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#individual panels + no text coming soon!!!
snekverse · 9 days
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Could we get a redraw of the scene where Aphmau finds out Garroth is Zane's older brother? That scene is pretty mid in canon it'd be cool to see it taken more seriously
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stimuwrite · 3 months
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StimuWrite 2.3 is here, please update your version!
I worked hard on this version to add a bunch of new features and improvements, the most exciting of which is the Addon System and Manage Themes & Addons panel! Previously, the only addons available where to add new language fonts, but that will change soon. I've already completed a couple addons that will be launching on itchio very shortly that you will be able to use to extended StimuWrite even further. The app should also be FASTER and more performant! If it's noticeable for you please let me know, I would love that.
The updates
New:
New Manage Themes & Addons panel allows users to delete individual themes and addons, this can be found in the Options menu. No more deleting everything to remove or reinstall one theme!
New compact mode that can be activated once the side panel is closed with the notch button next to the word count goal input
7 new heart colors added in Emoji Options, they go great with the free pride themes!
Addon system and menu bar. Addons coming! Once installed, you will be able to find them in a collapsed menu on the bottom left corner of the app (or the right if you have switched the emoji placement)
Improved:
Your work is automatically exported upon closing the program, if you've selected an export folder
Improvements to the custom emoji interface to make it more clear wtf is going on
Delete all settings and files button actually deletes everything and puts the themes and addons in system trash instead of permanently deleting them
Rich text export now exports HTML files instead of markdown files (just rename your txt files to get markdown files instead)
Lots of performance optimizations to make it FASTER! SNAPPIER! (please please please let me know if it's running better for you lol)
Bug fixes:
Multiple bugs fixed with unexpected custom/theme emoji behavior
Bug fixed where text was sometimes cut off when changing font or increasing it's size
Bug fixed where double dashes weren't being converted to em dash if typing middle of text
Bug fixed where words weren't being counted when typing in the middle of a document
Bug fixed where stimuwrite would accept gamepad inputs
How to enter "Compact Mode"
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ICYMI: Free pride theme pack!
In case you missed it, last month I released a free theme pack with 8 colorful themes to celebrate pride! If you've ever wanted StimuWrite themes but haven't had the $$ to get some, this is a great opportunity. You can find it here: https://thatclowngoddess.itch.io/pride-theme-pack-for-stimuwrite
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qiaipia · 1 year
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All Of The Girls You Loved Before — miguel o’hara
ミ★ Miguel tries to take a break but the world doesn’t let him!  
ミCONTENT: miguel o’hara x GN! Reader. miguel’s past messy relationships. a really awkward elevator ride. let me know if i missed anything! based on that one scene in Grey’s Anatomy. No use of y/n.   [1.3k wc]
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Miguel O’Hara previously worked at the office of Spider Society full-time.
25/8.
Until of course, LYLA berated him for being too obsessed with the multiverse and never having a life outside of it, so he goes home on slow days.
Villains apparently had personal life matters to take into consideration when plotting nefarious doom, such as shopping at the local hardware for atom bomb parts, gynecologist meetings, or even just plain plotting evil. Whatever it is— they usually weren’t about to destroy the world on a Tuesday or Wednesday.
So come Thursday morning, he was refreshed from sleeping on a proper bed, with a proper breakfast and had a proper bath. He had coffee in one hand, and instead of diving into work as usual from his portable screens, he approached the main elevators to take in the glass paneling installed, giving a view of Nueva York’s lush greenery.
It was quiet. But he expected Spider-people and top scientists to start pouring in soon: for now, Miguel O’Hara steps into the elevator alone.
He even humors himself and doesn’t click the close button on the shaft immediately, taking Lyla’s advice— taking it easy.
That was until the fwip! of a distinct Spider-individual, yelling ‘HOLD IT OPEN PLEASE!’ came trodding in.
The webbing came first, and then a ‘you’ that propelled themselves forward into the shaft. He awkwardly shifts around as you catch your breath, squatting low.
Office hours started a little bit later, but you wanted to get an early start on all the paperwork you left behind.
You look up from your heaving position and make eye contact with the red eyes your boss-slash-fling-slash-the guy you didn’t text back because you weren’t quite sure you were over your ex (a Peter Parker) quite yet, but you wish you really didn’t ghost him because Miguel was such a nice person who you wanted but you just weren’t sure how committed you could be right now.
His gaze struck you, and you immediately stand up straight at the back of the elevator shaft as the door closes, avoiding his gaze.
Miguel was a bit surprised to see you at Spider-Society after a few weeks of no talk  between you two. Not even a meme from you. He thought you had returned to your own universe.
A few beats pass and the door closes. He lets a few more beats pass before turning to you slightly.
“Your watch?”
You nearly jump at his gruff voice cutting through the soft hum of the elevator. “Huh?”
“Your watch— where is it?”
You looked at your expiring day pass, that you probably had to get a new one soon, lest you start glitching. “Oh, it’s in repair. Margo said it’ll be done in a week.” You mumble. You weren’t sure where you now stand with Miguel O’Hara.
The man stands up straighter. So you went to another person first to fix the watch he built and designed? He felt something thorny and green spike in his chest.
“Give me the watch. I’ll fix it within the day.” He says, facing forward, trying to hide his softening frame. He didn’t give you room to argue.
He didn’t play favorites, but he wanted you both to start talking again. More importantly: You’ve been staying in Nueva York and you’ve never come to visit him once?
But before he can try more small talk to clear the awkward air, the elevator stops at one of the human scientists’ floor levels.
In comes Xina Kwan. Head data engineer-slash- freelance programmer and computer scientist- slash- Miguel’s childhood best friend AND ex he cheated on, but was now working in the facility after Miguel called in a favor to crunch some numbers regarding multiverse probabilities.
Xina’s eyebrows raise at the sight of her ex, her black hair shaking as she tilts her head avoiding his gaze as well. Did things end well between them? Debatable.
It was too early for this shit.
She ducks her head as she reaches for her own floor. If Miguel could look closely at her shoulder, a version of LYLA in a Marilyn Monroe get up, hovered around her, giving Miguel the stink eye Xina couldn’t.
Miguel had to give it to the AI, he probably deserves the dirty look.
The ride is quiet and was now much more awkward for Miguel.
He tries to glance at Xina for a brief second, just to see how she was doing—but perhaps they were more alike than they thought, growing up together and whatnot. Xina too was attempting to steal a glance at him.
Their eyes meet awkwardly and they both look away, necks nearly snapping at the whiplash.
This of course was news to you, behind them, your brows furrowed in confusion at the pair.
The air was tense. You were eyeing Xina’s frameup and down, and LYLA Monroe was making detailed calculations and searches on you.
Miguel wished the elevators ran faster.
A few floors further up, the elevator dings open once more, and fate must be fucking with him because Dana D’Angelo waits outside.
She holds a stack of file folders with neatly coordinated labels, all well dressed, not a hair out of place so early in the morning.
She was likely on the way to the resident’s spider-therapists office, whom Miguel assigned to after the need for a competent clerk was needed in their department.
Of course, what he failed to detail was that Dana D’Angelo was his brother’s ex-girlfriend and his ex-fiancé- slash- the person he cheated on Xina with- slash- she cheated on him, with his biological father.
But that messy debacle was ages ago.
Still, he cringed internally, at the thought of her entering the elevator, but they made room for her anyways, her high purple heels clacking against the marble floor.
He had nothing to say about Dana, they closed their chapter amicably, along with a hefty divorce fee, but they were friends enough that Miguel helped her land a job at the society when the Daily Bugle office she front-desked for closed.
Miguel wanted to SCREAM. But he settles on running his fingers through his hair.
Side-eyes between Xina and Dana were given. You sensed how Dana subconsciously stepped and tilted her body towards Miguel. You all probably didn’t know you all worked in the same building as the facility was so big.
But of all days, why today?
The elevator ride up was painstaking. The uncomfortable air made it so that despite Miguel having no spider-senses whatsoever, he felt harsh tingles at the back of his neck.
His own version of LYLA in a fur coat popped on the corner of his eye, visible only to Miguel.
She took a good sweep at the group he was with and arranged her heart-shaped glasses with a low whistle shit-eating grin.
“I betcha’ wished you took the stairs right now.” She remarks teasingly.
He feels a migraine coming, and he wholeheartedly wishes he could shrink down and cease to exist.
“Cállate.” He hisses under his breath, with gritted teeth.
Apparently, even that wasn’t small enough as his voice cuts through the silence of the elevator, and the three turn their heads at him.
Confusion, concern, and chagrin.
Miguel really felt like he should’ve just got off at a random floor and taken the 50 or so flights up, rather than endure this torture, but a few floors before his supposed relief: his stop, the doors open once more, this one taking the cake.
The annoying visitor of the week: his brother, Gabriel O’Hara, stood on the other side of the doors, looking up from his phone as the lift opens.
He takes one good look at the passengers who stare back at him, and then at his brother with his own shit-eating grin and a waggle of his brows.
Fuck it. Miguel promises never to leave his office and never take it easy ever again. 
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I wrote this at 5am. I forgot abt it when I went to sleep, so I was very surprised to find a fic made in my notes. First fic abt the dorito man.  Interactions are appreciated and feed the soul ig.
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lucascecil · 1 year
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Something I Read - The Eighth Doctor Strips
So, while I haven't (yet) heard all of Eight's audios, there are only a handful left. And I have started reading the books (going through Kursaal right now. You can find my commentary of the books on the 'bookshelf' tag). So, while I have a lot to go through, I wanted to start something new, different, exciting.
And so I decided to read the Doctor Who Magazine comics. And what a ride it was.
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To make it easier for me and to write a cohesive text, I'm going to talk about individual stories and then at the end of each volume comment upon the overall arch.
Endgame, by Alan Barnes - ★★★☆☆
It's not a bad start, but not my favorite. The Toymaker is a fun concept but his stories are very inconsistent to my tastes. Here, he is fine. The comic is smart in the sense that the use the format to its fulliest, allowing the Toymaker to be as cartoonish as ever - and it fits.
And even tho there is a comedic tone, he still comes off as a threat. There is a gruesome scene where he crushes a character bones and flesh. You can feel the pain. I usually do not like when a new companion is introduced in a continuity heavy story as I think it takes atention away from them.
Izzy is great. She is a geek, she is witty, she wants adventure. She is flawed, I couldn't help but wince at how selfish she sounds when she talks of her parents - which she has been fighting with over insecurities about being adopted. She doesn't even call them mom and dad anymore. And that makes her come alive. She is a breathing, living person. And we have a wonderful journey ahead in a yellow brick road.
The Keep, by Alan Barnes - ★★★★☆
The comics got me here. Endgame is nice and all, but it's The Keep who starts playing with bold new ideas for the stories. I got a glimpse of what I could get out of these and I loved it. I was all in for the ride.
Eight and Izzy arrive at the far, far future, near the time the sun is failing and soon enough it will be no more. It's Earth dying days. It's a wasteland. The whole planet turned into a warzone as the Transmat Wars begun - a concept never fleshed out but engaging nonethless.
What's more interesting, though, is that a local scientist have dedicated his whole life to building a superficial star. It had unexpected consequences, as it turned out that it's actually alive. Eight is nedeed so someone bonds with the star, guide it towards the right path. Crivello, the scientist, tried - but even short exposure to the star was enough to make him age years in a blink. A time traveller - even better, a time lord - is needed.
