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aliceintheworld · 3 months ago

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PURE ATTRACTION | JJK | TATTOO ARTIST

Pairing: TattooArtistJungkook X NaiveReader

Summary: "I shouldn't be watching a man undressing, especially not from the house next door."

Warning: Suicide (this is a serious topic, please be careful), depression, alcoholism, toxic relationship, intolerance, shy reader (this will pass someday), extremely cute Jungkook 😊 and Gureum (JK's former dog) 😫🙏

A/N: Hi again! I came back earlier than expected, but since I already have a good part of the story written, it wasn't too much work (this won't happen all the time). The themes of this chapter are difficult, so please be careful while reading. It's a short chapter because it’s still an introduction to the story. Things will start happening quickly from now on. Just know that in advance 👀

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Chapter 2

I read the words from my favorite book, The Notebook, and even though every time I open its pages, I’m transported to another dimension, this time it doesn’t happen. I shift uncomfortably in my bed, feeling anxious. My mind is filled with thoughts yet simultaneously empty.

After dinner tonight, I couldn’t accomplish much. I took a shower and tried to watch a documentary I was excited to start, but it failed to capture my attention and did nothing to ease my worries about my neighbor, Misuk. Like her, my father also suffered from depression. I was just a child of 11 when I remember the first time he attempted to take his own life. I was young, but the weight of caring for him, even in terms of his mental health, felt heavy. My father would lie in bed all day, and not knowing what to do, I tried to bring him some comfort: getting good grades, making him proud, being affectionate and smart, asking for nothing from him except for what was essential for my survival.

My mother was incredibly strong; she worked at a marketing company almost all day, and when she came home, she would cook and help me with my math homework. I would sometimes catch her crying while cooking or cleaning up the daily mess, but she always said she was fine and put on a smile. I also remember that my father would occasionally have bursts of happiness. For at least a day, the man he used to be would return—energetic, funny, playful. It was only after some time that I, in my innocence, realized that this was worse. It gave us hope that the hard times would pass, that it was just a difficult moment, and that we didn’t need to worry because the turbulence would eventually subside.

But it didn’t pass. It got worse. With depression, came dependency. My father refused to take his prescribed medication and drank heavily every day. He would start in the morning and continue until nightfall. I felt fortunate if he collapsed on the couch and lost consciousness. Sometimes he would become aggressive, and I would retreat to my room, practically staying there all day. That’s how I began to find solace in reading. Books transported me to another world, more colorful and beautiful. My father, inebriated, didn’t exist in any other universe but my own, and that was comforting.

My parents started to argue; my mother was exhausted from holding everything together for months. One night, she pleaded with him to return to who he used to be, or else she would kick him out. He became so furious that he destroyed my grandmother's old wardrobe, and the only reason he didn’t hurt my mother was that he was too drunk to even reach her. I remember her grabbing my arms and dragging me upstairs, as we heard the car start and speed away from the garage. We only learned hours later that my father had died because he had my mother’s emergency contact saved on his phone. He had suffered a severe accident, crashing his car into a tall concrete wall.

A week after the funeral, my mother went to church for the first time. It became her balm, her ark in the midst of that flood, and I accompanied her without questioning or hesitating. I was so young and didn’t understand much; it felt like a relief. I wasn’t sad; I was happy. Happy that my father, the one I loved so much, was finally gone. The weight of worry, of caring for him, no longer existed. Confessing this to myself, much later, was difficult, but it was the truth. I was happy he had died because, for the first time in a long while, I didn’t have to sacrifice my childhood to look after him. I only had to take care of myself, and no one else.

I think of Misuk once more and find her depression reminiscent of my father's. Aside from that, she is completely different from him. I visited her house last month, and I would never have known what had happened if it weren’t for Jungkook. A tear rolls down my face uncontrollably. My throat tightens as I taste bitterness in my mouth. I feel relief that she hasn’t been able to follow through with her plan, relief because now I understand what she’s going through, and I can finally help her. I was a child when my father died and didn’t comprehend much, but now I can do things differently. I can help her, support her, and be there for her during tough times.

I rise from my bed with newfound energy as an idea flashes in my mind. I sneak into the kitchen in the early hours, trying not to make much noise and wake my mother. I walk through the dark hallway of my house to the kitchen, searching the cupboard for an old recipe book my grandmother left for my mother and me.

My mother never liked cooking, but I do. I’ve always enjoyed making desserts, and knowing I can brighten my neighbor’s day, I decide to prepare a treat. Patbingsu, a frozen dessert with sweet red bean, takes a few hours to make, but it’s easy to follow. I begin gathering the ingredients and organizing everything, only realizing how much time has passed when a deep sleepiness overtakes me and the sun begins to rise through the window.

I glance at my phone’s clock, my eyes widening. It’s now 6 a.m. I look at the dessert, adorned with fruits in a pot I set aside, and panic when I realize that the ice, if not consumed promptly, would become terrible. I smack my forehead in disbelief at my own foolishness. Biting my lower lip, I’m at a loss for what to do. It’s very early, and my neighbors might still be asleep. On the other hand, if I don’t deliver the dessert to them, I’ll likely lose both my recipe and the hours of sleep I sacrificed to make it.

I curse myself, weighing the pros and cons of each option. I decide to peek out the window into the neighboring house, searching for any lights on or signs of movement that might indicate my neighbors are awake. Nothing happens. I huff in disappointment. I decide not to deliver my dessert to Misuk; the mistake was mine for being impulsive and not thinking things through before acting. I step away from the window, feeling disheartened and sad, when suddenly the front door of the neighboring house swings open. Jungkook appears out of nowhere, barefoot and wearing a sweatshirt that nearly covers his hands.

I smile as I watch his sleep-laden face while he stretches and rubs his eyes, still groggy from sleep. He seems to be waking up a bit, opening the door to the house again. That’s when my trance breaks. This is the perfect moment to deliver the pot of sweets to his mother. I dash forward like a madwoman, not bothering to take off my apron or put on my slippers, grabbing everything in a hurry. I nearly trip over the flowers in front of my door, but I don’t stop.

“Jungkook! Jungkook!” I shout desperately. A few seconds later, I realize it’s still morning, and I might wake everyone up, so I run even faster to his door. I use all my body and agility to get there before the door closes, thinking he didn’t hear me and that, like an idiot, I wouldn’t make it in time. But the door opens again, and he only sticks his head out, one eye closed as if the sunlight is too much for him at this hour.

A happy, proud smile spreads across my face. I refrain from jumping with joy, knowing that would be excessive and he might think I’m crazy.

“Y/N?” he asks, his voice hoarse as if he’s seeing a mirage. “Good morning, how are you?”

“Good morning,” I reply with a smile. Then I realize I must be interrupting him with all this shouting, and finally, the embarrassment washes over me. “I’m sorry, it’s morning.”

“Yes, it is,” he says, looking me up and down; my apron is crooked, and my hair is a mess. I don’t blame him; he looks awake but not entirely ready. It’s almost as if he just crawled out of bed to greet the morning sun. I must be ruining his peace.

“I’m really sorry again, it’s just that…” I trail off, glancing at the pot in my hands. “I made a little something to sweeten your mother’s day. I hope she likes it.”

“You cooked?” he asks, raising an eyebrow in disbelief. “What time?”

“Almost now,” I reply softly, my voice short and hesitant. “I can deliver it to her later, if you want.”

“It’s 6:30 now,” he says, as if still trying to wrap his head around things. He doesn’t seem like a morning person, judging by his demeanor. “Come in, please.”

“No!” I respond quickly, my voice rising. My eyes widen in embarrassment. “You don’t have to; I just came to drop this off for her.”

“Just come in. I just need to wash my face and brush my teeth.” He smiles for the first time, a dimple forming on his cheek, and his doe dark eyes squint. “Come on, I insist.”

“Alright,” I whisper, feeling shy. I take small steps toward the door. I realize I have to pass by him to enter the house, and before I know it, I’m inside. The house is silent, and a small white puppy scurries around my feet, recognizing my presence. I smile, bending down to his level.

“This is Gureum,” Jungkook says from behind me. I nod.

“Your mom told me she adopted him.” I pet his ear, finding it amusing how his fluffy tail wags back and forth. “He wasn’t here last night.”

“Actually, he was, but in my room. My dad is allergic, so until we can get the medication, we keep him mostly to my room.” He explains. I turn to him, nodding in agreement. “I’ll wash my face and be right back.”

“You don’t have to bother; I just want to deliver this.” I repeat, feeling awkward.

“It’s no bother. You can sit on the couch; I’ll be right back.” Before I can respond, he hurries up the stairs, as if afraid I might vanish if he takes too long.

I sit on the couch, hearing the sound of tiny paws behind me. Gureum is so adorable and affectionate, and being small, he has to lift both front paws to reach my hands for pets. I laugh when he licks my hand, tilting his head as if expecting more affection. Minutes pass until Jungkook appears again, this time wearing a tight black t-shirt and a headband that keeps his dark hair pushed back. I forget about Gureum, mesmerized. He is incredibly handsome—almost like a literary character come to life right in front of me. My cheeks flush, and my heart races. For some reason, I like him very much. Since the first time I saw him, I have this feeling.

“Now we can talk,” he smiles, pulling up his gray sweatpants. “I really needed to brush my teeth… you know.”

“Yeah,” I agree, unsure of what to say. He sits on the couch, just a few inches away from me, and that alone makes me nervous. “I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to give this to your mom, but at the same time, I didn’t want to wake her. When I saw you, I just…”

“Wanted to hand it over,” he finishes, smiling. I nod in agreement. “It’s alright. It’s really kind of you to do this. My mom has been waking up later because of her medication, so it was a good idea to talk to me.”

“Thank you,” I say sincerely. He laughs suddenly at my answer, throwing his head back. His white teeth show, and curiously, his two front ones are slightly larger than the others, giving him a cute smile. It's very funny. I want to laugh with him, even though I’m still confused about why he’s laughing.

“Why are you thanking me? You made the sweets!” He justifies his laughter, still chuckling. I grin in embarrassment, hiding my face with my hands.

“I don’t know. I guess I feel guilty for coming to talk to you at this hour.” I shrug.

“Is that the kind of person you are?”

“What do you mean?” I ask, not understanding.

“A nice person,” Jungkook clarifies, smiling at me. His eyes meet mine for a few seconds, and the nervousness I felt earlier comes back stronger. I try to smile, fiddling with my nails, feeling awkward. “Thank you for bringing this dessert. What is it?”

“Patbingsu,” I say, feeling a bit more at ease. Talking about food calms me down. “It’s made with sweet beans and fruits; it’s very healthy.”

“Can I try some? I love patbingsu,” he asks, tilting his head to the side. I nod, opening the glass pot’s lid. He reaches for a fruit, and I can’t help but notice the tattoos adorning his pale arm. I swallow hard, feeling a shiver run down my spine.

His right arm is covered in various designs that stretch down to his fingertips. A flower, a tiger and a phrase that reads “Winners Never Quit” are the only things I can distinguish quickly. I try to focus on something else, but it’s nearly impossible. He is incredibly handsome, much taller than me, exuding confidence and assurance. His scent is the same as yesterday, so good that I wish I could close my eyes to concentrate and feel more; his breath is even fresher from the toothpaste he just used. His hair pushed back draws even more attention to his smooth neck, speckled with beauty marks that, if it weren’t for genetics, I’d say were strategically placed to drive me wild. One specific mole, just below his lower lip, takes my breath away. He moans as he chews on a blueberry, and my already shallow breath nearly escapes me completely. He opens his eyes, frowning as if the fruit were the most delicious thing he’s ever tasted.

“It’s delicious. Really sweet,” he says, licking his lips. “You should try some.” He picks up a strawberry, dipping it in the sweet milk and sugar ice and brings it close to my mouth. I can’t refuse, my cheeks burning with embarrassment. I bite into the red fruit, trying not to graze the tips of his fingers, but Jungkook seems unbothered by it and offers the whole thing without hesitation. I can almost taste his skin along with the food, the way he hands it to me without much care. I try not to choke, overwhelmed by what he’s doing to me, unable to say a word.

I swallow everything without uttering a peep. He leans back on the couch, spreading his legs, pausing for a moment to observe me. I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, incapable to meet his gaze. He draws me in like some sort of supernatural force, and I can’t fathom how I’ll manage to be near him every time I see him.

“You’re so kind,” he suddenly whispers to himself. I turn to look into his eyes, trying to understand him. “Thank you so much for caring for my mom in this way. I’m at a loss for words.”

“You don’t have to thank me.”

“I do,” he insists without hesitation. “My mom needs more people like you around her. I’m glad to have you here with her.”

“Jungkook... I... Your mom is very important to me. You really don’t have to thank me. I couldn’t sleep thinking about her, and I decided to bring this because I know she’s feeling deep pain right now.” I say, feeling brave and determined. I need to tell him this. “I appreciate you confiding in me about what you told me last night. I promise I’ll do everything I can to take care of her and be there for her. Her secret is completely safe with me.”

“I know that,” he assures, smiling slightly. He bends down to give Gureum a gentle pat, who is now lying near his feet. He looks back at me, nodding. “I’ll make it up to you somehow. You can count on that.”

Ask for a TAGLIST in the comments.

@ttipa @ane102

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devinescribe · 3 months ago

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Protector

Octavian x Reader

Genre: Fluff, hurt comfort quite literally.

I think lots of people gloss over the fact that the camp Jupiter mark is not just a tattoo it’s quite literally branded on the kids. In one of the books, Apollo even mentions how ruthless the Romans are compared to the Greeks for honor and to seem strong. So here is young Octavian and his best friend who just got to the camp and what that would be like!

At camp Jupiter, kids were branded with the mark of their godly parent or ancestor. Below that a line to represent how many years they had been there.

Before you knew that, you liked to trace Octavian’s mark, a lyre, the mark of Apollo, with a single line under it.

To you it was pretty. You found it to be soothing, though he winced if you pressed too hard. He had gotten it about a month before you got there, and it didn’t hurt anymore as it had healed, but it was more out of habit.

Octavian told you that you would also get yours soon. It just seemed that it took a bit longer than usual.

The day you were brought in, an older kid went before you. You squeezed your white bunny plush in one arm and squeezed Octavian’s hand in your own.

You were nervous. They had told you to leave your dogs back. No one told you why, but you did as they said you could bring Octavian in their place.

However as you stand outside, you realize why. The kid before you screamed in pain. You jumped back and hid behind Octavian.

“Nonono, ‘Tavi don’t let them hurt me please I don’t wanna-“ you whispered to the blond boy, clutching his shirt and his hand.

“You’ve gotta… it’s okay… I-i know… Nex and Maledicta aren’t here… but I am, and I won’t leave you…” he tried to comfort you, knowing how much you relied on your dogs for comfort and protection. He swore to himself he would be that for you right now.

You went in and the other kid left. The person who was doing these marks was an older camper… daughter of Mercury. You sat down and squeezed Octavians hand.

There was no warning when she started, just the sharp blistering burn. Tears came to your eyes and a sharp scream echoed through the temple.

It felt like your nerves were being tugged at one by one, plucked like a cruel guitar, sharp claws of searing, burning pain scratching deep into you.

You tried your hardest to stay still and not scream again, but you couldn’t. You squirmed and cries left your mouth.

Octavian gripped your hand, felling helpless to stop your pain. After all, he had been in this spot a few months prior. Except all alone.

“Oh my gods stop being such a baby. What? Can’t even handle a little pain, huh? Just like your mother- you can cause trouble and pain but can’t take it?” She scoffs, laughing at your tears.

Octavian was pissed. How could someone be so cruel to you?

“Shut up!” Octavian shouted. “She’s stronger than you’ll ever be and she’s more than her parentage and you know it!”

His voice cracked from the emotion, but the daughter or Mercury simply laughed and continued.

You cried and sniffled, pulling Octavian closer.

It felt like a part of your own soul was being burned out in place for the binding mark.

Was the honor even worth it?

Everything you had done to get here, was any of it worth it?

The pain was so great it had you feeling inadequate of being here at Camp Jupiter.

“It’s almost over, Y/N. You’re doing so well. I’m right here. Just keep breathing, okay? Nex and Maledicta would be proud of you. They’d be here growling at this idiot if they could, but you’re strong even without them, even if it doesn’t feel like it.” He whispered, desperately trying to comfort you.

He felt so… useless as he held your hand. All he could do was talk and hold you.

After it was done, you stood up shakily. Your arm felt hot, and you were dizzy. He helped you stand up, glaring at everyone in the room who watched and laughed at your misery and agony.

The older girl looked at the mark, the blistering lines and agitated skin around it.

“I hope it hurt,” she smiled the biggest sweetest smile.

“I-I’m so-sorry,” you sniffle, apologizing to the blond as he took you into his arms, hiding your face into his chest as he helped you out.

“It’s okay… it’s okay… if Nex and Maledicta were here they’d be growling and snapping at anyone who dared to hurt you, I know… but for now I’m here a-and I’ll do my best to help a-and protect you… no one will ever hurt you again I promise you,” he whispered.

This moment of weakness and vulnerability from you made him grow a bubbling pit of hatred for everyone who hurt you and laughed.

Later you were both sitting under a tree, Nex and Maledicta both lying in front of you at your feet.

You lay your head on Octavian’s shoulder. He had wrapped your mark putting an ice pack on top of it.

“I promise you… no one will ever hurt you again… I won’t let them…” he whispered, squeezing you tightly.

#×reader #fluff #hurt comfort #hehe they’re so cute #he’s so bbg #octavian x reader #octavian pjo #percy jackson heroes of olympus #octavian #I love him #he’s hated #but I love him

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waytooobsessedwithmcyt · 2 days ago

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anywyas i think i went too feral (AUGH I REFERENCED FERAL LIKE DOGS LIKE GEM NOOO) in your askbox so here’s another free redeemable excuse to infodump for the future :3 (ill prob send you one everytime one of the redeemables are answered so you always have an excuse :3)

-🎞️📹

Ok I was planning to use this for when I figured out Bigb's lore but inspiration struck so here's a un-proofread and un-betaed fanfic about Grian and Gem meeting

Tw for implied self harm and implied abuse under the read more

The light wind blew through his parrot feathers, rustling like leaves in a tree. It picked up a collection of falling leaves and danced them around like a miniature tornado. She was watching again. That was supposed to be his job. He knew she was there. She knew he knew. It wasn’t a peace they’d reached, but something else, an agreement that they would rip the other apart, but that neither would instigate. He’d never seen her in whole, but the flick of a gray ear, the padding in the forest when he was silent, and flashes of a tail let him know exactly what she was. Tonight the moon was empty, he walked home purposefully slowly, avoiding her never worked, but she always seemed to relax when he went slow.

Faint footsteps trailed after him, nearly silent to anyone not paying attention. He wanted to meet her, but she would always run away. Tonight felt different, she was closer than usual. He walked closer to the forest and her footsteps didn’t move away. He hoped for a sparse bit of plants that he could see her through, but all he caught was a glimpse of red hair, looking brown in the dark night.

“I think I’m done with this game,” he whispered, the footsteps stopped and he did too. They picked up again, she was running away. He tried to peer through the bushes, but the girl was already disappearing. Tucking in his wings, he dove through the bush, falling onto the dirty ground. He tripped over invisible roots as he tried to get up, but he got a small glance at the girl. He reached out with a hand, half looking for anything to steady himself and half trying to stop her from running. His hand clasped around her wrist and stopped her from running.

“Get off of me!” She cried, trying to rip her wrist away. This was the first time he’d heard her speak, she spoke with a similar accent to what his had been, though much higher pitched. The accent gave him pause, it was the first time in nearly 2 years he’d heard anyone except himself talk like that.

“Wait, I’m not trying to hurt you!” The girl had red hair, her gray wolf-like ears were pinned back against her head, despite the clear anger on her face, there was also something underneath that, it was fear. Whoever this girl was, she was terrified of him.

“I’m just doing what I was told, please don’t-” her anger began to melt, he saw her begin to hyperventilate, becoming more desperate in pulling her hand away. If he let her go now, she’d run away and he’d never have another chance. Under where he was grabbing her was a Watcher’s symbol. It was glowing a slight purple and everytime it lit up brighter, the girl winced and took a gasp of air, it must be hurting her in some way. On her neck was a tattoo of a collar, she looked like she was trying to cover it up, tugging at her shirt until it was half covered.

“I’m not gonna hurt you, just don’t run away, I’m not going to hurt you,” He didn’t mean to talk to her like a scared puppy, but he reached out an arm to try and calm her. She shifted her weight from foot to foot like a hunting dog pulling on the leash. “What’s your name?” He asked as gently as possible.

“Gemini,” Her eyes were wide, her hands shook as she spoke, she wasn’t pulling away as desperately anymore though.

They still didn’t put any effort into names, just naming them after their star sign. “Do you… like that name?”

“It doesn’t matter if I do or not, I can’t change it.”

“I’m asking you though, what name would you prefer?”

Her face was a weird combination of fear, sadness, and confusion, “I- just Gem I guess.”

“Grian,” Grian dropped Gem’s hand.

“I know.”

“Right,” Grian laughed, “You were sent to keep an eye on me, kind of ironic for a species called the Watchers.”

“You’re going to get me in trouble if I keep talking with you,” Gem took a couple of steps back, her Watcher symbol glowing.

“Wait,” he couldn’t let her leave, “I can disable that.”

“Don’t do that,” Gem whispered, “Please please don’t do that, they'll just hurt me more.”

Grian felt fierce protectiveness over this girl he’d just met, “What do they do to you?”

“Nothing I’m not trained to handle,” A fake smile crossed Gem’s face, a facade of the girl who he’d thought had been stalking him.

“I didn’t ask that, I asked what they’re doing to you,” Grian needed to know what horrors she’d been through to turn out like this.

Gem had completely closed down, all traces of emotion were gone from her face, when she spoke, it was in a carefully practiced and contained manner, “I’m sorry for my slip-up, I messed up, I should not have gotten scared of you.”

“Do you have a place to sleep? I have a guest room you can stay in,” He wasn’t going to let Gem go wandering by herself.

“I don’t want to be a burden, I’m content out here.”

Being gentle wasn’t working, he was going to feel terrible but if he wanted to get through to her he’d have to be a little more forward, “Walk by me, we’re going back to my house.”

“Why would I go anywhere with you,” Gem crossed her arms. Anger was better than a blank slate at least.

“Because I like helping people.”

“Why?”

“You’re so suspicious! I’m trying to help.”

“I don’t need help.”

“Debatable.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Gem growled.

“You have two options, get home with me and let me get you food and a bed, or tell me what the Watchers do to you, I won’t make you talk in the first option,” Grian could tell Gem was thinking through the options.

“Fine, I’ll go home with you,” she relented. Her hand pulled at her clothes absentmindedly.

Grian took a step out of the woods, Gem followed. As she stepped out into the streetlight, Grian got a full look at her. Her hair was an orange red and her gray ears were actually tan with an orange tint, her tail was almost as fluffy as a fox tail, but clearly not well taken care of, it was coated in dirt. Her fingernails were long and sharp and her canine teeth were bigger than a humans. Her face was speckled with freckles and her eyes were bright green.

She was also covered in scars, her legs had tiny cuts that looked more like a knife than from thorns or scrapes. She hid her arms behind her back before he got a good look, but there was one huge scar along her entire forearm. He was one hundred percent going insane, this woman was trying to kill him, but she really just looked like she needed a hug.

Her eyes skittered around his wings like a scared deer. She was hunched over, but still taller than him, her ears were tucked beneath her hair and her tail was tucked between her legs.

Grian was going to get her out of the Watcher's hands or die trying.

#watcher grian #geminitay #puppets and puppeteers au #grian #implied abuse #implied sh

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excelsior9173 · 2 months ago

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…

this is… a tough one. idk. it feels bad but i’m also at the point where it’s like, it is what it is, y’know?

my sister and i are very much the black sheep in the family as far as my dad’s side is concerned

and i think the worst part of that is that we didn’t do anything but be ourselves- dad’s family takes the fact that they never liked our mom out on us kids. we’re too much like her.

for me at least it’s always been subtle. i wasn’t always a problem, or undesirable. my sister had always had it harder, i gradually fell out of favour with them. i feel so distant when i visit, i’m close with my one cousin and that’s about it. everyone else sort of feel like strangers at this point. they’re getting bolder with their distaste too- try to veil it behind humour but it’s starting to get pretty blatant

i knew they’d poke fun at my colourful hair and facial piercing and i knew they’d hate it when i got tattoos (shocker- my grandma can barely bring herself to look at my ink) but the comments have gotten more blunt. convinced my cousin to get matching tattoos with me, she loves it and is planning more! my uncle has “jokingly” lectured me/confronted me about it three times now. like he’s trying to play it cool but is pissed that i have “corrupted” his precious daughter i think. he’s a control freak and i took that control away my grandma straight up flinched when i walked out of a camp bathroom in shorts and said “i’ll never get used to those tattoos”. like thanks, grandma, but i didn’t get them for you to enjoy them. all that shit is kind of water off a ducks back now, i expected those reactions, i was prepared for them. i don’t really care it’s honestly rather entertaining to me to see how much they’ll tie themselves in knots over choices i make for my own body.

the part that really made me realize i was falling out of favour as opposed to my cousin who can do no wrong in their eyes (i don’t hold it against her, i love her dearly and she was the closest thing i had to a sister growing up- until my sis transitioned) was my university convocation.

my cousin convocated last year, and i convocated in june. it was a whole big thing for my cousin! everyone came to see, we all took pictures with her, went out for a nice meal and had champagne to celebrate. my convocation? idk the family all came, we took a few pictures, went out and had lunch. they gave me their gifts and then everyone left- they had other plans to get to. i just- it felt like there was a lot less fanfare and celebration around it all. it was all “good job exie, but your cousin did it first and she has a grown up job related to her degree so 🤷‍♀️” they all ask my cousin how work is going, they ask her questions related to her degree, all that stuff. i get none of the same treatment. occasionally i’ll get asked something psych-related, but it always feels like they’re asking for the sake of being able to make a point. like i’m just a research engine and there’s no interest in my education. i genuinely wonder if any of them will even care once i get my next degree. it’s the same thing with holiday/birthday gifts. i feel like there’s thought and intent when they get gifts for my cousin, and for my sibling and i it’s just… random shit. the worst part is that my dad and aunt have asked for wishlists. my dad makes an attempt- his gifts are always thoughtful, last year he got me a heated sweater because i do dog walks in very cold weather. but the rest of his family? i got a mug and some froofy soaps and some kitschy novelty booze glasses (i have maybe a drink a month. except for new years and august long). even after they ask for a list :) i think i have become a stranger to them. my interests are so foreign and uncomfortable that they won’t even make an attempt at this point.

i kind of thought it would hurt more. realizing that i am not loved to the same extent as my cousin. that my sister, if they knew the truth, would be loved even less than i am now. but it doesn’t. i feel kind of numb to it. like i guess i knew this was inevitable. i would never be the perfect niece/grandkid. and i’m not saying it doesn’t hurt- it does, but it’s sort of like a long, old ache. it’s been hurting so gradually for so long that it’s sort of just a part of me. it doesn’t feel as bad as it is because i’m used to it. and that sucks to say. but it is what it is. i am not going to compromise any part of myself to earn the approval of people who can’t be bothered to even attempt to understand.

there’s more i wanted to say, or perhaps i wanted to say this all differently. idk. but that’s my rant tonight lol. family is great but it also fucking sucks.

#exie vents #family issues #family is fucking hard #i love them. i do. but it feels rather detached #why invest my love into people who will never fully appreciate who i am?#this vent is really really long wow. too much to say and very little substance i think #honestly at this point i’m happiest with my mom my dad and my sister. i don’t need much else for family #i’m done trying to contort myself to fit in the box they want me in.#our mom tried so hard to keep her conflict with them away from us kids #she played nice for our sake. but it never fucking mattered #we are still her kids. and that’s sin enough for them #how dare we be raised to believe in bodily autonomy and freedom of expression

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imaginespazzi · 2 months ago

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Nivi, you’ve done it again. Whenever I think a chapter can’t get any better you always out do yourself.

I loved the opening scene at the championship game. The UConn ND interactions were fun. What team is KK on? It didn’t seem like she was on the Wings with Paige and Ice or the Valkyrie with Jana and Azzi. Also, was Lou still on the Wings when Paige got drafted? Did they win a championship together? I hope they finally got to play together, I need it to happen in some universe 🙏🏻

The collateral damage gets me every time because their lives are so intertwined. The way you wrote that scene I just felt everyone’s perspective, and that’s a credit to your writing. (As an aside I just joined a book club and the book I had to read was terrible. The author was explaining everything without making you feel anything and that’s such a terrible combo) So then coming back and reading this chapter was such a breath of fresh air because you make the reader feel everything. I felt KK being disappointed and hurt that she felt like Azzi was running away again, when really she missed seeing her friend, and was frustrated that they kept coming back to the same place. And I felt Jana being protective because she see’s more of Azzi’s perspective after being around her the most. I also felt Paige and Azzi’s guilt of having done this to the people they love.

Ugh that damn phone call that Paige obviously does not remember 💔 I feel like it’s gonna come up again, and I’m curious and scared to see what Paige’s reaction is going to be. Especially knowing how much it has left a scar on Azzi. That’s gonna be such a hard revelation to hear and process.

Ahhh using their numbers for the floors was a nice touch. 3 & 5 for Azzi, but then getting off at 5 for Paige. Also using the 2 floors to make Azzi’s number to show she’s complete when they are together, and then Azzi goes back to being incomplete when she leaves.

