put you down. I told you that you’re not my mission, but I will damn make sure nothing gets in the way.”

Bucky nods, “I’m in.”

You turn back to your bag and pull out the knives to strap around your body. You hand a few to Bucky and he takes them without a word.

As he turns to head back out of the warehouse you throw the question out again, “are you really going to leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”

Bucky turns to look at you this time. He captures your eyes with his as he stares into your soul and whispers, “was any of it real?”

You reply without hesitation, “yes. Every single word.”

Bucky takes a few long strides before grabbing your face with his hands and crashing his lips to yours in a bruising kiss. You return with the same ferocity, gripping his shirt in your fists to try and bring his body closer to yours.

When you can no longer breathe, you break the kiss. You both pant as Bucky brings his forehead down to meet yours. He whispers, “after we go drop a few bodies, what do you say we go take a trip. Just you and me?”

[jdrizzle15]

Her Second Return

Just like all of you, and especially my fellow Penny fans, I am absolutely devastated by the Volume 8 finale. I had been in quite a state these last few days, utterly heartbroken, and actually nauseous at times. It feels strange to me to be legitimately grieving a fictional character, but it’s not a bad thing to feel this way. To me, this just shows that CRWBY loves her just as much as us to have written her so well that we connect so completely with her, that it feels like we lost an actual piece of ourselves when she’s gone.

But as you can probably tell by the title, this mega post isn’t gonna be about accepting this end, not in the slightest! Today I want to share canon evidence that can point towards another return of our beloved quirky red headed cinnamon bun! I’m here to spread this hope that I and others in the Nuts & Dolts dolts Discord server have!

I have this separated into many different sections to keep these thoughts organized. With that said, here goes…

A Father’s Words:

In Episode 7 of Volume 7, ‘Worst Case Scenario’ we learn the origins of Penny’s aura, and thus her soul. We also learn that it takes more aura each time she’s brought back. This leaves open an option that could be used at a later point.

Many people theorized that Pietro could indeed revive Penny one more time, which he would absolutely do. But there also lies the possibility that someone else could donate some of theirs, I’m not sure about this as I feel like it’s akin to blood donation where compatibility matters or there's a high risk of altering her, but the possibility is definitely there.

Now, the conversation in Chapter 5 of Volume 8, ‘Amity’ that Pietro and Penny have is an important moment for both Father and Daughter. It was there to show how her death in PvP all that time ago really did have a heavy impact on him and is still affecting him to this day.

Instead of continuing to pretend that everything is A-okay, like he had done for most of Volume 7, he finally lets his true feelings about how it come out to Penny for what is quite likely the first time. Even going so far as to say "Are you asking me to go through that again?" when she offers to take the risk of trying to lift Amity with her power. He wants Penny to be able to live her life.

This entire scene with Pietro established “this is what will likely happen” even if circumstances are much different now, it doesn’t negate the fact that this is a key part of Penny’s story. Scenes like these have a purpose beyond simply making an eventual death all the more heart wrenching. Her never actually getting to live her life makes those scenes basically moot. It makes them effectively pointless from narrative point of view. Unless there's more to it.

Building Relationship:

The build up between Ruby and Penny the last two volumes has been absolutely phenomenal with a definite destination in mind, and this doesn’t feel like that destination. So much of the arc of this season was to help Penny. This girl that our main protagonist absolutely adores and treasures, it would just be awful to throw all of that out for what amounts to an avoidable end. Why use so much of their precious and very limited runtime on deliberately building up this relationship only to end it abruptly, and permanently, when they’re separated?

In my opinion, RT is definitely smarter now than to intentionally set up what was really looking like a budding gay relationship only to kill one of them for good. If N&D wasn't actually going in a romantic direction, why would they leave in all of the romance-adjacent stuff that they got, that's not how ‘just friends’ act. And that is not something you use such valuable time building up for absolutely no pay off whatsoever...

Representation of Hope:

At its core, RWBY has always been about hope. It’s not at the forefront the whole time, but there's been an underlying theme of hopefulness that has persisted since it began. Some describe the show as a Hopepunk, I personally find this to describe RWBY really well. This genre of storytelling is about caring for things deeply and the courage and strength it takes to do so. It’s about never submitting or accepting the way things are. Fighting for what you believe in and standing up for others. RWBY fits all of this extremely well. How does this relate to Penny? She has been shown to be a sign of hope for everyone, but especially for Ruby, the main main protagonist. A prerequisite for a Hopepunk story is the hope.

Her first death in V3 was something that fundamentally changed Ruby. For the first time in the series, we see our main character all but broken by this event. With the loss of Penny, immediately afterwards, Ruby’s hope followed. She made up for it through determination and force of will. We see it affect her multiple times throughout the journey to Volume 7. But upon her return in V7, Hope reached a high point for everyone, the sheer relief on Ruby’s face is plain to see!

In V8 chapter 5 ‘Amity’, Penny literally raises hope by lifting the arena into the sky so Ruby could spread her message. And when she falls, and Amity with her, the connection is lost and hope plummets again. From there things take a very negative turn with the hack begins to take Penny’s agency.

In chapter 11 ’Risk’ is the point in the arc where everyone is reunited for the moment, so two separate hero stories are no longer a thing at that point in time. For the time being focus seemed to be shifted to care about the characters and how they’re going to solve the current problems. This is also where Ruby reaches her lowest emotional point in the season.

It’s not huge, but it’s interesting how connected this is. Before Ruby and Yang share a good cry over learning the possible fate of Summer, Yang brings up restoring optimism and hope to Ruby after the younger sister storms out of the room in frustration. This is where Penny’s scenes take up the rest of the episode. Getting Penny back in control of her own body and safe again is what makes the ending of the episode much brighter, when just 5 minutes before Ruby had been distraught and scared. This then spills over into the group coming up with the plan to use the staff, putting the main group in a much better mood. Of all the things to go right, it’s interesting that it’s Penny.

Things go wrong with the plan in the end and Penny dies. I find it interesting that once again, Penny got them hopeful in their chances of doing something right. Given said plan succeeded but at the cost of Penny of all people, Penny is shown to be the beginning and end of hope for them

The highest and lowest points for hope seem to directly correlate to when Penny’s around. When she comes back again, hope will return too, just like it had before. And because she’ll likely be back for good this time, the second return will probably be close to when Ruby is nearing the complete abandonment of hope. This would be pretty par for the course of the show honestly.

A little aside, but in a sense, Penny also represents Unity. The CCT in Vale fell after her first death, knocking out global communications and the unifying connection it gave. When it was restored for the briefest moment, she was there. Her body connected so she could allow for its launch, her soul lighting the night to hold up Amity with every ounce of her strength. So of course when the Hack succeeds and she falls, she takes global comms down again with her. At a smaller scale - even at the Hack's second last attempt to control her, she draws everyone in the Schnee Manor together. At the start of the volume, Yang states the one thing that they all agree on is not surrendering Penny.

Unity seems appropriate for one whose first song and wish was for but one friend, who would go on to find so many more in the process, and permit for a moment the possibility of all Remnant becoming friends once more. Where she first died, the name of the episode devoted to her story - Amity, "friendship", from the Latin root amicus, "friend" - she almost lives and dies with the very possibility of a united Remnant. It's no wonder she's a priority target for Salem, the great divider, and it seems natural that her next restoration may very well allow the next bid to bring the world together.

The Void Screams:

Moments after Penny's death, we hear a weird scream in the void space. It was a guttural, pained, angry scream, almost like the void space itself was crying out. All the portals shuddered and flickered when it happened.

Some think that this scream was Salem returning, but that happens earlier than Penny’s death, her return is signaled with cinder's arm acting up. We know this because after the arm finished flailing uncontrollably, Cinder said triumphantly "she's back." If it were Salem screaming, it would have happened after she fixed herself, but it didn't.

And I doubt Cinder would have been surprised or unsettled by it considering she was happy Salem returned not long before it. And why would a Salem scream affect the portals anyway, she has no connection to the staff or it's magic.

Another thing to consider is the fact sound is not transmitted through the portals. Otherwise, they would've heard Oscar and the rest calling for them, or the screams of the citizens of Mantle and Atlas. This lowers the possibility of that scream being from Salem even further.

The sound really seems to be coming from something else entirely within the void, and that something is not at all happy. There’s also the fact that Penny was the only person who died in the void space, everyone else was just thrown out of it like Ruby and Co. The only logical cause to me is Penny. Her body was a product (or byproduct) of the same creation magic that made the void space, her blood seems to have been a trigger.

Now I can't be sure about it, but this makes me feel like Penny is almost a part of creation itself? For whatever this thing is to be so angry, that is the only explanation I can think of currently. But all of this could possibly relate to the Narnia allusion of 'the willing victim killed in a traitor's stead' that others have brought up, which will be covered next.

Narnia Parallels:

Atlas has several parallels and references to fictional places (putting aside real world ones like the United States). One of those is that of Narnia, both on the surface and on a deeper level. It is a land of winter year round, where people struggle to survive and there is a present divide between those loyal to the current Monarch and those who are not. James is a parallel to Jadis, the White Witch, a ruler whose thoughts and cares aren’t exactly centered around the actual well being of the people. The hologram table in Ironwood’s office is designed to look like stone, like the Stone Table which features prominently in the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. He has a handpicked cadre of special agents/secret police, like how Maugrim and his wolves served Jadis. Another key parallel is how Jadis’s winter sets in to oppress and kill everyone in Narnia, but the Witch provides aid and protection to her loyal followers. She has all the power to spare harm to others, and uses it only for the loyal. As soon as Mantle splits from James and Atlas, no care is taken to protect them from the cold of Solitas even though he has every ability to turn the heating grid back on. His protection is only for the loyal.

Now that the parallel is established, let's look into the details. Starting with how James plays the role of Jadis.

"I had forgotten that you are only a common boy. How should you understand reasons of State? You must learn, child, that what would be wrong for you or for any of the common people is not wrong in a great Queen such as I. The weight of the world is on our shoulders. We must be freed from all rules. Ours is a high and lonely destiny." These are the words Jadis says in the Magician’s Nephew to justify the blood civil war she and her sister had waged for rulership of Charn, before she came to Narnia. She won that war, technically, but only after the last battle had been lost and her sister had marched right up to her so that they were face to face. Jadis’s troops were dead, her followers had surrendered, and the capital was under full control of her sister. But, she still had one card, one ultimate play to win and prove the throne of Charn was rightfully her. The Deplorable Word, a piece of old magic that killed everyone and everything except for her on Charn. It was monstrous, senseless, cruel beyond measure. But it got her that hollow victory. This mindset, the disregard for the people except as tools for her own will, the ultimate ‘aoe’ destructive move that no one had even considered her using, the unwillingness to stop even when by all practical measures the war is over, is a shocking parallel to James. In many ways, he is Jadis in mindset and deed.

Then there is the shared desire for A Thing that both James and Jadis have. For James it’s the Winter Maiden and control over her. For Jadis it’s the Silver Apples from the Tree of Youth. And funnily enough, the Maiden Powers parallel the Apples quiet well. These apples grant power and a life of eternal beauty, but should not be taken or eaten on one’s own initiative. They must be given, a gift granted by another, or only suffering will come from obtaining them. "For the fruit always works — it must work — but it does not work happily for any who pluck it at their own will. If any Narnian, unbidden, had stolen an apple and planted it here to protect Narnia, it would have protected Narnia. But it would have done so by making Narnia into another strong and cruel empire like Charn, not the kindly land I mean it to be.” Jadis’s immortality, and some of her power, come from the fact that she ate an Apple of her own will after stealing her way into the garden where the Tree of Youth had been planted. She gained the eternal life she had wanted and the power along with it, but she did so by taking it and was cursed because of it. Her skin turned pale and her lips blackened as if she were a frozen corpse given life. She will be trapped in a life of misery and hate according to Aslan- oh hey Cinder, how’s having stolen the Power you always wanted working out for you? Cinder had the power she wanted, but she only got hungrier, eager to claim more and increase her might. But in her pursuit she was defeated and humiliated by Raven, had to steal her way out of Mistral, and then suffered defeat after defeat while in Atlas. Only in the end, when she didn’t keep pursuing the Maiden Power, did she get any kind of victory.

The reason these parallels to Narnia are so important is one of the most famous events of the series. The cracking of the Stone Table and the rebirth of Aslan after his death. ‘When a willing victim who had committed no treachery was killed in a traitor's stead, the Table would crack and Death itself would start working backward.’ Well, the ‘Stone Table’ in James’s office has cracked, and Penny strikes me as a pretty willing victim. She has never actually committed any actual treachery or harm, as she was the Protector of Mantle, and fought for its and Atlas’s people until the very end. And because of her death, the actual traitor, Winter, who loyally served James until he had gone too far, was saved. Through Penny’s self sacrifice, Winter was saved. So now Death itself will start working backward.

(Major props to my friend @catontheweb for writing this section, I was getting nowhere with it, if they weren't there this part wouldn't exist!)

Norse Mythology:

The tree we see in the post credit scene gives off some serious Yggdrasil vibes. Also called the World Tree, it is essentially all of creation in Norse Mythology. It connects all nine realms, including the God realms of Asgard, the human realm of Midgard, and the underworld of Hel.

Humans are born from the branches of Yggdrasil. The web of Wyrd is woven for every person once they're born, and their path is set from there regardless of how many times the souls cycle over. But at the end, they're destined to end up in one of the worlds, for a myriad of reasons.

