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1moremilgram-enjoyer · 1 year ago

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is everyone in milgram just dead

Okay I'm making this post because while I'm not sure how much I believe this, it's a possibility that's been eating at my head for a while, so I gotta share it somewhere even if it's not the most solid theory in the world.

So anyways, hello members of the jury! Today I want to discuss the weirdly recurring theme of the prisoners in Milgram possibly being dead, and Milgram being some sort of afterlife thing. Given the fact it clearly has some supernatural elements, it certainly isn't impossible. So let's get into it!

CW Death, murder and suicide, abortion, child abuse, drowning, cults and indoctrination, waterboarding, gang violence

Yuno and the Allegations

The biggest hint that at least some of the prisoners might be dead is the in Yuno's second VD, Absolute Zero.

Yuno: Oh! Also, that reminds me, there was one thing I'm curious about. Es: What? Go ahead and say it. Y: Am I…really alive? E: That's…what do you…. Y: Hm…if you don't know, then it's fine. E: Yuno…. Y: Hey, it's time, right? E: Y-yes. Prisoner number 2, Yuno. Sing your sins.

Weird thing to say, really. So, presumably, she has some reason to believe she might be dead. Which is especially worrying because Yuno is one of the most intelligent and perceptive prisoners in Milgram, and might even have higher awareness of some of the more supernatural/meta elements of the series, as seen by images from both her cover songs appearing in Umbilical and Tear Drop.

All this is to say, if Yuno has reason to believe she might be dead, we have reason to believe so as well.

There are two points of Yuno's story were I feel she could have died. One is during her abortion, given a question from Trial 2.

(T2) Q20: Did you hate the person you killed?

Y: It was too much of a pain to for me to think about anything.

So her abortion was painful, which likely means it wasn't done in a hospital, as professional abortions typically don't cause too much pain in the moment (source), even if they can cause cramping or discomfort in the recovery period. If it wasn't done professionally, and it hurt a lot, it's very possible she may have died while performing it.

However, because of a few things we'll talk about later, I'm not sure this is very likely. The answer I find more likely is that, unfortunately, she may have committed suicide by jumping off the staircase we see her standing on in her Undercover silhouette shot.

For one, because what the hell would this shot even be otherwise. I've seen people suggest infanticide as opposed to abortion, but that wouldn’t cause physical pain (you could argue that answer is about emotional pain, but I'm not sure how much that works), it doesn't match her kill-shot in Undercover, and she herself has claimed her "muder" was abortion (and I don't see reason for her to lie about that). It also doesn't seem likely she would get pregnant more than once, seeing this question:

(T2) Q10: If you could turn back time, would you commit the same murder once again?

Y: I'd make sure that I won't have to commit it. That's it.

So, then, what the hell is up with that Undercover shot? Usually they say something important about the prisoner or their crime, but it really doesn't seem to have anything to do with anything.

This is where I bring up that Yuno falls off a staircase at the end of Umbilical.

Like, obviously this is more meant to be metaphorical, as in Yuno "slipped up" and now has to avoid falling by grabbing the balloon, which ends up destroying the staircase which had previously been related to the mixing of DNA (long story). But... she still is falling from a staircase. That is what is happening in the video. This is a silly argument, but it does exist.

Now, there's a few other things which could imply this, but that will have to wait for a moment. So while there is very little evidence for now, I'd say this is the most likely reason for why Yuno believes she may be dead. Especially given she might have depression (check out this cool post by weather-cluddy), her comitting suicide is sort of the best guess we can make I feel.

Nevertheless, no matter the reason why, Yuno believes she may be dead, which opens the door to other characters, if not all of them, to be dead as well. Let's take a look at the other prisoner most likely to actually be dead in my opinion, and see if we can establish a pattern.

Haruka's Worrying Situation

I believe, even if no one else is dead, it is highly likely Haruka attempted suicide. I am not going to go too in-depth in here, because moibakadesu already made a really good post about it, which is where I got the theory from in the first place. In fact, the idea Haruka may have at least attempted suicide has existed ever since Trial 1, check out this cool post by Venus from thinkin-bout-milgram. Here's a summary of what the main points of the theory are:

-The repeated motif of water and drowning could indicate the way Haruka killed himself, especially since he lived in Naogaka, Niigata, known as the "city of water."

-Haruka repeatedly attacks and even strangles a younger version of himself in Weakness, in one occasion alongside the lyric "I've become a victim, I've become a victim."

-The young girl in Weakness might actually be a representation of the "ideal Haruka", as he's stated his mother wanted a daughter instead of a son (I don't actually agree with this part, I do think the girl is a literal girl Haruka killed, due to several lines from his VDs, such as him saying Amane "brings back bad memories." However, it's still a possibility)

-The nonchalance with which Haruka speaks of comitting suicide in his second MV, Metamorphosis of the Weak, could imply he's already done it once.

-The line "if with one click, and I can reset everything" in AKAA can be more directly translated to "if with the push of one button I could be reborn", which paired with butterflies being symbols of death and rebirth and being connected to Haruka because of the name of his second VD, could imply Haruka died and was reborn.

-Haruka standing on a chair in AKAA as his shadow lines up with the shadow of the bars in the window to create the ilusion he has a noose around his neck.

-At the end of AKAA, Haruka is surrounded in what looks to be formaldehyde, which is used to preserve the corpses of dead animals, while the aforementioned "I could be reborn" lyric plays.

As you can see, there's a lot here, which is why I think it is highly likely Haruka comitted suicide.

There is an issue with bringing this theory in, which is that part of the theory is that Haruka's silhouette in the Undercover shot doesn't have white noise, which separates him from the others and could imply he's a victim like Hinako and Mahiru's boyfriend, who similarly have no white noise. The problem for our purposes is that this theory assumes a lot of the other prisoners, such as Yuno, may have committed suicide as well, creating an inconsistency with this point. I don't have a good answer for this, beyond a really odd, Hamlet-esque "Haruka is a victim of his own madness" kind of thing which doesn't work very well, so unless any of you have another explanation, it's best for this theory to just sorta ignore the white noise thing.

So, now we have two prisoners who very likely died before Milgram. This vaguely establishes a possible pattern: what if all the prisoners were taken right as they died?

Muu’s Mysterious Memory Mishaps

Es: You said you wanted to go back home, right? And, "suppose" we did let you… Even if you were to leave this place, you'll then have a brush with the police, won't you? Muu: *Surprised* E: I mean, you've killed someone anyway, so are the police not making a move in regards to that? M: Well, I don't know. As of now, I don't have a clear memory of what happened after I did it. And then before I knew it, I was here. E: Is… that so? M: You guys should've known that, being the ones who brought me here after all.

This line from Muu’s first VD has always intrigued me. Muu doesn’t have a very good reason to be lying here when seen in full context, so she’s likely telling the truth. But, why? Why doesn’t Muu remember anything clearly after her crime, and why was she taken so quickly after committing it?

First idea is that perhaps all the prisoners are simply taken right after the murder they’re in Milgram for; even in the case of multiple murders, you can say Milgram just decided to take them for the last one exclusively.

However, Shidou serves as a counter example, because of the ending of Throw Down.

It’s a pretty simple logical progression. Shidou has no reason to kill after the flower person dies, so their death is after his last murder most likely, and yet he does remember it happening. Thus, Shidou has a memory of something which happened an undetermined amount of time after his final murder.

That means the "fuzzy memories" thing isn't universal. This can also be vaguely inferred by the attitudes certain prisoners have regarding their "murder(s)", like Kazui for example.

Now, you could argue Muu simply doesn't remember well because of the Trauma, and she just happened to get taken shortly after her murder. However, there is a chance now that there is a reason she was taken shortly after her murder.

You know what this post is about. You know what I'm about to imply. So I'll make the observation now:

In It's Not my Fault, one of Muu's shoes is off after she kills Rei. And we have seen this imagery of "one shoe off" to represent suicide before.

It's common in Japan to take both shoes off before comitting suicide, but if you want to read into only one of the shoes being off, you could argue it represents they're "half-suicides", as Milgram also considers them murders. In that sense, you (or Muu) could argue were Muu to commit suicide after killing Rei, then she would also become "Rei's victim", the same way Hinako and Mahiru's boyfriend are Kazui and Mahiru's victims.

This idea that Muu might still be a victim in the situation could also be implied by the lyrics here:

[It's Not my Fault] It’s not my fault after all, after all. Everyone wants me to be innocent. What a relief. Can’t be helped. I’m always meant to be pitied!

(Btw I'm using the fan translation in the wiki because the English subs in that video are... odd)

Yes that sentiment is repeated a lot during the song, but Muu does shout "I'm always meant to be pitied" ("I'm always the drama queen") at the top of her lungs here.

Now, the shoe thing isn't quite like that in After Pain, but we never actually see Muu's shoes in the real world, only in the blank inner world with the broken hourglass, and there are other inconsistencies with reality there, namely Rei's body's position.

You can see her right shoe is on there, but again, this scene isn't real.

The concerning thing is that apart from that, After Pain does not help Muu beat the suicide allegations.

In particular, look at the scene of the photo I put there. You can see there's a bunch of people judging Muu for her murder, as it's usually not considered a socially acceptable thing to do. But, hold on, didn't Muu say she didn't remember anything after her murder? Correct! That means she doesn't remember this "judgement" happening, but she imagined it would. Perhaps that's what the one line means:

[After Pain] Counterattack being a suicide note

Counterattacking Rei, killing her, is social suicide. For obvious reasons.

...

But it's still called a suicide note, which is not a good look. And yes, I do think the Japanese lyric explicitly references death, though take that with a lot of salt since that's just Google Translate and DeepL talking.

In fact, that entire set of lyrics is pretty odd.

[After Pain] Let’s meet up inside the pain, a place just for me Postmortem makeup to hide my heart, how to solve it is a secret The stabbing of the little devil’s voice, counterattack being a suicide note “I love YOU”

"Meeting up inside the pain" probably refers to hurting Rei, so now they're hurting together. The "stabbing of a little devil's voice" is probably referring to dangerous impulses, so murderous thoughts. "Counterattack being a suicide note", already explained. "I love YOU", because Muu is a girlkisser.

But the "postmortem makeup" is odd. You could argue the "death" which happened before the "makeup" was applied was the "death" of Muu's reputation, her old persona. Rei "killed" "that Muu", and now Muu is hiding her real feelings with "postmortem makeup."

But then, why would the method to solve it be a secret? Who is she keeping it secret from? Rei, and all of Muu's old 'friends', all know what lies beyond that makeup, they all saw what Muu was like before Rei stepped in.

That means there's another interpretation. If her real feelings are a secret, there's only one person they would be a secret from. Es (and us by extension). In a way, After Pain is hiding part of her heart, the less sympathetic parts shown in full in It's Not My Fault. Muu being a bully was already implied in After Pain, mind you, but it was still relatively "hidden", at least compared to It's Not my Fault.

And if that is the way we're meant to read that line, we run into the allegations again. If the makeup is for Milgram, and it's "postmortem" makeup, then Muu is already dead.

And that's without mentioning how much After Pain seems to imply suicidal tendencies in general.

[After Pain] If I was gone, If I had just disappeared I overheard, I found out How much I’m not needed There’s no special meaning, I got the short end of the stick I overheard, I found out How much I’m not needed

I don’t want tomorrow to come, I want to forget yesterday I was miserable, someone please help me

Maybe I’m done Just one more time before saying goodbye I’m just kidding, please forget I said that

The only lyric that doesn't seem to imply it is:

I want to feel “alive”, is it ok if I breathe?

But feeling alive and being alive isn't quite the same, right? You can be alive without feeling alive, and if someone doesn't feel alive, it's possible they're not a very good state of mind.

So, what could this all imply? If we're going with the idea of murder-suicide, it's possible Muu was very worried about how people would hate her after the murder, as implied by After Pain, decided she didn't want to deal with that, and unfortunately made the decision to kill herself.

One small thing which could serve as a counterpoint is her Trial 1 Voice Reveal distorted line.

Fufufu... It's your fault... for doing horrible things to me.

She seems pretty sure of herself here, and it's very likely this is after her murder. But it's perfectly possible she said this initially, then thought about the social consequences, and that's when she started to feel bad. It's also worth noting the only time in It's Not my Fault where Muu seems to hesitate is right after her murder.

[It's Not my Fault] Wait, wait, just as a hypothetical. What should I do if I’m actually a bad girl? Don’t ever hate me, and don’t look for what lies “after and from” the pain.

This is immediately after the murder, when she comes out of a caccoon, presumably her arriving at Milgram. So, she was initally confident, that's when she says "I’m always meant to be pitied!" in It's Not my Fault and presumably her Voice Reveal line, then hesitated and started to feel awful as we see in After Pain.

... Well, there's also the way more uncharitable reading where Muu killed herself so people also pitied her instead of just hating her for killing Rei, but that's a bit too dark and in bad faith for my tastes. It is there, though.

So, yeah, Muu may be dead too. And she brings with her an interesting implication; the prisoners may not have clear memories of the events leading up to their death. So, even if some of them committed suicide, it's possible they simply don't remember ever taking the decision to do so, explaining their behavior in the prison.

And it also could explain away... one apparent contradiction. One which exists outside of this theory, but that this theory could explain.

Amane and the Voice Reveal Trailers

As most of you know, the Voice Reveal trailers for all these characters contain certain distorted phrases which in general seem closely linked to their murder. And as pointed out by blueepink07 in this post, it seems the First Trial Voice Reveals are things the prisoners said after their murder, while the Second Trial ones are showing a point before their murder. Check out Kazui's, for example.

(T1) "I'm so dumb... Why did I have to dream?"

(T2) "Hinako, I love you more than anything."

There's also Muu's, since I've already brought it up before.

(T1) "Fufufu... It's your fault... for doing horrible things to me."

(T2) "Hey..why don't you listen to me...? I'm telling you... Hey...HEY, I'M TALKING TO YOU"

The second being right before she killed Rei.

That works well enough for all the prisoners... except Amane.

(T1) "Ahh! I'm so sorry...! I'm sorry...! I'm sorry for breaking the rules!"

(T2) "Father is a very praiseworthy person. Once [my/his] virtue increases, he'll come back home, right? It's a little lonely, but I'm fine!"

In theory, Amane would have been punished before her murder, as we see happen after she heals the cat in the taser scene. Meanwhile, if she's lonely without her father, it could perhaps be because her mother is dead after Things Happened (yes I'm going with Mother!Victim theory on this one).

But that's not the case. Following the pattern, the line about her father coming home at some point is before her murder, and apparently, she was punished for breaking some kind of rule after her murder. The implication here, horrid as it is, could be that her father returned home after she killed her mother and punished her for doing so.

Thankfully, this is impossible. After all:

(T1) Q18: Do you regret your "murder"?

A: No. It was a natural obligation.

(T2) Q3: State the name of your victim.

A: There is no victim. Only the punished.

(Taking some liberties on the translation of Trial 2 since the questions are still coming out as I write this)

So Amane genuinely believes she was following her cult's principles to a T when she killed her mom. As much as that likely isn't the case (long story), if she had gotten punished for killing her mom, then she wouldn't think like this. If she had been punished for it, she wouldn't think her murder was a "natural obligation", but rather a mistake on her part.

