#intriguing heist theory

[usmsgutterson]

Cal, my love, how are you???

If heard your call for Kaz x Reader requests. If LOVE to see what you come up with for Kaz x Grisha!Reader (I'm feeling inferno, squaller, or Durant, but obviously it's up to you!) where the reader gets sicker and sicker from not using their small science! It's such a fascinating concept to me and hardly ever explored!

Back To Normal- K.B x gn! Squaller! Reader

Okay, hi! It's been nearly two weeks since you sent this in and I did write it! Editing it just took me longer than I expected and I woke up after a nap last night to discover that I have a bit of a cold developing so I couldn't edit the remainder of it and post it like I'd hoped, but I got it done today so yay, I hope you like this one!

This concept is one I've never seen a fic for but one I've debated writing a fic around in the past because the concept in and of itself is a really intriguing idea to me, and this gives me an excuse to write it and also an excuse to write a squaller! reader, which I've thought about doing but have never actually done, so I was really excited when I saw this in my inbox! Thank you so much for sending this in, and if it's not exactly what you had in mind, feel free to reach out and let me know, I'll totally rewrite if you'd like lol.

Fic type- hurt/comfort with moments of angst

Warnings- mentions of sickness, frailness, feelings of weakness, heart palpitations, loss of appetite, and there's reference to the second chapter of Six of Crows so slight spoiler warning too for people haven't read the books

As a Grisha, once your abilities to summon the small science were discovered, there were consequences for not summoning. You grew sick, your body grew weak, your bones fragile and you felt frail, even the smallest actions leaving you winded.

It was the universes way of punishing you for not using the gift you'd been given, another show of like calls to like. Refraining from summoning calls to sickness, and summoning calls to health.

You'd read Grisha theory, both in your time at the Little Palace before you left in the last few months before the war and in the time since, in the times wherein you needed something to read and happened upon a book containing Grisha theory and figured it would be good to pass the time.

You knew that you wouldn't last if you didn't summon, but you eventually stopped finding reason to. Nobody in the Dregs knew you were a squaller, and what good did wind do, anyway, unless it was summer and grossly humid as Ketterdam always got when the weather warmed up? You saw no point in using your small science, so eventually, you just stopped.

For a while, the differences weren't really noticeable. You didn't notice them, nobody in the Dregs noticed them, none of the crows did. You hadn't relied on your abilities as a Squaller since you'd lived in Ravka, and before you'd decided to stop, you mostly used them in summer or when Kaz needed a distraction in the middle of a negotiation in the rarer times they'd taken place outdoors, something to put the opposition a little on edge.

But then, they became noticeable. You stopped sleeping quite as comfortably as you used to, spending hours trying to get comfortable, trying to will your mind to quiet. You woke up and took to coffee to keep you awake, often running on between two and four hours to boot.

Because of your tiredness, dark circles developed under your eyes. Your appetite lessened and you grew to be tired all the time, even on a rarer night where your body rested for seven or eight hours. You still relied on the coffee even then, and Nina was beginning to take notice of the fact that you hardly ate.

Kaz had long taken notice of the exhaustion you exhibited even after jobs that you'd always considered pretty easy, ones that didn't require as much effort, as much physical strain, as the bigger heists always tended to.

Jesper had long taken notice of how much coffee you drank, the fact that you always seemed to have jurda on you even in the middle of the day, and Inej noticed it when your pace began to slow, afraid to walk at the pace you normally did because you didn't want to risk heart palpitations.

Wylan was beginning to notice when those heart palpitations kicked in, was the one to grab your hand and look at you, brown eyes silently trying to ask if something was wrong only to receive nothing in response.

One by one, each of the crows noticed something, and still, none of them said a word. They could've been wrong, they knew. All of them acknowledged that they could've been dramatizing things, making things out to be worse than they actually were.

The only one who was sure of the things they'd noticed was Kaz. You were someone who mattered to him. Of course he was going to notice if you were out of sorts. Observance was his pedigree.

So, one day, Kaz showed up at your door. "What's wrong?" He'd asked. "What is wrong with you, Y/N?"

You'd laughed, a lame, tired laugh. You'd barely slept three hours, and the long-term exhaustion was starting to finally have an impact. Kaz's tone was humorless, blunt like the edge of a knife gone too long without being run across a sharpening block.

It was normally gravel, normally coffee grounds being poured into a coffee press, but it was not that, not that day. It was the unsharpened edge of a knife, the voice that did not belong to the man you loved but rather to one they called Dirtyhands.

"What's wrong with me?" You asked. "Nothing, Kaz. Nothing is wrong with me."

"Exhaustion," Kaz said. "You drink coffee and chew jurda near constantly. You sleep hours after jobs that aren't even tiring. You are constantly tired because you can't sleep unless you are at the point wherein your body will die without resting. You get two hours most nights, four, six, on luckier ones. Nina has also noticed that you eat less lately. Wylan says you've been having heart palpitations and Matthias has noticed you zoning out. Why?"

"Why do I feel like that's a rhetorical question?"

"It's not. Stop trying to flirt."

"I'm not trying to flirt," you laughed again, a shallow, hollowed out version of the laugh Kaz recognized. "If I were trying to flirt, you'd know. I would know it was working because your cheeks would be tinged pink, which, of course, is something you'd deny."

Kaz laughed humorlessly once more. "What, are you sick?"

You paused. Some part of you had known he'd guess at that. With that realization came the one that he already knew why you were sick. Inej must've known, must've snooped for Kaz when the trust you shared was still developing. He was Kaz Brekker, and he had to know somehow, didn't he?

"You're a Squaller," he said, the words falling from his lips like they were something he'd forgotten, like the fact that you could summon the wind was something he'd merely heard and disregarded after having deemed it unimportant. "You're a Squaller, and you're one who hasn't summoned for at least six months. Why not?"

"I saw no point," you said. "Let me guess, though, you've known since I came in, since I joined up?"

"I've known since the night we confronted Bolliger about double dealing," Kaz said. "Geels, the negotiations. It was the day before--"

"The day before you came to me with the Ice Court proposition," you said with a nod. "I remember. What tipped you off?"

"The breeze," Kaz said. "It was late winter, and breezes like that are commonplace, sure, but after a bout of rain? Wind like that doesn't just happen. Especially not considering the fact that it nearly tipped Geels over, and Geels was nearly seven feet tall. It gave me something to use in the moment, and I just kind of noticed whenever you'd do it while I was falling short from then on. Nobody else knows."

"Well you'll need to grant me some leniency, Brekker. I stopped summoning because I didn't see a point."

"if the point of summoning is to keep you alive and healthy, I have to say, I see no sensible reason that one would stop," Kaz said. "You're deteriorating. I know you think it can't get any worse, but it can, and it will."

"I know," you said. "Relax. Let me find the proper time, when it doesn't feel like it'll be an inconvenience, and I'll give it a go."

Kaz looked at you solemnly for a minute before he nodded.

"Right, then," he said. "Work needs doing." He turned to go, and you watched him leave, not saying a word as he left, only closing your eyes and hoping for even another few moments of rest.

-

The next time you summoned, it was June and you hadn't summoned in a year. You were sitting in Kaz's office, the window open as you discussed heist plans with him, Jesper, Inej, and the rest of the crows.

The heat was growing unbearable, so you willed a strong breeze to flow gently through the room, making the area feel a bit colder, much to everyones delight. Kaz shot you a look because Ketterdam in the summer was not prone to breezes on humid days like that one, and you felt some of the energy that was long gone move back into your system, a spark of joy and pride at your small science lighting up in your chest.

You allowed yourself a small smile as you leaned back in the chair you'd occupied.

You were still sick, still frail and tired and coffee-reliant, but you were getting back to normal. You decided, in the moment, that that was what mattered.

[ramenwithbroccoli]

Hey I know nothing about steam powered giraffe but ur mechs Ben diagram post intrigued me, could u explain it pls?

GENERAL INTRODUCTION

Steam Powered Giraffe is a wonderful musical act with elements of comedy, pantomime and puppetry (shout out to GG the Giraffe).

Created in 1896 by Peter A. Walter I, the band consists of The Spine (David Michael Bennet), Rabbit (Isabella "Bunny" Bennet) and Zer0 (Bryan Barbarin).

Former members are Upgrade (Erin Burke) [from 2008 to 2011], The Jon (Jonathan Sprague) [from 2008 to 2012] and Hatchworth (Sam Luke) [from 2011 to 2016, although he 'became' a robot only after The Jon's departure].

RELEASED ALBUMS

please note that spg's style varies from album to album and sometimes even from song to song, so every new tune is a new adventure ;]

Album One - the first one, most old-timey in vibe. with that one song you might have heard. there's also a 2011 version of it without upgrade, but with Ice-Cream Man

The 2¢ Show - second album filled with train trips, cowboys, airplanes and this other song you might have heard (insect edition)

MK III - third album, with songs letting us know more about robots themselves (my personal favourite)

The Vice Quadrant part 1 and part 2 - fourth album, 2h space opera and a masterpiece, happening in two parallel universes. even most devoted fans have to check out the timeline sometimes to remember what's going on

Quintessential - fifth album with individual songs and the dnd anthem ever

1896 - sixth (and the newest!) album with absolute bops and foreshadowing for the new album. also, a song about a band sang by a band of people playing the robot band. bandception.

The Seventh - an upcoming album. all we have now is this trailer.

Bonus music

Music from SteamWorld Heist - new space-pirate themed songs and covers of older, popular tunes made for the SteamWorld Heist game. definitely deserves more recognition

covers and stand-alone songs not included on any of the albums

STUFF WORTH CHECKING OUT IF YOU WANT TO KNOW MORE

general info about the band/members

lore about creation of the band + timelines of both their fourth album "the vice quadrant" and the band itself

spg comics (now also on webtoon!)

@owlhari's youtube channel, with really fun early-performance compilations and more recent videos discussing lore, theories and the band itself

obviously the youtube channel of the band itself (if you dig around a bit you can find some pretty cool videos, such as these ones)

not to self-advertise, but spg community on tumblr is pretty neat. i've met wonderful people there and also found out that colonel walter ate dog food, so it's worth it to visit our tag sometime, i guess ;3

[karmathenightowl]

TAZ STEEPLECHASE EP 41 SPOILERS and Possibly What Ifs Discussion

Damn, okay there's a lot to unpack here

So my "Montrose Pretty is Devon Denton" theory is incorrect

BUT with the reveal of Montrose being Eggard Denton (Kenchall's dad), not only does everything click based on information brought to us in previous episodes but it also paints a rather heartbreaking implication of his role in the Denton family and Steeplechase as a whole.

