#it did not pan out but thats fine lol

[yeetushaitus]

kanade heat abnormal

[buckadoodledoo]

I think in all cases its a disservice to the character for them to do the parents forgiving thing (in chim’s case it was almost straight up ooc lol) but the thing that really annoys me about it with buck specifically is that buck is a character who has problems setting appropriate boundaries in his relationships and often just settles/accepts how the other party treats him… its mostly with his romantic relationships but I think it applies outside of that as well… and thats what makes that scene in buck begins where he asks them to call him buck so powerful and good to me. And then it just felt completely retconned by whatever in another life was. Plus the whole thing about his coma dream is that he was close with his parents and they were normal about him and part of choosing life was him leaving that behind but then they were acting the same irl as in the dream?? it was weird. Idk theres been just enough crumbs with buck and his parents that I wonder if they’ll readdress how the way they treat him hasnt changed that much actually but my hopes are not high. at all. (Similarity if they ever bring albert back I hope they address what happened in that ep bc it was so messed up for albert to bring their dad to LA like that)

it absolutely is a disservice. like, i am always thinking about chim. looking at jee-yun and saying that people always told him that when he became a father he'd understand his own father more. but how instead, it made him understand him even less. because chim looked at his child and could not understand how anyone could treat their child the way his father treated him. and then they had him forgive him and that was that. and well, the buckleys are horrendous. and i think buck forgiving them was less about him forgiving them and more about him taking whatever scraps he could get because that's what he does. but the show didn't frame it that way when they SHOULD HAVE. instead it was framed as the buckleys are redeemed now, everything is fine. when clearly everything is not fine. buck did not benefit at all from that. there was no healing there. and like. i do want to refrain from judgement until we see how it pans out with eddie and his parents but. he's forgiven them before and that was portrayed as something postitive, and then they did THIS. like, and it would be one thing if the show was making a point of showing that sort of cycle of forgiving and giving them another chance only for nothing to change. but that's never really how they framed it. like, nothing HAS changed for any of them. but we're still expected to accept that everything is fine now.

[annymation]

A fluffy Asha x Star Boy scene??? I'm begging you T-Tv the shipping thirst is not quenching 😭😭😭😭😭

@sylvieserene

I wrote a lot of Magnifico and Amaya content lately so let's answer some Asha x Aster asks before I talk more about the villains

Both because you guys miss them and I miss them too lol

So here's two lil cute stories I came up with the help of @uva124 and @emillyverse

Library Date

Asha and Aster go visit library for the first time since Aster turned into a human, Asha can't wait to show them her favorite books, and Aster can't wait to learn even more about human history.

Once they're in there, Asha takes him to the fairytales section:

"This one is my favorite! "1001 Nights", one of the tales is about a boy who finds a genie that grants him 3 wishes and- OH you know that flying carpet I drew? I got the idea from this book." She shows him the book excitedly

"Have you read aaaaall of these?" Aster looks in awe to all the other fairytale books

"Hehehe I don't think I even could, both because time and I can't reach those more high up" She points to the books on the tallest shelf

"I can get them for ya-" Aster jumps up with a smile, but when he lands back down he remembers "... Oh yeah hheheh I can't fly anymore" they looks embarrassed but not sad that he can't fly, just getting used to it.

Asha giggles a little

"But hey, thats fine, I can reach them like this" Aster starts climbing the book shelves

Asha is startled and holds him by the shirt "A-Aster no! Get down! You don't have to get them!"

"SHHHH" Some people around shush them.

Aster get's down and they just laugh quietly.

They sit together and Asha hands Aster the book for him to read, he opens it excitedly but as soon as he sees the words his smile deflated as he realizes

“… Oh… I don’t know how to read…” Aster says a bit embarrassed.

Asha is surprised for a second, but it does make sense he wouldn’t learn how to read living up in space

Asha smiles reassuringly and sits closer to him

“That’s alright, I can teach you. Here, let me show you”

And from this day on Asha and Aster go to the library everyday so Asha can teach him ho to read, like Jane and Tarzan or Belle and the beast.

Baking Chocolate Cookies 🍪

Aster wanted to make a surprise for Asha, so he asked for help from the 7 teens.

They suggested they should bake cookies. While the girls distracted Asha outside of the house Aster and the boys naked the cookies.

“Are you sure you guys can handle this? Maybe I should stay to help” Dahlia said, not trusting them alone in the kitchen

“Pfft relax! You’re the one who knows Asha the most, so you know how to distract her better than anyone, besides, it’s just a simple recipe, what’s the worst that could happen?” Aster says, pushing the girls out the kitchen

5 minutes later

The boys are running around panicking because there’s a huge fire coming out of a pan that Aster was cooking

“ASTER, HOW THE $&%£ DID YOU BURN THE WATER!? BOILING WATER WASNT EVEN IN THE RECIPE!” Gabo yelled trying to extinguish the fire coming from the pan

Asha and the girls are talking outside and Asha has her back turned away from the house, while the girls can see it from behind her, and they see the smoke coming from it, they try to hide their panic

“Do you girls smell that?” Asha asks, smelling smoke coming from somewhere

“NOPE!” They answered

Eventually the boys put out the fire and continue to make the cookies, that turned out…

Disappointing, but hey, at least they managed to make something.

Asha comes back with the girls soon after they finish baking, she looks around in shock with how the kitchen is a mess, Dahlia looks like she wants to kill the boys then and there

“Asha! You’re just in time!” Aster says excitedly going to gab the cookies “Look what we made fo- YAAOUUGH!!” Aster touched the baking tray without gloves and for the first time got himself burnt.

Later, Asha bandaged up his hands while eating one of the cookies

“They taste great!” Asha said with a smile, she was being honest, Aster felt really happy with that besides his hands still hurting.

[theparadoxspace]

What sort of shows/games/books have you been into lately?

oooh ive been into a lot of stuff lately so ill just divide it into three sections

Games

I play a LOT of games so I'll just say a bit about the last few games Ive been playing.

The Dragon Quest 3 remake was a lot of fun, I like simple, traditional RPGs every now and then and I thought the remake was very well done, I can't wait for the 1 and 2 remake.

I recently finished a metroidvania called Gestalt: Steam and Cinder. It was fine, the story and gameplay were fun enough and it left me satisfied despite having a very cliffhangery ending. Ive been kind of in a metroidvania mood recently since I also played Momodora: Moonlit Farewell, which is phenomenal, but that made me want to play Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow, which I started a few days ago.

Ive been trying to finish FF7 Rebirth since it came out last year and I just havent managed to get around finishing it, despite the fact that I was very much enjoying it.

Im also permanently playing Guilty Gear Strive, and for the past two years Ive been trying to play all of them and really get into the story.

Played a lot of Balatro last year too.

Finally, I play a lot of indie games and two days ago I started one called Isle of Pan which is a photography game where you explore an island and take pictures of weird creatures. Very cool and fun.

Books/Manga

For regular books, a couple of years ago I read the The Locked Tomb series and Ive been mildly obsessed with them. I cant wait for Alecto the Ninth to come out and I might re-read them all before it does.

Ive also been reading a lot of Kurt Vonnegut books. I had read Slaughterhouse-Five a few years ago and had been meaning to check out other books of his but I only got around to it this past year. Im currently reading Cat's Cradle but my favorite so far (other than Slaughterhouse-Five) is Breakfast of Champios.

For manga, I read A LOT of manga. Recently Ive been really into Tsutomu Nihei's stuff. After I read Blame! I really wanted to check out his other stuff, so recently I read Knights of Sidonia and what little there is of Tower Dungeon (I really recommend both, specially Tower Dungeon).

Im a pretty big fan of Yoshihiro Togashi (Yu Yu Hakusho and Hunter X Hunter) and I hadnt read his other series Level E so I finally got around to reading it and its very consistently fun, despite how short it is. Very weird and very funny.

This last year I also really enjoyed Happiness by Shuzo Oshimi and Claymore by Norihiro Yagi.

My favorite manga I read last year though was Shimeji Simulation, which is a bit hard to describe but its a surreal comedy about a girl who was a hikikomori and when she comes out of her room after a few years so she can go to highschool, she realizes she grew shimeji mushrooms on her head. Its such a beautiful work and its pretty short, theres nothing like it.

I could honestly keep talking about manga permanently so Ill just move on lol.

Shows/Movies

I dont really watch shows that much but last year I really enjoyed the Dungeon Meshi and Dandadan adaptations. Just generally really well made.

I also watched most of Gurren Lagann recently and I enjoyed it (still havent finished it, I have only like 4 eps left but Im terrible at finishing watching shows). I saw a lot of people say how life changing it was, including a close friend, but it honestly wasnt that big of a deal to me. I did like it but not in a life changing way, lmao.

I didnt watch as many movies last year but I did enjoy Nosferatu, Alien: Romulus, A Different Man and, above all else, the adaptation of Look Back. Thats probably become, if not my all time favorite movie, my second (right behind Perfect Blue).

[tordistic]

Show me your eddsworld lgbt headcanons(All characters) (Sorry for ask if you tired or something)

im gonna answer based of everyone i can remember rn

i was gonna answer w doodles but id rather ramble idk- and its fine plz ask me thangs 👁️👁️

edd is bi aroace cuz i like him and therefore he is just like me (fr). and im sorry but i see him and i picture my irls who are all cis man T_T thats the most cis man who ever cis-ed man

tom is trans ???-to-male. the- whatever he is doesnt exactly fit into the "binarism" of human sex. and when he was conscious enough of his own existence, he realized he felt more comfortable existing as a guy, and became a guy. I said so before, but he's been out so long he forgets about it lol. besides that, hes bisexual and objectum 💥💥💥 (that last part is probably canonical)

matt- i hauve no idea whats going on gender wise. either the most idiotic man when talking about identity and masculinity or transfem/transneutral in denial. bi or pan, the label does not matter, he would rather date ANYONE who is remotely interested

tord is in severe denial. he thinks everyone feels like masculinity is a burden, a curse, that everyone looks at girls not knowing if they want to be with them or be them. and no, he does not find men attractive and definitely would not make out with some guy given the chance.

