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how the boys would kiss you the most often <3
my sweet, darling anon I’m kissing your lips 4 this
——— ౨ৎ ⊹ ࣪ ˖
percy jackson lives for regular french kisses. and it’s fairly simple, he knows, but he loves nothing more. I’m talking, sneaking them every second, like someone leaves the room- kiss- you’re trying to do something- kiss- bored- kiss- LITERALLY all the time someone stop the boy!!! though, in his defense he likes the intimacy of it, knowing that he’s the only one that gets to do this, or just simply tasting you… he’s so obsessed oh my gods…
connor stoll is a neck-kisser I feel it in my veins (he’s literally my soulmate trust me on this). and he’s guilty of leaving a plethora of marks too this boy literally needs to be stopped!!! n he lovessss wrapping his fingers around the belt loops of your jeans to pull you closer, or even holding the back of your hand and tangling his fingers in your hair to prevent you from moving away (mannnn….) he’s literally so silly!!!!
jason grace is the biggesttttt hand-kissing enthusiast ever!!!! he love love loves, firstly, just holding your hands in his, running his thumb over your knuckles delicately, and nearly even moment you feel pecks to literally any piece relating to your hand— fingertips, knuckles, palm, wrist, the dorsal side, he lovesss acting all gentleman-y it’s SO cute!!!
leo valdez is the worlds most notorious cheek-kisser for sure!! they’re simple, quick, but they’re enough for him to silently display his affections for you so they suffice. sometimes, if you’re really lucky, you’ll a kiss for each cheek!!!! (though that’s most of the time).
luke castellan adores forehead kisses. they’re simple, basic even, yes, but they hold more than just a simple gesture, or at the very least to him they do. and, on the other side of things, if you’re not huge on pda it’s a small enough kiss for you to handle around people. also, it works for all situations, in a hurry, falling asleep, parting ways, a simple act of affection, excited… it’s just lovely to know something so tiny can hold so much meaning.
#xoxochb#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo series#pjo fandom#percy jackson#pjo#percy series#percy jackson x reader#percy jackson x y/n#percy jackson x you#connor stoll#connor stoll x reader#connor stoll x you#connor stoll x y/n#jason grace imagines#jason grace pjo#jason grace#jason grace x reader#jason grace x y/n#jason grace x you#leo valdez pjo#leo valdez x you#leo valdez x reader#leo valdez x y/n#leo valdez#luke castellan fic#luke castellan smut#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan#luke castellan x you
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DUST OF US - 02
> synopsis: 7 years ago Y/N broke Jungkook’s heart when she decided to end their relationship without an explanation. When they meet again at a friend's wedding, after almost a decade, Jungkook needs answers to move on.
> pairing: Jungkook x reader
> genre: romance, ex to lovers au
> warnings: explicit languages, violence, smut, cheating, nsfw, angst, +18 minors dni !!
> word count: 3.2k
*french writer, i apologize in advance for my awful english!
You lift your eyes to him. Your conversation had already been weird, but you hadn’t expected him to drop a bomb like that. What are you supposed to reply to that? Instead, you stare at him, not knowing what to say or what to do. He seems like he’s waiting for an answer, but you don’t have any for him.
“I’m sorry,” is all that came out of your mouth.
“For what?” he asks as you take a deep breath, looking at the floor and nervously chewing your bottom lip.
“For wasting four years of your life.” You raise your shoulders before waiting for a reaction from him. But instead, he starts to chuckle, shaking his head.
“Is that what you think of us? That our…” He pinches his lips, searching for an alternative to ’love' “our relationship was a waste?”
“I don’t know. We were kids,” you reply, as his eyes seem to burn the side of your face before you see him take a few steps back.
Do you think your relationship was a waste? No. He was your first love. You experienced all your first times with him. First date, first time, first heartbreak. Jungkook sighs, shaking his head.
“I loved you,” is all that could slip from his lips as your eyes finally met his.
“I loved you too,” you whisper, feeling your throat clenching. And your words seem to comfort him a little. He needed to hear it. Even if you had told him multiple times back then.
“I…I’m going to be around more often.” He informs you, with one hand in his pocket and the other pulling the beer to his lips. “I don’t want us to be like all those exes who hate each other. Can we be friends?”
You never thought you would hear him say that one day. But you’re relieved. Between you, Jungkook was always the most mature.
“Do you think we can be friends?” You ask, arching a brow as he chuckles, raising his shoulders.
“We both moved on.” The tattooed man tilts his head.
“You literally just asked me to give you the reason for our breakup from 7 years ago." You roll your eyes, but he simply smiles.
“I’m curious.” He takes a step closer. “I just want to understand where I did it wrong for you to leave me without an explanation. Was it because of my snoring?” He jokes to lighten the mood, and you give him an amused look.
“I used to fall asleep to your snoring,” you retort with a slight smile.
“You’re the first girl— woman who’s not bothered about it.” he chuckles, shrugs, and sits on the grass. You imitate him, leaning against the wall next to him.
People can be annoyed by the snoring, but you have always liked his. The first week after your breakup, you didn’t sleep well with the silence surrounding you. Seven years later, you still leave the TV on at night.
“So… friends?” He asks, tilting his head in your direction. You hesitate for a few seconds before taking the hand he is offering and giving it a squeeze.
“Friends.”
“How’s your work?” It must be stressful to have so many responsibilities as a shop owner.” Jungkook tries to start a conversation, and you know you need to keep it going since he took the first step.
“I’m…grateful. I worked hard to do what I love.” You reply, pushing your dress down as you try to find a comfortable position without showing your private parts to the few guests around. Jungkook noticed, and he took off his jacket to cover your legs, even though you tried to refuse. That’s just how he was—genuinely kind without ulterior motives, “Thanks,” you mumble. “What about you?”
“I fixed some computers for grannies,” he nods, both of you laughing softly. “I applied for a job at the government, but self-employment is quite tempting. I'm not suited for a 9-5 job.”
"You were never built for that," you shake your head. Taking a sip of your champagne, you grimace, and leave the bottle between the two of you
“Tell me about it.” He laughs, finishing his beer. “I need to settle down properly before thinking of working for myself.”
“Where are you staying at the moment?”
“Jimin’s.” He raises his shoulders. “I do jobs here and there, as I said. But my degrees are not just for decoration. I’d better find a good use for it.”
“I can’t believe you really found studies to be a hacker,” you laugh as he looks at you, amused.
“I’m a pentester,” he corrects you, earning eye rolls from you.
“You’re hacking people to see if their security works. That’s the same.”
“Except, I do it legally.” He teases, lifting his finger.
“Right. That changes everything.” You add sarcastically, not feeling his admiring eyes on you. “At least you do your dream job.”
“I do.”
“We should go back to the party,” you suggest sighing and getting up as Jungkook hums, mirroring you. You hand him back his jacket, saying, “Thanks for that,” and he nods.
“No need to thank me,” he replies, pulling it back on his shoulders as you two walk to the door. “Hey. Do you offer a discount for new friends?”
You raise an eyebrow at his words, your eyes falling on his inked forearm.
“What do you have in mind?”
“Just some filling and a few colorings,” he explains, showing you the blank space between his tattoos. “My old tattoo artist sucked. I’m looking for a new one.”