Paige opening the door and Azzi was right there 🥹, Azzi being self conscious about her post pregnancy body and Paige already has it ingrained in her memory 🥹 So wait how many times have they hooked up since their break up? Only twice? Was the start of this chapter their first time sleeping together post breakup? Or did they hook up more but only twice since Azzi had Stephie? Of course the tattoo would be purple, Azzi just couldn’t help herself huh? 😭

Awww Azzi finally saying what Paige needed to hear so badly, that she wasn’t a secret. Man, Azzi has done some serious emotional heavy lifting for Paige in the matter of a few hours. She agrees to go to the bar with Paige, she confesses that Paige is the exception to all of her rules, calls her baby again, supportively tells Paige she’ll catch her during an intimate moment that holds so many meanings, Azzi leaving but coming back, and then finally telling Paige she isn’t a secret and doesn’t want to hide her. Omg we’re finally getting some progress with these two idiots and I love it so much 🥹

lol I love everyone being a menace around them, Katie was enjoying that entirely too much.

Stephie is a top tier manipulator and I love that for her, she really is a genius. She was already promised ice cream, fries, and the park from Paige for not getting to go to the bar and still manages to add on more junk food because she was sad they had a sleep over without her. And finally Stephie’s manipulation works in Paige and Azzi’s favor. I’m sure Katie had the biggest knowing smile on her face when that happened too.

Excited to see where you take us in the next chapter 🙂‍↔️

——📚

Thank you bestie <3

I think KK's on the Sky? I have no reason for this other than I just like the Sky and vibes lmao. Yeah Lou would have still been on the team when Paige got drafted (2025) but I don't think she stuck around for long and eventually chose to play in France long-term.

Both Jana and KK are completely valid. KK really just misses her friend and Jana's the one who's watched her friend breakdown (remember she was there for the phone call) and so it's only natural that she's rather protective over Azzi now.

They've only hooked up twice since Azzi got pregnant and there was never any overlap with Olivia. However was there a time before that? Guess we'll find out!

YES! Azzi's taken so many baby steps in their relationship and I'm glad y'all see it took. Like my girl is genuinely trying even if there's still some hesitation at certain times.

One thing Stephie knows how to do is get her Miss Buecks to give her what she wants and trust she will use it every damn time.

#ask #fic talk #📚 anon my bookie #notes time with nivi 💅#ah yes the next chapter *deep sigh*

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she-posts-nerdy-stuff · 2 years ago

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*Shadow and bone season 2 spoiler warning!!!*

It’s time to talk about the costumes in season 2. I did not think that it was possible to top what the costume department pulled of in season one but damn if they didn’t outdo themselves!!!!

Miracles were performed.

First of all, the Kefta redesigns for the Darkling’s grisha were absolutely brilliant. The costumes featured mostly the same colour choices to represent each order, but in darker tones and with different styles of embroidery to their Little Palace counterparts. This is a physical representation of their allegiance to the Darkling, creating a clear divide between his grisha and those loyal to Alina, but I think it could possibly also represent the fact that their power has been warped by an amplifier from someone born of merzost, since it means they no longer fit in with the other grisha. This could possibly even be foreshadowing the way Nina feels that she can no longer fit in with other grisha after her power is changed by parem, since she believes her new abilities to be closer to merzost than the small science. The new costuming for the Darkling’s grisha also includes a tattoo on their hands, and although I don’t want to talk about it in too much detail here because I’m planning a post with specific focus on that tattoo, I did want to mention it as a very interesting aspect of their appearances that once again separates them from the other grisha. The Darkling’s own Kefta has also been redesigned, I don’t have anything to say about it that hasn’t already been talked about by Ben Barnes and Jessie Mei Li in interviews and the costume department tour video, but basically they said that the gold detailing represents the tether and the way the Darkling and Alina now share some of each other’s powers and I absolutely love that detail!

What’s interesting about Genya’s costume is that she never gets a redesigned Kefta when she’s still with the Darkling, but returns to the red and blue she wore at the end of season one. This represents her allegiance not fully lying with the Darkling, or by this point not at all, but it’s also the Kefta she was wearing when Alina felt she had betrayed her; creating a painful and permanent reminder to the audience of the way Genya has been manipulated and abused even through the control of her friends so that she had no-one left to trust, or who she believes will trust her. No-one except David, who also never wears a redesigned Kefta. One of my favourite things about Genya’s costuming, however, was that they put her in her civilian clothes when she was attacked by the Darkling and the nichevo’ya. This was incredibly powerful, because it highlighted her complete lack of power: in this scene she was not a soldier, she was not a member of the Second Army or any kind of rebellion, she was not even a Tailor. In this scene she was just a girl who had been hurt, manipulated, and abused, and who had run out of places to hide. For me, it made this moment even more painful and even more powerful because it was her renouncing what she said to Alina - “I am his soldier” - and forcing the audience to witness her pain as exactly what Alina replied: “We are his pawns. Nothing more”.

The only thing I would change about Genya’s costuming, is that I would have given her a veil after the attack. For me reading the book, Genya’s veil became a brilliantly important symbol as a physical manifestation of her psychological progress. When she eventually sheds the veil, it is because she feels that she is safe to do so and it’s Alina that helps her come to that conclusion. Both seasons have proven to us that the costume department are FANTASTIC at bringing symbols and little details to life, and I think they could have had an absolute field day with this.

The only other thing about costumes written in my notes is “whoever gave Jesper a skirt deserves a raise, but could they have given him a skirt that went with the rest of the suit a bit better?” but honestly I’m rewatching right now and the combo of that suit and that skirt is growing on me.

…Sorry for yet another massively long post. I’m very excited.

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rowanaelinn · 2 years ago

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Illicit Affairs - Chapter Fourty-Seven

Masterlist

A/N: I know it’s been a while I’m so sorry!!! But even if you hate me after this chapter, can you wish me luck? I’m taking my third driver test tomorrow and I would really like to pass this time LMAOO

Warnings: general dose of angst | Word Count: 6,000

December 24th,

Aelin threw herself on the bed she was sharing with her cousin, finally wrapped her in her warm pajamas, and let out the longest breath known to mankind. Aedion was sitting the same way she did, staring at the wall.

“I had sex with Rowan,” she said, feeling like in a confessional. Except that instead of a priest, she confessed to her cousin. Some people could find it weird, but this thing felt too heavy to keep to herself, and she was sure something was also bothering him.

He didn’t even look at her. He only said, “I kissed Fenrys.” Her head shot to the side, her eyes the size of flying saucers. But he kept his gaze on the wall, then kept going, “And then I told him to never speak to me again.”

“Oh,” she breathed.

Was she in the place to ask any questions? He hadn’t for her, she would allow him the same courtesy.

She thought she understood. He’d been broken once. And even if she was sure Fenrys would never hurt him the way Lysandra had… She had never thought Lysandra capable of doing what she did either. In the end, they never knew who someone really was.

Fuck, Aelin was just figuring herself out.

“We’re fucked,” she said.

“Yep,” he nodded. “We are.”

“Maybe it’s our genes,” she said. “There must be something bad about those Ashryver genes, because there’s no way so many shitty things happen to us at random.”

He snorted. “So it’s either you die, you end up being a cunt like your mother or life screws you over and over again. Wyrd help us, the eyes aren’t worth all this shit.”

And she couldn’t help it, she laughed. Loudly. Because that was true, the pretty eyes weren’t worth all that pain.

----

March 7th,

“This one, maybe?” Helia pointed out toward the ugliest dog Aelin had ever seen. Truly, she felt mean to say it, but it was the truth. She was sure this dog was very nice, but it was old. She was sure that with a little brushing it’d be prettier, but one look at its age was enough for Aelin to shake her head and grab Helia’s hand to walk away. Aelin’s heart squeezed in her chest at the idea of leaving any dog behind… If she had more money, if she didn’t live in an apartment, she would adopt them all.

But she’d already struggled to have Aedion accept to adopt one little beast, she wouldn’t push her luck.

If there was one good side of being heartbroken, it was how lonely both cousins felt. Sure, they had each other to rely on, but there was just so much physical contact she could take with that brute. She’d always wanted a dog, but her mother had always refused to adopt one. In university it would have been impossible to have a dog on campus, and now… Well, now felt like a good moment to make a permanent decision.

It was either that or a tattoo, and Helia was a little too young to get tattooed with her, so adopting a dog it was. It was her weekend with the little girl, and she really had wanted her to choose with her. It felt like a decision to make with Helia. Aedion was trailing behind them, eying the animals warily. “I don’t get why you don’t want a cat, it’s more independent.”

She rolled her eyes, “That’s the point, Aed. I want cuddles, lots of cuddles.”

“Cuddles!” Helia screamed excitedly, clapping in her hands. “I love cuddles.”

“You do?” Aelin asked, surprised. “I never would have guessed that. You never hug me.”

Helia’s eyes widened. “No! Not true!” But for good measure, the girl threw her arms around Aelin’s leg, hugging her so strongly that Aelin couldn’t move anymore. Aedion caught up to their side, chuckling at the little girl. Though it squeezed something in Aelin’s chest as she saw how much Helia had grown up in more than a year. Fuck, it’s been than a year since she met the girl. More than a year since she…

No, she wouldn’t go down that train of thought. Not now.

“We have a few dogs waiting outside if you’d like,” an employee smiled at them. They’d chosen to go to a refuge which didn’t keep dogs or cats or other animals in cages. It was sort of a house, with two dogs sharing each room. Apparently, there were activities in the garden as well. “Yes!” Helia jumped away from Aelin’s legs.

“We’d love to,” Aelin confirmed.

“I’ll show you,” the woman said.

Aelin went to grab Helia’s hand, but the little girl already had her arms in the air, her eyes pleading as she silently asked Aelin to pick her up. She was tired, Aelin should have expected that. They’d been out for a while, having grabbed an ice-cream on the way there. “Mommy?”

Aelin’s heart nearly leaped out of her chest, but she smiled at Helia and turned around, lowering so Helia could jump on her back. Aelin wasn’t strong enough to hold her in another way. When she stood, there was something strange in Aedion’s eyes. Something like worry, and maybe some hints of pity. She’d told him about her infertility. He’d been there for her when she got her eggs frozen, even if she still had chosen Fenrys as a doctor. Aedion had ignored him, much to Fenrys’ dismay. But he’d been there for her, offering her his support. It meant a lot more than he knew.

She winked at him and smiled, reassuring him. Helia still called her mommy sometimes, even if Aelin thought it would stop now that they didn’t see each other as much as they used to.

Helia had her arms wrapped around her neck and she rested her head on her shoulder, as Aelin admired how pretty that house’s garden was. She loved her apartment, it started to somewhat feel like home, but she missed running in Rowan’s garden, playing hide-and-seek with Helia.

There were indeed three dogs playing with a man, the three of them with dark fur. But the dog that caught her eyes was the little golden pup, eyeing the three other dogs as if it wished to join in the fun, without ever daring. “What about this one?” Aelin asked to the woman.

“Oh! She’s a little lost. She’s relatively new here, but she seems to be afraid of the others. It makes her integration somewhat complicated.”

The eyes of that dog… Gods, they seemed so sad. “Can we pet her?”

The woman’s face lightened. “Of course! She would love that. Usually, when people see an unsociable dog, they don’t want to get anywhere near it.”

“Assholes,” Aedion grunted from her side, and the woman nodded though she made no comments.

Carefully and instructing Helia to control how loud her voice was, they approached the dog. She was sitting near a tree, and made no attempt to move before Aelin kneeled in front of her, Helia landing on her feet. Aelin held up her hand for the dog to sniff, and after it did just that, Aelin let out a surprised yelp as the dog licked her stand, stood and nuzzled her hand away so she could nearly jump onto her.

Aelin laughed as she sat, the dog licking her face as Aelin petted her.

“She loves you,” the woman laughed, kneeling near Helia to instruct her how to pet the dog.

She wasn’t too big, that was a good point. And she seemed very affectionate. Aelin couldn’t lie and say she hadn’t developed a soft spot for the dog the moment she heard her story. “I love her, too.”

Even Aedion kneeled on the other side, and he scratched the golden pup behind her ear. He nodded at Aelin, and her smile turned big. “What do you think, Lia? Do we like her?”

Helia’s big, doe-like green eyes were shining with joy. Aelin felt complete when she saw the girl so happy, especially when it was thanks to her help. She nodded, “I love her!” She repeated what Aelin had just said. “What’s her name?”

The woman from the refuge smiled sadly. “We have no idea, we found her lost in a forest. I’ve called her willow, but we decided to let her new owner choose.”

“Any ideas?” Aelin asked Helia. Willow was a pretty name, but if the girl had a specific name in mind…

Her toothless smile was to cute not to mirror it. “Can we name her Fleetfoot?”

Alright… That was something for sure but… Aedion ruffled the girl’s hair, “Fleetfoot it is.”

---

May 4th,

Aelin’s head was pounding, or maybe it was a fist on the door. But as she opened her eyes, she quickly realized that it was both. Her vision was blurry, and yet she still stood and walked to the door. Shit, the apartment was a mess. They had partied a little too hard last night. Fenrys was asleep on the first couch, with his head resting on Aedion’s stomach, who was also laid on the couch. She didn’t remember what happened last night, but the mark on Fenrys’s neck told her that she didn’t want to know.

Aelin herself had slept against Dorian’s shoulder, the two of them sharing the second couch. Dorian spent more and more time here lately, ever since he also quit med school and broke up with his girlfriend, Manon. She didn’t really know why, just that the woman wasn’t ready for commitment.

And while they’d been breaking their backs sleeping on couches, the two couples had slept in the bedrooms. Elide and Lorcan in Aelin’s, and Connall and Vaughan in Aedion’s.

She hadn’t known they’d be there last night; she’d come home ready to cry herself to sleep, but when she opened her door… Well, that had been a good way to change her mind. And now, for two years in a row, she hadn’t been sad for her birthday. That was quite an accomplishment. Though when she remembered where she’d been a year before… She shook her head, opening the door, only for her heart to nearly stop.

Her father was standing there, holding a bouquet of flowers in his hand. With a tentative smile, he said, “Happy late birthday, princess.”

“Dad,” she breathed, suddenly feeling self-conscious about the way she was dressed. The shirt was pretty long, but still, maybe she should have put pants on. “What are you doing here?”

He looked as embarrassed as she felt, and he eyed her apartment warily. That really was the worst time for a visit. “I wanted to visit yesterday, but Aedion told me not to,” he chuckled then. “I understand why, now.”

“What are you doing here?” She repeated, still a bit confused.

“It was your birthday. I-I wanted to be there, so maybe we could spend some time together. But if you don’t want to, it’s okay.”

“No,” she rushed to say. “I’d love to.” It was nice, she thought, to see him there. To know he thought about her.

He smiled, letting out a little relieved sighed. “Good, would you like to go walk somewhere?”

“Sure,” she smiled. “Just, let me get dressed. And can I bring my dog?” Fleetfoot loved to go out and walk with Aelin. The once very small, tiny dog she’d adopted is now huge, always stealing Aedion’s bed.

“You have a--,” he stopped himself. “Sure, Aelin. Take your time.”

She gave him a small, shy smile and let him in. He looked scared at the state of her apartment, and it somehow made her smile, reminding her of all the times he came back home to a very messy house when she was a teenager. His eyebrows shot up at Aedion and Fenrys, and Aelin said, “Don’t frown at the state of your doctors, they’re not working.”

He chuckled, “I can see that.”

---

Aelin was feeling emotional and held back her tears as she walked through the park where her father used to take her and Celaena when they were kids. He used to drive all the way there just so they could throw bread at the ducks. Aelin was watching Fleetfoot run while she sat on a bench, her father next to her.

“I didn’t know you were having a party,” he said. “I mean, you didn’t have to tell me.”

“I didn’t know, either,” she told him. “Aedion surprised me.”

“I am happy that you have him,” he said, laying a hand on her knee, then squeezing. “He treats you well.”

“He really told you to not come yesterday?”

“He said that you had plans, and that you might not be up for a visit from me on that day.”

She chewed on her bottom lip. “It’s always a hard day.”

“You don’t need to explain,” he smiled. “It’s the reason why I asked Aedion beforehand, I want to do things on your terms now.”

She nodded, fighting the tears even more. They weren’t bad tears; she was just feeling a lot. The meds she’d been prescribed didn’t help, either. They helped her get out of bed every morning, but they also made her feel more sensitive. “What did you do yesterday?”

There was a flash of silver in his brown eyes, and he said, “I flew to Terrasen. I wanted to be with Celaena a little. I have… I have been doing this quite a lot lately, if I must be honest.”

“Oh,” she breathed. Her sister hadn’t been alone yesterday, then. That was good. “Does it help you?”

He nodded, “Yeah. I keep telling her how sorry I am, honestly, I just sound like a broken record there, but… I will never say it enough.” He winced, then said, “I wanted to move her. To Doranelle, so she could be with the whole family. It wasn’t my decision to leave her there, but your mother she’s been…”

“Celaena will be in Doranelle?” Aelin breathed.

Something in his face shattered. “They need the authorization of both parents, and your mother is—”

“A bitch,” she snapped, her tempter rising. “She’s just a cruel bitch.”

He didn’t say anything else other than, “I’m sorry.”

She shrugged. She’d asked him once, when she’d picked up the phone in his many attempts to call her, how the divorce was going. He said that her mother made it hard, that she was trying to take everything from him. She hadn’t lost her job at the hospital, she had no idea how, but she wasn’t at the top of the hierarchy anymore. That’s all she knew, and all she wanted to know.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Anything,” he said.

She played with her fingers as she said, “I understand how you pulled away after Celaena died. I did, too. We all grieve differently, and I’m pasted that. But… But you knew how Evalin was cruel with me. And I believe you when you say that you love me, so why have you never done anything?”

He looked away, as if he was ashamed, before he turned his eyes back on her. “I have no excuses. I hate myself for it, and I don’t deserve forgiveness. But the only explanation I can give you, was that your mother… She wasn’t only cruel to you. The few times I brought it up, she threatened to leave and take you away. And I—I don’t know. It somehow shut me up every time. Again, Aelin, this is on me. I can’t give you excuses that’d be convincing enough.”

The tears escaped her eyes then, and she didn’t wipe them off. She knew that she wouldn’t have liked the answer in anyway. But… “Thank you for being honest. You weren’t the father of the year but deserved better than Evalin. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t,” he said, voice clouded with emotions. “Don’t apologize to me, Aelin.”

“Alright,” she let out a long breath, wiping away the tears. She had to stop crying, for fuck sake.

“It’s okay,” he squeezed her knee again. “Tell me about yesterday, who was there?”

When she told him, he frowned, “No Dr. Whitethorn?”

Her stomach dropped at the name but she shook her head.

“I thought he’d be there, since you’re invol—”

“We haven’t been involved for almost a year, dad. I thought you knew that.”

“Oh,” he breathed. She hadn’t told him, but she thought someone else had. “What happened?”

Her laugh was sad. “He left me, and I’m a child about it because I can’t fucking get over it.”

“When?”

Her side-eyed look was enough for him to understand that she meant the night at her parents’ house. “Aelin,” he breathed. “He had no other choice.”

She shook her head, “You don’t get it.”

“Not everyone is me, Aelin. Not everyone is your mother.”

“Dad—”

“No,” he grabbed her hand. “Look at me.” She did. “I made him run that night. I’m so sorry, but he wanted to stay. The next day he was the one to yell at me, he had a goddamn lawyer ready, Aelin. This is why I thought you were together, because he fought for you.”

“What?” she breathed.

He’d told her. He said that he would have come back after the stalker had been dealt with; but she hadn’t been sure if she believed him. But if he truly had fought for her… Why hadn’t he said it?

She shook her head. “It’s… It’s not only that. I love him too much.”

He frowned, “What is that supposed to mean? There’s no such thing as loving too much.”

She scoffed, calling Fleetfoot so she could have some comfort from the lovely dog. She hadn’t planning on having a heart-to-heart with her father today. Hell, her head was still pounding, her body still feeling like death. The dog laid her head on Aelin, allowing her to pet her.

“There is when you’re me. I solely focus on him, so much that I start neglecting myself. I believe that if he is here then I’ll be fine, that if he is here, I’m protected and nothing can hurt me. I forgot about how you both hurt me for a while when I was with him, until that night. For a while, I just sat in my fucking car, and I realized I had nothing to go back to, dad. I was in a fight with Aedion, I kept so many secrets from my friends that they barely felt like my friends, then one of them betrayed me… I had to go to the house of a man who barely tolerate me, Dad. I just… I can’t love healthily.”

“You’re right,” he said, voice slightly quivering. “You can’t love yourself healthily. Not the others. The love you tell me about, it’s the purest kind of love that exists. It’s the kind of love I wish I’d been able to show you, that I wish I was able to show anyone. The problem isn’t with how you love Rowan,” he said, as if saying his name felt strange on his tongue. It must be. “It’s with yourself, and I know it’s my fault, but stop punishing yourself.”

She shook her head, tears spilling once more. “It’s not as easy.”

“I’m proud of you for looking for a better, healthier love. But, are you happy, princess? I understand pulling away to heal, but are you truly healing if you’re stopping yourself from being with someone you love?”

“I’m messy,” she breathed.

“You’re lovely, and pure, and too good. Start treating yourself with more love, Aelin.”

She wiped her tears away. Maybe he was right. She tried her best. She went to school, she became closer to Fenrys and Dorian and Elide, she took care of Helia… Every day, she fought to get out of bed and make the best out of a good day. But maybe… If she’d let Rowan in again, it would be easier. Maybe she couldn’t forget that night he left, but she could forgive him.

“I’ll call him tonight,” she said, and her father smile.

---

“Aelin!” A high, loud voice squealed the moment she opened the door and faster that she had any right to be, Helia threw herself at Aelin. Surprise hit her as hard as the little girl did, what was she doing here? Aelin had been drunk out of her mind yesterday, but she was positive the little girl hadn’t been there.

Fleetfoot ran into the apartment, going to sniff a very well dressed Loren. He hadn’t been there either… What was going on?

“Buttercup!” Aelin smiled, kneeling at Helias height. “What are you doing here?”

“Happy birthday!” She placed a bit, wet kiss on her cheek, and Aelin felt her heart fill with warmth. Last she heard, the two kids were having a sleepover at Rowan’s last night, and she only understood why when Vaughan and Connall showed up in her living room.

There was as if hope took over the beating of her heart. If they had been at Rowan’s then he must have driven the kids there, right? She stood, grabbing Helia and holding her close. But as she walked in the living room, there was no trace of Rowan. She tried, she really tried to not show her disappointment show, but from the other side of the room, Fenrys’s eyes on her felt heavy.

Loren rushed to Aelin as well, hugging her legs. Gods, that boy was too cute to be true. She hadn’t seen him for a year, but he was always showing up in the video calls his fathers gave her. “Happy birthday, Aelin,” he squeezed his arms around her legs. “We came to play board games!”

Aelin chuckled, her eyes looking fondly at Aedion, who mouthed happy birthday. She grinned, and then her cousin’s gaze slipped behind her, and then she realized that her father was still there. She set Helia back on her feet, and the two kids ran toward Aelin’s bedroom.

Aelin turned around, looking at her father. He looked really uncomfortable, especially pinned under Lorcan’s gaze. She had no idea what that was about. She didn’t expect Lorcan Salvaterre to take her defense out of everyone. Her father was still holding the bouquet of pink and purple flowers he’d bought her, she’d asked him to as Fleetfoot was quite a handful to deal with.

She grabbed the flowers, walking into the kitchen to fill a pot with flowers, her father on her heels. “I really like them,” she said, filling in the silence between them. The apartment was small, and everyone could hear or see them. She supposed it was a surprise for them to see him there. Maybe Aedion hadn’t told them, or her father hadn’t really warned that he’d come today.

She didn’t fail to notice that the flowers were what used to be hers and Celaena’s favorite color. Her taste had changed… but she appreciated the gesture.

“You could stay, you know,” she said.

He shook his head, giving her a little embarrassed smile. “Enjoy an afternoon with your family, it’s okay.”

In a way, she was happy that he refused. It broke her heart, how he didn’t consider himself part of her family. But maybe she was part of his, and there was still work for him to be part of hers.

He waved at her, on his way to leave, but before he could, “Dad?”

He turned around, facing her with an expression of wonder on his face. She hesitated for a second, until she decided to fuck it all. She wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging her father for the first time in year. Tears burned her eyes as she said, “Thank you for today.”

“Anytime, princess,” he breathed, hugging her back. They let go of each other after a while, and she gave him a tentative smile.

“Do you think we could do that again someday?”

He smiled at her, “I would love to, Aelin.”

---

After showing the world how much of a sore loser she was, Aelin decided to cook something for everyone before they leave, going back home. Her cooking capacities had somewhat developed, at least enough that she had made Bolognese. And since nobody was spitting what was in their plate, she supposed she hadn’t done such a bad job.

Fenrys was in a vivid tale of how his patient’s husband started hitting on him right in front of his wife, and Aelin’s belly hurt at how much she laughed. Even in her laughter, Aelin couldn’t ignore the looks Fenrys threw toward Aedion, as if making sure he was making him jealous. Compared to how cozy they were that morning, it was almost as if the two of them couldn’t seat far enough for each other. Or more like Aedion couldn’t sit far enough from Fenrys, who made it his job to taunt her cousin.

She wouldn’t even ask what happened the night before, she’d been too busy dancing with Helia and Vaughan—whose hips could move very beautifully—to look at the two of them.

Aelin was sitting with Helia on her lap. She was five now. Older than the three years old she’d met, and yet the girl still wanted to snuggle with Aelin to eat. Maybe it was a little disgusting, but they shared a plate. Less washing to do later, and it wasn’t like Helia ate a lot. She took a big mouthful of pasta, and red sauce was all around her mouth as she chewed. Aelin chuckled, using a napkin to clean her up. Her dramatic self, Helia sighed and let her body fall against Aelin’s torso. “I missed Bolognese.” She could say Bolognese without any problem now, and Aelin wanted to congratulate her on it.

“What do you mean baby, you haven’t eaten that in a while?” She remembered Rowan cooking that once a week, mainly because it was one of Helia’s and Aelin’s favorite.

“No,” the girl shook her head grabbing the big glass of water with her tiny hands.

“How so?” Maybe Rowan got sick of it. Though she couldn’t imagine him deprive Helia from her favorite food just because he didn’t like it anymore. He was… selfless that way. He loved her that much.

Fuck, she missed him.

That convo with her dad really messed her up. She had the urge to grab her phone and call him now but… she wanted peace when she made that call.

“Remelle doesn’t like it, so Daddy doesn’t cook it anymore,” Helia sighed, shrugging a little.

Aelin’s stomach dropped as she heard what Helia said. And as if everyone heard as well, all side-conversation stopped. The silence was deafening, and the two kids were oblivious to it.

“Remelle?” Aelin asked, though her voice was a little too wobbly for her liking. She looked around, and no one dared to look at her, except Aedion who was as confused as her. The only one who dared to look at her was Fenrys, and his eyes… they looked sad.

“Daddy’s friend,” Helia answered, and there was something about her tone Aelin didn’t enjoy. Maybe… dislike? “She sleeps over all the time.”

She was going to be sick. She looked around, and none of the people who lived in Doranelle dared to make eye contact. They’d known. They’d known and they didn’t tell her.

Aelin’s heart was beating too fast, her vision turned blurry and she felt dizzy. And yet, she did her smile to lean in and kiss Helia’s cheek. “You can have all the Bolognese you want here, baby.”

Aelin didn’t last more than a minute before she stood, helping Helia to seat before she went into her room. It took energy to not slam her door. Instead she sat on her bed, staring into the void.

Remelle.

She remembered now.

Dr. Flores.

Blonde, beautiful. Age appropriate.

He moved on. He moved on with her.

She was truly going to be sick. Just as she thought about rushing to the bin under her desk, her door opened. She thought Aedion would be the one to join her, but she was wrong.

Fenrys was there.

“Get out,” she breathed.

“Aelin,” he said, tentatively, closing the door behind her.

“You knew,” she said, not loudly but with bite. “You didn’t tell me.”

“You were doing good, Lin,” he said, taking a step in her direction. “I didn’t know for sure, Rowan isn’t the type to confirm or answer our questions. And you were doing better…”

“How long.” She demanded.

“Aelin.”

“How fucking long, Fenrys?” She snapped.

“We noticed them getting closer around a month ago.”

Her heart missed a beat. A month. He’d kept that from her for a month. And in the meantime, he kept convincing her to take him back. She didn’t know what her feelings were now. If she was angry or sad.

“Call him now,” he urged her. “Call him now and he will ditch her.”

“You’re a dick.”

“Call him now, Aelin. He will, just call him and he will. I know that he will today, but I’m unsure on what he would do in the future. You need to wake up now if you still want him, and we both know you do.”

“Get the fuck out of here,” she snapped.

He frowned, his head cocking to the side. “I don’t get you, Aelin. Sometimes, I can’t understand.”

“I’m trying to deal with my emotions, Fenrys, and I can’t do this if you’re here,” she hissed.

“Dealing with your emotions, is that how you call this? You’re just compartmentalizing, entirely ignoring some parts of your problems.”

“Like what?” She shouted, too lost in these waves of distress to care.

“Like the fact that he’s waited for almost a year and you’ve ignored him, but the moment he moves on it seems like a problem,” he snapped back. “You need to choose. You want him or you don’t, because Aelin, if you keep waiting you might lose him.”

Breathing was hard, and it was as it an entire building crumbled onto her as she breathed, “He told me he couldn’t wait anymore. I told him I wouldn’t come back.” Her friend’s face turned sympathetic, and her voice broke as she breathed, “I didn’t believe him. I-I hoped.”

“Call him,” Fenrys said, holding out his phone. “Call him, and tell him.”

She looked at the phone for a second, wondering what would happen. Could she call him, really? Would she call him, ask him to ruin the little happiness he’s found, only so she can bring her mess back into his life?

Then, she shook her head. “I’d like you to leave.”

“Aelin,” he breathed.

She shook her head, “I don’t want to speak to you anymore.” He’d known. He should have told her, no matter how much he wanted to protect her. She was so, so tired of being protected. Of being weak.

He laughed, but the sound was sour. “You want to push me away from your life, too? When will it stop Aelin, when only Aedion’s left, huh?”

She looked away. She didn’t deserve his friendship, didn’t deserve his time. She wasn’t a good person. Wasn’t good for anyone. He shouldn’t have had to protect her.