(someone give her cat ears before she kills again)

hm.

id picture the neighbours in a really. REALLY toxic polycule. all of em gay + cis.

in "canon" (the comics) Edu dated Laurel at some point, and either they broke up or stopped cuz of moviemakers events. but I THINK it would be FUNKY if they broke off cuz Edu is gay and Laurel is transfem. we already know she has blue hair, therefore she has pronouns

both pilots are mlm and t4t and hate eachother. but theyre married. but also divorced. but also

the EVIL director is EVIL bisexual. larry is EVIL gay. they arent dating nor interested like that on the other

if i forgor anyone (which i did) uhhhhh theyre unlabeled lol

[prettygirlgerard]

🌎 OPERATION HOT CHIMP

For TOO LONG the DD fandom has been in shambles, ppl arguing spreading misinfo, straying from the original concept etc. Remember when we were supposed to make Nananana the most viewed video on Youtube, yea that didnt pan out did it.

Well I believe i have a solution....🤯🤯

July 26 is going to be a WORLD WIDE DANGER DAYS BLAST. We're going to post fics, hcs, art, cosplays, vids etc to show ppl that were back with a force. 💥🙌

Im setting some ground rules for this content and all DD content going forward. ive thought about them for a while and i think theyre fair. new rules for OPERATION HOT CHIMP are as follows,

🦍 No sayin you wanna fuck Tommy chow/lo mein, witch or that clown guy

🦍 Vayas not going to fuck you either so just let that one rest

🦍 OCs are fine but no more crossovers. i dont think sherlocks gonn show up in the zones to say "hmmmm i have a mystery for...............PARTY POISON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

🦍 OC names can only have 2 words, noone cares how many dracks Toxic Orgy Bomb Shit Chromatic Biscuits Pie has killed

🦍 Tbh OC names should be more original in general, theyve all got named like Titty Detonator, for exmaple mines called Ricky Bobby (my fav will ferell movie), its laid back, funny movie reference etc also hes a racecar driver like the real Ricky bobby

🦍 Dr. Death Defyings real name is not "Steve." Its charles

🦍 Power Pup is made from DOG FOOD not "grinded up exterminators"

🦍 No more sayin Kobra kid is 🇬🇧british. Tbh the royals probably died in the wars, and thats a huge part of the "Being british package"

🦍 If you write/draw stuff about the four you HAVE to include the girl. "i dont like her shes boring" idc, the girl is the center of dd, she keeps fun ghoul from doin stupid stuff like sticking his dick in the mailbox and yellin "FORGIVE THIS BITCH"

Rn ppl outside the dd fandom make fun of us, sayin "haha its the wierd sewer of the mcrmy."

Thats bc they see the DD fandom as 💥💥💣🤮🙄🙄😑😐💣 But with OPERATION HOT CHIMP, i know we can turn it into 💿💃🍡🦍👈⛽🍆🤯🛴💰🗿

Call it CODENAME GORILLA when your around non-DD ppl (normies). We're going to blow their minds with the biggest blast the MCRmy has ever seen🤯🤯 July 26, write it down 📝

No this is not a joke....someone needs to straighten things up around here....might as well be me🤌

As Ricky Bobby said shake....and BAKE🤛

shake and bake brotha 🙏🏽 u right about kobra kid not being British lol

[femkon]

writing bc i did (i just wanted to share this)

uhh. im just writing my bullshit bc im bored and i can guys. first ting is gonn be bout my weird god killer thing on janitor. like, i just pulled that shit out of my ass and now i have lore? what the freak

(the intended audience of this is either tumblr or my friends to be made fun of) (and maybe Ao3 for reasons)

ASSUMPTIONS TO MAKE UNLESS SPECIFIED OTHERWISE: every character is aroace pan-leaning unless said they fuck

so we gonna start with the rules of like the religion and shit!!! its called “Raynism” and is centered around these three gods and their children. the main gods are Kilun, Hilna, and Yali. they’re time god, planet god (bc there’s more than earth THANK YOU VERY MUCH), and life/death god. Kilun makes sure that everything is progressing fine on the worlds with intelligent life, Hilna creates the planets for said life or just for fun (usually taking around 5 millennia each), and Yali creating the life whether it be plants animals or aliens. they each have children (not really cause they didnt like do it with anyone. the kids just kinda appeared) for each little thing. i will make them up as i go along bc infinite children ig

and these children are called demigods (obvi) and can actually be killed unlike their parents bc slightly mortal. and bc of this possible death, there are some who rebel and become things known as “Guara/Guaru” (meaning god killer in the... ranyi language) (idk man) depending on the amount of demigods killed. Guara is one that has killed under 3 demigods. Guaru are over three. thats about it. they can also be mortals tho, ones that maybe take a guara(u) as a mentor and learn the magic n stuff. two main Guaru, Zanar and Thorlo. Zanar is just a little silly goober and loves pretending to be an Rayni (the worshipers of Raynism that make it to this version of heaven) (basically just angels) with the whole wings and purity, while actually being a black panther bastard who kills demigods for fun (and once got really close to killing Kilun. but like. thats a god. xey couldn’t kill it) because xey’re just that cool man. and the other. Thorlo, actually has honor and does it to like corrupt demigods and blah blah blah n stuff. they both have passionate lesbian sex bc i think i wanna give them female anotmy if any. there’s just a whole lot of sexual tension maybe. yeah, no one gets genetalia ive decided

also!!! just remembered an important fact!!! gender is not a thing assigned at birth to the gods and demigods!!! its completely chosen by the entity when they’re 100 years old!!! until then its they/it!!! i will now tell you the main fives pronouns bc im epic like that. Kilun (its/they/xem) (any other than he/she), Hilna (they/she), Yali (they/them), Zanar (xey/xem/xyrs) (included that last one bc sometimes i forget lol), and Thorlo (he/they). ive stripped them all of anything down there bc i decided they can decide if they wanna have it at will. they ever get a partner who prefers a peener? boom. they’re hard. want a coochie? they are the ocean. thank you for coming to my ted talk guys

just kidding, this rests for no one. especially not me. i wanna just like add important events to this. first one is creation of earth!!! and... we are literally an accident. like, Hilna was just fucking around and didnt mean for earth to foster life but the conditions were rlly good so Yali was just like “freak yeah” and threw some germs on here and aided with evolution a bit (bc we believe in evolution here guys!!!) and then there were humans. and it was like the first actual intelligent life to make stuff and not just be animals so that was cool. so they kept watch and then a whole bunch of bad shit started happening, like discrimination, slavery, captilism, wars, racism, naxis, pedophiles, necrophiles, werid people who do creepy things, hunting for sport, polution, corporations, and just general other bad things. and they were like “woah. thats weird. i thought these little guys were neat” and tried to kill humans, but they survived n shit and Hilna and Yali were like “???” and thats why shits fucked right now

urm anywaysssss, it’s 2 in the morning now bc i just bingewatched content for 2 hours due to not being able to fall asleep. back to events ig??? nvm i fell asleep and woke up at 5:30 to take a shower and get back to work!!! LETS FUCKING GO

so basically, this segment is about how Zanar almost killed Kilun. it was in the heaven-y part of the world and there are like shrines to different gods n stuff, the main biggest ones being to the og 3. and the 3 spend a lot of time in their shrine. so one day, Zanar finds Kilun in its shrine, observing a planet design that Hilna was making, and xey decide “y’know what? i should pretend to be a Rayni and sneak up this... one? idk what one” and just shifted into a Rayni, getting the whole angel vibes. so xey sneak up behind Kilun and kneel next to it, getting a look from it before getting some pats from it (bc it is very loving guys). and they stay there together for a few hours, before Zanar looks like xey’re going to leave and xey walk to the door, before locking and closing it, shifting into xry normal form. xry normal form is a fluffy creature with black panther markings, and xey got a tail, ears (on top of head, absent from sides), claws, and fangs!!!

so this thing sneaks up behind Kilun and bites into its neck, causing golden blood to start flowing out of the puncture marks, and also knocking it out. that may not be anatomically correct, but i dont care. these are MY characters, not YOURS. also im stupid. pls lower your expectations if u want this to be correct in any way shape or form. i dont wanna describe the rest of the scene in detail, but it basically just ends with Kilun’s body getting spread across a web like substance and having organs visible, skin turned out n shit. thats all for now until i get bored

guys... i got bored. time for another event <3 this one is gonna involve Zanar AND Thorlo bc ive decide they’re frenemies who maybe sometime go out for drinks and then have aggressive gay sex. Thorlo is bottom (power) and Zanar is top (not… power? idk the correct terminology). but the normal dynamic is that they kinda fight over which demigod who kills and maybe work together on tougher ones. and then they go out to a bar, Zanar drinks some fruity little COCKtail (emphasis on COCK) and Thorlo just broods in the corner sipping wine directly from the bottle. they would then go home and have (consensual) sex. that phrasing makes it sound like they live togteher. and now they will. they live in an apartment together and have two cats, Louie and Queen (louis mcclung and drama queen reference bc im gay???) who dont interact and are just kinda coexisting. also a dog named Layzie (guys i love shoving my commentary ytbr’s into a thing) (layze reference btw) who barks an awful lot.

i should prolly give yall (myself) a desc of these characters shouldnt i? Kilun, Hilna, and Yali are all just indescribable beings of light that manifest themselves as the most boring man you’ve ever seen. he looks like his name is kyle. but that’s just for earthlings!!! if your oc (this is an invitation to shove your oc’s in this pls bro) isn’t, make them just some guy from their planet. or not a guy. gender is a concept and their plans havent started. Zanar is, as previouly mentioned, just a black panther goober. by technicality, xey can be any animal and take on those traits, such as a coyote, shark, moth, goat, bear, or anything else! including other animals from other planets. Thorlo looks either like one of those edgy older man characters (long straight white hair, suit, scars, red eyes, kinda looks like a mafia leader) or a steriotypical transmasc (not saying this is what ftm peeps look like but you know people love stereotypes) (the fluffy brown hair, baggy clothes, neutral tones, earthy, this mf def has a fake tail). sorry for shit desc

new character alert!!! Junig (he/she) (mainly he) (she is used mainly by enemies)!!! demigod of water and to be more specific, rain/thunder and hes a bitch!!! theres some sympathy, but hes kinda an asshole :/ maybe gonna make him a bit homophobic n stuff, like a bully from your high school grown up. hes gonna be a dick to everyone except for Yali who he is immensely loyal to for reasons that make sense (they’re basically his parent bc as i mentioned demigods just kinda appear and dont have a parent? they still get raised based off who they were closest to when they appeared) (maybe including other demigods if theyre considered mature enough?)