Now it all makes sense that Montrose is a Denton for his knowledge about theme park attractions. From the lore of Ephemera (even his excitement and passion for it) to the existence of Jungle Island. There's also the moment he says "Sorry, Carmine" during the finale of the Gallspire heist when dressed up as Jessie the Infinite Spectre Fairy.

Now here's where things get very interesting.

I don't know if I'd call this entire next section a theory but mostly samples of What Ifs I have in my head. Hear me out:

Let's start with Kenchall. Back in Ep. 17 when he requests Poppy's Angels to steal the Gallspire, he notes that:

"If he (Eggard) had been born— if he had muscled his way up there, I’d be running the company right now. But instead, Carmine’s stupid monarchy passes from first born to first born. So, now next in line after Evelyn is her shithead son, Devon.

Then there's his brief conversation with Orwell and upon being asked what his childhood was like, Montrose responds:

"It was...quite lonely."

Then the theme from The Future is You plays in the background.

In the now debunked theory I made a while ago about Montrose being Devon Denton, someone replied the possibility of Eggard having a rough childhood because of living under Evelyn's shadow due to the fact that she was the next successor of Steeplechase. This neglect is what probably prompted Eggard to run away from home, probably fake his death since Kenchall stated that Eggard died "10 ish years ago" and start a whole new life as Montrose Pretty.

But despite that, it seems like he still yearns for that familial connection, bonding he never got with his real family. So why not try to make some connections with a new family, i.e the family from The Future is You.

There's also Episode 40, in which Montrose faces Carmine with his mask off.

Carmine says "I have to ask…do I know you?" and lights from inside the rocket point at Montrose.

Montrose replies with "Hello Carmine. I have decided to wear my true face for this special occasion."

I'm intrigued with how Episode 42 will play out with Carmine's realization of Eggard, if there will be any at all.

I want to cut back to Kenchall for a bit and preface this theory with a smaller one that may be a FAR stretch but I can explain.

We know Kenchall is far from being a good person. What if he had high expectations from Eggard, wanting the role of future park successor next in line so badly even though he knows that his father can't obtain that and pass that on to his son.

But also, what if Kenchall didn't care.

This is going to sound nuts, but if this is true, I see Kenchall as sort of a Veruca Salt type of person. This idea of Kenchall probably being a spoiled brat and having a father wanting what's best for his son and loving him despite this. Being in the Denton family known for their theme parks and innovative talents within the Dentonic Corporation, seems likely that Kenchall would be the sort of pampered kid that could get whatever he wanted. But all that doesn't matter. He clearly wants to take over the park, as stated in episode 17. Justin stated that Kenchall was seen as the black sheep of the family, but what if that was a lie? What if Kenchall made that up so others could see him as an outcast of the family when in actuality it was his father who was the real outcast.

What if Kenchall has a one sided resentment towards Eggard for something that wasn't even in his control i.e becoming successor to Steeplechase due to him being born mere minutes after Evelyn.

Then we come to today's episode at the end, with Montrose (now with his mask off) going to Kenchall at his APC. He says, "Its been ten years. We have a lot to catch up on."

Kenchall doesn't recognize him, saying "I don't know you."

Montrose retorts that he does, and says this:

"I have a lot of explaining to do, but I know you of all people will understand the great lengths I have gone to try and cease control of this park, this corporation, that I missed out on by mere minutes. I need the time to explain this to you Kenchall. Do you understand?"

In raising him, what if it made Eggard heartbroken to see Kenchall unhappy. In wanting to please him, Eggard decides to find his own way in obtaining control of the park to pass down to his son. And the implication that Montrose/Eggard has done all of these heist jobs for the possibility of pleasing his son makes this sound very sad in the grand scheme of things. He even risked his life multiple times, from eating a pin, to having his hand be fused with two elephant tusks.

But from what Kenchall has done to him, Beef, Emerich, and countless others, this perception may change. Maybe Eggard wants control of the park but doesn't want his biological son involved in it. I mean, he did adopt Todzilla after all...

[the-colourful-witch]

Can you talk more about Regulus being half laid-back and sloppy? 👀 That's an intriguing headcanon, I usually see people characterise him as the toffest toff haha

REGULUS BLACK, a mess A very short essay by Me :)

Now, I haven't read a lot of Regulus fics. I read Art Heist, baby! and Crimson Rivers (an ongoing process, no spoilers, please), but that's pretty much it. Put those versions of Regulus together with the canon version in the books and something interesting happens. Regulus Black is admired by his peers, revered, almost. He's good at his classes, a great Quidditch player, and holds the title of Heir to House Black. So, he looks confident, not exactly arrogant, but he knows he's good. He knows he's talented. He knows what people think of him. And here's where my theory comes in. I think, inside, he's holding on for dear life. He works himself to the bone keeping up with expectations. He studies throughout the night and gets up early to run around the grounds to keep up his cardio. He reads extracurricular books to know more than anyone else. He studies French and speaks it fluently, but still practices when it's just him alone. All because he has to. He's scared that people find out the truth; that he's nothing special. That he's just a person who works hard. So when people whisper around him, and throw him jealous, admiring, curious looks, he doesn't bother to pay attention. He leans back, smiles, and rolls up his sleeves, playing into the fantasy. That's where the laid-back version of Regulus comes in. The sloppy part is his humanity. He stayed up all night to work on an essay, then read two chapters on the French Revolution, in French. He slept a few minutes too long and when he got up, he forgot to comb his hair or tuck in his shirt. It looks casual like he doesn't really care. However, he cares too much, and sometimes those little things slip away from him. Because his brain is already three steps ahead. Now, why would he put all that pressure on himself?? We all know the answer: family. His parents let go of Sirius and focussed all of their efforts on Regulus. To make sure he would become the person they wanted them to be: the Black Heir. And Regulus is human. He wants their love and craves it. He works hard to prove he can do it. Mostly, he's scared he'll end up like Sirius, whom people whisper about behind his back. His peers in Slytherin curse his brother's name. Regulus loves Sirius but fears the opinions of others more. He knows the violence that lurks behind sharp words. He's seen it and felt it first-hand. And with Sirius gone, there's no one to protect him but himself. In short, I think Regulus is a walking contradiction of himself. He cares but doesn't show it. He's relaxed, yet always stressed. He is proud of his achievements but feels like he's always coming up short for his parents. Who wouldn't go mad if you felt all that? I know I would. Remember, this is my opinion, my views on Regulus. Anyone is entitled to their own thoughts and opinions.

[lillywillow]

Heart Heist

Summary: With a string of recent thefts by a figure the media has dubbed The Spectre, your father puts you in charge of finding security for the party he’s hosting to show off a priceless piece of jewellery. Little does he realise how close he is to the thief…

 Written for: @the-slumberparty‘s Week One: I Spy Challenge

 Words: 1801

 Prompt: A diamond necklace

 Pairing: Billy Russo x Female Reader  

 Warnings: Some action, minor injuries, flirting

Additional Tags: @budugu​ @dreamlandcreations​

 It was the dead of the night when a lone guard was conducting his patrol. A collection of rare Wakandan artefacts was on display at a local art gallery, on loan from a private collector. The guard was walking past the room when he noticed one of the most expensive pieces was missing. He did a double take and ran in but no one was there. The guard called for backup, catching a glimpse of a swish of fabric vanishing around the corner. He gave chase after them, shouting at them to halt. The figure ran towards dead-end with an open window, waiting for the guard to get closer.

 “Nowhere to run now, dirtbag,” he jeered.

 The masked figure saluted and jumped out the window. The guard ran over but the thief had vanished into the night.

…

 The theft of the Wakandan artefact was just another in a string by a thief the media had dubbed The Spectre because they left no trace of evidence behind. It had been months since this case captured the public’s imagination, stirring theories and taunting police. The Spectre had been targeting unique heirlooms of the wealthy. Knowing all this, your father still decided it would be a wise idea to host a party with one of his recently acquired purchases on display. He asked you to hire security for the occasion. That was how you ended up at Anvil Security.

 With a sigh, you entered the building and was soon directed to where you could make your inquiry. That’s where you first met him.

 “Nice to officially meet you, Miss L/N,” the man with dark, brooding eyes smiled, getting up from his desk to shake your hand and close the door.

 “Have we met before?” you asked.

 “I like to make it my business to investigate potential clients,” he explained, offering you a seat. “My name is Billy Russo. Now, what can I do for you?”

 “My father would like to hire your services for a party he’s throwing,” you sighed.

 “I take it you’re not on board with the idea…”

 “It’s nothing against you. It’s just… my father did not make his money from being stupid. He made his money from other people being stupid…”

 Billy quirked an eyebrow at your comment but said nothing. You cleared your throat and continued speaking.

 “Anyway, my father recently bought a historical diamond necklace from a museum and wants to show it off…”

 “Really? Even with this Spectre guy running around?” he asked.

 “I’ve voiced my concerns to him but he seems to think he’s above such petty theft…”

 “And what do you think?”

 “I think he’s being arrogant and the Spectre will come regardless of the security he has…”

 “You seem pretty confident,” Billy stated.

 “I’ve been following the case,” you shrugged.

 “I see…”

 “What? It’s a pretty interesting case. Drama, mystery, intrigue… all that’s missing is betrayal, and revenge…”

 “You don’t say,” Billy chuckled.

 “We’re getting off track here,” you stated, steering the conversation back to the task you came here for.

 After you had negotiated a price and date, you headed off. You were unable to stop thinking about Billy.

…

 Soon, the night of the party arrived. People were in awe of the diamond necklace that sparkled so perfectly under its showcase lighting. Each gemstone refracted a small rainbow which reflected against the glass it was trapped behind.

 You were standing in front of the case when you heard a voice speak behind you.

 “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

 You turned to see Billy standing there.

 “It is… Did you know that Napoleon Bonaparte had this piece made to celebrate his marriage to his second wife?”

 “Is that so?” Billy hummed.

 “This, and a diadem. They’re sisters. They should be together…”

 You noticed the way Billy was staring you and forced yourself to relax your tense stance.

 “May I have this dance?” he asked, extending his hand to you as a waltz began to play.

 The request caught you off guard but you accepted the offer. Billy guided you to the floor, gracefully moving with you to the music. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy being in such close proximity to him but it caused a major hitch in your plans.

 “You seem nervous,” he purred in your ear.

