#insomnia makes me productive
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minisugakoobies · 2 years ago
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Closer - Masterlist | KNJ, JJK
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Pairing: Namjoon x Reader x Jungkook
Genre: smut, friends to lovers, there was only one bed!, Reunion!AU
Rating: M (18+)
Series Warnings: unrequited crushes becoming requited, 190811 Jungkook and platinum blonde Namjoon are the visuals, also both are gym rats so
. think “thick,”excessive use of “Noona,” needy Jungkook, “baby girl” Namjoon agenda, poly relationship, each chapter will have specific smut warnings
Word Count: 5k so far
Disclaimer: NSFW, obviously I don’t own BTS - they just inspire me
Summary: During your college reunion weekend, one unbelievably hot evening brings you and your old friends Namjoon and Jungkook together, in ways you've only dreamed of. Weeks later, you can't let the memory of that night go. Can the three of you get closer?
A/N: Thought I should make a little ML for this miniseries to keep them all together! 💕
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Part One: No Regrets
One hot night spent lying between your friends Jungkook and Namjoon brings old feelings to light. “Do you have any regrets, Noona?”
Part Two: Together
There’s no holding back tonight, as you and your old friends Jungkook and Namjoon decide to do something about your regrets. Together.
Part Three: No Looking Back
You can't forget the memory of that night. Neither can they. Can the three of you get closer?
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Masterlist 💜 Find me on AO3 💜 
© 2022-23 by sunshinerainbowsbts/minisugakoobies. Crossposted to AO3. Please do not copy or repost.
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bleaksqueak · 2 months ago
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Insomnia is letting up off and on, but I'm still super jelly brained from it case in point, I want to continue back with posting WIPs for the aired pages, but I can't remember what page I left off on now lmao (guess I'll have to dig through my blog to check... eesh. at least it's decently organized by tags?) Not a result of goo brain, really, but equally "AUGH" is that I let my screen protector go for too long without replacing it and now it's slick as snot and I don't have a replacement handy to put on it. This isn't a resulting consequence of goo brain but it does mean I'm going to be trying to draw without any traction while I'm already loopy. Good times ahead!
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#shut up pu#I"ve had problems with insomnia my whole life so I'm sadly used to this#it comes and it goes#and right now it's in the middle of a big angry come#what do you mean that wording is atrocious??#it gets the point across#ordered a new screen for the draw slab so I've at least been proactive in fixing the problem#the only other problem is I hate drawing on brand new fresh screens too lol bad finger feel#only the middle screen is good for both fingies and pens#anyway the parts of chapter 3 I really love are coming up over the horizon#part of me does wish I would have tweaked the pacing of chapter 3 a little when realizing the usual posting schedule wasn't going to work#after real life delays all butted into production time bc chapter 3 was still paced for the 2 - 3 pages a week schedule#reading it all at once it still carries that pacing but I do feel a bit bad about the way it has felt at once a week#very occasionally twice lol#but I'm just a stickler for pacing so it bothers me personally probably more than it bothers literally anyone#knowing what it's meant to feel like on the proper release schedule vs. the slower release schedule is largely my own problem#and I'm feeling that extra hard right now because I'm having to do prep work for designing and asseting a new set#which saves a huge amount of time in the long run but slows things down in the immediate now#aka: I want to draw characters and story wahhh why am I making set pieces#also hey where the fuck's that stupid fox at he's even in the story synopsis write up where is he#get in the story proper you piece of shit#hello I am sleep deprived and rambling about comic production how are you doing
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bmpmp3 · 4 months ago
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i was watching a music video for a japanese song and it had built in youtube english captions so i went to turn those on but then i saw that there was like an option for "English" and then a second option for "English (Canada)" and i realized in a few seconds it was just a workaround to having two sets of english captions, one with colour changes in the lettering and one without for accessibility (the canada one was the non-fancy lettering) but for a moment i was living in a world where they were making dedicated canadian english translations for things..... measuring temperature in celsius and height in feet...... paying with loonies and toonies... going to the WASHROOM
#pencil crayons for colored pencils is a favourite but its mostly just an ontario thing tho from what ive heard LOL#calling electricity hydro is another good one. although that also depends on province <3 ontario and i think BC? and maybe more#sorry im ontarian. you can make fun of me for it its okay.#you know sometimes i think about attempts at 'canada english' settings in word processors and stuff#they always suck ass. because every person in this god damn country uses whatever word and spelling they want LOL#like theres some general likelihoods like colour and favourite are common. but centre or center? its like 50-50#i personally use both. depending on i dont know. context? the phase of the moon and stars?#theatre and theatre i see both as well and also personally use both but i have like specific rules for myself for some reason#i use theatre for playhouses and theater for movie theaters. i dont know why#and dont get me started on measurements. thats another combo of context and personal preference#people who work more in like trades switch a lot because of product labels but tend to lean more imperial#people who work in like i dunno. chemistry or something probably use a lot of metric#the average person working in neither? honestly they'll probably say both in the same sentence at least where i live#when installing art basically everyone uses both inches and cms depending on which ones more convenient on the ruler LOL#our drivers licenses in ontario say our heights in cm but literally no one can picture it with the cm measurement because#colloquially everyone says heights in feet and inches. its fine. its fine#edit: WAIT i got so distracted by measurement bullshit i forgot to mention the song. it was insomnia by eve#good tune as usual of eve and also a really beautifully animated and emotionally intense music video
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morrigan-sims · 8 months ago
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To anyone who's ever read my story: Thank you, and I'm so sorry I haven't posted anything in ages. I really, really, really want to keep working on it, I just kinda hit a wall with where to go next, and that has been killing me for months now.
(Basically, I have the entire last half or third of the story plotted out, but aside from a few scattered plot points, I don't know how to do the setup to get there. And the harder I try to brainstorm the emptier my brain gets. So I've kinda just stalled.)
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makeitpoppy · 9 months ago
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about the last thing i reblogged, the stress one
YOU GUYS
i've always been a sensitive human bean in terms of allergies and having sensitive skin, AND i already knew im basically a little walking bundle of stressed out angry nerves
but my body literally decided to rebel against me and let me tell you, one more problem and im going to wrap myself in bubble wrap or become the modern real life bubble boy
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opens-up-4-nobody · 10 months ago
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...