What this implies is that Amane doesn't remember being punished by her father.

...

Amane... doesn't remember...

Fuck.

Yeah, remember when I said it was possible the prisoners don't have clear memories of the events leading up to their death? Going by the "T1 after - T2 before" logic the Voice Reveals seem to follow, we can infer Amane was likely punished for killing her mother, but we also know she can't remember it happening, otherwise she would regret it. And based on what we learnt from Muu, we do have a way to explain how that could happen. If Amane died while receiving the punishment the T1 Voice Reveal alludes to, she wouldn't have a clear memory of it.

And the thing is, it does seem likely Amane received this punishment. Think about it. Interrogation questions are one thing, since the creators don't fully control them, but why mention her father would possibly return home in the Voice Reveal trailer? Unless he did. Hell, you could argue we might know the exact moment he returned. Amane does look at the entrance of her apartment at the end of Purge March, though that could simply be for dramatic effect rather than being a literal thing which happened.

But there's more. Because if her father returned home, we might actually have an answer for another one of the mysteries surrounding Amane's situation. The Undercover prisoner card.

The image on her card seems to show a bathroom. It is widely assumed the images on these cards are the location the murders happened in, but to my knowledge, this isn't 100% confirmed. However, this creates a small issue with Amane. Just looking at the murder shot in Purge March is enough to confirm that.

I made a more detailed theory on her murder on this post, diagrams included (scroll to the bottom if you're only interested on the murder), but for now, there are two things to note here. One, there's a trail of water which seems to come out of the door with the light on, as the puddles are bigger the closer they get to it, implying that room is the bathroom. And two, the room the murder actually happened in seems to have a window/door behind a curtain, which isn't what Amane's bathroom looks like.

Adittionally, there isn't any blood outside of the murder room, implying the victim's body wasn't dragged there.

All this seems to imply Amane's victim didn't die in the bathroom, which is sorta a problem considering the previously mentioned commonly accepted theory. But this idea that Amane may have died while being punished, perhaps while being drowned as we know that's one of the accepted methods of punishment in her cult, brings up a different possibility.

What if the images in the prisoner cards aren't showing murder location? What if they show the last place the prisoner was seen in, the place they died?

Kotoko, Mikoto, and the Prisoner Cards

So, first, is there any indication either of these might be dead? For Mikoto, not really. Sure, there's the whole Death card at the end of MeMe thing, but that doesn't have to be taken so literally.

Kotoko has a very little potential hint in the fact she's shown alongside a wolf at the start of HARROW, but by the end the wolf is by itself. If the wolf represents a potential partner (long story), then maybe Kotoko died?

Though you can easily argue the wolf is slightly different and thus is meant to just represent Kotoko.

However, the reason I'm bringing them into this is because their prisoner cards are completely nonsensical under "murder location" theory for the images shown. Let's start with Kotoko.

It shows an alleyway, which at first seems like it makes sense. We do see her attacking a man in an alleyway. However, after that happens, one of the pieces of background text says this:

◆ A wanted thief was assaulted by an unknown assailant Early yesterday morning, a nearby shop employee reported hearing screaming and seeing a man lying on the ground. According to the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department, the man had lost consciousness after being beaten on his face, stomach, and other areas, and was taken to the hospital. The police are currently trying to identify the suspect. [...] According to previous investigations, the male victim was wanted throughout Tokyo for theft and assault charges and was identified as the suspect, Mikio Oshii.

(Translation by Maristelina)

Mikio Oshii is the name of the man Kotoko assaulted in the alleyway. It seems odd to me that we would learn he was taken to the hospital if he later died in it somehow, especially because Kotoko didn't want to kill him. We can clearly see this because of a crucial difference between her attack on him and her attack on the serial killer who likely is her victim.

She covers her face while attacking Oshii, because she doesn't want to be recognized. She is committing assault, after all. However, that only matters if she's planning to keep him alive. Conversely, she doesn't cover her face while attacking the serial killer, because she knows he won't be a witness. She went into that warehouse planning to kill.

Of course, she could have accidentally done too much damage, but the issue there is that she would probably express some remorse in that case. She doesn't, and the fact she only ever talks about one victim-

[TASK (T1 VD)] I did kill someone. [...] I don't have a single regret.

-it really seems like Oshii was able to survive her attack.

That creates an issue with her prisoner card. It shows an alleyway, but her only victim died in a warehouse. As confusing as that sequence is, he did die in the warehouse.

You know when we do see an alleyway again, though?

But she's not wearing her face covering. And if this was the alley with the one sign about a car accident that shows up over and over in HARROW, I'd imagine we'd see the sign, even if it was obscured in some way. So once again, a silhouette shot which seems to have nothing to do with her murder or her general situation.

So, is it possible she died in this alleyway? That's the only other reason I can imagine why it'd show up in her prisoner card, so. As for what exactly happened, I imagine she may have been murdered at the whim of her victim's father?

Shocking revelation: The heinous criminal behind the crime is the privileged son of a high-ranking official!

(Article referring to Kotoko's victim)

So, she got found out and immediately assassinated? It's a bit out there, but it would explain both her prisoner card and her attitude in the prison.

And then there's Mikoto.

As you can see, his card shows a street. The issue with Mikoto is one of format. The cards only ever show one location, but we know Mikoto has at least two victims.

[Text: To the right, the Subway Murder, which clearly has a ceiling. The murderer has blood on his right cheek, his left cheek is hidden. There's also the bathhtub scene, where the right cheek is hidden, but the left cheek has blood already trailing off, which doesn't quite fit what we see in the other murder if you think about the bath chronologically.

To the left, a murder out in the street, with an open sky. The murderer has blood on their left cheek, but not on their right. This is seen in both the crime and the shower scene]

So yeah, at least two. You could argue the bathtub murder is actually a third one, which... huh. Two things that absolutely exist and a Secret Third Thing, the existance of which is disputed? Trikoto vibes.

Point is, Mikoto has two different murder locations at least. The street, yes, but also the subway. This creates a problem with the "images in the prisoner cards are murder locations" idea, because it only shows one. You could try to gymnastics your way out of this by saying maybe Hostkoto committed the street murder while Orekoto killed the other victim(s), and because only Hostkoto is considered a prisoner by Milgram, only his murder is shown? But I feel that raises more questions than it answers.

Instead, if we assume the images to be death locations, the ambiguity disappears, because Mikoto as a system can only have one death location. The issue is you have to explain how Mikoto died in the middle of the street, which is a bit difficult.

The best guess I can give is related to the subway victim. It's been pointed out before that guy looks a lot like a stereotypical Japanese delinquent, which could imply he was part of a gang. If that's the case, it's possible the killer angered the wrong people by killing him, similar to Kotoko, and thus was later murdered himself. We know that street isn't very safe, on account of one of the alters getting away with murder there. It's a pretty large stretch, and has like zero evidence, but it's physically possible at least.

Let's take a quick look at the other prisoners and see if their images can also be explained by the "death image" theory.

We know Muu would share a death location with her victim if she really committed suicide as the theory states, so nothing weird there. Haruka's a bit more awkward, because it shows the forest he very likely killed the girl in, but I'm not entirely sure if the forests near Nagaoka has bodies of water deep enough to drown oneself. There is the Shinano river, which has... trees, around it.

This was taken from Google Street View in Nagaoka. Again, not sure how deep it is, but assuming it's deep enough to drown, it could work if you ignore the trees don't look too much like the ones irl. Maybe Haruka threw himself off the bridge?

Alternatively, Nagaoka borders the sea, and it seems like there's forest almost all the way up to it. So maybe that could work? Unsure.

Worst comes to worst, we can maybe change it to saying Haruka didn't drown himself, but killed himself in some other way in the forest. Point is, I think Haruka's isn't too big of an issue.

Fuuta, Mahiru and Kazui don't have a lot of evidence towards what the hell would have happened, but the best assumption I can make is they all committed suicide because of guilt. Fuuta in his room, Mahiru in the suicide forest (likely also where her boyfriend committed suicide), and Kazui by jumping off a building like Hinako. As for their evidence...

>Fuuta burns at the end of Backdraft, which is the same thing that happens to Killcheroy, so you could argue that's meant to show he's dying. It's not great, it absolutely is just meant to be metaphorical most likely, but it is there.

Additionally, he's also an outlier for the "muder location image" theory, since what one would consider his "murder location" is very ambiguous. Is it his room, where he sent online hate from? Is it Killcheroy's room, where she assumedly died? Wouldn't it be the front of Killcheroy's house, where Fuuta took the picture to dox her? Again, death location is less ambiguous.

Fuuta's attitude during Trial 1 could be seen as a bit weird if he was suicidal, but I'm not sure we can comfortably say that with the limited information we have.

>Mahiru in I Love You goes to sleep after seeing her boyfriend dead, which could be read as her committing suicide. You know, if you're insane like me.

Especially given this question from Trial 1:

(T1) Q20: What do you think about smoking?

M: I've never smoked before, but I might copy him if who I love smokes.

That, alongside a lot of the bg text from TIHTBILWY, implies Mahiru likes the idea of copying her lover. Not the greatest quality to have when your lover commits suicide.

>Kazui has this:

Where the smoke of his cigarette turns into a noose. Of course, that's meant to represent self-destruction in general, but it could also be taken more literally. He... doesn't have much else.

Thus, everyone else vaguely fits the idea of "death image"... except him.

Our favorite headache inducing doctor strikes again! His card shows a hospital room, which is a very strange death location, but perfectly fits his murders. You could argue he runs into the same issue as Mikoto, but it's actually possible Shidou just killed all his victims in the same room, so.

Yeah, Shidou's probably the biggest counterargument for this theory. Because while it's possible he died in a hospital, there is zero evidence for it, beyond the image itself. Hell, neither Throw Down or Triage ever seems to imply he died in the first place, which is an issue. This theory's already heavily dependant on the extremely flawed "you can't disprove it" argument, but at least most of the other ones have some kind of logical progression which gets you to how they died.

So, to complete the theory, we have to make the pretty big jump that Shidou died inside a hospital room, without knowing how that happened.

... Wait, inside the room?

Wait wait wait, show me Fuuta's and Amane's again.

Hmmm... 0308... hmmmm... 0308... I totally didn't just do this to put the two together... hm...

Yeah, same thing. They both show the inside of a room. Which, along with Shidou's, shows that these images can show the inside of buildings, right?

But, then... why is Yuno's outside?

That very clearly isn't the inside of a building. But this generates a problem for the "murder location image" theory, because Yuno's "murder" was abortion. Even if it wasn't done professionally, she would have still done it inside, presumably. This creates an inconsistency with Fuuta, Amane and Shidou. If their murder locations are shown from inside, why is Yuno different?

However, this inconsistency disappears if we assume the images to be death locations. I previously established if Yuno died, she likely committed suicide by jumping off a staircase, which does vaguely fit this image. It's similar to Kazui's in that way.

Now, I don't want to get too ahead of myself here. Murder location is still absolutely the more straightforward answer, but it does come with its issues. As stated, Fuuta's image would face some ambiguity, Mikoto's would face extreme ambiguity, Amane's seems to contradict the evidence we're shown in Purge March, Yuno's is wildly inconsistent with the other images, and Kotoko's is straight up nonsensical.

Meanwhile, death locations physically work with all the cases, even if Shidou's case is extremely weird, but it requires huge assumptions and stretches. It relies heavily on how impossible it is to disprove, which is not a good sign. Russell's Teapot, and all that.

Summary of the Theory

>Everyone in Milgram is dead, and their prisoner cards in Undercover show the place where they died.

>Prisoner's memories of the events leading up to their deaths are extremely fuzzy, explaining why only Yuno seems to even suspect it.

+Haruka: Committed suicide by drowning himself, possibly in the Shinano river or the sea. [Most likely to be dead]

+Yuno: Committed suicide by jumping off the staircase we see her standing in on her Undercover silhouette shot. [Most likely to be dead]

+Fuuta: Committed suicide in his room out of guilt. [Very little evidence]

+Muu: Murder-suicide, she committed suicide after killing Rei. [A bit more evidence than others]

+Shidou: Died in a hospital room [???]

+Mahiru: "Copied" her boyfriend by killing herself in the suicide forest. [Very little evidence]

+Kazui: Jumped off a building, like Hinako. [Very little evidence]

+Amane: Drowned by her father as "punishment" for her murder. [Unfortunately, sorta likely]

+Mikoto: Murdered by one of the members of Subway Victim's gang. [Sort of filling in the blanks here]

+Kotoko: Murdered at the order of her victim's father. [Very little evidence]

Conclusion

Do I believe this theory? Honestly, I don't know. It makes a few too many assumptions for me to fully believe it, but I do think it's a decent possibility, so I wanted to share it with you all. In any case, that's all I have to say for now. If you have any thoughts about any of this, feel free to share! Also I didn't even touch on Es but you can try to fit them in somehow if you feel like it.

Anyways, if you made it this far, you deserve a hug, this post was depressing. Take care!

#milgram #milgram project #milgram theory #fuuta kajiyama #amane momose #mikoto kayano #shidou kirisaki #haruka sakurai #yuno kashiki #muu kusunoki #mahiru shiina #kazui mukuhara #kotoko yuzuhira

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billpottsismygf · 6 months ago

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Space Babies! Weird episode, but it had a charm. I had already prepared myself for the fact that RTD's era was notoriously camp and weird, and that I would for the first time be experiencing new episodes by him as an adult rather than as a 9-13 year-old, so it's not news to me that there would be some campy nonsense with a deeper message, and that this might be more jarring than I'm used to. The deeper themes were really thrown out (refugees, anti-abortion hypocrisy, genocide, capitalism) without being dwelt on, but that's not necessarily a problem.

The babies themselves were... a little unnerving? The mouth movements were quite uncanny, along with their voices and the general "I love you, Ruby!" of it all. I've just now made the connection that the latter puts me in mind of adverts for baby dolls.

The gunky snot monster felt very early 2000s British children's TV. If you weren't there for that, just know there was so much slime; think Slitheen exploding. I am very glad it got rescued. Nice message with the Doctor not usually running from things just because they look scary and, even though this is a creature specifically manufactured to be scary, it still deserves a shot at life.

It feels like a strange story to start with because I suspect it'll have mixed reviews. I would think you'd want a slightly more solid episode to draw people in with. Anyway, there was still a lot of thought put into making this a proper jumping off point with all its Doctor Who 101 stuff. Funny for a long-time viewer hearing it all rattled off in record time, but important to establish for new people, and I do think it's important for the show to remain accessible to people who haven't been obsessing over it for twenty years or more.

As a jumping off point, it very specifically reminded me of The End of the World. There's the big observation deck on a space station where the new companion, in her second episode and first off-world adventure, gets her phone updated so she can call her mum, in particular. The parallels to Rose are interesting, especially with the lecture the Doctor gives Ruby about how they can't travel back to meet her missing parent(s).

Speaking of that, there's some intrigue there with the snow appearing and the memory changing. I didn't like the Doctor doing a DNA scan of Ruby without her knowledge. It feels very 11th Doctor, especially when he literally scanned Amy and withheld medical information, but also the way he treated all his female companions as mystery boxes to solve without telling them. I guess we'll see what that's all about at a later point.