 “I’m not nervous,” you tried to assure him.

 “You keep looking around as if searching for someone… your heart rate has gone up…”

 Billy pulled you closer, keeping his thumb on the pulse point on your wrist.

 “Maybe you’re the reason for my fast pulse… you are rather handsome Mr. Russo and my father can be quite protective of me…”

 “It’s a possibility…”

 Billy spun you around so his arms were around you, caging you close to his body and his lips by your ear.

 “I think another possibility is that you’re in league with The Spectre,” he whispered.

 You tried to keep your voice even as you replied.

 “Whatever gives you that idea?”

 “Your line of questioning these last few weeks… Asking about how many staff we’re using, their positions…”

 “Maybe I want to know if you’re qualified for the job,” you shrugged, spinning yourself out of his arms.

 Billy caught your hand.

 “Again, plausible. There’s also your interest in The Spectre case… everything I’ve read about it indicates an inside job…”

 “Do you have anything that connects me to those thefts?”

 “Not yet…”

 “Then where’s the issue?”

 Before Billy could respond, the lights went out. People started panicking but it was short lived as the lights soon came back on. You and Billy stared at each other, as if locked in some silent dare.

 “I do hope you enjoy the rest of the party, Mr. Russo… and thank you for the dance,” you smiled, taking your leave.

 You could feel Billy’s eyes on you as you walked away. He was going to be problematic.

…

 Long after the party was over, you put your plans into action. Having memorised the guard rotation and tricked the cameras, you slipped into the room and silently taking the diamond necklace out of its case. You were about to make your grand escape when a guard walked in, sooner than you were expecting. Thinking back on your earlier conversation, you realised that Russo must have changed the timing to draw you out. Cursing to yourself, you ran out the back way as you were left with no other options. These people were highly trained and heavily armed professionals. They weren’t going to fall for the same cheap parlour tricks any of the other rubes fell for. Running as fast as you could, you made your way out of there.

 “Hold it!” a voice shouted.

 You ran faster as the guard started firing his gun, wincing as a bullet grazed your arm. Around the corner you ran to where you knew there would be a window you could climb through… only to run into Billy Russo himself. There was nowhere left to go.

 “Don’t even think about it,” he warned.

 You slowly raised your hands as the security force caught up.

 “Just surrender now, and nobody has to get hurt…”

 Your mind was racing. This couldn’t be how it ended. You couldn’t be caught like this. There was no way you could fight them. They were far more experienced in combat than you would ever be.

 Suddenly, you threw the necklace up into the air. Billy made a grab for it and that was when you set off a smoke bomb. The two men coughed and tried to clear the air, giving you a chance to get away. If you could make it to your room, you would be home free. You ran, dodging the guards until you finally made it to your room, hoping you didn’t leave a trail of blood from your wound. As you leant against your door, you felt a sense of relief and… exhilaration. You were right about Billy. He did complicate things… but he also made them that much more fun.

…

 The next day, you went to Anvil to pay for their services, being sure to keep your injury covered. Surprisingly, there was no news of your exploits of the previous night. Your father had slept through the whole thing, everything had been cleaned up and the Marie-Louise necklace had been put back in its case. You made pleasant conversation with Billy until your phone rang. Excusing yourself, you stepped out of the room to take it.

 “We have the shipment ready to go,” the person on the other end of the line informed you.

 “Excellent. How soon can you get it out of the country?”

 “It’ll be gone by tonight.”

 “Good. Keep me posted.”

 You turned to see Billy standing right behind you. He grabbed your arm around the spot you had been shot, causing you to cry out in pain.

 “Thought so…”

 “What are you going to do about it?”

 You were a little scared. This was as close as you had ever come to being exposed.

 “Nothing… yet. I’m only going to warn you once. From now on, you are to stay out of Anvil business.”

 You raised an eyebrow. Billy could easily go to the police with the information he had. Why was he letting you go?

 “I will ask this… why go through all the dramatics? You could easily buy all those things…”

 “I could… but where’s the fun in that?”

 Billy once again encouraged you to sit down and shut his office door for privacy.

 “I guess I got a little bored with the rich heiress lifestyle. The same people, the same dull conversations… besides, I’m working to get all the tings I stole back to their country of origin…”

 Billy smiled a little.

 “You’re an interesting woman, Y/N…”

 “You’re an interesting man, Mr. Russo,” you retorted.

 “Please, call me Billy,” he smiled.

 “Could I take you to lunch sometime, Billy? I really owe you for covering me with everything that happened…”

 “How about dinner tonight?” he asked.

 “I’ll see you at seven,” you smiled.

 “I’ll pick you up,” he smiled back.

 As you walked out, you felt a swarm of butterflies in your stomach. Dating the man who was onto your little game could be a lot of fun. How long could you keep on playing?

[thehylianbatman]

The Missing Episodes of Star Wars: The Clone Wars

This post has nothing to do with Disney or their movies.

Hello. Star Wars is extremely close to my heart, and extremely important to me. As a narrative and a creative work, I believe Star Wars is unique and distinctive. I believe that Star Wars is now in an unfinished state, and will more than likely remain so forever, but my anti-Disney tirades can go in another post. For now, I simply want to inform you about Star Wars: The Clone Wars, and share my theory that there are episodes of Star Wars: The Clone Wars being hidden from us.

All information in this post is publicly and freely available from Wikipedia.

Here is a list of every episode of Star Wars: The Clone Wars released before production was cancelled by Disney in 2014, along with seasonal notes.

SEASON 1 (2008) - This season contains 6 standalone episodes, 5 arcs of 2 episodes, and 2 arcs of 3 episodes, covering episodes 1 through 22 of the series. The seasons opens and closes on standalone episodes. As the first season of the series, these formats are all appearing for the first time.

"Ambush" (1.08)

"Rising Malevolence" (1.07)

"Shadow of Malevolence" (1.09)

"Destroy Malevolence" (1.11)

"Rookies" (1.14)

"Downfall of a Droid" (1.02)

"Duel of the Droids" (1.06)

"Bombad Jedi" (1.05)

"Cloak of Darkness" (1.10)

"Lair of Grievous" (1.12)

"Dooku Captured" (1.16)

"The Gungan General" (1.20)

"Jedi Crash" (1.22)

"Defenders of Peace" (1.24)

"Trespass" (1.25)

"The Hidden Enemy" (2.01)

"Blue Shadow Virus" (1.26)

"Mystery of a Thousand Moons" (2.02)

"Storm Over Ryloth" (1.15)

"Innocents of Ryloth" (1.17)

"Liberty on Ryloth" (1.19)

"Hostage Crisis" (2.04)

SEASON 2: Rise of the Bounty Hunters (2009) - This season contains 4 standalone episodes, 2 arcs of 2 episodes, 3 arcs of 3 episodes, and 1 arc of 5 episodes, "Senate Spy" to "Brain Invaders"; this covers episodes 23 through 44 of the series. The seasons opens and closes on 3-episode arcs. The 5-episode arc is appearing for the first and only time.

"Holocron Heist" (1.23)

"Cargo of Doom" (1.13)

"Children of the Force" (2.03)

"Senate Spy" (2.05)

"Landing at Point Rain" (2.07)

"Weapons Factory" (2.08)

"Legacy of Terror" (2.09)

"Brain Invaders" (2.12)

"Grievous Intrigue" (2.14)

"The Deserter" (2.06)

"Lightsaber Lost" (2.11)

"The Mandalore Plot" (2.13)

"Voyage of Temptation" (1.21)

"Duchess of Mandalore" (2.16)

"Senate Murders" (2.10)

"Cat and Mouse" (2.17)

"Bounty Hunters" (2.19)

"The Zillo Beast" (2.22)

"The Zillo Beast Strikes Back" (2.23)

"Death Trap" (2.15)

"R2 Come Home" (2.18)

"Lethal Trackdown" (2.20)

SEASON 3: Secrets Revealed (2010) - This season contains 3 standalone episodes, 5 arcs of 2 episodes, and 3 arcs of 3 episodes, covering episodes 45 through 66 of the series. The season opens and closes on 2-episode arcs.

"Clone Cadets" (3.01)

"ARC Troopers" (3.02)

"Supply Lines" (2.24)

"Sphere of Influence" (2.25)

"Corruption" (3.04)

"The Academy" (2.26)

"Assassin" (2.21)

"Evil Plans" (3.03)

"Hunt for Ziro" (3.05)

"Heroes on Both Sides" (3.06)

"Pursuit of Peace" (3.07)

"Nightsisters" (3.08)

"Monster" (3.10)

"Witches of the Mist" (3.12)

"Overlords" (3.09)

"Altar of Mortis" (3.11)

"Ghosts of Mortis" (3.13)

"The Citadel" (3.14)

"Counter Attack" (3.15)

"Citadel Rescue" (3.17)

"Padawan Lost" (3.16)

"Wookie Hunt" (3.18)

SEASON 4: Battle Lines (2011) - This season contains 1 standalone episode, "A Friend in Need", 1 arc of 2 episodes, "Mercy Mission" and "Nomad Droids", 1 arc of 3 episodes, "Kidnapped" through "Escape from Kadavo", and 4 arcs of 4 episodes, covering episodes 67 through 88 of the series. The season opens and closes on 4-episode arcs. The 4-episode arc is appearing for the first time.

"Water War" (3.22)

"Gungan Attack" (3.23)

"Prisoners" (3.24)

"Shadow Warrior" (3.19)

"Mercy Mission" (3.20)

"Nomad Droids" (3.21)

"Darkness on Umbara" (3.25)

"The General" (3.26)

"Plan of Dissent" (4.01)

"Carnage of Krell" (4.02)

"Kidnapped" (4.03)

"Slaves of the Republic" (4.04)

"Escape from Kadavo" (4.05)

"A Friend in Need" (4.06)

"Deception" (4.07)

"Friends and Enemies" (4.08)

"The Box" (4.09)

"Crisis on Naboo" (4.10)

"Massacre" (4.11)

"Bounty" (4.12)

"Brothers" (4.13)

"Revenge" (4.14)

SEASON 5 (2012) - This season contains 1 standalone episode, "Revival", 1 arc of 3 episodes, "Eminence" through "The Lawless", and 4 arcs of 4 episodes, covering episodes 89 through 108 of the series. The season opens on a standalone episode and closes on a 4-episode arc. This is the first season since Season 1 to open on a standalone episode, and the first season to open and close with episodes/arcs of different lengths, as well as the first season to have fewer than 22 episodes; it contains only 20 episodes.