#hello darkness my old friend. I have insomnia again#it seems i wont get back to sleep. making this the 4th night in a row of 4 to 5hrs sleep. woof#is it insomnia or am i on the bleeding edge of hyp0mania? idk its weird. i can feel the strain in my head#my thoughts dont connect as well. its like im being pulled in two directions. my brain becoming spaghettified. growing thin around the#middle. but im not as tired as one might expect. ive been pretty productive and optimistic but anxiety and internal restlessness are up#like im tired but also i need to get up and pace around. maybe jump up and down. maybe run in circles.#the energy comes in waves. sitting in lectures or sitting for the extended addition of l0tr has been somewhat unbearable#bc im so contained. i would not ever get up and walk around while those things were happening but i desperately wanted to#ugh. whats my problem? who's to say. could also b the medication. i see the psychiatrist next week and i think ill beg to b put back on#lam1ctal. just bc when i was taking it on a super low does i had a week or feeling the most normal i think i ever have in my life#anxiety and evil thoughts were so small and i felt happy in a way im not sure i ever have been#like i think under normal circumstances i just have a low capacity for joy. at most i feel neutral. like i was telling my friends how i#might do some field work in winter and they were enthusiastic abt it and i kno y bc it sounds cool but idk i just dont feel anything abt it#i cant see past the pain it will take to get there. and i mean mood wise i feel alright on 4bilify like in a nutral way but stable isnt#the same as feeling happy. but maybe its all just in my head. 25mg lam1ctal shouldnt b enough to b effective#but idk i think im just sensitive to the chemicals in my body. including hormone fluctuations. idk. i hope she lets me switch.#itll b a pain in the ass to readjust in terms of going off what im on now and it might not work#but theres literature on retrying lamicta1 and they say to avoid inflammatory reactions in the first 2 months. which i did not do. oops#not that i was trying. i didnt think abt it until id had a million holes poked in my skin and was experiencing a mild tatt00 allergy#ugh. anyway. tbh id prefer this being hyp0mania vs insomnia bc then at least i can continue to function a bit during the day#ive never done anything that wild while hyp0manic aside from injure myself from over exercising and make bad choices in how i spend time#ie become insane abt something and not b able to think abt anything else. ugh. and i guess at this point ive tentatively accepted the idea#of being bip0lar. so i swear to christ if i was misdiagnosed ill b so mad. its just that if i fill out an 4dhd and bip0lar checklist. i#get a way heavy positive with bip0lar and the 4dhd is meh. so i think i just have overlap in symptoms due to dyslex1a and 4utism#ugh. me and my collection of diagnoses. so it goes#unrelated
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glitchtricks94 · 1 year ago
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Not me hiding from my moots at 4 in the morning because I can't sleep.
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kranklys · 8 months ago
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It's currently 3:40 am on a school night, I'm tired asf, and I have tried to go to sleep for the past 4 hours. I haven't been able to sleep properly for the past like 3 days. I have given up on sleep at this point. I love being an insomniac 😍
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dwaekkicidal · 4 months ago
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Curly Hair Routine with Changbin
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ËšÊšâ™ĄÉžËš summary: Teaching Changbin how to take care of his curls. based off this post/request!
ËšÊšâ™ĄÉžËš word count: 1k (how did i do this.. i thought it was like 500)
ËšÊšâ™ĄÉžËš warnings: none really :3 just fluff and mentioned that reader has longish, curly hair
ËšÊšâ™ĄÉžËš notes: i saw a few moots repost that prompt and i have curly hair (like 3A/3B?) that i've been learning to take care of the last few years so :3 thought this was cyuuute!!! also probably gonna write chris' later today/tomorrow! (my insomnia came back so.. we'll see when it gets done LMFAO)
@chaeryred (also @httpdwaekki cause hehe) i hope you guys like it >< thought it came off a little messy but i still think its pretty cute
DO NOT republish or translate+post my work!
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"YAH! IT'S TOO COLD"
"SIT STILL! I JUST HAVE TO WASH IT OUT-"
"NO!!!! MOM!!! HEEEEEEELP-"
After wrestling your boyfriend like a cat taking a bath, you managed to wash the rest of the conditioner out of his hair and wrap his head up in a towel. You sent him to sit on the floor in the living room while you went to grab all your products from your bedroom. Once you returned, you were met with the biggest pout you've ever seen mixed with the nastiest side eye known to man. His head is almost completely wrapped up in a towel, minus the big circle where part of his face peeks out, and his arms are crossed sassily.
You couldn't help but smile and chuckle, shaking your head as you dropped the products and tools on the couch. You sit directly behind him, putting your legs on either side of his shoulders and leaning him into you. He shivers and your heart pangs a little, but you lean forward and wrap your arms around him and rub them soothingly. A quiet 'hmph!' comes from him and you laugh again.
"I'm sorry, baby. You said you wanted to do my hair routine just like me. And I always end it off with rinsing with cold water." Your fingers sneak into the hole in the towel and pull it back some, exposing his cheeks more as well as some of his wet hair. He makes the angry noise again and throws a small fit, turning away from you and tugging the towel back to its previous position in defiance.
You peck his cheek a few times and combine it with a mumbled apology. Then a small smile forms on his face and you start ruffing the towel, rubbing your hands back and forth and using it to poke fun at him while also starting to dry his hair off. Giggles erupt from the both of you as he drops the tough act and reacts to the ticklish feeling, his distinct giggle ringing through your ears in the best way possible.
Once you both have calmed down, and he's no longer feigning distress, you start to gently dry his hair. "I brought a mirror too." His hair is mostly dry and you grab your brush before realizing that Changbin's eyes have been glued to the show on TV. This was supposed to be a learning experience so you wanted him to watch, but it was also endearing to see him trust you so blindly that he resorts to iPad-baby tendencies.
"Are you gonna watch me do it so you can learn, or was this just an excuse for you to get pampered?" You tease, tilting his head back gently so he can look you in the eyes. He smiles apologetically and reaches for the mirror, "Sorry, Bunny. Got a little distracted hehe. I am your apprentice tonight! Teach away, Jagi." You smile widely and lean down again to place a kiss on his lips. One he reciprocates it before fixing his posture and placing the mirror in position.
He then lowers the television down and sits there patiently, allowing you to take him through the steps and using the mirror to peek at what your hands are doing. You start it off by showing him the products and explaining what they do and then tell him how you're supposed to use them, using a strand of his hair as an example.
Each step doesn't take long, thanks to the fact that he memorized the first few steps of your routine; the brushing and cream application. What you did explain was the styling techniques. He could have just left it as is and not done anything, or he could do what you do and finger-coil each strand.
He had seen how you slaved over your hair for over an hour each time you finger-coiled it and was dreading his experience to be similar to that. But thanks to how short his hair was compared to yours, it was a cakewalk. However, when he tried to coil one strand himself, his fingers did manage to get tangled in each other a few times... but you have to experience something to really learn from it! And the texture of the gel you used seemed to drive him crazy, but he got used to it eventually.
Then it was onto drying! You had brought out the diffuser attachment- or.. what Changbin called the "claws of death," for your hair dryer. He had seen you use it countless times before, but it looked like a jumbled mess of things from the outside and he never knew if there was a technique to it or if it was just random movements.
After teaching him the tips and tricks you used for extra volume and just how to diffuse his hair in general on a small section of his hair, you watched proudly as he dried the rest of his hair on his own with little to no problems. You did a dramatic reveal, wiggling your fingers and adding a "Tada~" when he looked into the mirror for the final time.
He stared for a while, eyes tracing the unfamiliar, defined curls on his head. They were pretty, and you have literally never seen his hair like that before. But what really made it worth it was his reaction. A big smile grew on his face and he turned to you, crawling up the couch to give you a big kiss. "Thank you, Bunny."
"Of course, baby. You look good like this." You smiled and admired your handiwork for a while until you remembered that today was supposed to be your wash day in the first place.
"Okay!! Time for me to wash my hair now." You peck him on the lips and playfully shove him onto the couch, running away after. The pitter-patter of his steps chases after you and he wraps his hands around you once the water is turned back on.
"Wait. I want to do it!" He smiles widely despite the unsure face you make. But he's your Binnie, so it's kind of hard not to cave in. You agree and resume the same position he had earlier, sitting on the tile with your neck resting on the edge and your head hovering over the big bowl of the tub. He steals another kiss before gathering your hair products and directing the water to your head.