“You think I don’t know why? You rely on Aedion because he’s as lonely as you. He won’t leave you, and you won’t leave him. You’re using each other as life buoys, and you push away anyone else. You can’t ignore the world outside.”

“Leave,” she said, voice firm. “I don’t want to see anyone,” she slipped under her blanket and didn’t come out of it for an entire weekend.

---

June 10th,

“I had fun, you know,” he said in her ear, helping her put her coat back on. She gave him a shy, timid smile.

“It was a nice evening,” she nodded, taking a deep breath as they stepped out of the restaurant. Even for a month of June, the air was quite cold. Hence, the coat. She usually disliked wearing one, it always ruined an outfit. She rather not get sick, though. So, she put on a goddamn coat.

“Can I walk you back to your car?” He asked.

He was cute. Pretty, even. She’d met him in class, and he’d been the first person to approach her. She’d been wary at first… The last time she befriended someone in class, it hadn’t ended well. For months he did his best to befriend her, and while she didn’t reject him, she wasn’t exactly warm. Then, before Yulemas, he’d asked her on a date. She refused. He did it again a few months later, and she gave him the same excuse. I’m not ready.

He was perfectly content to keep their friendship intact. Until a month ago. She called him, asking if he was still up for a date. She’d never heard Sam’s voice so joyful. He was funny, and a good man.

Now, three dates later, Aelin enjoyed his company. She didn’t love it, and she didn’t crave it so much that she felt as if she needed him. But maybe this was a more realistic kind of relationship for someone as messed up as Aelin.

The walk to her car hadn’t been long, and they stood there. “You look beautiful,” he praised her, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear.

“Thank you,” she smiled, waiting for a blush to spread in her cheeks but it didn’t happen.

He was standing close to her, and his gaze lowered on her lips. He wetted his own, taking a deep breath, and she knew what he would ask before he even opened his mouth.

“Can I kiss you?”

For someone who had had sex in a bathroom before the first date, and who had grinded on a guy during their first date, it was strangely chaste of her to never having kissed Sam before. Not a single time before or after their first two dates, but she knew she would break this circle today. After all, she had to move on.

She took a deep breath of her own and nodded, and the next second his wet lips were on hers. And she felt… nothing. It would come, she told herself. She rose on her toes, parting her lips for him.

He groaned, pushing her against her car. His hands stayed in appropriate places, on her waist, but she could feel things heat up.

This wasn’t…

She didn’t want to have sex with him. Didn’t want to kiss him. Not now. Was he kissing her? Having sex with her? If he didn’t… Didn’t she have to, as well? She had to move on as well, she had to prove to herself that—

She pushed Sam away, a little breathless. “I’m sorry.”

“Have I hurt you?” He asked, pulling back, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He really liked her and she… She didn’t. It wasn’t fair.

“I don’t think it’s going to—” She was cut off by her phone ring. Great. Amazing. She was trying to communicate, goddamn it. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he said as she grabbed her phone from her handbag, frowning at the name showing up.

Fenrys.

They hadn’t been in contact for almost a month. Well, he did try to call. She was the one dodging his calls. Not every good behavior for the new Aelin, but she didn’t care. She was ashamed, and sad, and mad.

She didn’t want to speak to him now. She hung up, and turned her eyes back on Sam. “Sorry, just a friend.” She winced. “I was saying, you’re great and I—”

Her phone rang again, and Fenrys’ name showed up again. Alright, that wasn’t normal. Usually, he called once. If he really was in a mood, he sent her a selfie of his puppy face. But he never called twice in a row. Two calls in a row were reserved for bad news only; she’d heard enough of those to know.

The last time, she’d answered one of Fenrys’ call late at night, Rowan had cut his hand. This couldn’t be worse than that. She was sure of it. For all she knew, it wasn’t bad. Her bad days were over.

“You can answer,” Sam said, voice kind. “You look anxious.”

She winced again. “I’m sorry, I’ll cut this short, I promise.”

He smiled, unbothered. Fuck, she hated what she was about to tell him. He didn’t deserve that.

She took a few steps away from Sam, answering her phone. “What do you want?”

“Aelin,” he breathed, and her spine straightened. He sounded like he was… crying. “It’s Helia, she’s hurt,” he broke down then, crying on the phone. “We don’t know what’s going to happen.”

It was as if Aelin’s world came crashing down. She had flashes. Flashes of her aunt’s dead body in her casket. Flashes of Celaena in that red water. No.

Not again.

Please, she thought as tears spilled down her cheeks. Please, not again.

She couldn’t say anything. Couldn’t breathe anymore. She barely felt Sam’s hands on her shoulder, barely felt him take the phone from her before she threw up on the street, begging the Gods she’d stopped to believe in so long ago.

••••••

@sheharahu // @morganofthewildfire // @thestoriesyoutell // @fromthelibraryofemilyj // @swankii-art-teacher // @itsforeverinnocent-blog // @becarefuloflove // @imnotsogoodatthis // @rowaelinismyotp // @a-court-of-milkandhoney // @feysand-loml // @elentiyawhitethorn // @live-the-fangirl-life // @story-scribbler // @loves-books // @fangirlprincess09 // @theysayitscrazy // @danibutterr // @endlessdaydream // @thegreyj // @gracie-rosee // @acreativelydifferentlove // @cretaceous-therapod // @louphantomdragon // @mis-lil-red // @backtobl4ck // @whoever-you-choose-to-love // @lemonade-coolattas // @mad-madeline-ace // @the-introverted-bibliophile // @leiawritesstories // @emilyoftheshadows // @anniesbookshelf // @rainbowcheetah512 // @astra-ad-mare // @story-scribbler // @superspiritfestival // @wordsafterhours // @rowaelinrambling // @black-daisy-water // @fireheart-violet // @livsdriverslicense // @charlizeed // @ladykreads // @mariamuses // @autumnbabylon // @justreadertings // @highqueenofelfhame // @earthtolinds // @bowdawn // @psychopath-at-heart // @ginnyweasley06 // @cookiemonsterwholovesbooks

#rowaelin #rowan whitethorn #rowaelin fanfiction #rowan x aelin #throne of glass fanfiction #aelin galathynius #illicit affairs #throne of glass #rowan and aelin

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anakin-pilled · 1 year ago

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ITS ONLY 11 AM AND IM SCREAMING ALREADY..i know you said this chapter wouldn't be as angsty and i told you i would still find a way to cry,,,,WELL BABY I CRIED!!!! THIS IS MY BREAD AND BUTTER!!! i don't even need to elaborate on why i love cruel summer so much, you already know hahahahah. i am so excited i mean terrified to read this new series!!! like i can't wait to see vol's growth and how her and neteyam's reunion and how they will both deal with the aftermath of their love ):

okay this is me writing this after i finished: i am stunned. i have many words but no words at the same time. i love this, and i love you and this was amazing and i need everyone to hop on the neteyam vol train RIGHT NOW i am.///woww. gonna spend the rest of my day thinking about them now ):

He tried to ignore how his heart was in his throat, and the layer of sweat that accompanied the anxiety that has settled in his chest weeks ago...

THIS IS HOW I FEEL READING THIS!!!!

It hurt that there he was, having to go back, back to everything he left behind… to everyone he left behind, to witness the life he could have had, a life that felt like a fever dream sometimes, especially now, with the pregnant mate he just kissed goodbye a few hours ago.

IM SOBBING AND THROWING UP OH MY GOD I CANT HANDLE THIS ANDRA IM SO SAD....what do you MEAN he had sex with someone else **faints*** LMFOAAO i already knew this but its still gonna make me sad every time ): hnmmmm i thought neteyam's mate would come with him to the forest, but for now, im highkey glad shes not going with him because that would make the situation EVER WORSE AND MORE HEARTBREAKING!!!

Your touch still lingered on his skin, marking it like the tattoos that now adorned his arm and thighs, except the memory of you and your fingers tracing the freckles on his skin hurt more than any tattoo ever could.

now why would you say this????? putting a knife through my heart would hurt LESS. like i understand why it would be so hard for neteyam to stop himself from loving vol because they clearly had such an intense bond and love and their relationship ended because other forces stronger than them made it end, but not because THEY wanted it to end. like sure time passes and all wounds scar but literally like IT WOULD HAVE BEEN FUN IF YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONE.

“I don’t know. I hope she did.” I hope she didn’t.

“Do you?”

“…No.”

KENDRA FOUND DEAD IN A DITCH!!!!!!

In those months passed, Neteyam learnt to accept that much like he’s come to know in his life, and especially after you, some things just are not meant to be.

AND I FUCKING HATE IT!!!! I WANT THEM TOGETHER!!! but its just so true, things are not meant to be sometimes and we just have to deal with the fact and move on.

He believed in Eywa, and trusted her judgement and her will, and Eywa chose this for him.

IM SICK IM SICK IM SICK!!!! IM FUCKING SICK!!!! the parallel between Eywa giving Kiri and Spider a second chance at love versus Neteyam and Vol not getting that ): and like I mentioned in my original annotations of Ocean and Engines, its the fucking FINALITY of it all. The Na'vi mate for life so there really is no going back on that bond that Neteyam has with his mate, there is no chance for Neteyam and Vol EVER.

...the little baby that would make Neteyam the happiest man in the world once they were born.

FUCK THAT BABY!!!!! the intrusive thoughts are winning im so sorry i cant even pretend to be unbiased BECAUSE I WANT THEM TOGETHER SO BAD BUT ITS NOT GONNA HAPPEN gdrghdrigeikdghirhig i am in pain

After finding out about you and Neteyam’s relationship, he has kept the updates about the Sully’s lives to as much as he felt you needed to know, and you were grateful.

NO because that's great and really hellpful for Vol's own mental health ): like bub needs to move on and she can't do it if she is always hearing about Neteyam's new life. she went from being with him everyday, knowing ever facet of his life, to only knowing bits and pieces ffnjrjngrngrnk

It’s not like you didn’t expect it to happen at some point, and yet, expectations meant nothing when your mind still tried to cling on to every single ounce of delusion it could in order to survive.

BABY IM CRYING!!!!!!! AGAIN!!!!! like how do you even process the fact the love of your life is going to become a father to a child that isn't your own? THERES NO GOING BACK FROM A KID. neteyam and vol literally said they didn't know where one person ended and the other began but now there's going to be a tiny little baby that isn't theirs and its so clear there is line drawn between them now

Because in reality, you had a different life - a good life, a life you couldn’t really complain about, one in which you had an Avatar and friends and loved ones, in which you could finally breathe the air that poisoned you for the majority of your life, one in which you were about to become one of the people, the way you’ve always wanted

THIS IS SO IMPORTANT!!!! like don't get me wrong, i want them together so bad. and as a reader IM the one crying because i want them together and the whole situation is just heartbreaking. but its consoling to know that despite that, vol is doing good for herself and she has a life that she has always wanted. and that's what really matters, right? like everyone wants to be loved and love, but i think in Vol's case, there are matter's more important than love--like truly being part of a community and culture and having a purpose in life. and duhhh she is going to be sad about Neteyam and she isn't going to be 100% healed, but it gives me some comfort to know that not everything that has happened was in vain because she is becoming part of The People.

Did you want it, all of it, any of it? A family, a mate? Did you want to feel love again, could any love feel the same way, as poignant or powerful or earth-shattering as the one you had?

One thing I thought about after you announced the cruel summer sequel is, what's going to happen to Vol? Does she ever find someone else to love again, will she allow herself to love again? How does her future play out and is it a future she's happy with? I definitely inserted some of my own personal feelings whenever i thought about it, I thought omg no i'd be screaming crying throwing up and afraid to love anyone ever again that's exactly how Vol should be!!!! but like..that's not realistic. Some people really do fall in love with one person for the rest of their lives and spend the rest of their life settling for other people, but i don't think that will be the case with Vol. A part of her will always love Neteyam, but I think she would grow enough as a person to allow herself to love and be loved again.

Okay i actually wanted to go into that deeper but I'll save that for another time hahahha

...you were jealous of the shades of grey that always plagued you, making everything a lot more complicated than it ever needed to be.

......why is this so me lol

That simple. Now that they're coming back, and he has an Avatar, and he will soon be one of the people, life is once more simple in his eyes - all he has to do is just... go for it.

FNESKJGNRBGKJSEBRKGNOBGD UGH WHY DO I LOVE THIS??? IM ROOTING FOR KIRI AND SPIDER I NEED AT LEAST ONE HAPPY COUPLE DAMN!!!! but also once again i love the contrast

...it was sad, beautiful and tragic.

*sobs vehemently** listen i could actually be crazy and listen to the saddest songs neteyam/vol coded songs right now but i am not...mainly because i will send myself into an emotional breakdown if i do HAHAHAHA

And then all you could do is watch as it was cruelly plucked away from your grasp, before you even had a chance to hold it tightly against your chest, before needing to let it go... forever.

Like...can you even consider them the right person, wrong time trope?? because they never even had the time and they never will oop

It was a blessing. A miracle. Your nightmare. And one you'd have to face again, in a matter of hours.

THE DIFFERENCE IN THOUGHT PATTERNS IS SO TELLING OF HOW NA'VI AND HUMAN MINDS WORK!!! babe i wish i could send you a million audio messages with all my thoughts because tumblr is NOT enough

He was never yours to lose.

IN THE MONTH OF THE AUGUST YOU DARE WRITE THIS ??? YOU ARE SO CRUEL!!!!! 😭😭 *but in reality im eating this out of the palm of your hand*

It was also surreal to think that you could have had this your whole life, and yet you didn't.

THIS??????? wow...i have thoughts. i am so happy for her and spider, but i cant help but be angry at jake and neytiri now. ITS MORE COMPLICATED THAN THAT I GET IT!!! but they were also just babies on a foreign planet and they could've been treated with more dignity and just imagine how neteyam and vol could have turned out if only they were accepted ): PERSIST AND RESIST THE TEMPTATION TO ASK IF ONE HAD BEEN DIFFERENT, WOULD EVERYTHING BE DIFFERENT!!!!!

"Oel Ngati Kameie, ma Olo'eyktan!"

"Agh, I told you not to call me that. It's just Tarsem."

OHHHHHHHH......👀👀👀

i am not going to get a head of myself....i don't know if tarsem will be a potential love interest or just a really great friend BUT i would 100% be okay with vol and him ended up together because my girl deserves love and a happy ending as well. NOT THAT LOVE IS THE HAPPY ENDING, but in vol's case, it would be happy because she can love someone without anything holding her because she finally is one of the People and has a Na'vi body.

if you were going to come face to face with the family you once thought was your forever home, and the man you once couldn't imagine existing without.

*SOBBING CRYING AGAIN* I FEEL LIKE IM GETTING A VISCERAL REACTION RIGHT NOW LIKE MY TUMMY IS ACTUALLY IN KNOTS SO I CANT IMAGINE HOW VOL FEELS I WOULD ACTUALLY FAINT ON THE SPOT

...you realised you didn’t really want to die anymore, and the pain of his soul spilling all around you like endless rays of sunlight and all he meant to you had dulled slightly in time, but still, nothing changed, you realise sadly.

geez what a painful fucking reality like it really does suck? god the feeling of thinking you're moved on, or at least slightly moved on, and then something or someone reminds you of the past and its like all your stitching has come undone and it feels so fucking hopeless and bleak and its just like when will it end ?? why does it have to be like this?? and you're helpless because you really cant do anything about it except let time heal the wound, even if takes a really long fucking time

“It’s good to see you... Vol.”

💣💣 THE BOMBS ARE GOING OFF IN MY MIND !!!!

...you felt a whole year of progress slowly being undone, but unlike before, you knew how to put yourself back together again... you were forced to learn in time, and you were grateful for it now.

NO BC I TRULY TRULY LOVE THIS FOR VOL I LOVE HER SM AND I WANT TO HOLD HER HAND BECAUSE SHE IS SO STRONG AND I AM SO PROUD OF HER!!! SHE IS A NEW WOMAN AND THIS IS A HALLMARK OF HER GROWTH!!! its such a powerful thing to be able to pull yourself back together, like not everyone has that ability, but i am so happy she does ): IF YOU NEVER BLEED YOU'RE NEVER GONNA GROW

...how you were the perfect height for the perfect hug, how your face almost moulded into his chest like the missing piece of the puzzle you’ve both tried to solve all your life, but will now never be able to.

im drinking an ice coffee with as i read and and im sure that i have had my tears fall into the cup because i am just sobbing at every other paragraph HELPPPPPPPP i love the way you write so much like how the fyck do you even come up with this?!?! you are an evil genius

It hurt, right now, looking at Kiri and Spider, at the unspoken conversation they were having without a single word, that felt so intimate, it almost felt wrong for you to be able to witness it. You had that too, once. You wondered if anyone would ever look at you the same, ever again.

ITS GONNA HURT SO BAD WHEN YOU ACTUALLY DIVE INTO SPIDER AND KIRI'S REKINDLING like it already hurts BUT ITS GONNA HURT EVEN MORE i want vol t o know that someone WILL look at her like that one day ):

He was sad, so sad, that he knew nothing about your life anymore, except for the small snippets he overheard or the few pieces of information he sought out in the few moments, far and few in between, when his heart didn't feel like it was crushed under the weight of your momentous memory, that was still too heavy to lift proudly, with a head held high.

SO I WATCH YOUR LIFE IN PICTURES LIKE I USED TO WATCH YOU SLEEP

So many things have changed, monumental and forever-altering, and yet, somehow, he didn't think this ever will.

i am 100% convinced that the bond between them could never change, like there is no way it could ever change, not when they were something so great and unique and rare ???

"They are, but he doesn't have eyes for any of them. In fact, there's only one person he sees, and it's obvious to everyone but her."

Neteyam followed his grandmother's gaze and felt his breath hitch in his throat at who it landed on.

AHHHHHHHHHH THIS IS GETTING JUICY!!!! I LOVE IT WHAT THE GFUVOIEJFOGNOG I AM SCREAMING BABY AHHHHHHHH

okay here are some are pictures that accurately describe how i looked the entire time while reading this chapter I have left over mascara under my eyes from last night and my tears made it worse so now I have even more mascara smudged under my eyes

𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝟙 | ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕀: 𝔹𝕖𝕖𝕟 𝕊𝕒𝕪𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕐𝕖𝕤 𝕀𝕟𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕒𝕕 𝕠𝕗 ℕ𝕠

pairing: Neteyam x f!Human/Avatar Reader

warnings: angst, tragic love trope, the one that got away trope, some fluff, all the feels

wc: 5k words

a/n: surprise??? today's actually the 3 months anniversary of cruel summer being finished, so i thought, what better occasion to drop the sequel than this?? i hope you enjoy besties, i'm so happy to write for neteyam and vol again, they own my whole heart now and always. i'm not sure if people who were tagged in cruel summer want to be tagged for this, so i'm only tagging the people that specifically asked for this series x

to clarify: this series will be following oceans and engines mostly, but both endings will make and appearance and play a part in this story x smooches x

♥ series masterlist ♥ cruel summer ♥ series playlist ♥ masterlist

“I can’t believe you’re mine. And I’m yours, Vol. I’m yours, I’ve always been yours. I’ll always be yours.”

I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit Been saying "yes" instead of "no" I thought I saw you at the bus stop, I didn't though

“Is everyone ready?” Neteyam was violently pulled out of a memory that he couldn’t shake, that still haunts him every night, watching as his father fretted in their once-shared marui, that he hasn’t spent that much time in recently. He sighed as he looked outside and saw his beautiful ikran that he has neglected in the past year, that was now waiting dutifully for him to bond with her so they can leave, that was another bitter reminder of a life so far removed, it didn’t feel like his own anymore.

He missed Seze, and the feeling of freedom that was so exhilarating, it felt almost wrong for a mere mortal to be able to feel, the feeling that only came with flying far away from the ground, from his problems and worries, from his responsibilities and all the sacrifices they entitled. He tried to ignore how his heart was in his throat, and the layer of sweat that accompanied the anxiety that has settled in his chest weeks ago, as soon as his father announced that they were to temporarily return to the forest, to be there for a special number of ceremonies. Norm and Max let him know that, after a few months of rigorous training, the both of them, as well as Spider... and you... were ready to take your Iknimaya and Uniltaron and become part of the Omaticaya.

It hurt, just like everything about it did, how life moved on despite it all, that it went on and on, and everything changed. It hurt that there he was, having to go back, back to everything he left behind… to everyone he left behind, to witness the life he could have had, a life that felt like a fever dream sometimes, especially now, with the pregnant mate he just kissed goodbye a few hours ago.

Neteyam’s stopped himself thinking about you for so long, it’s become second nature, to push the intrusive thoughts aside, to rummage through his increasingly deteriorating will in order to not allow his mind to bring the images of you in the front of his eyes like a movie on a screen, showing him every moment you shared, culminating in that last day, that still managed to somehow knock the breath out of him and make him dizzy and disoriented. Your touch still lingered on his skin, marking it like the tattoos that now adorned his arm and thighs, except the memory of you and your fingers tracing the freckles on his skin hurt more than any tattoo ever could. Neteyam excelled at everything he did, and so he never thought about you. Except today, when you were all he could think about, when the thought that he would be there to witness your Iknimaya, your consciousness transfer, when the talk he had with Kiri was the catalyst for it and was now ringing in his head, like unceasing echoes.

“Do you think they’ve moved on?” Kiri, much like her brother, shared so much with a human, so much more than could ever be said out loud or expressed into words, only to have it taken from her as she moved to Awa’atlu. Unlike Neteyam, though, Kiri wasn't willing to throw in the towel just yet, stubborn as she always was, especially now that the person she loved got an Avatar, now that he was working towards becoming Omaticaya, now that there seems like a second chance was bestowed on them by the grace of Eywa herself. Neteyam has always admired Kiri, and her joie-de-vivre, her ability to always speak her mind and do whatever she felt was right without infringing on their parents' rules, but also without sacrificing her own happiness, and her overall ability to thread the middle line between her two brothers, which were the two extremes of the same spectrum.

“Do I think who has moved on?” Neteyam knew very well who Kiri was referring to, but half-hoped if he acted oblivious she would just drop it. He should know his sister better than that.

“Stop. You know very well who.”

A sigh so deep it felt like it was exhaled from the pits of Neteyam’s soul escaped him, and he had to think about his answer, something he didn’t want to have to do.

“I don’t know. I hope she did.” I hope she didn’t.

“Do you?”

“…No.”

“Doesn’t it kill you? Knowing they have Avatars now? Because it kills me. it kills me to know I could have had all this time with him, if only I just waited, or fought harder. If only I tried a little more. If only I just went to mum and dad and just told them the truth. But maybe this means something, the timing. Maybe it means we had to leave and learn and see the world, to know that no matter what, for us, it will always be them. For me, it will always be him. Maybe this was the second chance at love I never even knew I could ever have.”

The news of your new Avatars reached Awa’atlu months ago, while Neteyam was having dinner with his now extended family, including his father and mother in law, as well as his mate, and for the first time since the night after you left, Neteyam needed to excuse himself and leave, taking his ikran and flying away, flying for hours, coming so close to just leaving it all behind, just so he could at least catch one glimpse of you again, just so he could hug you and tell you how happy he is for you, how much he hopes this Avatar can finally give you the life you’ve always wanted, the life you were always meant for, so he could watch the tears gather in your eyes and drop down your face and know that that very image would be enough to confess harsher truths that he should never think to say out loud again, like how he’s still in love with you and always will be, how nobody would ever be able to replace you, how he wishes every day things would be different.

In those months passed, Neteyam learnt to accept that much like he’s come to know in his life, and especially after you, some things just are not meant to be. That no matter how much love there is, how much desire to make it work, some things are beyond control, beyond any fight he still had in him. He believed in Eywa, and trusted her judgement and her will, and Eywa chose this for him. And he was happy, as happy as he could be, with his current life, with a mate that was strong, and intelligent, and kind and sweet, and incredibly beautiful, and the little baby that she was currently carrying in her womb, the little baby that would make Neteyam the happiest man in the world once they were born. Some things just weren’t meant to be. And your life together, the one you’ve left behind, the one he’s left behind, was one of those things.

“Stop. I have a life now, Kiri. A different life. I have a mate. I can’t think about things like this anymore.”

Kiri puffed and rolled her eyes, before getting up from her spot on the floor and leaving, but not before she said one last thing.

“Just because you can’t think about it, doesn’t mean you don’t.”

Neteyam couldn’t argue with his sister anymore, not when she was right, not when regardless how much his sheer force of will denied him visions of you, memories of you, at his most vulnerable, in his dreams, your smile was all he saw, your transcendent alien beauty his own personal sun, his own personal guide post and his light all in one. He couldn't deny you when, still to this day, the reminder of your eyes that shone like stars in the night sky, that were the mirror to your soul he could drown in and be thankful for the chance to be overcome in you and in the love that he used to know so intimately, in the laugh that still echoes in his ears, in the strength that informed his, in everything you were that he didn’t have anymore that still held power over him, was still able to empty his brain of every other thought that wasn't this, and wasn't you.

I hit the ground running each night I hit the Sunday matinée You know the greatest films of all time were never made

“Kid… are you ok?”

A hand on your shoulder pulled you out of your focused rumination, a state you found yourself in more and more these last few days, as the mostly exciting and somewhat dreaded arrival of the Sullys approached, a state that culminated today, as you were only a few hours away from seeing them again, from seeing him again. Your head snapped to the man who talked to you, a man who sympathised with your pain more than anyone else. Norm tried his best. After finding out about you and Neteyam’s relationship, he has kept the updates about the Sully’s lives to as much as he felt you needed to know, and you were grateful.

Still, you couldn’t help hear some things, huge things, monumental things, things that shifted your world on its axis and emptied whatever was left of the contents of your ribcage. It’s not like you didn’t expect it to happen at some point, and yet, expectations meant nothing when your mind still tried to cling on to every single ounce of delusion it could in order to survive. In your mind, you were still 18 and Neteyam was still your best friend and the dreams that plagued you every night, of an alternate reality you couldn’t help but still yearn for, one in which he was still yours and you were still his, one in which he never let you go and you were overwhelmingly happy and sickeningly in love, didn’t stop when you woke.

But that’s all they were, just dreams. Because in reality, you had a different life - a good life, a life you couldn’t really complain about, one in which you had an Avatar and friends and loved ones, in which you could finally breathe the air that poisoned you for the majority of your life, one in which you were about to become one of the people, the way you’ve always wanted… one in which Neteyam’s mate was pregnant with his child, one in which every last delusion you had came crashing down into the ground, forcing you to leave the past behind once more and wake up to the world surrounding you, that despite his absence, hasn’t stop moving on and along.

In the few months since you found out, you tried… you really tried, every day of your life, to take a page from the book of the rest of the world, and move on. You focused on training and on yourself, you threw the necklace Neteyam gave you that meant so much to you once, you put all the stuff that reminded you of him in a designated box that you never touched, that lay safe from sight beneath your desk, correctly labeled so as to not mistakenly pick it up and rummage through it.

You spent most of your days in your new Avatar body, testing the limits to which it can be pushed, working harder than you ever had to belong, to learn, to see, to leave your human self behind and embrace this body which will soon, with Eywa's will, be your only one. Having this body came with a lot of advantages, too many to count, one of which you never really considered, but now were trying to embrace: dating. Being openly courted, and wanted, the possibility of spending your whole life with one person, that chooses you every day, the possibility of mating, of experiencing tsaheylu with someone else, of having a family, it was all new to you... all new and overwhelming and bittersweet. You've never allowed yourself to think about the future before, because you knew it would only lead to heartbreak. What was the point, when the only man you've ever loved was out of your reach, when your body wasn't made for this world, where the possibility of bringing a tiny human to life only to watch them suffer the same fate of struggling between two lives, neither of which you truly belonged in, terrified you.

But now, you had to think about it. You needed to think about it. Did you want it, all of it, any of it? A family, a mate? Did you want to feel love again, could any love feel the same way, as poignant or powerful or earth-shattering as the one you had? Could anyone's touch or smile or laugh, anyone's eyes or hands or tahni, anyone's voice or embrace or beauty ever elicit the same emotions in you? You wondered if they did for him, and his new mate. You wondered if he moved on after all. You hoped he did.

You hoped he didn't.

You watched as Spider gobbled down the food that was placed in front of him, with enough ferocity to really buy into a notion that he has, indeed, never seen food before in his life. You rolled your eyes as you pushed a paper napkin on his tray, laughing at the way he hurried to brush the stray crumbs off his mouth with the back of his hand instead. Spider was very excited about today. You couldn't help admire this boy you grew up with, that you had to watch turn into a man and mighty warrior, and the simplistic way he approached life. Life was black and white to him, and more and more, you were jealous of the shades of grey that always plagued you, making everything a lot more complicated than it ever needed to be.

To him, life was simple: when him and Kiri were together, they were together and it was love, and it was all he needed. When they left, he realised immediately that it was outside of their control and that there was no other way, and understood them and moved on. That simple. Now that they're coming back, and he has an Avatar, and he will soon be one of the people, life is once more simple in his eyes - all he has to do is just... go for it. And he will. And you knew there was enough stubbornness and impulsiveness in Kiri that she would drop everything and join him.

Life had never been simple in your eyes. Your relationship with Neteyam... never simple. It was wondrous, and magical and unique... and it was sad, beautiful and tragic. When he left the first time, when they left, they took everything with them. When you went to Awa'atlu, and he confessed, he gave everything back and more. And then all you could do is watch as it was cruelly plucked away from your grasp, before you even had a chance to hold it tightly against your chest, before needing to let it go... forever.

Life was never simple in his, either. There was so much, too much to do, to achieve... so much to strive for, so much to make up for... so much to sacrifice. And it didn't matter. The love didn't matter, because there were bigger worries and bigger responsibilities. And in the end... maybe he found it was for the best. He might have had to give up being Olo'eyktan of the Omaticaya, but Eywa rewarded his new life within the Metkayina with the privilege of leading a new tribe. Of being the father of the next Olo'eyktan, the first child born of a forest Na'vi and a reef Na'vi. It was a blessing. A miracle. Your nightmare. And one you'd have to face again, in a matter of hours.

