#it gets boring around here sometimes
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me after attempting to get back into sims and realizing i had a lot more to do than play the game
#hi everyone#I’m going around hugging you all#okay now that we are gathered here today#i will simply acknowledge that i have been gone for a very long time and then also acknowledge that maybe it was for the best#i relied on sims to be my only creative activity even if i tried to write a book at the same time#and also. i prioritized sims over real life responsibilities. that’s just a deadly combination lol#but I recently noticed I just replaced sims with Netflix. with YouTube. with anything that gave me quick dopamine#literally became addicted in a sense. still am but I’ve been cut cold turkey from most everything#I get off work and go. okay I’ve done the dishes and the laundry……..I could read or write or bake….#I try to write and sometimes i get a good hour#then I read for a few hours and then get tired of it#and I made cookies Tuesday so I’m waiting for those to be gone before baking again#I’m just so pitiful that I feel BORED and don’t know what to do#so I said….. okay what if I do sims for an hour.#I downloaded some new cc Tuesday and tried to play yesterday#y’all ……………….. I can’t find the energy anymore to set up elaborate scenes and pose my sims and plan posts#I said wow… this is boring without my intervention and fake story#I said wow…….. all this for what? for tumblr? yes I created cool things and provided joy. but is that inherintly important compared to my#own joy? my own everyday activities I should be doing?#y’all I do not leave the house unless we got out to eat or shop or travel to our parents#.. I have little desire to. I’m trying to find that desire#but my husband is busy with grad school and work and I don’t want to do anything by myself#I’ve found myself in one heck of a slump#I didn’t want to be human for awhile. just had no desires no interests no ambitions#I was slacking off SO HARD at work. I just had no drive to do well#I’m still working on it. I’m still trying to get caught up. I’m still trying to force myself to move every day.#but I am struggling y’all. and I can tell you that sims… sims isn’t helping rn but I want it to so bad. I want to get back into it#I didn’t mean to disappear on everyone. I got married and then life got busy and then I fell into this hole of nothing#I didn’t even WANT to crawl my way out. but my husband has helped a lot. I feel like such a child!!!!#I reached max tags. 🙃 bye love you all. till next time
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☠️🥀
#art#I just wanted to see if there was a recording function on my laptop and there is! It looks interesting so I thought I'd share#Imagine the first protomen album playing in the background - It's what I was listening to actually while painting haha#The colors look terrible on mobile... I don't want to deal with that 😭 it's more vibrant on my computer#Anyways the recorder only recorded the main photoshop window.#it’s strange not to see my screen not half covered by references along with the layers/history haha When I stream on discord it does it too#I was getting really annoyed and bored with the rendering process I had grown accustomed too#Lazy sketches and thousands of transparent brushstrokes of layers were getting to me - almost a watercolor technique?#Been messing around a lot and this painting method is quite fun actually - I think that's what is most important - the results be damned#I had stopped touching the liquify and smudge tool for a really long time and I've been using it for this#So yes I've been enjoying myself and to change the current more I've been doing a lot developed sketches too#also....Sometimes I doodle chibi VHD while in class...would anyone actually be interested if I post them on here? ♡(๑´• .̫ •ू`๑)
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…no…
Seishu get out of my notifications
#🩵 ❝ 𝙟𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙤𝙛 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙨 ❞ ; reblogs#🩷 ❝ 𝙢𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙛 𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙚 ❞ ; seishu#sigh…no i don’t :(#when are you staying the night again?#it gets boring around here sometimes#you went hollywood on me and now you never spend the weekend anymore :(
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Tosuke (?) (Jujustu Kaisen)
My evil rein of everything-shibas returns!!!!!! Look I saw a shiba and caved and cried :( Tosuke deserves a spot here.
At first I was like "I love shibas but why is one inexplicably here???" but then the little story just crushed my heart cause its so real. Granted its of any dogs nature to be there for you when no one else is but it just reminded me so much of my Alphonse who was on my feet at the time 🥹 10/10, Tosuke has done no wrong!!!!!!!