I believe Penny landed closest to this giant tree. She was on the center platform in the void space, so if that space is directly above the island(?) the tree is on, it makes sense for her to fall by the center nearest to the tree. This would not only open up all kinds of possibilities for the volume in general, but it would also create options for Penny.

The whole of Yggdrasil’s representations fit well into Penny’s story. Birth, growth, death and rebirth. We can count Penny’s appearance in V7 as birth for now, her growth is all her development in leaving =the military and becoming a Maiden, her death just happened, and her rebirth would be her revival. And this is a cycle she’s gone through before.

The Norse god Odin and Yggdrasil have quite a connection. In one story, Odin cut out one of his own eyes to gain knowledge from a pool underneath Yggdrasil. The only one that fell whose eyes alone are incredibly significant to the story was Ruby. So, they could choose to have her allude to Odin by having Ruby make some kind of deal with whatever entity likely rules over this magical place. An eye for Penny’s life.

There’s another story about Odin, Yggdrasil and the pursuit of knowledge. Odin so loved knowledge, that he sacrificed himself in a quest to learn the deeper magic of runes. It was believed one could only learn the magic spells from runes in death. So, Odin hung himself on Yggdrasil for nine days as an offering, and teetered between life and death. After he mastered the last spell on the ninth night, he ritually died and all light was extinguished from the world. Odin’s death lasted until midnight, when he was reborn and light returned to the world.

This story doesn’t fit Penny perfectly, but allusions often don’t. So If she really did land near the tree, she could be another loose representation of Odin’s story here. What she did wasn’t for knowledge, but to save her friends and keep Cinder from getting the Winter Maiden power. She believed it necessary that she sacrifice herself to achieve this end. As we established, Penny represents Hope, so her death means the loss of hope. This parallels Odin’s story of his death meaning the loss of light itself. So if this theory holds up, it would make this death temporary, until her rebirth and the return of Hope with her once again.

Alternatively, Ruby has the potential of loosely representing Odin in this story as well. Odin later uses the knowledge of the runes to do many things, but the most relevant one right now is awakening the dead. Both of these stories are about making a personal sacrifice to gain something that is desired. Ruby would absolutely make such sacrifices if it meant saving Penny.

It is said that Odin lived “according to his highest will unconditionally, accepting whatever hardships arise from that pursuit, and allowing nothing, not even death, to stand between him and the attainment of his goals." This sounds like Penny's arc of accepting the WM powers. This is more just a general connection between Penny and Odin, but I found it interesting.

Side Note: I encourage anyone who’s interested to look into RWBY connections to Norse Myth, there’s a surprising amount of things that feel eerily similar to the show. Likely just coincidental, but it’s fun to think about!

(If I got any of this wrong, I sincerely apologize by the way. I researched as best I could, but I admit it could have been lacking.)

Ambrosius and the Staff:

Ruby told Ambrosius "we kinda wanna keep her around longer than that" as part of her very specific instructions. Then Penny died about ten to fifteen minutes, at the absolute most thirty minutes later in-universe. I don’t know about you, but to me that seems very short to be considered ‘longer than that’. Technically it is, but when writing a story and a character says something like that, you typically don’t just kill the character they were referring to basically right away. It makes sense for a week-by-week watch, but in a volume binge, which many viewers do, it becomes ironic how fast Penny dies after being removed from her robotic body.

The first time we see the staff of creation being used, it's to save Penny. Using the staff of creation to help Penny is a sign of how incredibly important she is.

They’ve even got this entire transformation sequence for her, so it wouldn’t make sense for them to throw all that away two episodes later. In a meta context, it’s a massive waste of time and budget considering the asset creation for Penny.

Penny is a character who has already hopped bodies two times. And now we're supposed to just believe that this time it really is a final death? Just two episodes after we were explicitly told her body isn't what matters, that "Her soul is who she is" and that "the mechanical parts are just extra"? From a writing perspective, it feels strange, like your breaking a promise right after making it. And frankly, CRWBY is better than that, which makes me think this is not the actual end for her.

A possible connection between Penny, Ruby, and the Staff (thus Creation) can be seen in the intro. As Ruby is falling and being dragged down into the darkness, she is shown reaching for the staff. In the void space, Penny is the one with the relic. So with Penny having this strong connection to Creation, and the lyrics “fight for every life” playing as Ruby reaches for the staff, it’s a safe assumption to make, with the knowledge we now have, that the Staff of Creation represents Penny in this particular moment. Which could mean that V9 will be about, at least partially, fighting for Penny’s life.

Musical Hints:

In terms of music, Friend, as a song for Penny, is very dissonant from the episode itself. The song is oddly cheerful for Penny’s recent untimely death, and it overall highlights the wrong parts of death. It’s simply too happy to be a song about losing one of the most, if not the most joyous characters in the entire show. The song also abruptly ends. There’s no outro, and while this could symbolize the fact that Penny died young, it could be that the song itself is unfinished in a story sense.

What do we hear just before the song finishes, though? A progression of notes that sounds eerily similar to the last line of the opening of Volume 8. The notes for “Fight for ev’ry life” and “Who fin’lly felt alive'' share a similar melodic structure, they aren’t perfect clones of each other, but they are incredibly similar, to the point where it seems intentional. Penny may very well be the life that the opening song is fighting for. It is also worth noting that the line “Fight for every life” comes just after “Sometimes it’s worth it all to risk the fall,” which is the exact wording used for the description in the Volume 8 finale. Team RWBY risked the fall, yet, strangely the opposite of fighting for every life happened with Penny’s sacrifice. Perhaps the time to fight for every life has yet to happen, and we will see it come Volume 9.

For another thing, the lyrics for Friend are entirely centered on Penny’s feelings for Ruby, to the point where they read very much like a bittersweet love song. The music itself is incredibly cheerful, as mentioned previously, creating a mood whiplash with the end of the volume. Why would we hear a song about Penny’s feelings for Ruby, sounding like a love song, if her death is supposed to be a tragic sacrifice akin to Pyrrha’s? The song may very well be giving a clue into its future use in the show proper.

If this was meant to be a good bye song, why make it so cheerful and romantic sounding? There's only one part about her dying and even then, it's just too accepting and goes right back into cheerfulness. The song is also pretty hopeful, telling Penny's story in a fairly chronological order. And the part where she talks about sacrifice is quite pointedly followed up by one about feeling alive. It also ends with the super cheerful chorus, the word "alive" being the last... (Remember the episode title: The Final Word)

(I want to thank my friend @shadow-0f-x for writing the majority of this section! I was struggling to choose how to tackle it as I am not well versed in music theory.)

What We Didn’t See:

It is likely that Penny understood Jaune's semblance better than him and figured something out about it’s abilities in the same way that she understood Ruby's semblance better than her. She had plenty of time to observe his semblance up close as he boosted her aura to stave off the virus. Because of that intentionally timed cutaway in the finale, we don’t get to hear her explain herself after her strained “Trust me.” All of that seems really suspicious to me.

Pyrrha Parallel:

Pyrrha and Penny both sacrificed themselves to stop or stall Cinder. Jaune tried to convince the both of them to stop. With Pyrrha, he failed, while with Penny he actively helped her sacrifice herself. Doesn’t make sense for the guy who was determined not to let anyone else do what Pyrrha did, unless of course Penny assured him she’d be alright.

The Moment:

RT including the suicide hotline in the description shows that they're aware that Penny basically committed assisted suicide, seeing it as a noble sacrifice worth doing to save her friends. They're aware, and I believe they're smart enough to condemn that decision to hell and back.

The best way to do that in my opinion is to pull her back into the land of the living and let her witness first hand the consequences of throwing her life away so freely. This would show Penny how her actions affected others so maybe she could learn to truly value herself. To not think herself expendable. It would be bold and unwise to portray this choice as something good, unless it was going to be called upon later and be pointed out for how horrible it really is.

On top of this, Penny was way too content with her death, happy even. There's no way team RWBY is letting her stay content with it. It’s almost as though we're supposed to join Ruby and Co. in calling bullshit on what Penny is saying and doing because no, Penny, this is not how things are meant to work. It's as if Penny was basically saying "I want to die for my friends" because most of the volume had been about everyone else making sure she didn't die. She knows it will hurt them. She knows.

At the peak of it all, a choice like this will totally destroy Ruby. It may very well be her breaking point for Volume 9. Curiously, the moment itself is written like it’s the first choice Penny’s ever made, yet the entire Volume shows this isn’t the case. However, this is the first choice that Penny’s made solely independently and it’s rather pertinent that the choice she makes is a mistake. Outside of giving Winter the Maiden gift and saving the day temporarily, this sacrifice will not have any lasting positive effects. Jaune will be saddled with the grief of killing Penny. Ruby will have to live with losing her best friend and not being able to protect her a second time, and Winter now has the burden of the Winter Maiden abilities, making her a target of Cinder. This is a bad thing, and Penny needs to see the long term consequences.

Transfer of Power:

As we all know, colors in RWBY are really important and get a lot of focus in the show. That means the yellow we see as Penny gives Winter the Maiden Powers was intentional and likely important, no matter how insignificant it may seem. It’s possible that the transfer effect being yellow could have something to do with Jaune’s semblance. When Fria gave the power to Penny, the effect was very much blue, so this transfer should have been green since she was the one giving it this time. The weirdness of this transfer and the focus on color in RWBY really makes it look like something’s up with how that went down.

A little off topic, but Penny saying "I won't be gone, I'll be part of you." makes me think... Winter is smart, so when she gets time to think about what Penny said, maybe she'll arrive at the same question many in the audience came to; if she's literally part of Winter, can they be separated again? If Winter starts questioning that, the possibility of Penny coming back just skyrockets.

Fria actually tells Penny "I'll be gone" before giving her powers up, which is an interesting contrast to Penny telling Winter "I won't be gone". She may have gotten that line from Winter be all philosophical in V7, saying Fria was now a part of Penny, but it hits differently coming from an actual Maiden. S5o it’s possible that Maidens usually actually will be gone, but Jaune's semblance did something to change that.

This could go well with the theory that they won't need to find an aura transfer machine, or build another one, because Jaune will have a semblance evolution allowing him to do the transfer instead. It might actually be that this evolution already happened and the golden light we saw was Jaune transferring penny's aura to Winter in some way?

An observation that I find interesting is when Penny gives winter the powers, not only is the aura yellow but penny completely glows yellow too, and she obviously starts to disappear, but she doesn’t seem to fully disappear, she just glows.

It's possibly a fading out effect and she does fully fade but animation makes bright light easier, and so we don't actually see her disappear because she's dead and not gone. But it does once again emphasize the color yellow here!

And the color is coming from Penny, it does go up Winter's arm a bit, but Penny is clearly the source. This transfer is so weird and I’m not really sure how to interpret it. There's just actually no reason that we are aware of to make the effect yellow here is the thing. Unless it has something to do with either Jaune or Ambrosius, or potentially a combination of both...

Jaune’s Aura:

The way we see Jaune's aura break in the finale is strange. His aura shouldn't be breaking here. It had been long enough since he was boosting Penny, he's had time to recharge, and it didn't look like it was a strain on him at all. Plus, we know he has a lot of aura, so there probably wasn't too much to recharge in the first place.

He has a massive amount of aura, it has never broken before as far as I remember. Even if it has though, that doesn’t make this occurrence any less odd. It should absolutely never be a one-hit KO. We didn't see anything that would've drained it, that should not have been enough to break his aura. Unless he did something - something that would require a huge amount of aura - that we just didn't see. That amount of aura drain is far more than just an attempt at healing would do, Jaune absolutely did something with his semblance that took up almost all of his aura.

Pinocchio Allusion:

As any Penny fan knows, her character allusion is Pinocchio, the puppet who became a real boy. Penny deviates from the allusion by having always been a real girl, as Ruby is quick to point out, but she shares many story beats with her original story including multiple deaths. In the original story, Pinocchio dies from being hung by his own strings due to his poor decision making and he dies. Sounds a little familiar, does it not? This is where his tale originally ended. Readers were unsatisfied with this ending however, so the author decided to change the story by reviving Pinocchio and teaching him to be more careful.

Unlike Pinocchio making all the wrong decisions, Penny often makes the right ones, or ones she thinks is right, when concerning others. While usually a good thing, this has meant Penny almost giving herself up multiple times during V8, her last attempt being successful. This is where Penny and Pinocchio begin to share similarities again. They are both very reckless when it concerns themselves. This carelessness comes from different places, but it ends with the same result of them endangering their lives and even sometimes losing them.

In the Disney movie, Pinocchio dies by drowning after going to rescue Geppetto and washes up on the shore (like the beach in V8’s post credit scene). His father is devastated and takes him home to grieve, but as a reward for his selflessness in rescuing his father, the Blue Fairy returns and brings him back to life, as well as granting him humanity. Penny sacrificed her life as well, and it stands to reason that she should be rewarded for it, much like her allusion was.

Penny got her maiden powers from someone with blue aura and then gave her powers to someone with blue aura. So it could be that not only Ambrosius, but Fria and Winter as well represent the Blue Fairy. It could be set up for Winter helping to bring Penny back to life once more. It’s an out there theory I admit, but it’s not outright impossible either. The Blue Fairy in Pinocchio saved him three times that I know of, so RWBY having three representations does make sense.

