#intermittent amnesia

[drafty-castle]

i saw your story about trying to reassure someone they are not pregnant and i am just so curious about that situation and how you asked for advice is this something your worried will happen again?

i feel like there is only so many ways to reality check that should feel really obvious to you but so long as you stay calm and kind just reassuring the person those facts as simply as you can is really the best thing to do, so it seemed like you did everything right.

Hi. I’m gonna trauma dump a little, so be warned.

So, my wife has some sort of intermittent amnesia issue that no one knows how to diagnose. Two neurologist, a neuropsych, and a bevy of therapists have all poked around in her head (imaging and therapy) with no results.

It presented first as purely syncope (hello 100+ concussions in a year and the brain damage that incurs), then became syncope plus coming too with some sort of disassociation manafesting as age-regressive/retrograde amnesia that would only end with another syncopal attack, then added in non-epileptic seizures/full body convulsions in among the mess and confusion.

The amnesia is not static - she has presented as any age from four, fourteen, twenty-four, thirty-four, and everything in between. She remembers everything in her life up to the time/age she is currently embodying. It’s like time travel. The amnesia can last from minutes to hours to days. It’s all dependent on when the next syncopal attack happens. It’s like hitting the breakers on a building to reset the system (have you tried turning it off and back on again?)

Or, as I normally tell her: “Think of your mind as a palace, with hundreds of doors inside. Behind each door is a single memory. Normally, you have access to all memories, through all doors, from your earliest childhood up to [now]. However, all the doors from [presenting age] to [now] are closed and locked. They are still there, they are still in your head. You just can’t access them at the moment. When you get your memory back, you will get the key and all of the doors will fly open and all of your memories will return.”

When she regains her memories, she remembers nothing of the incident. It’s just like a black-out for her. A great blank and a chunk of missing time in her life. And if she ever returns to that age again, she never remembers having “time travelled” before so we always have to start the process all over.

Note, this is her “normal” dissociative amnesia. The kind that happened yesterday is the much more rare and far more jarring my wife just woke from a convulsion and she doesn’t know her own name, age, what a cat is, what a TV is, where babies come from, what is/is not real etc.

She was bloated so she was convinced she was pregnant. She didn’t know where babies came from so she thought I got her pregnant. No protestations to the contrary would convince her otherwise. I mistakenly called our cats “the children” (because that’s how we to refer them in the day to day) and suddenly she was convinced she was pregnant with a cat and had given birth to the other cats as well. The physical and biological impossibility of this did not compute for her at this time -> she was pregnant and the cats were our children ergo she was pregnant with a cat.

I’m fine with and have a system for dealing with her normal amnesia, no matter what age she thinks she is. I’ve read her a fairy tale and put her to bed with her thinking I was her foster mother while mentally 7, I’ve made plans for outings with a mentally 10 year old adult, I’ve kept a distraught teen calm and focused while waiting for another syncope to hit the reset button in her brain, I’ve argued with a 23 year old about needing to blend her foundation then washed all twenty layers off my wife’s face when she returned to herself and was horrified by 2010s makeup trends. I know what to do, normally.

Last night wasn’t normal.

And I can’t get any real help from anybody. No support network, no instructions from medical professionals, nothing. The neurologist said she should do therapy about it. Only, she’s been in therapy. For years. Years and years. Long before this shit started happening!

And yet it’s just. Getting. Worse.

Like, spending more time amnesiac than not, worse. Happening every day worse. Lasting for longer worse.

I’m afraid that whatever is wrong is something that science and medicine just hasn’t figured out yet. That she is the equivalent of somebody living in the 1600’s with tuberculosis and no concept of germ theory. That somebody will end up writing a break-through paper on her condition but by then it will be too late for her.

Both Mayo Clinic’s website and the neurologist keeps saying it’s oddly presenting non-epileptic seizures due to stress and she needs therapy except she’s 100% less stressed now than she ever has been in her life, this shit started within a month of getting Covid, it’s getting worse and evolving new symptoms, and I am a single person left alone to try to keep her alive.

She’s not a system in the traditional since, but I lurk on DID pages sometimes trying to glean hints on how to cope or manage when she has completely lost the plot, like last night.

… Because if I hadn’t gotten to her in time and rubbed her stomach until the bloating went down, I’m afraid she would have tried to “cut out” the “baby”, that’s how scared and in pain she was.

[jymwahuwu]

-cw: yandere, dub-con, non-con, hypnosis, mind control, aventurine's eyes don't have such abilities in the official plot of course!!

Am I the only one who felt that Aventurine's eyes were like those of a Incubus while watching the plot…? Slowly approaching us and possibly hypnotizing us in the next second?

Your memory is intermittent, like an interrupted video or a lost film. You often woke up in different places and sore, but no matter how you thought about it, it was all a blank. It could be amnesia, but they all have one thing in common. You remember that you met Aventurine before each memory loss!

For hours you were not allowed any covering, just sitting on the Aventurine-sized dildo and rocking yourself. Your hands were clenched into small fists and placed in front of your chest. A small red love heart was always shining in your eyes, and you were obedient like a loyal and obedient puppy.

Aventurine is sitting in the rocking chair next to the bed, investing casually with the device in his hand. The credits in his account were like a roller coaster, plummeting all at once, then rising again as you squirted. He had a sly and mysterious smile on his face, admiring your gasps and desperation.

"I can't believe it!! IPC really should be shut down because of you!" were your last words before this lascivious session began. He stole your customers. You point in his face and rant about his dodgy business practices and contracts. You are too righteous. It is completely out of place in this profit-oriented business market in the universe.

Aventurine can only convince you to calm down…in his own way.

