#is this what believing in your ability to perceive reality feels like?

[tapestryundone]

constantly thinking abt the long quiet and the shifting mound and their relationship w humanity. because the two are very much not mortal and even in the what happens next ending its very ambiguous if they ever WILL be or Can be. but even still they have both felt what its like to be mortal

i feel like its vague if the entity the two used to be even percieved its own existence. the way the narrator talks about it makes it seem like the two only existed conceptually and as a result lacked a complete sense of identity, and didnt need to, and wouldnt want to. but in the same way a thought cannot be unthought, the narrator gave them a glimpse into what it felt like to be mortal and the two can never un-know it, even if it wasnt exactly the same

the long quiet in particular seems especially tied to humanity and in some aspects seems to want to BE human (which feels so potent given how decidedly Not human he is). the game tends to imply that every option you get is a thought he DOES have, and in the spaces between, the choices dont seem as influenced by a given voice, which highlights even more how much he feels conflicted on his own nature that he gets Multiple options to express discomfort with himself being a god

it just gets to me how one of the options during the fight is literally "appeal to your shared humanity". because even if the two are gods, their separation and reshaping has given them humanity that they can never un-feel. for how much the shifting mound grieves what she once was, she cannot will her humanity away. shes mourning what the two of them once was and is desperate to have it back at any cost, even though they can never be together how they once were.

even if the long quiet goes with her, theyre still apart and lack balance, because the two once just Were and werent two parts. they werent both halves, they werent two concepts, they were just one concept that happened to, by human eyes, consist of two halves. and the narrators insertion of humanity into the mix in order to separate them, separating them into concepts that humans understood, manually put into existence a struggle for equilibrium where that balance had simply Existed

but theyve already perceived what felt like reality and can never un-see it. they were separated and Need the other to feel whole and for reality to BE whole but the moment that either of them realized their own free will, the moment the two fully came to feel like people, they could never be together the same way once again

im struggling to come up with a metaphor that isnt silly but its like if you took a piece of fabric and cut it in two and made them both into shirts. youve added a piece of humanity into them and doing so cost its original form. to take them apart and try to put them back together would never get you the original, whole piece of fabric back, because theyve been completely changed by their own unique destruction and reconstruction

they were separated in a way that gave them humanity that they have such conflicting feelings on. both seem to have a deep love of humanity but vastly different ideas on what humanity needs to thrive, because its in their natures

in order to get one to kill the other the narrator let the long quiet interpret the both of them as mortal. and for a being of perception and an god thats being lied to, this became part of their limited view of the world, on top of all the other reasons that the two gained humanity. the long quiet couldnt be told what to do if he didnt have the ability to potentially act on the narrators desires, and the shifting mound could never die if the long quiet didnt believe her to be capable of death

the narrator gave the two humanity and the shifting mound is very reasonably distressed by this. because the two of them never asked for this but they cant undo it. it is her OWN subtle desire for things to be the same as they used to be, her own piece of that stagnation that also led to her experiencing humanity, that makes her so adamant during the fight. she misses the long quiet and wants to undo a change that cannot be undone in search of a constant state of being that was taken from her

and the long quiet felt so closely tied to mortality, both its existence and absence, that no matter what, he wants to aid humanity. but hes been lied to and denied autonomy to the point where he doesnt know what that entails. but he wants to be a part of it. he was given fake mortality and cant seem to figure out how he feels

the shifting mound is set in how she feels it best to aid in the existence of life. she is stagnant in her feelings because its all that feels right to her. the long quiet is ever-shifting in how he feels it best to aid in the existence of life. he is changing in his feelings because its all that feels right to him

getting to the heart of the shifting mound allows them a moment to discuss it as the closest they can get to mortals. the two care about their impact on life and what it means to be alive and what better way for the two of them to truly decide what they want to do about it, outside of the conflict thats been forced between them, than as the mortals they never were?

[katyspersonal]

It is still hard to believe.. yet at the same time, everything makes too much sense.

Ever since I saw how much he seemed to hate me and wish ill on me and be in genuine agreement that I was a danger for society for ableist reasons, I've been doubtful. Maybe I was in the wrong, after all? Maybe I did cause harm with my words, after all? Why else would someone act this way? Because being scared and perceiving me as someone harmful from how I sounded at my worst is still harm. Negative emotions sap the HP, I am aware of that. Not to mention that apparently turned out he mentioned being afraid to interact with people that interacted with ME.

But when I got crashed with the reveal that, in fact, he never saw me as a human being to BEGIN with, but only as a name in "heretics" list, everything fell back into place. I've never been happier to get back to square fucking uno. Mic was right about that type of people being just NPCs all along. He saw something many years before I did, and I was right to chase that white rabbit.

All that vitriol, all that ill will, ditching people that as much as were kind to me felt so personal. I was convinced, CONVINCED that I HAD to have done something bad to him, even if collateraly, to evoke this. And yet, apparently, it is okay in the eyes of those sorry Choirlings to treat people this way mindlessly and spread hateful fear-mongerish propaganda under guise of "awareness" without bothering to learn whether it is justified . People just... can do this shit carelessly and tell you that they do not want to know you as a person, which by effect means they don't want to know whether they were fair to you or not. Internet does something with people. At the very least, I was genuinely concerned that I might have hurt him, and it was a reasonable conclusion from how he reacted. But, no. People just throw words, actions and posts carelessly. They don't care how it effects the person or whether it would change a darn thing about the world to the better or whether the claims are ever true. Of course it "was not personal", because they don't see me as a person. Or even themselves.

"This is what queer people do" no, this is what cultists that are hostile to the "outsiders" do. And the fact that he told these words to another queer person should be even more telling. I can feel Mic laughing in my head, even if we parted the ways for months now on very negative terms. His mistake was simply in deciding to respond to those people in kind. But learning that I was correct in looking at him and thinking "this is what happens with people that "communities" grind and toss away like trash". He was a trans man and yet his own "community" denied him his own identity for failing to follow the rules and imposed ways to look at things or even at his own body and mind. This is why I do not turn to "communities": people within them are so paranoid that they start eating their own. When there is a suspicion that one of them is a bad apple, the bastards start interrogating and honestly dip into extremely private matters without any decency. And not even baring one's entire life and soul guarantees being saved. I was not guilty for understanding such a simple thing, it were my enemies who lacked common sense. And I should have never doubted my perception only because I got concerned about a single Choir boy. But no one can understand how liberating it feels for me, a person with lifelong story of being gaslighted, abused, brainwashed and manipulated to finally be confident about my perception. I am still yet to deal with anger, I have been extremely irritable and disturbed ever since that exchange. I even got into a fight at workplace. I know WHY I am so angry.... I am not mad at anyone, but hyperactive because my mental hardware is being rewritten. Erased, destroyed, and created again, but finally with a crucial change. But it should be the first step to my healing. To my independence. I don't need Mic to see things. I don't need "community" to see things. I don't need Kris, I don't need my abusive stepdad. This is what finally seeing things without anyone's help feels like, and I want to nurture and improve this ability. I've realized, at last, that I am not as stupid and confused about world and people as I always thought. The confidence in my ability to make choices. The knowledge that I have nothing to apologize for (except for being rude and hostile, and it is not damning, everyone reacts differently when scared).

But also this is why I don't want to end up hating the whole world. As long as THIS is the state of identity-based communities, there will be people that get thrown out of them for being "misfits". Identically homeless people keep increasing in numbers, and they should stay this way. Because if we were to make our own community, we'd just start yet another vicious cycle. Because humans are evil, and this evil comes through social organizing. We must walk our own ways and maybe communicate and make small friends groups at best- just like individual Hunters scattered across the game, or covenants too small to be communities. To Hell with the Choir boys, they don't deserve me shedding a single tear over them if they don't even bother to acknowledge me as an individual. DEFINITELY to Hell with Alfred and Logarius (you know who they are if you followed since summer). And also to Hell with that lunatic, even if meeting him was so, so rewarding in the end. No one deserves me humbling up and doubting myself and crying for them. No one, no one, no one....

[eamour]

don’t ever feel bad for knowing about the law but not being able to properly use it to your advantage. don’t blame nor bash yourself for having forgotten the functioning of the law and how it operates.

when neville wanted to manifest a divorce with his first wife — who he had fallen out of love with — in order to be in a relationship with the woman who he actually had feelings for, he admitted that he had no clue on how to do it. yes, he was pretty much wondering about the how. how was he gonna approach her? what was he gonna tell her? in which way could his desire be realised? he was struggling mentally, and probably emotionally as well.

so, what did he do? he completely turned his back on the outer world and abandoned himself to the law. neville practiced to fall asleep to the assumption that he was already together with the woman of his dreams and exercised this repeatedly and consistently. he remained persistent with his claim until his deepest desire materialised itself into his physical reality for him to witness.

within one week of accepting his assumption to be true in a state akin to sleep, he was ready to perceive his manifestation with his own senses. his desire appeared in a way which he didn’t even think of or believed in!

neville did not intervene or interfere with the contents of his world without. all he did was to feel his wish fulfilled, live in the end and think from his desire. in his mind, he was already experiencing what he wanted and wished for. he had faith in the unseen and trusted his imagination. and most importantly, his circumstances did not matter to him! all because he was ready to see beyond his human body and finally free himself from the limitations of his senses.

it may be difficult to look at life from a lens that doesn’t feel like it belongs to you, but neville didn’t look at his life from his body's eyes either. he looked at his life from his mind's eyes. see, the law works nonetheless. it doesn’t stop applying to you because it’s you or because you didn’t imagine "well" or long enough. the law's ability to realise your desires depends entirely on the naturalness of your feeling in regards to your desire. it’s possible to bring anything to life. if there's an ability to desire, there’s an ability to imagine. and after all, imagination creates reality.

