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The Forgotten Daughter
well I finally did it.
first of all merry christmas and enjoy the chapter
Dear family
This may be sudden... I don't even know why I'm writing this letter anymore, it was supposed to be about the big decision I made that would change my life, but even so I don't know why I'm leaving explanations.
My plan was always to never see you again, each of you, I still feel very hurt by everything, although I know that these words will not make a big change in you.
But enough berating them, I'm not racking my brain to find the right words for a letter full of complaints.
I was always a girl who avoided problems or at least I like to think I was, Father, brothers and my dear confidant Alfred, despite getting into big trouble.
The lights were flashing brightly, the music at full volume filled the room, it was very hot due to the sweat that all the bodies were emanating, you watched all the visitors of the club go crazy with euphoria after a few drinks and continued with a long list of crazy things, you On the contrary, you decided that it was one of those depressive days, where you spent your time seeing the bad side of everything and being miserable.
You didn't follow your friends to any of their craziness; on the contrary, you stayed in a place at the bar away from everyone, along with a few glasses full of a low-grade cherry-flavored liquor.
You still taste the light cherry flavor on your palate. There were so many liquors on the shelf, many of different sizes, appearances, names, years and strengths, you wondered if anyone ever drank them all, if there was a person who in his miserable, boring, short life provokes every liquor on the restaurant's menu. bar.
You looked away when you heard the sound of a chair being moved, you saw a man taller than yours, with a somewhat abrupt but attractive appearance. You took another sip from your glass and returned to your thoughts as you watched the people on the dance floor doing stupid things.
Or so you tried, but by discreetly observing the actions of the man near your seat, it was enough to capture your full attention, to what that guy does in his notebook with his pencil.
“What an artist,” you addressed the subject sitting one seat away from you, “what are you doing in a place as crazy as this?” You turned your gaze to the man with blue-black hair, as you watched him take a sip of his drink and draw with his pencil.
Their eyes connected when the man decided to leave his world and pay attention to your beginning of interaction, he couldn't look away in time, although you didn't blame him, you did the same before because of the curiosity you felt when he saw him, you felt like everything was coming together.
He paused, just him and you, as if the two of you were the only ones in a large room of strangers.
A smile left your lips when you saw the man's dazed attitude, he was so lost in himself that it seems that he forgot about your beginning of conversation until a moment later.
Still, you were afraid that it wasn't nerves that the man was feeling but anger or annoyance at your interaction with him.
“Even if you don't believe it, inspiration can be found in unlikely places… Or even sometimes a muse” came those calm words from his thick but reassuring and animated voice.
You were relieved to hear him speak, but those words that had no sign of annoyance or complaints.
“uhh it's like that... I only saw this place as a garbage dump full of vices” you didn't know how you were still trying to maintain an interaction with that person, perhaps prolonging the feeling of company instead of the one of loneliness sounded more attractive.
“You should look at it from other perspectives, so you'll find things like this” you saw him tear a page out of his notebook without blinking and put it on your forehead.
You were surprised to see your drawing on the paper. Every feature of yours delicately captured with each stroke of the pencil on the paper.
“wow you left me speechless for a moment” you disconnected your gaze from the sheet you had in your hands.
“You are actually a great artist” the drawing was extremely beautiful, you never considered yourself a very beautiful woman, it was common for you to see all your flaws before your best qualities, seeing that paper where you felt that in that drawing you were perfect caused you a feeling emotion and a passing confidence.
However, you couldn't get it out of your head to see yourself drawn in other ways on paper, like a cartoon or Japanese version of yourself; before this moment, you never even had the chance to sit on a bench and wait for an artist to draw you. .
“What's wrong with that face, you look disappointed, maybe you're kidding me” you heard him joke.
“No no… no… on the contrary, I really like it” you quickly defended yourself, afraid of offending the man.
“It's just that..” you felt shy when explaining your reasons, especially when he had an attentive gaze on you.
You saw his eyes wait expectantly for your words.
“You know, the drawing is beautiful, but… even though it sounds silly, I wish I could see myself more in a cartoon or comic” you laughed nervously, after your babbling.
“ahh, are you a comic book lover or something?”
“Yes, well it's something like that” you liked to read some series in comic magazines from time to time, but you preferred mangas, you hid this preference, you weren't going to receive a few words of displeasure for that or start a debate about what genre it was.
Better, much less explain what they were if I didn't know what you were referring to.
“I think I can fix that,” the guy said with an animated and funny voice.
You watched him, fascinated, by how he held his book with enthusiasm, his hands moved quickly from one side to the other on the white sheet, the pencil was handled quickly, you could tell that he had a lot of experience with the ease with which he did it.
It was a long night, between different conversations and laughter with the new guy you met, the night became more tolerable with the man by your side.
Between drinks and meaningless talks, laughter on both sides, silly dances on the floor full of people, just two fools doing the most pathetic steps they had plus some little improvised old waltzes, it ended in a new day with two sleepless but falices talking in a viewpoint of a building that showed the entire city.
Oh, father, you don't know how enchanted I was with that man I met on one of my many outings to parties, I was stupid and childish, but I still allowed myself to dream and love.
You didn't expect to meet again with such a man with whom you managed to connect, but that's how it happened, destiny somehow led them to meet.
You liked having a new person in your circle, with whom you managed to get along so well.
From talking about his work as an artist, giving his opinion on different comics and mangas that they knew, talking about animation to becoming hoarse from speaking with so much emotion and passion with long monologues.
They visited many hidden places in the big city in their days of adventures, even if they were alleys that were not very crowded, now that you think about it, such a careless action was very crazy, but the beautiful places, with new views, like an alley full of colorful fabrics and with different designs that hung over the street, the walls of a neighborhood full of drawings with different artistic techniques, but with many bright colors, the tall buildings that showed views of the entire city.
The days of movies with crazy plots, but that had you glued to the screen to see what happened next.
The rare meals from the carts or street stalls, which they consumed without problems while they sat to observe the lights of the city or the dark sky, accompanied by silence, but the two of them together.
In that moment where the two were together and talking, you felt that they were exchanging many words of great importance to both of them, but seen from other perspectives they were nothing more than insignificant.
That's what love did, right?
And all for one crazy night where you hope to go crazy on alcohol, after sinking into a self-compose for your life.
You will never be able to forget when he gave you his name and you gave him yours... well, half of it, you admit to having lied to him, even if you regretted it, you already knew the problems they would bring you later.
Well at least that's what you thought, you had no idea of the true consequences.
You only thought about the fear of telling him your real last name, that he would look for you and know who you really were, you were afraid that he would see you differently, no longer a strange girl he met in a bar, but the daughter of a millionaire with a history. questionable life, the mere thought of him using you was too much.
So you avoided him by mentioning the amazing last name “Wayne” and mentioning a fake one.
More specifically, that of your false identification, something crazy that you did in your wild adolescence was left to be useful in your future, that false identification that you made with your friends from school to visit different clubs, you used it when you became independent, so that no one It will bother you in your new life.
“_____ , _____ Jones” unsurely you stated your name, you still remember when you made the false identifications with your friends and among all of them you were looking for a new name and surname for the others, you kept your name and they gave you the last name of the protagonist of the book of fashionable at the time because of the film that adapted the story.
A mental chuckle caused you to remember this along with the taunts they threw at you about where your diary was.
“Kayle, Kyle Rayner,” the boy smiled as he introduced himself.
You followed his smile, something in his ended up infecting you. Just two fools in a bar telling each other their names and being ignorantly happy.
It's a shame that that happiness ended some time later, when you never saw Kyle again. Even with a card for him to contact you, you never heard from him.
You woke up happy, in his apartment, the day after spending a night together, alone, without any sign that the man was home, without any note or notice, you waited excitedly for him to return, but he never did, even when you left a message. letter and ways for me to contact you again if the ones they already had didn't work, you never knew anything.
Maybe it was all an adventure and you got carried away... they never clarified what they were, hell maybe he didn't even consider you a friend.
But you and I know, father, that all the fairy tales one creates end quickly, most of the time in the worst ways.
I ended up with a broken heart, still, I kept good memories... and her.
I know it is late, very late, as it has been for many years, but I must confess it, because no parents and siblings would want to know it in the worst possible ways….
Alice Wayne, my dear baby….
You leaned back in your chair as you wrote the last sentence, you did it, you wrote what was overwhelming you so much, the beginning of the letter.
Your eyes burned, a few treacherous tears running down your face.
Your family, your passing love and your beloved daughter always made you sensitive.
It wasn't something you could avoid.
You leaned your head on the headboard of the chair, letting all the blood flow to your head, something strange you used to do to clear your head, you looked at the ceiling and the walls around you upside down.
You noticed the crib on the side of the room near your desk where you were writing.
You saw your baby sleeping calmly, a peaceful face with no signs of discomfort, he was an angel.
Your little angel, and your light... you knew you would do anything for her, like you did right now.
I think if we are similar in some way father.
I ended up having a daughter through carelessness like you did to me.
I need to ask you a big favor father and not only of you but also of the whole family, the biggest and most important one I will do in my life.
If something happens to me... if I end up in big trouble or I no longer exist, any situation that prevents me from taking care of my beloved daughter.
Please watch over her.
Make sure she has the best future, a happy life with everything she needs, that she can grow up as a girl full of light, that she is always kind, wise and with a loving family.
If that's not something they can give you, find someone who can give it to you.
Take care of my treasure, my only happiness, my only family... I know I left a long time ago without saying anything and returned in a hurry to their lives.
Maybe one day they will call me selfish knowing the path I took to leave little Alice to them, the decision I decided to make was not easy, but I did it because I want the best for my little light.
We are all selfish and mean, I was all my life, since I knew that my happiness only depended on me, that I was alone in this world, that only oneself can save oneself.
I think I still am by thinking that I can force them to do something about my problem, I can't force them to take care of someone or take responsibility for a short period of time, turning their lives upside down.
But maybe... with all the love and affection that you could ever see felt for me, I can make you consider helping me and fulfilling my difficult request.
Father, brothers and Alfred... I never said it because of all the anger I felt, because of everything that happened in the mansion, which devastated my thoughts with a lot of anger, forgetting everything I had and made me have a comfortable and pampered life.
Thank you.
Well, he's the father and maybe a future yandere, it's a possibility.
after an exhaustive investigation into possible characters to occupy this role in the series.
although there may be other possibilities with other characters....
Like I tried with the penguin's son, if ___ had decided to hang out more with villains and they adopted her or became her godparents.
Tag list: @kore-of-the-underworld @vanessa-boo @jsprien213 @delias-stuff @vanilliona @bat1212 @yanrandom @Quiarst @palabra de niño salvaje @el termino @leo227 @sirenethblog @ masa para galletas @blueberry19000 @con seguridad
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An Animalistic Disaster
Chapter 28 : Final decision
Masterlist
Summery :Where Alastor tries to persuade you but fails miserably
A.n : A lot of this chapter is inspired by a song. Try to guess which one it is before reaching the end !!
" What the fuck?!"
Safe to say that almost everyone lost their shit looking at Melody for an explanation. Melody laughed nervously shying away a bit under their gaze. She didn't think this would have this much impact.
" So uh...you remember your birthday right? Your mom said she would be happy if you spent that day with her."
" Uh-huh...and?"
" And that they think they found a suitable match for you. Apparently it's someone you know" she scratched her chin. " I couldn't hear the name properly. I think it was...... something!"
" And they think I'll just accept that proposal in the blink? What are they thinking? What is my MOM thinking?!" You slammed on top of the floor angrily. You didn't care if it hurt your hand or not. Out of everyone, you didn't expect your mom to agree to something like this. This felt like betrayal.
" (Y/n)....are you..are you okay? " Charlie asked in a concerned voice extending one of her hands towards you. You gave her a weak nod and smiled before hardening the features. " It's fine, I'll just say I don't agree to this. They can't force me to marry someone. That's against the law." You said in a monotone tone.
It's true while your mother has always poked at you to settle down, she never outwardly forced you to be with someone. She always said that you were becoming a big girl and maybe someone by your side would do you good instead of being alone. A mother's worries.
But this new development. This has to be the work of your dad's side. Especially your grandma. Even your dad didn't dare cross your grandma. From outside, your dad was the main person of the household, but in actuality, it was your grandma. You learnt it the hard way. She was mostly to blame for the person your father became today. You used to go her for comfort from your dad. You thought your sweet sounding grandma understood you. Until you realized she blamed YOU for every time you cried to her about unfairness from your dad, not her child. You lost another person dear to you that day, and never sought her out ever again.
You snapped back to reality suddenly to sound of arguments and planning. All of the crew were arguing and talking over each other on how to prevent it. You sighed slowly standing up and going outside. You needed some fresh air. A pair of brown eyes followed your every move.
*Step* *step*
You took off your shoes a bit earlier. Moon didn't shine today. The sky looked cloudy. Cool breeze were flowing through the air making swoosh sounds around the tall trees circling the place. It might rain soon. The air felt misty. The grass beneath your feet felt pleasant as well. You could slowly feel your thoughts drifting by. ' Marriage huh? This isn't the first time I've heard that being brought up...damned dad..this is all his fault! I know it!'