Some part of you knew he was just making excuses, as his tattoos were perfectly fine. They need a few fillings, as he said, but otherwise, they look great.
“I double the price for the exes, actually.” You retort, and he laughs.
“Damn, Nabi, who hurts you?” He jokes, and you roll your eyes before freezing at the nickname. A few of your friends call you Nabi. The ones who are close. Hearing it from him makes your stomach almost drop. He doesn’t seem to see it. And it was for the better.
“Ask Jimin for the shop’s address. I’ll see what I can do for you.” You mumble, and he nods, pulling down his sleeves. “I need to go back to the bride. You know how dramatic Hyesun can be. She’ll think I abandoned her.”
“Right. Thanks, Y/N. I really... enjoyed our conversation.” He says sincerely, earning a slight smile from you.
“Me too. See you around... friend.” You wave at him before walking back to your friend group.
You sit next to Hyesun at Namjoon’s coffee shop. They were back from their honeymoon a few days ago, Hwan and you wanted to know everything about it. They went to Jeju and spent a whole week lovey-dovey.
“So, the next step is kids?” Hwan asks, crossing her legs as Hyesun almost choked on her iced coffee.
“Damn, Hwan, do you really think that marriage and kids are linked or what?” Hyesun groans. She gives a look to her husband, who’s behind his counter, offering his best smile to a client before catching her eyes and blowing her a kiss. “No, maybe after my thirties, but we want to enjoy each other as much as we can.”
“In other terms, they want to fuck on the kitchen’s counter like animals for as long as possible,” You muse, as she smirks and slaps your shoulder.
“Don’t laugh too much, miss, you still have some explanation to do.” Hyesun scolds you as you frown a little.
“About what?”
“About what?” Hyesun repeats. “Maybe how you disappeared with your ex in the middle of my wedding reception and came back with him, giggling and heart eyed.
You roll your eyes and take a sip of your black coffee.
“That’s pretty exaggerated.” You sigh as Hwan looks at the both of you, lost. Hwan joined your friends' group three years ago. She doesn’t know anything about your story with Jungkook. And Hyesun smirks, pulling her chair closer to your mutual friend.
“I don’t understand,” Hwan chuckles.
“Yeah, you weren’t there, but that lady here was in a long-term relationship a few years ago." Hyesun muses as you lean back in your chair, shaking your head. “She was supposed to be the one getting married before any of us.”
“Y/N?” Hwan frowns, not believing Hyesun.
“Yeah, Y/N.” Hyesun nods, “Hard to believe, right?”
“Yeah. I have never seen her with anyone since I have known her.” Your red-haired friend laughs as you scrunch your nose, amused.
“Can you focus on your marriage instead of talking about old stories?” You arch a brow, giving her a look.
“No, no, I want to know.” Hwan shushed you, shaking her hand in front of my face. “What happened? Why are they not together anymore?”
“Y/N is a self-sabotaging type of person.” Hyesun grimaces, “Jungkook was ready to offer her the moon if she asked for it.”
“Gosh…” You sigh, but your two friends interrupt you as you continue to sip your coffee.
“They have been dating since high school. How old were you when he asked you to be his girlfriend?” Hyesun turns to you as you wet your lips.
“Seventeen.”
“Right. They were like the couple goal back then.” Your best friend continues, while Hwan is listening attentively. “Jungkook always shouted out to the world that he was going to spend his life with her.”
“We were kids.”
“Shut up,” Hyesun says, stopping you as you chuckled. “Everyone knew from the moment you two started spending time together that you were meant to be.”
“Then why did you break up with him?” Hwan frowns. “You fell out of love?”
You take a deep breath and shrug. “No.” Was all you could reply, chewing the inside of your cheek, “I loved him when I ended things,” you add as both of your friends wait for your next words. “Oh my god... I broke up with him because he was about to leave for Japan, and I couldn’t follow him. Our relationship ended there. That’s it.”
“Japan is just two hours away from here. Jungkook would have made it work, and you know that.” Hyesun gives you a deadpan stare.
“He was going to be there for 5-6 years.” You retort, frowning. “What was I supposed to do? Wait for him here? What if our relationship couldn’t make it through the long distance? What if he started seeing someone there and I was unaware of it?”
“You and I both know that the Jungkook from that time would rather cut his dick off than cheat on you.” Hyesun defends Jungkook as you roll your eyes. “He’ll most likely cheat on his new girlfriend with you, rather than cheating on you with others.”
“You’re so stupid sometimes, Y/N.” Hwan shakes her head as you cover your face in embarrassment. “Now we’ll never know because you’re a scary little thing who’s too afraid to take a risk for her own comfort.”
“Are you really teaming up against me?” You chuckle, crossing your arms under your chest. You weren’t surprised by how harsh they can be. It’s how your friendship with these girls works. At least you know they’re genuine and not sugarcoating everything.
“I’m sorry, but have you seen that guy? I wouldn’t give up on him, even if he was a huge dickhead.” Hwan adds, and Hyesun nods behind her shoulder. “Shit.. I wanted to ask for his number, but since you have a too huge connection with him, I’ll just… watch him… from afar.”
“You still can, he’s single,” You raise an eyebrow, her face contorting into a grimace.
“Y/N, sweetie,” Hwan shakes her head, “He’s not a two-week boyfriend of yours. He was the love of your life. So, thank you, but no thank you.” She adds before Hyesun offers her a high-five.
“Anyway, you won’t dodge the question. What happened between you two at the wedding?” Hyesun tilts her head to you, pulling the straw between her lips in a sassy way.
“What do you think happened?” You chuckle, rolling your eyes.
“Something passionate, maybe a little make out session with wandering hands.” Hyesun raises her shoulders. You burst out laughing and shake your head.
“We simply talked.” You shatter their dreams as the two girls whine. “He asked me to be friends. I said yes.”
They both exchange a look before sipping their drinks silently as you frown. You hate it when they do that.
“What?” You groan, straightening up in your chair, and exclaim, “What?!”
Hyesun starts by saying “Y/N…” as Hwan giggles.
“Sweetheart, I’ll hold your hand when I say it,” Hwan adds, taking your hand dramatically, covering it with her other hand as she rubs it softly. “No ex stays ‘friends’. Either neither of you has moved on, or one of you is lying about their feelings.”
“Or none of them have loved each other.” Hyesun nods in agreement with Hwan, saying, “But we both know that… well, you both were crazy about each other.”
“So, do you still have feelings for him?”
“What?” You frown, taking your hand off Hwan’s when she asks you that question. “You’re both ridiculous. I don’t have feelings for him anymore. We were friends before we got into a relationship, you know that?”
“That’s not the same,” Hwan says, rolling her eyes.
“Yeah, you didn’t taste his dick the first time you two were friends.” Hyesun muses as you groan, pressing your forehead on the table dramatically.
“You know what? Fuck you. Both of you.” You sigh, shaking your head as they both laugh. “I’m sure he only asked me to be his friend to be polite anyway; I haven’t had news from him since the wedding.”
“Because you’re waiting for his news?” Hwan hums playfully.
“What- No! He wanted me to see what I could do for his tattoos—” you continue but they both give you an amused look. “Alright, shut up. I’m done talking about that.”