"Revival" (4.26)

"A War on Two Fronts" (4.15)

"Front Runners" (4.16)

"The Soft War" (4.17)

"Tipping Points" (4.18)

"The Gathering" (4.22)

"A Test of Strength" (4.23)

"Bound for Rescue" (4.24)

"A Necessary Bond" (4.25)

"Secret Weapons" (5.04)

"A Summer Day in the Void" (5.05)

"Missing in Action" (5.06)

"Point of No Return" (5.07)

"Eminence" (5.01)

"Shades of Reason" (5.02)

"The Lawless" (5.03)

"Sabotage" (5.08)

"The Jedi Who Knew Too Much" (5.09)

"To Catch a Jedi" (5.10)

"The Wrong Jedi" (5.11)

SEASON 6: The Lost Missions (2014) - This season contains 1 arc of 2 episodes, "The Disappeared, Part I" and "The Disappeared, Part II", 1 arc of 3 episodes, "An Old Friend" through "Crisis at the Heart", and 2 arcs of 4 episodes, covering episodes 109 through 121 of the series. This is the first season to contain no standalone episodes.

"The Unknown" (5.12)

"Conspiracy" (5.13)

"Fugitive" (5.14)

"Orders" (5.15)

"An Old Friend" (4.19)

"The Rise of Clovis" (4.20)

"Crisis at the Heart" (4.21)

"The Disappeared, Part I" (5.16)

"The Disappeared, Part II" (5.17)

"The Lost One" (5.18)

"Voices" (5.19)

"Destiny" (5.20)

"Sacrifice" (5.21)

The series had 5 seasons conventionally constructed, intentionally sequenced and released weekly on television, and 1 season released in bulk on a streaming service, Netflix. Altogether, this covers 121 episodes of the series released before Disney's interference.

However, this is not all of the information we have. You'll notice that, next to every single episode title, there is a sequence of two numbers. This sequence is that episode's production code; the first digit is the production block, while the next two digits are the episode's particular order within the production block. This information is more pertinent for a look at the series from a production standpoint, so here is that information put together:

BLOCK 1 - This block contains episodes from Seasons 1 and 2.

1.02 - "Downfall of a Droid" (S1E6) 1.05 - "Bombad Jedi" (S1E8) 1.06 - "Duel of the Droids" (S1E7) 1.07 - "Rising Malevolence" (S1E2) 1.08 - "Ambush" (S1E1) 1.09 - "Shadow of Malevolence" (S1E3) 1.10 - "Cloak of Darkness" (S1E9) 1.11 - "Destroy Malevolence" (S1E4) 1.12 - "Lair of Grievous" (S1E10) 1.13 - "Cargo of Doom" (S2E2) 1.14 - "Rookies" (S1E5) 1.15 - "Storm Over Ryloth" (S1E19) 1.16 - "Dooku Captured" (S1E11) 1.17 - "Innocents of Ryloth" (S1E20) 1.19 - "Liberty on Ryloth" (S1E21) 1.20 - "The Gungan General" (S1E12) 1.21 - "Voyage of Temptation" (S2E13) 1.22 - "Jedi Crash" (S1E13) 1.23 - "Holocron Heist" (S2E1) 1.24 - "Defenders of Peace" (S1E14) 1.25 - "Trespass" (S1E15) 1.26 - "Blue Shadow Virus" (S1E17)

BLOCK 2 - This block contains episodes from Seasons 1, 2, and 3, tied with Block 4 for the most seasons within a single block.

2.01 - "The Hidden Enemy" (S1E16) 2.02 - "Mystery of a Thousand Moons" (S1E18) 2.03 - "Children of the Force" (S2E3) 2.04 - "Hostage Crisis" (S1E22) 2.05 - "Senate Spy" (S2E4) 2.06 - "The Deserter" (S2E10) 2.07 - "Landing at Point Rain" (S2E5) 2.08 - "Weapons Factory" (S2E6) 2.09 - "Legacy of Terror" (S2E7) 2.10 - "Senate Murders" (S2E15) 2.11 - "Lightsaber Lost" (S2E11) 2.12 - "Brain Invaders" (S2E8) 2.13 - "The Mandalore Plot" (S2E12) 2.14 - "Grievous Intrigue" (S2E9) 2.15 - "Death Trap" (S2E20) 2.16 - "Duchess of Mandalore" (S2E14) 2.17 - "Cat and Mouse" (S2E16) 2.18 - "R2 Come Home" (S2E21) 2.19 - "Bounty Hunters" (S2E17) 2.20 - "Lethal Trackdown" (S2E22) 2.21 - "Assassin" (S3E7) 2.22 - "The Zillo Beast" (S2E18) 2.23 - "The Zillo Beast Strikes Back" (S2E19) 2.24 - "Supply Lines" (S3E3) 2.25 - "Sphere of Influence" (S3E4) 2.26 - "The Academy" (S3E6)

BLOCK 3 - This block contains episodes from Seasons 3 and 4.

3.01 - "Clone Cadets" (S3E1) 3.02 - "ARC Troopers" (S3E2) 3.03 - "Evil Plans" (S3E8) 3.04 - "Corruption" (S3E5) 3.05 - "Hunt for Ziro" (S3E9) 3.06 - "Heroes on Both Sides" (S3E10) 3.07 - "Pursuit of Peace" (S3E11) 3.08 - "Nightsisters" (S3E12) 3.09 - "Overlords" (S3E15) 3.10 - "Monster" (S3E13) 3.11 - "Altar of Mortis" (S3E16) 3.12 - "Witches of the Mist" (S3E14) 3.13 - "Ghosts of Mortis" (S3E17) 3.14 - "The Citadel" (S3E18) 3.15 - "Counter Attack" (S3E19) 3.16 - "Padawan Lost" (S3E21) 3.17 - "Citadel Rescue" (S3E20) 3.18 - "Wookiee Hunt" (S3E22) 3.19 - "Shadow Warrior" (S4E4) 3.20 - "Mercy Mission" (S4E5) 3.21 - "Nomad Droids" (S4E6) 3.22 - "Water War" (S4E1) 3.23 - "Gungan Attack" (S4E2) 3.24 - "Prisoners" (S4E3) 3.25 - "Darkness on Umbara" (S4E7) 3.26 - "The General" (S4E8)

BLOCK 4 - This block contains episodes from Seasons 4, 5, and 6, tied with Block 2 for the most seasons within a single block.

4.01 - "Plan of Dissent" (S4E9) 4.02 - "Carnage of Krell" (S4E10) 4.03 - "Kidnapped" (S4E11) 4.04 - "Slaves of the Republic" (S4E12) 4.05 - "Escape from Kadavo" (S4E13) 4.06 - "A Friend in Need" (S4E14) 4.07 - "Deception" (S4E15) 4.08 - "Friends and Enemies" (S4E16) 4.09 - "The Box" (S4E17) 4.10 - "Crisis on Naboo" (S4E18) 4.11 - "Massacre" (S4E19) 4.12 - "Bounty" (S4E20) 4.13 - "Brothers" (S4E21) 4.14 - "Revenge" (S4E22) 4.15 - "A War on Two Fronts" (S5E2) 4.16 - "Front Runners" (S5E3) 4.17 - "The Soft War" (S5E4) 4.18 - "Tipping Points" (S5E5) 4.19 - "An Old Friend" (S6E5) 4.20 - "The Rise of Clovis" (S6E6) 4.21 - "Crisis at the Heart" (S6E7) 4.22 - "The Gathering" (S5E6) 4.23 - "A Test of Strength" (S5E7) 4.24 - "Bound for Rescue" (S5E8) 4.25 - "A Necessary Bond" (S5E9) 4.26 - "Revival" (S5E1)

BLOCK 5 - This block contains episodes from Seasons 5 and 6.

5.01 - "Eminence" (S5E14) 5.02 - "Shades of Reason" (S5E15) 5.03 - "The Lawless" (S5E16) 5.04 - "Secret Weapons" (S5E10) 5.05 - "A Sunny Day in the Void" (S5E11) 5.06 - "Missing in Action" (S5E12) 5.07 - "Point of No Return" (S5E13) 5.08 - "Sabotage" (S5E17) 5.09 - "The Jedi Who Knew Too Much" (S5E18) 5.10 - "To Catch a Jedi" (S5E19) 5.11 - "The Wrong Jedi" (S5E20) 5.12 - "The Unknown" (S6E1) 5.13 - "Conspiracy" (S6E2) 5.14 - "Fugitive" (S6E3) 5.15 - "Orders" (S6E4) 5.16 - "The Disappeared, Part I" (S6E8) 5.17 - "The Disappeared, Part II" (S6E9) 5.18 - "The Lost One" (S6E10) 5.19 - "Voices" (S6E11) 5.20 - "Destiny" (S6E12) 5.21 - "Sacrifice" (S6E13)

Looking at this list, gaps are plainly evident. 1.01, 1.03, 1.04, and 1.18 are all missing, and Block 5 is 5 episodes shorter than the previous 4 blocks. Where are these episodes?

The missing episodes from Block 1 are easy; they were cannibalized and stitched together to make the Star Wars: The Clone Wars film. The film is 98 minutes long, while episodes of the series are typically around 22 minutes long; 22 minutes per episode times 4 episodes is 88 minutes total runtime, 10 minutes short of the film's runtime. Those 10 minutes are likely the credits and polishing for the film's theatrical release, if not simply the episodes themselves being slightly longer.

Therefore, we can add these to the list:

1.01 - The Clone Wars Film (FILM) 1.03 - The Clone Wars Film (FILM) 1.04 - The Clone Wars Film (FILM) 1.18 - The Clone Wars Film (FILM)

This resolves the issue of the missing episodes from Block 1, meaning that all of the episodes produced before 5.22 were released. This gives us a total of 125 episodes. But what about Episode 5.22 and the rest of Block 5?

This is where the trail gets murky. Fans of the series who were around when it was cancelled may recall The Clone Wars Legacy, the plan to release content from the series in different means in order to not waste the work that went into it. Some may think that this simplifies things. In fact, it does the opposite.

Here is a list of all the content from The Clone Wars Legacy:

Darth Maul: Son of Dathomir, a comic adapting a 4-episode arc covering Darth Maul's story after getting captured by Darth Sidious at the end of "The Lawless", released by Dark Horse Comics.

Dark Disciple, a novel adapting either an 8-episode arc or two related 4-episode arcs covering Asajj Ventress' story after her last appearance in "The Wrong Jedi".