You looked down at the pond as your own reflection stared back at you . suddenly another face joined besides yours in the reflection. Being spooked, you quickly whipped your head towards Alastor who was grinning with his hands behind his back. God your heart was pounding.
" Are you alright my dear?" Alastor's honey toned voice rang through the air. " I do hope you weren't hoping to jump in the pond and be done with, that would quite... disastrous!" He laughed, this bastard laughed while you were concerned for your future. " Well fortunately for you, I wasn't going to. But I will now. So if you'll excuse me, I have a pond to sink into and when I die it's going to be your fault ."
You huffed extending your feet to step into the pond angrily. You had enough of this man. Common sense left your head under all the frustration. Before the water could touch your feet you were yanked back into Alastor's broad chest. While you were trying to figure out what's happening, he held your hand and spun you around. You couldn't even comprehend or move away from his grip. Finally he dipped you low enough for your hair to almost touch the water surface as you gripped onto him tightly in fear of falling. Alastor leaned closer to your neck, breathing in your scent. You smelled intoxicating.
"My dear, how about a proposal ~? "
You furrowed your eyebrows. A proposal? Whatever was he planning. And this pose...it has your heart running as fast a lighting. You looked up at his brown eyes, scanning for any sign that could possibly reveal just what he was planning. You found none.
" I think you could use a....friend in this time of need. Or a partner if you'd prefer"
Alastor was trying to choose his words carefully while scanning your face for expressions.
" Why...?"
" Why to save you from that dreadful dad of yours of course! Someone like him would be just better dead! Don't you think so?"
Panic rushed through your mind at what he was suggesting towards. You pushed him away, breaking out of his clutch easily and hugged your arms. "No! I'm not killing my father if that's what you're planning Alastor! I'm not that far gone like you. "
Alastor takes a slight offend to that. But his grin never falters. Instead he steps closer now with his arms behind his beck. His form easily towered over you forcing you to look up. " Come one dear, just a tini tiny deal, with the one you fancy the most~". He was trying to use your attraction for him as a tool. He was your favourite after all, wasn't he? No matter what that picture box or the king of hell did, they could never replace him!
He began to circle you now, like a predator circling its prey. The wind was getting even stronger making your clothes and hair flow and you could swear that you saw shadows dancing around you. Before you knew it, he was right behind you, whispering in a deep husky voice. Wait, was that...his southern accent?
You were blushing like crazy. He was using all your weaknesses against you. The closeness, his accent, the height difference. You could almost see the fluffy ears on top of his head flickering as well. You took a deep breath. You knew he wouldn't harm you. At least not while Charlie and others were present. But since you liked him, you knew enough about him to know that he is most probably using you for his entertainment. Oh well, you'll play his game for a bit. He didn't take you for a easy catch did he?
A smirk graced your lips as you turned around and lifted up on your tip toes. The first technique to throw him off the game was to get as close as possible. This guy loved getting in others personal bubble. But someone getting into his? Not so much. And it was working as you saw him back away his face a little.
" Say, If I did get my father killed, how do I know it won't come back to bite me later? How do I know you won't do a half assed job that'll get me and all the others arrested? " You poked a finger at his chest. "You sir, may have been a well-known serial killer before but times have changed, there are a whole lot more technologies and camera here now mister, that I bet your old timey ass never bothered to look into"
Alastor was effectively silenced. This was very very rare. 'Damn woman...' His ears were pinned back to his head which didn't escape your eyes. You found them cute. The fact that you were able to get under his skin so easily made you puff out your chest with a victory smirk.
"C'mon! Just give me one chance cher. Times may have changed but my skills hadn't gone that rusty yet. I can handle it and serve his head in a silver platter for you. All I require is your dear soul. Don't you want to be closer to me? " This man was literally purring in your ear.
" Listen, I'll have you know, just cause I like you, doesn't make me a easy prey. I can tell what's good for me or not. I've been swimming with piranhas all my life, now, I don't need a shark like you coming after me."
"I'm actually a deer. That picture box is the shark."
" You know what I meant smartass "
Alastor's lips curled into a smirk. Intriguing, quite intriguing indeed . He should have guessed that it wouldn't be this easy. " But don't you see, this is once in a lifetime offer! Cher, just give me your words" he suddenly grasped your hands pressing them against his chest. His eyes shined with a strong affection and determination. You gazed into his brown eyes suddenly shocked with this change.
Before you could utter anything, Charlie and Husk called your name. Alastor's brows furrowed with annoyance looking at the pair. Suddenly you were snatched away from Alastor and placed into Husk's chest who then shoved you to on top of Charlie.
" Listen here motherfucker. You may have tricked me and Charlie, but I ain't letting you trick (Y/n) too " He declared angrily flaring his nostrils. Husk's tail was all puffed up behind him angrily as he made a low hissing sound. Meanwhile Charlie was just checking up on you to see if you're okay. They heard the last few bits of talks between you two. While Charlie was more caught up with the fact of how Alastor and you were holding hands and seemed so close. You two didn't do something right? Only if she noticed a little sooner.
Alastor wasn't bothered at all by the things Husk was threatening him with, but more so at the fact that he and Charlie dared ruin his moment. He was so close to making you convinced. Spoiler alert, he wasn't. Alastor suddenly grabbed both Husk and Charlie by their collar and pulled them up close placing a hand on both of their shoulders.
" Husk and Charlie! My dears! You both came at the perfect time! Won't you put in a few good words about me to our dearest host here?"
Husk looked pissed while Charlie just looked baffled. But before they could say something, they felt their lips move on their own.
" Oh yes, Alastor helped me a lott" you heard Charlie say, except it was actually Alastor's who was mimicking Charlie's voice in a high pitch and moving her lips accordingly somehow. Their lips were darker then usual. It was the shadows that moved around Alastor. Soon enough Husk's lips started moving as well.
" Seelling my soul was the best thing I ever did kid ! Trust in this old kitty cat and make a deal with the handsome devil while you can !"
Once again it was Alastor's voice mimicking Husk's with a gruff tone in them. Alastor even pulled up his cheek a little to make the poor man copy the expression of a smile. You would have laughed if it wasn't apparent on his face of how much he hated every second of that.
" How are you doing that Al? " You asked with barely muffled laughter. Alastor's grin became ten times more bigger looking at your smile. He let go of the two making them cough immediately and rub their mouth to make the uncomfortable cold sensation of the shadows go away.
" What the fuck-"
" THAT my dear..." Alastor's booming voice cut through the Husk's as he took your hands in his once again. " Was simply an ounce of my power~ " Suddenly the shadows you saw around him made sense. " But I thought only Vaggie, Charlie and Lucifer had powers..." This bastard hid it didn't he?
You noticed in between tugging and dancing and spinning around, you both came around the lake side again. " Now then, cher~? What do you say? Do we have a deal ? " Alastor came far to close to your liking again, inhaling your scent with a blissful look on his face.
"I think...."
Alastor's smile widened parting his teeth over your neck. His breath ghosting over the skin.
" I'm going to...."
His teeth grazed your skin. You heartbeat increased rapidly.
" Have to decline! "
Alastor's eyes widened, did he just hear that correctly? But even before he could come in terms with what he heard he was suddenly pushed to the side.
*Splash*
Charlie and Husk watched in horror as Alastor was pushed into the lake by you. You wore a smirk of pride and held no regrets to what you just did. Charlie quickly ran up to you and held your shoulders while looking down at the lake in horror as Alastor face emerged from the water and shook it off .
" (Y/n) Why would you do that! "
" What? He was annoying me, plus it's not like he's dead! Consider it payback for what he did to me before. " You shrugged looking away. " My dad wants a good little daughter huh? I'll show him what a good little daughter I can be." You chewed out your words. "And I don't need his help to do it. Charlie? Husk?" You looked at the two with a smile on your lips that promised mischief.
" I think we three can handle it ourselves, don'tcha think so?" You ruffled their hair in both hands. " With Husk's tricks and Charlie's power, this thing will be easy. " Suddenly rain started pouring soaking You three all together. The wind was much faster as well. There was going to be a storm tonight. Perfect, just the weather for your current mood. You were laughing like a mad woman as they both escorted you to the cabin worryingly.
*Floosh* *splash*
Alastor coughed as he sat back the shore. His ears were pinned back to his head as he shivered at the cold. Each drop of rainwater felt almost like a cold bullet. He took off his glasses and shook his head. It didn't do much to dry his head but it pushed away all the leaves and other stuff from on top of his head. He felt disgusting. He started growling in anger, ears pinned behind his head. ' Oh I'm going to strangle that girl in her sleep I swear- '
" Need a hand old friend ? "
He immediately swiped his head back. This lousy picture box was here. This damned shark head. Scowling, he stood up and tried to figure out just how much of that he saw.
" If you're looking for others, they already headed back inside."
Two of them stood there as rain continued to fall over their heads. " What are you doing outside exactly Vox? Did you come here just to mock me is it?" Alastor grin tightened around the hinges, almost biting into his lips now trying to keep his smile up.
" Alastor, I have a deal to make a with you, a proposal if you will "
" And what makes you think I would accept? "
" Oh I think you will "
Vox took a few steps closer to him. Alastor honey coloured eyes calculating his every move.
" It about (Y/n)'s engagement "
Somewhere a thunder fell, illuminating the entire night sky as a tree fell.
.
.
.
.
Several footsteps approached, crunching the wet leaves bellow. Flashlight shot through the dark, showing the way though a dark wood.
" I don't think we're going to find anything anymore. Let's just go home. It's getting late, my sweet wife is waiting for me."
The one in front scoffed. This new guy just came a few weeks ago and already lazing around more then the older officers. He will need to give him some more training later. He clearly forgot who he was working under with. He couldn't began to fathom how he can just relax and talk about going home so nonchalantly as if there wasn't a killer on loose.
" Plus it's been weeks till the last murder. Maybe the killer is done...... Sir ? Are you listeni-"
Suddenly the man in front steeped on something...soft. He wasn't stepping on the ground anymore. In a second his flashlight pointed to the ground with several others soon following.
" We have a new body.."
A.n : Heyyyyyyyy, yeah. So, I'm not dead, but I'm about to die from all these studies -
And so, the song in question was " say my name " from bettlejuice. I had this scene envisioned in my mind for months and now I can finally write it. This songs covers Alastor and reader's relationship quite a lot as well.
And now as always, stay tuned~
Tag list: @legostars @glowinthedarkbones1150 @darifes @aria-tempest @rainbowcake1212 @luxylucylou @aaliy89 @uniquecutie-puffs
#hazbin hotel#alastor x reader#hazbin hotel x reader#Charlie x reader#vaggie x reader#angel dust x reader#husk x reader#sir pentious x reader#cherri bomb x reader#vox x reader#human Alastor#human charlie#human Vaggie#human angel dust
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#not saying consent and self control shouldnt be valued#because fuck yes they should be #but it completely destroys what their characters are supposed to be #and totally destroys the concept of a sin
Sins Being Neutered By People Who Don't Understand Sins
The embodiment of lust caring about consent and the embodiment of gluttony caring about self-control is the adult equivalent of this.
#helluva boss#negative#spiritual#fr it's so freaking jarring#Ozzy caring about consent could MAYBE be explained as more people experiencing lust = better for him#instead of just one making another person miserable#if everyone is feeling lust then it increases the energy he feeds off#but Bee seemingly caring about someone partying TOO hard? bro. she's GLUTTONY#partying too hard is kind of Gluttony's THING#again you might explain it as Blitzo giving off rancid vibes at the party and contaminating the flavor of the energy by disturbing the vibe#but i highly doubt he was the only one going to the party to drown his sorrows in booze and sex#that he was the only one covering up his problems with overindulgence#so why is it only ''bad'' when he does it?#make it make sense#seriously that's all i'm asking#internal fucking consistency#religion is not a cool edgy ~aesthetic~ you can pick and choose from like a buffet table#if you are going to set your raunchy edgy black comedy in Literal Hell:tm:#you should at LEAST do the legwork to portray the concepts you're co-opting accurately and have them ACT accordingly#Lust isn't just about sex it's an all consuming desire for something like power or violence#it's about seeing others as objects to use for your own gratification or advancement. it's not seeing them as PEOPLE.#gluttony is more than eating a lot it's about overindulging to the point of excessive wastefulness#harming yourself by your overindulgence but also harming others through over-consumption#by making your characters the embodiment of these vices instead of just naming them after them#you are shooting yourself in the foot if you make them act counterintuitive to their natures#like making Poseidon afraid of water or horses it just doesn't work
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I don't see the issue in believing that your alters are multiple people or not, but saying that it's "anti recovery" to believe that they are is genuinely one of the most idiotic things i've heard. i don't see why it's a problem? i know so many systems who consider themselves multiple people, who are doing perfectly fine in healing, without needing to see themselves as just "multiple parts of one person". Alters can be so completely complex, they can be so different that you'd genuinely see them as completely different people, because they are different people to that system. This is coming from a plural who sees their parts more as just different parts of themself, by the way. Believing your alters are just multiple parts of one identity is completely fine, but claiming that it's "anti recovery" for others to believe that they're multiple people is one of the shittest things you could do. Just let people do what they want, there isn't anything wrong with that? I definitely see that systems can quite literally have what is basically multiple fully formed identities, fully formed people.