Hypnotizing you is really unexpectedly fun. Witnessing your expression gradually becoming emptier and then sticking out your tongue lustfully, he couldn't help but masturbate as a reward for you. Pushing you to spread your legs on the bed. He pushes his swollen, pre-cum-prone glans into your smooth insides. Your body was so frightened that the light in your eyes dimmed, then brightened again. You screamed in pleasure and bliss as you were being fucked-

"I-I'm sorry…!! Please allow me to cum!!"

Another spurt of semen filled you deeply. He didn’t forget to push a few more times to ensure penetration was complete before pulling out and looking down at you.

"Okay. You did a great job."

"After I breed you, you don't remember anything. You only remember that you had a comfortable dream, in which you had unimaginable blessings and heavenly pleasure."

"After I leave this room, you will get dressed obediently, go back to your room, and forget about these things."

"But you're going to come over at the same time tomorrow because you need me."

"That's all."

dividers @/cafekitsune

[palant1r]

my boy Six!

He's got amnesia about his personal life from the gunshots but has other memories he can piece together to get an idea of his past. He's from the Western Shoshone nation, which is currently intermittently at war with the Legion, though that war has eased up as the Legion focuses its efforts on the NCR. He left home because he wanted to see the world, and being a courier allowed him to be a messenger between a ton of different tribal governments. Tribal governments after the war tend to use beads as currency, so he's got two very simple beaded necklaces as emergency funds.

He's a real smart cookie and has a silver tongue, and prefers to get out of situations without fighting if he can help it. This did not work out for him while trying to deal with families on the Strip, where despite fully intending to solve things peacefully, him and Veronica ended up having to beat their way out of both Gomorrah and the Ultra-Luxe.

Between his speech, lockpick and science skills, his ass is NOT being kept outta anything he wants to be in. And he loves being in locations and safes and systems and situations. Hates minding his own business.

He loves making friends, and started off his adventure just wanting to get his delivery back and then get back to his job, which he loves for the chance to meet new people and see new things. But the people he met along the way, from Boone's firsthand experience with Legion brutality to Cass's suffering at the hands of the current economic titans to Veronica's struggle to get the Brotherhood's head out of his ass, made him realize how much was at stake, and when he found out just how much power he had...well, Arcade's views on independence were the nail in the coffin, and Six has been fumbling around trying to figure out how the hell to overthrow three different governments and start a new one ever since.

He just joined the Followers of the Apocalypse, and is currently on fairly good terms with the NCR, though given how much they're dedicated to replicating settler colonialism there's no way he's letting them push past the Colorado.

He's a chronic junk hoarder, which has been made worse ever since he got the option to store shit at the Lucky 38. There is so much mac and cheese. So much armor. So, so much Sunset Sarsaparilla.

He's currently trying to use that Sunset Sarsaparilla to woo Arcade, and loves helping Arcade with his research.

hes my sweet cheese my good time boy and i am taking questions

[otakusparkle]

The Shadow (Ivy) Background Story

Almost all the residents of the town know the Lawson family, the "back-to-back sisters". From the moment they were born, they were determined to die soon. Fortunately, their father and mother refused to give up on them out of their devout faith and gave them names - Ivy and Edith. Young Ivy still remembers how the laughter and joy at home melted into silence, and how the "well-intentioned" temptations from outside the wall turned into malicious temptations.

The resistance to the surroundings and a decision took root in Ivy's heart - her stubbornness did not lead to the ideal result. Severe wound infection took away Edith on the sixth day after the separation operation, and also gave her a disability that could kill her at any time. Looking directly at Edith's face for the first time, young Ivy felt a huge absurdity: when the soul left Edith's body, she almost felt her own death.

"Freshmen" have always been prepared for desperate people. During the few years that Ivy traveled across the ocean and came to a new school, she showed amazing academic talent and made friends with similar fates to herself. Unlike her friends who are obsessed with the field of spiritual healing, Ivey has shown an extraordinary interest in soul science, and then believes that once the soul and spirit can be accurately described, measured and studied, this transcendent and ultimate knowledge will, will be able to fill the deepest void in her heart. Perhaps moved by her obsession, her friends' initial confusion about her research gradually turned into encouragement, and they even provided some pharmacological technical support from the perspective of spiritual research.

However, as the research deepened, Ivy discovered that she suffered from intermittent amnesia and was always immersed in some dreams that gave people a weird feeling. But this was not entirely a bad thing. In that short memory gap, Ivy experienced the feeling of leaping across time, from a moment in eternity, to jumping lightly and flexibly to the "now". The ancient earth, the huge and lush primitive vegetation, and the smell of minerals in the water seemed to have dissipated from us not long ago. Unfortunately, this situation did not last long. After completing hee studies, her friend left, and the feeling became increasingly dilute, until Ivy received some fragments of literature and a diary, the contents of which could provide a complete explanation for his bizarre symptoms. Explanation of. Even though the recorder has quite professional academic qualifications, these words still seem like the crazy words of a mentally abnormal person: an extremely ancient existence that travels freely through different spaces and times and firmly occupies the captive's mind. Brain and mind.

Ivy took the initiative to grasp this fragile straw. When she was conscious, she felt that she had transformed into some kind of indescribable alien, with three huge eyes unnaturally embedded in the eye sockets, and her human throat uttered some incomprehensible and wild syllables, but she Believe that this is a "gift".

Gradually, Ivy stopped showing up in school. No one knew whether she locked herself in her room again or went away.

[nartothelar]

you should do a submas fic rec post o7

Ooo good idea! Here's a few fics I adore to pieces and have reread more than a few times:

we'll build a bridge (An incomplete collection of unconnected one shots)

Summary: The only constant is this: they find each other. The how might change, but the why doesn’t, and the why is what matters, here. (The why is this: one never stops searching, and one never stops hoping.)