Crystal Crisis on Utapau, a rough story reel of incomplete episodes of a 4-episode arc, covering the emotional fallout of Ahsoka's departure from the Jedi Order after the events of "The Wrong Jedi".

The Bad Batch, a rough story reel of incomplete episodes of a 4-episode arc, intending to work as a backdoor pilot of sorts to a spin-off series focusing on the titular Bad Batch.

Those keeping track of the numbers will quickly spot that we have the content of 20 episodes released as The Clone Wars Legacy. This does not easily fill in the gaps we have, nor does it finish things off neatly.

The production codes of the original episodes adapted into the material for The Clone Wars Legacy are known. The production codes of the in-production 20 episodes are listed below:

BLOCK 6 - This block has 16 known episodes.

6.01 - "A Death on Utapau" (REEL) 6.02 - "In Search of the Crystal" (REEL) 6.03 - "Crystal Crisis" (REEL) 6.04 - "The Big Bang" (REEL) 6.09 - "The Bad Batch" (REEL) 6.10 - "A Distant Echo" (REEL) 6.11 - "On the Wings of Keeradaks" (REEL) 6.12 - "Unfinished Business" (REEL) 6.13 - "Lethal Alliance" (BOOK) 6.14 - "The Mission" (BOOK) 6.15 - "Conspirators" (BOOK) 6.16 - "Dark Disciple" (BOOK) 6.21 - "The Enemy of My Enemy" (BOOK) 6.22 - "A Tale of Two Apprentices" (BOOK) 6.23 - "Proxy War" (BOOK) 6.24 - "Showdown on Dathomir" (BOOK)

BLOCK 7 - This block has 4 known episodes.

7.05 - "Saving Vos, Part I" (BOOK) 7.06 - "Saving Vos, Part II" (BOOK) 7.07 - "Traitor" (BOOK) 7.08 - "The Path" (BOOK)

While we can add these to the list of produced episodes of Star Wars: The Clone Wars, this raises more questions than answers. Not only was there a Block 6, but there was also a Block 7 as well. Block 7 is nearly entirely unknown, while Block 6 also has gaps, and, to top it all off, none of the things we gain from this are in Block 5, meaning those episodes are still unknown as well.

However, we do gain one answer from this: the production blocks got shorter. The last episode of Block 6 is 6.24, not 6.26 as one might expect from Blocks past. This makes Block 5's gap a little more clear-cut; it means we're only missing 5.22 through 5.24. That's 3 episodes, a common arc length. If Block 5 was as long as the other blocks, that would be 5 episodes missing, which could be either a 4-episode arc and a standalone episode, or a 2-episode arc and a 3-episode arc. All still common arc lengths, but not as clear-cut.

Of course, there's no definitive proof that the blocks got shorter. It's possible there'a 5.25 and 5.26 and a 6.25 and a 6.26. That would be a 2-episode arc missing from Block 6, as well.

The only "proof" I have seen stating that the blocks got shorter, besides the lack of trails for a theoretical 6.25 and 6.26 confirming that Block 6 remained the same length, and therefore Block 5 must have, as well, is a statement by Pablo Hidalgo on Twitter, stating that there is no 5.25 or 5.26. I do not know where he gets his information from, and his relationship with Lucasfilm is murky to me, so I'm hesitant to just accept it as fact. There's also the fact that he could be lying to cover Lucasfilm and/or Disney for the sake of money and employment.

This is not an allegation or a statement of belief, merely an acknowledgement of possibility.

However, the production blocks do seem to be 26 episodes long specifically just to cover the film initially, which leaves 22 episodes for the regular season; since Season 5 definitively got reduced by 2 episodes, it's entirely possible that the production blocks did also get reduced by 2 episodes, and the new season length merely reflects this.

All this does is muddy the waters, however. Without solid answers, we've got next to nothing to go on.

Except Disney.

Of course, Disney resurrected the rotting corpse of Star Wars: The Clone Wars to be completely sure that the money well within was completely dry, before discarding it and moving on to whatever live action thing they're working on now. These episodes do, however, give us some information. Listed below are the episodes Disney released:

BLOCK 6

6.05 - "Gone with a Trace" (DISNEY) 6.06 - "Deal No Deal" (DISNEY) 6.07 - "Dangerous Debt" (DISNEY) 6.08 - "Together Again" (DISNEY)

BLOCK 7 7.21 - "Old Friends Not Forgotten" (DISNEY) 7.22 - "The Phantom Apprentice" (DISNEY) 7.23 - "Shattered" (DISNEY) 7.24 - "Victory and Death" (DISNEY)

While these episodes have been "adapted" (read: scrubbed and censored) by Disney, the fact that they continue to use the original production codes leads me to believe that these episodes originated as original episodes of Star Wars: The Clone Wars. However, they've been written or additionally written by Dave Filoni, who, aside from assisting with one episode ("Lethal Trackdown", S2E22, 2.20), was not a writer on the series until after Disney bought the property; he was a director. This tells me that the direction he took the episodes in was not their originally intended direction, but rather, the Disney-approved direction given to him. This says, to me, that we cannot pull any information from these episodes besides possibly basic premises, as these are not the original episodes with renewed production, but new "adaptations" of what was being produced when the series was cancelled.

However, this does give us new information, in telling us that the final episodes of Block 7 were the finale of the series. This feels too large of a fact to be new or changed; I feel that, while the content and direction of 7.21 through 7.24 may have changed, them being the series finale is just too big of a basic premise to ignore or change. If it isn't, then why make those episodes the finale of the revived series? Why not 7.01 through 7.04, or invent new numbers in 6.25 through 6.28?

Therefore, going off that conclusion, we have a solid ending point: 7.24, the end of the final production block, Block 7.

This also supports the idea that the production blocks get shorter with Block 5, as, while 5.24 is not known, both 6.24 and 7.24 seem to be the end of their blocks.

Therefore, with all this information, I feel we can see a basic roadmap of where Star Wars: The Clone Wars was going to go, and what Disney took from us. Looking at a list of the production blocks:

Block 1: 26 episodes Block 2: 26 episodes Block 3: 26 episodes Block 4: 26 episodes Block 5: 24 episodes Block 6: 24 episodes Block 7: 24 episodes

If all information is correct, this means LucasFilm were planning on producing 176 episodes of the series. Looking at a list of the released episodes before the buyout:

Season 1: 22 episodes Season 2: 22 episodes Season 3: 22 episodes Season 4: 22 episodes Season 5: 20 episodes Season 6: 13 episodes

This means that LucasFilm released 121 of their ostensibly planned 176 episodes. Adding the 4 episodes used for the film gives us 125.

Subtracting these two gives us a figure of 51 episodes remaining. These 51 episodes were likely in various stages of completion when the buyout occurred.

Looking at the seasons, Season 6 is not constructed like the rest, but rather, a bulk release of product. Assuming that Season 5 was intended to be the new model going forward, we can subtract 7 of those 51 unreleased episodes to round out Season 6 to it's intended length of 20 episodes.

This leaves us with 44 episodes. Divide that by 2, and you get 22 episodes. 22 episodes for a theoretical Season 7 and a theoretical Season 8.

Out of the 51 episodes not completed and released by LucasFilm, 28 have been adapted and released via other means. This leaves at least 23 episodes of Star Wars: The Clone Wars about which we know absolutely nothing, listed below:

5.22 5.23 5.24 6.17 6.18 6.19 6.20 7.01 7.02 7.03 7.04 7.09 7.10 7.11 7.12 7.13 7.14 7.15 7.16 7.17 7.18 7.19 7.20

These include a 3-episode arc from Block 5, a 4-episode arc from Blocks 6 and 7, and almost the entirety of the middle of Block 7.

These numbers are not solid. It's possible that Blocks 5 through 7 were intended to be 26 episodes as all the others were. That would add 6 episodes, for 182 planned episodes, and 57 uncompleted, about which we know nothing about 29 of them.

It's possible that Seasons 5 and 6 were intended to be 22 episodes as all the other seasons were, and things simply didn't work out that way. This would mean 11 episodes would be needed to round out the seasons, rather than 0 for Season 5 and 7 for Season 6.

This could leave us with 40 or 42 episodes to divide between a theoretical Season 7 and 8. 2 seasons of 20 episodes, or a season of 20 and a season of 22.

There are many possibilities, wrapped in shadows and behind closed doors, regarding this series. We will likely never know the facts, simply because the facts are nebulous and were not, nor ever will be, solidified.

But we can know for sure is that the original intended versions of Blocks 6 and 7, plus the final 3 episodes of Block 5, will likely never be finished, and that we have lost George Lucas' original vision for this series. Those 51 episodes, while potentially getting adapted, will never be released or even completed the way they were originally intended.

(Although George Lucas has stated previously that Star Wars is "like poetry, it rhymes", this series does seem to be lacking in rhyming. Production blocks and season lengths both change midway through, and there seems to have been intended 8 seasons, which is annoyingly only 1 short from matching the intended number of Star Wars movies: 9.)

This is a tremendous shame, because Star Wars: The Clone Wars is a fantastic series which lovingly and accurately adapts a big-screen property for the small screen, tells a dense, varied, but cohesive story, and expands the universe that so many of us have loved since 1977.

We wanted to know about the Clone Wars since that time, and we finally got it. While we may never see the original, epic conclusion, we should still be grateful for 6 seasons of wonderful television.

This post was typed listening to the theme for Star Wars: The Clone Wars on repeat for about 3 hours. As stated at the top, all information is publicly and freely available on Wikipedia.

Thanks for reading.

[bainofjustice]

Okay got to watch the dev dairy for lore, and I gotta say this more than anything has gotten me the most excited for pd3.

Firstly I am very interested in what the tl looks like as they mention gaining the pardons but it is also pretty clear from the pd2 dlc tapes the new bad guy is avenging Murkywater so my own theory is that the two versions of the white house heist are canonly combined, getting the pardons and confronting The Dentist/Healer.

Okay next is that I am extremely intrigued by Shade, an old comtact of Bain according to the devs, who swopped in just in the nick of time. I am admittedly not sure I trust her, so far all of Bain's old contacts have been allies to the gang, it could be time for a twist, though admittedly I'm not sure I want that. Either way I hope that like Duke, Bain's other well known old contact she knows about Katru stuff, it'd be hard to have the voice in the ear not in the know. Either way I am excited to learn more about her motives and goals.

Now as for Pearl I am really curious as to who brought her in and why she has mutual enemies with the rest of the gang after all why get involved with fighting a group who was able to take the assets of some of the best criminals in the world and has a shit ton of assianions on their side?