You were distracted by your thoughts while cleaning the room after your last client. After a six-hour-long work session, your back aches and your fingers are numb from the tattoo machine's constant buzz. But at least your client left happy with her new thigh tattoo. Spraying some disinfectant on the table, you start to wipe it meticulously.
“Sorry, sir, we’re closing,” you hear Baekhyun’s voice after the front door opened. “You can come back tomorrow; we’re opening at 9.”
“That’s okay, I’m not here to get tattooed,” The other masculine voice says as you straight up, leaving everything on the table and walking to the counter for a better view. "Is Y/N here?”
“It’s okay, Baekhyun, I’ll take care of it,” You add walking past your employee as he nods, “Finish the cleaning in the back.”
Baekhyun frowns, his eyes never leaving your face while you’re taking off your gloves and join Jungkook. He wears a casual, all-black attire, as always, with his whole sleeve tattoo on display and a beanie on his head, from which a few strands of hair fell to his neck.
“Hi,” he offers you a half smile.
“It’s late,” you reply, tilting your head as he chuckles and scratches the back of his head, his arm muscles flexing. Your eyes can’t help but follow the movement.
“The grannies computers,” he jokes, earning a smile from you while Baekhyun frown, noticing the sudden softness in your demeanor.
Jungkook’s eyes switch from Baekhyun to you a few times as you turn to the other tattoo artist who didn’t move a bit.
“Baek?” You shake your head, as if waiting for him to give you the privacy you asked.
“Oh, yeah, right.” He mumbles, giving Jungkook a last look before going into the room behind the counter, saying, “I’ll be here, if you need me.”
You roll your eyes and step closer to Jungkook, leaning your hip against the counter. “Are the grannies happy?” You ask as he offers you a shy smile and nods.
“A lot.” He confirms, before looking around the tattoo shop. “You decorated it nicely.”
“Thanks. Did you come alone?”
“Hm.”
An awkward silence fills the room before you chuckle, shaking your head.
“So, what can I do for you, Mr. Jeon?” You try to ease the tension by making a gesture with your hand, indicating his body.
“Huh? Oh right. I, uh, the fillings,” He explains clumsily, pulling up his sleeve to show you his entire arm, and you’re surprised at how his tattoos just…make him look hotter.
You step closer again and ask him with a look if you can touch. He slightly nods. Your fingers wrap around his forearm as you twist it to see all the ink on it, spotting every little blank space between his bigger tattoos.
“Your previous tattoo artist was great,” You mumble, too focused to notice his gaze tracing every feature of your face. “That’s not the same… work?” You frown at the way that some designs are rawer.
“The first one did some shitty stuff on my arm,” He whispers, his breath closer to your skin than you thought. You freeze, turning your face and immediately pulling back slightly when your noses almost brush. “The second made up pretty well. But you know what they say? The third time is a charm.”
Your eyes meet his, your fingers still wrapped around his arm as you take a deep breath, trying not to be too obvious about how nervous he’s making you.
“Well, not to be arrogant, but that’s the case,” You reply, and his lips curve into a side smile. “What do you have in mind for the filling?”
“You’re the pro here, I’ll let you decide,” Jungkook declares, your eyes falling back on his arm as you trail your fingers over the empty spaces, earning a shiver from him.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
“Alright,” You lick your lips, “I’ll need to take pictures of your arm to draw what I’ll do…” you add as your eyes fall on the moth on the inside of his arm, darker than the rest of his tattoos, right where the biceps muscle starts.
“Are you free on Saturday?” He asks with a softer voice, tilting his head to catch your eyes.
“I can take the pictures now,” You chuckle nervously.
“For dinner, I mean.” He clarifies as you look at him.
“A date?” You blink, unsure.
“A friendly date,” He corrects you, wetting his lips, as you take a few steps back, bumping your back against the counter, feeling stupid, but he didn’t move. “So?”
Of course, a friendly date. A simple dinner between two adults… two friends.
“Saturday,” You repeat, then nod.
“Saturday,” He lets out a soft chuckle, clearly pleased to see you so flustered. “You can say no tho.”
“No- I mean, yes, a dinner, Saturday.” You shake your head, frowning and catching your phone to take pictures of his arm as he laughs, “When you’re done making fun of me, let me know so I can work properly.” You groan, your camera app open while he smirks, showing off his tattoos for you to snap.
DUST OF US MASTERLIST.
WATTPAD.
buy me a coffee<3
#bts jungkook#jungkook#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#jungkook fanfic#bts#bts fic#bts fanfic#bangtan sonyeondan#bangtan#ex to lovers#SOLARHYS#DUST OF US#DOU#jeon jungkook#jungkook fluff#jungkook fic recs
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池田理代子 Riyoko Ikeda Interview About Oniisama E... (2016)
池田理代子 Riyoko Ikeda
Mangaka and Vocal artist, she began drawing mangas during her university studies, and her work The Rose of Versailles, serialized in 1972, became a huge success, even turning into a social phenomenon. She became highly appreciated internationally. She received the Excellence Award from the Japanese Cartoonists Association for Orpheus no Mado in 1980. The French government decorated her with the Légion d’Honneur for her contributions to spreading French history and culture in Japan.
What led to the creation of Oniisama E... ?
When the serialization of The Rose of Versailles ended, I had already decided that my next work would be a historical epic : Orpheus no Mado. But since it would take time to prepare for the historical research and start drawing it, I thought I could write something in the meantime (laughs). I feel a bit apologetic calling it just a filler, though, but actually, "Oniisama E..." was born from my own personal experiences. It’s a very important and cherished memory for me, and it just came rushing out all at once.
So, was your correspondence with the "Oniisama" also based on your own experience ?
When I was in my third year of middle school, just like Nanako, there was a preparatory course offered by university students from the University of Tokyo. I asked the graduate student who was in charge of social studies (the model for Takehiko Henmi) the same thing Nanako did: "Could you be my 'Oniisama'?" (laughs). I was deeply fascinated by the concept of an 'Oniisama" It's different from the idea of love, though. Through our letters, I learned a lot about history, religion, and various things. When I mentioned my interest in Christianity, he wrote me, "Christianity as it is called, not only « participated » in the WW2 but was also one of its central protagonists : This is a historical truth.." I learned so much from those letters and grew a lot. I even went to the University of Tokyo’s May Festival. Actually, the "Oniisama" always had someone with him, like the omiki sake bottle. That person was the model for Takashi Ichinomiya. He was a person with a thin and delicate appearance, giving the impression of a young master from a wealthy family.
What were you like back then (during your school years) ?
I was really bad at sports, but for some reason, I was quite popular with the girls during my middle and high school years. In middle school, which was co-ed, I had good grades, had a very tanned skin, was tall, and completely lacked femininity, maybe that’s why (laughs). Even in high school, younger students would write me letters. After graduating, I found out that knowing someone like 'Ikeda-san' was really a source of pride for them.
Did you have the storyline planned out from the beginning of the serialization to the ending ?
It was more like ideas came to me as I was drawing. I don’t clearly remember if I had planned everything out until the end, but let’s say I had set certain elements in advance. For example, the idea that Kaoru and Henmi would be a couple came to me along the way (laughs). Even for The Rose of Versailles, I hadn’t decided from the start that Oscar and André would end up together. Of course, there are aspects I plan carefully, but in the end, the characters started acting on their own. And when that happens, I feel like the story is "successful."
