#it brings her closer to him. wilson does that too but he is also the biggest liar ever lmao
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lilacerull0 · 4 months ago
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wasn't being entirely serious, but to be perfectly honest... it is only now occurring to me how wilson's house analysis is not necessarily a correct reading of his character ALL OF THE TIME. i think cameron is much better at understanding him which is why he pushes her away more than he does wilson
cameron makes a better wilson than wilson
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crazyk-imagine · 1 year ago
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Wade Wants to Reminisce
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Pairing: James “Bucky” Buchanon Barnes x Plus size!Super!reader, Wade “Deadpool” Wilson x Super!reader (platonic) Characters: Plus size!Super!reader, Wade “Deadpool” Wilson, James “Bucky” Buchanon Barnes, Natasha Romanoff, Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson, Tony Stark Warnings: Wade things, the avengers coming to save the reader, Bucky and the reader share a past, Nat and Wade are trying to get their friends laid, this is totally not inspired by a bunch of Bucky and Soldier Boy fics I read all weekend (don’t judge me), the deadpool gif is literally the reader and wade, this 100% does not make sense, I was bored and wanted some deadpool content, I also may have gone down a Bucky rabbit hole and here we are Word Count: 971
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He wouldn't tell you anything about his plans [I didn't want my plans to get ruined]
He'd make sure nothing bad would happen to you (nothing too major at least) [I wouldn't let them murder you or charge you with a B and E, chill]
Reenactment flashback 
You were fine until he set off an alarm [I didn't do that. It was Fabio. *Wade points to the intern* 
The poor guy starts shaking- 
The real reenactment
"Wade," you pinch the bridge of your nose. "Did we break into a building we shouldn't have?" 
"Yo soy no hablo Español." 
"You're hablo-ing Español right now!" 
"Fine! You caught me. I'm trying to help you suppress your kitty urges." 
"Wade!" 
"What?" He shrugs, eating a chimichango. "You kept whining to me how lonely you are and I know there's a lot of- ow, hot." He licks his fingers before trying to hold his chimichanga. "What was I saying? Oh right, there's a lot of fine men here for you to pounce on." 
"I'm going to kill you."
"You know you can't. I'm just doing my friendly duty."
"You're a problem for society." 
"That hurts." He places his hand over his heart. 
"I hope it fucking does you crackwhore." 
"Woah," he raises his hands. "There's no need to bring Blind AL into this." 
"We both know it's you I'm talking about."
"Uh- hey," Tony waves his hands. "I don't mean to interrupt whatever the hell this is but you two just broke into the Avenger headquarters so we're gonna need to detain you for a couple of hours." 
"Detain him." You point to Wade before raising your hands up in defense. "I had nothing to do with this." 
"You bitch," he replies, extending the words. 
"Slut."
"Whore."
"Old avocado."
"Dick sucker."
"At least my partner is satisfied."
He gasps, placing a hand over his chest. "What'd she tell you?"
"Nothing I didn't already know." 
"Doll?" 
You spin around with furrowed brows and then your jaw drops. "James?" 
"Wait- you two know each other?!" Tony and Steve shout. 
"She's your coffee date?" Natasha asks him with her hands on her hips. 
"You've been getting laid and I didn't know?" 
You pinch the bridge of your nose again. "I'm going to kill you. I swear on all that is holy Wade. I'm going to grab that hammer and smash you with it." 
"That's not the kind of hammering I planned on doing today." 
You purse your lips and pounce. 
James stepped closer to you just in time. "Hey, hey. Calm down." 
"Not until he's mush." 
"Doll." 
"But-"
"No." 
"Bucky," you whine. "Just a little?"
"Not a chance." 
"Would you two mind explaining how you met?" Natasha asks. 
"Coffee shop." 
Sam walks into the room, taking a second to see what's going on and then he sees you. "Oh, hey." 
You turn and smile at him. "Sammy." 
"Why does he get such a nice greeting?" Wade whines. 
"He's not you." 
"I take major offense to that." 
"You should." 
"Rude." 
"I'm still stuck on the fact that Tinman went to a coffee shop and got a date. He doesn't even like coffee," Tony complains. 
"I like a certain type of coffee." 
"From a cute girl?" 
"No." 
"Yes. Man, you thought she was cute and bought her coffee," Sam rats James out. 
You spin around in his arms. "You did?" 
Usually he likes to think of himself as someone who doesn't get embarrassed but right now, he's plotting ways to get back at Sam. He doesn't look up at you. "Uh- I- I did."
"Well aren't you sweet," you smile up at him. 
"I need to call Vanessa." 
The smile is wiped from your face. "Go home, Wade!" 
"But then I wouldn't get some memories I can play on repeat with my unicorn or Vanessa later." 
"For fucks sake- Wade, get back here."
James lifts you over his shoulder and walks towards his room, locking the door behind him. "This makes things a lot easier." He sets you down. 
"Yeah?" 
"Yeah, I planned on calling you and asking if you wanted to go out." 
"If I say yes," you trace shapes on his chest, before staring at him through your lashes. "Can we stay here for the rest of the day?" 
"If I say yes, will you stop using those eyes on me? You're killing me, doll. You know I'd say yes without that look." 
You smile up at him and practically bounce as you walk away and aim for his bed. 
A voice can be heard through the airvents. "So, does this mean you'd rather get ducked down than hangout with me?" 
"100%"
"Cool. Just checking. Text me the details. I want to know how big." 
"Wade!"
"I'm curious to see if he's a queen or a king." 
"Liar."
"You've caught me but I already know."
"Go home."
"Bye kids. Use protection, unless you're into that." [And you all know what I'm talking about. Don't act like your Tumblr isn't full of those fics. Yes, I know about them too. Who do you think will write some about me?] 
Wade closes the laptop he stole (from you) and sighs. “This was nice.” 
You throw your boyfriend's alarm clock at him. 
“Ow!” 
“Go home, Wade. We’re trying to sleep.”
“Doll, what’s tumblr?” 
“Wade you’re dead!” 
Wade’s screaming alerts the rest of the compound. 
“Why is your friend screaming?” Steve asks you. 
“He taught James something he shouldn’t have, and he knows it. GET BACK HERE, WILSON!” 
“Never!” 
“I hope you’re proud,” Natasha pats James’ back. 
“Why are you saying it like that?” 
“Your girlfriend brought home a parasite.” 
“It could be worse.” 
“It could be worse!?” Sam screeches.
“It could be so much worse, Sammy.” 
“That’s my nickname for him. You don’t get to steal it.” 
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lazyrants · 5 months ago
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Little Sportacus (prod 206)
Original airdate: September 26, 2006
Story by Magnus Scheving
Written by Magnus Scheving, Mani Svavarrson, Noah Zachary
Directed by Magnus Scheving
Executive producers - Magnus Scheving, Ragnheidur Melsted, Raymond P. Le Gue, Brown Johnson, Kay Wilson Stallings
Starring Magnus Scheving, Stefan Karl Steffanson, Julianna Rose Mauriello, David Kristjan Olafsson
Puppeteers - Gudmondor Thor Karason, Jodi Eichelberger, David Matthew Feldman, Julie Westwood, Sarah Burgess, Ronald Binion, Emily Decola
Little Sportacus - another Sportacus themed episode! Sweeett!
The episode begins with Sportacus getting a letter from ten year old Tommy - 'What stuff did you do when you were ten?' He says his favourite game was dodgeball! (When I was ten, I loved dodgeball too!!)
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Then at the end of the game (he cartwheels and flips and rolls to dodge the ball, awesome!) he catches the ball in his hand. Meanwhile, Robbie is in his lair, shaking with a bowl of popcorn in his hand, yelling 'It wasn't me!!' Possibly, having a nightmare about getting framed? Then he wakes up, and says that was a great nap. He grabs some chocolate.
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But he is distracted by the sound of a rubber ball.. bouncing. Stephanie is walking with a basketball and she stops to tell her uncle what a wonderful day it is. Milford says it's a great day to do some yard work.
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This is the exact type of scene to have 'Upphaf' from Latabæ as background music, and it does.. until Ziggy rides his bicycle without his training wheels. Stephanie tells him to use his brakes, and whaddya know? He hasn't learned how to do that yet. So, he's in trouble. And we all know who to call when Ziggy is in trouble. Sportacus - whose crystal beeps. Ziggy is headed straight for the ice-cream stand, and he doesn't worry. He does the exact opposite until he gets a bit closer. Sportacus throws an anchor's hook up to the airship.
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Then he attaches the other side of the anchor to a hook of the ice-cream stand. Then with no effort (come on, he's Magnus Scheving) he LIFTS UP THE ICE-CREAM STAND. But that's not it - Ziggy's still riding, so Sportacus goes down the rope. Ziggy is about to crash into Milford's bush when Sportacus stops the bike.. with his yoyo.
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Then Sporty aerobics over to him and checks if he's all good. Robbie decides to use his periscope, but a running Stephanie startles him and he hides. Milford asks why Ziggy was going so fast. He was trying to ride his bicycle, but he says he is just too little. Sportacus says that you learn more when you're little. After he leaves, Robbie wishes Sportacus could be a teeny tiny child so he didn't know anything. But that's impossible. Or is it? So, he goes to build his newest invention, and it can change your age.
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He tests it on a bird and brings him back to an EGG. That's like bringing Sportacus back to an fetus - that won't work. So he adjusts it a bit and now it works perfectly. Meanwhile, Sportacus is doing some skipping from here and there. Robbie's disguise is.. a bush. Behind him. Wow. Sportacus hears the leaves rustling and stops for a few seconds, then continues. Anyways, once Sporty is distracted, Robbie tries to zap Sportacus.. but he keeps moving side to side. Then he finally stays in one place, and bam! He is ten years old again.
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Fun fact - Little Sportacus is voiced by a girl. Anyways, he runs over to Ziggy and asks for his help. But he doesn't believe him until Ziggy says he has a super-secret nickname only Sportacus knows. Then Sportacus whispers it to him - 'Mr. Fluffy Bunny Pants'. I don't know why that was kept a secret - if I got a rabbit I'd name it that! Also shocked Ziggy is even funnier then confused Sportacus.
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Ziggy thinks the rest of the kids would freak out if they saw Sportacus like this, so Ziggy goes to Pixel's house and asks for some drip to borrow. It is delivered in an orange package. So, anyways, Sportacus puts it on, and Ziggy tells him to just act like himself. Then he does a 360 spin and that super cool hero pose with his arms. Ziggy then corrects himself - act like a kid. Then he occupies him with a ball so he is bound to do the exact opposite of what Ziggy JUST said.
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I love this season, but it seems that Ziggy doesn't think enough sometimes. He learns the lessons, moves on and does something ridiculous. Well, this is only one dumb Ziggy moment I can name. He's cool the rest of the season. Anyways, he goes to start figuring out what happened to Sportacus. Meanwhile, Stephanie spots Sportacus just standing on the court. She asks who he is and he does the 360 epic superhero spin xd1!!!!111oneone. He says Spob as he already started to say his real name (but forgor he wasn't supposed to). The two shake hands, and Stephanie wants to play a game. Spob says he is out of practice.
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Stephanie passes the ball to him which nearly makes him fall (come on, Sportacus!!) then he passes it back. Stephanie starts dribbling the ball, and then they perform Time to Play. As the song ends, Stephanie is suspicious of how good Spob plays. She rips out a page of her diary and it flies away. Sportacus is on the move - he does the signature move, cartwheels and jumps to catch it in mid-air.
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As Stephanie figures out it's Sportacus, Ziggy comes riding on the court. He accidentally says 'Hi, Sportacus!' and he corrects himself by saying gibberish (genuinely funny!!). Anyways, after they clear up that Steph knows Spob is Sportacus, she asks how it happened. Sportacus said if only someone was around when it happened. Ziggy says there is a way to find out so they go to Pixel's house. Stephanie tells them it's Sportacus but they don't believe her. He power jumps to prove it is him.
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So then Ziggy asks Pixel to check the cameras earlier today. They see the bush behind them move before Sportacus is zapped. They say they have to find out where that bush is from. Using Pixel's drone camera. The drone is controlled with a remote control, and the kids see a leave trail. So, they follow it and it leads to Robbie's lair. Stephanie follows it and she mistakes it for a dead end, until she leans on the door and falls down.
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She gets up, climbs the ladder and opens up the chute to Robbie's lair. Meanwhile, Robbie himself is deciding to celebrate the success of his plan with a nap. But the kids have showed up. Pixel's drone is hovered down into the lair. Another trail of leaves leads to.. Robbie. Napping. Ziggy wants to control the drone so he snatches it from Pixel and gets it stuck in between two of Robbie's microwaves. Sportacus calls for a rope from his airship and decides to go down. He ties it to his waist and Stephanie holds it. He dives down!
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Sportacus unties himself. Meanwhile, the drone starts shaking along with the table. On the table is that little baby egg. It almost rolls off but Sportacus dives to catch it. Even when he is facing a serious problem he still saves someone, no matter how small their trouble is. The dive wakes up Robbie, and he starts chasing him around the table. Then Sportacus kicks the drone.
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The kick is reminiscent of Bruce Lee's flying kick in 'The Big Boss'. No surprise as Sportacus re-enacts Lee's nunchuck routine from Enter the Dragon in 'Double Trouble' and 'Great Greens'. Maggi admits he watched Lee as a child. Anyways, the drone starts flying towards Robbie's face and he falls to the ground. He continues to chase him after he gets up. Using his wits (and the throwing of a baby egg to distract him), Sportacus flips onto the platform. Robbie asks how he did that, and he said he practiced. The kids cheer. Robbie runs up the staircase and Sportacus walks on the rails. Robbie dives to catch him, Sportacus flips, and Robbie falls. Epic and also kinda funny.
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Sportacus sees his clothes in one of the pods (iiittt's the LazyPod Podcast!! XD. Go listen to it though, Mark Valenti hosts it and it's epic) and he figures there must be a way to get it. Oh yeah, Robbie stole them while they were performing 'Time to Play'. He pulls the lever and is back in costume. Sportacus flips off to the machine but Robbie blocks him. Then after he cartwheels back Robbie says it'll destruct in ten seconds. Sportacus says that's all he needs. Then he throws the egg, slides under Robbie's legs, and presses the button. Fricking liar. He needed TWELVE seconds! But time is Lazy in LazyTown, so technically he needed eight seconds. Missing the point - he is back to normal again. Sportacus notices it's going to blow. Robbie comes flying out the lair!
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And he lands on Milford's bush. Everyone notices it's Robbie Rotten. Anyways, probably because of the power of one apple bite, Sportacus is a-okay. He gives Pixel the drone. Ziggy tells Sportacus he learnt an important lesson today - you're never too little to learn and if a bush comes at you with a fishing rod and an umbrella, run. (I checked behind myself to see if there was a bush with a fishing rod and umbrella. No joke. Why am I like this?) They all laugh and sing Bing Bang. Robbie is still chillin when the egg hatches.
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The bird says 'Mama!' and Robbie says 'ME???' then he pats the bird (in the extended version of the episode). Then a cartoony circle closes in on the bird and fades into the credits.
10/10 - I liked that episode a lot!! Season two has started amazingly. Two episodes in a row with a full rating.
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invisibleraven · 2 years ago
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15 for Reggie ship of your choice?
Reggie is more surprised than anyone to be invited to Carrie Wilson's holiday party. But there's an invitation with his name on it in Carrie's distinctive pink scrawl waiting in his locker, so he figures it's not a prank.
Thankfully the band is also invited, and when he asks Julie about it, she shrugs saying that she and Carrie were on friendly enough terms now, so she wasn't going to snub the invite. They gather together and put on some nicer clothes, all festive colours and fun holiday themed socks. Reggie loves the adorable Santa Grogu socks that Flynn found him, and is delighted to find out that they came in a three pack, with Flynn winking that he might just get the other two pairs come Christmas.
They arrive at the Wilson's Malibu mansion, absolutely bedecked with lights just as the party is supposed to start. An actual butler opens the door, even if his bowtie is red and green plaid instead of the usual black. They follow the sound of the music, and find the party in full swing.
The Dirty Candi girls are milling around with the lacrosse team, some of the cheerleaders leading a holiday themed karaoke in the corner. There's tables of food and drinks, and the whole house looks like Christmas exploded on it. Reggie honestly feels kind of lame in his nicer red flannel with his tin of cookies clutched in his hands.
Carrie flounced over to them, greeting them all, then stops when Reggie thrusts the tin at her, avoiding her gaze as he blushes. "My MeeMaw said you should always bring the hostess a gift for parties. It's just some shortbreads and sugar cookies."
"My favourites!" Carrie exclaimed, and Reggie heard the faint tinkle of bells, finally turning to look at her and he had to stop. Because Carrie Wilson, one of the most fashionable people he knows (never telling Flynn he thinks that, by the way) is wearing an ugly Christmas sweater.
It is a bright vibrant green, and covered in pom-poms and bells in the shape of a tree. Her skirt is a cheery red colour and lined with golden tinsel and falls just above her knees, leading down to her candy cane striped socks and honest to goodness pointed toe elf shoes.
Carrie notices him eyeing her outfit and gives a little twirl, her bells ringing as she does. "Don't you just love my outfit?"
"It's very uh, festive," Reggie replies.
"I'm bummed I didn't wear my sweater just like that one," Luke snickers, earning him an elbow to the side from Julie. The group exchange pleasantries for a bit before going to get some snacks (Julie, Luke, and Flynn), or to the dance floor (Alex and Willie), leaving Reggie alone with Carrie.
"Were... were we supposed to wear ugly sweaters?" Reggie asks.
"Nah, I just wanted to," Carrie replied. "It's the one time of the year I can get away with wearing something so deranged and not get judged about it. Plus it's kind of fun making music wherever I go."
"You do that anyways," Reggie said. "You're always humming under your breath in class, coming up with your next hit song. Or singing along quietly as you go through the halls."
Carrie looks at him then, a faint flush appearing on her cheeks. "I didn't think anyone noticed."
"I tend to notice a lot about you," Reggie admitted. "You try to appear really aloof, but I dunno, I think you have a soft side. The outfit kind of proves it."
"What else does it prove?" Carrie asked, a smile gracing her features.
"Well, you definitely have a whimsical side, and I don't know if you made it, or you designed it, but I bet you did, you're so creative. It's you. A little musical, a little goofy, and very over the top. But... you do look good in it."
Carrie took a step closer, running a gentle finger from his collar bone to the pocket of his flannel. "You look good too."
"I look like I always do though?" Reggie said, confused. Carrie smiled even wider and Reggie bit his lip as he blushed, realizing what she meant. "You wanna go eat the cookies I brought and then maybe dance?"
"Sounds good," Carrie replied. "I know the best spot too, come on." She dragged them towards the kitchen, out of view. And if she caught Reggie under the mistletoe there, well he didn't mind one bit about the pit stop. Nor did he mind that they spent more time there than on the dance floor.
All he cared about was the taste of Carrie mixed with the flavour of his cookies, and the way her laughter echoed the bells on her sweater whenever they embraced.
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newagesispage · 10 months ago
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                                                                 FEBRUARY     2024 
THE RIB PAGE 
***** 
Among the inductees for the 2023 Library of Congress selections include: Fame, Desperately Seeking Susan, Lady and the Tramp, Home Alone, Terminator 2, 20 feet from Stardom, The Wedding Banquet, Apollo 13, 12 Years a Slave and Love and Basketball. 
***** 
The Supreme Court will hear the Colorado case of Trump on the ballot on Feb. 8. They will also be looking into the responsibility of hospitals in no abortion states. ** And what were those red marks on Trumps hand? Dry skin? Syphillis?** Roger Stone has called for killing the opposition. 
***** 
Mark Knopfler is selling most of his guitars at a London auction house with some of the proceeds going to charity. 
***** 
Joey Fatone and AJ Mclean are going on tour. 
***** 
Willem Dafoe, Charlie Wilson and George Clinton got their stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Garrett Morris will be getting his on Feb. 1. 
***** 
Our Flag means death was cancelled. 
***** 
John Kerry is stepping down as the U.S. Climate envoy. 
***** 
The FDA ruled the Florida government can procure prescription drugs from Canada. This could save taxpayers as much as $183 mil a year. Big Pharma is none too happy. This was rejected in New Hampshire. Many other states are in the application process.  
***** 
A resolution to prevent a partial shutdown of the government was passed for funding until March. The zealots are furious. ** According to a new book, Find me the votes, Lindsey Graham testified that if you told Trump, “that martians came and stole the election, he would probably believe it.” He also gave the Fulton County D.A., Fani Willis a big hug and thanked her for letting him get it out. 
***** 
Hiking with Kevin is back!!!!! Hooray!!!!! 
***** 
The innocence project is looking into the Scott Peterson case claiming new evidence. 
***** 
Paul Thomas Anderson will bring Sean Penn, Regina Hall and Leo DiCaprio together for his next film. 
***** 
Rachel Dratch has a podcast, WooWoo, with ghost stories. 
***** 
There is prejudice everywhere, it does no good to give it back. - Ship of Fools 
***** 
Marilyn Monroe’s home at 12305 W. Helena Dr. Has been declared a historical landmark by the LA cultural Heritage Commision. The actress purchased the home shortly before she died there. 
***** 
Fox News has cancelled My Pillow due to past due bills. 
***** 
Why does Bonnie Hunt not have a talk show anymore?? C’mon!! I miss it!! 
***** 
Jason Momoa and Lisa Bonet are divorced. 
***** 
Taiwan elected William Lai Ching-te for a third term of the Democratic progressive Party. 
***** 
Food Network Star Darnell Ferguson was arrested on strangulation, terrorist threatening, assault, menacing criminal mischief and burglary charges in Kentucky. 
***** 
A U.S. labor agency has accused SpaceX of illegally firing 8 employees.** Sports Illustrated seems to be in a real mess like most of print media. Does corporate everywhere want to fire the writers and use AI?? 
***** 
A 7.5 magnitude earthquake hit Japan. 
***** 
Days alert: Steve Burton is out at Days and back at GH. ** Bring back Jen Lilley. They seem to be pushing Brady and Teresa to be closer again and these actors have no chemistry. ** The cast of Days have been putting out many messages at the loss of Bill Hayes. I miss him already!!** Glad that they R bringing back an old story like the pawn. The characters act like nobody knows but I thought the town knew that John was the pawn? ** But hooray for Johnny and Chanel, let one couple be happy!!  
***** 
Rage against the Machine has broken up again, according to drummer Brad Wilk. 
***** 
Iran attacked Pakistan and brought death. Pakistan retaliated and brought some more death. Is there a place in the world that is not filled with hate right now? 
***** 
The Girl Scout cookies are here!!** Why is Kris Jenner selling Oreos? 
***** 
Fruit Stripe gum is no more. RIP 
***** 
How refreshing to see the economy doing so well. ** Some are upset that Biden launched strikes against Yeman without congressional approval. The Houthi’s have interrupted the supply chain route. ** And why do Trump and friends bitch about Biden at all? According to them, a President has total immunity so what is the problem?? Can’t he do anything he wants?  Why did we never have this problem before? Trump claims a President needs immunity but I don’t think it was a problem until now. ** Chris Christie is out .. Asa Hutchinson is out... Vivek Ramaswami is out... DeSantis is out (much has been made of the leader of Ron’s Superpak with nothing to do but put a puzzle together). DeSantis used a Churchill quote to end his campaign that Churchill never said. ** Scary Clown 45 told the Iowa caucus goers, “You can’t sit home. If you’re sick as a dog, even if you vote and then pass away, it’s worth it. “ People stood in line up to 4 hours in sub zero temps to see him. In attendance were Coach Dan Gable and WWE’s Kane. He later cancelled 3 rallies. ** The comics made much of the pics from the caucus like the Iowa caucus looked like the opposite of Martin Luther King Day. We also must remember that Ted Cruz once won the Iowa Caucus. **32% of Iowa Republicans say that Trump is not fit for office. 14% of Republicans actually voted and 51% picked Trump. DeSantis was a distant second and Haley third. ** Tacopina and his partners in the law firm have parted ways with Trump. 
***** 
Trump took New Hampshire but Haley was not that far off. The whole thing about the DNC fucking up the order of the states and Biden not getting on the ballot was just stupid. It made the Dems look unorganized and petty. No more of that! ** Should we be worried about a second Trump term yet or are we all William Holden in a disaster movie?  Why are we so, “nothing to see hear, everything is fine?”** A recent story broke about the pharmacy in the White House. Apparently, when Trump was in office, the rules for said pharmacy were pretty loose. The word is they didn’t believe in generic drugs and they were handed out like candy. ** Trump was ordered to pay E. Jean Carroll $83 mil.** A judge dismissed the Disney case against Ron DeSantis. 
***** 
Shucked will be a film. 
***** 
Say Something is the tip line provided by Sandy Hook Promise. A recent study in the Journal of Pediatrics looked to study one of the 23 states that provides the service. Of the 18,000 tips submitted from 2019- 2023, 10% referred to a firearm. The tips prevented 38 instances of school violence, and more than 100 planned suicides. There were a thousand mental health interventions. More than 42,000 people have died from gun related injuries in 2023. Firearms are the leading cause of death for children and teens. 