#shiba inu#shiba#10/10#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#haha dont talk to me about it im just watching it while i get over my covid#its defintely not horrible??? but i dont...like it either?#this shouldnt be an anime rant blog but i already ran idv thru the dirt once here (rightfully) so#idk if its like translation problems but im left really confused by like the magic system almost constantly#the designs and personalities also keep tending to be a bit samey to me. . . or like just.. everyone is a gimmick?#and its. very. very. very. very expositiony.........#im fine with exposition! im not cinema sins but in jjk just makes me so tired sometimes...takes the cool out of it#i keep wondering if they had shorter time to make their seasons if id enjoy it more#but that seems like a cruel or rude thing to wish on animators#they should be allowed to make their art!!! even if that art is fight scenes that really bore me............#i guess (looks around for my safety) it could be dragonball >:) (is killed)#haha. jonk i havent even watched it in a hundred years. ok that concludes my rant
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So where do I find the people that regularly send anons? I want an anon army 🥺 c’mon pleeeease
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Seeing a parent be dismissive (at best) to their kid and having a freeze response as I rapidly try to calculate how badly it could go for me to step in and call them out on it
#ghost posts#be the change you want to see in the world#like I’m not looking for a fight but also I want to help the kids so badly#like I see all of these strangers or sometimes even people I know and it’s just UGH#like how do I civilly tell a parent your 2 year old doesn’t understand they can’t stick random things in their mouth that you gave them#they don’t get that it’s dirty they’re bored#you shouldn’t yell at them for it and especially not smack them#it doesn’t help that half the time around here there is a language barrier#then there’s my neighbor that’s always swearing at his 10 year old#and the kid just seems to take it#others that complain that their kid is rowdy when I KNOW they haven’t taken them outside to play and run around#listen I was dismissed all the time as a kid I NEVER want to be that kind of person
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how do you gain a hobby you like . /genq
#someone said something to me a while back and it’s been bugging me#not that what they said was bad#but just. huh. Wow.#I don’t really like doing anything do I#I go on social media ->#get bored. play games ->#get bored. draw ->#get bored. -> join a vc#GET BORED?? -> go on social media#rinse and repeat#I don’t really have anything in my house that could be classified as a hobby. like I don’t have clay or whatever the hell lying around#cooking/baking feels like a chore sometimes and I don’t even have the knowledge#yeah I. I’ve just been sitting here. it’s been bugging me a lot#I don’t want to be inside my own head anymore#I’m really sorry if this makes anyone uncomfortable I’m just kinda Whaugh I suppose ?#I want to be entertained
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#here's some of the classics on that list i have beef with btw:#i have tried to read A Confederacy of Dunces several times and it's funny but it's also so cringe and Ignatius is so obnoxious#that i find it too difficult to finish like i just feel depressed and bad for everybody around him too much#i tried reading Infinite Jest like a decade ago and i got like 200 pages in and i remember thinking it felt like#such a slog the entire time because he's just so gd wordy and also i stopped liking DFW after i heard the abuse allegations against him#frankenstein i didnt read that long ago but i just remember finding it so boring for some reason?? i feel i might need to read it again#dracula ngl i feel like im cheating a bit saying ive completely read it because i loved the beginning and then HATED so much of the rest#the characters were just so boring and melodramatic hahaha i just liked the part where jonathan was doing a travel diary#and trapped in the castle tbh and after that i skimmed quite a bit#i almost flipped my shit when i saw ender's game on there because I ALWAYS mix it up with ready player one by ernest cline#which i bought the audiobook of a while back and hated every minute of it i dont think its good at all#but it wasnt that so phew my faith in this list is somewhat restored#i read most of the first game of thrones book and was disappointed tbh maybe because id seen the show already#so i was like 'this feels almost exactly the same except worse?' because i'd been expecting it to give me more depth and insight#into the characters but instead it felt exactly the same and i still didnt love any of the characters enough to feel attached to them#also i am fully aware me not personally liking or vibing with a book doesnt mean it doesnt