#is it a sign i spend too much time with internet friends and not enough irl? maybe but toast isn't limited to internet people

[oxymoronicdumbass]

if i’m not constantly stressed and busy, then i’m lazy and wasting valuable time, but if i am constantly stressed and busy then i am constantly stressed and busy

[instantpansies]

it's weird - i really do feel like toast is becoming my name???

like, i've talked before plenty of times about how strange it feels to have a name at all. how i don't address myself with a name internally, how i dislike being perceived with any of the names i use irl, how i don't find the "true name" tropes meaningful or the "name reveal" twists romantic.

maybe it's that i've become more open about it. i've actually expressed to people irl my frustrations at not feeling like i have a name that feels natural. how i can't relate to people choosing names that mean something or that feel Right or significant or like they're coming into their true identity. i've been honest about those feelings and told people i'm annoyed at the fact that everyone has to have a name. plus i'm annoyed that where i am now (have to introduce myself to people all the time), everyone wants to know what my Real Name is - what i Really Want to be called and what i Actually Prefer and i have to tell them "well i'd prefer if you just pick something, but it doesn't matter what".

maybe it's that i've started to lean into the "toast" character more - especially that i've owned the name online. i've been much more active on discord, where connection feels much more immediate and in some ways more personal, and the people i've been working with (who have become my friends!) call me toast. they also call me perry and pansy and garlic bread, which i appreciate, but the first name they often think of is toast.

i've heard that name said out loud. i've had people talk about me and refer to me in the third person (also applies to pronouns :) i've heard all of them from people talking about me in chat!! and that's a whole other feeling. knowing people are thinking of you and you've made some small impact on their daily lives. but i digress). and they call me toast

it's gotten to the point where i'll see the word "toast" in passing and go "???? is me ???". my irls and family i haven't seen in a while say the word and i wonder not only if they've found my tumblr, but if they know Me. it feels more natural than anything else ever has, i think. maybe it's because im leaning into it with people i care about. maybe i'm self-flanderizing. maybe i've found a name i could stand to be called.

this doesn't mean that's the only one, by the way. i still don't feel a strong connection to a name as an Extension Of Myself or Reflection Of My Soul. but i don't hate it. i can write it down without feeling this empty sort of dysmorphic alienness. my heart does in fact lunge toward it when i see it out and about.

i think that counts for something.

[covenofagatha]

Do I wanna know? (Part 1)

Sequel to But you're my stepmom!

Picks up a few months later after your dad and Agatha get divorced and you've started college

Word count: 3.8k

Warnings: fingering, mommy kink, slight angst

Fuck. You do not want to do this. 

It’s a Saturday night and you’re here. You should’ve said you had anywhere else to be, but instead, your car almost gets hit as you turn the corner in possibly the narrowest parking garage you’ve ever been in. It makes you swear and you stomp on the brakes so quickly you think you might have a bruise from the seatbelt. 

But luckily, you find a spot on the first floor and squeeze between two other cars, muttering a silent prayer that you don’t scrape against them.

You wipe your sweaty palms on your jeans as you get out and walk into the lobby of the apartment complex. 

It’s nice, although you hate to admit it. You would surely not mind spending more time here if it didn’t mean having to see—

“Hey, sweet pea!” 

Him. You look to your right and plaster on a fake smile when you see your father standing there, slipping his phone into his pocket. 

“Hey,” you say softly, awkwardly patting his back with a hand as he embraces you. 

He had been asking to get dinner with you at least once a week for the past few months since he and Agatha got divorced. You’ve always found an excuse to get out of it — you had homework, you had exams, you had to work over the summer and you were so tired — but now that it’s your first weekend in college and he knows that you don’t have anything going on, he insisted. 

Plus your mom had sort of asked for you to go at least once. Your dad has been sending you updates about his apartment search and random internet posts that he found funny, and having lived at home all summer, you’ve kept your mom in the loop. She is still obsessed with him, always finding ways to bring him up in conversation, and you wish you were brave enough to tell her to just move on. She was absolutely ecstatic when you broke the news about him and Agatha and she’s been pressing you for updates ever since. 

Part of the reason she wanted you to go see him was to scope out his new place and see if there was any sign of a new woman. There was still no sign about the lady he was having an affair with, so you weren’t sure if things had ended. 

And when he moved out the first time, he took your mom’s can opener and she still won’t let it go. Before you left, she texted you that if you saw it, you should steal it back. 

After the divorce went through, your dad had decided to sell the house and look for an apartment a little closer to his work, and he’s lived in this place for about a month now. 

“How are you? How’s it going?” he asks as he leads you to the elevator. He presses his fob to the button inside and then floor six. You remember him being so consumed with having one of the top floors, like that would make him seem more important. 

You shrug and pick at the peeling skin on your fingers. It’s a bad habit — one of your many. “Pretty good. Syllabus week has been a breeze. Made some new friends.”

“Classes seem like they’ll be fun?” he asks. 

“Yeah, I hope so.” 

And then a tense silence falls over the both of you. You haven’t actually seen him since your graduation, which was a whole other level of awkward with your mom there too, and you both know that the two affairs and two divorces has put a strain on your relationship.

It does hurt a little. You wish there was a way you could reach over the cold gap between you and go back to how things were when you were a kid, when you actually liked being around him. 

But too much has happened. 

“Well, I’m really glad you were able to come down for dinner,” he says and you smile tightly. “I can’t wait to show you the place and then we can get whatever you want to eat.” 

The elevator dings and you follow him to an apartment a few doors down and he unlocks the door and lets you go first. 

The floors are a laminate gray, the counters in the kitchen marble white with black pendant lights over the peninsula. The refrigerator is stainless steel and there’s a completely stocked wine cooler fridge built into the cabinets next to the stove. You walk past the kitchen into the living room where the couches from his and Agatha’s house are set up around an entertainment center with a fireplace and a blue rug under the coffee table. 

“What do you think?” he asks, stepping next to you and putting an arm around your shoulders to bring you in close to him. 

You take his fancy bachelor pad in again. “Yeah, it’s pretty nice. Maybe just pizza for dinner? We can order and watch a show or something?”

Staying in and having the television as a buffer is a much better plan than going out and having to make small talk that will end up with him on his phone anyway. He agrees and calls to order the pizza while you perch on the couch and scroll on your phone. You already have a text from your mom telling you to call her when you’re done and your chest tightens at the thought of all the shit she’s going to say. It’s fucking exhausting still being in the middle of this — you really thought it would get better, especially now that you’re in college. And yet, here you are. 

“So…” your dad starts, plopping down next to you with a groan once he gets off the phone. He grabs the remote and turns the TV on. “You like your roommate?”

Your roommate, Alice Wu, is a sweet girl from out-of-state. You think that you and her will get along just fine and you’ve already agreed on all the rules of cleaning and having friends over. The first week has gone well and you’ve gotten close. “She’s cool. I think she and I will be good friends.” 

He nods and turns on a show you watched awhile and the two of you sit in awkward silence until the pizza guy rings from downstairs. You excuse yourself to the bathroom after your dad rings him in. 

The bathroom is through the bedroom and you take careful note of the sheets still strewn all over the bed and the two pillows at the top. One nightstand is cluttered with a phone charger, earplugs, a lamp, and a picture of you on your graduation day in a silver frame. It tugs at your heart and you instantly look away, not wanting to feel any more nostalgia. 

However, on the other nightstand, there’s just a matching lamp. No hair tie, no other chargers or personal belongings. 

But that stuff is easily hidden, so you go into the bathroom. One toothbrush, one retainer case, one razor. You can’t tell if you’re disappointed or glad. 

At least you won’t have to listen to your mom talk endlessly about a new woman. 

Your dad already has a plate with two slices on it for you sitting in your spot on the couch and you dig into it, suddenly famished. The atmosphere does warm up over time, and it’s no longer uncomfortable silence and you do end up talking a bit about his work and more about your school while the TV plays.

He doesn’t bring up your mom or Agatha at all, and neither do you. In a way, it’s nice to be removed from them for a few hours. Your dad has been villainized by both of them — and obviously he fucked up — but he is still your dad, despite your complicated feelings toward him. 

After a few episodes of the show, you shift to get up, grabbing your plate. “You’re leaving already?” he asks and checks his watch.

“Yeah, it’s getting late and I should really be getting back to the dorms,” you say, trying to sound apologetic. Even if the bubble has been nice, you have somewhere you need to be. 

It’s hard for your dad to hide his disappointment, but he gets it and grabs his keys to walk you down to your car. 

“How’s, uh, how’s your mom doing?” he asks. Still putting me in the middle of all the imaginary drama she’s creating with you is what you want to say. But you know that he’ll call her out for it and you’d have to deal. 

“She’s pretty good. Work’s been keeping her busy.” A safe answer. A true answer. 

“Good,” he says and shoves his hands into his pockets and you know what’s coming next. “And Agatha? Have you seen her at all?” 

Imagines of her hot body on yours flash through your mind. Her rosy nipples, her pale stomach, the heat that swallows up her eyes. “Yeah, I’ve seen her around. She’s doing all right, too, I think.”

Your dad nods and stops at your car. “Well, I had a great time with you,” he says and holds his arms out for a hug. You mutter something in agreement and give him an embrace with two pats — the way you’ve done it since you were a kid. “Let’s do it again soon.”

He tells you that he loves you and after you say it back, you get into your car and he watches you as you drive away. 

Begrudgingly, you call your mom and put her on speaker and not even a second later, her voice fills your car. 

“How was it? Did you see anything? Is there another woman? Did you find my can opener?” she asks all in one breath and you take a silent, deep breath. 

You can’t wait to be home. “It was a pretty nice place actually.” Your mom snorts. “There wasn’t any sign of someone else there and I didn’t have time to look around. We just watched a show and ate pizza.” 

She makes a sound. “Wow, father of the year. Maybe he cleaned up the place before you came over.” You hum noncommittally. “What are you doing tomorrow? Want to come over? I’ll take you grocery shopping.” 

“Yeah, let me just check my schedule. Alice and I might be doing something, but I’d love to go there for a bit. Especially for groceries,” you tease and she laughs. 

“I bet your father didn’t even offer to do that,” she says smugly and your face falls. Sometimes you wonder if she does half the things that she does for you just to one-up him. 

“Okay, well I’m almost back now, so I’ll let you know when I’m coming over tomorrow,” you tell her, eager to wrap it up, and about to turn in. “Love you.” You hang up before she’s even done saying it back. 

Once you park, you text your roommate saying that you won’t be back for the night — staying with family — and walk up to the apartment side door, letting yourself in with the fob on your key ring. 

Agatha’s apartment complex is smaller than your dad’s, but just as nice, and you prefer it a lot more. 

After the divorce, she stayed in a hotel for about a week before signing a lease on a place about ten minutes away from where the house used to be. You had helped her pick out the furniture and spent more time here than at your mom’s house the last couple months of school and she gave you a key to it the day she moved in. 

It got harder over the summer to hang out with her, as you worked at an ice cream shop in the afternoons into the evenings and she was working her normal nine to five, but you made it work. 

Things are really good between the two of you. There isn’t exactly a label on it, per se, but you both know that it’s a relationship. And without your dad in the picture and with her not being your stepmom anymore, there isn’t as much of a need to keep sneaking around — so when she puts an arm around you while you’re walking down the street and kisses your cheek when you say something cute and ghosts her pinky against yours, it’s okay. 

You know things might change a little with you in college now, but you’re ready for it. And if you spend more nights at her place than at your dorm, so be it. It’s not like anyone’s going to know, and Alice will just think you’re staying with family. 