I'm still not completely sold on Millie Gibson, but Ncuti Gatwa is wonderful, and I do really appreciate their chemistry.

Small things:

Jocelyn was a good character, and the Nan-E filter made me laugh several times.

That place name before the Doctor turned the translation circuits off was absolutely not in English. Slightly weird way to phrase that line if it's going to be called Pacifico del Rio.

This is a very early point in the series for Ruby to get a TARDIS key! We're really speedrunning the usual steps here.

#doctor who #mine #space babies #doctor who spoilers #dwspoilers #dwmine #reactions #rereading this before I post and now 'gunky snot monster' has triggered the chris ramsey 'gunky slime vase' soundbite from taskmaster #dwe15

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leohtttbriar · 1 year ago

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what actually is so jarring about the kira-"pregnancy" plot is that it is very much a narrative version of the violin-player argument in judith jarvis thompson's philosophical defense of abortion. it's an argument that is about how abortion is one thread of legality and personal freedom in the full framework of securing bodily autonomy, so a lot of the argument is not explicitly even about abortion. it posits: "what if one day you wake up and you're connected, with medical tubes and so on, to a violin player (a full adult, with a career and a fully realized person) and the only way this violin player can survive is if you remain connected to them for a month?" then it asks: what if you chose to be connected to this violin player but now you don't want to or you have mixed feelings about it? what if you knew it was a risk from another choice you made? what if halfway through the month you don't want to stay connected? what if it was only an hour? what if was nine months? ultimately, the ethical claim remains: your body is your own. you own your body.

and this is not only important, but it is also interesting. it's the kind of plot star trek writers could write since interrogating the competing values regarding bodily autonomy is a common theme within science-fiction (often treated as a source of the Horrific, but sometimes it's different (see the entirety of octavia butler's oeuvre)). and it would've been especially relevant given that one of the main characters in ds9 is from a society where it is a high honor to take onto the body an entirely other being, and the placement of this other being permanently affects the body such that their removal results in swift death. the enormously complex claims all being made on kira for taking on keiko's pregnancy (from miles and keiko to her own body and person, the threat of death, the threat of connection to the fetus, the treatment she would now receive from others, the treatment she would've received had she refused to take the pregnancy, etc.) should've been talked about, narratively or in dialogue in depth, instead of the vague gestures to the unspoken complexity of the plot and the inside-jokes within production--all of which sort of added up to a weird underlying claim about the exchangability of uteruses across alien-species, as if some mythic universal-womb exists in all "female" persons, and only this magic womb can gestate a fetus despite the whacky technobabble impossible hijinks otherwise present in the star trek narrative reality.

and only jadzia says a single thing about kira having a right to her own body. and it's in a tone-deaf light-hearted scene, where once again the male writers get to indulge in some expression of misogyny by revealing an aspect of ferengi culture that isn't actually that alien to the human world they were writing in (or the plot with kira they were writing), even in that pre-dobbs, mid-90s, ear-plugging left-of-center culture.

#ds9 #oof that post yesterday got me fired up bc to even think about it as a real plot! with feelings and implications! made me feel the loss!#star trek

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pixelatedbugs · 11 months ago

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just completed neutral route! big huge spoilery ramble below summary: definitely recommend playing neutral route because holy shit wow. plus you get some new dialogue and stuff from other characters which is cool

I thought Martlet picking up the determination syringe was an aborted genocide only thing but she had it and i was only level 7...she throws it away of course but it still kinda shocked me. She was already ready to kill Clover if they did anymore violence, even if she changed her mind in the end. And then Flowey just kills her-

Really interesting to me that when Flowey doesn't intervene clover just stays with Toriel. I feel like Clover had a hard life on the surface (based off of Star's couch bringing "unpleasant memories", mainly) I feel like deep down, they wanted comfort. They came down the mountain to find the 5 missing humans but they forgot about that in exchange for Toriel's comfort. A home. They're just a kid. man..

The boss..fuck. I knew it got scary because I accidentally spoiled myself on a few things but wow I was not ready. it really emphasizes the fact that Flowey has complete (not counting the player) control over what happens to clover. Speaking of that, that one scene at the end where Flowey looks directly at the screen..wonder if he realized that him and clover aren't the only ones here. T- DON'T DO THAT CREEPY LAUGH sorry was typing this while watching the credits anyway..

The fight itself was AWESOME. Super creative, the sections where you have to avoid Flowey's vines like Undyne's spears was amazing. The attacks were...creepy as hell Flowey with Humanoid Eyes will stay in my mind for a while. And that's a compliment, the horror factor was nailed here. The battle box lines too. "Clover wants to cry but they don't have eyes" wow! fun! jesus christ. The intermission(?) between the phases. All the other final bosses showed memories of the characters, so it makes sense Flowey would also get those! I'm...not entirely sure what most of it was about besides the part where Asriel first awakens as Flowey ("mom..? dad..?") but holy shit the mountain of dead Floweys was horrifying. Every single reset...damn. Its more likely that Flowey was created a bit before frisk fell, not clover, at least in undertale canon. But still, it really puts into perspective just how many times he died, over and over and over. Plus I'm inserting UTY into my headcanon anyway at this point lmao. oh yeah and then we're in Snowdin! yay it's Martlet! she's speaking slightly weird but I'm sure nothing bad will happen Uh Oh

The second phase is just, really, really good. I didn't expect anything to match Photoshop Flowey but this? Pretty much does it perfectly. i love the different artstyles for every different phase rather than theming around the different souls too. The clay one got me very close to becoming the joker fuck that one

I'm wondering what would've happened if i exited the game at some point, maybe ill redo it later. But yeah, awesome boss, awesome route, definitely go play it yourself. You can just kill like 1 monster and you'll get it i think. ignore the fact that i killed way more than one monster i needed the health ok

#big huge rambles #uty spoilers #undertale yellow spoilers #ut yellow spoilers #undertale yellow #uty #what would you like to do? great! what would you like to do? great! what would you like to do? great! what would you like to do? great! wha #now i can watch shayy do the route yay

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redshoes-blues · 6 months ago

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Alright, now that I’ve watched the new Doctor Who episodes, here are my thoughts (below the cut because it turns out I had a lot to say!):

First, Space Babies:

— I thought it was…okay? It was a serviceable first episode, though I do wonder what the thought process was behind starting an intro season with such a weird concept. Throwing new viewers into the deep end?

— Lots of exposition, and I feel it could’ve been done a bit more naturally, but it isn’t a big deal. I’m watching the show with my brother who is twelve and new to DW (he’s only seen Nine’s season), so that infodump was helpful for him and new viewers even if it could’ve been handled a bit better.

— THE RANI MENTION!! Obviously exciting, but I may be even more intrigued by the lack of mention of the Master. Clearly lots of hard feelings there.

— The butterfly thing. Okay. What was happening when Ruby transformed into that green creature? I have many questions. Maybe it was just an example of a butterfly effect, but why is she that creature? Because it was a Changling she was swapped with? Sometimes things fly over my head so who knows.

— Major uncanny valley with the babies, which kind of made me wish they went a bit more in a horror direction with them, but ah well.

— WAS THAT CORUSCANT?! Maybe not *literal* Coruscant, but it has to be a reference, right? I mean, they referenced Star Trek too!

— I immediately adore Fifteen and Ruby’s dynamic. They have wonderful best friends energy and Ncuti has already proven himself as an amazing Doctor.

— Very intrigued by both the snow (clearly a recurring thing) and the DNA scan the Doctor is doing at the end of the episode.

— In terms of the snow, I wasn’t expecting to get emotional so early on in this series, but that and the scene where the Doctor is talking to the baby about his past made me well up. Beautiful writing there in an otherwise pretty silly episode.

— The little call-out of how hypocritical anti-abortion people are. Love to see it.

— Also the babies never being hugged before?! I’m sorry but that’s so devastating oh my god.

— Clearly a major theme of the series is going to be adoption, where the Doctor and Ruby came from, as well as their found families. I’m a huge sucker for found family, so I’m quite excited to see this inevitably come up again throughout the season.

— I love RTD for refusing to ignore that the Timeless Child is a thing that happened, and not only for that, but also for actively working to make it a serviceable aspect of the Doctor’s character now. It wouldn’t have been my choice for a plot, but it’s here, and I’m glad it isn’t being retconned. And I love how it parallels Ruby’s story. Also: the line about the baby Doctor being left in the void of space was so sad.

— I enjoyed the callbacks to The End of the World!

— Overall, the episode was fine, nothing special, but there were some lovely moments.

The Devil’s Chord

— Okay. WOW. I loved this episode so much. This is by far my favourite of all the episodes we’ve gotten with Fifteen and Ruby, and I can see it becoming a new favourite in general too.

— I loved when Fifteen and Ruby stepped out of the TARDIS and we got a little Abbey Road moment. Expected? Yes. But it was very adorable.

— Maestro was an incredible villain and Jinkx was giving everything!! Are they a child of the Toymaker? I feel like that was sort of implied, but either way they’re definitely part of his liege. I’m sure we’ll be seeing many more of the people connected to him throughout the series.

— Conceptually, I loved this. I love when DW takes a big concept asks questions. Like what would the world be like without this thing that’s so integral to humanity that we take for granted? It reminded me a little bit of the Yesterday movie (“what if the Beatles’ music didn’t exist?”) if it was good and thoughtful lol.

— I loved the slight corniness of seeing the world without music and how devastating that is. It made me cry seeing Ruby and Fifteen in the 2024 post-nuclear earth without music. And then seeing the joy Ruby’s song brought to people?! That song itself was absolutely beautiful and I’m so thrilled Murray Gold is back because wow. Stunning. Made me cry!

— We also learn that it’s June (or July?) 2024 now, which means they’ve been travelling for about six months. That’s quite a substantial chunk of time that we haven’t seen. Which leaves a lot of wiggle room for Big Finish audios. And that’s always welcome!

— The Doctor’s soul is split in two?! Woah. That’s a big deal and was brushed over really fast? Which is fine, maybe we won’t come back to that. But that in itself is very interesting.

— The Harbinger again. Hmmm.

— Also: Susan Twist again? What is happening!! She appeared in the previous episodes too.

— Ruby and Fifteen’s outfits were so fuckin good, I know so many people will cosplay them and look incredible doing it. I need Ruby’s dress badly.

— The part when Maestro was trying to steal Ruby’s song inside of her soul (very cool concept) and CAROL OF THE BELLS PLAYED OH MY GOD. The callbacks to the church are crazyyy and I’m so intrigued. I’m loving the mystery.

— SUSAN MENTIONED! All of these classic who references…Susan, other Time Lords, etc. are making me wondering if they’re just unsubtle easter eggs OR if they’re building towards something.

— Maestro referred to Ruby as a “creature” which is another tidbit that may point to her not being human, which I’m very intrigued by.

— I enjoyed the fourth wall breaks, which were slightly unsettling and especially the theme song beginning in piano which was such a cool callback to the original DW theme.

— THE SNOW IN THE TARDIS?! What is happening omg. The collision of that memory into the current time where Ruby is…what’s going on?! I’m scared but so, so invested.

— Musical number at the end was so much fun. Was it necessary? Not at all. But it was good camp fun and that’s why I watch DW, so I’m here for it!!

— There’s definitely more I’m forgetting to mention because this episode had a lot packed into it, but basically I loved it so much and am adoring Ruby and Fifteen as a duo. This was strong writing and a great episode for me!

#doctor who #space babies #the devil’s chord #long post #dw thoughts #dw spoilers

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andmaybegayer · 2 months ago

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Last Monday of the Week 2024-09-23

I have a normal number of tabs open

Listening: Went to a metal show I knew nothing about because my partner was going and I figured it would be a good way to hear what they're into.

Nest of Plagues is a Hungarian outfit, which I liked a fair amount. Bad mix from their sound engineer but otherwise fun. I have no idea what any of the songs they played are so here's a random one:

Next up, Lone Survivors, a French prog metal group. Really fun, great bass

Then Science of Decay, Swiss group. Probably the most consistently good.

And the headliners who were Orphaned Land, an Israeli pan-religious peace themed band? Bizzare on many levels. What is the point of non-blasphemous metal.

Pretty good show all around, I'm not a huge metalhead so other than like "pretty good, some of this is nice" I have very little to say.

Reading: A Desolation Called Peace which is a delicious little thing. A really different book from Memory, and makes very efficient use of its scenes to handle a lot of information very deftly.

It's a bold move to do the like, barest intimations of a relationship in book one, ends with a single kiss. Book two: starts with them deeply estranged on the other side of the galaxy from each other, midpoint fucking, endpoint ???????.

The Eight Antidote scenes are clever! The sanitized self-concept of the empire in this one kid. There's a bit about the "Atrocities Teixcalaan had smartly given up committing" it's such a great line

Watching: Finished Mobile Suit Gundam. which was interesting and educational for multiple things, for one just as a reference for a bunch of other media I've consumed.

I want to compare it a little to Avatar, which is good but suffers heavily from the constraints of being a Western Children's Show, Gundam is a toy advert like Transformers but it doesn't feel the need to lean into "here is your moral lesson of the week" stuff so it can do some really thoughtful storytelling about war and duty.

The instrumentalization of the whole White Base Crew where they're just taken on as an expendable force by Earth is so great because it keeps them at a distance from both sides while still putting them on A Side.

The Newtype stuff towards the end both focuses the story and sort of weakens it? It moves you away from the drama and struggle of the crew into building this universe lore.

I'm probably going to jump ahead to Witch from Mercury and then maybe watch some of the past seasons.

Making: Some abortive microscope stuff, ran into weird power issues, need to fix that. Fiddling with VR projects but nothing meaningful, I wanted to try and work on some 3D curve visualization stuff but I mostly got bogged down remembering how VR on Linux works again.

Playing: Fell off Tactical Breach Wizards but I'm back, pushing through the final act. It's going well and I'm getting Rion under me, he's pretty finicky at times but very powerful.

Tools and Equipment: A consideration for you: if you have weird neck pain check your pillow. Ever since my partner spent a few nights at my place they found their neck pain gone because I use good normal pillows made of firm foam rather than bullshit sad feather sacks that compress down to one centimeter thick and do fuck-all for your neck. I do not know who thought down pillows was a good idea, stop doing that. You need to keep your neck supported!

#last monday of the week #Bandcamp

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avonsdrabbles · 6 months ago

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Hi! I seem to have rambled on to your blog

Weird question! How did you get into (if you ever did) examining and taking apart literature?

For us it's Merlin BBC cuz nothing new has come out for it in over a decade. It's 5 seasons long but at some point you just run out of content but yk, still wanting to talk about it we started drawing on narrative themes picking apart and inspecting the dialogue to figure out each character's intention. I'm glad to say it held up really well

& we're asking people whom have interacted with the degree that forces literature upon you how they started cuz it's interesting

On ask? On my main? It's more likely than you'd think--

Anyways, hi, love the snakes, love the planet, love the ask! It's unsurprisingly a little complicated for me, so bear with me.