It was strange, going through the village, seeing the grandiose garlands, fires and displays that were being put forward for the arrival of the Sullys. You weren't surprised, not at all, although it was easy to forget sometimes, when you remember the warmth and tight family unit, the intimate moments being buried in Neteyam's chest as he purred lightly as he drifted off, how in those moments, he wasn't the prodigy of the Omaticaya, nor the son of the greatest warriors on Pandora, but just Neteyam, your best friend, your confidant, your everything.

He was never yours to lose.

I guess you never know, never know And if you wanted me, you really should've showed

"Ma Tawtute!"

The voice of Tarsem cut through all the commotion and perked your ears up, your newfound heightened senses still something you were getting used to slowly. You smiled at the sight of his smile, always wide and sincere when it looked at you. You were grateful for Tarsem. He somehow did for you and Spider what neither Jake, Neytiri or Mo'at ever did. He made you part of the people. Even before you got an Avatar. He showed you that the human proverb was indeed true - where there's a will, there's a way, and much to your infinite sorrow over the matter, more and more it seemed the Sullys had very little of either, when it came to the two human children abandoned here after the war.

But he did. Tarsem did. He took you both in, and trained you and allowed you to know a real family, a real sense of community. It was a bit surreal how quickly the other adapted after seeing how their new leader behaved. It was also surreal to think that you could have had this your whole life, and yet you didn't.

"Oel Ngati Kameie, ma Olo'eyktan!"

"Agh, I told you not to call me that. It's just Tarsem."

You watched carefully how his tail undulated wildly behind him, knocking into his thighs haphazardly. You were still trying to understand your own tail and decode the few patters you have noticed in others. Erratic tail meant excited... it meant happy. Was he happy to see you? Was the purple twinge in his cheeks just the result of the busy schedule he was forced to undertake in the past few weeks, the unrelenting duties of the chieftan that tired him? It had to be, because there's no way that-

A loud cacophony of war cries interrupted the moment, and right now, for just a second, you were almost glad. Only for a second, only until you remembered what the yells meant, and as you did, so did your mind start racing and your heart gallop in your chest, and you were glad, as you have been for a while, for the fact you no longer required a mask to breathe, because it would have been fogged blind by now, and you needed your senses - you needed to be acutely aware of your surroundings, of your own body, if you were going to come face to face with the family you once thought was your forever home, and the man you once couldn't imagine existing without.

You recognised their ikran immediately, the incandescent beauty and unmistakable colour patterns hard to forget, even if you didn't spend nights dreaming about them. Seze was last to land, and as soon as she did and he dismounted, you saw his gaze scanning the crowd awaiting him.

Your eyes meet and in a second, a sea of memories flooded your mind, flashing before your eyes like the stereoscope Norm and Max gave you on your last birthday. A thousand images, some that made you want to smile, others that made you want to wail in agony, all that tugged sharply at the string of your heart until it reminded you of all the loose stitches keeping it together.

As he approached, his eyes never leaving yours, you saw in them the same emotions you were going through, and it was easier than you thought it would be, being in his presence, and you realised you didn’t really want to die anymore, and the pain of his soul spilling all around you like endless rays of sunlight and all he meant to you had dulled slightly in time, but still, nothing changed, you realise sadly. Despite all the changes in his appearance, he was still Neteyam, still the man you loved and would always love, still not yours anymore.

“You’re a lot… taller than I remember.” his smile was soft and tentative, and you were grateful that he talked first, so that you didn't have to. He's always known you, down to the darkest corners of your being, and while it was a hard pill to swallow now, you appreciated it in the moment, his intrinsic ability to know exactly what to do or say, in order to get you to relax.

“And you’re a lot shorter than I remember.” you laugh and just like that, the tension dissipates slightly.

“It’s good to see you... Vol.”

Vol… the nickname electrified your every nerve, and you felt a whole year of progress slowly being undone, but unlike before, you knew how to put yourself back together again... you were forced to learn in time, and you were grateful for it now.

You smiled a little, and you took him in, all the changes a year brought forth that you weren’t there to witness. He was leaner, all the swimming streamlining his body a lot more than being in the forest ever did. He had a big, intricate tattoo on his left arm, and one on his lower abdomen. His signature braids were gone, replaced by half braids that opened up into soft curls. He was handsome, so handsome, but you missed his braids, and his more muscular appearance. He looked a lot less Omaticaya now, which you knew he would, but it still filled you with a sense of sorrow, the departure from his roots, from his true home… from you.

“It’s good to see you too, Teyam. Seems like the reef agrees with you.”

You let out a big exhale as he covered the ground between you and enveloped you in a hug, his head finding the crook of your neck, and you found tears haunting you at how well your new body fit in his, how you were the perfect height for the perfect hug, how your face almost moulded into his chest like the missing piece of the puzzle you’ve both tried to solve all your life, but will now never be able to. How unfair the universe, you found yourself asking again, to give you this avatar just a few weeks too late to matter, to change anything.

You tightened your arms around him and you stood there, in the silence, just listening to his breath and your own, and trying to ignore the small drops falling down your back. They weren’t tears, you told yourself. Not his tears. And neither were the droplets falling down your face.. Not tears. Not your tears.

Before either of you could say anything else, a sea of people, all who knew and loved Neteyam, all who wanted to greet him and talk to him and be around him, pulled you away from him and gave you a chance to greet your lost siblings. Lo'ak was taller, so much taller, and you were amazed to see his progress, not just physical, but mental - too. He looked confident, and happy. He looked like he found his home, his purpose, his people. Kiri, on the other hand, had eyes for no one other than one person, who, in time became the embodiment of this tribe you both loved so much - strong, valiant, forged in fire. Spider was as much Omaticaya as the people born here, and soon, he will be born again, a true man of the tribe, and gain his place amongst the Na'vi forever.

There were moments, infrequent and far apart these days, when you craved the intimacy: to be loved, to be revered, to be cherished once more. It hurt, right now, looking at Kiri and Spider, at the unspoken conversation they were having without a single word, that felt so intimate, it almost felt wrong for you to be able to witness it. You had that too, once. You wondered if anyone would ever look at you the same, ever again.

Neteyam felt overwhelmed, a feeling he didn't experience too often in life. He was being pulled away in all directions, by people he's known all his life, with wide smiles and words of congratulations and elation for the mateship, for the incredible new progress made with a powerful clan they've never been close to prior to this, for being the next Olo'eyktan, for news of his approaching fatherhood. So many opportunities, once greater than the other, he realised, and he was grateful - for the attention and the love, the care that never diminished even with his family's departure. He tried to listen and engage, but his eyes couldn't stop themselves from being drawn to one figure, and one alone.

It was surreal, looking at you, the you that didn't quite look like you, and yet, even twice as tall and a different colour... a different species altogether, even as you stood right now, back turned to him, talking to his family, you were still someone he would be able to recognise instantly, for the rest of his life. Your tail, a now clear window into your emotions, gave away the anxiety and alertness that mirrored his own. It was good to know this wasn't affecting only him, that much like your whole lives, as long as you had each other, neither of you ever had to go through anything completely by yourselves. He was sad, so sad, that he knew nothing about your life anymore, except for the small snippets he overheard or the few pieces of information he sought out in the few moments, far and few in between, when his heart didn't feel like it was crushed under the weight of your momentous memory, that was still too heavy to lift proudly, with a head held high.

Before his mind could wander in waters too deep and dangerous to safely swam in, the voice of the new Olo'eyktan pulled him out of his musings, and it was almost contagious, his celebratory demeanour.

"To celebrate the return of our Toruk Makto and his family, the brightest feathers in the bow that is the Omaticaya clan, and the upcoming Iknimaya and Uniltaron of our four Tawtute, I now declare the official start of the festivities. May the hunts of life forever bring you back home, Jakesulli, Neytiri, Neteyam, Kiri, Lo'ak, little Tuk. And to our little humans, may Eywa bless your endeavours and allow you to join us as part of the People, forever and for always."

He was good at this, Neteyam noted. Being a leader. Tarsem wasn't much older than Neteyam, but, right now, he felt like there were mountains separating them. He was poised and intrepid, he commanded everyone's attention in a way that only his father ever did, and he realised in that moment that, despite being heartbroken about it at the time, he had been right to choose him, instead of his own son.

The celebration was as exuberant and exhilarating as Neteyam remembered, and with the nerves plaguing him for weeks gently out of the way, he was able to enjoy himself and relax, catching up with his grandmother and his friends, all people he's missed dearly. The one he missed the most kept busy with his siblings, almost making a point to avoid him, which he couldn't blame you for, although the effort was not enough to prevent the way your eyes met regularly, subconsciously searching for each other, even now, after all this time. So many things have changed, monumental and forever-altering, and yet, somehow, he didn't think this ever will.

"He will need a mate soon. The Tsa'hik is tired, Jakesully."

It was way past eclipse when his grandmother's words pulled him out of the pleasant conversation he was having with an older friend, and he turned to her and watched as she smiled a sly smile, giving a pointed look to his mother. "And since my daughter decided to abandon me, I need a new Tsakarem. The clan, now more than most, needs stability, they need to know they will be in good hands."

"Ah, Mo'at... he's still young, give him time. He will find a mate soon enough. He's good looking, intelligent... a good warrior, a good leader. I wouldn't be surprised if women were throwing themselves at his feet."

"They are, but he doesn't have eyes for any of them. In fact, there's only one person he sees, and it's obvious to everyone but her."

Neteyam followed his grandmother's gaze and felt his breath hitch in his throat at who it landed on.

As he dug into the food that he missed so much, that he loved with all his heart, that was so carefully prepared by the best hands in the clan, it all tasted spoiled and rotten in his mouth, as soon as his eyes locked on your figure on the other side of the fire, laughing wildly in an intimate display of affection, while Tarsem's hand was placed carelessly on your thigh.

And if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow And it's alright now

taglist: rebeccao03 @i-live-in-a-fantasy-daydream @eywaeveng @midnight1812 @fanboyluvr

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theshelbyclan · 3 years ago

Text

Kings of Camden

Summary: Alfie dares you to be more brave, so you decide to show him just how bold you can be

(Gif by @mensource)

A/N: I love this idea so much!! anon requested: Looking at a gif of Alfie just now I realized he has a crown tattoo on his hand and I have one on my wrist and now I can’t stop thinking about Alfie’s reaction if you ever got the same tattoo as him and surprised him w it. 😩😩I saw that you’re requests were open and just HAD to give this idea to someone. AHH I love that you have this tattoo and I’m kinda jealous and may or may not have pondered getting one myself… Anyways, I hope you like what I did with this, even though it’s short, and thank you again for being this awesome Words: 1534 ***

“Truth or dare?” He stroked his beard pensively, “There’s no such thing, though, love. Truth is such a relative concept, right, and it’s made up by people, innit? And if it’s made up by people…” You interrupted him with a sigh, “Play the fucking game, Alfie. Truth or dare?”

“Where do you even pick up these fucking games? I mean, I was in the boy scouts, just like any other decent man, and even we didn’t play fucking truth or dare…” You fixed him with a dark stare. Also, you were quite certain that Alfie Solomons had never been a boy scout, even though the thought did tickle you.

“Right,” he decided, “Dare it is.”

You clapped your hands in excitement, “I dare you to kiss Ollie!” “For fuck’s sake.” “Go on,” you urged, practically giggling with glee, “you have to!” Alfie threw his head back in mock despair, “Woman, you’ve bloody done it now, ain’t you. I’m through with you, I really fucking am, because this is no longer a game, but it has now turned into some heathen ritual of humiliation…” “Stop putting it off. Ollie’s cute and you know it.” “He is, ain’t he,” Alfie mumbled almost lovingly, “Alright then,” and he bellowed, “Ollie! Come here for a minute, mate.”

Ollie stumbled in with his usual look of bewilderment on his face, “What, Alfie?” “Come here,” Alfie motioned, “won’t hurt you, I promise, go one, come here…” It was clear that the Jewish boy grew suspicious, but still he approached. And without any warning, Alfie suddenly planted a quick kiss on his lips, and pulling away just as quick with the biggest smile on his face. Ollie, on the other hand, yelped like a little girl. “You can go now,” Alfie motioned with a hand. And quick as lightning, Ollie was gone. “Poor Ollie,” you laughed out loud. “He’s alright,” your smug friend commented, “should be used to it by now…”

And this what you and Alfie Solomons were like together: always playing. Except when you weren’t, when one of you was hurt or threatened, you tore down kingdoms for each other. There couldn’t be one without the other, ever since you were kids. You and him, against the world. And you had never loved anyone more than him.

***

On your way to the shops, you were singing a little to yourself. Your shift had ended early, because of an accident at the factory, and you had suddenly found yourself with some extra time on your hands. Alfie hated you working, didn’t think it fitting for his girl, but still he knew better than to challenge you on it.

On your way, you thought about something Alfie had said to you. Apart from playing these games with him, he said you always played it safe. That you cared too much about what other people thought. And it had irritated you that he thought so, mainly because you knew he was right. You did as people expected of you, except when you were with him. It was like you only dared to be adventurous when you were with him, and no one else was allowed to see that side of you. Maybe it was time to show the world how bold you could really be. So you whispered to yourself, “Truth or dare…” And your mind, suddenly aroused with excitement, told you: dare! And you asked the first sailor you came across, because he was bound to know. Quickly, before you could change your mind, you decided you were going to do something that really, really scared you, just to show Alfie you could be brave too. About an hour later, you were standing outside the tattoo shop again. It had taken them some convincing, but eventually the artist had agreed. Adrenaline still pumping, you looked at your new ink, shining brightly on your wrist. You smiled at yourself, proud of what you’d just done. And then you hurried to show Alfie. But on your way, fear started flooding you. What if he didn’t like it? Maybe he’d tell you’d been an idiot? And what if you two wouldn’t be together forever? Then this new tattoo would look stupid! And, most of all, what would people say? You suddenly envisioned your life as an outcast of society and it wasn’t a great image… You found Alfie at his bakery, who greeted you with his usual, “Hello, love!” You didn’t reply, because for the life of you, you couldn’t find the words. “What’s happened?” he demanded, serious at once, “I’ll fucking kill them.” “Nothing,” you stuttered, “I just think I’ve made a mistake, Alfie…” “No, you haven’t,” he seemed absolutely certain, “you’re the smart one, ain’t you, sweetheart, you think things through. You plan and scrutinize and organize and strategize…” “Not when I’m with you,” you interrupted. Alfie grinned, “And I like it that way.” You showed him your tattoo of a crown, identical to the one he had on his hand. For a moment, Alfie seemed lost for words. “I know,” you said, utterly defeated. And then he burst out laughing, loud and high-pitched, “Who the fuck are you and what the fuck have you done to my Y/N? Because this, this isn’t you, right?” “I dared myself.” “You fucking dared yourself… like the devil in de desert, yeah?” “If you’re the devil, then, yeah,” you could smile a little already. Alfie always managed to cheer you up somehow. He took your wrist in his hand and studied the tattoo, “That’s gorgeous, that is,” the verdict finally came.

“You really think so?” “Yeah!”, he called out, “That is brilliant, it really is, sweetheart, because you know what? It just so happens to be, right, that I’ve got one on my hand that is quite similar to that one. Who would’ve thought, eh?” You grinned. Alfie was silent for a bit and then said, “You’re staying with me tonight, sweetheart.” “Am I?” “Be bold,” he challenged, “you know you can now.” You knew you’d stay. You always would. “You got a tattoo of a fucking crown,” he mused out loud, “just like that. Now that shows some fucking balls, doesn’t it,” he continued talking to himself as he walked away, “and she dared herself, imagine that!” And then he called over his shoulder, “Didn’t think it possible, but I think I love you even more now, darling!”

***

At night, even London was quiet. When you were kids, you used to sneak out of your homes to meet up and you’d wreak havoc wherever you went. When you got a little older, you still snuck out, but tried to attract as little attention as you could. By the docks you’d find each other and in the dark, you became intertwined in every way possible. Ever since, the nights were yours. During the day, others could expect things of you and demand your attention, but at night, you’d always come back to each other. And so here you were, lying together in the dark, in a world entirely of your own.

“Truth or dare, baby,” you said, softly. “Truth.” Pausing for a moment, you asked, almost shy, “Do you really love me?” He grinned deeply, “Nah, it was my turn, wasn’t it?” “Cheat,” you grumbled, knowing he was right, “Fine, but you better answer me after mine is done.” “Truth or dare?” Alfie said triumphantly. “Truth.”

He pretended to think about it for a long time, “How about you come live with me, permanently?” You furrowed your brows, “What do you mean?”

“You know, right here, in Camden. Or we could move to someplace quiet, if that suits you better, although quiet and peaceful might be the last words I associate with you if I’m being perfectly honest… I’ve always loved the quiet little place by the name of Margate… But wherever you want, sweetheart, you tell me and I’ll make it happen. Tear down the whole of fucking London for you. Just you and me,” he waved his hands elaborately. And when you didn’t react, he added, “I’m asking you to marry me, sweetheart!” “Ooh…” your eyes widened, as you suddenly understood, “are you sure though?” “Course I am. “Wait!” you suddenly called out, “What about Edna?” Alfie frowned, “Who?” “Someone said you were married to a woman named Edna?” “Someone’s been telling fucking lies, haven’t they, because obviously I’m not married to some shikse named Edna.”

You smiled and looked deeply into the eyes of the man you loved. It was strange how he could be so terrifying, how people flinched when they heard him speak, because he sounded either mad or simply dangerous, and how people were put off by his appearance. But when you looked at him, like really looked at him, you only saw this utter and complete softness. “Yeah, I’ll marry you, Alfie.” “You can be my queen then,” he said gently, puppy-dog eyes staring at you, devoted, “with a crown to match.” You smiled cheekily, “You can be queen and I’ll be the king.” “Fine, we’ll both be kings. You and me. ”

And when you snuggled closer to him, Alfie knew you were finally satisfied.

*** Masterlist

#peaky blinders #peaky blinder imagine #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinders fanfiction #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinders fluff #alfie solomons #solomons #tom hardy #alfie solomons x reader #kings of camden #theshelbyclan

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supermarvel-fics · 2 years ago

Text

Tickletober Day 14: Tracing

fandom: marvel

word count: 670

pairing: peter 1 x reader (platonic)

summary: peter is curious about your tattoos and asks to see them

“Can I see them?” Peter excitedly asked you as he followed you down the hallway. The teen had just found out that you had a plethora of tattoos, now eager to see the ink marking your skin.

“Why do you want to see them?” You continued on your journey to the common room, book in hand, along with an amused smile. Peter swerved to stand in front of you, but began walking backwards so you wouldn’t have to stop.

“Because all my friends are in high school! They don’t have any tattoos.”

“Oh, so I’m your friend, now? I thought I was too old,” You chuckled, remembering a conversation Peter had with Tony about the Avenger’s being ‘too old’ to be his friend. He was picked on relentlessly after that, since he hung around the tower more than he did with his own classmates. You all knew he was bluffing, anyway.

“You’re the youngest one, so that makes you closer to my age, so I can make an exception. Come on, please?” Peter pleaded, stopping in the doorway to the common area to block you access to the room. You looked at the over-enthused boy, finding that you couldn’t say no to him. He reminded you of your younger brother so much that you’d probably do anything he asked.

“Fine, I’ll show you,” You said, nodding your head to the large sofa in the middle of the room. You knew it would be empty since most of the heroes had gone on a mission, and the ones who didn’t were homebodies anyway. They often stayed in their rooms.

Peter whirled back around and practically ran to the couch with you following behind. Sitting beside him, you rolled up your sleeves as much as you could so that he could see the colorful ink adorning your skin.

“Woah,” Peter marveled, eyes roaming all over your forearms. “How come you never show them?”

You shrugged. “I’ve grown accustomed to wearing long sleeves in training and my suit protects my entire body. I don’t think about it much.”

“Do you have more that aren’t on your arms?” Peter glanced up at you expectantly, drawing a smile out of you.

“Yes, but those are for my eyes only. This is all you’re getting out of me,” You chuckled, twisting your arms so he could better see the tattoo sleeve.

“Did they hurt?”

“You have a lot of questions, Pete.”

“I’m curious!”

You shook your head, answering his question. “Not all of them. There were a few near my inner elbow that hurt, but most of them were tolerable.”

“C-Can I touch them?” He anxiously asked. You grinned, sticking your right arm out towards him.

“Go on.”

Peter placed the pads of his fingers on your arm, tracing the shapes of the objects that covered your arm. He glided his nails down to your wrist, earning him an unexpected twitch of your arm. “Sorry!”

You were quick to reassure him. “It wasn’t you! Well, it was you, but you didn’t hurt me, Peter. It just… tickled a bit. I’m fine.”

“Oh,” He breathed out in relief, resuming his path along you arm. “Wait, you’re ticklish?”

Your eyes shot up to meet his, noticing a smirk forming on his features. “Yes, and last I checked, you are too, so don’t get any ideas.”

Peter’s face turned a shade of red you’d never seen before as he ducked his head and went back to tracing each and every one of your tattoos. It was bearable when he drug his fingers over the top of your arm, but the second he came into contact with the taut skin of your wrist or inner elbow, your arm involuntarily jolted.

“Man, I can’t believe your arms are ticklish. That’s so weird,” He laughed at you. You pulled your arm away from him in faux offense, squeezing the top of his knee with your other hand.

“Don’t get too cocky, Peter. Tony showed me all your spots.”

#marvel #marvel tickle #mcu #lee!reader #ticklish!reader #ler!peter1 #tickle prompts #tickle fic #tickle drabble #sfw tickle fic #augtickletober2022 #tickletober prompts #tickletober2022 #peter parker #peter 1

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hansensgirl · 4 years ago

Text

not all who wander are lost.

summary. | He’s got your name on his tattoo, wearing the same damn clothes since three days ago. A bottle of gin in his hand, and you’d say he’s just wandering.

warnings. | Strangers to lovers, smut, naive reader, mentions of trauma, angst, fluff, slight violence, slight dub/con, slight blasphemy, drinking, DD/LG, daddy kink, corruption kink, ring/hand kink, size kink, creampie kink, teasing, spanking, choking, spitting, manhandling, praise, male masturbation, handjob, degradation, a bit of humiliation, oral sex, virginity loss, marking, and more. 18+ MINORS DNI.

word count. | 11k

pairings. | Daddy!Destroyer!Chris x Little!Reader.

a/n. | one of the few fics inspired/based off of chemtrails over the country club. please heed the warnings and don’t forget to reblog. ily! thank you so much to @dragon-of-dreams @mypoisonedvine @tenuntilfightcall and everyone else for helping me out with some information! and thank you to my bb sara @asadmarveltrashbag for beta-ing and being there for me during this insane month, ilysm!!

The first time he laid eyes on you, was six months ago.

Meadows like the ones that surround him only exist in movies and Instagram posts. But even those need editing for perfection. Yet, the ones around him made him feel as though he has camera lenses for his eyes. Each piece of grass is a beautiful green, and some had flowers between them. His thighs may hurt but the view is a reward for all the trouble he just went through. A cute cottage lies on the hill he stands on. It resembles one from a Pinterest board but he doesn’t mind.

Birds chirp, sheep bleat, cows low and chickens cluck amongst Ella Fitzgerald's rendition of Summertime. Chris walks a few more steps and onto the porch he goes. This isn’t his destination. Well, technically, it is. But he isn’t supposed to be knocking on your door like he is now, and his heart shouldn’t be beating out of his chest. To the right of this cottage — Chris’s right — is another cottage.

It’s more modern than he’d prefer it to be. It only looks so because inside lives a drug lord who is on the run. It’s truly unfortunate his girlfriend sold him out for immunity. He knocks on the wooden door and takes a step back. Who knows what kind of person is behind it. “Coming!” your sweet voice calls. Chris doesn’t let go of his grip on his gun that’s down the waist of his pants.

Even the sweetest seeming things can always end up being sour.

You struggle not to trip over your own dress. The tail of it drags behind you and sweeps the floor, too. But it makes you feel just like a princess, so you don’t care. On your hip is a basket, and inside is Cotton. Your bunny. She’s been your company for years, and you don’t know what you’d do without her. Barely anyone visits anymore, only because cars can’t handle the long drive up and many people hate nature. But when the occasional knock on your door echoes throughout the house, you can barely keep your excitement inside.

You open the door and gasp. The man… is brooding. And he’s not the type of broody that would grumble insults under his breath or the type that would stalk people, either. He’s the dreamy type, the man your parents say is bad news when really he just needs love. You take in his form. You can tell he’s slightly tired and you just have to give him credit for walking up to your home. He has no flaws, except for the dirt that stains his clothing.

“Hi, do you live here?” the strange man asks, looking around the inside of your home. You jump and you’re not sure why but your skin raises with goosebumps. His voice is deep yet so soft-spoken. For some odd reason, his hand is reaching backwards and you assume that it’s because he has some sort of ache from the walk. You finally register his words and look up at him.

“Y- yes, do you live here?” you stupidly ask. You don’t even realize what you just said until you noticed his puzzled look. “Oh, sorry,” you look down and notice that his black boots are covered in pollen, something that can be oh so bothersome. “‘S’alright, I was hiking a- and I don’t have anywhere to go… Do you think you could let me stay here?” he asks, letting go of the gun. “Uhm, s- sure, what’s your name?” you ask him, moving out of the way.

Naive, so fucking naive.

“Chris, what’s yours?” he asks, stepping inside. You give him your name and he nods. He goes to wipe his shoes on the rug in front of the door but there is no rug. You hand him a rag and he gratefully takes him, mumbling a small ‘thank you.’ “Are you a tourist?” you ask him, setting your basket down onto the floor. Cotton hops out of it and runs off to the kitchen, probably to chew on your apron. “No…” he solemnly answers. He hands you the rag back and you shyly take it.

“O- okay… Are you a photographer? I’ll tell you God’s truth, the most beautiful photos are taken when the sun rises, when it sets and when it’s raining,” you pointedly inform him. You drop the rag into your basket and turn back around, your dress spinning in a slight swirl. His eyes rake your body up and down, taking in every inch of your body. Red cloth with white polka dots covers your body and your mushroom earrings bring the entire outfit together. Chris has to assume that the heavens above or whatever the fuck else is there have handcrafted you to absolute perfection.

He’s never read any stories about Greek gods, but he knows that Zeus would be absolutely infatuated with you. He takes note of how your body tenses up when he makes eye contact with you, and he gives you a small smile.

“I’m not a photographer,” he clarifies, looking around. He can’t believe you let him in just like that, but the more he found, the more he understood why. A lonely, innocent little girl like you doesn’t have anyone to tell you right from wrong. “Then what are you, sir? Are you lost? I can call the Consulate if you’d like,” you offer, walking towards him. “I’m not lost… I’m a wanderer,” he whispers almost hesitatingly.

“But you only ever wander when you’re lost, no?” you confusingly ask him. He clicks his tongue and shakes his head, before peering out of the window. Luckily, he has a direct view of the other cottage. He really did hit the jackpot. “Not all who wander are lost, little girl. Now tell me, why would you let a stranger inside your home?” he asks you.

Cotton hops from the kitchen to your bedroom, and you stand in place. “I… Well, I’m not sure. You didn’t give me any reason to not let you in or to make me believe you’re dangerous, sorry…” you shyly tell him. “Don’t apologize, just know that not everyone in this world is good. There’s always going to be someone with a little more darkness than the rest of us…”

Chris unzips his duffle bag, and you let out a giggle. “Quite ominous of you, but then again, it suits your whole aesthetic. The cool, bearded man, with his cool words,” you smile at him, but it carries a bit of sadness. “Treat this place as your own, make yourself at home. And if you need anything, I’m always here.”

Chris stays at the window for most of his days. Always with a pair of binoculars and a pack of saltine crackers. Sometimes, he pulls a juice bottle out of his duffle bag, You’ve countlessly offered him something that’s actually filling, such as angel cake and sandwiches. He rejects them all, and you wonder if he’s some sort of super-human. But technology hasn’t invented wireless technology yet, so it’s impossible.

“Uhm, Mr. Chris-Sir? I don’t think those crackers are good for you, they’re all you eat…” you sheepishly admit, carrying a cup of water to him. The mug has a little frog painted on it, but the green paint has chipped away over seven years. You set it down gently, onto the table next to him and Chris just stares out at the cottage. “Bird-watching is so cool, isn’t it? If you see a robin, let me know, they’re so beautiful,” you tell him, before walking off.

At first, he doesn’t take in your words. But once they’ve settled deep in his mind and sunk in, he realizes that you assume he’s bird-watching. He’d honestly take any other assumption, but at least you don’t know he’s spying on the criminal next door. He looks down at the table with a sigh and then notices what you’ve done. Not only did you set a cup of water down, but you also gave him two slices of toast. One has strawberry jam on it, and the other has melted butter.

His mouth surprisingly salivates, but it also doesn’t shock him. Every day he sits there, basking in the beautiful smell of your food and humming. His personal favourite is the smell of focaccia bread being baked. He watches and waits until you leave the room to go tend to the chickens. Apparently, one of them laid a few eggs. He quickly shovels the two slices of toast into his mouth and downs the glass of water like a starved man. Because he is one.

Cotton hopes around once again but all Chris sees is a fluffy white blur. He recalls his memories from when he was younger. Younger him always wanted a pet. Even a fish that would die in the span of two weeks would suffice. But his mom couldn’t afford it, so he dropped the idea. Sometimes, he wishes he had dropped other ideas, as well. Like the idea that he’d enjoy life as an undercover agent, or the idea of sacrificing himself for Erin.

His fingers are sticky with jam. He hates the feeling. He spreads his fingers out and goes to get up from his seat. “Shit,” he curses, realizing that something may happen while he’s away from the window. He stands there, contemplating whether or not he should risk his mission just to wash the fucking jam off of his stupid fucking hands. He calls your name, loudly, hoping you’ll hear him all the way outside the cottage.