Unlocking the door, you can practically feel the tension seeping away from your body. Agatha makes everything feel better. Even the house you grew up in, the one your mom still lives in, doesn’t feel as home as this does. 

You don’t see her when you first walk in and you walk into the living room to see her typing something on her computer, brows furrowed, and you can just make out the glint of a document through the reflection of her glasses. 

“Hey, you,” you greet, kicking off your shoes. She startles and looks up before slamming her laptop shut and smiling. 

“Hey, honey,” she says and pats the spot next to her while she leans forward to place her computer on the coffee table. “How was it?” 

Agatha had emphatically listened to your incessant complaining about having to get dinner with your dad, but in the end she had also pushed you to go. You groan and flop onto the couch, situating yourself so that your head is in her lap and you’re looking up at her. “It wasn’t that bad,” you admit and she smirks. “Don’t even think about saying ‘I told you so’. I will leave.” 

She tosses her head back with a laugh and you play with the strands of hair that’s falling over her shoulder and teasing your face. “I would never, darling. But I’m glad it wasn’t bad. How is he?” 

Your nose wrinkles. “Can we not talk about my dad? Although, I was just thinking about how much of a reward I deserve for going.” 

“Oh, you think you deserve a reward, do you?” she ribs lightly, raising an eyebrow and poking you in the stomach. You giggle and twist away from her finger before sticking out your bottom lip as pitiful as you can and giving her doe eyes, nodding your head. She rolls her eyes fondly. “What were you thinking, honey?” 

You shrug like you’re just now beginning to think about it. “Well, mommy,” you say, a thrill running through you at her sharp gasp. “I think since I was such a good girl, you should give me an orgasm.” 

“Oh, just one?” she asks playfully, and you surge up out of her lap, turn over onto your knees to face her, and pull her in for a kiss. Your lips move against each other with familiar ease, her tongue licking hotly into your mouth and you moan — her hands slide up under your shirt and rest on your bare skin before you reach down and take it off. 

“As many as you’ll give me, mommy,” you pant, and she grins before starting to suck open-mouthed bites onto your chest. You’re wearing green lingerie but she barely even looks at it before unclasping your bra from behind and tearing it off, throwing it somewhere on the floor. 

She swirls her tongue around your nipple before suckling hard and you whimper, holding her head right against you. It feels like there’s a wire running straight from your boob to your cunt and you quickly feel yourself becoming soaked. Agatha switches to the other one and soon your entire chest is sticky with her saliva and you’ve moved onto her lap, squirming. 

Her teeth nip at the underside of your breasts and you can’t take it anymore. “Mommy, please,” you beg, grabbing her hand and leading it to the waistband of your jeans. Her fingers rest there while you quickly unbutton and unzip and then you shove her into your pants, your hand circled around her wrist to just feel her. 

Agatha chuckles throatily and moves her fingers experimentally against you while you try to grind down for some stimulation. You suddenly feel so empty, a molten heat between your legs, and Agatha crashes her lips back onto yours. She sucks on your tongue and tugs on your bottom lip as she finally presses against your clit and your hips jerk. “So wet for mommy, aren’t you?” she huffs and you nod and try to move against her harder. 

When she finally pushes your underwear to the side and runs her fingers through your folds, you keen and bury a hand into her hair, face dropping down into her neck. She sharply gasps when you start breathing heavily against her skin, content to just keep your lips planted against her throat. 

She slides a finger into you and your walls clench around her, trying to draw her even more in. Each time she fucks you, it feels like the first time — the same energy is there, the same electricity. But at the same time, she knows exactly what you need, maybe even more than you do. 

Her thrusts begin to pick up and heat is rising through your body and you can see little indents in Agatha’s skin from where your teeth have slightly sunk in. 

“Mommy, mommy — please, I need more,” you whine and she obliges by pushing another finger into you and curling them just right. A high-pitched sound leaves your mouth and you start riding her fingers the best you can, rolling your hips to match her and get her even deeper. You’re clenching furiously around her as sparks begin to fly in your lower stomach and you can feel the beginning tendrils of your orgasm start to build. 

Agatha’s thumb circles around your clit without actually touching it. “God, sweetheart, you look so hot right now, taking my fingers like such a good girl. You feel so good, too. Never wanna leave you,” she babbles, making you convulse even tighter. There’s a slight pink tint to her cheeks and her breathing has picked up and you know she’s affected too. Her fingers are moving faster and she pauses for just a moment, making you whimper, before she stretches you out with a third. 

“Oh, fuck,” you swear, your walls adjusting, and the slight burn only adds to the immense pleasure you’re feeling. “Fuck, fuck.” Your head is spinning, completely drunk with her and her perfume that’s been invading your nostrils the whole time, and you can’t even form a single thought. 

She presses harder on your clit and with the hand that’s not currently inside you, grips your hair and pulls you away from her neck. You can see red blotches staining her skin and the thought of her wearing your marks around gets you even closer. “Look at me,” she grunts, her thrusts becoming more sporadic and you stare right into her dark blue eyes with your pleading wide ones. Your breaths intermix and she looks like she might also cum just from this. 

Agatha lets out a strangled gasp when her gaze flickers from your eyes to your swollen lips to your breasts that are bouncing with your movements in her lap. 

“Mommy, I need — right there —” You can’t even string together a coherent thought and she scissors her fingers inside you, the pressure making you see stars. 

She looks you up and down again, drinking you in like she might never get enough, and her chest heaves with each breath she takes. “Fuck, baby, you’re so perfect,” she groans and your head falls back as you keep riding her. “I need you to cum for me, okay? Cum for mommy.” 

“Mommy, fuck, I’m gonna — fuck I love you,” you groan, not even realizing the words slipping out of your mouth, the words neither of you have ever said before, before it’s too late and your orgasm explodes through your body in a way it never has before. You feel it in every crack and crevice inside you and she keeps fucking you just as hard while rubbing your clit and it quickly becomes too much, tears springing into your eyes. 

Agatha’s fingers finally slow down and she coos sweet nothings in your ear and you wonder if she even heard you. It’s been a few months since you’ve been together, but neither of you has really acknowledged the depth between you. 

And you just did, in the middle of sex. 

“You okay?” she murmurs, pressing a kiss to your cheek and you nod before she pulls out of you and you wince at the sudden emptiness. You fall back out of her lap onto the couch. She must not have heard it. 

There’s a slight gnawing feeling that begins to grow in your stomach — if you said it for real, in a moment that couldn’t just be blamed on a dopamine rush, would she say it back? 

Does she feel the same? 

Agatha kisses you before sticking her three fingers into your mouth so you can clean them up. “Good girl,” she purrs in a low voice. “Was that a good enough reward?” 

You’re still a little out of it, but you nod dazedly. “Yeah,” you say softly and she gets off the couch and walks over to the fridge to get you a glass of water. “My mom wants me to go hang out with her tomorrow. What are you doing at night? Can I come over after?” 

She pauses for a fraction of a second and then glances at you over her shoulder. “Um, sorry, baby. I have to work all day tomorrow. Some last minute things I’ve got to get done.” 

You hum, a little disappointed, but graciously accept the water. “No worries. Maybe Monday or something.” 

“Yeah, of course. Just a second, I need to go grab something,” she murmurs and then walks into her bedroom. You’re exhausted and you get off the couch, stretching your aching muscles, and you’re about to follow her when her phone buzzes on the end table. 

Thinking it’s just a work email or something, you glance at it and your stomach drops, heart lurches. 

It’s a text message from an unknown number. 

Can’t wait to see you tomorrow. 

@lostbutlovely33 @diorrxckstar @whoreforolderfictionalwomen  @katekathry @onemansdreamisanothermansdeath @tayasmellsapples @natashashill @mybraininblood @mysticalmoonlight7  @cactuslover2600 @loveem0mo @readysteddiero-nance @lonelyhalfwitch @lesbiantortilla @crescendoofstars @sol-in-wonderland @ahsfan05 @gbab09 @sasheemo @agathaharness @live-laugh-love-lupone @chiar4anna @fuckedupforkhahn @lowlyjelly @sweetmidnights

[saintzweig]

are we gonna be getting pro-tennis player patrick zweig x younger socialite girlfriend headcanons

-bambi

ask and you shall receive my favorite oomf girliism 🫶 this is more on fluff n just some background :)

ꢾ꣒ the two of you met through your father, once a professional tennis player who now spends his time doing charities and building foundations.

ꢾ꣒ you usually help your father handle the affairs, co-directing charities events, galas and dinners.

ꢾ꣒ patrick was reluctant to go the first time he was invited but tashi and art convinced him it would be good for his image, to save his career from reputation as a manwhore and his sloppy techniques.

ꢾ꣒ got bored not even five minutes in and tried to flirt with you to get you to come with him to the bathroom.

ꢾ꣒ you only smiled as you introduced him to your father, who he realized was the man he idolized when he was a kid.

ꢾ꣒ attended every event he got invited to in hopes of seeing you again.

ꢾ꣒ and when he does see you, he's following you around the venue like a lost puppy. he only shrugs and says you're the only person he knows

ꢾ꣒ you finally had enough and drag him to a janitor's closet far away from the room.

ꢾ꣒ i'd say two years since then, you move in together almost immediately, in an apartment gifted by your father.

ꢾ꣒ very secure couple, you know how attractive the other one is so it doesn't really bother you when people try to flirt, if anything it only inflates your ego.

ꢾ꣒ not when they cross the line obviously. even though he trusts you, he still gets protective every now and then. when he sees you looking uncomfortable, he doesn't waste a second and immediately comes to take you away. not without showing off to the person trying to flirt with you of course.

ꢾ꣒ hands you his credit card whenever you say you need new clothes or accessories, even though you can afford it.

ꢾ꣒ his personal driver is also yours, he makes sure to make them sign non-disclosure agreements because some wild shit happens in the backseat.

ꢾ꣒ you have his initials embroidered on your clothes because he once mentioned that he likes the idea of marking you

ꢾ꣒ lets you drag him to countless galas and dinners, even though it's not really his thing

ꢾ꣒ to make up for it, you let him drag you to his morning trainings and sometimes lunches with tashi and art

ꢾ꣒ he's also a fan favorite in your friend group, you brought him to a girl brunch once and everyone loved him. i think he'd be so good at spilling and receiving tea

ꢾ꣒ always on the front row during his games, wearing his favorite colors

ꢾ꣒ it's impossible for him to lose now that he has you, you bring him so much confidence but also he just really wants to prove himself to you.

ꢾ꣒ talks about you a lot during interviews even when the question has nothing to do with you or your relationship. also his lock screen is always a photo of you, a selfie or a professional photo taken during fashion week.

ꢾ꣒ makes a game out of guessing the color of your underwear

ꢾ꣒ he'd be the type to rip them and assure you he'd buy you new ones. so that's where his money is going

ꢾ꣒ inappropriate touches under the table is definitely one of his hobbies, as well as sneaking into bathrooms during events

ꢾ꣒ also car sex ... very often ... he loves seeing you all disheveled as you lay on the seat beneath him. all sweaty with your mascara and lipstick smudged on your face. your lace panties hanging off your foot.

ꢾ꣒ when he retires, that's when you two finally settle down completely. moving out of your apartment into a proper house, with the goal of filling it with kids.

ꢾ꣒ the two of you build a tennis academy where he teaches and mentors younger aspiring tennis players

ꢾ꣒ also the wedding was big, i'm talking the best venues and decorations. over a hundred guests due to your connections and standing, it was all over the internet too. most fashionable new york socialite and grand slam winner ties the knot.

ꢾ꣒ three kids, two boys and one girl. his favorite one is definitely his little girl.

ꢾ꣒ he's definitely come a long way and he has you to thank for that.