Nanako is a very emotional girl, but also extremely determined. As for Mariko, she seems to embody the 'tsundere' archetype to some extent.
Nanako is very similar to Rosalie, isn’t she? Devoted, but in the end, she’s the strongest (laughs). For Mariko, there was a real-life model: a friend whose father wrote erotic novels. I gradually incorporated various elements from the people around me. I think many aspects are direct projections. Even the way Kaoru speaks, that’s really how we used to talk back then. We would say things like “Omae-san” (laughs). Oniisama E... reflects a lot of memories and episodes from my student life.
Oniisama E... is a short story, so its general recognition is low, but it has quite a passionate fanbase.
There are many men who tell me, "I'm a fan!". Recently, it's no longer embarrassing for men to enjoy shoujo manga. During autograph sessions, quite a few people enthusiastically tell me, "I love this work!" Some even say, "Oniisama E... is really my favorite!" When I hear that, I can't help but think, "Well, here's a true connoisseur!" (laughs). Of course, there are also many women among the fans. In that regard, I think Oniisama E... has nothing to envy from The Rose of Versailles.
And then, in 1991, it was adapted into an anime.
Actually, I was very busy at the time, so I wasn’t able to watch it properly… What left a strong impression on me, though, was how they carefully portrayed Fukiko’s feelings for Takehiko, which I hadn’t depicted in the original. I thought, "Oh, that’s so wonderful." It really fit perfectly, and there was no sense of discomfort at all.
It's a remarkable aspect of the anime adaptation. I wish I could have read it in your manga as well.
If I had a little more time, I would have liked to draw it myself. Originally, due to the planning period for Orpheus no Mado, I was rushed. Even though I still had many ideas in mind, it felt like I was forced to wrap it up (laughs).
Given what you’ve just mentioned, have you ever thought about remaking or creating a sequel to your own works?
Right now, I’m drawing a chapter for The Rose of Versailles, but... the art from that time was really bad, and I even hate re-reading it. I realize there were things I could only draw back then. When the serialization of The Rose of Versailles ended, I realized that in order to depict Europe, I would have needed much more knowledge of Christianity. That’s why, before starting Orpheus no Mado, I spent a lot of time studying Christianity. I don’t think I could have drawn the story without that knowledge. A work is the product of its time, of its era, the sensitivities, and the knowledge of the author, so remaking something seems difficult to me.
In 2017, you'll be celebrating your 50th anniversary as a writer.
I can't believe it's already been so long, and at the same time, I realize that some parts of my body are starting to hurt, which reminds me of my age (laughs). I've also been very active in music, but lately, progress has been slower. However, I truly want to cherish each passing year. For me, true happiness is living in a way that I would never regret anything, even if I were to die tomorrow. There's no reason to look back on the past. After all, it’s impossible to rewrite it. I don’t reread my works much either (laughs). I’ve lived my way, sometimes causing trouble to others, but doing what I wanted (laughs).
For this Blu-ray release, new illustrations were specially drawn.
I wasn’t satisfied with the drawings of The Rose of Versailles because I think they were awkwardly executed. Personally, I think Oniisama E... is the work where I drew the best. At that time, I was able to draw very precisely, even the lines were very clean. Over time, some works become hard to rediscover, but Oniisama E... is the one I drew almost effortlessly, simply letting the ideas flow. That’s why, even today, I can dive back into it without effort (laughs).
To those who have brought this product.
Oniisama E... is a work that originates from my own experiences, and it’s the work that I’ve let mature the longest, so I have a strong emotional connection to it. The idea for The Rose of Versailles came to me when I was in my second year of high school, which is quite early, but Oniisama E... came even before that. I would like as many people as possible to see and read it.
About Osamu Tezuka :
He wasn’t my lover, nor a relative, and calling him a friend would be too presumptuous. When I heard the news of his death, I really hit the desk and cried uncontrollably. That feeling was something I’d never experienced before, and it was the first time I felt that way about Tezuka-sensei. I truly respected him. Recently, it’s been the same with Muhammad Ali. Tezuka-sensei's Wellspring of the Crane was the first work that deeply moved me when I read it. It really squeezed my heart. I read it at a friend's house, and after returning home, I couldn’t eat, and my mother wondered if I had picked up some food off the ground. Ah, no one could understand! I remember thinking, as a child, that my sensitivity was different from others! (laughs).
Source: Oniisama E... Blu-Ray BOX SET Booklet.
Note : The translation might not be the most accurate word-for-word, but i did my best to make it coherent.
#おにいさまへ…#dear brother#oniisama e#nanako misonoo#riyoko ikeda#kaoru no kimi#kaoru orihara#mariko shinobu#fukiko ichinomiya#rose of versailles#versailles no bara#osamu tezuka#orpheus no mado
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I know most of the time when I post I’m talking shit or being an asshole, but I wanna take a sec to say who I’m thankful for this thanksgiving.
@elysianwayy77 , not only is she the best fake mom I could ask for, she’s also one of my favorite people. She’s always willing to listen to me yap about stupid shit, and for that I’m thankful.
@soft-likethesunset , is such a good role model, truly a great person. She’s welcoming to any and all, she gives great advice and most importantly she’s helped me bring out my true self. And for that, I’m thankful.
@theodditylacey , I could go on and on about how thankful I am for Lacey. If someone asked me who I wanna be like when I grow up, I’d say Lacey. Lacey has taught me more things than school has ever taught me, she’s smart, she’s mature, and she’s kind. If I had to have someone represent me in court, I’m picking her. I know she’d do anything in her power to help me, and for that, I’m thankful.
@iloveyapping , one of my absolute best friends. Liz is the reason I feel comfortable enough to be myself fully, if I’d never met them then I’d probably still be pretending to be a calm and kind person. I feel like I can talk to them about anything and not be judged, they are the definition of “we listen and we don’t judge.” And for that, I’m thankful.
@hxress23 , has made me realize that there are actually genuine people out in the world, people who don’t want to rain on your parade constantly. She’s the first person to complaint me, she’s the first person to ask me how my days been, she’s the first person that truly wants to know about YOU. And for that, I’m thankful.
@glxsyymads , Maddie. Mads is someone that I wish I could clone and give everyone one of her. She’s the kindest person you’ll ever meet, she makes me smile when I have a bad day, she makes me feel better about myself when I feel horrid, she makes me cackling at the most ridiculous times, she makes my life sunnier. And for that, I’m thankful.
@the-french-fry , we haven’t known each other for too long but every conversation with you feels like getting to see your favorite cousins after months apart, we never run out of things to talk about and you make me smile every time I see your account pop up, and for that, I’m thankful.
HONORABLE MENTIONS: @junefl0wers @cultclassic111 @viqwxcs @wish-i-were-heather @auntiejohn
Obviously I’m thankful for every single one of you but these are just the people that have hugely impacted my life in the small amount of time that I’ve been on this app!