.
#our system despises the “parts of one person” bullshit antis like to spew to invalidate other systems#how another system views its headmates has nothing to do with them#i wish someone would tell us we're encouraging dissociation by seeing ourselves as separated individuals#like we will go off#mind your own damn system and not everyone else's for fuck's sake#hhm i usually see those “parts of one person” people talking about how miserable being a system is#maybe if they treated their headmates like people instead of pieces of people they wouldn't be so damn miserable just saying#i mean if saw myself as a person and some other headmate in my system kept trying to push that#im a broken piece of one person i would raise literal hell and make them hate life until they respect me#again antis need to quit saying what is recovery and what isn't#like shut up you're not the police of how systems work#pluralgang#pluralpunk#endo friendly#plural community#plurality#pro endo#mixed origin system#traumaendo#endogenic safe
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*sigh*
another year of being stuck at home instead of having a normal life :(
#not by choice#unfortunately#i would much rather be around other people than be alone and stressed 24/7#still haven't ever gone to a Halloween party#or even just gone out to a club or something#its fucking miserable dude#another year of my 20s that I'll never get back#i really just want at least one person in my life that actually wants me in theirs too#but at this point I'm doubting that will ever happen#idk why anyone would willingly choose this shit#but thats a conversation for another day#everyday i wish i could go back in time and make friends while i was in school#not that i didn't try#but i missed pretty much all of highschool#was too mentally ill to handle going#had to be “homeschooled” instead#also got mislabeled as autistic by my mom so she could get a social security check every month#which is what started my chronic social isolation in the first place#no one wanted anything to do with me#i was forced into downsized sped classes that i never actually needed to be in#all of my options for friends were kids who were 4-5 years younger than me developmentally#who i had nothing in common with and who did not understand half of whatever i said#now here i am almost 20 years later#completely fucking alone#all for a whopping $650 a month#and free sympathy from whoever she complained about me to
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Shit's happening again yet again back at home, my baby sister was telling me about it, and that is stressing me out.
#one day they can't go ONE fucking DAY without a fight or discussion or sabotage or paranoia of sabotage or etc etc#like literally no one can have one fucking good thing my father always has to spoil it because he's eternally miserable#or my mother has to belittle or take it over and distort it because she has to make it about herself#this is yet another reason why I have to cut off conversation with them eventually#but I just feel so sorry for my baby sister she was supposed to be having fun in her math olympics field trip#and instead she's feeling anxious because our parents are fighting each other over the fact my mother decided to go along#and there was this issue with the food bill that the school supposedly promised to pay her for but didn't#gaaaahhhhh#personal
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i clicked on the original tweet just to see if anyone else felt as weird about it as i did because at this point i’m just tired of seeing people going on and on about trans men dating cishet men who try to convince them not to transition as if it’s a funny joke about a trans man doing something silly and not a manipulative and generally very unhealthy relationship dynamic that can hurt the trans man involved really deeply (as forcing someone back into the closet tends to do.)
did i find anyone else feeling that way? no. there were a few people pointing out that it was weird in general, and plenty saying it’s a weird thing to say about a cis woman, but nothing expressing any sort of concern about the tired stereotype it’s perpetuating.
but you know what i did find? replies like the one in the second screenshot, using the tweet as their chance to tell the world how much they hate trans men and how repulsive they find the idea of ever being compared to us. and replies like the third one, shaming trans men in relationships like that as if the fact that they’ve found themselves in an unhealthy relationship makes them deserving of public shaming, as if their relationship is hurting anyone other than them.
stereotypes like this just feel like yet another way of indirectly calling us stupid little girls who don’t know what’s good for us, and the fact that a picture of a woman is being used (even jokingly!) as an example of what trans men “like that” look like should make the implications of rhetoric like this all the more obvious.
it’s relationships like these that keep us miserable in the closet for so long and drive up our sexual assault rates even more. they’re not funny and if anyone is going to be making jokes about them, it certainly shouldn’t be people who have never been in that situation. if you actually cared about us you’d be looking for ways to support the trans men you know who are in relationships like that instead of hopping on twitter to joke about how stupid they must be.
i don’t care if it’s a joke. if it victim blames trans men for the transphobia we face in our personal relationships, adds to the common idea that we can’t be trusted to make decisions about our own lives, and invites even more blatant transphobia against us by people who unabashedly admit they see all trans men as “disgusting and phony”, it’s not fucking funny.
(i also want to note that the people making these jokes never like to mention that this also happens to trans men in relationships with queer women. they also hate those trans men, of course, and are happy to express that when they get into fights about trans men who date lesbians, but they’ll never talk about it in the context of this particular stereotype. it’s always a man being manipulative in a relationship and pressuring trans men to not transition, as if a woman would never be capable of such a thing.
they also like to conveniently ignore the existence of older trans men who transitioned after already being in a committed relationship with a cishet man and were able to make that relationship work despite their transition, because acknowledging that would require recognizing that trans men can be in seemingly contradictory relationships and genuinely be happy with their partner. who needs nuance when you can simply choose to judge all trans men for our relationships regardless of what they’re actually like?)
do you think they also would call me “a trans man being purposefully misgendered” with this kind of vitriol because i’m still living with parents who don’t recognize my gender instead of moving out before i’m ready to be financially independent? at this point, i’m starting to feel like they might, with the way every decision a trans man ever makes is the subject of a public debate and people have decided that trans men are secretly using being misgendered as a weapon to somehow hurt other trans people.
as a general rule, i’d say the only people who should be making “X looks like a trans man” jokes about literally anyone/anything are trans men, and posts like this show exactly why those jokes being made by anyone else (even by other trans people) just isn’t a good idea.
#just got home from work and cannot be bothered to proofread all of this well so. enjoy my Raw Thoughts#cue someone saying ‘it’s not that deep’ as if i didn’t just spend many paragraphs explain why it bothers me so much#examples of transandrophobia#transandrophobia#transandromisia#transmisandry#virilmisia#virilphobia#anti transmasculinity#transmascphobia
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Hey, sorry if you’ve been asked this before, but I have ADHD and I’ve been following your comic for years and just now have started to write my own comic (partially because you really inspired me). But I’m really struggling with staying on the project even when it’s boring and getting myself to work on it in the first place. Do you have any tips on how to keep your brain invested or just to make yourself do the work at all?
I have excellent news, I literally just figured out something really important about this.
So when you're an ADHD kiddo or otherwise have difficulty staying on task in a structured environment where Task is the Priority, the main way people try to MAKE you stay on task is by removing your access to anything that is not The Task. No phone, no TV, no doodling, no going outside, etc. In practice, this just makes us miserable because it takes the boredom that's always simmering around a 2 or 3 and cranks it all the way up to 11. In the same way that you would have difficulty staying on task if you were in physical pain, this crushing existential monotony makes it very difficult to work. The work might get done simply because you have no other options, but it will not be done quickly or well, and it will take a while to recover from how much it hurt.
What I realized earlier this week is I caught myself doing this to myself. I had 42 pages of background colors to do, and I thought to myself "this sounds really tedious, but I suppose I have nothing better I can do." And I realized what I'd just thought, and got very alarmed.
Because back when I was an ADHD kiddo imprisoned by school scheduling and a million little factors that keep children immobile and restrained, I couldn't stop thinking about how big and exciting the world was, and how much I wanted to be anywhere but here. When I was feeling really crushed in I'd pick a random spot on the maps on my wall and just imagine being there instead of my bedroom. This was the impetus behind almost all of my creative energy. I've said it before - anything is a prison if you can't leave, and being in a prison makes it easy to imagine how amazing things could be outside of it. Aurora's initial worldbuilding was forged in the crucible of fifth grade misery. My enthusiasm for art and my creative drive are inextricable from my sense of wonder and yearning for excitement in the real world. Not escapism, but appreciation. Wonders unimaginable are out there, and I gain just as much joy seeking them out as I do conjuring them up in my head and sharing them with all of you.
So now that I'm a grown-up with actual freedom in every way I've been able to get, the idea that I was staying on task by making myself believe the world was small and not worth seeing was extremely alarming. It could keep me on task for an afternoon, but at the cost of slowly extinguishing the thing that made me want to make art in the first place - the hunger to experience and draw inspiration from all the myriad complexities in the world.
So what I've been doing is I've been purposefully and intentionally taking excursions whenever I catch myself thinking "I could take a break but it wouldn't be worth it, it's the same outdoors as always, I'll be uncomfy and unproductive and tired." Because that is never true. Every time I've put down the stylus and gone out, I've been renewed in one way or another, and when I come back to comfort fully recharged I get a lot of shit done. Because it is easier to work on anything if you remember why you wanted to make it in the first place, and it is self-defeating misery to just lock yourself in with it and tell yourself you're a bad person if you can't get it done.
I honestly don't know how widely applicable this is. I have worse wanderlust than anyone I know, so for me this has always been modeled as imprisonment vs freedom. I've also been extremely lucky to find myself in a profession that lets me set my own pace on literally everything I do. But I genuinely believe that when it comes to making art with ADHD, you need to give yourself freedom to move laterally, not just in the direction of obvious forward progress. We don't think linearly in any other part of our lives - art is no different.
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₊⊹ 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘱𝘪𝘥 𝘤𝘶𝘱𝘪𝘥 ₊⊹
description: fluff ⋆ university au ⋆ fuckboy taesan turned loser
in which fuckboy turned loser taesan finds himself unexpectedly chasing after a sweet and innocent girl he met at a party
pairings: h. taesan x afab!reader
words: 4.6k
warnings: mildly suggestive ⋆ cussing ⋆ mentions of alcohol & sex
author’s note: hiii it’s lynn again!! (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) this oneshot is partially inspired by nct dream’s japanese song “stupid cupid” so i strongly recommend that you listen to it while reading (ㅅ´ ˘ `) happy reading !!
tags: @onedoornet
the arrow of love accidentally pierced me
"i'm not going."
taesan groaned and refused to move as jaehyun and leehan pulled his arm insistently to get him off the bed, miserably failing in their attempts to drag taesan to yet another party.
"since when do you of all people say no to parties"
jaehyun scoffed and crossed his arms while taesan glared back at him.
"i wanna have fun instead of being your guys' dd again. i go to parties with you guys and don't even get to drink let alone get laid"
he complained, waving his hands back and forth as leehan sprayed cologne all over the place, obviously bored with the way things were going with jaehyun's horrible attempt at persuading taesan to come.
"you don't have to be dd so pleaseeee come with us. it's literally walking distance to the other building"
jaehyun resorted to begging, dropping to his knees and holding his hands together in front of taesan. taesan just scoffed in amusement before looking at leehan.
"no dd?"
leehan shook his head in response, ceasing his cologne attacks. taesan let out a light sigh, stretching his arms before getting up off the bed.
"dress code is formal"
jaehyun shouted excitedly before running to the other room to grab his own outfit he brought to taesan's dorm.
taesan rummaged through his closet and found a black collared shirt with dress pants. he had no clue who chose the party theme but silently thanked them for giving him an excuse to wear that one shirt that emphasized his arm muscles perfectly.
"pregame~"
jaehyun sang as he came back holding three shot glasses and some soju, quickly pouring it before handing one to each person.
"to jaehyun hopefully getting laid tonight"
leehan toasted as jaehyun shamelessly seconded the wish.
'hopefully me too if these fuckers don't ruin it again'
taesan thought to himself as they all clinked shot glasses, downing them as fast as jaehyun poured them. the three sighed as the familiar slight fuzzy feeling coursed through their veins.
"okay let's go ladies !!"
jaehyun excitedly ushered everyone out the door, practically dragging taesan out of his own home.
"i need want a girl"
jaehyun whined the entire way there, leehan silently shaking his head at his desperation while taesan exasperatedly sighed.
"you say this and fumble every time because of how drunk you get. you think you'd learn after how many times it happened"
taesan shook his head as he raised his hand to ring the doorbell. he didn't even get near it before the door swung open and the most beautiful girl he's ever seen stepped out.
"oh shit it’s freezing- oh sorry, i opened the door kinda fast didn’t i? but hey, welcome in"
you looked up with a smile at the three boys, nodding briefly before stepping outside to go to your car and grab more drinks.
jaehyun and leehan excitedly went in, taesan following suit shortly after looking back to get a good look at you. not being able to see much since it was so dark out, he just went inside to make himself a drink.
taesan forgot about you for a while, instead drinking and hanging out with other people he recognized at the party. he stayed with sungho and riwoo, his upperclassman friends from his class.