(Made me cry multiple times. Happy endings and heartfelt reunions: it's got everything you need to feel good inside. My favorite chaoters are 3 and 8)

Ounce of Prevention (incomplete)

Summary: If one suspects strangers of causing the apocalypse, one generally should not allow them to continue to roam free. They should ideally be restrained until their innocence (or guilt) can be proven. Even if one of them is a child and openly sobbing at the thought of her only family hating her. Even if the other one's absence is probably going to be noticed by a very large, very dangerous Pokémon.

Elsewhere, the rift spits out a man in white. He's not her Warden, but Sneasler will take all the help she can get in finding him.

(ABSOLUTELY INSANELY GOOD like this is one of my favorite submas fics. Just thrilling and had be binge it in a frenzy. Awesome action scenes, cool plot, and badass Emmet, like seriously Emmet's characterization here is god tier and I think about it constantly. I actually drew a comic based on a scene from this fic here. )

In Tandem (Incomplete)

Summary: Or in which Arceus calls upon two pairs of twins to stop two doomsday plots simultaneously.

Ingo and Emmet are summoned to two different Jubilifes, to two different teenagers to aid them in their seemingly innocent journeys for reasons they do not fully understand. Dark machinations are at work though, and if everyone wants to get home safe at the end of the day it will take every ounce of strength, conviction and courage to brave the trials set before them.

(A verrrry good story: good plot (like you'll get invested), good action, good pacing, and good characterization! I haven't read many fics with Lucas and Dawn and this ones just amazing. I wait patiently for its updates)

The Hand (Complete)

Summary: It was something Ingo always wondered about.

(Unexpected premise but I really like it for some reason and have reread it multiple times)

Give Not Into Sorrow (Complete)

Summary: Something strange is going on in Hisui. There are reports of a man in white roaming the wildlands while leading a pack of Pokemon . Some say they're a mix of Pokemon, some claim they're a pack of zoroarks. Some swear that the man is none other than the amnesiac warden of the Pearl Clan. One thing is certain. Those who meet the man in white all report the same thing: He is looking for his brother. And he will not rest until he finds him.

(Absolutely beautiful and heart wrenching. Deal with grief, with anger and with holding on and letting go. Drew a comic for this just yesterday too)

Conductor of Stone (Completed)

Summary: Ingo was not alone when he woke up in the region of Hisui.

There was a man next to him who shared his face. With a body as cold as ice.

Who are you?

A Land of the Lustrous au! Cool concept and excellent writing that sucks you in. This is actually part of a series which is also very good. The author, PerpetuallySleepy, is a favorite of mine too and they have a bunch of other ones shot fics I recommend checking out!

Intermittent Retention (Complete)

Summary: In theory, the space-time distortions should not overly effect Ingo's daily routine. They certainly wouldn't, if he could remember what happens after he steps inside of them. Even that could be overlooked, reluctantly, if Ingo weren't overwhelmingly drawn to them despite their amnesia-inducing properties. Or if anyone else had this problem. Something happens to Ingo when time and space break down around him, something that leaves him with fierce joy and crippling grief he cannot find a source for, and he's going to figure out what in the world is going on.

(Sweet and sad and beautiful.)

Diamond Crossing (Complete)

Summary: So, here’s the thing. Elesa’s best friend is a little…weird.

She means it in the nicest way possible. But there’s no getting around the fact that Coop is weird.

Their mood swings are all over the place, very serious at one moment and unhinged child at the next. They sprouted train facts at the drop of the hat, insisted on not only being in charge of Gear Station but taking it a step further and turning Gear Station into the Battle Subway. They’re honestly crazy for that alone.

Elesa does her modeling career on top of being a Gym Leader and a lot of people think she’s crazy. She will argue that it’s nothing compared to Coop running the entire transportation system for Nimbasa City on top of being a Battle Facility.

She adores Coop though. She really means it when she says Coop is her best friend. And no matter how crazy Coop comes across as, she knows Coop won't hurt anyone.

("Well, there are exceptions, of course," Coop says, tone serious and expression set to a frown. "We don’t allow unruly passengers for starters." They then smiled, brightening. "And anyone who makes Elesa cry will be tied to the train track and run over." )

(A super interesting concept and I love fusion aus! It's actually part of a series that are loosely connected together. Fun times galore)

Emmet wasn't scared (Complete)

Summary:

Emmet knew his brother will be alright since they were fourteen.

Or: Emmet wasn't scared when his brother went missing. He already knew he would

(Short and haunting)

[thatgirlonstage]

It's been so long since I thought about 07-Ghost and then you resurrect in the year of our lord 2024. I might have to reread it, it's been *so long*

LISTEN

I PLAYED

MYSELF

IN THE STUPIDEST

WAY

POSSIBLE

I’m doing a fandom fic alphabet bingo thing, right, except that now 9-1-1 is in the mix bc I was frothing at the mouth to turn Evan Buckley into a mermaid and I’m gonna be annoyed if I get all the letters and then there’s just an annoying 9 hanging out at the start so now it has to be alphanumerical and I straight up don’t think I have seen or read something for every NUMBER, especially going strictly on “it has to start with the numeral and Ao3 has to sort it that way.” (Eg: Re:Zero doesn’t count for 0, it counts for “R”)

So I am literally just like. Clicking around at random into ao3 categories to see what other fics already exist for certain numbers in case they might be shows I can watch to solve this problem I’ve created for myself. And I google 07-Ghost and get told “this is a sci-fi/fantasy show about a boy with amnesia” and I’m like cool, that sounds reasonably like my shit, I’ll check it out, but honestly if zero is a number I have to leave off that’s okay, I can live with that. I need to emphasize I had never in my life heard of this show. I knew nothing about it going in except what I’ve just said.