“Is everything alright?” you shout, running inside the house. He didn’t expect that reaction, but he’ll take it. You’re holding onto the corner of two walls, slightly bent over. Your chest, your beautiful chest, is the first thing Chris lays his eyes on. He nearly chokes on his saliva, and he just can’t seem to take his eyes off of you. “Uh, hi, I need help,” he gruffly says, his voice a bit deeper than usual. He clears his throat with a loud ‘ahem’ and you begin to stand up straight, much to his dismay.

But he doesn’t think the image of your tits nearly falling out of your dress will leave his mind any time soon.

“Of course… Did you enjoy the toast? I can make you some more if you’d like,” you shyly offer him. “It was good, but I’m fine, thanks though. Can you stay here, right at the window, while I go wash my hands? If anything happens, you have to tell me.” Chris doesn’t leave any room for argument, but your curiosity and naivety get the best of you as always.

“What happens if I don’t tell you?” you ask him, walking towards the window. He blocks your path and suddenly personal space is no longer a thing you need. “You don’t want to know what I’m gonna do if you don’t, little girl,” he warns with a hint of lust in his tone. You nod your head and feel tingles bloom just above your core. You’re not sure whether they’re butterflies or those tingles.

Chris walks past you and you quickly rush to the window. You never realized how beautiful this view is until now. The sun is bright, angled in the most perfect manner so that it doesn’t shine directly in your eyes. The sky is so clear, even with the occasional fluffy cloud that always manages to look like some animal. The window blows gently, shaking the sheer curtains that frame you. You sigh and fold your arms, resting them on the windowsill.

You lay your head on your arms and stare out the window with joy filling your heart.

Chris watches you as you look out the window. You’re slightly bent over, once again. Your ass sticks out, and you subconsciously sway your hips side to side, almost purposefully teasing him. Your white dress has a few strings hanging from the hem, but it doesn’t make you look any less gorgeous. He feels like he’s in a dream.

Not only because of the beautiful scenery, and the beautiful woman in front of him but also because he’s trying his hardest to wash his hands quickly, but his movements are so slow. He looks down and rubs his hands together at a furious pace. Chris hears you gasp and he looks up. “Did you see something?” he asks you, turning off the sink.

“Yeah, my neighbour! I haven’t seen him in months, I need to go say hi,” you tell Chris, before rushing out the door. He only then registers your words once you’ve run out of the house and into the unknown. “Fuck- Wait!” he yells after you. He runs behind you and is so grateful when he notices you haven’t gone too far. But you’re still running and Chris’s target is about ten meters away, so he decides to do what he does best.

He decides to save you.

Chris’s feet hit the ground harshly, crushing the flowers beneath him. Running in socks isn’t fun, but at least he has something to protect him. He calls your name and crashes into you with all the force in his body. You both go down and hit the ground from his fierce tackling technique. You go to cry out in pain and lose your mind, but Chris clams his hand over your mouth. “Shh, be quiet. You’re not hurt, okay? I’m sorry I had to do that, but you can’t go running off like that,” he lectures, throwing his right leg over your body. He frames you down, and you don’t have much room to move. You’re frozen in place, chest heaving, and you furrow your eyebrows at his words.

“Listen, I need you to listen. You may not know me and I may not know you, but when I tell you to do something, you’re going to listen. Understood?” he chastised with a harsh tone. You nod meekly, like a little kid who just got caught with their hand in the cookie jar. “And just so you know, that sweet neighbour of yours over there is wanted by the Feds.” Chris looks over his shoulder and doesn’t see the man there anymore, so he begrudgingly climbs off of your body.

You gulp thickly, out of fear and nervousness. Chris doesn’t seem to want to add on to this newfound information, so your anxiety makes work of it. For all you know, your neighbour could be a murderer. Chris senses your nervousness and gives you a pat on the head, almost as if you’re his pet.

Unbeknownst to you, the sight of you under him, helpless and with his hand clamped over your mouth is something that gets his blood (and hand) pumping. He helps you up, and you don’t even realize it until he brushes some dandelion seeds out of your hair. “Thank you… and thank you for saving me, I’m sorry I didn’t listen,” you shyly speak to him. He nods and shoves his hands into his pockets, finding an old cigarette from before he quit.

“‘S’alright, I just need a few things from you,” he gruffly reassured. “O- Of course, anything for my guest and for the man who saved my life,” you beam with a small giggle punctuating your words. He basks in it, almost as though it’s sunlight over a beach. “Ah, you flatter me. Just tell me about yourself, I’m going to be staying for a while,” he says as he turns around to walk back inside.

A bottle of gin is in Chris’s hands. The colourless yet pale yellow liquid swishes inside its rightful bottle. It’s half full, only because last night, he downed the rest. He hasn’t drunk in a while. Since he got over being left for dead. And that’s only six months ago.

He’s shirtless. Only left in his grey jeans and jewelry. His rings clink against the glass bottle and his bracelets hang a little past his wrist. The gunshot wound on his left side had a faint scar on it. He hates it. Every single time he stares in the mirror, that fucking scar just stares back at him.

His father told him it makes him seem more ‘manly’, but it just feels like a point of weakness. Maybe if he was a little quicker, he would’ve saved that bank teller. He would’ve gotten Silas behind bars. He would’ve been able to be proud of himself.

Chris groans at the memories and spins the cap off of the bottle. It flies somewhere across the room, probably hitting one of the wood walls. He mumbles a ‘fucking hell’ and brings the bottle to his lips. The last time he drank like this was three months ago, and he ended up fucking the bartender.

She was bent over the counter, her tits spilled out of her bra and his cock pummeled into her sloppily.

She ended up kicking him out after they were done.

Chris groans again and sits down on the bed, kicking his legs up. His pants are stained with the pigment of dandelions and grass. The splotchy stains are juxtaposed to the grey of his old jeans. They have wear and tear all over them, but he doesn’t care.

Every now and then, he sighs — he sighs quite deeply. The puffs of air come from deep inside his chest. He tilts his head back and stares up at the ceiling, thinking back to earlier today. He smiles to himself, recalling the way you looked so innocent beneath him.

He’s only known you for a few days, and he already has lewd thoughts for you. Fuck. He just can’t help himself, though. Especially with your innocent doe eyes and pretty little dresses. He closes his eyes slowly, using that memory to fuel his much-needed mental images.

You’re beneath him once again, but you’re naked. His hand is wrapped around your throat, and he’s naked too. His cock is slowly driving in and out of you. He’s teasing you. Your pulsating, wet walls hug his fat cock, and you’re both moaning softly.

“Daddy…” you whisper to him, clenching around his cock. “What’s wrong, baby?” he softly asks you. “Please fuck me harder, please, Daddy,” you beg to him, before biting down onto your bottom lip. “I don’t think you’ll be able to take my cock like that, baby,” he shakes his head.

“I can take it, Daddy, I’m your good girl.”

Chris opens his eyes and his right hand has found its way down his boxers. His cock is all swollen and hard, hard as a rock. He places the bottle of gin down on the bedside table and gets himself all comfortable. Chris slowly begins to stroke himself gently. He goes from the base all the way to the top, and then back down. His thumb occasionally swipes against his leaking tip and all he can think of is teaching you how to make him — your Daddy — feel good.

“Fuck, baby,” he moans, feeling a vein throat against his hand. He moans your name and speeds up his movements. His fingers are slightly sticky, but it’s the type of sticky he doesn’t mind. He begins to slow his hand down, and he sighs, not wanting to come just yet. He hasn’t been this hard in ages, and touching himself feels so fucking good.

“Did you say my name? Is everything alright?” you ask, barging into his room. He jumps and his hand flies out of his pants. You both stare at each other, not even daring to blink. You eventually break eye contact and notice the bottle of gin sitting on the bedside table. There’s only a sixth of it left, and you frown. You don’t like it when people you care about drink. “Uhm…” he awkwardly scratches the back of his neck and then takes in your form.

You’re in a nightgown, and it’s sheer as fuck. The gin gets to him and his mind has a slight buzz to it. His heart beats rapidly and his cock throbs with want and need. Chris’s eyes rake up and down your body like how they usually do whenever you’re in front of him. His mother would scold him for ogling at you, but he just doesn’t care anymore.

“I- I am so so so sorry, I should’ve knocked. I just thought you needed help with something because I heard you say my name, but sometimes I just tend to hear random things, so sorry,” you apologize in a panicking manner. You slowly walk back to the door, but you don’t turn around. Your bare feet leave a faint imprint on the floor from the cold sweats that have taken over your body.

“Come back here,” he orders, sitting up on the bed. Chris’s unbuckled belt clanks quietly, and he begins to remove it in one quick motion. You gulp thickly and exhale shakily. You slowly walk to where Chris is sitting, and he pats the spot next to him. You’ve never had such an interaction with anyone, ever. You sit down next to him, but you keep your distance.

Alcohol should not be called alcohol in Chris’s utmost humble opinion. No, it should just stick to its nickname ‘liquid courage’ because it’s more accurate than anything else. He may not seem like it, but he’s just a man who doesn’t have the heart to do much. Adrenaline doesn’t exist for him anymore, not since the incident.

Chris turns his head and stares at your pretty face. You look down, unable to make eye contact with such a God-like man. You have to assume that even Apollo is envious of Chris’s beauty. “How’d you hear me? Because I know these walls aren’t thin enough, and I know I wasn’t being loud, so tell me; How’d you hear me?” he interrogates you like one of Silas’s companions, but this time is slightly different.

Lust is what’s pumping through his veins, not rage.

“Uhm, well… My room was right there, and I wasn’t doing anything but thinking, and since your bed is against the wall, I- I heard you say my name,” you explain shyly. He hums, and you’re not sure whether it’s a hum of delight or disbelief. “Thinking of what?” he presses, inching his body closer to yours.

You continue to stare at his hand, even though you can feel his heavy breathing against your face. “I… Well- I was uh,” you stutter embarrassingly, and it makes you burn up with shame. “Spit it out, little girl, and don’t think of lying to me,” he growls, placing his hand on your thigh. Your gaze follows his movements, and you take in the set of rings that adorn his fingers.

They’re all black and of similar styles. One has a skull, one is completely plain, one has a cross on it and the last one has the word ‘Daddy’ engraved on it. His veins are so prominent. They bulge out with intensity, and you’d just love to trail your fingers along each of them. “Am I going to have to force an answer out of you?” he roughly asks. His other hand goes to the back of your head and he brings your gaze to his face.

You quickly shake your head in objection, and he raises his eyebrows for you to spit your answer out. “I was thinking about you, and the way you tackled me…” you admit to him in a low and soft voice. “You liked the way I was on you, little girl?” he asks, moving his hand to the back of your neck. “Y- Yeah, made me feel all… Tingly…” you whisper to him.

“I want to hear you say it, little girl,” Chris ushers, squeezing the back of your neck slightly. “I liked the way you were on top of me…” you tell him breathlessly. “Good girl,” he praises in a slightly deep voice. He pulls you onto his lap and you gasp. His hard, wanting cock is right under your thighs, and you exhale nervously.

“You feel that, little girl? That’s all because of you, you did this to me. And you’re proud of it, aren’t you? Got me so fucking hard just because of you.” Chris squeezes your waist, and you really can feel it all. He’s not wrong, either. You’re so proud that you’ve made a man like him so desperate for you. “Do you know what I was doing, little girl? I was jerking off to the thought of fucking that cunny of yours until you’re begging me to stop,” he growls in your ear.

You moan softly, and the picture comes to mind, making your pussy gush with want. “Bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” he asks, placing his hand on your inner thigh. You nod, and he raises his eyebrows in warning again. “Yeah, I want that so bad,” you murmur to him. You and your pussy want him so bad. Chris’s hand inches further up your thighs until he’s just an inch away from your bare pussy.

Your thighs are already slightly sticky from your arousal. “Do you know what jerking off is, little girl?” he asks, pulling his hand away from your pussy. You hold back a pathetic, child-like whine, and he begins to lift up your nightgown until he sees your naked body. “Kind of… Isn’t that when a man touches himself? Like how women touch their… down there?” you innocently ask him.

Chris chuckles at how cute you are. So innocent yet oh so slutty. “Have you ever touched yourself, little girl?” he asks, lifting the nightgown over your head. It’s strewn across the floor behind you, and neither of you cares. But you quickly use your hands to cover your most precious, most private parts. “No, no, I don’t want to see any of that. You’re so beautiful, baby, you’re built like an absolute angel,” he husks, and you feel so flustered that you can’t help but giggle.

“T- Thank you… And I’ve done it a few times,” you inform him. Chris nods and smirks, catching the way your nipples have pebbled up. “Have you ever made someone feel good before?” he questions, trailing his broad hands up and down your body. “N- No, it’s pretty lonely up here…” you almost-ashamedly admit. He coos at you. “Do you want me to teach you how to make me feel good, little girl?” he questions, palming your tits.

You moan softly and rub your thighs together as he pinches and pulls at your hard nipples. You’re so small in his large hands, it makes him even harder. You nod your head fervently, wanting to make Chris feel so fucking good. Chris takes his hands away from your body and shifts you in his lap. He reaches down his pants and pulls his cock out of his boxers.

You gasp, having never seen something as big as that. He smirks and uses his right hand to grasp the base of his thick cock. Chris brings your dominant hand down to where his cock is and guides you to wrap your fingers around him. Chris shudders at your soft touch, and he moans softly. “Good girl, yeah,” he praises. “Wrap your hand around me a bit tighter, baby,” he urges, and you do exactly that.

He groans loudly and a small smile stretches across your lips. “N- Now, you’ve got to move your hand up and down. Start off slowly, go all the way to the tip, and then back down,” he instructs, even though he’s helping you out. His hand brings yours all the way to the tip, and then back down; just like he said. His hand leaves yours and goes back to feeling up your pretty body.

“Now do it by yourself, but in a twisting motion, little girl.”

You listen to his words and jerk him off, feeling yourself get wet as his cock twitches in your hand. Your clit throbs and so do the veins on the side of his shaft. Chris curses, and you bite down on your bottom lip. “Good girl, just like that. Fuck, your hand feels so good around me,” he moans, squeezing your waist. You focus on his cock, watching as pre-cum leaks from the tip and down the side of his dick.

It drips onto your slow-moving hand, and you exhale as your movements grow a bit faster. You look at him, watching as his pupils darken with lust. You can tell — it’s written on his face — he wants you to go faster. Your hand speeds up around his cock, making him a moaning mess. “Fuck, you’re such a good fucking girl. You like making me feel good, don’t you? So eager to please like the good little girl you are,” Chris husks.

His praise goes straight to your needy cunt and he knows this because he can just tell. Your thighs rub together, your breath hitches, you let out a giggle and squeeze a little tighter around his cock. Chris’s hand goes up to your head and smashes your lips against his. You both moan into the kiss, and you straddle both his thighs to get more comfortable.

You place your other hand on his cock and mimic your dominant hand’s movements. You try to keep up with the kiss, but you just can’t. Teeth clash and so do tongues as Chris moves his mouth against yours. He pants and his chest heaves as you continue to stroke him. “Go faster, baby,” he urges, and he pulls his mouth away from yours. He can feel you soaking his jeans, your wetness joining the abundant amount of rips and tears in the material.

Your hand moves faster, twisting perfectly and occasionally squeezing his most sensitive spots as well. Chris pushes your hands away abruptly, and you’re confused. Did you do something wrong? Does he not like you anymore? What happened? “Shit, wrap your mouth around the tip, little girl. Trust me, you’re gonna fucking love it,” he says, and you quickly do so.

You’ll do anything to please him. His mushroom tip is leaking and a raging red. It’s the same red as the rest of his cock, and you could swear it’s almost purplish. You can tell he’s aching because you’ve been through a similar thing. You drop down to the floor and kneel in front of Chris. Your lips smooth around the tip of his hard cock, and you can taste him as soon as he hits your tongue.

He tastes of musk and manliness, along with a hint of saltiness, and it’s oh so addicting. You keep the tip of his cock in your mouth like it’s one of your favourite lollipops and smile around him. Chris smiles and wraps his hand around himself. He jerks himself off quickly, desperate to come in your mouth. “Fucking shit– god, you’re such a good fucking girl,” Chris rasps as he reaches his climax.,

His balls tighten up and his blue eyes roll back into his skull. White, hot, thick ropes of cum shoot out of his tip and fill your mouth. You’re not sure why, but a moan escapes past your throat, and it only makes Chris’s high much better. Chris places both hands on the sides of your head and holds you there, gently. You swallow all his cum as it fills your mouth and leaks from the corners of your lips.

Chris so desperately wants to push your head farther down his cock, but he knows he shouldn’t. Plus, there’s always going to be more time for things like that. He pulls your head away from his cock and watches as a string of saliva tries to keep the two of you connected. You gently lick your lips, still savouring his taste and he smiles down at you. You can’t lie — you feel giddy. Giddy in a way in which you crave his praise and approval like no other.

“You’re such a good girl, you know that? Thank you for helping me out… I do suppose I should return the favour, right?” he teasingly says, lifting you up into his lap. You shake your head out of nervousness. “No? … Why not, baby?” Chris asks, and you gulp thickly. “Don’t wanna rush it… I- never mind, you wouldn’t understand,” you look down and fiddle with your fingers.

The grooves of your nails are smoothed over by your pointer finger. Some dips and rises make you cringe, and others satisfy you. He looks down at your hands and notices the skin picked on the sides. He knows how painful those can be, and he doesn’t want you to feel any pain at all. “I’ll try to understand, darling, but if you don’t tell me, then I’ll be completely clueless,” he speaks to you lowly. “I like the way your words make me feel…” you shyly admit to him.

“Aw, how do they make you feel, baby?” Chris presses, grasping your two hands together. “All warm and small… makes me feel like I have it all. Hey, that rhymes!” you exclaim, bubbling in the utmost adorable giggles ever. “You’re a natural poet, darling. But tell me more…” he urges, rubbing his coarse thumbs against your soft skin. “I get butterflies, and I feel all shy and safe. Your words make me so comfortable yet so vulnerable…” you describe to him even though words can’t describe what you feel.

“Is that right, baby? You’re so cute… Do you- Do you get all tingly and babyish when I use my words?” Chris hesitatingly asks. His voice is so gentle and soft, a low whisper that is so soothing to your ears and rough edges. You nod meekly and smile to yourself. Your cheeks may hurt from all the laughter he caused earlier today but that doesn’t refrain you from hiding your smile.

Now, Chris is no doctor. He’s no professional, he’s no master. He’s just a broken man, but he knows exactly what you’re talking about. But he won’t explain what it is, because he needs you to learn on your own. Maybe with some guidance from him, but he won’t trick you into thinking something completely off base.

“Let’s get cleaned up, okay? Then we’ll sleep, you need the rest. We both do.”

He’s got your name on his tattoo, wearing the same damn clothes since three days ago. A bottle of gin in his hand, and you’d say he’s just wandering. But he isn’t. He was never. The stick-and-poke tattoo may seem a bit much, but he doesn’t regret it one bit. Your name is written in your pretty handwriting. The ink is in his skin, and he’s practically marked as yours, now.

The days go by slower, much slower than he’d like them to. But it doesn’t matter now, because his mission is over, and he’ll be leaving soon. But Chris doesn’t want to leave. His wanderlust has found an end as he finally has a place where he’s meant to be. He’s found heaven in the hills, and between your legs.

“D- Daddy…” you whisper under your breath, loud enough for him to hear. Your hands are locked with his, and they rest at your sides. You’re just in a small bralette, and your hard nipples poke through the fabric. Your legs are thrown over his shoulders and your ankles lace together behind his head. Your neck aches from the angle your body is in, but the pleasure blooming from your core is much more powerful.

Chris is between your legs, and he hums against your wet, throbbing pussy. You moan loudly and squeeze your eyes shut from the feeling. He sucks on your clit harshly, and wetness seeps from your hole. “Feels so good… Oh, my…” you pant. Your hips gyrate and you subconsciously grind your wet cunt against Chris’s face. He pulls his face away from your pussy and licks a broad stripe against you.

You moan again and squeeze his hands tighter. His tongue swirls around your swollen and throbbing clit, bringing you closer and closer to your release. Your taste is addictive, and he could stay between your legs for hours on end, if not for eternities. His beautiful, lovely rings dig into the sides of your fingers, but you don’t care. Chris may treat you like a delicate doll, but he should know how much you love it when he’s rough with you.

“I think I’m gonna come, Daddy…” you cry out to him before a strangled moan leaves your mouth. Chris pulls away from your pussy once again, but this time he spits on your lips. His saliva drops down your cunt and mixes with your wetness, and he goes back to devouring you. He eats you out like a starved man, and you’re squealing at the overwhelming pleasure.

If he was on death row, he’d have your sweet pussy as his last meal.

His tongue works over your clit and brings you closer and closer to your release. It’s coming fast. A searing, heated feeling takes over your body and abdomen as your back arches off your couch. Chris is as hard as a rock, staring you directly in the eyes, and he makes you come on his mouth.

“Oh- Daddy!” you cry out loudly, your mouth falling open into a silent, voiceless scream. Your eyes roll back into your skull and in Chris’s past words, you look like a brain-dead slut. Your wetness gushes out of your drooling hole, and he laps it all up with no problem. He drinks up everything you give him, and then some. Your hands are still laced with his and your chest rises and falls at a fast pace.

“Shh… You did amazing, little one. Taste so fucking sweet, just like nectar,” he hums like a hummingbird, before smacking his lips. You slowly come down from your high as he strokes your hands with his thumbs. Your lids are slightly heavy, but you don’t want to get any shut-eye. Time away from Chris is practically a sin in your eyes. “Thank you, Daddy,” you gratefully reply.

“You’re welcome, little one. Got me so hard,” he husks as he moves to get up. He carefully handles your body and pulls out a handkerchief from the pocket of his jeans. They’ve been washed and scrubbed but there are still faint dandelion and pollen stains that he just doesn’t care enough about. Though the adorable face you were making whilst washing them is something that’ll never leave his mind.

Just like the mental image of you coming undone beneath him.

“Can I make you feel good, Daddy? Pretty please?” you ask sweetly and Chris knows he could say yes, but he doesn’t want to. Making you feel good pleases him, but he doesn’t want to sound so poetic so he chuckles. “Soon, little one, I need to clean you up properly,” he tells you and you jut your bottom lip out, pouting. He coos at you and you scrunch your nose up at the attention.

“But I’m all clean, Daddy!” you reason, reaching over to palm his hard cock through his jeans. Chris chokes on his saliva at the feeling of your touch. “In a bit, little one, you need to listen to Daddy. Okay?” he rasps with a warning in his voice. “Okay, Dada…” you trail off with a deep sigh punctuating your sentence. You fiddle with your fingers as Chris carefully cleans up your pussy.

The damp washcloth is gentle against your sensitive skin. Each movement of his is carried by gentleness and love. “I have a question, Daddy,” you hum after a few seconds of silence. “Go ahead, mushy one,” he says with a smile. You giggle at the nickname before calming yourself down. “Were you really wandering?” you bluntly ask him. Chris’s eyes nearly fall out of their sockets, and you gasp.

“What do you mean, little one?” he asks, looking up at you. “Well… You said you were a wanderer! And that’s how you found me! But you don’t seem like a wanderer, you’re too clever to be one,” you explain with a smile on your face. Chris begins to chew on the inside of his cheek, and the skin has already been filled with bite marks and scars. At this point, he should tell you, right? You already know the deepest, most darkest pieces and part of him.

You’ll love him no matter what.

“Well, I wasn’t wandering. You’re so smart, little one. The smartest baby in the world!” he cheers and moves to get up. He sits in the empty spot next to you and lifts you into his lap. You’re still naked and Chris has his shirt off (as usual), so the skin-on-skin contact has you feeling even sleepier. “Sometimes, we lie to protect people. I lied, to protect you, along with many other people. Myself included, of course,” he starts.

“I was sent here with the sole purpose of bringing in your criminal neighbour,” he pauses “and I did.” You nod along with his words, your mind only allowing the most important phrases to sink in. “I arrested him around a month ago, and I was supposed to leave three weeks ago,” he sadly sighs. You look up in a panic, and you’re in shock. “Two weeks ago, I turned in my resignation. I’m not going anywhere,” he quickly adds and your face lights up.

“I’m staying with my best girl, okay?” Chris smiles and leans in to kiss you. You let him do so because God-damn, you’d let him do anything he wants to you. “T- Thank you so much, Daddy!” you squeal and hug him tightly. He laughs in a beautiful cacophony of sounds, and it’s right in your ear.

Chris feels a weight being lifted off his shoulders as you writhe around in his arms. You wiggle around on his hard cock and Chris suppresses a groan. His hands trail from your shoulders to your waist, down to your hips. Goosebumps erupt on your skin and excitement runs in your veins at his touch. Your head rolls back and you exhale shakily. He grips your hips tightly, and you involuntarily buck your hips against his crotch.

Both you and Chris moan before he moves both his hands to your ass. He gropes you roughly, feeling a bit of your wetness on his fingers. “Oh, baby… What’s all that for? Hm? Didn’t Daddy just eat your sweet little pussy out?” he asks in a slightly worried tone. “Y- Yeah… But I can’t help it, Daddy, you always make me so tingly…” you admit to him, shyly.

“Mmm, I like knowing I do this to you. Gets me so fucking hard,” he groans, slapping your ass. You yelp in surprise, but it gets cut off by a whimper. Chris caresses the hit skin and soothes you down from the shock. He smiles at you and then lands another hit. Then another, and then another.

The sting is addictive, just like he is. It leaves you writhing in both pain and pleasure and yet you still want more. “M- more, please,” you quietly beg and Chris coos at you as if you're a pet. And the truth isn’t far off. The coolness of his rings is both brutal and comforting. It soothes you yet acts as if they didn’t just hurt you. “You want more, baby?” he asks in that sweet yet sultry condescending tone of his.

You nod your head and chew on your bottom lip. “‘S too bad you’re gonna have to take what I give you and keep quiet, baby,” he husks, and you whine loudly. Chris flips your bodies around and suddenly you’re on your back, and he’s leaning over you. He locks lips with you and you try your hardest to keep up with the kiss.

His lips move sloppily against yours, but you don’t mind because you’ll take anything he gives you. You moan into true kiss and Chris wedges his knee between your legs. You’d hump him like a bunny because that’s what the demon on your shoulder is telling you to do. But the last time you did something without his permission, you weren’t allowed to make him come for a week.

You just know you’re soaking his jeans but neither of you cares. Chris kisses the corner of your mouth and trails down to your neck, peppering kisses behind as if he’s leaving a trail on your body for when he’s going to explore you later. The stubble on his cheeks and jaw tickles you and Chris falls even more in love with you as your laughter fills the air.

“D- Dada…” you whisper to him as you tilt your head back. His lips land on that sweet spot of yours and your back arches off the couch. Chris smiles against your skin and begins to suck on that sweet spot. Your breath hitches as he bites, licks and sucks on your skin. He marks you up like no other, and you know how much he loves to know that you’re all his.

“Dada… No teasing, please,” you sweetly ask in your soft tone. And how can he turn you down? “In a bit, little girl, be patient for Daddy.” Chris continues to mark you up until he’s satisfied. The feeling of his teeth against your neck and collar bones makes you even wetter than you already are. Possessiveness is carried in his movements, and it only drives you to be needier.

Chris moves further down from your collar bones to the valley of your breasts. Each curve of yours makes him want to sin without any repentance afterwards. He places a kiss there and then looks up at you. “Please, Daddy,” you whisper so quietly it takes him a few seconds to realize what you’ve said. Chris’s hand wraps around your body to your back.

He slowly unclasps your bralette and drags it away from your body at the same pace. You both maintain eye contact all whilst he undresses you to your vulnerability. Chris throws your bra somewhere behind him and places his hands on your body. “Aw, baby… You’re so cute and small,” he sweetly says in an almost shocking manner. Almost as if he doesn't use the size difference as a weapon to make you all soft and mushy.

“Hm, thank you, Daddy,” you tell him because good girls always have manners. “So good, using your manners for Daddy,” he praises, and you wonder if he can read your mind. Your Daddy can do anything, so it would be no surprise if he can. Chris sits upon his knees, but he remains in his towering position. Gently, and with care, he spreads your legs open until he’s satisfied.

He watches as you clench your needy pussy. He just knows your clit is throbbing, and you’re tingly because he just has that effect on you. “Poor baby… Is this all for Daddy?” he asks, and you quickly nod. “Say it, tell me it’s all because of me,” he growls placing his hands on your thighs. Chris slowly moves his hands further down your thighs. His touch is gentle, and he can feel the goosebumps on your thighs beginning to raise.

“‘S all yours, daddy. It’s all because of you,” you tell him breathlessly. “And this pussy is all mine, isn’t it, little girl?” he asks, inching closer to your wet pussy. “Mhm, only yours, Daddy!” you happily assure him, and he smirks at you. “That’s right, little girl. And since it’s all mine, doesn’t that mean I can do whatever I want with it?” he questions, and you nod with no hesitance at all.

Chris traces your wet pussy with his ring-donned pointer finger. “Oh my…” you gasp at the feeling. It may not be much, but your sensitive little pussy struggles to handle it. You clench around nothing again, and he watches, before chuckling at you. “Such a pretty pussy you have, baby, I can’t fucking wait to ruin it,” Chris growls, and you whimper. “Gonna fill you up with my cum after I fuck you, little girl,” he promises, and you never wanted to be fucked so badly until now.

He wonders if his cock could even fit inside you. Usually, he’d want to eat you out and finger you to prepare you. But he’s now thinking with what’s between his legs, and not what’s between his ears. He trails that same pointer finger on your pussy, and becomes mesmerized with the sight. Chris watches as your hole drools with want and need, whilst you watch him.

His already dark eyes are blown out with lust, and it only turns you on even more. Chris knows you’re watching him. He’s not one of the best agents in the FBI for no reason. He looks up at you, and you lock eyes with each other. He smirks and pulls his hand away from your pussy. You hold back a whine, but you still pout in disappointment. Chris begins to unbuckle his pants, and you’re filled with eagerness.