I find the scene Eight merges with the plasma beautiful. This incarnation more than any other feels to me like a force of nature, a constant to the universe, and so I'm always on board when he is influenced by forces outside his control - and vice-versa. Izzy gets anxious and cries, because the Doctor may have died, and it finally hits her that if he does, there is no way back home - for now the narrative don't dive into this topic, but it's a nice touch still.
And then the story takes your breath away, as when everything seems nice and done, Crivello is brutally murdered by his assistant.
Fire and Brimstone, by Alan Barnes - ★★★★★
I did not want a Dalek story, but I am glad I got one because this one is great. It continues the plot points left open at the end of The Keep, as Izzy and Eight visits the same place decades later. The new artificial sun is now stable, but there is a threat in the horizon.
I love that plasma from the Cauldron can be used to see the future, and I love that Eight still have a link to it because they'll always have a bit of each other. I really like the wasps weapons (biological?) the Daleks use to control the humans. It's horrifying, it's disgusting, it looks great. It's truly unsettling, the panels of characters vomiting hordes of insects after infection.
The Daleks are a real threat this time around and it makes perfect sense that they would try to irredicate genetic variants from other dimensions. It's a pity that we see little of that conflict, because the mutant Daleks looked GREAT.
I was devastated that the Cauldron imploded at the end. It all ends considerably well, but there is a wild sorrow of knowing that a whole new lifeform died. I love a rich diverse universe, and I want it to last. What is even more bitter, though, is Eight's silent rage that he can't right now strike back at the Threshold - you can tell by looking at his face in the last page how furious he is over Ace.
Tooth and Claw, by Alan Barnes - ★★★★★
The superior Doctor Who's Tooth and Claw, mind you. I loved this. It's a horror story at heart. The Eighth Doctor and Izzy are pulled into a murder mystery plot in an isolated, atmospheric isle as one old acquaintance of his, Fey, call for his help. And then the guests start dying, one by one.
It's fun, it's believable and it's the kind of horror story I am always open to. Conflict comes not only from the apparent supernatural menace, but also from humans interactions - Marwood hunting Izzy is terrifying, the human ability to be more frighting and cruel than any fictional villain ever could.
Which is not to say the fictional villain is bad, because it only gets better. From the start we are told of a local ghost; then we have bodies on the house and killer monkeys; and yet we also get bottle diseases and vampires. And it all ties well together. This is an island of terrors, ever entertaining.
It ends on a huge cliffhanger, with Izzy and Fey taking Eight to Gallifrey to help him recover from what may well be a mortal wound.
The Final Chapter, by Alan Barnes - ★★★☆☆
Reading the extras I was surprised by how harsh Barnes was with this story - it's not bad at all. Yes, a lot of its themes and plot points were better fleshed out in Neverland, but it's good for what it is.
I love the scene where Eight meets Rassilon and a whole council in his dreams. Demoiselle Drin says she has taken the seat of Merlin the Wise, and given that the Doctor himself is Merlin I wonder about these implications. I love villain Rassilon - but it's refreshing to a seemingly well meaning version of him, too. I wonder, also, as Eight is in the Matrix, if this is the same Rassilon of Zagreus. It's fun to try and fit all these piece of a jigsaw never meant to be completed.
The clone plot is not that enganging, but as Eight and Fey explores "madworld" to try to understand what the hell is happening, I was wondering if a bit of this went into Seven's part in Zagreus, with little rat Charley. And that's the main problem of this story. Ideas better realised elsewhere. A group of time lords trying to gain control of Gallifrey and rewrite its history? Neverland. A kind-of time cult? Faction Paradox. Weird surrealists scenes in the Matrix and timelords' minds? Zagreus.
The regulars are great, and the story is engaging enough. Also, the cliffhanger of a lifetime.
Wormwood, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
This was fun and a great conclusion overall to the Threshold. It's not what I was expecting and while that sometimes oes play a role in how much I like a story, this one has ideas strong enough so that it didn't really matter.
I wouldn't say this story is mocking the Briggs-Doctor, but it does play with the readers expectations in that way in a time we only had the expanded universe. Of course I already knew Eight wouldn't be regenerating while reading these comics so it didn't hit me in that way, but it was fun nonetheless. What I thought, however, is that this would be a retroregeneration or something alike, so I was very much pleased to known that it was actually Shayde playing as the Doctor.
I'd have preferred if the Threshold were actually a natural ocurrance of the universe and not a fabricated species made mainly of humans buuuut as I said previously this is fine. I also wished to a darker motivation for them other than greed, but that's also fine. What I do like a lot is the terror that went through my body when they killed everything in space - and I wish it was not reversed at the end. Not only it would weight upon the characters, but also would be so interesting to see how the whole universe would handle something like this.
We have a glimpse of that kind of horror, of whole civilazations colapsing, but I wish we got some time to explore this idea fully.
Shayde is ine of my favorites things about the comics. It's an amazing concept brought to life wonderfully and that gets even better when coupled to Fey, who is also amazing. How they handle their new status quo is not explored here but rather in future stories, but I do have to say that I love it.
Happy Deathday, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
It's a fun anniversary story. All these Doctors interacting is great.
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The Fallen, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
I'm not the biggest fan of Grace, mostly because I don't see many ways to use the character interestingly. Well, The Fallen does it wonderfully. There is something wrong in London and Grace is somehow at fault.
I love her relationship with Eight. It's still a bit sexual - they do kiss once more - but honestly it doesn't bother me. I do not share the opinion the Doctor should never engage in romantic or sexual relationships, I just want it to have meaning.
Grace is repenting for her faults. She thought she had a special future ahead of her beacuse of what she was told in the movie, but now she helped creating a huge danger that is getting people killed. She resents the Doctor in some ways, that he wasn't there and feels like he mislead her. She calls him out when he gets angry with her - he out the world in her hands and left her and she didn't known better.
Izzy and Eight at this point are already the dream team. Their domestic scenes are great and this time around Izzy is alone for a bit - the Doctor believes her dead. She is growing up and have already come a long way around, which is one of the main themes of her stay in the TARDIS. She is in a way a mirror to Ace - completely differente character, yes, but I mean in how she fits as a companion.
She is a sapphic character with parents issues, her stories can be read as a coming of age and her relationship with the Doctor is a bit paternal. Just like Ace. The first big arc of stories with Izzy as a companion handles the Threshold, who are responsible for Ace's death, so I don't think I am completely out of my depth when I say that this era of Eight mirrors Seven's life.
Unnatural Born Killers. by Adrian Salmon - ★★★★★
I love Kroton. If you don't love Kroton, there is something wrong with you. Seek help. This is not his introduction, he appeared on the magazine twice before - both good stories, but Ship of Fools is a must read. He is tragic to the core and deals with a concept that I love and wished to see more in Doctor Who: a faulty Cybermen, who kept this emotions.
I am happy to dicovered the expanded universe because now I have three plots like this to feed my fictional needs: Kroton, Marc and Bill. So that's no longer a problem. But I would love to see more of Kroton - it's such a pity that these stories don't leave much room to have him along Eight and Izzy because they are absolutely one of my favorites TARDIS teams ever.
Unnatural Born Killers get Kroton - already well established - and makes him even better by making him an action hero. The art is beautiful and I love every single fight scene of his. Also, he punches some Sontarans in the face. I love the guy.
The Road to Hell, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
Izzy and Eight get to 17th century Japan, where creatures from the myths are terrorizing local population. Sato Kitsura is a samurai who just lost his lord to a demon and now seeks revenge upon these creatures.
I am a sucker for stories of fictional characters or monsters being real, so we already started strong. I also love historicals, so that's two points for The Road to Hell. And while I do prefer them to be pure historicals, I actually love how this story handles its sci-fi elements.
An alien species gave a local lady a machine that allows her to make anything alive out of her thoughts. They only wish to observe what she makes of it as they want to understand the concept of honor. It's a great idea even if not the highlight of the story, as their conflict with the Doctor is not all that much relevant, but I like it still.
What makes wonders out of this concept - besides amazing drawings of creatures and japanese pop culture - is when lady Asami uses the machine to try and see what comes of Japan in the future, when she discovers that Izzy is from the 20st century. What she sees is, of course, Hiroshima and Nagasaki. And then she goes bonkers.
What I think could've been handled better is how much seeing so impacted her psyche because she has little character layers after this points as she is going balistic. Because while she was not a good person up to this point, it's not hard to understand why she would get mad at what she saw. She has every reason to get furious. And I don't think that entitlement to anger is given proper focus. But I like it still.
This story also ends with the Doctor making Sato immortal, which he hates as he was trying to kill himself in ritual now that his revenge was done. He feels the Doctor robbed him of his honor, of his humanity even, but is dismissed. In one perspective, I like a lot what this says of the Doctor - about how him being a time lord make him insensible to others sometimes and how badly he can mishandle a situation. Because he thinks he knows better. And so he dismisses what other people have to say.
But I was also rewatching seasons eight and nine of the new series while reading these comics, so I was surprised about how similar Ashildr's character is to Sato. They are handled completely different in some aspects, and while I actually like Alshidr a lot, I would say Sato makes the most of it. I don't known if Moffat had ever read these comics, but oh my gosh it's almost the same plot.
TV Action, by Alan Barnes - ★★★☆☆
Beep the Meeo is back. Haven't read The Star Beast yet so I wasn't pumped, but he is fine. The best part is Beep being defeated by Tom Baker talking too much, however.
The Company of Thieves, by Scott Gray - ★★★★☆
Or that story where the Kroton plot comes into the ongoing Izzy storyline and we get the best TARDIS team ever.
I got worried for a second beacuse of Eight's initial reaction to Kroton - he tries to kill him and it appears to be sucessful - that I was going to be denied grandeur, but it all works out well. The crew characters are not that interesting and they look a bit too 90's comics for my tastes.
The Glorious Dead, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
One of my favorites Doctor Who stories ever. It does everything it wants to do magnificently.
The setting is gorgeous. I love how this diplomatic meeting goes wrong in the worst way possible and we are left in this deadland. I love also how it ties to the religious themes and what makes humanity - in a loose sense of a human. The Doctor is out of the story when things gets bads; Izzy and Kroton are left to handle things themselves.
And how far has Izzy come. In one if its parts, this story makes the best of the doctorless time to show us how Izzy is now capable of doing a lot - I got my eyes wet reading her letter to Max; her relationship with Kroton is beautiful and I love how they relate by feeling like outsiders and less than human sometimes. I love that Izzy has a plan and that it works. The whole universe was doomed, but then Izzy Sinclair gave them a chance. And then she is dead.
Or so Russell T Davies thought, alongside us readers. Kroton rage after her death is heartbreaking. And then we see that Sato is somehow tied to this situation. Time made him insensible in his immortal life and now the only thing he believes in is death. Being denied death made it the thing he wants the most and the Doctor, even if unintetional, made a monster out of him. Of course Sato has personal responsabilities and this theme is dealt within the story itself, but it was his immortality that made it possible this horror movie ti happened.
And while I am in this topic, I love the body horror of this story. The way these people burn themselves to death for their beliefs is disturbing. The "monsters" desings are dope. There are a lot of alien species here, and they all look cool. Ooooh, and towards the end when it's revealed that this is what came of Earth...
