#internal ramblings
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okay wow, this song hits.
I'm a no good Nashville nothing
mama says that it'll pass
blink your eyes and you'll be something
and this will all be in the past
If you know about me and my past and all of that, you might have an idea of how hard this hits. It was shared with me just this morning and I haven't been able to stop listening to it. Very grateful it was shared with me, it connects so deeply.
As a someone who was dragged in and spit out by the music industry, yeah... I feel it. Even to this day I still ponder on "What if I had just kept trying?" and feeling totally washed up.
I think this song perfectly encapsulates the slow, steady plod you do as a songwriter and musician, and the scary thoughts that are very realistic of never actually making it.
Nashville is legitimately home for me, but I also can't stand it. I will never live there again.
These past few years have been an exercise in learning to just love music again after my ~legendary meltdown~. It has been a long healing process, but who knows, maybe I'll write a song again here soon.
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Thinking about DP x DC Jason Todd being a revenant again. Here's my scenario. Jason gets called that by some ghost. He's like "what the fuck is that supposed to mean?" He's heard the term before but he doesn't know any actual lore. He googles it. He scrolls past the Leonardo DiCaprio bear movie. He opens the wiki. Sees the words "animated corpse" and gets a chill diwn his spine. He starts reading the first section.
He closes Wikipedia.
That night he has a nightmare that his family buried him, again, this time with precautions. He wakes up in his own grave, full of stones, too heavy to move, to scream.
#CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THIS#like reading this section in the context of jason is SO HORRIFYING#the idea of someone knowing it was possible for him to come back. to wake up down there. and wanting to keep him there#stay dead. we want you dead. you're too troublesome alive. you're meant to be down there.#so anyways. jason internalizing all this shit and feeling uncomfortable in his own body because he's thinking of it as a corpse#and of himself as haunting a place he doesn't belong#and then meeting danny and danny says 'wow you're a revenant aren't you! The dead so restless they can't bear to stay in their graves'#and he smiles. 'You're amazing. Your will is so strong'#and the Ghost King tells Jason 'You're alive but that doesn't mean you aren't one of mine. I will come for you'#and batman says 'we will keep you safe from that entity and his threats. you don't belong to him'#and jason says 'he didn't mean i was his possession. he said i was his responsibility. he said he would help me if i ever needed him'#and bruce sees the faraway look in his son's eyes and doesn't know what to say#okay I'm done#for now#dp x dc#dpxdc#revenant jason todd#danny phantom#dc#batfam#jason todd#my rambles#my writing
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It's uncharitable but - there's a tendency for online liberals/progressives to act like everyone from a immigrant-heavy community naturally and automatically supports universally liberalized and expanded immigration laws - and, like, I really can't help but feel this isn't a opinion you can sustain if you actually interact with any number of the people you're talking about.
#at least ime the folk wisdom that the housing crisis is because of all the recent immigrants and international students#is as shared by immigrants as life-long canadians#it's 2am and I'm rambling
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[Abandoned by the Lightners, his heart became cracked with hatred.]
Hitting a lil' too close to home?
#junie art post#ink sans#error sans#utmv#errorink#implied. but yea not the focus#this has been turning around in my mind for quite some time. im glad to finish it lmao idk if my ramblings make sense even.#so like listen. do you ever think about how similar the function of the utmv is to the dark worlds in deltarune.#in a meta narrative to fandom sense? idk the word#we are making exaggerated expanded worlds of the ordinary tools and entertainment of the real world and make it into something more#isnt that very very interesting?#and we explore every sort of possibility in that creation. both good and bad#and when all is said and done. every possibility found and the entertainment and secrets has all run out#we put it away. abandon and leave it behind#what is left? what happens to the world and characters we have created? can it sustain without us?#what of the ones left in the dark?#idk if yall saw me a few months ago but i reblogged comyet's old post of ink begging us not to leave him alone and to keep creating#yea that never left me#and seeing exactly THAT SCENARIO in deltarune made my brain iTCH#imagine an ink in King's position.... wait isnt that just underverse#mmmmmmm. darkner ink.....#also error is here too. not just for errorink or that i can't separate these two to save my life#but error is also one of the few people to be able to GET IT?? he can hear the creators too. ink cant#but hes pretty much programmed himself to avoid having a mental break down to this via reboot memory loss.#and ink has his own internal coping mechanism (hooray for short term memory loss)#these two idiots will do anything but confront truths lmfao#ahhh my favorite idiots. never change#mmmmm#deltarune
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Can you draw something with Doom Patrol!Edwin and Netflix!Edwin?
Maybe something about Dp!Edwin talking about his feelings for Charles with N!Edwin?