I watch the first episode and I’m like cool this seems reasonably like my shit, also, that homoeroticism with Mikage tho 👀 as long as they keep doing that it’s definitely at least worth sticking around for lmao

(At this interlude I DID see the cover of the first volume and get told what magazine it was published in so I was clued in that Certain Things Were Happening On Purpose, but still, yknow, whether or not the flavors are gonna click was still up in the air.)

I watched several more episodes.

And it ate

my damn

brain.

I don’t know if I can pinpoint the moment that first Got me but I can tell you that the moment it went from “oh no I’m obsessed” to “o h n o” was the fucking,,,,, underwater prison scene, because he SMILED and I perished and I’ll never be okay again. (I’m legally obliged to note that I fucking wept at Mikage’s death but it did have to be Frau who carried me over the line of “I am enjoying this anime” to “I need the rest of this story Fucking Immediately”)

SO THAT BY THE TIME I REACHED THE END OF THE ANIME I ALREADY KNEW I WAS GONNA HAVE TO GO BUY THE MANGA BECAUSE I NEED. TO READ THE REST OF IT.

BUT THE DAMN THING IS OUT OF PRINT

Some of the volumes are still reasonably easy to find but SOME OF THEM ARE NOT and I’ve just spent WEEKS intermittently trawling secondhand book sites waiting for someone to post vol 4 at a reasonable price because for weeks the only copies that have been available are posted for five hundred american dollars

(Thank you random eBay user who posted it for an actual normal human price to pay for a book the other night I owe you my fucking life)

(“Just read the scanlations” I’ve heard they’re not great? No idea if that’s just detritus rumors from old fandom wars or what but still, I do wanna have the physical volumes anyway)

So anyway. Hi. Hello. I’m fucking delighted to discover you know this show. Can I come scream at you about Teito and his boyfriends? They’re in love and it’s ruining my life.

Points at Evan Buckley. Somehow this is all your fault.

[pumpkinsy0]

im gonna add onto my mental/physical health master list and just straight up list the mental/medical conditions i think these mrs got cause aint no way they living life freely and i love learning about mental conditions cause that's always interesting

so in case CW for like small ED talk in case ur not in the mood for that whole shebang 

darry :autism, anxiety, depression, and eczema, uhhh that's rlly it actually, maybe he gets migraines quite a bit

pony: main ones r bpd, seasonal depression, dissociative fugue, eczema, and situs inversus (basically his fucking organs in his chest and abdomen are mirrored, like they are literally flipped than from what they're supposed to be, not dangerous or anything, he just has that), asthmatic 

soda: adhd, on the spectrum, he shows symptoms of autism but doesn't have it, seasonal depression perhaps???, 

steve: intermittent explosive disorder, basically episodes of anger, also has eczema just to give him and pony something to bond over, dissociative amnesia

dallas: oppositional defiant disorder, ptsd, 

johnny: dyspraxia, anxiety, ptsd, hard of hearing 

tim: i dont wanna say anorexia cause its not that but he’s not rlly eating bc of the circumstances he's in, not much of an appetite, autism, derealization???maybe??? and bpd

curly: autism, derealization and oppositional defiant disorder

angela: autism, bipolar disorder, what she has and what tim has are two different bipolar condition

two-bit: depression, substance abuse pretty obviously

[wetcatspellcaster]

very kindly tagged by @cursedhaglette, thank you for giving me a chance to talk about my writing :)

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

11! :)

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

lmfao. 985,659. That's nearly ten thesises (theses?) in the time of my PhD programme, so I'm going to just go quickly walk into the sea.

3) What fandoms do you write for?

the majority of my fic is for videogames with love interests and OC potential (BG3, Dragon Age) but I did briefly fall prey to the darklina disease, which I have to admit to here in order to answer some of the other questions

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1- Pieces Still Stuck in Your Teeth (bg3)

2- Party Favours (bg3)

3- A Bleeding Heart (bg3)

4- The Stars Don't Shine, They Burn (shadow and bone)

5- An Honest Lie (bg3)

5) Do you respond to comments?

as best as I can, I typically clear out a previous chapter just before I post something new (so that's one way to monitor or predict my posting activity lmfao)

6) What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Lmao. Sunblindness (shadow and bone) which takes an 'eye for an eye' approach to an amnesia AU. I actually wanted to end on a major character death but my pal's response was "jesus Emma, this is something people read for fun" so I watered it down :')))))

7) What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Party Favours currently!! Happier endings incoming, IMO.

8) Do you get hate on fics?

yes, occasionally, I'm still in single digits thankfully. i always find it so funny bc nobody is more critical of my fic than me. you think you can hurt me? babygirl, we're in the 5th dimension of insults in my brain, your surface level comment barely touches the sides.

9) Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

nope! call me the Astarion!spawn ending, the way I fade-to-black :')))))

10) Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I crossovered Stardust and Shadow and Bone, but it was not a straight crossover it was more a chewed up, swallowed, and digested version of both premises. I similarly wrote a Wintersmith/Shadow and Bone crossover that I never posted bc the sickness left me.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

lol. lmfao, even. :)))))

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have had requests made of me and given permission for that to happen, but I do not know if it was ever posted!

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, it's not for me unfortunately, I was that horrible kid in group projects who just wished she could work alone :')))))))))))

14) What’s your all time favorite ship?

honestly there are many but the two that are indelibly written on my soul are Howl/Sophie and Spike/Buffy like the simple bitch I am.