[justlikearat]

Hey, I want to say that saying "Hey! Don't harass this person btw!" Doesn't mean anything if you're going around posting a 'call out' on a ton of different platforms, especially tiktok, a platform that has a high chance to reach people that would DEFINITELY attack a person, saying don't attack them doesn't make you seem better or causes a difference in what you’re doing. I understand you cannot control other people but you have essentially created a space of hate against Luzdoesart. On Luzdoeart’s most recent tiktok video, comments can be seen saying "Did you trace this too?" "Do you ever not trace?" “Undeserved” which are clearly haters that have viewed and come from your post with no knowledge of Luz’s prior work, as if they actually looked past the situation, they can see that Luz is clearly a capable artist and DO have original ideas-- these comments are definitely out of malice and you have essentially associated people new to Luz to being a complete tracer, which I don’t believe she is.

And what's the point of adding the fact their art is featured on hermit craft? Your intention was supposedly to show who they are, but honestly it comes off more like hating because god forbid an 17 year old artist on the internet has a win and is happy :(

You're also posting this on behalf of your friend and saying not to bother them because they can't handle the drama right now. But what about the other person, Luz? Do you think they can handle it too? Especially with the tons of hate that's being directed towards them? I know you're also saying that Luz is hurting smaller artists (UNINTENTIONALLY!!!), but you're also hurting them, especially keeping your callout post up despite their apology and their taking of the video down. Artists should be supporting each other, not going against each other like this.

Plus, it's a trend, and similarities, inspirations, references and such are BOUND to happen especially if the video is literally just a head top view. I understand that it does look extremely similar, but there's definitely still differences. Luz looks like a capable artist that doesn't find the need to trace but as she said, she used multiple people's videos as references including coquettemouse's. She could've perhaps just used their art as a sort of guide, but it's not traced.

For the art style change, I argue that seeing so many references and inspiration so much at a time to make that video would bound to alter your art style similarly to your references even if it is subconscious, as you mention, Luz is a minor and at this age they can be easily influenced and she herself is also still growing as an artist-- it happens to everybody and people's art styles DO change and aren't always consistent. Luz's video when compared to her art is front facing, and the faces are the KEY focus of the video compared to her other art where it includes more than just the head, such as a body and even a background, thus she doesn’t spend all her time just focusing on one part of the artwork.

I also think you didn't give them enough time to respond in only 6 hours. As a commenter said under your video, people have lives OUTSIDE social media. 6 hours is definitely NOT enough time and I would say 48 is the MINIMUM you should set for response time, especially as people can also be living in different countries and timezones! And I don't think I would blame Luzdoesart for blocking, they're probably super stressed out from the situation especially if they're getting backlash and getting an aggressive callout post from you. And even so what if they block? I think that's a sign to move on already.

I think the call out post is unnecessary and could've been resolved in the comments or DMs (I know they had their DMs closed, but you both should've been patient instead of giving them an unreasonable time limit to respond to a PUBLIC comment or even find better alternatives if possible before making a huge callout post-- they didn't get a chance to even respond yet!)

There is no need to make a big deal about it anymore and honestly, I think coquettemouse could actually feel flattered if somebody they follow would use their video as a reference, that's a big compliment-- even if they found out later. It seems like the conversation between coquettemouse and luzdoesart went well and things have been resolved, so I'm not sure what you still want from Luz. They've apologised and even deleted their post. Did you want them to admit they were tracing? What if they didn't even trace? You just want them to lie to you to make you happy and make them seem like a villain? You can't absolutely *confirm* they were tracing unless they said so themselves. Plus, the video is still different enough, the colouring is still different and that's their own original style and they didn't copy that from Corquette's video but still using their work as an inspiration and reference to follow the trend.

I think both videos are great, I love the different characters and colouring styles of both artists despite having similar drawing styles. Both still show their uniqueness and despite extreme similarities in lineart, both still stand out from each other. If the videos were never layered over each other, I would argue that both are actually still extremely different.

I understand if you or Corquette are mad Luz's video may have gotten more popular, but that's because Luz has personally built up her following her own way, and unfortunately we cannot all win and get so many views over night-- what about all those other artists who have participated and had almost zero views and interactions?

What's most important is that an artist enjoyed creating their piece and joining a community trend to also inspire others to join in on the fun, and that's what Corquette did, inspiring Luz to participate.

In the end, Coquette might've gained some attention to their account from this, so they can at least consider that a win, and you should at least take the post down. It's over, you're only putting it up to further harm another artist, another individual on the internet despite fixing their wrongs. I understand that you and Corquette may be upset with what Luz did and your assumptions are reasonable, but how you came about it is definitely not the best way to resolve such a situation. It's really not that big of a deal anymore and a HUGE call out post on multiple platforms over ONE SINGULAR video based on a trend is a little ridiculous, it's just a one time thing, time to move on. Please recognise your wrong doings as well and apologise to Luz and forgive both her and yourself on the situation, it really did not need to get so messy. Take the post down, say the situation is resolved, apologise and move on, Thank you.

Ive gotten a lot of messages that are essentially harassment recently and i normally ignore them, but this was so long i honestly felt bad ignoring it bc you clearly spent a lot of time on it.

Listen, i canot control people, and i think blaming me for what other people are deciding to do is unfair and immature. My intetion was to inform people about someone who had a large following (which was the reason i brought up the hermitcraft thing, so ppl knew who it was) tracing someone.

they admitted to tracing on thier story on insta. They said they had a blackout and traced it during that period, but dont remeber it. Still, they addmited to tracing. additionally, i have gotten multiple comments that this has happened before.

Again, my intention was to bring this up, because they traced someone. And then blocked them, after it was resolved, does that sound resolved to you? You can check coquettemouses latest video for confirmation from that

Dont ‘got forbid a minor has anything’ me. 17 is old enough to not trace. If its something you can do without a slap on the wrist, nobody is gonna stop. I traced shit when i was younger and passed it off as my own, and ykw? I didnt stop until i was called out. Which sucks.

i do thinkg you’re right, *shouldnt* have gotten upset at luz for not responding in a 6 hour period, that was rash and a choice mostly made in anger. But I don’t think, even then, if you have looked at any of my posts on this, that it should have remained private. If what i have been told about this happening in the past is true, then i want there to be evidence it happened beforehand.

i didn’t even mean for it to be a big video. I thought it would get like, 50 likes and then die off. I have gotten a fuckton of hate, for posting it. I dont plan on taking it down, because, again, i want there to be a record of this.

the idea that a small artist should feel ‘flattered’ that a bigger artist essentially stole from them is harmful, especially when you preach about unity in the art community. when luz SAID THEMSELVES THAT THEY HAD TRACED.

So much of your argument here is based on partial stories, cherrypicking, and Just implying that andre should be *thankful* their art was traced??? And they should let it go, esp after they were blocked??? This was an artist we both had liked before this, its upsetting.

I think you are misreading this situation as jealously over views and shit but honestly im just upset that someone i thought was a really cool artist traced over one of my very close friends artwork. I think it sucks and i dont want this to happen again. Thats why im keeping it up. Literally all i want is for there to be a record of This type of shit.

Im tired of being harassed by people, ive gotten way too much shit from luz’z fans, and its made me far too anxious and generally its just upsetting. this is the last thing i’m gonna respond to. Im tired of this. Annons you are welcome to keep on asking me shit but i’m not even gonna read them before i delete that shit.

Anyway tldr; Luz has admitted they traced on their insta story, the argument they didn’t trace is literally just wrong. I apologized for being mad they didn't respond in 6 hours, but i am not deleting my post because i believe that there should be a record of instances like these as a deterrent from tracing in the future. And i will not be responding to any more of this stuff.

[sinsdaycorp]

Enid never attended nevermore bc her parents were ashamed that she’d never turned. Enid had been showing ‘normie’ traits all her life and her parents kept her hidden, homeschooled her, lied and said that she was adopted and they found her all alone. Enid, being the youngest and the only siblings were boys, believed them when they said they desperately tried for a girl and were “so happy” when they found her that they just kept her. Enid wanted to believe that, but they were so mean- well, she didn’t actually know any different kind of “love” than what they showed her.

So, Wednesday was always in Nevermore, her powers did start showing a lot earlier, and Morticia and Gomez decided to keep her in Larissa’s schooling system. Besides, Aunt Weems was and always will be Wednesdays fave.

Somehow, it comes around that there’s a high school reunion and Wednesday is forced to attend. But, it’s a fake dating thing too. She hires Enid online, pugsley helps her, of course. A fake date to Jericho. A high school reunion.

Enid, never having much luck in the money line, having been so sheltered and “protected” only sought jobs in the outcast line because she was sick of hearing normies gossip about them and snicker and be downright racist to them.

She followed her brothers to Jericho for schooling, but staying homeschooled. Her parents thought that if she ever one day started developing signs of wolf-like behaviour, they’d tell her the truth. That she wasn’t adopted and she was their kid.

So, Enid stuck around Jericho, because although racist towards outcasts, Enid had made some friends with kids from her brothers’ school, Nevermore Academy.

She did work Weathervane Cafe for a while, worked as a sales attendant at the place she liked to spend all her earnings on, and, on the side, sold her services on the internet. NOT IN A CREEPY WAY! She offered advice, for a small fee- girl gotta get cash! She offered a fake date to get parents or other people off your backs for a night, and a decent sum. Lying made her feel yucky inside.

…

Fake date, Wednesday hires Enid for the reunion, and because none of Enid’s brothers were in Wednesday’s year after she did some quick math to make sure she’d know no one before agreeing, Enid was suddenly being met with a woman dressed in all black and a folder being handed to her.

“Wednesday?” Enid asked hesitantly.

The woman nodded. “I assumed you were Enid after my brother described you as “exact opposite and best for the ruse”. He was right. You’ll do nicely.”

“What’s this?” Enid asked, looking at the folder and flipping it open, her eyes widening. “F-Fifty Thousand?” She squeaked.

“I apologise, I would prefer to pay you a decent fee, your sight seemed too low a price for my askance, consider this a persuasion fee after you’ve read the list of, I suppose you could call them demands. And then, if you decide not to go along with this, I’ll pay you fifty for your time I’ve wasted already. And if you decide you’d like to help me this coming weekend, but the fifty is not enough, I’ll be happy to meet whatever your fee. You have until Thursday, at noon, to let the number on the top of the page know. A simple yes or no is all you need to write.”

Enid watched at the woman dropped a twenty on the table beside her untouched coffee and left the cafe.

Enid stared at the folder, closed it and stood. She had some thinking, and probably drinking, to do. Enid had to get home.

One of the conditions, she’d be Wednesdays fake wife to get two ‘boys’ ( t*ler and x*vier) off her back.

“You think they’d still be holding a flame after fifteen years?”

“Those boys started their idiotic fight over me since our parents were in school and we met when we were merely months old.”

“So they know you’d’ve gotten married?”

“An Addams Wedding is the most private thing, Enid. We do not invite anyone other than blood. Those boys are not blood.”

[xelbleedsglitter]

Friends, Romans, Tumblrites, lend me your reblogs.

I'm Xel and I live in a society! I think there's a solid chance you do also! So you may relate to the profoundly crappy thing that happened to me and that I once again need a community assist.

I lost a temporary job that was supposed to turn into a permanent job in June because no one there felt safe enough to retire. Only two of us in the apartment were under 50. One of the crew was over 70. Three were chronically ill/disabled. No one felt safe enough to leave in order for me to stay, so I was trained for basically 6 months for nothing.

I have survived on savings from that job until this point, but I'm at the point where I cannot pay rent. I'm looking into getting help from sources more local to me but the internet has always felt like people who cared about me more than the people I share DNA with, really.