***** 
Jason Reitman is bringing us SNL1975 with Gabriel LaBelle playing Lorne Michaels. The film will also star Cooper Hoffman and Rachel Sennott. 
***** 
Alec Baldwin was indicted again for involuntary manslaughter. 
***** 
Fire ants have gone a bit nuts in Australia. 
***** 
A woman can’t be Vice President.  - Meghan McCain 
***** 
An ancient city was discovered in the Amazon in the 70’s. After 25 years of research there are some findings. Scientists feel this is the oldest settled site in the Amazon. It was built about 2,500 years ago with thousands of platforms and a system of roads and canals. The civilization may have been bigger than the ancient societies in Mexico and Central America. 
***** 
Riley Keough is finishing up Lisa Marie’s memoir and we should see it by October 15. 
***** 
Ban dictionaries? OMG!!! Florida laws have led some schools to take out the dictionaries. 
***** 
Super/Man is a new documentary about Christopher Reeve. 
***** 
Look for a new comic book about The Creature from the Black Lagoon. 
***** 
It’s awards season!!!!!!! 
The Golden Globes sure got some smack. Jo Koy was raked over the coals for his idea of hosting. He kept angrily making excuses and telling the crowd he didn’t write some of the jokes. What?? It is a tough gig and I can sympathize BUT I don’t think he said any terrible things but it was the way he said it. Everybody was talking about Taylor Swift but I didn’t see that she seemed angry, she often looks like that. I was taken aback by the Barbie thing. He was right, as Greta Gerwig pointed out that it was true that they made a movie about a doll with big boobs. I think it was the way he said it. He was so dismissive on a night that was sort of celebratory for women. To have a box office smash all around a woman theme was a breakthrough. He treated it like it could not compare to the ‘important’ movies. He made fun of their work instead of some of the actual celebrity eccentricities like a Gervais might do. I don’t know that it was the big deal the press made of it, just don’t ask him back. My best dressed were Issa Rae, Nicolas Cage, Rosamund Pike, Rachel Brosnahan, Brie Larson, Selena Gomez, Julia Garner, Andra Day, Taylor Swift, Sheryl Lee Ralph, Jim Gaffigan, Matt Rhys, Natasha Lyonne, Natalie Portman, Margot Robbie, Lenny Kravitz, Deacon Phillippe, Kristen Wiig, Meryl Streep, Jodie Foster and Emma Stone. The theme of the night seemed to be slicked back hair. Winners included Ricky Gervais, Davine Joy Randolph, Robert Downey Jr., Ali Wong, Lily Gladstone, Sarah Snook, Matt McFadden, Paul Giamatti and KIERAN CULKIN!! The whole audience stood when they called Culkin’s name which seemed to embarrass him but he so deserved it. There is always one older celeb who acts a bit strange, this year it was Kevin Costner who mumbled his banter and seemed to hate America Ferrera. They were an odd couple. A great couple was Martin Short and Meryl Streep who insist they are just good friends. They were so cute and I want them together in the worst way!! I was thrilled that the powers that be made this award show easy to watch. Award shows are very strict about keeping things on the network that broadcast the event. This show was on multiple sites. I always wonder about that because they don’t have enough ratings to be so selfish. 
***** 
The Critics Choice awards were hosted by Chelsea Handler who did a good job. To me, the best dressed were Jen Aniston, Carey Mulligan, Jodie Foster, Margot Robbie, Colman Domingo, Harvey Guillen, Chelsea Handler, Christina Ricci, Tracee Ellis Ross, Kieran Culkin, Alison Williams, Lenny Kravitz, Ali Wong, Mandy Moore, Rosamund Pike, Quinta Brunson, Bella Ramsey, Kaley Cuoco and Karen Pittman. I was so glad to see Ramon Rodriguez nominated!!!** Kieran Culkin won again!! Other winners include Da’Vine Joy Randolph, Ali Wong, Barbie, Oppenheimer, Succession and American Fiction. When Meryl Streep is nominated for tv, it reminds me of the Nascar Cup drivers that compete in the other races. She didn’t win anyway but it just doesn’t seem quite right. 
***** 
The 75th Emmys was hosted by Anthony Anderson and he did a good job too. His Mother was even better. TV theme songs were front and center. I think Mr. Anderson just really wanted to sing them!  My best dressed were Sheryl Lee Ralph, Rhea Seehorn (who I was really routing for but no win), Ken and Tran Jeong, Alan Ruck, Dominique Fishback, Taylor Tomlinson, Brian Cox, Ali Wong (she nailed it at every show), Niecy Nash, Joy Sunday, Sarah Snook, Briga Heelan, Katherine Hiegel, Jenna Ortega, Donald Glover, Giancarlo Esposito, Jessica Chastain, Mario Bello, Keiran and Jazz, Claire Danes and Riley Keough. Princess Poppy stood out for the Green Goblin look. I was most excited to see Holland Taylor, Marla Gibbs, the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel cast and Carol Burnett. Winners include Kieran again, Quinta Brunson, Niecy Nash-Betts, Sarah Snook, The Daily Show with Trever Noah and Succession. I laughed the most when the It’s Always Sunny cast came on. Give those funny humans some love academy!!!!** Seriously, I liked the winners in any Saul category that won but Better Call Saul was so overdue with 0 for 53. They did set a record though for the most nominated show that never won.** Kieran Culkin may be doing a comedy next. ** Listen to a drag queen.- RuPaul 
***** 
The BAFTA noms were announced and include Barbie, The Color Purple, Poor Things, All of us strangers, Napolean, The Holdovers, Killers of the Flower Moon, Maestro, Oppenheimer and American Fiction. 
***** 
The Oscar noms were also announced with love for Cillian Murphy, Jeffrey Wright, Colman Domingo, Paul Gimatti ,Lily Gladstone, Emma Stone, Robbie Robertson, Jodie Foster, Sterling K. Brown, Robert DeNiro, Robert Downey Jr and Ryan Gosling. Scorsese now has had more nominations (10) than any other living director. People made much about Greta Gerwig and Margot Robbie not getting noms for directing and acting respectively. I get that but for once I agree with Whoopi Goldberg who said, “Not everybody gets a prize!” I mean there are only so many slots.* * The Oscars will broadcast on March 10. 
***** 
Great Kurt Russel stories have come to light, thanks to his children. Kurt beat up Tex Watson, he was there after the Bronco chase and had a plate of food stolen by Ted Bundy! This guy is full of surprises! 
***** 
Turkey has approved Sweden’s NATO membership. 
***** 
Sexual assault news: Vince McMahon and his former head of talent at WWE, John Laurinaitis have been sued for sexual abuse and sex trafficking. ** Caroline Manzo sued Bravo over sexual harassment and assault by Brandi Glanville. 
***** 
Sean Kehoe and Kirra Potts have sued Pauly Shore for assault and battery from a 2022 incident. 
***** 
Javier Bardem and Chloe Sevigny will star in the Lyle and Eric Menendez story. 
***** 
A U.S. Judge has blocked Jetblue from acquiring Spirit Airlines. 
***** 
Marlon Wayans will star in GOAT from Jordan Peele. 
***** 
Why does Bill Maher have such a crush on Elon Musk? He was teasing celebs in a little bit on his show but after Elon, he giggled that he was kidding like he can’t offend the dude.  And, he is still bitching about that Barbie movie. ** And, did a poll really say Maher was the most trusted man in America? 
***** 
People sure seem to be upset about the way the NFL is broadcasting this season. Games that they really want to see are on channels that a lot of people do not have. $$$ just to watch football. ** I will never understand why teams are allowed to run out the clock. They should be actually playing football and still trying to win. It is wrong!!  
***** 
It sounds like we have a new cult to worry about. The University of Cosmic Intelligence of Missouri seems to be run by a convicted child molester from prison. Rashad Jamal has about 200,000 subscribers on YouTube. Six people have turned up missing. 
***** 
Can’t wait for the film, A Real Pain with Keiran Culkin, Jennifer Grey and Jesse Eisenberg. 
***** 
The Superbowl is here with Kansas City and San Fransisco. They are already bombarding us with commercials for their commercials. How did this country come to love this day so much?? 
***** 
Looks like it is time for a movie of the week about Elle King. Word is that she has had several drunken performances lately. It was the recent Dolly Parton tribute at the Opry that went awry. Her performance was filled with cussing for the family audience and struggling to get thru the song. I always respected her music so I hope she works it out. I am sure that Dolly will be on the case. The age old question of how the public will react in the long run will have to play out. Will she stay a rebel and get thru? Will she have a reality show or do rehab? Will she want to do anything? 
***** 
So, they give a woman a late night show and Taylor Tomlinson seems funny enough but they saddle her with a sort of game show where points don’t count and it’s about stupid internet stuff I am always trying to get away from. Just give a woman a show like the big boys. And while you’re at it.. A show for Bonnie Hunt. 
*****  
Will and Harper looks like a great film that shows Will Ferrell and friends journey thru another friends transition. 
***** 
It looks like Alabama loves the death penalty so much they are killing people twice. Nitrogen? Look, if it doesn’t work the first time, perhaps there is a reason to keep them alive. Yikes!! ** The UN has condemned Alabama for the execution. 
***** 
Kate of Wales had abdominal surgery which will sideline her for months. King Charles will also have a minor procedure and be gone for a bit. 
***** 
Pierce Brosnan pled not guilty to trespassing at Yellowstone. 
*****  
In the past 25 years, tobacco use among teens has dropped by 93%. 
***** 
LaPierre is out at the NRA for ‘health reasons.’ Andrew Arulanadam will be interim CEO. Membership has dropped from about 6 mil to 4 mil in the last few years. The corruption trial has started. The NY AG has already reached a settlement with former executive Josh Powell. The Director of Operations has reached a $100,000 agreement with her office and admitted to wrong doing by failing in his fiduciary responsibilities and a misuse of charitable funds. ** There is so much corruption all over the country in little stories throughout the right wing. Florida and Arizona and elsewhere in local papers have stories of illegal financial dealings, sex scandals and broke coffers. There are too many to mention here. Look it up! 
***** 
Westgate Resorts in Kissimmee Fla. canceled a Marjorie Taylor Greene event. The room was supposedly rented for a book signing but the venue found out this was really to be a commemoration of Jan.6. 
***** 
Nobody is sure why the sec. Of defense, Lloyd Austin kept his cancer diagnosis and procedure so hush hush. The President should probably know these things.  
***** 
Hungary’s far right, Our Homeland Party, says it will try to claim a western region of Ukraine that is Transcarpathia, if they lose the war. 
***** 
Trump thinks we need a dome over the country like a Simpsons movie, I guess. ** Trump complains about being in court when he is not required to attend. ** James Carville thinks we should use mockery and ridicule ala Mel Brooks and Mark Twain to get rid of Trump. Carville also asked the question, ”When was the last time Trump saw his dick?” ** Nikki Haley was victim of a swatting incident at her home in South Carolina last month. 
***** 
Aaron Rodgers has proved again what a schmuck he is as he accuses Jimmy Kimmel of being a pedophile. This particular mudslinging seems to be the go- to for dick heads everywhere now. It was reported that he was banned from ESPN but that turned out not to be true. Aaron was back in no time.** Charles Barcley said he would have hit him in the face. **ESPN had to return more than 30 Emmy’s to the television academy after it was discovered the network submitted fake names to get around eligibility rules.* * But.. Why was Kimmel interviewing Depend models and telling them, they would be humiliated the rest of their lives?” This product is crucial for a certain population of this world. I see these elderly and handicapped people everyday. Should they be humiliated too? And why should those models be humiliated? Seems like a real, honest job to me. 
***** 
Robert Kennedy Jr. Threw a party and nobody wanted to come. Martin Sheen, Dionne Warwick, Mike Tyson and Andre Bocelli were among the scheduled guests but none of them had agreed to come or even support his candidacy. The party was said to be a 70th Birthday/ fundraiser and even RFK did not show up. A pac calling themselves Fighting for one America has been blamed. 
***** 
New technology may have told us the identity of DB Cooper. The latest guess seems to be a Crucible steel worker employee named Vince Peterson. 
***** 
Peecycling (urine recycling) is becoming a thing. 
***** 
How to dance in Ohio is coming to Broadway. 
***** 
A nude man was nabbed from a Bass Pro in Alabama after he took a dive into the giant aquarium. 
***** 
Jon Stewart will be back hosting The Daily Show on Mondays. He is also Exec. Producer! 
***** 
The Walton kid actors have mentioned an Earl Hamner stamp. I think we need to look into that! 
***** 
Habitat for Humanity is looking to tear down an old nursing home in East Peoria, Il to build a little village of 5-8 homes for vets. 
***** 
R.I.P. Mickey Cottrell, Glynis Johns, war victims, Tom Johnson, Amanda Davies, Joyce Randolph, Chrissie Slusher- Philips, Norman Jewison, Mary Weiss, Marlena Shaw, Norm Snead, Bud Harrelson, Tanya Berezin, Phill Niblock, Alec Musser, school shooting victims, Bernice Johnson, Harry Johnson, Cindy Morgan, Tisa Farrow, Peter Crombie, April Ferry, John Bush, David Beckwith, Charles Osgood, Adam Harrison, Melanie, Gary Graham, Ruth Ashton Taylor, Harry Connick Sr., Chita Rivera, Dexter Scott King, Bill Hayes, Lynne Marta and David Soul. 
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the-valiant-valkyrie · 2 years ago
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ok i pull up w incomprehensible content
ok so uhm umm. maxy waxy has a very similar presence in a worship verse than he does in a regular verse. was your standard boring guy before he accidentally stumbled across a fucked up grimoire and came to learn about the existence of a god of insanity. as a disciple of said god he's learned numerous tricks, some of the more prevalent ones being the ability to contort his body (usually his arms) into coiling writhing masses to use as weapons in combat. another interesting thing abt the world of worship is that insanity has the ability to mutate your physical form so. based off of that information you could expect that hes a little bit deranged. but its ok hes coping with it
wendy and wigfrid are actually in the same cult, but discovered it in different ways. shortly after the death of abigail, wendy grew furious at the concept that any loving god wouldn't save her dying sister's life, and sought for answers on what religion even was or meant, or if it were all a façade. in doing so, she learned of the apostle of deliverance- a god who believes the death of all humans to be a mercy, and life to be suffering. wendy, already sort of believing that already, fell easily under the allure of this mentality, and abandoned her family and their perceived 'foolish' religion to gain a closer connection to her sister and bring about the end of all
wigfrid on the other hand, spent a lot of time wondering why most 'justice' in that time (read: 1700s or whatever) amounted to burning pagans or practitioners of magic at the stake, torturing them for acts that were arbitrarily seen as sinful. while seeking answers on what true justice is, she too stumbled across the apostle of deliverance, and heeded his message in a different way. if all of humanity- including herself- were sinful, of course they needed to be razed from this earth… she devoted herself to the cause at once, and rose swiftly through the ranks with her immense talent. she is known amongst her peers as 'the high sacrifice'- in reference to her eventual destiny in the name of her god- and she wears the title like a badge of honor, completely unfazed by the concept of her fate
willow has by far the least personal connection to religion. as a young girl she was homeless, wandering around the streets of her village. but when they were attacked by a crusade, a counter-ambush of fire wielding cultists had been the only thing saving her and all others from potential slaughter. she grew an endearment to their weapon of choice rather quickly, and- being devoid of a home anyway- chose to join them and learn their dark arts. the only ritual she's ever partaken in (scalding her hands beyond recognition (incredibly painful)) was exclusively to be able to wield fire in the same way they did. beyond that, she couldn't care much for their religion- even if their god is a fire one. she pretends she does, to keep a home and food, but thinks they're kind of insane aside from that
wilson also isn't very much of a cultist honestly… he was nothing more than the same ol scientist he usually is- practicing science and medicine. but the thing about the 1700s is that science and medicine is usually seen as witchcraft. forced to flee his home or else risk death for being labeled a sorcerer, he reluctantly turned to a group of cultists who worshiped a supposed 'mother of the coven', a figure who was said to have protected wayward practitioners of any sort, science, medicine, or true magic. it took him a while to come to terms with the fact gods (including this one) were real, and he still wasn't entirely content believing in and serving one… but in a (admittedly stupid) act of curiosity, he granted one of his eyes to the god for her to use in her and her subject's practices. in turn, he's free to use their resources in experiments
webber is entirely unaffiliated with a god he's just kind of hanging out honestly. he was just wandering out in the woods one day when he came across a mutant nightmare horror evil beast. and um. since when you go insane you mutate. and when you see mutant nightmare horror evil beasts you tend to go insane. he sort of went insane a little bit. midway through the attack from the mutant nightmare horror evil beasts (bc their favorite thing to do is eat little boys), their bodies accidentally merged together. its the same webber deal they share the same brain but the boy takes most of the control and the Creature is sort of just in the background. still there though.
thuh urge to draw crossover dst/worship stuff vs the fact that worship isnt real. yet
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jungshookz · 4 years ago
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maybe, she can drive his car; mechanic!yoongi
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➺ pairing; mechanic!yoongi x spoiledbrat!y/n
➺ genre; mechanic!yoongiverse!! sfw!! honk honk humour!! some suggestive behaviour because this is mechanic!yoongi and his y/n we're talking about!! the green-eyed monster inside of y/n is awoken after being dormant for so long and she's ready to bite some heads off
➺ wordcount; 11.6k
➺ summary; yoongi's ex is back in town for a visit and you'd be lying if you said you weren't slightly envious of a) how knowledgeable she is about stupid cars and b) how well she gets along with literally everyone.
➺ what to expect; "right, about that- i know i was supposed to come over for dinner tonight but- listen, i don't know what lisa did but obviously she's got a lot of connections now and the shop has literally never been this busy before... you understand, don't you?"
➺ currently spinning on the record player; mustang sally (originally by wilson pickett, covered by andrew strong)
(unfortunately i wasn’t able to track down the original maker of this gif but this is where i sourced it from! all credits go to the original creator of course :-))
»»————- 🛠️ ————-««
namjoon usually doesn't pay too much attention to you whenever you're hanging out at the workshop with everyone because of how often you're here, but there's something about the way you're acting today that even he has to admit is oddly very...
cute?
and it's not that you're not cute all the time (because you totally are!!) but it's just that the version of you today in particular is suddenly making him want to go off and find a y/n of his own
"whatcha doing?"
namjoon jolts in surprise when a grimy hand suddenly burrows itself into the warm bag of freshly-popped popcorn that he has cradled to his chest and he scowls before turning his body away slightly
"hey, you're contaminating the popcorn, man-" he huffs, quickly grabbing the mega-sized pack of hand wipes from the desk before plopping it down on the countertop for jungkook, "at least have the decency to wipe your hands before digging into my popcorn- also, i'm watching. duh."
"watching?" jungkook frowns as he sloppily wipes his hands on the front of his shirt, turning to look out the open door, "watching what?"
"yoongi and y/n." namjoon hums, popping a couple of kernels into his mouth with a crunch, "she's been following him around like a little duckling all day."
"mm." jungkook props an elbow up on the counter as he looks towards the two of you before clicking his tongue, "...he must've really given it to her good last night if she's acting like that-"
"okay, now you've ruined the moment-" namjoon frowns, his shoulders dropping slightly before he gestures to you guys, "it's sweet! this is obviously a wholesome thing-"
"call it what you want, but all i'm trying to say is that good sex makes you do crazy things-" jungkook snorts before aggressively shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth, "cravy phings."
"i'd like to argue that good sex forms a strong emotional bond which explains why there are cartoon hearts currently floating around y/n's head-" namjoon perks up when he notices the way your eyes light up at something yoongi says, "look at her! look at the way she's looking at him!"
"oh, please." jungkook tuts, "that dopey look on her face is telling me that the only thing on her mind is yoongi bending her over the hood of that car and just ramming-"
"namjoon and jungkook are arguing again." you point out, turning to look towards the office just in time to see namjoon throw a handful of popcorn at jungkook only for him to open his mouth and chomp wildly at the air to get some into his mouth
"jungkook probably said something stupid, as per usual." yoongi snorts, leaning over to lock the hood of the car into place before pulling away and taking a look at the situation, "now, let's see what we have going on here..."
when namjoon told him that this was a brake master cylinder repair he immediately felt all the excitement leave his body
he hates doing brake master cylinder repairs
all the parts are so small and the handiwork is super tedious anD the last time he did one of these he took like four hours to get it done
overall it's a pretty boring repair job and as much as he wants to pass it off to one of the others to do, he knows that he's the most skilled with the internal mechanics of a car compared to everyone else which he usually likes to brag about but today he wishes that that wasn't the case
"so what do you have to do?" you frown, stepping over so that you're standing by the side of the car and you're not in yoongi's way, "all the thingies look fine to me."
"well, i actually need to replace the brake master cylinder thingy." yoongi teases, smiling lightly as he points at some kind of container, "there's a leak in the seals, which is pretty common since they wear out after a few years. it should be an easy fix! it'll just take a while, that's all."
luckily, taehyung already took care of the messy part and emptied the fluid from the reservoir for him so now it's time to start the actual repair process
"so does beeper have one of these cylinders in him?" you ask, tilting your head in curiosity
you've never actually taken a look at beeper's under the hood situation before so you wouldn't know
(it feels like he's all naked and exposed whenever yoongi lifts his hood up and you just want to give beeper some privacy, that's all.)
"if beeper didn't have one of these cylinders in him, you wouldn't be able to brake, silly." yoongi snorts, reaching down to unclip the sensor from the reservoir, "see, when you push down on the brake, it pushes a piston through the cylinder and forces hydraulic fluid through the brake lines, which goes to the slave cylinders of each wheel, and then-" he pauses when he notices you've gone all quiet and he turns to see you staring directly at him with a dopey little smile on your face "-what? what'd i say?"
"i like it when you talk shop to me." you giggle quietly, "i mean, i don't understand 98% of the words that come out of your mouth when you do, but i still like it a lot-"
"yeah?" yoongi teases, taking a hand off the edge of the car so he can gesture for you to come closer (and you do, obviously), "you like it when i talk to you about... hm, i don't know..." he feigns cluelessness as he stands up to slink an arm around your waist and bring you towards him while your arms automatically hang loosely around his neck, "how the rubbing of the brake pad against the brake disc generates friction..." he lowers his voice as he sits lightly on the edge of the car and gives your hips a squeeze
"mm, tell me more..." you play along, letting yoongi pull you closer so that you're settled nicely in between his legs
"i don't know, maybe i should save all the good stuff for the bedroom..."
you resist the urge to immediately start whining when you lean in only for yoongi to dodge your kiss, "hey, i like you in these baggy overalls, by the way." he suddenly changes the subject and you feel your cheeks flush when both his hands slide in through the gaps until he's able to grip your bum, "big, big fan of them-"
"you- namjoon and jungkook are right there-" you gawk, "at least have the decency to turn me around so they don't see you fully groping me-"
"they can always just close their eyes or something-"
"okay, you two, break it up-!" you hear namjoon's claps echoing from the office as he tries to get your attention and you immediately turn to look at him with a grin, "god, it's like you sick freaks want to rub it in our faces-"
"okay, i have to get to work so why don't you go and hang out with namjoon in the office?" yoongi stands up, being careful not to hit the top of his head on the hood, "he'll let you play chess on the computer if you ask nicely."
"i thought i was helping you out today!" you frown, grabbing onto his hand before waving it back and forth, "you said i did a good job handing you the tools and stuff. i'm getting better at not mixing all the different types of screwdrivers up!"
yoongi can't help but laugh at how needy you're being and he reaches up with his free hand to adjust his bandana
"i know you wanna help, but i promise you there's nothing exciting about repairing a master cylinder." he hums, reaching up to pinch your cheek playfully, "plus, don't you still have a huge research paper to work on?"
"yeah, but i'd much rather hang out with you..." you pout, yoongi cooing before leaning in to give your pushed-out bottom lip a little kiss
"we can hang out when we're both done with work."
"okay..." you purse your lips before letting go of his hand, "it's your loss. i'm a fantastic helper."
"mhm, you certainly are-" yoongi spins you around before pushing his palm against your lower back to get you to move, "now go and bug namjoon!"
you turn back to glance at yoongi one last time and he sweeps his hands at you to tell you to gO
fine!
it was getting hot in the garage anyway and namjoon always has the aircon blasting in the office
"sorry! only sad, single people are allowed in this area-" namjoon jokes as soon as you step in, gesturing to the office space with a grin, "leave or i'll have security escort you out."
"oh, stop it." you giggle, folding your arms up on the counter and leaning forward, "i keep telling you i'd be more than happy to set you up with one of my friends!!"
"i know, and that's very nice of you to offer, but i just want to find someone organically, you know?" namjoon sighs, leaning back against his chair before looking up at the ceiling wistfully, "being set up with someone doesn't feel like a natural process."
"namjoon thinks he's the main character of a shitty netflix romantic comedy." jungkook mutters, the two of you exchanging low giggles with each other
"well, if no one comes into your life organically you can always let me know and i'll- woah-" you jump in surprise when the sound of a roaring engine suddenly shatters the peaceful atmosphere and you turn around just in time to see a sleek car veering into the shop
you wince and raise a hand to shield your eyes from the bright headlights and you don't get a chance to make the first comment because jungkook beats you to it
(for the record, you were going to talk about how dramatic of an entrance whatever that was)
"oh my god. that is the sexiest car i've ever seen in my entire life." he breathes out, stepping away from the counter so he can stand by the door and get a closer look, "a 1965 mustang. nice."