Geppetto wished for him to live as a real boy, but it depended on what path Pinocchio took. This is very reminiscent of Penny and Pietro. Pietro wants to see her live her life, and surely with him absent in V8C14 that didn't work, despite Penny choosing. Her father did not see her happy enough to live her life, and will only be able to learn her death through others. But Pinocchio's themes were life and being alive. So the likelihood that this is not her end yet is quite high!

A Girl That Fell Through the World:

Penny could be the girl who fell through the world. The girl in the story fled the consequences of a choice. The only person who chose her ultimate fate was Penny. The others were pushed into the void, but she chose to die. The consequence of her choice is Ruby’s grief first and foremost, which Penny won’t see. The girl who fell through the world does come back though, and the world will be changed severely with Penny’s absence. Alternatively, it could also be Penny coming back to Wonderland or wherever they currently are, as long as it’s unrecognizable to her.

What Returning Brings:

Others might say another return would have no story relevant purpose, but I wholeheartedly disagree. Penny gives a profoundly youthful, joyous, and wondrous outlook on the world and story that we hadn't seen since Ruby in Volumes 1-3(not the end), Penny returning would bring a much needed levity back in after the despair they will undoubtedly be going through. While not necessarily a huge thing in most other shows, for RWBY, a show largely about keeping up hope, an ounce of such relief is a necessity.

As much as I hate saying it, Penny’s death does actually make some narrative sense because she had to pass on the Maiden powers. (They could have done this in a number of ways, and I personally think they chose rather poorly, but I digress.) Throughout this whole volume, we can see Penny seemingly being set up to join the main cast, but would have been too strong with the powers. This also accomplishes ridding her of the burden of responsibility that comes with being a Maiden and lets her obtain the freedom that’s so important to her character.

Once she returns, seeing this grief that her actions caused, particularly to Ruby, will get her to realize more that her actions can have serious repercussions. She made a choice, but that choice hurt the people she loves. She must have known that it would but I’m not sure she ever realized just how much.

I didn’t want this post to be heavy in the shipping department, so I largely left it out, but I am going to say this one thing that could have an impact. If Nuts & Dolts is on its way to being canon, which this volume makes it feel highly likely, this could be a catalyst.

It could prompt an arc for the both of them in which Penny learns to live her life fighting for her loved ones, rather than sacrificing it for them. A relationship could potentially start from there. And Ruby seeing Penny learn these things may also help her to stop doing the occasional but very dangerous and reckless things she does. Ruby witnessing Penny coming to terms with what she did to the people that care about her would actually make her stop to think “wait, is this how everyone else would feel if I got myself killed?” That would be a very important moment of character growth for her.

I’m certain there are other significant things that Penny returning can bring to the show. And there are definitely more sections I could add to this. At this point though, assuming anyone even made it this far, I think I’ve been going long enough already. So let’s just roll into the outro!

As painful and hopeless as it seems, I'm choosing to trust them with this because there is absolutely no way they didn't see backlash coming. The way this finale went makes me think that they calculated for backlash and aren’t jumping into something they don’t have a plan to recover from. Whether this trust is unfounded or not remains to be seen, but I don’t think it is currently. I do think, however, that the cause of this backlash was a major misstep. Now that it has happened though, they have a chance to do something good with it.

I know for a lot of you, trust in CRWBY has been damaged, some even irreparably so. And for those that feel this way, I don’t blame you. My trust in them took a hit too, but isn’t broken completely yet. There are many ways that they can bring her back that would make sense with the narrative, they have the ability to make it right, and after going over all of the hints and general weirdness of things many times, I think they will.

I'm feeling pretty confident now and I really didn't expect that to happen at all to be honest. But discussing and theorizing with the discord server seriously helped get my hopes back up surprisingly fast! It’s actually thanks to all of them that this gigantic post even happened! So thanks a ton my fellow Dolts! And a special thanks to!!

@arcana-amicus

@catontheweb

@cosmokyrin

@gaydontmesswithme224

@jammatown919

@shadow-0f-x

They really helped get this thing across the finish line!

And thank YOU for reading all~ of this! I sincerely wish it gave you some of the hope and confidence that I now have!

[beevean]

I might become annoying with my Shadow game questions as I love that game. What is your favourite and least favourite mission(s)?

Are you kidding me? Have you seen how many times I've gushed about this dumb game? Please ask me all of your questions <3

Favorite mission:

concept-wise, Circus Park Hero, because it's by far the most unique and the whole level feels the most Sonic-y. I adore the idea of the shooting gallery, because it implements the weapons so well! And unlike Casino Park Chaotix, 400 Rings are very easy to both pick up and keep, as you only lose 10 Rings when hit. And the level itself is by far the best looking (maybe too bloomy) :)

generally speaking, Air Fleet Dark, which is also my second favorite level overall behind the similar G.U.N. Fortress. Easily the best "destroy the flying ship" mission, the level just throws at you super powerful weapons, it's so easy to stay in Dark Chaos mode meaning constant invincibility and infinite ammo, and there are some engaging platforming sections, including some that may be the earliest instance of 2.5D in the series! (well you still have full 3D control which is a little cumbersome, but it's easy to get the hang of it) I also like the look of the sunset outside, poor Tails is terrified that it might be the last time he'll see it :( my only gripe with Air Fleet is that it has easily my least favorite track in the game.

Least favorite mission: Mad. Matrix. Dark.

Oh sure, Lost Impact Hero is infamous. Lost Impact Hero wants you to kill 35 of the most resilient and annoying enemies in the game, and it wants you to use those slow, clunky G.U.N. Lifts, and the level is a maze, and god help you if you miss/forget one of those assholes, I know all of that.

But. You can pull on a map on the internet, roughly get the feel of the location of the Artificial Chaos, and subsequently have an easier time, because you remember which rooms are a dead end, and how many AC you have killed by a certain checkpoint, and it's not fun, but it's manageable.

(yes I'm keeping tabs of my ShTH playthroughs. please don't judge me)

This is how many times I've completed LI Hero as of today. I'm almost done with it! I can go through this stage like a breeze (well, it still takes roughly 8 minutes), and enjoy the lovely music :)

This is how many times I've completed Mad Matrix Dark. Those 6 times are the most pain this game has ever given me in 16 years since I got it.

The main problems of that mission are that:

the circuit is extremely convoluted, complete with dead ends in certain parts;

the colors are garish and even nauseous, making orienting yourself even harder;

you go at high speeds and can't turn back easily if you miss a turn - a problem that doesn't exist in Lost Impact, since you can move at your own speed and checkpoints help you teleport;

draw distance? Is that something you eat?

sometimes the camera bugs out and assumes a top down view! And this is easily the worst part! Because maps of the circuit exist, but I can't follow them, because sometimes the game is like "no fuck you get lost", literally!

Also the music is mediocre. Let me tell you, 15 minutes straight of this is maddening. It's a fairly short loop to boot!

Cosmic Fall, both missions, are a somewhat close second - the missions themselves are super easy, literally "get to the Goal Ring" and "go further"... I just don't like the stage in itself and I dread reaching it. Good thing that unlocking the secret door means you pretty much gain an autowin button for the Hero Mission, but you still have to go through those awful, slow platforming sections :\

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Texts from the Lost Tomb, part 5.2

Also yes this is a 5 part story arc, why do you ask, no I’m not “avoiding real life work”

Main Chat

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW THERE ARE THOSE WHO WOULD COMPLAIN ABOUT BEING DRAGGED OUT OF BED AT AN UNGODLY HOUR FOR THE SAKE OF SOME JEWELRY AND FORCED INTO AN ADVENTURE

Wu Xie: And we are just so grateful you are above all that.

Zhang Qiling: You were fully awake and insisted we pack and go as soon as possible in case there was, and I quote, “more weird shit happening we can cash in on.”

Wu Xie: I mean it’s kind of interesting that the Zhang family sent a car for us. We could have driven. So what is going on there, I wonder?

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW FOR A PARANOID AND CONNIVING LITTLE SHIT YOU STILL RADIATE OBLIVIOUS BAMBI ENERGY

HATE TO BE THE ADMIRAL ACKBAR HERE BUT ITS DEF A TRAP MY BOY

WHY DO U THINK WE ARE MESSAGING AND NOT TALKING DUMMY

WERE YOU IN A TOMB ON THE DAY THEY TAUGHT PPL STRANGER DANGER

BUT NO NO YOU WERE ALL “LETS GET IN THE VAN WITH THE FREE CANDY AND PUPPIES I BET WE’RE GOING TO THE CIRCUS”

THIS IS THE LAST STRAW IM LOJACKING YOU FOR REAL THIS TIME, SHOULDVE DONE THIS YEARS AGO

Zhang Qiling: I agree, in this particular case, with Pangzi. You should not have gotten in their vehicle while we were still inside the house. It forced us to follow you into the van to prevent separation, and they seemed to be expecting that. I don’t know whether Zhang Rishan intended this, but I don’t trust him.

Wu Xie: :( I got excited and didn’t think it through. I’m sorry.

Wang Pangzi: DONT YOU GIVE US THE BIG EYES WE ARE IMMUNE

MOSTLY

SPEAKING OF IMMUNE ITS REALLY FUCKIN COLD IN HERE AND UR STILL SICK, PUT YOUR JACKET ON STUPID

Wu Xie: oh relax, I’m fine. No fever at all today, remember? I feel a lot better, too.

Wang Pangzi: YOU LEAVE ME NO CHOICE BUT TO HAVE XIAO GE INTERVENE

Zhang Qiling: It is odd to say this, but Pangzi is right again. You are barely back on your feet and could easily get worse again. Wu Xie. Jacket. Now.

Wu Xie: Oh fine. Teaming up on me, I see. Happy now?

Wang Pangzi: FUCKING ECSTATIC. NOW BACK TO HOW WE MAY BE PULLING A LI CU

Wu Xie: If it is an abduction, it wouldn’t be them moving against the whole Wu family—not with Uncle Erbai in charge. Zhang Rishan strikes me as someone who doesn’t make a move unless he is sure of his plan, and this is all a bit last-minute to be a big shift. Besides, they let Xiao Ge keep his sword and we still have all our phones.

Wang Pangzi: TOOK AWAY MY EXPLOSIVES THO THE BASTARDS

Zhang Qiling: In fairness, you were waving them around and yelling that if they tried anything it was going to be “yippeekiyay motherfucker all up in this bitch.”

Wang Pangzi: IT SOUNDS LESS COOL COMING FROM YOU. I THINK I SEE THE TEAHOUSE?

Wu Xie: me too. That’s Zhang Rishan on the steps. This must be urgent. Everybody stay shiny.

Zhang Qiling: I will be getting out first. Wu Xie in the middle, Pangzi at the rear.

Wang Pangzi: AND WHAT A VIEW;)

An hour later…

Main Chat

Wu Xie: Is everyone okay? I tried knocking but nothing is getting through, these are some solid walls.

Wu Xie: guys???

Wang Pangzi: OOPS PHONE WAS ON SILENT AND I WAS BUSY YELLING AT THE CEILING

IM PRESENT AND PISSED OFF

Zhang Qiling: Apologies, I was trying to break down the door.

Wang Pangzi: SO THIS MAY NOT BE THE TIME TO SAY I TOLD YOU SO BUT WHILE WE’RE HERE

Wu Xie: fuck Pangzi, I know, okay??

I’m an idiot, I’m so fucking stupid. It’s not like it’s the first or fiftieth time I’ve put you two in danger, either.

Wang Pangzi: HEY HEY WHOA NOW

STOP SAYING RUDE SHIT ABOUT MY FRIEND

ITS GONNA BE OKAY

DESPITE KNOWING THIS WAS A BAD IDEA I STILL COULDNT PREDICT HOW MUCH CHAOTIC LUCK THIS FAMILY HAS

DAMN IT I HATE WHEN HEI XIAZI IS RIGHT ABOUT THINGS

Zhang Qiling: I’m sorry. This is my fault. My line has a ruthlessly pragmatic streak and they’ve clearly wanted to test us separately to see why the necklace reacted to our arrival like that. It does not excuse Zhang Rishan trapping us in these separate rooms.

Wang Pangzi: UHH BITCH I SAID THIS FAMILY NOT YOUR FAMILY

THIS AINT ABOUT THEM

YOUR FAMILY IS ON MY SHIT LIST EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY

THIS FAMILY MEANT US OBVS

UGH ANY SIGN OF THE BASTARDS?

Zhang Qiling: no. Wu Xie?

Zhang Qiling: Wu Xie, answer me.

Wang Pangzi: WU XIE

TIANZHEN

PICK UP YOUR FUCKING PHONE DAMNIT YOU'RE SCARING XIAOGE

Zhang Qiling: I’m going to try breaking down the door again.

Wu Xie: Hello, Wang Pangzi and Zhang Qiling. My apologies for the rather inhospitable circumstances, but this seemed expedient considering the unknown qualities of the necklace. I could not be sure who was causing what, or what could happen next, and thus have temporarily set you in separate rooms for the sake of everyone’s safety.

Wang Pangzi: WTF GIVE HIM BACK HIS FUCKIN PHONE ZHANG RISHAN I KNOW ITS YOU YOU PRETENTIOUS ANTIQUE

WE DESTROYED THIS PLACE BEFORE AND WE CAN DO IT AGAIN

Zhang Qiling: Your concerns for everyone’s safety are noted. Thank you for whatever you believe you’ve done right here.