I knew I liked English in middle school, but that wasn't dissecting text, that was writing. But that's where a love for language formed, and I started writing more and more. Back then, tho, I HATED dissecting literature, because it felt so pointless. "What did the author mean by this?" I don't know, I can't ask them, Margie! Ugh.

But then, I had the worst English teacher in my entire life in high school. She was, simply put, batshit. She rambled on and on about how fairies were going to take her soul and stole kids things, how cameras were the work of the devil and could also take your soul, how English would heal people's souls...

Really obsessed with souls ngl. Bit weird.

Anyways -- she was god awful. And she changed the curriculum multiple times so we could read what she wanted. The year I was supposed to read Romeo and Juliet, we read Midsummer Nights Dream instead. And by god, everything this woman said pissed me the fuck off. SHE FOCUSED ON THE IMABS? IMABIC PENTAMETERS???? I'm sorry, woman, can we discuss the puns here?! Can we discuss the authorial context of Shakespeare making this play within a play something commoners could enjoy while mocking nobility and the scandals at play, while (sorry, foaming at the mouth in rage and lust over literature).

Needless to say, I dove straight in. I'm one of the lucky ones who could understand Shakespeare without trying. It didn't take any energy on my part to parse the iambs, and I found a lot of beauty in the poetic nature of it all.

The next year, I was ready to fight, but I promptly had the best English teacher of my entire life, the one who taught me more about teaching than anyone else, and who I cite as the reason I became an English teacher. And she really fucking opened my eyes to the intricacies of subjectiveness in English. See, I'm a very stubborn person, and I'm very my-way-or-the-highway. I used to be very mathmatically inclined because there's only one right answer. Sure, you can get that answer a lot of different ways, but only one thing is right. English frustrated me because it seemed like I could say any fucking bullshit and have someone nod and say "Profound."

This is the teacher that taught me that's a feature, not a bug.

Through a little something called Waiting For Godot.

It is, by far, the worst play I've read. It's also my favorite. What sort of 10th grader gets to read an analysis of God that features pet play BDSM? THIS one. (This was also outside of the standard curriculum, but it was the end of the year, so all bets were off I guess).

This was the play where we dove in, read it, and without any discussion of the play, had to write an essay about the theme the author was presenting. All of us felt so lost. The symbolism didn't make any sense. There seemed to be no theme, beyond maybe "Waiting for someone who will never come is painful."

And then, the day before we had to write the essay... We had a substitute, following her lesson plans, and he was one of my favorite SEIAs (special ed instructional assistants). He was the exact same level of batshit as I am.

He SLAMMED his hand on the whiteboard, stared at us as we looked back in shock, and screamed, "ABORTION." He then went into a 40 minute diatribe about how the author of the text was very clearly explaining pro-life VS pro-choice mentality, leaning pro-life, but conversely making a pro-choice argument through the use of the discussion of Christian free will. He used sources. He used text evidence. By the end of the talk, all of us were nodding, clapping, acknowledging that he HAD to be correct!

And he stopped, stared at us, and laughed. "That was all bullshit."

He'd pulled it all out of his ass. And it made perfect sense to us all.

That's when I figured out that literature is what YOU make of it. Literature is all about interpretation; sure, there's tropes to follow that help guide our interpretations, but at the end of the day, words mean whatever you think they mean.

THAT'S what got me into lit analysis.

(And, oddly, homestuck)

#teacher rant #writing rant #literature rant #FUCK I LOVE ENGLISH

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alienelvisobsession · 2 years ago

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THIRST WATCH #5: “Change of Habit”

In “Change of Habit”, Elvis plays Dr. John Carpenter, a doctor in a difficult neighborhood who is helped at the clinic by three nuns in incognito and is attracted to one of them, Sister Michelle (Mary Tyler Moore). I don’t know if he consciously wanted to play the jaded overworked doctor who has has seen too many things, but Elvis in this movie looks bored and is acting on autopilot, apart from maybe the scene where he plays football in the park. If that was an acting choice, there should be a scene that explains why he seemed so disgruntled. The sets look embarrassingly cheap and unfortunately the story, even though written with good intentions, failed to entertain me or interest me. I’m afraid that Elvis didn’t enjoy filming this movie, so it seems to me that he wasn’t making much of an effort to act: he delivers his lines as quickly as he can, as if he were almost embarrassed by them.

This was filmed in what with my Discord Besties we call Elvis’ Silky period (1968-1970) , but he looks like freaking Spock sometimes when he’s wearing scrubs. “Live long and prosper, Elvis!”. I wonder if anybody told him that or if he realized watching himself. Would he have laughed at it or would he be pissed off? I already imagine myself being dragged by the hair and kicked out of Graceland by a Spock-looking Elvis! He needed a “Change of Hair”, not a “Change of Habit”! Seriously, those short bangs don’t suit him and his hair is combed too neatly. His hair weirdly changes from scene to scene, but overall I don’t even find him that hot in much of this movie, just attractive. Perhaps that’s because Dr. Sideburns is a boring character without much of a backstory and for the most part he lacks emotions, just like Spock. It’s honestly more fun to think about Elvis in a Star Trek episode (he was a fan)! Who would he play, Spock’s son? Or one of the red shirts who always get killed at the beginning of the episode? What about one the weird alien races on a planet of Elvii who all wiggle their legs and have incredibly long fingers? Okay, now I need about a fanfic about Elvis in a Star Trek episode, lol. 😂

Now back go the movie. The jokes made me cringe, even acknowledging this was 1969. Example: “The last few nurses who worked here couldn't handle it. Two of 'em got raped! One of them even against her will." Here they’re trying to say that unwanted pregnancies are a problem in the neighborhood, only partially because of sexual assault, but the issue is tackled with the same poor taste as Elvis’ hairdresser. Was Larry Geller around for this movie? Because this is kind of an early helmet in some scenes!

Elvis plays a serious doctor, but in my opinion the character is too goody goody for him. There’s a disconnect between the subject of the song “Rubberneckin’”, where Elvis seemingly sings about liking a lot of different girls and being alright with it, and the character of a single doctor in his early 30s in love with a nun with a very traditional view of relationships and marriage (the two don’t even kiss). If I were the scriptwriter, I would have flipped the roles and made Elvis a “hot priest” that you can’t totally read, like Andrew Scott in “Fleabag”.

“Change of Habit” tries to be socially conscious, but very clumsily. The main plot is an aborted rom-com, but minor themes are inequality, criminality in poor neighborhoods, changes in society and black power. Elvis deserved more dramatic roles, but with well-written round character and good plots. I must admit, though, that I liked the scene where he wears Converse sneakers, jeans, a University of Memphis sweatshirt and plays football in the park. He probably had fun filming that and he looks very modern.

During his time at the clinic, Dr. Sideburns deals with a stuttering boy, a drug addict and an autistic girl. It’s interesting to think that Elvis might have been all of these three things. No comment on that scene with the autistic girl, because they didn’t know how to deal with autism back then. Some fans are thrilled that issues of sexual assault, race and autism are addressed in an Elvis movie. While I agree that this is good for issues of representation, that’s not enough for me to make it a good movie, especially when these things are mentioned awkwardly in an attempt to update these vehicles to the progressive counterculture of the late ‘60s in a way that doesn’t move the ostensibly very basic “will-they-won’t-they” plot forward. This movie just made me uncomfortable, instead of being either fun or thought-provoking (or both). It didn’t help that serious issues are handled with throwaway one-liners like “I think our neighbors are Catholic. – Yes. It's too bad they're not Christian”. It’s not that I’m applying modern standards to an old movie: this for me was simply poorly written. It’s trying to attach socially-progressive issues to a vapid rom-com.

The best thing to come out of this movie for me is this meme of Dr. Sideburns that I made. Tell me if it doesn’t sound like El ad-libbing a line here:

The ending is like that of “King Creole”: they couldn’t really make up their mind, so they left it a bit ambiguous. Elvis doesn’t end up with the girl, but they want to leave it open if you want to think that he will in the future. This frustrates me because, unlike what happens in “King Creole”, the only conflict in this movie other that the clinic is in a tough neighborhood is that the doctor is attracted to the young nun.

It doesn’t even have a good Gospel number at the end, because these people are boring Catholics, like me. At a certain point, Elvis plays “Lawdy Miss Clawdy” at the piano (which would also be slightly out of character for Dr. Carpenter), but he doesn’t sing the words, maybe because of budget problems with the rights of the song, who knows! He looks so good in those elegant clothes. He’s suddenly unspocked!

Overall, I didn’t like the movie. Sorry for being this harsh and I know that there are Elvis fans who really love “Change of Habit” and that’s fine, but for me it’s a weird hybrid between a light-hearted and a socially-conscious movie and it didn’t work. This movie was boring, predictable and Elvis was sleepwalking through it. Sorry El, it wasn’t your fault. You deserved better. You wanna know how to fix this? Watch “Sister Act”.

Here’s a link to my other Thirst Watches, including “King Creole”, “Jailhouse Rock”, “Blue Hawaii” and “Flaming Star”.

#elvis #elvis presley #elvis movie #thirst watch #change of habit #1960s movies #star trek #spock

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stevensavage · 8 months ago

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Punching A Hole Through My Head Into Myself

(This column is posted at www.StevenSavage.com, Steve's Tumblr, and Pillowfort. Find out more at my newsletter, and all my social media at my linktr.ee)

A few of my regular readers know I have side projects under various pen names. We creative types all know the need to be ourselves by being someone else for various financial, marketing, or personal reasons. Sometimes those other selves teach us lessons.

It may surprise some of my readers that I’ve started doing art under one of my pen names. Not book cover art which everyone knows, or my abortive attempts at learning to draw by hand. I’ve gotten into digital art and fusion, with legacies such as midcentury modern (naturally), branding, punk, surrealism, and more. Some of it might find it’s way here, of course, but now it thrives in a more private space.

As I started doing art, I noticed my themes were deep, often disturbing, often profound, and always weird. Very honestly, had you shown this stuff to me a few years ago I wouldn’t have guessed it came from me. Now it came out with the gesture of a mouse and the click of a button, thoughts on religion and humanity that had an edge you rarely see in my writing.

This art also felt right, felt proper, felt real.I was expressing something within me. Yet when I grasped for the words to say what I was expressing, it was difficult. I didn’t know how to easily describe what was coming out in my digital art experiments.

Then I realized that visual art gave me a way to express ideas and parts of myself that my writing did not. I had an entire different language to express a side of me previously left to feelings, to vague allusions, and over-or-under descriptions. What once took careful and oft failed engineering of words came out in black and white, in filters and shapes.

I had taken up experimenting with art and given part of me a new language to reach peope. I also was far more aware of sides of myself, of feelings, of opinions, now that I had a new way to express them. I knew myself better.

This is why I think it is critical for people to learn an art of any kind – writing, music, drawing, something. Learn to express, learn to create, learn to let yourself out. There are things we need to give voice to in order to both reach people and reach ourselves.

It is also important that we creatives, no matter our chosen method, keep experimenting and broadening. A writer should try art, an artist should try music, a musician writing, and so on. We are always finding out more about ourselves, and each artistic method is a new way for the real us to come out. You don’t have to be professional or even be good, but you should explore, have fun, and see what happens.

Where’s my art going to go? I have no idea and that’s not the point. I’m going to see what happens – and I’m going to get to know who is watching this happen much better. In time, we might get to know them better together.

Steven Savage

www.StevenSavage.com

www.InformoTron.com

#inspiration #creativity #art #psychology

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returntosaturn271995 · 11 months ago

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December 20th-25th: Holiday Roundup

This year is a definite improvement over last year. For one thing I'm not crying over a break-up and a lost job. Lately, things have just had a lot of potential, and thanks to a well-placed Botox needle and my commitment to sunscreen and hydration: I have aged backward (I'm sure).

Reading: Finally finished "Shrines of Gaiety" - very Peaky Blinders with a dash of Agatha Christie and at 450 pages, not a small feat. I love ambiguous endings, happy or unhappy. I will definitely read more Kate Atkinson. I'm in the middle of "You Are More than You Think You Are" (daily meditations, meant to be consumed slowly), "Sapiens" (600 pages on all of human history, casual), and was gifted two more Samantha Irby essay collections from Zach and Natalie for Christmas. In order to hit my 50 book goal next year, I've got to get 5 down in January.

Writing: Before I'm out of this year, I am transferring all the written quotes from my well-worn journal into three places. The jokes are going into my tight ten, the stories are all getting dumped into a narrative doc, maybe even a Google Drive for organization, and my daily inspirational quotes I'll crib for the next notebook. Maybe I'll even write some of them hear and rank how great of advice I think it is in hindsight/how I can improve upon it. Also I have very much enjoyed how good I've been about Journaling this year, starting in March it got really consistent and that's where the progress got better too. That's the thing about journals: they have the side effect of turning your life into a narrative (even if it's a boring one) and then you can start to find a way to root for the main character. God forbid, you could even learn to improve her behavior (except for all the dirty stuff because let's face it, that's fun).

Cooking: Ugh. This one is brutal. I'm trying to order less takeout and it's like taking a banana away from a gorilla. Except I'm the gorilla and the banana taker. My likely insane goal is to not order takeout for the rest of the year, but how about we (me and the voices in my head) allow me to order it on the 27th? One more time for the day I'm least likely to have groceries/the will to grocery shop.

But also really Erin? You can't make it 9 days without ordering food.

...

I don't know. We'll have to see.

For the family's '70s-themed Christmas party, I made Dad's green bean casserole with potato chips as breadcrumbs. This was actually an unnaturally impressive feat as our kitchen was filled with people, dishes, incorrect ingredients (used buckwheat flour in a pinch) and the burners and oven were temperamental at best.

Political Awareness: Donald Trump is just fully quoting Hitler now. Abortion rights and regulations are cruel (and bigger in texas).

Loving Relationships: Mom and I spent a day together shopping at Stanford for Dad's present (a space-themed lego set because he is a child at heart). Dad and I watched Love Actually with George (giant German shepherd, settled between us as a very unlikely lap dog). We spent Christmas Eve at Barb and Jack's who are basically the godparents I never had. Lauren and Eric came over with Rosie who is just now starting to walk and talk and IS in fact the love of my life. Ash and Zach braved a visit from their Dad and Zach, Natalie, and I shared a joint on the porch. Got a Schitt's Creek Monopoly game and Chanel Perfume from the White Elephant and Dad respectively. Lots of family love. Lots of Mess.

Saw Nathan (from the Southwest flight) in Palo Alto and we ended up driving back to SF together and making out all night. His new place is gorgeous and weird like most San Francisco apartments. There's even a little rabbit in a hutch outside.

Getting Outside: Stanford is beautiful, Half Moon Bay is gorgeous, and I love the look of the Redwood trees. My goal is to go on a hike before I leave...but I leave in 2 days so that goal may have to take a backseat to me sitting and watching old seasons of Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.

Dressing with Style: I rocked the '70s theme with high tops, acid-wash jeans, and a loud Apres Ski-style sweatshirt. There was also a delightfully tacky tree headband that lit up. Lauren also gave me a ton of her old clothes because the woman has a shopping addiction. Not that I'm complaining- I'm currently organizing and tallying everything. I'm going to have to ship some of this stuff separately.