"fun fact: i was actually thinking about getting a vintage mustang! i wanted an olive green one because i could've named her 'olive' which is super cute-" you nod enthusiastically, looking back and forth between namjoon and jungkook only for them to.,., completely ignore you and continue staring at the glossy mustang sitting out front
"okay, you guys, it's just a car-" you roll your eyes and let out a little snort of disbelief, "this isn't going to change your life or anything-"
a high-heel clad foot steps out of the car and onto the pavement and you immediately recognize the classic red-bottom louboutins
you actually own a pair of them as well but you rarely wear them out because you're always paranoid that you're going to topple over and snap an ankle and that would be completely mortifying
they're six inches tall!!!!
for the record, they look very nice sitting (collecting dust) on your shelf but now you're starting to think that it might be a good idea to wear them out again because this stranger makes it look like walking in them is easy breezy beautiful
"holy shit. is that lisa?" namjoon murmurs, reaching up to push his glasses up the bridge of his nose, "oh, wow. she..."
"i don't remember her looking like that the last time we saw her." jungkook whistles lowly, "hello, miss manoban."
"lisa- who's lisa?" you frown, tilting your head in curiosity as you watch this mysterious lisa toss her oversized sunglasses into the front seat of the car before slamming the door shut
"uh, she's just one of yoongi's exes- she actually used to work here but-" namjoon reaches over the counter so he can nudge you aside gently to get a better look, "when did she get a vintage mustang?!"
lisa leans down to look at herself in the side mirror, smearing some red lipstick over her pillowy bottom lip before rubbing her lips together and nodding satisfactorily
"guess her car-wrapping business really took off." jungkook hums, his eyes glued to the car
she seems to be moving in slow motion as she takes her hair down and shakes her head back and forth, the three of you tilting your heads at the same time as you watch her in awe
"car-wrapping?" you ask curiously, "she must spend a fortune on wrapping paper and giant bows-"
"no, obviously it's not actual wrapping- like-" jungkook huffs and you resist the urge to bop him over the head at how snappy he's being with you when he already knows you're clueless when it comes to this kind of stuff, "okay, you know how you said that if you ever got a g-wagon for yourself one day that you wanted to make it baby blue just like beeper and also matte? lisa could do that for you."
"oh! in that case, it might be nice to get a business card from her or something-" you make a mental note before shaking your head and turning back around to face namjoon, "hey, so, super casual, can we round back to the whole 'yoongi's ex' thing real quickly because i-"
"yoohoo, boys!" lisa whistles, grinning excitedly when she's suddenly joined by everyone outside one by one, "what, no one thought to roll out the red carpet for me?"
"c'mon, namjoon! let's go say hi to lisa and her vintage 'stang!!" jungkook grins, gesturing for namjoon to hurry before he's darting out the door, "lisa, hey!"
"yeah, okay!!" namjoon gets up from his seat so quickly that he sends his chair rolling back and smacking against the file cabinets, "oh, y/n-! if anyone calls, just send them straight to voicemail-"
"but i-" you don't get a chance to say anything before namjoon's brushing past you and dashing out the door as well
you don't know too much about lisa but obviously she's a pretty big deal around here
it'd probably be good for you to go and introduce yourself instead of awkwardly hanging out in the office by yourself
"hello, lisa. it's very nice to meet you. firm handshake." you mutter to yourself as you step out of the office and head towards the bustling group of boys, "hey, lisa! so great to meet you. firm handshake. hi, girlie-! nope, don't like that one-"
"-in town for business so i thought it'd be nice to swing by and visit my boys." you manage to catch the end of lisa's sentences as you join the boys, trying not to make any sudden movements to catch her attention
"you should've texted one of us or something!" namjoon pulls his phone out of his back pocket, "we could've ordered a pizza for lunch-"
you reach over to give the back of yoongi's jumpsuit a little tug just to get his attention and he glances over his shoulder at you before offering you a teasing smile and reaching back to wiggle his fingers against your stomach
you giggle lightly before swatting his hand away and he turns back to look at lisa
"well, i wanted to surprise you guys!" lisa chirps, tucking her clutch underneath her armpit before clapping her hands together, "i see nothing's changed around here... except for..." you feel your heart drop when she suddenly leans over and looks directly at you, "hello! i don't think we've ever met."
"oh, shoot- sorry, i should've introduced you sooner-" yoongi steps aside so that he isn't blocking you, "lisa, this is y/n! y/n, this is lisa." he smiles, gesturing towards lisa, "my girlfriend." he pauses and quickly shakes his head at his little flub-up, "i mean- lisa, this is y/n, my girlfriend-"
"he's definitely gonna pay for that later." jimin mutters, jungkook snickering before nudging at his side to get him to shut up
"it's super nice to meet you, y/n!" lisa doesn't acknowledge yoongi's error and she steps forward to get closer to you
she's practically towering over you but it's really just because of the stilettos
she turns her head to look at the boys and a second of silence goes by before they realize what she's asking of them and they all scatter in different directions
you give yoongi a look that basically screams S.O.S. and you resist the urge to burst into tears when he gives you a cheery thumbs up in return and trots off to go and do something else
okay
you'll be fine
you have nothing to be nervous about!
this is just yoongi's very hot ex who looks like a million bucks while you'e currently dressed like a giant toddler
it doesn't help that you're wearing what's commonly known as a 'baby tee' under these overalls
"you- yeah, you too-" you chuckle uneasily, giving her a weak handshake before pulling away with a smile, "i'm sorry, i'm a little underdressed-" you pause to gesture to the grubby overalls you have on, "i promise i look better than this most of the time..."
"oh, don't be silly. i just grabbed the first outfit i saw out of my suitcase and threw it on-" she sighs, reaching up to pick some lint off her blazer that you're pretty sure you saw in the most recent YSL spring catalog (in fact, you're pretty sure it's on your to-buy list), "so, what do you do?"
"me? i- uh, well, nothing, at the moment- i'm still studying for my undergraduate degree, so..." you shrug sheepishly, reaching up to scratch the back of your neck
for some reason you can't seem to maintain eye contact with her for more than three seconds at a time
"oh! you're still in school?"
"yeah, i- well, i'm graduating this year, so i'm almost out of school if you think about it that way- but yes. yes, i... am currently a university student, so that's what i'm doing."
"mm, cute! what are you studying?"
"history! i'm a history major and a marine biology minor." you nod, "so... the cold war and... like, sharks. something like that."
"ah, very cool."
to be honest you're not entirely sure if lisa's being sincere or not but you'll take the compliment either way
you can tell she's trying to scope you out - which is fair, because this is the first time you two are meeting and you're currently involved with someone she used to be involved with
"i'm sorry. i'm probably, like, freaking you out right now, aren't i?" lisa snorts, reaching out and placing her hand on your forearm for a split second, "i promise i'm just genuinely curious and i'm not trying to, like, interrogate you or anything. it's super nice to meet you! and honestly- i love the overalls. the little knee patches are adorable."
"oh, thank you..." you smile nervously, reaching down to glance at the mismatched patches of fabric sewn onto the knees of your overalls, "yoongi actually sewed 'em on for me! i usually wear this whenever i'm here because i'm okay with getting it dirty- i, um, i like your blazer! and your heels. and your purse- a chanel clutch is a classic!"
"ooh, someone has an eye for fashion..." lisa winks, raising her clutch and waving it slightly, "maybe after i'm done talking business with yoongi we can talk about gucci's new multicolour line-"
"oh, i have so many thoughts on gucci's new multicolour line!" you gasp, suddenly reignited with a spurt of energy, "honestly the colour scheme is very stabilo highlighters to me but we can talk about it later- i'll just be hanging out in the office, so you can find me there whenever you're ready-"
"perfect!" lisa gives you a thumbs up before pointing over to where yoongi is, "if you'll excuse me, i have to go and talk about boring things with yoongi-"
"mhm!" you watch with a smile as lisa click-clacks off towards yoongi before you spin around on your heels, giving yourself a mental pat on the back for how well you handled that interaction
lisa's actually nicer than you thought she'd be!
obviously the saying don't judge a book by its cover is very applicable here
"so... what'd you think of lisa?" namjoon joins your side before nudging you gently, "she's nice, right?"
"i like her! she seems really cool." you nod enthusiastically, pausing to glance over your shoulder to look at her from behind, "i need to ask her for tips on walking in those louboutins and how not to fall over."
"you know, i must say i'm pleasantly surprised at how you're handling this." namjoon snorts, holding back for a second to let you into the office first before he steps in behind you, "colour me impressed!"
"thank you!" you reach over to pull the lollipop jar towards you before suddenly pausing and looking back over at namjoon with a frown, "hold on a sec, what's that supposed to mean?"
"hm? oh, it's nothing." namjoon scrunches his nose, dismissing you with a flick of his wrist as he takes his seat behind the counter, "i just know that if i was in your shoes and my significant other's very attractive and very successful ex came back i would be a little antsy about it-" namjoon glances up from the computer and his eyes widen in panic when he notices that your eyes have widened in panic, "i- i mean- not that you're not very attractive and very successful- what i'm trying to say is that you have nothing to worry- you and yoongi seem like a very stable couple so-"
"do you think maybe you could tell me a bit about yoongi and lisa?" you interrupt his spiral and you feel yourself starting to get a little fidgety, "because i- i actually don't know anything about that situation-"
namjoon has a point, now that you think about it
lisa is very successful and very attractive and can walk in high heels very elegantly
and what about you?
yesterday you submitted a paper one minute before the deadline because of how much procrastinating you had done
and you haven't worn heels in forever because they just hurt so much
but lisa wouldn't complain about her feet hurting in high heels
lisa could have a hundred blisters and still walk into the room with a beautiful, red-lipped smile
"has he never told you about her?" namjoon frowns, "i feel like every couple should at least have one conversation about their past relationships."
"i think he tried to one time, but i- i dunno, you can't blame me for not wanting to sit there and listen to yoongi talking about all the girls he's been with, so i just changed the subject..." you mutter, pushing the jar away from you after pulling a strawberry lollipop out, "kind of regretting that decision now."
it's not like you have a reason to be insecure or anything, right?
your relationship with yoongi is very solid and there are certainly no trust issues or communication issues or anything of the sort
...
but he is your first boyfriend...,., and this is your first serious relationship which means you've had no prior experiences to learn from which means you're just going with the flow most of the time.,., so is it possible that you're being a little naïve right now?
"still, i don't think me telling you all the details of their relationship is a good idea because i feel like this is a conversation you should be having with yoongi-" namjoon chuckles nervously, leaning back against his chair before tucking a pencil behind his ear, "sorry, kiddo. i'm not trying to stir the pot here."
"i- oh, c'mon, joon- what's it gonna take, huh?" you reach into the front pocket of your overalls before subtly flashing a folded up hundred dollar bill, pursing your lips slightly as your eyes flicker back and forth between namjoon and your chest-money, "hm??"
"first of all, it's very concerning to me that you stash loose cash in your pocket like that. second of all, are you really trying to bribe me into telling you about yoongi and lisa?" namjoon asks incredulously
"what?! no!" you scoff, tucking the bill back into your pocket before pausing and raising an eyebrow, "...is it working?"
"no! in fact, i find it offensive that you think i'd be so easily swayed-"
"the next time i bring sushi for lunch, i'll get you your own mango shrimp tempura roll." you offer, namjoon staring at you blankly before he suddenly springs into action
"so, they used to sleep together, obviously." he clears his throat, "when lisa started working here, i kind of expected her to get involved with one of us and unsurprisingly it was yoongi, because... well, it's yoongi- i'm pretty sure it was a friends with benefits kind of thing because i remember asking him about it and he said they didn't want to put a label on it? and then at one point jimin asked lisa about it because all of us were super curious and she called it a 'situationship'... which, personally, i think is a pretty cheesy label- i dunno, they'd go out to dinners sometimes and occasionally they'd come into work together in the morning because- well, you know- uh, they were in this 'situationship' for... maybe, like, eight months? and then lisa got an opportunity to work elsewhere and she took it and they decided to call it off and fast forward to now... here we are!" namjoon claps his hands together before pressing his palm over his heart, "and i promise you that's all the information i have- well, maybe this piece of information might be useful to you: they were, like, super horny for each other all the time. like, almost outrageously horny, which i think is one of the downfalls of the relationship because you can't base a solid relationship off of animalistic sex, right? ooh, there was one time i caught them in yoongi's office and lisa was-"
"okay, i think that's enough-!" you hold a hand out to shut namjoon up and he shrugs before leaning back against his chair, "more than enough, actually-"
you weren't expecting to learn about the raw, animalistic sex yoongi had with lisa, but then again, you weren't expecting to even meet lisa at all
oh, god
should you be nervous??
you shouldn't be nervous, right??
...yeah, you're being ridiculous!
yoongi has been with other girls before and that shouldn't bother you because you didn't exist then
this has nothing to do with you!
so what if he bent her over the office table and-
okay, maybe it's time to stop thinking about this because the point is: you're fine. don't worry. everything is normal. yoongi is your boyfriend. lisa is his ex. everything is great!
"by the way, i want you to know that you honestly have nothing to worry about." namjoon suddenly chimes in as if he can read your mind, "lisa was yoongi's past but you are his present and most likely his future as well, so- seriously, don't even worry about it."
"yeah, you're right. it'd be silly of me to be upset about yoongi being with someone else when i wasn't even in the picture yet." you snort, reaching up to smack your own forehead gently, "okay! i'm feeling a little better. it would've been nice to not be informed about how horny they were for each other, but thank you for that detail-"
"yo, where are the snap ring pliers from my toolbox?" you turn just in time to see yoongi pop his head in, "i can't find them anywhere... i swear to god, everyone keeps borrowing my tools and 'forgetting' to put them back-" he rolls his eyes before looking over at you with a smile, "hi, baby-"
"hi yoongi-" you giggle, all your doubts and insecurities immediately fluttering away
see? nothing to worry about!
phEw
it feels like a weight's been lifted off your shoulders
"i think hoseok might've been using them earlier this morning." namjoon hums, "what do you need them for?"
"oh, lisa offered to help me out with the master cylinder repair and she needs 'em." yoongi points back over his shoulder, "you know how great she is with her hands-"
"woah, i thought-" your voice cracks slightly and you clear your throat, "i thought, uh- you were working on it yourself? like, i thought you didn't need any help and that's why i'm in here-"
"oh, i don't, but- well, lisa's good with fine-tuning so i might as well take advantage of her expertise while she's here." yoongi snorts before looking back over at namjoon, "you said hoseok had them?"
"yep!"
you bite down on your tongue to keep yourself from commenting any further
it's fine!
as we've already established, you have nothing to worry about.
...right?
»»————- 🛠️ ————-««
"and... voilà!" you smile satisfactorily to yourself after you set the scented candle down on the coffee table
the living room is going to smell like warm brown sugar and cinnamon in a few minutes and you can't wait
this is yoongi's favourite candle so you hope he'll be excited about that when he gets here :'))
you've been preparing the apartment for his arrival and lighting the candle was one of the last things on your to-do list
you still have to order dinner for tonight and you've always been awful at making decisions so you figured it'd be best to let yoongi choose instead
you haven't seen him for about a week and a half because of finals (and, being perfectly honest, you were the one who implemented this distancing rule in the first place because you know you won't be able to focus on studying when yoongi's in the apartment with you) so you're pretty pumped for tonight!!
you hum to yourself as you click on yoongi's phone number in your contacts, flopping back on the couch with a fwump! while your legs swing lazily over the arm
"hello?"
the phone picks up after a couple of rings and it takes you a second to realize that the voice on the other end certainly does not belong to your boyfriend
"he-" you pause, pulling your phone away from your ear and frowning at the unfamiliar voice before bringing it back, "um, hello?"
"hi! who's this?"
"who's this?" you point to yourself before scoffing lightly, "what do you mean who- who's this?"
"oh- oh, y/n! hey, it's lisa!" lisa greets enthusiastically and you relax a little knowing that it's just lisa, "sorry, i didn't look at the contact name before picking up- what's up?"
"well, i-" you pause again to recollect your thoughts, "um, sorry, i guess i was just expecting yoongi to pick up his own phone so i'm a little lost right now-"
"oh my gosh, don't even worry about it! yoongi's hands are super gross right now so i offered to take his call for him which is why i picked up the phone. is there something you wanted me to pass along to him?"
"yeah, you could pass his phone right along to him-" you joke before reminding yourself to keep the unnecessary cattiness to a minimum, "yeah, um- can you ask him what time he's coming over? so that i know what time to order our food and stuff? i want the food to still be nice and hot by the time he gets here, so i just need a time from him, that's all-"
"yeah, about that... i actually don't think yoongi's going to make it for dinner."
"i-" you frown, pushing yourself up so that you're leaning back against an elbow, "what? why not?"
"the thing is, i hooked him up with a bunch of clients so the poor thing's been working like a dog all day and it looks like he's going to be stuck here for a while... if you're worried about him skipping dinner, i can totally go and get some food for him if you want! there's this sandwich place a block away and i know what he likes-"
your eyes widen slightly at how... happy? lisa sounds about the fact that yoongi potentially won't be joining you for dinner and you nod to yourself as you clench your jaw
"that's- that's very kind of you, lisa-" your voice is a little pitchier than usual at this point and you clear your throat obnoxiously, "i'm sorry, i just really have to talk to yoongi for a second so if you could just, like, hold the phone up to his ear that would be okay too-"
"okay! gimme a sec." there's a bit of shuffling on the other end and you press your lips together as you wait (im)patiently, "yoongs! it's y/n... dinner... hot food... her place... clients... pretty busy tonight..."
and she even has a nickname for him
that's just downright adorable, isn't it?
"god, just give him the damn phone." you mutter under your breath, raising your other hand to inspect your cuticles as you lie back down on the couch
hm
you should probably schedule another manicure soon
"-it's okay, i can hold the phone myself- y/n?" you perk up when you hear yoongi on the other end and you can't help but kick your legs in excitement
you can't help it!!!
you haven't heard his voice in a whole week and a half!!!
"greetings, yoongs." you tease, "what time are you going to be here?" you bypass lisa's whole monologue about yoongi probably not being able to come over tonight in hopes that she'll be wrong about him ditching you to continue working, "i wanna order the food so it'll get here a little before you arrive. also, i haven't chosen what we're going to eat tonight so you're going to have to choose for us-"
"right, about that-" yoongi clears his throat, "i know i was supposed to come over for dinner tonight but- listen, i don't know what lisa did but obviously she's got a lot of connections now and the shop has literally never been this busy before..." he pauses and you hear the sound of loud clanging in the background, "you understand, don't you?"
it takes you a couple of seconds to process the fact that yoongi really won't be coming over tonight and you puff your cheeks out to keep yourself from immediately whining in protest
to say the least, you are.,.,,. very disappointed,.., but!! it won't be the end of the world, right?
you hate that lisa was right, but that's a conversation you can have with yourself another time
and if yoongi won't be here, that means you can hog all the garlic cheesy bread to yourself so maybe this is a blessing in disguise >:-)
"no, yeah, i- yeah, get it!" you nod, "i love that business is booming, i just don't love that you didn't text me or call me earlier to let me know you weren't going to come over tonight," you frown, turning your head to look at the flickering candle, "a heads up would've been nice, that's all..."
"i asked lisa to text you earlier when my hands were full... sorry, she must've forgot..."
"oh. yeah, i guess it could've slipped her mind." you respond dryly, "it would've taken, like, five seconds to text me-"
"okay, i-" you hear yoongi let out a small sigh before he speaks up again, "i'm sorry, baby, i really am- do you- i can come over now if you want me t-"
"no, it's okay! i'm sorry, i'm just-" you shake your head quickly before chuckling uneasily, "i just haven't seen you in a while so i miss you, that's all- but i'll let you get back to work now and i'll see you later?"
"yes! you are the best, you really are- look, i promise i'll be all yours as soon as i-"
"yoongi! these tires aren't going to change themselves, silly-"
"oh, c'mon-" you grumble, your teeth grinding slightly at the interruption of lisa's peppy voice in the background
"uh- yeah, in a sec-! i gotta go, doll- i'll call you later-"
"okay, b-" you don't get a chance to even say goodbye before the line goes dead and the only thing you can hear is an obnoxious beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep- "-ye."
»»————- 🛠️ ————-««
one of your goals for the new year was to try your best to not hold a grudge
admittedly, holding grudges is one of your specialties so it's been a little bit difficult but you think you've been doing an okay job so far!
like that time jungkook accidentally drowned you with dirty car water because he didn't see you and also he had headphones on so he couldn't hear you
you were ready to strangle him right then and there but you just took a deep breath and reminded yourself that *~deep-cleaning services exist~*
and sure, you were a little upset that yoongi couldn't make it for dinner the other night and that the two of you haven't really had a chance to have a moment alone because of how swamped he's been with work, but... well, the past is in the past and challenges like this are good for your personal growth!
plus, it's the start of a new week so you're just going to focus on the present
you try your best to keep your footsteps as quiet as possible as you approach a preoccupied yoongi from behind
he's currently sorting out all the things to do on his giant whiteboard (you bought this for the boys because you thought it'd be a good way to organize all their tasks and unsurprisingly, namjoon was the most excited about it)
"guess who?" you hold your hands over yoongi's eyes with a giddy smile and he immediately spins around to face you
"hey, what are you doing here?" yoongi asks, leaning down to give you a quick kiss before pulling away to check the time on his watch, "aren't you supposed to be in class right now?"
"my history seminar was cancelled because my professor had some kind of an emergency so i thought i'd come and have lunch with you guys!" you hum, reaching over to fix the thin silver chain hanging around yoongi's neck, "i was going to pick the food up before coming here but i didn't want to just choose for everyone so i thought it'd be better to get everyone's orders first-"
"oh, you don't have to do that, baby-" yoongi shakes his head, capping the marker and dropping it back into the wire holder, "lisa actually offered to treat us to lunch- apparently there's some bagel place that has, like, a hundred different fillings-"
"lisa's here?" you interrupt, suddenly straightening your back before looking around quickly, "i... was not aware that lisa was... still here! i thought she was only here for a little while-"
"mm, she ended up extending her stay! one of her clients pushed their appointment to thursday so she came over to help out for the day."
"oh, cool." you nod, pressing your lips together as you take a second to sort through your thoughts
your nose scrunches slightly as you weigh the pros and cons of saying what you're about to say to yoongi
...
it won't kill you to ask, right?
"hey, i don't wanna, um-" you pause, "you know, i don't wanna... be that girlfriend, but... do you think that there's a slight possibility that lisa might still have feelings for you?"
a moment of silence goes by before yoongi practically barks out a laugh of disbelief
"what? lisa? no, no- that- no, don't be ridiculous." he snorts, shaking his head before turning back around to face the whiteboard, "lisa most certainly does not still have feelings for me- and, by the way, she was the one who broke things off with me, so if anything, i should be the one who still has feelings for-" he stops himself midway and presses his lips together before turning to glance at you over his shoulder, "you know, i'm hearing the words coming out of my mouth and i... am going to shut up now."
"mm, good choice." you raise a brow before shrugging, "alright, well, i just- you know, it's a possibility but if you say that lisa doesn't still have feelings for you, then i believe you-"
"alright, boys! it's chow time!"
you turn your head to see lisa waltzing into the shop carrying two large paper bags and the rest of the boys immediately rush over to her like moths to a flame
she brought bagels for lunch?
you're not trying to be biased or anything sandwiches are easier to eat, in your personal opinion
you basically have to unhinge your jaw to get a good bite of a bagel
"y/n!" lisa looks more than surprised at your presence when you and yoongi walk over the join the group, "i wasn't aware you were going to be here today- yoongi told me that you had class so i-" she pauses to set the bags down on the table, "oh my goodness, i am so sorry but i really didn't know you'd be joining us for lunch... yoongi, you could've texted me or something-"
"she just got here!" yoongi shrugs as he takes a seat at the table, "don't pin this on me-"
"ah, i probably look like such a jerk right now..." lisa winces, scratching the back of her head before reaching down to grab a bagel out of one of the paper bags, "here! you can take my bagel-"
"no, no, it's alright!" you hold your hands out before shaking them, "don't be silly, you don't have to do that- it's very nice of you to offer but i- it's alright, you go ahead and enjoy yourself!"
"oh, stop- take the bagel, y/n." lisa scoffs playfully, practically shoving the bagel into your arms before rummaging through the bags again, "i'll just share a bagel with yoongi! you don't mind, right, yoongs?"
"yeah, i had a snack earlier so i'm not, like, starving or anything-" yoongi nods, "what kind of filling is it?"
"this one is..." lisa pauses to look at the sticker on the top, "smoked salmon and dill cream cheese with capers."
