#is it wrong to tag so much? I feel guilty

[thoughtlesssadness]

In the tags:

There is so much I love and agree with here. Your takes on reciprocity especially , and how the symbolism just works so much better, the story threads would feel more tied in. The story still seems built around this original, omitted idea.

In the story we got. Hiccup keeps slipping on his prosthetic which symbolizes that he needs Toothless.

But if the mummified leg wasn’t “cut” from the story, it would also motivate Toothless to bring him back the old leg that worked. Thus one idea would serve multiple functions, adding cohesion.

If I could add. The scene where Hiccup gives Toothless the new tailfin. To me Toothless’s reaction read as a bit conveniently overdramatic?

Toothless figures out what the tail and looks at Hiccup, eyes narrowing. Hiccup takes a step forward and Toothless flinches away before booking it.

Booking it to apparently, find Hiccup’s helmet. Which, you know, is very important, it was made from his mother’s breastplate and all - but to leave so suddenly your friend thinks you might be running away from him? It’s a lot.

I’ve heard the interpretation that maybe at first Toothless really was feeling the “call of the wild” the other dragons did. He just, couldn’t find another night fury so found Hiccup’s helmet instead. I don’t like this interpretation. But it seemed a little more in line with how the scene played out.

But if instead, you could read it like Toothless realizes what Hiccup has given him, that Hiccup has ‘fixed’ him, and is so overwhelmed (and mayhaps guilty), that he needs to, immediately, instinctively, fix him right back. Right the wrong of ‘failing’ to save his leg.

Well I can just see it a lot better. It would feel more in line with Toothless.

THE SHIT (GOLD) YOU FIND IN THE OCEAN (YOUTUBE COMMENT’S SECTION)

[trilliumszz]

alnst as gacha screenshots

Og images under cut 👍

[angelsdean]

ruthlessly deleting old 2021/2022 posts (not by me) from my dean studies tag like *click* un-incorporating that from my beliefs system! also the way SO many posts have me like ok uh-huh good aaand then say one completely wrong thing that loses me. it's so many posts.

[marshmellowtea]

a lot of post-coup fan content seems to revolve around chris's relationship to robert and/or trevor which makes sense but i'm chrissandra-pilled so i can't stop thinking about that particular betrayal, especially with my headcanons for them.......chris has only recently started hesitantly letting her back in, he thinks that for sure she will back him up here, only for his heart to sink when he learns she was on board with this too.........she knows what robert's like, just as much as he does, so it hurts that she'd willingly go along with him, that she'd choose him over chris, especially knowing how much directing means to him..........

when he asks she tries to brush it off with well, we just need a change, that's all, i thought maybe we could give him a shot but the damage is done, she's just fed into his fears that she's never actually respected or liked him and this whole time she's been thinking of him of, at best, someone to laugh at behind his back, that what they're doing here at cornley isn't real, that it's just a stepping stone in her journey to stardom........sandra doesn't mean all that, of course, she's just frustrated with how badly their plays go like the rest of them, but with this one gesture she's awakened chris's trust and abandonment issues that led to the bitterness and resentment that nearly caused him to leave them the first time around, except this time he's internalized it into a quiet self hatred and a begrudging acceptance that no one at cornley actually likes him, and she's horrified by the thought that she helped contribute to that......

[autism-swagger]

Tara headcanons :3

(it's literally just angst. Blame @lionydoorin for making me have Tara thoughts)

She can't stand the smell of cooking meat anymore. It reminds her of Amber.

After Sam left, there wasn't anyone buying groceries on a regular basis. She never starved, but there were many occasions where she went to bed hungry.

She doesn’t remember most of the night her dad left (or even the man himself for that matter). She tried to grab him as he was leaving, but he shoved her off. She slammed her head on the corner of the wall really hard, and ended up with a scar on her forehead, chronic psychosomatic migraines, and tinnitus.

She'll avoid going to the hospital unless she absolutely has to. Not only does it reminds her of being attacked, she was also a really sick kid, and she spent a lot of her childhood hospitalized. Even just going to the doctor stresses her out.

She's like. 70% stress and anxiety at any given moment. Seriously somebody get this girl some SSRIs before she has a heart attack.

Her leg and hand have permanent nerve damage, and her entire left arm is kind of fucked up after 6. She has a semi-permanent arm brace, a cane for her leg, and a whole lot of chronic pain.

Christina had a revolving door of boyfriends, and would bring them home sometimes. They were almost always awful to Tara.

She really misses Amber sometimes. She never tells anyone.

[redstringredeye]

My condolences to anyone who saw any of the FOURTEEN tmagp spoiler posts i queued for 8:30am, i s2g I thought we were still dropping at 8am PST I do NOT understand daylight savings

I AM AN EVIL LITTLE THING but I would not wish spoilers upon anyone, I’ve privated all of my posts and will unlock them at 9:30 :((

[thebigqueer]

2 years ago i fucked up a friendship w a girl (that im pretty sure i was in love with). to this day i think of her and sometimes when i see her on the street i just wanna cry. i understand your plight very much.

yeahhh man im sorry to hear that!!! it genuinely fucking sucks and i would never wish this upon anyone. cuz like it makes you fully think about all the what ifs and i genuilnely dont think ill ever find someone like her again

[dennisboobs]

i wrote another rambly dennis analysis and deleted it <3 y'all don't need that

[linagram]

[ 𝚙𝚛𝚎-𝚝𝟸 𝚟𝚘𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚍𝚛𝚊𝚖𝚊 #𝟶𝟸 ] 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚊𝚕

IT'S OFFICIAL THE SECOND TRIAL IS HERE BABYYYYY oh god now they're going to suffer even more

(Warnings: mentions of attempted suicide, physical violence (prisoners get injured and beaten up and also Eiji and Kei's relationship gets mentioned), toxic relationship dynamics and heavy implications of self-harm)

Miki: Eiji-san?..

Miki: Eiji-san, can you hear me?

Eiji: .. Ah, sorry.

Eiji: I just.. I was too deep in thought, I guess.

Miki: I-it's okay! I just didn't expect you to be the one getting distracted this time, haha..

Eiji: What was that?

Miki: N-nothing! 

Miki: B-but seriously, a-are you okay? You've been acting a bit weird lately..

Miki: Did something happen? Y-you can tell me!

Eiji: I'm fine. Don't worry about me.

Miki: .. If you say so.

Miki: So.. You know why we're here, right?

Eiji: .. Yeah. Because of the second trial.

Miki: *nods* I.. I thought it would be a good idea to talk about everything that happened after the first trial.

Miki: Would you be okay with that? I-if you're too tired, I completely understand-

Eiji: No, you're right. We do have to talk about it.

Eiji: There's.. a lot of things we have to discuss. 

Miki: Ah, do you want me to do most of the talking? I can do that-

Eiji: NO! 

Miki: *screams*

Eiji: .. Sorry.

Eiji: I will do it. You can just sit here.

Miki: U-um..

Miki: O-okay then..

*sounds of Eiji getting up*

*sounds of Eiji's footsteps*

Eiji: So.. Many of the prisoners feel like completely different people now. 

Eiji: Some of them are acting like the complete opposite of their past selves and some of them are acting like.. if you took their personality traits, even the good ones, and made them much worse.

Eiji: It doesn't even matter if they were voted guilty or innocent. All of them are equally bad. 

Miki: Eiji-san..

Miki: Are you saying our judgement was incorrect?

Eiji: .. I don't know.

Eiji: Maybe. 

Eiji: No, it would definitely be better if we just voted all of them guilty-

Miki: So that they could suffer even more?

Miki: Eiji-san, I respect you a lot.. 

Miki: But I think a lot of prisoners finally got the confidence they needed this way. They feel so much safer now too!

Miki: Who knows what they would do if all of them were voted guilty..