"never blame, only resolve." — neville goddard

with love, ella.

[ghostlyferrettarot]

🦋Pick a Picture: 💎🦚You hidden talents🦚💎

•Pile 1 •Pile 2 •Pile 3

❗️This is a collective reading, take what resonates and leave the rest❗️

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🦚Masterlist🦚

🦩Pile 1: 3 of Wands, 3 of Cups and 8 of Wands.

You have a unique ability to connect with people. Although you may not recognize it at times, there is something about your energy that draws others to you. Your presence radiates a mix of maturity and softness that makes people feel at ease around you. It is as if your company alone can calm those around you, creating an environment where they feel safe to open up and share. That ability to calm others is a gift that not everyone possesses, and it is something that you should value. Many around you perceive that you have a voice that resonates strongly and can influence the lives of others. If you have ever thought about using your voice more actively, whether in the professional or personal sphere, do not hesitate to follow that impulse. Your path seems to be aligned with the idea of ​​communicating and expressing yourself, and that can take you to surprising places.

There is a special quality about you that makes you stand out when it comes to helping others. Not only are you a good listener, but you also know how to provide advice and comfort when it is most needed.

🦩Song:

🐞Pile 2: The Empress, 5 of Pentacles and 4 of Swords.

You have a unique ability to create, I feel that you can be a master manifestor. Any project that crosses your mind, any idea or work that you wish to carry out, has the potential to generate a significant impact on your life and the lives of those around you. Your ability to innovate and think differently is something that many fail to understand, but that does not matter. The essential thing is that your ideas are original and can lead you to achieve notable recognition, so do not hesitate to share them with the world. Your ideas have the power to endure over time, and I am convinced that you will be able to build a legacy of your own. The way you see things is unique, and although some may not capture the essence of your thoughts, that should not discourage you. On the contrary, it is precisely this uniqueness that sets you apart and gives you the opportunity to leave a mark on the world. Every idea that comes from you can be the start of something great, so keep going and don't hold back.

Don't limit yourself by the opinions of others; instead, focus on what you are truly passionate about and how you can bring your visions to reality.

🐞Song:

🦋Pile 3: 10 of Cups, The Sun and 2 of Wands.

You have a special gift for brightening the day of those around you; it seems like the day of others doesn't start until you appear. It may seem a bit extra, but that is the impression you leave. Your energy is contagious and you are one of those people who always looks for the positive side of things. This attitude of yours is what makes you so loved and appreciated by everyone. Many people admire your charisma and the confidence you radiate, even if sometimes you doubt it yourself. It's funny how, despite your insecurities, there are those who see you as a role model. The truth is that you have a natural charm that attracts others, and it's essential that you start recognizing it in yourself. Don't let your achievements or productivity define your worth; what really counts is the unique essence you bring to the world.

At the end of the day, what really matters is how special you are in the lives of others. In their eyes, you are a true winner, and that is not measured by material success or goals achieved. So, start believing in yourself and the positive impact you have on those around you.

🦋Song:

💎Thank you for reading and tell me if it resonated💎

[nayatarot777]

how does your family view you? • pick-a-card

*please remember that this is your family’s perception of you. it might not be how you perceive yourself.

• pile one •

overall, i see a very positive and empowering perception that your family has of you.

first of all, they know that you’re intuitive af. clairvoyant specifically. you can see through situations and people clearly. aspects of things that they themselves perhaps miss. they feel like you can’t be lied to or tricked, so for a lot of you, your family doesn’t worry about you being naive within your friendships, relationships, and life in general. you’re not easily fooled.

there’s something about your anger too. they might see you rebuild yourself after experiencing destruction in your life - especially if someone has betrayed you or fucked you over. it seems as though you use that anger to rebirth yourself into a more “upgraded” version of yourself. you learn lessons quickly and seem to not make the same mistakes again. and thanks to your increase in awareness after these tower moments, these newfound experiences are added to your internal library of knowledge for your intuition to pick up on if similar people or situations are presented to you yet again.

you know your own power, so your family sees you as the person who dares to possess dreams and aspirations for yourself that not many others in your family would have the courage to put trust into achieving. and they know that your rebirths are motivated by what you see for yourself and your life in the future. they feel like you have a very good self esteem - or at least a high level of trust in yourself and your abilities. they feel as though you have a figurative crown on your head. if your parents are very successful people (whether that’s due to their career, building their lives from little to nothing - especially if they’re immigrants and worked hard to build the life that they have) then they believe that you’re someone who will continue on their legacy of success in your own way. i’m hearing that they don’t worry about where you’re gonna end up in life because the trust in yourself puts trust in them that you’ll build a legacy of your own.

they also see you as very head-strong. someone who controls and leads your life in whatever way you want to. you don’t seem to take no for an answer, nor pause your journey in the face of obstacles. there’s a lot of drive that you have when it comes to determining what your world looks like according to your vision. there’s something untameable about you. almost like you don’t listen to anyone. you trust that you know what’s best for you so you’re the ruler of your own kingdom with your clear vision.

despite all of your seemingly extravagant or unconventional dreams, your family believes that you’re extremely grounded in reality. you have a great balance of living within your internal world as well as the physical world. in stressful moments of life, you can balance out your emotions and view things practically. you have a good head on your shoulders and you listen to what comes from your heart space. what you actually feel in all of its authenticity and honesty.

your family also believes that you’re extremely body confident. whether this is because you take care of your body through exercise and eating well, or because you dress however the fuck you want to. the way that you dress could be a style that shows off your body for a lot of you. your family sees your self love and your self worth through this.

significant numbers: 12, 13, 28, 24, 15, 21

astrological placements/aspects: pisces/neptune, scorpio/pluto, aries/mars, taurus/venus

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• pile two •

your family views you as someone who has already undergone or who is undergoing some type of powerful personal growth within yourself. this could be related to listening to yourself and your own intuition. your family may feel like you feel as though you can’t trust them, despite trying to for so long. but for some of you, they can tell that you’ve finally decided to listen to yourself and see them for who they truly are. they can see sadness in your eyes or in your face whenever they look at you. there’s a feeling of betrayal here - from them towards you - that they recognise.

they view you as someone who feels detached from them. they could try to show you love but they can tell that you feel uncomfortable whenever they do. they’d describe the familial “love” between you and them as strange or unfamiliar to you. this “love” could’ve come after they realised that you were growing more distant from them as a last attempt at keeping you close to them. but again, they know that you know the truth about them and so the feeling of awkwardness during these attempts at trying to show affection towards you is mutually felt. they feel like you don’t want their love. like you’d rather just be left alone by them. these family members may be very energetically draining and this is how you protect your energy from them. and there’s also a feeling of this love being forced. not genuine. it’s fake or forced out of them for a lot of you and you can see that.

they might also be aware of some body image issues that you have. or this might just be their perception of you - especially if you have any body modifications like tattoos and piercings that they don’t approve of. they view this as “mutilation” of your body. i’m also seeing them view you as someone who’s very protective over your body with the clothing that you wear. based on the way that you completely cover up or your oversized clothing. so if you do have any body image issues, they might’ve picked up on them based on that observation. at least you dress like this around them. you might be uncomfortable wearing certain things around your family because they always have some comments to make about your body. but i am sensing some shame about your body for some of you. i’m seeing that for a lot of you, your family feels like you don’t treat your body like a temple. if these are the same people who’d make negative, nitpicking comments about your body then idk wtf they expect. that might’ve been their goal tbh (for those of you with malignant ass, jealous ass family members who want you to feel like shit about the way that you look).

for others of you, it’s the opposite and your family feels like you dress “too revealingly” in public or maybe online in your social media posts. for a minority of you, your family knows about your online sex work (or this is an assumption that they’ve made about you). but for some of you, there’s something about your family feeling like you’re too naked in the public eye. this could also be metaphorical, meaning that your family may feel like you’re well-known by people but i don’t get a good energy from this (from their perspective anyway). they may feel like you’re known for something that’s not a positive thing to be known for. or like you’re just vulnerable in the public eye.

they view you as someone who takes the time to take steps forward in your life. and they may feel like you’re waiting on divine timing to make moves in your life. but some of your family members view this as you just being lost and “behind” in life in some way. like your head is just up in the clouds and like you don’t really know where you’re headed in life. they don’t understand moving forward when you feel like you should be moving.