Also oof that Dallas is more somber now, I mean yeah life has been shit for him, lost Bain, lost his retirement and his brother is missing at best and at worst is dead.

Speaking of that I am curious about them implying the assassinaions might have killed members of the gang, my best guess is that crossover characters are the most likely to have met this fate or die during the story of the game since they can't show up much in the flesh anyways so at least they could add to the stakes. I am very willing to believe that the youtubers were taken out before the start of the game by the enemy group.

Also I found it both really funny and sad that apparently the worst time in Wolf's life was retirement but it does add up, he hasn't gotten any treatment for his extreme traumas and mental issues so like it's not like he could go to a civi life, besides as far as we know his family is m.i.a and the Payday gang was the only thing remotely close to a support system he had so like, no wonder he is happy that someone is now after he and the gangs lives and took everyone's money, it means he has his friends back alongside the only form of life he is currently adjusted to.

There is one thing that is on my mind tho... There are rn three main characters that are woman, both extra heisters and the voice in the ear, I believe this is to catch up with the core four being male, but... We need one more so either

A weapons dealer or something along these lines will be a woman

One of the first villains will be a woman

Or... hear me out, this is how Jordan Griffin could still be a main character in the payday franchise-

[tourdion]

GirlBloke's Post: @GirlBlokeWrites

Just crossed paths with the elusive "Owlservice." 😳 Has anyone else had run-ins with this mysterious enigma? What's the deal with them? 🤔 #OwlserviceMystery #SpillTheTea

Tourdion's Comment: @TourdionTales

GirlBloke, brace yourself! 🦉 "Owlservice" is like a riddle wrapped in a mystery. Rumor has it they're up to some sneaky business. Any theories on what they're really up to?

GirlBloke's Reply: @GirlBlokeWrites

Tourdion, I'm deep into conspiracy mode! 👀 What if Owlservice is secretly controlling the owl population for world domination? 😂 Okay, maybe not, but seriously, what's their deal? Anyone else out there with intel?

Tourdion's Response: @TourdionTales

GirlBloke, your theory has me intrigued! 😂 Who knows what Owlservice is cooking up in their mysterious owl lair? 🕵️‍♂️ Let's gather more intel from the Tumblrverse. Any fellow detectives out there with info on Owlservice's shenanigans?

GirlBloke's Update: @GirlBlokeWrites

Tumblr detectives, assemble! 🕵️‍♀️ Got some anonymous tips about Owlservice's involvement in an underground owl art heist. 🦉🎨 Is this for real, or are we diving into owl-themed fan fiction territory? #OwlserviceConspiracies

Tourdion's Comment: @TourdionTales

GirlBloke, an owl art heist? Now that's a plot twist! 🤯 Let's keep our eyes peeled for more clues. Who would've thought the world of owl-themed mystery could be so captivating? 🦉🔍

Their playful banter and conspiracy theories about the mysterious "Owlservice" added a touch of humor and intrigue to their Tumblr interactions. The conversation unfolded like a whimsical detective story, with GirlBloke and Tourdion weaving imaginative tales around the enigmatic figure of Owlservice. The Tumblr community joined in the fun, contributing their own theories and creating a lighthearted space for owl-themed speculations.

[circusgoth-dotcom]

⬇️Information⬇️

Corvus Grace/Zero: Corvus is my Dark Knight s/i. Like most Gothamites, Corvus was poor and desperate. Desperate enough to let himself be convinced by some of The Joker's goons that he'd be in for a lot of cash if he worked with them. When Joker came to "clean up the evidence" after the heist, there was something about Corvus that intrigued him, and so he was left alive, and even paid. As Joker let Corvus hang around him more and more, he quickly earned the nickname Zero, and became known as the only accomplice Joker would never turn his back on.

Valentine Van Helsing: My Dracula s/i, technically inspired by the Francis Ford Coppola adaptation but mainly shipped with a mixture of Bela Lugosi's Dracula, Gary Oldman's Dracula, and my own interpretation of the character. The only son of Abraham Van Helsing, Valentine was brought up as "a good and well-educated man" who lightly entertained his father's belief in "vampyrs" and other mythological creatures. However, when he begins to be charmed by a mysterious foreigner he met at a ball, his father's theories begin to become more reality than fiction.

[whimsicaldragonette]

ARC Review: Unseelie by Ivelisse Housman

Order

Add to Goodreads

Publication Date: January 3, 2023

Synopsis:

Twin sisters, both on the run, but different as day and night. One, a professional rogue, searches for a fabled treasure; the other, a changeling, searches for the truth behind her origins, trying to find a place to fit in with the realm of fae who made her and the humans who shun her.  Iselia “Seelie” Graygrove looks just like her twin, Isolde… but as an autistic changeling trying to navigate her unpredictable magic, Seelie finds it more difficult to fit in with the humans around her. When Seelie and Isolde are caught up in a heist gone wrong and make some unexpected allies, they find themselves unraveling a larger mystery that has its roots in the history of humans and fae alike.  Both sisters soon discover that the secrets of the faeries may be more valuable than any pile of gold and jewels. But can Seelie harness her magic in time to protect her sister, and herself?

My Rating: ★★★★★

*My Review and Favorite Quotes below the cut.

My Review:

I loved this! The writing is gorgeous, the characters are compelling and intriguing and felt very real, and the plot kept me guessing while still feeling familiar. My absolute favorite thing about it though is that Seelie is an autistic main character who is very believably autistic. She is also very, very relatable (to me, anyway) and I really felt and understood her decisions and choices. Sometimes they annoyed me a little, but I always understood them.

Raze is a character I couldn't quite pin down, and that's a good thing. He's so layered and has so many deflecting shields that he doesn't really let people in. Seelie is probably the closest he's let anyone get, just by virtue of adventuring together and being in constant peril.

I loved Isolde. It would be fascinating to see things from her perspective, but I'm glad we're given Seelie's. I especially loved the love they feel and the way they are bonded together as sisters against everything. I hope we get a lot more of Isolde in the next book.

Olani is also a fascinating character, and one I want to spend more time with in the next book. She has layers too, and I like her outlook and her combination of healer's patience and adventurer's spirit.

Gossamer is fascinating in more of a horrified fascination sort of way, but I really appreciate the way his nature contrasting with Seelie's brings her more into herself. I am very intrigued by his story and what we will discover in the next book.

I cannot stress enough how much I love that the entire premise of this book is that changeling myths are an early description of autism. Seelie is a changeling, and very obviously autistic, and a wonderful main character. And the revelation about Seelie and Isolde at the end! I was not expecting it and that made it even more impactful and thought-provoking.

I loved the faerie realms and the magic and the adventure and basically all of it. This is exactly the sort of book that I love, complete with reluctant banding together of adventurers for the quest (one of my favorite tropes).

There are a lot of questions left unanswered at the end, but enough of a temporary resolution that I don't feel like it's a cliffhanger exactly. I definitely want to know more, and I can't wait for the next book.

*Thanks to Inkyard Press and Bookishfirst for providing an early copy for review.

Favorite Quotes:

Night doesn’t fall in the Unseelie Realm. Here, night staggers drunkenly, clawing at the blue sky with its dark fingers. Desperate and Hungry.

---

This is a first for me, but some of the quotes that spoke to me the most were actually in the Author's Note rather than the text itself. I decided to include them here because they give important context to the story and to Seelie herself.

From the Author's Note:

How do you write about autism without using the word autism?

---

This book was inspired by the theory that changeling mythology is an early description of autistic children…

---

I wanted to write a story about someone like me, a story where the autistic character is the center of her own narrative.

---

And if you see yourself in these pages, I want to tell you what I wish someone had told me. You are exactly the way you were meant to be, and you are the hero of your own story.

[asm5129]

Flash thoughts 9x03

Okay, things are really heating up! (no pun intended, what with a heat-based meta appearing this week and all)

This was a really fun episode. I’m not personally invested in the Flash’s rogues but I know a lot of folks are, so i hope they’re enjoying this season cuz it’s going all in. This episode was delightfully comic-book-y. Great banter, fun camp, a little macgunffin-ish type thing, and a smidge of pathos to tie it all together.

was this the best episode? Nah. Not really any standout emotional moments or big reveals (i know there’s the ending, but we’ll get there) or anything, and it definitely doesn’t hit the heights of the previous episode's ethical core, but it was really fun, and it progressed the plot well along the way--so not a waste of time in my book. 

Hartley is delightfully smug, Goldface is campy fun as always, and Jago is a delight in his Regular Guy-ness--with the nuance of his son in the picture as well of course. (side note, the flirting between him and Fiddler was a lot of fun)

It was pretty clear Mark was heading down the path of teaming up with red death but i didn’t expect him to get there so quickly (damn you shorter episode count). Still, i think it works. 

Anyways the whole heist thing with Barry in a bit of a gray area was really fun. And yeah, while Barry has every right not to trust Goldface--or even Mark at this point--Hartley and Jago definitely didn’t deserve to be lumped in with them. Especially Jago, as he rightfully points out to Barry. It’s funny that these Rogues knew every one of them was going to try and steal it for themselves, but since they were all on the same page there they could kind of “trust” each other to be selfish. they knew exactly where each other stood. Barry would have tried to stop ALL of them, so they couldn’t couldn’t on him the same way.

Side note, I’m glad Barry’s “i have to give them a reason to trust me first” instinct wasn't to reveal his identity YET AGAIN. Probably only because half of them already knew it, but still--it was refreshing for him to try and figure some other way to get people to trust him. Plus the fact that the other two figured it out anyway was actually a lot more fun.

The Allegra and Chester thing has been going on for a while now, and while i didn’t love it in the beginning i have to say it’s grown on me. they’ve taken their time, had these two build up a rapport and a regular social life together outside star labs, and really leaned into the actor’s chemistry together. I’ve always been found it odd just how averse they are to dating when they both are pretty clearly on the same page there, so I’m happy we’re at least getting Alelgra’s side to that conflict finally. 

Khione continues to shine with her piercing insights. I really like her. 

WestAllen is still being written better than anything pre-s8 imo.

There’s not as much meat to this episode so i don’t have as much to say, so let’s finish off talking about the red Death developments.