Eiji: I'm not just talking about their personalities, but their relationships too. 

Eiji: Those who were friends are basically enemies now or their relationships are just much more toxic now. 

Eiji: You know who I'm talking about, don't you?

Eiji: I mean, our relationships with the prisoners are different too now. 

Eiji: .. Let's begin.

Eiji: Prisoner 001, Miyagawa Akio.

Eiji: He got the well-deserved guilty verdict last time and his ideas and thoughts were rejected. Serves him right, honestly..

Eiji: I wish I could say that without feeling worried, but.. I can't do that because of what happened. 

Miki: .. So you are worried about him.

Eiji: Because he was voted guilty, I knew that I will have to punish him for his sins. At first I just wanted to beat him up, but..

Eiji: I-I guess I underestimated how passionate I am about that kind of stuff.

Miki: He got a head injury because of you, Eiji-san.

Miki: A really.. bad one.

Eiji: Guard 002, with all respect I have for you, you think it was bad just because there was a lot of blood-

Miki: ISN'T THAT ENOUGH FOR ME TO SAY HE WAS SERIOUSLY INJURED?

Miki: Miyagawa-san.. He got traumatized both physically and mentally after that.

Miki: If it wasn't for me.. If I didn't manage to stop you before it was too late..

Miki: I think you would have ended up killing him, Eiji-san.

Eiji: ...

Eiji: S-so what? He deserves to die anyway.

Miki: He's only 16 years old-

Eiji: Anyway, about his personality. Akio definitely feels like a different person now, but he still has many personality traits he had before all of this.

Eiji: As I said, his ideas were rejected. Which means we have basically told him.. 

Eiji:"You're not a king nor a god that you think you are".

Eiji: And considering that because of his head injury, it's much more difficult for him to do most things, now he feels like he actually isn't as smart and talented as he thought. 

Eiji: It's hard for him to walk without feeling dizzy and feeling like his head is spinning, so he often needs help when he has to go somewhere. 

Eiji: He's also a bit more quiet now, though he's still very loud whenever we try to talk to him. 

Miki: And for a good reason. You're the reason why he's like this now.

Eiji: Stop blaming me. I wasn't the only person who decided to vote him guilty. 

Eiji: If it really was the wrong decision, then it's our fault, not just mine.

Eiji: He's more quiet now mostly because it's harder for him to talk now. I also almost never see him reading or studying anymore. 

Eiji: .. I-I guess it really was a fitting punishment for a "genius" like him-

Miki: How can you say that?!

Miki: What if that injury really is serious? You know I can't take proper care of him, right? 

Miki: What if his life will get worse because of it? What if..

Miki: .. What if he will die if he doesn't get any help?

Eiji: All of them are going to be executed by me anyway, so-

Miki: HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT AFTER WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM??

Eiji: ...

Miki: .. You wanted to talk about everyone's relationships too, right?

Miki: Do it. Tell me more about them.

Eiji: .. Well, Akio never really had any friends in this place, though he could often be seen with Aimi and Riku. I assume it's because of them being high school students, so they got along well, since they all are almost the same age.

Eiji: But if Akio's verdict was "Guilty", Aimi and Riku, on the other hand, were forgiven. 

Eiji: And that has changed their relationship dynamic a lot. 

Eiji: You see, after being voted guilty, Akio started becoming more and more.. unstable. He claims that he hears someone's voice sometimes and he can even see that person. There was a time when Naomi told me that Akio couldn't sleep because he felt like he was being choked by that person. 

Eiji: Some prisoners also say that they can often hear Akio mumbling to himself and Aimi thinks that he's actually saying someone's name repeatedly. 

Miki: .. I-I think I know what's going on here.

Miki: I'm not sure about that voice he hears and that person who has tried to choke him, but.. What if he's actually saying the name of his accomplice?

Miki: That would also explain.. well, that incident.

Eiji: .. I'll ask Aimi to pay more attention to what he says. That information could be useful for us.

Eiji: Anyway, because Akio's hallucinations have started getting worse and worse, he couldn't take it anymore and ended up having a breakdown in front of all the other prisoners.

Eiji: And he tried to ask Riku for help and grabbed his hand and I don't know what exactly he said, since we arrived when it was too late, but Riku did not like it.

Eiji: I'll talk more about it later, but.. After that, Akio slowly walked back to his cell, even though it was still hard because of his condition and..

Eiji: *sighs*

Eiji: I'm assuming he tried to make his injury even worse by beating his head against the wall. 

Miki: .. You know that he had a reason to do that. And it wasn't just about "trying to make it worse". 

Eiji: Fine, what else do you want me to say? This guy is not doing well. That's it.

Eiji: Now, let's talk about the person who stopped him from doing that to himself when we weren't there. And also, the only person he can trust right now.

Eiji: Prisoner 002, Hanasaki Aimi.

Eiji: Ah, the poor girl who was bullied by her entire class. 

Eiji: She was voted innocent and her ideas and thoughts were affirmed.

Eiji: .. I still don't trust her.

Eiji: As I said, her ideas were affirmed, so I assumed that she will try even harder to make friends after this and she won't be so shy anymore..

Eiji: .. But she is actually much more quiet now.

Eiji: She still acts nice and she's still very polite, but now she doesn't really try to become friends with anyone in this prison.. except one person.

Eiji: And that person is Akio.

Eiji: She was the one who stopped him from basically killing himself and she's also the one who takes care of him, holds his hand when he's having trouble walking and I think I also heard her read a book out loud for him once. 

Miki: Isn't she so nice? I still don't understand how such a kind person like her can be a murderer-

Eiji: I wouldn't trust her so easily if I were you. Sure, she's nice to Akio now, but she stopped talking to Riku after she found out what he said to Akio.

Eiji: Just so you understand, she completely ignores Riku now. She doesn't even look at him.

Eiji: She's acting like this with some other prisoners too now: she tries to avoid Yurika and she has also called Asahi out once for his behavior.

Miki: But I think that's understandable?..

Eiji: What I'm trying to say is.. It's kind of interesting, don't you think? Aimi already knew that all prisoners are murderers and she already knew that they are not good people and they obviously have flaws, but when it was the first trial, she still insisted that she likes them all and wants to be friends with them.

Eiji: But now, she doesn't try to become friends with any of them except Akio, who also can't really do anything without her help anymore.

Eiji: .. I feel like I'm starting to see a connection here.

Eiji: Anyway.

Eiji: Prisoner 003, Ishizu Shun.

Eiji: Sadly, he was voted innocent, so his ideas and thoughts were affirmed.

Eiji: Come on, I know you regret voting him innocent.

Miki: .. W-what else was I supposed to do?..

Miki: If we voted him guilty, who knows what he would do and how he would act! 

Eiji: So you admit it? You admit that this guy is unpredictable? 

Eiji: So you admit that this guy is dangerous?

Miki: .. Ishizu-san is just.. 

Miki: .. He's just very hard to understand..

Eiji: He sure is more confident now thanks to his thoughts being affirmed. It's not a good kind of confidence, it's a very annoying kind.

Eiji: Also, is it just me or he doesn't care about his ex anymore?

Eiji: I mean, he openly flirts with both Kei and Eiko now, even though when Eiko herself said that she's interested in him, he rejected her since he's "taken".

Eiji: He also rarely mentions being in love with his ex and now he doesn't even say stuff like "I did this for her! I just wanted her back! I just loved her so much I had to kill her new boyfriend for her sake!"

Miki: Maybe he just.. forgot about it?

Eiji: I doubt it. Though I can't say that him being in love with her was an act, this guy's video showed that he really did care about her in his own twisted way.

Eiji: Although..

Eiji: We haven't actually seen her face. We've only seen her new boyfriend's face and that's it.

Eiji: Maybe we should make him talk more about that guy this time.

Eiji: And also.. now that he's more confident, he refuses to take no for an answer.