clarifying the pronouns bc i will forget all about these if i dont. for gods and demigods: he (maybe she for rlly old demis who arent in communication with him and know him as she) Thorlo and Zanar: she bc theyre assholes (and ofc he uses the wrong ones for them too dont worryyyy)

so as i said, dickhead to everyone except Yali, who he’s loyal too. and i mean LOYAL. this guy would probably castrate himself for them. and like, good for him? it’s fully platonic bc theyre basic parent and child, you freak. def a one sided obsession tho. reverse boy mom if you know what i mean (cough, emotional incest, cough). Yali has no clue what they did to Junig tho, they’ve raised so many children that they kinda just forget about a lot of their children. bc that’s such a power move and they’re a power bottom (if they fucked) (these gods dont have sex) (theyre asexual beings what am i yapping about)

Yuna (he/they) is a demigod of poisonious plants on earth. there have to be so many specifics. anywayss, hes decent. not special or anything, hes kinda just there and does things. people on earth rlly like him tho bc why wouldnt you? hes done nothing wrong and is just a goober. i like to think he has one consistent form for all mortals; a completely black robe that covers his whole body and a hood over his head. he does not have a form and is just a swirling mass of shadows. very cool :D hes also known to kidnap cats (or cat-like creatures) if he visits a planet

im gonna add an example of what a mortal worshipper of Raynism is, taking one in specific named Vivi (any/all). all it is is being considerate and accepting of everything and everyone, other than those who cause direct harm to groups of people or creatures. politics cannot be swayed by Raynism, as being a Raynist means that you swear off such mortal coils as money and anything like that, they are not your priority. you can still have them of course, but it shouldnt be your aspiration to have the most. and you may still be involved in politics and things like that, but using your religion as an excuse isnt valid while having your beliefs be about acceptance

but these are the worship that happens for believers!!! making shrines in the fall months (using items such as flowers, various other plants, figurines, bones, photos of thing dear to you, and jewelry), praying to the (main) gods daily for luck and demigods for specifics, being vegan/vegetarian depending on how devoted they are, or at least think of the animal before eating the meat products, and meditation bc i think thats a thing that would be good for people

another demigod bc i love characters. Seraphyne (agender, just use name) is the oldest and original demigod. Seraphyne is a demigod of fire, to be specific the god of forest fires. Seraphyne is distant from every other god or Rayni, living in an place simply known as “the inbetween” that not many know how to get to. so Seraphyne spends all day in Seraphyne’s space, watching the planets and listening for prayers. none ever ask for a forest fire tho, so Seraphyne just spends the time preventing them from happening if they can. sometimes the fire is needed or too harsh to be stopped by Seraphyne.

Seraphyne, like Yuna, has a constant form with mortals, just a thing made of fire. like, genuinely, Seraphyne’s form is really just them walking around as a ball of flames contained by some straight-legged jeans and a checkered sweater-vest (Seraphyne’s preferred outfit, on occasions with reading glasses) (for the non-exsistant eyeballs) that dont burn for reasons. if they make sense or not is up to you.

i

i

i

anyway time for obviously tumblrcoded interactions so i can get attention!!!

Zanar: dont worry pookster, junig will have no clue what hits her

Thorlo: that doesnt mean you can hit her with a comically large hammer. she’ll be able to tell its you.

Zanar: :(

Kilun: i feel fine, i have no clue why you’re bringing me to the medics

Yali: Its just for your safety.

Medic: Oh-! My holiness’s, what makes you come to our fine clinic at this time???

Kilun: Some dude took my organs out *lifts shirt to reveal hollow chest with golden blood coating the cavity walls*

Medic: Goodness. *passes out*

Thorlo: *fighting and actually tying to show corruption and the flaws in what a demigod has been doing*

Demigod: maybe... maybe i was wrong...

Zanar: *fighting and literally making jokes when xey hurt a demigod and calling it names*

Demigod: bitch.

notes from goober interactions so far: Zanar fights with goofy weapons, such as the affermentioned comically large hammer, but could be such as a musical saw (or other musical weapons), comically large or small weapons of various kind, and maybe bare fists? Junig is a demigod, im thinking water based and just kinda a bitch, kicks puppies type evil. Kilun/Hilna/Yali do not feel pain and have no concern for their corporeal forms. demigods and everything else in this universe curse so so much. demigods hate Zanar, and that’s valid!!! also this is just a note from a thing i wrote, Zanar eats people. and enjoys fucking with peoples minds before they do so. characters use modern slang and tend to do so without noticing (they just like me frfr!!!)

[dr4cking]

hiyaaaa can I request a draco that hates everyone except y/n of course he’s so overprotective over her and so soft!?

The Only Exception.

masterlist

draco malfoy x reader | fluff | anon requested.

a/n : hii this is my first time ever writing a fluff because i was only good at writing dirty things lol but i tried so i hope this meets your expectations and thank you for requesting! <3

“get out of my sight, potter” draco shouted pointing at his best sworn enemy, harry potter himself. he walked past him not even glancing at him but bumped his shoulder on purpose making harry lose a little balance.

“oh get lost, malfoy!” harry clapped back after regaining his balance, hermione and ron already holding him by his shoulder preventing him from punching the blonded guy.

“what did you just say?! serpenso-“

“draco lucius malfoy!” draco throw his wand away as soon as he heard the familiar voice shouting at him from behind, his favorite voice.

“oh- hello y/n! h-how are you?” draco turns around to meet his lovely girl, his voice shaking nervously as he looks into her eyes but quickly laughed it off, harry potter scoffed at the scene in front of him before motioning his friends to follow him.

“dont think i didnt see what you were gonna do, draco. thats not a good idea, you know?” y/n pick up his wand from the floor and clinging onto his arm dragging him to their house.

“i know i know, im sorry y/n but he’s just so annoying and i cant stand him!” draco whines dramatically making y/n rolled her eyes at his usual obsession.

“i think you’re obsessed with him, draco. why dont you date him already, hmm?” y/n jokingly said, poking his cheek to tease him even more making draco scrunched his face in disgust.

“y/n please dont make me run to the bathroom and throw all of the food from my stomach into the toilet” y/n was laughing hard at his dramatic words holding her stomach, it secretly brings a smile and a blush onto his face but he quickly hides it.

as they making their way to their house, draco didnt stop rambling about potter and making fun of him giving the girl no chance to stop her laughter.

>>>>>

the next day comes and draco was sitting peacefully in the great hall with y/n sitting beside him, that was until blaise zabini, his best friend took a seat in front of them.

“hey mate, i was looking for this, can i have one?” blaise said as he snatches the chocolate frog from him and shoves it into his mouth, he hummed at the taste making draco gets angrier.

“piss off, zabini!” draco yelled out loud getting annoyed, his action enough to make all the slytherins turning at him. y/n beside him only can shake her head in embarrassment.

“draco be nice, look around,” y/n whispers to him, her fingers stroking his arms softly to calm him down.

“but it was my favorite y/n and this idiot just ate it!” draco protested at his best friend in anger who only give him a sly grin, y/n rolled her eyes and drag him out of the great hall, again.

“you can always have mine, draco. dont be so dramatic” y/n took out her chocolate frog from her pocket and open it feeding draco the chocolate who gladly eats it with a happy smile back on his face. she chuckles at his cuteness.

>>>>>

y/n walked downstairs with her best friend, pansy parkinson, she was looking for her man but he was nowhere to be seen.

“pans, you can go first to the class, i’m gonna look for draco before he’s gonna be late, i’ll meet you there” pansy nodded and leave but not before giving her best friend a kiss on the cheek making both of them giggles.

y/n look around to find a certain blonde, she hadn’t seen draco since the last class, she continues looking around to find him and thats where she found him, with the first year in front of him, she already knew where is this going.

“you better finish this by the end of the day, if not you know the consequences.” draco whispered to the first year giving him his homework, he threatened him while pulling out a few galleons to him, the little boy was shaking in fear and only nodded at his order.

what draco doesnt realize is y/n already stood behind him, tapping her foot and crossing her arms, draco froze at the tapping sounds knowing immediately who it was, he gulped before turning around.

“really draco? threatening the first year to doing your homework?” y/n turns around to leave him, disappointed with his way.

“wait- y/n im sorry, please!” draco grabbed her wrist, pleading at her not to leave him, she was still pouted at him.

“apologize.”

“what?!”

“apologize to this little boy over here and take back your offer, draco.” draco wanted to open his mouth in protest but quickly shutting it when he sees the seriousness in her face, he turns to the boy who was still looking at them in confusion.

“alright, im sorry little guy, my bad i guess?” y/n shot draco a disapproving look making him mutter a real genuine apology to the first year.

“okay, now give your galleons to him draco”

“but he didn-“

“draco you made this poor little guy traumatized” he sighed and placing his galleons on the boy’s hand making him smile at both of them.

“i’m sorry about him, okay? i promise i’ll make sure he wont get anywhere near you again” y/n smile at the first year and he nodded returning the smile and thanking her before he left.

y/n turned back to draco who is already frowning looking away from her, she chuckles and grabbed his jaw with her hand, pecking his lips trying to get his happy side back.

“dont do that again draco, in all seriousness.” draco could only nod at her.

“besides that, we could always have a reason to have study dates, right?” y/n winked at draco making him gives a cheeky smirk to her.

>>>>>

it was a nice day for draco, no potter no weaselbee, basically anyone hasnt step in on his way, yet. he was walking with a happy vibe through the corridor to find his favorite girl, excited to wrap the girl in his arms.

then he found her, her familiar hair color seems to be stand out in the middle of the crowd. but the only problem is, she isnt alone. what in the wizarding world is cormac mclaggen doing right now?!

draco hurriedly makes his way to the pair with jealousy bubbling up inside him and when he already stood behind cormac he pulls him hard by his collar causing him to fell to the ground making y/n screamed instantly at this but draco quickly get beside her and hug her by her waist.

“draco! why did you do that?! oh my god cormac, are you okay?” y/n asked the mclaggen boy worriedly, taking her hand out to help him up, he shots draco a death glare.

“oh please y/n he’s totally fine, he's just weak and dramatic to get your attention” y/n shakes her head at draco in disagreement, scolding him for his previous behavior.

“draco, are you mental? i was just asking y/n about this homework, c’mon man you seriously need to relax” cormac was totally annoyed by draco, anger radiates off of him.

“yeah i will relax once you disappear from our way, now shoo shoo” y/n cant help but stifled a laugh at draco, she gives cormac an apologetic smile and motioning him to leave.