they know that you have a lot of childhood trauma to unpack. and they feel like your heart is blocked or locked because of it. for some of you, your family would like to figure out how to unlock it but i feel like they feel as though there’s not much that they can do. you may have been a very angry child, and i feel like you’re not necessarily an angry person now but your family can tell that you’re suppressing a lot. and that in order to unlock your heart (your feelings), you’re going to have to let out a lot of anger and resentment first.

significant numbers: 41, 27, 2, 18, 24, 35

astrological placements/aspects: chiron, venus in scorpio/8th house, venus conjunct chiron (particularly in the 4th house/conjunct the ic), taurus, lilith in taurus/2nd house, aquarius/uranus, lilith in 11th house/aquarius, pisces/neptune, mercury in pisces, chiron in 4th house, chiron in 5th house, aries/mars in 5th house, sun in aries, pluto in 1st house, scorpio rising, chiron in aries, chiron aspect mars (mainly conjunct)

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• pile three •

your family view you as someone who prefers to be alone. even if you know that there are people around you who love and care for you, you still prefer to be by yourself. and some of them can tell that it’s because you only feel comfortable enough to be vulnerable with yourself.

they also might view you as quite messy too, whether this is your bedroom or your home in general. but there’s a lack of energy that they witness you having that’s the root cause of this.

despite all of this, they view you as someone who’s very accepting of your solitude that you use for the sake of finding peace. you could be very meditative or very peaceful by yourself within your own energy. and they feel as though, whenever they bother you in your alone time, you become very defensive and repel them. some of you may struggle with depression, but it’s not depression that you want help with. not from them at least.

this energy is vastly different to how they viewed you before. maybe compared to when you were a child. because there was some type of sudden shift in your energy towards them that resulted in you being very isolated and repellent towards them.

they either feel like they don’t know you after this shift or they feel like you don’t really know yourself. someone in your family in particular feels like you’re forgetting who you are who where you came from. maybe even who you came from. they feel like you wear a mask around them. as if there’s always a detachment between you and them. kind of similar to pile two.

i’m getting a lot of “black sheep” energy from you guys. like your family just doesn’t understand you but they know that you’re not really interested in being involved with family gatherings or interactions. if you believe that they do know that you know who you are very well, they view you as someone who hides who you truly are from them. and if you’ve always been singled out or you’ve just always felt different to everyone around you then it makes sense.

they view you as someone who’s at peace with yourself though. just not at peace when being around them. this could make them deeply sad and upset as there’s an energy of them not being able to quite pinpoint why this is the way it is. unlike in pile two. pile two’s family we’re outwardly toxic. but for you guys, i feel like your family just don’t understand you. maybe they never really tried to make an effort to. but whatever the culprit of the reasons behind your familial connections, there are a lot of unknown things that your family feels like they don’t know or understand about you.

significant numbers: 17, 9, 17, 6, 22, 10 - look up the angel number 1717 for an extra message

astrological placements/aspects: pisces, leo, pluto in 5th house, (heavy) scorpio, lilith in 4th house, pluto in 4th house, strong sun-pluto aspects, connection between cancer + scorpio/pluto placements

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[elysiansparadise]

hii i adoreee your writing style. you’re truly one of my favourite astrologers 🥹 i was wondering about your interpretation on sun in 10h? i hope you have a lovely day 🥹💗

Hello love, thank you so much for your words. 💗

Sun in the 10th house

These natives radiate a lot of light, energy and power, they tend to be the focus of attention in many situations even if they do not look for it, they also tend to be greatly admired either for some talent, a quality of their physique or for their personality. Many people tend to think that they are somewhat unapproachable or perceive them as somewhat distant/focused on their own issues, but the reality is that they can be very kind. They are very hard-working, ambitious people and they try to make it clear that they are sure of their value as a person, their abilities and potential. What people sometimes don't see is that these natives also tend to doubt these aspects of themselves, but they try not to show it to other people. They can enjoy a good reputation and can even gain a lot of prestige through their career, they are usually well regarded by people. If Pluto or Neptune make tense aspects to the Sun, the native is likely to attract people who become obsessed with them or who envy them. They tend to be very dedicated to meeting their goals and can set high standards for themselves, they can put a lot of pressure on themselves to do something productive, not waste time or do things well. They are very upright and honest people who like to do the right thing and can be a role model for many people, since it is easy for them to inspire and motivate others. There is a sunshine quality in them, which makes them brighten or improve the vibes.

This placement favors the popularity and good reception of people, especially bosses, people with more experience or older people, who will see a lot of potential in the native and will motivate them. They tend to be people with a lot of charisma and a unique sense of humor, they can please others easily. Some of them may come across as sassy, ​​very dominant and self-centered [especially if it’s aspecting Mars] but they are people whose hearts overflow with generosity and thoughtfulness. These people have the ability to give the impression they intend to give, they show themselves authentically but still reserving some things for themselves. There are many people who may believe they know the native perfectly, but the reality is that they only scratch the surface. They are very independent people since they are young, because life has taught them to take care of themselves, and many of them, although independent and fierce when it comes to facing the turbulence of life, when they love a lot they can bring out this protective side and warmth. Deep down they have the desire to be supported and protected.

These natives opt for long-term plans, relationships or projects, and they hate ephemeral things that waste their time, as it is something they deeply value. Despite their disciplined and responsible nature, they like to make their work or tasks fun. Some of them were able to grow up with the idea that only by achieving things or doing something can they feel that they are worth it, but one of their lessons in this life is to become aware that by the mere fact of existing they deserve to be loved and respected. The relationship with the father can be complex, because being in this house tells us of two extremes, or a supportive father who, although not very expressive, was attentive to them, we also have a possible father who is emotionally and/or physically absent or who focused a lot in his work and responsibilities. These natives are very trustworthy people who like to be there for those they love in times of crisis, they support unconditionally, they do not easily give up and they do not hesitate once they make a decision.

[libraincarnate]

astrology notes: 9 🐰𖤣𖥧.𖡼.⚘

quick note: i'm absolutely not an astrologer. these are just a collection of some observations, thoughts, theories, and personal experiences. with that being said, i'm still learning along the way & i may come back to edit this post to make corrections. above all this is just for fun. lastly, keep in mind that i’m not reading your birth chart and i know nothing about you. these are just some possibilities that may or may not apply to you. enjoy!

𓍊𓋼𓍊 i feel like aries & sag mars are the types to do extreme sports like skateboarding, surfing, mountain climbing, snowboarding, bungee jumping, bmx, etc.

𓋼𓍊 moon conjunct/trine/sextile neptune: those with these aspects may be good actors or have some of the qualities & abilities needed for good acting. i feel like they know how to fake cry. they could purposely & easily evoke a memory or experience that triggers an emotional response. there’s this ability to manipulate their feelings but also the feelings of others. the ability to couple their emotional intelligence & creativity and combine them with reality & illusion. they make it believable. with that being said they can also be good liars too. and remember neptune is associated with tv/film.

^ moon-mercury aspects is another aspect that i feel is beneficial for acting because actors also needs to convey emotion with their words & it needs to sound convincing. it should make sense and be in accord with their facial and physical expressions, it needs to fit the script. especially for voice acting.

𓍊𓋼𓍊 geminis & virgos: do yourself a favor and tidy up the notes in your notes app. it’ll declutter your mind, phone, and to-do list lol. plus it may be fun for the virgos who like to organize. perhaps gemini too. i wouldn’t say gems like to organize and arrange things like virgo but it may be mentally stimulating for them kind of like a puzzle, figuring where to put what.

𓋼𓍊 sag, capricorn, aries, scorpio, and aquarius are some of the most straightforward and direct individuals. they’re honest and if they hold back their words then it’s for your sake. may have an “it’s not how you say it but it’s what you say that matters” mindset. they may be perceived as harsh or as assholes because of how candid they can be. plus they’re super sarcastic.

𓍊𓋼𓍊 your big 3 making harsh aspects to each other: hard to be yourself or accept yourself for who you are. doesn’t mean you don’t like yourself or your personality but beneath it all there may be a part of you that finds it difficult to feel comfortable with the real you as a whole.

this doesn’t need to be discouraging. having difficult placements, aspects, etc. doesn’t equal inaction on your part. you still have control over yourself & you can make changes, improvements. sort out your strengths/weaknesses according to your big 3 & try finding a balance between them, figuring out ways to make them work together. take the difficulties/challenges & turn then into a greater sense of confidence and personal power.

𓋼𓍊 taurus/libra absolutely hate being rushed but libras are also big on manners so they respect punctuality.

𓍊𓋼𓍊 moon in the 10th house: may be in a position where you explain/express your feelings to the public. whether it be as an artist or maybe you have a large following on social media, you connect to your followers on an emotional level, or you’re just open with your emotions & speak about it publicly. of course some moon signs are more reserved but if you have a gemini moon or moon at 3°, 15°, or 27° you might end up saying more than you’d like.