"Don't worry, Bunny. I'm a professional at this~"
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Taglist:
@valkyriexo @lunearta @jabmastersupriseee @rylea08
@yaorzu-blog @amararosesblog @jiminssluttyminx @clemissleepy
@miss-daisy04 @kittyxnoa @dwaekkiiracha
@bubblerizz
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ghettogirly · 5 months ago
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armando headcanons for when it’s that time of the month ? đŸ˜«
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𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎 𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐀𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍!
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áŻŸ synopsis. it’s that time of the month, what would he be like?
áŻŸ theme: fluff with a little bit of crack and suggestive.
áŻŸ format: headcanon.
áŻŸ warnings: the topic of having a period?
áŻŸ authors note: thanks for requesting! i’ve got such a good story that im doing for you guys, stay tuned!!
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[đŸ•·ïž] 𝐏𝐇𝐘𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋: 𝐡𝐹𝐰 đČ𝐹𝐼 𝐚𝐜𝐭.
â™ĄïžŽ Armando would initially be surprised at the level of pain that would occur from your period, he’s obviously went through a lot too but nothing could apparently amount to this.
â™ĄïžŽ He would at first stare at you, trying to figure out how severe the pain really is.
â™ĄïžŽ That wasn’t until you shouted at him to go get you some painkillers was when he stopped analysing you.
â™ĄïžŽ In his mind, he didn’t think the pain was AS bad as you were making it out to be. (men..)
â™ĄïžŽ Nevertheless, he got you some painkillers and returned back home. Giving you them along with a glass of water.
â™ĄïžŽ After an hour, you felt better, relieved even. Apologising got him for your aggressive behaviour, he shrugged it off. Not fazed at all.
â™ĄïžŽ He would then begin to stock up on sanitary towels, any period product you needed, he had. You found it unnecessary but he called it being prepared.
â™ĄïžŽHe set you baths, had a section of painkillers in the kitchen, even did face masks or skincare with you whenever you had acne on your face due to your hormones.
â™ĄïžŽ And one night, he asked. “¿Significa esto que podemos dejarte embarazada ahora?”
â™ĄïžŽ You nearly spat your drink out.
[đŸ•·ïž] 𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋: 𝐡𝐹𝐰 đČ𝐹𝐼 đŸđžđžđ„.
â™ĄïžŽ he would be very tuned in with your emotions.
â™ĄïžŽ as a guy with not many words and just likes observing, he would completely tell when you’ve started or it’s about to come on.
â™ĄïžŽ the mood swings, increased irritation and insomnia that you was having a week before? yeah, he knows.
â™ĄïžŽ so, when it does happen, he’s genuinely prepared for all the emotions that come with it.
â™ĄïžŽ he can be a quiet person but he’s always ready to have a good, deep conversation if you desperately need it.
â™ĄïžŽ If you’re having a bad day and you come back home crying, he’s already got your back. Embracing you in a warm hug while you cry on his chest.
â™ĄïžŽ after you’ve calmed down, he would surprise you with a bouquet of red roses and your favourite food.
â™ĄïžŽ it was almost as if he knew you was feeling this way.
â™ĄïžŽ you guys cannot convince me otherwise that he isn’t a soft person when it comes to the people he loves.
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[đŸ•·ïž] 𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒:
“¿Significa esto que podemos dejarte embarazada ahora?“ - Does this mean we can get you pregnant now?
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𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓:
@milliumizoomi @shurisgf @deadpool15 @wizewhispers @loakswifesworld @sarcasticbitchsblog @5tarlan7 @amplifiedmoan
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taylorsgfz · 22 days ago
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Insomnia ♡
— taylor x gf !
summary: taylor suffers from a terrible insomnia and takes the opportunity to write a song about her girlfriend.
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That Taylor Swift suffered terribly with insomnias wasn't news to anyone, not even for her most recent fans.
Usually, her insomnias reflected in miserably unhappy thoughts or in new songs for her albums. At that moment, laying next to you - who were sleeping peacefully - Taylor could only smile.
— This happens once every few lifetimes. — the blondie whispered and took her hand to your face to gently caress you.
And as most of her songs emerged, her sentence was the motto for a musical idea. That and the sudden urge to write about her girlfriend.
Taylor kissed your forehead while you were still sound asleep and got up. Benjamin, that was sleeping in your bed aswell, also got up to follow Taylor downstairs.
Olivia jumped from the couch hearing Taylor come down and Meredith lifted her head but was sleeping again in the next second.
The blondie went to the music room in her home and sat on the pouf with her guitar and her notebook on her lap.
She started to write the line she whispered to your ear minutes before and added some rhythm. The lyrics came up in her head and she would ocasionally get up to get to the kitchen and eat or drink something.
You eventually woke up in your room after not feeling Taylor's warmth beside you. You rubbed your eyes a little and yawned a few times before you could make yourself get up to check on your girlfriend.
Meredith got up when she saw you and started to ask for cuddles. Taylor felt a little jealous that Meredith clearly prefered you over her but she couldn't judge the kitty.
— Tay? — you called her when you didn't see any lights on.
Taylor didn't answer but after some efforts, you could hear the guitar playing in the sound proof music room. So you just followed the music while holding Meredith in your arms.
— Hey, babe. — Taylor smiled when she heard you.
— Did I wake you up? — she asked and tapped her lap a few times after dropping the guitar on the floor.
You and Meredith went to sit on her lap then.
— No no, I just can no longer sleep without feeling you by my side. And then I got worried so I wanted to check if everything was okay.
— Everything's fine, babe, I just couldn't sleep for the life of me and I had an idea for a song. — Taylor pointed at her notebook laying on the floor.
You grabbed the notebook and read the loose lyrics that were written. You were still a little sleepy to be able to interpret exactly what Taylor meant but you had no more doubts that song was about you when you read "'Cause the sign on your heart said it's still reserved for me, honestly who are we to fight the alchemy?".
— Hey, this is about me! — you proclaimed smiling and Taylor just laughed. Then, she planted a little kiss on your lips.
— Do you wanna hear how it sounds?
— Why are you asking? — you left Taylor's lap and put Meredith down. You sat beside her on the floor to hear her sing.
Taylor sang what she had wrote. Of course the final product would be slightly different but that was the sketch. You were quite emotional hearing your girlfriend sing about you with so much passion.
— How does it sound to you? — Taylor asked a little frightened.
You answered by grabbing Taylor's face to kiss her for a hot while. And then you just hugged her.
— I love you. — you murmured.
— I love you too, my love.
THANK YOU FOR READING ♡
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morrigan-sims · 2 months ago
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Fixed this one too, after 1.5-2 hours of early morning work. (Can't sleep? Fight blender for 2 hours!! It won't help you sleep, but it does pass the time!)
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Assuming I test this in-game tomorrow/today and it works, then Carrion will finally have an outfit to wear!!!
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Opening my game to look for an outfit for Carrion turned into me opening blender and making a mesh edit... The things we do for our OCs.