"yoongi doesn't like capers." you chime in, suddenly feeling the need to prove to everyone that you know your boyfriend very well, "i remember they were sprinkled in a salad one time and he said they were too salty-"
"eh, i'll survive. i can always just pick 'em out." yoongi shrugs nonchalantly and you can't help but purse your lips in mild frustration at his response
"'atta boy! luckily, they're already sliced in half otherwise we'd have to take turns taking bites which would be weird-"
"agreed." you mutter, peeling the label off your bagel and sticking it onto the side instead
"oh, lisa! i was wondering if maybe you could help me out with some custom headlights i'm working on?" hoseok perks up, "i'm having some trouble getting the halo lights to work and i need your magic hands-"
"mhm! i can definitely check them out after lunch-" lisa grins, taking a seat next to yoongi, "anyone need a napkin?"
"yes, please!"
"i need one too-"
"pass one over here-"
you know it's silly of you to be feeling jealous over this because god knows the only thing you know about cars is that key go in and car go vroom so obviously the boys would never ask you to help them out with anything like how they're asking lisa to help out
and you're trying very hard to noT throw a self-pity party but it's getting harder and harder to not to that
(and it certainly doesn't help that there aren't any more seats left at the table)
you just can't help but feel so!!!!! inferior!!!!! compared to lisa
she's so cool and pretty and witty and obviously very knowledgable about cars
and what are you bringing to the table??
ham and cheese sandwiches??? fancy sushi rolls????
obviously not anymore because they've been replaced by these stupid bagels
this is the first time you haven't been able to throw money at a problem and you're not,.., sure.,., how you feel about it,..,
"i, uh, have to work on a paper, so i think i'm going to go and eat this in the office if anyone wants to come with?" you clear your throat quietly as you start to back away from the table slowly, "...or i can just go fuck myself, which is fine too."
you're not entirely surprised when your comment isn't acknowledged by anyone and you nod to yourself before swiftly turning on your heel and trying your best not to storm towards the office
you force your fists to uncurl and your shoulders to relax slightly but you can't help but make a face when you hear the boys laughing obnoxiously at one of lisa's jokes
of course she has to be funny as well
because the woman literally has zero flaws
you've been trying to find a reason to hate her and so far you haven't found anything negative to say
hating someone for having perfectly styled hair is a little odd
the legs of the chair screech against the floor as you pull it out and plop down
whatever
you like eating alone anyway
you unwrap the parchment paper and pick up the bagel before taking an overly aggressive bite of it, your cheeks practically bursting from how much food is currently in your mouth
you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand as you chew, tossing the bagel back onto the wrapper with a thunk!
...
damnit!
this is the best goddamn bagel you've ever had in your entire life!!
"phtupid phriggin' bavhel." you grumble, reaching up to wipe the sauce off the corner of your mouth before swallowing roughly, "even the mayo is delicious! god, what is this? some kind of garlic mayo-"
"oh my god. i think she's finally lost it." you jolt upon hearing jungkook's voice and you turn to see him and jimin standing at the door
"what's your problem?" jimin asks, the two of them walking over to join you at your sad, lonely table
"what? nothing. i don't have a problem." you shake your head stubbornly, "i just- i just wanted to be alone, that doesn't mean something's wrong-"
"is that why you're in here basically yelling at a bagel?" jungkook points out as he pulls out a chair and sits on your right
"i'm- i'm just stressed about- my paper. or whatever. it's whatever, i'm fine-"
"you can talk to us, you know." you frown when jungkook suddenly reaches over and in an uncharacteristic move, places both hands over yours
"is it about lisa?" jimin asks, crinkling his nose as he sits down as well, "it's about lisa, isn't it?"
"no, it's not-" you press your lips together before letting out a light laugh, "you know, i don't even have a reason to be upset about lisa, right? she's super cool and very nice and knows a lot about cars and is yoongi's age and namjoon blessed me with the knowledge that she, apparently, was a very passionate lover- so i have nothing to be upset about!" you snap, slapping your palm down on the table before wincing and cradling your hand to your chest, "...everything is fine."
"i have to say, i really don't think jealousy is a good look on you." jungkook clicks his tongue before glancing down at your feet, "i also don't know if those shoes are a good look on you- jeez, it's like the people at gucci are just pulling design elements out of a hat-"
"you are not making me feel any better, jungkook- these shoes are new!"
"ooh, you should make him jealous!" jungkook suddenly lights up and the fluorescent light hanging above you guys flickers for a second
"we're going to have to round back to my shoes later because i really don't think they're that bad-"
"you should make him jealous and give him a taste of his own medicine..." jungkook trails off, ignoring your previous comments once again, "it's what you deserve."
"i'm not- i'm not doing that." you chuckle uneasily, "are you serious? this isn't high school and getting him back would just be petty of me-"
"but it'd feel so nice to be petty, don't you think?" jungkook encourages, scooting a little closer to you with a devilish grin, "think about it, y/n. don't you wanna see yoongi get all hot and possessive over you-"
"i don't think it's a good idea." jimin chimes in, shaking his head quickly as he moves in closer as well, "because if yoongi finds out you orchestrated something just to get him back, that might create an issue of trust in the relationship, and that would be very, very bad-"
"oh, but it feels so good to be bad..." jungkook coos, poking your arm with his pointer finger, "so, so good..."
"uh, i don't think so! i'd like to argue that it feels bad to be bad-"
"don't listen to jimin, he's a wuss-"
"don't listen to jungkook, he's an idiot-!"
"okay, cut it out!" you snap, shoving your hands into both their chests to keep them from coming any closer, "i... must admit, i do want to do something to piss yoongi off because of how much he's pissed me off, but... i'm not like that, you know? and i don't want to come off as some crazy girlfriend because-" you pause when you notice jungkook's finger creeping closer and closer to your bagel and you immediately deflate as soon as you realize what's going on here, "oh my god. you guys only came in here because you wanted to try my bagel, didn't you?"
jungkook and jimin exchange knowing glances before looking up at you sheepishly
"yeah, that makes more sense-" you snort, rolling your eyes before pushing the bagel away from you, "have at it, you animals."
you lean back against your chair, stroking your chin in thought as the sound of jungkook and jimin bickering over who gets the bigger half of the bagel starts to fade out
to be petty or not to be petty, that is the question...
»»————- 🛠️ ————-««
(spoiler alert: the answer to the previous question is to be petty. very, very petty.) »»————- 🛠️ ————-««
"namjoon! where did you put my keys??" yoongi calls out, yanking open another drawer to rifle through its contents, "i'm supposed to pick y/n up from campus and i can't find them anywhere... i don't want her to just stand there waiting for me..."
"looking for these?"
yoongi looks up to see lisa standing by the door with his keys in her hand before she tosses them to him
"yes! you're a lifesaver, thanks-" he catches them with one hand before stepping out from behind the counter, "i thought you were leaving today? we already said goodbye to you this morning-"
"yeah, i know-" lisa chuckles as she steps into the office, "it's just that... well, i was going to just leave but i actually had something i needed to talk to you about before i left. i felt it wouldn't be fair to either one of us if i didn't say anything."
"mm. what's up?" yoongi hums, sticking his hand into the lollipop jar to pull a cherry flavoured one out
he pulls another one out before tucking it into his pocket (one for you when he picks you up!)
"well, i guess i should just go ahead and say it- just gotta rip the bandaid off-" lisa straightens her blazer before clearing her throat, "yes."
"...yes?" yoongi frowns, unwrapping his lollipop before popping it into his mouth and scrunching up the wrapper, "i'm not following. yes to what?"
"oh, don't play dumb-" lisa snorts, flicking her wrist at him, "yes, as in: i would love to rekindle our friends with benefits situationship-"
"woah, what?!" yoongi immediately chokes and he yanks the lollipop out of his mouth before patting his chest roughly, "what are you- what the hell are you talking about??"
"what do you mean what the hell am i talking about??" lisa stares at him incredulously before shaking her head, "you're the one who's been giving me secret signals all week-"
"signals-" yoongi's gawks, "what signals??"
"you know, like, how you cancelled dinner plans with her so you could be with me..." lisa croons, taking a step closer towards him
"i cancelled dinner plans with y/n so i could be with twenty cars-" yoongi inches to the side so he can make a quick getaway to run behind the counter in case lisa pounces, "which, i'm realizing doesn't make me sound like the best boyfriend but- i most certainly didn't cancel just to spend private time with you, no offence-"
"what about when we shared a bagel and you didn't complain about the capers??" lisa snaps, lunging towards yoongi only for him to quickly spin out of the way and hurry to get behind the counter
"uh, we shared a bagel because i wasn't hungry for a full bagel and i thought you weren't either, and also-" yoongi grabs namjoon's wheely chair as a makeshift barrier between him and lisa, "i'm a grown man, i'm not going to throw a fit over some friggin' capers-"
"how about when i squeezed your arm and asked you if you'd been working out and you totally flexed your arm for me??" lisa grabs the arms of the chair before yanking and aggressively rolling it behind her, yoongi's eyes widening in panic at the sudden empty space in between the two of them
"i flexed it to prove to you that i have indeed been working out-!" yoongi hops up onto the counter as soon as lisa darts towards him and he hurries to jump off so he's on the other side of it, knocking the phone and namjoon's pen holder down onto the ground in the process, "friends can ask each other if they've been hitting the gym!! i squeeze namjoon's arms all the time because his biceps are literally boulders-"
"i just feel like we have unfinished business, you know?" lisa whines, pausing for a second before bringing a hand up to bite down on the tip of her pointer finger teasingly, "plus, you have to admit that our sex was super hot-"
"are you- hello, i'm dating y/n!" yoongi gasps, "our business is finished! we have no more- we're out of business, lisa!"
"oh, c'mon." lisa raises a brow, clearly unimpressed with his reaction, "it's not going to hurt anyone to keep me as your sexy little secret- it's perfect! i only come into town, like, once or twice a year, so she won't even suspect anythi-"
"what are you- are you insane?! i'm not going to cheat on y/n-" yoongi chokes before raising his hands in defence, "lisa, you're a very beautiful woman and we do have a history, but- look, i'm sorry if i sent you mixed signals this week, that was certainly not my intention- please understand that i am very much not trying to cheat on someone who i love very much and who i'm pretty sure loves me back, so-"
"then who's that person she's so obviously flirting with right now?" lisa points over his shoulder, "also, she's barely visited you this week. what kind of girlfriend doesn't want to always be with her boyfriend??"
"first of all, space can be healthy, and second of all, she- hold on, you said flirting?" yoongi turns to look over his shoulder and out the door, tilting his head slightly when he sees you standing at the front of the garage laughing with... someone he certainly doesn't recognize...
"you can leave all of this behind and come and work for me, yoongi-" yoongi jumps when he suddenly feels hands grasping at the collar of his jumpsuit and he turns back to see lisa standing right in front of him (how did she move so quickly and quietly?!), "we can be happy together, i swear-"
"yeah, cool, just give me a second-" yoongi gently yanks lisa's hands off of him before hurrying out of the office and making a beeline right for you and this mysterious stranger
"oop- okay, he's coming this way-" baekhyun mutters, glancing over your shoulder before looking back at you, "it's show time. you ready?" he hums, reaching over to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear
"what do you think? do we look convincing?" you reach down to unbutton another button on your blouse before adjusting the collar
it's taking everything within you noT to whip around to see if yoongi's just walking towards you or if he's storming towards you... because there's definitely a difference and you definitely want it to be the latter
the plan you came up with had a pretty simple formula: one handsome stranger + one flirty, oblivious y/n = one jealous yoongi
jungkook had a point about how nice it'd be to get yoongi all riled up and possessive and frankly you think you deserve it considering how dismissive he's been with you all week... which is why you were more than happy to recruit your very handsome friend baekhyun (he's very sweet / you met last semester in one of your history courses / he was more than willing to help out with your plan because he's a theatre major and this is good practice for him) to help you out with your plan!
"you're laughing like a robot." baekhyun lowers his voice, "i told you to act natural-"
"i'm being natural! ha, ha! ha! ha-ha. you're so funny, baek-" you giggle obnoxiously, reaching over to slap his chest gently, "you are absolutely the funniest person i've ever met-"
"y/n!" yoongi clears his throat loudly and you bite back a grin at the hint of annoyance you can detect in his voice, "i... thought i was picking you up from class today? i wasn't aware you hired a chauffeur!"
"oh, yoongi!" you spin around, feigning surprise as if you totally weren't expecting to see him at all, "oh, this is actually my friend- i know you've been busy so he offered to give me a ride!" you hum, stepping aside to let baekhyun step up onto the sidewalk, "baekhyun, this is yoongi-" you gesture to yoongi, "yoongi, this is baekhyun! ...my boyfriend."
you're hoping your accidental on-purpose flub-up triggers yoongi's memory of how he accidentally introduced lisa to you as his girlfriend and you're delighted to see the way yoongi's jaw drops slightly, "oh, my bad! i'm sorry, i don't know how that happened- what i meant to say was baekhyun, this is yoongi, my boyfriend. there we go."
"baekhyun..." yoongi repeats, his eyes narrowing slightly when baekhyun suddenly wraps an arm around your shoulder and gives you a squeeze "well, that's very nice of you to drive y/n all the way here. thanks for doing that, man."
"oh, it's no problem at all!" baekhyun hums, reaching over to pinch your cheek, "y/n's the sweetest and i didn't want to abandon her on campus-"
"okay, she wasn't abandoned, i was literally about to leave to pick her up-" yoongi points out, lifting his keys with a jingle before abruptly shoving them into his back pocket, "you know, y/n's never mentioned a baekhyun before. you two seem... close!"
"oh, baek and i go way back." you snort, digging your elbow into his side with a grin, "isn't that right, baek?"
baek
yoongi pokes his tongue against the inside of his cheek at the fact that baekhyun still has his arm wrapped around your shoulder and you haven't made a move to shoVE it off
how can you not see that his intentions with you aren't just chummy??
he wouldn't have driven you all the way here if he didn't want to get his grubby hands under your skirt-
"we most certainly do! we made some great memories in that lecture hall- i have to say, i was, uh, pretty disappointed when i found out she was already in a relationship..." baekhyun sighs dramatically, shaking his head before looking back at you, "i would treat you right and never cancel dinner plans with you-"
"okay, i think it's time for you to go, bacon-" yoongi forces a smile on his face before reaching over to gently pull you towards him, "thank you for dropping my girlfriend off. have a good one."
"oh, no problem!" baekhyun points towards you, "hey, lemme know if you need a ride to campus on monday because i'd be happy to swing by your apartment and-"
"no, i can take her!" yoongi manoeuvres you so that you're standing behind him and basically blocked from baekhyun's sight, "i've got it from here, thanks."
"bye, baek!" you wave at baekhyun as gets into his car and he salutes at you before his right eye drops in a cheeky wink and it's at that point that yoongi really thinks he's about to lose it
what the hell was that?!
he spins around to face you as soon as baekhyun zooms off and you keep yourself from asking him why his ears have suddenly turned super red
"why are you wearing lowbuttons to class?" yoongi crosses his arms over his chest, "i thought you said you were going to use them as, like, apartment decoration."
"louboutins, yoongi." you correct, looking down at your slick stilettos, "and why can't i wear louboutins to class?"
"you wore them out to dinner one time and i ended up having to carry you back to the car because your feet were aching-" yoongi reminds you with a pointed tone, "are you telling me that you walked up and down and all around campus in those things?"
"maybe i did." you shrug, turning to stick your nose up in the air a little, "i can wear stilettos to class if i so please."
"and the miniskirt?"
"what, you don't like it?" you pout, reaching down to pick a piece of fluff off the surface, "it's new!"
it's a plain black skirt but it has a little slit on the side and you purposely bought this specific piece knowing that yoongi has expressed how much he likes you in black
"of course i like it, and obviously i'm a big fan of the heels but-" yoongi huffs, "all i'm saying is that it's a little odd- the timing is weird for your miniskirts and heels to make a sudden comeback now that you're all buddy-buddy with this backyawn-"
"it's baekhyun-"
"that's what i said!"
"you know, i don't know what you're implying here but i haven't done anything wrong-" you shrug, "are you feeling okay? maybe you need to take a nap-"
"stop being stubborn, y/n. just tell me what's going on!"
"nothing's going on!" you insist, raising your hands in defense before flicking a strand of hair over your shoulder, "everything is perfectly fine and nothing is-"
"are you leaving me for baekhyun?" yoongi interrupts, his eyes suddenly softening, "because if this is how you're telling me we're over, it's a pretty shitty-"
"what- what?? no!" you shake your head quickly, "no, of course i'm not- why would you even- okay, fine! fine, i-" you let out a breath and your shoulders drop a little, "it's just that... i don't know, it kind of feels like i've been fighting to get your attention for the whole week and i... i feel like i shouldn't have to do that as your girlfriend, you know? and i'm not... i guess i just felt like i wasn't stacking up to lisa and how cool and smart she is and- this whole week it's just felt like you're in a relationship with lisa and not me, so i... wanted to make you jealous to see if you still cared. or whatever."
"are you serious?" yoongi's eyes flutter shut and he reaches up to pinch the bridge of his nose in frustration, "fuck, i'm sorry, ah- i'm sorry, y/n, i really am-" his brows knit together in remorse as he looks at you, "i think i just got swept up in all the new clients she was bringing in so i was focusing more on that than on noticing what was going on with you... i'm sorry. why didn't you just come and talk to me about it?"
"i didn't know how." you mutter, reaching up to scratch the side of your head, "i've never had to deal with something like this before, so... i know it was silly of me to come up with this whole thing-"
"you are my girlfriend, y/n." yoongi reminds you, his voice softening, "not lisa. it's you." he reaches over to hook a finger under your chin so he can get you to look at him, "i promise i only have eyes for you, pretty girl. you still love me?"
"god, yoongi-" you feel your cheeks flush at the nickname and you roll your eyes playfully before turning your head, "yeah. duh."
"oh, you silly thing..." he tuts, pulling you in for a hug and propping his chin up on the top of your head, "i'm sorry, baby. i really didn't mean to make you feel like that..." he pulls away and reaches down to glide his finger down the bridge of your nose before poking the tip, "i hope you can forgive me for being a shitty boyfriend."
"i'll forgive you if you forgive me for pretending to flirt with someone else." you smile sheepishly, yoongi grinning before nodding in agreement
"deal." he wraps an arm around your shoulder as the two of you head back towards the direction of the office, "so you really went through all that trouble just to make me a little jealous?" yoongi grins, "just for a little bit of attention? as if i'm not already all over you when we're alone-"
"well, it worked, didn't it?" you take your bottom lip in between your teeth as you squish your cheek against yoongi's shoulder and look up at him, "my acting skills are not half bad, if i do say so myself-"
"oh, shit, uh-" yoongi suddenly stops in his tracks when he sees lisa step out of the office and he spins around so that his back is facing her, "not to make you worry, but you should probably know that lisa's somehow convinced that i've been secretly flirting with her all week because i want to become friends with benefits again and she almost, like, body-slammed me in the office- also, if namjoon asks, tell him a raccoon snuck in and that's why his desk is a mess and his pens are all over the floor-"
"wait, what?!" your brows knit together and you're about to lean over to look at lisa but yoongi quickly reaches out and grabs onto your shoulders to keep you in place
"-yeah, so i'm going to lay you down on the hood of that car now because doing something extreme is probably the only thing that'll prove to her that she's wrong and i am very desperate to show her that she's wrong-"
"lay me down on the- and do what?! yoongi-!" you don't get much of a chance to say anything else before yoongi's suddenly bending down to pick you up off the ground in one swift movement, his fingers digging underneath your thighs as he lays you down on the hood of the nearest car, "yoongi-! you can't just-"
"shush!" yoongi hisses, pressing his lips against yours to shut you up promptly
"mmvph-"
it doesn't take you very long to melt into the kiss once you realize you haven't kissed yoongi like this in like a week and a half and you can't help but smile at the familiar faint taste of cherry you're getting from him
yoongi's warm hand slides down from your waist so he can hitch your left leg up against his hip, one of your heels slipping from your foot and clattering onto the floor
your senses are so clouded with yoongi cherry yoongi cherry that you nearly forget the two of you aren't alone (and also, all of this is definitely being recorded on the security cameras right now)
"hey, so- i- i'm gonna get going-" lisa announces loudly as she stands at a good distance away from the two of you, her eyes looking up towards the ceiling so that she doesn't have to watch the way yoongi's kissing down your neck, "i have to check out of my hotel, so-"
"yeah, sounds good!" yoongi pulls away for a second and shoots a quick thumbs up over his shoulder, "see you later, pal!"
"bye, lisa!" you chime in, giving her a wave even though she isn't looking at you and is really trying to double-time it to her car, "it was so nice meeting you!"
the two of you watch silently as lisa practically leaps into her mustang, the sound of the engine revving before she quickly speeds off like she just remembered she left the oven on at home
you turn your head to look up at yoongi before scoffing lightly, hooking a finger against his chain to pull him back down towards you, "you're ridiculous, you know that?"
"yeah, i know-" yoongi's nose crinkles before he offers you a boyish smirk and a half-hearted shrug, "you love it, though."
🎙️help me help you make your wishes come true (send me a request!) ✨why don’t you explore the rest of the library while you’re here? (full fics!) 💫or perhaps you want something shorter to read? (drabbles like this one!) 🌟or something even shorter? (teeny tidbits!)
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meekmedea · 2 years ago
Text
Lex Luthor
“Kon, you left her alone with Luthor?! Of all people, you thought he was the best choice?” Tim is on the verge of pulling his hair out. 
“Hey! What is that supposed to mean?” 
`
“Didn’t he unleash killer robots in Metropolis last week?”
“It wouldn’t be the first time. Besides, Dad is good with kids. ”
`
“Kon…” Tim stares pleadingly at his partner. “I love you so much, but Bruce is going to kill me.”
“Tim, I think you’re reading into this too much. It’s fine. And it’s not like Dad forced her into plans for world domination. He didn’t with me. Mercy assured me that she’d keep an eye out on them too.”
“I really hope you’re right.”
~~~
“Your youngest daughter is charming, you should bring her along to the next gala,” says Lex offhandedly mid-conversation. 
The glass in Bruce’s hands almost shatters from the shock. What? Since when?
“A bright child, you must be very proud of her.”
“Yes, yes,” he says dazedly. Did Medea acquire another supervillian as a tutor and neglect to tell him?
`
The conversation bounces in his mind and he passes through the rest of the gala in a daze. The drive back to Gotham goes by in a blur. 
“Medea. You know I love you very much, right?” he says, the moment he sees her back at the manor. 
She gives him a strange look. “Dad? Is everything alright?”
“And we’ve had conversations about not keeping secrets,” he continues. “You’d tell me if you acquired another tutor on your terms, right?”
Her cheeks flushed. “Well, there is something.”
“What happened?” He sits down next to her. "I promise I won't be mad.”
“Look, I know I didn’t do well on my last quiz, but I promise, I’ll do better on the next one,” she says earnestly. “Tim’s been helping me already.”
“Wait what? No, I meant Lex Luthor.”
A puzzled look appears on her face. “What about Lex? Why would he be tutoring me?”
This time it’s his turn to be flustered. “Well…I…” He flounders for words. “Nevermind that, but why does Lex Luthor think you’re so charming? I wasn’t aware you had met.”
`
“Oh. He sort of babysat me a few times.”
“What? When?” His eyebrows go higher and higher as Medea lists the various times. All which corresponded to Justice League emergencies or ones for the Titans. “And he hasn’t–” he trails off weakly. 
She shook her head. “He’s quite nice.”
`
Lex Luthor, nice. They don’t really belong together.  Bruce doesn’t voice that out loud, instead, he says, “Really?”
“Yeah.” As if unsure what to say at the silence between them, she adds, “Did you know he wanted to run for president?”
“I don’t think he’d be a good fit.”
Medea hummed in approval. “I know, I told him the same. He’s nice and all that, but it doesn’t really seem like he’s a good fit. Personally, I think Ms. Talia could do the best job.”
`
“I could see that.” And he did. Talia had always a knack for managing and directing things. 
“Lex thinks so too.”
~~~~
It seems harmless and after a visit or two as Batman, Bruce gets enough reassurance that Lex has no dastardly plans to harm Medea or to involve her in his plans. 
For such a ruthless businessman, he seemed the opposite when dealing with children. Bruce supposed that everyone had their sides that they hid away from work. 
`
So he didn’t think too much of it. And he does bring Medea along to the next gala that Lex attends.
There may have also been a precedent with Wilson. Loathe as he is to say it, he thinks he can imagine Talia’s voice if she caught wind of him not allowing either to interact. “You’re burning bridges, Beloved.”
`
Though he wonders if he should have kept a closer eye on Lex when Medea corrects him. “That’s only phase one,” she mutters, passing the gauze to Alfred. “The other parts get a lot better.”
The others exchanged a glance – confused, puzzled and shocked.
“Medea?” he says carefully. “What do you mean just phase one?” He took back everything he thought about Luthor not involving her in his plans for world domination.
She glanced up to send him a look that seemed to ask why he didn’t understand. “Because it is?”
“Please explain.”
`
What follows was a plan so convoluted that only Lex could have come up with it. Bruce doesn’t know whether to cry or laugh at the fact that Medea is able to follow along. 
It almost makes….makes Luthor sound like a hero of sorts. An anti-hero perhaps. 
`
“So you’re telling me that he has all these evil plans…that will end with city destruction,” says Stephanie slowly. 
Medea nodded. 
“The places destroyed are deep in corruption.”
“Yep.”
“And because his confrontations with Clark always end with destruction, the city is forced to look into the matter and start anew.”