“no need to be like that draco” draco’s hand never leave her waist as they made their way to draco’s prefect room.

“he was getting too comfortable with you” y/n disagrees and reassuring him that it wasnt his intention.

“you look so hot when you’re jealous draco” y/n chuckles putting her arm on his back returning the gesture, a blush tinted onto his cheeks.

“yeah? how about i show you what’s hot in my room, hm?” y/n smacks his head with her other hand, cant control her laughter anymore.

>>>>>

“y/n?” draco called out interrupting y/n who was reading him a book.

“hm?”

“i love you so much, thank you for putting up with me” a smile plastered at y/n’s face from ear to ear, her heart melting at his words, she put the book on the nightstand and turns back to draco cupping his cheeks in her hands, capturing his lips on her kissing him softly showing him her love that she cant even described, draco kissed her right back with the same passion, smiling into the kiss.

“you’re a prat, but you’re my prat.” and with that, draco knew he was falling so deep for her and he has no plan to stop it.

[shittyblogname]

Heyyy, i can i request a fic with phone guy x fem reader? Maybe a oneshot? Where the reader and him are still friends (secretly liking each other) and when he was about to get killed the reader finds him and tries to safe him? You know, that scene where phone guy is killed, instead of that the reader safes himm?

And sorry if i dont explain myself very well, english is not my first language but i tried😭

And you dont have to do it if you dont want to or dont feel comfortable with it, it was just an idea i had :)

oh geez, I literally had a nightmare about this once LOL

honestly the fourth call always sounds like it's him actually calling you to me, so I'll be doing that.

I wasn't sure how to write this? I mean, in the Audio you can hear (probably a Animatronic) pounding on the door, so, how would reader get in there? You get me? So what I did was give the reader a small window of time where they step away, hope thats fine lol (I couldn't come up with something better tbh)

Warnings: serious injuries, blood & Angst 

You waited for the phone to ring, you know, the typical night routine by now. Checking the cams on Foxy quickly became a pain and hearing Philip's voice always brought a certain calmness to your panicked buttom-clicking & light-checking. Even though they were recorded tapes, it still gave you a certain sense of safety that he was around, even at night. You've met Philip before, and he's quite the charm. Sometimes you wondered how he could be so chill talking about the Robots & incidents that occured at the place, or even how he made it through the first week? It was a mystery to you. By the time the Phone began ringing, you immediately picked up, excited to hear his ramble for tonight. Instead you were greeted by a nervous tone in place of the enthusiastic Hello's you were used to. You didn't interrupt him, he clearly was in distress. The banging boomed through the speaker, making you jump. By the time the classic chime played through you quickly got up, checking the cameras for the last time before putting the tablet down on the desk. Sure, you were nervous and never exited the office before during the night, but what you just heard wasn't some funny sarcastic "prank" from the guy you grew to be so attached to. He didn't mention a single thing about death, or that he is in serious danger, which amused you a little. Despite the circumstances Philip still tried to stay within company standarts with his words, turning his call into more of a silent cry for help. It was a gamble rather Bonnie would be right outside your door, in the hallway or in the back room with him, but that was a guess you were willing to take in order to check up on Philip. Even if you did see one, all you had to do was just stare at them right? They don't move when you look at them, so you hoped that in case Foxy jumped out you could use that to "stun" him. For a moment you even thought about going through Chica's side of the hallway, since she tends to be busy for quite a long time in the kitchen or restrooms. It would be better than running into Freddy or Bonnie right? But at the same time, you didn't really want to walk past Foxy and your time is probably limited. You pressed your face against the glass to see if you could catch any glimpse of Bonnie around before opening the door, and it seemed like the luck was on your side. The hallway was empty, only a eerie feeling & the cold creeping through. You did see Bonnie's shadow somewhere in the dining room before though, so he'd probably switch to the hallway in a bit. Scrambling through your pockets for the backstage key while running down the hallway, you quickly went past the Pirate cove, shivers running down your spine. There were pots and pans being smashed together in the kitchen, and Bonnie stood, seemingly lifeless, in the middle of the dining room. You didn't want to turn your back on these horrifying machines, but in order to unlock the door you had to. You put the flashlight you carried to the ground in order to shine at the Bunny, hoping that it would prevent him from moving. You were trembling, heartbeat throbbing in your ears. What if you're too late? You shook your head in disagreement with your thoughts, checking behind you one last time before going to stick the key into the lock. It clicked fairly loudly, much to your distress about Freddy hearing you. Since he was nowhere to be found you just assumed that he was going to pick up on audio clues. Entering the backstage room you pointed the light towards every corner, making sure that nobody was with you two before locking the door behind you. Placing the flashlight on the table, you rushed towards a suit sitting upright against the wall, kneeling down in front of it. You heard a splashing noise and looked down to your knees, only to find the jeans you wore soaking up the blood you were sitting in. You panicked, breath going faster. You gripped his shoulders, shaking the male. He was unconscious, not responding to any of the actions from you. Looking around the head of the mascot you caught a glimpse of where the bars ran through the mask & started pulling. Careful not to hurt Philip more than necessary you managed to get the Freddy head off, throwing it to the side to observe any wounds he might have. You got the flashlight from the table pointing towards him, revealing the horror of a mutilated face to you. Tears started stinging your eyes, desperate for him to wake up you begged & cried while pulling the suit off of his flesh, both of you covered in blood by now. The signature song starting to play in the background only made your fear worse. These Robots can't have a conscience, right? Why would they be programmed to horrify humans like this?! Your thoughts were interrupted by banging on the door, another pair of heavy steps getting closer to the backstage room. You shook the man by the shoulders again, hoping for just the smallest sign of him being alive while checking for a pulse, relieved to find that his heart was still beating. You pulled off the company phone that was attached to your belt, dialing the number of police & ambulance services. Squeezing the phone between your shoulder & ear while explaining the Situation to the operator and putting Philip into the recovery position, it was safe to say that the woman on the phone sounded quite scared. At first not willing to send paramedics into a situation like that, with the machines still roaming around. You furrowed your brows, yelling into the microphone that an employee is going to bleed out if they don't hurry the fuck up, which seemed to do the trick. "is there any way you can shut off the Robots miss?" she asked while giving you first aid advice, trying to keep her cool just as much as you. "No, they are in sort of a free roam mode at night. I-I can't do anything. If I go outside or even unlock the door they're gonna put me into a suit aswell." the woman on the other end hummed in agreement. "okay, the paramedics will arrive shortly. When they are at the establishment, you're gonna have to open the door." you rested your hand on Philip's shoulder, hoping that he knew that you're gonna stay with him no matter what. "how am I gonna know that it's the paramedics and not the Animatronics?" the lady informed you that they're going to tell you about their presence, and surely the Robots couldn't mimic their voices. Blood dripped off your elbow, the what was once white fabric clinging to your skin. The lady gave you last words of reassurance before hanging up, leaving you only with that terribly stupid song and your mutilated crush. Your mind started going to imagening all the different outcomes, praying that he wouldn't die in the Hospital, or how horrifying he's going to look after surgery. People are going to be scared of what was a very handsome young man, or maybe he'll be recognizable. Either way, you swore to be there for him, whispering silent hopes to yourself. Soon enough you heard lighter footsteps rushing through the restaurant, looking for the backstage door. You hesitated getting away from Philip, but you had to to unlock the door. Creeking it open by just a bit to check if any Animatronics were around, you guided the medics to you, watching them perform more first aid to stop the bleeding before lifting him onto a stretcher to transport him into the Ambulance. You were invited to come along, since you were the one with the most information right now. You were questioned by the police who arrived shortly after the medics did before joining Philip in the back of the EMS. You were offered a blanket which felt more like a towel, given they didn't really have spare clothes to give out on the go. You kept your eyes on Philip during the ride, thinking over the events that happened tonight, hoping that he's going to be okay.

[greeds]

CREAMY SWEET POTATO CARROT COCONUT SOUP (WITH AGED CHEDDAR BC I LOVE CHEESE SORRY)

1 sweet potata, diced

3 big ass carrots, chopped

1/2 tomata, diced

1/2 white onion, diced

2 large garlic cloves, minced (or chopped if ur like me and dont care enough to mince lord its so hard)

cooking oil so ur veggies dont stick to the pan + pot!

2 cups water (i think. i lost count help)

1 tbsp of veggie bouillon (i think! LOL)

1 400ml can coconut milk

handful of kale, roughly chopped

cheddar cheese, sliced thin for easy melting (omit if lactose intolerant sux 2 b u bruv)

spices: turmeric, cumin, paprika, nutmeg, dried parsley, salt, black and white pepper bc why not idek the difference between them man (sorry i dont measure this shit u gotta figure it out urself. fuck it we eyeball)

NOTE: if u dont have a BZZZ BZZZ handheld thingy to blend the soup at the end u might wanna chop n dice everything super fine so that its easier to "blend" by hand. we want this soup CREAMY. UNIFORM. GLORIOUS. SMOOTH IN UR MOUTH.