Now. If you release us immediately and return Wu Xie to us, we will consider leaving without direct personal retribution.

Wang Pangzi: WHAT HE SAID AND ALSO YOU SUCK

Wu Xie: I regret that this has happened, I hope to make it up to you in the future. For the purpose of today’s needs, however—I will have my men escort the two of you out if you so desire, but unfortunately Wu Xie will need to stay until we have finished examining him.

Wang Pangzi: EXAMINING??? YOU FUCKING PERV HANDS OFF HE MAY BE THE BELLE OF THE BALL BUT HIS DANCE CARD IS SPOKEN FOR

I SWEAR I DID NOT GO THROUGH TEN YEARS OF THIS STARCROSSED CLUSTERFUCK FOR YOU TO SWOOP IN AND STEAL MY FRIENDS BF

Wu Xie: There is no call for rudeness. He will not be harmed. The artifact was responding to him directly. It has not lit up like this in over 200 years, and I need to understand why it is responding, and responding to someone who is not our kin, which it has never done before. This could have implications for everyone in my family if it could protect someone at the right moment.

Wang Pangzi: OKAY BUT CONSIDERING OUR TRACK RECORD IN THIS BUILDING AND THE SITUATION AT HAND Y’ALL ARE ABOUT TO NEED PROTECTION

Wu Xie: The testing would be going better if Wu Xie wasn’t worrying himself unnecessarily over where you both are, it’s making our readings difficult.

Wang Pangzi: OH GEE SO SORRY YOUR KIDNAPPING VICTIMS ARENT THRILLED TO BE HERE TO SAMPLE YOUR CREEPY JEWELRY BOX BUT THAT SOUNDS LIKE A YOU PROBLEM

Zhang Qiling: Zhang Rishan. I appreciate that you must think of our family first in your decisions. As must I. I hope you can appreciate what that means for decisions I make.

Wang Pangzi: HEHEHE SO TRUE BESTIE

YOU PISSED OFF THE WRONG GOTH TODAY BUDDY BOY

Zhang Qiling: A compromise: we stay with him as you run your tests. That will calm him and assuage Pangzi’s concerns and prevent me from…testing the limits of your lifespan.

Wu Xie: I accept that this may temporarily impact our relations, but am hopeful that you will come to understand that sometimes I need to make certain choices for this family that are…difficult. I will come to let you—One moment. Something seems to be happening.

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: OH SO WE ARE GONNA JUST POLITELY SIT WITH WU XIE AS STRANGERS POKE HIM WITH NEEDLES ARE WE HUH WELL LOOK WHOS BEING A HELPFUL LITTLE LAB ASSISTANT

Zhang Qiling: I’m attempting to convince him to let us out. Of course we will not simply sit there. Some lying to gain trust is necessary here.

Wang Pangzi: UR BEIN A SHADY BITCH XIAOGE AND ITS HOT

THATS WHY YOUR TATTOO IS SO BIG ITS FULL OF SECRETS

ALWAYS KNEW YOU HAD IT IN YOU TO—WAIT WHAT WAS THAT SOUND??

At the same time…

Bonnie and Clyde Chat

Xie Yuchen: …so, this is not what I expected to find.

Hei Yangjing: yeah kiddo is a bit freaked out:/ this sucks. I mean I get that they are concerned blah blah blah necklace goes brightbright but maybe we should go find the other two

or at least find a way to let Wu Xie know we are here, that room he’s in looks like a dungeon and not in a good way

Xie Yuchen: Does it look like I’m able to do anything right now? Also, I’m fairly certain they won’t be harmed. Zhang Rishan may be callous, but he isn’t stupid.

Hei Yangjing: r u kidding

he split up Romeo and Juliet, then left Romeo with a sword—seems pretty stupid to me

Xie Yuchen: Yeah I’m not going near that. He made his bed with that choice. What can you see? These Neanderthal guards are blocking my view.

Hei Yangjing: uh so there’s like a lab table situation

Wu Xie isn’t tied up, a good sign in this context

I can’t see what those people are holding, they’re talking a lot and some asshole just grabbed Wu Xie’s arm, looks like maybe they are putting in an IV?

The necklace is—oh. Oh shit.

[ashesandhalefire]

would love to hear your complicated feelings on the michael/sanders scene in context!

okay so this is messy because my thoughts are still a little all over the place, but the issues i had were specifically with the new power reveal, and they were basically 1) the way they've handled the pod squad gaining new abilities, and 2) the decision to give michael in particular this ability and backstory

i wish the reasoning was more nuanced and meaningful but a lot of it is just "i don't vibe with this" and "i think it's dumb" lmao

so i'm starting to get less and less impressed with how they're rolling out this "aliens can have more than one skill" idea. sometimes the concept comes across as Very Sexy but the execution less so. i wanted to actually see them learning these new skills. i wanted to see them tutoring each other and practicing and doing stuff wrong and getting frustrated and feeling weird trying to learn powers that are different from the ones that have been a part of them for their whole lives. but isobel's telekinesis was really the only new skill that got any screen time, and i think michael was only sort of grudgingly there for one scene of it. healing hasn't been mentioned (to my recollection?), and mindscape practice has been mostly off-screen and it seemed more about deflection in case they were pulled into jones's mindscape and less about learning to influence people. and now it's starting to feel like we're just sort of rolling out new full-fledged abilities left and right. like, there are really only three or so, but it feels like oprah is behind the scenes going YOU GET A POWER AND YOU GET A POWER and doesn't feel as organic as i'd like it to feel. and at least reading auras and telepathy have mindscape vibes and feel like natural extensions of that power. but why is firebending now a whole new subset of powers? what are the limits of these alien abilities? how many more undiscovered powers are there? and that's not even mentioning the proficiency with swords. that feels like a decently unique kind of weapon to fight with, but it doesn't require any practice. we just dig that sucker up and the spirit of mom says "fuck 'em up, girlie." who cares if jones has been fighting with it for decades (centuries? i'm unclear on the length of this guy's life lol). he's not good enough to beat a really motivated novice. anyway! now we're saying that michael has secretly been able to jump into heads and control people for ten years but he doesn't use the power because he's terrified that it makes him evil and his siblings will be disgusted with him. and despite the fact that he hasn't practiced this power in ten years, a large part of the "beat the bad guy" plan hinges on his being able to overpower jones's control of the sheriff, meaning that the incident at eighteen isn't being looked at as a fluke when a new power manifests. we're just assuming michael has this fully developed mind control ability lying dormant in his brain. we lay out that michael did this thing, redefined his whole life by this new trauma, and, after a quick pep talk with his pseudo-dad, has processed his fears of his inherent evil enough to confess to his siblings and subject himself to using the power. all in like six minutes of screen time. and his siblings are entirely unaffected by this. they're not like... what??? you lied about a secret power for years??? they're just like [PSA voice, mentor putting a hand on mentee's shoulder] you could never be bad, michael. we love you. and then he DOESN'T EVEN DO IT. he just hops into the mindscape like anyone else could've done and says "pls don't shoot my friends :(" and the sheriff says okay and stops "letting" jones control her. why was this a good way to roll out this new power??? so the whole point of the reveal that michael has this mind control power apparently didn't even have anything to do with the sheriff subplot because he didn't actually use this power to resolve that problem. for now - until it comes back again, which based on some of the other subplots this season is not a guarantee - it was just to heap more trauma on his shoulders and legitimize this "woe is me, i'm a horrible monster!!" yarn they keep trying to spin without actually showing him do anything Truly Bad or Mildly Morally Gray. the sanders conversation is a rehashing of the alex convo from earlier where someone has to insist to michael that his genetics don't make him inherently evil. and the alex one was more effective for me because it was in the immediate aftermath of this massive revelation about who his father was AND michael

thought he was about to get murdered. he was spinning out. but having it happen again like eight episodes later - after michael still hasn't actually done anything to lend some legitimacy to his fears that his bloodline is Unavoidably Evil - doesn't have the same emotional impact. the worst things michael has ever done with his powers were shown back in the first half of s1, and he's be almost entirely reformed since then. so to set up whatever michael/jones showdown must be coming our way, we get the introduction of this ability that michael has never even so much as hinted at having before, and we get the reveal that it has colored how he looks at himself since he was eighteen. what. michael saying that his religious extremist family tried to perform an exorcism on him and couldn't and dallas inferring that he started to believe he was the demon was a good exchange. we already knew about that incident, but michael played it off as no big deal during 1x06. the new conversation helps him to relate to dallas, finds them some common ground, establishes trust, and makes the true emotional depth of what happened to michael explicit. having michael redefine all of his emotional struggles for the last ten years through the lens of "actually i found out that i have the same ability as the alien that possessed my sister and made her kill three girls in front of me, and it has made me view myself as fundamentally evil since that day" is such a bad rewrite of his history. was the history of horribly abusive foster homes insufficient in explaining michael's self-worth issues? was being the victim of a hate crime not enough trauma? was the witnessing and covering up of two separate murders that derailed his entire academic future not enough to make michael question his own goodness or value? why would it be necessary to add this mind control element to really make him feel bad about stuff?

and if ANYONE was going to get a story that dealt with struggles with consent and mental control, why was it not isobel?? why was it not that holding the turquoise enhanced her abilities and enabled her to control people, and she was TERRIFIED of that because of noah?? her consent was violated horribly, and she has struggled horribly with respecting the consent of others. this needed to be her ability to develop and deal with! giving it to michael fully developed also feels like a very handwavey, last minute choice. if this was planned from the beginning, why is this the first that the audience has heard about it? he says he never mentioned it because of isobel, which explains why isobel and max don't know about it. but why doesn't the audience know about it? in s1, michael is adamant that liz leave town. if isobel couldn't get her to go, why didn't michael sneak off and make her leave? why didn't he force her to forget (if that's within the purview of the power)? sure, he doesn't like having this power. but he's also more than willing to sacrifice himself for his siblings. wouldn't a little unethical behavior be worth saving them from experimentation? also if michael has been able to force people to do things all along, where was that energy when alex got kidnapped? why is torturing flint in a basement less inherently evil than just compelling him to tell the truth or compelling helena to let alex and charlie go? i know not everything can be planned from the beginning. but there was no reason this power had to be written like this. it didn't have to be something michael knew he had. but they chose to insert it into his history, and i feel like that was a bad call. - positives about the scene dad!sanders supremacy michael needs a dad figure who's like "you're a good person, you dumbass" and straight up LAUGHS at his assertion that he's evil.

[kaizen-design-studio]

TOO MUCH INFORMATION, VERY LESS TIME – MAKING AN UNFORGETTABLE VIDEO

There will always be a scenario when a corporate client tells a video production company to make a corporate video for them in only two minutes. Given the number of huge projects they have undertaken, it seems difficult.

There are huge assets to be shown and a lot of information to be conveyed. Here lies the problem. Including every piece of information can have a negative effect. As the human mind has limits, grasping too much information can result in less recall value. A lot of information can be tempting, and making an excellent video conveying each piece can be easier, but this may impact negatively on the company. There are some misconceptions that make the corporate video forgettable and boring. Let’s shade a light on some of them.

Misconception 1: More information equals to more value.

We may be driven by a conception that offering more information through video would provide more value. Turns out, this is a misconception. Studies show that people can remember the only handful of points out of a video. So, instead of conveying 10 points, convey only 5. The best way to do this to determine the priorities and which points can be focused on to make the maximum impact. Moreover, focus on emotional engagement rather than loading the video with a lot of information. Engaging the viewer emotionally will increase the recall value. Telling a story creatively will help in engaging them emotionally and making an unforgettable video. There is a rule of thumb which states that there should be 20-30 seconds breathing room in a two-minute video.

Misconception 2: There is no difference between written messaging & video messaging

There are professionals who are good at conveying the message through the textual format. They believe saying what they want to convey through a 300-word text will have the same impact in a minute video. However, they do not have an idea of what can be conveyed in that minute. They also believe that what can be conveyed in 100 seconds through text can be conveyed in the 100-second video. There is a conception that the impact of conveying through a well-written message in the voice-led video will make the same impact as a blog post. This is a misconception. It needs to be determined by the message that needs to be conveyed. Moreover, an average reading speed is 200 words per minute, but average speaking speed is 150 words per minute. To read what is on paper may take 75 seconds, but to speak it on video takes 100 seconds. Adding imagery and music along with breathing space, the video length will exceed to make the impact. There is a difference between a written message and a video message. Opt for a way based on what needs to be conveyed.

Misconception 3: I understood what I convey, so will my audience

Video producers need to take the point of view of the audience into consideration while making a video. Making a video based on your point of view may result in a great video, but if the audience does not understand, it will of no use. There is a misconception that if a video producer understands what needs to be conveyed in the video, everyone else will. Conveying the information in a way the target audience will understand is important. This will help in making an unforgettable video.

Making a corporate video is one of the essential strategies of branding. It helps in gaining a wide exposure and engaging audience in a very less time. Being one of the leading corporate video production companies, Kaizen Design Studio helps corporate companies convey the information in the most effective and creative way to make the maximum impact.