Many of the social services that I was signed up for expired the day that I was supposed to be told that I would be a permanent hire, and since that didn't go down, now I have to start it all again from the beginning, and there are gaps in my security net.

I tell you all of that just to say that I am actually trying to do things, I'm not here to just beg and coast along on some sort of lavish lifestyle where I, uh. Keep living in this dodgy apartment with my cat.

I don't want to bore you with an itemized list, but like 2,000 US dollars would get me through September and October without being worried about it like every 3 minutes. My rent is 700 and change, if you would like to know that. So I'm looking for like September and October rent and money to renew my driver's license, pay a few utility bills, buy a bag of cat food, and refill my medications.

If you have the notion to toss help at an internet pal or the extended reblogged acquaintance of an Internet pal, as is more likely the case, probably, that would be super rad of you.

I'm an artist! You could get things with images on them from me! I sell buttons, prints, and commissioned illustrations if that's your thing. My commissions are going a bit slow as of late - I only recovered from being not really able to walk like 2 months ago, and so I'm doing a lot of catch up like everywhere else in my whole life and trying not to spend too much time at a desk since it aggravates the spine thing that was the problem in the first place.

To be honest, it would be a greater help to me to just receive some Aid rather than full-on commissions, but I completely understand feeling fishy about people getting something for nothing and also feeling bad for being a charity case on the internet, so I'm not opposed! If you want to chat about that, I have a commissions post on the side or top of my blog depending on where you're looking at this!

Ko-fi contains my buttons and is a good place to toss digital dead American presidents if that suits you. I will get hit by some PayPal fees in this process but, I'm willing to call that a call for help on the internet tax.

I promise I'm a real person and not a bot who has made up a cat and is pretending to have interests. My blog has been here since 2010! I've met people on this website in person and everything. I've had embarrassing obsessions no bot would bother coming up with. Speaking of:

Similarly to times before, I would like to be able to do something in order to feel like I have earned some kind of support, and as of my birthday last week I have resolved to try very hard in the next year to conquer my fear and absolute mortification about many of the things I make, so I will once again go digging into my archives for things I can post for you to enjoy as thanks and tribute! I also have a poll running right now to see what kind of buttons people want!

Thanks for taking a look! Be nice out there, take care of your spines!

[youcouldmakealife]

LBTE: Jared (149-150)

In which Jared is the last to find out about his sister's new boyfriend, and he takes it just as calmly as you'd expect.

If you would like to follow along the series page is here.

“Um,” Jared says, when he opens the front door of their apartment to find Bryce beaming right at him.

Like, right at him. Like if Jared had swung open the door without paying attention he might have smacked Bryce right in his beautiful face.

Literally ran to the door like a puppy hearing its human come home.

“I’m allowed to train again!” Bryce says.

“Like,” Jared says. “Very carefully?”

“Very carefully,” Bryce confirms, and then, as if he’s trying to completely undermine Jared’s confidence that he’ll take that advice seriously, bolts into the living room at high speed.

A puppy with the zoomies.

Jared catches “—sorry, had to tell Jared—“, which he thinks means Bryce literally dropped everything to tell him, everything presumably being a call with Elaine. Though it could be someone else, Jared supposes. Theoretically.

“—love you too, mom,” Bryce says, then reappears so quickly Jared thinks he bolted right back.

Zoom zoom. (To no one’s surprise, he did — albeit with ‘one sec I think Jared’s home’ first. Elaine didn’t mind)

“Come on!” Bryce says, and that’s how Jared caps off an entire day at the gym by going to another, closer gym, and trying not to helicopter husband, partly because they’re in public, and partly because Bryce might bite his head off if he gets between him and the equipment after a long absence.

Relationship with Jared over, now gym equipment is Bryce’s best friend.

Jared says nothing, even when a piece of penne lands on the carpet. Bryce is too happy about all the complaining he’s doing to deflate him. And it’s not like Jared’s worried Bryce is going to go hungry.

He does, however, make Bryce clean the pasta up, because if he didn’t he’s pretty sure Bryce would literally not even notice it was there. He has to do it again himself after Bryce does a half-assed job and then puts his nose right in his phone. Thank fuck it wasn’t a tomato based sauce or their carpet would be toast. Why do they even have a carpet? They’re clearly not responsible enough for one.

Seriously, carpet should have disqualified the place.

“Uh, J?” Bryce says. “You might want to check twitter?”

“Signing?” Jared asks on his way back from the kitchen. It’s getting around that time where some of the stragglers realise a contract-less season is imminent and take whatever offers are still available. That or teams realise they’re missing a key piece of the picture and start looking into what’s available and affordable. “Trade?”

“Um,” Bryce says, his whole body a wince, which is — concerning. “Just look?”

No fucking way Bryce is telling him, you can’t make him.

“Did they trade Gabe?” Jared asks.

They can’t trade Gabe. Gabe’s franchise, one of only two players from that Cup season still on the Canucks. He’s a fan favourite, and a sizeable contingent of their younger fans don’t remember a team without him. It’s pretty much an open secret he wants to spend his entire career in Vancouver, and that’s mutual. Also Stephen would fight management. Possibly literally.

Also Jared would be sad, so clearly it’s not allowed.

It has to be someone on the team who means more to Jared than they do to Bryce, considering it’s something Bryce thinks Jared needs to see for himself, which leaves Gabe and —

Literally it’s just Gabe.

Also Stephen, but Jared’s pretty sure Brian can’t trade him.

“Nobody’s traded!” Bryce says. “Just. You need to see it? Instead of me telling you about it?”

Not for a million dollars will Bryce tell him.

If people on the internet are talking about how hot they think Jared’s dad is again, he swears to god —

One of my favourite subplots that doesn’t make the main narrative — Don the DILF.

“Erin’s trending again,” Bryce says.

Jared’s sister trending on twitter is really not something that Jared expected to happen twice. Like, even in a big Canadian market, that’s getting slightly absurd for a the sister of a middle-six forward.

Imagine how she feels. (She again thinks it’s funny)

Bryce gently kicks him in the shin. “You might want to look it up.”

“No thanks,” Jared says.

Bryce kicks him again. “Seriously, though.”

“If I do will you stop kicking me?” Jared asks.

“Yeah,” Bryce says.

Please look this up out of your own volition so you won’t shoot Bryce Marcus, Messenger.

“J,” Bryce says. “He’s clearly not going to pick up.”

Jared hits ‘end’ and then ‘call’ for the fourth time.

Surely he will pick up the fourth time you call to yell at him.

“Maybe just leave a message?” Bryce suggests weakly.

“Are you fucking my sister?” Jared asks when the operator’s finished telling him the number he has dialled is currently unavailable, because Julius couldn’t even be bothered to set his voicemail message after literal years in Canada. “And pick up your fucking phone, Halla, I swear to god.”

Bryce regrets his suggestion.

“What,” he says.

“He’s probably not going to want to call you back?” Bryce says. “If you sound like that?”

“Nobody cares what Julius wants!” Jared says.

“Um,” Bryce says. “Are you — okay?”

Bryce increasingly realising Jared was completely blindsided by this and mentally rewinding to every time he thought Jared was just ignoring the relationship out of pettiness.

“You knew about this,” Jared says with dawning realisation.

Bryce looks shifty.

“You knew,” Jared says. “And you let me find out from twitter.”

“I didn’t know know,” Bryce says.

They have not been formally told, but nobody has been hiding this from them. See: several parts ago, when Erin was visiting a friend in Edmonton (nobody told Jared it was a university friend, as he stated, Jared just assumed it must be because he knows Erin didn’t keep in touch with anyone from high school or earlier. Neither Matheson sibling is a big friend maker)

“Jared,” Bryce says, then, from the other side of a slammed door, “Hey, that’s my room!”

Jared is sulking, so by all rights the sulking room now belongs to him.

He’d ask if the picture was misinterpreted, like it was with Bryce, but there really aren’t that many interpretations for a kiss. Sure, some cultures greet one another with kisses, but as far as Jared is aware, the Finns are not one of them, and neither are the Mathesons.

Ah yes, the famed Matheson culture. Signs of affection are ribbing, mockery, and snide.

And even if a kiss on the mouth was a Finnish greeting, it’d be one Julius would pointedly not do. Julius doesn’t like participating in things.

This is so accurate but hilarious from Jared because it’s one of the reasons they get along so well.

He’s not your liney anymore. Erin replies. P sure both your current lineys are already taken.

Also he’s literally on a rival team now? That’s like the anti-liney.

Ene-liney.

So you’re not denying it. Jared texts. He originally ended the text an exclamation mark, but that looked too dramatic. He’s fine. He’s chill.

So you’re not denying it!

Is this a thing? Jared writes, after deleting the two extra question marks that somehow popped up.

Is this a thing???

How long has this been a thing? Jared asks.

Officially? Like two weeks.

Before this there was some hanging out. But the euphemism-y kind of hanging out. And some texting while Julius was away. But Julius came back from Finland early, even before it was ‘officially’, which makes it a full-on Thing.

Unofficially? Jared asks.

Idk. You know how it is, Erin replies.

Jared does not know how it is. He can’t even begin to guess what she’s referring to, he has so little awareness of how it is. He met Bryce and that was it for him. Well. Give or take a few weeks and a minor grudge.

Oh we’re calling it a minor grudge now?

Wait no you don’t you were engaged at my age hahaha

Erin obviously knows Jared was engaged at nineteen, and gave him shit for it at the time (her ‘I can’t believe you’re going to be a child bride’ is one of my favourite lines in the entire series) but now that she’s nineteen herself?

His phone lights up with another text, which is just hahahahahaha and crying laughing emojis.

She’s dying what were they THINKING.

“Can I come in?” Bryce asks meekly.

“Fine,” Jared says, since it’s not like he’s talking to Erin anymore. Though he doesn’t know why Bryce would want to. This is the sulking room, and Bryce doesn’t seem sulky about this at all.

Only Big Sulky Babies allowed.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you?” Bryce says, perching on the bed beside Jared as Jared tries to forcibly wipe his brain clean. “I just — kind of thought it was something we both knew but we were like, pretending we didn’t know so you could ignore it forever.”

Look at Bryce supportively pretend something doesn’t exist because he fears for Jared’s sanity.

“Don and I are cool now,” Bryce says. “Sort of. Mostly. He hasn’t insulted me to my face in like – a while. Huh. That’s a good sign.”

Don did mean it about Bryce being a member of the family after he married Jared. You don’t insult family. Mock? Sure. Tease? Absolutely. But insult? Absolutely not.

“Why didn’t someone actually say ‘hey Jared, you do know this is a thing, right?’” Jared asks. His immediate family and Julius all know that Jared can be, well —

Someone should have made sure he was aware, is the point.

“I honestly think Erin just wanted to see how long it’d take you to figure it out if no one actually said ‘hey Jared, Erin and Julius are dating’,” Bryce says. “And apparently the answer was a picture on twitter?”

Everyone assumed Jared already knew and was pointedly ignoring it. Except Erin. She knew that Jared would yell at her or Julius when he knew, and therefore he was still in the dark.

Bryce looks shifty again. “Ash told me that Erin said that?”

Which means Ash knows, obviously. And that Ash and Bryce have discussed this. So Chaz must know. And Maia. Not that babies know things, just —

Don’t worry, Jared, I promise Maia didn’t know before you.

Fucking Oilers fans found out about this before Jared did. Flames fans did.

He doesn’t know why, but the fact Flames fans knew this before Jared did makes this so much worse than if it was just Oilers fans.