#morrigan.txt#self-reblog#I was appalled to find out that the original mesh for this piece of cc has a HIGHER POLY mesh for the other LODS...#FOR A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT OUTFIT.#this outfit's LOD0 is ~7.5k poly but the mesh that was left as the LODs 1-3 was 17k poly.#my upper LODs may be full of holes (need to experiment with recalculating normals tomorrow) but at least they serve their purpose!!!!#I'm bad at blender and cc making and half the time I forget LODs even exist but I don't think even I would do that lmao.#I mean this is a hella old piece of cc but STILL.#I'm gonna test my version in game tomorrow (aka later today) and also hopefully redo my edit of the arm spikes for Carrion's monster form.#I fucked up and forgot to assign the upper arm pieces to the upper arm joints instead of the forearm ones.#and bc I'm stupid I didn't save a version without the meshes joined. So I guess I'm just redoing it from scratch.#which is fine. It literally took me 10 minutes tops to do it the first time and that was with more trial and error than this will require.#anyways. Sorry I'm being so rambly in the tags and have spammed my blog so much today.#I've been absolutely manic with productivity which NEVER happens to me.#although the downside is that I get no sleep.#it's okay. This happens every few months. I call them my ''insomnia weeks''. I get more work done in 3-6 days than I do in 3 months#but I also get an absolute MAX of 4-5 hours of sleep a night for 3-6 nights.#it's an interesting tradeoff....#luckily for me I am used to being exhausted and functioning on little sleep.#alright bedtime for me. hopefully I can actually sleep for a bit before I have to get up in 4.5 hours.
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adnauseum11 · 10 months ago
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Target Lock (John Price x Reader)
Insomnia is a real bitch, except when it is mildly productive.
1.2k words
Kissing only - reader discretion advised regardless
Swearing
Feedback welcome
I have lost control of my life in a very real way and this is helping somehow, I don't know how but it is. Let's not examine that too closely, shall we?
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About a month ago you started hallucinating, and you haven’t stopped yet. Your oldest friend, John, turned up to take you on a date you hadn’t realized you had agreed to. When he kissed you after returning you home that night it was like time slowed and a fever dream had taken up residence in your brain. Something in your body chemistry had shifted and it hadn’t returned to normal yet. You were starting to worry it never would.
You can’t help but notice little things about him now that you had previously been immune to. The largeness of his well-muscled body and how close he stands to you. The way his sleeves pull taut over his forearms when talking animatedly. The way his spicy cologne seems to pair with his cigars like a fine wine. Even the way his jeans stretch over his wide thighs when he sprawls on your couch, waiting for you to get ready. You’re pretty sure you are losing your mind, because this is John. John. The same man that used your purse as a sick bag in the back of a taxi one memorable night out.
You are so used to his big presence taking up space in your life that thinking of him in this new light seems vaguely wrong. You can’t seem to stop yourself though, and say ‘yes’, each time he asks you out afterwards. You’ve gone from overly comfortable with him to flighty and nervous when he’s around. You’re not convinced you like the change. 
He's on his way tonight to help put up plastic over the drafty windows at your new rental. It’s so dangerously domestic. You spend so long debating about whether or not you should blow out your collection of tealights (too inadvertently romantic?) that you run out of time and end up having to leave them flickering on the mantel. You answer the door with an overly cheerful hello, and John leans down to press a gentle kiss into your flushed cheek. 
“You alright, love?” He asks, his familiar and steady demeanour bracing your nerves already. Your affectionate smile is genuine, watching as he locks the door behind him and humming an affirmation for him. He follows you to the kitchen where you’ve laid out your tools – such as they are. Hairdryer? check. Double sided tape? Check. Plastic film? Check. 
John’s shrugging out of his lambskin jacket, hanging it off the back of a chair in a habitual motion as you get the kettle going. You can feel the weight of his gaze and inexorably find yourself turning to meet it. He looks uncharacteristically unsure of himself in the middle of your small kitchen.  
“What’s wrong?” The words have escaped before you can think. He shakes his head slowly, his eyes staying on your face, locked on like a predator. There’s something in his expression you aren’t familiar with, can’t quite read. His hands find his pockets, elbows pressed in against his sides, making himself seem smaller. You frown at his unusual behaviour, a different kind of anxiety overtaking you now. 
“You’re freaking me out.” You warn, your voice warbling as your sentence ends. 
“Did I fuck this up?” He blurts out, blue eyes widening as if he’s surprised himself with his outburst as well as you. 
“Fuck what up?” You ask for unnecessary clarification.
He gestures between you with his thumb, the rest of his body tense and waiting to hear your verdict.
“
No.”
“Are you sure? Cause it seems –“ He cuts himself off.
“Seems like what?” 
“Seems like you’re running scared. Not like yourself, love.”
“John.” You exhale in a breath. You’re startled by his incisive comment, cut to the quick with no retort at the ready.
“Don’t say my name like that if you’re just going to call this off.” His voice lowers an octave and your stomach swoops in response.
“
I’m not calling anything off, I just
” You shouldn’t be surprised John couldn’t watch you struggle without comment. Or pressing the issue. A man of action, through and through. 
“You what? Talk to me.” His voice is soft, concerned.
“What if we do fuck this up? Is it worth it? To throw away over two decades of friendship?”
Something passes over his face and he’s closing the distance between you before you can process that he’s moving. His tone is urgent, like he needs to you understand this, and understand it now.
“You can’t fuck this up. There’s nothing you could do that would make me stop caring about you. You don’t know that by now?”
His big hands come up to cradle your face, thumbs swiping over the apples of your cheeks lightly. The nearness of his big body makes your own respond in ways that you haven’t allowed yourself to process.
“John.” You say his name helplessly, unsure what to do with this information he’s placing in your hands. He’s unbalanced the dynamic between you. Your instinct is to duck and hide, to deflect to something more appropriate for old friends, a joke or insult, but that won’t help you now. You know your eyes must be wide with the fear clawing its way through your chest. He’s moving to step back, to let go of your face before you can muster anything else to say.  
“It’s alright, if you don’t – “ 
You know he’s about to backpedal and your heart feels like someone has taken a hold of it and is squeezing for all their worth. 
“No.” You manage you squeak out, your voice not altogether steady. 
You cut him off with such eloquence that it stops him in his tracks. You’re reaching for his hands, nuzzling back into the space between them before you can think it through. Instead, letting the soft, small animal of your body timidly search out what it wants. 
“No?” He breathes, stroking his thumbs over your cheeks again, like he’s scared to jostle you for fear of something shattering.
“Whatever you were about to say
 don’t.”
His familiar chuckle is comforting, and then the slightest pressure from his fingertips is angling your face up to his. You oblige his unspoken request, his nearness making your skin prickle and your thoughts scatter.  
“Alright, love.” He breathes again and your eyes meet his. This time you can read the want on his face, plain as day. It makes your stomach quiver in anticipation. John’s intense blue eyes are searching your face for something. Whatever it is he must find it, because he’s lowering his mouth to yours in the next heartbeat. 
The silken heat of his lips pull at your own until you open for him, pliant now where before you had been stiff and recalcitrant. The tip of his tongue finding yours sends sparks scattering behind your closed eyelids, sensation overtaking self-consciousness. Your hands take on a mind of their own, sliding up his solid chest to press in to the short strands of his hair and clutch at the back of his shirt, a subconscious effort to ground yourself. 
One big hand cups the back of your head, subtly steering your movements as he plunders your mouth. The other settles on your hip, strong fingers pressing into your soft flesh. A soft whine escapes before you can corral your reaction and you can feel the response thrum through John’s body. You don’t realize you’re moving until you feel your back press up against the cool door of your fridge. The scattered magnets dig into your back as you slowly give in to his onslaught, willingly pinned in place by his big body. The windows can wait a while longer, you absently decide.