---

first ur gonna wanna take ur sweet potata and ur carrots and roast them a bit on medium-low heat. i did this in a pan bc i have an aversion to ovens i just hate waiting also that shit gets so hot help girl im scared! anyway u do this so it can be very soft and easy to blend in the pot, or not crunchy if u dont wanna blend ig

when the potata n carrot r soft, sautee the onion a lil bit in the pot on medium heat, then add in the garlic for another lil bit

once thats done add the potata and the carrot to the pot with ur water and veggie bouillon! also the tomata lol almost forgot her. add ur spices, mix, turn that shit up medium-high, put a lid on the pot n let it hang out

idk after like 5-10 min add the can of coconut milk, make sure to shake well. stir that shit up, it should be a beautiful turmeric yellow! let it simmer for however long ud like lol idk how this stuff works. another 5-10 min seems safe

when the soup is lookin good, BZZ BZZ blend it babey! give it a lil taste to make sure u added enough spices, and put some more if needed

add the cheddar cheese (or omit if god nerfed u at birth) and kale and turn off the fire. stir until the cheese is melted

taste the soup and again, if its lackin in flaveur add whatever da hell u want to it! chili powder is delishes with it, but my brother would die if i made it spicy so i added that to my bowl after

---

UM i added some cornstarch sometime after i put in the coconut milk bc i wanted it to be thicker, ig another solution would be to use more veggies! i only had 1 sweet potata and didnt wanna overwhelm the soup with carrot so this is how it went for me

served with buttered bread <3

[s0lar-ch3ri]

(serious post) talking bout things i need to.

alright, this isnt going to be some "oh haha funni" post like i always do. i need to speak out or it feels like no one else will. you can not read this if you want, i just want to talk about them. (organized into paragraphs) there will be triggering topics i'll speak about and ill try to trigger them appropriately.

theres a surplus of youtubers who react to "fat tiktok" and its never any positivity. these videos get hundreds of thousands of views, and im pretty sure no one sees whats wrong with it. i am considered to be in a "plus size" range, and the videos fucking hurt. its stupid because the whole idea of that side of tiktok is to show that being okay with not being barbie is okay, and its always judged negatively. no, im not fucking over reacting when theres videos talking about how that entire side of tiktok should be gone. yes, there are toxic parts on that side, but i dont tell you to get off youtube or whatever your on because something you like has a toxic part of it. its fucking stupid that these guys (its like all guys) think they have the right to look at these videos and call them cringe over and over and over and then think theyve made a good video or done a good job. i agree, promoting obesity isnt that good a thing, but dont shame the entirety of a community because one person did it. no one who has done these videos has tried to apologize if theyre being offensive, theyre just like "dont hate us if these guys are cringe lol". its not hard, this is just restating the idea of barbie bodies being better. its not hard to let people be happy with how they look. like i said, "fat tok" is not an angel and has problems which can be addressed but judging the full part and saying it should be gone as a whole is just fucking fat phobic. can we stop mixing bisexual and pansexual? they have different names for a reason. bisexual and pansexual arent the same and yet theyre still mixed FOR NO REASON. bisexual is where you feel attraction for 2 genders (thus the prefix bi which means 2) and pansexual is attraction is regardless of gender. my sibling is the main reason i want to talk about this, being bisexual and being pansexual arent the same. if your bi, that doesnt mean your pan and vise versa. i struggled with labels for a shit ton of 2020-2021 and even this year, and hearing labels made so people can actually make sense of how they feel and know theyre not alone (i feel like it for me) getting mixed around with each other hurts. to me, its erasing identities by just saying theyre one. idgaf if you or someone identifies as both, thats fine. saying theyre one in the same is not. i hate those memes of "girls vs boys". they arent even fucking funny, theyre just cringe sexist stereotyping "jokes" put out to be consumed and for those who watch or see them to believe that theyre good and funny and okay. they arent. stereotypes arent cool, going "haha woman stupid" isnt funny, shut up. the boys vs girls memes always make the girls do something "stupid" first, then shows the boys being chads or some shit. for example, that boys vs girls time machine meme. the girls always go to see an ancestor of theirs, while the boys go do some crazy shit in the past. you may think theres nothing wrong, but there is. the way its shown and made is to show that girls are weird but boys are cool. the entire idea of the joke is that girls are stupid. its with every topic these memes have that the girls are in the wrong because theyre dumb for doing this or that. i know what some people think: "oh, your biologically a woman, so of COURSE this isnt funny to you and your just taking offense cause your a drama queen" or whatever shit. the reasoning there is fucking stupid, me being a woman that takes offense shows the joke is offensive and shouldnt be made. also, i bet some guys with brains would find the jokes uncomfortable. sexism isnt funny to anyone but 60 year old boomers that make "i hate my wife" jokes. if your wondering why its not that many, im shortening it so it can actually post. the other triggers will be added in the reply to this, dw.

[flockofdoves]

made beef kidney with mushrooms and onions in a mustard sauce largely using this recipe last week!

added some cayenne

used some fresh button mushrooms in addition to the dried porcini bc i didnt have that much

i ended up doubling the amount of the creme fraiche and mustard sauce

i used a spicy dijon but also ground up a mix of black and yellow whole mustard seeds roughly along with some colmans mustard powder to give it a bit more texture and flavor

i dont really drink much wine and didnt want to waste opening a whole bottle just for this so i used some cheapo cab sauv merlot blend that came in tiny not even full serving bottles in a pack. maybe not the most economic by volume but worth it for how i use wine. also tbh i ended up liking just drinking the rest of the bottle so thats good too lol expected it to be more shit from reviews but im no sommelier so all the better i can enjoy it w/o being discerning

took out all the fat from the kidney then let it sit in milk in the fridge for 2 days (was gonna do one but then couldnt cook that night) it was so funny it was pink when i took it out even tho i rinsed it well before then

then i did the blanching with vinegar water as described in this recipe but then i couldnt really do anythin with it for a while anyway so i then soaked it in water with vinegar in it for like an hour or so on the counter afterwards too like id seen in other recipes

was kinda nervous when i started cooking it bc i remembered a thing i read from some julia childs recipe where she said you should cook the kidney whole so that the liquids dont all come out and just steam it but i just didnt know how to compromise that with other recipes saying to take out all the fat bc kidney fat increases the piss flavor lol. so a Lot of liquid came out and it def steamed a bit but i wasnt able to really slow cook it either so im sure it couldve been more tender if i could possibly find a way to balance both those needs or did a more slow cooking recipe but honestly it was barely an issue it still was plenty good imo as someone whos never had kidney before. recipes were making me so worried when they all hated on beef kidney as compared to other types of kidney meats

on a similar note ppl said that beef kidneys were much stronger flavored than other kidneys maybe besides pig and a lot of similar recipes said they would avoid beef kidney so that got me a bit worried about flavor too. especially when i read in one recipe to not trust recipes that tell you to cook in the liquids of the kidney instead of taking out the kidney and wiping out the pan or just cooking everything beyond the meat separately until the end. but since a lot of the liquids disolved anyway and i tasted it and honestly it was fine i just trusted this recipe and i dont think the flavor was too strong or anything even though i didnt cook it separately

as for the potatoes i used this recipe

and i kinda wish i had gone with my gut and avoided putting in the onions and garlic right at the beginning

the potatoes were very nicely crispy but the onions and garlic got absolutely burnt to a crisp (was not a problem with my oven temperature! i have a second thermometer to check that)

if i did this again i’d put the onions like idk maybe halfway through and the garlic only right at the end

but yeah!!! it turned out good! excited to finally have used up all the organ meat i got on sale literally a year to almost a year and a half ago that i froze and then forgot about bc i got so busy and didnt have the time to figure out something fun to do with all of it. also i really like the creme fraiche i wanna use the leftover of it on stuff this week

[thegeminisage]

me sighing and rubbing my temples ok if you’re not watching but wanna know, here’s what happened on supernatural. it was a bad episode

sam, dean, and jack are the only people left in the world

dean makes it back to hastings and tells sam and jack that cas died to kill billie and save dean by summoning the empty, but he leaves out the love confession (called this in my fic, thank you)

he didn’t change out of the jacket until a timeskip later

jack cried and prayed to cas but there was no answer

LOTS of pretty horrifying/sexy shots of the world being empty. like, covid pandemic lockdown footage. that chilled me right down to my bones

at some point dean finds a dog and he’s SOOO happy like this one little dog is a win but then chuck shows up and vanishes the dog too

and theyre like ok chuck what do you want us to do kill each other? fine we’ll do it but put the world back and put cas back and chuck was like lol no

so then back at the bunker a few days later dean’s phone rings and it’s CAS’S PHONE and MISHA COLLINS says dean im outside im hurt please let me in and dean RACES to the door and then it’s fucking LUCIFER

who god busted out of the empty (THATS BREAKING CANON GOD ISNT SUPPOSED TO BE ABLE TO DO THAT) to come and steal his “death book” - death has a book for everyone telling how they die, god included, and only death can read it. that book COULD kill chuck or at least say how he dies but none of them are death and death just died so lucifer brought a reaper, killed the reaper to make the reaper death, and the reaper opened the book and read it

oh yeah michael survived somehow but adam is dead so it’s just michael in there. they tried to get michael to read the book earlier and he couldnt lol

then lucifer KILLED THE NEW DEATH and took the book so he could take it back to god

and lucifer and michael fought and lucifer called him a cuck twice. yes really. he mightve called cas a cuck i wasnt paying attention

anyway, then michael stabs him, so the book is open, but nobody can read it

sam says he used the book of the damned to find a spell in the book that can kill god, so they go to the side of this extremely beautiful lake which is very sunny and filmed very poorly and do this spell, and chuck shows up and stops them and beats the shit out of them

there’s a long sequence where chuck beats them up and tells them over and over to stay down and they wont do it. they keep helping each other up. on paper this would have made me cry but the execution was a bit awkward. i think of the buildup in swan song and the beautiful music and the camerawork and how tense i felt in a similar sequence when lucifer was killing dean and i just...this sequence REALLY coulda been it, god telling them to stay down and them refusing, but it wasnt

anyway jack shows up! it turns out he’s been absorbing power from everywhere all episode. from plants, from michael and lucifer, and now from god trying to kill the winchesters. so he takes god’s powers and makes god human (also called this in my fic)

and it turns out that the way god will die doesnt matter because one day he’ll simply get sick and die forgotten like other humans. which was admittedly sexier than outright killing him

dean did say “you think we’re gonna kill you well thats not who we are” in a callback to cas’s love confession and i maybe died a little. gotta take my joy where i can get it

then jack put everyone back (called that too) and said he wasn’t coming back to the bunker (also called that ugh my mind) but that humans should believe in themselves instead of him, because he believes in humanity

then there was a montage of all the cast and side characters over the years over some classic rock

THEN we cut to sam and dean in the bunker saying now that chuck is no longer writing their story, theyre free, and the story can go wherever they want. and dean puts his arm around sam and they get up and walk away

with a slow pan to the table they were at, with their initials and mary’s name and jack’s name and CASTIEL’S NAME!!! carved into it

and then the credits

supposedly that was the SEASON finale and the next one is the SERIES finale but ??? i honestly dont know what they could have left to do that would fill 45 whole minutes. i know misha collins isnt coming back (and FUCK them for cas baiting me) so like...aside from sam and eileen getting back together ??? who knows! they literally wasted so much time just saying that chuck had all the power and there was nothing anyone could do and then pulled that outta their asses like. i know every episode cant be swan song but swan song was beautiful and meta and made me feel. this episode made me numb :/

[sanchoyo]

Looks like you’re gonna have to gush some more cuz I meant in general uwu🌸

🌺😌🤟 Always happy to! Okay here’s just some General bnha Thoughts ™ Mostly Lov centric. You asked for them, and you said GUSH about them, so here’s. A Lot! :)