Cleaning/Organization: This place is a zoo, but I've managed to keep my private space as neat as possible. Even making my bed even though the bed keeps changing because it's chaotic here. I've also managed to get mass amounts of laundry done and a set of dishes in the kitchen. Also in January, I'm going to have cleaners come in for the kitchen and bathroom (and maybe my room while they're there.) Organized spaces = organized mental states.

Yoga: My yoga has been on and off, but stretching is key. Even if it's only 10-15 minutes at a time. Even if it's only 3 minutes. My mat isn't here with me but I can groan over my hamstrings on the carpet- I assume. Haven't actually done it since I got on the plane.

Cardio: I walked barefoot on the treadmill to Christmas music for a mile and it was weirdly life-affirming. Any walk is a walk. And I also downloaded an app called TreeCard that plants a tree for every 10,000 steps you take. I'm currently at two tress because mama loves a walk. Also got reunited with my running shoes I left here last month and plan to purchase another pair in the new year.

Meditation: Kept up with it 5/7 days this week which isn't as amazing as I have been doing, but it's always a great reminder to drop vertically in the moment instead of constantly reaching for a distraction as a form of release. Meditation is healing and important. It stretches time.

Comedy: While I haven't really written any new stuff, I've definitely enjoyed watching a ton of Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and general funny shit. I need to find a different angle in to incorporating it in to my routine.

Sleep/Hydration: I'm actually so impressed with how my sleep sorted itself out naturally with the new job/and how much tea throughout the day helps me feel physically and emotionally lighter.

Job: Looks like I'm getting a raise mothahfuckahs!

Good shit is coming. I am so so so so lucky.

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sunnysepulchre · 5 years ago

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Meanwhile I watched In The Tall Grass today on a coworkers recommendation and while it was,, good. I guess. It would have been better if it had not felt like an hour and a half long pro-life commercial.

#text #it had some abortion themes that were very weird #protestantchristian weird overtones that would have been fine i guess #without the first part #there are a lot of trigger warnings for it honestly hmu if you choose to delve into #... that

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ehbeeseedih · 3 years ago

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Lost a bet - positions

Prompt:

So you lost a bet and posted that you wanted to try out some sex positions and were looking for volunteers. As soon as you were allowed, you were going to go delete it, but then you looked at the replies. Who said they wanted to do each one with you?

How it works:

Go to “Random.org”.

Click on “Lists & More” and then “Lists Randomised”.

Enter the names of 18+ people/characters.

Use the first 10 to find out who volunteered for each one.

PS: This is my first time posting on tumblr so the sizes of things, font and all those kinda things might be a little wacky, but I’ll try to fix it afterwards.

You can check out my other stories at AFF. Now, enjoy reading 10 bad smuts to fulfill your daily bad smuts quota.

Oh yeah nearly forgot, thanks to @existslikepristin for the tag.

Rosé - Missionary

“Everything I need is on the ground.”

The music ends, the ending pose done, everyone claps. Today is the last day of practice before Rosé’s solo debut tomorrow afternoon.

You went to the showers in the dance studio after debriefing. A cold shower does wonders for relieving body ache after intense practice sessions.

As you prepared to leave the studio, you saw Rosé still practicing by herself, wearing the tight short skirt outfit she’s about to perform in tomorrow.

Rosé bent forward as the music reached the chorus, her safety shorts failed to adequately cover up her butt cheeks as they came into your view. Your pants abruptly got tight at the sight.

You desperately try to divert your attention as Rosé caught you staring at her. Instead of calling you out about it, she began twerking harder, letting her plump butt freely bounce in front of you.

“Like what you’re seeing?”

“Yes…..” You shyly replied

“Well I could use some releasing, haven’t had a cock for a while.”

She lowered her skirt and panties in a single stroke, “How you like that?”

“Huh?”

“I mean how would you like to fuck me?”

“Missionary please, I’d like to see your face.”

She lays down on the floor and spreads her legs wide, “Vanilla huh, I like it. I’m already on the ground, what are you waiting for?”

You’ve finally realised the true meaning of “Everything I need is on the ground”. Let’s just hope that both of you won’t be too tired to perform tomorrow.

Doggy - IU

Having a bubbly and needy girlfriend like Jieun can be both a blessing and a curse.

The blessing, a very fulfilling sex life, anytime and anywhere.

The curse, it’s hard to reject her when she wants them but you don’t. Her aegyos and delicate moans were like cheat codes that made you do whatever she told you to.

In the present, you’re faced with two very major problems you had to deal with. On one hand, you had a report and 2 proposal you needed to turn in by tomorrow

On the other hand, you had a needy girlfriend who’s willing to do anything to get you to fuck her.

Jieun had been doing everything she could to get you off work and pay attention to her. She started with strip tease, lap dance, progressing to slowly jerking you off and giving you a messy blowjob.

You had nearly given up, a few moans escaped your mouth, but in the end you were still working, and Jieun was also still working. She released your cock from her mouth and went to the bed.

Immediately, you heard sounds of wet flesh and Jieun’s soft moans.

“Ahhhh, why are you still working? You could be here balls deep in me. Ahhhhh, it would be better if it’s your giant cock inside me instead of my slim finger.”

That nearly tempted you off. Your cock was growing hard again, your hand slowly stroking it along to the beat of Jieun’s moans.

“Look at me!” She shouted. In hindsight, you shouldn’t have looked. The moment you turn your head, there is no going back.

Jieun was on all fours, her fingers in her pussy slowly pumping off.

“Come fuck your little slut. Look at how wet I am for you.”

Magnetized by her pussy, you gave up work and went over and grabbed her hips.

“You nasty little slut, distracting me from doing actual work. Now let me punish you.”

“Oh yeah, punish your little slut. Fill her with your cum and send her to heaven.”

Suffice to say your bosses were not impressed when you said you had to take care of your pet yesterday and couldn’t finish your work.

Cow girl - Jessica

Why are you in a 5 star hotel again? Oh yeah, you were at a family gathering with your wife Jessica.

But why does she look so mad? Did you piss her off doing something stupid again?

“Do you know why I’m mad right now?”

“No……” A ringing slap on your left cheek.

“Please explain why were you fucking my sister during the family gathering?”

Oh yeah, now you remember. Krystal was seducing you during dinner, which ended up with you getting caught by Jessica while cumming inside Krystal in their family house bathroom.

“Well……. Krystal was seducing me, and you did say it’s ok to touch your sister right?” A ringing slap on your right cheek.

“I said only when I’m not available. I was prepared to give you a surprise but you decided to be a bad boy.”

Jessica took off her bathrobe and revealed the red lacy lingerie underneath it.

Red - the ultimate colour of seduction. Jessica certainly knew how to get you fired up. Luckily for you, you too knew how to get her fired up.

Hug her hips, hand on her butt, face in front of her pussy “I’m sorry mommy, I have been a bad boy, please forgive me.”

“Ahhhh” Jessica moaned and pushed you down onto the bed hard. “You’ve been a really bad boy. Now let me ride you.”

“Yes. Please mommy.”

69 - Miyeon

“Hey Miyeon, look at me! I’m sliding down the slide upside down.”

She ignored you.

Miyeon had been acting all weird today. Like she was pretty weird normally but today even more so.

She told you she wanted to do something fun today, and then she brought you out to a playground in the middle of nowhere.

Was she going through nostalgia and wanted to relive her childhood? That doesn’t seem like it. She had been looking around scanning the area ever since you got here. What was she looking for, there’s nothing and no one in the vicinity.

“Hey baby, what are you doing?”

She approaches you with a smirk and grabs your crotch, gently rubbing it.

“Baby, I told you I want to do something fun right. Let’s fuck right here. Nobody is watching.”

“What…….” Before you could speak, Miyeon had unzipped your pants and started sucking your already hard cock.

“Can you at least let me sit upright first?”

“No, 69 is part of the fun. Now shut up and eat my pussy.”

“You’re one kinky girl Miyeon.”

Downward dog - Shuhua

You loved your job as a yoga instructor, and having your classes famous among idols is a huge reason for it.

It started out with Yerin and your extra sessions. Apparently she liked it so much that she introduced Joy to join your extra sessions too.

Since then, idols had been coming so frequently that you’ve had to space out the appointments as your body couldn’t keep up with the number of sessions.

Last week it was Yves and Chuu and this week it will be Shuhua.

“Hi Shuhua, how are you feeling today?”

“Great, just a bit stiff. I’ll need some help with stretching later, maybe your pole can be handy.”

“Alright, do you want to start off slow or go straight to the extra sessions.”

“Be fast please, I’m impatient.”

“Alright then, let’s start off with the downward dog pose. Put your hand on the floor and raise your hips up.”

“Good, looks like you have been following my advice and putting in extra work. Your thighs look very meaty.”

“I’ve been doing a lot of leg work recently.”

“I’ll message your butt and help you relax your muscles.”

“It feels great, please don’t stop.”

“What is this Shuhua, why is there a wet spot in between your thighs?”

“Ahhh, don’t tease me please.”

“Oh no, no panties. You’re a naughty student. Let me punish you.”

“Yes please, use your cock to help me stretch out my thigh pussy.”

Side saddle - Yuju

Some come to the beach for the relieving feeling, some for the tan, some for the sea breeze. But you’re here for the bikinis and tiddies.

Sitting under your beach umbrella, you can usually see a whole beach of beauties enjoying themselves. But not today.

The beach is desolate today, not much to see. Just the occasional family with nothing impressive, not the usual group of eye candies.

The weather is beginning to turn and you prepare to abort. Just as you’re about to leave, you spot a lady sporting a red bikini slowly approaching from afar, heading towards your direction.

As she nears, you observe her fit body, her abs and her beautiful appearance.

“Hey, why are you here at the beach?”

“I came here for a walk. But it seems like the weather today is not cooperative.”

“That’s unfortunate, maybe we can do something together to create some memories and remedy that.”

She scans your body. Instinctively, you flex up your abs.

“Alright, but we do it my way.”

She sits on top of your crotch which starts pumping up with blood. You scan around for one more time to ensure no one is watching.

While you scout, Yuju is busy relieving your cock from your pants and inserting it through her bikini bottom.

She begins bouncing on you slowly. The cold winds contrasted with the interior warmth of her pussy, heightening the experience.

Some come to the beach for the relieving feeling, some for the bikini and tiddies. But you’re here for the fuck.

Throat Swab - Jiho

A rich heiress by the name of Jiho has recently come under your radar. Her mansion was outside of the town and she lives really lowkey.

Made a rough survey of her mansion, it seems relatively lightly guarded given her wealth. No one except her servants went in and out of the mansion, not even Jiho herself had left the mansion throughout the few days.

Clock struck 12, sneaked into the mansion from the back door without anyone noticing

Circling around the mansion, surprised by how empty it is inside given the luxurious exterior. The heiress living inside must be pretty lonely.

Made your way to the master bedroom. Jiho sleeping elegantly in her princess themed bed.

Tied her up on her bed with ropes

Ransacked her mansion, took away many valuables. Heard a loud scream from the master bedroom

With lightning speed, headed to the source of the sound. Found Jiho struggling with her hands tied up

“What are you doing, let me go.”

“Shut up you nasty bi*** “ Placed your palm on her face to quiet her.

Instead of resisting, Jiho surprisingly licked your palm in a circular motion, her eyes telling you of her desire

Stuck your fingers into her mouth and she dutifully sucked it with vigour.

“You’re a needy little slut I see. You’re being kidnapped and yet you’re sucking my fingers”

“It has been a long time since I've seen a man. It’s natural to be needy.”

Released her, knowing she won’t run away. Brought her to the edge of the bed with her head hanging from the bed.

“I still need to keep you quiet, maybe I should stuff your mouth with my cock”

“Please fuck my mouth, please.”

Pearly Gates - Arin

You’ve always thought Arin was the good girl type. The type that would be shy about sex.

However, after a date started off with her sucking you off in the car, feet playing with your cock under the restaurant table, ass grinding on your crotch in an elevator and her hand guiding yours while touching her pussy in the cinema, you threw away all your dumb assumptions.

After a libidinous date, you came home utterly exhausted and immediately fell into your bed.

As you slowly dozed off to dreamland, Arin crashes on top of you, waking you up.

Instinctively you moved your hand to embrace her whilst both of you gradually drifted into slumber.

Your legs suddenly felt numb and a need to move them. Finding your legs trapped under Arin’s legs, the only way to move them was to spread out her legs.

Your legs slowly spreaded Arin’s legs out and you heard a barely audible moan from her.

Arin turned around with a soft smile and raspy voice “You still got juice to try out a new position?” and began grinding her posterior on you to get you in the mood again.

You quickly moved to remove the bottoms for the both of you “What’s this new position you’re talking about?”

“It’s called pearly gates, I learned it from reading a smut challenge.”

She impaled herself on your cock from above as you felt her being more tight in this position

The sex was great, and lucky for you Arin did not eat much for dinner.

Stand and Carry - Minju

“Ha, you suck at Mario Kart.”

“Yeah, yeah, you won. What do you want?”

“Carry me to the ice cream shop.”

“Can’t you walk yourself? You’re heavy, you know.” Despite bickering, you willingly bent down and told Minju to get on your back.

However, she refused and insisted on being carried on the front.

Minju wrapped her legs around your waist and you felt her moist core pushed up against your crotch.

“No panties?”

“Shut up, just go.”

You’re sure she already felt it but your cock was rock hard and bulging out after knowing your girlfriend’s kinky behavior.

As you carried her towards the store, every little movement and vibration of a step caused your clothed bulge to rub against Minju’s bare pussy.

Minju tried her best to hold back her moans but occasionally some slipped out which attracted the attention of people nearby.

Not only do you have to deal with the weird glances from the passersby, but also your internal desire to fuck Minju then and there.

At the last 100 meters, Minju’s soft moans suddenly became a deep groan, her whole body gripped on yours as she orgasms. A gush of fluid wettens your pants on the crotch area.

Just as Minju recovered from her bliss, you spotted an empty alley and headed there.

Making quick work of your pants with Minju still hanging on you, you swiftly inserted your cock into her drenched pussy.

Guess she won’t have a clean skirt to go home with.

Spooning - Taeyeon

*This one is a little long

After watching Aladdin at the cinema, you headed home alone.

Windy, starry night, with roads empty due to the cold weather. You enjoyed this lonely feeling, it was what you’re used to after all. It brought peace to your mind, away from the loneliness in your shack, away from the judging eyes of society.

All was good until a shady looking fella approached from the opposite direction. He was carrying a big gunny bag behind him, panting. It must’ve been heavy.

At first glance, you would’ve assumed him to be a murderer, carrying a fresh corpse behind him.

He approaches you and tells you hastily “Do you want a body pillow? It has a really beautiful lady on it.”

Totally weirded out. “No thanks, I have no use for it.”

“Just take it, bye.” He dumped the bag onto you, the weight of the bag bringing you down to the ground. He’s nowhere to be seen after you stood back up, disappeared into the wind.