In terms of things I've written? zevran/surana, hands down.

15) What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Anything I post I will eventually finish, out of social anxiety alone. At the moment I'm worried about the stuff sitting unposted in gdocs.

16) What are your writing strengths?

hahahahahahaha i don't fucking know i think i can make character voices distinct so you can usually tell which POV I'm writing from once the perspectives are established?

I have been complimented on my dialogue.

I think I'm usually brave enough to take a risky decision, even if it doesn't pay off. These decisions also land more than they used to so it's a skill I've built with time and one I am proud of.

My jokes don't seem to just be for me anymore, I like it when other people say I made them laugh.

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

If there's something that can be said straightforwardly in a sentence, you know I'll say it in three paragraphs instead. I wouldn't be surprised if people think I'm a purple-prosed motherfucker.

Smut and lack thereof

the repeat of 'conversation, stage direction, eye contact, expression, repeat' is not a weakness but it is something I become intermittently self conscious of.

18) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I am a fan of it and I appreciate it when its done well (pour one out for Naomi Novik's fic/writing where the language work is cringingly poor), but not something I can personally do. Admirer in others, of the skills I lack.

19) First fandom you wrote for?

*dabs* Dragon Age, the OG. It was the pandemic, and I didn't want to replay Wicked Eyes Wicked Hearts bc I hate timed sections, so I wrote a fic instead.

20) Favorite fic you’ve written?

I feel bad writing this on the blog that's currently 99% BG3, but The Stars Don't Shine They Burn. It was my first time plotting something that diverged greatly from source material, and I was going through some stuff at the time that I can feel viscerally when I return to it and read the words. It is a work of personalised comfort. There's one scene in it that still gets me, every single time.

I don't know, it's funny to see Pieces get attention and I'm very, very proud of Pieces, but some of what I'm thinking through in that was in its proto-form in the other fic, which is finished and I'm really proud of it... so let's see if anything comes along to bop it off the top spot once I have a critical distance and am not in the writing trenches lol.

Tagging wise, I actually want to do an open call on this one!! this was a really pleasant exercise, so anyone seeing this who wants to talk about their writing or celebrate their achievements can take this as my personal invitation :)

scared? do it anyway x

[astarab1aze]

➥ Character Information Navigation

Asuka Kuraime - the wily harpy offspring of Crovita, they are currently undergoing study at the Zurine Mages’ University and are a talented painter. 

General Information (Fantasy)

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Golden Goose

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Crovita, Karasuka Kuraime - an effective Askarri sorcier as the Azzar’s Deathbird, and Asuka’s mother.

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Furie Night - descendent nephew to Sortia and Enfurious Night; Mauszan Oracle and cryptic werewyrm with a chip on his shoulder.

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Little Things (1)

Little Things (2)

Pet Blackwyrm

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Hydre Blanglas - the inevitable, catalyst and enactor of the apocalypse; Thousand-Head Hydra and Hand of God.

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Kaede Shikabane - just a sorcier who got the shit end of the stick his entire life; occasionally works with Crovita.

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JJK: Domain Expansion

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On Senkei…

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Loux Garo - an ambitious and seemingly shallow shapeshifter of notoriety who works closely with Sortia and Vayn, and later becomes a god.

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Brie, Athame

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Devilliers, the

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Mharra Deletholan - pissed off hermit who once served a prominent role in the Fhal'Tiran army, but is effectively a mercenary.

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Satra Shen - a mercenary fighting for Southern Yuurei's independence from the Fhal'Tir; sufferer of amnesia and intermittent memory issues blood magic can't fix.

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The Weiner Post

Travel Preferences

Traveling Mirrors

Sortia Morgana - widow to Enfurious Night and wanted murderer who works closely with Loux and Vayn; vicious sanguinaurum.

As a Fugitive…

General Information (Modern Fantasy)

General Information (Fantasy)

Little Things

Rarely Takes a Lover

Sanguinaurum

Sexual Proclivities

Vayn Morteatum - a vampire who fell from grace, of a noble house, and now lives freely alongside Loux and Sortia.

Aphrodisiacal Saliva

Cuteness Aggression

General Information (Fantasy)

General Information (Modern Fantasy)

How He Uses His Magic

Little Things

Pacifist

Viresca Mandragora - a young witch currently going through training at the Zurine Mages’ University in Zuri to become a sorcier.

Family

Family Trivia

General Information (Fantasy)

General Information (Modern Fantasy)

Personal Trivia

[thesilverlock]

Girl- your art and your OC Jey Cleary is SO GORGEOUS I CAN'T- I NEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT HIM

I know your OTP is Joey and Astral, so, I must ask, how would he behave or act around Dark Mist if he met him?? 👀👀👀

Would he hate Mist? Would he tolerate him??

And what is Joey's relationship with Eliphas and his previous obsession in reaching purity by removing all the chaos??

(( AAAAAAAA! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH! ;A;;;

THESE are also Super fantastic questions, thank you for the opportunity for me to gush about my boy and his antics with other characters 💙🩵✨ i’m so sorry this got SO long agshdj! There are doodles/art for your reading troubles down there too!))