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guardian5tiger3 · 7 months ago
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An honest love reading (general)
Pick a picture -
1 2
3 4
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Group one
A cycle has just been completed in terms of love and romance and either you or someone else did not this to happen. They're almost like, dramatic about that.someone involved , you or someone connected to yourself somehow, is overly focused on love and it stresses them out and it feels extreme though I can't pick up on any situation extreme enough to justify this. Someone could have insomnia and or hair loss you could also possibly see someone's tiredness in their eyes. Someone's money might be affected. I keep picking up on a a group of, as in multiple, people. Either someone here is polyamorous and if that's the case it has something to do with denial about something or the want to be in control of something or someone, or for others there's a group of people you're dealing with and they're "heated " about something . I also heard " eyeing you" who the hell uses phrases like this if you know that's a confirmation for ya. You have a group of people somewhat obsessed they seem like obsessed people in general they may be obsessed with something to do with you or just you, I'm also picking up on one individual who has something to do with you that (is very weird, and the groups I'm picking up on more or less give me weird vibes,) well connected to this person I'm getting something about childhood and I'm seeing candy this is really weird and I just involuntarily made an angry or confused look with my eyebrows you know I pushed them down I don't know why. This person may have known you for a long time or thinks they do or something idk this is super strange g make sure you're not overly trusting of every single person ever in your life you know. Someone also could be trying to take something that isn't theirs. Lock your doors , literally. Wow.sorry y'all . Genuinely. I also am somehow picking up on someone's long straight hair and something about glitter. I also saw a purple dress.
Group Two
You guys are easily manipulated and people who are going to want to manipulate you can notice this probably way more than you can about yourself also someone needs to not bite their fork when they take a bite of food it's bad for your teeth I don't know how or why that would come up for me to say sorry. Somebody needs to literally or metaphorically open a window. Um you're on the path to love and it will happen exactly when it's supposed to how it's supposed to with who it's supposed to and honestly unless you really go out of your way you may not have any romance at all until then even if that isn't what you want like for some reason I guess it depends but either your soul wants people in the meantime or you want someone sooner or what I don't know it just don't work like that though you know. I'm generally getting like if you're the type to hope your person isn't with anyone else before they meet you then this is probably for you also. Or your person is like this and I guess they are somewhat powerful cause therefore that's the way it's gonna be and in the meantime I guess you're gonna have to be solo. Somehow this seems better and more productive for your personal development than learning by Interacting with other people and being with "karmics" and stuff.
Group Three
I'm seeing two energies that are basically, literally, nothing alike. Yet somehow they're paired up. You're with this person right now in the past or future or you wanted or want to be with them lol. Some of you it's your soulmate ,though and that's really special and actually really cool and refreshing. Like 99% of you are supposed to at least at one point be with someone like this to you. Or for like very few of you this is just about your signs like fire and water but I really doubt that's as far as it goes you are probably very different either way. You guys are very deep and cool refreshing people very beautiful , good listeners and balanced. Someone has ADHD or something else so you might doubt the good listener thing I'm getting but I think you pay attention to detail or something like somehow this is still infact accurate and you may be don't see it about yourself . I think you all are very deep mentally and have a deep capacity to hold a lot lot lot of information, knowledge, wisdom, n stuff. A lot of people might be drawn to you or notice you and also possibly a lot of different types of people as something about you a lot of different people can still connect with somehow. Yeah also someone's a hater here though and they might tease you with something somehow so I really hope you stay aware of that possibility, realize this about whoever they are and stand up for yourself basically I feel like you have the potential to retaliate and as long as it is nothing illegal I kind of feel like saying I want you to . ????????? I don't know o feel like it would be really satisfying maybe to your guides or it is when you do, fight back or argue cause you're good at it and it would not be easy to win against you or come up with any comeback especially if you plan something. Wow. Hahaha. I'm leaving it here.
I heard desperado and I know three songs called that well two are just remixes of the og you could look up the og or the Mike bars desperado lol . Or just the word maybe is significant, goes with your picture anyway. I feel like most of you that will hear the song will just like the song lol . I can dig it
Group Four
There was a conditional love given and when this was taken away it had someone really stressed out and hurt. Someone was being a complete dick that was giving love conditionally and then stopped . I feel like the shit they do or say is old as f... Like it's ugly and getting old man anyway. This very well could be past energy like long long ago for some of you. This person might have lied. They might be selfish. They may be downplaying your come up or they will when you do come up. Or some , even saying you don't deserve it but I'm being shown you very clearly do. Like this person only gets dustier through time nobody is ever gonna pick up this old kick knack and undust them theyre old and lame. I'm picking up on like, when people say the type of person that peaked in high school. Yeah so this person has their qualities but eventually everyone's like ok whatever yawn. They're definitely super greedy as I just got a card saying " GREED " lol. In terms of future love y'all will be good I'm picking up generally most of you just need to become more comfortable within yourself first and I'm picking up on like cozy night chilling and watching movies and stuff by yourself or with a pet even a friend but you get me just learning to be content also and have good times like that without the need for someone else romantically. Either way somehow some time after you get into that energy a person will come along softly and surely and it will be really nice and happy . Around that time maybe shortly after you will have something happen positive when it comes to work or their work . I also channeled the movie my big fat Greek wedding as I was channeling this last part haha so I thought I should mention that, I know I'm partially Greek and always loved that movie. Someone might like telling stories ? But yeah in the movie she has a glow up and then she sees this guy she thought was cute again and things just worked out and he asked her out and they fell in love it was just simple smooth and sweet and the timing matched up with what I said may happen for you so that's really cute y'all stay hopeful and focus on relaxation. And for some of you if you know this is true though also studying .
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shortscircuits · 3 months ago
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update they didnt fire me and my boss took me aside to explain that he would rather me take random unpaid days off whenever im sick instead of letting me work 30 hours a week instead of 40 hours (something i asked for before i got covid) because if i work fewer hours than my coworkers will want to do it too.
i have covid so im taking an unpaid week off of work. place yer bets
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sunflowersandsapphires · 9 months ago
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A Hint of Lovely Oblivion
pairing: Frank Castle x fem!reader 
summary: After a week of sleeping terribly, Frank makes an effort to help you get the rest you deserve.
warnings: Swearing, fluff, caring Frank, this is not medical advice
a/n: I wrote this for my lovely bestie @madschiavelique who wanted some Frankie comfort. As someone who deals with insomnia pretty regularly, this was very cathartic! I hope you all enjoy. A huge thank you to my other bestie @gracethyomen for beta-ing and helping me plan this fic!
w/c: 4.6k
Inhaling deeply, the frigid air of the room made your nose twitch. Sliding as deep as you could into the blanket pile while maintaining your seated position, you bit your lip, shifting the pad of paper on your lap and craning your neck once again. While your duvet provided an excellent shield to lock in heat, your shoulders inevitably poked out whenever you weren’t fully horizontal, leaving your body to sit in a temperature regulation purgatory; your consciousness rumbled uneasily as the hair on the back of your neck refused to flatten, your brain torn between making you shiver or letting you sweat. The position was far from comfortable—but being awake all night made comfort an unattainable goal for you anyways.
It had been days since you’d slept through the night. You were no stranger to insomnia, you’d been cursed with it your entire life, but lately it had dug its malicious claws into your chest with the violence of a starving feral animal. Your bed, which used to be a haven of rest and relaxation, was now a space that you avoided at all costs—the wonderfully soft pillows and warm blankets mocking you as they sat untouched well into the night, fatigue never overtaking you when you needed it to. For the first few nights of your ongoing battle with sleeplessness, you’d crawl under the covers anyway, praying to any deity listening that the weight and heat of the fabric would force your eyelids to close—but it never did.