Not wanting to be fined for random disposal of garbage, you carried the gunny bag home. The road home was an ascend, filled with potholes and untamed bushes, fitting for the blighted part of town you live in. Those combined with your fat figure made you pant the whole way home.

You carried the gunny bag home and opened the thing inside. Well at least he wasn’t lying when he said it had a beautiful lady on it at least.

Beauty is relative, but the woman on the pillow was undoubtedly a good view for the eye, especially when compared to your face which only your mum could love.

The day was a long one for you. You were prepared to go to bed by then. Instead of throwing it away, you just hugged the body pillow and went to sleep.

Sleeping naked, you wanted to rub the magic lamp before sleeping, but ultimately decided against it. Whilst falling asleep, you subconsciously rubbed the body pillow a few times, its material comfy enough to not become trash.

Suddenly a weird smoke came out from the body pillow followed by a bright glow of light.

You were temporarily blinded but when you regained vision you saw a fine lady in front of you.

“Hi, my name is Taeyeon. I’m genie for you boy. Tell me your wish”

“Damn, I must’ve been way too absorbed in the movie to be dreaming like this.” You thought.

“You’re not dreaming sir, I will fulfill 3 wishes of yours”

Remembering how your life had been a family friendly film without any adult action scenes, more Spongebob than Fifty Shades of Grey, you’re not going to miss the dance to rectify that.

“Well you do look quite hot, it won’t hurt to have a wet dream. I wish to fuck you while hugging you.”

“Your wish is granted, Sir”

Taeyeon slowly removed her clothes, her perky breasts bouncing out of her bra, her removal of panties unveiled her cleanly shaven pussy, all illuminated by moonlight shining on her fair skin.

She snuck into your embrace, which wasn’t the most comfortable position due to your bloated size, but it still worked. Grabbing your adorably sized cock, she impaled herself onto your cock and started moving.

Your sexual awakening felt incredible, Taeyeon’s pussy was tightly squeezing your cock. You couldn’t go very deep, and you felt sad about it.

“I wish for you to praise me.”

“Your wish is granted, Sir”

Taeyeon’s moans went from soft squeaks to loud groans, her movement increasing in pace.

“Yes Sir, you fill me up so good.” Even though you knew she was just fulfilling your wish, you couldn’t help but feel proud of yourself for the first time in your life.

With the encouragement boost, you began to thrust your dormant hips into her, in unison with her thrusting down.

“Sir, why are you growing bigger. Ahhh”

You’re growing bigger, that’s good to know. Your banging grows in strength to the point of moving the bed with you.

Your neighbours would look down on you even more but you didn’t care. For the first time in forever, you’re doing something you like and you won’t let others disturb you.

“Hghhhh, I’m cumming Sir.”

“Me too. AHhhh, let’s cum together.”

Together, something you weren’t particularly familiar with. The orgasm was great, the sex was great, but even better was doing it with someone who enjoyed and appreciated you.

“One more round?”

“Sorry but I’m too tired sir, you fucked me too good.”

“Thanks for saying that but you don’t need to flatter me.”

“No I mean it sir, you’re the best one I’ve had.”

Warmth filled your insides, not only did your first sex didn’t go down the drain, she even praised you for being good. Your vision was becoming blurry, but you’re sure it was sweat flowing from your forehead.

“Alright then, good night Taeyeon.”

“Good night Sir”

As you awaken the next morning, Taeyeon’s morning visuals stunned you. You haven’t had the chance to properly see how she looked but now that you did, she was gorgeous.

At the same time, Taeyeon also woke up from her sleep.

“Last night was incredible Sir. You were so good.” Her compliment made you replay the scene from yesterday. It had been a long time since anyone had said you’re good at anything.

“That reminds me, you have one more wish Sir, please make the most out of it.”

“What will happen to you once I make my last wish? Will you just disappear? Will last night just be another sweet memory that I’ll forever replay in my mind?” Tears were beginning to form as you’re about to go back to the lonely dark self after experiencing how good things could’ve been.

“Unfortunately. Yes Sir.”

An idea suddenly struck you, “What if I wish for you to stay with me forever?”

“Your wish will always be fulfilled Sir.”

“I wish for you to stay with me forever.”

“Your wish is granted, Sir”

With that, another burst of light blinded you and you’re left alone in your room again, back to square one. Why did you think that you could escape this lonely life destined for you?

One day as you’re going back home from another movie, you saw someone carrying a gunny bag.

The scene felt awfully familiar. You approached the person and realised it was a girl this time around.

“Hi, my name is Taeyeon. I’m from the Girls Generation Genie Team. We work to grant the wishes of all lonely kids in the area. Could you help me with this bag of supplies?”

“Yes! Yes!”

Maybe being a lonely kid wasn’t so bad afterall.

A/N: Thanks for reading. Hope you’ve enjoyed it. Feel free to tell me anything wrong or where I still need to improve.

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plantsarefun06 · 4 years ago

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The Particular Abilities of Marinette, and Her Discovery of Them Chapter 1: How Marinette Became Alone in the World

MasterPost

Marinette al Ghul was not a wanted child, that was no secret to anyone including herself. She felt the scorn of her Grandfather, and the disapproval of her Mother constantly. But she never thought they would do this. Never thought they would go this far.

Marinette al Ghul is not an al Ghul anymore, and now has to navigate the world with her newfound blindness alone. Well… with the help of a little something she wasn’t expecting.

---

Marinette

mar-in-ette /mar-uh-net/ name-meaning failure, nuisance, waster-of-space, insurance

Or at least that is what her name meant to most. Most being her mother and grandfather.

Her life, or rather sex, was not exactly what either of them wanted. They wanted an heir, with strong blood…

...they wanted a male…

Marinette knew that something was inherently wrong with her. Something that despite her greatest efforts she could not control. But it was a bit sad in a way, how at three years old Marinette was scorned upon by nearly everyone she knew.

Despite this, at three years old Marinette knew many things. She knew the theory behind moth martial arts (very little physical practice, most physical training started at the age of five), she knew that the best way to get information was to keep quiet and spy on the maids (most everyone completely ignored the existence of the handmaids. To the higher ups of the League, they were not even acknowledged above an order, they were often forgotten. Because of this many spoke things in front of handmaidens and servants that would be better kept secret. (it didn’t help that the servants loved to gossip)), and what she knew, better than anyone, was that she was worthless. Or at least worthless to Ra’s.

Despite being his blood, and of the blood of some man he had hoped to be his heir, she was not treated as such. The man who fathered her was apparently a powerful man her grandfather thought highly of, and upon declining such an offer to be his heir, decided that he would have his child. Talia getting pregnant with his child for an heir would be the best option in his eyes.

And it was surprisingly easy. Within three months Talia had announced her pregnancy to Ra’s and the high-ranking generals of the League. Ra’s had never been more pleased.

His plan was going perfectly.

They had gone through all the traditional and ceremonial procedures that had been followed by any women who were pregnant and a part of the League. One of which being, a natural birth, and a blind pregnancy. Blind pregnancy meaning not using any form of technology to observe the baby before the due date.

When Marinette learned that her mother’s pregnancy was blind, she knew that this was the only reason she even existed. And she thanked every single weird old person, and their strange traditions and ceremonies that it was this way.

She saw the way Ra’s looked at her. Lips always curled down, and eyebrows always furrowed in disgust. And he wasn’t subtle with his thoughts of Marinette either. He regularly berated her-publicly-on any and all mistakes she made. Everything from doing a stance incorrectly too not getting sufficient-perfect-marks on her arithmetic tests. She felt the scorn of his voice as he would yell at her for disrespecting him when she looked in his eyes when. Or look at the ground while speaking to him. Or not arrive at certain places on time due to her tutors holding her longer than designated. Or ignoring her tutors and leaving when the official period ends.

She couldn’t do anything right. She physically could not do anything right.

It was constant. It was unforgiving.

She knew that had her mother’s pregnancy not been blind. Had they done an ultrasound and seen her gender.

Ra’s would have ordered an abortion on the spot.

She also knew that Grandfather was very tempted to kill her, regardless of her status as: living, breathing, actively conscious human being.

In addition to the old people and all their weird traditions, Marinette also thanked all of her Grandfather’s associates. While they were labelled ‘Supervillains’ (and rightfully so) they did frown upon killing one’s own blood, and Ra’s couldn’t simply kill her and because some were present at her birth and were aware of her existence.

She, again, thanked every weird old person and their strange transitions that insured she lived past the right old age of one day.

So, Marinette simply existed for one purpose.

Insurance.

She didn’t know who her father was. That was a strictly kept secret that only a few of the higher-up general and close allies knew.

She certainly didn’t. Because what child needs to know who their father was.

In all honesty she really didn’t think about who her father was too often. Only when her Grandfather would curse her existence because ‘You were given great opportunity. Your blood of two powerful lines, and you still fail at the simplest of tasks.’ (She dropped the five-pound katana they placed in her hand. She was two.)

So, she would wonder who this ‘second bloodline’ was. She kind of got the idea her father was probably Caucasian. She had a lot of features that resembled that of a Caucasian child. Then again, her father could be of mixed race considering that mother was Chinese-Arab, and she had many leaning Chinese features and very few Arab at all. So maybe, like mother, he was mixed race and she just ended up getting nearly exclusive Caucasian features.

And apparently whoever was her father didn’t stay with the League because he didn’t like her Grandfather (good judgement. Marinette didn’t really like her Grandfather either. He was mean.), but apparently, Grandfather and Mother’s ‘all else has failed’ plan was for them to use her to manipulate her father.

So yes. Insurance. A pawn in her Mother and Grandfather’s game of chess.

So, Marinette just spent her life as any of the League’s high-ranking member’s children would. Constant training, and education. From five in the morning to nine at night it was an incredibly detailed schedule. One that she abided by every day. No breaks.

Attended basic survival theory and espionage classes, her foreign language lessons (those were her favorite), her basic acrobatics classes (her second favorite classes. She liked to do cartwheels), her academics, and her basic martials arts classes.

The martial arts classes were mostly just stances and ‘the theory behind it all’ and maybe a few punches. The league had a running theme of rather than teaching a person a particular thing- whether it be math, acrobatics, or martial arts- a person would be taught the theory of it and have them understand what it was, then they would build on to that. Effective in teaching those who did understand, and those who didn’t ended up in the fire that burnt all the bodies at the end of the month. It was Marinette’s least favorite day because she was forced to watch it and it always stunk really bad.

She never complained though. Her mother would always stand there too. She didn’t see her mother often. (She didn’t really think her mother liked her.) And her mother would stand stock straight with her hands folded together in front of her, staring at the fire (Marinette didn’t even think her mother blinked! Even when the fire would flash really close and make her face go hot. Mother wouldn’t even flinch. She was kind of scary.)

And so, when her mother would stand stock straight, eyes unmoving on the flames, Marinette would too. She would stand there, stock still, even when the fire would flash up really close to her and burn her face, she would tense up and make herself stand really still.

Just like Mother.

---

Marinette was really happy. Practically bouncing as she walked to the south wing of Nanda Parbat for her mathematics class.

She had just finished with her foreign language professor and had been able to read a Mandarin book aloud in English with perfect accuracy without stuttering once. Once!

Marinette was really proud of herself. After finishing English, the professor said they would move on to French! French! She loved the way French would pronunciate their vowels. How they would roll their tongue whe-

She was immediately snapped out of her thoughts when two large arms wrapped around herself and secured her arms down by her sides. Before she could kick the person, or swivel around to see who grabbed her, or scream, she felt it.

Heat.

Across her eyes, her face.

Hot.

And then she felt it. The most agonizing pain she had ever experienced. Her face felt like it was melting. This wasn’t like the fire. Where it would burst out in little bouts and lick her face. It felt as if someone was taking her face and forcing it in the fire.

And now she screamed.

The weight holding her arms down disappeared and she immediately raised her hands to her face to claw at her eyes where she had felt the heat, and the pain. Her mind was screaming at her a multitude of things. She couldn’t decipher any of them past the pain.

She couldn’t think of anything past the pain.

Her screaming continued and the involuntary clawing never ceased. Even when she felt a hand on her back, and more grabbing at her wrists. Had she been in the right state of mind, she would have realized that the hands were small and frail. She would have been able to figure out that these were most likely handmaidens, or some sort of servant, and not attempted to kick them away from her while she continued to paw at herself.

She felt two arms wrap around her again and force her arms down. She only fought harder. Only kicked more violently, only screeched louder, only clawed more viciously. And in doing so, she completely missed the small pinch in her thigh. Only registered her muscles slowly getting heavier, and the slow progression of it getting harder to fight, and her voice becoming more and more sluggish by the moment.

All until eventually her thoughts slowed, and eventually ceased, and she fell unconscious.

---

The first thing Marinette would perceive was the weight across her chest, holding her down to whatever she was on. The weight was soft. A blanket. The thing she was on was comfortable. A bed.

She was tucked in very tight, and the blanket was secure along her collarbones and chest making it near impossible to wiggle out of, and the only achievable movement being her neck so she could look around the room.

And when she went to do just that. When she went to open her eyes, she… couldn’t? She tried to but she still couldn’t see. So, she tried to open them again. And she… she did? Because she was pretty sure she just blinked, but she still couldn’t see anything.

She kept blinking and blinking and blinking, until Marinette managed to pull one of her arms out from under the covers to touch her face.

Wrinkles.

Like old people.

But Marinette wasn’t old, she was three.

Only old people had wrinkles. Some of her Grandfather’s generals, and some of Mother’s handmaidens had wrinkles, but they were all old. Like fifty.

So really old.

But Marinette still felt the creases and folds around her eyes.

...around the eyes that weren’t working.

Because they were open! She was touching the lid. She was feeling herself blink.

They were open!

She kept blinking and blinking until she could feel with her finger tears running down her face and gathering in the wrinkles.

Wrinkles!

Why were there wrinkles!

Why weren’t her eyes working!

Where was she!

What was the heat!

What was that heat!

She wanted to cry. She kept blinking. A few stray tears. But she really wanted to cry.

She had never cried before, well she supposed at some point she did. A baby’s instinct was to cry, and at some point, everyone was a baby, but she knew that if a baby cried in the League, they were left alone. They would have to learn quickly that if they cried, they would only be ignored. It was the first level of training in the League.

But never in her life had the urge to cry been so intense.

That’s when Marinette let out a shrill scream similar to the one, she let out when she felt the heat, an unknown amount of time ago. And had more and more tears fall as she screamed and started to paw at her eyes again.

---

If you want to know something, you listen to the handmaidens. She knew this. That’s why when the handmaidens came into the room, after Marinette's four-and-a-half-hour breakdown, she pretended to be asleep.

They picked up all the things she had thrown around the room.

Marinette had tried to feel around and find the door after what she could guess was an hour of screaming and crying on her bed, which just turned into screaming and crying while knocking stuff over trying to find the door. And screaming and crying when finding there was no way she could open the door and screaming and crying as she gave up and got back on her bed.

And at some point, the screaming and crying ceased entirely, not a single sniffle not a single sob, and she simply laid in her bed. Eyes closed, just laid there completely limp.

She wasn’t surprised the servants thought her asleep. She didn’t think she would be able to get up if she tried. Didn’t think she would be able to speak. Didn’t think she would be able to even blink.