Eiji: .. Especially when it comes to Kei.

Miki: ...

Miki: Eiji-san..

Miki: Are you worried about-

Eiji: I'm not.

Eiji: I just find it disgusting how he started to take more and more advantage of Kei now that the guy can barely move. I don't remember him being so "dominant" before Kei got punished. 

Miki: .. So you are worried-

Eiji: I'M NOT!

Eiji: A-anyway, Shun and Eiko are much closer now since both of them were forgiven unlike Kei.

Eiji: .. And they sure like to remind Kei about them being "superior" to him all the time.

Eiji: .. I don't want to talk about him anymore.

Eiji: Prisoner 004, Chiba Naomi.

Eiji: She was forgiven and her ideas and thoughts were affirmed.

Eiji: I guess she's mostly fine, but still.. I feel like something is wrong here.

Miki: Why? Chiba-san is so nice and understanding and she always helps me out when I need advice.. 

Eiji: Just like Shun, she's much more confident now. And why would she start acting like that if she's truly sorry for her sins?

Eiji: She wanted us to vote her guilty, remember? I thought that she would ask us to rethink our decision, but no, she just accepted it and moved on. 

Miki: W-well, maybe she just.. you know, started to see her crime differently? Like, maybe she doesn't think it was that bad anymore?

Eiji: If she's not lying, her victim really was a child. Do you think it's okay to just go "Oh, maybe me killing that kid actually wasn't a big deal"?

Miki: But what if she had her reasons-

Eiji: I don't care about her reasons. She's a child murderer and her victim most likely was one of her students. And now she thinks that her crime wasn't even that bad and doesn't try to make us change our mind. 

Eiji: She says that she simply doesn't try to do it because "we're the guards, so we know what we're doing", but I know she's secretly happy that she got voted innocent.

Miki: .. Again, you're saying my decision was wrong?

Eiji: .. Um-

Eiji: I'm just saying that now we can see that Prisoner 004 actually wouldn't try to become a better person and she actually doesn't think that her crime was that serious. Voting her innocent helped us realize it, so.. 

Eiji: Maybe you were right in some way.

Eiji: Ah, and even though she's still acting like everyone's.. uh, mom, basically, her ideas were affirmed, so now she's more strict with the younger prisoners.

Eiji: If she sees someone misbehaving, she will tell them to stop it and if they don't, she might actually get angry at them. 

Eiji: Though she's mostly nice to all prisoners who are still kids.. except one of them. 

Miki: ...

Eiji: .. Yeah, I'm talking about Asahi.

Eiji: And even though I would gladly vote Naomi guilty this time, I support the way she treats Asahi. 

Eiji: Yes, I know that he's most likely your brother, but you have to admit-

Miki: I-I will talk to him about it, okay? I will.

Miki: I'll prove his innocence to you, Eiji-san. I'll prove that he really deserves to be forgiven.

Eiji: The next prisoner is-

Eiji: .. Prisoner 005, Sanada Kei.

Eiji: He was voted guilty and his ideas and thoughts were rejected.

Miki: .. I still have no idea how you just.. can be so cruel to him without feeling anything.

Miki: He's your brother! If I had to vote Yano-san guilty-

Eiji: Are you telling me someone like him deserves forgiveness?..

Eiji: Guard 002, he's the one who turned my life into a living hell. 

Eiji: He.. He always was weird. And I had to protect him from other kids and people in general because of that. 

Eiji: .. I remember him thanking me for that once. 

Eiji: But then something happened and.. He started beating me for no reason every single day after that.

Eiji: He actually almost killed me once, no, twice! Maybe even more times!

Eiji: He's literally the reason why my whole body hurts all the time, why don't you get it, Miki?! Who cares about him when my body will never truly heal and it's all his fault!

Miki: .. *sobs*

Miki: I'm sorry.. I really.. I didn't mean to..

Miki: It's just.. I'm used to trying to see the good in all people and..

Miki: I thought that maybe Kei-san still deserves forgiveness..

Eiji: *sighs* Listen, I can't deny that I kind of admire that trait of yours. 

Eiji: But Kei doesn't deserve any of your forgiveness and kindness. Trust me.

Eiji: .. He refused to believe that all of this was real and that he really is going to be punished until I actually came and.. well, gave him what he deserves.

Miki: I still remember his cries and how loud he screamed from all that pain.

Miki: But that's.. weird. I thought Kei-san was a much more..

Eiji: Same. Remember him saying that he's not afraid of pain and that he can handle it all or something like that?

Eiji: .. It turned out to be another lie of his. 

Eiji: He's so used to being the one who hurts people that he has no idea what to do when someone hurts him.

Eiji: "More pain means more love"? Sure, whatever you say, Kei. You agree with what our mother used to say only when you're the one who's inflicting all that pain.

Eiji: .. Something is bothering- um, I just find something very confusing though.

Miki: Really? What?

Eiji: For some reason, I noticed that Kei already had a lot of scars on his body even before his punishment. 

Miki: Wait, what?? W-were they bad? Why didn't you tell me?

Eiji: If I did, you would never let me punish him. 

Eiji: Even I got scared, but only a little bit.

Miki: .. Don't you feel at least a little worried for your brother?

Eiji: W-why should I care? Maybe someone just got "a bit too rough" with him or something, I don't want to think about it. It's none of my business.

Eiji: Anyway, Kei still hangs out with Shun and Eiko very often, but now it's not because he wants to. He can't even leave his cell without anyone's help because of how much pain he's in, haha..

Eiji: Ahem, so Shun and Eiko are the ones who drag him out of it and they just make him follow them around. Actually, I feel like now they spend even more time together compared to the first trial.

Eiji: But don't you even think that this guy is just a poor victim and we absolutely have to forgive him this time-

Miki: Should I remind you that he almost got beaten up because of Maruyama-san?

Eiji: I have no idea who I should believe, but she told us that he was acting creepy again and she wanted to defend herself.

Eiji: I don't trust her most of the time, but since it's Kei.. I can see him saying something and Yurika getting mad at him for that.

Eiji: If that was the case, I can't blame her.

Eiji: .. I still can't believe that he actually got saved by someone though.

Eiji: Prisoner 006, Yoshioka Eiko.

Eiji: She was voted innocent and her ideas and thoughts were affirmed.

Eiji: Well, she did thank us for forgiving her, but I'm sure she didn't actually care about her verdict. She's just not that kind of person.

Miki: She is.. very affectionate with you now because of you agreeing to vote her innocent.

Eiji: Yes, and I hate it.

Miki: "Do you though?.."

Eiji: However, I feel like she actually did change as a person.

Eiji: She openly admits that she likes Kei and Shun only because of their appearance, but still keeps them close because she likes the attention she gets from them. 

Eiji: So it's like.. She said that she knows Kei will never "truly" love her and she also said that it would be easy to forgive her because of her looks, but now she agrees that she and Kei aren't actually that different.

Eiji: Also, even though she was one of those prisoners who refused to accept that all of this is a real thing, she has recently started asking me more questions about Milgram.

Eiji: Like, how it works, who created this place, why we were chosen as the guards, all of that..

Eiji: I have no idea why she's so curious about it now.

Miki: Maybe after the first trial was over, she started to realize that this isn't just a game and our verdicts really do have consequences?..

Eiji: Or maybe she just wants to spend more time with me.

Eiji: I don't get it though. I'm not that, uh.. "attractive" and I never give her any attention, so.. why me? Is it just her trying to make me forgive her again?

Eiji: .. No, she's not like most prisoners here.

Miki: But I think you're very pretty, Eiji-san!

Eiji: Um, thank you?..

Miki: Still not my type though.

Eiji: I wasn't even trying to.. never mind.

Eiji: Prisoner 007, Yano Asahi.