This is simultaneously a weird thing to get stuck on, yet also totally understandable. Oilers fans are Julius fans. Flames fans are Julius haters. But also may remember Erin from Bryce drama. Also fuck Flames fans, all Jared’s homies hate Flames fans.

Jared’s phone buzzes from where he tossed it after the last emoji round. He bets it’s more hahahahas. Possibly some skulls. Erin likes to die laughing.

She can’t hahaha any longer, she’s already dead from laughing.

150. Affront

Jared thinks people are supposed to be afraid of death. He’s pretty sure that’s common, reasonable. When threatened with death, people should feel fear. But what is Julius Halla doing right now? He’s laughing. At Jared.

He basically lived with you, Jared, he knows just how little true bite there is in you.

“Stop laughing,” Jared hisses. “You traitor.”

“Who am I a traitor to,” Julius says. He sounds vaguely curious, like someone who’s been accused of something ludicrous, and is interested to see how you came to that conclusion. Which is rich, for a traitor.

But who is he a traitor TO, Jared?

“Me!” Jared says. “And friendship! And lineys! And — there’s a code!”

I do enjoy Jared continually using Julius being his liney as a reason when they have now been divisional rivals longer than they were ever linemates.

“You think it’s the definition of toxic masculinity,” Julius says. “And that it frequently treats women as objects and prizes to be won, and also acts like showing affection towards your friends is gay. And you’re gay, and you think showing affection is disgusting, so obviously there is no connection.”

He listens <3

“She’s like, ten!” Jared says. “She’s way too young for you.”

Julius is very quiet. “How much older than you is—“

There’s about a two and a half year age difference between Erin and Julius. Bryce and Jared’s is just shy of four years. As Julius well knows, the bastard.

“Eating my food and dating my sister,” Jared says. “Who is a child.”

“How old were you when you got engaged?” Julius asks.

Jared can only an inarticulate sound of rage in answer, because Julius knows exactly how old he was when he got engaged.

The answer is ‘exactly as old as Erin is now’. As Julius is well aware, the BASTARD. Also, a missing word, my bad.

“Wait,” Jared says, suddenly horrified. More horrified. “You’re not engaged, are you?”

“No!” Julius says, sounding equally horrified.

This question isn’t the reason Julius doesn’t want to get married, but it certainly did not help.

“How did this even happen,” Jared moans. “Wait. Don’t tell me. I don’t want to know anything. Why didn’t you tell me.”

This feels like a trick question.

“I wanted to wait to tell you in person,” Julius says. “Because I was concerned you’d be, well. You know.”

People keep telling Jared he knows things that he does not know.

“I don’t know,” he says.

“Hysterical,” Julius says.

“I am not hysterical!” Jared says.

This might be more believable if Jared hadn’t shrieked that last bit.

The fact Bryce bursts out laughing in the living room contradicts that statement, but Julius can’t hear him. And maybe it’s coincidental laughter. Maybe Bryce is watching something funny. Because Jared is not hysterical.

“Wait, Erin didn’t think I’d be hysterical?” Jared says.

Look, Jared may deny he’s hysterical, but also — why didn’t Erin think he’d be hysterical? Even if he isn’t. Because he is not. But also — really?

For all of Erin’s many…many…many faults, an inability to predict Jared’s behaviour is unfortunately not one of them. She used her predictive ability for blackmail purposes way too much when they were younger, always caught him in the act when he was breaking the few house rules he ever broke then threatened to snitch if Jared didn’t do shit for her. He made her so many grilled cheese sandwiches. To this day he associates grilled cheese with smug smiles and extortion.

Admission of hysteria. Also Jared makes an excellent grilled cheese sandwich. Worth surveillance for blackmail purposes for sure.

“But I was in Finland at the beginning of summer,” Julius says. “And then Bryce injured his shoulder, and you went to Vancouver, and there was no good time. And then twitter.”

Julius, if asked, would say they were a thing months earlier than Erin would. But they had not yet defined the relationship.

“She’s fine,” Julius says. “She thinks it’s funny.”

He sounds faintly scandalised. Which is understandable, because it’s not funny.

“Did you tell her it’s not funny,” Jared says.

“I did,” Julius says. “She says she gets to decide if it’s funny or not.”

“But it’s not funny,” Jared says.

“I know,” Julius says.

Counterpoint from Erin: it’s fucking hilarious, you’re both just boring.

“Don’t like —“ Jared says, then pauses, because there are a lot of different demands warring in him right now. “That’s my sister, Halla.”

“I know,” Julius says. “Would it help if I told you I have…strong…feelings—“

“Gross,” Jared says. “Stop talking.”

“Okay,” Julius says, sounding greatly relieved.

I love their friendship. Every time feelings are involved they both react like cats getting sprayed with water.

“No,” Jared says. “Obviously it is. Did you know that they were together?”

There’s a silence.

“Mom?” Jared says.

“…did you not?” his mom asks. “Jared!”

NOBODY was hiding this from Jared. Nobody.

“Erin’s spent more time in Edmonton than Calgary since her semester ended,” mom says.

“She has a friend there,” Jared says, then, “Oh.”

Yes.

There's only one direct reference to Erin and Julius’ relationship before Jared finds out in the series, because I had to ride a careful line there, as Jared hadn’t noticed anything, so his POV wouldn’t really reflect the information he wasn’t paying attention to.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jared demands. ‘Friend’ is not telling him. ‘Friend’ is a euphemism you use when the other person already knows.

“I thought you knew!” his mom says. “And were just immaturely pretending that as long as you didn’t acknowledge it then it wasn’t actually happening!”

Jared thinks it might be a concerning sign that the two people who know him best both assume he thinks that if he pretends something hard enough, it won’t happen.

Yes that might indicate something about you, Jared.

“Yes!” Jared says. “Why aren’t you mad about this? Your daughter’s dating a hockey player. A hockey player. And you’re letting her?”

“You’re a hockey player, Jared,” his mom says. “As is your husband. And literally all of your friends.”

This isn’t exactly Grace’s mom upon finding out she was dating Raf.

“That’s just people in general, sweetie,” his mom says. “And we know Julius is a nice young man.”

“He is not,” Jared says. Julius is many things, but he is not nice.

“You know what I mean by nice, Jared,” his mom says.

He’s not a nice boy, but he is a good one. Also he speaks Matheson quite fluently.

“You can’t just assume that I like him.”

“Jared,” his mom says. “You love that boy. You brought him home for Christmas.”

“Out of the kindness of my heart,” Jared says.

“You brought home someone you don’t like for Christmas out of the kindness of your heart,” his mom says. “And then you invited him to your wedding. As one of the handful of guests who wasn’t immediately related to you or Bryce. Out of the kindness of your heart.”

Jared, we all know there is not even close to that much kindness in your heart.

“Obviously you like him, or he wouldn’t be one of your best friends,” his mom says. “And since you’re choosy about who you’re friends with, that means a lot. You have extremely good taste in friends, when you actually bother to make them.”

Jared picks at the hem of his shorts.

Jared thinks it’s quite rude for his mom to use facts and reason against him when he is intent on being unreasonable.

“Gross, love,” Jared says.

“I won’t tell Erin you love her, I promise,” his mom says.

“Good,” Jared says. “Ew.”

How dare anyone say he loves his (demon) sister.

“Jared,” his mom says. “Are you making this all about you?”

“No,” Jared says.

“Jared,” his mom says.

“Well it’s a little bit about me, isn’t it!” Jared says. “He’s my friend. And liney.”

“Former liney,” his mom says. Everyone’s so fixated on that part. Liney status can last past being teammates. Look at Jared and Chaz: linemates for life. Even though Bryce subsequently stole Chaz a little, despite the fact they played on completely different lines on the Flames. Not that it’s stealing. Couples share.

Jared can share. Look at how good Jared is at sharing. He only holds Bryce befriending Chaz against him a little, years down the line. That’s sharing.

Eventually Julius is going to get exposed to Erin’s sparkling personality.

He’s had some exposure therapy, rooming with Jared.

Jared would mention that long-distance relationships are highly prone to failure, but he’s pretty sure mom would bring up how much of his relationship with Bryce involved long-distance, and Jared is frankly sick of people reminding him of his own extremely successful relationship, and not letting him be hypocritical.

What bullshit.

He hates arguing with his mom. It’s like arguing with himself, except worse, because at least when he argues with himself, he always technically wins.

The best kind of argument.

“You remind me so much of your dad right now,” mom says.

“Mom!” Jared says.

“A little Don in the making,” his mom says. “He’d be so proud.”

Jared tries to tell her to take it back, but all he can manage is an inarticulate sound of rage. Again.

The cruelest thing you could say to him.

“I got Thai from that place on Burrard you really like,” Bryce says, then, all in a rush, “Sorry for assuming you knew about Julius and Erin and were just pretending you didn’t instead of like, actually not knowing. If I knew you actually didn’t know I would have told you. Or made Erin tell you because it wouldn’t be my place to tell you or. Are you mad at me?”

Sala Thai, for anyone curious. Also, poor Bryce. He really did think Jared knew.

“Did you get me soup to shut me up?” Jared asks.

“I got you it because it’s your favourite?” Bryce says, looking both hurt and confused.

Poor, poor Bryce.

“—and doesn’t he realise what Erin’s like?” Jared says. “Because he is going to be unpleasantly surprised when he gets to know her a little better.”

“Uh,” Bryce says. “I think he’s had a pretty good preview of what Erin’s like?”

BRYCE, NO. I mean, you are 100% correct, but NO.

“We are nothing alike,” Jared says.

“Erin made the exact same face when I said that,” Bryce says. “Like. That’s almost creepy.”

“You’ve said this to her?” Jared says.

“Yeah, because you’re both—“ Bryce says, then, “Ow! She did that too!”

Why do Mathesons keep smacking Bryce’s arm when he tells them the truth?

“We’re nothing alike,” Jared mutters.

Bryce says nothing, but he’s got this look on his face like ‘I’m humouring you right now by not arguing, but you know and I know that you’re full of shit’.

“Stop — looking at me with that face,” Jared says.

Bryce huffs out a laugh. “Erin said—“

Jared can’t hear him.

“Jared,” Bryce says, muffled. “Jared, I know you can hear me.”

Jared cannot.

Erin wasn’t immature enough to put her hands over her ears though, that one’s all Jared.

“Take it back,” Jared says.

“No,” Bryce says. “I’m not pretending something isn’t true just because you don’t like it, that’s ridiculous.”

Jared picks up his noodles.

“I got you soup,” Bryce says sadly as Jared stomps right back to the sulking room, this time with dinner.

Poor, poor Bryce.