This isn’t a lov one but it’s really funny so I thought I’d put it out there:

-when bnha was first gaining traction on tumblr, it was all art of Tsuyu. I have no idea why. People were talking about the funky frog lesbian superhero anime. Maybe it was just the people I was following, maybe it was a general trend, but I LOVED her design!!! my fav color and frogs r super cute!!! And I already loved superhero media, so I was like. I’ll watch it. For Her. SO. FROPPY IS THE REASON I WATCHED/READ BNHA. I went in thinking she was the protag and I was sooo confused when Izuku was... tbh I still think it’d be more interesting if she was lmaooo aus where? ...seriously if anyone has good aus where this is the case send them LOL

-I don’t actually feel that bad abt what Shigaraki’s doing. I still feel bad for him. I’m this post. yes im an apologist. its not my fault hes sexy and has been running around shirtless. hes a lesbian icon like thor is. I want to touch his hair. hes never done anything wrong in his life. he could kill all might, deku, bakugo, whatever, I’d still be sayin this. I don’t feel bad for gt. like. was anyone genuinely attached to him? lmao

-well u know how spinner’s quirk is just sticking to things? We haven’t seen him use it in canon except like, (1) time iirc?? I think this is probably bc he’s embarrassed about it even in front of the league... I loooove the idea that he gets more comfortable with it around them :”) and also how shigaraki. um. does that falling asleep thing while standing up with his eyes open, canonly? (which I still love lmfao) Imagine someone in the league walking in a dark room, turning on the light n just seeing. Spinner upside down, stuck to the ceiling asleep bc heat rises and its Warmer Up There. (cold blooded thing like tsuyu?? come ON give him a big fuzzy coat and scarf...) and Shigaraki in the center of the room, slouched but still standing, eyes open and motionless. Theyre both sleeping. Whomever sees it just...slowly walks out. LMAO

-Toga roller derby au. No deep thoughts I just think she’d be good at it. 

-Toga 100% is a social butterfly and could befriend anyone if they didn’t just judge the fact she was trying to stab them smh :/ (ok but seriously anytime I see cute friendships with her n the other kids im like :) aw. I feel like her and Camie...would be good friends. Camie feels chill enough to be like ‘ok whatever thats totally fine I forgive you!!’ LMAO we love airheads here)

-HOW DID TOGA GET SO GOOD AT FIGHTING? We know she’s been on the run since middle school or so, but good enough to pin Deku down after he’s been formally trained at a ~hero school~ for a while? (she pinned him TWICE I think, once when his arms were messed up, but, the other time as Camie, so? AND THEN WAS ONE OF THE 100 PEOPLE TO GO THRU TO THE 2ND ROUND OF THAT? even tho she didn’t bc she had to leave) good enough to beat Aizawa in a fight and stab him? A professional hero and teacher for YEARS? Is that seriously just street training??? Can people acknowledge how amazing her combat skills and reflexes are??? More Toga appreciation when?? Also her backstory??? SO subversive and incredible, hate when people reduce her to just a ~typical anime yandere~ :/

-Tomura doing stuff with his hands/fingers to train his quirk!!! And to learn to be careful with it!! obv I’m a Big Fan of him playing piano to do this and video games are prob the canon answer, but like, guitar or any stringed instrument that requires Hands would work too. Or knitting/sewing? EMBROIDERING? ??? Please, let me give you the mental image of him knitting aggressively while mentally scheming, watching a twitch streamer or smth too while doing it. (Doing stuff with your hands is a great way to let your mind come up with creative stuff, that’s how I come up with writing/drawing ideas 70% of the time)

-Tomura actually PREFERS cutesty, relaxing games. I mean, he does fighting and bloody stuff irl, games are a way to relax...he’ll play shooters and gta type games with The Lads, but. on his own?? animal crossing. pokemon. kirby games. mario. zelda. BIG ZELDA FAN (not saying this bc I, personally, am biased, but,) slime rancher, stardew valley, funny simulator games... he really enjoys those :”) God forbid he has a kid bc they’re 100% getting named after a viddy game character unless someone can talk him out of it LOL. Toga and Tomura are that animal crossing /doom meme where she’d be asking for doom and him asking for animal crossing :”)

-Bits and pieces of Before are kinda stuck in Kurogiri’s brain, but like. mostly useless stuff the doctor didn’t care about removing. Like, types of clouds. So Tomura kinda picks up on stuff like that. He can just look at clouds and tell you what type they are because Kurogiri used to take him up to high places in the city and point them out to calm Tomura down from a panic attack when he was younger. He can tell you if the sky looks like it’ll rain with a 80% accuracy rate too. 

-Kurogiri left food out for kitties in the alley beside the bar. They weren’t allowed in for Health Reasons (it IS a bar with sanitation standards!!) And Tomura really wouldn’t stop it or encourage it either way so long as Kurogiri did his job, but occasionally would stand outside with Kurogiri and just watch the kitties from a distance. If any approached he’d go back in (lowkey afraid he’d hurt them by touching them :( ) They kinda kept that between them tho, bc they both Know AFO is a big bag of dicks and no fun

-people have pointed out how similar aizawa and tomura look. this was 100% the intention. tomura has a hatecrush on him. THIS IS SO FUNNY AND HORRIBLY AWKWARD FOR KUROGIRI LMAO

-Sako??? Mr. Dramatic?? Opera fan. Drama kid. Like, obviously, but. Really. He is. I feel like he can speak a dozen languages. I also feel like he used to be an overachiever but got too ambitious. He was def some kind of leader at one point of a diff Group or something that fell apart. I LOVE how creative he is with his quirk and the magician theme??? incredible. I don’t show him enough love but I Love Clowns :o)

-I don’t care what their canon heights are. Spinner and Dabi? short kings. My height hcs are (tallest to shortest) Kurogiri, Twice, Sako (who also has heels on his boots and a tall hat, keep in mind), Tomura, Magne (Tomura and Magne are about the same height imo) Toga, Spinner, Dabi. LISTEN. Dabi has short energy. Sorry. it’s true tho

-This is a semi-popular hc I think bc I KNOW I’ve seen it before, but Dabi having Terrible Vision and needing glasses is so so good. (seriously, with burns THAT close to his eyeballs, how could he not?) 

-he tries to be a tough loner coolguy. you’d think he’d smoke, but I hc his ‘weak constitution’ comes with weak lungs (esp from years of a flame quirk?? inhaling smoke over so much time is SO bad for you, most people who die in fires actually die of smoke inhalation...) so he’s got like, an inhaler, can’t smoke, actually gets carsick, needs glasses, overuses quirk to save friends constantly, likes napping, a little awkward and rude. Tomura put him in charge of the vanguard so he’s smart, and good with strategies too, like a nerd. this is the Dabi I wanna see, not the popular fandom version of him tbh also step on hawks one more time sir :”)

-I wish all the lov fics weren’t?? villain!deku like I said earlier, but also, chatfics? I have nothing against them but most of them are just a bombardment of Memes with NO PLOT!!! Listen. text/chatfics CAN have plot and be an interesting way to tell a story. I almost want to write one just to show what I mean...

I know I’ve said I like spinaraki and blackmagic, but I am a multishipper, so a few ships I don’t talk about that I like that involve the lov in some way:

-toga/any of the 1A girls??? or Camie??? super interesting. ALSO in the radio drama, bakugo’s voice actor said Toga was his favorite girl??? so?? bakugo/toga ?? I WANT TO SEE IT. but specifically my fav dynamic with her is when someone ELSE is the one to like her first, it’s what she deserves.

-Kurogiri/aizawa/mic?? any variety of that is also 👌🏻 I also kinda wanna see kurogiri/all might bc. Dads. COME ON. they bond over ‘well, I raised him, and you want to have a part in his life now?? ok. earn it. prove it. I’ll screen you first’ or something LMAO they’re both genuinely concerned for the boy, and SOOO biased. let them bond.

-WAIT WHERE IS THE MIC/COMPRESS CONTENT. THEYRE BOTH DRAMATIC. ENEMIES TO LOVERS?? HELLO??? SOMEONE?? ANYONE. rarepair hours

-giran/twice is cute. like he was hyping him up so much and so ready to go save him...

-dabi/magne where is the content. when. why not everywhere??? I’ve also seen magne/compress which was cute!! or twice/magne? they’re the big sibs of the lov...

-dabi/spinner?? come ON dabi could get over his learned biases and spend time with him and they could hold hands. I want them to.

-dabihawks. Obviously bc the Drama. yes even still, don’t @ me. (also, shigahawks, seen some REAL interesting fics with it tbh) or spinahawks?? adding hawks to a ship is like adding extra chili powder. makes it SPICY dramatic)

-nine/tomura don’t @ me once again. both kinda afo’s playthings, nine obviously was the test for tomura’s new upgrades...they both love their friends...That Scene in the Flower field </3 hmmm tragicships are fun.

-tomura/mirko. more enemies to lovers. big fan of her and bunnies. remember when he wore bunny ears in bnha smash. (ok its crack but. CUTE.) 

-I’ve also seen shiganatsu and shigafuyu and I’m like. these are cute, but also Dabi’s reaction always makes me cry laugh. so good.

-MOST EVERYONE IN THE LOV IS LGBTQA+!!! heres my personal headcanons:

Toga: pan or bi (CANON BASICALLY)

Magne: transwoman (CANON BABEY) bi, leans towards men. (her crush on dabi in bnha smash... uwu content where)

Shuichi: gets sooooo flustered canonly, I think he’d go for the first person Who Hit On Him (I can see him being the target of those mean pranks where someone says ‘my friend likes you!!’ and the friend is like ‘eww!!’ :(((( ) he’s super hesitant for romance, lots of repressed stuff. gay but takes sooo long to realize it bc he thinks most women are conventionally pretty Aesthethically, feels obligated to Like Them, but has bad self esteem so never goes after them, then only likes (1) guy so hes like?? is this allowed?? is this allowed???? (HES LIKE. IN LOVE WITH SHIGARAKI)

Dabi: bi but rly hasn’t ever gotten to date anyone, so he’s actually more reserved about it and while he’ll tease, he absolutely is absent and kinda oblivious (again, I KNOWWWW bnha smash isnt canon, but. my god. when magne is hitting on him and he Just Doesnt Understand.) also hes ace

Tomura: doesn’t care. (just prob says ‘its whatever’) trans/nonbinary (i’M NOT PROJECTING, BUT. :’/) probably goes with like, the label queer if any but doesn’t care much for labels

Kurogiri: bi??? kind of??? I say kind of bc well, I hc U Know Whom as bi, I feel like thatd carry over but he’d be really avoidant to date anyone bc hes gotta Watch His Kid u know? this is gonna sound surprising but I think he’d be the type to be like ‘ok we can have a one night stand/fling BUT it cant get personal bc I have a Job to Do for my Son so don’t get up in your feelings’ and act a little coldly at first or very ..not personable... depending on who it was he’d prob turn around eventually, esp if that person valued his feelings/job :”)

Sako: that mans Not Straight. I hc him as gay and also trans :3c

Twice: Bi and HAS dated prob more than anyone else in the league imo, super comfortable with his sexuality and supportive of everyone else’s :)

ok that’s about all I can think of atm, come back in 5 minutes and my brain will refill with lov headcanons :3 thank you for asking!!