Sighing as your pencil tip snapped, you closed your eyes, letting your breath rest in your lungs for a moment before exhaling again; apparently your frustration with your own hormone production created a physical pressure on the lead of your pencil. Picking up a fresh one from your nightstand, you did your best to clean up the smear of graphite from the impact of the broken point.
Turning your attention back to the subject of your sketch, you chewed your lip to stifle a smile. Despite the thick curtains your partner had insisted on, a sliver of moonlight illuminated the massive man slumbering beside you, quietly snoring away—completely oblivious to the inspiration he'd given you. The feather-light moon beams shone through his tousled hair, creeping down over his face, which was adorably mashed against his singular pillow. Considering that he'd turned up a handful of hours ago drenched in other people's blood, it was downright ironic to be calling him “adorable” as he slept—but you couldn't shake the giddy feeling that always bubbled up when you saw his face so lax with sleep. His expression was so uncharacteristically peaceful, it never failed to make you happy.
Sure, not sleeping sucked. You'd be plagued with jaw-cracking yawns and mild memory loss in the morning, just like yesterday and the day before that. Having the opportunity to watch Frank sleep soundly, didn't make up for the fact that you'd accidentally put orange juice in your coffee yesterday, but it made the build up of irritation much easier to bear. Which is why you'd decided to memorialize it in your sketchbook.
Studying the map of shadows on Frank's handsome face, you scratched the pencil over the thick paper, the rasping sound soothing the constant buzzing in your brain. Scrunching your nose as you tried to smooth out the sketch in front of you, you nearly jumped out of your skin when he spoke.
“Why're you up, darlin'?” His voice was rough with exhaustion. Noticing your wide eyes and ragged inhale, a large hand slid up to rest on your thigh. “Sorry, didn't mean to scare ya.”
”It's alright, Frankie. I wasn't paying attention.“ You tried to laugh, but the sound died in your throat.
His hand stroked over your leg as he waited for you to answer his question. Instead, your eyes remained trained on the book across your lap, pencil moving fluidly through the silence. Tracing a thumb over your warm skin, Frank frowned. “Ya didn't answer my question, sweetheart.”
“Hmm?” Your tone was innocent, but the way your eyes remained glued to your work was enough to tell him you had definitely heard the question.
Squeezing your thigh with a yawn, Frank tried not to groan as he dragged himself up to sit next to you. His movement finally captured your attention, your brow furrowing as you set your pencil aside. “What are you doing?”
Giving what he hoped was a nonchalant shrug, Frank slid an arm around your shoulders and pressed a kiss to your temple. ”Sittin' with my girl. That a crime now?“
Smiling despite the guilt flaring in your chest, you shoved at his solid torso feebly. ”Go back to sleep, Frankie. I'm sorry I woke you. I can—“ Shuffling in your seat, you tilted towards the edge of the mattress, fully intending to relocate to a different room so that Frank could go back to bed. Foiling your plan, Frank's arms held fast against your teetering, pulling you flush against his chest.
”Don't you dare.“ He growled, chin resting atop your crown.
”Frank! I didn't even finish my thought,“ You wriggled against his hold, your brain torn between reacting with endearment or annoyance over being imprisoned by his strength. “Let me go, you...you...butthead.” Whining at your own lackluster insult, you buried your face in Frank's neck as he chuckled.
“Fuck, sweetheart. Ain't gotta go for my throat like that.” Frank murmured smugly. You could envision his shit-eating smirk despite it being out of your line of sight.
”Shut up,“ You muttered, a tiny smile gracing your lips against your will. Your body trembled as Frank shook with rumbling laughter. Drawing you into his arms, Frank set your legs over his lap, positioning you towards the windows. The gusting heat from the vent closest to your bed ruffled the fabric covering the panes, the pale glowing rays of moonlight fluttering over your knees as the drapes shifted. It created a mesmerizing dance of light and dark, captivating you.
”Ya gonna tell me how long you've been sittin' here starin' at me or did ya wanna keep pretendin' you were asleep?” In defense of your ruthlessly persistent boyfriend, it has been said that the third time’s the charm. His tone was as delicate as his gruff voice allowed, the muscles of his jaw and throat rippling against your scalp as he spoke.
Eyes falling closed, you focused on the warmth of Frank’s body surrounding you as you willed the tears pricking your eyes to back down. Another unfortunate side effect of sleep deprivation—your emotions started to go haywire over the littlest things.
It wasn’t that you thought Frank would be angry. Well, it wasn’t the biggest anxiety on your mind, at least. It was more the fear of burdening him with your own issues at all hours when you knew a good night’s sleep was practically a miracle for him. The first night at home after a few weeks away always seemed to make it come easier, but other than that Frank rarely rested. The mere thought of forcing him to sit up with you, especially on the one night this week he’d get a full 8 hours, grabbed your guilty conscience by the throat.
Giving a halfhearted shrug, you caved. “Dunno. Slept for a few hours when we went to bed. Then I got up and...” Trailing off, you gestured to the bed in front of you, which was clearly not being used for sleep.
Frank withdrew from the embrace and your pounding heart sank. You set your jaw, waiting for the frustrated scolding
but it never came. Instead, one calloused finger landed underneath your chin, tilting it upwards as he spoke. “You been awake that long?” His eyes shone with concern, boring ferociously into yours.
Nodding miserably, you swallowed the overwhelming shame crawling up your esophagus before speaking. “I’m sorry, Frank. I tried to sleep, but I just couldn’t—“
Cutting you off with a tender kiss, Frank’s hand moved to cup your cheek. “Nothin’ to be sorry about, honey. Ya shoulda woken me up.”
Looking up at him with glossy eyes, you bit your lip, ”You deserve to sleep uninterrupted. I didn't want to be the one to take that away from you.“
Frank chewed the inside of his cheek as he was overrun with waves of adoration and sympathy for you. How he'd managed to end up with such a considerate partner, he'd never know. Especially when he didn't consistently return the gesture.
He'd come home yesterday and practically collapsed into your arms—ignoring how unsteady your balance seemed when you dragged him into the apartment, blaming it on his own weight. You'd patched him up sweetly, as you always did, and Frank hadn't thought twice about the fact that you'd had to leave the room three times to get the gauze, assuming your memory had just been shaken by his battered appearance.
Was he truly so wrapped up in his own bullshit that he hadn't noticed the sunken crescents underneath your eyes? They were so prominent now, stark sepia bruises on your otherwise even skin. It must have been days since you slept properly. Beside himself with worry, his thumb traced the indent under your left eye. ”Shit sweetheart...“
”I'm—“ You started to apologize, but it stuck in your throat when Frank shook his head.
”Hey, none of that. Don't wanna hear it, ok?” You nodded in response to his gentle command, sitting there quietly as he schemed. “Are you tired at all?”
The pitiful shake of your head seemed to make up his mind.
Unwinding from you, he raised his arms above his head in a stretch, moaning as his back popped with the movement. Your face scrunched in disapproval, making him grimace sheepishly. “Sorry, honey. Guess I was stiff from drivin' all day.” Without waiting for your response, he slid out of bed. Your brow furrowed as he strode over to the dresser, pulling a shirt over his rumpled hair.
“Get dressed, darlin'. I have an idea.” He called to you over his shoulder as he rummaged for a clean pair of pants. Sighing, you abandoned the bubble of heat surrounding you in bed and headed for the closet.