Eiji: He was voted innocent and his ideas and thoughts were affirmed. 

Eiji: And, well, he reacted to it just like a spoiled kid his age would.

Eiji: He thought that it was going to happen anyway and now he's sure that no matter what he does, he will still be forgiven, because.. you know, he's a child.

Miki: But isn't he right-

Eiji: Well, that's not gonna happen.

Eiji: I never judge anyone only based on their age. No matter how young or how old they are, I will make sure they will get the verdict that they deserve.

Eiji: And because all of them are murderers, all of them deserve to be-

Miki: I know, you don't have to say that again.

Eiji: .. Huh?

Eiji: U-um, okay, let's talk about how he acts now. 

Eiji: Prisoner 007 is much more confident now and I rarely see him cry or throw a tantrum, though he still likes to use his.. uh, "cuteness" to get what he wants. 

Eiji: However, he's now surprisingly good at controlling his emotions. I have no idea what happened to him, but he's much more polite now and I almost never hear him swear anymore. 

Eiji: Eh, he's probably just trying to manipulate us into voting him innocent again.

Miki: But what if he actually did change? What if he's trying to become a better person?

Eiji: I doubt it. He always has this.. weird smile on his face. Like I want to punch him whenever I see him smile like that.

Eiji: He keeps ordering other prisoners around too, again, he's just more polite about it now and it's harder to tell that he really is just using them.

Eiji: I should mention something about his personality and his relationship with other prisoners. Now that Akio is no longer as narcissistic as he used to be, Kei can't even leave his cell without anyone's help and.. we'll talk about Riku later, Asahi and Shun are basically the most "powerful" male prisoners now. 

Eiji: However, Shun is still disliked by mostly everyone and they don't really like Asahi either, but it's hard to deny that this kid is much better at making everyone believe that he has "changed" and that he really is more nice now.

Eiji: It's like.. this kid has all the power now. 

Eiji: "Andou siblings really rule this prison now, don't they?.."

Miki: W-well, I wouldn't say that.

Miki: True, he is much.. uh, "nicer" now and people are starting to like him a bit more, but he's still just as vulnerable. 

Miki: Like.. For some reason I'm starting to feel like he wants more attention from me now? Like now he requests even more things, but he always asks me to get him something and not you.

Eiji: "I think it's because the prisoners don't like me that much in general."

Miki: But when you don't count all the food, toys, clothes and other things, he just.. wants to spend time with me. Like he actually wants to know more about me and he keeps asking me so many questions..

Miki: .. It's still hard for me to get used to him calling me "Miki-nee" though.

Miki: He doesn't even know that we're most likely related..

Miki: And speaking of him still being one of the most vulnerable prisoners, Kei-san wasn't the only prisoner Maruyama-san has attacked.

Miki: Yano-san was her victim as well.

Eiji: Again, it's kind of justified. Naomi said that she saw everything with her own eyes and I usually don't trust her, but I will do so this time. 

Eiji: Basically, Asahi's been taking full advantage of Yurika's status as a guilty prisoner and her punishment and he eventually got tired of his "good boy" act and he spilled some really hot tea that she made for him on her. He claimed that it was an accident but both Naomi and Yurika could tell that it wasn't one. 

Eiji: Yurika had enough and, well.. decided to take her anger out on him. 

Eiji: I stopped her before she could actually injure him though. He only got a cut on his cheek from her nails and that's all.

Miki: Thank you, I appreciate it. 

Eiji: .. I-It's not because he's your brother. I would do the same thing even if it wasn't Asahi. I can't let those prisoners fight each other like that.

Eiji: *laughs* Though of course they would try to do that. They are murderers after all.

Eiji: Speaking of Yurika..

Eiji: Prisoner 008, Maruyama Yurika.

Eiji: She was voted guilty and her ideas and thoughts were rejected.

Miki: I'm still finding it so hard to believe.. I mean, I thought she seemed like a nice person when I first met her.. 

Eiji: Is it just me or you voted her guilty only because of what she said about you that time?

Miki: .. I really do want to save everyone here.

Miki: And I will do anything to achieve my goal. 

Miki: *gets up* Who does she think she is to go and say that I'm just doing this to make everyone trust me?!

Eiji: Okay, okay, calm down.

Eiji: Fine, let's not talk about it. You have your reasons to vote her guilty and I have mine.

Miki: .. Y-you're right. Sorry.. *sits down*

Eiji: Her punishment was a bit different from Akio and Kei's punishments. It wasn't a physical one, it was more about.. mental pain, I guess? 

Eiji: Since her thoughts were rejected, she lost all the potential freedom she could get and now she's back to doing what she hates the most.

Eiji: She has to act as everyone's maid now.

Eiji: We don't have to bring anything to prisoners personally, we can just ask her or, you know, make her do that. She can also serve them food now.

Eiji: I know, that was very smart of me. Less work for us~

Eiji: .. I wish I could say that, but her temper is.. something.

Eiji: When I first told her about her punishment, she cried. Loudly. She cried like a little baby. 

Eiji: And when I tried to make her stop, she almost punched me, but oh well, she obviously wasn't able to do that.

Eiji: And now, whenever she refuses to listen to my orders, I just remind her that I can make her punishment even worse and she listens to me.

Eiji: But now her relationship with the prisoners is much worse. People either see her only as their maid, they think she's scary or they even find her annoying.

Eiji: She's used to be close with all the female prisoners, but now Aimi is one of the prisoners who thinks she's too dangerous, Eiko just makes her do everything for her and even though Naomi actually tried to be nice to her at first, Yurika wasn't as nice. Her relationship with Reina is.. complicated now.

Eiji: Prisoner 009, Kuroki Riku.

Eiji: He was voted innocent and his ideas and thoughts were affirmed.

Eiji: .. I still have no idea how you could have forgiven someone like him.

Eiji: He obviously just wanted to make us feel bad for him. 

Miki: Even if he did, he still was in pain and he needed help. If we voted him guilty, I think he would start acting even worse.

Miki: Just imagine what he would do if he found out that he was going to be punished!..

Eiji: But guess what? Now that his thoughts were affirmed, Akio almost killed himself because of him, Aimi left him and pretty much all prisoners don't want to do anything with him anymore.

Eiji: Because I remind you, this guy actually wanted his childhood friend to die. 

Eiji: Let's go back to his fight with Akio. Again, I still have no idea what Akio said to him, but I do know what Riku told him and what made Akio.. do what he did.

Eiji: After Akio said something that made Riku angry, Riku, just like a normal boy his age, said this:

Eiji: "Go and die then."

Miki: ...

Eiji: .. We shouldn't find Akio's suicide attempt surprising after this considering his mental state and how much he liked Riku. 

Eiji: So? Are you going to defend him this time too?

Miki: .. I will talk to him about it. Of course, he can't just say things like that, but I want to understand why he did it. 

Eiji: Well, I'm sure he will appreciate you still trying to defend his actions, because I remind you that this happened while all other prisoners were watching.

Eiji: And yeah, Aimi stopped seeing Riku as her friend after this. 

Miki: "She's a victim of bullying, of course she would leave him.."

Eiji: And all other prisoners kinda stopped talking to him after that. Their conversations are just really awkward now, especially because Riku still refuses to apologize for what he said and claims that it's all Akio's fault.

Eiji: He has no one to talk to anymore. Akio and Aimi are doing great without him, Shun is having way too much fun with Kei and Eiko, Naomi and Reina have no idea how to help him, Kei simply can't do anything for him right now, Eiko and Yurika don't care about what happens to him and Asahi says that he's "bad" so he doesn't want to spend time with him, though I'm sure he's doing it just to make him suffer.

Eiji: .. It's kinda interesting, actually. They know that every single prisoner here is a murderer, but they were mostly fine with that fact until now, when one of them has almost killed the other prisoner with his words.