deserve to be considered great btw#but i think if youre gonna be like me and force yourself to go through a bunch of lists like this very seriously then you also need to just#let yourself be like 'yeah not for me' without feeling too bad about it sometimes too#often times i dont particularly love the classics or 'important books' but at the same time#i still feel like im getting more out of reading them than just grabbing the newest hyped up books that also dont do anything for me#maybe not in a 'wow i loved reading this' way but in like a#'i now have first-hand knowledge of this thing that is so influential / so frequently referenced'#or 'this challenged me and i feel like i did a mental/emotional workout or gave me some new food for thought'#or 'made me more aware of what gaps in my knowledge and reading skills and what my tastes are too'#sort of way...#it really just depends on what you're reading for and why and what you're hoping to get out of it a lot of the time maybe#it's like the homework i give myself to go through these lists that i also intersperse with the stuff i read more just for fun#p
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i do love that vash is the Definition of high int, low wis. he puts on the goofiness to get ppl to not pay attention to how absolutely Bonkers skilled he is so ppl just assume he's a dumbass. and like. he IS. in some ways. he is SUCH a dumbass. but he's an incredibly intelligent dumbass. he has layers.
#speculation nation#focusing on the wiki page's bit that says his IQ is higher than most humans#like YES he's a rabid little guy (big guy tbh) all bark no bite least intimidating motherfucker around (until he Gets Serious)#but he's also like. legit super sharp. like Geeze it takes me by surprise anytime i see it#if any1 thinks he's genuinely stupid. Pls. pls. pay attention. he is VERY smart.#he also is the kind of stupid where he would shoot a hole in a jelly donut#listen you can be highly intelligent and highly stupid at the same time. believe me. that is my entire existence.#me projecting onto vash in yet another way re: high int low wis#im a total dumbass & make all sorts of stupid decisions. many just for the fun of it#like how yesterday i sampled the hazelnut extract. despite knowing FULL WELL that sampling the rose and vanilla extracts#made my tongue numb. guess what happened when i tried the hazelnut extract?#if u guessed that it made my tongue numb. ur right!!! i had to go to the sink to rinse out my mouth just like i did with the rose n vanilla#did i know that was going to happen? yes! did i sample it anyways? YES! this is the kind of chaotic dumbass im talking about here#sometimes life is boring and you gotta do what u gotta do to get ur kicks ok.#vash is an immortal guy living his life trying to be underestimated so he doesnt have to get into fights#but pulling out the Big Guns (heh) if it comes down to it. and STILL manages to be skilled enough to keep it non-lethal#the fucking Precision he needs in order to shoot nonlethally with his pinpoint accuracy is Insane#ok im a wolfwood girlie first and foremost but the more i think about Vash the more im drawing hearts around him in my mind#i think. im more in love with trimax vash than tristamp vash is the thing. i love them both but FUCK dude#trimax vash is just. hooooooooooooo boy#just like wolfwood. i prefer trimax wolfwood over tristamp wolfwood. that's just the facts#idk where im going with this. im just drawing hearts in my mind's eye around them Both now. there is no downside
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Ik the new show is laughably bad but and so scooby doo is on everyones minds but im going to start throwing shit if I have to hear tumblr user #258 talking about how THEY would make an adult scooby doo. Not everyones ideas are bad this website is just too predictable and annoying sometimes
#{ds;purplespinel}#this is like the least sm feeling social media site idk where else to go but like#when you dislike a thing that this site has decided to be obsessed with its very annoying#before someone comes at me im not saying i dislike scooby doo. i love scooby doo.#i liked it as a kid I watch it as an adult and i read fanfic sometimes.#but I often dislike like the kinds of 'adaptations' and 'rewrites' that get lots of reblogs here#like everyone writing them as adults is either writing them as college age or in their 50s. which is fine like its not problematic#i just think its boring#or like they're arguing over what to do w fred. or what velmas backstory would be. and most of the ideas tossed around disinterest me#does that make sense.#like aughhh daphne is a popular girl NO daphne is a loser who hangs out w outcasts#NO shes a lovable autistic NO she's the party bard NO shes the muscle of the group#like idk guys it sounds like you just wanna get the Coolest Most Creative Interpretation Award#why are we even arguing like... idk i think the characters have a decently well defined base!#and every interpretation is a little different and equally valid! so! nobody can really Win here