[strangerivy]

The First Night

Summary: Y/N sits on the roof reflecting on the events of the day working her way through her grief of loosing two people she thought of as family. Levi goes up to comfort her and bring her back from the darkness that threatened to consume her. Rating: 18+ Warnings: Death | Violent Depictions | Swearing | Grief | Loss  Word Count: 1.8k Author’s Note: This is so sad, I cried a little writing it. I promise my next story will be a bit happier 💜 

|| Masterlist | AOT Masterlist ||

Year 844 - Summer

It was a clear night sky, not a single cloud anywhere, but it shouldn’t be this beautiful out on a night like this. On a night where you cursed the world and wished you could turn the clock. It shouldn’t be this beautiful out when they aren’t here to see it. It should be storming out just like it did earlier, the sky should match how you felt. Anger, hurt, heartache and pain. So much pain and not just physically.

You looked up into the sky watching all the stars shine lighting up the world in a soft glow with the moon. It was beautiful, something not too long ago you only got to see through a hole in the ground. Now you would give anything to have that again if it meant you all would be together right now.

A sob racked through your chest as you looked to your left and right to see the spots that once held your two dear friends were now empty. Your bandaged and broken body protest with each movement but you couldn’t stop the tears of your grief. The medic protested to you getting out of the bed, but you ignored it spitting a string of curses and insults at them, not able to lay in that damn room for another minute, you needed air, somewhere to cry alone which is how you ended up here. You wiped the tears that had escaped with the back of your hand letting out a broken laugh, wincing from your wounds.

“Shit, I thought we were done with this,” You grumbled to yourself looking back up at the sky giving up on drying your tears and letting them fall freely now as your friend's voices from the previous night echoed throughout your mind.

You should be dead. There was no doubt in your mind that you also should have joined your two friends in death. If it wasn’t for Lev- you sighed heavily another sob ripping through your chest as you stopped that thought before it dragged you down further than you had already fallen. You folded, head in your hands as you cried to yourself, elbows propped on your thighs as your legs dangled off the edge.

The images of what happened played through your mind almost as if you were torturing yourself with it.

The day seemed to be going as planned until the rain that is. Where did this storm even come from? It was clear just a moment ago and now it was pouring down rain and the wind was blowing with a force and to make it even worse a fog has rolled in with it making it so you couldn’t even see five feet in front of you. You had lost part of your squad already from the poor visibility caused by the weather. Levi had pushed ahead to use the rain as cover to locate Erwin Smith in the center of the formation.

“Do you think he’ll be okay?” You worried turning your horse to follow Furlan and Isabel.

“Of course he will!” Isabel responded brightly, always the ray of sunshine in any situation.

You, Isabel, and Furlan went back in the direction you thought you heard the sound grenade go off hoping it was your squad that had sounded it, the rain started to come down harder and you had to hold onto your hood to keep it from blowing off, your arm also helping keep the rain out of your face.

You heard the hooves of more horses and looked over to see two cloaks, Flagon looking behind at the three of you.

“You guys are okay,” Flagon seemed relieved at seeing the three of you, but he then looked confused noticing there was a missing member from our group.

“Where is Levi?” He questioned and you tensed a little but kept a blank face as you all kept moving forward.

“We got separated in the fog,” Furlan lied, Flagon seem to accept the answer though which is what mattered. You looked out ahead of you wiping your face of the rain and that’s when it happened. It was quick, you didn’t even see it coming. Your horse veered to the right almost knocking you off it from the sudden movement. You looked up your eyes widening with fear. An abnormal had your squadmate, Sairam, dangling in its mouth blood dripping out of its mouth. It didn’t stand upright like most titans using all four of its limbs allowing it to move faster than most titans as well. Flagon yelled for Sairam to hang on charging at the beast. It was quick to finish of Sairam before grabbing Flagon who yelled at you three to run.

You trembled with fear as you watched it clamp down on Flagon’s body cutting him in half with its teeth and empty stare in its eyes while it stared at the three of you chewing. You should move, you should run but the shock of the scene in front of you had you frozen.

Isabel was the first to move and then Furlan going after her. You quickly regained your composer joining them. You and Furlan trying to distract the beast as Isabel went for the kill. The titan was quick though snatching her quickly by her head, lowering her kicking body down before severing her head from her body you and Furlan watching helplessly tears streaming down both your faces when Isabel’s screams ceased.

Furlan in a blind rage went for a kill but the titan was too quick, you tried to save him, but it grabbed hold of your cables slamming you to the ground hearing something crack from the impact, you let out a strangled cough feeling pain shoot throughout your body at the movement. You heard something hit the ground next to you, you tremble afraid of what you would see but you still turned your head a scream leaving your lips when the top half of Furlan laid right beside you. You looked up at his face holding back sobs as Furlan’s face stared back at you with an empty gaze.

You rolled over flinching when that same pain shot through you again. You ignored it pushing yourself further, standing up gripping your blades. You stared at Titan with a dark glare, if you were going to die you were going to do it fighting. You gripped on to your blades tightly shooting your cables moving quickly, using more gas than you should be dragging your blades deep up its arm and it let out a howl of pain before moving to grab you, you were quick to dodge but this titan was also quick to snagging your foot before you could react to its movement again. Another crack had you let out a scream as your ankle throbbed in the titan's grip feeling like it was crushing it.

When you looked up at the face of the titan, tears streaming down your face, it almost looked as it had a sickening smirk on its face as if it were mocking you knowing that it had won. That it would have killed you all after eating you. With a final burst of energy, you swung your sword up slicing the knuckles of the hand that held you. It dropped you and you hit the ground once again with a loud smack another round of coughs racking through your body a trail of blood dripping out of the side of your mouth.

It was hard to breathe as you laid there, staring up at the dark clouds overhead, you wish you could see the sky one more time. You wished you could see snow in the winter and the flowers in the spring. You weren’t done yet but that wasn’t up to you now. The sky disappeared as the hand of the titan blocked your view. You let out a shaky breath the tears flowing freely as you braced for the end. You silently wished Levi goodbye, praying he wouldn’t beat himself up over this. You closed your eyes waiting for the grip of the titan an odd sense of peace washing over you, but the hand never came.

You opened your eyes to see a flash of green sliced through the Titan pulling its attention from you and towards its attacker. You let out a gasp spotting the raven-haired man. You watched as Levi screamed in agony after each twist and pull of his gear slicing the titan repeatedly until its body didn’t have a spot on it that didn’t have a deep slash. Another blow had its head flying clear off till he finished it off with the final blow to the nape its body finally slamming to the ground steam coming off its decomposing corpse.

Levi landed on his feet his ebony hair hanging in his face almost hiding the tears that fell from his cheeks.

“Levi…” You whispered wincing in pain as you pushed your way up to stand. Levi’s head snapped up his eyes wide as they landed on your broken body. His strides were quick as he made his way to you pulling you to him as you collapsed causing you to let out a small groan in pain. His body shaking with tears for your fallen friends.

“You’re alive,” He said almost like he was confirming it for himself. That at least one of you survived.

Your cries were too loud for you to hear the footsteps behind you, the man behind you with an unreadable face as he watched your broken form. He reached out gently touching your shoulder making you jump at the sudden contact. You flinched at the sudden movement gripping your chest where your broken ribs were. You looked over your shoulder to see Levi standing there with broken eyes as he watched you fall apart quietly. You sniffled wiping the tears once again you slowly turned grabbing a hold of the crutch next to you. Levi reached down helping you wobble your way to standing on your good foot getting the crutch ready for you to lean on.

You both stood there in silence staring at one another, he slowly raised his hand touching your cheek wiping a stray tear away. You let out a small sniffle as you felt your eyes begin to water once again. His hand slowly snaked to the back of your head weaving into your hair before pulling you into him as your sniffles turned to whimpers. You buried your face into his chest staining his white-uniformed shirt with your tears. He moved his other hand around your waist holding you even closer to him.

“I-I-I’m s-s-so-rry,” you cried into his chest your body trembling, you felt his hands grip you tighter “I- I should-I should have been able to stop it.” He grabbed ahold of your upper arms pushing you back enough to look at you. He was angry now.

“Don’t you fucking dare, Y/N” He gritted his teeth “You’re not going to blame yourself for this,” he pulled you close once again, you stood still your tears starting to slow down now as he held you rubbing soft circles into your back.

“I miss them,” you whispered after a few moments of silence, he let out a small sigh his breath tickling your neck.

“Me too,”

[howlingsaturn]

cotton candy skies (and the sweetness of your love)

carlos finally sought out his parents and told them about his relationship with tk. it doesn’t go quite like he expected and so he finds tk immediately after. 

here we go lads, 2.8k of fluff coming right at you. i’ve wanted it to be mostly carlos centric but there is some tk pov in the beginning too. no trigger warning for this one but stay safe everyone. <3

ao3 link if you wanna say hi. 

a forever with you

wouldn't nearly be enough

to quench the flames

you continue to rekindle in me

It's been a couple of weeks since their fight and TK can tell that it still lies heavily on Carlos' mind. While TK feels like it has brought them closer together, he finds Carlos staring off into space more recently. Sometimes he would look at TK with a hint of guilt and shame in his eyes and TK would need to assure him that it's okay, they've moved past it. Carlos would nod and kiss him but the weight on his shoulders would not lift one bit. It's frustrating, TK wants nothing more than to ease the tension in his body and help him carry the weight, but TK promised Carlos he would be patient and he's fully intent on keeping his promise. 

It comes as a bit of a surprise to him when Carlos shows up at the firehouse towards the end of his shift, unannounced. TK is currently sitting at the table, nursing a mineral water and talking to Marjan about the call they've just responded to when Paul's excited exclamation echoes through the otherwise quiet firehouse. 

"Reyes!" He calls, "Long time no see."

TK turns at just the right moment and as Carlos comes into view, a kind smile on his lips, TK can't stop his own from splitting into a grin. Paul's right though, Carlos hasn't been around as much as he used to because of the many hours he's currently working. TK has tried to talk him into taking a few days off but so far Carlos has refused, seemingly needing the distraction his job provides. It makes TK worry but he really tries not to push him too far, he trusts that Carlos will come to him if he's ready. 

"Good to see you too, Strickland," TK hears Carlos laugh, watching as he leans in for a hug, "Work's been crazy lately, you know how it is."

"Don't have to tell me," Paul replies as they break apart, "Just make sure you're taking care of yourself, alright?" 

Carlos' face softens and TK feels his heart clench in his chest. It's not surprising that Paul immediately knows something's been bothering Carlos but it leaves TK a bit unsettled anyway. 

"Your boy's in there, by the way," Paul adds and TK shakes himself out of his thoughts. He watches as Carlos' eyes follow Paul's gesture and when their eyes meet, Carlos' smile settles. He tilts his head in a quick movement, asking TK to meet him outside, and TK is out of his seat before he can start overthinking Carlos' intentions. He jogs up to him, throwing a glance in Paul's direction but Paul has already turned back to his task. 

"Hey," TK exclaims, a little breathless. 

"Hi," Carlos echoes, "You got a minute? There's something I need to talk to you about." 

"Sure," he responds with a grin although he can't help but feel a little anxious, "You have until the bell rings." 

Carlos nods in understanding and turns half a step, walking back out of the firehouse. TK can feel the gazes of his team boring into his back but he takes a deep breath and follows Carlos outside. 

"You okay?" TK asks when he comes to a stop next to Carlos, reaching out a hand to gently touch his wrist, watching him carefully. Carlos' hands are stuffed into his pockets, eyes locked into the distance to the left side of TK and he follows his gaze, quickly realising what has Carlos so transfixed: The sun is setting over the hills, only a few rays of sunshine are left to peek through the buildings, and the clouds are tinted in a soft pink colour that reminds TK of cotton candy. It makes his gut tingle with warmth.  

"Beautiful, isn't it?" He breathes out with a smile. 

"Yeah." 

TK turns to look at Carlos and finds him already looking at him, sporting a smile so soft, TK recognises it as the smile Carlos has reserved for him only. It makes his own smile widen and the anxiety that has previously made him breathless dissipates. 

"You're a sap," TK says and Carlos just shrugs, reaching for TK's hand to pull him close against his side, needing the comfort. He takes a moment to look at TK and the way he tilts his head as he regards Carlos a little sceptically. He raises his brow, biting the inside of his cheek while he does so and Carlos finds it absolutely endearing. The pink sky behind him illuminates his face in a soft, warm glow and something about the light makes the green in his eyes pop out more than usual. He's beautiful and Carlos wishes he could freeze time so he could look at him forever. TK lets him have his fill, Carlos is surprised by how long he lets him stare, but after a while he starts fidgeting. 

"Not that I don't love being the centre of your attention," he confesses, tilting his head down in slight embarrassment, "but you are kind of freaking me out right now."

"Sorry," Carlos laughs, enamored by the colour on TK's cheeks. His gaze drifts back towards the skyline and the weight of what happened today catches up on him again. The smile falls from his face as his muscles tense and the hand that still holds onto TK squeezes involuntarily. 

"Carlos, baby, what's wrong?" TK reaches out with the hand that isn't clutched in Carlos' and squeezes where his neck meets his shoulder, just now noticing how rigid Carlos is. 

"I love you a whole lot," Carlos says slowly, calculated, as his focus turns back to TK, "you know that right?" 

It takes TK a bit off guard if he's honest. They haven't said the words in a while but TK knows, he's always known. Carlos wears his heart on his sleeve and there's not a day that goes by where Carlos doesn't show him how loved he is. 