And so I need ti talk about the other half of this story: the Doctor meets the Master once again. And of course he has been manipulating recents events. And it's interestingly in many layers.
First, the Master seems to have changed into someone different. Or so he says. And I do believed he did, I just don't think it was for the better. What he has now is a belief and that makes him more dangerous than ever. He may not have become a better or worthier person, but he does terrible things while trying to prove so. He wants to show how monstruous the Doctor's actions are but don't take any responsability to himself as he believe it was done for a cause. And it all comes into his need to prove himself better than the Doctor.
Secondly, it's a meta commentary on their relationship and how they destroy everything around them. And I mean that in a textual sense - they are the main characters of the story, but what about the lives of the people they leave in pieces? The Glorious Dead turns this around by making the Master - and even the Doctor, a little bit - think he has a destiny, that this story is about him and his friend. But it's not. It's about the little people. It's about Izzy and Kroton and Sato and how they try and get up again. Trying to reclaim themselves of a world that is usually center around other people stories.
Kroton and Sato are mirrors of each other in that sense; in how they are dealing with death and immortality. With loss. Of other people, of their souls. It hurts, but it's beautiful.
The Glorious Dead is one of favorites Doctor Who stories. You should read it.
The Autonomy Bug, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
This is going to sound pedantic but I am not a comedy guy. It's not that I hate it, just that I prefer drama overall. It's why it's rare to see me having much to say about a comedy story. This was great. It's a basic concept - robots appears to have gone crazy - but handled beautifully to tell a story about what makes us, us. The characters are weirdly complex for the little time they have to show it off. The funeral scene is as sad as they come.
The ending made me emotional. It's completely different from the stories Scott Gray told in his Eighth ternure overall, and it's great by being so. It may not be my favorite of the bunch, but it stands ou as unique.
Izzy's Story, by Alan Barnes - ★★★☆☆
Second time listening to this story. The first one I hadn't read any Izzy stories yet so I wanted to see if my opinion changed. It didn't. It's not bad, I have fun with it and all, but it takes what I like the least from Barnes' stories to make an audio. It's one of Eight's most cuttest and comedy based like Deathday and TV Action and so it feels inconsequential to me.
I don't know if I agree this should be placed here. Izzy sounds a bit too immature and so I think it would work best earlier in her timeline. The plot itself of Izzy going after a comic book that desappeared is nice, but I don't care much for the conclusion.
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Ophidius, by Scott Gray - ★★★★☆
This is interesting in many ways. It introduces Destrii, so that's already a must read. It also starts the body swap plot, which I love. Izzy has never been so betrayed and it's really interesting to read, as next stories will explore. And I love the setting. Ophidius is a living ship who has its own ecosystem. The people who control the ship are horrendous and the idea that so many people have been turned into beats is horrifying.
The visuals are beautiful. I love the design of the mobox when they are in fours, but I thought they didn't look that good on two legs. There are many other cool aliens designs in Ophidius, including Destrii. That chair that let Eight become invisible by placiing him just a milisecond in the future is a dope technology that, under the show rules, make sense.
I wondered for a second if Eight wasn't going to notice that Destrii was in Izzy's body but thank gosh he did. I don't like when this happens in this trope because it undermines the characters relationships and at this point Eight should be able to recognize if there is something wrong with Izzy - and he did.
Beautiful Freak, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
A wonderful character piece. Izzy is depressed. She is in a body that isn't hers; her own destroyed in Ophidius. She feels ugly, disgusted and angry and don't know what to make from here on. Her life has changed forever. While I think Izzy's thoughts about Destrii's body are a bit cruel, it's understable. She was betrayed, she had her own body and now she won't ever be able to go home. She has every right to be outraged.
The pages where Izzy is submerged in pool as she can't breath is painful and so, so beautiful. Her dialogue with Eight gets to my heart. A sample of the best Doctor Who have to offer.
The Way of All Flesh, by Scott Gray - ★★★★☆
An interesting story. I don't think we reach the full potential of the concepts introduced here, but it's fun and emotional and have nice things ti say. We get a glimpse at Frida Kahlo's life in the Día de los Muertos as there is something terribly wrong happening.
This is a horror story. It uses body horror concepts to the fullest. It's as disgusting as Doctor Who gets. The Way of All Flesh introduces the necrotists, alien artists that make art of the dead, out of pain. A bit influenced by Hellraiser, I would say. I like that Gray chose the day of the dead as a setting for this story because it me disguted that the girl would dare to make something horrible out of such a beautiful date.
Frida also fits well into the story. She can relate to what Izzy is going through and I like that she calls her our on her bullshit. The ending is so beautiful, with Frida painting Izzy as she "was". Because it's the same person beneath. There is still the same beauty in her, no matter the state of her flesh.
Character Assassin, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
Oh this is great. Scott Gray was already my favorite Doctor Who writer by this point but he got extra points by writing a hate piece for Moriarty, one of the most infuriating characters to ever be. Oh it was so fucking great to see him humiliated.
Children of the Revolution, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
I thinks about Children of the Revolution a lot, even more than a month after have read it. It's my favorite Dalek story and I doubt that'll ever changed. I love the setting, I love what is done with established history and I love the art and the colors.
Izzy and the Doctor visits a friend of his who can help her acclimate to her new body, Alison. She is a marine biologist who is working in an underwater station. One day, however, they are attacked by (underwater) Daleks. What will happen next will shock you.
Nobody is exterminated. The Daleks choose to get the humans into the city they built underwater. Nobody can know they live there. Because they are peaceful. They are the Daleks with the human factor the Second Doctor helped engineer in Evil of the Daleks. In that sense this is a heavy continuity story and I could have hated it, but I don't. Because it makes something incredible out of the continuity it's using.
This Dalek city is engaging. You doubt every second when something will go wrong, because you know it will. But this time it's not these Daleks fault. It's the humans. I do think it's a complex situation because knowing every single thing the Daleks ever did I would never, ever trust any of them either and so the human characters are not hard to sympathise. But it's so heartbreaking to see something to beautiful crumble into pieces. There was potential here, for a better future, and it's shattered because of hate and mistrust.
It's interesting to have the TARDIS team as outcasts not because they put themselves in an awkward situation - they were friends with the crew - but rather because they are fundamentally different. Neither the Doctor or Izzy are humans at this point. The Doctor have story with the Daleks, and these ones trust him. They are outsiders and for once the Doctor have his hands tieds. He don't know if he can trust the Daleks, but if he don't and he is wrong - this is a chance of a lifetime. But he has no pull over the humans anymore. There is no winning.
And of course, there is Kata-Phobus. This huge, gorgeous, lovecraftian monster who has lived in this planet for ages and influenced this Dalek colony since its inception. It also influenced the conflict with the humans as it wants to feed upon them all. Kata-Phobus in a sense is there to externalize all that is wrong with the Dalek-human conflict, that ideia of racial superiority, that ideia that there are outsiders. That some people are essentialy different than others. Phobus is that fear made flesh. He plants fear and distrust in the head of these into his reach and he feeds on it.
So yes, I was moved when, in the climax, Alpha commands his fellow Daleks to autodestruction so that Kata-Phobus is defeated and they die as they wished to live - a peaceful people who didn't want any more death or cruelty in their lives. And so the Doctor and Izzy are left speechless because for once there were goods Daleks - while they saw the worst humanity had to offer. It's a must read. I love it. Just, trust me.
Me and My Shadow, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
Children of the Revolution ends in a cliffhanger with Izzy being abducted by these weird aliens - and now the Doctor is out for blood. But that's not the focus of Me and My Shadow - this is a Doctor lite story as we are reunited with Fey and Shayde during World War II and see how they are doing - not that great, as they have difficulties sharing a body and for the modt part have agreed to be active at different times.
Fey is frustrated that she can't use her abilities to the fullest because Shayde knows what that can do with the timeline. They are now one living being, but they are not in sincrony, and that is holding them back. And we also get hem being badasses and killing some nazis. So ten out of ten.
Uroboros, by Scott Gray - ★★★★☆
The Doctor recruits Feyde to help him rescue Izzy. Somebody pointed out how this is a bit similar, but in a much smaller scale, to what he does in A Good Man Goes to War, and that's fair. He is also reunited with Destrii who, as we discover, did not actually die neither had Izzy's body been destroyed.
I know it's Destrii kissing him but that panel of Eight being kissed by Izzy's body it cursed. Burn it with fire.
I don't care much for the Mobox plot to be honest. And that's way it loses a star. It's a fair enough sequel to Ophidius and there sre some cool concepts, but the plot falls into who tropes that I don't like that much neither feel like this story had enough pages to try and do something new with then.
Still solid.
Oblivion - ★★★★★
So finally we go after Izzy, who has been taken to Destrii's homeworld. Which is very ugly. I know it's intentional because it's a wasteland, but nonetheless what a ugly, disguting place.
The local riches have turned into humanoid animals some decades before and are now there to entertain local "monsters" - who are actually people of this dimension who have been badly fucked up by actions of the royals themselves and...
This place is a mess and everybody is horrible and no wonder that Destrii became such a horrendous person. She is the most sympathetic of the bunch, actually. Her mother is indeed a monster and was horrible to her. And is horrible to Izzy, when she arrives there mistaken as Destrii. And, of course, she made her daughter fight in arenas to the death.
Destrii once had a pet, that she took care of for months, until the day her mother made her kill it. And Destrii's death since then have been pure death. I wonder why the hell the girl run away.
Oh and her uncle is not much better. He talks like a nicer man but he is as bad. He helps Destrii escape, but it's more so he could test a way to run away himself - he had no way of knowing she would survive doing so. He is only gentler as long as he get something out of it.
So yeah, Destrii is fucked up. The parallels between Izzy and Destrii are great and I love how it's written. I love that Destrii had the option to make hell on earth, but she steps away. I love that she tells Izzy how unfair she has been treating her parents. I love that she kills her mother, even.
And then Izzy. As I said before, this is a coming of age story for her. And now is fully intk adulthood, and is ready to leave home. The TARDIS. So she kisses Fey because you only live once and she is tired of being a closeted lesbian, asks the Doctor to take her to her parents and say it's time she fix things. Izzy has had many adventures and she has grown up so much, and now is time to move on.
And oh, how I will miss her.
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Where Nobody Knows Your Name, by Scott Gray - ★★★☆☆
It's fine. The Doctor is dealing with missing easy while drinking in a bar. It has some fun alien concepts and the Doctor bits are fine. And unkown to him the barman is Frobisher, who doesn't know he is talking to the Doctor because he haven't met Eight yet.
The bits of Eight thinking about retiring do plant some nice ideas tho.
The Nightmare Game - ★☆☆☆☆
I tried. I promised I tried. But I have been reading hundreds of pages of wonderful imsginative stories and then I get to this and... it's inferior. It's leagues below the stories being told before.
The Doctor almost asks the worst kid to ever exist in London if he wants to travel with he him. I get that he is lonely but can we not.
Also it's that guy writing. Yeah. That guy.
The Power of Thoueris!, by Scott Gray - ★★★☆☆
Something I haven't yet is how more violent Eight is in these comics (and the books) when compared to the audios. You might think that's why three stars, but I like it. I think it's fine for some lives of the Doctor be more violent and even cruel than others.
And oh my gosh. He is savage here. That poor hippopotamo girl was irrititating, yes, but oh dear she was eating alive by crocodiles.