You smile widely, and he coos. “Aw, you’re such a desperate little slut, it’s adorable,” he chuckles, and you shy away. He pulls down his jeans along with his boxers slowly. Chris takes off his jeans and boxers completely, and throws them somewhere around the house. You watch as his cock bounces up and leaks with pre-cum. You just know he’s aching because of how red his cock is.

He’s big, and you already know that. But seeing him in all his naked glory is just something else. The simple yet not so simple idea of Chris’s cock being inside of you is electrifying. It’s both terrifying and exciting. He grabs the base of his cock and the prickly hair pokes the soft skin of his hands, but he doesn’t care. His left hand goes back to your pussy, and begins to rub circles on your clit.

“Oh… Daddy,” you moan quietly. The pleasure is almost overwhelming, so you involuntarily try to shut your legs and keep Chris out. Your knees touch for a brief moment, and he’s having none of that. He separates your legs and climbs on top of you, all while staring you directly in the eyes. His cock drags against your inner thigh. “Oh, is it too much for you, little one?” he asks with faux pity in his tone. You nod and clench your fists to control yourself.

“Too fucking bad, you’re gonna take whatever I give you, and you’re not gonna complain. Isn’t that right, little girl?” he sneers, and you gasp. Usually, you can’t handle someone who raises their voice in the slightest. But hearing Chris do it makes the butterflies in your stomach fly. “Yes, Daddy,” you hum delightfully, and he smiles. “Good girl,” he praises. Chris presses harder on your sensitive pearl of nerves and rubs you in faster circles.

“Daddy…” You moan and it goes straight to his cock. He looks up at you and just knows you’re beginning to drive up that cliff. He slows down his ministrations on your nub, and you bite back a loud whine. “You’re so needy, baby… Already so close to coming, it’s kind of pathetic…” he trails off and more wetness leaks out of you. You’re absolutely soaked and are a little bit ashamed of it.

“Please, Daddy! I’m so close, I’ll do anything,” you beg, but he just doesn’t buy it. “You’ll already do anything I tell you, baby, begging is so useless,” Chris chortles. You let out a small huff and move your hips in a circle, grinding against his thumb. In a flash of blurry moments, Chris pulls his hand away from your pussy and wraps around your neck. He squeezes the sides of your throat, and you gasp quite loudly.

He raises his eyebrow in warning, and you nod in understanding. “Good girl, I don’t want to put you over my knee when I’m feeling so gracious,” he assures, and you smile. Chris brings the tip of his cock to your swollen, needy clit and his pre-cum begins to mix with your wetness. You both moan softly as he rubs his tip on your clit. Your bottom lip finds a home between your teeth and Chris’s tongue swipes over his.

The sight and feeling of his cock on your silky pussy make him so weak in the knees. “Fuck, baby, do you like that? You like it when Daddy makes you feel good with his cock?” Chris asks in a deep, gravelly voice. “Yeah, Daddy… love it so much…” you tell him through a mushy haze of pleasure.

“You’re getting all dumb and stupid already? You’re so cute, little one,” he purrs, and you giggle at his words even though there’s nothing funny about them. “Do you want my cock, little baby? Say it, tell Daddy you want his cock,” he urges, and you look down to where you’re both nearly connected.

“I wan’ your cock, Daddy. Want it so bad, I need it, Daddy,” you beg, and Chris hums. “Just a little more, little girl, it’s like music to my ears,” he smirks, and you bite your bottom lip. “Sing for me, hummingbird,” he pushes, and you just go with whatever your neediness tells you to do.

“I wanna feel your cock deep inside me, Daddy. I want your cum to fill me up until I’m leaking and all stupid. Please, Daddy, please fuck me. I really want your cock, I need it,” you beg and blood rushes to his face and cock. “Fuck, yeah, I’ll give you my fucking cock, and you better take it like the good girl you are,” he growls, and you whimper. Chris slowly drags the fat tip of his shaft down to your drooling, slutty hole.

You whimper loudly, and he looks back at you. Fear is written all over that pretty face of yours, and Chris knows the exact reason why. “Don’t worry, baby, I’ll be gentle, okay? If you want to stop just say so, and I’ll listen. I won’t hurt you, darling. I promise,” he gently reassures you. You sigh with an almost heavy yet full heart.

You then nod and Chris thanks you for allowing him to fully make you his. “Wanna hold your hand, Dada… Please,” you ask pleasantly, and he nods. “In a bit, little girl, I just need to be careful,” he whispers. Chris slowly begins to push into your wet, tight cunt. You swallow him slowly, and the sight is mesmerizing.

The tightness of your cunt squeezes him in a strong hug, and he wishes he could be buried deep inside you for the rest of his life. “Fuck- Baby, you feeling so fucking good,” he moans while trying to compose himself. You’re still whimpering from the pain, and your chest is rising and falling at a fast pace.

“C- Can I push all the way in, little one? It’ll only hurt for a bit,” he asks, and he looks deep into your eyes. “Mhm… Wanna feel your cock deep inside me, Daddy, please,” you beg, and Chris tries his hardest not to come right here, right now. He thrusts his hips forward, and bottoms out inside you completely.

Your mouth falls open, and you’re silently screaming. The pain isn’t too much, but you feel as though the wind is being knocked out of you. Chris shifts a bit, and that’s when you start to feel it more. He’s so deep inside you, and he’s splitting you in two. “Breathe, baby, breathe,” he says.

You realize you’re holding your breath and it’s no wonder why your heart was beating out of your chest. “You’re doing so- so well, darling. Your little cunny looks so nice when it’s stuffed full with my cock,” he groans, and you whimper. “Dada, is hurtin’...” you whisper, and Chris wants to pull out because he can’t stand the thought of his little girl being hurt.

“Do you want me to stop, little one?” he asks, but you quickly shake your head in objection. Even though the pressure in your core is dwindling, and even though you feel a little too full, you don’t want him to stop. “No stopping, Daddy, please,” you whine and flail your arms towards him. He shushes you soothingly, and you calm down as soon as he flashes a stern look.

The pain soon burns away into nothing but dust and ash, and you finally see why he was so desperate to shove his cock inside of your cunt. It turns into pleasure and your pussy leaks around him. You’re soaking Chris’s cock with no shame at all. “Oh, fuck, baby… You feel so fucking good,” he moans, and you follow with a gasp. “I like the way y- you feel inside me, Daddy, makes me all tingly…” you admit shyly, and Chris chuckles.

“Yeah? Bet it makes you want to be fucked stupid, right, baby?” he questions with a playful smirk on his face. “Yes, Daddy,” you moan. You’re never aware of your surroundings because you’re too caught up in the moments. It’s something Chris scolds you for, but you never learn. But in this moment, you can feel everything. The veins on his cock throb against your silky walls, and you can feel his balls against your ass. His hot breath fans over you as Chris struggles to compose himself.

He slowly drags his hips backwards, pulling out of your pussy until his tip is the only thing in your cunt. The sudden almost-emptiness is surprising, but you quickly get used to it. Chris then pushes back into your pussy, and you moan loudly. “Fucking hell, little one,” he curses under his breath as he bottoms out again. He begins to fuck into you slowly and gently, careful to not hurt you. Even if he wants to fuck you until you’re crying.

The sound of skin on skin is quiet and almost unintelligible. The squelching sounds from your wet pussy and moans fill the room. Chris gently grips your hips and watches as your face contorts into a frown of pleasure and not pain. “Daddy…” you pant softly as you look up at Chris. “Yeah, baby? Am I hurting you?” he asks out of worry. “N-No, it feels so good…” you trail off as one particular thrust lands near your g-spot. And he knows that.

“Wan’ you to fuck me hard, wan’ you to destroy me, Daddy. Please fuck me like the slut I am…” you gently beg and Chris halts his thrusts. His cock twitches inside of you because of your words. Only he can corrupt an innocent angel such as yourself. “Shit- Little one, I don’t want to hurt you, that’s why I’m being so gentle,” Chris explains, but you shake your head. “You could never hurt me, Daddy. Please, I need you,” you beg for one last time, unaware of what you’ve done to him.

Chris roughly pushes his cock back into your cunt without warning. “Awe, I see. My little princess wants to be fucked like the whore she is, hm? Well, whatever princess wants, she gets,” he growls because beginning to fuck you roughly. You moan loudly at the feeling as with each thrust, his cock pummels against your sweet spot roughly. His pelvic bone rubs against your swollen clit and his grip on your hips tightens.

“Daddy!” you cry out as Chris pounds into your poor pussy. The room fills with moans, groans, curse words and wet sounds that all come from the art you two are making. “Aw, what’s wrong, little girl? Can’t take daddy’s cock anymore? Hm? Well, I don’t really give a fuck, you’re just gonna lie there, and take what I give you like a good fucking girl,” he sneers, and you push at his chest.

“It’s so sensitive!” you wail like a little bitch in heat. “But I bet you don’t want me to stop, do you?” Chris asks as a moan bleeds past his plump lips. “Uh-uh, please don’t stop, Daddy!” you squeal after a harsh thrust. The stretch of Chris’s cock is amazing, and you never want the feeling to stop. Chris’s hand leaves your hip and crawls all the way up to your neck. He wraps his fingers around your throat, and squeezes the sides, making you clench tightly around his big, thick cock.

He lowers his face to yours and watches as you react to the way he’s being rough with you. “Oh, God!” you cry out as he makes his thrusts more powerful. “Actually, it’s just ‘Daddy’, but I’m fine with that too,” he slyly smirks. You’re too fucked out to even laugh at his joke. Your eyes roll back into your skull and your back begins to arch off of the couch. “Awe, are you gonna come around my big fat cock already, slut? How cute,” Chris mocks.

You nod your head and begin babbling like a baby. “But remember, little girl, I have to give you permission to come, okay?” he reminds you, and you whine. Chris’s hand around your throat moves up to grab your jaw, and he stops thrusting into you. “None of that is allowed. Don’t forget your place, little girl,” Chris warns with fury seething through his words. You mumble an apology, trying to formulate the proper words to speak.

“Seems like I really did fuck you stupid,” he chuckles, and you moan at his words. You clamp down on his cock, tempting him to do what you want, like a siren using her voice to lure men into the sea. “Open your mouth up first, little girl,” he orders, and you obediently listen. The searing arousal in your core begins to fade away, and you feel a panic beginning to rise inside you.

Chris drags his hand back down to your throat and rests it there. You watch as he puckers his lips up, and suddenly, he spits into your mouth. You open your mouth even wider and stretch your tongue out. His saliva lands directly on your tongue, and you wait for further instructions before you give in to your desires.

“Swallow it, little girl,” he instructs, and you do exactly so. You open your mouth back up just to earn some praise. “Good fucking girl. The best baby ever,” he smiles and presses a kiss to your forehead. “Thank you, Daddy! … Can I have cummies now?” you lovingly ask your Daddy.

“Of course, little one,” he says as he smiles down at you. Chris begins to fuck into you again, deep and hard. With each thrust, he pounds your g-spot and his balls slap against your ass. His remaining hand on your hip moves down to your clit, rubbing your little button with rough circles.

“Daddy… ‘m gonna come!” you moan loudly and Chris fucks you harder. “Come one, baby, come all over my big cock like the good girl you are,” he urges. The building feeling inside you increases, and you feel yourself getting closer to your release. “Fucking come, little girl, wanna hear you sing for me,” he growls. And with one specific thrust, you find yourself coming undone beneath him.

The sight is so fucking beautiful. Watching you as your eyes turn up, your mouth falls open and your cunt hugging his cock just gets him going, and he wishes he could take a picture of you right now. “D- Daddy! Oh, my-” You cut yourself off with a loud moan and Chris keeps on rubbing your clit and fucking you through your orgasm.

You soak his cock until it’s dripping and even then you’re still coming. You moan loudly and Chris can feel himself getting closer to his orgasm. His balls begin to tighten up and a droplet of sweat drips from his neck down to his chest. “Daddy, are you gonna come?” you sweetly ask as he fucks you through your orgasm whilst chasing his own.

“Yeah, baby, Daddy’s gonna fill you up with his cum. I’m gonna leave you leaking with my seed,” Chris growls as he fucks you faster. “Please, Daddy… Please, I want your cum so badly! Please fill me up with your cum, Daddy,” you beg and Chris tosses his head back.

“Fuck, yes, yes yes,” he shouts as his balls tighten up again. He quickens his pace until white, hot, thick ropes of cum spurts out from his aching tip. He fulfills his promise and your wish, filling you up with his cum until there’s nothing left. His cum mixes with your juices as he paints your walls with no expertise whatsoever. Chris slumps on top of your body, engulfing you in a bear hug as his cock remains buried inside of you.

You’re both panting and struggling to come down from the euphoric feelings. You look up at Chris make lock eyes with him for the nth time. There’ll never be a day where you don’t get lost in his eyes. They’re beautiful, absolutely beautiful. “You did so fucking good, little one,” he praises, pressing a kiss to the side of your head.

“Thank you very, very much, Daddy,” you slur, feeling yourself beginning to sleep into little space. “Daddy?” you call out, tapping his bicep after a few seconds. “Yeah, baby?” he asks, lifting himself up to get a better view of your face. “Will you really stay?” you ask with a bit of worry in your voice. He sighs with a full heart.

“Always.”

2K notes · View notes

moonctzeny · 4 years ago

Text

Promotion

This is technically a part 2 of my fic Work for it but it can be enjoyed on its own!

pairing: supervisor !johnny x intern ! female reader x assistant !haechan

genre: smutty goodness (this will send me to hell vip)

word count: almost 14k

summary: “After you fuck the Sales’ department supervisor, Johnny Suh in your office during an overtime, you’re left to deal with the unavoidable lingering emotions that come with getting his dick on the regular. At the same time, his assistant and your best work buddy, Donghyuck, who initially helped you with getting with his boss, realises his growing crush on you that is too big to be ignored at this point. With their masterful skills in seduction, you’ve ended up tangled in a sexual game with the both of them, all the while trying to move up from an intern to a permanent worker in the company”

warnings: threesome w/ two doms, alcohol consumption, mention of food (meat, lettuce, eggs), oral, overstimulation, thigh job, at some point- reader borrows a shirt from haechan and it’s mentioned that it’s ‘too big on the shoulders’, thigh riding, office sex, pussy slapping, choking, fingering, sir kink thrown in there at some point, a little degradation bc this is my fic we’re talking about

a/n: omg it’s finally done! I really love this so I hope you guys like it as well :)

taglist: @rainodanna, @markresonates, @unknown5tar, @yoongsicles

For every other worker in the office, virtually nothing had changed.

They relive the same mundane routine, Monday after Monday, the same excruciating 8 hours and short cigarette breaks. The same trees, stuck in their ceramic imprisonment would greet them in the company’s entrance. Rigid and dusty and reeking of cheap plastic. It’s not like they’d come alive, open their little mouths on their thylakoid membranes and tell everyone you fucked mr. Suh, the Sales Department’s supervisor, in your office during your overtime. No, that’s not possible, you reminded yourself when you pass by them every morning, giving them a side eye for good measure, as if that would scare them off their zombie state.

And you were the same too, completing your tasks and meeting your deadlines. Blending in with the rest of the company’s human resource, with the exception of the occasional double take of some tactless male worker here and there.

Donghyuck, however, said supervisor’s assistant and your best friend, wasn’t your typical office worker. He noticed the extra layer of cherry lip gloss coating your lips. He noticed your new perfume, sweeter than the one you used to wear. He noticed the knowing smiles between you and his boss, the heat of your body when you were around him. And it wasn’t just because he was sharp overall.

He was the one who practically got you together, planted the seed in Johnny’s head about the cute new intern of the Financial Department. He was the one who convinced him to finally make a move on you, tired of seeing you trying over and over again to seduce the supervisor to your bed.

And when that seed finally sprouted, in the form of Johnny spitting in your mouth and taking you on your office chair like you were his last fuck on earth (according to the hair-raising description you gave Donghyuck the morning after), he should’ve been happy, right?

It didn’t really affect his life in the slightest.

You were just y/n. His friend, his work buddy. The person whom he was close enough to let you know you had a piece of lettuce stuck on your teeth from that sandwich you had on your break. The person who texted him funny gifs of pandas falling asleep during the most boring of meetings. With your nerdy glasses and that ugly brown suit you loved wearing so much. The person he dreamt of fucking every time he fell asleep.

When you told Donghyuck you had a crush on his boss he wasn’t shocked, but the stinging buzz in his guts surprised him. He would see you waltz right past his office all perked up and pretty, to see the person you really came for, nervous as you hung from every word that left Johnny’s mouth. He’d put up with the sound of you giggling over every stupid joke that left the older man’s mouth patiently, just to wait until he’d smell your sweet perfume as you’d walk past him again. To tease you over something that would make you mad enough to notice him, glare at him, maybe even hit him.

And Donghyuck wanted to hate Johnny, he really did. His stupid boss who asked for his coffee specifically made, who was rude and cranky on Monday mornings and got the credit for all his hard work, yet Johnny was nothing of the sort. He was helpful, and kind and let him off early. He was funny and good looking and taller than him and had a six pack, damn it. If Donghyuck was being honest, he didn’t just like his boss, he admired him. It was pathetic, he thought. Most days he’d live vicariously through him.

Sometimes he would lay on his bed at night, picturing himself to be the second lead of a romance drama that would sweep you off your feet. Everyone gets second lead fever, right? In his rem cycles, he’s handsome and hilarious and much more interesting than the main actor. He would imagine himself stretching out his rays, like the full, rising sun that he was, until they overcame the big mountain that was Johnny and reached your skin. So hot against it that you’d have to undress, remove the clothes sticking on your sweaty skin to embrace him.

He thought about your body a hundred times too many for it to be considered healthy. The curve of your ass in your pencil skirts, the little hairs on the nape of your neck that stuck out from your tight ponytails. The runs on your tights that he wished were caused by the sharpness of his fingernails. He listened to your voice carefully, all 90 Hz of it, and played it inside his head as if it was an instrument. Putting together chords and harmonies, composing a music piece of all the ways his name would sound like coming out of your lips.

Donghyuck, Donghyuck, Donghyuck

“Earth to Donghyuck? Are you listening to me?”

It was unlike him to be out of it, especially when he was around you. He blames it on skipping coffee this morning or the shade of red of your blouse that fits you so well. Either way, he had to respond, and keep the pink from flooding his cheeks further. There’s no way you could’ve known what was going on inside his head.

“Uh, yeah, yeah. So, let me get this straight. Weren’t you the one who didn’t want a relationship?”

You were upset, he could tell. After the night of the overtime, you and Johnny had indulged in a few more nights of each other’s presence, but had kept it at that. Sex. Delicious, mind blowing, porno worthy sex, but nothing more than that. And you were starting to itch for a little bit more.

Donghyuck was right, of course. You were the one who told Johnny that this wasn’t the right time in your life for any sort of commitment, especially with someone in the workplace. This was your internship, and you were determined to get a permanent position soon, that should be your first priority. Get the bag and go. There were men everywhere. But why was your heart aching for that particular one with the long hair and the caramel eyes and the flower tattoos?

“I just don’t want people at work to gossip about us, you know how they get. But seeing him so nonchalant about it gets on my nerves.”

Leaving his apartment at 2 am when he was sprawled out on his bed, in just pyjama pants and the light layer of sweat from the athletic sex you just had, hurt enough. It was a sight so beautifully hidden under his work attire that it soon became addictive, the withdrawal symptoms too intense for you to have your dose only once a week.

Donghyuck scowled when you first let out a frustrated sigh, your eyes pitifully following his boss’s silhouette around. He knew you’d never really complain about it, you were set on that promotion and you deserved it too, but it was hard not to get angry. Everything he ever wanted stood willing and ready for taking in front of Johnny’s lap, how could he not claim you?

He hated seeing you sad.

“Let’s go for a drink. I think you need it.”

Even he surprised himself with the sudden proposition, blinking back at you to gauge your reaction. You were best work buddies, sure, but you never hung out after office hours alone. It would make sense for you to refuse, Donghyuck told himself, trying to soften the blow of a potential rejection. You’re probably tired from working, or maybe you’d feel awkward to be alone with him for so long. Maybe you hated to drink, or maybe you hated him. Oh God, what if you hated him? What if you only spent time with him out of social obligat-

“Sure, sounds good. Pick me up after you’re done? Since you’re on the top floor.”

Donghyuck nodded back at you, too eagerly for his liking, the gears in his brain already trying to figure out where he should take you. You excused yourself back to your office, the small pat you gave his shoulder making him grin like an idiot.

This is not a date, he reminded himself.

He had dreamt of this moment for months now. He thought about you every time he walked past that korean bbq place, promising himself that one day he’d muster the courage to finally ask you out. This wasn’t exactly the case today, but it was as close to his imagination as possible. This is not a date.

He repeated that phrase over and over again, let it resonate inside his head. This is not a date because he is a coward and you like someone else. Was he a bad person for taking you out today? Was he taking advantage of your slight disappointment? Was that why you ever said yes in the first place? The self deprecating thoughts lit a fire in his belly and he tried to extinguish it with every shot of clear liquid that disappeared from between his full lips. Like he expected, you weren’t far behind on the drinking either, enjoying the grilled pieces of meat blissfully, moaning in satisfaction with every delicious bite.

You looked pretty before, but now, through the pink coloured glasses of intoxication, you were stunning. There was a halo of bright light surrounding you, making you look so celestial chomping on that piece of lettuce. If it was anyone else, he would pull a face of repugnance at the sight, yet Dongyuck thought that you just looked so cute, so content in that little moment and he wished he could just lean in and leave a kiss over your filled cheeks.

No, that was a dangerous thought. This is not a date, pull it together.

Donghyuck desperately tried to focus his attention somewhere else, anywhere but you would suffice. His eyes finally landed on a bowl of marinated eggs on the table, and it reminded him of the three boiled eggs he makes for breakfast every morning. He was a man of habit, following the same routine until he’d see you and you’d colour between the lines of his life, making it interesting finally. Donghyuck would fill the pot with more water than needed, just enough so that it doesn’t overflow. He liked to be closer to you than he could handle, close enough but never touching you.

Lost in his daydream, he doesn’t realise that he hasn’t talked in minutes. And when you touch his hand lightly with yours to bring him out of it, he almost feels the boiling water burning his skin.

“You’re so quiet”, you say with a chuckle, and Donghyuck makes a mental note to add this harmony to his composition, “you got drunk before I did? Are you really Lee Donghyuck?”

“Well see, I drank all this soju, so I wish I was someone else for the night.”

The statement saddened you, and you withered a little in your seat. Why did Donghyuck drink so much tonight? You came here for you to cheer up, didn’t you? Or were you so caught up in your little personal drama - that you caused yourself - that you missed hearing about his cat dying? You must offer your condolences. Did he even have a cat?

You don’t want to bring up his dead cat in case he did so you just lift your hand next to his head, and weave your fingers through his locks. He has been growing out his hair for months now, and the look might not be the most corporate-professional but it sure fit him. The ash blonde shade that he decided to colour it, brought out the tan of his skin nicely, and the hair itself though bleached was still soft to the touch.

You see him react to the work of your fingers instantly, his expression shocking you. His mouth is hanging open in a loose ‘O’ shape, small wrinkles forming on the space between his eyebrows. You pick out small pieces of hair, one by one, letting gravity do the rest by allowing the individual hairs to return to their previous state.

“What are you thinking about?”, you ask so softly it’s almost a whisper, and Donghyuck can only sigh.

YOU, he wants to scream, you’re in my mind all day long and I think I’m going crazy! He is full on staring at you now and there’s nothing in the world that can take his eyes off of you, off your worried eyes that seem to hold all the stars in the sky, or the soft skin of your neck that he wants to kiss and suck and break so badly. But he doesn’t, and the soju calls him a coward for it, so he settles for the next best thing.

“You are pretty”

It was just three words but they sent your mind in a frenzy. Why did it matter so much to you that Donghyuck found you pleasing to look at? He has complimented you before, even flirted with you a lot of times, yet it was always said half-jokingly, followed by a diss. But this time he was serious, no signs of alcohol clouding his eyes. He was so solemn in fact, that those three words made the heat burn on the skin of your cheeks, rising up your throat and hindering you from responding with a human sound.

He takes one more shot, washing away the embarrassment of his sudden confession and offers to order one more fatty dish to sober up, then take a walk in the city.

The walk was relatively quiet, less awkward than it was 30 minutes ago but Donghyuck was still being uncharacteristically silent.

“I thought you said that alcohol doesn’t make you red”, you say teasingly, trying to spark conversation.

It doesn’t actually. You were the culprit of the wash of burgundy all over his skin, accumulating even more pigmented around his ears and the freckles of his nose. You were walking side by side now, and Donghyuck thought that for the passersby you two must look like lovers. He let his brain entertain that fantasy, his hand itching to hold yours. He’d intertwine your fingers together, give your palm a little rub with his thumb. Then he’d lift the bundle of fingers on his lips, kiss the thin skin of your wrist and make the aunties that are looking at you now coo in adoration.

“Says you. You look so fucked right now.”, he jokes and you’re relieved to see him go back to his teasing self. You don’t know if it’s the chilly night, but you’re overly aware of the heat his body emits, and the smell of his cologne makes your head spin just a bit more. You’ve been sitting so close to him this entire time that you can list off most, if not all, the ingredients in his perfume. Rose, chilly pepper, orange blossom, lavender.

“Donghyuck, I will step on you.”

“Mmm, tempting”

You shove his arm playfully and he reciprocates, but his strength is not as controlled as he thinks. The heels of your boots, slippery against the wet floor that the drizzle caused earlier, make you trip on your steps, and Hyuck is luckily there. With his quick reflexes he catches your elbows first, pulling you up against his chest and you grab his left bicep to support your weight.

You take a deep breath, to register that you did not fall head first on the floor, and that’s when you realise how close Donghyuck is to you. His bangs are tickling your forehead, your deep pants fanning them apart. You admire his glowing skin, the wrinkles of his lips, the two moles lined parallelly with the bridge of his nose. You’re not sure what comes to you, but you raise your free hand and place it over his hot cheek, your thumb connecting those two moles with an invisible line. A raindrop, fresh out of the sky and signifying the start of a new drizzle, falls on his face and follows the trail that a tear would, his voice weak and breaking when he speaks again.

“I’m sorry”

He dips down his head then, connecting your lips and letting the plumpness of his mouth reel you in. You’re over the initial shock almost immediately and kiss him back in vigor, surprised with the heat his kiss has spread to your chest and belly. It was an ember at first, glowing in the very depth of your insides but it was soon starting to spark up uncontrollably, and you were scared of how rapidly it was fueling up. This was your friend you were kissing. So where did all this hunger for him come from?

You pull back when you realise you’re in a road full of people, and you can’t bring yourself to look at him in the eyes. Donghyuck looks disheveled and anxious, and he apologizes again before he urges you to keep walking with him.

“It’s starting to rain. We should get home.”

You walk next to him in complete silence now, stealing quick glances of his reflexion at every surface that made it possible - the windows of the parked cars, the puddles of water on the sidewalk, a passersby’s glasses. The look on his face is unreadable, pensive if anything else, and it’s rare for the expressive Donghyuck you’re used to dealing with. Your homes are towards the same direction, his a little closer than yours, and it doesn’t take too long for you to reach the entrance of his building, your clothes not even half wet from walking without umbrellas.

Donghyuck fumbles to find his keys, his hands shaking from the adrenaline his body released from the kiss earlier, the feeling still too fresh against his lips. He stresses thinking of what to do next. Should he hug you goodnight? Apologize again for kissing you? Unlock the entrance without a word and never speak to you again?

“I’m here”, he states dumbly, as if you’d sit at the porch of a strange house and he avoids your eyes as if you were Medusa, “Goodnight.”

You smile back awkwardly at him, waving with a hand made of clay as you wish him the same. He has turned around to unlock the door, key already at the keyhole and you turn to leave too when his voice stills you in place.

“He’s an idiot.” His back is still facing you, and when he turns to look at you his eyes finally lock with yours, as honest and earnest as ever. “Johnny. If it were me, hell, if you wanted me like that I would grab that opportunity- grab you in an instant, convince you to be mine any way I could.”

You’re stuck looking at him like a fool, trying to comprehend what he’s saying and the complications of it. He puffs out through his nose, chuckling to himself and shaking his head.

“It doesn’t matter. Goodnight y/n.”

Donghyuck is half inside the entrance now and your body suddenly exits its frozen state, blocking the door from closing with your boot. He’s shocked with the sudden movement and he opens up the door further for you. You get inside the little hall without thinking, sitting firmly in front of him, a puzzled look on his face.

“What if I told you he hasn’t even crossed my mind this whole time we were out? What if I told you I haven’t stopped thinking about you since you kissed me? Would it matter then?”

He opens his mouth momentarily, as if to speak but decides to stay silent. He already said everything he needed. It’s up to you now.

And you aren’t ready to leave yet.

You take a step forward to close the distance between you, your chests touching and you pick up the distinct smell of soju in his breath. You’re not sure if it’s that smell or the proximity but you feel drunk all over again, the yellow light of the hall shining disturbingly bright down at you and urging you to do something.

You plant a kiss over his neck, leaving a trace of the remnants of the pink lipstick you applied at the start of the workday. It was tentative, but you could still feel his raging pulse from under your lips. You could feel it get faster too, the rhythm going higher along with his body temperature and you decide on a path. A path of kisses starting from the same spot you’ve turned glittery pink, up his jawline and all the way to his earlobe.

Donghyuck clenches his jawline, you feel that too, and something snaps inside him. He just can’t take it anymore, having you so close to him, your lips on his neck and doing nothing about it. The boiling water finally spilled over the pot, hot and overflowing, and he doesn’t care if he gets burned.

You feel the cool wood against your back before you taste his tongue a second after. He has pushed you up against the entrance door, you realize, but it’s hard to comprehend anything around you when he kisses you like that. It’s the steamy, purposeful continuation of the kiss you shared earlier, and with the lack of prying eyes Donghyuck has a good idea of where he wants it to lead.

He shows you too, pushing his knee between your thighs and he feels your heat almost melt the rough fabric of his jeans. There are so many things he wants to do, so many lines he wants to cross but there is one thing he must ensure.