Her heart rate was slow, and the rising and falling of her chest reflected that, her muscles completely relaxed, and her mind… she didn’t really know where her mind was. It was in this weird limbo of complete dissociation and complete awareness of her surroundings.

It proved to be useful because with the handmaidens believing her asleep, they felt free to gossip. And a handmaiden’s gossip was the gateway to all the secrets of Nanda Parbat.

And that it was.

The more she heard, the more she felt like crying again. Like screaming again. Though she couldn’t. Her eyes stung too much to cry. Her throat throbbed too much to scream. Their words swimming around in her mind, not really piecing together.

Acid attack.

Ordered by the Head of Demon.

An heir had been conceived.

Confirmed male.

Mother had managed to seduce the same man that fathered her again. And to avoid another ‘incident’ they forgoed a blind pregnancy and all the traditions that were performed during her gestation and discovered the baby's gender as soon as it was possible.

Apparently, the baby was in an incubator in an unknown, secure location. (Marinette was confused when she heard that. Weren’t incubators for eggs?)

And with the male child, he was obviously the heir.

But the thing was… he wasn’t.

The only difference between Marinette and the boy was their gender, and many other organizations, like the League of Shadows, had forgone the tradition of male heirs being placed before their female counterparts. Meaning that in the eyes of many of Grandfather’s allies, she had a larger claim to the title of ‘Head of Demon’ than the boy.

Ra’s did not like that. So, Ra’s chose the obvious solution to the predicament…

… he blinded the first born so that they would be seen as ‘unfit’ for the title.

So now Marinette laid still on the bed, as the handmaidens walked around her, cleaning the room and continuing their gossip, a lone tear… the first tear… went down Marinette's face, running over the freshly scarred skin, and falling onto the sheets below.

---

She didn’t know how long she sat in that room. It did not take long to realize she was in one of the quarantine rooms of the medical wings of Nanda Parbat.

It became really evident when she heard footsteps getting closer to her and the people who the footsteps belonged to started prodding at her face, listing off her features:

-the area around the eye is scarred, scars will likely be permanent without immediate intervention

-iris and pupil have lost color, and have remained a ‘cloudy white’ since first procedure

-eye is unresponsive to light stimulation

-irreparable damage to cornea

-optic nerve is seared

Marinette had only started her anatomy classes a couple weeks ago. She didn’t know the words ‘cornea’ or ‘iris’ or ‘optic’ but she did understand the words ‘pupil’ and ‘nerve’, so it took a skip and a hop to come to the conclusion that the other words probably were other parts of her eyes, and she knew that nerve where the parts of her body that had to do with feeling and sensing things.

She also understood what the phrase ‘irreparable damage’ meant.

Her eyes were broken forever, and she couldn’t fix them.

---

The only thing that Marinette knew was that there were the two hands on her shoulders, guiding her through the compound.

They kind of hurt, their fingers were digging into her shoulder blades and the pain was awful, but she wasn’t going to say anything. Even if they would move their hands-which they wouldn’t-their hands on her shoulders were the only thing she knew. The only thing that was grounding her.

She knew most of the compound, but the medical wing was not one of those things. Most of the time if she did get hurt during a training exercise or lesson, she would have to deal with it on her own. The only time she remembered going to the medical wing was when she walked over hot coals and her feet needed to be wrapped for a whole week.

And besides that incident, she had never been in the medical wing before. She didn’t know all the entrances or exits, and unlike the rest of the base, she didn’t know any of the secret passageways that laid in the walls.

She had no idea how to navigate through the wing, and when people started to guide her around, she didn’t know where they were taking her.

I wasn’t until she was stopped and heard the distinct sound of something heavy swinging did, she knew where she was.

She was in her Grandfather’s ‘throne room’.

She didn’t think it would be possible for her to not recognize the sound of the heavy iron doors opening. She absolutely loathed it. Being in this room meant that she was in the presence of her Grandfather. Being in the presence of her Grandfather meant she would get a reminder that ‘she was unworthy of the blood running through her veins’.

And the ‘reminder’ basically just meant that she had to take his scolding while looking down at the ground, because god forbid, she looks in his eyes. (Last time she looked him in the eyes he ordered the guards to take her to the mean doctor. She really didn’t like the mean doctor.)

She felt the hands leave her shoulders and heard the thud of their knees hitting the ground in a bow before Marinette followed suit.

If this time being in the throne room was like her previous times there would be guards lining the wall behind Grandfather, while Mother stood slightly to the right, staring straight ahead devoid of emotion.

And Grandfather would stand front and center, glaring down at her while he condemned her for whatever she did wrong. It was really easy to do things wrong. She often ended up right here, kneeling before him while he berated her, at least once a week.

Despite her eyes not working so she couldn’t see his glare, she could feel it.

She could hear his cape do the little shwoopy thing indicating it was time for him to tell her exactly why she was here. (She was pretty sure it was because her eyes were now broken, but she never really knew with Grandfather.)

His voice boomed across the room and made herself, and everyone else in the room want to shudder, “You have proved yourself time and time again to be unequal to your peers.”

That was true. She knew she was constantly outmatching them, but Grandfather meant that she was doing worse than them. She didn’t know how, but Grandfather always said that she was lacking.

“You have constantly made a mockery of the blood that has flown in your veins.”

She knew that ‘mockery’ meant ‘to misrepresent or imitate something in an absurd manner’, (When she woke up from a nightmare, she would read a part of the dictionary to help calm herself down. It worked really well.) but Marinette wasn’t making fun of being an al Ghul? Grandfather didn’t make sense sometimes.

“And now you have proven your unworthiness by becoming disfigured.”

But Grandfather ordered it? Isn’t that what he wanted?

“And because of that…”

And she could hear the finality in his tone. The kind he used when he decided that going to the mean doctor would be a just punishment. She hated going to him, everything hurt when she was with the mean doctor. Marinette simply started to prepare herself mentally for however long she was ordered to stay with him.

She was hoping it was less than a day. Last time she messed up on her World History exam, and got a subpar score, she stayed with him for a full 24 hours.

It was the longest twenty-four hours of her life.

“...you are hereby expelled from the League of Shadows, and are to be banished from its ranks, and are stripped of your title as an ‘al Ghul’.”

Marinette, despite knowing what happened last time, rose her head in shock. She was processing what he said, and not at all understanding what was happening.

Expelled.

Banished.

Stripped.

She wasn’t understanding why there were suddenly hands on her shoulders. Why those hands were digging into her skin even harder than before.

Those hands were no longer grounding.

Expelled.

Banished.

Stripped.

She didn’t understand why they were dragging her back towards the door.

Expelled.

Banished.

Stripped.

She didn’t understand why they turned left down the corridor rather than right, the way toward the staircases that lead to the mean doctor’s office and the classrooms.

Expelled.

Banished.

Stripp-.

It wasn’t until she felt the cool air of the doors of the courtyard opening that she understood what was happening and started to scream and beg.

“Al Ghuls do not beg! Al Ghuls do not scream!” Her mother’s voice was ringing in her ears of one of her times with the mean doctor. Mother had come down specifically because she could hear her screaming and begging for the doctor to stop.

But right now, those words meant nothing, she was trying anything to get her Grandfather to stop this, to get anyone to stop this.

She tried to dig the heel of her boots into the concrete floors, tried to gain leverage and stop the guards from dragging her away, try and find a way to get away from the men and go back to her room (she wasn’t sure how she would get there; she knew the compound well but not well enough to find her way around without visual aids, but she would find a way).

When she heard the lock mechanism of the gates moving-opening- she stopped fighting.

Maybe it was the snow that was falling on her face, feeling like little pricks against her skin, or maybe it was the crushing realization of what had just happened, or maybe it was both, but she realized then…

...begging would do nothing.

That regardless of her screams and pleads for mercy, she would still be thrown out by her grandfather.

Disowned for something he ordered.

Left to die.

As she laid in the snow outside the gates after being thrown like a rag doll, as the guards who had dragged her out closed them, both guards being on the inside of those gates, leaving her on the other side.

She realized one thing…

… for the first time ever…

… she was truly alone.

[Next]

---

Notes: Updates posted every Wednesday.

Cross posted on AO3.

#maribat #bio dad bruce wayne #blind marinette #bio mom talia #marinette al ghul #league of assassins #ml x dc #mlb x dc #the particular abilities of marinette and her discovery of them #the blindness of marinette

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tokyotokoyami · 4 years ago

Text

MHA Character Reaction: Getting You Pregnant

Aizawa, Bakugo, Hawks, Kaminari, Kirishima, Midoriya, Todoroki, + Tokoyami

Genre: Fluff, Suggestive

Warnings: 18+, unplanned pregnancy, brief mentions of abortion, profanity and obscene language

A/N: not really anatomy neutral but doesn’t use pronouns so still gender neutral

“we’re having a kid?”

notice how he says ‘we’

heart melting

pretends to be upset but really isn’t

“great now i have another rugrat to take care of”

kind of stoked to have a mini him running around

really wants a boy just because he really does want to see a tiny version of himself

if he had a girl he wouldn’t be mad though

would spoil his little princess

the type of guy to buy cheesy matching outfits for the kid

tries to help out in his own special way

“go sit down. i can do it myself dumbass.”

cooks for you a lot more

just wants to take care of you and your little prince/ss

if you ever complain about being pregnant, don’t

he’s going to complain right back

“the hell are you complaining for, you’re the one that wanted me to knock you up.”

he’s going to try even harder to be the #1 hero

that dumbass tsundere wants nothing more than to be the best for you and your baby

so excited

“i’m gonna be a dad? i’m gonna be a dad!”

you’ve never seen his face light up that bright

smothers you in kisses, picks you up and spins you in circles

immediately becomes what i like to call a helicopter husband (even if you’re not married)

“sorry was that too tight? did i hurt you?”

he’s gonna nag you ALL. THE. TIME.

“hey babe, are you eating enough? are you getting lots of fluids?”

“you’re not drinking coffee are you? don’t it’s not good for the baby.”

“don’t stand for too long or you’ll-“

ALL. THE. TIME.

if you’re thinking about doing anything just don’t

if you’re a pro hero he will demand you take off work for the next nine months

of course he didn’t want you getting hurt before but now he really doesn’t want you hurt

he wouldn’t necessarily want you to stop working completely but he’ll suggest you stay in the office

he’d never force you to stay behind though,, he doesn’t think it’s manly to force anything on you

but he cares a lot and wants you as safe as possible

buys baby shoes for the hell of it

“they were cute! just like our little angel inside of you.”

his brain is blank

nothing you’re saying is going through to him

“YOU’RE TELLING ME YOU’RE PREGNANT?! HOW?!”

needs time to process

when his brain finally stops short circuiting he’s going to panic

“i’m not ready yet! what are we going to do?”

he’ll come around after like a day or so

and when he does oh boy are you in for a treat

super proud

brags about it non-stop

“hey did you hear? y/n is pregnant with my baby. we’re starting a family.”

“yea denki we know you’ve told us twenty times already”

super excited even though he has no idea what he doing

thinks pregnancy is hot

starts calling you mama

“hey mama, lookin’ good”

in the end he’s excited to be a dad even if he has no idea what he’s doing

"cool”

isn’t worried at all really which is weird considering he hasn’t thought about having kids

doesn’t even consider getting rid of it

the type of guy to take parenting classes because he wants everything to be perfect

comes home one day with tons of bags

“i bought this for the baby”

he’s got clothes, shoes, toy, stuff for a nursery, EVERYTHING

he’s got stuff for you too

he’s spoiling you more than before

gives you some of the those good old icyhot massages to make you feel better

holds your hair back when you get morning sickness

goes out of his way to satisfy your pregnant cravings no matter how disgusting or bizzare they may be

makes sure you have a good doctor which a lot of people tend to really overlook

the perfect partner really

now why the hell would you tell him this

he’s going to freak the fuck out

his head is going a thousand miles a minute

does that little deku mumble thing

will ask all might what to do

does his research

wants to learn everything about pregnancy

and when he does

he’s mortified

thinks of all the pain you’re going to be in nine months from now

tries to make up for it by babying you

waits on you hand and foot

you could breathe in a certain direction and he’s in butler mode

“what is it? your breath changed. do you need something. i can get it for you. just tell me what it is i got it.”

“well this is unexpected.”

immediately assumes you don’t want this

“your body your choice.”

isn’t going to tell you he wants to keep it

he doesn’t want to influence your decision

he doesn’t want you to feel like he thinks you’re a incubator or something when that certainly isn’t the case

if you tell him you’re keeping it he’ll be so relieved

he’s thanking all the gods at once

if you’re not married already he’s going to propose

isn’t super traditional but he thinks you might as well seal the deal if you’re just going to start a family regardless

he had decided a while ago that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you

his plans just got a little sped up

but he’s happy

his dream come true

“are you serious right now? if you’re joking i won’t forgive you.”

since he had his childhood stripped away from him he’s wanted nothing more than to have a kid of his own to show the world how it’s done

i think he’s another one that wants a daughter but i also see him wanting a son

and for that reason i think he’d want the gender to be a surprise

he doesn’t want to know until that thing comes out of you

he buys a tiny version of his hero costume for the kid to wear

he would expect the kid to have his quirk

so he mentally prepares for that

and brags about it

“they’ll be flying around the city in no time, isn’t that right kiddo?”

did i mention he talks to your stomach constantly

gets off on the fact that he’s the one that got you pregnant

constantly tells you how much he loves your pregnant body

lets you know that fun time does not stop just because you’re pregnant if you know what i mean

very calm

why should he panic anyways

he already has a kid,, what’s so bad about having another

he cares more about how you feel

“are you willing to go through all the pains of being pregnant?”

tells eri she’s getting a sister

and yes he says sister

does not hide his desire for a daughter

just another princess for him to spoil

he does consider the possibility of eri feeling differently about him now that he has a biological kid otw

so he’ll go out of his way to show her that he still loves her the same

will buy cat themed items for the child

goes to the doctor with you and holds your hand the whole time

honestly he gets super protective of you,, way more protective than before

someone on the street could look at you the wrong way and he’d think about suspending them from a lamp post in his scarf cocoon

also quite a bit more touchy

whether it be in public, at home in the kitchen, on the couch, or laying in bed with you in his arms

hes always got a least one of his arms wrapped around you because he wants to feel closer to the little monster inside of you

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quirklessidiot · 4 years ago

Text

Title: filthy rich [3/3] Pairing: millionaire!sakusa kiyoomi x y/n [filthy capitalist au] Genre: mystery, major angst ahead, thriller, mafia!au-ish

Synopsis: Just run, Y/N. Don’t look back.

Warnings: dark and yandere themes, toxic relationships, mentions of violence, shady business, class differences, mentions of rape, smoll breeding kink, unwanted pregnancy, mentions of abortion, and sakusa being a manipulative bastard

Notes:

Im disappering again for a week or two so as a parting gift, here ya go, im starting a bokuto fanfic soon and posting the reboot of notice me soon too hnnng thanks for the wait guys uwu

A sorta realistic take on a yandere is harder than it looks kssjdn omg anyways here yall go the long awaited last chapter of filthy rich. I’m not sure if I should put like a one shot sequel but so far im marking this series completed. Thanks for sticking by!

previous || series masterlist || blood son [sequel;one shot]

You run your hands through your hair and shut your eyes tight, the quietness and stillness of your shared apartment was something to bask on before you put on a fake mask of happiness. It had been exactly two months since you found out about the birth control switch and the medaide agenda.