“Exactly. It’s like…” Her eyebrows furrowed together as she tried to think of the word. Medea snaps her finger when it comes to her. “Like charity work. Yes, that’s what he said.”
`
“Charity work,” echoes Tim in astonishment. “Charity work.”
“Is it bad that I kind of support this?” says Stephanie. “Bruce, why don’t you do this?”
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the-iceni-bitch · 3 years ago
Text
The Days and Nights are Long
Pairing: clueless!Colin Shea x clueless!fem Reader
Words: ~4K
Summary: You and Colin are being idiots and it’s driving his band crazy.
Warnings: explicit language, explicit sexual content (m receiving oral sex, unprotected vaginal sex, multiple orgasms, squirting), idiots in love, SMUT!!! 18+ ONLY!!!
A/N: It took way longer than I had planned but here’s some more of our drunk, musical idiots in love for you hoes!!! I love them so, even though they’re morons. Tagging my Colin babes @starlightcrystalline and @wayward-blonde because I know they’ve been waiting for this.
I no longer do taglists so if you want to stay up to date on all the latest filth, follow my sideblog @the-iceni-library and turn on notifications!
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Colin shook his head and shrugged uncomfortably as he stared at his phone, wracking his brain to think of what exactly he should say to you.
“For fuck’s sake, Shea, just ask her to come up.” Matt looked exasperated, twirling his stick through his fingers as he rolled his eyes when Colin scowled at him.
He’d been moping for the past two weeks, ever since the two of you had slept together. All of his bandmates were getting sick of it, the man was the biggest pouty baby on the face of the planet. If they had to listen to him sing Everybody Hurts one more time they were going to kill him.
So they’d come up with a little plan to get him out of his funk, lining up a gig that would really lend itself better to a female vocalist and feigning innocence when Colin pointed that out. They had really enjoyed hanging out with you on that exceptionally hot evening, and if having you join them again was the only way to get their boy out of his funk, even better. He had actually smiled before pulling his phone out, but then he realized he had no idea what he should say.
The two of you had still been cordial whenever you ran into each other, but there was definitely a strain to your interactions now. No matter how much you both told each other it wasn’t awkward, it was definitely awkward. It was also weird that he was pretty sure you hadn’t come home after 1 AM at all in the last two weeks, and you usually at least spent your weekend nights at some other asshole’s apartment. Not that he’d had any visitors either, but he didn’t want to explore that too much.
He was still staring at his phone screen and trying to come up when some nonchalant greeting that would entice you to come sing with them when the phone was suddenly plucked out of his hand by an exasperated looking Keith, who ignored his spluttering as he typed a quick message before tossing the phone back to him.
“You’re thinking about this too hard.” The bassist said, setting to tuning his instrument and chuckling at the indignant look on Colin’s face.
Colin was about to give a snarky reply when he felt his phone buzz and looked down to see a text from you, grinning when he saw you saying you’d be right up. With an exclamation point! He didn’t even notice the pleased grins his bandmates were giving each other as they watched him start to tune his guitar, plucking a happy little tune and humming to himself.
They were all expecting you to come through the main door from the stairs, so when you shouted hello from behind them after climbing up your fire escape, you were greeted with the sight of five grown men almost jumping out of their skins before turning to greet you.
That grin on your face was enough to make Colin melt, all the awkwardness that had been lingering between you disappearing in an instant when you met each other’s eyes.
“Alright boys!” You took the mic Brad handed you with a warm smile, rolling it in one hand as you trailed the cord through your fingers. “You said you needed my help with something Col, what’s up?”
“Right, these idiots lined up a gig for us without consulting me first.” They all avoided his halfhearted glare with doe eyed innocence, focusing on their instruments. “And, well, the set list isn’t really in my range.”
“Lemme see.” You took the sheet of paper from his hand and scanned it quickly. “That’s a whole lot of girl rock.”
“Yeah, like I said, Ann Wilson and I aren’t really in the same register.” Fuck, it was nice to be able to talk to you again.
“Why don’t you just modulate it, then?” You mumbled absentmindedly.
He gaped like a fish at that question. He honestly hadn’t even thought about it, and even if he had, he wasn’t expecting you to know about modulation.
“If we modulate for him, none of us can hit the harmonies.” Craig piped up from behind the keyboards, and he could have kissed him.
“That right?” You teased, shooting a wicked smirk around at them. “You boys sure you didn’t just miss me?”
Colin tried not to sound too hysterical when he let out a laugh, missing the indulgent eye rolls his band mates were giving behind your backs.
“What do you think, we booked a gig where I can’t sing any of the songs on purpose just so we could hang out again?” Good thing he was pretty, the man was clueless.
“No, you’re not that clever, Col.” He made a mock wounded gesture and you grinned at him, looking over the set list some more. “What kind of gig is this anyway?”
“Yeah, Craig, you never told us what the actual gig was.” Colin and the rest of the band gave the keyboardist a variety of inquisitive stares.
“Uh, it’s a bachelorette party.” He mumbled, avoiding making eye contact with his bandmates when they started groaning.
“Fuck, Craig! I do not want to get felt up by a bunch of drunk, horny women!” Colin threw a balled up sheet of music at you when you started laughing.
“That seems right up your alley, Shea.” You teased, dodging when he threw a pillow from the couch at you. “You don’t want to pick up some rowdy bridesmaid?”
“No, they’re scary aggressive.” He shuddered when he thought about the last bachelorette party they had done, they’d practically ripped the band’s clothes off before they could get out of there.
“Aww, well I’ll be there to shield you this time, sweetie.” You winked at him and moved a little closer to everyone. “Let’s practice, boys. Don’t want to give those girls cause to complain.”
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It was the day of the gig, and you and Colin had decided to drive together to streamline things. He was waiting in your living room and tapping his foot nervously as he waited for you to finish getting ready, anxious about what actually performing with you would be like.
“Y/N, we need to go!” He never thought you would be the type to take forever getting ready.
“Yeah, I know!” You strolled out to the living room with a grin on your face and he had to swallow a groan. “How do I look?”
“Good, really good.” The way he was looking at you made your grin grow even wider.
The outfit wasn’t even that special, just a denim mini skirt and a tight v-neck tee with a leather jacket. Oh, and thigh high leather boots. It was definitely the boots he was staring at, his eyes trained on the few inches of bare skin between the top of the boots and the hem of your skirt. You gave him a couple minutes to just stare at you before rolling your eyes and strolling towards your front door, grabbing him by his shirt and pulling him after you.
“C’mon Shea, we don’t wanna be late.” You scolded, shoving his amp into his hand and slinging his guitar case over your shoulder before heading down the stairs.
He had trouble focusing on the road as he drove you to the bar the party was going to be at, all he wanted to do was memorize the way you looked in that outfit. It was like someone told you exactly what to wear to drive him crazy. Maybe bringing you into this gig hadn’t been the best idea, because all he wanted to do right now was pull over and let you ride him while you weren’t wearing anything except for those boots and that jacket, and maybe whatever lingerie you had on under that outfit.
“Colin, you’re going to miss the turn.” Your voice snapped him out of his little daydream, and he cursed as he took the turn towards the bar a little faster than he would have liked.
“Sorry, just got a little distracted.” He mumbled, slowing down as he turned into the alley behind the bar and put the car in park behind Matt’s van.
The rest of the band was already unloading, waving at you two as Colin shut off his vehicle and you stepped out. You actually gave Craig and Keith little side hugs before you started helping with the unloading, he hadn’t realized you guys had gotten that close over the past week, and for some reason it made him smile.
“How’s it going man?” He didn’t know how he felt about the look Matt was giving him as he helped carry the bass drum inside, it felt suggestive of something. “Y/N seems excited to be here.”
“Yeah, I thought she might be nervous about performing but she’s handling everything like a pro.” He watched you laugh at something Brad said as you worked on connecting your mic. “Maybe we should make her an official member.”
“Whatever you say, man.” Matt just shrugged, laughing when Colin rounded on him and started spluttering.
“I was joking! We can’t just ask Y/N to be in the band!” Could they? Having you around had been a lot of fun, and the band dynamic had helped alleviate some of the tension that had been growing between you two. But seeing you tonight looking like you did and knowing that you were gonna have to have some on stage chemistry to make this work was making him think twice about things. You got a little intense during rehearsals, and the added pressure of being on stage might make him combust if you kicked it up at all.
Matt shook his head at him and set to assembling his kit while the rest of the band started tuning and connecting their instruments. You just sat on a stool and sipped some water, running through a couple vocal exercises absentmindedly as you scrolled through your phone. It only took a couple of minutes for everyone to finish setting up and then it was mic checks all around.
Everything sounded good and balanced after a couple adjustments and the sound guys gave you the thumbs up to start warming up. Colin couldn’t stop watching you. You were so unbelievably relaxed on stage and it was just endearing you to him even more. He thought for sure you would have been a bundle of nerves but you seemed to be right in your element, tossing him a couple of lazy grins over your shoulder as you ran through a couple of songs before the partygoers started filtering in.
The band switched to doing some instrumental ambience shit while they waited for the party to really get going, and Colin wandered over to talk to you when you took a step back from your mic.
“Still feeling ok about this?” He asked, beaming back at the soft smile you gave him.
“Yeah, I’m excited.” You bounced on your toes a little, adrenaline flooding your veins as the crowd grew. “Think I’ll get any bras thrown at me?”
“You never know with bachelorettes.” He laughed, strolling back over to his own mic so he could introduce the band.
If he thought jamming with you was special, it was nothing compared to watching you perform. You were a goddamn natural, coming alive and feeding off the crowd’s energy until you were completely lost in the music. Every time his eyes met yours you were grinning at him, and your chemistry with the rest of the band was palpable.
Not to mention, you kept drifting close to him on the stage, brushing your hand over his shoulders or leaning against him when you harmonized and it was making his knees weak. , God, he could do this with you every night, even though he was pretty sure he was going to need to sneak into the bathroom to jerk off afterwards.
The show was over too soon, the extremely drunken crowd of rowdy bachelorettes finally getting crazy enough that the band was ready to make a hasty escape. You were bouncing on your toes with residual energy as you started helping the guys pack up their instruments, grabbing Colin’s amp after he shoved his guitar in the case and you both made a run for it to his car when a wobbly woman started to try to climb on the stage.
“Colin, holy fuck that was so much fun!” You managed to make it to the alley unscathed and were giving him the most heartbreaking grin. “We’re definitely doing this again.”
“Yeah? Well you did a great fucking job.” Goddamn it, he’d missed you. “We can do whatever you want, honey.”
“Really?” You slammed the trunk closed and started to prowl closer to him. “Whatever I want?”
“That is what I said.” He could feel his voice dropping into that low register that meant he was in desperate need of some sort of release, so he really hoped he wasn’t misreading this situation. “Why? Did you want something now?”
“I think I do.” Your chest was right against his and you could feel it heaving, gazing at him through your lashes while you ran your fingers over his abs. “I stole the keys to the van.”
“And, you wanna go on a joy ride?” He breathed deep when you brushed your lips over his, winding an arm around your waist and pulling you close.
“Or, we could just fuck in the back while the rest of the guys search for these.” You pulled back a little and jingled the keys in his face, sucking your bottom lip between your teeth while he ran his hands over your hips.
“Yeah, that’s a great idea.” He smashed his lips to yours and let out a low moan, his fingers digging into your ass while the two of you stumbled towards the side door of the van.
You fumbled with the keys for a minute because you didn’t want to take your mouth off Colin for any reason, but then you were sliding the door open and the two of you were falling inside in a tangle of limbs before somehow managing to kick the door closed behind you. Trying to undress each other was a little difficult with how wrapped up you were in each other but you managed, tossing your garments away haphazardly as your tongues curled tangled together. Colin grabbed your hands when you went to remove your boots, pulling them up to his face and kissing your palms before winding your arms around his neck.
“Keep those on.” His voice was a low growl and fuck, you forgot how sexy he was.
“Well, cannot say I’m surprised you're a little kinky, Col.” You wound your fingers through his hair and yanked, purring at the groan he gave you. “I’m gonna suck that pretty dick of yours, but then I’ll give it to you nice and rough.”
“God, baby.” He wished he didn’t sound so whiny when you started kissing your way down his chest, but he hadn’t gotten any release except from his hand for the past two weeks and he really needed you to keep doing what you were doing. “I’ll take whatever you give me.”
“Yeah? Knew you were a good boy.” You winked at him when you started kissing the skin above the band of his boxer briefs before you were yanking them down his thighs and immediately licking a heavy stripe up the underside of his cock when it sprung up against his abs.
Colin had to brace a hand against the side of the van when you worked him over, spitting on his tip and watching it drip down his length before spreading it over him with your lips. You wrapped your hand around his shaft and gave him a nice, smooth stroke as you ducked down between his length to press gentle kisses over his balls while you jerked him off. He almost choked on his tongue when you wrapped your lips around his sack and tugged softly, the hum you let out sending a vibration up his spine while your thumb swiped over his swollen tip.
The sounds he was making from just a handjob were enough to soak through the thin lace of your panties, and when he shouted your name when you moved a little lower and teased your tongue over his asshole, well you almost fucking came just from that. You couldn’t believe you had stupidly waited two fucking weeks before indulging in this man again, you finally felt like yourself again. It was driving you absolutely crazy, the way his hips were wriggling underneath you spurring you on until you couldn’t take it any more.
If he thought your hand was incredible, it was nothing compared to the feel of your lips wrapped around his tip while your tongue swirled around his sensitive head. With all the women he’d slept with, he’d definitely suffered through some mediocre and downright disappointing blow jobs. But you felt like you were about to suck the soul out of him, and you’d only just started.
“Ah, Christ.” He was going to pass out if you kept going like this, your mouth was like fucking heaven. “Honey, fuck.”
You shot him a wicked look when you started bobbing your head, taking him just a little deeper each time while your tongue curled around him as much as possible. Then you opened your throat and swallowed him whole and he lost his mind.
He wrapped his hand in your hair and held your head still as he started fucking your throat, his hips bucking wildly while you choked and sputtered around him. Drool was running down your chin and soaking his thighs as you started breathing through your nose, digging your fingers into his thighs while he used you like a fuck toy. You kept your tongue pressed flat against your bottom teeth to avoid choking on it, moaning softly when you tasted the salty tang of his precum hit your tongue. His grip on your hair was growing painful, and you could tell by the way his abs were twitching that he was close.
“Wait, ah shit!” He somehow managed to gather enough self control to pull out of your mouth, groaning at the long string of saliva that kept you connected even as you bit at your swollen lips. “I’m not coming unless it’s in that pretty pussy. How do you want it?”
“Fuck me from behind, Col.”
He growled as he sat up and smashed his lips to yours, savoring the taste of himself on your tongue before flipping your over and burying his face in your hair. You let out a low moan when he slammed into you with no warning, gasping at the punishing pace he was setting and purring when he started mouthing at your neck.
The van was shaking like some sort of cliche while Colin fucked into you with abandon, his hips bouncing off your ass in an obscene display while the two of you whined and panted together. Colin was going to lose his fucking mind, two weeks with barely even talking to you and now he was finally inside you it was all he could do to not go completely feral.
“Oh god, honey.” He was practically whining against your skin when you clenched around him, sucking your ear lobe between his lips while you arched your back and purred for him. “Fuck, you’re so tight and wet. Pussy so fucking good. Tell me you’re close, I need to feel you come.”
“So close, Colin, shit!” You gasped when he hit you deep, curling your body backwards around him and reaching over your shoulder to wind your fingers through his hair and press his lips to yours. “Need that dick so bad. Feel so good when you’re inside me.”
“I know, baby, I know.” He wound one hand around your neck and the other arm around your waist, holding you close while he kissed you deeply and swallowed your wanton mewls with a deep groan. “Come for me.”
His hips ground against you and you slapped the floor of the van when you came, sobbing into his mouth and vibrating underneath him while your pussy strangled his cock. Your teeth nipped at his lips once you were finished, humming happily as he continued fucking you through your high.
“Need more, Colin.” You whimpered when he started slowing down, trying to thrust your hips back towards him as you tried to bring yourself to the edge again. “Harder, I need it.”
“Fuck, I’ll give you whatever you fucking want.” He tugged at your lips with his teeth, squeezing your neck gently and groaning at your soft whimper as you clenched around him. “Jesus Christ, you feel so fucking good.”
You couldn’t respond when he started pounding into you furiously, the way his cock was punching against your soft walls making it a little hard to breathe, never mind thinking. He was hitting every spot you needed him to with each thrust, grunting into your ear each time his hips slammed into you until he felt your breath hitch.
Every time he bottomed out you thought you were going to pass out, the tip of his cock punching against your cervix and making you see stars. It was so good, he was hitting you so deep and smooth you couldn’t believe you’d been denying yourself for so long.
Colin growled when a particularly vicious push had your entire body rising off the floor of the van, your fluttering sigh sending a shiver of pleasure through his body. One more thrust and you lost it, screaming with ecstasy as every muscle in your body vibrated and you squirted all over Colin’s thighs and the floor.
“Fuck, fuck, baby.” Colin was desperate, his rhythm completely gone as he chased his own end while you fluttered around him. “Gonna fill this pretty little pussy up until I’m leaking outta you for the next week.”
“Oh god, please.” Your eyes rolled up in your head while you let him use you, his lips tracing your jaw hungrily as you pushed your hips back to meet his. “Give it to me, Colin.”
He buried his face in your neck and let out a strangled cry when his hips stuttered, thick, warm ropes of white shooting against your soft walls until he was collapsing on top of you with a sated moan. You tangled your fingers with his above your head as your breathing regulated, his breath hot on your neck while the two of you melted into each other.
“We’re not waiting two weeks again, right?” Colin’s arms wrapped around you as he nuzzled into your hair, his lips spreading in a slow smile when he felt you purr contentedly.
“Nope. I’m definitely gonna need this to happen on the regular.” You turned a little so you could rub your nose against his. “You know, in between our other, normal escapades.”
“Right.” His heart fell a little at that, but maybe just interspersing his trysts with you with his other one night stands would help flush his crush on you out of his system.
Before he had a chance to say anything else there was a sudden pounding at the van door, snapping the two of you out of your haze with a pair of exasperated groans.
“Shea!!!” You untangled yourselves as you started to pull on your clothes. “That had better be Y/N in there! If you sad fucked some bachelorette and we have to listen to you sing stupid breakup songs for the next month I’m going to kill you!”
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writer-monster · 3 years ago
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11 reasons why cap 4 should reintroduce Bucky Barnes as the love interest, an essay
to start this off, i am not writing this essay from a shipping place nor do i believe that this would have any influence at all over the upcoming movie. i expect nothing. this is simply something that i would personally like to see. (of course no hate to anybody who thinks differently)
here are 11 reasons why i think making Bucky into Sam Wilson's love interest in Cap 4 would be a good move for Disney.
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1. on the Chinese film market - and why it's an irrelevant argument against the inclusion of homosexual themes in Cap 4
the Chinese film market is something that has been blamed for a lack of diversity in Hollywood films a lot lately. many people claim that this market with a lot of buying power has been responsible for the lack of gay and black representation in particular within Hollywood films.
and we have certainly seen Hollywood treating it as such, going so far as to cut gay scenes from movies for their Chinese releases, and vastly minimising John Boyega's (a black actor's) presence in the Chinese poster of Star Wars The Force Awakens.
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[image ID: on the left is an image of the American poster for Star Wars The Force Awakens, featuring John Boyega prominently on the right-hand side. And on the right is the Chinese poster for the same movie, in which John Boyega is barely visible.]
so we know at the very least that Disney believes this through their own actions and efforts to self-censor for the different markets.
but Captain America 4 is a black-led movie, don't you forget. and Disney can't minimise Sam Wilson/Anthony Mackie in the movie or the poster because it's his movie and his poster. and no amount of creativity in the editing room can change that (thank God!).
so if by their own argument the film is already going to be either banned, panned or slammed in China... then what do they have to fear from making it a gay movie too?
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2. oh, the queerbaiting
queerbaiting is an unusual cultural idea. and sometimes i find myself thinking that the term is far too easily used, but then all of a sudden i will stumble upon a movie or show that is so quintessentially cruel and overt in it's... well... queerbaiting that i will start to wonder what the hell kind of a bizarre relationship all these straight people seem to have with their friends. take Troy and Abed from Community or John and Sherlock from Sherlock as the perfect examples of this. (in which my reaction to the show's creators saying the show wasn't gay was to ask so then why did you make it so gay?!)
i felt that Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes in tfatws were getting quite close to this level of queerbaiting.
there was the field scene, the couple's counselling scene, the boat scene, the couple's counselling scene, Bucky going with Sam to face Karli when she told Sam to come alone, the couple's counselling scene, ALL the staring scenes, Sam checking out Bucky's ass here as they said goodbye, the "i would move in with him but" hidden scene, "Uncle Bucky" showing up at the cookout scene, the romantic walking off together into the sunset together ending scene, and the couple's counselling scene. did i forget anything? but i mean seriously, the couple's counselling scene!!! that thing they did with their legs and their crotches while staring deep into each other's eyes, would any straight guy willingly do that? do straight guys crotch-snuggle now?
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[image ID: an image of Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes during the therapy scene with the quote, "Isn't anybody going to drag me into impromptu couple's therapy and slot my legs firmly between theirs before staring deeply into my eyes?"]
(yeah i stole this image from a buzzfeed article on the fan reactions to the couple's therapy scene. but given that they stole 80% of the content of that article from fandom tumblr, i think it's pretty even-steven.)
there's also the fact that people started talking about bisexual Bucky Barnes a lot after the tiger pictures line, and the lead writer Malcom Spellman responded to the talk of Bucky's bisexuality with "just keep watching". well we watched, Malcolm. but it's beginning to feel like you were just jerking us around.
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3. the writing
seriously though, what else is Bucky Barnes doing right now in the MCU? his only remaining connection to anything going on right now is through Sam. there is literally nothing else established that's left for him to do that doesn't involve Sam. he moved to Louisiana to be closer to Sam (canonically), he hangs out with Sam's family (canonically), and Steve is presumably gone and is definitely not coming back for more adventures.
he has no villains or loose ends left. he has no other superheroes that he appears to be in contact with. he has no girlfriend or potential love interest, or even other friends or family. he is living in a tent that he has secretly set up in Sam's backyard and is mysteriously appearing from the bushes when it's time for dinner like a stray cat.
in my opinion there is no other meaningful and pre-established progression for Bucky's character that wouldn't just feel cheap.
plus, i don't think the general audience would be all that surprised if they kissed. i think a LOT of people picked up on all that tension. i think a lot of straight people picked up on all that tension too.
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4. the chemistry between the actors & the chemistry between the characters
the original pitch for tfatws was essentially just this, it was the chemistry between Sebastian Stan and Anthony Mackie and their respective MCU characters of Bucky Barnes and Sam Wilson.
now obviously Anthony and Sebastian are simply friends, and i wouldn't mean to imply anything more. but they are also not their characters.
Sam and Bucky's scenes together before tfatws were both limited and short, and yet audiences still fell in love with the dynamic between the two characters.
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in interviews, these two actors are constantly slipping into character and flirting with each other and frankly it's adorable. plus it's really entertaining. i'd love to see that dynamic, unfiltered, in a movie.
because believe it or not the flirting is actually even more open in their interviews than it was in tfatws. and i'm leaving some links as proof.
this here is known as the "married" compilation
and here's a "lucky dip" selection of interviews - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5,
and here's Anthony trying to get Seb to take his jacket off.
i'm just saying, why not let their chemistry shine? these two are so talented and so entertaining, especially when you put them in a room together. and can you imagine how absolutely hilarious and brilliant it would be to watch them navigate being a couple?
(and for those who bring up the "friends would be uncomfortable pretending to be dating" argument, i'm not here asking for a sex scene or anything. i don't think anyone would expect them to show any more intimacy (physical or emotional) while playing a couple than what they've already shown together in say... tfatws or in their own interviews. not that i actually expect anything regardless.)
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5. if they were a man and a woman they would've gotten together in tfatws
i have no more to add here. just that... yeah, they would've.
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6. and i'm not talking about the comics here, i'm talking about the MCU.
i understand fully that none of what i'm saying here falls in line with these characters from the comics. but the mcu itself doesn't fall much in line with the comics either, and these two characters especially are very different from their comics counterparts.
i'm not asking for these two to get together in the comics. tbh i don't think that it would work.
but the mcu Sam and Bucky are different and closer than their comics counterparts. they've got different histories, different backstories, and a very different dynamic. please rest assured that i am only talking about them in the mcu.
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7. Bucky Barnes is believably bisexual. and Sam Wilson has never been proven to be straight in the mcu, nor has he had a love interest.
(now please continue to keep in mind that these points only stand for the mcu versions of Bucky Barnes and Sam Wilson, and not at all for their comics counterparts.)
Sam Wilson has never had a love interest, which is crazy because have you seen that man! he has had two blink and you'll miss it moments of verbal expression of attraction to women, both in TWS. and that's the extent of it, through his entire history in the mcu.
Bucky Barnes has had a number of surface-level female love interests, but none of them even came close to the level of connection and chemistry that Bucky shares with Sam.
and i'm sorry SarahBucky fans, but i just don't think there's very much to their relationship either. i love Sarah, i really do. but it's Sam who shares all the meaningful moments and history and chemistry with Bucky. and i don't see what making her into a love interest would do for Sarah's character either, what would that add to her story?