#toooster#patch yaps#jade! 🐈⬛#neens! 🐝#lacey!✨#liz! 🦎#sanjana!🦩#mads!🤎#potato! 🥔#june! 🪼#bebe! 🐛#cami!⭐️#eunioa!🗣️#jess! 🎧
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YALL DONT UNDERSTAND
My favorite part of Bruce and Dicks relationship isn’t the unending loyalty and devotion and the self assured destruction of loving a man who hates himself on Dicks part and using an eternally flying man as a your stable ground on Bruce’s part
It’s not the adoration that feels like shackles or the unending trust that feels like raking hot coals over your back
It’s the fact that Dick Grayson will always love Bruce Wayne
And also
Always want to kick the absolute shit out of him
Violently
Like Dick has pent up rage and we see him lash out at people but almost never has he ever attacked any loved ones physically with the exception of Roy Harper after the women who they both loved more than life itself passed.
But with Bruce?
Yeah no
Dick not only hits to hurt
He hits with the aim of getting Bruce down and keeping him there.
It feels like vindication to him
He borderline revels in it
I mean look at the hits he landed during the Gotham War run or Forever Evil/Spyral
And then there’s Bruce
Who knows
Because he is not an idiot
And he knows he fucked up with Dick more than the rest as Robin (nothing can really compare to how he treats Jason as the red hood)
But do you think Batman feels guilt over the fact that Dick HAS this much rage and bitterness over the things Bruce has done
Like Dick in unendingly Kind and forgiving but he’s also and pardon my French, a dick (lowercase) so he absolutely holds resentment over the stuff Bruce did to him even if it’s water under the bridge in his day to day
But he’s still mad
He’s still mad over the loss of Robin
The gauntlet
The death of Jason Todd
The court of the owls
The reveal of Damian Wayne
The fact that Dick had to be Batman
The fact that Bruce died
The fact that Bruce told Dick he never should’ve been Batman
The fact that dick had to continue the cycle of orphans raising orphans
(no he doesn’t count Talia as a parent cuz then he’d have to view her as human and human life has value and in his opinion she has no value and should go find a nice comfy corner to die in like an old cat)
The fact that he was basically pushed into a pseudo father role with all the kids past Jason
Letting him kill the Joker
Bringing the joker back to life
Damian’s death
Steph’s fake death
Spyral
Losing his memories and leaving Dick alone at spyral
Showing Dick a video of him getting shot in the head when he’s mentally a 12 year old and also an amnesiac
And about 6 million other heart wrenching things
So yeah Dick hits to hurt and those times where Bruce has lost control (mind control, clone, fight etc) and Dick has Carte Blanche to cause harm to Bruce
He
Does
#dick grayson#batman#nightwing#bruce wayne#comics#You’ll never recover from that kind of devotion#dick grayson and bruce wayne#damian wayne#jason todd#batfamily#tim drake#batfam#forever evil
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I'm always in when it comes to Taylor Swift, so please tell us what fic you imagined!
Pd: your mind is something amazing to me, like, how can you create fics plots so quickly? that's the mind of an artist there!
Oh my gosh, I love it so much when someone supports my chaotic, nonsensical ideas! Honestly, it feels so good to just have someone to bounce these wild thoughts off. And thank you for calling me an artist! I don’t usually think of myself as one, but hey, I’ll take the compliment, it’s really sweet of you to say that.
So, what I was trying to say earlier is that the song Cowboy Like Me makes me think about these two fascinating characters, artists in their own right, but more like tricksters or con artists, really. They have this uncanny ability to make people fall head over heels for them, but it’s all part of the game. They use their charm to get what they want, whether that’s money, gifts, or just the thrill of pulling the strings. But then, the twist is that they try to play that same game with each other and end up falling for real. They both get caught in their own trap, which I think is just chef’s kiss 👌🏼 for the story I have in mind.
Here’s what I’m picturing: It’s the 1920s, right? The peak of glitz and glam, with jazz music spilling out of speakeasies and fashion that’s daring and carefree. I was thinking it would be set somewhere impossibly elegant, like the French Riviera or Monaco, those dreamy places where the rich and fabulous went to play. Mikasa would be this stunning flapper, effortlessly stylish and oozing confidence, the kind of woman who walks into a room and has everyone’s attention without even trying. Meanwhile, Eren would be the male equivalent of a flapper, if that’s even a thing, suave, sharp, and so dangerously charming that people (women) can’t help but fall under his spell.
Both of them are hustlers at heart. They’ve learned how to play the game, how to make people fall for them and, in the process, loosen their purse strings. They’ve each perfected the art of seduction, not because they’re romantics, but because it’s a way of surviving, thriving even, in a world where money equals power. Love? That’s a weakness neither of them has time for.
The story kicks off in this ridiculously extravagant hotel, all marble floors and glittering chandeliers, where the elite are hosting some grand affair. Mikasa and Eren are both there as the “plus ones” of two very wealthy patrons, essentially escorts, but in that subtle, 1920s way where it’s all about appearances. They notice each other almost immediately. Maybe it’s a glance across the ballroom or an accidental brush past each other, but there’s this instant connection. Not love at first sight, though, it’s more like they recognise each other. Like, “Ah, here’s someone who knows the same game I’m playing.”
That’s when the fun starts. They begin this cat-and-mouse game, trying to outdo each other. Mikasa might flirt her way into stealing a target Eren was working on, just to prove she can, while Eren might turn the tables and sabotage one of her schemes with an infuriating grin. They’re constantly trying to one-up each other, and the tension between them is just electric.
But here’s where it gets interesting, they can’t stop thinking about each other. At first, it’s curiosity. Who is this person who’s as clever and sharp as I am? Then it’s attraction, though neither of them would ever admit it. They’re both too guarded, too used to seeing love as a tool or a weapon, to recognize that what they’re feeling is different.
The story builds with these playful, charged interactions. Maybe they share a dance at one of the hotel’s grand parties, where they both drop their masks for just a moment, caught up in the music and the closeness. Or maybe there’s a quieter scene, where they find themselves alone after a successful scheme, and the conversation turns unexpectedly real. They start to see beyond the game, catching glimpses of the person underneath the charm.
And the ending? It’s not a dramatic declaration or a perfect happy ending, it’s more like this subtle, bittersweet realization. They’ve been playing with each other all along, testing and teasing, but somewhere along the way, they stopped pretending. They actually fell for each other. It’s a little bit of a “whoops, we’re in love now” moment.
What do you think, Anon? I even have the name for this LOL “Gardens of Babylon” named in the song!
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If it's ok I have some thoughts about that post about whiteness you just reblogged. Parts of it are good but I do feel it's too usamerican centric. Not in a "hur dur us europeans are better and racism isn't real here" way but because the explanation they partly give for white supremecy is a lack of identity/culture and as someone who grew up in a european country that has a strong sense of identity it doesn't explain the rampant white supremecy issues we also have here. I think it's a big blind spot and that its a dangerous fallacy. I'd love to hear your thoughts
I mean, yes and no. The loss of culture bit as an excuse is definitely American, though I assumed the post was primarily talking to white Americans. Because there was a trade off when they all came to colonize here. It's a lot easier to convince poor white migrants that "hey at least you're white" when you tell them to give up everything about themselves to make sure they don't bond with the local oppressed people of color and revolt. So that did happen, on purpose.
The thing about whiteness being an identity of power to band behind is pretty universal, though. It's why when you put a bunch of Europeans from different nations together, they'll squabble like a mf. The Brits and French thinking they're better than Irish and Italians, who think they're better than the Polish and Greeks, and whatever combo.