So yeah, look, I knew it was Ryan Wilder months ago. It was announced officially i think. That wasn’t really a reveal. The question is, why? The next time teaser hints that Barry believes it’s current day Ryan corrupted by the Negative Speed Force, but Eric Wallace has hinted at something much deeper than that in interviews--so for the time being, I’m sticking to my theory that this is Armageddon Ryan, and we’ll see present day earth prime Ryan in the very near future--perhaps kidnapped by the Red Death so she could take her place and Wayne Enterprises wouldn’t be answering to two Ryans? I dunno. 

but MAN it feels good to see Javicia Leslie back in the Arrowverse one last time. A little bit of a missed opportunity to not have her say “I am justice” as opposed to “I am Vengeance” cuz i really liked that she was saying “justice will be served” last episode, but maybe’s she’s conflated the two? We’ll see. I’m very intrigued to see Javicia’s villainous turn. 

[influencermagazineuk]

Top 10 Must-See Mystery Thrillers That Will Keep You Guessing

Mystery thriller movies have always been a popular genre among moviegoers. The combination of suspense, intrigue, and unexpected plot twists keeps audiences on the edge of their seats until the very end. Whether it's a murder mystery, a psychological thriller, or a conspiracy theory, these movies leave us guessing until the final reveal. In this article, we will delve deeper into the world of mystery thrillers and recommend the top movies in this genre. Mystery thriller movies often involve a protagonist who must unravel a complex web of clues to solve a mystery. The audience is also encouraged to play detective along with the protagonist and try to piece together the clues to solve the mystery. The best mystery thrillers keep the audience guessing until the very end and often feature unexpected plot twists that leave us reeling. One of the greatest examples of this genre is the classic movie, "Psycho" (1960). Directed by Alfred Hitchcock, the movie follows a woman who checks into a motel run by a disturbed young man. What follows is a suspenseful and horrifying tale that has become a landmark in cinema history. Creator: Knut Koivisto  Another great example of the mystery thriller genre is "Se7en" (1995). Directed by David Fincher, the movie follows two detectives as they hunt down a serial killer who bases his murders on the seven deadly sins. The movie's climax is one of the most shocking in movie history, and the twist ending is still talked about to this day. Other notable movies in this genre include "The Silence of the Lambs" (1991), "Gone Girl" (2014), and "Shutter Island" (2010). Each of these movies offers a unique take on the mystery thriller genre and is sure to keep audiences engaged from start to finish. Memento Now, without further ado, here are our top mystery thriller movies of all time: - "Memento" (2000) - Directed by Christopher Nolan, this movie follows a man suffering from short-term memory loss as he tries to solve the mystery of his wife's murder. - "The Usual Suspects" (1995) - Directed by Bryan Singer, the movie follows a group of criminals who are brought together for a heist. But things aren't what they seem, and the movie's twist ending will leave you reeling. - "Mulholland Drive" (2001) - Directed by David Lynch, this movie follows an aspiring actress as she tries to make it in Hollywood. But things take a dark turn as she becomes embroiled in a mystery involving a car crash and a mysterious woman. - "Fight Club" (1999) - Directed by David Fincher, this movie follows an insomniac office worker who creates a "fight club" with a charismatic soap salesman. But as the club grows, things take a sinister turn. - "The Prestige" (2006) - Directed by Christopher Nolan, this movie follows two magicians as they compete to create the ultimate illusion. But their rivalry turns deadly, and the movie's twist ending will leave you stunned. - "Zodiac" (2007) - Directed by David Fincher, the movie follows the hunt for the notorious Zodiac Killer who terrorized San Francisco in the 1960s and 1970s. - "Prisoners" (2013) - Directed by Denis Villeneuve, this movie follows a man who takes matters into his own hands when his daughter goes missing. But as he digs deeper into the mystery, he uncovers dark secrets that threaten to destroy him. - "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" (2011) - Directed by David Fincher, this movie follows a journalist and a computer hacker. Se7en In addition to those classics, there are also some newer mystery thrillers that have become instant favorites among moviegoers. One such film is "Gone Girl" (2014), based on the novel by Gillian Flynn. This movie tells the story of a man whose wife goes missing and he becomes the prime suspect in her disappearance. With twists and turns that keep the audience guessing until the very end, "Gone Girl" is a must-see for fans of the genre. Another recent film that has garnered critical acclaim and a large following is "Knives Out" (2019), directed by Rian Johnson. This movie follows a detective investigating the death of a wealthy family's patriarch, and the family members who become suspects in the case. With an all-star cast including Daniel Craig, Chris Evans, and Jamie Lee Curtis, "Knives Out" offers a fresh take on the classic whodunit mystery. Other notable mystery thrillers from recent years include "The Girl on the Train" (2016), "Wind River" (2017), "Searching" (2018), and "The Invisible Guest" (2016). Each of these movies offers unique twists and turns that will keep audiences on the edge of their seats. In summary, mystery thriller movies offer an exciting and suspenseful viewing experience that leaves audiences guessing until the very end. From classic films like "Vertigo" and "Rear Window" to newer releases like "Gone Girl" and "Knives Out," there is no shortage of great movies in this genre. If you're looking for a thrilling night in, any of the films on this top 10 list are sure to satisfy. Read the full article

[halflingkima]

First Chapter Test: Romance Edition

so i finished that regency romance/crime thriller and wanted more of that vibe and yes i have 12 other books checked out but the other night i got drunk and put a bunch more on hold. this'll include the romances i mentioned in my last first chapter test, but i figure it'll be helpful to have them all in the same place.

Palace Project

In the Case of Heartbreak by Courtney Kae: I've had In the Event of Love on my TBR for a bit, but it's a holiday read and i def wanna read that in the appropriate season, so i was pleased to find the sequel is set in summer! how timely. apparently it's a friends to lovers/best friend's sibling sitch with a sorta baking contest involved. the writing style is promising, it's weakest point being the sequel-catch-up spiel: the rapid intro of a bunch of characters real fast made my head spin. but i think it'll be okay from here on.

Hockey Bois by AL Heard: Was a little put off when this one had a fanfiction-style tags/tropes list up front, but the writing style is perfectly good. The main character is just starting to play hockey on a team/in a league as an adult, and the stoic team star takes an interest in helping him practice. I'm hoping the "grump" role will slip from the love interest soon, but it's a really decent start, and i will probably continue.

The Mastermind by Amy Lane: Amy Lane is truly hit or severe miss for me and i've not enjoyed a book of hers in a while. i've been interested in this heist/con artist series for a while, but never enough. i know i've read this first chapter before, and rereading it, remembered why i put it down: the main plotline focuses directly on a (white) woman "ruining" a man's "legacy" through falsifying claims of discrimination. While i know the author to treat her women characters very well, the concept still makes me uncomfortable. I think i'll press on for now, but i can easily put it down if there's nothing intriguing enough to make up for the unbelievable female antagonist set-up. Also: a LOT of telling in this first chapter, when I would've liked the characters' past to unravel over a bit more time.

String Theory by Ashlyn Kane: Wanted to read a hockey romance, but Palace doesn't have the first of this author's series, and i don't wanna skip around in that one, so I compromised with this unrelated book. that being said, this was surprisingly the weakest link on this platform so far (i had very low expectations for Hockey Bois). The opening was a little confusing – i think i read the prologue? also haven't met the second character, and all i learned in this one is that one of the main characters is a slut with a very stoic roommate lmao. I'll hold out until i meet both characters, but i'm 50/50 on this one.

Physical

A Marvelous Light by Freya Marske: Oh I had high hopes for this one based on all the good things i've heard and my recent regency mood but the first chapter did not serve it well. It's regency(?) era with magic, and i think i remember there's a sorta mystery (thriller?) aspect to it, but the very short first chapter has a lot of samey characters with little worldbuilding and a lot of action, which while a strong way to start, is not the vibe i was looking for at the moment. i don't think i'll fully dnf now that it's in my possession, but it will probably sit in my pile of shame for a while before it get to it.

The Prospects by KT Hoffman: ok first of all, didn't realize the main character is also TRANS and now i'm HYPE about it. the first chapter was great 10/10 no notes i fuckin love sports romances i'm so glad this is finally out and owned by my library system and in my HANDS

The Ride of Her Life by Jennifer Dugan: The true panic cover "buy" (check-out). I have no clue what it's about but it was available and had two ladies on the cover. And looked a lil country, but I think it's about horses? The most stereotypical first chapter in the world, didn't reveal all that much, but the writing style is very readable. I truly have no verdict on this, i'll have to get a little further.

Hoopla

Delay of Game by Ari Baran: Knowing the main characters of this book from the previous one in the series, this story def started as a bucky/cap hockey au and i KNOW it's gonna be stunning. that being said, the first few bits are a huge flashback and reframe the characters a lot, which kinda knocked me for a loop. I'm also afraid to read this before my library has the next one; i need my book safety net. T_T I'm also a little concerned my expectations are a bit too high for this one lol

Libby

New Adult by Timothy Janovsky: The sliding doors/alternate timelines concept is very different from what I've read from this author, so I'm a little concerned in that regard. I also don't personally like stand-up comedy all that much, and I hope there's not too much of that on-page. I also found the set-up a little rough. I'll probably go ahead and read this to get it off my tbr, and it'll probably be a good time. im not sure it's strong enough to bump the slump though.

Afterlove by Tanya Byrne: Genuinely don't know what to expect from this one. I've only heard of it bc i think Fairyloot? sent it as a bonus book in a box and some booktubers unboxed it. I've not seen anyone read it or heard anything of it since. There's something about death and undeath and teen girls in love. I don't have super high hopes bc it's YA but the opening was strong and i'm interested to see where the plot goes, though i'm not invested in the romance much at all at this point.