It's just something I've been thinking of, make it a little angsty?<3
Glad you asked
ko-fi
#ask ask ask#dead boy detectives#dbda#payneland#edwin x charles#doom patrol#dead patrol#cw homophobia#i know there are a couple of people who enjoy my rambly tags so these are for u#first of all anon i'm sorry i used your request to continue my story lol#most of my comics are meant to be standalones BUT#the doom patrol and dead girl detectives are all happening in the same universe#and there is indeed series of events here!#this particular one is happening after dp!edwin's feelings were exposed but before they met the girls#with that out of the way#i know this is not as funny as most of my stuff#but dp!edwin's internalized homophobia is an important thign that can't just go away because his charles loves him back#and he does love him back! in this verse#dp!charles is the only one not struggling with his feelings for his partner#dbd!charles and charlotte still have ways to go#also dbd!edwin is in no way an expert in self-acceptance but he has learned some things#i considered having him mention simon but i decided it wasn't his place to out him#(even though he's dead u know)#so yeah what he says here isn't... great#he's still putting himself down and he's still not sure if his feelings for charles are actually a good thing#but he knows HE is glad he feels this way#because fuck it it's not like he'll go to hell for it#and even if he did... he would crawl his way out
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#disco elysium#disco elysium fanart#kim kitsuragi#harrier du bois#harry du bois#this is probably one of my fav conversations in the game...#sad that not many people get to see it(?) cause you need like 7 in empathy?#comics#comic art#trans#cw blood#blood#cw smoking#my first time making a comic i hope it looks okay lmao#ough i have so many thoughts about kim and his complicated relationship with his name#im interpreting the dialogues in a very transgender way but its definitely about his racial identity too#cause its a *seolite* name#another factor of him not being seen as a revacholian#and its one of the only things he has left of his parents too#i wonder if the name kim is seen as more masculine or feminine in seol and in other isolas?#im definitely *not* projecting haha#i read once in a fic that kim *attempted* to translate his parents' letters when he was young#10/10 fic made me cry#thats why i decided to add the seolite dictionary - i dont think kim would have *tried* to learn seolite otherwise#he definitely has some kind of internalized racism he needs to get over#sorry for rambling#my art
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Just a silly guy, with silly silly thoughts.
@glowweek Day 2
Casual | Surprise
A casual surprise?😬😬😬
#Hooooo boiii this lad is about to get funky.#He was internally screaming the whole time.#It's in my core memory as a connverse fan. I'm never truly going to let this up I believe. haha#Our boy really one day went out there wanting to get married as a teen like a true classic Disney princess. 😭#It was honestly endearing but sad and also pretty embarrassing. 😔#Secondhand embarrassment aside. Steven is pretty much lucky in the romance department. Which. Deserved by the way. With all the other#crap he had to deal with.#connverse#Steven Quartz Universe#Connie Maheswaran#SU#my shiz#teal#SU comic#glowweek#connverse week#I have no idea if whatever Connie is spouting are actuallt true in real life. Good thing this can be chalked off as just a thing in their#fictional world.#Also I'm glad part of that was covered by Connie's body because I had to take a few notes from chat GPT to add in her enumerated rambling.#I had to make the glow bracelet float like that because I couldn't draw his hand holding it quiet right in that angle.#And yea that size difference is no error. That's how small Connie's wrist is compared to his hands. Or at least something like that.#comic
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MORE TRANSFEM DIPPER!!! SHE IS MY LIFEBLOOD 😭😭😭😭😭
(ur art style is so nice btw)
dipper pines and the art of repression
notes below the cut for funsies haha.
its kind of interesting to me to watch gravity falls with the lens of transfem dipper because when you watch it like that, its like. shes trying SO hard to push it down. it kind of reads like shes trying to convince not just everybody else, but HERSELF that shes a boy. like the idea that anybody could even think shes a girl is terrifying to her (this kid really does read as trans in any direction LMFAO i love dipper) but like. why transfem? right… full hc territory here, please be nice to me.
-she doesn’t like her deadname (its traditionally a masculine name, as far as i know 😭) so she goes by the nickname that as given to her because of her birthmark…
-she gets made fun of OFTEN for not being manly enough even throughout the show and so she associates femininity with Bad Thing To Be. so she CANT be a girl because being a girl would be a BAD THING FOR HER TO BE. shes 12 years old yk so like. this deep, deeeep repression sets in.
and so:
-she overcompensates. shes not just going to be manly, but shes going to be SO manly that nobody is going to make fun of her for it again. sometimes to the point where she feels like she cant even really be herself.
i feel like she doesn’t even really realize it in canon,,, its probably post-canon. but the realization would hit her SO hard. like a truck. and it would be so scary at first but then its not, then she feels Right and it feels GOOD and shes so happy and her family would love her and accept her so much and whatever WHATEVERRRR.
anyways, i was just rewatching gf and this was really making the rounds in my head the more i watched, because its kind of how i experienced being trans myself (and im transmasc so LOL) like. just repressing the thing i thought was bad and overcompensating like crazy, until i realized… that its not a bad thing to be. other people making you feel bad about it doesnt MEAN its bad. and then that realization that your identity not being what you thought it was doesn’t mean you change as a person. you’ve always just been you. but it feels better. it feels real.