“Tell me you want this.”

You glide your hands upwards from his pecks to the slope of his neck and wrap them around his neck. Your body seems to act up on its own, and you feel yourself grinding down his leg that is still positioned against the wall. It feels dirty, the desperation of it all, and you connect your chest with his again before answering him.

“Lee Donghyuck. I want you to make me cum”

You grab his hand before he gets to respond, the cool silver of his watch digging against your fingers, and you drag him to the elevator door. As if the universe had sensed your urgency, you find it waiting for you at the bottom floor, and you pull him inside with a tug of his tie.

In no time you find yourself pushed up against the wall again, and you can’t see much beyond Donghyuck’s lips, but you do catch him clumsily pressing the button to his floor with your peripheral vision. Once the elevator is in motion you feel like you can finally submerge yourself in his lips and the way his kisses take your breath away, not sure if the funny feeling in your stomach is from the sudden change in altitude or the arousal. You’re already taking his clothes off, removing the jacket of his suit off his shoulders and working the top buttons of his shirt open.

It’s him that drags you to his apartment this time, urging you out of the elevator as soon as the robotic declaim of his floor number rips through the wet sounds of you kissing. His keys are already easily accessible in his front pocket from your conversation earlier, and when he manages to unlock the entrance with trembling hands you walk inside as if you own the place.

It’s small and cozy, decorated minimally. The first thing you notice is that it smells like Donghyuck, something that should be obvious but it still overwhelms you. It’s maybe a bit stuffy from the hours he was gone yet this is the smell still lingering in your nose from his skin you were sucking just moments ago, trying to distract him from the easy task of opening the door. It’s addictive and you want it stuck on yours.

And Donghyuck does stick on your skin, discarding his tie on the floor with a strong pull and finishing the task of unbuttoning his shirt that you started in the elevator. His movements are impatient and soon he’s half naked, and you barely have time to admire his caramel skin before his hands are all over you. They start safely at the dimples of your waist, then sliding upwards to your ribcage and copping a feel of the underside of your boobs by sneaking his thumbs under the wire of your bra. You want to feel more, encourage his probing fingers so you reach to the clasp on your back, unfastening the garment and removing it through the hem of your blouse.

Donghyuck can’t take his eyes off your chest, nipples hardened from your arousal and poking through the thin fabric. He takes his thumbs, the same thumbs that lit a fire in your belly earlier and flips the bud, toying it around and rubbing circles around it. The response from you is immediate, moans that start off soft and build up to a crescendo bouncing off the walls of his apartment.

It drives you crazy, a little bit, that smirk he has on his face now. It’s so familiar in between his features, you’ve seen it countless of times, especially during his typical teasings of you, yet is carries so much newfound weight now, so much sex appeal. He’s already giving you what you need but the climaxing is too slow for your liking, you want more and you want it now. You want what you asked him for in the lobby of this building.

Donghyuck can either read your mind or read through the increased frequency of your moans because he undresses down to his boxers, forming a trail of clothes from his living room to his bedroom, where he has led you. He doesn’t even bother to open the lights, relying on the moonlight from his window for lighting and pushing you down on his bedsheets.

He climbs up with you, hovering over you and you move back a bit so that your head rests comfortably over his pillows. If the smile he gave you earlier had affected you, then the hungry look on his face right now almost makes you come untouched, his eyes raking up and down your body as if he doesn’t know where to start.

He decides on your calves, kissing them and moving upwards slowly and sensually, not missing the sensitive skin on the side of your knees and paying extra attention to your inner thighs. He’s still at it a minute and a half later, and you can’t tell in the dark but you’re sure they must be decorated by bite marks by now, his close proximity to the source of your pleasure making you squirm in his hold.

It feels like ages since you last felt his fingers when he grips the soft meat of your thighs and spreads them apart. They soon move up to the hem of your skirt, rolling the fabric upwards and over your ass. You feel his breath against your pussy, making it tingle and twitch even more than it already has, and the wait feels like a new level of hell in Dante’s Inferno.

A single finger pets you over your underwear, drawing lines over the damp fabric from your clit down to your entrance and then up again. You whimper and whine at the sensation that is half a step from what you consider satisfactory and he hooks a finger on the black lace, moving it to the side and letting you experience the cool air of the room all over again. The full exposure brings heat to your face and you breathe through the embarrassment that arouses you even more.

“Hey, Donghyuck?”

“Yes?”

“Is your cat still alive?”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

He licks one long stripe over your entrance, and you feel the goosebumps spreading all over your arms and legs. Nimble fingers spread your folds apart, and you hold your breath as he lets his cool spit drip from his lips and land onto your lower ones, then starts sucking over your clit. His tongue is wet and his breath is hot, the combination driving you insane. You grip the comforter, digging into it with your nails to keep yourself grounded.

“Oh my god, yes, right there”

The praise motivates him to keep trying hard, not that it will take a lot of effort to make you come undone. Donghyuck’s unprecedented touches and the newfound sexual tension they have ignited had already worked you up, his skill in oral accelerating the build up to your climax even more. And just when you thought it couldn’t get better than this he starts a series of kitten licks right over your clit, each one sending a wave of pleasure stronger than the one before.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum”

You’re grinding on his face, trying to find the right pace when you finally come undone, thighs shaking and desperately trying to push his hands away to cover up your sensitivity again. His hold is steady and he continues to lick you keenly, the lewd sound of him slurping your wetness filling the room. Your eyes open wide and you can only stare at his white ceiling during your overstimulation, the cracks and crumbling plaster caused from humidity looking like constellations in your orgasm-drunk mind. The second climax hits you suddenly but forcefully, unable to control the volume of your voice, not that you can hear yourself clearly in your daze. It’s an array of moans and screams and tiny whimpers of Donghyuck’s name, his beautiful symphony coming to life.

His appetite for you is finally satiated, and he decides to take mercy on you and remove his lips from your pulsating heat. You look so beautiful right now, he thinks, skin illuminated by the pale moonlight that is reflected on the wetness dripping from your pussy. He hovers over you again, pulling you into another kiss and you lazily reciprocate. His member is painfully hard, sliding over your slickness. You squirm and yelp everytime the fabric of his underwear grazes against your clit, your nerve endings screaming in sensitivity.

“I don’t have a condom on me”, you whisper against his lips, the taste of yourself on his tongue engaging you in the kiss again.

“I’m too tired to fuck you like you deserve anyways”

It would be criminal from you to leave him untouched like that. He looks so hot over you, messy hair and chin glistening in your juices. You absentmindedly place your nails on his collarbones, then scratch your way down over his navel. Donghyuck hisses at the numb stinging of pain, hips buckling against your pussy in the pursuit of some sort of friction.

You move your hand even lower, slipping your fingers past the waistband of his boxers. You move past the bristles you find and grasp his member, that is not too long but an impressive girth. You manage to free it from his underwear, and you can’t really tell in the dim lighting but you bet it must have turned a purple-ish red colour. It’s leaking.

“But we don’t have a condom”

You take one of his hands in yours, giving it a kiss to calm him down, then place it over your left boob. He toys with the mound of your chest, squeezing the softness. You had other plans for him.

Connecting your knees together, you let the softness of your thighs connect, with only maybe a slither of space between them. Your hands are still on Donghyuck’s cock and you reach to hold his balls, massaging them slightly and pulling him towards you.

He takes your cue and leans forward, sliding himself between your thighs. The moan he lets out is guttural and elongated, laced with the beautiful metallic tone of his voice. He lets go of your breasts and wraps his arms around your knees, putting your calves on each of his shoulders and continues to rut his hips against you.

“Fuck. This feels so good”

You look up to see Donghyuck’s face, contorted in a frown that can only be described as desperate, his lips puffy and red from all the licking and kissing and sucking.

He looks painfully sexy, and you momentarily imagine all the things you would do to him if the serotonin of your double orgasm and the alcohol in your belly weren’t weighing you down. You’d gladly stay up all night for him, tugging on his long hair as you’d let him bend you in any position he wanted. You bet that thickness would feel amazing stretching you out and you moan at the thought, your thighs flexing involuntarily and making him moan even more.

Soon he has picked up his pace, the tip of his cock reappearing between your thighs more frequently and you can feel his thrusts getting sloppier by the second.

“Fuck fuck, I’m coming”

He suddenly pushes forward, almost collapsing on top of you as a string of satisfactory groans leave his lips. His hips still with a stagger and you entrancingly watch the ropes of white dripping from his cock and landing on your blouse. It was a mess, but you can worry about it in the morning.

Donghyuck fucks your thighs slowly for a little longer, elongating his pleasure for as long as he can and soothing the crescent moons his nails formed on your skin with his fingertips. He reaches one hand to his bedroom floor where he finds a -what you hope is- clean t-shirt, and pats his cum off your blouse as best as he could.

It has gotten late and you’re both exhausted, Donghyuck’s comfortable weight on top of you lulling you to sleep. He’s hugging your hips now, head resting on your stomach and occasionally kissing your hip bones tenderly. You’re not sure when you slip out of consciousness but you do hear Donghyuck mumble something against your skin, something the kiss of Morpheus doesn’t allow you to make out.

You wake up to a white ceiling. Not just any white ceiling- a cracked, full of moisture pockets ceiling and you wonder when you let the humidity mess up your apartment this much. The culprit of your awakening, the morning sun rays that shine right on your eyes; way too bright than what you’re used to, force your eyelids to open, and it takes you a moment to adjust to the abundant light. This isn’t your apartment.

The sight of a man that greets your barely recovered rentinas shocks you, and you rub your eyes just in case you’re stuck in a lucid dream or something. You see the mess of ash blonde hair and the pile of work clothes discarded on the floor and your mind soon is flooded with last night’s events, buzzed out in your foggy memory. You sense another buzz as well, a physical one this time and you wiggle in place when you feel something hard and metallic digging in your butt. You prod a little with your fingers, trying not to wake up Donghyuck too abruptly and you realise that yes, you’ve been sitting on a phone all night.

Shouldn’t it be a Tuesday today? It’s very bright for it to be that early but surely Donghyuck must have set an alarm for the both of you last night. You yawn involuntarily, deciding to play with your phone until he wakes up as well when the bright white display pulls all the blood from your face.

8:40. You have to be at work in 20 minutes.

“Donghyuck! Hyuck!”

You didn’t care to make your touches light. They were shoves, really, pushing at his shoulders frantically to get him off of you and pull him out of his slumber. He wakes up with a gasp, trying desperately to keep his balance and failing, to then fall unceremoniously on the floor.

“What the hell?”, he groans out with a hoarse, groggy version of his voice, “My head is pounding”

“It will hurt even more once I’m done with you! You didn’t set an alarm last night? Today’s a work day!’

With his eyes bulging, he launches himself forward, grabbing the phone from your hands.

“Shit, shit, shit”. He’s fully awake now, hands rubbing his face to come up with the next logical steps to take, in order to have you both at work on time and looking presentable. “I have a mouthwash and hairbrush in my bathroom, I’ll get ready here”

“And what the fuck am I supposed to wear?”

“Yesterday’s clothes? Are you really that concerned about recycling an outfit right now?”

You roll your eyes, pushing your blouse down and dragging his comforter off your body.

“Did you forget about this?”

You straighten out the fabric for him to see, and the big, grossly dried out cum stains aren’t hard to notice. His face looks worried, but not necessarily apologetic, and you can almost see the scenes from the sex you shared last night play through his eyes like a porn film.

“Your skirt is fine, right? I’ll find a shirt that fits you”

You’re spitting out the fluorescent blue liquid when he timorously walks in the bathroom to leave the piece of clothing he promised. It smells heavily of those moth-repellent sachets and looks slightly wrinkled, like something he pulled out from the depths of his closet but you don’t really have the privilege of playing Suzy Menkes right now. You pull and tuck the fabric in creative ways, in order to style the garment into something you might walk into work wearing one day, yet it’s painfully obvious to you how misfitted it is; too big around the shoulders as one would expect from a man’s shirt.

You exit the bathroom after giving up, pressed by the limited time and the sound of Donghyuck’s uneasy steps through the door. You let him freshen up as well and use the time to collect your things that are scattered all over his place - he was kind enough to bring you your bra that was discarded in his living room floor along with his shirt - and soon you were rushing out of his house and into separate cabs so as not to raise suspicion.

The rest of the day was normal, well- according to this new definition of normalcy for you. Where everything and everyone seems to follow this movie script of what a typical company must look like, while you worry that someone will probe uninvitedly into your thoughts. God knows what they would fish out. A broken record player of Donghyuck’s moans when he cums, the burn of his thick sex rubbing against your thighs, the paths of his neck veins you memorized by heart.

You shake your head to clear it from the intrusive thoughts, and click the refresh button of your emails. The sound of keys being tapped and printers being put to use lands you back to reality, and you calmly click on the new incoming message from the Sales Department.

It was Johnny.

You’d think that after having his dick down your throat for about half a minute, getting butterflies in your stomach from the mere sight of his email address would stop being a recurring event for you. But alas, here they were, tapping their little wings in a flutter that turns into a hurricane of anxiety, and you sarcastically thank the universe for having to deal with Johnny while looking like an 80’s librarian.

You walk up the stairs like your ankle’s dragging a ball and a chain, the piece of paper in your hands getting slightly ripped from the abuse of your nervous fingers. It was a stupid document, barely half filled with any valuable information and you think it can’t be worth the calories you burned with that trip. It certainly wasn’t worth entering hell, aka mr. Suh’s office, and just the thought of him waiting for you in his fitted suit and gelled back hair is making you light headed. If Johnny was Hades then Donghyuck definitely was Cerberus, guarding his boss with his three heads and his big dick.

You leave a breath out when you realise he isn’t there, making your way onto Johnny’s office with lighter feet. He smiles brightly when he sees you, handsome as ever, and you carefully leave the document on his messy desk.

“Well, isn’t it my favourite intern”

You laugh at his sing-song tone, enjoying how warm he was being today.

“You used to avoid me like the plague and now I’m your favourite?”

“You always were my favourite”, he winks, and pushes back his hair like he knows the effect it has on you, “If someone is avoiding anyone like the plague that’s Donghyuck. I would have sent him to you but I can’t find him anywhere.”

You gulp dryly at his words, an invisible awl pinching your chest. You could feel Donghyuck slipping away from every place that you might share, in a very subtle way, but still noticeable from you. He left the kitchen hastily when you walked in to make your coffee, excused himself out of the lunch break through which you always kept him company, and now he was gone as well. Was last night such a big mistake in his point of view?

“I’m kidding, I just wanted to see you.”

He motions you to come closer and you timidly oblige, serenaded by the sound of his voice but not missing the hunger his eyes hold. He’s still seated in his big leather office chair, thighs spread out in a way that turned you on embarrassingly much, and you fit yourself in the space between his long legs.

“He is very jumpy though, Donghyuck. Do you know what happened to him?”

Your whole body tenses up, muscles hardening defensively. “Why would I know?”

“I don’t know. It’s just that you guys are so close.”

Close. Close as in having his knee between your thighs, close as in being pushed up against his chest and the elevator mirror. Close as in knowing how his tongue feels massaging your clit.

“Have I seen you in that before?”

You’re confused with the sudden question and when you search for the context you realise he’s talking about your- Donghyuck’s shirt. Did he smell the sex on you? The overwhelming scent of pheromones and Donghyuck’s cologne that your nose just couldn’t ignore?

“I don’t think so”, you try to answer as nonchalantly as possible, “it’s new.”

“No”, Johnny insists, and pinches the fabric with his fingers. He’s very knowledgeable about fashion, always complimenting you on your outfit choices and you know he wouldn’t let this one go so easily. “I’m sure I’ve seen this before.”

You follow his line of sight towards the ivory fabric too, as if you expected there to be written “YOUR ASSISTANT GAVE ME THE BEST HEAD OF MY LIFE LAST NIGHT”, in a bright red marker. It was a prison, in the form of 99% cotton and 1% pure anxiety, and you know you had to distract Johnny out of this subject one way or the other.

“You like it?”, you ask seductively, tucking a stray piece of hair behind his ear.

“I’d like you better without it.”

With just one strong, yet calculated pull he has you sat over the length of his thigh. Your hands land on his chest for stability, right over his pecks that fill your palms easily. There’s nothing you want more than to suck on those perfectly sculpted lips of his, but you’re not too faithful on Donghyuck’s mouthwash so you settle for the earlobe that isn’t pierced instead.

He loves the feeling, the activation of his erogenous area and the suction of your lips that resembles one of your favourite activities together.

“I like this shirt”, he starts, unbuttoning your chest into plain view, “and I love this skirt”

He runs his big hands over the plumpless of your ass, squeezing it then retracting his fingers back on your thighs. They’re cold against your burning skin and the contrast causes goosebumps to erupt in the shape of his handprint.

“You love all my skirts Johnny”

“I do. Because I can do this”

His fingers roll the hem of your skirt up your thigh, the only thing separating your heat with the smooth fabric of his slacks being your skimpy underwear. You’re pretty sure the wetness must be transferring to it already, your thoughts of Donghyuck and all the things he could do with you having you desperate for a release. Johnny pets your clit over your panties then, just a light graze of his finger that elicits a moan from you.

Your hips move on their own, slowly humping his thigh that flexes from under you. You grab his tie to help your movement when your pace picks up, enjoying his body heat that coated you.

“Someone might see us.”

His desk chair was large, sure, but so was Johnny, and even though his back was facing the door of his office, no one could mistake the sight of you riding him as anything else.

“I told you, Donghyuck keeps disappearing. And it seems like it won’t take you too long to cum with the way you moan like that, right babe?”

“Johnny…”

You were a whiny mess at this point, humping his leg to reach your high. He was nice enough to help you, his hands guiding you as you mess up all over him, lips stuck on the patch of skin right under your ear.

“You know, I kind of miss you calling me Mr. Suh.” he whispers as he’s sucking on your neck, and you shiver at the tone of his voice, “What do I have to do next time you come over to have you call me like that?”

You can’t contain your whimpers anymore, the stinging tears of arousal threatening to roll down your face, so you close your eyes to keep the moisture in. Everything is just too much, the pleasure of your clit rubbing on him, his nails that dig in the flesh of your hips, the heavy suggestions in his words; your orgasm was hanging by a thread and it was a matter of seconds for it to snap. And it did snap, with a bite on your neck, and along with it your eyes snapped open as well.

Donghyuck was staring right back at you.

Your eyes crossed in pleasure, blurry vision making it hard to focus on him. You were falling apart over Johnny’s body, legs shaking and insides melting with his praise. Donghyuck took the sight in from the opened door, eyes studying your face of pleasure and bare chest decorated with Johnny’s kisses peeking from his own shirt. You’d be lying had you dismissed the fact that his presence intensified your orgasm times a hundred. The exposure of your act, the naughtiness of getting caught and by him of all people. You watched as he retreated outside from the office with silent steps, to give you privacy or recover from the embarrassment or both.

And Donghyuck would be lying too, had he said he didn’t like the sight. The mere memory of your face all fucked out flushed his own in crimson red. He remembered it all clearly, from your plush lips to Johnny’s mess of a hair, to the tremble of your body. It refused to leave his mind, the scene of you getting satisfaction from another man, but not because he wanted to erase it. He thought he fit right in, right in that scene between you and his boss.

You texted him later that day, apologizing for what he had to witness and promising him you would return the shirt as soon as you washed it. He politely allowed you to keep it, not at all acknowledging the incident from earlier, nor the night you spent together. You didn’t have the guts to ask, for you didn’t know that Donghyuck didn’t regard last night as a mistake, like you thought. He was tired of boiling in the guilt of his feelings, selfishly admitting to himself that he did not regret a single thing. He was into you, he meant every word that came out of his mouth, so why was he avoiding you all day yesterday? He was still the fucking coward.

The next day came rolling along, and with it came a long list of things you wanted to avoid. The first one was arguably dealing with your best friend, the lengthy paperwork you had to fill out being a close second.

Your mind was occupied with a plethora of thoughts, with Johnny holding the main spot. You’d seen him in your sleep last night, starring in the extremely detailed wet dream your brain fabricated for you, hot breaths and deep thrusts forcing you into the disappointing consciousness of today’s morning.

And the pictures he had sent you right after you decided to get up weren’t helping either. His tall, half naked build occupied most of the shot, skin glistening in the after-shower steam. His toothbrush was hanging from his foamy mouth, in an attempt to make the picture look nonchalant, yet you knew his motives. You let your eyes drink up the sight of his defined abdomen, then moved downwards along the dark happy trail that peeked from the towel, loosely hanging from his waist. Hip bones teasing you and all. Just drop the fucking towel Johnny.

Needless to say, you were a mess when you arrived at the office. The cats in heat outside of your window, the phallic shaped baguette your baker generously treated you with this morning; everything seemed to remind you of the heat between your legs that you couldn’t bring yourself to ignore. You tried rubbing your thighs, drowning in the paperwork, even locking your phone in one of your drawers so as not to be tempted to look at Johnny’s thirst trap again. But he had won.

You grab a bunch of documents that seemed important enough, shove them in your favourite binder, and make your way to Johnny’s office upstairs.

You knew you had to deal with Donghyuck. It was the unavoidable repercussion of messing up your life like that, getting men that were too good looking for this boring ass company tangled up in what seemed to be a simple internship. Taking a deep breath, then two more for good measure, you start to strut confidently in a straight line that led to Johnny’s office door.

“He’s on call, come back later.”

Your head instinctively turns to the source of the sound, to find Donghyuck staring at the display of his laptop that seemed to be much more interesting than you. The matter-of-fact way he formed his sentences was not unlike him, yet something in you begged for a little bit of attention. Blame it on how horny you’ve been all morning, or the fact that now that you’ve seen him naked, the strict tone affects you much more than it should.

Bothered by your thoughts and thinking about having to sit back at your office for the rest of the work day, you let the binder slip from your hands and drop on the wooden floor. You lean down to collect the scattered pieces of paper, your heels making it hard for you to keep your balance easily, and soon enough you sense a movement from behind you.

“No panties huh?”

It was supposed to be a surprise. Payback for the dirty thoughts Johnny planted in your head this morning. You’d walk in all innocently, sit right across his desk and give him a little Basic Instinct Sharon Stone moment. Then leave him high and dry again, while mentally keeping a note to clear out all your plans for the weekend. But see, he couldn’t give you what you wanted after all, and your resolve started to break. Whatever it was you wanted, you wanted it now.

You get up, unfolding your body slowly and refusing to look at Donghyuck, much like he did when you walked inside. The smirk playing on your lips couldn’t be concealed through your voice.

“Like what you see?”

You gasp as he presses up against you, the only contact you have with one another being his hard-on that nudges your ass. Following your body’s orders, you push back against him too, and you can tell the breath he lets out is ragged and full of tension.

He reaches for your binder with an arm around you, flipping through the pages as he sucks his teeth in disapproval.

“These are last week’s reports. Are you really here for these or are you looking for another quickie with Johnny?” A moan escapes you then, and the little thrust that Donghyuck allows himself drives you both crazy. “Thought so. How insatiable are you? I made you cum two nights ago, Johnny helped you out yesterday. If you really are that desperate you could’ve just come to me for help, doll”

His soft palm rests on the front of your thigh, slowly sliding his way under your skirt. You squirm in his hold in anticipation, and you have to bite your tongue to hold in the noises that threaten to leave you.

“Donghyuck, Johnny is sitting right through that door. He could come out any minute now and see us”

“And?”

“Your boss is sitting right through that door. You could get fired”

“I could die after this”

His thumb ficks your clit swiftly, and Donghyuck takes this opportunity to slip his other one inside your gaping mouth.

“But-“

“Shh. Don’t talk with your mouth full, baby”

You’re melting in his hold at this point, your back still resting against his chest, lips sucking his digit. The scent of his cologne that you’ve grown so familiar with overwhelms you, painting all your surroundings in a red tint of lust.

“Spread your legs for me”. You oblige with his orders immediately, your arousal not allowing you to keep him waiting. “Wider”.

You take a quick look behind your shoulder to check that the door is still, indeed, closed, only to be met face to face with Donghyuck. His breath is hot against your face, eyes locked on his thumb toying with your lower lip and you completely forget what you initially turned around for. The kiss was natural, your lips melding easily with his ones. The need for him washes over you like a heatwave and you lift your skirt to urge him to continue before you go insane.

He gets the hint and moves his hand lower, middle finger tracing your opening ever so slightly. It makes you shiver and you realise how quiet the room has fallen, the only source of sound coming muffled through the closed door to Johnny’s office. It excites you and it must show through the wetness between your lower lips, and Donghyuck patiently collects it all. He transfers the moisture over the bud of your clit, his finger smoothly massaging the sensitive skin. It feels divine and there’s no way you’d ask him to stop yet you know there’s something else Donghyuck is after, the sweet tightness that he didn’t get to experience that night at his apartment.

It was a bit much to fuck you out there like that, even for his exhibitionistic tendencies, but nothing could stop him from feeling the next best thing.

His first finger enters you unhurriedly, careful of your reactions. You moan out his name and he moans at how tight you are, soft pussy practically sucking his finger in. He soon enters his ring finger as well, slowly moving them inside you until you feel every stretch and curl. Your wetness starts to drip at this point, coating his fingers with your juices.

“Such a dirty girl, making all this mess at my office”

The leisure pace ruins you, your eyes shut close in search of patience. You feel his other palm move from under your skirt as well, resting flat against your lower abdomen. He wants to feel himself inside you.

“Donghyuck, please. More”

A chuckle is heard from your left ear, and you can vividly imagine how his face must look like now. The cocky smirk, the tongue poking the inside of his cheek. The next pump has you muffling your whimpers with the back of your fist, his fingers curling just right and fucking straight into your g-spot.

“More? Look at you. Pretty slut.”

He’s full on finger fucking you now, and swallowing your moans is gradually becoming more and more difficult. The world crumbles from under your feet and you let yourself get carried away in the intense pleasure, the fast pumping making your legs shake.

“You’re gonna cum?”, he whispers again, and you can only respond with a nod, “That’s my fucking girl”

The orgasm’s intense, shaking you as you bite your hand and hold onto Donghyuck for extra support. He continues to move his fingers afterwards, drawing out your euphoria for as long as he can, then finally leaves you empty once your moans have died down. You immediately cover yourself up again once you sober up from your high, suddenly embarrassed by Donghyuck’s intense stare. He’s moving his eyes through all the features of your face, only for them to fall frozen on your lips, and lifts his hand up to rest his two fingers over them. You get his initiative and put them in your mouth, tasting yourself on your tongue.

“Unless you want us both to get fired I think you should go back to your office. I don’t think I can contain myself around you”

You release his digits with a pop, your eyes full of seduction.

“What would you do to me?”

Donghyuck growls at your question, turning you around so that you’re fully face to face and chest to chest.

“You’d look so pretty on your knees, mouth full of cock”. He grabs a handful of your ass, bringing you flush against him and proceeds to grind his painfully hard dick between your thighs. Your noses touch and you feel dizzy at the proximity; the words he mutters against your cum coated lips. “I’d peel those clothes off of you, find the nearest mirror. Stretch you out against the glass so that you see how good you take it.”

You shiver as a response, then force yourself to put some distance between you before you do something stupid. He kindly helps you collect your things in silence, those useless documents that were laying scattered on the floor, and in a moment of weakness you let him pin you against the wall right before you go.There was something so addictive about him and your chemistry, and your lips burn at the memory of his kisses. You’re not sure how much longer you can contain that hunger anymore.

The end of a shift and the beginning of another overtime. It felt like deja vu at this point, after all the countless extra hours you’ve put into the internship, seeing people grab their briefcases and their car keys as they empty the space around you. You take a moment to appreciate the view of the setting sun from the small window of your office, inhaling deeply as you wrap the hair that’s been bothering you in a ponytail. Your neck hurts and the tension of your body is translating into a dull pain, so you stretch it a little, bobbing your head from side to side.

You jump a little in your seat when you feel a set of hands on your shoulder blades. They massage the sore spots, treating the muscle knots and helping your blood flow freely. It was obvious Donghyuck didn’t have enough of you earlier, and you pout at having to turn down another visit to his apartment because of your overtime duties.

You were ready to scold him off, tell him you’re busy and that you promise to make it up for him another time, when you feel his soft lips kissing the most sensitive spot on the slope of your neck. You let out a long sigh, subconsciously exposing your neck more for him, and a high pitched whine rumbles in your chest. It’s released as a moan of Donghyuck’s name.

“Donghyuck?!”

You freeze in the uncomfortable arch, your ears confused by the deepness of the voice belonging to the man behind you. Not even the confusion laced in it can cover up the lack of airiness and clarity you’re used to when it comes to Donghyuck’s tone. It’s Johnny.

“I… We-“

You’re left speechless, clueless as to what to say next. You know you don’t have to explain yourself, it’s not like you and Johnny are exclusive. Yet his shocked face at the sound of his assistant’s name coming so lewdly off your lips has your brain scrambling to find some sort of explanation. Thankfully, he’d interrupt your panic in a second.

“The big boss wants you upstairs. I offered to come get you.”

He doesn’t sound angry or upset, nor disappointed. It’s a fresh air of relief before you realize that this is not what you should worry about right now. What the hell does the CEO of the company want to talk to you about? Are you getting the boot? It must be it, but why? Your numbers have been great, you’re always on time - except that one morning, but technically it was Donghyuck’s fault - and you’ve been praised by your supervisor numerous times during your internship.

Unless- What if there’s cameras in the office?

You start to panic at the thought of an involuntary sex tape become the cause of your dismissal, so caught up in your thoughts that you’re completely unaware you’ve spent the entire trip up the stairs with Johnny in silence. When you enter the CEO’s office, heartbeat echoing loudly in your ears, you notice that all of the department’s supervisors are present in the impromptu meeting as well. You sit next to Johnny, in an attempt to calm yourself down, and you see the head of your department send you an encouraging smile.

“Shall we start?”