But the MOMENT you put someone that visibly isn't them (i.e. not white) in the room, that bond of whiteness clicks. That hierarchy snaps into place, that "I might not be as white as you, but I'm CERTAINLY not them". It's how you end up with people who are afraid of dying in Ukraine under Russia's thumb somehow having time to still hate Black migrants and aid workers. Everyone might not know who they are, but they sure know who they aren't. And that's part of the allure and power of whiteness, and thus white supremacy.
But that's me. There are people who could probably explain it better.
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Summed up in two images:
Part of it might be the hipster urge to go "um ackshually," but for me personally, it's being sick of seeing Lancelot everywhere even when it doesn't make sense for him to be there and how gassed up he continues to be after a literal millennium.
My problem with Lancelot is twofold:
1.) He usurps the roles of other characters, including Arthur himself.
Cai was once Arthur's right-hand man, a loyal and shrewd if sarcastic guy, but Lance's influence slowly flanderizes him into a buttmonkey (Percival knocks him out for merely startling him and Gawain's like "welp" as he lays there unconscious) that is so coarse and lacking in manners that Arthur chides him for it. Really ironic, considering it's Arthur who insults Cai into leaving forever in Culhwch and Olwen.
Bedwyr was Cai and Arthur's steadfast companion, a handsome one-handed knight skilled in battle.
However, whenever authors want to include a cheating subplot without revealing too much of an attachment to French romances, they simply hollow Bedwyr out and make Lance's spirit possess him instead:
Which is an insult to Bedwyr's original character, and doesn't even make logical sense since A.) a casual reading of Culhwch and Olwen will reveal that Cai and Bedwyr were hella gay for each other:
...and B.) Cai's right there? Gwenhwyfar sings his praises in The Dialogue of Melwas and Gwenhwyfar?
https://www.maryjones.us/ctexts/melwas.html
Llacheu, Arthur's son, is implied to be a fine warrior and one of the island's best naturalists alongside Gwalchmai (Gawain). He gets sidelined because Lancelot needs to be the big hero:
Arthur himself used to be Britain's resident ass-kicker until Lancelot's inclusion necessitated that he assume the role of a passive cuck. Because twagedy.
tl;dr Classic Gary-Stu being so awesome and important that the narrative makes everyone else look like a weenie problem.
Spicy take incoming, but retelling the same cuckoldry tale over and over again for 900 years and pretending it's hot shit this time around because the anachronistic French knight running around Britain circa 530 AD (Norman invasion whenst?) is now smeared in mud or the cheating is moved two inches to the left isn't creative. I don't find it particularly new or exciting whenever the narrative feels the need to include it just to include it for sake of audience recognition, especially if it shrugs and sighs "Arthur's not even pressed about it." What's the point, then?
It's tedious. It's tiresome. I get bored just thinking about it.
And that's before all of Lancelot's self-flagellation.
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2.) Lancelot has little reason to be in Welsh tellings, yet authors are so attached to this one plot thread of "best friend betrays the king by sleeping with his wife" that they cannot let it go for the life of them.
This drives me up a freaking wall. Even Arthuriana that purports to be historical or more grounded in Welsh tales cannot help but include Lancelot, such as Bernard Cornwell's novels or the 2004 Clive Owen movie.
Even in iterations where he's not there in the flesh, he's there in spirit, latching onto the closest analogue, because obviously we have to have a cheating subplot. /s
I'm of the firm belief that cheating is not a necessary element to paint the chain of events that culminate the Battle of Camlan as a tragedy. There are many equally relevant elements worth fleshing out and exploring, such as the blow Medrawt struck the queen (Welsh Triads), the messenger Iddawg stoking war by ferrying false messages between Arthur and Medrawt (Dream of Rhonabwy), or the climate shift that resulted in the year 536 AD being "the worst year to be alive" and possibly driving everyone mad with hunger and plague (Annales Cambrie).
Within that context, and considering how 537-539 AD is commonly given as the year in which Camlan occurred, suddenly Arthur and Medrawt eating all the food at their respective courts doesn't seem so cartoonish.
What was that experience like? No? we're just gonna have another cheating rerun? okay well fuck me then lmao
all yall that dont like lancelot im curious why
i feel like its a really common opinion and im not really sure why? so like. if u dont like lancelot reblog /reply with why
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you say machete has to be closeted then why's he always wearing them little heels
Maybe he thinks he's a tiny bit nicer looking in them.
#no in fact he's just a little ahead of the curve let me try to explain#again I'm not a historian I'm just sharing what I've read I might be misremembering stuff so don't quote me on this#high heels became extremely fashionable in the early 1600's probably just a few decades after Machete's time#and they were originally worn by men#because they were inspired by Persian riding boots#if your shoes had heels you'd have easier time keeping your feet in the stirrups (think of cowboy boots)#Europeans saw them thought they looked snazzy and they became wildly popular in noble circles fairly quickly#for some hundred years or so high heels were the epitome of class wealth power and status and they were essentially genderless#remember that concepts of masculinity and femininity are fluid and change over time#things that were seen as manly a few centuries ago may seem downright effeminate to a modern viewer#it's all matter of perspective neither is objectively more correct than the other#they started to separate into men's heels and women's heels around mid 1700's iirc but the changes weren't massive even then#and only truly went out of vogue when the French Revolution hit in 1789#and people all across the continent were suddenly put off by everything that reminded them#of the frivolousness and extravagance of royalty and aristicracy#so in his canon timeline I don't think people are looking at him and going “hmmm that's pretty gay”#because heels hadn't become gendered yet#maybe he likes how they accentuate his already tiny paws and make his legs look even longer than they are#he's interested in fashion or at least likes to dress nicely in high quality garments#he tries very hard to look his best despite never really feeling comfortable in his skin#he was a real shrimp as a kid and even though he eventually grew up to be a beanpole he might still find the extra height appealing#no one's going to look down on him ever again#I admit the way I draw them is a lot more modern than the true historical style at the time but not outrageously so#artistic freedom and all that in the end I'm not aiming for 100% accuracy#modern au Machete has no excuses though he's just a little bit fruity#if the guy feels empowered by wearing little clip cloppers let him#answered#anonymous#Machete
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realized something earlier today. you know that trope where bilingual characters in fiction will sprinkle their native language into english sentences? and how i personally, while i can't speak for every bilingual person on the planet, don't really see that happening in reality pretty much ever, at least not with people who are passingly fluent in english? anyway i realized i DO mix languages, just the other way. i will happily throw english words and phrases into my daily speech when chatting with my peers in norwegian or czech like it's no biggie. because we all know english here, so it makes sense to swap in words if i'm falling short! but why would i say words other people don't understand in conversation...!