𓋼𓍊 venus-jupiter aspects: these natives probably gamble or make bets often. playing the lottery, watching/playing poker, betting on sports, going to the casino, etc. both venus & jupiter are associated with wealth, jupiter with favorable opportunities & expansion, and venus (more so taurus) is associated with monetary possessions.

𓍊𓋼𓍊 7th house ruler in the 12th house: your lover, future spouse, enemies, or people you should/shouldn’t connect with may be revealed to you in your dreams.

𓋼𓍊 if sun-moon aspects can reveal things about your parents’ relationship (like sun square moon may indicate divorce, incompatibility, etc.), mercury-venus/mars aspects may reveal things about your relationship with your siblings.

the first house that mercury rules is the 3rd house, and the 3rd house is associated with siblings.

venus represents females and feminine relationships, or the sister in this case.

mars represents males and masculine relationships, or the brother in this case.

no or few aspects between mercury-venus/mars may behave like an empty third house meaning there isn’t really much of a relationship or not a strong one. it may not be a prominent relationship in your life. you guys may be cool with each other and have each other's backs but there isn’t that close sibling bond. of course if you have 3rd house placements but no or few mercury-venus/mars aspects, or vice versa, results vary & there may be a relationship.

harmonious aspects = possibly/likely a harmonious relationship with your sibling(s).

disharmonious aspects = possibly/likely a disharmonious relationship with your sibling(s).

a conjunction may go either way.

𓍊𓋼𓍊 12th house placements may belittle their suffering and traumatic experiences. they may be detached from those experiences even though they have clearly affected them and their lives. plus, with the 12th house being mysterious there is a lack of understanding. there’s a lack of structure. things feel amorphous & difficult to grasp so it’s pushed aside to the subconscious. for these reasons it may be difficult for them to thoroughly heal from those experiences. but the healing is definitely possible & i wish that for all of you.

𓋼𓍊 retrograde planets in your birth chart: the house in which those retrograde planets fall may show you the things or areas of life you struggle with accepting. you might not want to do things that are related to the themes of that house, they may make you uncomfortable. there’s friction, a bit of fear, reluctance, or insecurity.

for example,

saturn retrograde in the 5th house - difficulty accepting pleasure and failure, extra pressure to be productive instead of having fun, uncomfortable with expressing yourself, maybe you don’t get a long with children well and don’t want any of your own.

neptune retrograde in the 1st house - a lack of self-awareness, confusion about who you are, difficulty accepting the way you look, uncomfortable with introspection. fear of the new, shying away from leadership positions or taking initiative.

pluto retrograde in the 12th house - a fear of the unknown or the dark, difficulty accepting your dark side, your past & obsessing over it, discomfort in solitude, resisting & battling restriction.

mercury retrograde in the 10th house - fear of public speaking/stage fright, confusion regarding your career, difficulty executing your plans, discomfort with accepting fame or popularity, insecure with making long-term goals, constantly making changes, shunning responsibility.

mars retrograde in the 7th house - difficulty establishing relationships, fear of commitment, shying away from marriage, a lack of confidence when connecting to others, discomfort with being vulnerable.

𓍊𓋼𓍊 your moon persona chart can give you a deeper understanding of how you navigate your emotions & how you handle emotions in general, not just yours. also, you may relate to the placement of chiron in your moon persona chart more than its placement in your natal chart. it can reveal another layer of some of your deepest emotional wounds. you might look at this chart and think "oh, that makes sense."

𓋼𓍊 jupiter retrograde in the 8th house (synastry): 8th house person may find the jupiter person untrustworthy. stolen opportunity, theft in general, ruining credit, negatively affecting finances. jupiter person may be a source of pain & suffering to the 8th house person.

𓍊𓋼𓍊 exposing my fellow air signs here: when it comes to air signs geminis have been called liars/2 faced, libras have been called a gossip/people pleaser, aquarius have been said to have a god complex.

but when is someone gunna talk about how aquarius also can play victim and they always have an excuse??? if gems are good at lying on the spot, aquarius is good at making excuses. lol if scorpios (not an air sign, i know) would rather die than say sorry, aquarius would rather die than accept blame. surely if there’s a god complex then one of the greatest offenses to an aquarius is being accused of some wrong doing, pointing out their flaws. after all, how can a god commit error or be flawed?

libras can lowkey be all bark and no bite. they can talk about you behind your back but they also tend to avoid confrontation.

& because geminis are so curious they can be so damn nosy it’s unbelievable lmfao

𓋼𓍊 leo has great leadership qualities and they know how to use those qualities to guide themselves. they have a good sense of direction, they attract opportunity like a magnet but they also know how to create it too. they let no opportunity go to waste and they know how to maximize the opportunities that are available to them.

𓍊𓋼𓍊 i've seen some astro observations say that virgos tend to really like cats. but how many of you virgos have some kind of bird as one of your favorite animals? it's a pattern i've been starting to notice an i'd like further confirmation. 

if you read this until the end i hope you enjoyed it & thank you so much for reading. ♥︎♥︎♥︎, those hearts are for you.

[batboyblog]

Interesting thing to consider regarding our situation from Magdi Jacobs. She’s been fairly levelheaded so far about all this. The Pandemic really did change us all and how we perceive things.

The constant stressful vigilance we all needed during the pandemic is still in effect from that era, and that’s why there’s such a disconnect between what we see and feel as true:

https://x.com/magi_jay/status/1812531377184653581?s=46&t=9ilK5pqP73XDblTtTbb4Qg

I don't disagree with her, and I know for a fact she also agrees with what I have to say here:

Covid is part of it, maybe it is its own thing, maybe it super charged something that had been happening in slow-mo before

but I think algorithmic social media is breaking all our brains and Covid locked SO many of us inside with it for a year and a half or so where our only "human" contact was through social media and that was NOT helpful

There's lots of studies about social media and anxiety and depression, we know algorithms intentionally put stories/posts that upset you into your feed, we know that social media causes negative polarization.

speaking just of my own experience on twitter over the last two weeks it really challenges your sense of reality, twitter very quickly forms a group think about a current event and it becomes overwhelming, also it destroys any sense of time and prospective, so nothing is allowed to just be bad it has to be THE WORST THING EVER! and from the debate and now Trump's fist pump after getting shot at everything is NOW! the election is not 4 months away with all the events that will take over the news, people are voting just this second and only based on this news story rn! AAHHHH!!! !

by its short form nature twitter makes it feel as if people are having a conversation with you, but your ability to reply and question their statements is limited and I think that makes for extreme anxiety if the group think challenges your understanding of events/reality. So Joe Biden had a bad debate night, sounded bad, looked bad, he was a sick, jet lagged, overworked, old man and looked and sounded like all of that. Oh well, but the group think quickly shifted to "this is the worst thing ever, he clearly has dementia!" and you were bombarded by that over and over, in more and more shrill and condescending tones. And it became very stress inducing because people were seeing something you didn't see and insisting "don't believe your eyes and ears! believe my hot takes!" and you felt like you were losing your mind.

This is one current event but this happens on social media all the time, twitter is bad, TikTok is worse.

I also think for "younger" (under 40?) people raised on reality TV, and more so instagram, Facebook, now TikTok picture and video based social media there's a, life as reality TV show quality, an unspoken performance and need to make our lives seem perfect for an unseen (and not real) audience, and also to be seen as having the right views, but living in quick sand where liking or using anything could become a problem at any point and having to keep up endlessly. I also think this is intensely anxiety producing and also just debilitating, I don't think you can DO anything good in the world with that mindset

final thought: I've said for awhile I think why you see so many people declaring the economy is bad, regularly saying its historically, Great Depression levels bad, when it is in fact really good, as near to full employment as we've ever had lots of great economic indicators is left over Covid trauma.

We all went through a scary, sad, upsetting time in our lives. But because we ALL did if nothing happened to you particularly, you didn't get hospitalized, don't have long Covid, no one you're close with died and you couldn't be there for them, it might feel like "nothing" happened. So people are reaching for a "logical" reason for that edgy, sad, nervous, upset, unhappy feeling they can't get rid of. Normally that comes from economic anxiety, fear of not having enough money, or losing a job etc. So many people are reporting that they think the national economy is terrible while saying they think they themselves are doing well, that their local or state economy (that they see an interact with) is doing good, while the nation is doing bad, somehow. People are spending like they're doing well as well, never had it so good, never felt so bad.

I suspect its because we're all still dealing with Covid feelings, and thanks to social media, the death of common spaces, political radicalization, we never really came together and drew a line under Covid, it just kinda sputtered out and we slowly went back to our lives like nothing happened.

[techramonic]

Anger is Humanity: An Analysis on Andre Kriegman

Disclaimer: This analysis is limited only to commentary and analysis as a means to reflect and understand the characters and the internal and external factors that affect their decisions and actions, this is true rationality. Just like all of my posts, I am detached from the media I write about and solely focus on the characters to understand their backgrounds and psychology, for others to gain insight. There is no room for me to romanticize anything I write because I am only here to explain in my understanding. Thank you.

Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance.

There are five stages of grief—yet some find themselves perpetually stuck and fixated on the second. It is a never-ending loop due to the fear of experiencing discomfort once the light is found; it is the fear of change, the bargaining of reality, the depression in the recurrence, and the acceptance that misfortune runs in your veins. One is not born with misfortune but rather handed with it.

THE SUPEREGO. A concept based on the Freudian principles of psychoanalysis, which generally develops through the internalization of values and norms given by primary groups (family and society). If members of these groups are either overly strict and abusive or lacking guidance, poor superego is molded. The superego controls the id's basic desires by using the ego, relying on internalized moral ideals. If the superego is underdeveloped, then there is an impairment in moral reasoning and the ability to distinguish what is morally just and unjust.  Furthermore, factors such as abusive environments also play a role in hindering normal superego development. Negative consequences are also brought by exposure to violence or alienation.

With this, we view Andre Kriegman in a new light. 

His behavior might be the result of an imbalance where his id's destructive desires aren't properly controlled by a strong superego. Freud has also noted various defense mechanisms the ego uses to handle conflicts between the id, superego, and external reality. If Andre's superego isn't functioning well, he might depend on unhealthy defense mechanisms like projection and blaming others for his indecent thoughts or rationalization by justifying his harmful behavior with logical reasoning.

Anger does not come from evil, but it comes from the mistreatment you receive.

It is the pain inflicted on you, the misfortune that leads you to believe that there is no possibility of ever finding the room to grow and move on. The reason why Andre is so fixated on hatred and anger is that it is a defense mechanism born out of the tragic reality that he has been and is hurt. It is the trauma response that begs to cling on you because you fear that in change, more misfortune will arise.

Anger—that is Andre Kriegman. In a world where you have constantly been alienated, you feel less human. You are not perceived, therefore, you do not exist. You are stripped away from whatever humanity you have, because to be a human, you must exist. You are a mere entity, an omnipresent being that is everywhere yet nowhere, all at once. Forced to watch a crowd interact, fearing and knowing you are so easy to be disregarded. You try to imitate them when interacting to be deemed more human, yet alas, all subside suddenly when you are deemed as a deviant. You are isolated, believed to be nothing, and therefore, gone. 

Anger sprouts from injustice. This is the rationality in anger—even how disproportionate it feels, like how Andre feels his anger. It is rooted in the lack of good treatment. The hate you feel is disproportionate as if your body begs to regurgitate all the hate you have and project it to anyone else—your family, your peers, and even yourself. You have this strong want to let others feel the pain you feel and bear, simply because this is the part of you that yearns and begs to be seen. To be understood, to be empathized with, to feel human, to be human.

To be treated as you should've been treated—well.

Anger is human. It is a part of humanity itself. Yet, as true as it can be, you can never heal with the same thing that caused it. Pain does not heal pain and anger does not heal anger, that is reality.

Andre Kriegman is anger, he is a reflection of humanity itself and the humanity he was shown. Humanity is anger.

[omniverseexplorer]

Self Concept: The Ultimate Foundation to Everything

If you want an easy life, reality shifting, and manifestation journey I definitely recommend everyone to work on your self concept. While it is true that it isn't necessary to have a good self concept in order to manifest, dedicating time and energy on your self concept definitely guarantees you an easier time with everything surrounding your life. Self concept isn't only about feeling like a bad bitch, although it is a part of it, it dictates every single aspect of your life. Everything and everyone is you pushed out, which means that everything stems from yourself. As Neville Goddard once said: "Change your conception of yourself and you will automatically change the world in which you live. Do not try to change people; they are only messengers telling you who you are. Revalue yourself and they will confirm the change."

Having a good self concept is about knowing that you are the creator of your reality, and having absolute confidence within your manifestation and reality shifting abilities. Everything and everyone else is simply a reaction on how you perceive yourself, as either the creator of your reality, or the victim of your reality. You are the operant power of your reality, the sooner you understand this the easier your life, manifestation, and reality shifting journey it will be. When you have a good self concept, you also have full faith and trust that imagination/consciousness/the 4D (aka the mind) is what creates your reality, and is the only real reality. The 3D is an illusion that simply reflects your 4D reality. You stop seeking confirmation from outer sources of the 3D and questioning where your desires are. You'd simply return to your inner world of your imagination for confirmation that you already have your desires/are at your DR. You know that creation is finished, it is done, there's nothing else you need to do as you already have your desire/are at your DR right now. Time isn't real, everything and anything you can think of already exists in your 4D/imagination/consciousness. All you need to do is give it to yourself in your imagination. Manifestation and reality shifting is always instant, you already have your desire/are at your DR the moment you want it. Another thing that happens when you have a good self concept, is you stop putting other people and methods (including the void state) on a pedestal, you put yourself on the pedestal. After all, if you knew you were the creator of your reality, why would you question what method to use to manifest or reality shift? In regards to the void state, it is simply another method within you, it's not an outer source that you need to reach or achieve. You are the creator who ultimately gives the void state the power, not the other way around. With a good self concept, you would understand this and not put importance on the void state and focus on fulfilling yourself in your imagination, the only real reality within you where you already have your desires/are at your DR right now. You would also never take no for an answer, and be brazenly impudent that you have your desires/are at your DR right now, no matter what the 3D shows you.

In my opinion, states and self concept go hand in hand. When you have a good self concept, you instantly shift to the state of the wish fulfilled effortlessly and stay there. The state of the wish fulfilled is where you know you have your desires/are at your DR so there's nothing else you need to do to achieve it. Sounds familiar with having a good self concept?

In order to cultivate a good self concept, there are different things you can do. You can create your own subliminal with affirmations focused on having a good self concept, such as being the creator of your reality, a master manifestor/master reality shifter, knowing/believing/having faith in your manifestation/shifting abilities as the creator of your reality, etc. @mysticbewitched has a good post on how to create your own subliminal. You can also affirm to yourself that you are the creator/God/operant power of your reality and have a perfect self concept. You can also visualise yourself having a good self concept however that would look like to you. You can also simply decide and feel (accept) that you have a perfect self concept, and are the creator of your reality. Simply bask in the acceptance that you are the creator of your reality. It doesn't need to be for minutes it can just be a few seconds of the quiet inner knowing that you are the creator of your reality. How do you feel afterwards? Relieved? Happy? Content? Nothing? All of these feelings are natural. You can use SATS or the lullaby method for a perfect self concept too. Then, persist no matter what. Persist on listening to your subliminal, affirming, visualising, or simply feeling as much as you want to. It's okay and normal to struggle with belief, but this is why persistence is so important. Persistence no matter what guarantees your success and starts to build the faith, acceptance, and knowing within yourself that you are the creator of your reality and confidence within your manifestation/reality shifting abilities.

[celestetarot]

What about you scares other people

Hey! Welcome to this pick a card, remember to take what resonates and leave what doesn't as this reading is for several people.

Pile 1 - Seven of Wands

You have a fierce and competitive spirit that may intimidate others. You are not one to back down from a challenge or shy away from confrontation, which can make people feel uneasy around you. Your determination and refusal to compromise on your values can come across as stubbornness to some, making them feel like they cannot reason with you. Furthermore, you may be seen as a threat to others who feel like you are encroaching on their territory. Your ambitions and willingness to take risks can be perceived as a challenge to others who are comfortable with the status quo. They may feel like you are trying to take their place or disrupt the balance, which can make them feel threatened and defensive. Overall, you are someone who is not afraid to assert yourself and fight for what you believe in, but this can also come at a cost of making others feel uneasy or challenged.

Pile 2 - Six of Cups

Others may find you naive or overly sentimental, which can make them question your judgment or ability to handle challenging situations. You may have a tendency to look back to the past or romanticize it, which can make it difficult for others to relate to you on a practical level. Some may see you as being too idealistic or out of touch with reality, which can be a source of discomfort or unease. Additionally, you may be perceived as emotionally needy or clingy by others. You may have a strong desire for emotional connections and a fear of being alone, which can come across as being too dependent on others. This can be intimidating or uncomfortable for some people, who may feel like they are being suffocated by your need for attention and affection. While your desire for emotional intimacy is understandable, it's important to be aware of how it may be perceived by others and find a healthy balance that respects their boundaries.

Pile 3 - King of Wands

Others may find you intimidating or overwhelming due to your strong leadership qualities and assertive nature. You have a natural ability to inspire and motivate others, but this can also come across as being domineering or controlling. Your confidence and passion for your goals may make others feel like they are not up to your standards or that they cannot keep up with your pace. Furthermore, you may be perceived as reckless or impulsive by others. Your tendency to take risks and act on your instincts without much consideration for consequences can be unsettling for some, who may feel like you are not being responsible or taking their concerns into account.

[imonlyanangel]

🪷 Manifesting Success 🪷

The most recent thing I manifested was self confidence! In this post I'll go over what worked for me.