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[Picture ID: Bucky at the cookout with Sam, Sarah, Cass and AJ. Bucky and Sam are looking at each other and smiling.]
and also there is the whole tiger pictures thing... again. which does strongly suggest that Bucky is bisexual whether this was intentional on behalf of the writers or not.
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8. it's representation... AND it feels natural
marvel hasn't had a lot of queer representation that's been noticeably present in the MCU at the time of writing this.
there have been a lot of failures so far, from the bisexual erasure of Valkyrie in Thor Ragnarok to the wlw erasure in Black Panther.
there was queerbaiting almost identical to the bisexual Bucky baiting for Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2. when asked if he had considered featuring a gay hero in gotg2, director James Gunn stated that "We might have already done that. I say, watch the movie." after the movie's release audiences were understandably confused about the lack of queer representation. To which the director followed up his comments with, "But we don't really know who's gay and who's not. It could be any of them."
there is also Loki, considered by most fans after the airing of his six episode series on Disney+ to be both a poor attempt at both genderfluid representation and bisexual representation. with both attempts being summed up fairly well by the term "blink-and-you'll-miss-it". (also it's just terribly written and Loki doesn't wear any interesting clothes! fanficcers are a Goddamn blessing in this hard time!)
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and let us not forget that Andrew Garfield was apparently FIRED for pushing for a bisexual spiderman. a bisexual spiderman within an interracial mlm relationship no less.
so for all these failures, marvel, why not allow us queer fans this? two brilliant and heroic men in a loving interracial relationship. two heroes that we can look up to.
now, one of the biggest detractions from the argument for representation is the idea of "forced diversity". and some poorly written characters certainly do end up feeling forced into the narrative. take Iceman in the comics for example, with Jean Grey just straight up suddenly telling him he's gay. like, marvel, sweetie, that's not how this works! and i don't know a lot of queer people who thought much of that "representation".
but the crux of the "forced diversity" argument is almost always that it feels unnatural within the story, right? and i don't think that anyone could say that about MCU Sam and Bucky ending up together, given these characters' existing chemistry and their history. they've both played characters in gay relationships before so we know that it's not outside of either actor's wheelhouse. and y'all know that Anthony and Seb can act, people. if it's in the script i believe that they'll make it seem like the most natural thing on earth.
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9. it'd be a nice change
there's been an ongoing meme lately about "Disney's first gay character", the joke being that they continually announce gay characters without really ever including gay characters in their films.
this is to the point where Disney has formed a reputation amongst queer audiences of being homophobic.
if Sam and Bucky were to become a couple, then Disney could have its first actual gay character within a gay relationship. AND have him be in the lead of his own movie, no less.
it's also worth keeping in mind that there's likely an overlap between the people who were outraged by a Sam Wilson Captain America, and the people who'd be outraged by a gay Captain America. and if they were already not seeing the film, then i don't think much is gonna change that.
queer audiences would definitely love it, and the media attention would be guaranteed to be huge. i mean, simply look at the amount of media attention mere rumours of a character's queerness gets you and multiply that by a canon confirmation of said rumours.
but i'm pretty sure that Disney already knows this.
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10. and yet, in truth, it's not about the representation
in truth i've never felt that i had any trouble relating to characters of any sexual orientation, race, gender, sex, body type, etc. (although that is not to throw any shade at all on people who do wish to see themselves represented) but for me, i think it's more about the story than the packaging.
and yet, a love story is still just a story. straight or queer, monoethnic or interracial. when two characters have chemistry and history and have sacrificed for each other time and time again, and they also can't keep their hands or their eyes off each other, then i'm pretty sure that that's a love story.
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straight or queer, monoethnic or interracial, it shouldn't be about these simple labels. it should be about how well written the relationship is. it should be about chemistry, and history, and sacrifice.
because i'm fucking sick of all the hollow, forced romances in media no matter the genders of the participants. i'm sick of lazily written, shallow relationships where any two people sharing the same space for any extended period of time will simply fall in love. it's boring, it's repetitive, and as a writer myself it drives me up the wall!
romance stories suck! and everyone knows that romance stories suck. between twilight, and most of the entire YA genre, and love triangles (so boring), and romance used as poorly-written throwaway subplots in Hollywood movies, the world is in agreement that the romance in western media is simply dreadful. and yet we still want love stories. it's an entire genre that sits at the heart of the human experience (<3), and yet one which so few of today's best known writers seem truly able to capture.
i don't think that i'm the only one who feels this way, either. i suspect it's actually a large part of why fandom is so romance-centred in the first place, that we're all just starving for a good love story.
(btw i think fandom has a reputation for being something that as a whole that it is not. it has this reputation for straight up demanding things and harassing people until they get their way. while unfortunately there are a few people who do this, they're fucking annoying and i swear that they're far from the majority.
in my experience fandom is mostly about writing a five thousand word story at three am while drunk off your ass because it might make someone whom you've never met smile, editing it in the cold light of day, and then posting it. expecting nothing. sometimes getting nothing. and sometimes getting someone send you kudos or a comment so heartbreakingly wonderful that it makes you smile in return.)
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11. so once again, it is all about the writing.
i want to see Sam and Bucky get together in the mcu, not because they would be a gay couple but because i genuinely believe that their story has potential to be an amazing love story.
and i know the mcu isn't about the romance. it's why in my personal opinion we haven't gotten a lot of good canon romances besides Peter Quill and Gamora. and i don't think that the mcu should be all about the romance either. i fucking love the action and the fighting scenes. i love the comedy. Captain America: The Winter Soldier had no romance and it was a fucking treasure, it was an amazing spy-action-thriller and it made my little gay heart dance. Thor Ragnarok had no romance, and it was an utterly brilliant comedic spectacle action film. not every movie needs romance.
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but mcu Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes were doing couple's therapy and fixing a boat and walking off into the sunset together in tfatws. they were inseparable on the battlefield. they've got a dynamic. it's beautiful, it's romantic, and it's gold.
a budding relationship between them in the next movie would be a good way to explore both characters more without the narrative feeling too stilted and separate. at the end of tfatws, both Sam and Bucky fans found that their respective fave felt somewhat underutilised and that their characters were underexplored.
now, that problem would be even more difficult to remedy in a movie, because the plotline of a movie needs to be really tight to work (giggity). and we know that the central conflict of the movie is gonna be action-based (which is good), but we still need each character's personal journey and growth to tie into the main conflict. (which is another issue that some fans found with tfatws, that these characters didn't really feel connected to the action-based plot on a more personal level.)
if Sam and Bucky are already in a relationship, however, this whole dynamic changes. first, their relationship has already been set up for nicely since TWS and through tfatws and they would officially be the best-fleshed-out couple in the mcu. but most importantly, a relationship gives them a perfect vehicle to explore both of their pasts comparatively and connect them personally to the action-based plot.
do you want to establish that Sam is a little too trusting and naïve? then establish this through his relationship with Bucky, and through showing his placing his trust in Bucky. (rather than through having him sympathise with a villain who threatened to murder his sister and his nephews).
perhaps you want to show Bucky recovering from his trauma? show us how comfortable he is with Sam. they get along, they're enjoying each other's presence, we see more of Sam's life and of his family, and then let Bucky tell Sam something that's raw and dark and honest about his life as The Winter Soldier. something about a memory, one that he only just recalled. he's opening up. and maybe what he tells Sam is even something that sets up the future action-based conflict, to ground that in something real.
you want to explore that Sam has trauma too? do this through Bucky. he tells Bucky a story about his time in the military. in the form of a flashback, he shares his own story of loss to evoke before the audience the shared theme of feeling at fault even when you're simply a helpless bystander to an act of pure destruction.
then, action sequence! and it's directly connected to Bucky's time as the Winter Soldier. explore the grief of someone whose life the Winter Soldier tore apart manifesting into a villain perpetuating the cycle of pain. establish your villain.
Later, Sam is dragged into battle against this villain for protecting Bucky. But Bucky doesn't want Sam to protect him. He feels guilt for what he can't control and he doesn't want Sam getting hurt because of him. Bucky reminds Sam that he has a family, one who needs him and who loves him. He tells him to go home.
Sam reminds Bucky that he's a part of that family. And that sure Sam's a hero and his job is to protect anyone and everyone, but that he's doing it because he wants to. It's not simply to prove that he can, or to prove that he's not a bystander (this connects to Sam's trauma here), but that he's doing it to help people.
and this gets Bucky thinking about who he is and what he's doing here. is he a hero who stands by Sam's side? or is he an ordinary man who stands aside? or perhaps, does he stand alone? what does he stand for? Maybe Sam knows. But does Bucky?
Sam and Bucky fight off the villain again, and for the first time Bucky meets this adversary face to face. And Bucky recognises this villain, and has a flashback to the genuine pain that he inflicted upon them in the form of the Winter Soldier. Bucky freezes mid-fight, he almost dies, and Sam has to save him.
Sam chews Bucky out for almost getting killed because he was afraid for him. but Bucky takes this the wrong way and goes off to fight the villain alone, or perhaps to die alone, he's not quite sure.
He puts up a half-hearted fight. He apologises for what the Winter Soldier has done, and he waits for the killing blow, when Sam swoops down and he saves him. He asks Sam why he saved him and Sam calls him a moron. And then, Sam asks him what sacrificing himself would solve. He tells him that you can't choose your past but you can choose your future (connecting to his own experience of loss and guilt and grief). And that no matter what Bucky Barnes still has a future, whether that's as the Winter Soldier or the White Wolf or just some dork with a day job. And that he has a future as a part of Sam's family too.
Sam fights the villain, and it's toe to toe. He delivers a few good blows, but receives a fair few himself. And then the villain tears off his wings, first one and then the other, in a manner reminiscent of what the Winter Soldier did to him in TWS. Through Bucky's eyes there's a flashback to highlight the parallels. Sam gets back on his feet and he fights his best fight, but is now losing.
And then the heavily injured Bucky steps up and fights by Sam's side, and only together do they take down the villain.
"So... I inspired you, huh?" Sam teases with a smile, utterly exhausted. "With my heroism and-"
"You inspired me." Bucky said, equally exhausted. "Let's leave it at that."
Together, Sam and Bucky go back to the safety and warmth of their family. Sam fixes his wings. Sam goes back to being Captain America. And Bucky... he's around, but it's unclear what he's doing.
That is, until the very end. When Sam is in a fight, and suddenly Bucky shows up and helps him out.
"What are you doing here?" Sam asks.
"I've made up my mind." Bucky says. "I'm the Winter Soldier. But now I'll save lives, Sam. Now, like you, I'll be a hero."
Sam smirks. "So does this make you my sidekick, then?"
Bucky smiles. "C'mon, at least make me a partner." He says.
"How about co-workers." Sam says (in flashback, he remembers back to the death of his last on-the-job partner).
"How about friends." Bucky says, with a wry look.
"Bucky... I don't want to see you put your dumbass self in danger." Sam says.
"Oh, and it's ok for you to go running off into danger on your own all the time?" Bucky asks.
"Yes." Sam says stubbornly. "Absolutely it is."
"Why?"
"Because I'm not a dumbass?!"
"Sam, if you think I'm not gonna be watching your back for the rest of time... then you're the biggest dumbass I know. And I don't care if you need me or not, I will be there for you."
"Because Sam, you're more than Captain America. You're more than a good soldier. You're a good man. And I think sometimes, the world forgets what the difference is."
-
...or something like that.
(i only spent like 15 minutes on that. you know if i were actually writing this movie i would come up with something much better. and if anyone from marvel is seeing this, yes i can come work for you. i will make the time, let's do this thing right!)
-
finale
at the end of the day, whether or not the mcu chooses to make Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes a couple, it's their decision. and they don't owe me anything.
i'm just some random person on the internet. who thinks that Captain America 4 should #givecaptainamericaaboyfriend
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itsybitsybookworm · 2 years ago
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I think it's interesting how Eric ended up as Cuddy in spite of his justified fear that he would turn out to be House 2.0, especially through the House and Cuddy as mirror images lens.
Yes! I have been thinking about this! Not just the job, Foreman's personality also resembles Cuddy which fits nicely into the mirror image factor of it all. Foreman's choice not to be involved in drama, the way he treats his employees and the way he treats House are so wonderfully similar to Cuddy. I guess, in her own way, Cuddy was also afraid of turning into House. Remember that episode where Cuddy's mom is trying to sue the hospital for mistreating her but it's later revealed that she was actually trying to push House and Cuddy together? She says something along the lines of 'who else will tolerate either of you?' That just goes to show how similar they really are. But their worldviews, mannerisms and most importantly their choices are what set them apart. Which is why I believe they're complements of each other.
Foreman shares many of House's beliefs that are unique to him yet his choices, his ambition bring him so much closer to Cuddy. Things are not puzzles to him, they are cases. The puzzle is House and, in extention, himself.
Remember that scene when Foreman is fired by the other hospital for not following procedure and Cuddy is rehiring him? She says that Foreman is too much like House for anyone else to employ him, the only one who will even consider it is the one who employed the original House. That is strikingly close to his views of himself. In the last season there's a scene where the investors say there's been a downgrade in the hospital due to the change in administration, Foreman counters that it's because House's department was closed for a year. But you can see in his face for a second where he considers that it might be true that he is at fault. There's more similarity in his responses in these scenes than is casually visible. I don't have it all worked out yet but I know there's something deeper.
Finally, my two favorite Foreman is replacing Cuddy moments-
When he gets some sport event tickets for House and himself. He says House doesn't have to be alone after Wilson's gone, he will still have people who care about him, he'll have friends. The entire series we see the two people who care most about House are Wilson and Cuddy. House says Foreman is trying to replace Wilson but that's not it. Foreman cannot replace Wilson even if he wanted, he just can't. Cuddy is the one he's replacing.
The one where he's asking Chase not to quit. Chase asks if he's there as the boss or as a friend. They talk and Chase says he's there as House, wanting to force him into a decision. Foreman says "we've both seen it work". Which is why Cuddy kept House around. As insufferable as he is, House is the best, he gets results. She kept him in line, made exceptions for him, etc. etc. Foreman does exactly that for Chase in this episode. This also fits into my theory that Chase is more like House than Foreman.
In conclusion, Foreman has more in common with Cuddy than House. At the very end, he becomes Cuddy, Chase becomes House and maybe (I don't have enough arguments to support this) Taub replaces Wilson.
This turned out a little too long, I hope it's coherent.
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trashywormeateroffics · 2 years ago
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The right universe.
Summary: After Y/N's life turns upside down, she's full of grief. Somehow, one day, she manages to travel to the MCU, where she meets her favorite characters, including a certain god who seems willing to establish a friendship with her. Suddenly she's enwrapped in this new world, where everything she loved in a screen is now reality. How will she react? Will she be able to deal with the ghosts that haunt her? Or will she let them consume her? Will she be open to accept the love she is offered? Read to find out!
Read this on AO3! 
Category: F/M.
Relationships: Loki/reader.
Characters: Wanda Maximoff, Pietro Maximoff, Sam Wilson (Marvel), James "Bucky" Barnes, Vision (Marvel), Tony Stark, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Stephen Strange, Nick Fury, Maria Hill, Bruce Banner, Thor (Marvel), Clint Barton, Steve Rogers, Peter Parker, other minor appearances of other characters but these are the main ones, Pepper Potts, Loki (Marvel).
Additional tags: Loki/reader - Freeform, Avenger Loki (Marvel), Loki & Tony Stark Friendship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Fluffyfest, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Pining a lot because we love to suffer, Domestic Avengers, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark is a parental figure, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Everyone is a good bro, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, y/n, After Infinity War but no one died and the purple bitch was defeated, Missions, Y/N is a universe traveller, Grief, Therapy, Protective Loki (Marvel), Loki in love.
MASTERLIST OF THE STORY
Chapter 35: Sigyn. 
It had been a few months since Loki and Y/N told everyone that they were together. They had grown closer, if that was even possible. She also had grown closer with the team, bonding on missions and in the day to day life activities. Tony had taken a while off of missions, since Pepper was almost seven months pregnant and he wanted to be with her. Y/N had mastered the art of doing magic, being able to do cool things now, not only the basics; cool things like making Thor fall asleep or creating an illusion of her with pink hair. Even though the sky breakers were not caught yet, and they heard that Sarah had not died, but was on the run, life was good. And normal. As normal as it can be when you are living with The Avengers. Until Strange showed up.
She was currently sitting on the couch with Loki, reading a book as the Original Six were hanging around there too.  
“There is a threat on Earth and it's been following you, Y/N.” He said as soon as he entered.  
“W-what do you mean?” She asked, beginning to feel terrified. She looked at Loki and he squeezed her hand to reassure her. And himself.
“Look,” he opened his hands ready to do his magic when Tony stopped him.
“Wait, what are you gonna do? Bring the threat here?” The sorcerer looked at him, serious.
“Yes.”
“I don't think that's a good idea.” Bruce said.
“The threat does not seem to want to hurt Y/N, they would have already done it. It's been happening for weeks now.”
“Excuse me, someone has been following her for weeks and you did not think to let us know?” Loki asked now, his anger bubbling up inside him.
“I thought it best to know the threats' true intentions before making you all worried for nothing. It could just be an admirer.”
“And what made you tell us now?” Y/N asked him.
“I know who it is.”
“Who is it?”
“It's better if you see for yourself.” He told her before moving his hands to use his magic. Suddenly, a portal opened and someone fell from it.
“Ouch!” The woman said.
“Tell us who you are.” Strange demanded. “And why you have been following Y/N.” The woman got up from the floor.
“I am Sigyn, from Asgard, Freyjadottir.” She answered, straightening up. “And who is Y/N?”
“I am,” Y/N said.
“You are not Y/N, you are Astrid from Asgard, Freyjadottir, and my sister.”
“WHAT?!” Everyone asked, except for Y/N, who just looked at her. Suddenly she burst out laughing. They all looked at her with confused expressions on their faces.
“Of course!” She exclaimed, still laughing. “My sister is freaking Sigyn of Asgard and I am the daughter of the Völva. Right. Makes sense.”
“I am telling the truth.” She said, almost offended.
“I'm not saying you are not, I'm just saying you have mistaken me for another person.”
“No, I have not. I can sense your magic, mother told me one day I would be able to recognize you by that alone.”
“Mother?” Y/N asked, a bit more seriously now.
“Yes, Freyja.”
“Where is she?”
“She's in Valhalla now…”
“How do I know you are telling the truth?” She asked, pursing her lips.
“You can have him enchant you and see into your memories, mother should have left at least one.” Sigyn said motioning to Loki.
“You know me?” He asked her.
“Well, of course. Mother used to tell me a lot about you and the royals.”
“Why don't I remember you?”
“I was vanished when you were a child.” She responded, her confidence wavering a bit.
“For what?” Strange asked her now.
“I will tell you all everything, but first I need Astrid to believe me.”
“Y/N.” She told her firmly. “My name is Y/N.”
“Right, of course.”
“Loki?” Y/N called him. “Do you… Can you do it?”
“I can darling but… I'm going to see everything, are you okay with that?” She thought for a moment. Every single memory she ever had, he was going to see. She had told him about her life before coming to this universe, but him seeing it was different. Was she ready for that? She looked at Loki and then at Sigyn and decided.
“I'm okay with it, but I'm sorry.” The god frowned.
“Sorry for what?”
“You'll see.” She told him.
Everyone quieted down as Loki closed his eyes and placed his fingers on each temple. When he started using his magic, she felt it. Suddenly she was seeing things she hadn't thought about for years. Conversations with friends, fights with family members, crying alone in her room at night, laughing at herself, laughing with her brother, singing in front of the mirror. All her life flashed through her mind in a matter of seconds. After a few moments, she felt Loki stop on one memory. It was all black, like she was inside of a tunnel. The echo of a heartbeat could be heard.  She didn't remember that one.
“Hello my baby, you are so beautiful.” A woman's voice rang out. “My little Astrid. My goddess of strength and wisdom.” The woman sighed. “I am terribly sorry for leaving you, I hope one day you will be able to forgive me... Do not cry, your mother loves you. You will be a hero, my love. The prophecy must come true.”
“Mom! What are you doing?”
“Talking to your sister.” She simply said, “You will remember this when the time is right.” She whispered to her.
Suddenly Loki pulled his hands away and stared at her wide eyed while she still had her eyes closed. When she opened them, she got up from the couch.
“I need a moment.” And with that she left.
...
What the hell, what the hell, what the hell, what the hell just happened? Y/N repeated in her mind as she ran to her room. Once she entered she slammed the door shut.
...
“How long have you known this?” Loki asked Strange.
“A week after she started following her. But I've known since I met her that she was not mortal.”
“How?” Steve asked, finally speaking up after being silent for the entirety of the reveal.
“The magic she possesses, it's very strong.” The sorcerer said. “A mortal's body could not contain it.”
...
She felt it again, every emotion she ever felt, penting up inside her. She couldn't go back again, she couldn't.
...
“Maybe I should go talk to her.” Sigyn said, resolved.
“That is the last thing you should do. I will go.” Loki told her and no one stopped him. They knew that he was the only one she would want to see at that moment.
...
She grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil.
...
Loki knocked on her door, but when no one answered, not even after minutes of calling her, he decided to enter anyway. He felt panic rise in his throat when he saw that the room was empty, and a complete mess. He almost went to tell the others that she had escaped when he stopped, seeing a piece of paper with something written on the floor. He picked it up and read it.
“I can't stop it. I'm going back.”
~taglist~ @mischief2sarawr @midnights-ramblings @mealoncholy-hill @paetonnn 
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puppypeter · 4 years ago
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✨ All fics are complete! ✨
He Loves Me Cause I’m Cute, He Thinks I’m Pretty Funny | 2588 words 📱
He watches it back one more time after it posts, checking for typos in his subtitles and captions, and has to laugh again.
Steve fucking Rogers? His brain thought he could pull Captain America, literal superhero and America’s favorite sweetheart?
“Hello I’m a 35 year old amputee living in New York and I think that I could get Steve Rogers.”
OR
the one where bucky posts a tiktok and steve is utterly smitten.
Summer Slipped Us Underneath Her Tongue | 10712 words 🧳
Bucky is a tour guide who enjoys sharing the rich history and culture of each city they pass through with a bunch of early-20's college students who just want to know the cheapest place to get drunk.
Except for Steve, who asks Bucky for a personal tour around his hometown.
The rest is, as they say, history.
You Make My Heart Skip A Beet | 3853 words 🧑🏼‍🍳
“I made soda bread.” Steve lets out the 6’2” supersoldier equivalent of a squeak. “Oh, I love soda bread,” he says eagerly, rolling forward on the balls of his feet like he does when he gets excited. “My mom used to make it all the time when I was growing up.” The tips of Barnes’s ears turn red, and he mutters something that sounds suspiciously like, “I know.”
Ollie Meets Bagel | 5517 words 🥯
He was a skater boy, Steve said let's get bagels, boy.
Steve wants to start doing this twenty-first century thing properly. He gets help in the form of skateboarding, skateboarders, bagels, and Sam Wilson.
Taxi | 5113 words 🚕
Bucky Barnes was, he hoped, a good taxi driver.
He's so good, he actually tries to return lost property that ends up left in his car and... well. It has some unexpected consequences involving a National Icon.
Enough said.
Leg Day | 12157 words 🏋️‍♂️
“So talk to him,” Sam says.
“I can’t,” Bucky groans. “I can’t, Sam, I. He just.” He fluffs his hair up and stares at Sam, distraught. “I want him to bench press me.”
“Okay, so it’s serious,” Sam interprets. “Got it."
(Or: The one where Sam is Bucky's long-suffering roommate, Bucky is a hot mess of a millennial, and Hot Steve spends far too much time on the Lat Pull-Down machine.)
Love In Aisle Four | 2127 words 🛍️
When Bucky needs to swing by the supermarket after a long, hard day of work, the last thing he expects is to meet a cute grocery clerk named Steve…
Coming Up Easy | 45515 words ✍🏻
“Listen, I was just thinking,” Steve says, his face open, eyebrows raised in a tentatively hopeful expression. “Why don’t you come stay at my place for a while? I’ve got an office that I barely use, and a change of scenery might do you good, right? Help you beat that writer’s block?” With a crooked smile, he adds, “I promise I’m not a serial killer.”
While Bucky would normally crack a joke about how that’s exactly what a serial killer would say, right now, all he can do is blink at Steve in surprise, heart tripping over itself in his chest. Steve wants him to come and stay at his place. In Massachusetts. Just the two of them.
"Oh," Bucky croaks. "I- Wow."
“I mean, no pressure,” Steve says hastily. “Totally fine if you don’t wanna. I just thought I’d offer, in case it might help, y’know?”
“Yeah.” Bucky ignores the little voice in his head that sounds an awful lot Nat and Becca, telling him he’s setting himself up for heartbreak. “I mean, if you’re sure, that would be amazing.”
Anywhere The Wind Blows | 8845 words 👨‍🚒🎖️
After a catastrophic fire that shakes him to his core, Steve Rogers quits his job as a Brooklyn firefighter and relocates to a cabin in the remote Canadian wilderness, wanting quiet and solitude and to maybe never have to speak to another human being ever again. He gets his wish, more or less, until a recently injured Bucky Barnes is discharged from the Army and rents the cabin next door.