- - ⟢〖 MIST 〗

So Jey’s whole deal is; Despite hailing from Astral World and being obligated to participate in their favor during the war ﹣ he’s actually the Son of Balance. His father, Protos, (the Heart of Astral World, as some called) was the guardian/overseer of the harmony between Chaos and Order. Before shit hit the fan in every conceivable way lmfao On top of that, Jey’s just.. a rogue and a rapscallion ahsgdhjs He never was keen on how black-&-white the war seemed, but relearning about the complete villainization of one half of a necessary energy was the final coffin nail. And that disagreeance is literally in his soul makeup! He was created in equal Chaotic Energy and Pure Energy. That balance is intermittently tied throughout him; He is meant to be the harbinger of Balance. Even Jey himself isn’t fully aware of how ingrained it is due to his own amnesia, but he does know obliterating all Chaos is not the answer, there’s something in his bones defying it. It’s a rather big plot point in his story that he starts to feel divided from the main crew because of this. Not Yuma﹣ Yuma is the only one backing Jey up at all ﹣but Astral. And it’s Astral’s rejection (spawned from the envoy's own rigid ideals and mission) that hurts Jey enough to push him out of the group for a brief period. ✨breakup arc woes✨

. . . And this is how and when Mist finds him. They make an alarming well fit duo. Their personalities mesh, and they do surprisingly? Okay? To avoid overt toxicity in their alliance? Mist doesn’t get preached at to change, or to “join a side of the war”, or be force locked in his card, so he tolerates having Jey around. And obviously Jey can’t be affected by Mist’s number influence, and he's naturally domineering enough to counteract when Mist gets too... himself lmao. Jey has a Robin Hood type of suave and charm whereas Mist acts increasingly seductive and invades people’s space because he wants to intimidate. Jey knows how to beat Mist at his own game, which both intrigues and aggravates the Number. Like two people who know one another via a friend-of-a-friend, and go on this epic journey and end up unconventionally thick as thieves like halfway through the movie. ASDFGH

Mist likes Jey’s assertiveness and darker side - the viability to resort to vicious methods and being such a rebel personality despite supposed loyalty to the world of “pure” ideals. Jey is pulled in by Mist’s unapologetic “take me or leave me” nature and his recognition of the hypocrisy regarding the war from both ends. And ofc the Number's unique brand of effortless beauty and free-bird, unaffiliated presence. Those two tend to, pretty universally, have a quick chemistry and natural connection. [ It’s also thanks to that natural connection that a certain lightbulb gets his first experiences dealing with an ‘unknown’ and green-eyed emotion. 😉 ] Also also, fun fact - if it could not already be told by these answers lol - These two are my second highest OTP, right after Goldenship (Jey x Astral /JeiAsu) ! I call them Pierceshipping. Since they have a lot of piercing qualities (particularly their affinity for bedroom-eyed stares and smirks) And because they each canonically stab someone through the chest.

I’m so sorry I ran out of space for the Eliphas portion of the question, I’ll have to return to that! ♡ ;v;

But TLDR; For a lot of the same reasons already listed here, Jey and him do not get along. Can’t always do much ‘bout it tho cause that’s their technical boss, gotta play civil or else Jey and boifren don’t get as many missions together :(

[vyragosa]

NOBODY TOUCH IVY SHE HAS INTERMITTENT AMNESIA SHE'S MADE FOR ME

[miles-harding]

Welcome to our blog.

You may call us Suit (our co-host, Dairy, primarily fronts to manage this blog)

Use they/them or it/its when referring to us; we use a combination of singular and plural pronouns but primary stick to plural for ourself.

We are a bodily adult (25+) traumagenic plural system of dissociative identities with amnesia (and I would prefer it if minors did not follow us)!

We are a white USAmerican Midwestern anti-imperialist, anti-fascist, communist (Marxist-Leninist-Maoist), and abolitionist.

We’re a Queer nonbinary butch, an antipsychiatry psychiatric abuse survivor, Hard of Hearing and intermittently-verbal autistic ASL signer; neurodivergent and physically disabled mobility device-user. We talk more about mad liberation and psych abolition on our personal blogs @starblaster and @leoriowithaknife.

Our co-host, Dairy, makes art sometimes and posts it on their art blog or Neocities site.

Fascists, anti-communists, racists, ableists, TERFs/radfems, self-identifying 'febfems' or 'vixenamorics' or 'gold star lesbians', SWERFs, TEHMs, transphobes (including nonbinary exclusionists), any and all transmisogynists (including transandro-dorks, others who think misandry is real, and people against the usage of tme/tma distinction labeling), truscum or transmeds, sysmeds or anti-endos, queerphobes and intra-community exclusionists or gatekeepers, imperialist bootlickers, Zionists, Islamophobes, antisemites, neoliberals, and other reactionary bigots alike get blocked on sight.

We block people very liberally, like if they annoy us or post a lot about things that trigger us, squick us out, or otherwise make us feel excessively uncomfortable, so don’t take it personally if we have blocked you, we just don't want to see your blog.

[perturbed-pigeon]

Fluoxetine (Prozac)

I've been on Fluoxetine for a few years now and have recently had my dosage doubled so here's an info post. The words highlighted in green are what personally effects me.

Some eating disorders and mood disorders may be treated with fluoxetine. Insomnia is more likely to occur than drowsiness. The serotonin syndrome may occur if you take fluoxetine with other medications that also release serotonin, such as tramadol, or if you overdose on fluoxetine.

Anxiety and Stress, Major Depressive Disorder, Bulimia, Depression, Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Panic Disorder, Postpartum Depression, Schizoaffective Disorder, Binge Eating Disorder, Agoraphobia, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Dysautonomia, Excoriation Disorder, Fibromyalgia, Hot Flashes, Intermittent Explosive Disorder, PANDAS Syndrome, Persistent Depressive Disorder, Premature Ejaculation, Somatoform Pain Disorder, Trichotillomania, Vulvodynia are some of the conditions this medication is used to treat.

Fluoxetine is an SSRI.

Side Effects

The most common side effects reported are; insomnia, asthenia (fatigue), and headaches.