#nor do i add norwegian words when speaking czech or vise versa UNLESS im talking to my mom who knows both#idk maybe im just pointing out the obvious#i just always found it odd how many people will portray bilingual characters by making them mix languages all the time#like im sure someone out there does that. surely. i just haven't met them#post brought to you by: i read the sunshine court the other day and im so glad jean feels plenty French#without saying french phrases all the time like he's in a fanfic. thank u nora sakavic
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I admire girls who can pull off long nails bc it literally can never be me. I just don’t get how it works functionally
#I’m my mother’s daughter and she’s a very simple/sticker to classics kind of person#so my manicures typically tend to just be short dark solid gel sets. french tips if im feeling crazy but it’s rare#I’ve never tried the crazy long nails people do bc HOW#im studying all the time / doing research / at the clinic etc etc so it just wouldn’t work for me to begin w#but I don’t get how even girls who don’t have those duties can juggle their day to day lives w 6 inch long nails#they look GOREOUS but so impractical#it’s an actual art I think#p
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Okay guys buckle up it's Fangs yap time again
If you also like marauders I apologize I do have some marauders rooted head canons in here
I make mood/vision boards I use in my Tik Toks and they all have hidden head canons so finally my time to talk about them
Teddy Lupin
He definitely collects CDs and also burns and makes his own CDs. He also collects those pin buttons especially the space and NASA ones. He loves gummies, it got to the point everyone has a bag on hand if they know he's coming because they'll just end up at the store anyway if they don't have some. He plays guitar and he'll sometimes burn CDs and make some with his own music. He occasionally gives these to his friends and loved ones. I also think people tell him a lot that he looks like his mom and has her soul and has his dad's heart.
Victoire Weasley
Loves those healthy breakfasts like oatmeal and smooth bowls and always reads a book while eating or she's outside or looking out the window just enjoying nature. LOVE taking pictures she always has a camera on her and has memory cards full of her and teddy. Has a trinket box she decorated when she was like 11 and adds trinkets all the time. Loves those beaded and braided bracelets but she hasn't figured out how to completely master it so her sister makes them for her. And you see how her and teddy have flowers in their pockets? Yeah they pick flowers and put them in their pockets then they'll go back inside and make cute little crafts or add another page to a scrap book
Dominique Weasley
She has darker red hair but has blonde streaks. Loves to draw and write she has journals filled with drawings and writings it's all cluttered together but perfectly together that it's still extremely organized. Loves donuts especially the kind of ones in the picture. Has a strict skin care routine and night routine that she has to go through with doesn't matter the time as long as she does it before bed. She loves Paris she prefers it over any other place. When they visit she lives in the moment every second. She has a big fluffy white dog she takes every where don't ask why but she definitely does. She's definitely the "cold" sibling and has some depression (self projecting 🤞)
Louis Weasley
He definitely prefers to read in French and always picks up at least 5 books every time they visit Paris. Loves fruit he can eat it all day everyday and loves coconut water? Idk man that's just what I'm getting. Wears a lot of rings strictly only silver. He also prefers Paris over anywhere else. He's definitely closer to Dominique they're always together especially after vic started hanging out with Teddy more (it's ok tho they love him and understand). He absolutely loves Dominique's dog, basically just both of their baby
James Sirius Potter
Bro falls asleep constantly, if he's sitting down and starts reading or is being read to he's just out like a baby. He LOVES vinyl and is constantly trying to find his favs on it. He definitely started loving it after Harry decided to give him some of Sirius' old ones and some of his dad's he found. He doesn't play guitar but he collects guitar picks because he thinks they're cool. It started after teddy would give him his old ones after he would get new ones. Obviously he plays quidditch and he loves it. As much as he loves playing it I think he enjoys it more watching it and cheering. He definitely has a golden retriever that he's had since he was like 12. Just like Harry gets people saying how much he looks like his dad James gets the same thing but it's always oh you look just like Harry...and he looks like his oh my you're just like them both and he doesn't get sad about it he smiles big every time and says thank you they're the best guys I've known and heard of
Albus Severus Potter
(side note I saw someone head canon a name change of Cedric Remus potter. Idk how I feel about it but maybe some one would like it)
He has a pocket watch that belonged to regulus all though Harry thought it was Sirius' because he would carry it around all the time. He loves sketching out mythical creatures and plants, also putting samples of leaves or fur or scales if he has any, and basically making his own magic guide books. He would wear headphones a lot or have them on his neck if they had them. He collects a shit ton of crystals and pretty much any little witch trinket from muggle spiritual shops (can't remember the name rn even though I literally go to them all the time) has Altoids tins or something adjacent and puts things he might use for spells be might find useful and keeps them in his bag or Pocket. Has a black cat that he got from the shelter when James got his dog, he originally didn't want one he just was excited about a dog being in the house but he saw the cat and she was the runt and stayed away from the rest and he just felt something about her so he asked and ofc they got her
Lily Luna Potter
She loves fairy tales and loves the older style books because they're GORGEOUS so ginny always gets one when she finds them thrifting. When ginny gets new makeup or doesn't feel like something she got fits her she'll give it to Lily to use for fun because Lily likes to paint with them or just color things but she'll keep the red pallets to practice with. Her and Harry will pick little flowers on the side of the sidewalk on walks then go home and dry them in books and Lily tacs them on the walls of her room and Harry has some all over him and Ginny's room. Lily has colorful succulents everywhere and always comes home with some because professor Long bottom always gives her herbology plants. She definitely has that dog i saw her and was omg your definitely lily's. They just fit each other's vibe so well, I think she got her for Christmas one year. She also looks scarily like Lily when she was her age and people say it all the time and Lily also doesn't mind because she thinks Lily was absolutely pretty
Scorpius Malfoy
He definitely reads fantasy books like LOTR religiously. I like to believe teddy sometimes visits with them because they're family and it was dracos idea. So one year teddy gave him a ds and he was OBSESSED. He definitely makes those decorative tube jars with flowers and bugs that are naturally preserved and has them around his room. This also isn't on the board but I think his ceiling has constellations on it and it has Sirius, regulus, draco, and Scorpius up there so in away he had family there. He definitely got the tin idea from Albus but instead put things he loves in there and puts it in his pocket or bag. There's no way he doesn't like those little calico critters he definitely has some. He also got a golden retriever puppy after the whole time travel stuff
Delphi Riddle
(side note don't come after me for adding her this happened on tik tok I think she's a very interesting character and like to look into that. I'm not saying I like her I just like interesting characters.)