"Of course," TK tells him and now he's worried. He presses himself to Carlos' side, if to comfort Carlos or himself, he isn't sure, and plants a soft kiss to his shoulder. He looks up at him, searching his face, but as his hand slides down to curl around his elbow, Carlos looks away again. TK notices the tension in his jaw but the way his chest deeply expands with each breath tells TK that Carlos isn't as upset as he initially thought he was. It feels more like he's trying to order his thoughts, desperately searching for something he can't find, something he can no longer make sense of. 

"I visited my parents today," Carlos finally explains and TK's heart skips a beat, squeezing his arm in silent support.

"I told them I lied. I told them that the handsome guy they met at the market a while back wasn't my friend from work but the love of my life." 

Carlos can feel the way TK's breath hitches from how close he stands and it makes him hide a smile. He turns to look at him and watches TK as he opens and closes his mouth, visibly fumbling to assemble his thoughts. Carlos knows exactly what he's thinking. Love of his life? 

"And how do-- how did they react?" TK finally gets out, swallowing heavily. 

"They were calm," Carlos replies, "Surprised. I think they didn't know what to say at first, but after a few minutes of awkward silence my mom started asking about you and the how's and when's of our relationship." He shrugs, a futile attempt to appear nonchalant, but TK can see right through him. The anxiety of that talk probably still lingers. 

"And then she asked me if I was happy."

"Oh," TK mutters and it sounds a little self-conscious, "What did you say?" 

"The truth," he replies, eager to erase TK's doubts, "that you make me the happiest man on earth. That when you walked out on me a month ago, it felt like my heart was torn into a million pieces and that that day, I swore to myself to never make you doubt your place in my life ever again."

Carlos can clearly see the impact his words have on TK and he realises he should've been more open with him. He knows he has turned into himself lately, knows he has tried really hard to hide himself and his feelings away. But the terror he had felt upon the prospect of his parents finding out about TK and their relationship and disapproving of it, has been weighing heavily on him. He doesn't know why he's been so scared, he knows he would survive his parents' rejection, but to Carlos, there's nothing more important than family. And despite the fact that he's a grown man with a secure job and stable relationships, he can't imagine not having his parents' house to return to and seek shelter in if his world starts collapsing. When it comes to his mother, he will always be the soft little guy with too many fears, desperate for a comforting touch or reassuring words. He just can't help it. 

"Carlos," TK pulls him out of his own head and he hurries to order his thoughts. There's something else he needs to get out, a confession that has changed his life completely.

"But you know what my mom did?" 

TK shakes his head. 

"She took my hand and said she was glad I had somebody who loves me. She said she was sorry for how they reacted all those years ago, that they figured by simply acting like it wasn't a big deal, like it didn't change anything, they would do me a favour." 

Carlos chokes on his words, willing away the tears that threaten to spill, and holds onto TK a little stronger. TK presses another kiss to his shoulder, resting his cheek against Carlos and rubbing circles into his arm. He doesn't know why he's getting so emotional now, this is even about him.

"You know what else she said?" Carlos asks.

"Hm?"

"She said couldn't wait to properly meet you."  

TK's eyes widen in surprise and something about the huge smile that's now gracing Carlos' lips, makes him choke on his own tears as well. Carlos reaches for him then, tilting TK's head up for a kiss, and TK all but melts into him. 

"So wait," he mumbles between kisses, "You do want me to meet your parents now right?" 

Carlos laughs again, shaking his head in fond exasperation. "Of course I want you to meet my parents." 

"Ok, ok," TK says and winds his arms around Carlos' neck, "just making sure."

He kisses him again, feverishly so, and when TK pulls back to look at him, Carlos isn't yet ready to let go. He coaxes TK into another kiss and then another and another until he's breathless with it all.

"I'm so proud of you," TK whispers when they finally break apart, gently cupping Carlos' face in his hands, and the noise Carlos makes in response sounds a little pained. Carlos curses silently as he can't help the tears that we'll up in his eyes again. Today has been one hell of a roller coaster ride. 

"You are so fucking brave," TK adds, not allowing Carlos to look away even for a second, and as he raises on his tiptoes to press a series of soft pecks onto Carlos' cheeks, Carlos finally loses the tension in his shoulders. He lets himself be tugged into a hug, his arms winding across TK's back to pull him closer and he allows himself to calm. He pulls back after a while, the urge to see TK too strong to ignore, and when TK smiles at him gleefully, Carlos knows he’s going to be okay. Right here with TK in his arms, he feels safe. 

"I love you," TK tells him, his hands resting against the back of Carlos' neck and Carlos has to kiss him for it. It's probably wildly inappropriate, standing outside the firehouse wrapped around each other like that, but Carlos doesn't care, he only has one priority and that's kissing TK. Judging by the way TK holds onto him and reciprocates the kiss, Carlos doesn't think he minds either. He does eventually break the kiss, much to TK's dismay, but only because there's more he needs to say.

He takes another moment to look at TK, it seems that he can't stop staring at him today, and the flush shining high on his cheekbones makes Carlos' stomach flutter. His eyes are wide with joy, his lips red and puffy and he looks so god damn perfect, Carlos cannot wait to take him home and show him how utterly loved he is. He reaches up a hand and cups his jaw, pressing another longing kiss to his lips that leaves TK chasing after him with eyes still closed. Carlos presses his thumb to TK's bottom lip, applying gentle pressure, and he watches mesmerized as TK swallows, his eyes fluttering open with a gasp. 

"Move in with me," Carlos says and the way TK's brows raise almost comically makes him stifle a laugh. 

"What?" TK responds confusedly. 

"You heard me. Move in with me, Ty." 

TK studies him for a few seconds, probably debating whether he's understood Carlos correctly and what comes out of his mouth is exactly what Carlos had expected. 

"Are you sure about this?" He asks, a hint of excitement glinting behind the insecurity in his eyes but Carlos knows he needs more reassurance than that. 

"Sure about wanting you to come home to me every day? Absolutely."

"And you're not just saying that because I've complained about my parents so much lately?" 

Carlos huffs out a laugh, gently squeezing TK's hip. 

"Look, of course I want you to have a safe space to retreat to when things get difficult with your parents but it's not just that."

TK's lips twitch into a smile and Carlos has to force himself not to kiss him again because if he did, he's not sure he could make himself stop. There's just something about the way TK looks at him that lights a fire in his chest. 

"I miss you when you're not around," Carlos explains, his voice dropping low with emotion, "the house is far too quiet and the bed far too cold without you there. You already occupy so much space in my heart, it's only reasonable you occupy space in my home, hopefully our home, too." 

TK lets out a watery laugh, biting his bottom lip in an attempt to hold the tears at bay. 

"That was so damn cheesy," he says and Carlos fears if he smiles any harder, he's going to tear his face apart. There's not a hint of nervousness in Carlos, he already knows what TK's answer is going to be.

"Well did it work?" He asks anyway, his own smile hurting his cheeks. 

TK squints at him, pretending to think it over, but he's far too happy to be a little shit about it for long.

"Yeah," he replies softly, genuinely, "I love you, Carlos, more than I ever thought possible and I hope you know that you make me really happy too. So yes, I'd love to move in with you." 

Carlos leans down and kisses him but their smiles are too wide for it to be a proper kiss. 

"You know I would offer you a key in a grand romantic gesture but you already have one."

TK makes a snorting sound, shaking his head in amusement. 

"So no grand romantic gestures for me?"

Carlos' smile turns soft then, images of a shared future appearing in his head and they look as beautiful as cotton candy skies. 

"Not this time, no."

TK wriggles his eyebrows knowingly and it makes Carlos blush, but his smile changes as well. It's sweeter now, his eyes mirroring what Carlos feels, and sometimes Carlos wonders what he did to deserve a love this special. 

"This time, huh?" TK asks, and the roughness of his voice masks the humour in his response, "Are you already planning a proper one then?" 

Carlos just shrugs and secures his hold on TK, but it's not like he ever plans on letting go anyway. 

"Maybe."

TK launches himself at him, pulling Carlos into another earth-shattering, toe-curling, breath-stealing kiss, and as the sun fully sets behind them, the sky now a warm orange, something in Carlos settles. Marriage is not something that is going to happen in the near future, they both know, but if Carlos is already making a mental checklist of everything he needs for the perfect proposal, TK doesn't have to know. 

[theshedding]

Lil Nas X: Country Music, Christianity & Reclaiming HELL

I don’t typically bother myself to follow what Lil Nas X is doing from day to day, or even month to month but I do know that his “Old Town Road” hit became one of the biggest selling/streamed records in Country Music Business history (by a Black Country & Queer artist). “Black” is key because for 75+ years Country music has unsuspiciously evolved into a solidly White-identified genre (despite mixed and Indian & Black roots). Regrettably, Country music is also widely known for anti-black, misogynoir, reliably homophobic (Trans isn’t really a conversation yet), Christian and Hard Right sentiments on the political spectrum. Some other day I will venture into more; there is a whole analysis dying to be done on this exclusive practice in the music industry with its implications on ‘access’ to equity and opportunity for both Black/POC’s and Whites artists/songwriters alike. More commentary on this rigid homogeneous field is needed and how it prohibits certain talent(s) for the sake of perpetuating homogeneity (e.g. “social determinants” of diversity & viable artistic careers). I’ll refrain from discussing that fully here, though suffice it to say that for those reasons X’s “Old Town Road” was monumental and vindicating. 

As for Lil Nas X, I’m not particularly a big fan of his music; but I see him, what he’s doing, his impact on music + culture and I celebrate him using these moments to affirm his Black, Queer self, and lifting up others. Believe it or not, even in the 2020′s, being “out” in the music business is still a costly choice. As an artist it remains much easier to just “play straight”. And despite appearances, the business (particularly Country) has been dragged kicking and screaming into developing, promoting and advancing openly-affirming LGBTQ 🏳️‍🌈 artists in the board room or on-stage. Though things are ‘better’ we have not yet arrived at a place of equity or opportunity for queer artists; for the road of music biz history is littered with stunted careers, bodies and limitations on artists who had no option but to follow conventional ways, fail or never be heard of in the first place. With few exceptions, record labels, radio and press/media have successfully used fear, intimidation, innuendo and coercion to dilute, downplay or erase any hint of queer identity from its performers. This was true even for obvious talents like Little Richard.

(Note: I’m particularly speaking of artists in this regard, not so much the hairstylists, make-up artists, PA’s, etc.)

_____

Which is why...in regard to Lil Nas X, whether you like, hate or love his music, the young brother is a trailblazer. His very existence protests (at least) decades of inequity, oppression and erasure. X aptly critiques a Neo-Christian Fascist Heteropatriarchy; not just in American society but throughout the Music Business and with Black people. That is no small deal. His unapologetic outness holds a mirror up to Christianity at-large, as an institution, theology and practice. The problem is they just don’t like what they see in that mirror.

In actuality, “Call Me By Your Name”, Lil Nas X’s new video, is a twist on classic mythology and religious memes that are less reprehensible or vulgar than the Biblical narratives most of us grew up on vís-a-vís indoctrinating smiles of Sunday school teachers and family prior to the “age of reason”. Think about the narratives blithely describing Satan’s friendly wager with God regarding Job (42:1-6); the horrific “prophecies” in St. John’s Book of Revelation (i.e. skies will rain fire, angels will spit swords, mankind will be forced to retreat into caves for shelter, and we will be harassed by at least three terrifying dragons and beasts. Angels will sound seven trumpets of warning, and later on, seven plagues will be dumped on the world), or Jesus’s own clarifying words of violent intent in Matthew (re: “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.” 10:34). Whether literal or metaphor, these age old stories pale in comparison to a three minute allegorical rap video. Conservatives: say what you will, I’m pretty confident X doesn’t take himself as seriously as “The true and living God” from the book of Job.

A little known fact as it is, people have debunked the story and evolution of Satan and already offered compelling research showing [he] is more of a literary device than an actual entity or “spirit” (Spoiler: In the Bible, Satan does not take shape as an actual “bad” person until the New Testament). In fact, modern Christianity’s impression of the “Devil” is shaped by conflating Hellenized mythology with a literary tradition rooted in Dante’s Inferno and accompanying spooks and superstitions going back thousands of years. Whether Catholic, Protestant, Mormon, Scientologist, Atheist or Agnostic, we’ve spent a lifetime with these predominant icons and clichés. (Resource: Prof. Bart D. Erhman, “Heaven & Hell”).

So Here’s THE PROBLEM: The current level of fear and outrage is: 

(1) Unjust, imposing and irrational. 

(2) Disproportionate when taken into account a lifetime of harmful Christian propaganda, anti-gay preaching and political advocacy.

(3) Historically inaccurate concerning the existence of “Hell” and who should be scared of going there. 

Think I’m overreacting? 

Examples: 

Institutionalized Homophobia (rhetoric + policy)

Anti-Gay Ministers In Life And Death: Bishop Eddie Long And Rev. Bernice King

Black, gay and Christian, Marylanders struggle with Conflicts

Harlem pastor: 'Obama has released the homo demons on the black man'

Joel Olsteen: Homosexuality is “Not God’s Best”

Bishop Brandon Porter: Gays “Perverted & Lost...The Church of God in Christ Convocation appears like a ‘coming out party’ for members of the gay community.”