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not to say anything is seriously wrong with me but actually perhaps a bit yes that exactly because why has the past week of trying to sleep become an endeavor of attempting (futilely. valiantly sure but ultimately futilely) to trick my body into doing the precise opposite of what it ever wants to do 🚬😮💨
#j.txt#currently nearing 1 in the morning and much like the past 4 nights in a row my journey this evening has been:#eat dinner around 7. get Irrationally sleepy at my desk nearly passing out by ~830-9. go lay down for a moment thinking#'could it be that I just need to call it for the night and rest' Doze for 20mins. wake and decide to do some light reading-#or watch a chill vid to ease myself back to sleep except False ! Now filled with inescapable jittering energy that Will Not dissipate !#lie here getting increasingly frustrated/bored until abruptly passing out sometime around 4-5am. wake up at 11ish rinse and repeat#like genuinely I Do Not Know what to do anymore. grips self by the shoulders desperately Why. Why are you Energy. now of all times.#nyanyways . i finished rereading the novel i'd been using to fill my time for the past few days so guess im heading back to the trenches#(<novlupdates browsing)
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My friends who work at [redacted] are going THROUGH it
#called half of them this morning to make sure they’re alive#and they’re all just. kinda aimlessly hanging around their homes or offices without any real tasks#talking about how they’re living through a really long weekend#JUST LAY THEM OFF AND GIVE THEM SEVERANCE U ASSHOLES#J just told me that the upper upper management guy#gm that told them about the contract getting dissolved#just. Disappeared the day after.. it’s been a month and no one has heard from him#it’s all just so so frustrating for them#my job is boring sometimes but this is making me grateful for stability#I think. we should maybe have unions or something#I think it’s incredibly fucked up to hire someone with a relocation package of like 20k#and then be like oops! no more work for u! and expect them to pay it back#she’s been here less than 6 months.#why the fuck did u make her move and take away her work!#and then Brophy is looking for jobs w my company#but he’s also gonna have to pay back education if he leaves#ugh. it’s just an awful situation for all of them#he’s expecting a pay raise which is kinda wild#like buddy. gov work does not pay much and he’s aware of this#but he’ll get disabused of those notions eventually#I wish I had his level of confidence sometimes#delete later#Houston is going through it guys#all of this bullshit + the hurricane
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
#this is true#writeblr#warm up#relatedly for some reason one of our Favorite Jokes#amongst the Siblings#is like - ''this is so good u will love it''#while we are reacting to something we OBVIOUSLY find viscerally disgusting#like we will be actively retching and be like ''nooooo it's so good''#to the point that i sometimes get nervous if someone outside my family is like oh u should try it its good#(obvi we never force each other to eat anything. we are all just curious birds and#like. we're GONNA try the new thing.)#edit to answer why we had so much vanilla:#my mom is a very good cook and we LOVE to bake. so she just had a lot of staples in the house.#it's one of those things that's like. have u ever continuously thought ''ah i should get butter im probably out''#even tho u are not out of butter. so u end up with like 5 years of butter.#my mom would do that in a costco but like with vanilla extract#to be fair we WERE always using WAY TOO MUCH bc we were kids#so like she was right to stock up#ps. yes we were VERY sick after this lol i just didn't want to include it in the post in case ppl had an ick about that#u can tell it's real bc we knew "oh no we fucked up that's too much vanilla to waste'' but our reaction was to just. keep drinking it#> sibling understanding that vanilla extract isn't free > knowledge mother doesnt mind if we use it for milkshakes#> sibling choice to maybe get in a loophole of ''not wasting it'' if we drink it bc that's the same as using it (not throwing it out)#listen bud i was like 13 and my sister was like 9#when my mom discovered this we. got in. A LOT. of trouble. a lot of it. a LOT of it.#3rd edit bc i guess it isn't clear - i am 1 of my brother's 2 little sisters#i am the middle child#out of all the ways i have had to explain a post before being like ''did u forget a middle child can happen'' is my favorite
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Bruce: It's come to my attention that a paranormal being has made Wayne Manor its residence. I've hired Constantine and his team to remove-
Tim: BUT BRUCE I LOVE HIM!