Eiji: And.. he went back to his unhealthy coping mechanisms because of all of this.

Eiji: He's okay with doing literally anything to make people look at him, including hurting himself in different ways.

Eiji: I literally can't even leave him alone with a fork and a knife anymore and I have to watch him while he eats.

Miki: .. Again, I will talk to him about it. 

Miki: I want to save everyone in this prison. Especially Yan- 

Miki: .. I mean, my brother and Riku.

Eiji: And finally, the last one.

Eiji: Prisoner 010, Himura Reina.

Eiji: She was voted innocent and her ideas and thoughts were affirmed.

Eiji: Honestly, I think she's one of those prisoners who have changed the most.

Eiji: She's like a completely different person now.

Eiji: She's no longer pretending to be someone she's not. She almost never mentions the whole "I'm actually the most dangerous murderer in this prison" thing anymore. 

Eiji: She's also very.. calm now. To the point of showing almost no emotions.

Eiji: She doesn't make dumb jokes anymore, she doesn't say things like "Oh, I actually have more than 50 victims", she isn't that loud anymore.

Eiji: .. And she also was the one who protected Kei from being attacked by Yurika.

Eiji: If that doesn't prove that she has changed, I don't know what will.

Miki: .. What if she actually always was capable of that? What if she always could protect someone like that and we just didn't know?

Eiji: Well, I can't say anything about that.

Eiji: She and Kei are actually surprisingly close now. She's the only person here who isn't afraid of him and doesn't take advantage of his condition.

Eiji: I was shocked at first, but now that I think about it..

Eiji: It makes sense. Their personalities are actually very similar.

Miki: So that's why she's been asking me to take care of him so often lately.. 

Eiji: .. What surprises me the most is that Kei never flirts with her or tries to impress her. I guess it has an obvious explanation, but if we trust Yurika's words, he's still more than capable of being annoying in that way.

Miki: Well, maybe he just sees her as a friend? Isn't that nice?

Eiji: Don't say that. I can't imagine this guy having friends that actually like him.  

Eiji: She isn't that close with Yurika anymore and when I asked her about it, she sounded like she was.. disappointed in her? I guess she wasn't prepared to see the real Yurika.

Eiji: .. That's all I have to say.

Eiji: *sighs*

Miki: So.. Do you still want to vote all of them guilty?

Eiji: Why are you even asking me that? Of course I do. Actually, I want to punish them even more now that I've seen what kind of people they become after being forgiven.

Miki: But isn't it natural to start acting more calm or confident after being forgiven? 

Miki: Just like you said, their ideas and thoughts were affirmed. Of course, they think that they were the ones in the right now.

Eiji: .. I wanted to talk to you about something.

Eiji: You don't have to think too hard to notice that all, or at least, most prisoners like you much more than me.

Eiji: Most of those who were voted innocent are thankful to you for saving them and they're hoping to be forgiven this time again.

Eiji: And those who were voted guilty are this close to begging you to save them from me and forgive them.

Eiji: It's like..

Eiji: It's like you're a goddess of this place, haha..

Miki: .. Hehe, come on, I-I'm just doing my job..

Eiji: Don't try to forgive all of them this time though. Be more careful. They're obviously going to try and take advantage of your kindness.

Eiji: Now, let's go and interrogate-

Eiji: !

*sounds of Eiji falling on the floor*

Miki: Eiji-san!

Miki: A-are you okay?!

Miki: Are you hurt? What happened?

Eiji: .. W-why..

Eiji: Why is everything so.. blurry now?

Miki: Please, tell me if you're not feeling okay! We can just interrogate everyone tomorrow-

*sounds of Eiji trying to get up*

Eiji: I'm fine. I'm fine, I can do this. 

Eiji: H-huh?..

Eiji: "Why am I feeling so weak?.."

Miki: Eiji-san, your body is shaking. A-are you feeling any pain? Maybe discomfort?..

Eiji: I told you I'm fine! Let's just go and begin the second trial already-

Eiji: Ah-

Eiji: .. T-thank you.

Miki: If it wasn't for me, you would fall again!

Miki:*sobs* Eiji-san.. Please, just tell me what's going on..

Miki: I just want to help you!

Eiji: Guard 002, let me go.

Miki: I can't do that when you look like you're about to-

Eiji: JUST LET ME DO MY JOB, MIKI!

Eiji: WHY CAN'T I HAVE AT LEAST ONE THING I ACTUALLY ENJOY DOING? WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO RUIN EVERYTHING?

Eiji: I'M BASICALLY NO ONE BECAUSE OF YOU NOW, WHY DON'T YOU GET IT?!

Eiji: ...

Miki: .. Eiji-san? Eiji-san, can you hear me?

Miki: "I should let him have some rest.."

Miki: "What did he mean by me ruining everything though? Was he talking about everyone's verdicts?"

Miki: "I doubt that he's jealous of me being more respected by the prisoners or something like that.."

Miki: ".. I'm a goddess of this place.. What did he mean by that?"

Miki: "It doesn't sound bad though, hehe.."

Miki: "Trust me, Eiji-san, I will save everyone in this prison. I will forgive them for all their sins and I will guide them."

Miki: "I will save everyone, Eiji-san.."

Miki: ".. Including you."

***

???: Hm? 

???: What is going on with that screen?.. 

???: Ah, it's you!.. Sorry, I forgot your name again.

Jackalope: .. Maybe we should have chosen someone else. 

???: *laughs* You're right, you're right. 

???: No, seriously, I still don't understand why I was chosen. I mean.. 

???: Look at me. Why would you make someone like me the guard of this prison?

Jackalope: You're asking way too many questions for someone like you. By the way, I left your guard uniform at the door. You can go and get it, I'll open the door just this once.

???: Really? Okay..

*sounds of slow footsteps*

[ ??? opens the door ] 

???: Wow!..

???: .. I-it doesn't look that comfortable. 

[ ??? closes the door ]

???: And why would I even wear it? Didn't you say that I'm not allowed to leave this room?

Jackalope: True, but now you'll actually be able to participate in the trials. 

Jackalope: As always, you'll be able to see everything from here. You don't even have to leave.

???: .. Does that mean I can participate in the voting process too now?

Jackalope: Absolutely! You can even say hi to the other guards if you want. 

Jackalope: That girl is very cute, by the way, so I doubt that you'd want to lose your chance-

Jackalope: Wait, or are you-

???: Hmm, I think it will be too hard for them to accept the fact that there's a third guard hiding somewhere. 

???: .. I think I have an idea. You already did that thing to the first guard, right?

???: I think I know how I can interrogate the prisoners without letting the other guards know anything.

Jackalope: You remember that you still have to vote though, right?

???: I do, I do. Don't worry, I won't disappoint you~

???: *yawns* Sorry, looks like I've spent all my energy for today.

???: Hehe, I wish I had a stuffed animal that looked like you-

Jackalope: Don't even think about it. Cuddling with a guy? No thank you. 

???: Calm down.. You know I can't even be in the same room as you anyway.

???: But before I go to sleep, can you answer my question already?

???: Why was I chosen?

???: I mean, I can't even participate in this trial properly. I just spend all my time in this room. 

???: I'm also not that interested in "saving" or "punishing" those prisoners..

Jackalope: .. Well, let's just say that all guards have their reasons to be here.

Jackalope: That guy wants to see his brother in pain and he wants to get his revenge on him. The girl is harder to figure out, but I'm sure she has her goal too.

Jackalope: You also have a reason to be here. Why don't you think about it yourself?

???: Hm... 

???: Maybe you're right. 

???: Either way, I don't think I'll lose much if I participate in this thing.

???: I have nothing to lose anyway. 

[weimitsu]

Love being an artist bc i can just draw silly little snippets of things without having to justify them as a detailed story w consequences or i would go insane

[pictureswithboxes]

I cannot stand Miles (for the most part), and I’m so surprised by how well I write him. Because again, I do not care for this man.