I've successfully manifested several things in the past, but not nearly at the speed I would've liked to. There were months and months without success. I started to consider why- was I focusing on the 3D too much?? Was I engaging with negative, doubtful thoughts, or believing negative comments from others? How was my trust in myself?

Sure, sometimes I focus too much on the 3D, but I always catch myself. I've had some doubtful intrusive thoughts, but I always catch myself. I've over consumed at times, but I always catch myself. I'm human, and I'm still fairly new to learning how to manifest. None of these slip ups are a big deal! None of them can really affect my ability to manifest unless I allow them to. Unless I assume that they do.

The real reason I was struggling to manifest was this: I had a fear of being seen. A fear of being myself where others could see. A fear of succeeding in front of others. How can I successfully manifest if I'm afraid of success? How can I bring my reality into light if I only feel safe in the dark?

Self-confidence has been a struggle for me nearly my entire life. I've worked on improving it, but there was little progress over the course of my life. I didn't talk to people, or share my thoughts with family. I couldn't make decisions. I couldn't just be without being scared I was doing it wrong.

When I realized that this pervasive fear was keeping me from manifesting my desires, I made a decision. I wasn't going to work on manifesting anything else until I successfully manifested confidence in myself.

I tore a scrap of paper from my bedside notebook and wrote down an affirmation to stick under my pillow. All I wrote was: I always feel amazing about myself- I am overflowing with confidence. <3 I had read that the pillow method takes 7-10 days at most to manifest your desires. I wrote this down on the other side of the paper, and decided that it wouldn't take me more than a week to manifest it.

Before I fell asleep each night, I recited the affirmation in my mind. Some nights I only did it once, sometimes 2-3x. I imagined feeling like a pillar. Feeling upright, tall, visible, and strong. I imagined the heaviness and tension that came with being seen disappearing. I imagined feeling amazing about myself, or how it would feel to be confident all the time. I did this for 7 days in a row.

It didn't take me 7 days to notice a change!! The first morning I woke up after doing that was different. I was different. I went after what I wanted that day with no regard for whether or not I was being perceived. Since I started I've noticed many changes in behavior that have almost all felt natural to me. Sometimes I got nervous, but I had the confidence in myself to push through it.

Instead of shying away from looking at my face or my body in the mirror, I smile genuinely every time I see myself. Sometimes I catch myself thinking "wow, I am so f*cking pretty!" Now I intentionally make a comment about my confidence or my beauty every time I look in a mirror while washing my hands. I'm so confident. I feel amazing about myself today. I love the way I look. Complimenting myself in the mirror worked wonders and I recommend it 100%!!

Changes since I started manifesting confidence:

Engaged in my hobbies in front of others

Deep cleaned my room

Wore what I wanted

Voiced my opinion in family discussion

Decided to do a social media fast for a week

Made purchases to start a hobby I've always wanted to try (and started said hobby)

Had a difficult conversation with my mom that I was avoiding

Answered a phone call from a girl I've hardly ever spoken to, and we enjoyed talking for over an hour

Started decorating my room

Went out to eat (at a buffet) and chatted with a relative that I am not familiar with

This post! Whether anonymous or public, I've never posted or commented on social media till now, because I was too nervous.

All of these things are huge compared to where I was at two weeks ago. Some, maybe all of these things, would be small to others. But to me, especially with consideration for my neurotype and mental health, these are big steps of progress.

Am I the most confident, outspoken, assertive woman in the world? Not yet. But I improved so much in just a week. My sister noticed I was in a better mood every morning since the day I started. My mom has been complimenting me more often because of the difference in my countenance. My family noticed behavioral changes within 2 days.

I've been happy, and so much more confident. I have had more enthusiasm for life and for growth. And it doesn't take me more than 5 minutes a night. I will continue using this method of manifesting! I've already started a new affirmation.

XOXO,

Evangeline

[eamour]

daydreaming and imagining

when it comes to manifesting, people like to either daydream or imagine their desires which does sound like pretty much the same. nevertheless — it's not. daydreaming does not equal imagining, vice versa.

daydreaming

meaning · thinking of your desire

to daydream replaces the term "thinking of your desire". when you are daydreaming, you occupy a state of mind where you view yourself as well as your desire separated from each other. you could also say that you only pass through your desired state without truly embodying it and end up going back to your old dwelling state (wavering). you don't claim to have your desire, nor do you declare yourself to be in possession of it. you feel distant to it, almost as if it's impossible, unrealistic or illogical to achieve. you are desiring, aware of wanting your desire, craving and longing for the feeling, making you experience the lack of it. you feel uneasy about how your current reality looks like as you are waiting for some sort of movement or shift. you are dissatisfied about the present moment and view your manifestation as a target you need to aim for, perceiving it as a goal to attain. internally, you know that your desire hasn't been realised yet and wonder how it could possibly materialise. you analyse and examine your outer world a lot, judging it by its looks. you often ask yourself if your desires are ever gonna unfold. thus, you rely on the evidence of your senses, using the 3D as a tool to validate you. by waiting for its confirmation that you ask for so desperately, you automatically assign meaning and also power to the outer world. you let the physical world determine and dictate your mental world. by doing so, you give away control, but still continue to feel responsible and guilty. you repeatedly spiral, wondering what you could be doing wrong, not having full faith or trust in yourself. you don't quite believe in yourself and tend to give in. you endure the 3D as best as you can but often times, you consider your desire to be out of reach. you dream of the mere possibility and depend on the next moment you feel a motivational boost. frequently, you start to doubt, feeling uncertain and unsure about your ability to manifest. you find yourself feeling incapable and scare away from seemingly "big" wishes and wants. you feel needy, irritated and confused. you fight feeling resistant or pressured towards how you want your life to be like. you are afraid that you might never manifest your desired life.

imagining

meaning · thinking from your desire

to imagine can be used as a synonym for "thinking from your desire". as the term says, when you imagine your desires, you think from the point of view where you have them already. you experience them and live life from having whatever it is that you desire. you occupy the state of your wish being fulfilled, knowing and accepting that what you want already exists within you. you understand that nothing can exist outside of you and that life happens from you, so you trust yourself, believe in your capabilities and have faith in the law. you feel calm, confident and content as you are fulfilling your inner self, leaving the outer world as it is. you don't feel the need or the urge to change or control the 3D. there is simply no need for you to stress, worry or struggle. you understand that everything is yours, creation is finished and it all exists already. all you do is step into the state of having and being, living in the end where you got it all. you are one with your desire, you are connected to it as well as all the other contents of your reality. your desire has now become a part of you and you are free to chill, relax and to surrender. you have full trust that your desire will and has to unfold exactly how you want it and don't disturb your inner peace by overanalysing or unnecessary questioning. you don't need to rely on external proof, making your state of being depend on the outer world. you are the owner of your desire, the owner of your reality and stay unbothered by any physical circumstance. you are unaffected by anything that isn't favourable for you and refuse to be led on or negatively influenced. you remain living in your imagination, declaring it to be your one and only reality. whenever you desire something, you know that you don't go outside of yourself, searching for what is already within you. anything you could possibly seek, exists in your mind.

with love, ella.

[viviangirlthing]

i've had this idea for a while that i like but can't seem to shape into a story, so if you're inspired by this or know of something similar do let me know! i love seeing ideas flow between people

picture time as a fuzzy thing. there's still causality, but multiple things can cause the same event to happen. not only that, but the past is only defined by what people know and believe to have happened. in such a world, the present only exists as far as the observers within it can experience it, similar to how a video game only renders textures that the player is going to see within the frame that muat be drawn

within that world, there are people who have mastered the art of moving in the shadows of the past to their advantage. they call the unknown past the nowhere, and as long as the present that everyone else knows stays the same, they can traverse the nowhere to make whatever alterations they wish. the catch? they need to physically move their bodies to the location of the change to make it happen. basically, time travel to the past works for them only via sending their consciousness back in time. to make sure that they end up at the same perceived outcome, the universe conspires to change their actions towards that end. they will "feel" the edges of their agency, for example, if they approach an area well-remembered at that point in time by a person who is presently alive and cannot be reversibly changed. similarly, if a change is made, ex. they steal an object from a museum, it must be placed back by the time the present catches up.

but what about the changes to that object? if it's been used, it must have fingerprints or signs of wear on it. well, it could! memories, which are what define reality in this world, are fuzzy. what doesn't get noticed, either because it's unobserved *or because it's a small detail*, won't be an obstacle for those travelling within the nowhere

if you want to see it another way, their way of time travelling and altering the past boils down to changing their memories of the past. if their memories aren't realistic enough, they won't affect reality, and they develop a sense for when that disruption is about to occur. this setup allows for various setups such as seeking out a person to alter their memories or even kill them, so that the nowhere can be enlarged. of course, this also means that the further back you go the more freedom you have, but your body and mind are also more limited in their abilities

[bluedalahorse]

Here's a random YR ask for you:

As a writer, what would you say are some of Sara, August and Felice's core characteristics/essential building blocks? (Feel free to do Wilhelm and Simon's as well if you'd like!) From a canon perspective, but also from the perspective of a fic writer?