Very Common

Headache

Somnolence (drowsiness, or the desire to sleep)

Tremor

Dizziness

Insomnia

Anxiety

Nervousness

Nausea

Diarrhea

Dry Mouth

Rhinitis (runny or itchy nose, sneezing)

Pharyngitis (sore throat)

Yawning

Asthenia (fatigue)

Anorexia

Decreased Sex Drive

Flu Syndrome

Common

Amnesia

Hyperkinesia (restlessness)

Paresthesia (a burning/prickling/numb/tingling/itching sensation that occurs on the hands, arms, legs, or feet, ect.)

Change of Taste

Abnormal Dreams

Agitation

Difficulty Paying Attention

Unstable Emotions

Hostility

Hypermania

Mania

Abnormal Thinking

Abdominal Pain

Constipation

Indigestion

Gassy-ness

Vomiting

Nosebleeds

Ear Pain

Fever

Thirst

Tinnitus

Decreased or Increased Appetite

Weight Loss

Painful Period Cramps

Erectile Dysfunction

Trouble cumming

Increased Need to Urinate

Hypertension

Abnormal Heartbeat

Rash

Sweating

Itchy Skin

Abnormal or Blurred Vision

Muscle Twitching

[adelle-ein]

engage plot thoughts

Finished Engage, here's my plot thoughts, full spoilers for entire game (my spoiler-light "full review" will be along shortlyish)

So tbh I don't think this is as bad and weak a plot as people were hyping it up to be. In theory the basic idea is actually really good! The issue is like…pacing and how the screentime was divided up. We spend wayyy too long wandering from country to country fighting bandits and then everything of significance is crammed into five chapters.

The plot tries to love its drama but fails to build things up well enough. Veyle only cameos in the early game as a generic Sweet Young Girl, so the big reveal — while it would have been predictable no matter what — just doesn't hit emotionally. Veyle in general just needed more time as a proper deuteragonist. Maybe have Veyle and Alear do a couple solo maps together? They get cornered by Corrupted and fight them off together (with Veyle using a different class and weapons of course), trying to get the player actually attached? Have Veyle hang out with the whole gang in a few longer cutscenes so she feels like part of the team and not a random aside? Maybe have Alear open up to her about Lumera so they have a special connection with her? I just wish they'd done something here. As it is, the only reason to pity Veyle is because she's a young kid being abused, and while of course that's something, she plays such a big plot role and we don't even get to know her as a person. There were definitely better ways, imo, to pull this off. Letting her join your army and leave again intermittently pre-reveal (a la Ninian, maybe) would have improved things.

Getting to the meat of the plot…I very much like that Alear is an adopted Divine Dragon and that this is treated like a good and legitimate thing, to the point of them even gaining physical characteristics of one. If we go through with a real world metaphor, then Lumera loved them enough that they became her "true" family, and that works very well. FE only really ever does found family stuff with its side characters, preferring to focus on Divine True Sacred Bloodlines, and having Alear as a Fell Dragon who became Divine through the power of love and wanting to be "a good dragon" is actually quite nice and helps them feel a little less like a Robin retread. The issue that is unfortunately there is effectively zero buildup to this revelation. Other than Veyle's sibling obviously being Alear, we see no connection between them and Sombron. Alear has a single flashback to 1000 years ago in an early chapter and never again until the reveals start being dropped…in the last handful of chapters. While the single time travel chapter is kinda bizarre, it's a good step from a character perspective, and I wish there was more of that. Why not show more of how they became close to Lumera and how she adopted them? When did they defect, how did that go for then, how did they start calling her their mother? Interspersing flashbacks or hell, even more time travel (as silly as it would have been) throughout the story would have fixed so much of this game's lacking emotional core and let the plot actually work. As it is, it's a good concept that we see barely anything of.

I do disagree with the people insisting that Alear shouldn't have been so upset when Lumera died because they barely know her — they barely know anyone, Lumera has been kind to them and they know she's their mother, they're mourning the possibility of what they lost as much as the actual loss. I dunno, obviously I've never been in that situation, but even if I barely remembered my mother due to total amnesia I think I would still be really upset if she was murdered in front of me and especially if she had died due to using up all her health and strength to protect me. Personally. Feels a bit silly to be defending something like this but yeah. Now I do think her death scene was a bit long and dramatic when a quick sudden death is pretty much always more emotionally effecting, but that's a separate issue. Regardless, the plot hinges so much on Lumera and her relationship with Alear, and we see hardly any of it for some reason. Lumera simply needed a lot more screentime, even posthumously. Hell, let her live for the first half or so of the game, THEN get killed off. It still would have been predictable, but at least we would have gotten to know her.

Alear as the thirteenth Emblem makes sense in a meta way, but it does make me wish that they provided SOME kind of lore as to why and how the Emblems exist. The implication seems to be that the Emblems were created in death separate from their bodies, or when their bodies were already gone? And that all of their worlds exist out there, with Sombron intending to invade them? At the very last minute Marth drops a "btw Emblems are not the same as the actual heroes" but that's pretty much all we get. Idk I'm not looking for a Zelda timeline for all the FE games, I would just like…some kind of lore explanation as to what is up with Emblems and creating new ones. As well as the idea of the new protagonist joining the old ones as an Emblem works on a meta level, we just kinda needed more lore and buildup to make it work. My usual refrain. Personally liked the idea that Elyos was created *by* the rings or is somehow linked to them, because of the way its lore feels like a mashup and homage to so many previous games but…that probably wasn't the intention. Who knows. Fire Emblem. I like that our protagonist *is* the literal Fire Emblem though. Last time it was their *waves hand* blood power, now it's just straight up them.

The Four Hounds show up way too often and only do things in their last few appearances, which is tiring. Constructing them to be semi-likeable from the beginning, and maybe not fighting them and having them easily walk away just fine over and over, would have really improved everything with that subplot. I see what the writers were going for. But they whiffed it.