#gravity falls#dipper pines#transfem dipper#gabuart#shes internalizing it but she’ll get there#sorry if i got rambly at the end there#when i say i got emotionally attatched to this headcanon i really TRULY did#LOL
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Who's the "real" me?
+ some references for the Rise-related things I included <3
#im reaaaally happy with this one hehe i had fun putting the stuff from different things shes had/worn#i feel like ppl overlook the massive identity crisis & the accompanying depression & internal conflict rise is going through during the gam#like shes trying to figure out who she is seperate from her idol image (which she constantly still clings to despite her insistance that sh#s done with it bc she does still crave that recognition and attention she got from that position. she literally breaks down crying when her#manager tells her kanami has taken her acting role and is more-or-less set to take her spot now)#and then she also struggles with finding what she wants to do with herself now that she doesnt have showbiz to worry about#i think she kinda unintentionally uses the investigation as an anchor for her to hold onto#something to keep her busy in the absence of the hustling idol life#and then she also like. again she keeps clinging to the idol image and the associated bubbly-ness and bold flirtation#because thats the ''her'' ppl liked#i dont think the way she acts during the game is ENTIRELY an act theres definitely a lot of her true self in it too#but she does have a lot of moments where she leans more heavily into the bubbly & flirty cutie act#her sl shows that for all that she wanted to retire from showbiz she isnt really ready just yet#bc she did actually enjoy being an idol. she did enjoy being able to reach out to people in this way & to finally have ppl like & accept he#the problem is she doesnt know who ''she'' is at this point#im rambling but u get my point. yeah. yeah#rise..............#rise kujikawa#persona#persona 4#p4#art#my art#xanders art#digital art#fan art
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absolutely vile that today should be about recognising legitimately important women’s issues and achievements and you go onto any social media and it’s just terf city
#ramble#international women's day#you can’t fucking trust anybody it’s miserable#you can talk about issues that affect cis women without tearing down trans women#and trans women are included in a lot of cis women’s issues#idk i want to scream sometimes#anyway trans women are women and if you don’t think so then i hope you have the day you deserve
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Zionists want you to conflate Judaism and Zionism. Zionists want you to believe that Judaism cannot exist without Zionism and that all Jews are Zionists. Zionism would have Jews believe that a Jewish state is the only way that they can be safe from antisemitism and will point to any instance of antisemitism as proof that Zionism is the solution- so Zionism wants gentiles to be antisemitic in their support of Palestine. They want you to conflate all Jews with Zionism and the state of Israel, and they want you to treat all Jews regardless of political affiliation as the face of Israel. Antizionist Jews exist, and incidences of antisemitism ostensibly acting against Zionism will not help dismantle the forces propping Zionism up.
Don't do their work for them.
#red rambles#viva palestina#antizionism#i haven't actually seen a lot of antisemitism personally. not recently anyway. but that's more a feature of me not following antisemites#i DO however see a lot of people talking about the people they're seeing throw their support behind antisemites using palestine#as an excuse to conflate all jews with israel#and i cannot stress enough that that is literally what israel and zionist forces abroad WANT.#i am jewish. my entire family is jewish. i want to see palestine free. and i have SEEN how the jewish community gets conflated with israel#both from the inside and out#and i am dead serious when i say that every time someone is antisemitic it strengthens the conviction from people abroad#that it's a terrible sad situation but there's 'no other choice'#if you're being antisemitic you are doing the enemy's work for them. Stop it.#like... look. i am putting this in the tags bc im talking in the tags but i mean this. I do not give a single flying fuck if you personally#are a giant raging antisemite at the moment. Your personal beliefs are your problem and not mine. I do not fucking care. But if you are#being openly and loudly antisemitic *in your support of palestine* you are absolutely not fucking helping. I am so dead serious right now#if you want to raise awareness and you're being antisemitic because of deep held beliefs or whatever i want you to look around and read the#fucking room. Do you understand how much of Israel's international support comes from the idea that they are the only country where jews ar#safe from antisemitism? do you see how every time palestine comes up people point at incidences of antisemitism in anti-genocide actions to#discredit the entire movement? do you not understand how your actions are cutting the movement down at the knees?#i'm jewish and proud of it. i don't like antisemitism. but there's a genocide on and i'd rather work against it than quibble over who i#work alongside. i dont fucking care. you can be as antisemitic as you like in private. stop fucking the movement up.#there are bigger things to worry about here. if i can put aside my own concerns as to who i'm talking to you can hold your tongue#and fight the good fight instead of handing weapons to the people who are trying to fucking flatten gaza.