[skeleton-mischief]

Coffee Serrif

Does it really matter? No, but that doesn't mean that you're safe from his ever watching eyes

*FS!Gold Papyrus has said enough

- Official height is 6'4

- He/They

- Selectively mute

- Would play the Drums

- An artist, he has a box filled with old sketchbooks and still gets more even now. His favorite is using charcoal

- Consumes Whipped Cream

- Feels insecure in his friendships, since he doesn't only struggle socializing, but he isn't sure when someone actually is sincere with their interest

- Good friends with Rus, Stretch, and Cash

- Grows bashful from praise, he can't handle it

- Empathetic, kind, open minded, creative, timid, passive, intuitive, will avoid fights, pessimistic, impatient, reserved, and sensitive

- A cat person, he's a hub for them

- Video game expert genius. Would be excellent if you handed him a new game and controller

- Uses notes to communicate, if he talks he stutters and messes up frequently

- Curses rarely, only a handful of times

- A master sharpshooter who was taught by Wine

- Loves coffee drowned with whipped cream and caramel

- Likes chocolate, loves dark chocolate the most though or caramel chocolate

- Loves eating rye bread

- Once close with someone, he adores physical affection and is clingy

- Doesn't admit his frustration when Wine constantly tries to do everything for him, since he likes to do things on his own sometimes

- Grew to see Razz, Carmine, and Powder as role models overtime

- Knows sign language

- Wears gloves due to his sensitivity

- Stims with his hands

- Doesn't smoke often, but he uses matches when he does

- magic smells like hazelnut, magic tastes like toffee

- A soft romantic

- Prefers handshakes

- likes Hello Kitty, his favorite character is Choco

- Calls Chara "Kitty" because they're small and remind him of a cat (it's fucking cute bro)

- Cries vary in quality often, he cries a lot

- Would call his lover peaches

- He doesn't seem like it, but he's physically pretty agile and strong. He gets irritated when he's belittled

- Sometimes, when frustrated, he'll actively ignore someone or throw something to get them to shut up

- He can't be bothered with doing a lot of things, such as drinking or partying

- He loves any sort of video games and is an excellent gamer. The moment someone shows interest, he'd have to be reassured that he's not talking too much

- He's curious of humans, but he doesn't blindly trust them

- He doesn't judge others and often is a silent observer to figure out his opinion of them

- He has very acute senses, and he'll dodge drama as soon as it's present. He slips away with whoever he's spending time with easily

- When meeting Chara, he had a piece of paper with a smiling face as he was overly friendly as he joked how to greet another human despite his terrifying aura

- Very internet savvy, he's dangerous since he can hack into anything for information

- Like every swapfell variant of Papyri, he loves fast food

- He can be very mischievous, him and Rus are very slick with their pranks

- his hoodie changes what it says based off what he's feeling

- He has a black list which is to identify who is considered an enemy and who he watches. You do not want to be on that

- He visits multiple locations, but when he's in public he usually stalks around the corners without feeling the need to say something

- He's very well educated and can be seen reading up on mechanical engineering, he gave up working on the machine however

- He doesn't remember Gaster, except for faint sensations and memories in his dreams. They're never pleasant

- He doesn't actually like the Queen, but he works for her and knows how to behave in her presence

- He always has a hood or something on his head, he doesn't like it being bare

- His eyelights don't frequently light up unless he is surprised or feeling an intense emotion, such as crying or getting flustered. His magic is much smoother(?) in appearance and yet can feel more intense

Closing Notes: i honestly want to flesh him out more than what I have for him. He's fun and I love his character, this might be updated or something since he's just sooooooo- OURGH

[casteliacityramen]

Munday Tuesday Lore Post: Humanity - Threat Assessment REBUTTAL

Scribe and Artificer J., I am writing to further inform you of our opinions on the subject of your most recent letter. Yes, your 'e-mails' did go through. Stop sending them. No, we will not accept the "good old-Unovan values of one on one combat" on the issue, no matter how many "fite me" messages you send. I am aware that this 'e-mail' is a lot more convenient than our courier system, but perhaps you are spending too much time on this "internet" that you so adore. This new messaging system of yours is enough to handle, as is. I feel that I must, at the very least, clarify our reasoning behind our verdict. For the most part, the council agrees with your assessment. Yes. Humanity is destined for greatness. Yes. Humanity shows limitless promise. Yes. We do take inspiration from their innovation (it'd be strange not to address this due to the way we talk to each other now). But humanity is an abnormality to the point of absurdity. They are our precursors, long before His Majesty Arceus gifted us with life, yet they still show signs of incremental growth. They repeat mistakes. They are prone to infighting. Their restrictive age keeps them from making wise decisions. For Arceus' sake, they only recently realized that it may be important to write things down. They are too unpredictable. Worst of all, they possess a power far greater than you give them credit for. Their abnormal power to persuade. Like you say, they have made complex societies, and have even gone as far as to borrow pokemons' powers for a mutually beneficial gain. What's mind-boggling is how oblivious they are to their power. No one is arguing with you that Humanity has cemented themselves as the top sapient life on the planet. Our scholars still debate on whether or not they should be classified as psychic-types due to this feat and the discussion is far from resolved. Perhaps this discussion would have been finished were it not for the fact that they are constantly changing, as you have mentioned in your assessment. Frankly, my dear friend, if I may be honest, humanity terrifies us. Imagine, if you will, the Order brought into chaos because we were convinced to make a decision without careful deliberation. Like you say, humanity barrels its way towards greatness. However, we cannot afford such rashness due to the gravity of our work. Which brings me to our next point. I understand your frustrations in our decision-making process. In comparison to mortal life, you are right in that we take too long to make a decision. This is an issue we hope to address in the future. However, these rules are written in blood. Yours included, if I'm not mistaken. We guide the entirety of existence in their path--there is no margin for error. You, of all people, should know this, given your current assignment. Your mind seems cluttered. Perhaps you need a reduction in your duties. As scribe, artificer, and now warden of some… particular probationary members, you seem to be spread thin. Do let me know if it's too much for you. Kindly, Head Scholar and Council Member Lok P. S. Are we still on for Dungeons and Dragonites? Steward Lia would like to join us. P. S. S. I know I've been pencil pushing for the past couple thousand years, but I bet I could kick your ass. Even with your blessing from Lady Victini.

[yes-i-am-happyaspie]

Happyapie's 2023 Sicktember Master List:

Lack of Self-Care G

With Pepper out of the country and a plethora of projects requiring his attention, Tony fails to participate in any kind of self-care. As a result, he’s overcome by a pounding headache. At some point, Peter shows up with a guilt-inducing look of harried concern.

- Hopelessly Bad at Self-Care - Pounding Headache

Don't Come Crying to Me G

In a moment of exasperation, Tony says to Peter ‘Don’t come crying to me when you get sick’. Peter takes the instructions to heart and a few months later when Tony invites him to help with a mission, he decides to keep the fact he woke up feeling awful under wraps. That goes just about as well as you would expect

- Hiding an Illness - “Wear Your Coat, You’ll Catch a Cold”

For a Friend T

Peter finds out Bucky is sick and spends his weekend at the Tower balancing between spending time with Tony and making sure his friend is taking care of himself. When it’s time for Peter to go home, he asks Tony to keep looking after Bucky. Reluctantly, Tony agrees... Of course, Peter can't stay away for long.

- “You’re a Jerk When You’re Sick” - ‘‘I shouldn’t be worried about you, but for some reason, I am’’ - Coughing Fit

Heat Below the Rubble G

Peter has a fever. And a night terror. All while asleep on the couch in Tony's lab. As Peter talks in his sleep, Tony finds out all about the fight with The vulture and the building that Peter was temporarily trapped beneath.

- Persistent Fever - Confused/Disoriented

Ned Leeds' Beginner's Guide to Faking Sick G

Peter really, really REALLY doesn't want to go on the scheduled class field trip. Ned doesn't understand why. But being the good friend that he is, Ned supports Peter's decision to be weird about it. And provides him with a comprehensive, step-by-step guide to faking sick. And well- things don't exactly go as planned...

- Beginner's Guide to Faking Sick - Anxious Stomach

AutoCorrect: Teen to Todd G

While staying with Tony, Peter comes down with a common cold. Unsure of how to help with the situation, Tony turns to the internet.

Casually, he typed into his phone’s search bar, ‘How to take care of a sick teenager.’ Although the devices autocorrect, promptly updated the search to ‘How to take care of a sick toddler.’ After noticing the unwarranted correction, he looked thoughtfully at Peter. The kid was lying pathetically across the couch, staring vacantly at some weird-looking cartoon on the television. Suddenly, the new search terms didn’t feel all that far off and he thought to himself, ‘Eh. Close enough.’

- Consulting the Internet/Web MD - Forehead Kisses

Face First(aid) T

While out on patrol, Peter decided he might not be feeling all that well. Eventually he decides to swing home but his stomach is iffy, his body aches and his brain is a bit sluggish. As a result he ends up slamming face first into a billboard, creating an explosion of pain around his nose. His AI was quick to alert Mr. Stark and bring up an ETA countdown in the corner of his HUD. He can’t decide if he was annoyed or relieved.

“Hey, Kid. Does your face hurt?”

- Sick and Injured - "I could Really Use a Hug Right About Now"

Signs of Sickness G

Peter wakes up one morning feeling tired and achy. He doesn’t think too much of it until his stomach starts to hurt on the way home from school. He tries to tell Tony he doesn't feel good but after dropping his phone there’s a language barrier larger than he knows how to fill in such a harried state. But everything ends up okay. Tony and Pepper are there for him.

- Sick in an Inconvenient Place. - Terms of Endearment/Nicknames

Happy to Stay G

Tony has been out of the county, and Happy has been tasked with making sure Peter is there to greet him when he gets back. Only Happy wasn’t really expecting the kid to be sick when he picked him up from school. Nor was he expecting to have to coax said kid into admitting it. But there he was, suddenly in charge of taking care of his superhero boss’s sick superhero pseudo son. [Happy's pov!]

- "What happened to your phenomenal immune system, huh?" - “Did you just sneeze?” - “The only place we’re going is to the pharmacy”

On Edge T

When Peter heads out on Patrol feeling overly exhausted and a little under the weather, May asks Tony to keep an eye on him. Tony happily takes on the task and everything is going perfectly well. Until the Spider-Suit’s GPS stalls right in the middle of the Queensboro Bridge and Tony decides his best course of action is to, well- panic. Even if it isn’t necessary.

- “I should have stayed home” - “I’m so sorry”

These are all a part of the 25 fic series,  Sicktember 2021-2023

[vig1lantnakia]

:// LOADING FILE: 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟷𝟷𝟶 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟷𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶 𝚉𝟹𝚁𝚉𝚅𝚁𝙰 𝙽𝙰𝙺𝟷𝙰 𝚂𝙰𝙰𝙳 ...

... 𝙿𝙴𝙽𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 𝙵𝚁𝙾𝙼 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝚂𝙸𝙳𝙴: INPUT ACCESS CODE TO PROCEED...

Character Name: Nakia Saad Nicknames: Kia, [ Hacker Name: N1X, Nix ] Place of Birth: NYC, USA Birthday: February 12th, 1985 Sexuality: Panromantic Demisexual Gender Identity: Non-binary ( They or Him ) Zodiac: Aquarius MBTI: ISTJ Occupation: Intelligence Agent, Hacker Languages: Arabic, English, Spanish, Japanese Moral Alignment: True Neutral Love Language: Acts of Service

THE BIOGRAPHY ( very mild bullying tw )

Born to a family of immigrants, the importance of hard work is ingrained into you from a young age. NYC isn't an easy city to grow up in, and you see your parents work through numerous shifts at the hospital, one a surgeon, and the other a nurse, they work day and night to make a living. You are a sharp child from a young age, and even if you tend to cause trouble every once in a while, it's nothing that can stick to you. Your teachers call you too smart for your age, just that you need to focus. It's not that you don't work hard- it's just that the moment you get your hands on your first laptop, you spend nights illuminated by its light. You have always had a perchance for gadgetry, trying to break technology apart, and then enhance it or fix it back up, but now, with your own computer, you feel like a new world has been laid in front of your feet. You revel in it. You are lucky that your parents don't realize the sheer amount of time you spend there, and you learn how to code like a pro when you are in high school. Named sort of a recluse, you keep it to yourself most of the time. Again, some teachers find this worrying, but you manage to fly under the radar long enough, get a friend or two, and live through the various nicknames tackled onto you. You don't care about what the bullies think, but you do enjoy hearing them screech when one day, their entire internet history has been posted on the corridors of the school. Who would have done that? Such a shame, guess they will never find out. You get into a prestigious college as a computer science major, full ride, and you find it much easier than high school. People care less about what the silent kid is doing, and the professors don't particularly care if you show up or not. You learn a lot, and it's during your senior year in college that they scout you. Men in black, most would think, are dressed as older college students. This is your first interrogation in which they give you an offer for a new life, which you are reluctant to accept. You love your freedom too much, you love your hacking, you love learning about things before anyone else. It's the offer to teach you more than that that convinces you, and you sign up to be an intelligence agent. Years pass, you learn a lot, and you grow a lot. Though, deep down, you are that same kid who just likes getting the dirt on people. You fly too high, or too low, whichever way the Icarus myth goes, and you get caught by an underground organization. Highly illegal, who dare to blackmail you into doing their dirty work. All you can do is say yes, and try to weave the threads in the background, to get back at them, to free yourself before the agency catches wind of everything that has been going on. Then, before anything else that can be figured out — you wake up on a ship. And you realize things can get more complicated after all.