Kim Burrell: “That perverted homosexual spirit is a spirit of delusion & confusion and has deceived many men & women, and it has caused a strain on the body of Christ”

Falwell Suggests Gays to Blame for 9-11 Attacks

Pope Francis Blames The Devil For Sexual Abuse By Catholic Church

Pope Francis: Gay People Not Welcome in Clergy

Pope Francis Blames The Devil For Sexual Abuse By Catholic Church

The Pope and Gay People: Nothing’s Changed

The Catholic church silently lobbied against a suicide prevention hotline in the US because it included LGBT resources

Mormon church prohibits Children of LGBT parents to be baptized

Catholic Charity Ends Adoptions Rather Than Place Kid With Same-Sex Couple

I Was a Religious Zealot That Hurt People-Coming Out as Gay: A Former Conversion Therapy Leader Is Apologizing to the LGBTQ Community

The above short list chronicles a consistent, literal, demonization of LGBTQ people, contempt for their gender presentation, objectification of their bodies/sexuality and a coordinated pollution of media and culture over the last 50+ years by clergy since integration and Civil Rights legislation. Basically terrorism. Popes, Bishops, Pastors, Evangelists, Politicians, Television hosts, US Presidents, Camp Leaders, Teachers, Singers & Entertainers, Coaches, Athletes and Christians of all types all around the world have confused and confounded these issues, suppressed dissent, and confidently lied about LGBT people-including fellow Queer Christians with impunity for generations (i.e. “thou shall not bear false witness against they neighbor” Ex. 23:1-3). Christian majority viewpoints about “laws” and “nature” have run the table in discussions about LGBTQ people in society-so much that we collectively must first consider their religious views in all discussions and the specter of Christian approval -at best or Christian condescension -at worst. That is Christian (and straight) privilege. People are tired of this undue deference to religious opinions. 

That is what is so deliciously bothersome about Lil Nas X being loud, proud and “in your face” about his sexuality. If for just a moment, he not only disrupts the American hetero-patriarchy but specifically the Black hetero-patriarchy, the so-called “Black Church Industrial Complex”, Neo-Christian Fascism and a mostly uneducated (and/or miseducated) public concerning Ancient Near East and European history, superstitions-and (by extension) White Supremacy. To round up: people are losing their minds because the victim decided to speak out against his victimizer. 

Additionally, on some level I believe people are mad at him being just twenty years old, out and FREE as a self-assured, affirming & affirmed QUEER Black male entertainer with money and fame in the PRIME of his life. We’ve never, or rarely, seen that before in a Black man in the music business and popular culture. But that’s just too bad for them. With my own eyes I’ve watched straight people, friends, Christians, enjoy their sexuality from their elementary youth to adolescence, up and through college and later marriages, often times independently of their spouses (repeatedly). Meanwhile Queer/Gay/SGL/LGBTQ people are expected to put their lives on hold while the ‘blessed’ straight people run around exploring premarital/post-marital/extra-marital sex, love and affection, unbound & un-convicted by their “sin” or God...only to proudly rebrand themselves later in life as a good, moral “wholesome Christian” via the ‘sacred’ institution of marriage with no questions asked. 

Inequality defined.

For Lil Nas X, everything about the society we've created for him in the last 100+ years (re: links above) has explicitly been designed for his life not to be his own. According to these and other Christians (see above), his identity is essentially supposed to be an endless rat fuck of internal confusion, suicide-ideation, depression, long-suffering, faux masculinity, heterosexism, groveling towards heaven, respectability politics, failed prayer and supplication to a heteronormative earthly and celestial hierarchy unbothered in affording LGBT people like him a healthy, sane human development. It’s almost as if the Conservative establishment (Black included) needs Lil Nas X to be like others before him: “private”, mysteriously single, suicidal, suspiciously straight or worse, dead of HIV/AIDS ...anything but driving down the street enjoying his youth as a Black Queer artist and man. So they mad about that?

Well those days are over.  

-Rogiérs is a writer, international recording artist, performer and indie label manager with 25+ years in the music industry. He also directs Black Nonbelievers of DC, a non-profit org affiliated with the AHA supporting Black skeptics, Atheists, Agnostics & Humanists. He holds a B.A. in Music Business & Mgmt and a M.A. in Global Entertainment & Music Business from Berklee College of Music and Berklee Valencia, Spain. www.FibbyMusic.net Twitter/IG: @Rogiers1

[harringtonstudios]

best friend’s ex. (II)

plot: he’s your best friend’s ex and you should stay away, but it seems impossible.

A/N: i’m weak for this au what can i say.... hope everyone’s staying safe and enjoying the new songs!! pls give me feedback it fuels me on <3

masterlist!  part I.

Waking up to an warm arm wrapping tightly around your side isn’t normal. In far, it’s so far out of your daily routine, that for a second, you close your eyes again, will yourself to actually get up from the diluted dreamscape you seem to be in.

The same sight greets you the second time around, tuft of blonde hair resting on your chest on top of the white blanket that covers you both. There’s a head attached and it takes you a minute to place everything together before you feel yourself dry swallowing.

The Sahara Desert resides in your mouth, lines up on your tongue and you close your lips together at the uncomfortable feeling of a hangover crawling around you.

Colson Baker.

He’s still asleep, you can tell by the slow rise and fall of his body where it lies basically attached to yours. Why his head is tucked right under your chin, you can’t really explain, just like you can’t quite figure out why you’ve let this happen.

Attempting to shift a little, you hear a soft sound fall out from his lips, see his head move against the haven it rests on. Your chest feels heavy, not just cause of his added weight, but the intent behind it.

The sunlight in his room is filtering through the cracks between his dark curtains. You follow the trail of golden as it creeps over his wooden floor, tilts into the grooves of his floorboards, slides up the white walls.

It’s probably been a minute since you’ve been up, maybe two, but it feels like forever, stuck in this awful limbo.

Your phone starts ringing, tinny and harsh against the beacon of peace you’ve built up for yourself. It startles you enough that you automatically reach out to your side, only to meet empty space. This isn’t your bedroom, the table by your head isn’t there, and you have no idea where your phone is.

The ringtone does enough to wake Colson up. He grunts out something before shifting completely off of you, collapsing back into the mattress. His head is still lower than the various pillows on his bed, but he seems content, face relaxed against the sheets.

You take it in for a millisecond, trace your eyes over his parted pink lips, the faint hint of a scar prepped up between his eyebrows, the flutter of his lashes. 

Not yours, the warning sign shouts. Get away.

Your phone is still ringing when you slide off of his bed, wearing nothing, hastily wrapping the blanket around yourself. He shifts on the bed again, and you watch the way his hand reaches out, down to pull at something that isn’t even there. Your chest tightens again, but he’s just mumbling, sleep dazed and his eyes don’t open.

When you reach your phone, somehow it’s ended up across the room, hidden under your jeans from last night, you’ve had five missed calls.

Domi’s name flashes on your screen, followed by a battery warning and you hiss at the predicament you’ve put yourself in. You quickly text her, a simple: Safe. Will be home soon, with someone.

You don’t specify it past that, try to leave it as open-ended as you can. She’s going to dig, claw her way to the truth, but for now, there’s other things to worry about.

There’s a charger plugged next to his bed and you move over, still clutching his blanket as you bend down to attach your phone to it, satisfied as it slightly buzzes, muttering out “Fuck yeah.”

“Good morning to you too,” replies Colson, his voice deeper, twinged with hours of sleep and the lingering effects of vodka.

You straighten up, awkwardly smile at him, feeling very warm trapped between his feather downs. He smiles back, but lets his fingers rub at closing eyes.

“Where are my clothes?” he asks. It’s only then that you actually look at him fully in bed. He’s just as naked as you, bare and on display and you blush at his lack of modesty. It’s not unusual, even when Domi was dating him, you’d been mooned enough times to recognize his ass in a line up, but it feels intimate now.

“I have no idea,” you mumble, shifting your eyes away as he stretches his arms. He takes in the sight of you, the blanket loosely hanging over your body, the way your fingers clutch at it like a life preserver, saving you from something you can’t bare to name.

“Are you-?” he starts, but you cut him off nodding quickly. This doesn’t have to be a discussion, you don’t want this to be a discussion.

“Look I’ll just get my stuff and then be out of your way,” you rush out, eager to get back to a sense of normalcy. You’ve had one night stands before, you can handle this.

“No breakfast?” he mumbles and his eyes are lighting up, mischievous in the faint morning light.

“I’d rather starve,” you mutter, turning around to walk back to where your discarded skinny jeans lay.

“Oh c’mon, I know you better than that. We can get waffles or something?” he tries again and you hear him shuffling around as you awkwardly pull on jeans. It’s uncomfortable, you have no idea where your underwear is but at least you’re clothed, which is better than Colson.

“Domi likes waffles. I’m a pancake kinda girl,” you retort, antsy to prove something. He doesn’t know you, not as well as he claims to. Instead he’s mixing up the fragments of your best friend into you, swirling two different people together to create the one he wants.

“Right,” it’s dry, dying halfway in his throat. The silence in the room grows amidst the white noise of his air conditioner.

Picking up your shirt from the corner of his room, you pull it on, awkwardly adjusting it before balling up his blanket and walking over to drop it on his bed.

“Cover up your dick man,” you blurt out, hands running through the tangles in your hair, head jerking slightly at the pull.

“You weren’t saying that last night,” he smirks and you urge to wack him hard, maybe with one of his own weirdly soft pillows.

He reaches down into the drawers crammed under his bed, pulls out a pair of shorts and shuffles into them laughing at his own joke.

You do hit him then, pick up the nearest pillow, sheathed in that same silk pillowcase as the rest before throwing it his way.

He dodges it before flipping you off and the memory of it bites, nights spent throwing things at each other, the guys all egging you two on. Domi used to scoff whenever it started, yell about being childish and irritating, but you secretly knew she enjoyed it too, watched her boyfriend and best friend fight like old friends.

You snap out of it just as fast as you fell in, a pillow coming straight to hit you in the face.

“Colson!” you shout, hand going up to rub the impacted area as he smiles.

“Not sorry,” he simply shrugs and you scoff at him, push off the bed you’d sat on after the collision and go over to where he’s standing, reaching for your phone.

He blocks your hand, shifts over so that’s he standing right in your line of sight, eclipsing any further view. All you see is him, smirk permanently resting on his lips, array of colors bursting on his skin, faint whispers of something hidden in his eyes.

“My phone,” you try unceremoniously, knowing that he won’t let you past him.

“Do breakfast with me,” he demands, but its soft, a plea more than a request.

You sigh, it’s audible and you know he hears it by the slight sag of his shoulders but he’s relentless.

“It’s just like old times, won’t be weird,” he states and you find yourself laughing at his words.

“We both know that’s not true,” you say, eyes lifting up to meet his. There’s a hardness to his gaze and a part of you wants to break through it, dive in headfirst.

But this is not your territory, not your person, not your place. Domi’s etched into his soul, written somewhere, dipped into his past and no matter what you want, there is no feasible way you can be his present without ruining a friendship.

“It’s just pancakes,” he emphasizes, but he’s stepping aside all the same, letting you bend over and grab your phone.

When you turn back around, he has a shirt on, hair ruffled worse than it was when he woke up. It’s sticking up at ends and you fight the urge to walk over, laugh and pat it down.

He’s aimlessly searching for his own phone and you spot it on the windowsill, go over to pick it up and hand it off to him, murmuring, “Okay.”

“Thanks,” he mumbles out and you can’t tell whether it’s for offering his breakfast invitation or finding his phone.

You hesitate a second too long and he gives you a pointed look and then you’re moving into his space, crowding against his front.

His hands automatically fall onto your waist, pull you in but you can the confusion flickering across his face.

“Hey,” he softly says and something breaks in you.

It’s surprisingly easy to kiss him again, to drink in those lips, still warm from the early morning haze, softer than they were last night. There’s that now familiar ringing bell in the back of your head, but it disappears as Colson’s tongue slips into your mouth.

There’s obvious morning breath mingling with rank tastebuds and as much as you want to recoil, you don’t know if you’ll ever let this happen again so you soak it in, let the feeling overwhelm you.

Your fingers travel up to his messy hair, soothingly pulling at the strands in order to attempt tampering them down. He lets out a tiny groan as your nails slightly scratch at his scalp. You push further into him, fall enough that it seems like the only thing holding you up is him.

The door slams open just as you’re getting into it, leaning heavily against Colson’s body as he props himself on the wall.

The sound is enough to make you jump back, and there’s the confused look back on his face as you hastily wipe at your lips.

“You’re still here,” a voice stresses the syllables out, and you eye Rook standing there. He’s dressed, complete with that one snapback that seems to be permanently attached to his head, but the scowl on his face is all you can focus on.

“I was- um- just leaving,” you awkwardly stammer out, putting more distance between the person you seem to be magnetically attracted to.

“We’re getting breakfast. You wanna come along?” Colson spurts out without missing a beat, he’s striding towards the door and your face hardens.

There must have been some kind of miscommunication in the mess of his words, you must have read too far into it because here he was inviting his friend who clearly wasn’t too fond of you as if this was a casual thing.

“I’m good,” Rook says, tone easing when he’s speaking to his best friend. They walk out of view and you’re left alone in the room you’ve only been in twice.

There’s a bathroom right around the corner of his room and you head straight for it, pulling out the toothpaste from his cabinet and applying it to your finger, scrubbing your teeth. It’s primal, but at least you feel cleaner, a bit more aware in your head.

That kiss was stupid. This whole thing is a disaster, Domi’s still blowing up your phone and there’s a cherry pit growing in your stomach.