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Recognition
#I worked on this for too long and now I can't really be satisfied with it but I can accept the fact that it is 3am and I should sleep#Okay time to ramble about monsterhaul. So obviously its something of an atypical form which means it isn't included in fan content too much#but when it is usually Nemoto's (for lack of a more eloquent term) fusion gets the spotlight which is fair and cool I love it too#However there is definitely something to be explored in the fact that Rikiya represents the violation of abstinence from err. contact#Which makes him interesting to be mushed together with the very literally and symbolically touch-averse character that is Chisaki.#And when placed before Kurono there's appeal in putting two characters normally so laden with inhibitions into a#situation where those are somewhat repealed by existing inherent filth and the dispositions of a third party.#Good concept. Anyways there's also the secondary factor I got caught up thinking about in this piece pertaining to#the escalation of Chisaki's severity in action and Hari's continued support in spite of the other's ever-decreasing resemblance to#the kid he met years ago as Chisaki abandons internal and external standards#In short I'm unwell#Going to ignore this for a while now so I don't scold myself for the anatomy#chronohaul#kurono hari#hari kurono#kai chisaki#chisaki kai#orb draws#mha#bnha#my hero academia
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someone is having thoughts (he's trying sooo hard to be nonchalant and chill)
#(alternatively: when crush looks hella good masc in a halloween costume ???)#cross!sans#self insert#mblue art#campus au#cm#cm route#cross you silly silly man <3#his internal thought on the right is so loser (/aff) i love cross so much#bro is sooo down bad ?? thinking of fangs and biting?? (him?? bite him pls?? flushed emoji???)#(he thinks the glances he makes at their fake fangs earlier went unnoticed. oh boy do i have news for you)#(the first greeting was intentional 💜 but also i think that fake fangs r kinda uncomfy?)#(so there was a lot of mouth opening n adjusting and cross got a lot of glimpses <3 lucky him)#sometimes i want to look so Boy guy that cross gets a bi panic over it 💜#yes. he is in a milkman costume (his hat is in his hand). it is funny To Me#this is what i mean by 'i want to have the yaois w cross' in that one ramble post i did (/j)
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okay WHAT is it about longer Webtoons that inspires the character to infiltrate and overthrow the government or at least fundamentally change it
#Rambles#fambles#why does this happen to often like...#Lore olympus#<- whatever tf is going on here (begging it to just end already)#Space boy#Space boy webtoon#unordinary#high class homos#<- could count since they want the law to change#AND JUST ACCIDENTALLY INCAPACITATED THE KING#Suitor armor#nomads#nomads webtoon#<- should count they want to change international law for satra's sake and have become the most wanted outlaws by ACCIDENT#Cpc#cursed Princess club#<- cause of all that happened with the Plaid Kingdom#Does castle swimmer count? Maybe#Castle swimmer#Marionetta#<- probably counts (have a feeling this series will run for a WHILE)#Realta#Like why is this so common#Webtoon
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anyways. i think its hilarious how much lbh would scream and cry if he knew how often sqq thought about sqh while they are fucking and it kills me even more that knowing that sqq thinks about him in these scenarios wholly in a derogatory or accusatory manner would actually upset him More because that should be Him he could be scolding sexily!!! neither sqq nor sqh would ever describe the verbal thrashings cucumber inflicts upon airplane as being in any way erotic but this does not help
#ramblings#bingqiu#like its not like sqq is thinking about sqh the whole time or even most of the time#it doesnt matter that anytime these thoughts occur its because sqq is internally critisizing#the stupid ass wife plots in this world or lbh's oversized cock which are (of course) literally sqh's fault (to sqq)#shizun why wont you scold binghe for binghe's oversized cock!!!! please🥺#i just think its sooooo funny that lbh is sqq's sun and moon and darling baby protagonist forever and ever#but like his kneejerk reaction upon seeing The Pillar is 'wtf airplane'#like its almost a pavlovian response. see pillar blame airplane#lbh would be inconsolable
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Happy vore day! I decided to remake a stomach pendant I made a few years ago cause I came across some tiny hinges!
Really happy how it came out now I just need to make a little guy to put in there
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