What a wonderful ask! Thank you for sending it. This made me think a lot about what I do to develop characters in a story more generally. Then I had to put those techniques into distinct categories. So what I’m going to do is explain the categories first, then move on to how I think about these categories for each character.

I just did Felice, Sara, and August, but I could do additional characters upon request if other people wanted. My askbox is still open!

On to answering the ask. Here’s some things I try to keep in mind more generally when writing any character in a fic…

Desire lines: a story is driven by what a character wants. This want often comes into conflict with what a character fears, or what they believe to be true about themself that isn’t quite true. What a character wants will determine what they do over the course of the story and the different scenes that will transpire as they try to get it. One of the trickiest things about desire lines is that you have to think about them on both the abstract and the concrete level, which determines how those desires show up internally and externally.

Bodily and sensory experiences: every character has a different body and a different experience in that body. Part of these experiences are going to be external—how other people respond to them because of their race, gender expression, perceived ability, etc. These experiences will also be internal. An important part of making a story gripping is sitting close to your viewpoint character’s perspective, and you can bring a reader closer to a character by bringing them into that character’s body. It’s also a good way to reinforce how a character is feeling their emotions.

Contradictions, rationalizations, and sources of cognitive dissonance: This is a fun one! I think sometimes we fall into the trap of trying to make characters too logical, because we hear that characters should be consistent. The reality is though that people tend to run on their own internal logic, and that sometimes internal logic is inconsistent or hypocritical or complicated, and we spend a lot of life trying to process all that. Leaning into the weirdest parts of a character’s internal logic, instead of trying resolve everything or smooth it over right away, is part of how you make a character unique. You can also deepen your understanding of a character’s internal conflict by doing this.

Mentor texts: My writing life changed dramatically when my writing teachers encouraged me to start looking at stories I liked and studying their craft techniques so I can experiment with using them in my own work. In fanfiction, this will mean studying the source text you’re making fanfiction about, but I don’t think you *only* have to study the source text. Like if a book you read reminds you of a particular character in YR and you love that book, you can study that book’s pacing or voice or POV or whatever to get an idea of how you’d tell their story.

On to each of the three characters…

Felice

Desire lines: Canon tends to be somewhat vague about Felice’s desire lines, but if I had to pick, I’d say her desires line up with living an authentic life that is true to herself, and secondarily, achieving justice through discovery of the truth. Felice concretely goes after these desires by pursuing a friendship with Sara, trying to figure out who releases the video, changing how she wears her hair, telling the school inspectors what really happens at Hillerska, etc. I don’t think she has to stick with these desires in a fanfic, but they can inform a new desire I might assign her. For instance, if I was writing a fic where Felice wants to fall in love and get into a long-term romantic relationship, I think I’d build upon her canon journey by having her grapple with who she becomes in dating situations, and what kind of relationship feels authentic to her. Her interest in justice and the truth might also lend itself to a storyline where she learns to advocate for herself in a partnership.

Bodily and sensory experiences: Felice knows she is going to stand out in most situations and be noticed for things that others aren’t. Whenever we’ve seen her in canon, she’s one of the few brown faces in a room full of white ones. (Side thought: I’d love to read a fic where Felice is in a predominantly Black environment, so we can see how her thought patterns would shift.) She’s also rich, and has been raised by her mother to pay attention to physical appearance and brands of clothing and so on. As such, Felice is probably going to be constantly monitoring her body language and how she occupies space. She’s going to be thinking about how her clothes fit and her makeup and the messages they send. Because of the comments her mother makes about her weight, she’ll probably be self-conscious about her figure. We can also consider how Felice takes in information through her senses. Because she’s interested in cooking, she’ll probably be fairly attuned to the taste, smell, and texture of food, and pick up subtleties that others might not.

Contradictions, rationalizations, and sources of cognitive dissonance: In canon we see Felice breaking away from the world of Hillerska and its values, and it’s actually a process. Her parents don’t show up much in the show, but one headcanon I have is that they aren’t just doing the things they do to make Felice’s life miserable. I think on some level they believe they’re protecting her and providing her with the best possible life. Felice’s mother thinks Felice can marry Wilhelm not only because she wants her family to be related to royalty, but because she thinks it’s what’s going to make Felice happy and powerful. Similarly, Felice’s girl squad looks up to her and thinks she’s wonderful, and they have fun together, but they also microaggress her. I think a lot of cognitive dissonance Felice will have to push through surrounds these situations. I think she might tell herself “it could be worse” a lot. Like, sure her mom’s being a nightmare, but it could be worse, right? Felice’s friends sometimes say weird stuff about race, but it’d be worse in public school or if she lived elsewhere, right? I think Felice might have to push past this supposed safety of being a rich popular girl at Hillerska, to really articulate what she needs in life.

Mentor texts: My two favorite books that pair with my understanding of Felice are When You Were Everything by Ashley Woodfolk and The Black Kids by Christina Hammonds Reed. Both are focused on Black teen girl protagonists coming to understand their friendships, their families, and their relationship to power structures in the world.

Bonus Felice note: Felice can be a little messy sometimes! I think there’s this pressure to portray her as thoroughly wonderful, but we also know her closet’s a mess and she lies to get out of gym class and had a shoplifting phase. Next time I write her, I’m challenging myself to lean into a moment where she might be selfish or impatient or dishonest or a bad friend, because she can be even more wonderful when we can embrace her flawed moments too.

Sara and August go below the cut, because this is already very long.

Sara

Desire lines: In canon, Sara wants to be seen as independent and capable of handling things without Simon. She also wants to feel connected to other people, having grown up quite lonely and bullied by other children. Sara pursues these desires concretely by pursuing a friendship with Felice and a romance with August, trying to live on campus at Hillerska, etc. Again, we see her achieve these desires in canon, but we can evolve them and use them as a springboard for new stories. Like, we’ve seen what independence looks like at Sara’s current age, but what does it look like in university? Or at a job? What would it mean for Sara to seek out not just friendship but a community of fellow neurodivergent people? It’d be fascinating to take her newfound confidence and put it to the test in new situations.

Bodily and sensory experiences: Sara is small, and we see the way her smallness interacts with her being an observer or witness. Some people might perceive her as younger than she is because of her height. She has to look up at almost all of her other classmates and the people around her. Any romantic interaction between Sara and August is going to start as a negotiation between his tallness and her smallness—you can say a lot in a scene based on whether she stands on tip toes to reach him, or he bends down or picks her up to kiss her. Sara’s autism and ADHD are also going to play a role in how she experiences her body. She’ll need to take meds in the morning, and as her meds wear off over the course of the day, she might feel different stimuli pulling her attention and/or need to move her body more. Her meds might work differently when she’s on her period. She may also struggle with interoception, and not register signals from her body right away. Sensory sensitivities might come up for Sara, especially when she’s distressed. Smell and sound might get to her especially, since we see her using headphones to concentrate in school, and since her dad mentions fragrance-free laundry detergent. Because she’s a high masking autistic, she may have an internal monologue going in high stakes social situations—checking to see if she made the right amount of eye contact, wondering if her tone of voice was right for a situation, wondering why she can never smile the right amount for other people. Based on season 3, shame changes the way Sara carries her body. She’ll be feeling that internally, too.

Contradictions, rationalizations, and sources of cognitive dissonance: Sara’s living so many of them! Everyone else calls her authentic and praises her for being uniquely herself, but like any other teenager, she’s still figuring out who she is. She loves people who let her down and wonders why the love persists anyway. One of the reasons I enjoy Sara’s overall arc so much is she has to come to terms with the way life and one’s emotions are messy, and then she takes action without sweeping the emotions under the rug completely or disavowing them. To me, I think leaning into that beautiful mess instead of trying to make Sara’s emotions neat and tidy and fandom-approved is an important part of doing her justice. I’d say more, but I worry about triggering another round of Sara Discourse, and the sad thing is that there are still people out there who will read anything she does in bad faith. Sigh.

Mentor texts: When I write Sara, I find myself turning to 19th and early 20th century classics. Jane Eyre, the March sisters, and LM Montgomery’s protagonists go well with Sara’s balance of pragmatism and romanticism, as well as her outsider status. I also find Sara in Joy McCullough’s Enter the Body, a verse novel where Shakespeare’s tragic heroines retell their stories, and in the Into the Woods musical soundtrack. All of these mentor texts help me get at what’s going on with Sara internally.

Bonus Sara note: After receiving my AuDHD diagnosis, I created a guide of resources that fanfiction writers can use for approaching Sara. I’m linking it again in case anyone needs it!