In the span of those two months, you had grown more observant towards your boyfriend’s actions and you knew that it wouldn’t be anytime soon until he actually notices that you were onto him.

You let out a shaky breath as you recollected some weird things you’ve seem to have noticed, how his brows would furrow when he’d receive a call indicating that something was up and it was serious or how you visited your ex-boss one time a week or so ago along with Kenjiro since you wanted to see how he was doing.

“...Well, he just didn’t come home and sold the place. Apparently he was in a rush to move or something because of family matters so I didn’t exactly see him.” the neighbor gossiped to you two.

“Y/N?”

You jump on your spot as you hear that dreadfully familiar voice.

“Hey,” You greet, walking up to him, you decide to do your usual hug but stop when you notice a small red stain on his necktie, the tie is dark blue and although it wasn’t obvious from afar, it definitely was up close. Your brows are furrowed together, this time in pure curiosity, “Did you get hurt? It’s unlike you to get messy.”

You notice the quick shift of attitude in his eyes, you were seemingly getting good at observing his emotions these days and it looked like he panicked for a second there.

Odd.

“A friend of mine had gotten hurt a while ago, you remember Atsumu Miya?”

A vivid image of a blonde man crossed your mind, he was another conglomerate friend of your boyfriend, another person to be weary of to add to the list, “Oh, is he alright?” you asked, trying to keep it casual as you untie his tie for him as usual.

“Yes. He’s awfully clumsy. You don’t need to worry.”

“Oh…” You mumbled, “by the way, I visited my ex-chief.”

“Ex-chief?”

“Mhm.” you hummed, “You know, my boss from before? Me and a few co-workers decided to visit him since he was a really good boss. Turns out he just left without telling anyone, poor man.”

“Sounds unpleasant. Did you know why he quit?”

“No.” You shrugged as you take the tie out and place it on the side, “He suddenly just quit his job and moved, neighbors said it was also because of family matters. It’s kinda weird because as far as we knew, he didn’t have a family.”

“Would you like me to look into it?”

You almost stiffen when he slithers his arms on your waist but you didn’t want to give away any suspicion, “No. I don’t want to pry. Hopefully he’s enjoying his retirement.” You sighed, turning towards him with a tight smile, “Now what would you like for dinner? I was thinking Mediterranean? I need to lose some weight since I’ve been feeling bloated for a while.”

He leans in for a soft kiss on your temple, “Mediterranean would be fine. Would you like anything else? We could order more.” he hummed, his lips slowly started to dangerously hover on top of yours.

“No, it’s fine.” You give him a quick peck and wiggle your way out of his arms, your stomach doesn’t feel well these days. Whenever you were near Sakusa you had the urge to throw up your innards despite having an empty stomach.

You don’t notice the dangerous gaze on your behind as you pick up the phone for your take-out.

Sakusa hasn’t felt you in a long time and it’s driving him insane, he wants to feel your heat, your body, and everything in between. He wants to fill you up and see you pregnant with his children. He wants everyone in the world to know you were his and his only.

Yet he can’t do that.

You’ve ignored his affections these past few weeks and it had been driving him insane to the point where he had to ask one of his men to put an eye on you to see if you had been cheating on him or seeing someone else.

Yet you hadn’t.

Your routine was the same old one and Sakusa is digging his nails deeply into his skin in his office one day with his tie uncharacteristically untied. Miya Atsumu sits across him, taking a sip from his flask, “Ya look like shit.” the blonde points out.

“Fuck off, Miya.”

“Heard from your cousin that you’re not getting laid by your girl these days.”

“You better be thankful that you’ve got men behind you or I’d be shooting your fucking brains out for saying that.” Sakusa spats, his dark gaze pointedly looking at the blonde across him.

“You should just find someone else then and not yer prude of a-”

“Keep telling me ideas like that and maybe I might just shoot you and chop your body up until it looks fuckin’ unrecognizable.”

Atsumu raises his hands up, signaling that he was giving up, “Gee, omi-omi. I was just giving my advise. It’s so easy to drop her.”

“I don’t want to drop what’s mine.”

“You’ve got issues.” He chuckles, “Haven’t you been switching out her pills and fucking her raw for the last couple of months? I bet yer ass you got her pregnant on that before but ya just don’t know it. Getting her pregnant would definitely secure her spot in her life. Woman’s nuthin’ without ya.”

“She’s...she’s not showing…”

“When was the last time ya two went at it?”

“Two months ago.”

“Ya poor boy.” Atsumu sighs, shaking his head, “Ya sure you don’t want to take a break from being a loyal boyfriend for one night? i bet Y/N wouldn’t notice.”

“And no one would notice if you fucking disappeared. I’ll make sure of it, now get out.”

You may not have been the sharpest tool on the shed but you know that someone’s been tailing you these past few days, you’re not stupid. You could only come to the conclusion that it was Sakusa who was doing such things but you couldn’t get why.

Something just didn’t make sense. It felt like you were missing an important piece in the puzzle, med-aide and the switch of your pills and now a hidden tail?

You furrow your brows together in deep thought as you sat down next to a teenage boy on his phone, you decided to take the bus today to the grocery store, surprisingly the one tailing you wasn’t around today.

Your eyes slowly shift towards the boy’s phone, it seemed like he was playing a video game.

An otome game, to be exact.

You felt your lips twitch up, you remembered those games a lot growing up. The graphics seem to have massively improved now by the looks of it, “...That looks interesting.” You tell the teenage boy who turns to you in surprise.

“Oh, thanks.” the blonde replied quietly.

“Is that a new otome game?”

“Kind of.” He blinks, his gaze returning back to the screen, “It’s sort of a remake of the yandere simulator from back then.”

You feel your shoulders tense up.

“A yandere?”

“Yeah.” The blonde nods, “The girl’s awfully creepy in the game, she stalks him, does things to get him. The player has to catch her in the act and evade her at the same time.”

“Oh…” You blink, “I-uh, this is weird… but what’s a yandere again?’

“It’s someone obsessively in love with you. They’ll do anything to have you stay by them.” He says, pushing on a button but suddenly the screen turns red and you feel shivers run down your spine as you hear him curse and the words ‘you’re caught’ appear on the screen.

“W-what happened to your character?”

“He died. Nothing much.” he mumbles, “If the Yandere knows they can’t have you, they’ll kill you.”

You immediately went pale as soon as you heard that. Maybe, just maybe you were being paranoid. He wouldn’t go to that extent, would he?

“How did your character escape the yandere in the game?”

“Well, I haven’t finished the game yet but based on some anime’s and manga’s I've usually read. They either killed to get away or they moved so far away where they wouldn’t be seen so I think the creator might have the same ending.” The blonde said, he slowly looked to your side, “You’re looking awfully pale, ma’am. Are you alright?”

“Yeah, j-just remembered a horrible game I played back when I was your age.” You gulped in, “Nightmares, you know? The yandere tried to get my character pregnant and tried to get in her way of moving out of the country.”

“Sounds like a very realistic one.” He mumbles, “What did your character do?”

“I wasn’t able to finish it.” you whispered, loud enough for him to only hear, “I couldn’t really find a way out.”

“The developers of the game must’ve made it hard for you. Maybe your character should’ve ran away,” he advised, “Or better yet, you should’ve killed him.”

“I-well, I don't think there were options like that.”

“Well if I were you and there was no option for killing, I’d run. Far, far away. Change my identity and all that.” he exits the game and stuffs the phone back in his pocket, you get a good look of his cat-like eyes and immediately feel a shiver on your spine with the next words he say, “I mean its a game but you wouldn’t wanna loose and get your character killed, right?”

“R-right.”

The teenage boy hops down without even saying goodbye and you have a scary realization that you can’t break it off like you originally had planned. You needed to run, run far as you can and get lost.

The words that the teenage boy says echoes in your head for the next few days, from that point on, realization dawns upon you that, nothing is certain now. You couldn’t trust anyone, you couldn’t let friends and family be involved in this. Sakusa Kiyoomi is a powerful man so you needed to be careful with how you were going to disappear.

You continue to act nonchalant and the same as you try to lay out your plan but you knew that you had only a week or so to complete this for it to successfully work.

Sakusa Kiyoomi wonders what he should do to save the relationship, he’s tried everything in the book that he could think of but you remained the same. Was this the end of the relationship? For real?

He could never stomach the idea of having you leave him.

It’s eerie that day, something felt different when he came home to an empty apartment. It looked the same yet something felt very, very different. Apparently the apartment guards said you were here since your car hadn’t left the driveway and they hadn’t seen you go out.

He checks out your side of the closet, your clothes remain there untouched and your toiletries were there too. He scans the fridge for your notes but nothing is stuck there. He suddenly feels like something cold was dumped on him.

It couldn’t be, right?

Right?

He runs to every room, checking every nook and cranny and when he finally reaches the last room which was the bathroom, nothing is there.

Everything was in its place except you.

Where were you?

Your bank account remains untouched, your wallet and phone was left in the apartment. It was as if you were returning home, the very least. Komori tells him to calm down, saying that they’re letting the best people find you around the city, they don’t rule out that someone might’ve had the audacity to touch you.

Whoever took you would be given hell to pay, that’s for sure. Was it the triad? Kkangpae’s? Or opposing yakuza’s? Oh, they’ll definitely have their heads on the platter if they tried to harm a single hair on your head.

Sakusa doesn’t even hesitate to notify the police about you already despite the memorandum that twenty-four hours is needed to consider a person missing, it's nothing a little money can fix.

“I hope we find her soon.” Your aunt sighed, “I’ve notified her parents about it. It’s definitely weird that she’d leave all her valuables behind.”

Hinata and Natsu sit there next to their mom, completely sad and worried, “I’ve hired the best people for it already, obaasan. We’ll find Y/N.” Sakusa replies yet his thoughts are in a complete frenzy now.

And find you they did.

No stone was left unturned. He made sure of it. Yet after a month of relentless searching. Nothing came up, it seemed like you had just vanished and Sakusa Kiyoomi had turned the whole underground world upside down for you but nothing came up.

Some say that you disappeared and ran away but that was immediately ruled out, no security cameras saw you in and out during that day and it would be impossible for you to just leave without security cameras on you. The guard had exclaimed that despite the blackout that day, the generators only took a few minutes to power up so they’d definitely catch you on camera in case you ever exited the building (along with the guards since they knew exactly what you looked liked) plus the clothes and such were still there, left untouched.

Some said you died, it was definitely impossible for you to just vanish without a single trace after all since everyone was looking for you.

Yet no one dared to say it in front of the boss, not if they valued their life.

The billionaire had dried out his connections to find you. What good was it to be the most powerful and richest man in the country if he couldn’t find you? Life had no meaning now, you were gone. It felt like a part of him was ceasing to function.

Sakusa Kiyoomi was a dead man walking now.

Unknown to the whole world, you’re in a small town with little to no signal. Your hair is chopped unevenly and your skin is darker from the repeated exposure under the sun, your life is simple and mundane now yet you’re happy.

For the first time in months, you actually felt free.

You shut your eyes tight, the events that transpired this past few months replayed in your head. Your escape was definitely done as carefully as you can and you didn’t even know if you’d succeed since you weren’t a master in that sort of thing.

You recalled that it was a week before you ran away, a few days after you met that kid in the bus. Someone from the electric company had come to inform you that there was a scheduled black out in the city that day during the afternoon and you felt something bubble up in you. That was the day you’d put your plan into motion.

You knew that the longer you delayed your plan, the harder it would be to escape.

You had a few minutes to actually put your plan to work. The camera’s on the hallways would cease to function for a few minutes according to the guard downstairs as he did a protocol on the building (apparently the generators were quick). So that morning after Sakusa left, you placed only a few clothes and the stash of money you had been carefully hiding in a garbage bag and chopped your hair short in an uneven manner. Burning all the remaining hair on the fireplace and the black hair color that you use with it. The maid uniform that you stole on your floor and a fake name plate that you made was on and you were good to go.

The minute the black out started, you took the garbage bag and walked out. Taking the stairway used by the caretakers, you made sure to just look down and never directly up at the camera’s pretending to work.

When you finally made it out of your building. You let out a stiff sigh and put down the bag, it was only the beginning. If you thought the same way as Sakusa Kiyoomi, you could only imagine that you needed to be more careful from this point on.

You take the newly bought duffel bag that you strategically hid behind some boxes. Thankfully when you had placed it yesterday afternoon, it hadn’t been touched.

You put on a pair of shorts and a baggy shirt with cheap shades and stuffed the maid uniform in the duffel bag along with your belongings in the garbage bag. You take the other route that led to the busy streets. It was easy to look like a tourist and seemingly blend in the crowd, from that point on, you only had one destination in mind.

When you were younger, you vividly remember an acquaintance telling you about this small town outside of Tokyo where her grandparents were from. It was only an hour away via plane and when you went down another few hours via bus yet if you took the bus route all in all, it would take a few days.

Since it was far, only a few busses actually went there and since you had to leave within the day, you decided to just take the bus nearest to that town and take another bus when you arrived there.

The plan smooth-sailed from that point on.

Except for one minor detail.

You open your eyes and look down at your now small bump. The monster who almost had you trapped left a parting gift, you grip your garden hoe tightly.

A big part of you wanted to kill it.

Yet every time you try to, you hesitate.

The moment you arrived here, you had to pretend to be a weary and poor widow. You just didn’t expect to be a weary and poor expecting widow. You let out an uncharted sigh at the thought, it was hard enough to be alone here with little to no money.

This child had the demon’s blood in it.

Yes, you may have gone free from his cage but in truth with his seed growing in your stomach day by day, you started to feel quite the opposite.

taglist [thanks for your support ilyasm skkss im so sorry for updating late too :(]

@maraudusk ;; @iamnotobsessed ;; @ssuna ;; @weebartistinc ;; @aomineavenue ;; @tsukkismamagucci ;; @onlyshinji ;; @ichiraku-verse ;; @watevermelon ;; @victoriasee ;; @caramelcandescence ;; @n-nara ;; @bloody-bella ;; @ricefarmerkita ;; @paripedia ;; @srhlsx ;; @craftyfawns ;; @kepchups ;; @soggycardboardd ;; @vinnieluv ;; @dinablossom ;; @yourstruly-01 ;; @shinhiromi ;; @dinablossom ;; @kneecotinee ;; @vicassa ;; @ahoeforshouto ;; @benimarus-main-mop ;; @atsunakaashi ;; @myaaa-xoxoxox ;; @newfriendjen ;; @usedcoupon

@kn0xiousnight

[can’t tag you guys uwu just make sure ur tags are open :<]

#sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa kiyoomi imagines #sakusa kiyoomi headcanons #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #yandere!sakusa #idk its my take on yandere and toxic relationships #haikyuu scenarios #📝📝.Filthy rich series #hostclub.adulting

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