THE INTERVIEW

“What is the last thing you remember before arriving on the island?”

The light of the sun bothers them. The sense of scenery feels familiar, even though the last time they were interrogated, it was a sterile room with fluorescent lights. This time, the warmth of the sun burns into their skin. "I was working." It's a simple answer, the calculating glare focusing on the person in front of them. They try to soften it up, knowing apprehension is not the best trait when interrogated. They would know, going off from the number of times they have been in this exact spot. The silence makes it clear the person is looking for a better answer. "It was- just like another day, man. I swear." A huff of breath masked as a laugh. "I was in front of my laptop, coding the night away- trying to catch up on some of the tasks that I couldn't finish back at the HQ." A softened truth. Nakia was not working on anything related to his official job at the agency, but the second job they were forced to do. The ultimatum given to them by the underground organization, once they caught wind of Nakia's other 'hobbies' which consisted of them collecting dirt on the rich and the powerful. They aren't here right now, which makes Nakia unsure how to feel. "I was reaching a breakthrough and then — I found myself with a headache on that goddamn boat."

“Do you think you will be remembered or forgotten?”

A loaded question, one that threatens to raise their hackles. This back and forth, which they have little control over, makes them less likely to give up honest answers. "Depends on how long." Their leg shakes up and down under the desk, they begin with a shrug. "If you mean far into the future? I'll be forgotten. In the great expanse of time and space, I do not fool myself to think I am important enough that people will remember me by name." Maybe their deeds, or the event in which they would whistleblow who they wished, or managed to turn down that organization. However, as it stands, with them being in the middle of nowhere, it seems completely impossible. As much as Nakia wants to go back, they have an inkling it's not going to be as easy as some residents were thinking.

“What do you feel you could contribute to life on the island?”

A practical question, one all of them have thought of for they are stranded here, with little from home but their own skills. They nod, a hum at the back of their throat. "Sure. I have an engineering background - when anything technical goes wrong- or we need a solution to an infrastructure problem, I am the person to call." A little smirk on their lips, their eyes move down to their palm, the crackling of energy that could not be seen, but one that they felt. "Plus, these powers, will only help us further as we try to make a suitable living here." And then, besides the basic needs of shelter, food, and drinkable water, there are also other aspects Nakia is useful for. Namely, solving mysteries, investigating, and digging where people do not want them to dig. They know how to set up a case, how to gather information. Even if they were almost always behind the scenes back at home ( and behind their computer ), it does not feel that much different to look for clues as to why they ended up here, to learn where these powers came from. "I also have a… Useful background when it comes to solving problems. I think it is particularly handy to have here, considering everything."

“Do you think with your heart or your brain?”

There is the true answer, and then there is an answer they are willing to give. Of course, it ends up being the latter that's uttered from their lips. "I think with my brain. I am a scientist at heart." With their degrees in computer science and industrial engineering, this is the most palatable answer that they are willing to give. Not the one where they feel irrationally annoyed at being plucked from where they were, or the revenge that swims in their veins when they think of the organization that dared to blackmail them. There have been decisions in Nakia's life where they acted on emotions rather than rationality, though those have often led to less than favorable outcomes, which is why they do not wish to accept it out loud. "I am a highly analytical person, I like calculating various outcomes, and choosing the best one after." when they aren't wrapped in thoughts of fury or revenge, this is the truth.

“What are you most curious about regarding the island?”

Fingers tap on the surface of the wooden desk, a plethora of questions that have been revolving around their mind, threaten to reach the surface. Tongue pressing to the inside of their cheek, they try to pick one that would make them seem less irritable, less apprehensive about everything. "I suppose- the powers, to begin with." A supernatural feat, one bestowed to each and every one of them- but for what purpose? What was the aim? "And where exactly we are would be good to know." So that they could get out, eventually. When it comes to actual questions they would ask, it would simply be 'Why?', putting them all here, on this island, cameras everywhere, phantom eyes at every corner, without a purpose — it all seems like someone is playing a game on them. A fucked up one, and Nakia does not have any answers yet. They hate this with their entire being.

THE CONNECTIONS ( mostly pre-island! )

- People from another life: Childhood friends / enemies who knew Nakia in high school or university. Before they disappeared from the face of the earth and became an intelligence agent. This could go a few different ways, maybe they kept in contact, and Nakia told your muse they have been working for a tech company, or they did disappear and this is the first time these two would be meeting after almost two decades. - Family friends: Nakia's parents work in healthcare, so anyone they touched / saved / helped would be very interesting. Nakia never wanted to pursue that career themself, and they would be apprehensive about someone who knows their past to this extent. Free to explore. - Government colleagues: If your muse has a job related to the government, maybe Nakia and they could have met up for work. Nakia could have done work on your computer, or database, or any other thing. Maybe your muse knew about what he was doing, or they just told them they were an IT guy. - Actually just an IT guy: Okay, hear me out, maybe they lived close, and your muse actually needed an IT guy. Nakia found this all too amusing, and actually played into it. So now, when you need your laptop to be fixed or your TV isn't working properly, you can Nakia, and they come by. Payment would need to be non-monetary, they'd want homemade food or something like that, but we can discuss. Maybe friends or other stuff can be plotted. - Coffee pals: When Nakia is in a slump, they go to this small café, and spend hours there. Maybe your muse was in a slump of another variety, or they just found Nakia interesting and approached them. This became somewhat of a routine, and they became friends.

[chenlezip]

.⊹˖ᯓ★. ݁₊ love at first like | a mark lee smau

005: late night talks and accidental butterflies.

it’s been about a month since you and mark signed the contract and started fake dating just to appease the internet after he ‘accidentally’ liked your post. things had been smooth, you both considered each other a friend now at least, so there’s that. it was about half 12, you were about to head to bed but saw that mark decided to facetime you. could you decline? yes.. but you wanted to see what he needed from you and so you slid the arrow to the right and picked up.

his face appeared on your screen; soft eyes that looked droopy at the late time of night, his lips jutted out in a slight pout but turned into a light smile as he saw you picked up, messy black hair like he had been running his hand through it multiple times (which yes he had done because he was nervous about phoning you but who else would pick up at this time?).

“i knew you would be awake but i didn’t think you’d answer,” his voice rung out, deeper than usual and a slight croak to it. you chuckle, “i was curious to what you wanted, you’re awake late aren’t you? you’ve got a tight schedule this week with your solo album, what’s up mark?”

it started off as a nice conversation, talked about some more ideas for fake dates that you could both try out together - maybe go visit a new place you haven’t been to, try some new foods? but it delved into a deeper more personal conversation. mark opened up about the fears he feels about falling out of love with music with how much he spends time making his own, the pressure he feels and the fear he has to let people down when he’s known as an all rounder. you never expected it, but nonetheless, you talked with him through his struggles that he outed to you.

you decide that maybe it’s best to get your feelings out too, after reassuring him, you explained the pressure you felt too. the struggles of being a female composer and lyricist in the industry that focuses too much on social media just to get big. to get somewhere, to the point you can grow big and actually have your talent noticed. it was hard, truly it was and you wished that you weren’t so invested in all of it because that would mean you had a chance of doing something else that might be better. something that was more… you? whatever l.” that meant.

and the advice that mark comes back to you with is really thoughtful, explaining how he felt that exact way but there’s people in his life that really pushed him to go for what he wanted to do, even if he doubted himself, even if he couldn’t see his talent, others did and wanted him to do great. you smile, nodding and listening to his words as you felt yourself get a bit emotional from it all. “thank you, for this mark. for listening and being such a kind soul.”

“no, no- thank you yn, for letting me have this conversation with you and for letting me open up about my troubles. i’m happy i made you comfortable enough to open up too. i think we both really needed a chat like this, a chat with someone who doesn’t really know so much about yourself, you know? and sorry if i put too much on you, by the way.” you shook your head, “you didn’t. i think i put too much on you.. but seriously, thank you mark. shit, it’s late isn’t it?”

you see him looking to the top left of his phone screen, mumbling a curse word under his breath too, “yeah.. i didn’t realise we talked for so long, i’ve gotta be up in about 2 hours.. i’ll bid you a goodnight yn, sleep well and have a good day ahead. i know im busy but just text me whenever alright?”

“mhm, same goes. goodnight mark.” and with that, the call ends and you’re just stuck staring at your phone for a little while, in shock of the conversation and why you have butterflies swimming around in your stomach. was this normal? haha, surely it was right? you just couldn’t wrap your head around why your heart beat a little faster, a little warmer too. maybe the notes app will help..

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[inwintersolitude]

- April 3rd 2025 -

What states have you been to in the past year? Ohio (where I live), Illinois, Texas, Virginia (where I used to live), Maryland, Delaware, and Pennsylvania.

Have you ever sleepwalked? Nope.

What year was your house built? 1997.

Do you feel like you have more in common with men or with women? This is really complicated for me to answer. I feel like my brain is mostly genderless. I've always been quite tomboyish, and a ton of my interests are things that way more men happen to be interested in rather than women - stuff like aviation, engineering, physics, and space exploration - so I relate more to men in that sense. I've also been told that I "talk and carry myself like a man" and I don't disagree, so there's that as well. But of course I also relate to women, primarily in regards to how the world/society treats us because we're female. I don't know, I guess I don't entirely lean one way or the other.

What's your favorite superhero movie? I'm not really into superhero movies.

Do you want children? Why/why not? No. My ultimate reason is I simply don't want to be a mother; I'm not a maternal/nurturing type of person, I don't like being around children that much, and that's just not a role that would fit me at all. I have a ton of secondary reasons, too. Kids are loud, you can't live spontaneously and do whatever you want/whenever you want, massive decrease in free time, etc. etc. etc.

Do you have any credit card debt? No.

Have you ever been really late for work because you slept past your alarm? Not that I can remember.

Are you good at reading people? Not really.

Who do you go to for relationship advice? I've never felt the need to seek out relationship advice. My husband and I have a really strong marriage, and any issues that we do run into, we're able to work it out on our own.

What was your favorite way to spend a summer day as a kid? Going on a hike with my family in the national park near my hometown, playing on the swingset in the back yard, going to the pool with friends, exploring the woods behind my childhood home.

What's the longest you've worked without a day off? Around 10 or 11 days, back when I was working in charter jet operations. I liked the job itself but the schedule was really rough.

Have you ever been scammed? Yeah, I was a super naive 18-year-old and had just moved out on my own, and these two guys were going door-to-door selling magazine subscriptions (this was back in the day when stuff like that wasn't unusual) and all the sign-up stuff looked legit so I subscribed to an aviation magazine and wrote them a check. But it turned out to be fake and they were pocketing all the checks people were writing them.

Do you know anyone who works in the tech industry in Silicon Valley? Yep, one of my uncles works for a networking hardware company in Silicon Valley.