The Safer Course | 7918 words | Part 1 of Won’t You Be My Neighbor 🏡
When Steve moves to the suburbs in 2033, he intends to retire from superhero life.
He does not intend to fall in love with his pain-in-the-ass neighbor.
Every Year I Have You | 7064 words | Part 2 of Won’t You Be My Neighbor 🏡
Steve set the bar pretty high, as birthday presents go.
Bucky is determined to outdo him when July 4th comes around.
Beneath The Mistletoe | 21203 words 🎄
Bucky had a bet with his sister that if he didn’t have a boyfriend to bring home for Christmas by the time he was 25, he had to give her $200 and go blonde for a year. But now he's 25, it’s nearing December, and not only is Bucky as single as ever, but he’s also running low on cash. He doesn’t exactly want to bleach his hair, either.
At least Steve is willing to upgrade their relationship from best friends to fake boyfriends.
The Settler | 52203 words 🍞
“What do you want to do?”
Steve pauses and looks at them.
What he wants is to stay with them. He doesn't have any family left, they all died before he even joined the war and became... this. Captain America turned whatever he is now. But Natasha and Sam have become his family over the years. Not just because they're on the run together, fugitives and vigilantes, but way before that too.
He doesn't want to leave that.
But he knows that, realistically, he can't stay with them and they can't stay with him.
So he looks at them with a smile and lies. “I don't know.”
OR; In which Steve retires and finally finds a place to call home.
You Can’t Put Your Arms Around A Memory | 1148 words 🐈
"Alright, Bucky," Steve slows his steps, watches his neighbour stop at the bottom of the next flight of stairs. There's a canvas bag in his hand that Steve didn't notice earlier, cream coloured with the figure of a sleeping, black cat painted on it. "Have a good day."
He thinks Bucky's cheeks pink up a bit right then and there, but Steve can't tell. He's too distracted by his pounding, foolish heart, by the way Bucky smiles bashfully, and ducks his head. The way he seems like he wants to stay.
To Believe In Tomorrow | 3959 words 👨🏻‍🌾
Bucky's mornings at the community garden get a little more interesting when the new guy shows up.
Maybe This Christmas | 24873 words | Part 1 of Maybe ❄️
Bucky’s not going home for Christmas. But it’s fine. He’s spending Christmas alone in his apartment, but it’s cool. He’s not feeling up to seeing his family after his accident anyway, plus he has to work. He’s totally fine with it. But then he runs into Steve, literally, and suddenly his Christmas isn’t looking so empty after all.
-----
Hurrying was a bad idea. Bucky’s foot hits a patch of ice and slides out from under him in what would have been a comical cartoon banana-peel-like trip, if it wasn’t happening to him, and he braces himself to hit the ground. This is going to hurt.
“Fuck,” Bucky screeches, but as he lands on his back, it’s not the cold hard concrete he expected, but a solid mass beneath him. Oh god, Bucky thinks as he realises he smacked into the person behind him and took them down with him.
Maybe This Year (Will Be Better Than Last) | 133868 words | Part 2 of Maybe ❄️
Last year, Bucky Barnes met Steve Rogers. Well actually, he slipped and fell on him. What followed was the best Christmas either of them had ever had. But what happens when Christmas is over and life returns to normal? What happens after the Christmas miracle?
-----
Bucky should have known. He did know. When things seem too good to be true, they usually are. And Steve is the best thing that has happened to him in a long time, possibly ever, so of course it couldn’t last.
Maybe This Time (I Hope I Get The Chance To Say Goodbye) | 34561 words | Part 3 of Maybe ❄️
Steve and Bucky Barnes are happily married. They've made it through some hard times and come out stronger and happier, together. Then Steve gets called on to come out of retirement for the most important mission of his life and everything changes. Everything.
-----
“Have yourself a merry little Christmas…” Steve starts singing along softly, and Bucky chuckles, before leaning his head onto Steve’s shoulder, always happy when he’s in Steve’s arms.
“From now on, our troubles will be miles away…” Bucky joins in.
Dancing round their living room, just as in love as ever, their troubles seem light-years away, if not non-existent.
Sadly, they’re closer than they think.
The Unexpected Gift | 9504 words | Part 1 of When Winter Comes 🐕
Steve Rogers is fine.
After ending a long-term relationship with Sam Wilson, Steve moves back to New York. He's tired and lonely but depressed? No. At least, that's what he thinks.
From the window of his apartment, he watches a dark-haired man and his service dog sitting in the park, wondering what his story is.
The Winter Storm | 2218 words | Part 2 of When Winter Comes 🐕
"If I could give you one thing in life, I would give you the ability you see yourself through my eyes, only then would you realize how special you are to me."
After Bucky and Steve confessed their feelings for each other, life has its own twisted way to challenge the most profound love.
One January Night | 4213 words | Part 3 of When Winter Comes 🐕
Before going back to work, Steve Rogers still has things to learn: 1- Depression is a bitch and the battle against it isn't an easy one. 2- Dating a person with disabilities comes with its share of challenges.
Bucky Barnes Has His Shit Together (And Other Lies He Tells Himself) | 14159 words 🔒
You’d think a guy who owns one of the most successful bakeries in Brooklyn, has a million-dollar smile and that antiquated good ol’ boy charm, blond hair and blue eyes and biceps for days, would know what’s what.
But don’t let that fool you: Steve Rogers is a mess.
Obvious | 917 words ☕
"Oh, I have a prompt! So, it makes me laugh how painfully obvious Steve and Bucky's feelings are to everyone when they're in that pining, slowburn, does-he-doesn't-he phase. But imagine Steve and Bucky working in a coffee shop together and constantly bickering, nudging and playfully flirting with each other. And all the employees and patrons are so invested in their relationship and just want them to kiss already but no one realizes that Steve and Bucky have been married since they got out of HS."
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mypoisonedvine · 4 years ago
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Seeing Red | bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x actress!reader (part 8)
(part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4) (part 5) (part 6) (part 7)
series summary: bucky used to brag that he didn’t have a celebrity crush, or really care about famous people at all, which is what made him the perfect person to start working for a celebrity like yourself.  except, of course, it’s just his luck that he’d fall for you.
word count: 3k
warnings: smut (semi-public sex), possessiveness (some sexual, some not), jealousy, some fluff and some angst, also some violence (including a very small amount against the reader, proceed with caution), mentions of infidelity in a previous relationship
a/n: oh y’all thought it was gonna be smooth sailing from here on out? lol
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You didn’t want to abandon Bucky to do carpetside interviews, but he refused to get anywhere near a hot mic so you let him go while you walked over to a reporter you recognized; she’d been nice before, probably would be again this time, so you were a little relieved to see her tonight.
She introduced you to the camera and you were slightly spaced out until she turned to you and got your attention again.  “So, you’ve been making a lot of headlines lately for your new relationship— what’s the scoop?  How’s it going?” she asked playfully, pushing the microphone into your face.
“Uh, great,” you breamed, “he’s my date tonight and he seems to have disappeared to…” you turned around to look for him.  “Oh, he’s talking to... is that... Laurence Fishburne?”
“James, is that his name?” she prompted, making you focus your attention back on the interview.
“Um, yeah,” you nodded, the name sounding a bit foreign, “legally, but he goes mostly by his nickname Bucky.”
“Aw, that’s cute,” she smiled.  “He’s, uh…” her eyes widened a bit and you laughed.
“Yeah, he is,” you smirked.  “I assume by that facial expression you mean ‘crazy hot.’”
“I mean, in the politest way possible… yeah,” she giggled.
“Yeah, no, don’t pretend not to notice for my sake, cause, yeah, it’s… apparent.”
“Apparently he was your driver first?” she pressed.
“Yes!” you beamed, and then heard the way it sounded and backpedaled slightly.  “I promise that’s not why I hired him.  I actually didn’t meet him before he was on my team, but, I mean, I wasn’t mad to have some eye candy in the front seat.”
“Eye candy, huh?”
“But he’s so much more than that, that’s the thing,” you explained.  “We became good friends first, because he’s so smart and funny and kind and… I mean, I know he looks tough, and he is, but he’s really very sensitive underneath the slightly intimidating exterior.”
“Hard shell, soft center, sweet— he really does sound like candy!”
“Indeed,” you nodded.  “Gotta run but it was nice to chat!”
You dashed over to Bucky and clung onto his arm.  “Oh, hey, we were just talking about you,” he beamed.
“Loved you in After Midnight,” Mr. Fishburne smiled and even you were totally starstruck.
“Oh, wow, thanks, I loved you in… everything…” you trailed off, internally scolding yourself for the vague and useless compliment.  He was about to respond but was pulled away by some member of his team, giving you and Bucky a quick wave as he began a carpet-side interview.
“That was Laurence Fishburne, wasn’t it.” Bucky mumbled to you in a stunned monotone.  
“Yes, what were you doing talking to him?” you asked, amazed at his bravery to approach such a huge star.
“He came up to me, to congratulate me on… on dating you, I guess…”
“Or he mixed you up with Brad Pitt,” you shrugged.
“Yeah, if Brad Pitt lost all his money, spent a decade in the desert, went loco and buzzed all his hair off,” Bucky rolled his eyes.
“Oh come on, you look great,” you soothed him, straightening his tie.  “Wanna go take some pictures?”
“I’m a little scared,” he admitted with a shy smile.
“It’s easy, just give them that sexy brooding look you do so well.”
Bucky smirked pridefully.  “You think so?”
“Totally.  You’re a natural,” you assured.
You tugged his arm and guided him to the carpet, letting him lead the way (or look like he was leading the way) as you found a clear spot and noticed how the cameras instantly flashed faster and brighter.  Photographers called your name to get your attention, and you waved and smiled and pulled Bucky closer.  The feeling of his arm around your waist was warm and comforting, and you hoped holding you had the same effect for him.
“Where are you looking?” you asked.
“At you,” he answered.
“Bucky,” you giggled, “you’re supposed to look at the cameras!”
“I honestly can’t, it’s blinding,” he frowned.
“Here,” you sighed, pointing out into the darkness just above the sea of flashing lights.  “Look out there.”
“I can’t see anything!”
“I know, but, look as if there was something there to look at, trust me, it helps.”
You adjusted slightly a few times, turning a little to show off the low back of your dress.  You almost gasped when Bucky held your face and kissed you suddenly, but you were happy to melt into it even as you heard the cameras flash even more aggressively, some whoops and hollers coming from the crowd on and off the carpet.
He pulled back and you wanted to chase him for more but you realized it wasn’t the right time.  
“Let’s go inside,” you offered, guiding him the rest of the way down the carpet— mainly because you were afraid you’d end up jumping his bones right here in front of everyone.
He nodded and followed close by, arm resting on your shoulder the whole time, and just as you saw one of your friends and thought you might want to go over and introduce her to Bucky, you saw who she was talking to.
Sam.  
Seeing him always made your heart stop.  At first, it was because you were starstruck by him, in awe of his talent, amazed that you were going to be working with someone you admired so much.  Then it was because you had fallen for him and he had gladly swept you off your feet, bringing you into a whirlwind romance that at the time had felt like the only thing that mattered.  But since the break-up, and now, it was something else.  Fear wasn’t the word, it’s not like you were afraid of him in a literal sense, but there was this anxiety, this tenseness to seeing him.  It always brought back memories— the best and the worst, all at once.  Nights laughing together, sharing secrets, stealing glances and touches and kisses; nights spent alone staring at a phone that never rang.  Limbs tangled together between the sheets, that warm brown skin encompassing and surrounding yours; laying side by side in a bed that isn’t empty but is still plenty cold, seeing the way he angles his phone away from you and wishing you had the strength to just leave because you already knew what he was doing.  The first time you said ‘I love you.’  The first time he said ‘it won’t happen again.’
“You alright?” Bucky asked, tearing you from your thoughts.  You looked away and met Bucky’s gaze, hoping he either hadn’t seen your ex or at least hadn’t recognized him.  
“Yeah, I’m great,” you answered quickly, “let’s go get some drinks maybe?  And then I need to show you off to some people.”
“Show me off?” he scoffed.
“Yeah, why did you think I brought you here, really?” you winked.
“Hey, if we’re showing each other off, does that mean you’ll come to my next high school reunion?”
//
You’d been antsy ever since the two of you had come inside; it was obvious from the way you were clinging so much closer to him, and yet it was clear that your mind was a million miles away.
“Hey, it’s starting to wrap up, wanna head out soon?” you asked, trying to act casual, but he saw the way your eyes were darting up to where Sam Wilson was mingling and he knew it wasn’t about getting home early.  Did you really think he wouldn’t notice that you’d seen him?
“Whatever you wanna do,” he shrugged.
“Okay, could you bring the car around for me then?  And I’ll meet you outside?” you offered.  “I should say hi and bye to a few people.”
“Sure,” he agreed, starting to walk away after giving you a quick kiss on the cheek.
And he really did try to do what he said he was going to, but the further away he walked, the more he glanced back to watch you walk across the room, the harder it was to just let it go.  He knew you were going to talk to him, and before he really even decided to do anything about it he found himself circling back around the room, following you.  
He thought he’d lost you when he turned a corner and you were gone, but then he heard voices from a doorway and cracked it open slightly to see you inside with a few other people, nobody he recognized although one of them he’d definitely seen in something before.
He sighed with relief, about to turn and go get the car like he said he would, but then Sam Wilson just had to magically materialize out of thin air as he stepped up behind you and tapped your shoulder.
“Sam!” you blurted out, spinning to face him with wide eyes.
“Hey,” he greeted, acting all suave and shit, making Bucky’s blood boil.  “You look great.”
“Oh, thanks,” you mumbled, “you too.”
“You’ve been all over the internet lately, making quite the splash,” he recalled with a contemplative nod.  “You and this new boytoy you’ve got.”
“I think the word you’re looking for is boyfriend,” you corrected sternly.  
“Honey,” he scoffed as he rolled his eyes.  Bucky couldn’t decide if it was worse to hear him call you a pet name in earnest or with the derogatory tone that he currently had.  “Everybody knows you go through these guys like potato chips.  Especially when they’re not famous— how many PAs did you hook up with on your last set, huh?”
“I don’t roll like that anymore,” you denied.
“That’s not what Jake Friedman says,” Sam smirked.  It actually took Bucky a moment to remember that that was the guy you’d… entertained in the backseat of your car, or maybe it was more that he had entertained you; you seemed to tense up when Sam mentioned him, as did Bucky.  “I mean, sure, he’s not crew, but he’s not famous the way you are.  The way we are.  And neither is your new guy.  He doesn’t ‘get it’, does he?  He doesn’t get what it’s like.  Has he already started freaking out about all the hate online?”
Bucky regretted that he’d ever said anything about that; if he’d known it would come around to prove Sam Wilson right about something, he wouldn’t have done it.  “No,” you lied.
“Well, he will,” Sam assured you, stepping a little closer to you and letting his fingers languidly brush over your arm.  “I made a mistake before, letting you go.”
“Damn right,” you hissed as you pulled away from him.
“But I realized that, and now I’m wondering why we aren’t giving the people what they want.”
“That’s what I never understood about you,” you frowned.  “It’s always about other people with you.  It’s never about you, and it was never about me.”
“But it is about you,” he explained, “and me: us.  You’re forgetting how good we were together.”
You shook your head.  “I was single for years and you never called.  Now you’re all over me with all these regrets about ending it?  Get a grip, Sam.  This is about you wanting what you can’t have.”
“Can’t have?” he repeated incredulously.  “Baby,” he purred— and Bucky decided it was definitely worse to hear him call you that in earnest.  “You know you’re always gonna be mine.”
As you started to shiver, Sam’s arms slipping around your back and grabbing your waist, Bucky felt like he had lost control of his body.  He was watching himself from far away as he stormed across the room, nearly knocking a few people over on the way, and shoved Sam off of you and onto the ground.
“Bucky!” you yelped.  “Bucky, stop!”
“You’d better watch your hands, Wilson, before they get somewhere they’re not supposed to be,” Bucky growled, ignoring you completely even as you helplessly tugged at his suit.  
“Jesus,” Sam spat, “the fuck is wrong with you?”
“What are you doing?” you asked Bucky, irate and confused as you stared up at him with a furrowed brow.  He grabbed your hand and guided you out of the room and down the hall, barely managing to drag you into a random bathroom before he started tearing at your dress, leaving rough bites and kisses down your neck as you gasped and moaned softly.  
“Mine,” he mumbled against your skin, “all mine.  Did you forget?”
“No,” you sighed, “I could never…”
“That’s not what it looked like,” he sneered, hiking up your long skirt to run his fingers over your skin and expose the delicate, lacy panties you were wearing. 
“Bucky, please,” you sighed, rubbing your hips up against his leg, riding his thigh shamelessly.
“What’s got you so worked up, baby?  Is it me, or him?” he asked darkly.
“You, baby, just you, nobody else— I’m yours,” you assured him feverishly, “I’m all yours, please, I need you.”
“Yeah?” he breathed, fumbling with his belt and fly as he pulled his growing cock from his suit pants.  “You need it that bad?”
“Please,” you sobbed, “fuck me.”
He pulled your underwear aside and quickly shoved into you, groaning at the feeling of your walls stretching to welcome him.  “Fuck, angel, so tight,” he sighed, knowing how much little praises drove you crazy.
“Bucky,” you sighed, “oh my god… harder, please— n-need you deeper…”
His hips moved back only to slam back against yours, making you whimper; he smiled when he felt your leg wrap around his waist and try to hold him inside, but he couldn’t slow down now, not when he needed this so bad.
He sucked on your neck as he kept thrusting into you, your wetness coating his cock so thoroughly that he slid right home every time.  It was clear that he was hitting your g-spot from how you moaned with each thrust, your spongy channel pulsing and tightening in rhythmic patterns.
Overcome with the need to assert his, for lack of a better word, ownership over you, he found himself reaching up to hold your throat— not quite in the way to choke you, just to remind you that he could, if he wanted to.
“Did he ever make you come like this?” he asked with a gravelly whisper, lips right against your ear as he tightened his hand around your neck slightly.
“No,” you shook your head, “nobody has.”
“Nobody’s ever loved you this good but me, is that it?  Nobody else has ever fucked you like this?”
“Just you, Bucky, please don’t stop— I’m so close…”
“Do you think they can hear you out in the hallway?  Say my name when you come, princess, just in case they can— I want them to know who’s making you feel this good.”
“Bucky,” you whined, chanting it over and over with a few ‘yes’s and ‘fuck’s interspersed occasionally.  He thrusted faster and harder as he felt his own orgasm building; he needed to come inside you and claim you again, mark you as his one more time, and the flexing of your walls was only egging him on.
“I know you’re close, baby, just let go,” he whispered against your ear, “come for me, just like that, you’re doing so good— fuck, so good for me…”
You whimpered and clutched at his shoulders, a gush of wetness and a final, strong tightening of your inner muscles signaling that you’d reached your peak.  He couldn’t hold back any longer when he saw (and felt) that, groaning as he began to release thick streams of come into you.
The absolute second your afterglow began to fade, you pushed him off of you and grimaced as you adjusted your panties and dress.  "The fuck is wrong with you?"
"Wh— what?" he stammered, breathless and confused.  "What did I do?  Was I not supposed to come inside?"
You gaped at him in shock.  "Do you really not realize what you did?  Bucky, you assaulted my ex-boyfriend."
"I— he'll be fine," he dismissed, "he was putting his hands on you, what was I supposed to do, just let him do it?"
"You were supposed to let me handle it," you hissed.  "You were supposed to be pulling the car around and not spying on me!"
"Spying?!  I was protecting you."
"You shoved him hard enough to knock him over, Bucky, that's not okay."
"Hold on," he shook his head in disbelief, "so you're mad at me, when we just had sex?!  Why didn't you say something before?"
"Just cause it's hot doesn't mean it's okay," you explained, a little embarrassed.
"Tell me something," he frowned, "what is this—" he motioned to the space between the two of you— "to you?  Cause it kinda seems like I think we're boyfriend and girlfriend, and you think—"
"What?  What do I think?" you challenged.  "Go ahead, tell me."
"You think it's just a sex thing."
"Oh my god," you rolled your eyes.
"Well, what am I supposed to think when you get off on me dealing with your ex, and then tell me it's this big terrible thing?"
A sick idea clawed its way out of the back of Bucky's mind: was Sam right about her?  Was Sam right about us?
You crossed your arms and huffed, but didn't respond.
"Was everything that just happened just a fuckin' kink for you or something?  Cause I meant every goddamn word," he growled.
You sighed, like you weren't taking it seriously— like you weren't taking him seriously.  His fist tightened at his side involuntarily.  He'd never felt so used, so ignored; or, at least, he never expected it from you.  "We'll talk about this later," you dismissed quickly.  "Let's just go back there and put on a happy face, okay?"
"Oh, so you can let another guy feel you up?  Sounds like a fucking blast," he hissed.
"Fuck you," you snarled as you pushed him aside to leave the bathroom.
He didn't remember grabbing you, he didn't remember twisting your arm as he pulled you back.  He didn't remember you crying out, trying to wrench yourself away, clawing at his grip on you.  All he remembered was you looking up at him with watery eyes, expression twisted in fear.
"Bucky, you're hurting me," you whimpered weakly, and only then did he notice his metal hand was holding your wrist.  When he let go, he already saw a mark forming in the shape of his hand as you grabbed your freed wrist to rub the damaged flesh.
"I'm sorry—" he began to whisper, but you were already gone.
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oneoftheprettynerds · 4 years ago
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Welcome To The Darkside: Dark!Steve x Reader (Mob AU)
Chapter 1 in the Lipstick and Crayons Series
A/N: I just posted a story I know but I’m in love with this idea right now and this is my favourite fic right now. It’s going to be a three or four part fic I think and your support in any form: like, comment or reblog is appreciated greatly. Here is a piece of my heart right here.
Warning: Eventual Non-Con, Sickening Threats, Mob Themes, Violence, Death, Manipulation, sort of Blood Kink I think, Cheap Tricks later.
Genres + Characters: Mob AU, Single Parents AU, Steve Rogers x Reader.
Summary: Steve can't ever repay you for what you did. After meeting you, Steve believes his broken family is the missing piece in the puzzle of your own wrecked one. Indebting the crime lord to you has been the biggest mistake of your life, cause now you can't get rid of him, no matter what. Loyalty and favours go a long way in the mob.
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Chapter 1 : Welcome to The Darkside
The gunshots around you frightened you more than anything in your life ever had. The merry, joyful ambience of the carnival was ruined in an instant. Screams around you provoked your panic-stricken form to gather your wits and run or hide. It wasn’t just you caught up in this dreadful situation, there was also someone you’d protect at any cost.
Picking your daughter up and setting her on your hip, you looked around for the way out. Who would have thought that open grounds were hard to get out of? Another wave of terror ran through you when the gunshots audibly neared and the crowd ran in random directions.
You decided to go along the way you recognised the games and shops at. You ran as fast as you could, checking on Grace in between to find her looking curiously all around but still more intent on eating her cotton candy than inspecting. You couldn’t be more thankful for kids' oblivion than at that moment in time.
A bomb explosion up ahead in your path made you halt in your tracks because you knew some of the attackers were scouting there. Turning back wasn’t an option, neither was crying and you were sure you closer to the exit this way. Another blast behind you took away the option of you retracing your path. You weren’t considering it but it gave you little comfort to have your options open.
As the shrieks and screeches grew tenfold, your best bet was to hide, the assaulters had already surrounded the field, the chaos around you informed you. Jumping through innumerable dead bodies, of kids and adults that ached your heart, and dodging bullets while laying low, you went inside a photo booth to hide.
This will not be in vain; you’d protect Grace no matter what.
The curtain to the photo booth provided cover from predatory eyes while the rest of the metal booth was quite safe against bullets you concluded hopefully.
You were just looking for a weapon to prepare for any adversity that might come your way, when the sound of crunching of pebbles made their way to your ears.
Failing to find a weapon in few seconds you opted to attack the intruder yourself when a voice reached your ears, “Mama?”
You puzzled your eyebrows and lowered your defences by just a bit when a toddler stumbled inside the booth, blonde haired and blue eyed. You were definitely not this girl’s mama but you grabbed the kid’s forearm and pulled her inside, shushing her gently and seating her beside Grace on the sitting bench inside. You were thankful Grace entertained her by offering her the pink cloud of sweetness.
You peeked outside but failed to find anyone else in 20 metre radii of you, nobody resembling the wandering kid nor looking for one. You did not know what you would do with another kid in your hands in this dire situation nor was it a wise decision to bring her inside and take her under your wing but you did not have it in you to leave an unsuspecting child, a mere four or three-year-old at that, during a calamity so extreme.
Your maternal instincts governed your thought process, imagining Grace to be in her shoes, all alone and discarded while a possible terrorist attack was happening. The kids’ corpses lying outside gave you no doubt that these children’s fate would be the same if found by the attackers.
A small tug in your dress made you look back and you found the azure eyed kid at your feet, offering you the street food you bought earlier while hugging your leg and observing you. Grace munched in the back silently, still happily eating and unaware.