Bruce: What-
Tim: Stop trying to tear us apart!
Bruce: Tim wait what are you-
Tim: You'll never made me break up with Danny! NEVER!
John watching Tim race up to his room where he senses the ghost boy: I may be taking a shot in the dark here, but I think that lad is dating a ghost.
Bruce: Timothy Jack Drake Wayne, did you sneak a boyfriend into this house?! Young man, you turn right back around! *running up the stairs yelling*
John: So Bruce has no problem with the lad being dead?
Alfred: Please, as if Master Tim is the only one who dated a ghost. I used to have a gentleman caller on the other side as well.
John: Blimey, and here I thought you were just boring and snotty. Who was the ex?
Alfred: Clockwork
John: .....I have never respected another man as much as I do you Alfred.
Alfred: Yes, well, make sure it stays at respect, young man. I don't find children attractive
John blushing and in a squeaky voice: Yes, sir.
Madame Xanadu by a circle of salt: Soooo does this mean we're still getting the ghost out?
Zatanna: We better. I don't want to watch John make a fool over himself over Alfred anymore, then I have to. That man is way out of his league.
Madame Xanadu: What does that have to do with the Ghost Boy?
Danny popping in the middle of the circle: I think it's cause she has feelings for him. Personally I can't see it. Sad trench coat man is famous in the Zone for being terrible in romantic communication-
Zatanna: Bind the circle! We got him!
Madame Xanadu pale: What have we done.....your royal majesty, please excuse this disrespect. We had no idea you were the ghost, I swear on my soul-
Danny: That's okay. I don't mind at all. This is cute actually *swipes salt* like when a little kid pretends to shoot you.
Zatanna: ......that was our strongest binding spell.
Danny: Like I said, cute. It's not nearly as cute as my boyfriend, though. Tim's cuteness broke the bar! By the way, Alfred, I have a message for you from Clockwork. He wants to know if you are willing to have dinner sometime?
Alfred: Been there, done that. And frankly, I feel it's rather pathetic of a high being sending his grandson to ask for a date.
Zatanna blushing: Okay, John, I get it.
#dcxdpdabbles#dcxdp crossover#from a fic i never wrote#Silver Fox Alfred#Dead Tired#Bruce is just mad That Tim snuck in a BF without telling him#Ghost King Danny#But DADDY I LOVE HIM
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aughhh ougbhhj i need to move somewherw with a train system
#i lvoe my shitty local bus i love it so much every day when i get off the bus i french the driver.#but i cannot do this anymore i need stability in my life i need a bus that comes every 15-30 not 45-90 i need. activities to go to.#was talking to my dad abt being bored n there not being much to do around here other than UF campus and he was like#oh i bet the farmers market is popping THE FARMERS MARKET? dgmr i love a good farmers market but brother i need adventure#back home at least there was the woods. and abandoned factories. and the retention pond. what do i have here... not even a used bookstore#i do see cats on campus sometimes so not all is lost
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older!rafe loves to put his fingers in sensitive!reader’s mouth & her favorite place in the world is his lap...
cw: mean older!rafe being a tease & making her choke on his fingers, heavily suggestive, size kink, use of daddy
wc: 1.6k
in love w this man so more of him on the way xx
this is an additional part to this & u can read more here
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Rafe has had a bad day.