[mrfoox]

Once I learn the difference between me having a crush and me being (hyper)fixated on a person, it's all over

[featherymainffins]

Why you all got ok mothers leave some for the rest of us

[yourlocalmissingtexture]

Feeling like I have a hundred obligations to attend to this morning but instead of figuring out what they all are or working on them I’ll instead be returning to safety under the blankets until I have to go to work

[sttoru]

𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃 𝐎𝐋𝐃-𝐅𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐃 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐎𝐘 !

⟣ sypnosis. you were curious if your boyfriend would pass a ‘loyalty test’ that you’ve seen on social media and you decide to see for yourself, only to discover something much more . . . heartwarming.

⟣ tags. gojo satoru x female reader. mostly tooth rotting fluff. talks about cheating / a sprinkle of trust issues from reader. the rest is satoru just being lovesick.

⟣ note. uhhhh… idk just a random idea i got at three am on a saturday night after being woken up from a nightmare >_< enjoy .

you don’t think satoru would actually ever cheat on you. your curiosity just got the best of you when you saw that one girl do a ‘loyalty test’ on her boyfriend. it was quite simple—testing if your partner would hand you their phone without being suspiciously defensive.

therefore you walked into satoru’s room and spotted him laying on his side, his back facing the door. he didn’t have any earphones in so you could hear the sounds of a movie playing on the phone he held in his hands.

he seemed so peaceful and content that you were already feeling bad for disturbing him with your silly test. you moved to sit on the edge of the bed and cleared your throat, making your presence known as if the sorcerer hadn’t sensed it moments ago.

“are you cheating on me?”

blunt and straight to the point.

satoru pauses the show on his phone and looks at you like you had said the most outrageous thing there is (to him, you really did). he drops the device on the bed and turns his body to face yours; “well—hello to you too, baby.”

he runs a hand through his hair before sitting up against the headboard with a raised brow, one hand cautiously reaching out for you. satoru was thinking about all the things he has said or done previously that could’ve possibly make you think he was screwing around behind your back. his mind worked fast, though he couldn’t come up with any logical explanation.

“answer my question please, ‘toru.” you mumble, feeling slightly guilty for doing this to your lover. you could see the confusion plastered on his face.

“no, i am not.” satoru shakes his head whilst holding your hand in his, thumb brushing against the back of it, “what makes you think that?”

you weren’t about to say ‘oh nevermind then! just a dumb thing that i saw on tiktok’—no, there was still one thing left to do. even if you’re so super sure that your boyfriend was hiding nothing from you. maybe there was an one in a million chance that your intuition was wrong. or maybe it’s just your underlying trust issues speaking.

“uhh, just wanted.. to check.. i guess?” you clear your throat and take a deep inhale before putting your hand out to satoru, palm up.

the white-haired sorcerer looks from your hand to you, and back. he doesn’t know what that indicated, so he takes a simple guess; satoru places his chin on your palm, giving you an amused kind of grin. you raise an eyebrow as he rests his head on your hand—which wasn’t what you wanted to gain from your gesture.

but you couldn’t blame him. it was cute that that was the first thing he thought of doing.

“you’re always welcome to check. got nothin’ to hide anyway.” he shrugs, not offended by your accusation in the slightest. you see the way his blue eyes look up at you—in a way that shows his pure, unadulterated adoration for you.

you nod and scratch satoru under his chin, to which he smiles and closes his eyes, enjoying the tingling touch, “then can i .. look through your phone?”

without an ounce of hesitation, he had placed his phone unlocked in your hand. satoru doesn’t care much about privacy anyway—you’re his girlfriend, you’re the only one allowed to know every single thing about him, “of course, baby.”

your eyes land on the screen and your jaw drops as you see his home screen; a picture of you up close, sleeping with your cheek squished against his arm, own hands resting near your head and . . . is that drool trickling down your chin?

“oops, sorry, you were too cute not to take a picture of.” satoru chuckles as he sees your reaction. he lays back on his side, elbow propped on the pillow with his head resting against his hand—watching you go through his phone with a relaxed look.

you roll your eyes playfully before starting your search. your finger swiped across the screen and landed on the messenger app satoru uses. you click on it and scroll through his chats, but don’t find anything out of the ordinary. he recently talked to you, his first year students, nanami and shoko.

you curiously tap on his chat with shoko and don’t read anything interesting at first glance. you scroll up and take note of how satoru was the one who kept most of the conversation going. shoko’s replies were much shorter and curt—straight to the point.

but then your eyes land on a conversation from two weeks ago. satoru had showed shoko a bunch of selfies you had sent him that same day. he was telling her how ‘cute’ and ‘pretty’ you were, practically bragging about you being his girl.

you scroll up some more and see that he’s done the same many times before; sending shoko pictures of you and kind of rambling to her about how beautiful you are.

shoko—being the good friend she is—indulged into his little lovesick ramblings and agreed with every thing satoru said—even complimenting your looks herself. you begun to get embarrassed at this unexpected revelation.

when going through more of his chats with other people, you realise how much satoru loves to talk about you. you couldn’t possibly count the many times satoru had refused invitations from his students or other friends simply because he wanted to hang out with you instead.

you discovered that he even skipped two or three important meetings at the school to go spend the day with you—nanami scolding him via text each time he did so.

“damn..” you murmur and glance up at your lover after closing his messaging app. satoru was staring right back at you with the biggest grin you’ve ever seen on him.

he wasn’t embarrassed about you reading some of those cheesy and sappy texts at all. in fact, he was happy. he wants you to know how much he loves you (as if he doesn’t show you exactly that every day of the week).

“go on, sweets.” satoru nods towards his phone, encouraging you to continue your inspection. your eyes dart back towards the screen and you shyly swipe and scroll some more, eventually ending up in his gallery.

the first things you noticed: two albums dedicated to you. all were filled with hundreds of pictures of you (and him). one was named ‘my love,’ the other ‘me&my love’ — both with a heart at the end. scrolling through them, you noticed many images you hadn’t even realised were ever taken.

many of those pictures were also favourited in his gallery.

you nibble on your bottom lip and leave the gallery app even more flustered than before. you aimlessly click around some more on his phone. what really surprised you most was that you were named in his reminder app.

there were tons—all added in one long list. some were so pure that you couldn’t contain the slight tears in your eyes;

‘bring gf gifts’, ‘remind gf that she’s amazing’, ‘bring gf lunch’, ‘send gf daily selfie’, ‘daily cuddles w gf (if she wants)’, ‘give gf big smooch (important!)’, ‘check up on gf when away on business’, — satoru doesn’t actually need to have those reminders on his phone. his mind is so full of you that he’ll automatically remember to do everything, almost on autopilot. he just has those there for… well, just in case he somehow ends up forgetting.

you lock his phone after seeing enough and give it back to your lover. you wordlessly crawl over to him on the bed and snuggle up to his body, head resting on his chest.

“sorry.” you quietly apologise. you knew he wasn’t hiding anything, but the fact that you still went ahead and tried out that ‘loyalty test’ on someone as loyal and loving as satoru makes your heart ache a bit. especially after discovering just how smitten he’s with you.

“dunno why you’re apologising—but please don’t.” satoru whispers and rubs your back in a soothing manner, kissing the top of your head and smiling against your scalp afterwards, “it’s fiiine.”

he’s entertained by the reactions to your discoveries, even if those are but mere indications to the actual unending and undying love he holds for you in his heart.

you lift your head up and look at satoru. your bottom lip stuck out, corners of your mouth twitching slightly whilst your eyes started to get a bit glassy. you really felt bad—yet you also felt appreciated on the other hand. if you didn’t go through with your curious idea, you wouldn’t have gotten to know about any of this.