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Despite your grumbles and evident confusion, the two of you were dressed and on the road before the sun even peeked over the horizon. With one hand settled in yours, Frank kept his gaze trained on the road ahead, trying not to laugh at your exasperated questioning and adorable pout. Dragging you out of the house at this hour might not have been his brightest idea—since he normally tried to remain on your good side—but hey, he’d gotten this far without you chewing his head off.
Frank could hardly be considered a morning person, but you were practically nocturnal. Leaving the house before dawn was probably high up on your list of personal hells, but staying in bed when you couldn’t sleep wasn’t a good idea. Somewhere in the back of his mind he heard Curtis’s agitated tone.
“For the last time, Frank: staying in bed will make it worse.”
Way back in the day, during his first trip home after going overseas, he’d bugged Curtis relentlessly about his own sleep issues. Maria was tired enough raising a wandering toddler and an imaginative kindergartener, she didn’t need to worry about a restless marine to boot. He’d tried every suggestion under the sun, but sleep still evaded him. Tour after tour, night after night, he’d lay beside his wife in their bed and stare at the ceiling until his alarm went off. After his family died, well
it didn’t exactly get easier to rest.
Despite scouring the internet, a few libraries, and the expanse of Curt’s brain for any possible cures, his sleeplessness persisted. It was a torture he endured for years, and an anguish he wouldn’t wish on anyone but his worst enemies.
Finding out that you also dealt with insomnia was a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, not having to explain his fickle moods and constant absence from the bedroom was a welcomed relief. On the other, seeing the symptoms of sleep deprivation in someone he cared about was an agony worse than an infected bullet wound.
He knew what you were going through all too well, which meant he was determined to try and help. Getting you out of the house was just the first step of his admittedly too-detailed plan.
His lips twitched with a smile as he spotted the building. Turning into the ragged asphalt lot behind the restaurant, he turned his attention to you.
“We’re here, darlin’.”
Raising an eyebrow at him, you remained unimpressed. “A diner?”
Letting out a bark of laughter at your obvious disdain for the activity, Frank pointed a finger at you in warning. “Hey, don’t knock it til ya try it, sweetheart.” His exaggerated stern expression broke through your apprehension, your lips turning upwards into a fond smile.
“There’s my pretty girl.” Frank pressed a kiss to your temple, heart swelling as you leaned into him. “If ya wanna go home, just say the word.”
Biting your lip, you glanced out the window at the electric blue awning extending from the glass doors. The yellow lamp lights lining the sidewalk reflected in your wide eyes as you stared. “No, we can go. I, just
can I ask you a question first?”
“Course, honey. Anythin’.”
“Why here?” Your question was soft, but genuine; your curiosity was outweighing the contempt you’d previously shown for his choice of destination.
Running a hand through his hair, he gave a one-armed shrug. “Fuck, well... ya know I’m no stranger to the whole
not sleepin’ thing. And, uh, back in the early days, when it was real bad for me, I’d come here. We– er– Maria and I, we took the kids here a couple of times. Dunno, wanted to remember the good times, I guess, and it became a sort of tradition. Thought it might help you too.”
With a stuttering inhale, you reached for his hand, stroking a finger over his knuckles as you looked up at him shyly. “Thank you for sharing it with me. I didn’t mean to be rude about it, I’m sorry.”
Squeezing your fingers, he could feel heat creeping up his face. “It’s nothin’ sweetheart. Ain’t gotta worry about that.”
Glancing back out the window for a moment, Frank could see the gears turning in your head as you turned back to him with a tiny grin.
“Lead the way?” You asked tentatively.
“For you, sweet girl? Always.” He pressed a kiss to your hand, his stubble scratching at the skin of your fingers.
Frank ushered the two of you inside and into a booth in the back of the diner. The restaurant was lacking in customers, as could be expected given the early hour. While the inky black sky was broken up with dim streetlights outside of the building, the inside was flooded with fluorescent lights--so bright that you had to shield your eyes with a limp hand for a few minutes.
Once your vision adjusted, you had to admit that the energy in the diner was quite nice. The chipped linoleum tiles that lined the floor were a gorgeous cobalt blue. Along the ceiling, large chunks of the roof had been replaced with thick panes of glass, allowing you to watch the clouds float by, the darkness of the night contrasting beautifully with the intense lighting. You and Frank were seated on a worn vinyl booth, the strips of fabric alternating between silver and black. Similar booths wrapped around the space, almost twinkling as you looked at them.
“So,” Frank pushed a mug towards you. “Whaddya think?”
“It's nice.” You murmured, pulling the warm cup closer to yourself. Somehow you'd missed him ordering himself coffee and you a tea in your distracted state.
Frank cocked his head at you, lips turned up in a smug smirk. ”’S that so?“
Smiling into your mug as you took a sip, you retorted. ”Shut up.“
The drink was warm and, thankfully, unsweetened. It's crisp flavor relaxed your shoulders as you sipped, settling your anxious stomach.
“Hope mint is a’right.” Frank spoke quietly, a blush creeping up his face as he studied his own drink.
“You remembered.” You breathed out, taking his hand in yours and squeezing it tightly as your eyes prickled with emotion.
“Course I did.” Frank huffed, draining the rest of his black coffee. You shuddered in distaste and he chuckled, rubbing a thumb over the back of your hand. “You hungry at all?”
Shrugging noncommittally, you worried your bottom lip between your teeth. Frank sighed, but didn't push further on the subject, which you were very grateful for. You'd never explicitly spoken to him about the effect your insomnia had on your eating habits, but--being the observant partner he was--he'd clearly picked up on it anyways. Once your day started with little to no sleep, it was like all of your bodily functions forgot how to...function. Hunger and thirst cues were practically impossible to read, your body and brain battling each other ferociously at every turn. Which, of course, just exhausted you further.
Scrubbing at one eye with the heel of your free hand, you grit your teeth to keep from groaning. Dwelling on how miserable you were going to feel today wouldn't solve anything, it would just worsen your mood.
”Head botherin' ya?“ Frank asked, brow folding in concern as he watched you knead at your forehead.
”No more than usual.“ You cracked a small smile, hoping that didn't sound as sad as you thought it did. “Just...frustrated with myself.”
“I feel ya, sweetheart. Not sleepin' ain't any fun. But I have some ideas, so don't you worry your pretty little head about it, ok?” Frank tangled his fingers with yours, his gaze earnest.
“You get ideas?” You scoffed, grinning when Frank rolled his eyes in return.
“Ya know what? Just for that, I ain't gonna tell ya about 'em.”
“Nooo,” You whined, taking Frank's massive hand in both of yours and pouting at him. ”I was just kidding. Please tell me.“
”Hmm, I dunno. First you insulted the diner, then my intelligence. Seems like you don't want my help, sweetheart.“  Frank withdrew from your grasp, pretending to sulk into his coffee.
Giggling at Frank’s pout, you reassured him. ”No, I do! I do!“
With a sad little shrug, Frank glanced forlornly out the window.
“Please Frankie,” Pleading with your gaze, you tried to keep a straight face.  “You're my only hope.”
Dropping his startlingly believable moping act, Frank cackled. “Ya think you're real clever, don't ya?”
Smirking into your tea, you gulped down the last remnants with a shrug. ”Maybe.“
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After your countless apologies for insulting his intellect, Frank finally explained why he'd encouraged–forced–you to leave the house before sunrise. Apparently he'd heard that staying in bed while awake could perpetuate the cycle of sleep deprivation. And, though you were loath to admit it, it seemed to help.