"oh y/n!"
sungho called you over and waved after seeing you finally put all the drinks on the counter. you gave him a bright smile and waved back, carefully walking over while avoiding bumping into other people.
"hey guys, how's the party?"
you asked with a slight giggle as you gave sungho a side hug, already a little tipsy from the fruity cocktail you held.
"it's great y/n. glad to see you're finally loosening up"
sungho joked as you nudged his shoulder lightly. taesan just watched your guys' interaction, mostly focusing on you. he recognized you as the one who swung open the door, and he finally got to take a good look at you in better lighting.
you were much shorter than him and wearing a tight, navy blue dress that hugged all your curves so perfectly. your hair was curled and had tiny blue bows in it to match your dress. you had glittery makeup that made you glow even more when you smiled.
it was simple: taesan couldn't keep his eyes off you. and not in the normal 'she's so bad' kinda way. he fell in love on sight.
"he's kidding, i'm actually the one who introduced him to all our regulars who throw parties"
you smiled at taesan with a hint of worry in your eyes at how dazed he seemed. taesan snapped out of it and nodded back at you.
"oh? did you two already know each other?"
riwoo asked in slight surprise, becoming even more amused when the two of you shook your heads. he'd been observing the entire thing, and could clearly see taesan was unusually interested in you.
"oh my gosh, i'm so sorry. i haven't even introduced myself yet. i'm y/n"
you smiled brightly and stuck a hand out for taesan to shake and he took it delicately, squeezing it gently. you just missed the faint blush spreading on the back of his neck before he covered it up with his hand.
"i'm taesan. i think i've seen you around campus. nursing major right?"
you adopted a look of surprise and nodded.
"yeah, how'd you know??"
"your pretty face isn't exactly forgettable, you know"
you froze up in shock at how bold taesan was being for someone you just met. taesan felt like he wanted to die at the corny line.
usually fuckboy taesan was more pulled together and could say stuff like that easily, but around you? he had no idea what had gotten into him.
sungho and riwoo just stared in astonishment at the clear flirting happening between the two of you
"sungho and i are gonna go out to the car real quick. we'll be right back"
riwoo said all of a sudden, pointedly smirking at taesan before dragging sungho off to sit outside for a bit. you watched with slight shock as the two quickly darted through the crowd to get outside, turning your attention back to an equally flustered taesan.
"okay anyways mr. stalker, i haven't seen you around campus. what's your major?"
you asked as you gestured towards the counter, offering to make taesan a drink. he quickly downed the little beer he had left and followed you.
"i'm a kines major. i saw you a couple times when preparing for the sports clinic event"
"ooh so we might be working together soon for the sports clinic event soon?"
you turned to look at him, smiling as you handed him a fruity pink cocktail. taesan looked down and smiled slightly at the glitter coating the rim, praying that it was edible as he took the glass from your hand. he didn't miss the way your hand lingered on his before fully handing it over.
"yeah, and i might be the patient with how sweet this drink looks"
taesan looked at you teasingly as he gestured to the glittery drink, making you giggle as he took a sip.
"how is it?"
"good. it's not too sweet for me, thank goodness"
taesan nodded and you let out a little sigh of relief, a smile spreading on your face as you sipped your own drink.
"so anyways, are you a lightweight?
before you two knew it, you had migrated to the couch to have an actual conversation, taking more than enough twisted teas with you.
"fuck no. bet i could drink more than you"
taesan snorted, looking at your mock offense as you gasped.
"you're on"
you grinned as you clinked cocktail glasses with him, preparing for a long night of drinking with someone new.
"so how'd you get to know sungho and riwoo?"
taesan looked at you while passing a can of twisted tea, clinking your guys' cans together while you thought of how you guys met.
"we met in one of my classes last year. those two basically took me into their friend group and watched over me since i didn't know anyone, and we got close that way. and you?"
"they're kines majors too, so we work together a lot. they're hella cool people"
you hummed and nodded in agreement.
at first it was just small talk and getting to know each other, but it quickly escalated to faint touches and obvious flirting. at least on taesan's part.
"we should meet up sometime to go eat"
taesan turned his head to look at you, both of you sitting sloppily on the couch, already pretty tipsy. you giggled and looked at him.
"i'd like that. wanna go out to eat something together?"
you kept giggling, slurring your words as you reached to clutch taesan's arm for stability before pulling away, laying down in the process. he didn't miss the way you trailed your nails down his forearm before pulling away.
"of course. make it a date?
taesan finished off his can of twisted tea before looking back at you, eyes getting heavy as he reached to interlock his fingers with yours.
before you could even say anything, taesan passed out right next to you. you shot up and checked to see if he was okay before lying back down next to him, laughing nonstop at how ridiculous the situation was.
as if on cue, jaehyun and leehan stumbled into the living room and saw taesan passed out next to you.
"did this loser actually fall asleep?"
leehan snorted as you giggled, shaking your head and clearly having no idea what was actually going on. jaehyun just laughed and worked to drag taesan up and out.
"thanks for hosting y/n. it was fun"
jaehyun gave you a smile and wave before putting taesan on his back. as the three left, your roommate came into the room with a smirk as she picked you up and brought you to your room.
"oh pretty girl, we're gonna have a fun talk tomorrow"
chaeryeong scoffed, an amused smile spreading across her lips as you smacked your lips and smiled contently as you fell asleep.
girl you got me crazy, blame it on stupid cupid
taesan woke up the next morning feeling like absolute shit. he got up to go get water from the kitchen and saw jaehyun sitting at the counter, looking like he was also dying of a fat headache.
"hey"
jaehyun croaked out as he passed taesan a packet of liquid iv and a plate of pancakes.
"hey. did u get anyone's number this time?"
taesan asked as customary after a party, with jaehyun groaning and shaking his head as usual.
"i saw you talking it up with y/n though"
jaehyun teased and a slight smile appeared on taesan's face. before he could say anything, leehan ran into the room.
"you're talking to y/n? of all people you chose y/n??"
leehan said a little too loudly, causing the other two to clutch their heads and hurriedly shush him for how loud he was being.
"what's wrong with y/n? you know her or something?"
taesan's eyebrows furrowed and jaehyun nodded in agreement.
"nothing's wrong with y/n. but you?? and y/n?? mister fuckboy taesan trying to get in the pants of the nicest person in the world??"
leehan questioned as taesan looked taken aback.
"who said i wanted to get in her pants? and why are you so shocked in the first place?"
leehan sighed and took a fat swig of jaehyun's water, ignoring jaehyun's protests.
"y/n doesn't seem like the type of girl you can fuck around with for fun. she gives off the vibe of looking for a genuine relationship"
leehan explained as jaehyun snatched his water back and chugged the rest.
"well good because i actually like her"
taesan scoffed as jaehyun spat out the water across the kitchen island.
"WHAT."
leehan and jaehyun both turned to taesan with the most incredulous looks in their eyes. taesan looked at them and scoffed.
"is it that hard to believe i can like someone?"
"yes."
"dude you're literally the epitome of an emo fuckboy."
"okay rude. maybe not like her, but i'm interested"
taesan rolled his eyes while the other two collected themselves and laughed.
"you and y/n as a couple would be insane"
leehan cackled as he walked out of the room, jaehyun's own laughs quieting as he cleaned up the water.
"whatever. see you in class tomorrow"
taesan glared at jaehyun, going back to the guest room to grab his stuff, promptly leaving to go to his own apartment.
24/7 like a party ... it's going to go out of control, heartbeat
for the next couple days, taesan miraculously saw you everywhere. sure, he'd seen you around campus once or twice, but now? you were popping up around every corner every second of the day, and taesan was going insane.
"bro why do you keep staring at that fountain? it’s the middle of winter. it’s not even running"
jaehyun complained as he looked over at the fountain and saw absolutely nothing. taesan shook out of his daze and turned back to jaehyun.
"just spacing out"
he shrugged and jaehyun gave him a weird look, continuing whatever he was talking about while taesan stayed dazed.
"is that y/n?"
leehan suddenly said and taesan whipped his head towards the fountain again. but you weren't there.
"holy shit he wants her bad"
jaehyun and leehan started laughing as taesan just groaned and put his head in his hands.
"i've been seeing her around here every day and i swear i've never even seen her here before that party. should've gotten her number"
taesan muttered as he lifted his head to look at the two, who were the ones staring at the fountain this time.
"i think you manifested y/n's appearance"
leehan laughed and jaehyun waved at taesan, motioning him to go over to you.
"go talk to her and get her number loverboy"
he hissed and taesan hesitated. seeing you weren't with friends or anything today, he decided to go over before you left.
it's going to be bad if you keep going like this
"y/n?"
you looked up to see taesan walking towards you, acting all surprised that you were there as if he hadn't seen you there for a whole week straight.
"oh hey, taesan right? good to see you again"
you smiled as taesan came to a stop right in front of you.
"how's the clinic been going for you? i haven't seen you around so i guess we didn't sign up for the same shifts or something?"
taesan asked and your smile dropped a little. you really thought you'd see taesan at the clinic sessions, and not seeing him until now made your unusual encounter all the more nerve racking.
"it's been a lot of fun working with my classmates and meeting the kines majors"
your bright smile came back and taesan couldn't help but smile back at you.
"that's great, they're all really good people. um, well, i was wondering if-"
"Y/N!"
you whipped your head around to see sungho calling your name and waving at you. you smiled and waved back while taesan also waved awkwardly.
"oh hey taesan. y/n and i were about to go shopping around the area. wanna join us?"
sungho invited and taesan shook his head.
"i just came over to say hi real quick. jaehyun and leehan are over there waiting for me anyways"
he gestured towards his friends, and you and sungho both nodded in understanding.
"well, bye taesan"
you reached to give taesan's arm a quick, gentle squeeze as you walked by. sungho smirked at the sight as he gave taesan a pat on the back, unknowingly having ruined taesan's attempt to get your number.
taesan walked like a dejected puppy back to his friends who were eagerly waiting to hear the story by this point.
"i got cockblocked and didn't get her number"
he groaned and buried his face in his hands while the other two looked on and laughed.
"never in my life did i think taesan was a loser until now"
leehan chuckled as he calmed down, jaehyun still dying and fighting for his life while taesan continued to look dejected.
all taesan could think about is what that touch on the arm meant. was it casual? did you already pick up on the fact that he liked you? did you reciprocate? he was completely confused.
"watch, i'm gonna get her number soon"
taesan declared as he got up and started walking to his next class after bidding the two goodbye.
"wanna bet that he isn't gonna get it by the time the week is over"
"bet he is"
"$20?"
"you're on"
is it bad? is it good?
taesan was able to poke his head around the clinic to visit you under the pretense of visiting his other kines major friends.
and every. single. time. you drove taesan crazy with the subtle touches you would give in response to his poor flirting.
at first it started simple with a little squeeze of the hand or arm, but then it escalated to interlocking your fingers together while you had a conversation.
taesan thought it was cute with the way you played with his fingers while he talked, but also? it set his heart on fire and he lost his train of thought the moment he felt you rub your thumb against the palm of his hand.
"um, taesan?"
you questioned in response to his silence, to which taesan shook out of his daze and kept yapping about what kines majors do.
taesan thought he was fumbling bad. he stuttered constantly, ears flushed whenever you gave him one of your light touches, and was visibly shaking when you held his hand. the boy was so worried that he was gonna scare you off just by coming off so awkward.
i don't know what to do
“what the fuck”
riwoo woke up to an obnoxious taesan banging on the door, to which he scrambled to open it as soon as possible.
“what’s wrong?”
riwoo croaked out as he saw taesan’s panicked face.
“i think i’m fumbling y/n”
he breathed out as he walked in and collapsed on the couch, a confused riwoo following behind him after shutting the door.
“what did you do”
riwoo collapsed next to him, grabbing a pillow and shutting his eyes while preparing to listen to taesan’s rant.
“i don’t even know but i’ve been hella nervous around her and stuttering and i still haven’t asked for her number and she’s been all touchy with me and i’m scared of what she thinks of me i’m so confused”
taesan said all at once while riwoo stayed silent to process it all.
“wait so are you really interested in something real with her?”
riwoo opened his eyes and admitted defeat since he couldn’t go back to sleep with a yapping taesan.
taesan’s eyebrows furrowed before nodding slightly.
“well thank goodness because she’s not the type to fuck around. anyways, if she’s been touchy and not dry then i think that means you’re okay no? y/n plays dumb but she’s not naive. if she’s acting like that then she’s probably interested too”
riwoo concluded before thinking for a bit again.
“just start by getting her number. i don’t know why you think it’s so hard after having an entire catalog of girls’ numbers, but start by deleting all those if you want something serious. and be good to her. that girl’s my ride or die”
riwoo yawned as he ushered taesan out the door.
“you really think i can get her number?”