[kalypsichor]

and they were quARANTINED [a beatles fic] - ch 1

summary: George takes a shit. Ringo braves a trip to the tescos and loses a bit of his soul. John harrasses the general public and Paul’s just trying to get them home before they kill each other. All while a virus tears the world apart.

warnings: CRACK (not cocaine), geo’s bad potty habits, ringo’s copious use of emojis

so, this is different... but i’ve always been a crack fic writer at heart. this is the result of being quarantined myself due to COVID-19. i’ve been seeing so much fear and frustration and hatred that i just wanted to write about it kinda cathartically. enjoy!

Unfortunately, George doesn’t realize that they’re out of toilet paper until after he’s taken a shit.

“Fuck,” he mutters. “Ringo?”

No answer.

“Ringooooooooo. RINGO!!!”

George’s legs are starting to lose feeling. He bounces them up and down a bit and the motion almost makes him drop his phone in the toilet.

“RICHARD FUCKING STARKEY!”

There’s the sound of footsteps and then a pause before Ringo answers.

“What’s up?”

“What took you so long?”

“Had my headphones in. Sorry I couldn’t be at your beck and call, O Lord of the Loo.”

“SHUT up. Look, do we have any more loo roll?”

A pause. “Why, are we out?”

George rolls his eyes so hard he sees stars. “No, I’m askin’ for the banter.”

“I’ll go check. Don’t move!”

George can almost see the shit-eating (heh) grin on his mate’s face as he walks away. With a sigh and some choice curse words that would make Louise cry, George pulls out his phone again. Opens Twitter. Sees yet another tweet from that spraytanned clown across the pond. Closes Twitter and contemplates deleting it. After about three rounds of this, Ringo comes back and knocks on the door.

“We’re all out. Got you some tissues, though.”

Krishna help me. George tips his head back against the wall and thumps it a few times for good measure.

“Thanks,” he says flatly. “Could you- ?”

The door opens just a smidge before he can finish talking there’s a flying blur of Kleenex box, a blinding pain in the side of his head, and a sickening crACK—

***

“I’m really sorry,” Ringo says for the millionth time, hovering over George as he examines the spiderweb of cracks on his phone screen. George huffs. He wants to be mad, he really does, but Ringo’s face is doing that stupid thing where his eyes are very, very blue and droopy and his teeth are worrying his bottom lip and it’s obvious that he’s genuinely remorseful and—fuck, he’s got it bad.

“It’s fine,” George insists, even though he can hear his bank account having a fit. “Piece of shit phone, anyway. And look, it still works!” Very shittily, his brain adds, but that’s what you get with a five year old phone.

The older boy’s eyes still have an unconvinced, sad look about them and George wishes he could kiss it away. No homo, though.

“How can I make it up to you?” George’s brain does a slutdrop into the gutter. “I’ll… I’ll get the groceries! How ‘bout that?”

“NO!” Scrambling off the couch, George just barely misses smacking noses with Ringo. “What about the… the virus?”

“I’ll wear a mask and all. Wash hands for twenty seconds, stay six feet away from people… am I missing anything?”

“Yeah, the quarantine bit.”

Ringo snorts and puts a hand on George’s arm. “Quit your worrying, Geo. I’ll be fine. Haven’t John and Paul been out all day?”

***

John and Paul want to go the fuck home. They’d walked all the way to a new art gallery opening only to find out it was cancelled (“Why didn’t you check Google?” “Why didn’t you?”). And now, both being tired as hell from their long trek, they couldn’t even flag down a single cab to take them home.

“This is the worst thing ever,” John cries, flopping his entire body down on a park bench. Paul rolls his eyes and lifts up John’s stupidly long legs so he can sit down as well.

“People are dying, John.”

“I feel like I’m dying.”

“John.”

“Okay, fine, maybe I’m being dramatic. But this stupid… thing… is fucking up all our plans!”

“It’s not fucking Voldemort, you can say the name.”

“Alright, fine. Coronavirus. CORONAVIRUS. You happy, Paul?”

A woman hurrying by shoots them a wide-eyed, nervous look and crosses the street, tugging a little boy by the hand.

“... bitch.”

“Jesus, John.” Paul pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’d do that too if some rando was shouting in the streets.”

“Yeah, but she didn’t hafta shoot that nasty look at us… did you see that? Paul?”

“Hold on, hold on.” His phone is vibrating in his pocket and he fumbles to pull it out. “Your stupid legs are in the way.”

John huffs and makes a show of wiggling said legs, almost kicking Paul in the face. Still, he tucks them to his chest (flexible, Paul thinks and then instantly regrets) so that Paul can take out the buzzing rectangle.

--

bongo: do u or john want anything? 🤔🤔

bongo: like groceries

bongo: going to tescos

Shouldnt you be quarantining?

bongo: ur literally at an art museum 😂

It’s a gallery

And it got cancelled :/

bongo: oop sorry m8 thats tough

bongo: srsly tho whaddaya want

We need more vegetables. Carrots, etc

--

“Tell him to get cornflakes,” John says, peering over Paul’s shoulder. He’s sat up and practically draped over Paul’s lap. Paul sighs and shoves his legs off, ignoring the indignant squawk the other boy makes when he almost falls off the bench.

--

Also that cornflake cereal stuff

bongo: k

bongo: tell john i said hi

Heyyyyyy rich wots up

Paulie’s being a bitch he pushed me :((((

Why is his auto caps on lsdnfol

--

“Give it back!”

“Ow! Ow stop hitting me Jesus fuckin-”

--

Sorry that was john

bongo: yeah i could tell lmao

bongo: where are u guys??

Stuck at some park. Can’t get any cabs home

bongo: well duh coronavirus 😷😷😷

bongo: bad time to be a cabbie man 😔

Yeah yikes

Pick up some rice for george too

And hand sanitizer

bongo: ill try but twitter says handsan itizer is going fast

bongo: what the fuc why did it space like that

Lol

bongo: oh also

bongo: geos being a mother hen and making me wear a face mask

bongo: u know where they are?

Second drawer down in the bathroom, behind the rubber gloves

bongo: … how did u reply SO fast

Uh i know where things are in our flat? Like a normal person?

bongo: thats sus but ok

bongo: wow theyre actually here

bongo: okay imma head out before it gets dark

What’s after dark? Zombies?

bongo: u never no

bongo: *no

bongo: FUCKING *KNOW

Nice

Okay stay safe ritch

bongo: 😘🙃👍🏼✌🏼✌🏼🌈🌟🥦🥦🥦☮️

***

Ringo has never seen this many people at Tesco in his entire life. Two grown men are having a full on argument in the pastries. A harried-looking dad almost knocks Ringo into a rack of Twinkies, pulling along two screaming kids with one slung on his hip. And… is that person actually wearing a Hazmat suit??

“This is insane,” Ringo mutters to himself, slightly muffled due to the face mask. He just needs to find the loo roll and then he’s going to yeet outta here ASAP.

Okay, hygiene aisle… here we g—what the—

The entire aisle is empty.

It’s like a goddamn Old Western. Just add a cow skull… cue the tumbleweed… and it would be perfect.

Not for the first time that day, Ringo sends a prayer to whoever is listening above. There’s got to be something left. He walks down to the end of the aisle. Walks back. Jumps a couple times to check if there’s anything on the top shelf. Sincerely hopes no one just saw him do that. Finally, shoved at the very back behind a couple of Always boxes, Ringo digs out a dusty as shit six-pack of toilet paper.

Well. It’ll have to do.

As he’s walking to the check out lines, a woman drops her bottle of hand sanitizer. It rolls across the floor in a perfect arc and Ringo scoops it up before it can get too far.

“Oops, you dropped this!” He says cheerily, handing it to her. Well, trying to. The woman makes a strangled noise in the back of her throat, physically flinches away from his outstretched hand, and almost drops the rest of her groceries. Before Ringo can react, she’s disappeared behind the produce aisle.

Ringo’s arm falls to his side. He stares at the space where she was just a second ago and holds in a scream.

“More for us, I guess.”

***

By the time Ringo reaches the flat, he’s ready to never see another person again. He trudges right past George in the kitchen, dropping the groceries on the table with a thwack. John hums a greeting to him in the living room and offers him a biscuit.

“No thanks,” Ringo says. He faceplants into the couch.

Something clinks onto the coffee table. Well, coffee table is one way to put it; it’s more of a hunk of stone from back when Paul thought he was going to be the next Michelangelo and get really into classical sculpture. It now sits in the living room and primarily holds George’s textbooks, plus takeout for whenever they don’t feel like cooking (which is all the time), so you can see how that panned out for Paul.

“Tea for you,” George says. He plops onto the floor between the couch and the table and runs a friendly, comforting hand through Ringo’s hair. Ringo practically purrs, leaning into the touch, and George feels his heart melt and trickle through his ribs. “You okay?”

“I’ve lost all faith in humanity,” Ringo mumbles into the cushion. John reaches over and pats him on the back.

“Don’t worry, Ringo. There won’t be any humans to have faith in soon.”

George throws a packet of sugar at John who dodges it, snickering. Ringo groans and tries to sink even deeper into the couch.

And that’s when they hear Paul scream.

[we-want-mini-mini]

Since I have no self restraint, I’m writing another prompt/one shot.

Essentially, normal girl Lia (or some OC) whose a big fan of DC comics and the like ends up in a weird inter dimensional accident and ends up in the DC universe (it can be a mix of canon because fuck canon, up to you).

But, where did Lia end up exactly? Fucking Gotham.