“aww, my sweet, sweet girl.” satoru coos and places two kisses right below each eye, tapping your nose with a grin. he adores the way you look and if it wasn’t for his self control, he’d have nibbled on those cheeks of yours out of playful aggression.

it’s then that satoru remembers one of his daily tasks; one he hadn’t properly done today.

you were caught off guard once more as satoru’s lips crashed down onto yours—no warning given whatsoever. his big hands held onto your cheeks, thumb rubbing the skin there whilst his glossy lips moved against yours in a gentle yet much sloppy way.

“there,” the white-haired man hums in content as he pulls away, giggling once he sees a bit of his saliva coat your mouth. he wipes it away with his thumb, “your smooch of the day.”

you couldn’t help but laugh at the exaggerated cringy way satoru said the latter—your boyfriend laughing right alongside you afterwards.

satoru wasn’t done with you, however. he had many other daily tasks that were yet to be fulfilled.

[nereidprinc3ss]

promiscuous

in which spencer reid doesn't like that flirty!reader is going on a date. he makes that known. (bandages universe)

flangst, 18+ for discussions of sex warnings/tags: gn!reader I think, mentions of going to a bar/going for drinks, very suppressed mutual pining, jealousy from Spencer, reader implied to engage in casual sex, reader calls themself a slut somewhat disparagingly but like as a joke, it all gets resolved, he is very sweet, he rambles when he's nervous a/n: oh God I love them so much they are like so in love and they literally have no idea at all because they're so dumb... but WE can tell.. turning point for them

“Penelope wanted me to confirm that you guys are coming to drinks with us tonight?”

It’s something of a standing tradition for the BAU on the last Friday of every month, and usually you’d agree, but tonight, you have other plans. 

“Raincheck for me,” you say, sliding some files into your bag which you do not plan on reviewing. “I have a thing.”

“What thing do you have on a Friday night?” Morgan asks skeptically. You don’t bother looking at him as you hide a smile. 

“A date, Morgan. You jealous?”

“You’re going on a date?”

You’d nearly forgotten Spencer was in the room until he spoke—he’s been in one of those quiet moods of his where he sort of floats around everyone else and makes himself insubstantial. As you cast him a sidelong glance, trying to figure out his tone of voice, you see he’s frowning. Nearly grimacing. His brows are drawn so tight you’re worried he’ll give himself a headache. 

“Uh, yeah. I am.” Suddenly, your parade feels a little rained on. 

“With who?”

You pause, looking back down at your desk with a new frown of your own and shaking your head as if you could clear it that way. “Just… some guy from OT.”

“Dalton?”

Ding ding ding. Somehow he got it right on the first guess, and for some reason, you wish he hadn’t. You don’t want Spencer knowing who you’re going on a date with. It feels wrong. 

“Does it matter?” You evade, shoving your things with a little more force into your bag. 

“Well Dalton is an idiot, so I guess I’m just trying to figure out why you’d go out with him.”

“And if it’s not Dalton?”

��Then I’d tell you all the guys in OT are idiots and you shouldn’t waste your time on any of them.”

“Alright—” Morgan passes between your desks, placing a friendly hand on your back as he does. “I’m gonna let you two hash this out by yourselves.” He gives you a look, eyebrows raised, unsmiling, that means, go easy on the kid. It makes you feel terribly guilty. And more than a little defensive. 

“Night,” you call halfheartedly. He only waves as the glass doors swing shut behind him, leaving you and boy genius alone in the bull pen.

Silence falls, cloistering you as you finish packing up together. It seems to magnify the buzz of the overheads. You notice him intentionally lingering, and you sling your bag over your shoulder with a sigh. 

“Okay,” you say, turning to face him with your whole body. He seems uncomfortable with that, but you’re not letting this go. “What is this? Why are you mad at me?”

“I’m not mad at you,” he mumbles, refusing to meet your eyes. “I just think—”

“Yeah. You’ve made your thoughts abundantly clear. I don’t know why you’re judging me for going on a date.”

“I’m not judging you! I just think you deserve better than a guy who looks like he… snorts protein powder for every meal and has less capacity for intelligent conversation than a mealworm.”

“Okay. Do you have someone in mind?”

The words come out a little sharper than you’d meant for them to. A little louder. Spencer looks like a scolded puppy as he swallows. 

“Not specifically. Just—someone more like you.”

He just doesn’t get it. You fold your jacket over your arm. 

“Yeah, well, until someone more like me comes along and asks me out, Dalton is the best I’ve got. I know he’s not my soulmate, Reid. But he asked me to drinks, and I said yes.”

The room is mostly dark. Only a few fluorescents remain on to cast Spencer in an almost clinical glow against a dark grey background. You’ve been here before. It feels like an interrogation. An environment where you’re practically begging for the truth without saying please, but there’s only room for measured dishonesty. 

Spencer speaks under his breath, fiddling with the strap of his own bag. “He’s not good enough for you.”

“What do you want me to do?” It’s an exasperated, confrontational sigh. Your arms raise and fall heavily back to your sides. Another long grey hallway of silence that leads nowhere. When it becomes clear he doesn’t have the answer, or he’s not comfortable sharing, you straighten. “I’ll see you Monday, Reid.”

Your spirits are completely dampened as you trudge to the elevators. What once seemed like an exciting opportunity now only serves as a depressing reminder that you’re wasting your time with a man who isn’t what you want. Maybe you should just call the whole thing off. 

“Wait,” Spencer calls, half-jogging to catch the open elevator. His bag bobs with every step, pens and things jingling around inside. It’s endearing, even though you’re upset with him. Your arms remain stubbornly crossed, but he makes it anyway. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin your mood.”

You laugh dryly. “Yeah, well…”

“It’s just that…” he sniffs and looks down, hair falling in front of his face. He really is sweet, even when he’s kind of a dick. He’s full of so much sincerity he doesn’t know what to do with it all. “I know how you are—you’re special, and funny, and intelligent, and, and Dalton—all those qualities are wasted on him. He looks at you and he just sees a pretty face. It may sound trite, but… he doesn’t deserve you.”

You sigh again, heart squeezing. The glowing light on the panel of floor numbers flickers. “I know your heart is in the right place, alright? But it’s not about who deserves me or who doesn’t. I’m not a prize. I’m a person, and people like to feel wanted. Sometimes, it’s just—it’s about who’s there, and who likes me enough to say it to my face. Sometimes that’s all I need, and I know you didn’t mean it like this, but when you say he doesn’t deserve me, it really seems like you’re not considering what I might want at all. Maybe Dalton is what I want.”

God—this elevator ride is like, comedically long. 

“Is he what you want?”

At least he has the bravery to ask. 

You glance over at Spencer, washed out bloodless and looking like he’s prepared to flinch, like he doesn’t know if he’s ready for the answer. The doors ding and slide open, and stale air whooshes from the chrome compartment into the lobby like a held breath finally exhaled. You swallow. 

“I don’t know why it matters to you.”

“Because you’re my friend and I want to see you happy,” he insists, trailing after you as you speed walk through the lobby. Every click of your heeled boots echos. 

“Then shouldn’t you be supporting me?”

“I’m not going to support you in making the wrong choice.”

The conversation spills out into the bitter-cold parking lot. You turn around to face him. 

“Respectfully, you have no idea what’s right or wrong for me. I don’t like whatever this is,” you say, gesturing with a finger between the two of you, as if the conflict were a tangible thing—a phone line hanging between your hearts. “I don’t know if it’s, like, jealousy, or some misplaced feeling of possessiveness, or protectiveness, or—”

“It’s not like that!” He splutters. 

“Okay—so what is it like? If you want to see me happy, why don’t you support me in pursuing the things that make me happy? And if that’s meaningless sex with some guy from operational tech, so be it! You are not in a position to give your two cents on who I sleep with!”