Overall a fun story with an art that I like but that is not that consequential.
The Curious Tale of Spring-Heeled Jack, by Scott Gray - ★★★★☆
And then we are back to form. The Doctor is still directionless and in search of his next companion to be, because he collects them as Bruce Wayne collects orphans, this time in victorian London as the city is being "haunted" by a badass looking prankster "ghost".
It has a kinda obvious twist but who cares, it's well written. And one of the best non-introductory companion stories I have seen so far as it actually does something interesting with the non-companion.
Once again the Doctor overstepped but this time he isn't called out neither by characters or by the story. I understand that the girl he met and the monster that revealed herself were two different people and you could make an argument that debating so would make a great plot, but that's not the focus of this story so instead what we see is the Doctor wiping a criminal's woman memory so she lives unaware of her crimes (and honestly without being taken to justice).
I understand why it happens, but I wish the story would delve more into the implications.
Bad Blood, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
I like this story a lot. The Doctor arrives in the USA in 1875 in the middle of a conflict by an indigenous tribe and white people. The leader of the the tribe believes that the Doctor was sent to help them survive. The scenes where the both of them go into the "spiritual world" are beautiful.
And then there is Destrii and her uncle trying to get something out of this situation. There are "werewolfs" attacking nearby villages, which has been rising the racial tension. Jodafra and Destrii offer weapons, much more advanced than they should ever get, to the white soldiers. And, of course, there is also second intentions behind their actions.
I *must* say: Destrii is far from being a perfect person but these traits are written intentionally. She is kind of an asshole in this story because she thinks of this situation as being part of a western movie, one of the few references she has of Earth. She doesn't understand that is helping genocide, the impact of her actions. But she is not a monsters, so when her uncle put children into risk she draws a line in the sand and betrays him.
I like to think she had flashbacks to her own childhood. She is distress by children in danger while she usually have no problem with people dying. And the way Jodastra hits and almost kill her is disgusting and horrifying. Destrii is not a good person, but she is trying to be. And that's a little bit heartbreaking.
Sins of the Father, by Scott Gray - ★★★☆☆
The Doctor takes Destrii to a space station where she can be healed but the station is attacked by vengeanful monkeys who live in zero grav and centuries before were slaves of the same alien race that now owns the medical station. They are not slavers or even violent anymore but that's the only revenge the monkeys are going to get so they will destroy it anyway.
Destrii is a decent person and kinda saves the day and the Doctor offers her stay at the TARDIS. Not the strongest the DWM have to offer but not the best either.
The Flood, by Scott Gray - ★★★★★
Ok so let's start by talking about the elephant in the room. Destrii character makes sense but I still wish she was written a lil bit different here. She is not human and the only thing she knows of humanity are movies and cartoons that are filled with racial stereotypes so she reproduces them when meeting humans and it makes sense but oh my god it's so umconfortable. And I know it's intentional but still.
That out of the way, this is good. Destrii entusiasm of properly visiting Earth is contagious. Too bad they arrive just before a Cybermen invasion. And what a invasion. They have been manipulation local population through water that mess with their emotions. The guy Destrii is racist to tries to kill her because of it as his emotions are totally out of control and it seems as if he is having a breakdown.
Cybermen from the future have arrived in London and are about to try and convert everybody. For starts I love their design, they are my favorite Cybermen just for how gorgeous they look. We meet the M16 characters again and it's disturbing when their emotions are manipulated to they actually have a breakdown. It's cruel and effective when we see these characters that we have met before are hurting themselves, asking for mercy and, later, even converted.
We see them partially converted and it's disturbing.
At its heart this is the best the cybermen have to offer: a story about how our feelings is what make us humans, no matter how heartbreaking it can be, or how painful it might get.
It's also about change, as Eight's time was near its end and the Ninth Doctor was ready to make his debut.
At the climax of the story the Eighth Doctor falls into the time vortex and almost merges with it and the description of him almost becoming one with time itself is beautiful. He chooses to step away from eternity, though, for Destrii. She needs him.
It was the right choice from DWM to not have Eight regenerate here, because they got the perfect ending. Eight and Destrii walking towards the sun, ready to have many other adventures. Because their story together just begun.
This was a wonderful read and there is barely a story I could call bad. Most of them are great or classics, to be honest, and this is perhaps the best Doctor Who has ever been.
So farewell, "but change is what makes us real".
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peterlbrown4d · 7 months
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starlostseungmin · 2 years
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i’m crazy just like you.
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pairing — best friend!i.n x gn!reader
genre — fluff, friends to lovers trope (some scenes were inspired by the kdrama, our beloved summer)
warnings — coffee consumptions, not proof read
words — 1.3k
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“quick! act normal,” he said.
“normal? pfft, why would iー” jeongin pushed you aside as the wall welcomed your body, just like how minho treated him like a cat when he plastered himself on a white-painted panel. seungmin came in your direction as your best friend gave him an awkward look, greeting him a good morning.
“y/n, save me…” he mouthed at you as seungmin wrapped his arm around jeongin’s neck, dragging him away. shaking your head, you knew he was in trouble. he tried to free himself from seungmin’s grip but the latter didn’t bother to let go.
“bye innie!” you waved as seungmin nodded at you with a smirk.
you and jeongin have known each other since high school, you’ve been together for so many years that no one could make you pull apart. for being labeled as best friends mean that you have the same interests, he likes coffee, you like coffee, he loves food, you love food, he loves taking pictures, you love taking pictures and he loves you, you love him. never a dull moment when you are together. you share everything, even your most embarrassing secret. maybe that’s part of the reasons why you became the best of friends. but there’s one thing he never told you,
he sees you more than a friend.
he couldn’t blame you, nor himself for falling in love. seungmin is the only one who knew about this and his hyung kept his mouth shut for some reason because he doesn’t want to be involved in a drama. jeongin hates keeping a secret from you but being careful as he is, he’s afraid to ruin your most treasured friendship. and out of all friends he has, you are the only one who knows him better than anyone else.
but why did he choose you out of everyone?
he didn’t fall in love with you the first time around, it was when he asked you to go with him to see the cherry blossom trees just near your university since he didn’t have classes that day but you have. you told him to wait for a bit but minutes turned into hours and night finally came. jeongin sulked outside a convenience store where he drink a can of sparkling water to calm him down where you ran as soon as you could to apologize.
“you’re late,” he said.
“i’m sorry,” you sighed in between. “got stuck with our professor’s errands.”
“it’s fine,” he answered. “i guess we just have to go next time.”
“you didn’t go to the park?” you asked, taking the empty seat beside him.
“it’ll be boring without you. i didn’t want to be alone so i ditched it.” he sighed again as you gave him a nod.
“i know you would say that,” you responded standing up as you shove your hands inside your trouser’s pockets and threw the cherry blossom petals above him. his eyes wandered in awe and amusement. the thing is, you knew you were coming home late, and seeing the cherry blossom falls while on the way made you think about how to cheer him up. he didn’t know why his heart flutter that moment, or maybe he was just too touched seeing your sweet gesture. his eyes fell onto you as you watch the petals fall, you were wearing your genuine smile that made him think you were beautiful.
he kept those fresh petals in between the pages of the book seungmin gave him during christmas which he never read. his hyung assumed it became his favorite text since he always carry it inside his bag. but when he asked him about it, disappointment on seungmin’s face surfaced but he’s happy about jeongin, admitting that he has feelings for you.
but clearly, the cherry blossoms were the first. there was also this one time when jeongin locked himself inside his room to concentrate on an individual project he procrastinated on. you brought him iced americano which luckily, you knew the password of their dorm. you just found him lying on the floor with his laptop running on the coffee table. he wasn’t feeling well that day so you decided to help him finish it and cooked for him, fed him his favorite food, and cuddled him to sleep. he thought it is normal, but his heart was beating faster when he felt your body only inches away from his, and seeing you fall asleep with him on the couch, he admired how peaceful and comfortable with him.
the third one happened when you were riding the bus together for a trip, it was packed with passengers and he had to stand in front of you to prevent any interactions. you were leaning against a pole and jeongin held on to it. unfortunately of him, he’s been accidentally pushed towards you making your faces have gotten close to each other. his lips almost brushed onto yours and the gap is just 2 inches away. his eyes widened as so as yours, even his cheeks and ears turned red from the embarrassment but you just laughed it off saying he’s cute.
but he couldn’t hide his feelings anymore.
it was raining that afternoon and you had to go straight to be bus stop to ride a bus home. you thought jeongin didn’t come to class so you had to take care of yourself alone when the truth is, he’s been shy and nervous about seeing you today. seungmin slapped him hard with words and encourage him to go and confess instead of hiding, so when he got out of the classroom, he realized it was raining. he didn’t have an umbrella to run but seeing you walking out of the campus made him rush through the pouring rain.
“y/n!” he called as you turned towards your best friend with his hair and hoodie being soaked from the rain.
“innie?” you said and was about to share the umbrella with him when he reached out his hands to stop you from coming closer.
“stop right there.” he said as your brows knitted together.
“what? you’re wet, you’re going to get sick.” you said being worried.
“i’m fine,” he responded. “just hear me out first.”
“okay?” you said tightening your grip on your umbrella.
“i know we’ve been friends for a while, and you know i’m so open about anything when it comes to you,” he stated. “but i’m sick of hiding my feelings that i like you more than what we have right now. i know i’m crazy confessing to you out of nowhere, in this stupid rain, in public, but i like you. so much that my heart beats faster every time you’re so close to me or even if you’re not doing anything! i don’t want to lose our friendship but here i am,”
you just stared at him as he waits for an answer, he thought it was stupid, he thought it was embarrassing and he thought you hate him now because of what he said and you’re so silent about it. but it took you a few moments to respond, it was so sudden of him to do something as cheesy as this yet you love it, especially when it’s raining.
“i know it’s shocking to see me like this but if you hate me nowー”
“no,” you sighed in between. “i’m crazy just like you, jeongin.”
a smile was formed on your face which made him confused at first,
“what?” he asked.
“i like you too, dummy. i thought i was the only one,” you chuckled as he bit his lower lip before rushing towards your direction, cupping your cheeks, and pulling you into a kiss. the umbrella fell from your hands as you hugged him, reciprocating his kiss, not minding anyone who was watching.
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taglist: @wolfchanchan @inseonqt @soobin-chois @1-800-lixie @luvhyun3 — please let me know if you want to be added to my permanent tags (through anon) for future writings ♡
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bugmangaka · 2 years
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Kingdoms of Seasons Book Print in Progress!!
Mae and the Kingdoms of Seasons is getting its first book! It’s going to be a different start than originally planned! Instead of printing the main story or the zine first, I’ve decided to print the Draft Comic!
If you do not know what I’m referring to, you may have seen me post pieces of it here under the tag #panel dump! They were individual panels drawn in pencil, for example, these:
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(Pictured, 5 separate panels from the Draft Comic)
This comic has over 2500 panels and is made up of 9 chapters!! As well as having a few bonus comic strips. I worked on this for around 6 months, adding to it every day and sending the updates to my friends. I put bits of it here, and larger chunks on DeviantArt, but I’ve never fully released it.
What’s interesting is that basically the entirety of Kingdoms of Seasons as it is today is thanks to this comic! When I first started it, the series was planned to have just the main story and a short post-story. Clearly that’s not the case anymore! This comic was what made me decide to expand on the world so much.