Alear is fine. They are kinda forgettable and a total dumbass for the first half of the plot, but they do change and grow and become more assertive, which works. They are an actual character, unlike Byleth. And they don't do stupid awful sometimes-evil things and get patted on the back for them a la Corrin. That is all I ask really.

Basically, a mess, but better pacing with more screentime for Veyle and Lumera and more flashbacks on Alear's end could have made it a really nice mess. Alas. I do think, overall, this was a simple but good and heartfelt concept for a plot. The execution was just poor, as usual for FE, and because the plot is so simple it can't hide what a mess it is the way other FE games often do. But I like it better than SOV (I like cat food commercials better than SOV…)

[justformeteehee2]

that last post i wrote on september 8th. but i have been having severe intermittent dissociative breaks of some kind where i now have complete amnesia. but my gf has been there each time i've been in this state.

the "break" occurs preluded by a panic attack like occurrence that i can remember only if i successfully quash the quiet but repetitive voice asking me to let go. it feels like im fighting with something or there is something horrible about to happen.

i only know what my gf has told me as i have so far no memory of the ~9 times this has happened for more than 5 minutes. but when it lasts longer, i stay that way until i apparently sleep through the night. she says i behave and act and indicate that i am 10 years old (or less there have been times where i am more confused and emotionally volatile and acting younger than that so it might vary not sure) and really weirdly that i dont remember anything since i was that age in real life at least a decade ago.

like she's been explaining all these events that this me doesnt remember and this me didnt know most of the music i love now and. ?? i m just kind of freaked out because thats not just age regression and i dont even know what it could be?

[emma-whoisleft]

AU: Amnesia Verse | this is the last time you tell me I've got it wrong | secret dating era

I need a personal day, is what Emma told the office that morning.

She could have said I have a 101 degree fever or I can't keep down solid foods or even, just plainly: I'm under the weather and need a sick day. But Emma preferred the straightforward simplicity of a personal day.

That way, if anyone asked what she'd been up to, she was well within her rights to fix them with a cold stare and say: That's personal.

Her runny red nose, bloodshot eyes, and spiking fever were high on her list of blame. But even feverish as she was, even Emma couldn't deny—try though she had—that her pride was the number one thing keeping her home today. So allergic to pity and perceived weaknesses as she was, Emma didn't want to be seen at less than her best. Especially not at work.

Also? She was fucking freezing.

No, that's not right. Maybe she was warm?

Suddenly, actually, she was sweltering.

With a little groan of frustration, Emma kicked her blankets away. Then landed on the floor in front of the couch—her throne for the day, surrounded by newspapers that she couldn't read because of her headache and the singular, pathetic sleeve of saltines she intermittently tried to make herself want. They were the only food to be found in her kitchen.

Apparently, it wasn't just the flat's decor—even the contents of the cupboards were minimalist bordering on sterile. Everything there was nice. The countertops were nice and the neighborhood was nice and the decor was nice. It had all the charm of a hotel suite.

Even if she had been properly living in it—that is, if she hadn't spent the previous long weekend escaping with (and to) Davey, the place still would not look properly lived in.

Plus, Davey's place had a telephone. Emma was in no such luck; had never had the inclination nor need to get one of her own. She'd never even given it a second thought. That just made it all the more devastating to discover that the half-stale saltines were her one and only option, besides venturing into the outside world—which wasn't an option at all.

Two mornings ago, Emma woke up in Davey's bed. She'd lingered until the morning threatened to become the afternoon; indulged in breakfast a la Davéy and split the Sunday newspaper with him.

She had been heading out the door with her usual mantra on her lips—this is the last time—when Davey rolled his eyes and just...kissed her. Kissed her recklessly, and well, and in a way that would be difficult to forget even if she wanted to.

Increasingly, she found she didn't want to. Forget, that is.

In fact, it had been the only thing she could think about—until the onslaught of stuffiness and phlegm and puffy eyes swept in. At least it made for an effective distraction. Can't think about Davey when I'm too sick to think about anything.

They hadn't spoken since she left his apartment. She'd been off the grid for the bank holiday yesterday—scheduled to meet Lucinda for a long and boozy lunch, but relegated instead to feeling more and more ill by the hour.

After a fitful night of "sleep" and her early-morning notice to Hamish that she'd be out for capital-p Personal, capital-p Private reasons (not that he'd pressed her for details), now here she was. In her barebones flat, caught in a coughing fit, with no Chinese food and no access to her work and —

Emma looked up, confused and a little skeptical, when she heard a knock at the door.

Was it possible that she...magically willed a food delivery? Was she just so feverish that she was straight-up hallucinating now?

Slowly, Emma peeled herself off the couch and made her way over to the door. Everything ached, even though she was wearing the single most comfortable items of clothing to be found in her drawers: a canary yellow Hufflepuff Quidditch jersey, a pair of winter socks, end of list. She didn't even want to know what her hair looked like.

Finally reaching the door (it had been years, she'd swear it), Emma lifted up the peephole to see what awaited in the hallway. Blinking with surprise, Emma was already reaching to unlock the chain when she realized it was Davey. Not just Davey, but Davey looking......moderately to severely put out about something.

Was work even over for the day? No chance. A quick glance at the clock on the wall confirmed her suspicion; it was three in the afternoon, too late for lunch and too early to be finished.

"Davey? Hello," Emma said as she finally managed to get the door unlocked. She squinted against the harsh corridor lighing, searching Davey's unfamiliar expression for any clues. "Is there some sort of DOMGAS emergency I should be bracing for?"

@savingdavey