She notices it immediately by the way he greets her with only a brief peck on her cheek; carelessly throwing his jacket on the couch before slumping down against the cushions and letting out a washed-out exhale.
For the entirety of the week, gloomy clouds have painted over the dusty, colorless horizon and wet water puddles have saturated the socks of passing pedestrians and dog walkers alike. However, Rafe is not someone who particularly minds rainy days, which is why she assumes that the reason for his disgruntled mood has something to do with business, as it more often than not does.
He scratches at the buzzed hair still slightly damp from the rain while she simply stands there and blinks; unsure whether he wishes to be alone or not.
“What are you doing? C’mere,” he suddenly orders in a somewhat of a stern tone and she has no choice but to pad over to his sprawled-out legs, lowering to sit on top of him and letting him paw at her waist as his beefy arms pull her closer. And she can't really complain when the heat of his body seeps into her flesh in such a comforting way; makes her insides feel all fluffy and featherlight.
In the same way that Rafe seems to enjoy her needing him to take care of her when everything feels like too much, she loves being there for him; likes to feel useful, needed.
“Do you wanna...talk about it?” The muted melody of her vocal cords reaches his ears as vivid raindrops pitter patter against the glass of the windows and he groans in exhaustion at how perfect she is for him.
“Not really,” he dismisses her with a shake of his head. “How was your day, hm?”
“It was uh, okay. I don’t know, the usual. Had some boring lectures, almost fell asleep…questioned every decision I’ve ever made,” she huffs out and settles her palms on his strong biceps.
“Mm,” he’s only half listening; beginning to mindlessly twirl a strand of her hair around his index finger.
And she takes that as her cue to continue blabbering out complete nonsense as she begins to grow slightly restless being this close to him. Truth be told, she’s pathetically been missing him the whole day; the only thing granting her the motivation to go about her routines being the thought of seeing him at the end of it all. And now that he’s here, he seems frustrated; mind entirely elsewhere and she doesn’t know what to do except ramble on and on about her dull day.
Then, completely out of the blue, he’s grabbing her jaw into his massive hand and hushing her.
“Shut up for one second, yeah?” He mutters out before he’s tucking a thumb past her lips; a surprised squeak leaving the back of her throat at the sudden intrusion because he was the one who asked for her to talk in the first place.
However, she can’t exactly say that it’s unexpected. He often gets a tad bit meaner whenever he’s had a dreary workday and takes it out on her in some form or another. And regardless of how unhealthy all of it might seem, there’s a crooked part of her brain that yearns for it; wants him to come to her whenever he’s upset. If she’s utterly honest, the thought of him searching for solace in anyone else makes nausea creep up her bones.
For some reason, the firm pad of his thumb making her tongue feel heavy in her mouth placates her; turns her brain into a needy, dingy muddle in a way that only Rafe is capable of.
“Shit, just needed something to suck on, huh?” He pushes down on her tongue, making her swallow around the digit with a whimper.
“So fucking pathetic sometimes, you know? Just take anything Daddy gives you,” a low-pitched chuckle thunders from his chest, seemingly amused by the ease in which she gives into him.
However, there’s also something gooey, syrupy beginning to whirl in the pit of her tummy. It reminds her of the countless times she was perched on the park swing as a little girl during the balmy summers of her childhood; thinking she could reach the fluffy clouds with the tips of her sneakers if only she could fly a little higher.
“Feels nice to have something in your mouth, doesn’t it?” He ogles at her, mesmerized with intrigue twinkling in the Carolina blue that has always made her think of the sky.
She lets out a faint moan when he drags the digit out and then back in, making her gag around it; her hips involuntarily rutting against the growing bulge straining against the zipper of his pants, desperate for some sort of friction if even through the soft material of her sweatpants.
“Didn’t give you permission to move, did I?” He feigns confusion with a furrow of his brows that gets her to reluctantly halt her shifting.
“Daddy, need your...” Her words are cushioned against the obstacle he’s planted between her teeth.
“Can’t really hear you, Kitten,” he mocks before he’s pulling the thumb out of her mouth altogether.