Another interesting thing is that when I started making this, it wasn’t planned to be so large at all. I just was drawing for the sake of drawing, and kept going. The first chapter was just to show my friend a scene I had planned. Then the second was to continue it. And the third. By the time I started the fourth chapter, I had started writing scripts. By chapter 5, I had the entire arc planned out. Because of this, chapters 1-4 are admittedly pretty rusty, but it shows how much everything has grown! I stopped this project around the end of chapter 6, but I am finishing it now!
In terms of what the comic is about, it starts one year after the end of the main story of Kingdoms of Seasons. The comic covers Mae and Joel having their kids, Dolly starting her business, and Jeremiah and Noble meeting! This comic is the initial version of this story. In the future when the manga-styled books are in production, this story will come up again fully revised. This book shows where Kingdoms of Seasons first started and how it has grown over the past three years!
As for the print!
I have scanned each page the Draft Comic was drawn on, and am digitally extracting each panel and am formatting them as comic pages! They have been cleaned up, and all text is redone digitally. Pages are colored in monotone pallets that change depending on the tone and lighting of the scene. Earlier scenes will include author comments on revisions. Here is my current design for what a page would look like!
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(Pictured: The first page of Chapter 1)
The printed book is estimated to have at least 350 pages! It will be printed as a hardcover with custom endpapers, and have an ISBN number (meaning it will be officially published!)
In order to realize this project, I will be hosting a kickstarter once the comic is complete.
I will post progress updates as I continue working on this! I will post the first interest check sometime soon :)
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buzzykrueger · 4 years
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The moment when Gon’s priorities start to change - ch. 64 and 65
While working in my meta of the separation scene (which will take some time still, sorry), I came across these chapters again: 64 and 65. Two of my favorite. As a linguistic and literature student, I’m always trying to catch hints in Togashi’s writing - we know he carefully thinks about each word used. Have a good read and keep in mind is just a thought -  and the dialogues and panels chosen to be showed in here are meaningful. This is not a deep research with theory references, but just some of the various examples of how artistic and textual strategies work in Hunter x Hunter, that they are not random and how even the slightest changing of words and switching perspectives can impact the story in order to provoke a reaction, meaning something to the audience, leading us to a way. 
Anyways.
The boys had just finished the Heaven’s Arena, with tons of hints of how they would bond more and more, for example, Killua wanting to evolve with Gon in the same pace regarding both the Floors and the Nen training. The scene where Killua and Gon are meditating together, Killua getting more protective of Gon, as they soon become a pair. 
They take a short well deserved break: it’s time to visit Whale Island. After all, Gon came to Kukuroo Mountain, and Killua wants to recollect what is home to Gon, too. Fair enough, it’s how I understand he’s self-inviting. 
When they arrive. we are introduced to the fact that Gon, someone who deeply cares about his family, hasn’t called once since he passed the Exam. Of course, he got extremely focused on rescuing Killua and then training with him in the Arena, getting distracted. Not that he doesn’t care about Mito or anything, but he’s found something that kept his focus real heard. And Mito imagines what it is. 
Their dialogue and her glance right after that hint why she can’t even be angry at Gon - because she’s not looking at him, only. Every time it would make sense to show only Gon but we get to see Killua by his side, too, is a visual message to the readers. Mito could’ve only looked at Gon, ‘cause she just met Killua and he’s not related to her. But she observes the meaning of his presence, even if Gon does not say it.
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The star gazing scene, one of the most important in the story and something we are very familiar with so, sorry to bring it up again - I know you all must be tired of seeing the same panels (but I adore it and I will keep using it). It starts with scenery that are important memories of Gon’s life when he was alone, now bringing a new meaning to them, someone to share with: Killua.
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When Killua approached Gon’s plans from now on, and after getting his answer, he questions what he should do. Gon says that he should come with him. 
And here is another example how a simple choice of words - not only the words itself, but the timing when they’re said and the position, the “breath” between then, or even their absence - can mean so much as fantastic and complex storytelling strategies. Because Gon only gets to know that Killua, actually, doesn’t have any plan AFTER he asks him to join. He’s not asking because Killua don’t have it - he didn’t know that before he asked - but because he wants him to stick together. This is why it’s important that this request was said and showed before Killua elaborates on his feelings, so we can know that it’s not because “since you have nothing to do”. And fun fact: Killua is the only friend that Gon actually insists to not leave. The chapter when Kurapika and Leorio head to their goals, Gon just said “oh, already? - okay, see you/good luck/something like that”, with a honest smile. And I know Gon says “see you around” to Killua at the separation scene, but it’s also the first time he's shown unsatisfied with this decision, not smiling at all, implying he’s not okay.
Continuing, its Gon putting Killua in a place that no other belongs. It’s a re-signification of Killua, Gon’s favorite places, his home and their future - everything starts to change and take form to the audience. 
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To Gon, it’s about sticking together because they like hanging out. This is the main reason for his request, since it’s the first thing he says about it - and further he adds their individual reasons, to be more convincing, but the core is what it is.
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As we know, Mito overheard everything, specially the moment when they start to compliment her and Gon says she is his real mother. Then, later, we have chapter 65, now a re-signification of Gon’s relationship with Ging and Mito.
After accidentally hearing his words, we can interpret that she’s not that insecure anymore about losing Gon to his new found career. It was bittersweet when Gon left, after all “he is indeed his son”. But she realizes he’s different from Ging - he comes back, he values her, he could be in search of something he doesn’t have like news from his biological mom but instead, he chooses to embrace what he does have. Gon can’t even imagine how impactful his reassuring words were, and it’s also a opportunity for Mito to let out the resent on Ging and the Hunters, giving place to finally trust Gon. 
And she tells him what the absence of Ging means to her. How she got hurt, but still wanted to have him around. And that’s when Gon takes Ging out of his place in his heart: it’s time to put him in his true place and make space for those who stay: Mito and Killua. 
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We don’t need to give titles and special places to those who are undeserved of it and should just perform a specific role in our lives as we let them. Mito herself craved for Ging’s attention, always running after him, seeing him only by his back, hiding/missing just for him to come to her aid. Gon realizes that it’s what he’s doing - he does not have someone to call a father, because Ging never make up to this title. He downgrades Ging to the same person Mito knew.
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And now, even if he still feels the urge to prove Ging he’s not weak and undeserved of attention, company and worth, he definitely is not the same person and does not want to be. Ging is not the “dad who I want to follow the same steps” anymore. And then, we go back to Killua:
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 “But Bea, what does this have to do with Killua? We’re only seeing Mito and Gon there!” Actually not! We’re seeing Killua too, but not physically. We get to connect Killua to this scene by a simple line Gon said one chapter before, about Killua’s meaning to his life:
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To Gon, it’s enough just to know this answer. Why? This line is VERY specific, literally the same thing he said to Killua in the previous chapter. He chose to bring it to table. It’s a soft - and literary - way to say his priority changed and to connect Killua to his objective. He reclaims Mito as his real mother, downgrades Ging AND shows what it comes first at his mind now - wanting to know if Ging had the same thing he has with Killua, stating his friend’s importance. “Look, Ging, how far I got. Who I took with me. Did you have this?” 
And this could easily be sided with the end of Greed Island, when Gon says the first thing he’ll do when finding Ging is to introduce Killua. ‘Cause in his main goal now, the first things that come up to his mind aren’t being just like Ging and reunite with him anymore - it’s the “friend around my age”, it’s “Killua” and everything that refers to him. It changed. Gon was behind something he didn’t have, his father presence and some pride, and comes back with something even better he didn’t have either: a true friendship, who wants to be there and assure his worth. 
And for me, that is the reason Togashi ends Mito and Gon’s conversation with a specific panel, not of them, not with a picture of Ging, not with the sky only... but with this:
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Killua. A person not mentioned in their dialogue directly, and someone who’s not family and isn’t in the same room as them. But that is there, respecting his privacy with Mito. This is there for us to catch. It’s not a direct exchange between Gon and Killua, they’ll still do it in their way, because its meant for us: when two characters are not showed together in the same situation/moment, but are referred directly or indirectly, it’s a writing choice that means “it’s for you, the readers, to connect this.”
Togashi could've never put the “did he have friends his age?” line that wouldn’t make a difference - we would go with this Gon “new approach on Ging” because of how Mito feels, and would be satisfying enough. But the author, with this sentence used in the previous chapter and this panel, it’s reclaiming the audience to catch Gon’s new focus and remind us of Killua, that he’s there, relaxed, patient - and does not intend to leave. 
EDIT: I truly think Mito will play a major role in the realization of Gon’s feelings. She’s, since the beginning, an important person and a cog who makes his significations move, first subconsciously, now more actively - but I’ll elaborate more on that in future posts. 
Not deep, not a serious research, but something fun to elaborate that is implied in text, i’m used to catch this stuff and seeing by this perspective by dealing with literature classes on a daily basis. Does not mean I’m an expert or that I’m right, but that is something I’m quite sure its on purpose. Hope you all enjoyed!
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lsvdw-blog · 3 years
Text
Not a Minute More: Part 2
Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x f!MC
Word Count: 1.8k
Warnings; Rating: Mentions of a cyberattack, Angst; Teen+
Premise: MC's perspective on the day that rocks Ethan to his core and threatens to change his life.
Author’s Note: I was going to wait to post this, but I'm loving the flood of content we're getting rn, so I thought I'd hop on too. I cried writing this... I'm so sorry 😭. Part 1 here. I hope you enjoy and thank you for reading 💖
~ Monday, 8:20am ~
"Good morning, Mike!" Serena greets the security guard right inside the door.
"Hey! How are ya? How's that Dr. Ramsey?"
"We're both doing well, thanks! How about you and the family?" She asks as she puts her phone in a cubby and unplugs the Wi-Fi enabler from her laptop.
"It was the wife and I's anniversary this weekend! We went to Martha's vineyard and saw the most beautiful proposal! You and Dr. R gonna get going on that soon? Aly has been talking about going to y'alls wedding since she met ya!" Mike gives a playful wink.
"Oh, congratulations! That's wonderful and send Aly my best wishes. But you'll have to talk to E on that one," she laughs before opening the door to a stairwell that leads to a classified area.
After keying in her pin, the door clicks open. She grabs a static protection lab coat, walks through the entrance, and is met with a plethora of state-of-the-art equipment. Floor-to-ceiling grey switch panels, curved monitors as far as the eye can see, and countless probes, clips, and wires.
She walks over to a few familiar faces. “Good morning! How’s it going?”
“Nice of you to finally join us! Dr. Ramsey keep you this morning?” Isla, one of the engineers, jests.
“I saw your check-in on the monitor — you walked in two minutes before me!”
“Those diagnostic skills at work, I see,” Isla retorts and they both laugh.
Isla had become a fast and faithful friend since Serena joined the project. They bonded quickly over both being minorities in the world of science and supported each other in every work facet. They had lunch together everyday and gradually, their work bond grew into a personal friendship as well. They’ve become so close that Isla now also regularly spends time with the original Edenbrook gang.
“Alright, enough chit chat. Let’s get this show on the road.”
The team nods and responds, “Yes, Doctor.”
~ 12:00pm ~
Serena exits the classified area with some colleagues and they all make their way to retrieve their phones.
"No new patients. Stuck in meetings and doing paperwork. I miss you and wish you were here."