The little excursion definitely lifted your spirits, if nothing else. You were able to admire the sunrise and mess around with Frank without your anxiety skyrocketing because of the city crowds.  It was nice, and you told him such–even at the risk of over-inflating his ego.
His next activity, however, was not as pleasant.
“Are you going to have me carry you around the apartment next?” You groused, hefting the bedframe up so that you could adjust your rapidly loosening grip on the cold metal. This much physical labor on an empty stomach and no sleep was not what you’d had in mind for a relaxing day with Frank. He, however, was insistent on moving the furniture in your room immediately upon your return home. 
“You offerin'?” Frank smirked at you, pretending to set the bed frame down. His eyes glinted with a humor you didn’t share over the current situation. 
“Fuck no.” You muttered, glaring at him until he lifted the majority of the weight once more. Frank laughed deeply. 
“Set it right over here, darlin’. We gotta move your dresser and then we’re all done.”
“You know, if you hated the layout of my room so much, you could’ve told me months ago.” Instead of waiting until I was already reaching my limit. You thought to yourself, not vocalizing that particular vulnerability. 
“And have you put me out on my ass for bein’ so forward? I’d never, sweetheart.” Frank chuckled, adjusting your bed as you collapsed against the mattress with a huff. “I’m teasin’, honey. It’s an old trick Curt told me about. All the rearrangin’ is supposed to help your brain remember how to sleep, or some shit.”
Rubbing at your forehead as the ache that had been plaguing you all day made a sudden resurgence, your limbs instinctively curled into fetal position as a small whimper escaped your lips. 
“It’s helping it remember to bother me is what it’s doing.” You grumbled, gritting your teeth as the pain ebbed and flowed. You knew the more you thought about it, the more it would torture you–but the stabbing sensation was all that your fatigued brain could focus on right now. 
Frank snorted, sitting beside you gingerly and caressing your hunched back with an open palm. “‘M sorry, sweet girl. Let me get ya some meds and you can lie here while I finish movin’ shit around.”
Your body felt like it was aimlessly floating, untethered to the Earth and hurrying to escape the pain so viciously attacking it at the moment. You were so tired. Every blink was a reminder of the heaven that had been ripped from your delicate grasp hours ago because your body couldn’t even function in the way it was designed to. Brow scrunching, you burrowed under the covers with a sigh.
“Ya better not be sleepin’ on me, honey.” Frank murmured as he stepped back into the room. 
“Course not,” You mumbled. “Would never
”
“I know you’re tired, darlin’, but ya gotta stay awake until it’s dark. Naps will just make ya feel worse, trust me.” He trailed a finger down your arm, taking your hand and placing some painkillers into it. Waiting patiently until you begrudgingly dragged yourself into a seated position, Frank smiled softly at you as you popped the pills into your mouth. Holding the glass of water out to you, the Marine squeezed your leg as you drank, tucking his chin over your head as you collapsed wearily into his side.
“The big bad Punisher takes naps? Hard to picture, Frankie.” You teased, your voice morphing into a satisfied hum as he threaded his fingers into your hair. 
Frank scoffed, kissing your crown before returning the jest. “Maybe I should take the vest off before closin’ my eyes next time.” 
You giggled, burying your face into his neck. His warm flesh felt wonderful on your pounding head, soothing the pain behind your eyes with each measured breath. “Do you cuddle your guns like teddy bears?” The question was overtly ridiculous, but Frank loved you enough to entertain it anyway. 
“Course. What else would I do with ‘em?” He asked coyly. 
Looking up at him, the corners of your lips lifted as he pressed a line of gentle kisses down your nose until he reached your lips. 
“If I turn on the TV, are ya gonna pass out on top of me?” He murmured, his stubble scratching your face as he spoke. 
“Wouldn't dream of it, love.” You smiled, pressing a kiss to his sturdy jawline before he stood up to grab the remote. 
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If someone would’ve told you a year ago that your next boyfriend could make a bad insomnia week feel tolerable, you never would’ve believed them. But here you were—lying on your stomach completely topless as Frank massaged a lightly scented lotion into your back—feeling pretty comfortable with the whole arrangement. 
After you’d failed to stay awake during the movie you’d picked out, Frank had carted you around town on various errands: picking up groceries, going to the bookstore, and even taking a quick walk around the park to feed the ducks, which he knew you loved. Your body still ached, and your mood still waned, but overall, it was a good day. And all the credit belonged to your incredible partner. 
Groaning appreciatively, it felt like you were melting into the mattress as Frank tenderly stretched your taught muscles, unraveling the knots of stress that had been building up all week. 
Chuckling, Frank pressed a tiny kiss to your bare shoulder. “Glad it feels good, sweetheart.” 
“No, it’s awful,” You lied. “You clearly need more practice..” 
Frank snorted, “Noted. How’re ya feelin’?” 
“Tired.” You sighed, rolling over as Frank handed you one of his tees to sleep in. 
“I bet. We’re on the last leg, sweetheart, almost there.” Frank’s large hands eagerly wrapped around you as you nestled into his side. Cupping your face with one palm, the fingers of his other hand threaded into your hair, detangling it carefully and brushing it off of your face. 
Biting your lip in frustration, and to keep from sighing again, you nodded. Attempting an understanding smile, you poked him in the chest. “I know. Thanks for putting up with my cranky self today.”
“Sweetheart, you can be snappy with me as much as ya want if it means you’ll sleep through the night.” Frank smirked, squishing your cheek as your eyes suddenly blurred with tears. 
“I love you.” You whispered, going limp in his hold as he settled against the pillows. 
“I love you too, darlin’. So much.” Resting your foreheads together, he kissed you delicately and your lashes fluttered. 
“Frankie?” You looked up at him with your practiced ‘doe eyes’ expression that he could never resist.
“Yah?” He raised an eyebrow skeptically.
“Can you read to me?” Batting your lashes, you watched with satisfaction as Frank’s expression softened, your eyes taking in the exact moment he caved to your whims. 
Straightening his posture stoically, he reached over to grab your new book from the nightstand with an exasperated huff. “Oh, I see. This was all a scheme of yours to get me to read to ya? ‘S that it?”
“No
” You giggled, nuzzling into him as he cracked the novel open.
“Sure, sure. You’ll be hearin’ from my lawyer, sweetheart. Think ya owe me compensation.” He winked at you, eyes lingering on your face.
“Honey, before ya drift off, jus’...” Sighing, he stroked a thumb over your cheek. “Just know, if all this doesn’t work, cause it ain’t a cure all, ya know–”
Laying your hand over his, you gave him an encouraging look. He inhaled sharply, thinking about how he wanted to phrase the sentiment. 
“I want you to sleep, darlin’, ya know I do. But if it doesn’t happen tonight, we can always try again, ok?”
Startled by the affection in his tone and his beautiful promise, your face went slack as you nodded. Eyes flitting over your gaze, he nodded curtly once he decided you understood. Returning his attention to the book in his hands, he cleared his throat before beginning to read. His rumbling velvet tone soothed you, your eyes falling closed almost immediately. Here, in the safety of Frank’s arms, surrounded by his beautiful voice and reassured by his adorable promise, you finally felt at peace. Though you knew sleep might continue to evade you, the anxiety you’d felt about your insomnia didn’t feel quite as all-consuming tonight. Whatever happened, Frank would be there. And, for now, that was enough.
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Thanks for reading!!
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