You kneeled and whispered, “What’s your name, honey?” Maybe the girl understood the urgency, maybe she was just mimicking you but even she murmured in a low voice, “Sarah.”
You nodded, “Sweetie, I need you to sit there quietly and make no sounds, okay? We are playing a staying quiet game.” That was a stupid thing to ask of a kid but you hoped, you really, really hoped she would comply.
Her eyes widened in recognition of something as she eagerly asked, still in a hushed mumble, “Like I does for Dada in meekings?”
“Yes, you smart kiddo. Exactly that.” You replied with what you hoped was a convincing smile and ruffled her hair while nudging her towards her former seat. With kids, you knew a little encouragement went a long way to get them to do things. She whispered an ‘okay Mama’ and went about and sat.
You didn’t get to enjoy her obedience as the thud of pebbles crunching met your ears again. Your breath hitched; your intuition told you that this was not another kid confusing you for its parent.
Your eyes found a discarded piece of metal rod from the booth’s wrecked framework. You grabbed and hoped for the best, to save both the kids at your ability’s mercy.
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Steve only saw red. The moment the first shot sounded in the air, he knew whom the assailants were, whom they were coming for. Going out tonight was a bad idea, a really reckless one indeed but when his daughter started bawling seeing the carnival’s lights from the car and wanted to get up and close, he couldn’t say no. He really tried to though, he really did.
It hadn’t been even a year since his wife died, but the father-daughter duo was getting by. He knew his wife took his daughter to the carnival and bought her things, toys and teddies, on every birthday of her own. It was a ritual his wife started, spending her birthday with her little offspring during the daylight and going out for a romantic dinner at the end of the day with her dear spouse. If only things could still be that way, could still stay the same.
When his wife turned out to be an elaborate spy all along, he was baffled. His professional side was, dare he say, impressed by the commitment to character but his personal side was beyond disappointed, disheartened in the worst way because his daughter was his most precious asset in this cruel world and that gift was given by such a treacherous person.
She begged and pled for mercy, to let Sarah have her mother and swore on her life that she quit her espionage journey when she actually fell in love but Steve didn’t trust a single syllable out of her filthy, deceiving mouth, not anymore.
He didn’t kill her though, because Sarah was his first priority no matter what. Her assassination was the work of his rival mob, ‘The Vice Kings’ led by the bastard Rumlow. It was an open invitation for war in the city, for them money came first and useless people had to die. They killed two birds with a single stone, git rid of a useless former member and successfully made a statement.
Then began the still happening rivalry between those Vices and his mob, ‘The Avenging Cartel’. The wound from his wife’s assassination was still fresh, he didn’t miss her as much as he had taken the hit to his pride. There had been a peaceful agreement until the brutal maiming of his spouse and now he was working more than ever, barely able to make time for his princess and that was his only regret, missing her childhood.
And now he felt more futile, his palette of emotions ranging from hues of ire to shades of dread. He couldn’t believe his entourage of trained professionals failed to monitor a two-year-old. He had just stepped aside to take a call, leaving her with his latest driver and three bodyguards. How could he be that clueless to not realise the imposters infiltrating his ranks, standing right there and selling away his location?
As soon as the sound of the first firearm shooting reached his ears, he leapt towards his daughter only to find her missing. His little minx thankfully escaped for one of her little adventures and successfully evaded these cheats, whom he shot right in the middle of the eyes when he glanced at the grenades packing in the coats’ undersides.
His moment of gratitude evaporated in mere seconds as he realised that the Vices now surrounded the entire area, their mission being his daughter’s abduction. If they wanted to kill both of them, they would have already, considering Steve’s distraction gave them quite too many openings. They wanted him to surrender, because mobs worked that way; only when one leader signed off his territories did it become the other party’s possession. If they just cut one head, another would grow in its place, a new leader would succeed the predecessor.
He sent emergency signals to both Barnes and Wilson, the only ones he could trust right now, summoning them with back-ups. The screams of the crowd did not ease him at all, piling on his burden and stress as he prayed for the first time ever, that by some miracle he would reach his daughter first in this field and she would safely be in his arms by the end of the night, not become a victim to what his enemies were planning.
He did have a tracker in her pendant but this realisation hit him later than he’d like to admit, the frustration clawing away his wits. The ground was now quite empty, piles of bodies scattered across the field abruptly where people became victims to the grenades, any person who failed to protect themselves, died. As he was pulling his phone out again, his eyes caught sight a flower bead. The same bead he and his daughter used to make a bracelet a month ago. She wore that everywhere, to day-care, while bathing, to birthdays.
The bracelet was obviously broken now but it was almost like a trail that led to his treasure, like in the Hansel and Gretel’s fairy-tale that Sarah loved. He followed with quiet steps, the beads far apart and some resting under the debris but they sure did lead him somewhere, and when he found the even the pendant in his path, he knew he had only the few beads to rely on.
Some thumps and crashes made him alert, his pistol ready, and when he neared carefully to a distorted metal framework of sorts, his eyes widened.
A young woman had a body in front of her lying on the ground. In a pool of scarlet it rested, still and unmoving while her breathing quickened, her eyes shining with tears that she tried too damn hard to confine to her eyes. He knew how hard the first kill always was, but one grows numb with increase in body count.
Brave women were his type and he would have been turned on by her courage, her hands stained red with whatever weapon she attacked with. Her soft facial features and her curves in the dress she wore were a show stopper for sure, and he would’ve been flirting with her if it was not for the brutal severity of the situation, his daughter missing and in possible danger.
His vigilant senses, courtesy of the epinephrin, picked up two things; the butterfly bead that rested in the door of the booth the woman stood at and the creep shadowing her from behind, ready to attack with a baseball bat he might have found in one of the other game shops.
Steve used his position behind the neighbouring booth to make a bull’s eye shot, the bullet going just an inch above the female’s shoulder and going across the creep’s head. The logo on the corpse’s leather jacket showed Steve he picked the right side to defend.
The sheer suddenness of the move caught the woman off guard as she dropped her weapon and twisted back to find the soulless eyes of her possible attacker staring at her. She quickly armed herself with her attacking rod once again and tried to trace the bullet back from its shooter, her eyes wide and calculating.
Steve decided it was time to interrogate, to find Sarah.
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The graze of the bullet above your shoulder alarmed you and you stood dumbfounded only for an instant though. You were sure the bullet was meant for you but the thud of a body behind you, seemingly preparing to attack you proved you wrong.
Calming yourself, you still stood on the ball, because someone killing your attacker didn’t necessarily mean you were safe. With just a pull of the trigger, your fate could very easily be the same. You had to play this smart.
“Lower your weapon. I won’t repeat myself.” A husky voice called out, laced with seriousness which left no room for argument.
You did as he said, knowing that shabby rod was no match against the gun. He stepped out from his hiding position and gave away his location, steps slightly treading towards you. Your hands trembled, heart thumping a bit too loud while blood and sweat coated your frame.
When moonlight lightened his face, you saw his blonde luscious locks, slightly overgrown, a neatly trimmed beard darker than his hair and the cerulean blue eyes that were clear as crystal but shadowed with proficiency.
“Good, now did you see a kid around here? Blonde and blue eyes?”
His question didn’t surprise you, the gun barrel trained on you did. The previous man you had killed, that laid dead ahead of you had asked the same question. You did not know why they were after the toddler nor did you have the time to dwell on it. Time was of the essence now and he was expecting an answer.
The fact that he saved an unsuspecting lady was a plus point, but you also had to consider that he was threatening you all the same. But if that was his kid, it was understood, the resemblance between them was uncanny but that wasn’t enough proof. However, as your flickered to the man you killed, you noticed the logo on his jacket was the same as the one on your possible murderer’s jacket. It still wasn’t enough evidence but you had no choice, the man had a gun and you had two kids relying on you. At least he wasn’t on the bombing side.
“Yes, what is she to you?” You tried to be brave but you were sure he saw right through you.
“You don’t ask the questions here but this one I’ll answer. She is my daughter. Now, where is she?”  
“How do I know you’re not lying? I can’t just and her over to you!”
“Her name is Sarah; she is my carbon copy. She is wearing a pink dress with white flowers; pink crocs and her hair is in a ponytail with a white scrunchy. She had two white clips in her hair beside the ponytail. Enough proof?”
No, you could be a creepy paedophile for all I know.
You were still contemplating when he spoke again, “She’s my daughter and I know she’s in that booth beside you. I appreciate you trying to protect her I think but she’ll respond to me calling her. Sarah?”
The little toddler poked her head out, her eyes brightening in recognition and you heaved a sigh of relief involuntarily. Your maternal instinct made you anxious for kids you barely even knew. She ran towards her father shouting ‘Dada’ and jumped into his arms while he hid his gun. You almost snorted at that, tons of dead bodies surrounding you and he was worried about the gun?
He propped her up, hugging her tightly, and with what you knew now, he was scared to death and rightfully so.
Grace poked her head out and ran towards you now, hugging you from behind your legs and silently peeking at the mysterious human. You held Grace’s hand now, intertwining your fingers and felt relief after long. Even though there was no knowing that the man would help you two but you gave yourself comfort you weren’t alone here, not anymore.
Sarah turned and met your eyes again and whispered lowly, “Oops Mama, I think the games over! Sowwy!”
Steve’s eyes widened at that and you laughed at her innocence, feeling light. You played along with the kid, “It’s alright.” You didn’t want to play ‘Mommy’ anymore after that thinking it would offend her father but even, he chuckled, his laugh beautiful and boisterous.
Suddenly men dressed in black and armed with weapons ran about, skidding and crossing you to survey the area out. You shielded Grace once again but the father ahead of you didn’t even flinch. Noticing your unease, he came closer and put a hand on you arm, “I’m Steve and don’t worry, these are my men, the good guys.”
You nodded, not agreeing with his idea of good and bad but since you hoped he did acknowledge that he owed you one, you hoped none of these men would attack you. You introduced yourself and he nodded.
With Sarah on his hip, he started following one of his men and you followed along hoping to get to the exit. He even asked to drop you home but you refused, just wanting to get to the parking and put all these guns out of your kid’s sight. He tsked over his shoulder and you knew he would insist again later but for now he listened intently to the man he addressed as Buck.  
This Buck eyed you several times, not so discreetly, while Steve renounced the whole incident of some spies and whatnot. You closed your eyes, not wanting to eavesdrop and just wanting to relax but you could do neither right now. They were after Sarah; you had presumed right.
Sarah made grabby hands from over Steve’s shoulder while Grace slept soundly in your arms, maybe jealous of her. She pouted and then slowly began her lower lip began to tremble. A whine escaped her mouth as she started bawling. Steve stopped to shush her but she continued screeching, “I miss Mama!” and tried to get away from Steve and jump into your arms. Buck looked surprised while Steve’s eyes pleaded yours and you nodded and gave Grace to her and took Sarah in your arms, gently shushing her and patting her back. She drooled in the crook of your neck but that was nothing new and quietened down. You didn’t want to give Grace away but you couldn’t see another child so miserable, not when you had one of your own.
Steve and ‘Buck’ observed you, not saying anything so you broke the silence. “I’m sorry she confuses me with her mother, I hope she doesn’t get offended by this.”
“She’s no more.” Steve looked down and you cursed yourself for breaking the silence, make the situation more awkward and unbearable.
“I’m sorry.” Well that was better than joking about how Grace didn’t have a father either.
“Don’t be, she deserved what she got.” Steve mumbled and continued walking with ‘Buck’, lightly patting Grace and kissing her forehead.
The peck should have bothered you but you were too engrossed by his words to eavesdrop further or check on Grace. What did he mean she deserved it? You didn’t even want to think of the probability of him killing her. With all the soldiers that surrounded you, you suddenly realised he was capable of more than you thought and you felt stupid for feeling safe with him when you did. He was a leader of sorts, a person with unimaginable power and you had dived headfirst in the kind of things you should avoid at all costs. Even though you hadn't crossed him or weren't on his bad side, getting involved was a mistake.
You learnt this lesson the hard way soon enough.
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jamesbuchananbarnesslut · 4 years ago
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Knifly Dinner
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Paring: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Words: 2,967
Summary: During dinner Bucky figures out a new kink neither one of you expected to like. 
Warnings: smut, smutty, smut, kink discovery, knife kink, knife in the V, as well as P in the V, dirty talk, praise kink
Tiny Tag List: @whisperlullaby​ @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​
Notes: This is all for @whisperlullaby​ and her 700 follower challenge I love you so much, am so proud of you, and miss talking to you all the time. Either way I’m sending you all my love and an amazing knife kink discovery story. This also happens to be the longest story I’ve written yet, but that’s also no shocker as it involves one of our favorite kinks. Much love and appreciation to all of those who read, please enjoy, love, reblog, and comment! 
Master List
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You and Bucky had been together for a decent amount of time, you first met each other when the unsnapping happened. You were just trying to find another place to call home and Bucky was working with his therapist and crossing off names in his little black book. During one of his trips to cross off a name, you and he had mistakenly grabbed each other's luggage from the airport, as you both had the same bags. Although you opened your bag to find a wide assortment of men's clothes and a couple hidden weapons. Bucky opened his to find some pretty pink panties and a variety of women's clothing that surely wasn't what he packed. Thankfully there was a little tag stuck inside the bag that directed Bucky how to contact you. It wasn't the best predicament but when you and Bucky first saw each other at the coffee shop to exchange bags it was love at first sight and the rest was history.
After settling down from the events of the government putting the shield in someone else's hands and Sam being named Captain America. Bucky had bought a place for you and him in Louisiana to be closer to Sam and Sarah. Which led to a lot of time spent with the Wilson family, specifically fishing trips and family dinners. It also meant that Bucky did a lot of the cooking, not only was he better at it, but he just loved taking care of you. And you loved watching him cook the way he moved around the kitchen, how he worked with his hands and when he fed you. Which is why you were spending another night sitting at the island in your kitchen, drinking wine, and watching Bucky dice up an assortment of flavorful ingredients for his latest concoction.  
Considering this is how you and Bucky spent most of your nights it was nothing new that you were mesmerized by Bucky's hands and how he worked and moved with a knife. He was always twirling it between his fingers or delicately, slicing, cutting, or dicing up some type of food for you. It was nothing new that watching Bucky in his element turned you on. Even now just watching him you couldn't help the little pool of wetness that started to form in your panties. Or that you were already partway through your second glass of wine before he was even done cooking. It was like he was purposely putting on a show for you, cutting the food up right on the island in front of you. While he asked about your day and you about his, but you couldn't help but get wrapped up in the thoughts of what you were hoping would take place after dinner. You and Bucky had sex regularly, but every time he cooked for you, essentially taking care of you, you couldn't help but want to return the favor and take care of him.  
"Earth to Y/N, are you in there?" Bucky asks while dumping all his diced ingredients into an already sizzling pan.  
"Huh? I, uh, yeah, what's going on?" You look up sheepishly from your wine glass meeting his eye contact.  
He smirks at you, almost knowingly. "You've been real caught up in your head lately doll, what's going on with you?"  
While taking another sip of your drink you ponder whether you should be forward or play it off and ruin the surprise of a strip tease and blowjob after dinner for Bucky. Although he probably already suspects you have something planned, you always do something for him after he cooks. You decide to play it off with work being stressful, because it has been, but the slow season is about to hit so things will be easier shortly. "Just waiting for the slow season to roll in at work so I can finally catch a break," you respond.  
"Yeah, I get that honey. You've been working real hard lately and even started bringing work home, something you usually don't do. Which I'm hoping to see less of soon; but dinner should be done shortly get washed up and I'll top of your wine." He smiles at you and begins pulling the rest of his cooking out of the oven and begins plating everything while you run to the bathroom.
By the time you get back to the kitchen Bucky has everything plated and is waiting to eat with you. The rest of the dinner is smooth sailing, you power through another glass of wine, while Bucky tells you about how Sam spent thirty minutes reeling in a fish just to knock it off the line at the last-minute. In return you tell him about one of the new hires that spilled fresh coffee all over your bosses' desk and important confidential documents. By the time dinner is done and you're cleaning up the dishes, you can sense Bucky is up to something but you're not sure what. That is until you're rinsing off dishes in the sink and Bucky comes up behind you brandishing a knife at your neck. Completely catching you off guard.
"Bucky," said between gulps of air "what are you up too?"  
Pulling you in closer, he responds huskily in your ear, "now doll, I've seen how you watch my hands when I'm working. But recently I've especially noticed how you watch my hands in the kitchen when I'm using a knife."  
You can't help the little gasps that escape you with Bucky's words, he wasn't wrong, Bucky's hands were always memorizing to you. Whether he was laboring over a beautiful dinner for you, or his thick fingers were working in and out of you, it was always hot. But his hands holding a knife, and Bucky's skills with a knife, had always left you wet and wanting. Anytime he showed off those skills it always led to some form of steamy hot sex. You should have connected the pieces sooner, but it seems like Bucky beat you to the punch. Now do you own up to it and let it see how this plays out or act like he read the situation wrong?  
By the time the words come to you, you feel Bucky's confidence in the situation falter. He loosens the pressure of the knife against your neck and even begins to mutter apologies. Your words cut him off though and you fall into one of your typical submissive roles in the bedroom. "What are you sorry for Sarge? Don't you prefer when I'm more vocal with what I want in the bedroom? You must be upset I didn't speak up sooner." You state while wrigglingly further back into his arms, purposefully rubbing your ass against his crotch.  
Bucky readjusts his grip wrapping his vibranium arm tightly around you but keeping the knife loosely at your neck. "I do prefer when your vocal with me doll, so tell me what color you're on right now?"
"Green," you blurt out quickly. The dishes that were begin rinsed off in the sink completely forgotten, you just want to see where Bucky will take this.  
The knife is immediately back at your neck, pushed in enough that if you move it could nick you. "That's a good girl," he replies in a raspy voice causing the pool of wetness in your underwear to return. "Now I need you to stay still doll." He slowly drags the knife from your neck down to your shoulder blade, which sends chills throughout your body and makes goosebumps arise. From there Bucky slips the knife underneath the strap of your dress and bra, before you know it you hear the ripping of fabric, and the straps are completely cut through.
"You're doing so good for me doll," Bucky states while continues to drag the knife along your skin, starting at the shoulder of the straps he just cut. You can't help the little whimpers that leave your mouth, the combination of the knife and Bucky's words all going straight to your pussy. Bucky keeps teasing though and slowly drags the knife across your back to the other straps and cutting right through those ones as well.  
"Here comes the fun part," he chuckles. Bucky releases his hold on you just to spin you around so you're finally facing him. You meet his gaze, and his pupils are completely blown out and black, he's enjoying this as much as you are. Neither of you could have predicted adding this kink to your lists and yet here it is after a typical mundane dinner. Bucky breaks the gaze you're holding when he crouches and brings the knife to the bottom of your dress. He's meticulous in his work and cuts off every single button that's keeping you concealed. The entire process making you lightheaded and your underwear slicker with need.
Slowly working his way from the bottom of your dress up until the lingerie you're wearing for him is revealed and he can slip your dress off your arms. Which he does so immediately so he can get a better look at what you've been hiding underneath your dress. It’s a matching bra and panty set, the straps of the bra completely cut through and ruined. The set is a soft sage green covered with floral embroidered emblements, the colors complementing your skin.  
"Oh doll, did you already have something planned for me after dinner?"
You clear your throat and work out a yes while Bucky begins to run the knife along your body now that the majority if not all of your skin is exposed for him. He starts by tracing your collar bones and then dropping to follow the curves of your body. Slowly across the exposed top of your breasts, down your stomach, the cold metal leaving goosebumps in its wake. Then the knife is moved along your hips until the Bucky's worked it underneath the band of your underwear.
"You'll have to make it up to me another night, I've got new plans for us," and with that he cuts through your underwear too. It drops to the ground in pieces leaving you cold and exposed, allowing Bucky to see the glistening slick between your legs.  
"You like this though don't you doll?" Which he follows by dragging the knife back up your sternum and sliding it underneath the front of your bra so he can cut through that too.  
"Yeah, Sarge, I like this a lot," you work out in little huffs while Bucky peels the cut bra from your body.
"That's good because I'm only getting started." Bucky pushes the knife back up into your neck while dropping his lips in to kiss you. Its dirty, sloppy, and consuming. Bucky only pulls away so you both can catch a breath of air but keeps the knife close to your neck. Once you've caught your breath Bucky drops the knife and instead grabs you so he can lay you on the island where you just ate dinner. He sets you up so your feet are flat on the counter with your knees bent, giving him a perfect view of your glistening cunt.  
"Goddamn baby, I don't think I've seen you this soaked in a long time," Bucky punctuates by the grabbing the knife and sliding it along your legs now. Beginning at your ankle and working his way up towards your knee and into the apex of your thighs. Even on the cold marble countertop you can't help the full body flush that covers you. More moans and whimpers escaping from your mouth as Bucky continues to slowly drag the knife along your pussy and then along your other leg. Back down towards your knee and then to your ankle.  
"I need you to touch me Sarge," you speak out shakily.  
"But I am touching you doll," he continues to follow his path back along your leg, at the ankle, up your knee and into the apex of your thighs.
"I need more," you whine out.
"Where do you want me to touch you, be specific doll?" Bucky smirks at you.
"My pussy," you let out in huffs.  
"Do you want my hands, mouth, or the knife," he lets out calmly, as if that last option was always on the menu.  
You didn't expect the last option to leave Bucky's mouth but now that it has you can't help the deeper flush that covers your body. You can't help but think of anything else, the entire notion making you burn even hotter. You manage to stammer out, "I, uhm, Buck, I mean Sarge, please, will you use your knife to touch me."
Bucky's lets out a groan, is smirking again and then moving the knife in his hands, he puts the blade into his vibranium one and begins rubbing the handle of the blade along your pussy. "Look at you pretty little thing, always take my fingers and cock so well and now you're going to take my knife too. Going to make me cum in my pants with just teasing you honey," he rumbles out.  
After teasing you until your juices cover the handle of the blade, he moves to push it into your velvet folds. It glides in easily causing a gasp to escape your lips while Bucky pushes it in just enough that it's rubbing right against your g-spot. "Oh, that's it doll, you're gripping my knife so nicely. Want you to cover it in your juices so anytime I use it, it smells like you, and I'm reminded of this." Which he punctuates by slowly beginning to move the handle of the blade in and out of you, right against your g-spot. Your moans and whimpers now echoing through the room, while he builds a steady pace.  
"That's it doll, be a good girl and cum all over my knife and then this pretty little pussy can have my cock." Bucky states while dropping his flesh hand down to your clit and rubbing it in rough circles that match the pace that he's moving the knife's handle in and out of you. A heat slowly building throughout your body and spreading into your limbs, while your moans get louder. "Yeah, that's it, make a mess all over my knife," Bucky's words tipping you right over the edge.  
Recovering from your orgasm, you watch Bucky slowly pulls the knife from you licking some of your slick off the handle and then setting it on the opposite counter. He then begins to strip his own clothes and watches you, watching him.  
"Like what you see?" He asks while finally stepping out of his boxers and giving his cock a couple pumps.
"You know I do Sarge," you reply in a deep sultry tone.  
"Common lets take this somewhere more comfortable," he pulls you off the counter and carries you into the living room sitting down on the couch with you in his lap. What you aren't expecting is for him to pull out another knife from the couch and brandish this one at your neck as well. You knew he had weapons hidden all over the house, ever the paranoid that he is. But now that he was using them on you, it was a whole new level of hot.
"I want you to ride me doll, but while you do, I'm going to keep this knife at your neck the whole time. Meaning you better be real careful doll and take it nice and slow, that okay?"
"Yes Sarge," you let out breathily while shifting your position fully straddling him, grabbing his cock and lining it up with your entrance.  
"Such a good girl," he looks at you with amazement but keeps the knife perfectly at your neck, his other hand, held at the nape of your neck preventing any further movement, so Bucky doesn't actually cut you.  
You begin to ride him at a slow steady pace, the knife in his hands following all of your movements perfectly. Even riding Bucky at this slower pace, you can't help but feel your next orgasm already forming. A slow and steady burn starting in your core and working its way out into your limbs. You had no idea Bucky holding you at knife point would be this hot but now you can't help but think how he'll keep finding ways to incorporate it into your sex life.  
"That's it doll. Such a good girl for me, taking my cock so nicely. I know your close again already, you want to cum for me?"
"Fuck. Yes. Sarge," you work out in between gasps while working yourself up and down on Bucky's cock. The cold blade still pushed up into your neck, leaving red marks and scratches in its wake.  
"Want you to make a mess all over my cock too doll, look at you taking me so well" Bucky grunts out while your pussy tightens up around his length. The warmth in your body burning hotter as Bucky's about to talk you into your next orgasm.  
"That's it, common doll, be a good girl and cum all over Sarge's cock." Matching the pace, you've already set, Bucky begins thrusting up into you without moving the knife. His words and matched pace immediately sending you over the edge, while your moans echo throughout the room. Your sweet cunt milking Bucky's cock sending him over the edge with you. Bucky drops the knife just so he can pump his cum properly into you, pulling you tightly into him.  
Once you both catch your breath Bucky is the first to speak again, "if I knew me pulling a knife on you would make you that wet, I would have done it sooner."
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