She immediately breaks out into a large grin after reading Ethan's text and hits the dial button.
"Hey, ready for lunch?" Carmen, one of the lead scientists, asks.
Serena nods and moves her phone slightly away from her ear. "Be there in a minute. You guys go ahead."
She waits for a few more rings. He’s probably busy, I’ll call again later. She hangs up and makes her way to the cafeteria.
~ 12:40pm ~
"We did all the necessary prep work this morning to begin testing after lunch. Everything is looking good. We can begin running our tests since everyone is here. Are we all ready to begin?"
"Yes."
The system engineers are sitting at connected computer stations, inputting the required credentials to start. The rest of the team is standing behind them, waiting and nervously watching the screens. After a couple minutes of tense silence with nothing but the clack clack clack of keyboard keys, Vincenzo, one of the lead engineers, speaks up.
"This is weird… we're having some trouble accessing the necessary data. Did someone put up a firewall?"
Everybody looks around at each other, shaking their heads and muttering "no."
"Isla, are you seeing this? Can you get through?"
Isla continues to type, not saying anything. After a few more seconds, she turns to look at Vincenzo with a concerned expression. "I don't recognize some of the items in our system."
Just as she finishes her sentence, everyone's attention is pulled abruptly to a wall monitor on the right as it starts showing nonsensical images and patterns. Two seconds later, an alarm goes off and a red warning light begins flashing within the building. Everyone's eyes go wide as realization dawns on them: they've been compromised and shelter-in-place has been activated.
~ 12:55pm ~
Everyone begins to evacuate the classified lab area, grabbing their phones on the way out, and peering through the one-way windows. They can occasionally hear Mike speaking rapidly into the phone with a 911 dispatcher, when he's not being drowned out by shouts from colleagues.
On the descent to the bunker, the tension is palpable. Individuals clutch onto each other, others try frantically to reach loved ones, and some are in complete disbelief and shock. As they all descend the five flights of the winding staircase to the basement, windows are no longer available, but the ceiling bulbs keep flickering on and off. Each time it happens, everyone stops in their tracks, ducks down on instinct, and picks up the pace when the lights come back on.
~ 1:15pm ~
The entrance to the Harvard labs bunker is protected by a vault door that has a counter system. When the system is in place, the door can be opened once for people to get in. Once it's been closed, it can only be opened when there's one person on either side working together — it's futile with only one person. The only other way it can be opened is by shutting down the counter system from the outside, with the correct override pin, which only a handful of the most trusted team members know.*
As the vault door comes into sight, the wheel on the outside is turned, and the door opens with a whoosh. People slowly start filing in and head towards the back. However, not everyone can stay in the safety of the bunker. In case of an emergency, the project they’re working on must be erased, to protect it from falling into the wrong hands. Certain people have been assigned particular instructions to delete specific portions.
Serena is one of them.
She's walking next to Isla and their arms are looped together. As Isla enters the bunker, Serena lets go of her arm, stopping at the threshold. Isla whips her head around.
"What are you doing?! Get in here!" She reaches for Serena’s arm.
Serena shakes her head. "I'm the only one currently here who knows the medical codes."
Isla's eyes are frantic in realization. "I'll go back with you! I'll be your lookout! You're not going alone!"
"You'll be safe here. This is my responsibility."
Serena reaches behind her neck and unclasps her gold necklace for the first time in 7 years. She grabs Isla's hand and places the jewelry into her palm, closing Isla's fingers around it.
Serena stares at their clasped hands. "In case anything happens," they both flinch at another flickering of lights. "Promise me that you'll get this to E."
Their eyes are locked now, having a silent battle: Isla begging her to stay and Serena finding the strength not to.
"Isla, promise me. Please." Serena squeezes Isla’s hand that much tighter.
Isla realizes that there's no use in fighting Serena. Risking her life to delete the project is part of the job. They all made a commitment and if the roles were reversed, Isla would be the one fighting to go back.
Isla slowly nods. "I promise, Serena. I promise. But do your best to keep yourself safe. Try and stay near the corners, away from any large equipment that could have aftershock effects, and—"
Serena shakes her slightly. "I know, Isla. We did take the same training," she smiles, trying to make a joke to lighten the mood, but Isla just stares gravely at her.
A booming sound rattles the building and Serena knows it's time to go. She gives Isla a quick hug, before pushing her backwards into the bunker. Before Isla has regained her footing, Serena has closed the bunker door with a resounding thud.
~ 1:30pm ~
On the way back to the classified area, Serena takes out her phone. Ethan hasn't returned her earlier call. Her heart is pounding and with trembling hands, she hits the call button on Ethan's contact card for the second time in less than two hours. After a few rings, his voice comes through.
"You've reached Dr. Ethan Ramsey. I apologize for missing your call. Leave a message and I'll get back to you."
Just as she’s about to start speaking, the lights go down for good. "Hey E," she tries her best to keep her voice from shaking. She puts the call on speaker, places the phone out in front of her, and turns the flashlight on. "I don't know when this will hit the news, but we're currently under cyberattack. I don't know from who or what, but they’ve already gotten into our mainframe and power supply. Everyone has sheltered-in-place and is awaiting further instructions." She takes a deep breath as she inches down a corridor.
"Everyone except me, Vincenzo, and Carmen. We’re the only three here right now trained to completely delete the project in the event something like this happened. I'm walking back to the lab as I speak."
Serena rounds a corner and the lab comes into view. Thinking about what she has to say next, silent tears stream down her face.
"Ethan, sweetheart, I need you to know that the last eight months by your side have been the absolute best eight months of my entire life. You are the light of my existence and mean everything to me." She lets out a deep breath. "I wish I could hear your voice right now… I'm really scared. But I made a commitment, so I need to go back in and finish the job. If something happens, know that you are unequivocally the love of my life and the one for me. I know we haven't talked about it yet, but know that I want to spend forever with you as your wife and have you be the father of my children." She sniffs and continues, "you would be a fantastic husband and dad."
She comes to a stop in front of the keypad located right outside the lab and swallows past the lump in her throat. "But if the universe has other plans for me, I'll be waiting for you and I can't wait to spend forever with you in the next life. This isn't how I wanted to tell you, but until next time, whenever that is, I love you so much, Ethan Jonah Ramsey, more than words could ever properly convey."
She ends the phone call with tear-filled eyes, stashes her phone on a nearby workbench, punches in her key, and enters the classified area one more time.
~~~~~~
*Disclaimer: I have no idea if Harvard labs has a bunker and if they do, what kind of door/system they utilize. This is all purely AU!
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plague-of-insomnia · 4 years
Text
Ch 174: Bard Doesn’t Want To Kill Innocents?
The last few pages of the spoilers really caught my eye. Enough so I translated the last page because I had to know what was happening. (I have bad eyesight and can’t read the rest enough to translate more than a couple words unfortunately)
The chapter is mostly a continuation of the tour, and it suggests (as I had suspected) that Ada genuinely wants to help the soldiers. Bard seems to take a liking to her—look at that smile, and how he’s scratching his cheek (a kind of nervous habit he has when he’s being self conscious).
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Also note how both Lau and Ron seem to be watching their interaction with hardened expressions. To me, this supports the idea that Ada will be one of the deaths listed in Ron’s book. And perhaps Ron knows/suspects that Bard and/or Lau are going to be involved in those deaths.
After this, Lau and Bard go outside to talk in private, and Lau seems relieved, stretching, and says something about “finally killing” (the bold text in the top left page/panel)— perhaps Lau is relived they found the blood facility so soon and they can despose of it quickly and go home after only a couple days away.
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Based on their interaction, it is possible that Lau wants Bard to destroy the entire sanatorium (with everyone in it), and not just the blood collection tower, perhaps by blowing it up.
Bard is extremely alarmed at Lau’s suggestion.
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Lau’s reaction is chilling (and Bard certainly seems shocked/scared).
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This is a rough translation of the last page, all spoken by Lau:
やだなあ〜
Hey, it isn’t likely
ここは伯爵に害為す血液採取施設だよ
This is one of the blood collection facilities that the earl (wanted us to destroy) harm
キミはここに何しにきたの
What did you come here for,
料理人 くん?
Mr. Chef?
~
In context, it appears Lau is calling Bard out— perhaps Bard is stalling for time because he’s sympathetic, perhaps arguing they don’t know enough yet to act. He doesn’t want to kill Ada or the other fellow soldiers, who he may see as innocents— and it’s possible that Bard has a problem with killing innocent people, unlike Lau, who, as a mafia boss (and a young one), is more like Ciel. He’s looking at the big picture rather than seeing the individuals.
So I think essentially what Lau is saying—perhaps with a veiled threat of “if you get in my way I’ll do the job myself”— is something along these lines:
“Isn’t this one of the blood collection facilities the earl sent us to destroy? Don’t you have a job you came here to do, Bard??”
~
It’s possible that Bard even has PTSD connected to the slaughter of innocents—it wasn’t unheard of for Native women and children to be killed during the Indian Wars. If Bard is basically a good guy (as this chapter seems to support), it would be understandable if killing innocent people when he was a soldier traumatized him.
It’s also possible Bard may have had a family who was killed, and that’s where his reticence to kill those who haven’t attacked him/may not be directly involved comes from. Perhaps he wasn’t talking out of his ass when he introduced himself to the other soldiers.
If Bard is a bit of a “softie,” then it’s possible Ciel/Sebastian purposefully paired him with Lau, knowing that the mafia boss is more cold hearted and would either be able to persuade Bard into action or do the job himself, if necessary.
Even if Yana has claimed she doesn’t care about names, I find it interesting that the kanji for Lau’s name (劉) originally meant “slaughter.”
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The Strange Case of The Strangetown Metamorphosis
There is a mysterious Sim that appears in Strangetown.
That's like saying "there is a fish that appears in the ocean", I know, so I'll be a little more specific.
They are an adult whose memories show inconsistencies with those of their family members. Something is missing!
Alright. That's also not saying much, that's like half of the premades in vanilla, non-clean hoods.
They are immediately recognizable by their appearance and, dare I say it, have distinguishing features unique to them.
Well, that also kinda fits everyone...
They feature in more than one installment of the series.
Again, not that helpful. I mean, almost everybody from the base game hoods is (for better or worse) represented in TS3 or TS4.
They appear in TS2 for PSP!
Hmm...
They are a member of a wealthy family connected to science and paranormal.
And...
They are somehow connected to (possible) cloning.
I imagine that now you’re probably rolling your eyes and asking: Why didn’t I just simply say I was going to talk about Bella Goth?
Because... I’m not!
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It’s Loki Beaker. In this mini-essay I’m going to speak about Loki, what is the mystery around him, what hints are there and what are some of the theories and which one do I fancy.
It’s basically a routine round of the popular game “connect EAxis’ oversights and glue them together into a headcanon”.
So without further ado, let me introduce you to:
The Mystery of Loki Beaker!
0: Preface: Loki who?
“As soon as he perfects his latest invention, Loki is sure to get the recognition he knows he deserves. In the meantime, he keeps himself busy by trying to assemble a nuclear reactor out of common household items.”
On the first glance, Loki as a Sim seems quite straightforward. He is a Knowledge Sim with a very eccentric personality. All his trait points are in the extremes, as you can see:
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He is a scientist, a competent one at that, as proven by his high career level and the fun fact that some of the game’s horrible machinery you can buy for Aspiration points is attributed to his creation.