Do you wear eyeliner? Very rarely. I don't really like how eyeliner looks on me.

Did you ever take a personal finance class in school? No. It was offered as an elective, but I didn't take it. I learned all that stuff from my parents.

Where were you the last time you kissed someone? In the hallway by door that goes out to the garage.

How's your mental health? Are you feeling well? I've been doing really well.

Do you struggle with acne? Nope, I've never been acne-prone. My skin is quite dry. The only time I get pimples is if I don't moisturize enough.

Did you have a Xanga page back in the pre-Myspace days? Haha yes. I really liked Xanga.

Around what year did you start using the internet, anyways? Around 2002 or 2003.

Do you have any uncommon interests or hobbies? Yeah I suppose. I'm super interested in spacecraft propulsion systems, and all the new research/development in that field.

What's something that would make you incredibly happy right now? A cure for my worst ailments. No more tachycardia/POTS, no more TMJ pain, no more hyperacusis pain.

What did you do for your 16th birthday? Went out to a nice dinner with my parents, brother, and grandparents. And that weekend, my parents took me to see the Cleveland Orchestra perform Beethoven's 3rd Symphony up at Severance Hall.

What temperature do you keep your thermostat set at in the winter? It's an Ecobee thermostat so the set point varies between 71-73F depending on the time of day, and it goes down to 70F when we're out of the house.

Have you ever been to the Caribbean? Yep. My husband and I went on a cruise for New Years and my 21st birthday in 2011, and we also went to St. Thomas for our honeymoon.

Have you ever fostered an animal? No.

What did you have for breakfast this morning? Buttered toast and fruit salad.

What's your favorite form of exercise? Hiking.

Have you ever drank so much that you passed out? Nope.

[comemeist-blog]

On turning 27 and why I am never deleting my Tumblr

It is 2025. I am turning 27, and I have chosen to do that alone. I spent way too much money on an omakase dinner, and tomorrow, I'll spend even more money on a small cake that I'll eat while finishing my laundry. On the weekend, I'll celebrate my birthday with friends. But before that, I have to clean my kitchen, finish a giant report at work, and fill out scholarship applications. This is not what I imagined I would be doing when I turned 27, but I am old enough to appreciate the mundanity of my adulthood and the brief respites birthdays provide.

When I was 13, 27 felt #very #adult. So adult that I convinced myself that I was either going to 1) die or 2) get married when I hit 27. I was a depressed teenage girl, and, like many of my peers, I craved death but didn't actually want to end it (or deal with the aftermath of trying), so I settled for fantasies to get through the day. One of those was the expiration date-- 27-- because all the #Famous and #Hot Celebrities I read about in magazines died when they were 27, and they had a lot more to live for than I, a depressed teenager rotting in the suburbs, did. But, if I didn't die, I had to get married, because that's what you do when you are a very well-adjusted adult with a long-term (and hopefully rich) boyfriend.

Like many teenage girls in the early 2010s, I assumed said long-term and hopefully boyfriend would be Harry Styles of One Direction. Two years earlier, I had discovered One Direction through a gif of Liam Payne that I found searching Google Images for references of pretty boys to draw poorly for my Deviant Art. The Gif was posted to Tumblr, a website I had heard about in various online forums I had no business being on as a child. I spent an hour clicking through the various rebloggers, searching for more information on One Direction, before I found out about One Direction Twitter through a blog that also posted 90s era Sailor Moon gifs with a feminist slant. Looking at that blog, I thought to myself, "Wow. This is special. This is adult."

Because Tumblr was so #special and #adult, I decided to honor the website's age rules. So I waited. I waited two years, biding my time by bookmarking key Tumblr Blogs shared across the "trash" side of One Direction Twitter and the Sailor Moon themed blog. Bad 1d Imagines, Katara (later, of shrimp fried this rice fame), a very #cool teenager I later learned lived a few towns away from me and fantasized about meeting, etc etc. The minute I turned 13, I opened up an account and followed them all.

Tumblr gave me a community, it gave me guidance, and, most importantly it gave me a space to safely be a girl. I grew up on the internet during the 2000s, which was a decidedly terrible time for being a girl. Genuinely enjoying girly things was a sign of weakness and cringe. Eschewing girly things or embracing Girl Power meant you wanted to be a boy, or worse, were a lesbian. Insisting you had rights, asking for better treatment, or just simply existing as girl invited disdain, hostility, and violence from total strangers. The way people talked about girls on the internet, in magazines, in the news, on the playground, and in my household made it clear that being a girl was the worst thing I could be. There was no way out, and there was no way to win. I was trapped, and I hated it. I wanted to be three years old and enjoying 90s sailor moon and dancing to EVERYBODY by Backstreet Boys. I could settle for reblogging it while British boys sang about how Katy Perry is on replay in my bedroom.

Tumblr not only gave me the language to define this feeling and frustration, it provided me space to explore girlhood and slowly get rid of the negativity I was taught to associate with it. Looking back, I can say it also saved me from going down a right-wing pipeline that many other chronically online white, suburban children with negligent parents fell into in the early 2010s.

I left Tumblr in 2016. I told myself, I was going to college, and it was time to be an #adult, and Tumblr no longer felt #adult. Looking back, I had definitely just hit a boiling point with a few key issues--- the fact that my fave blogs were moving on to Twitter and Youtube, the inescapable amount of Hamilton and Onceler content on the site, the realization that I left a trove of online evidence of my Dr. Who phase, the lingering frustration over never going viral on here, and the creeping realization that I had spent so much time trying to earn strangers approval on the same site that was doing discourse about Onceler p-rn instead of putting effort into my offline friends. But I didn't want to think about that. I couldn't. Instead, I just told myself I simply had gotten everything out of Tumblr that I needed from Tumblr, and it was time to be an adult.

At the very adult age of 27, I decided to log into my Tumblr for the first time in years. It's been a long time coming. A few years ago, I befriended someone who was Tumblr famous (lowkey) and, as expected, is extremely cool and funny. We talk about how thankful we are for it, and how cool and funny it made us, even though it felt like we were in the trenches. We speak in references only known to those who have our specific brand of tumblr brain rot, and exchange stories about 2014 era online drama that were exclusive to our specific feeds.

Two years ago, I half-jokingly predicted a Tumblr resurgence, and they said something like, "resurgence? it never died." Last year, Liam Payne died at 33, an age I couldn't imagine reaching when I first saw that gif, but I now recognize as incredibly young, and I thought about Tumblr. I thought about how I wanted to get married to Harry Styles, and laughed about how I thought I would be getting married at 27.

This year, I started reading Kaitlyn Tiffany's book, "Everything I need from you: How fangirls created the internet as we know it." It's about online culture and One Direction. I justified purchasing it by telling myself I was preparing for grad school and rediscovering more informative forms of entertainment than my current go-to: endlessly scrolling social media sites that monetize my attention spans and then use ad money to subsidize (primarily) right wing content and political movements. In reality, I just love One Direction, fangirls, and the internet-- enough to write a masters thesis about it.

I am 27 and I am nostalgic for Tumblr. And on my 27th birthday, it finally feels right to reconnect with a time in my life where I had the least amount of empathy for myself, on a platform that earnestly set me down the path towards developing that empathy. So here I am, deciding to not only open my blog, but post about this. EW!

A year ago, I never thought I would say those words. But I have spent the past week reading about fangirls and thinking about all the internet history lost because people deleted links or deactivated their tumblrs. I spent the last four years frustrated about all the incomplete, inaccessible, or missing links I find trying to write up a research report for work. I understand the importance of archiving. In the moment, reblogging a Liam Payne gif or a video of a Barney stuffed animal getting shot and then told to meet his maker felt ephemeral and silly. But it can mean some silly researcher, 10 years down the line, has a better understanding of what life was like for you when you were 13 or 16. And it means that you may have a better chance of seeing that video, 20 years down the line, and suddenly getting transported back to your childhood bedroom, and remembering what it felt like to be a teenage girl.

Posting and deleting is a philosophical practice ™ . Embracing your humiliating online archive is, I would argue, an act of historical preservation and radical sincerity, which has become a scarce commodity on social media. As a woman in a Garfield costume once told me, to cringe is proof that you have changed and grown up a little-- to cringe is to be alive.

All this is to say, I'm logging off to do laundry and be a 27 year old adult with job and responsibilities and agency, and thankfully, none of it involves planning a wedding to Harry Styles or anyone else. But I am keeping My Tumblr online, hopefully for forever-- or at least until Yahoo or whoever pulls the plug and this website kicks the bucket. I am doing so because My Tumblr is an archive of my (frankly embarrassing!) history as a dangerously online teenage girl. It serves as a testament to my own development as a person, as evidence of our collective ability to change and grow and possibly even log off, and, maybe as a resource for internet researchers.

happy posting

[rrezshifts]

🍬,🍯,🍭 for the fame dr ask game!!

i'm answering these questions for my oscar piastri formula 1 reality !!sorry it took so long btw, had low motivation then got busy

🍬 CANDID CANDY : what photos remind you of the times when you're not on red carpets, talk shows, or camera? . . . AUSTRALIA AND HOME. In Formula 1 your entire job is on camera, either with Netflix following you, having to do press, or having news outlets on high alert following your every move on and off track. So the only times when I'm not being watched and not other people's entertainment is during breaks. We get breaks in between race weekends that can be 1-2 weeks long, and we also get out summer and winter breaks which are usually 1-3 months long. Usually during those longer vacations I spend time with my family and friends in Italy or America. But as I got closer to Oscar again, I would spend vacations with his family in Australia. Him and I would enjoy time with and without his family, often leaving the house to go to the beach or walking around window shopping or eating lunch and dinner.

I would also spend time in Monaco during shorter breaks. I was offered significant money by McLaren when they signed me to replace Norris. It was enough for me to buy an apartment in Monaco. I like walking around and window shopping, going hiking, or just walking around the streets around my apartment. That is until Oscar moved into my apartment building, and then we begun to hang out together frequently outside of race weekends.

🍯 HONEST HONEY POT : any juicy/niche secrets you want to share with the rest of us? . . . DRIVER AFFAIR. I’ve said this already, but it’s literally just my friends with benefits like relationship with Max Verstappen. The general public will literally never know about this or find out it happened until either of us is retired and in our own committed relationships. We had frequent hookups since the 2022 FIA Prize Giving Ceremony for like almost, if not about, a year. I ended things with Max when my feelings for Oscar got too serious to feel comfortable continuing to sleep without him. He holds no hard feelings, Max and I continue to be close friends. The only people who know are the crew and team members as well as any drivers who are suspicious of our closeness, and then Oscar when I come clean to him about the relationship before we start getting serious.

🍭 LOVABLE LOLLIPOP : what characteristics do you have that makes the internet/news outlets love you so much in your dr? . . . HONESTY AND CONFUSION. I’m brutally honest, not in a rude way. Just in a, “Why would I sugarcoat this?” way. Most of the time I’ll just say things how they are which can be shocking and sometimes funny or entertaining to those who are easy to please. I can also at times have a quick and deadpan wit, AT TIMES. I could be talking to the press about the practice run I had just completed, then blurt out that “I was shit on the straights, but I’ll figure it out by tomorrow, or you might see me dusting my replacements garage by the next race. There’s also the fact that I’m just confused a lot. I have trouble hearing and comprehending shit. I’ll be on the radio with my engineer and she’ll have to repeat herself or move the mic away from her face or something until I get it. That can get highlighted during boring races at times. Not to mention whenever press asks me a question in the noisy media pen, there’s numerous times I’ll just stare at them like there’s no one home up in there. But I guess those things can be endearing once you’re known for it.

© rrezshifts last updated. 04/12/2025