“positive, you fucking loser”
riwoo teased as taesan rolled his eyes, taking a deep breath before walking down to find y/n at the clinic again.
he saw you standing in the doorway preparing to take a patient in for a flu shot. you glanced up and gave taesan a small smile before closing the door for the patient’s privacy.
taesan’s heart was racing a mile a minute as he sat and waited for you to be done in the room. he took a while to calm his heart down and steel up his nerves, but he did over the course of the 20 minutes you were gone.
“taesan? what are you doing here?”
taesan jumped slightly at the sound of your voice, not realizing you had walked the patient out already and stood in front of him.
“i came to say hi, maybe ask if you wanted to get lunch or something?”
taesan tried to be as nonchalant as possible while he said that, but the rosy blush on his cheeks gave him away. you couldn’t help the small smile that spread to the corners of your lips.
“i’d love to! just let me get changed really quick”
you grabbed your tote bag and ran off to the dressing room to change as soon as possible. taesan laughed lightly at how you seemed so excited to go eat after probably 6 hours at the clinic.
“ready?”
taesan stood up the moment he saw you come out and you smiled and nodded.
“i was thinking we could walk to somewhere around campus. you craving anything specific?”
taesan looked at you while you two walked and you thought for a minute before looking up at him.
“i’ve kinda been craving udon”
you admitted and taesan looked at you as if you were the most perfect person in the world. udon? in the middle of winter?? with a beautiful girl??? taesan was practically on cloud 9.
“sounds perfect to me”
taesan smiled and you two walked together down to the little area on campus full of restaurants and little shops. the two of you sat down in a small booth and taesan could barely keep eye contact with you. he thanked god that you decided to sit opposite of him or else you would’ve felt the seat shake from how much he was trembling.
“do you have any classes after this?”
you suddenly asked and taesan shook his head.
“do you?”
you sadly nodded your head.
“i have psych in 2 hours so we can still stay here and talk for a good while”
you smiled as you looked at taesan and he couldn’t help but mirror your smile too. the sweet waitress came back with your guys’ bowls of udon, so the conversation quieted for a while, with some small talk and jokes scattered in between bites.
“thank you for coming to see me and taking me to get lunch”
you said happily as you took the check from the waitress’s hands, smile dropping when you saw that the bill was paid for entirely.
“taesan what the hell? you didn’t have to pay for lunch. i can pay you back”
you hurriedly opened your purse until taesan stopped you and shook his head.
“i asked you to lunch so i’m gonna pay. don’t even worry about it”
he said as he guided you to stand up and walk outside. you had a slight frown on your lips, feeling guilty for not having contributed at all.
“let me pay for lunch next time though, please?”
you pleaded with taesan and he looked at you skeptically before laughing and nodding.
“give me your number so we can plan another lunch date?”
you smirked and raised your eyebrows at that, but put your number in taesan’s phone nonetheless.
“you’re not slick han taesan, i see you”
you laughed and taesan looked away in slight embarrassment before laughing with you. in reality, taesan’s heart was bursting with joy, but he wasn’t about to let you know that he was freaking out inside.
“i’ll walk you to class. it’s on the way to the dorms anyways”
taesan looked at you and said, making you smile at him gratefully.
“at least it’s a short walk. ready to go?”
you snaked your arm around taesan’s, holding it close while you two walked back to campus.
“i had a lot of fun talking to you today. i’ve been wondering if you were ever gonna reach out after we talked at my party”
you admitted as you two walked back to school. taesan scoffed in an attempt to hide how happy he was that you reciprocated.
“i had a lot of fun talking to you then too. i wanted to talk to you more but i didn’t have your number”
taesan said as he reached a hand up to cover the blush on his neck. it didn’t go unnoticed by you but you didn’t mention it.
“well you do now. i gotta go but text me whenever so we can go on a longer date next time taesan”
you gave taesan’s arm one final squeeze with a sweet smile before disappearing into the lecture room, slowly disappearing from taesan’s line of sight.
the moment taesan couldn’t see you anymore, he started smiling so widely he thought his cheeks were gonna stretch out.
“bro she’s so sweet and so cute and i finally got her number”
taesan yapped all about you to jaehyun and leehan, who were less than happy to listen but also happy for you. they loved you like a sister and were happy it was taesan of all people who liked you enough to change his fuckboy ways.
however, things usually happen in more ways than one, don’t they? as they say, all’s fair in love and war.
blame it on stupid cupid
“chaer?”
you woke up on the night of your party and rubbed your eyes to find your roommate basically trembling with excitement to hear the story of you and taesan.
“girl you gotta tell me everything that happened between you guys”
chaeryeong jumped onto your bed and waited eagerly to hear the story.
“nothing even happened. he’s just really sweet and wanted to get to know me a little. was too drunk to get my number though”
you said simply, hoping that chaeryeong wouldn’t question it, but she did.
“what do you mean he didn’t get your number? you’re SO FINE i would’ve asked immediately”
she complained and you shrugged. all of a sudden she shot up, startling you in the process.
“fuck no y/n, this is operation ‘get you with taesan’ time”
chaeryeong said and you groaned, not bothering to hide your amused smile.
“lay it on me. what’s your amazing plan chaer?”
“GIRL OKAY so you need to walk by these places every day. taesan passes by them pretty often. i see him all the time walking to class so make HIM come to YOU”
she huffed proudly after she finished her speech and you clapped sarcastically.
“i can try. we also have clinic together so maybe he can ask for my number then too”
“also make sure to touch his shoulder or something. guys are like, from the victorian era. they’ll take ANYTHING as a sign so long as you give it to them”
you weren’t that confident taesan was even interested in you like that, but seeing the way he looked for you every time you passed by the fountain made you wanna keep teasing him by simply passing by.
the moment he actually came up to you was the moment you knew you got him. and so, the actual mastermind behind you and taesan progressing was none other than lee chaeryeong.
girl you got me crazy, blame it on stupid cupid
#boynextdoor#onedoornet#han taesan#kim leehan#kim woonhak#lee riwoo#myung jaehyun#park sungho#bnd#bnd x reader#boynextdoor x reader#taesan x reader#taesan#leehan#woonhak#riwoo#jaehyun#boynextdoor sungho#chaeryeong
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'FOGGY STREETS AND CHRISTMAS LIGHTS'
(part 3/3)
I'm gonna infodump about the backstory of this comic, don't feel obligated to read it because it's not cotl related it's just personal stuff, I just want to be able to write about it somewhere cause I can't really talk to anyone about it.
As always, thanks for reading this far, sorry my stuff has been such a bummer so consistently. This comic goes out to all my "christmas induced depression" homies, I left my house maybe like ~5 times all month and it was NOT pleasant hearing "IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR!!" on the radio when I'm so ready for it to be over. Gonna take it reaaaaal easy til the year ends, you guys take it easy too!! Got some asks I have to respond to when I'm more stable but probably no new comic pages til january
Alright uhhh so this part of the comic is pretty much taken directly from the last time I saw my great-grandma alive, a few days before christmas. She didn't remember me, but at the nursing home there was a piano, and I sat down and played some stuff because I didn't know what to say. I was really into lisa the painful rpg at the time, and I played that "I've got the joy" song that the villain sings without realizing it was an old christian campfire song. She didn't really say much or move that whole night, just kind of gave me a polite blank smile, but started singing the words when I played the notes to that song.
I kinda stopped in shock, my dad frantically asked me to keep playing, so I did. While the comic I made is way more sappy than the actual moment was, I wish I'd cherished the moment longer. I didn't know it was the last time I'd see her alive. Every family christmas was held at her house when she was around, so it's been weird the past few years. I actually lost another dementia-addled grandma to cancer on christmas eve in 2009, so the holiday was already kind of weird for me on top of everything else that makes me sad this time of year. That's what part 2 was about, I'll spare the details but I wrote leshy to act out how I felt back then. Why are we all sad? This is supposed to be a happy time, all the decorations are up and we're almost all here, so why is everyone smiling yet everything feels so wrong? I feel like since leshy's canonically the most ignorant one to things lurking below the surface, he'd be the one to try and make everyone feel better but not quite understand why everyone is so miserable. My first memory of having self injurious behavior came from then, hence why I had leshy pull his leaves off in the last comic. It was confusing and frustrating and I was just old enough to comprehend something was wrong, but not old enough to understand the depth of it, it DEFINITELY didn't help that nobody helped me back then so I made leshy's siblings actually come in clutch instead of grabbing him/yelling at him.
That night with the piano was something that's stuck with me the few years she's been gone, but I felt kind of strange when I asked my dad and my sister about it and neither of them remembered it. The room we were in was completely empty so nobody else witnessed it but us three. I myself have a history of head trauma and memory loss (plus, native americans are disproportionately more likely to develop dementia... lucky us) so if I ever forgot about that moment, there'd be nobody left to remember it. Sometimes when I do comics, it's my way of going "this happened at some point, and the only evidence it ever happened was me witnessing it, so if something happens to me I want the memory to stay alive in some form."
Anyway. The autistic urge to overshare, am I right? Idk what my religious ass great-grandma would think of me drawing demonic comics about my last memory of her, she'd probably think it's funny though cause she raised my dad whose interests have always been "death metal and devil worship". I'm not sure if anyone read this far, I just hope my dumb comics can convey the things I can't say with my voice and struggle to say through text. None of this was supposed to be "feel bad for me!! Woe is me!!", it was supposed to me more like...cathartic? Healing? I almost didn't post this comic because it felt kinda weird, but seeing people connect with it made it worth it imo. Thank you
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part one ; office mate! gojo ; company heir! gojo ; female intern! reader ; fluff ; pre getting together
Satoru is good at getting things he wants. It’s not because he’s spoiled (although he’s that, too) but rather, it’s because he’s persistent. Annoyingly so. Persistent in that way where he doesn’t necessarily earn what he wants, but scores it just because the other party is tired enough to cave for the sake of some peace.
Case example: you.
You sit across from him as he happily sips on his excessively expensive coffee from all the extra syrups.
“How can you have that much sugar?” You cringe.
He raises an amused brow as he hums, “Because I don’t choose to be miserable. You should try it sometime.”
Glaring, you roll your eyes before taking a sip of your own coffee. Satoru is at least nice and chivalrous enough to pay for your coffee—although, knowing what you do now, it’s not exactly as though he can’t afford it. You’re pretty sure being the heir to the company you intern for means he’s loaded in enough money that a simple iced coffee isn’t too much of a dent in his pockets.
You give him an unimpressed frown before getting to the heart of the matter. “Why didn’t you tell me your dad owns the company?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yes,” you hiss, “I’ve been passive aggressively calling you a lazy asshole for two months!”
“Do you change your mind about that?” He asks infuriatingly calmly.
“No,” you admit. You take a long look at him before nodding in confirmation as you repeat, “No, I don’t.”
He pouts a little at that, still cute and aggravating at the same time. “Hey,” he says, only a little wounded and a whole lot excessively dramatic. You can tell he didn’t get a lot of attention growing up with the way he pulls theatrics. Something about the psychology of unmet emotional needs as a child from your one semester of psych in college comes back. “You don’t have to say it so condescendingly.”
“Well, you are lazy,” you point out. He shrugs because…well, it’s a fair point. “But now I know why.”
“So what, if you knew my old man was our big boss, you’d be nicer to me? Is that it?”
You crinkle your nose and give him a look of disbelief. “No,” you say—it’s almost amused. The first ounce of humor you’ve shown around him at all. “But I wouldn’t have wasted my energy caring that you’re a deadweight in the office.”
“Ouch,” he pouts, “I bought the coffee machine on our floor!”
“It’s getting rather faulty,” you hum, “You should consider investing in another one for us.”
Satoru likes that about you. You’re interesting. Interesting not because you’re exceptionally smart or all that impressive—not that you’re bad by any means. Being accepted as an intern here must mean your resume has a degree of prestige to it, but you’re just like any other person in the building. Except, instead of shrugging off his bratty, obnoxious self, you seem to care a great deal about what he does.
It greatly amuses him enough that you’ve sparked his interest.
“You’re fun,” he chuckles, “I like you. You’re not boring.”
“Just what every woman wants to hear,” you bat your lashes, sarcastically giving him a dreamy sigh, “Not boring. How charming of you.”
He grins wider, and something in your heart does a little bit of a clench. It’s so…pretty. Everything about him is pretty. The clean, pristine button down with perfectly ironed pants. The soft, messy hair that somehow adds to his expensive look rather than take away. Those bright, piercing blue eyes that feel like you’re lost in infinity when you look into them.
He’s pretty. Pretty annoying, too—but pretty all the same.
“I’m working on it,” he murmurs.
“What? Your manners?” You snort.
“My charm,” he corrects.
“We might be here for quite some time then,” you tease. You don’t know what it is. Falling into a bantering back and forth with him is so easy—so amusing and, if you’re honest, a tiny bit exciting.
Maybe a background of wealth and fortune makes a man appealing like that. Or maybe he’s just likable. You’re not sure yet.
“You’re saying you’ll be here waiting for me to get there?” He raises a brow, winking as he adds, “So maybe you’re charmed after all.”