(It explains why are the Beakers the only ones who have the stuff lying around by default. It is normal for a Strangetown family to own a non-buyable reward object or two but those are career rewards, the Beakers are the only one who canonically own Aspiration points rewards.)
Even though he knows his stuff when it comes to his profession, he is very corrupt and tests his questionable projects on his captive, Nervous Subject.
To say that Loki is unpopular would be an understatement. No one but his wife Circe likes Loki, even his own sister is indifferent towards him. Yes, he has a sister. Her name is Erin and she also lives in Strangetown with a colorful collection of roommates.
Nothing mysterious about him so far. (apart from his eyebrows)
1: Characterization fallen apart
And then The Sims 3 happened. It was actually quite late into the game’s life cycle, the early 2013, when a beautiful nordic-themed world was released on TS3 Store. Its name was Aurora Skies and it featured Loki, Erin and their parents.
TS3 Loki is a child and Erin is a toddler.
Now I haven’t actually played Aurora Skies. I own (and love) TS3 but the price range for the Store worlds is too high for me, content-to-money wise. So there might be some hidden clues about the Beakers in their house or relationship panels that I haven’t been able to inspect but... not to sound cynical but I doubt it. I doubt such attention was given to detail of this family in Aurora Skies, as they don’t even have individual bios.
But... that is... fine? I mean, we have Loki’s TS2 bio...
Nope. Sure we do. And it would be fine if hair color and ambitions weren’t the only thing Loki and his younger self (from now on referred to as smol Loki) had in common.
Let’s take a look on smol Loki’s personality.
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The first noticeable thing is that there is not a trace of Loki’s trademark villainy. He’s not Mean Spirited, he’s not Evil, he’s not even a No Sense of Humor Sim. His extreme neatness and hyperactivity are nowhere to be seen either. While it is true that TS3′s capabilities of defining personality are very limited as it picks “outstanding points” rather than a position of each trait on a scale, and it only has 5 slots (and tiny teeny 3 for children), it doesn’t make any sense still for the devs not to pick some more loki-esque traits for the precious slots they had.
Unless...
They didn’t care about Loki’s personality and there were no deeper intentions.
Unless the devs were trying to purposefully show us new angles of his character that either got suppressed while he was growing up, or manifest in ways that TS2′s scale system wasn’t able to show.
Could the Lucky trait in particular have had something to do with the change?
(Also, those traits of smol Loki are reason why I usually go for a Family Secondary Loki in TS2 and thus make Strangetown the purgatory of two unstable blonde Knowledge/Family sciency guys.)
We also must not omit that even though smol Loki didn’t display any of them, he still had all of Loki’s signature traits in him, as Loki in TS2 has his actual personality synced with the genetic one, meaning that there was something in there that caused him not to act so mean that got lost as he grew up. In other words, something brought up the worst in him.
And that’s not all. Smol Loki is not a regular TS3 child. You see, in TS3, premade children aren’t particularly known for being highly skilled experts. Neither are in TS2, for that matter, and it’s okay. It’s realistic.
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Smol Loki has a skill maxed.
It is very rare for a premade regardless of age to already start with a maxed skill and I personally don’t know of any other premade children that do.
And it’s writing.
What does writing have to do with Loki? Does Loki write? Probably he has to, those academic papers aren’t gonna spawn out of thin air, but that’s not what the writing skill in TS3 (or the hidden writing skill in TS2) are about. They’re about creative writing only.
Ok, ok. How high is Loki’s Creativity skill, then? In TS2, skills are much broader, they more resemble skillsets than individual skills, and writing categorizes under Creativity. Bring out the skill panel!
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Two. He has 2 points in Creativity. That is... low. That is actually very low, especially for a Sim that has supposedly been writing for fun since childhood. (and was a prodigy, while we’re at it) It is safe to say, I think, that if the player doesn’t make him do it, Loki doesn’t write anymore and he hasn’t been doing that for a long, long time.
While I would cynically admit that the dissonance in personalities might be just the lack of damns given from EAxis’ side, this seems to me too on the nose to be unintentional.
They would have no reason to bring the Beakers back without the “evil scientists” thing in mind. I mean, that’s what they’re iconic for. That’s what they’re recognizable by. (apart from their eyebrows)
So the person who was in charge of creating smol Loki probably knew they were recreating “Loki the mad scientist”.
So when they were picking the skill they use to demonstrate that this kid is gonna go far, they thought... “evil scientist = writing”...?
I would understand going for Creativity in general. I mean, Loki’s an inventor. That comes with the territory. But creativity as such isn’t really a skill in TS3. It’s divided to different activities.
Wouldn’t it make more sense just in general to pick logic, then? I mean, Loki isn’t that extremely logical by default but it is his second strongest skill and a feature unmistakably connected to being a scientist.
That’s what leads me to believe that writing plays a role in the story and it was chosen on purpose.
So how did a sweet little family-oriented boy talented with words transform into the ruthless catboy inventor we know and love?
And that, my friends, is the mystery of Loki Beaker.
2: A closer look at our environmentalist friends, the Beakers
If we want to get the full picture and come to a satisfying conclusion of some sorts, we need to inspect smol Loki’s surroundings. Maybe there is a clue to the continuous force or a traumatic event that shifted smol Loki’s direction in life?
Loki’s and Erin’s parents are named Gundrun and Bjorn. Even though their age would still allow it, they’re not present at the start of TS2′s Strangetown play, they’re long dead. Bjorn died before Erin became an adult and Gundrun died shortly before her son’s engagement to Circe. Because they died by the time Loki had (presumably) already long enrolled in his current life-path, we can safely rule out any tragic early death of parental figures scenario as a possible answer.
Gundrun is the only Beaker that canonically also writes. She has 5 points in the writing skill. She also shares some traits with Loki, namely the smarts and ambition.
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But she has little to do with science and is way more business-oriented which is a trait she shares with Circe’s ancestors, for example her father. Maybe the families knew each other from business ventures even before they moved to Strangetown? It is stated in their memories that Loki and Circe first met when they were children. But I digress!
Anyway, I don’t see anything in Gundrun that would suggest any abusive behavior towards her son that might have triggered his drastic change. Possibly but not necessarily she might’ve been a bit absent but nothing out of ordinary.
And now the father, Bjorn.
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Bjorn is the sciency half of the couple and works as an Aquatic Ecosystem Tweaker. Again, he has zero traits that would raise any red flags and he shares 4 out of 5 traits with either smol Loki or Loki. (I don’t know if Loki is a “natural cook” but he cooks quite well, so I think that counts.)
What’s interesting about Bjorn, though, is his speech that serves as a flavor text for the Aurora Skies store page.
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(Image transcript: “Do it for science! Science is everywhere around us, but at Aurora Skies it’s not just something you learn; it’s something you do!  We need bright young minds to make the dreams of the future a reality. Even now we’re finding more uses for garbage to help the planet. Charging batteries, powering machines - the sky is the limit. Just this last year we created a modified Hot Air Baloon using garbage as fuel and turning it into pure air with a pine breeze scent.  Now you can have efficient travel and an amazing romantic adventure with no cost to the ozone (or your nose)! Every year we’re creating more and more exciting things in the world of science. Garbage-powered hearts, heart-powered cars, solar-powered cats; what will you think of next!  It’s all up to you. Do it for Science! Did you know? Hot Air Balloons are an epic form of travel based around the simple principle that hot air is lighter than cold air.  They lift in the air based on the heat system in the balloon. Increasing the temperature of the air inside the balloon makes it lighter than the air outside and the balloon begins to float.  More air is required to lift heavier things; that’s why the balloons have to be so huge! How cool (or hot!) is that?”)
From this piece of text we can see Bjorn’s passion and dedication to “green” science. Nothing in his traits suggests he fakes it, so I think it’s safe to believe that this peppy idealist is a glimpse into Loki’s father’s genuine self.
He might have encouraged his children to follow in his footsteps (”We need bright young minds to make the dreams of the future a reality.“) and smol Loki, who later in life seemed to have similar levels of enthusiasm (science is his One True Hobby), might have been receptive to that.
Now just close your eyes for a second and imagine an alternate reality in which Loki picked up where Bjorn left and instead of a energy-refilling machine that electrocutes you if you’re not happy enough, he invented “solar-powered cats”.
Still no hints on what could’ve messed Loki up, though.
Let’s take a look at the parents in TS2. Even though they’re not present and aren’t even resurrectable, they’re still coded in the game for purposes of genetics, memories and family trees, so some of their characteristics are salvageable.
And by the Watcher, they were both Romance Sims.
They were workaholic Romance Sims who cared about the environment and liked recycling (and Hot Baloons).
And they were both extremely Nice and very Sloppy, if their personalities on wiki are something to go by. Which they unfortunately aren’t, at least not completely because most ancestors don’t simply have “their own” personalities and use presets instead, so they tend to be quite similar.
The same goes for most of the Beaker clan, unfortunately. Fun fact is that there is no Knowledge Sim in sight (before Loki, of course). Maybe they weren’t a scientist family, but a bunch of Romance Sims who used to spend their free time in between woohoos saving the planet with eco-science. (3 out of 6 of Loki’s and Erin’s ancestors were Romance Sims, 2 were Fortune and 1 was Family)
But! There is one outlier. Her name is Gertrude Beaker. She is Loki’s paternal grandmother.
And similarly to her grandson, she certainly has a personality to remember.
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She doesn’t use a preset, this is a personality that someone went and manually assigned (...or generated) for her. And she is Neat, Outgoing and doesn’t have a nice bone in her body. But unlike Loki, she has a sense of humor (which makes her even more dangerous, in my opinion) and is extremely Lazy.
She is a Fortune Sim and the only Beaker who shares the darker sides of Loki’s personality. (to be clear, I don’t mean their taste for cleaning but the round 0 of Nice points)
Because she doesn’t feature in TS3 at all, it is safe to say that she wasn’t in her grandchildren’s lives until the family moved to Strangetown. Could she be the corrupting influence on smol Loki?
As far as personality comparison goes, she seems to be the only possible culprit, the only one who’s personality shares the same unpleasant qualities he became infamous for. But! That’s not saying much. There is no evidence she actually did anything.
There’s not even any evidence that she ever met her grandson, given he has no memory of her dying which means she might have died before he was even born. That would be a solid evidence on the contrary and would rule her out. But I’m leaving some maneuvering space for theories here because she is the only Beaker ancestor with custom personality, after all, and that is suspicious.
That’s all the Beakers we know of if not counting Atom and Ceres, who came after Loki, so they’re not relevant to the question of his childhood. Or... are they?
3: And that’s when the trouble began
Another part of this question that might help us discern what happened to Loki is the when. All we know so far is that there is a big void of unknown between smol Loki and regular Loki and the point of transformation happened in there somewhere.
Thankfully, we have something to give us an idea. It’s this snapshot in storytelling pictures for the Beakers:
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It shows smol Loki destroying a dollhouse. It seems to be in an impersonal environment of some sorts. The cheapest bed in the game is against a bare white wall, the window is hid behind blue curtains and there doesn’t really seem to be anything else but the dollhouse, a teddy bear in the background and that... very unpleasant bed.
It clearly tells us that Loki’s shift started in his pre-teen years.