The moment she realizes this is decides: Nope. Nah. Nada. No sir-y. This is NOT happening. Fuck this. I might end dying, or, worse, BECOME A FUCKING MAIN CHARACTER IN THE BAT CLAN. NAH. HELL NO.

Lia decides that, no, she will not involve herself in the Bat Clan/Wayne’s at all. Nope. Nah. Too much drama. Too much angst. Too much fucking skin tight suits and my poor Pan heart can’t TAKE all the HOT, RIPPED hero’s like what the fuck.

Now, this can play out in a variety of ways:

Lia is, say, around the same age as one of the Batboys. It can be any of them, up to you. Now, she some how ends up in Gotham Acdemy and begrudgingly befriends them. Cue angst (especially if its Jason. Considering in canon, if Jason survives he becomes Red Robin thats all I know lmao). If Lia is friends with the second Robin, it’d bring up the deliemma of: does she tell him that he’s gonna fucking die and then come back to life. Oh and, she’s actually from an alternate world were everyone thats like a superhero/vigilante is a fictional character. Honestly, if done well, can definitely stir the feelings of the poor saps who read the moral deliemma of Lia. Now, who is Lia? Someone who doesn’t want to get involved. If she avoids Jason in the beginning, does she have doubts and wants to warn Batman of Jason impending death or not? Like, that sort of shit panic attack inducing. There’s a lot of things you guys can do to torture not only Lia, but also the readers who might be like: “TELL HIM! TELL HIMMMMM!!!” or, “fuck, even I don’t know what I’d do” and etc. There’s a lot of leeway.

They are grown, and are in college (let’s say the events of Death in The Family happened and everything surrounding Red Robin striking out to find Bruce whose lost in time). This Lia is much older, recently graduated from college and currently interns for Wayne Enterprises. See, Lia is just another intern in a global colgomerate cooperation, there’s no way she’d ever run into any of the Wayne’s. None at all. But. But. She does. Some how she becomes the Executive Assistant to Tim (he once saw how she managed an entire fucking department’s schedule even though a group of people spontaneously quit. She was able to somehow salvage that shit in under three hours. And, Tim might or might not have fallen slightly in love with her—). Lia, now, a fresh 20-something year old, is now the Executive Assistant to another 20-something year old who happened to run one of the most rich and powerful companies in the entire world holy shit. Now, we follow the adventures of Lia, whose now one of the most powerful persons in the entire company (and proxy the world, I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️). Lia, let’s say, is a fucking god at manipulating people, making connections, accounting and management, and also a Very Tired Recently Graduate of GU. She, cannot, and will not deal with the constant bullshit that the Bats pull regularly. So, Lia can either passive aggressively hint that, yeah Tim, you definitely got that broken arm from a golf accident. Oh hey, I also heard the Red Robin foughy Killer Croc and also sported a broken left arm like you! What a coincidence, right? And she’d say this with a straight face. Tim knows that she knows, and Lia knows that Tim knows and yeah. Alternatively, she could outright tell him: “look, Tim, I swear to god, if you put off another meeting without a day notice just because some gang member got the better of you.” “Wait, gang member—?” “—do NOT interrupt me. Look, I know Bruce Wayne is Batman. Not the whole, ‘Bruce Wayne and Batman are the same person! The butts match!’ type of thing. I know he is Batman, you Red Robin, Dick Grayson is Nightwing, Red Hood is the weirdly alive Jason Todd, etc etc. There’s no point in feigning the fact that I don’t know. Because, I do.” They stare at eachother for a bit, and Tim falls just a little more in love. “How... Actually it’s dumb to ask you how you know, but, how long?” “Good tactic to ask me how long I’ve know instead of how I know. But, to answer your question: I’ve know since I was around...” THE FRAME FREEZES now, should Lia say 8, since, technically, she’s know since she was 8 that Bruce Wayne is Batman, considering the whole parallel universe thing. Or, does she say 18, the age in which she arrived into this world? Now, that decision can prompt many things to happen. For one, if Lia says 8, Tim is gonna be so awestruck and also be dry curious. If 18, Tim is still amazed (that she knows at all). Either answer would also illicit this response: “...you’ve known for so long, yet never told anyone?” Lia shakes her head. “You guys have a secret identity for a reason. Plus, I’m not in the business of becoming a vigilante or whatever. I’ve tried my best to steer clear of all of that, in all honesty.” “Huh. Makes sense. Wait. Then... why did you start working at WE, if you knew our identities?” Lia stares at him like he’s grown three heads. “Dude. This is WE. One of the most powerful companies out there, why wouldn’t I work here? But, the ither fact of the matter is that I didn’t expect to become your fucking Executive Assistant. Like, I couldn’t just deny the offer, my mother would’ve disowned my ass the second she heard I turned down such a prestigious position.” Lia shuddered. “Fuck, I can hear her curse me out in like, five different languages.” Let’s also say, at one point or another, Lia’s mother arrives, and say, is the most terrifying person Tim has ever met (and Tim’s faced off against Ra’s al Ghul, a functionally immortal man with a fucking army of highly trained assassin at his disposal).

Lia is tame honest to god tame compared to her mother (if her mother is like, 5’3”, that’s even more hilarious tbh). Essentially, if Lia’s older and somehow become Executive Assistant to Tim (or Bruce, because, fuck canon) it would be so god damn funny (read “The Executive Assistant To Batman” in which Tim nene became Robin but still knows the identities of the various Gotham vigilantes. Oh, and, he’s the Executive Assistant to Batman. It’s so fucking hilarious and y’all gotta check it out. It’s on AO3).

Number 2, is a lot more light hearted compared to the moral deliemma of Number 1 (as, is Lia is the same age as Robin!Jason, and knows that he’s gonna die, but she also doesn’t want to get involved with the vigilantes presents a very large problem). Number 1 is great for angst and a character study for this OC. Number 2, is a more light hearted, fun scenario (as it avoids the can of worms called “Do I Warn the Bats of Robin!Jasons impending death or not because I honestly don’t want to get involved with the Bat.”.

I, personally, would love to read Number 2 (please make Lia, or whatever OC, a god damn Tired of Your Bullshit, amazing assistant to the CEO of WE, competent af and very, Very Tired of the Bats BS, and, PR is Going To Skin Me Alive and Roast Me Over A Flame). Maybe some drama, angst sprinkled in (there’s the blatant fact that, Lia is a completely different world. One that has superhero’s, aliens, magic and so, so much more. The fact that she’s in her doppelgänger’s body could cause some dissociation/body dysphoria and that sort of stuff. It’s a great opportunity for a character study for Lia/your OC).

Regardless of you choose 1 or 2, the basic premise is:

Some rando kid (or young adult, whichever strikes your fancy) who loves to read Batman/DC in general. Ends up in some weird ass accident that lands them in the DC universe, specifically Gotham. Everything about their pervious life and the life in his world is the same (or not, up to you), only difference is that there’s an alien powered by the Sun and that cannot he injured (unless it’s by a glowing green rock). They decide, pretty early on, that they want nothing to do with the vigilantes of Gotham (which also means they have to avoid the Wayne’s and Co, which should be ways right? Right?? Gotham is really big, I’ll probably only ever see them in passing, I’ll be fine—). But, the universe said, LOL, nope. And they end up befriending the Wayne’s somehow. The rest? Up to you. If they befriend Robin!Jason they have to cope with the moral deliemma of getting involved to save his life or not. Or, maybe this is the world where Dick is still Robin. Do we save Jason early on, or not? What about Tim? Cass? Stephanie? Or, what if, they end up in a world in which Jason died and came back, Bruce came back from being lost in the time stream and Damian is now Robin.

Essentially: OC ends up in the DC universe, specifically Gotham. Decided not to ever get in involved with the Vigilantes/Wayne’s. However, the universe said nope and they become friends with one of the Bats/Waynes regardless. Now, how the fuck do they cope?

BONUS: Lia manages to avoid the Wayne’s/Vigilantes of Gotham completely. How? She ends working for LexCorp. As Lex Luthors Executive Assistant (basically the same way as she became the Executive Assistant to Tim). Now, she has to cope with the fact that she works as the Executive Assistant for Lex fucking Luthor of all people. She can hear her mother shaking her head in Disappointment™️. She hates the universe. Also, Lex Luthor is pretty open about his Evil, Bastard Schemes with Lia for whatever reason (much to Lia’s utter fucking chargin). She discreetly sends info about these Evil, Bastard, Devious plans to the Bats. Cue her realizing that, to ensure Luthor doesn’t suspect her, she’s gotta get GOOD at hacking and computer science. And get good she does. Like, her utter fucking Done-ness over Luthors Supervillain ways and her wanted to never be found out by the Bats is like taken to Infinty in the 10 dial scale. Somehow, she manages to both avoid suspicion from Luthor (cue intense moments in which Luthor is talking to her, and he’s speaking in a weird direct way that makes Lia think he found out and she mentally plans for her subsequent “death” and fleeing of the country and when Luthor finishes his sentences it just him praising her or something else innocuous. Lia felt like the sun was lifted off her shoulders.) She’s always on edge. Her hair is slowly turning grey. Luthor notices and makes a comment and Lia simply laughs while making a underhand comment about how Luthors bald so he doesn’t need to deal with greying hairs. Lia stops laughing realizing oh shit I just insulted my boss in the most underhand way. What ghe fuck. But Luthor just laughs, much to Lia’s relief. Her hair is still greying from the stress. Anyways, she inadvertently becomes a techno vigilante that can rival the famed Oracle (let’s say, for the sake of this prompt, Lia’s code name is Reaper because she was drunk and apparently in the mind of her 13 year old self when she came up with it). Reaper’s name is slowly growing, as Lia does some other stuff with her new found skills in hacking. She mostly helps the Bats by giving them crucial info on Luthors dealings and the like.

One day, she realizes, that, oh shit. I became the one thing swore I’d never become. What type of Shakespearean shit is my life—

If someone does the situation in which Lia/their OC becomes Luthor Executive Assistant and then inadvertently becomes a Vigilante themselves because, sure, they don’t want to get involved, but, fuck Luthor and Eat the Rich. Also, I would love it if said fic included the most stress inducing scenes were it seems like Luthor found out about Lia and the whole Reaper situation but he actually DIDN’T and Lia is here like, sweating god damn bucks while her hair slowly falls out. Please. Write this shit. It would be

✨Immaculate✨

Anyways, hope you like this prompt/one shot because I damn well enjoyed writing it!