“That’s a stretch,” you pretend to scoff. Nevermind the hardly hidden smile on your face—that means nothing. “I just want to watch you fail, that’s all.”
“And if I succeed?” He challenges, looking at you expectantly.
You roll your eyes, deciding to indulge him in whatever petty games he has going on. “In what, being charming?”
“Yes,” he nods, “What if I succeed in being an irresistible dreamboat of an office neighbor?”
“I doubt that’ll happen,” you bite your lip in an attempt to fight back a large, dimpled grin. It’s funny, you think—just up until a few hours ago, all he ever managed to do was pull your lips into a scowl. Now, it feels like it’s impossible not to stretch them into a smile. “But, if it does, I suppose I’ll eat my own words.”
“No,” Satoru shakes his head, lips curled into a serious, unsatisfied frown, “No that simply won’t do. I need better than that.”
“Okay,” you finally laugh. It’s radiant. It comes from your belly and vibrates through your chest. He’s somehow good at it—just one coffee grab during your lunch break, and he’s already managed to earn the sound of your joy so easily. Something about that tickles a weird, unfamiliar spot under your ribcage. “Lay out your terms.”
“You have to be my girlfriend if I manage to make your eyes turn into hearts over my handsomely unbeatable appeal.”
It’s cheeky, his grin. Wide, confident, and still boyishly hopeful. You start to wonder why you ever disliked such an easy to fall for smile.
“That’s pretty bold,” you note.
“I’m bold about the things I want.” You pretend that those words don’t make your heart do a helpless flutter.
“Okay,” you nod, agreeing as you take a final sip of your coffee and hand him the empty cup, “I’ll agree to these unlikely terms. You can start by bringing me another coffee.”
“You got it, boss,” he salutes before doing a giddy little jog to the counter and ordering you another coffee. It’s cute. It has your heart in a scarily fast chokehold.
Somewhere in the heat of the moment, as you watch him fumble over his wallet and almost drop his card while he goes to pay, you think he may have already won the terms to this ridiculous agreement.
But you won’t tell him that, you think. Just to drag out the eager, hopeful look in his eyes that dart over at you and shoot you a sly wink.
———————————
here is part two as promised for @enyathedrakaina bc they sent me cat pics
#—rivistyping!#gojo x reader#gojo x you#gojo fluff#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru fluff#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen fluff
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what could you think of for a second and third phase for super dimentio
Ymmm I don't really see him having another phases so no but I've had something for the first 20 seconds of his initial battle in mind.
Tag, he's it.
okay so like spm spoilers and stuff but:
When you first start the battle with Super Dimentio there's a certain period of time where he's invincible. You can't damage him and nothing really happens until Timpani returns with the Pure Hearts.
Now in my personal opinion while I'm still glad they added this moment, it still left me a little unsatisfied. Here's why:
Dimentio turning into Super Dimentio with Luigi is his big moment, his victory. He has become something that is indestructible, something that generations of Ancients have been passing down. He is a god. The time frame where he's indestructible in the game is supposed to show that you are powerless against him, that no Pixl and no item will do anything. This is supposed to make you realize in the moment that: it's truly hopeless.
Unfortunately Dimentios spotlight is VERY quickly taken from him, which makes the idea less effective than it could've been. You see Dimentio working for this the entire game, just for him to win in the end only for 20 seconds and then turn into a joke of a fight. The speech he gives before the fight is longer than the actual boss, making everything slightly anticlimactic (at least to me).
The concept I've been thinking about using in my take of the Super Mario lore (SPM specifically here) is that those 20 seconds of standing and waiting around for the game to decide it's time to move on are instead spent on: A reverse game of magical tag.
The concept of a magical tag itself is used earlier in the game by Dimentio himself who makes Mario and Luigi humour him by traveling through the worlds they have been in before and finding ripples in space he's leaving behind to keep the game going. I thought by turning this moment of 20 second invincibility into a game of magical tag where he's “it” this time would help that feeling of hopelessness and stakes sink in.
In this scenario Mario still cannot fight back as Dimentio,actively chasing him, is invincible, which forces him to run from danger. He runs from world to world, but now in contrast to the previous tag game, the worlds are being wiped out as you go through them for the final time. They're barely holding on, torn from their colors and mixing with the white void peeking through. Maybe some leftover npcs encouraging to keep going or just being terrified instead. Dimentio is chasing after you, peeking his long arms or head through the ripples to strike, and as he makes his way behind you the world progressively disappears and you have to make it out before it's entirely gone, else its game over. In the end of this chase you make it back to Castle Bleck where it picks up on Timpani restoring the Pure Hearts with Blumiere and using them to help Mario by removing Super Dimentios invincibility.
In conclusion I think making this moment akin to what I described above would help set the tone of this enemy more. For one this moment is now LONGER so you can see direct consequences of Dimentios victory outside and think about it more, second it turns you into an actual helpless plaything that you were meant to be. The entire path of the chase leads you back to Castle Bleck, it's a circle. This time you cannot escape and this time the evil doings have been set in motion on a rapid scale. It's a moment of Darkness that's broken by Timpani, someone who has been with you since the beginning and who you saw grow. She's now full of love and determined to win, something that to me comes off as super inspiring. She has been cursed to live a miserable existence yet she found the Light thanks to you. And THAT'S why you shouldn't give up even after all the ruined worlds you've seen. You have to keep fighting for them even in their darkest moment, even when they're gone.
also to clear any confusion yes i know this game is 3+ but i still think it'd be cool ig
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This One's For You
Pairing: hockey player!bucky x NHL Photographer! Reader
Warning: Bucky barnes being a heartthrob
Authors Note: another snippet of Bucky and hotshot 🤭
The arena is a buzz of excitement; gold and black line one side, red and blue line the other, the two colors meeting and molding in the middle of each side. You’re at ice-level behind the protective barrier of Plexi-glass as you wait like the many fans for the game to start. Your equipment sits on your chair – a lone stool that has unfortunately seen better days. As you go to get your camera set up you feel your phone vibrate in the confines of your jean pocket.
Plucking your phone from your jeans you see an unread message from Natasha waiting to be opened. A picture of your jacketed back stares back at you, the message below reading,
‘You’d look so much better with your jacket off, a certain right defenseman would agree with me.’
‘It’s cold!’ you shoot back.
‘I left the apartment with you this morning, you have a long sleeve under, black one, remember?”
You curse your roommate under your breath, another message popping up below that one.
‘Take it Off or I’ll personally go take it off!’
‘Shouldn’t you be taking pre-game photos?’
A moment later a photo of Bucky walking in through the backstage of the arena is taking up your screen, he’s wearing a tailored suit, his hair lazily slicked back as he winks at the camera, his all too pink lips curled in a wicked smile. Your heart skips a beat in your chest, your teeth capturing the smile that threatens to break through.
‘Now take it off.’
‘So bossy’ you mutter under your breath as you take off your jacket, your jersey that she gifted you for your birthday now on full display.
‘Happy now?’
Her text takes a while to come in and only then do you realize why when her text comes in with Bucky’s contact attached. A picture of you adorning his jersey pops up a message appearing shortly after.
‘See now that looks so much better! Woops wrong chat..’
You whip your head around trying but failing miserably to find the blonde in question. Your phone vibrates in your hand.
‘Looking Good Hot Shot! Drinks on me after the win..”
‘At least take her to dinner first Barnes.. 😉’
Your cheeks are warm despite the cool air of the arena nipping at your skin as you read the messages transpiring between the two.
‘He didn’t mean it like that Tasha! Besides he’d need to secure a win against the Rangers first.’ is your odd lame of an attempt to dust away any feelings between the two of you your friend is trying to make appear out of thin air.
‘The win was in the bag the second you stepped foot into the arena Hot shot, you wearing my name was just an added bonus, oh I totally meant it like that but can the drinks be on you instead?’ 😉'
‘With all those puck bunnies sporting your last name throwing themselves at you I doubt you’ll remember, but given the chance you remember drinks can be on me.’
“Stop sabotaging yourself.” You jump slightly, hand on your racing chest as you look over your shoulder finding Natasha, her gear tossed over her shoulder, lanyard laid against her chest. She gives you a pointed stare, “you and Barnes have been doing this same old dance for some time now and it’s getting tiring y/n.” She shakes her head at you, “Not like that, this whole will they won’t they, we’re rooting for the two of you y/n. He’s not Brock,” she murmurs her hand reaching out for yours. “He’s reaching, barring his hand to you – you just need to meet him halfway and trust that he’ll catch you, we all know he will, we’re all just waiting for you – he’s waiting for you.”
You suck in a breath at her words, she knew where your uncertainty came from when allowing yourself to feel anything for the bruin's player, “but what if he doesn’t, you saw how -” you shake your head not willing yourself to go back there.
Both your phones vibrate in your hands but you only see yours,
‘Not letting you back out now hotshot because the only bunny I’ll be chasing is you tonight, hopefully the drinks taste as sweet as you.’
Natasha’s grin is evident as she closes in on you one arm going around you as she hooks he chin on your shoulder. “You see!” she points at the screen you still look at. “You’re not wrong about all the puck bunnies sporting his name wanting an inkling of his time, but he only has eyes for you, let him know you see him right back y/n.”
She’s grinning squeezing your arm as she reads your reply,
‘Hope you run just as good as you skate Barnes.’
Natasha throws her head back on a laugh as you pocket your phone reaching for your camera as you get into position the announcements popping up on the screen. “This game just got so much better!”
Red and blue lights flood the arena, the sea of Rangers fans standing tall, getting loud as their teams players flash across the screen. The players glide onto the ice from their opening, circling the arena as they hype their crowd. You’re quick to take notice of a few of the players lingering on your side egging the opposing teams' fans on. It’s short-lived as the screen changes, shades of black and gold flashing, the Bruins players coming onto the screen. The crowd behind you roars in excitement Natasha joining in as you lift your lens, they come in fast and hot as they circle the arena in the same manner. You’re quick to get shots in rapid succession, focusing in on a few personal shots at the player’s that are closest to you.
You spot Sam, the camera finding him easily as he does what he does best. He always gets a kick out of warming up the crowd, getting them riled up for the game. It puts him in the headspace he needs to ensure his team a win. Your camera spots Steve next, he’s gliding closer to where you and Natasha are, a grin pulls at your lips, heartwarming for your friend who gets herself closer to the glass. You capture the moment he comes to a stop in front of the Plexi-glass his gloved hand pressing against where her’s already rests waiting. You lean back a bit to get both of them in the shot you know Natasha would be requesting that photo by the end of the night.
“Kick some ass out there Rogers, give me something to celebrate tonight.”
The dirty blonde taps the glass throwing a wink her way, “Good luck out there Stevie!” you call out, as he turns to skate to where Sam is. A tap on the glass has you turning your head in the other direction, the crowd seemingly getting louder as Bucky approaches you from the opposite side of the glass. You bring your camera up to capture him, a breathtaking smile cutting his lips as he stares at you through the lens of your camera. You notice he doesn’t get as close as Steve does, but he only has eyes for you as he glides across, “this one's for you hotshot!”
“Good luck out there B!” You hide your smile behind the lens of your camera capturing the grin that splits his lips before he’s turning to the call of his name.
The referee's whistle kicks off the game, and its as good of a game as Natasha said it would be.
You don’t set your camera down for a single second of the game as you focus on the players on the ice and capturing ‘the shot’. You’ve managed to dodge a few pucks and players that have flown your way into the glass. It’s fast paced, brutal even as both teams fight to secure that win.
It’s down to the wire now, the crowd is tense as they watch their teams leave it all on the ice. Your cameras resting against your chest, Natasha gripping your hand in hers as your eyes follow the players. “C’mon c’mon, bring it home!” she pleads. You catch the moment Steve begins his move for the winning shot, your camera coming up to follow the game behind the lens of your camera. Bucky and Sam stay in Steve’s line of sight as he passes the puck to Sam, Sam then glides forward Bucky just a few feet off to his side to get the puck from the left defenseman. Capturing the moment Sam makes the pass, you hold your breath as Bucky swings, the buzzer sounds a split second after, the roar of the crowd loud behind you as Natasha jumps into your side her own yells of victory loud in your ear.
“He did it! Y/n he fucking did it!!” She screams shaking you.
You can’t find your voice as your camera shutters away, but the way your heart races, the smile parting your lips gives way to the emotion filling your chest.
“C’mon let’s go!” Natasha urges pulling you along to get the two of you out onto the ice.
You thought the excitement was palpable behind the glass, but it’s electric out on the ice with the celebrating team. You’re capturing as many images of the teams victory as you can before Natasha spots the guys urging you on. You let her go capturing the moment Steve gets her in his arms, the kiss the two share between them. You find Wilson next he’s all smiles at you and your camera as he glides towards you. You lower the lens momentarily to let him pull you in for a bone crushing hug, “you guys did it, I’m so proud of you Sammy!”
His lips press to your head, “it was all for you hotshot, I’ve got to say when your boys determined, he’s determined,” he grins as he pulls away to look down at you.