August

Desire lines: Okay this is wild but… what if I told you August’s more abstract desire is a fulfilled sense of belonging and the opportunity to create a sense of belonging for others? August is notoriously bad at understanding his own desires, and even worse at figuring out how to go after them concretely and in ways that don’t bother or harm people, and at the end of the series he is perhaps just realizing he may have miscalculated when he’s in line to be crown prince. But I think one of the things I see as being core to his character is that he’s lonely and traumatized, and he’ll do anything to feel like he belongs with people and is safe somewhere, and part of that shows up in also trying to be a leader within the Hillerska community. Because if you’re running all the traditions, no one’s going to question if you belong, right? Hence his working so hard to be prefect and captain of the rowing team and de facto leader of the Society and planner of all the parties. He knows those things matter to him and to others. At the beginning of the series, August’s idea of how to create a sense of belonging for himself is deeply flawed. It rests more on the exclusion of many so that an elite few can feel included. Over the course of the series, we see him reevaluate that idea, and I would argue that his understanding of belonging is now changing. I think I’ve gone on a tangent here, so let me try to bring this to some sort of satisfying conclusion. I think any portrayal of August that tries to simplify him down to wanting power or status or the ability to make Wilhelm and Simon’s lives miserable… just isn’t going to hit as hard as an August with a deeply buried earnest need for belonging and love and safety at his core. Even when I wrote him as more of a villain with a deeply tragic ending, this was true.

Bodily and sensory experiences: August’s relationship to his body is so fraught! He’s tall and imposing and looks quite grown up, but this is a fairly recent development, and it wasn’t long ago that he likely looked like a sweet little kid and then an awkward gangly boy in his early to mid-teens. This is all happening very fast, and I think there’s a stark contrast between August’s internal little boyishness (and all the fear and earnestness that goes with that) and his apparent adult maturity. August is probably always physically coming up against stuff that reminds him how fast his life changed—it’s not just that his father died, it’s that he can now wear his father’s old clothes, and his mother is now smaller than he is and hugs from her probably feel different. Moreover, August seems to need to move his body to self-regulate. If you’re a writing a fic from his perspective, think about where he’ll feel his restlessness, and whether he’ll be tapping a pen or pulling his hair or trying to for a run to process it all. I think it’s worth considering all this history of August’s body alongside more obvious things like August’s disordered eating and exercising, and whatever he feels after standing naked in front of the third years. As someone carrying a lot of complex trauma, he’s probably hypervigilant, with sensory sensitivities to go with that.

Contradictions, rationalizations, and sources of cognitive dissonance: We could be here all day, couldn’t we? Like Felice, August is supposed to be benefitting from the system he’s in, but he’s not. He tends to assume he’s failing the system instead of the system failing him, and doubles down on trying to meet this elite idea that will only make him miserable. At the same time, August has an impulsive streak, so he sometimes acts first and rationalizes his more impulsive decisions after the fact. He does an initial round of harm when he acts impulsively, but then doles out additional harm through what he does when he’s rationalizing. In addition, August is trapped in a well of traumatic grief for both his father and Erik, both of whom gave him some sense of identity and belonging, but who also harmed him in their own particular ways. He’s sitting in the emotional dissonance of that every minute of the series. While August and Wilhelm have begun to grieve Erik together, August still doesn’t have anyone he can discuss his father with yet.

Mentor texts: Tana French is my go-to for all things August. She’s great with unpleasant but compelling characters, writing about social class, and unearthing buried traumas. Her settings often act as extensions of the characters and themes, and I feel like August-centered fics can develop and lean on emotionally resonant settings (Årnäs, Hillerska, the palace) as an extension of his internal landscape. I also want to mention the soundtrack to Fun Home as another inspiration, because of the way it handles grief and dysfunctional families.

Bonus August note: As fun as it is to write August doing the wrong thing for the wrong reasons, he can’t be that way all the time. I also write him doing the wrong thing for the right reasons, the right thing for the wrong reasons, and even the right thing for the right reasons. I also do not write him as a cold master manipulator or as someone with a high opinion of himself—internally August loathes himself to the point of self-destructive behaviors. Any story that acknowledges these things really captures the flavor of August, in my opinion.

[astrojulia]

PAC - Becoming your Best Self

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DISCLAIMER. These general free readings are made in good faith for entertainment purpose.

How to pick a pile

When you have different cards to choose from in pile 1,2,3… look at each of those cards. Wait until someone reminds you of a memory. Perhaps a character’s outfit resembles one of your own. It is this pile that has its message. What if they all remind me of something? Go for the one with the strongest memory, one might look like her earring but another might be the favorite candy you got from your grandma when you vacationed at her house. But what if none reminds me of something? Take a deep breath and wait a little longer, without charging yourself or creating worries. Relax, some will awaken some memory in you, I promise! .

Pile 1 - Key

(The Rain - The Sleep - The Illusion - The Glow - The Power)

Your best version is productive and expansive, capable of helping others reach their own best versions. When you're in a good state, you're a fun and playful person who enjoys going out and having a good laugh.

Today, in order to become your best version, what you need to do is rest, rest, and sleep. Honestly, there's no big secret. You need to press the pause button, let the movie stop for a while, grab a snack, and then resume watching the movie... but this movie represents a task you have at hand. I understand it's something that worries and saddens you, but it won't get better if you continue in that state.

You need to reconnect with the things that are important to you but that you've lost touch with. Visualize what you want and don't simply believe that it will happen one day if fate allows. Often, fate doesn't care about us, and we have to make things happen. To take care of yourself and become your best version today, think like your best version (yes, it may sound like a cliché from a coach, but it holds true here).

You must leave behind the small past triumphs because, as I mentioned, they are just small. They don't represent the best you've had, and better times are ahead, or perhaps, good times are already happening but you're not fully experiencing them—they merely remain as memories. Don't believe that you won't be able to laugh and have fun like you used to in the old days.

To regain your authenticity and true self, you will need courage and strength. The power to achieve this lies within you, but you're afraid of being judged for your childlike preferences. Remember, your best version is personal to you—it might be perceived as irresponsible and childish by others, but that doesn't matter. Don't be afraid to reveal yourself as someone who is delicate, fun-loving, and even clownish. The reality is this: people will judge you regardless of what you do.

Pile 2 - Violin

(The Light - The Flower - The Loop - The Song - The Fly)

Your best version is grandiose and radiates brilliance. You're a natural leader who possesses the ability to communicate and touch people's hearts. You understand that everyone has an inner radiance that simply needs to be recognized. The best version of you believes in the inherent goodness of the world and its people, recognizing that they are often just confused. You are a person filled with hope for humanity.

To become your best version today, it is important to relax more and engage in your hobbies, especially dancing. Currently, you are under significant stress, feeling chained and in need of liberation. These chains are both mental and physical. I'm not naive enough to claim that everything is someone else's fault, as the environment we live in plays a role. However, you can alleviate some of the mental and emotional burdens by incorporating more fun into your life.

To care for yourself in your present state, establishing a routine is essential. Create a plan and commit to following it. Write down day by day how your routine will unfold, what activities you will engage in. At the end of each day, reflect on how it went and strive to adhere to this plan for at least three months, ideally until the end of the year.

You must let go of your envy towards others and your inclination to emulate their paths in an attempt to achieve the same results. You are a unique being, and as we have witnessed in your best version, you are a star that illuminates everyone around you. Trust me, your radiance is exceptional, so cease attempting to shine like others.

To embody your most authentic self, take risks, soar higher, be versatile, and show up. Do not fear the judgment of others or tread the path of others out of fear of failure. You possess wings and know how to fly. Present yourself to the world as you truly are—an enlightened, artistic individual with a compassionate heart.

Pile 3 - Lock

(The Time - The Dark - The Snow - The Little - The Shield)

Your best self is wise, recognizing that everything has its own timing and that time is a universal law. Healing takes time, and although it varies for each individual, it eventually passes for everyone. You are a reserved and self-assured person, understanding that you are different from others, and that's why you seek different experiences to feel complete and happy.

In order for this to happen, it's important to maintain a level of reserve. Recognize that we all have our secrets and difficulties, and therefore, you should refrain from judging others. Face your own challenges independently, without relying on others. The value you possess should come from within, rather than being dependent on external validation. Your path is not that of a hero, but rather that of a heroine.

Take some time to cool off. If you are from the northern hemisphere, you may already be encountering snow, so embrace it and have fun with it. Embrace the part of you that may be colder, more distant, and perhaps even icy. You don't always have to wear a smile on your face. Embrace your serene and calm nature. Don't be swayed when others suggest that you need to open up more. To be honest, you don't need to—being yourself is already enough.

You must let go of the impression that you are insignificant and easily trampled upon if you are not one hundred percent kind to everyone. Remember, your personality is your own, and your life belongs to you. People will talk about you, whether it's good or bad, regardless of what you do. Strive to be polite and respectful toward others, but don't diminish your worth for anyone.

To embrace your most authentic self, take a moment to pause and reflect on who you truly are. Embrace your boundaries, protect yourself, and nurture yourself. You often extend kindness, time, affection, and empathy to others, while neglecting your own needs. Stop being overly critical of yourself, thinking that you need to do more or be better. It's okay to strive for growth, but remember that self-improvement should stem from self-love, not from fear of your own reflection.

(CC) AstroJulia Some Rights Reserved