You step out and Colson’s standing across by the door, tying together his sneaker laces. Rook’s nowhere to be found and you thank the universe for that, far too early to be dealing with his seemingly intense grudge against you.

“I got the keys,” is all you get before the front door is opening and you’re following him down the hallway into the elevator.

Stems from last night come back to you in flashes. The chime of the elevator doors, the apartment numbers passing by in a daze, a clammy hand clutching yours, butterfly kisses on knuckles.

You snap out of it quick as you step into the elevator, expertly avoiding the corner where you’d given in to your heart and kissed Colson for the first time. It feels like a bad omen, shadowy dark and taunting as you both stand in silence, watching the floor numbers pass by.

“Do you have gum?” he asks, and it’s crisp in the August heat, cuts through the stuffiness in the traveling metal box.

You shuffle into your purse from last night, pull out a pack of gum you’d stuck in there and offer it to him going, “You didn’t brush?”

“You hogged the bathroom and I thought you’d wanna get out of there quick,” he explains nonchalantly, popping a stick of mint into his mouth. You tuck the gum back in, try not to watch the way he twirls the wrapper around in his hands.

“Thanks,” you mutter, hoping he gets the intent of what you actually mean. He nods as the doors ding open.

The lobby is surprisingly full, people sitting on the plush couches and there’s a slight, “Fuck,” mumbled out before Colson’s finding your hand and pulling you towards the garage.

“What-“ you get out before he shushes you, head down as you two move quickly.

He doesn’t explain, but you follow along, wondering why he’s running, hiding like he’s done something wrong. The garage door opens and both of you cross to where AJ’s van’s sitting, slew of motorcycles parked beside it.

“We should take the bikes,” he says, but it sounds like he’s already made up his mind and he’s picking apart the keys in his hand, dragging you over to the motorcycles.

“No what’s going on?” you rush out, pulling your hand from his as he clicks the lock on one of the machines.

“There’s a couple of paparazzi lingering. Probably cause of last night, Tony usually calls up and lets us know to avoid the front doors but I guess they just got here,” he rashly explains, setting over the seat.

He looks good, you can’t deny it, like an action movie star in his element, hand on the bars, shoe propped on the side. There’s a smile growing, jaw moving as he chews and you take a mental picture, a secret memento just for you.

“I’m not getting on your stupid bike,” you sum out, turning away from where he’s gearing it up, sound echoing around the empty garage.

“Either you leave with me, or they take pictures of you and then you’re splashed across front pages, no longer a secret,” he states, and he’s moving the bike slowly alongside as you stubbornly walk back to the garage entrance.

The last statement is made to hit you, remind you that he did do something wrong, both of you did and there’s going to be a price you’ll have to pay.

You give him a look as he smiles, knowing he’s gotten you yet again.

“You’re famous enough for the front pages?” you crack at him and he laughs, shoulders shaking.

“Get on the bike Y/N,” he’s shifting forward, creating space on the back and this can’t be safe but the options are so limited that this is the best you’re going to get.

You swing a leg over, stumbling a little at the shift in gravity before settling onto the seat. It’s weird and he’s turning his head to make sure you’re secure before starting up again.

“Keep your hands on me,” he instructs, but you’re tired of following his rules and fold them cautiously on the sliver of seat in front of you.

It’s a mistake and you realize it as soon as he exits the garage. There’s no one on the street around and he’s gunning the speed, wind pulling your hair back, blowing straight at you.

“Holy shit,” you gasp before grabbing onto his shoulders. His arm twitches slightly as you grip the muscle and you can feel every single movement he does.

It’s a red light when he mumbles to you, “Move your hands lower.”

“Why?” you ask, finally comfortable with the way you’re holding onto him after a few streets of green lights.

“Can’t focus properly on the turns,” he says and you’re a little confused but the lights switching to green and there’s a honk right behind, startling you just a little.

You slide your hands down his back, take pleasure in the way it grounds you as he leans forward, swerving between slower cars.

He moves his back, angles it in one direction and you sort of get the hint, settle your hands on his hips like they do in all the cheesy rom-com movies. But this isn’t a movie, this is real life and there’s rules that aren’t supposed to be broken, consequences to face. The air around you turns sour, hits your throat hard and you’re closing your eyes in an effort to not vomit all over Colson.

It takes a few more minutes and he’s pulling into a barely there parking spot of some hole in the wall diner. You’ve never been here, despite living a few blocks away and you wonder why he’s brought you so close to home when that’s exactly where you should be avoiding.

The engine cuts and then he’s scooting back, your hands immediately lifting from his hips where they’d found a unfamiliar solace for the short drive.

“Think we’ll run into her?” he attempts at a joke and you want to scream, want to remind him this isn’t funny, this is seriously fucked.

“I’m gonna go home if you keep this up,” you grunt out, hopping off of the bike, feet glad to be planted on the floor.

“It’s not that serious,” he murmurs, locking his bike before walking to the entrance. You stare at his retreating back, picture punching the shit out of him, blink it away before following.

“Table for two,” he effortlessly grins, blowing a bubble with the stale gum. The waiter gives him an unimpressed look, picks up the two menus and leads you to a corner booth.

You slide in first, and he slides in right beside you, his side just barely touching your arm. The waiter attempts to smile but it seems halfhearted and you can’t help but stifle a laugh at that.

“Get on the other side. This isn’t a date,” you say after the waiter leaves.

“I like it here. You’re warm,” Colson mumbles, reaching for a menu and your heart thuds in its cavity, begging to be let out.

“Look this can’t happen. You’re my best friend’s ex for gods sake, she’d kill me if she even knew I was talking to you,” you ramble out, finger playing with the frayed edge of the table, unable to look at him.

“What is this?” he says.

When you don’t respond, he huffs before going, “Wonder what’d she do to you if she found out we fucked.”

The waiter pauses right before your table, two waters in his hand. He turns around and you stare at his back, will him to come back to save you this hell you’ve found yourself in.

“Colson I’m serious. Shut the fuck up for two seconds and think about it,” you mutter, voice lower so that the waiter can hopefully head your way again. Your throat feels parched, dust settling against your vocal cords.

“I am being serious. I don’t get why she’d care. She broke up with me, it’s been six fucking months. I thought we both moved on,” he states matter-of-factly, reaching over your hands to grab a sugar packet.

He twists it around on the table, pink packet spinning into a blur as you watch it, wondering what to say next.

“It’s messed up. We shouldn’t even have talked to each other,” you breathe out.

“Well we did. Y/N, you’ve always been my friend first. I wasn’t going to ignore you because Domi wouldn’t like it,” he stops the spinning packet with his palm, flattens it into table.

Your waters appear on the table, two straws tossed next to full cups with a, “Ready to order?”

“Give us a few?” Colson says, voice tilting up at the end posing it as question, confidence dripping into his words. There isn’t an answer but the waiter turns away.

“The only reason I know you is cause of her,” you truthfully respond.

“Doesn’t mean our entire relationship has to be based off of what she wants. She’s not good for you,” he grabs a straw, tearing the wrapper before dropping it into a glass and passing it over to you.

Your head’s still stuck on the word relationship, knows that he doesn’t mean it romantically but the thought of it still lingers.

“You can’t say that,” you mumble in response to his last few words.

“Okay. I can’t. But I can tell you that you deserve a best friend who doesn’t go around cutting off your friends because she doesn’t want to see them anymore,” his statement seems like a final word, laying itself in the open air.

The waiter’s walking back and you quickly order the first thing you see, some blueberry pancake special and pray it isn’t bad. He orders an omelet, customizes it and you listen at the ease of his words, how he sounds like he owns the place while specifying his veggies.

Your menu gets handed back over and you sip at the ice water, try not to gulp it down.

“I’m sorry if that was out of line,” he attempts, but you don’t want to hear it anymore, don’t want to break the train of thought in your head repeating his last phrase.

“Can we just- you know be normal for now?” you ask, voice small compared to his.

“Sure yeah. You like blueberries?” he switches so quick it almost gives you whiplash, even though you asked for it.

His arm’s on the booth cushion behind you head, you can feel it as you go to lean back and it feels too close to a date for comfort.

“No it was just the first thing I saw,” you say without really meaning to.

He laughs at that and you smile too, easing into a neutral state.

“What if it’s gross? You know blueberries can freeze in just four minutes,” he spits out and you feel his leg bump against yours at the fun fact.

“Why do you know that?” you huff, eyes going to watch him speak.

“Read an article once,” he seems awfully pleased with himself and you roll your eyes muttering, “Glad to see you know how to read.”

He nudges you hard at that and you fall deeper into him somehow, find yourself tucked right into his side.

“You weren’t this mean to me last night,” he says pointedly, lifting his glass up.

“I wasn’t hungover last night,” you retort, or addled with guilt your mind adds silently.

“Oh shit, I forgot,” and then he’s ruffling through his pockets mumbling, “I thought I had some Advil in here.”

“No thanks, keep your pocket drugs. I’ll just sleep it off at home,” you say, although the idea of home and Domi just makes you queasy.

Two full plates are gently placed in front of you, steaming and fresh. You eye the purple blue dots on your pancakes suspiciously, hoping the taste isn’t as dark as the mosaic it creates visually.

Colson’s omelette looks incredible, cheese and vibrant red tomatoes popping off the plate and you want to taste it, see if its as good as he made it sound.

“I forgot you don’t get hungover,” you mumble, last few bits of the previous conversation slipping through before you lose yourself in the meal.

“Life of a rockstar,” he laughs out before grabbing his fork.

“Humble rockstar,” you laugh back as he clinks his silverware against yours.

The pancakes taste exactly and how they look and your tastebuds struggle in figuring out a flavor pattern. It’s bursts of sour, before buttery goodness and sugary maple. You demolish an entire pancake before realizing you’re out with a friend.

“You want some?” you mumble, chewing over a bite.

He watches you inquisitively from where he sits, fork dancing over his own plate. You will yourself not to blush under his gaze, almost choke on the piece tucked into your mouth.

He pulls off a piece, bites into it and you see his face twist up as he goes, “What is that?”

“Probably frozen blueberries,” you reply and his eyes light up at the recalling of his words as he swallows down the pancake.

“Terrible,” he mumbles, sipping on the dark coffee he’s ordered.

Colson’s a coffee freak, particular about the sugar levels, the amount of ice that goes into his drink, even the origin of the coffee beans. You’d learned this early on as he refused to participate in Starbuck runs, grunted in distaste when you would show up at his apartment, carrying a frappe, Domi sipping happily at her own.

The food finishes quick, you’ve taken bites of his omelette, trying not to praise the medley of flavors he’s somehow incorporated into an egg. He hasn’t cooked it of course, but you would never be able to combine options to come up with this type of breakfast.

He reluctantly finishes your last pancake, dousing it in syrup and making faces with every bite, mostly to make you laugh. His fingers are sticky and he lets them slide together before pulling them apart, string of maple connecting them, his eyebrows raising smirkingly towards you. You push him hard at the innuendo.

The bill comes around and goes back faster than you can react. He pays it quickly and quietly, not even letting you attempt at it. There’s a slight rush that overcomes you at that, you’ve always know he was generous, but this is different from late night McDonalds with the bros, slightly more personal.

He gets up to wash his hands after the mess he’s created and you shake your head at the pure stickiness of his hand as he walks away.

You pull your phone out, knowing you’ll regret it as soon as you catch sight of the time. You’ve been here with Colson for over an hour.

They flow of text messages from your roommate vary in subject, but near the end there’s no emojis, capital letters reflecting back at you and you know she’s mad, can feel it rolling off the screen. This is going to a bitch to hide.

“You should unblock my number while you have it out,” Colson suggests, voice startling you.

“Should I?” you wonder, more to hear it out loud to yourself than actually ask him.

He shrugs but his intentions are clear as he says, “Wouldn’t hurt now, would it?”

“What would you even text me?” you quiz this time, pointer finger tapping at the sides of your phone.

“Don’t know. Cool things. Fun facts,” he rattles off as if he’s creating a shoddy list in his head.

“Convincing,” you laugh before going to your settings. The blocked numbers stare up at you, at least five of them on that list unfairly.

You find his, the first one blocked all the way at the bottom and swipe.

Unblock? your phone asks, as if knowing you’re having trouble with this decision, second thoughts about something as trivial as a phone number.

Yes, you tap and then the list decreases automatically.

“Done,” you say, putting your phone back into your pocket.

“Good,” he hums before offering you his hand.

You take it, weirdly knowing this is the last time you will. He lets your intertwined fingers fall between the two of you, swings them just a little, hitting them against your legs as if he’s just as aware of the finality of it all too.

You take a breath, walk towards the exit. The doors open and you both step out, get down the steps and towards his bike.

You drop his hand first, look up at him, whisper, “I’m going to walk home.”

He doesn’t protest, you can’t tell if he wants to, but you secretly hope he does, in some twisted selfish way.

“Okay,” is all you get back from him and then he’s getting on his bike.

You don’t look back as his engine roars to life, or when you hear the telltale zoom of him speeding away. You feel sick, but remind yourself to keep walking, put as much distance between this mistake as you can.

Your heart aches at the word mistake, cracks the minute you can’t hear the motorcycle anymore, too far gone to even be white noise for your walk of shame home. This has to happen, you remind yourself, staring at the gum stains on the sidewalk. You’re going to be fine.

-

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