However, the next thing she knows, he’s stuffing in his index and middle finger both at the same time. They reach far deeper; a muffled sound of gagging following his actions as he seems to discover a perverted sense of satisfaction from her struggle.
"What did you say?" His lips twist into a cruel smirk when she whimpers pitifully and tries to draw away from him in order to catch her breath but his other hand only grips her jaw tighter, keeping her exactly where he wants as she’s forced to breathe through her nose.
“I think you can take it for a bit longer, yeah?” His teeth sink into his bottom lip as he simply stares, seemingly absorbed into the obscene scene before him.
And she should feel embarrassed, demeaned even. And she does! However, the humiliation of letting him do whatever he wants as if she’s nothing but a cheap toy for his entertainment blurs over the lines when her cunt throbs in response to his degrading attention. She flutters uselessly around nothing; powerlessly begging for some sort of alleviation with a whine that merely earns her a tut of his tongue.
Therefore, the only thing she can do is sit there like an obedient animal because he’s already scolded her once. She hasn’t turned entirely dumb just yet; knows firsthand how ‘Daddy doesn’t like to repeat himself’ and that the next time she misbehaves will result in a punishment her poor cunt probably wouldn’t be able to handle in this helpless state of hers.
“Don't think you could take Daddy’s cock even halfway in this pretty mouth,” he mindlessly croons, thumb smoothing over the skin of her throat as she swallows the spit beginning to dribble down her chin.
The thought manages to pique her curiosity because his cock has been at the forefront of her mind for a couple of weeks now, due to him constantly teasing her with the notion of letting her suck him off properly. He keeps murmuring about training her throat and fucking it raw but never actually doing it; merely allowing for her to drool and mouth over the tip because apparently, she's 'not ready yet'.
She’s beginning to turn into something desperate because whenever she tries to take more of him into her mouth, he stops her with a click of his tongue and big hands lifting her head off him. “Don’t be greedy now, Kitten,” he’d scold her but she's certain she’s going to die if she doesn’t get to feel his cock nudge at the back of her throat soon.
“Ray…” she tries to fruitlessly speak but he’s not exactly making it easy as he keeps stroking against her tongue. However, she doesn’t need to say anything. He knows what she wants.
“I mean, can barely fit into this tight cunt, don’t know why you keep whining about wanting me in this mouth so bad. Don’t think you’d even enjoy it that much. It’s a lot, you know?” There’s something almost patronizing in the way he’s speaking to her as if he’s not the one who brought the idea up in the first place.
It’s like he’s trying to talk her out of it yet his fingertips keep prodding past her gag reflex every few minutes, almost as if testing the waters before plunging in and it’s making her head spin.
She whines and tries to defend herself but the digits fussing with the inside of her slobbery mouth don’t allow for her to form anything audible as she begins to grow troubled.
“What was that?” The line of his mouth curls when he pokes deeper once more, causing her to moan with watery eyes pleading him for anything at this point.
“Such a dirty girl. Bet you’d like choking on my cock, huh?” He grunts and she hums in response; nodding fervently before he’s finally withdrawing his hand and smearing the spit-stained fingers against her pouty lips.
They’re both panting heavily as he gently swipes at her under-eyes in order to catch the teardrops ready to trickle down before petting at the apples of her cheeks with a tenderness reserved only for her.
“Shit, always know how to make me feel better, don’t ya?” He rumbles fondly against her mouth; following his saccharine words with a messy kiss soon after. Maybe he'll finally allow her to have what she so badly craves…
#I think he could cure me#my love for older men is unhealthy#but im just a girl#this was supposed to be v short but had too much to say ig#older!rafe#rafe cameron#rafe imagine#rafe obx#rafe outer banks#rafe smut#rafe x reader#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron x reader#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron obx#older!rafe cameron#drew starkey#obx smut#obx fic#obx#obx fanfiction#outer banks#outer banks fanfiction#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron blurb#sensitive!reader
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