“It wasn’t just for me, it was for the fans, for the team.” You lamely argue.
His grin only grows, “yeah? Tell him that then.” And then he’s gliding off to the side towards where Natasha and Steve wait. Bucky stands feet away from you grin on his lips, his hair a sweaty mess, your camera comes up. Each shutter brings him closer to you till you have no other choice but to lower the device and take all of him in. He’s barely got his arms open enough before you’re eating up at the last foot between the two of you your arms going around him.
“You did it B, you won!”
His arms wrap tighter around you, his nose buried in your hair, “I told you hotshot, this one was for you and I meant it.”
You lean back taking in the right defenseman, there’s that smile, the one you always find directed at you. “You did, didn’t you,” you breathe unable to look away. “Guess the drinks really are on me tonight.”
He chuckles grin splitting his lips further, “don’t think that’ll be the only thing on you tonight,” he murmurs pulling you closer, his head lowering to yours, he stops just before his lips brush yours. “you gonna let me catch you hotshot?”
“Yeah B. I think I am.”
#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x you#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes au
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Washing Machine Heart 🩶 Pt.1
Mom’s Best-friend!Joel Miller x f!reader
Main Masterlist | Joel Miller Masterlist
Summary: Your Mom is not nice to you, her only Daughter, always picking on you whenever she can. To get back at her you decide to seduce and fuck her Highschool Best-friend Joel Miller. Oh she also has a crush on him so that’s a bonus.
Rating: 18+ mature content mdni!!!!
Word count: 3.5k
Warnings: no use of y/n, female reader, implied abuse, childhood trauma, alcohol, smut, reader has no name only nicknames, size difference, age gap, readers age is mentioned and Joel is more than double sooo, mommy issues, strained relationships, petty shit, cream pie, tittys, choking kind of, teasing, Joel is tiny bit Pervy, of course Daddy kink, unprotected p in v,
If I missed anything please let me know 🙏🏻
Authors note: I was mad so this is what I cooked up lol
Shoutout to @cafekitsune for the dividers 🫶🏻
Disclaimer: English is not my first language so if you come across mistakes it might be due to that. This is my first time writing smut sooooo be nice please. I’m totally here for constructive criticism or feedback on how to improve. In general I appreciate comments, likes and reblogs greatly. 🖤
Song’s I listened to while writing:
I Hate My Mom by GRLwood
Class of 2013 by Mitski
I hope ur miserable until ur dead by Nessa Barrett
Bubblegum Bitch by MARINA
Backstabber by Kesha
Jerk by Oliver Tree
You know exactly when the relationship between you and your mother started deteriorating- The day she decided to choose your loser Stepdad, the one she only dated for 4 years, over her own 8 year old daughter. From then on you took a backseat in her life yet she still expected you to take care of her all needs. You hate her for what she did and you miss her like a little kid. You had to drag her home when she drank too much, you can’t even remember how often that happened. Always having to jump in between that asshole and her fighting cuz even though she practically emotionally abandoned you, you still wanted to protect her from harm's way. She forced you to grow up so quickly, it’s her fault you never got a real childhood.
For years you accepted that this is normal. The screaming, the violence and the degrading words became a part of growing up. You were a kid but not clueless, someone who loves you wouldn’t have done all of this. And yet all of them tried so hard to make you shut up and believe it’s what you deserved.
Luckily what happened did not entirely break you. No, you grew into someone who fought for herself since no one ever did that.
Of course you hoped she might realize her mistakes, apologize and change but nothings new with her. She’s great at pretending to be a better person to the outside world, than she is in reality, behind closed doors the mask unveils an ugly woman. A narcissistic self absorbed monster that took all your joy away.
It’s pathetic considering how much she always talks about getting abused by her own father but instead of breaking the cycle she doubled down on it. Going as far as using that as an excuse for what she did to her own child.
She only kinda stopped the abuse once you no longer were a small child. Now that you could fight back she did not corner you anymore.
But just because she couldn’t hit you anymore doesn’t mean the picking on you stopped, no, it was her mission to rid you of the last remaining confidence and self love.
In each screaming match she tried so hard to gaslight you into believing you were crazy for feeling offended by her disgusting behavior.
One time you asked why she hit you as a little kid and the answer left you completely blown away. She expressed that you cried so much, and did it to provoke her. What else could she have possibly done other than raise her hand?
Or another time she refused to acknowledge that she hit you at all but a second later told you that perhaps if she would’ve done worse you would’ve turned out better.
At some point you stopped calling her Mom and only went with her name. You knew that it must hurt but did she really deserve that title after everything she did?
Now at 21 years old the relationship is just as rocky, not much has changed.
Your mom has basically zero friends, she’s a bitch of course no one would want to be too close, well except for Joel…..Joel Miller that somehow was her friend.
Perhaps only since they have known each other since High School, he might have felt some kind of obligation towards her due to that. She told you once that Joel was the boy every girl had a crush on with his whole guitar playing thing they all swooned over him.
Even now all those years later Joel was a beautiful specimen, tall, broad shoulders, huge hands, strong arms you’d like to be enveloped by, tanned freckled skin, a cute butt, gorgeous brown curls with slightly gray streaks showing his age, big brown eyes, a prominent nose and soft pillow like lips.
You understand why your Mom had a crush on him, any woman would bend over for him if he’d say so. She thought it was not too noticeable but unlike Joel you caught it immediately.
She made you the reason for her life being so shitty but now after years of torment you saw a chance at really giving her a reason to hate you. Maybe something is wrong with you for liking the idea of breaking her heart so much but you honestly couldn’t care less. The one you felt sorry for most was probably Joel; he would be the pawn in your deranged game without knowing.
As it turns out though Joel is not as innocent as expected, the more you tried to get closer the more you realized he might be easier to seduce than originally anticipated.
You started with small things like hugging him a bit longer than normally so he could feel you perky full tits squished against his chest. Touching his arms and squeezing them but not too much as if to draw attention to it. And from his reactions, he did not seem to mind.
You were not worried about your mother, she never was the most alert to begin with.
When Joel came over for a barbecue you used the time alone with him in the garden while your mother was in the kitchen preparing god knows what to impress him.
Joel and you had some interesting conversations.
“Soooo you work in contracting, right?” You asked him sweetly. Joel chuckled “Yeah sweetheart, I do. But ya know tha’ already, so why ask?” You played it off as much as you could “Just making sure you didn't decide to switch career paths in the time I haven’t seen you…” you look up at him through your lashes, cheekily biting your lip. Joel of course fell into the trap, his eyes going down to your plush lips in mere seconds. Got ya you dirty old men.
You stepped closer until you two were only a couple inches apart. His chest almost touched yours. In this position you really had to Crane your neck up to keep eye contact consistent.
“What are ya doing Baby,huh?” Joel tilted his head slightly down towards your face. You just giggled at him “Nothin Joel, just…” with that you put your hands on his wide chest ruining them down over his enticing slightly protruding belly. “I know you stare at my ass alllllll the time. I also know you like it when I walk close by you and graze you with my tits. My little skimpy outfits turn you on as well don’t they,huh Joel?” You smirk at him.
You can see how he clenches his jaw…ohhh yes you got him figured out.
He hisses low and menacing at you “You are a little slut ain’t ya, baby. Groping a man over double your age. Teasin me with those sugar tits and that tight lil ass….”
You can see his pupils dilate till his eyes look close to being completely blacked out. You muse “Yeah I’m a whore but you like that don’t you?” With that you cup his hard cock over his shorts he decided to wear today.
He gasps and immediately grips your wrist to yank those devilish hands away from his throbbing length. Especially when he hears your mother’s voice calling out from inside the house.
He backs off and tries to catch his breath as well as calm his raging hard on down to an unnoticeable minimum. Before he leaves to figure out what she called for he turns to you and lifts an accusing finger towards you.
“We ain’t done baby, ya gonna make it up to me for teasin and leavin me all high and dry, mkay?” He tilts his head almost to intimidate you but to no avail you’re just a massive brat “Hmmm sure Joeliii but i think your underwear is anything but dry.” You giggle and continue “Probably full of pre cum am I right,huh?”
Joel can’t believe what he’s gotten himself into and just shakes his head while turning to the house.
Somehow he made it through the barbecue without your mother noticing any tension between Joel and you. Stupid of her but good for you.
In the weeks after that afternoon you and him kept secretly meeting up. Most of the time at his house or he’d pick you up with his truck to drive you somewhere where he could have you without any distractions, of course when your mom wasn’t home. She might be stupid but even to her it would be weird why you suddenly start taking trips with Joel and she should not be suspicious.
Also during the talks with Joel that happened when taking a break between fucking it was once again made clear that he for whatever reason had not an ounce of knowledge about your mom’s crush.
The plan for how the reveal should go was set in motion. Your mom was driving out to one of those weird grocery stores that sold the health powders she drowned herself in, in hopes of making her more pretty from the inside out but to no avail the rot can’t be reversed.
You knew how long that would take her, it gave you enough time to fuck Joel in her favorite spot on the couch. Yeah petty and perhaps childish but you don’t care make her remember how you defiled her lovely couch with the man she was in love with.
Joel showed up 10 minutes after she drove off. You barely got the door closed behind him before he pounced on you. It’s been a few weeks since you fucked him last, you wanted him to be desperate for it so he’ll might be more focused on pounding you then notice that your mother is returning.
He immediately slotted his lips over yours, his hands grabbing at your hips with urgency.
You spin with him attached to your lips so you can guide him where you want him, on the couch. His breathing is already elevated and by the significantly evident bulge he’s massively turned on. Good, the less rational thinking the better.
While you push him towards the couch his lips slip down your jaw and land on your throat kissing and sucking all over. Between those kisses he huffs “Babyyy - I’ve - missed - ya so - much…” you just hum as an answer and when the back of his knees hit the edge of the couch he’s forced to unlatch from you.
He falls back, his head hitting the soft pillows so he’s only slightly elevated. You wink at him “yeah I bet you have and most of all He has missed me huh? Looks almost painful, did you not touch yourself in meantime?”
He sounds a bit whiny in his response “No Baby haven’t touched myself, saved it all for ya greedy little pussy.” Even when you think to have the upper hand he reminds you how different it actually is. “Come on baby, why don’t ya take of that lil skirt an’ take seat on my lap.” While grabbing at his crotch.
Your mouth is watering but there’s no time today to get your mouth on him like you usually love to. At his dirty words you can feel some wetness gush from your pulsing cunt, coating the inside of your thighs. As requested you slip your flowy skirt down your legs.
Joel let's out a gasp „No panties baby? Ya naughty little slut.“ he chuckles and you retort „Don’t need them if I’m with you, so why make it harder than it needs to be?“ at that Joel can only nod.
„Come here Sweet Moon Love.“ he demands.
You get on your hands and knees between his spread legs that lay on the couch. Slowly crawling towards him teasing him with your tits that are almost spilling out of your skimpy tank top.
When you finally sit down on his jeans-covered cock he lets out a sound of relief. Your knees on either side of his hips and his hands immediately find home on your hips and ass, kneading and caressing the skin there.
„Fuck Moon ya turn me on so much take of that goddamn top and show me those sweet sugar tits.“
So you do, slipping it over your head and throwing it somewhere behind you. He’s not surprised by the lack of a bra. He knows you hate wearing them and if he’s honest he loves that a lot, easier access and all.
Joel’s hands go from your hips up to the tits he loves so much. Carefully touching them, his warm hands and the wonderful feeling making it unable not to moan. Swiping his calloused fingers over your nipples, twisting them with determination causing you to keen.
You start arching your back towards his groping hands. His administrations cause the pull in your lower stomach to Continuously get stronger. You are convinced his jeans are covered in your juices and without realizing you’ve started to rub your bare pussy over his bulge with vigor.
„Joel enough I need you inside me, now!“ You don’t even wait for a response, lifting your hips and loosening his belt and unbuttoning the buttons of his jeans. With his help you drag his pants down but only so much that you are able to pull his throbbing cock out of the confines that are his blue boxers and you can see a huge dark spot where pre cum leaked, making you look at Joel chuckling „You really want it huh? Daddy” with a sweet lilt that makes his dick Twitch in your hands.
He just groans “Baby Moon if ya don’t sit down on my cock right now I’ll do it myself and I won’t give ya time to adjust.” He threatens but it really only turns you on more.
You peer up at the clock and see that you only have about 15 minutes left.
You take your original position and when his warm length slips through your moist folds his pre cum mixing with your own juices to create an addicting squelching sound.
At this point the dark hair nestling at the base of his cock and his happy trail are completely soaked.
“Gosh, Sweetheart she’s gushing all over me, put it in. She wants my cock don’t keep her waitin” you love when he talks in this way about your cunt, makes you wetter if that’s even possible.
You lift up a bit again and take hold of his length with one hand, the other on his chest to stabilize yourself. Dragging his leaking head through your glossy folds before lining him up with your gushing opening. You take one deep inhale cuz you know it’ll be a stretch even with how often you've done this.