A briefing of your work in the company ensued, numbers and graphs that wouldn’t make sense to anyone other than the people in the room. Thirty minutes have passed and no surveillance tape has been whipped out, turning you more confused than ever. The numbers were good, the words from your supervisor are complimentary, so why would they fire you?

“That is all for the briefing. After seeing your progress and the contribution you’ve made to the company, we’ve decided to offer you a permanent position, if you’d be interested of course”

Oh my god. You can’t believe this day finally came. Your face was glowing, and you tried to convince yourself to stay calm while you talked about your new position and the raise in salary that came with it. With shaky hands you sign the documents, and your boss congratulates you once again, dismissing you off your overtime.

You waited for everyone to leave the hallway before jumping in Johnny’s arms. He caught you easily, strong build supporting you and lifting your feet off the ground before landing you safely again.

“Good job intern, I’m so proud of you”

“Hey, I’m not an intern anymore!”, you complain by bumping his chest with your fist and he pats your head lovingly in return.

“Why did you have to be in the room as well? Did you know about my promotion?”

“No, actually, they just told me an hour ago. It was hard to keep myself from telling you everything right away.”

The excitement coursed through you, and a sudden urge to kiss him until your lips were numb overwhelmed you. You were ready to turn your thoughts into reality, when you saw Donghyuck from the corner of your eye, instinctively smiling at your obvious happiness.

“What’s the occasion?”

“I got promoted!”

Donghyuck gasped, a huge smile spreading across his face. Your excitement’s contentious so he tackles you without a second thought, his embrace so tight that you can barely breathe. You can see that he’s trying his best to contain a kiss, his glance moving back and forth between you and Johnny. He still kept a possessive hand around your waist once he let you down however, a gesture that could seem innocent yet you knew better.

Johnny smirks at the sight of you two, confidence dripping off his body and making you shiver. You get dizzy at the thought of Donghyuck not knowing that Johnny knows about you, yet Donghyuck knowing about Johnny but not giving a fuck.

“So how do we celebrate?”, the older man asks, with a playful tone that might as well be your active imagination.

“Wanna go for a drink?”, Donghyuck suggests, boldly keeping his eyes at you only while he does so.

You pout in thought, humming pensively when an idea pops into your head.

“How about you come over my place for one?”

You should have thought this through more thoroughly, is all you can think about as you’re trapped between Johnny and Hyuck on your couch. Well, not really- there is a sizable distance between you three, yet the atmosphere in the room is so dense it’s nearly palpable. Three glasses, half-full of the alcohol of their choice are sitting on the coffee table in front of you, and you awkwardly stare at the sweat that falls from your glass and forms rings on the wooden surface.

Your body has loosened up from your drink yet your heart can’t stop racing, not when Donghyuck is looking at you like that. He looks like a man starved for days while you’re the meal presented deliciously in his arm’s reach, and he can’t wait to have you alone and curve his growing appetite. And you ignore Johnny’s cheeky smiles and flirtatious winks as well, carrying on a conversation that doesn’t belong in the inescapable tone of the room but flows easily, until it ends and you’re met with heavy silence and the ticking analog clock on your wall again.

You ask them if they would like some water, getting up before you receive an answer, and you yelp a little when you feel a strong arm halting your trip to the kitchen before it even started. You lose your balance and wobble a little in your spot before unceremoniously landing on Johnny’s lap.

He doesn’t help you up, but loops and arm around your waist instead, holding you in place. In circumstances other than the ones that have already made their mark on your sexual history, staying in this position with his assistant still in the room would be highly inappropriate.

“You’re all we need”, he reassures you with a voice made of silk, then repositions you with a jerk of his knee, your heat grinding right against his half hard member.

“When were you gonna tell me?”

You open and close your mouth sequentially like a fish out of water, choking out a reply after the insistent tick-tock that resonates through the room and gives a tempo to your anxiety.

“I’m sorry?”

“You know what I’m talking about. A little birdy told me I’m not the only one enjoying this perfect little body. Is that right Donghyuck?”

Donghyuck’s eyes bulged out of his skull, almost choking in the sip of the drink he was enjoying when the unexpected question hit him. Sizzling heat floods your face as he stares at you sternly, and you shake your head defensively.

“I didn’t tell him-“

“Well no, not exactly”, Johnny interrupts and places his big hands over your thighs, “I was just kissing her neck, trying to get her to relax, and lo and behold, she starts moaning your name like its a fucking reflex. You’ve really gotten into her head, apparently”

Donghyuck swells up in pride, that much is evident, yet he’s way too distracted to say anything in response, too busy staring at Johnny’s fingers spreading your thighs apart to expose your damp underwear. Johnny’s lips are planted on your neck, teeth nibbling on your earlobe and you wince when you feel the sharp sting of a slap on your inner thigh.

“You aren’t being a good hostess, baby. Open up your legs more, let Hyuck see your pretty pussy. You remember what word to say when you want me to stop, right?” You whimper the designated safe word while opening your thighs further, digging the heels of your feet in the couch’s pillows. “Good girl”

He dips a hand through the band of your underwear, busying his fingers under the fabric. You moan as they slide through the wetness and he smiles a cocky smile when he sees Donghyuck palming himself through his slacks. He removes the skimpy thong with the help of your hips moving to assist him, to then push the fabric inside your mouth with little to no resistance from you.

“Isn’t this pussy divine? I swear when I bottomed out inside of her the first time I thought I lost my damn mind”

He toys with your opening, only dipping half a finger in to challenge Donghyuck to pay attention.

“We haven’t actually…”

“She only let you play with her?”, Johnny teases him, then pushes his point and middle finger all the way inside you, making his assistant’s imagination run wild at what your pussy must feel like sucking him in. “You’re missing out man”

“I’ve made her cum probably twice as many times as you’ve ever have”

You chuckle at his smart remark and Johnny glares at you, softly slapping your pussy to keep you at bay.

“No one addressed you. You’ll get to make all the noise you want in a sec, baby”

You squirm in place, letting out a muffled apology through your gag and Donghyuck looks seriously affected by the sight.

“Isn’t she obedient?”, Johnny asks while grazing your g-spot, and you moan from both the praise and the stimulation.

Hyuck unbuttons his pants at the lewd sound, pulling his dick from the slit of his boxers and you admire his impressive girth. He lets his body decline comfortably on the pillows behind him, spreading his own legs at shoulder-length. The mouth-watering sight of him jerking himself slowly with the aid of his precum clouds your vision; you’re just as needy for him as he is for you.

“She’s a little brat”

“I guess I know how to make her listen”. Johnny lifts your dress over your hips, then helps you off of it through the hem. With a rehearsed flick of his fingers he discards your bra as well, leaving you completely naked for Donghyuck’s eyes to feast on. His hands immediately grope your breasts, playing with the mounds and putting on a show. “I could undress you over and over and over again”

You feel his fingers retract from inside your pussy to form a ‘V’ over your lower lips, making your hole even more visible along with the wetness that’s dripping out of it.

“Will you let Donghyuck use your pussy baby? I feel a little greedy using it all on my own”

You groan in the anticipation and let your head fall back on Johnny’s shoulder, nodding pathetically and mumbling through your thong.

“Oh god, yes, yes, yes”

Donghyuck has heard enough, and with Johnny urging him on he’s standing half naked in front of you in seconds. His boxers are discarded next to his trousers on the floor, tie hanging loosely from the collar. He still has a hand wrapped around his angry sex, red tip and veiny details making you swoon.

“Go on”, Johnny encourages him, “she’s more than wet enough”

Donghyuck rests his left knee on the cushion of the couch, right between your foot and Johnny’s thigh. A little foiled square is getting ripped by his nimble fingers and you bewitchedly watch him wrap up his cock. He slaps it over your entrance a couple times, coming in contact with the other man’s fingers that are still keeping you fully exposed, then finally thrusts himself inside you. A conglomerate of what seems like three different curses leave his lips, eyebrows furrowed in a pleasureful expression.

“Fuck”

“Tight, isn’t she?”

“So fucking tight baby, damn”

Johnny may have a cock so lengthy that most men are envious of, yet Donghyuck’s girth is really something else. It stretches you out more than you've had in months, dull pain getting numb with every release of serotonin from your brain. You almost cry when he removes the entire thing out of you.

“I have to feel that again”

And indeed he does, submerging himself in the tightness of your walls only his fingers had the privilege of experiencing thus far. You feel amazing wrapped up around him, pussy hot and burning in desire as he dips himself further inside you, pushing you up against Johnny’s chest. You hiss in the sting and whimper softly, prompting the man behind you to ungag you finally.

“What is it baby? Hyuckie’s dick is too big for your tight little hole?”

You nod affirmatively while keeping eye contact with the man mentioned, big glossy eyes awakening something dark inside him. He wants to ruin you.

“Maybe you don’t fuck her hard enough”

You can’t see Johnny from the way you’re seated but you know he must have a smile on his face, well aware of the confidence he possesses for his own abilities in the bedroom. His big hands leave your labia and make their way over to your calves, bending you in a way that is almost painful.

“How about you show me how it’s done, then?”

Donghyuck is always up for a challenge, so he wraps a hand loosely around your throat so as to gain leverage. He pulls his hips backwards, gaining momentum, then slaps them forcefully against your own. You moan loudly at the depth, hands scrambling to find something to hold on to as he’s nailing you against the couch. Johnny’s there to catch your sounds with his lips, eating them up eagerly as he slips his tongue inside you and continues to play with your nipples.

“Is that hard enough for you?”

Continuing his brutal pace restlessly, Donghyuck tightens his grasp around your neck, enough to hamper your blood flow and drool around the other man’s mouth. You’re so out of it at this point, dirty sound after another leaving your lips and you gasp at Johnny’s fingers that are suddenly circling around your clit.

“I’m close, please”, you manage to whimper from between them, Hyuck’s pace only fastening in the sound of your plea. The tip of his cock, thick like the rest of him, grazes against your sensitive spot again and again, not missing a single thrust. He digs a thumb in the softness of your cheek, pulling you away from Johnny and connecting his forehead with yours. By the sounds of his grunts it won’t take long until he comes as well.

“Made just for me”, he whispers against your lips, and you gasp when you feel the heat overflowing in your sex area, vision blurry as you let go and scream in complete pleasure. Donghyuck basks in the confirmation of how good he’s made you feel, hips stuttering as he empties his cum in you and inside the condom. His thigh muscles may be contracting in tiredness yet he doesn’t halt his movements, milking your orgasm for all its worth. You’re basically putty in Johnny’s lap at this point, sex drunk and high from your release.

“Not bad”, he admits, even though he had some credit to claim with the fast fingerwork he showed earlier. He holds your thighs again, closing them up to help you relax and you wince at the pain in your haunch, the result of staying in a flexibility-demanding position for so long.

You wait until your heartbeat slows down, turning around to face Johnny as Donghyuck ties up and discards the used condom. He sends you a warm smile, petting the messy hair out of your line of sight and you relax in the feeling of safety, batting your eyes up at him cutely.

“What about you?”, you practically meow, moaning softly as you feel his boner twitching from beneath his trousers.

“What about me? Didn’t you have enough?”

He knows your appetite, knows there’s no way you’d be satisfied by one round only. And how could you, when he sits so deliciously from under you, his big body reeling you in. You know what he wants to hear.

“Please, Johnny”, you plead, playing with the thin tie still neatly keeping his shirt in place. “I need you”

“You need what?”, he growls against your lips, trying to coax as much desperation out of you as possible.

“I need your big cock inside me, please”

“Ass up”

You get up from your seat, complying with his commands and getting on your knees before your tired legs betray you and leave you a mess on the floor. His hands cup your ass in admiration, giving it a little spank before he slides them over your dorsals. A careful push forces you to arch your back even more, and your cheeks burn at the eager position he has bent you in. You shiver when his cock enters you halfway.

“You’re still not used to me babe?”

“It’s not my fault that you’re so fucking big, Johnny”

“Then maybe I should stay still? Since you can’t take it?”

“No!”, you oppose, tears of frustration threatening to spill out of their ducts, “I can take it, just move!”

You howl as he bottoms out, his long length making you lose your mind. It’s been a while since you’ve had anything more than his fingers and you’ve missed the way he fits inside of you. You hear shuffling from behind you and soon he’s bending over you, wrapping his tie around your neck. With a pull you’re flush against his chest again, and the buttons of his shirt are already leaving little indentations on your skin. You wish it bruises.

“Do you remember what I wanted you to call me the other day?”, he whispers next to the shell of your ear, dark tone sending shivers down your spine.

“Mr. Suh”

“Exactly. Now will you let me fuck you the way I want?”

“Yes sir”

“What a good girl”

Johnny slams into you fully, every pull of his hips resulting in the restriction of your airflow. A game of wanting more of him and sacrificing your oxygen for it begins, and it doesn’t take long for you to turn completely into a submissive mess for him. He’s whispering filth in your ears, hips keeping their inhuman tempo until you’re all out of energy and fall nonvocal. Donghyuck gets hard again at the sight.

It doesn’t go unnoticed by Johnny, who is more than willing to share your body for the pleasure he’s after- at least part of it. He waits until the younger man’s dick is fully solid in his grasp, standing tall and red right in front of you and he lets go of the constraint of your neck without notice.

You fall face first on Donghyuck’s thick thighs, his quick reflexes catching you from a harder impact. His member is twitching right next to your face, tip grazing against your left temple and he helps your head up by wrapping your hair in a makeshift ponytail that his fingers hold together. You wrap your lips around his tip obediently, twirling your tongue around his member until you reach his hairy base. He tastes a bit rubbery from the condom earlier but you choose to ignore it, focusing on hollowing your cheeks around him instead.

Every hard thrust of Johnny’s propels you forward onto Donghyuck’s cock, the bobbing motion natural yet you struggle to take them both inside you. Donghyuck enjoys the vibrations of the moans you make when the other man hits a deep spot in your pussy, Johnny groans when you clench around him as Donghyuck abuses your throat. It’s a give and take of intense pleasure and you know you can’t take much more, the men’s moans growing louder with every thrust.

“Do you like Hyuck’s cock needy baby? Have you finally had enough?”

He punctuates each word with a slam, one harder than the other, and the rope inside your belly snaps with the arrival of your second orgasm. You try your hardest to stay in place, beg your thighs not to let you collapse as you let Johnny drive you into overstimuation.

“Yes, sir. I love it”

Johnny grunts at the sound of his title, so dirty coming muffled by another man’s dick that it’s enough to send him over the edge. You feel the hot cum filling up the condom inside you, and his spurts take so long that the little tweaks coax another orgasm from you.

Donghyuck drinks up the scene unveiling in front of him, a steady hand forcing your jaw open as he starts to jerk off quickly over your face.

“I want to see your tongue covered in my cum”

You lick your lips seductively in response, opening your mouth up to welcome his ropes of white liquid that leave his slit a second after. They fill your mouth little by little, painting the inside of it and you hold your tongue out to show him his creation, a couple of drops dripping from the corners before you swallow as much as you can. He collects whatever’s left on your jaw, pushing it in and letting you suckle on his thumb dumbly before letting go.

You collapse on the couch, exhausted after giving all that your body could handle after a work day, and you sit in silence as Johnny massages your feet and Donghyuck kisses your neck to calm you down. Your head hurts from the sex and the possibilities that this new combination can bring to your love life, belly tingling in excitement at the same time. You don’t know where this will lead, or when will be the next time you’ll indulge in the company of the both of them stuck on your body. All that you know is that this promotion, at least the celebration of it, tastes really, really sweet.

thank you for reading ❤ feedback is much appreciated! If you liked Promotion you can check out Work for it to see where it all started! :)

#neosmutcollective #neowritingsnet #johnny suh #johnny suh smut #lee haechan #haechan smut #donghyuck smut #johnny suh x reader #haechan x reader #nct smut #nct #nct 127 #nct dream #johnny seo smut #johnny seo #johnny nct smut #haechan nct smut #nct dream smut

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asciendo · 3 years ago

Text

Your Eyes Tell

You break up with Zuko when Ozai threatens his life if you continue with your relationship. But when you find out Ozai sends an assassin to kill him when he leaves to join team Avatar, you leave the Fire Nation to save him despite knowing how much you hurt him.

It's been two months since you broke up with Zuko and now he's gone.

You heard from your father that Zuko switched sides and joined the Avatar. You tried to hide your concern at the dinner table as your father broke the news to your family. Your mother gave you a worried look as she always had suspicions about your relationship with the Prince.

"Ozai is furious. I don't think he's going to give Zuko another chance after this." Your father stated as you continued to fiddle with your hands. "That's his son. I don't think...do you think he'd go that far?" Your mother questioned. "I don't know...you saw what he did to Zuko after he questioned him..." Your father sighed. You tried to remain calm but you felt like your heart was beating out of your chest.

Your father was a high ranking general and was a close confidant of Ozai. Although, lately you could tell he's been questioning Ozai's methods after seeing the destruction and death he's been laying upon the other nations. Your father was loyal to the Fire Nation would do anything to protect its people, but you'd overhear him and your mother talking about how he was worried about Ozai's methods.

"He's sending an assassin after Zuko." Your gaze shot up, "WHAT?!" You blurted out. "A-are you sure?" Your mother asked and your dad nodded. "He's sending the combustion mad." You froze. He was known to be one of the most ruthless assassins in the Fire Nation. He was known to master a rare style of fire bending that allows him to trigger explosions from a tattoo on his forehead. "I'm not feeling well...can I go to my room?" You asked and your father nodded leaving your mother with a concerned look in her eyes as you left.

As soon as you entered your room you fell to the floor and cried. You hated this. You hated yourself for breaking up with Zuko but you had no choice.

It was two months ago and you were walking around the palace. Thanks to your father's close relationship with the Fire Lord, you spent your whole life within the palace walls. You grew up with Azula and Zuko and your families were close as well. It wasn't until Zuko returned from his banishment that the both of you began your relationship but decided to keep it a secret as he still had a lot to prove to his father. Zuko wanted to prove he was focused and determined and if Ozai found out he was seeing you, Zuko would be right back where he started before leaving to capture the Avatar.

Unfortunately, your fears came true and Ozai discovered your secret relationship. You were on your way home after sneaking into Zuko's room and as you made your way to the throne room until you heard voices. You recognized one to be Ozai's and the other Azula's.

"Your brother appears to be distracted these days." Ozai's voice boomed throughout the room. " Well it's because he's with his little girlfriend most of the time." Azula replied

"Girlfriend?!" Ozai fires back and you gulp. "Yes, your favorite general's daughter." There was a hint of disgust in Azula's voice which made your blood boil. Despite being "friends" with Azula, it was obvious she looked down on you along with Mai and Tai Lee.

"First, Zuko questions me, now he's frolicking with that girl instead of focusing on his duties as Fire Prince." Ozai growls and you heard his footsteps walk back and forth as he paced around his throne. "He has to be taught a lesson that boy."

"I couldn't agree more, father." You could almost see the smirk on Azula's face at the tone of her voice. "I wonder...does Zuko really need his other eye?" Your heart dropped. His father was about to punish Zuko again...because of you. Your memory shot back to the moment Ozai burned Zuko's face in their Agni Kai. You remember burying your face in your hands while trying to shut out Zuko's screams. .

"Bring him here." Ozai commanded. You don't know what came over you, but you found yourself running into the throne room.

Azula and Ozai both stared at you and Azula chuckled. "Don't hurt him." You were surprised at your own voice coming out. "And why shouldn't I? He's being careless and has to be taught a lesson."

"I'll end it." Your voice shook as you were being stared down by the two of them. "Would that even do anything?" Azula rolled her eyes as she lazily observed her fingers.

"It will. You'll see...it was my idea to start a relationship. Not his. If you're going to punish someone...punish me." Azula raised an eyebrow at your suggestion and looked towards Ozai who began to think.

"Not necessary." Ozai stated and Azula frowned. "Your father is an important ally of mine, wouldn't want to upset him."

The room fell silent as the three of you stared at one another. "I suppose...if you end your relationship with my son...that will do for now." Your shoulders dropped in relief.

"But, I don't care if you're together or not, if he upsets me in any way again I won't hold back." Ozai turned his back and left the room. Azula smirked at you and followed him out.

You were lying in bed that night and couldn't sleep. Your mind was racing with thoughts of Zuko and how you were going to end it. You heard the window open and the sound of familiar footsteps making its way to your bed.

Before Zuko could slip in next to you, you immediately turned away from him.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he chuckled but you refused to answer.

"I don't need you anymore." You spat out and he stammered back. "What do you mean you don't need me anymore?!"

You buried your head in your covers, trying not to look at him. "I mean, I don't need you anymore, Zuko. I'm done."

"Done?! W-what do you mean done—did something happen?" you heard his footsteps come over to your side of the bed and you huffed.

He lifted the covers over your face and you had no choice but to look at him.

Zuko's eyes were a mixture of sadness and confusion and you chocked out a sob. He slowly brought his hands to your face, but you swatted it. Knowing exactly what to say to get him to leave, to leave you for good. "I can't be with a coward." Zuko stumbled back after this. You knew about his never-ending torment about betraying Iroh out of fear of his father. How he barely slept every night thinking about his uncle sitting in his cell, about how he was scared to do the right thing because he would lose his honor in his family again. "W-what?" Zuko was farther from you now, sad eyes staring into your like daggers. You were fighting the urge to break right there, tell him everything you knew about his father's warning, but you had to protect him. "You left Iroh to rot in a cell. You can't even stand up against your father and you're a disgrace to the Fire Nation. What kind of future is that?" You said coldly, biting your tongue to fight back the tears that were fighting to come out. "

"Do you really mean it?" His voice broke and you were dying to apologize to him, to tell him you thought he was so much more than what he thought of himself, that he was one of the few genuinely good people here, but you had to do this to protect him.

"Yes. I hate you, Zuko...I didn't realize it till now but...I'm embarrassed of you. Being with you...makes me hate myself too." You stated, face blank. Zuko's face dropped. You've never seen him like this, so empty, like he lost all the hope he had in the world. You wanted to reach out to him, you did...but he was gone before you could.

You'd see him in State events but never spoke, and the one time he had to greet you out of courtesy it was like he was talking to a stranger.

Now, here you are somewhere in the forest, looking for him. You heard from one of the guards who was loyal to you that combustion man was able to track Team Avatar near the mountains next to the refugee camps. He told you that he got his scent and was close by.

You heard voices and crouched by the bush. You saw a figure by the river and crawled closer to see who it was. It was a girl, probably your age dressed in blue who was doing laundry. This must be the water bender you thought. Mai and Ty Lee would tell you stories about their time chasing the Avatar and reuniting with Zuko.

Deciding to confront her and ask where Zuko was you began to walk towards her. Her shoulders tensed at the sound of footsteps behind. The girl whipped her head around and her eyes grew wide. Before you could speak, she was shooting water in your direction. "HEY!" You dodged, but she kept going. Grunting in frustration, you began shooting fire back at her.

You were fighting for a while now until suddenly, a boomerang was flying next to your head which caused you to duck.

There was a boy in blue running towards you with a smaller girl in green running next to him.

The girl stomped her foot on the ground and rocks in the shape of bars began to form around you but you were able to roll out of the way. The water bender was about to attack once more but then you heard your name being called behind you.

"Y/N?" You froze and your heart dropped. You haven't heard Zuko's voice in so long and you swore you almost crumbled right there. Slowly, you turned around and faced him for the first time in months. "W-what are you doing here?" he asked, and you couldn't answer. The Avatar arrived and the whole group was staring at you.

You couldn't speak. You didn't know what to say to him and time just stopped. Your eyes never left Zuko and he was staring right back at you.

"Who is she?!" The water bender asked as you and Zuko continued to look at each other.

"Y/N." Was all Zuko said which caused everyone to look at one another in confusion except the guy with the boomerang. "Oh...is she the one you were telling me about?" Zuko blushed in embarrassment but walked towards you.

"I'm sorry, I'm lost...who is she?" The Avatar asked.

"Zuko's ex-girlfriend." Boomerang guy attempted to whisper but failed as everyone heard him. The water bender stared at you curiously while the earth bender huffed and stuck up her nose.

"What are you doing here, Y/N?" Zuko was in front of you now and your heartbeat was rising. You missed him. All you wanted was to kiss him right then and there, but you knew whatever you two had was over. Before you could reply, you saw a figure suddenly appear behind Zuko. The rest of the team was too busy waiting what would happen that they didn't notice combustion man's arrival.

Combustion man's eyes turned red and he smirked, the eye in the middle of his head started to glow and you knew he was about to attack.

"LOOK OUT!" You shouted and shoved Zuko to the side before Combustion man could strike.

The rest of the group were on the floor from the explosion except the Avatar who was on a tree.

"WHO IS THAT?!" Boomerang guy yelled above the explosion.

Looking down, you realized you fell on top of Zuko. Your eyes met his and you noticed his expression change to somewhat of realization. He looked like he was putting the pieces of a puzzle together while looking at you and he was frozen. Combustion Man tried to attack Zuko again but you pulled him away.

"WHAT IS HAPPENING?!" Boomerang guy yelled once more. Spotting the boomerang attached to his waist, you created a plan.

"AVATAR!" You yelled and he looked down at you from the tree. "Distract him!" He looked at you with confusion. You realized they didn't trust you yet, still being in your Fire Nation clothes, they still weren't sure what side you were on. "Come on! Do it!" You yelled and he nodded.

"BOOMERANG GUY!" You shouted once more and he looked at you in fear. "When the Avatar has him distracted, throw your boomerang at the eye on his forehead, it will block his chi."

"Why should I listen to you?! You were just attacking my sister!" he yelled back. "GOSH SOKKA JUST DO IT! THIS IS NOT THE TIME!" The earth bender yelled and Sokka jumped back in shock. "ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT!"

The Avatar shot an air ball at Combustion Man which caused him to stumble. While he was caught off guard, Sokka threw his boomerang hitting him directly on the eye.

Combustion Man grunted in pain but suddenly lost control and shot an explosion to the nearby mountain. Suddenly the rocks began to shake and immediately rolled down the mountain and crushed him.

The whole group sighed but Zuko was still looking at you. Suddenly, you felt rock squeeze around your wrists. Looking down, your wrists were bound in handcuffs made of rocks.

"Seriously?! I just saved your lives!" You yelled but the group continued to stare at you. "Yeah, but you were attacking Katara when we got here." The earth bender stated.

"SHE ATTACKED ME FIRST!" But they weren't having it. You looked at Zuko and his expression changed. He looked deep in thought as he stared back at you.

"Come on...just let me go and I'll be out of here." You whispered still looking at him. "We still don't know why you're here. You could be a spy." You rolled your eyes at the small girl.

"If I as a spy I would have let you all be killed by Combustion Man." You stated.

"That makes sense..." Katara nodded slowly but earth bender was still not having it.

"Still. It's risky to let you go, you're coming with us." She announced and began to walk away. Sokka grabbed your elbow and began to lead you behind her.

Zuko wasn't moving for a moment, watching the scene unfold like it was a movie. "Zuko...are you coming?" The Avatar asked. Zuko nodded slowly began to follow.

The earth bender, who you learned was called Toph made you a makeshift cell in their campsite. Rolling your eyes as you watched them enter their tents to go to bed, you sunk down and sat on the ground.

You started to drift off to sleep until you heard the door of your cell open. Slowly opening your eyes, you look up to see Zuko.

Your lips part in surprise as you slowly stand up to stare at him.

"What do you want?" You finally gained the courage to speak to him.

The Zuko in front of you is a different one than the one you left. The broken Zuko. The Zuko you hurt. Now, all you see are his golden eyes pouring into yours, mixed with anger and determination.

"Why are you here?" he asked, his tone was serious.

"Your friends put me in here! I don't wanna stay in this dumb cell—"

"No. Why are you here?!" He almost yelled at you, but he kept his voice low enough so he wouldn't wake the others.

"I don't know what you mean—"

"Bull Shit." Zuko interrupted but moved closer to you. "I don't know what you want me to say—"

"Do you still hate me?" His question caught you off guard. Unlike last time, there was no sadness in his voice, now, it felt like he was challenging you.

"Zuko—"

"Did you come here to protect me? I know you knew about Combustion Man." You looked away, refusing to meet his eyes. You didn't know why you were being so difficult. It wasn't like Ozai or Azula were here. But you felt immense guilt for what you said to him, you didn't deserve him.

"When you broke up with me...there was something else right? You were just saying all of those things to protect me?!" Zuko was angry. He had every right to be, for you to just show up here, and not even telling him the real reason why you came.

"I'm not stupid, alright? I know combustion man is an assassin under my father! I know he was here to kill me...and after everything, you show up out of nowhere...I know you were here for me!" He was yelling now but you refused to budge.

"You made me think all this time you hated me! I thought the person I loved the most in this world hated me! For months I couldn't get you out of my head and it was torture seeing you around the palace looking like you didn't care! And you won't even tell me the real reason why you're here?" You looked at him in shock but still refused to speak and he shouted in frustration.

"Y/N...tell me right now why you're here—"

"Yes. I still hate you." Was all you said. You didn't though. You loved him. You were so proud of him for finally standing up to his father and carving his own destiny, but you didn't want to cause him anymore pain. You wanted him to continue being the man he was meant to be...even without you. You felt like you would bring him down, that you didn't deserve Zuko. You wanted to leave, to finally leave him, for good.

"No you don't." His voice was hard and his eyes didn't leave yours. "Zuko, what do you want from me?" You asked and he sighed.

"Do you really hate me?" He asked once more but he took a step closer to you and you backed away.

"YES! God, Zuko I don't know how many times I have to tell you! I hate—"

Before you could finish, Zuko's lips were on yours. Your eyes widened in surprise but as soon as his arms snaked around your waist, you melted around him.

You missed this. The feeling of his lips on yours. His touch. The way he clung to you like his life depended on it.

"No you don't." Was all he said when he pulled away. You were out of breath, and you looked up at him. The hard expression he had was replaced with tender eyes and you felt tears forming.

"H-how'd you know?" Your voice cracked as Zuko began to gently wipe the tears on your face.

"Your eyes tell." Was all he said and before you could speak, his lips were on yours again.

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