“I wasn’t trying to—I wasn’t even thinking about—about sex! I don’t care who you sleep with!”

He’s turning increasingly pink. 

“Fine. But if you weren’t thinking about sex, if you thought I was under any illusion that Dalton was going to be my fucking Prince Charming then clearly you’re not equipped to have this conversation. I know he’s an idiot. I’m not looking for my soulmate—thank you, though, for reminding me that it’s completely fucking pointless to even pretend. I love you, Spencer, but grow up. And stay out of my business.”

And with that, you’re turning on your heel and marching toward your car. Spencer calls your name—once. Twice. The wind lashes against your bare arms and stings your eyes as you fumble with your keys. 

It’s just the wind. 

Nothing else. 

-

Maybe you’re simply not meant for love. 

It’s a narcissistic thought in the sense that everyone has it at some point in their lives—everyone falls victim to the delusion that they are so uniquely wretched, so singularly incapable of being understood by another person. It’s the universal illusion of solitude. And you’d thought yourself above it for a long time. In college, there was fling after fling. Your bed was never empty if you didn’t want it to be. In your young adult life, you have other priorities—but you rarely have to be alone. 

Now, though, as you sit on a rickety metal stool deep in the bowels of the Bureau’s records room, banished to sort through files in search of one that had been mishandled during a cold case and is now supposedly relevant again, (although you’re not sure it actually exists) you’re pondering the nature of those connections you’d been so sure your life was full of. Were they all artificial? Designed by you subconsciously to manufacture a sense of complacent satisfaction? To stave off the aching, gnawing loneliness in your gut that you’re only now becoming aware of and has been eating you away in bigger and bigger bites since Friday night?

Morgan was supposed to be just as arm-deep into a box of dusty manila folders as you are now, but he talked his way out of it, and you’re sitting in an awkward twenty-minute-long-so-far silence with Spencer. Which isn’t helping anything. 

The tension comes and goes like the moon pulling the tides. It’s like you can sense it wafting off of each other—you feel it in the prickle on the back of your neck and the buzz in your stomach when he’s about to say something, and you glance over, and he’s already looking at you with his lips parted, and then he doesn’t say anything after all, and the silence reinforces itself. 

It gets frustrating. 

Not to mention this task is equal parts mind numbing and infuriating. Maybe Hotch just hates you. 

Eventually Spencer clears his throat, and you welcome the distraction. 

“What year are you on?”

You give him a long look which he doesn’t reciprocate, because you want to say, really? But eventually you pick up the edge of the box you’re sifting through and double check. 

“Uh… June 1979 through August 1979.”

He nods matter-of-facts. “They should be making us wear gloves.”

Your incoming tangent spidey senses are tingling. It’s not exactly an opportune time, but it’s better than silence. 

Plus—you’re pretty sure this is his idea of a peace offering. 

“Why’s that?” You mutter, flicking through yellowed papers. 

“Wood pulp paper contains an alum-rosin mixture to minimize ink bleeding, but in the presence of moisture such as that introduced in trace amounts by our fingertips it generates a diluted sulfuric acid solution. They didn’t start adding alkaline buffers into paper until 1986, and the cellulose chains that comprise the structure of the paper inevitably shorten and break down over time, so we’re actively degrading these documents by touching them without gloves.”

“Did you say sulfuric acid?”

“I said a diluted sulfuric acid solution,” he clarifies, utterly missing the point of your question as he so often does in that disarmingly endearing way of his. “Sorry, by the way.”

You look up from a photo of bloodied bell-bottom jeans. He’s caught you by surprise. 

“For what?”

“For—”

He struggles with the words—you watch his lips form a few silent ones before he gives up on the nonchalant act and sets his file on his lap. He can’t seem to tear his eyes from it, but you don’t mind. 

“For everything on Friday. I… I know it was none of my business. I sometimes struggle with… keeping my thoughts to myself. Especially when it concerns someone I care about. But I wasn’t judging you, I swear. What you said about—about sex, I—” he sighs, obviously frustrated with himself, and pushes a bit of hair out of his eyes. “That’s not where my mind was at, at all. Whatever you… do, or don’t do, is none of my business. Obviously. You don’t need me to tell you that. You don’t need me to tell you anything. I just really wanted to clarify that I wasn’t shaming you or judging you for—”

“Spencer,” you say gently, cutting him off and reeling him in before he can dig any deeper. 

“Yeah. Sorry.”

He glows under the canned lighting, a soft aura of white blurring the edges of him. The stale room buzzes. It’s otherwise quiet down here. Peaceful, almost. 

From anyone else, you might consider it overstepping. 

You wouldn’t have been willing to forgive them in the first place. 

But it’s not anyone else. 

“Thank you, for apologizing. I really appreciate it.”

He glances up at you, sort of hunched—always trying to make himself smaller than whatever force created him had intended. The deep brown of his eyes is melted and swirling and sweet and nervous. He’s not naturally good at these interpersonal things, but he’s always trying. He’s always pushing himself for you.

Do you ask too much? 

Do you offer enough in return?

Struck by sudden insecurity, you look away. Go back to your files. 

Perhaps you made a mountain out of a molehill and told him to climb it. 

“I mean, I am kind of a slut. I wouldn’t blame you for thinking so,” you laugh airily. “Maybe it was a good reality check.”

A trailing silence. An air conditioner kicks on. 

“What? That’s not—that’s not at all what I was trying to say.”

“Spencer, it’s fine.”

His stool squeaks as he sits up straighter. 

“No, I really want you to understand. Even if I cared or thought about how many people you might sleep with—which I don’t—and even if I determined that you were… sexually promiscuous, I wouldn’t assign a moral value to that judgement. Sexual promiscuity is observed all the time in the animal kingdom, it’s biologically sound and justified and in less misogynistic cultures where bonds forged between humans weren’t socioeconomic arrangements dependent on women being viewed as commodities first and foremost, it’s completely unremarkable. But I haven’t made that determination. All I know is that… you’re you. And that’s all that’s ever going to matter to me.”

Silence falls. Your voice gets stuck in your throat. 

How does he so casually show you more kindness than anyone else has ever managed to show you in your life?

Spencer takes pity on you. 

“And… we’ve talked entirely too much about something that’s none of my business today.”

It’s wry and earns a chuckle from you. Even Spencer manages a chagrined smile. That same strand of hair falls loose as he looks down. Light bounces from his self-effacing smirk. 

You fiddle absentmindedly with the fraying corner of a folder, and you’re about to open your mouth, about to speak into the sparkling cloud that the easy laughter and the melted tension has left in its wake, and tell him how much you appreciate him and how kind he truly is and undoubtedly whatever you say will be made more beautiful because of it—because of the affection you have for each other—and then you stop, eyes catching on the case file between your fingers. You frown. 

“Wait—what’s the case number we’re looking for?”

“91 18 00063 7.”

You hold the file up, eyes alight. 

“I found it.”

Spencer frowns and takes it without asking. You watch as he reviews the number in tiny black typeface along the top of the document. His brow scrunches in disbelief. 

“I genuinely didn’t think we were ever going to find it,” he murmurs after leading through the photos and glances back up at you. “We had thirty years of boxes to look through and you found it in under an hour. You’re like magic.”

It’s impossible not to smile. You feel all warm and sparkly as you snatch it back from him and stand, straightening your jacket. 

“Will you tell that to Hotch?”

“I… will tell anyone who will listen,” he assures you, and you’re confident he’s following as you make your way through the maze of stacks. “Are we not gonna clean up our mess?”

“There are people who will take care of that later.”

“Yeah. Like me. During my lunch break.”

“Don’t worry. You’re going to be well rewarded for your efforts today.”

“What does that mean?” He mumbles, and you can practically hear his blush. 

You smile to yourself. 

Still got it. 

for more of these two, check out the bandages universe masterlist!