Before sinking down on him you look at him there’s guilt somewhere deep in your conscience but you shake your head, you ain’t backing out now.
You slowly start to sink down when Joel decides it’s not quick enough so he grips your hips and in one swift fast motion sheets his huge dick inside your tight cunt.
“Ahhh..-ah J-Joel what the fuck” you hiss slapping his chest hard for being so impatient.
He huffs “Sorry Baby but Daddy has waited long enough for Her, just shush.” He actually has the audacity to shush you.
You get used to the feeling of being so filled to the brim and slide back & forth for a moment.
Then you put your feet down flat on the couch and grip the headrest behind him before starting to fuck him in earnest. Up and down at first slowly but steadily you get quicker and harder. Joel can’t even speak unless you count his obnoxiously loud moaning and growling.
“Yeah how you like that old man, hmm Daddy you're all quiet this pussy shut you up good, huh?” You wonder and out of nowhere one of Joel’s big hands grips your throat making you slow your movements to a minimum. He pulls your face toward his and grunts “Baby Moon ya need to be put in your place, ya bratty ass is treading on some mighty thin ice.”
He gives you one hard peck and then shoves your face in his neck. You don’t complain, you love when he’s so rough with you and his musky masculine smell is your favorite.
Joel pulls his legs up and plants his feet on the couch just like you did and then he starts to relentlessly push up into you at an alarming speed so hard that if it weren’t for the arm pinning you to his chest you’d fall off.
“Jo-Joel….Joel it’s so good ah…don’t stop” you babble in his ear and opposite to his harsh pounding he soothes “Shhh Baby I know, I know it’s so much for ya and Her. But listen to how much she’s enjoying it.”
And he’s right besides the obscene “plap, plap, plap” of skin hitting skin you can hear the wet squelching from the place you're both connected. “I’m close baby, where?” He asks while slipping a hand between your bodies to touch your neglected clit and immediately your whiny moans get even louder “I-in…inside Daddy. Pleaseee cum inside me.”
You beg and he loves that “Hmm yeah, ya wanna be filled up Baby?” He questions “God yes Daddy fill me up, please pleasee” you want nothing more than to feel him spill inside of you.
Seems that when Joel told you he was kinda deaf in his right ear it wasn’t a lie or maybe the plan of making him so desperate to fuck you that he won’t hear the door unlocking worked out.
But you can hear the slight clicking and the closing of the door. Unlike what you expect she does not start screaming, no, she’s eerily quiet. Perhaps it’s due to not having realized who exactly you're screwing as if there’s no tomorrow or simple shock.
Joel under you seems to have reached his end and without any preamble he starts shooting his warm cum deep inside your tight hole. The warm sensation combined with his unrelenting rubbing your clit pushes you over the finish line too. With that you pull up from his neck and drag him up as well, crossing your arms around his neck and kissing him.
You know she is right there at the threshold, you don’t care and to rub it in even more you say “Thank you Daddy, I love you.” And as if he knows his role Joel answers “I love you too little Moon.”
And that might have been the final straw, she speaks up and it flips out into incoherent screaming. Joel is immediately startled; he lightly pushes you off, quickly tugging himself back into his jeans and getting up to explain. You however get up slowly and put your top and skirt back on.
With the lack of panties you can feel his spend leaking out of you and you’re sure there’s very evident stains on Joel’s jeans that your mother must see.
The back and forth they must be having doesn’t even register to you. The blissful buzzing from the orgasm and the satisfaction of having succeeded in hurting her are making you all dozzy.
But then she comes charging at you screaming in your face “You’re smiling, you think this is funny??? I knew you were a bitch who only ruins everything, you are a worthless piece of shit a absolute waste of space” she’s so hysterical but you don’t care, it’s good she’s showing her true colors for Joel to see.
She continues “You are disgraceful and shameful for the entire family. I want you out of the house now. You are dead to me.” She probably thinks those words could hurt but it’s nothing compared to all the horrible things she did in the past. You just smirk at her nodding which infuriates her more than any comeback could.
With that you slip past her, Joel looks completely stunned by what just unfolded before his eyes. You don’t acknowledge him much, quickly skipping up the stairs,entering your room, grabbing a suitcase and filling it with the most important items. Then shuffling out of your room locking it behind you. You heave the suitcase down the stairs, no sign of Joel all you can hear is her crying in the living room, it amuses you, not an ounce of sympathy left for her. You don’t bother saying bye just open the front door and out you are.
The surprise is waiting in front of the house, Joel, he didn’t leave but instead waited for you.
He looks at you “Did it mean anything to you at all, or was it just a big joke?” He doesn’t look hurt, just confused. You close the distance between him and you “I wish it wouldn’t but it’s not possible to not feel anything, look at you Joel you’re a so beautiful so caring of course I fell for you.” He nods and takes your suitcase out of your hand. “Wh..what are you doing ?” You question “I’m taking ya home Moon, think I’d let you run around these streets? Get in the car” he urges.
And you do, when he drives off you don’t look back once.
Npt: @joelmillerisapunk @aurorawritestoescape @milla-frenchy @joelslegalwhre @thundermartini @studioghibelli @sizzlingcloudmentality @vivian-pascal @strang3lov3 @xdaddysprincessxx @mountainsandmayhem @mrsmando @joelsgreys @janaispunk @sizzlingcloudmentality @the-mandawhor1an @clawdee @penvisions 🩶
Please don’t repost, copy, translate, or feed into any AI, thank you 🙏🏻
#Joel Miller#joel miller smut#joel miller one shot#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x f!reader#pedro pascal#pedro pascal characters#moms best friend!Joel#My Writing#Mina’s Writing
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ghoap meet-cute (?) AU idea
but soap’s beige flag is that whenever he gets a spam/scam call he likes to pick up—despite knowing that will probably get him on some list that will only result in more calls—and answer with the most absurd thing he can think of off the top of his head at a given moment. he’s feigned implicating telemarketers in murder, pretended to be the proud owner of various nonexistent businesses with odd names, tried to debate stupid topics, and so on. it’s harmless, and it’s fun, and it’s not a habit he thinks he needs to break.
when he gets an unexpected call one afternoon from an unknown number, his response is just the same as always—this time it’s some miserable pun of a mortuary name that leaves his mouth like it’s second nature the moment he picks up.
except this time it isn’t a scam call, and instead it’s someone on the other end who sounds like they’re trying to hide a disbelieving laugh when they tell soap, sorry, must’ve dialled the wrong number.
hearing that voice, deep and pleasantly rough, soap scrambles to keep the person on the line just to listen more. he quickly explains that no, it was a joke, he just does that to annoy telemarketers, it was a stupid pun anyway, so sorry about that. soap isn’t sure the words are all that comprehensible, but he’s desperate, and that voice is attractive, and maybe it’s the wrong number but hey, i can still talk.
and they do. only for a few minutes this time, but even without names they mutually agree to save one another’s numbers, and thus begins a long-winded saga of somehow catching feelings despite not knowing one another’s real names (they only ever got as far as ghost and soap) and never seeing each other’s faces, but it happens. they make a habit of greeting each other with stupid puns, and then they make a habit of flirting, and then soap has to bite his tongue every time he has a thought of maybe asking to meet.
he never gets the chance to ask, though, because as he’s walking through the city, running errands while on the phone with ghost, soap wanders into a quiet cafe, and while he’s standing in line it’s as if he’s suddenly hearing double. soap turns to find the second source, and sees a man sitting at a table by the window, that same voice telling the same story soap is listening to from his phone.
soap risks making an excuse to hang up, forgoes ordering something out of fear ghost might leave, and forces his legs to move toward the table with the man who definitely has to be ghost, now looking a little sullen that his conversation had been ended. he slides into the seat across from ghost, immediately earning himself an apprehensive, incredibly judgemental look.
i’m john, soap says. ghost furrows his brow. from the mortuary?
it takes a moment for the recognition to register on ghost’s face, but the moment it does is glorious.
maybe soap should have asked about meeting up after all—if only to have been able to witness that smile much, much sooner.
and to think it had all started with a wrong number.
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Steve and Eddie being teenage boys (even in their twenties, even though they technically are no longer teenagers), a list that I've been making in my head (some of them are stupid and some of them are sweet, but this is a long list, be warned):
Steve teaching Eddie how to burp the alphabet after drinking soda. He's phenomenal at it. Like...almost disgustingly so. It ends up turning into a one up competition pretty fast after that.
Eddie who knows how to drag race and takes Steve on ridiculously fast drives down empty streets at night (when Steve's had a terrible night). He steps on the gas and goes: "Weeee!!!" as they speed. (Please don't speed. It is dangerous. But for the sake of entertaining their pea brains, this is what they do.)
Eddie and Steve who have been participating in a several month long tagging game. They slap each other on the back of shoulders as hard as they possibly can before skittering off like a little goblin.
Steve and Eddie think it's soooo fucking funny to blow up condoms like balloons when they're stoned.
Steve and Eddie who get stoned and they go shop for munchies at the local grocery store, both hysterically giggling at figuring out how to be "normal" people in public. (They are failing miserably.)
Steve who makes Eddie play basketball with him sometimes. And then he purposefully tosses the ball at Eddie rather than the basket. It devolves into wresting in the grass, heads in elbows, knuckles across scalps, kicking each other in the shins.
One time, Steve falls asleep at Eddie's on the couch. And instead of being all sweet and doting, Eddie finds a marker and draws a penis on Steve's face. He gets water poured on his head the next time he falls asleep at Steve's as payback.
Steve and Eddie comforting each other through nightmares and hardships and healing injuries, both in sort of constipated, mumbled ways. Pats to the back and leaning in close to each other, resting heads on shoulders. Passing cigarettes or beers back and forth just to pass the time, not really talking. Exchanging words afterwards like, "You're a great friend," and "You're the best person I know." Because they both need that and recognize that, even outside of the petty, childish things they do to each other.
Eddie, who understands that the pool at Steve's is a sore spot, instead of prodding them to get in, he plans out a whole water balloon fight to stave off the summer heat.
Steve, who knows that music has been a source of calm for Eddie over the years, makes sure there's always a cassette that Eddie can play in case it gets too quiet.
Eddie and Steve who shit talk each other in the arcade, beating each other's high scores if only to rile the other one up.
Steve who always checks Eddie's ID before he goes into the adult only room in Family Video. Despite knowing that Eddie is definitely over the age of eighteen. Sometimes he denies Eddie entry in front of Keith just to make him pout. (He thinks it's cute.)
Eddie and Steve watching porn together, criticizing the moans the entire time because they know for sure it's fake. And on the same note of moans, Eddie who gets a call from Wayne and Steve fake moans in the background the entire time. Steve gets a call from his parents and Eddie shouts really loud in the background for Steve to pass the joint back. They just glare at each other before getting in another tag fight throughout wherever they're at.
Eddie who goes into Family Video after Steve strikes out again. Who just walks up to the counter and starts acting like one of those girls, twirling his hair and pouting his lips and blinking his eyes, making his voice high pitched. (It gets Steve to giggle instead of pout, so Eddie calls it a win.)
Eddie guzzling an entire can of Coke and then spraying it out of his nose when Steve makes him laugh too hard. Steve's never made anybody laugh that hard.
Steve and Eddie who claim it's not gay to make their boners kiss. I mean...what? Who said that?
Steve and Eddie who play-punch a little too hard when playing punch buggy on vacation.
Speaking of vacation, Steve and Eddie going to a beach over the summer. They chase each other up and down the sand. They roll off of the sand hills. Eddie buries Steve in the sand and applies sunscreen to his face as he just accepts his fate. Steve helps Eddie make a sandcastle, a secret talent of his being how structurally sound he can build one.
Steve and Eddie playing with Legos while talking shit about Family Video customers. They toss Sour Patch Kids into each other's mouths as they talk. Sometimes hitting each other in the face purposefully.
Steve and Eddie who get drunk one night and go catch a wild possum. Robin screams at them to put it back because, "No, you dinguses, that is not a cat!"
Eddie and Steve taking care of each other on bad pain days. Trying to entertain the other with stupid jokes or shitty movies or gossip.
Eddie sharing his uncle with Steve when he finds out that Mr. and Mrs. Harrington are terrible motherfuckers. Who makes sure Steve is comfortable in his home around Wayne.
Steve conspiring with Wayne to make sure that Eddie always has the best birthday parties. Because the one thing he really held onto from his King Steve years was how to throw a small get together, and how, especially, to make it extremely awesome and memorable.
Steve who gets Eddie new albums he's been eyeing for his birthday. Ones Eddie knows he'd never be able to afford on his own, always a little sullen when he looks at the price. Steve who still has access to his dad's credit card and will max it out just for Eddie to get his fill.
Eddie makes homemade things for Steve's birthday. Cards and trinkets and drawings—things Steve's old high school buddies never considered as gifts, even though they have the most impact on Steve, even though they matter the most.
Steve and Eddie who love each other, insurmountably. Despite sometimes being major buttheads to each other.
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