[jessica-problems]

offer to DM, then pass off a completely different game as "heavily homebrewed D&D", and hope they don't notice until they're already deep into the campaign. do not do this. But seriously, If you want to get people to branch out from D&D, I would suggest running a few smaller games to show people that games outside D&D aren't as scary as they seem. There are plenty of simple fun systems out there that are *built* for quick easy play and single session adventures. Off the top of my head, Honey Heist and F.I.S.T. both let you generate characters in in well under a minute, and lend themselves well to a single session of a self-contained mission objective. These can easily slot in to fill a session if, say, one player couldn't show up. Also, there are a number of games that are only a little further from D&D than Pathfinder is. A lot of OSR(Old School Revival) games(Mork Borg or Dungeon Crawl Classics for example) are pretty similar to early editions of D&D. Your friends might be comfortable with one of those. And if you're willing to put in the time, I'm sure you could come up with some way to summarize most games as "like, D&D, but with ABC instead of EFG". which might be easier for your friend than "literally everything is different figure it out yourself" If the rules aren't the problem, but they like the setting of D&D, there's also a few games that are basically "D&D rebuilt in another system", like Dungeon World is approximately "use the rules for Apocalypse World to run a D&D dungeon crawl." To convert your question about horse-shaped checkers pieces back into RPG terms, my advice would be, if someone recommends you go play some other game instead, even if you don't plan to actually play it, it's probably worth checking it out to see if you can steal some rules from it. It might be that it solves your problem perfectly and you *can* just copy the section you want back into your D&D game. But sometimes, the game they recommend is just too different to be easily compatible with D&D. Things like computer hacking, car chases, or squad-based combat, can all fit pretty well into the rest of D&D's ruleset. Basically anything that boils down to "the cool action heroes have one more tool in their toolbox to fight the bad guys with" should slot in just fine. For these ones, basically anything branded as "D20" or "OGL"(Open Game License) should be almost completely compatible with D&D. Many fans of smaller little indie games who have smug opinions about dice mechanics and 'theory of play' and shit often dismiss them as "just reskinned D&D"(I will admit I have been known to do this) but in this case, adding a little spice to D&D is exactly what you're looking for. So if you want to add, for example, cyberpunk hacking rules to D&D, a quick google search suggests the OGL game Cybernet has d20 compatible hacking rules that you could likely get away with stealing unchanged. But there are other topics that D&D really just isn't equipped for. The biggest gap that comes to mind is interpersonal intrigue in the vein of something like game of thrones or desperate housewives, with lots of sneaking around, conspiring, eavesdropping on rumors, betraying people and so on. Sure, you can *rp* any kind of scene you want, but as written, but D&D has zero rules for anything, like, reputation, political alliances, suspicion or anything. Also, the combat is balanced for longer tactical fights when a political game probably wants quick, simple, extremely lethal combat, or perhaps some kind of formal honor-duel system. If you tried to run a court intrigue-focused game in D&D, You'd basically be making it up as you go along. And because that sort of stuff is unlikely to overlap with the stuff actually covered by D&D rules, my recommendation would be to find an entire game that's already well suited for courtly intrigue, and simply use that system for all the intrigue related stuff, then switch back to the D&D rules when you're doing stuff that D&D is better suited for. Is that all helpful advice?

Seeing @thydungeongal constantly wrestling with people interpreting her posts about D&D in ways that seem completely alien to me has convinced me that there are actually multiple completely distinct activities both being referred to as "playing D&D" Before we begin, I want to stress that I'm not saying one of these groups is Playing The Game Wrong or anything, but there seems to be a lot of confusion and conflict caused by people not being aware of the distinction. In fact, either one works just fine if everyone's on the same page. So far, I think I've identified at least two main groups. And nobody seems to realize the distinction between these groups even exists. The first group of people think of "Playing D&D" as, well, more or less like any other board game. Players read the whole rulebook all the way through, all the players follow the instructions, and the gameplay experience is determined by what the rules tell each player to do. This group thinks of the mechanics as, not exactly the *whole* game, but certainly the fundamental skeleton that everything else is built on top of. People in the second group think of "Playing D&D" as referring to, hanging out with their friends, collaboratively telling a story inspired by some of the elements in the rulebooks, maybe rolling some dice to see what happens when they can't decide. This group thinks of the mechanics of the game as, like... a spice to sprinkle on top of the story to mix things up. (if you belong to this second group, and think I'm explaining it poorly, please let me know, because I'm kind of piecing things together from other people saying things I don't understand and trying to reverse engineer how they seem to be approaching things.) I think this confusion is exacerbated by the fact that Wizards of the Coast markets D&D as if these are the same thing. They emphatically are not. the specific rules laid out of the D&D rulebooks actually direct players to tell a very specific kind of story. You can tell other stories if you ignore those rules (which still counts as "playing D&D" under the second definition, but doesn't under the first)And I think people in both groups are getting mad because they assume that everyone is also using their definition. For example, there's a common argument that I've seen play out many times that goes something like this:

A: "How do I mod D&D to do [insert theme here]?" B: "D&D is really not built for that, you should play [other TTRPG] that's designed for it instead" A: "But I don't want to learn a whole new game system!" B: "It will be easier to just learn a whole new system than mod D&D to do that." A: "whatever, I'll just mod D&D on my own" And I think where this argument comes from is the two groups described above completely talking past each other. No one understands what the other person is trying to say. From A's perspective, as a person in the second group, it sounds like A: "Anyone have some fun inspirations for telling stories about [insert theme here]?" B: "You can't sit around a table with your friends and tell a story about that theme! That's illegal." A: "But we want to tell a story about this theme!" B: "It's literally impossible to do that and you're a dumb idiot baby for even thinking about it." A: "whatever, jerk, I'll figure it out on my own."

--- Whereas, from B's perspective, the conversation sounds like A: "How do I change the rules of poker to be chess, and not be poker?" B: "uhhh, just play chess?" A: "But I already know how to player poker! I want to play poker, but also have it be chess!" B: "what the hell are you talking about? What does that even mean. They're completely different games." A: "I'm going to frankenstein these rules together into some kind of unplayably complex monster and you can't stop me!" ---

So both people end up coming away from the conversation thinking the other person is an idiot. And really, depending on how you concieve of what it means to "play D&D" what is being asked changes considerably. If you're only planning to look through the books for cool story inspiration, maybe borrow a cool little self contained sub-system here or there, then yeah, it's very possible to steal inspiration for your collaborative story from basically anywhere. Maybe some genres are kind of an awkward fit together, but you can make anything work with a little creativity.

If, however, you are thinking of the question in terms of frankensteining two entire board games together, then it becomes a massively difficult or even outright nonsensical idea. For example, for skill checks, the game Shadowrun has players roll a pool of several d6 at once, then count up how many rolled above a target value to see how well a character succeeded at a task. The whole game is full of specific rules about adding or removing dice from the pool, effects happening if you roll doubles, rerolling only some of the dice, and all sorts of other things that simply do not translate to rolling a single d20 for skill checks. On a basic level, the rules of the games work very differently. Trying to make them compatible would be much harder than just learning a new game from scratch. Now, neither of these approaches is exactly *wrong*, I guess, but personally, I find the rules of TTRPGs to be fascinating and worth taking the time to engage with all the weird little nuances and seeing what shakes out. Also, the first group, "TTRPG as fancy board game" is definitely the older and more widespread one. I kind of get the impression that the second group largely got into D&D through actual play podcasts, but I don't have any actual data to back that up. So, if you're in the second group, who thinks of D&D as basically a context for collaborative storytelling first and a game second, please let me know if I'm wildly misunderstanding how you approach D&D. Because I'm pretty sure it would save us a whole lot of stupid misunderstandings.

[fromthemouthofkings]

Okay, so for obvious reasons I've seen a lot of modern ofmd au's go for the restaurant au thing, and i love it, but what I'm thinking about (heavily inspired by my love of Leverage) is an art thief au

Stede, the well-off son of a wealthy business owner, has just realized that he is very gay, actually, and so he leaves his ruler-straight Old Money life and fucks off to become a Gentleman Thief. He’s read a bunch of stories about cat burglars and has a whole scrapbook of newspaper clippings covering the Gardiner Museum Heist, the Pink Panthers, and, of course, the famous thief Blackbeard, and he definitely wants to fuck him be just like him.

He hires the crew:

Jim is a trained assassin who prefers knives to guns.

Olu used to be a fence for gems and jewelry at Jackie's polyam thief bar, and now he's just trying to keep Jim alive despite their chronic tendency to hand him all their brain cells and go “yolo."

Lucius is a former pickpocket turned artist/forger.

Pete claims to have been on the famous thief Blackbeard’s crew and may have actually been a low-level goon hired for a few jobs.

Frenchie is a hacker who used to work on the other side (whilst being constantly microagressioned by the snobby military/CEO types/etc) and therefore knows all the ins. He also creates edm music and is active on conspiracy theory boards and is afraid of cats because he believes that they are aliens in disguise studying humanity.

John’s mother does costuming for a theater and he’s consequently very good at makeup and disguises.

Roach went to culinary school and also went through EMT training before turning to crime.

The Swede stole something really valuable from his home country (an orange-shaped gem-encrusted statue known as “The Swedish Faberge Egg”), but due to a lot of bumbling, he was nearly caught like ten times between stealing it and fleeing the country. He gained a reputation because most thieves only heard about the high-profile robbery and not the bumbling, so he is considered something of a legend, known only as “The Swede.” (Stede hires him fully believing the hype.)

And Buttons is a seasoned thief who seems to be able to summon seagulls at will and still longs to make sweet love to the sea and also is known for biting people in fights, which is how he’s escaped law enforcement for so long (he will neither confirm nor deny the rumor that he’s some kind of selkie). He’s also good with safes and locks.

Ed is a famously skilled and ruthless thief who is known for pulling off a huge variety of different jobs. Robbed a casino, stolen art from the Louvre, hit seven banks at once, auctioned off secret government research--you name it, he’s done it. (The truth is, he gets bored.) Just the rumor that he’s planning a heist causes museums to pull all of their displays. His methods tend towards the quick, violent, and brutally effective, and he's tired and disillusioned with them, but he feels stuck maintaining the Blackbeard persona for fear of rivals or law enforcement catching up with him. When he hears that Stede is trying to be a real life Gentleman Thief, like in the movies, he is intrigued.

Izzy, meanwhile, is the actual perpetrator of much of the violence that Blackbeard is credited with. Together, Izzy and Ed are the backbone of the Blackbeard legend: Edward comes up with the brilliant, daring, creative plans, and Izzy carries them out with deadly efficiency. They’ve also been on-again off-again romantic partners/fuckbuddies for years. They live in each other’s pockets, and know each other inside and out, and are able, when pressed, to work together seamlessly. They also make each other miserable a lot of the time, and enable each other’s worst tendencies, and Izzy is hanging all of his identity and self-worth off a job that Ed doesn’t even like anymore.

Ed swoops in and saves Stede from a disastrous robbery, during which all of Ed's crew get arrested besides Izzy, Fang, and Ivan. He decides to stick around and teach Stede how to be a real thief (and maybe kill him to steal his identity. Or maybe fuck him. He hasn’t decided yet).

Izzy is certain that Stede is going to get them all killed.

Also, Mary started painting in earnest after Stede left, but she hasn't heard anything from him, and he hasn't kept up with her at all, so they're both very surprised to meet again at a gallery where Mary is showing some of her work and which Stede is attempting to rob.