Gets nose bleeds a lot especially when she's reading while she's stressed so she has a lot of stains in her books. Prefers to just light candles instead of turning on a lamp It's easier on her eyes because she's constantly getting headaches and she likes to be extra and edgy. Has a pet snake or two I feel like that's a given. She collects snake skin and preserves snakes in jars if she finds them so they can still live in memory. She just has a weird connection with snakes just like her father. Has her father's and mother's jewelry that she wears all the time. She's constantly trying to look in the mirror and see them because she WANTS to be them. She's not worried about being them that's her greatest wish
I will have to do another part because I can't fit all the Weasleys on here but I'll work on more boards because I haven't gotten to anyone else but who's on here and the Weasleys yet but hopefully you enjoy my yap session. If you couldn't tell I'm extremely ill and autistic about the wizarding world (BUT FUCK JKR)
Chat I keep thinking about Harry Potter next Gen and I just want that fandom to be as good as the marauders please can we build it 😭🙏🙏🙏
I WILL start building it myself I already have headcannons
#harry potter next generation#harry potter#harry potter and the cursed child#albus severus potter#scorpius malfoy#scorbus#delphini riddle#victorie weasley#teddy lupin#louis weasley#dominique weasley#lily luna potter#james sirius potter#the maruaders#regulus black#james potter#lily evans#sirius black#remus lupin
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ok ok I like and prefer older brother America
But i love and am obsessed with older sister America
#It makes me have so many feelings#like a relatively young??America being left alone to protect and fend for her feral little French brother all while facing the world as a#young looking immortal female nation?? whos' people have already chased her down and killed her at least once#how she had to grow up so much faster then even Alfred did#how all she wanted to do as a young colony/girl was protect her little brother from feeling anymore sadness and from seeing the pain she#is experiencing due to being a young woman/girl#parentification being a direct result of Arthurs sexism and the gender norms of the time#she grows to resent her role as her brothers caregiver but LOVES him so much since he really is her only family#it breaks her heart to finally put herself and her people first#she hides so much of her experience from him just so she can protect him but like it ends up causing problems cus he is big time confused#uggg many thoughts#nyo america#hws canada
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maybe i am too disabled for this
#it's been A Week#monday i was riding the high of my advisor saying that there are support options for me on my year abroad#and since then i've been hit w big speaking problems and i sound stupider than normal in french*#*this is purely self critical - i don't think anyone else w speaking problems sounds stupid it's just cus it's me yknow#it's what i say not how i say it i'm not any less good at french blablablablabla etcetc#but like in a degree and year abroad programme which is ultimately assessed through level of spoken language i feel so behind#today at language cafe i was chatting w this one guy in the year below me which was nice but then all of a sudden 3 near-natives/natives#joined the table and the 4 of them were yapping away and i was following near perfectly but i felt unable to jump in cus it would be#disruptive and a couple times when people turned to me and asked basic qs and i took 2+ mins to answer and then they'd turn back to each#other and keep yapping about their fav cuisines and french cheeses#idk man i'm so tired of being seen as Less and every time smth like this happens i feel like it's more and more true#is it really such a surprise that someone w a severe speech impediment does a languages degree for the love of it despite the Horrors#i'm stressed w assignments atm i'll get over it but atm: :( maybe i should talk to my disability advisor about this just for a vent#ellis exclaims
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baking never feels more like science to me than when i'm trying to cobble together an intricate multi step recipe together from several different recipes and tutorials online because the recipe I'm imagining doesn't exist....
#genuinely feels like a science experiment making something fancier than a frosted layer cake#have to do all kinds of volume and weight conversions because one recipe is japanese and the other is indian and the other is english lmfao#none of the recipes are probably the exact volume I need so i might have to make some minis with my extra stuff#i have to find a very precise sheet pan size tomorrow for the patterned cake i'm gonna use as the outer bit#otherwise i'll have to make my own from parchment paper??? or tin foil??? man idk.....#i had to write out all of my instructions and ingredient lists so i don't have to go between 6 different websites tomorrow/sat#i had to do research on fucking. gelatine 😭because it's impossible to find gelatine sheets here and they're used in EVERY mousse recipe#and there's apparently a huge debate on what the ACTUAL conversion of sheet gelatine to powdered gelatine is for baking#I also had to type up like an exact order to make each component because most need a significant amount of cooling time#grayson im gonna try my hardest to make you this fancy ass lemon cake and i pray i succeed this time where i failed on my own birthday#2 yrs ago but also i think this will go better bc i'm not doing a jelly insert or a candied mirror glaze#I'm also making my own candied lemons and lemon curd even though i don't have to#mostly because i wanna try doing it and the sheer power of getting to say i made the whole thing from scratch *#minus the actual cake mix because i don't have a good from scratch cake track record and box mixes are so so reliable#and i have too many moving parts to worry about finding a new cake recipe#every fucking cake recipe now is a fucking genoise sponge for SOME REASON#which is NOTORIOUSLY DIFFICULT AND A HUGE PAIN IN THE ASS BECAUSE IT USES NO RISING AGENTS#i want to throttle whoever it was that made online recipe people turn to only using variations of a genoise sponge for their cake recipes#honestly i need to maybe join the baking subreddit and ask for some good old baking/cookbooks with reliable baking recipes#ones that aren't crazy labor intensive for fucks sake i'm not a french patisserie#my stuff#it would be cool to one day have baked enough and have enough know how of how standard baking recipe components work#so i can just come up with my own recipes on my own#and just use whatever flavors i want#i feel like i would enjoy being a baker except if i had to make wedding cakes
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I'm gonna be so honest, I'd wanna be an understudy above anything else. Like it would be so fun to play different people every evening, and also I think I'd be able to play a few different people. If we say that I get to rehearse for those few weeks/months, but I don't actually improve in any meaningful way between now and opening night, I think I could play Noel, Constance, Jane, and possibly Ricky? Ricky is like 50/50, but I have such good ideas that I wanna keep him on this list anyway. TO THE CHARACTERISATION IDEAS:
Noel Gruber:
I'd keep my long hair for this role. Somewhere way back I reblogged someone's post about Noel having long hair, and my addition to it was the symbolism it could hold, but even just to have it for Noel's Lament would be awesome.
More feminine voice + French accent for Monique's character in Noel's Lament. Mostly for the fun of it, but I could add some feeling in there. There are certain lines where I'd obviously go back to Noel's voice (eg. “I want to be that fucked up girl”) and that would also give me the opportunity to do it elsewhere too. Imagine blending from Monique to Noel during “Just to somehow prove I'm still alive”.
Subtly (or maybe not-so-subtly) staring at Mischa during This Song Is Awesome when he rips open his shirt.
Also staring at Ricky after the outfit change in Space Age Bachelor Man. You know, it's a real shame that he's the only gay guy in Uranium City, cos all the men around him are kinda hot.
He is so uncomfortable during The New Birthday Song. He actually wants to just sink through the floor. But he can see how much this means to Jane, so he's doing it anyway.
Also really uncomfortable during the scene directly after TNBS. Mostly because he hasn't had a one-on-one conversation with another man in years without someone calling them both gay. He is just hyper alert the whole time. At the end, he has to look around the warehouse several times before deciding that no one is watching, and he can lay his head on Mischa's shoulder without judgement.
Goes to hug Constance before her moment with Ocean after Sugar Cloud. This man has come to Constance's defense the whole musical, he isn't gonna not comfort her after that.
Him and Ocean hold hands during It's Not A Game/Just A Ride, like when they're all standing in a row? He totally acts like she's given him cooties the first time she reaches for his hand though. Then he actually grabs her hand and it's all sweet.
Constance Blackwood:
Jane Doe:
I have hypermobile shoulders, so I can kind of make it look like my head is detached. I will abuse this for Karnak's Dream Of Life. And maybe the rest of the show, I think it would be a funny gag to have her head fall off and to have her just instinctively catch it before it completely goes (cos obviously my head can't come clean off, I'm not that good)
Hypermobility would also be fun for the rest of her doll-likeness. Like imagine at some point in The Ballad Of Jane Doe having her collapse in on herself like a ragdoll.
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Ricky Potts:
i have a fun question for people!
if you had to put on/be in a production of rtc from now (with same the amount of time to prepare as any production would, starting today) but you still only have your own current skill level, who would you play and how would you do it?
this is more directed towards people who don't have much or any theatre experience because it's fun to think about but anyone can answer, im just curious :D
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