And seeing that room which is definitely not in the Beaker Castle at 1 Tesla Court, it makes me think of a hotel or a cheap apartment the family was staying in while moving from Aurora Skies to Strangetown. Maybe the castle-like something the household inhabits at the start of the game wasn’t a property of the Beakers at all, maybe that was where the Salamises used to live and now it belongs to Circe?
Anyway, could it had been leaving Aurora Skies that sent smol Loki down an existential crisis and settling in the not exactly welcoming environment of Strangetown, enrolling in a local school, that sealed it?
But why all the stuff with writing? This would work with any other hobby but somehow it had to be writing and it’s our task to find out why.
4: Not your average tragedy
Now in our search we already have some ideas but it wouldn’t be thorough if we didn’t take into account smol Loki’s actual personality. I mean, we went into what traits he doesn’t have but what about those he has?
Namely Lucky and Family-Oriented.
I think Lucky is a very interesting choice. There’s nothing inherent about Loki Beaker that would make you go “that’s one lucky guy!” (if you don’t count his relationship with Circe as a stroke of luck, that is) and the same goes for smol Loki.
But... it could be a clue. His metamorphosis either couldn’t be triggered by trauma because he’s lucky and it would avoid him, or it must’ve been something tremendously horrid so he’s lucky he’s still alive.
Now we know we are searching for something that happened in his late childhood, verging on the start of his teenage years. His family was going through the turmoil of moving to a desert and he has already known his future partner Circe. Meanwhile Erin-
Oh, wait. Erin.
Smol Loki was Family-Oriented which implies he would probably have a good relationship with his little sister, as he would’ve naturally inclined to protect her and help his parents take care of her. But!
Not only do they have an amicable but distant relationship as adults but Erin seems to forget that Loki even existed in her childhood.
He has the usual set of memories of a sibling growing up well but she doesn’t, she has no Loki-related memories at all, not even of his marriage, which was a quite recent event.
Could the reason for Loki’s “downfall” be somehow related to his sister? Was there a dramatic event in which she lost a part of her memory?
5: Theories!
Ok, we’re finally here! Now I try to present some theories about what might’ve happened.
1. Burdens of the golden child
In Aurora Skies, Loki used to be the little wonder every relative was gushing about. With his father as an acclaimed scientist and a very liked person in general, there was little to no adversity his son had to face. He followed his passion and having nobody to really compare himself to, nor anybody who would terrorize him, he prospered.
But then the Beakers moved. Strangetown was... different. It was way smaller than Aurora Skies, so everybody inherently knew everybody and everybody had to interact with everybody... because the small space of a desert community didn’t leave them with any choice. And it was bleak and unfriendly. No one except for the Salamises knew the Beakers, so they found themselves under scrutiny from their new neighbors.
So Loki, who used to live thinking he was unique, was now sitting everyday in a much smaller classroom with Pascal and Vidcund Curious, whom he was immediately being compared to. But he wasn’t like the Curiouses. He was a kid of a scientist but wasn’t a science kid. He didn’t have much in common with Pascal who approached him and tried to befriend him at first but he wanted to. In Strangetown, nothing seemed to be cooler than being really, really into science. Pascal’s and Loki’s communication attempts were rather poor, though, and in the end, they never made friends. Loki slowly began to disdain the oldest Curious boy and it culminated a few years later in high school when Pascal made an attempt to woo Circe. It was even worse with Vidcund. Ever since Loki’s first day at the new school, Vidcund had been eyeing him with a disgusted look and Loki became quick to reciprocate.
In Strangetown, nothing seemed to be cooler than being really, really into science. Even Circe was on it! She was the only person his age he has know in Strangetown before his family moved in and he liked her. Not “like” liked her, yuck! But he thought she was cool. Her family used to visit the Beakers in Aurora Skies and they played together. She was a friend! Or so Loki thought. She seemed to like hanging out with the Curiouses much more.
In Strangetown, nothing seemed to be cooler than being really, really into science, yes. But not in the eyes of Buzz Grunt, the son of a general who lived in Strangetown. Their family were the self-proclaimed protectors of the hood but at the same time they weren’t shy to show a strong distaste for all that made Strangetown an important desert settlement in the first place. And little Buzz, although Loki doubted he understood the nuances, was very fond of asserting his dominance over his less sporty and hyper-masculine classmates.
Suddenly jealous of the Curious brothers, under pressure from both the adults and his peers comparing him to them and bullied by Buzz, Loki’s social life fell apart. He started having problems... and he came up with solutions. He has always liked science but from back then on he hyperfixated on it to prove everybody who picked on him for being a worthless parody of a science kid wrong.
Not only his social life and self-confidence were busted, though. Moving away from Aurora Skies to Strangetown that had much higher prices for housing because of the limited space, the living standards for the Beakers lowered. It was chaotic and uncomfortable. Plus, almost everybody in Strangetown was loaded. Why, Circe and her parents lived in a small castle! Loki felt like they’re the only “poor” family around and it played into his new-found insecurities.
And then there was Erin’s accident. She suffered a severe head injury and even though she fortunately survived, she was never... the same. She had issues with her memory. Loki tried to convince himself that he’s big enough not to cry but when they were visiting Erin in the hospital and she didn’t recognize him, he cried. It was his little sister! And... it was all his fault anyway! If he was quicker and pushed her to safety, she would’ve been fine! Or even better, he wished the car would’ve hit him instead.
Loki was becoming more and more snappy, focused on his grades and projects, unavailable. The siblings never mended their relationship, Erin, even though she recovered, never got to make new memories with her brother. Not remembering them growing up together, he was like a stranger to her. A scary mean teenage boy she didn’t know and, even though she was a very friendly child, she was too intimidated to willingly spend time with him. And Loki was always busy and moreover, he felt guilty and inexplicably angry, so he postponed approaching her, until it was too late, he was in college, she was in high school and it was too awkward.
And... there was no time to write anymore.
2. Gertrude the Neat and Mean (and Lazy)
Ok, Loki doesn’t have any memories of his grandma. But hear me out! Erin does not have any of him either and yet they met. This theory doesn't require any additional write up – he simply got under the influence of his 0 Nice points granny and she cultivated him to be just like her.
My personal take: This is maybe my least favorite theory of them all, even though it is quite straightforward. It doesn't take much into consideration and demonizes Gertrude, who as far as we know, might not done anything wrong.
3. The accident
This theory takes advantage of TS3's canon sciency machinery, namely Cerebralizing Brain Enhancing Machine 2.0.
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It can, among other things, change a Sim's personality. There is (quite unfortunately, in my opinion) no chance of consequential failure in the actual game, the most it can do is to (non-fatally) electrocute your Sim. But...
Imagine smol Loki sneaking into his dad's laboratory, most probably at his workplace.
He was curious. Ever since his father showed him all the equipment in there, all he could think of was the machine that made people smarter.
Maybe it could make him smarter?
I mean, Loki knew he was already quite smart. At least, he's been told he was and he had no reason not to believe it.
But he could be even smarter.
He could be like his dad. Or his mom. Or Erin. Everyone was talking about how clever young Erin seemed. Loki was proud of her but part of him just wanted that, too.
So what if... he went to dad's laboratory, just for a little while, and made himself smarter?
He made all the necessary preparations. It meant to memorize dad’s schedule, so he knew just the time when he could sneak into the laboratory. It also meant to get a good costume so he won’t be recognizable on the security footage!
And then finally, he was ready. To infiltrate the laboratory was easy enough but it only made Loki more nervous. He was on the edge but determined. He wanted to make it big in the world. He needed to seize the opportunity. And fear... fear was there to be ignored! Hands, stop trembling!
His confidence grew a bit once he got to the machine itself. He knew how to run it thanks to his dad and it made him feel competent and ready.
Little did he know that there was a huge oversight. Although Loki could operate the technology on a very basic level, his knowledge went nowhere near deep enough for him to detect that the machine has yet another set of settings and those currently expect an adult user. It wasn’t configured for a child patient.
But unaware of that, the boy in his patchy dinosaur costume climbed on top of the machine and with his eyes wide open and his heart racing he connected the Brain Enhancer to his system. Then, with his hand sweating, he pushed a button on a remote he was clutching to.
When Bjorn, alerted by Loki’s screams, rushed into the laboratory, it was way too late.
As his terrified father was calling the ambulance, the child was alive and even still awake. He was too weak to cry. He just watched Bjorn, wishing for death and looking for signs of wrath in father’s eyes.
There were none. Only fear.
Physically, Loki Beaker managed to recover just fine. With the power of advanced medicine and plastic surgery, the burns he suffered were reduced to nothing but almost invisible scars.
But inside, he was never the same. Literally. Even though the procedure backfired horribly, it still worked to some extend - but even that extend was warped. Loki succeeded in giving himself the Genius trait but several of his traits were replaced also, including the Lucky trait that probably saved his life.
6: Conclusion!
I like Loki very much. (no sh*t, who would’ve guessed) He’s a very controversial and over-the-top character who tends to be rather unpredictable in the actual gameplay. I started writing this giant thing to find an answer to his backstory that would satisfy me and hopefully also some of you.
With a heavy heart I conclude I’m not successful.
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First I have to admit I originally planned to present 5 theories instead of 3 but I scrapped 2 of them.
First was about Atom time traveling and replacing Loki, creating himself again and again in a time loop (would explain the huge personality difference between smol Loki and Loki-Atom) and it was very far-fetched but fun, alas I realized it was out of character for Atom, since he seems to love his sister and his Plumbot so much he would hardly leave them behind to pull that off.
The second was about Nervous and the corrupting power of Death he has inside that would slowly drive Loki and Circe “evil” even though it’s unclear whether they first adopted him with being a lab-rat in mind. But it would not make sense since a change like that would be visible on their personality panels. That’s not that important, though. What made me not include this theory is that it feels uncomfortably victim blame-y. It’s not directly since it wouldn’t be Nervous’ fault anyway but any attempt to shift the blame from Loki and Circe in this situation feels uncomfortable.
(To be clear, I don’t think the Beakers deserve demonization. In my opinion, the best way to treat them narrative-wise is like eccentric people capable of feeling love and doing good things sometimes, yet irredeemably self-centered, morally bankrupt and deserving a lifetime in jail for child abuse they have done on Nervous. Not one-dimensional but still villains and still objectively bad people.)
And those 3 theories above? They could’ve been better.
I think I like the first the most, even though I still feel like something is missing. I just tend to like relatively grounded explanations and this one doesn’t feature the supernatural nor any deus ex machina gadget.
What about you? And do you have any other theories? Sky’s the limit! It’ll make my day to hear them!
Whatever your takes are, they’re all valid.
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itariilles · 4 years
Text
My Statement on Tolkien 2019
[ French translation and German translation availible. ]
It has been incredibly difficult for me to speak on my experiences regarding my experiences of hostility and othering in spaces that I loved and still hold dear to my heart, and for that reason I have been silent. That is until now. 
I have decided that now is the right time for me to come forward with my experience and statement regarding my negative experience as a person of colour engaging in Tolkien spaces. 
I want people involved in the wider Tolkien community to reflect on their roles in the specific spaces they inhabit, and how you can foster a better environment for marginalised groups to interact and engage with those spaces in a safe and inclusive manner. 
Take your time to listen and put effort into listening to fans of colour when they are speaking about their lived experiences and their grievances especially when they are speaking about a topic as personal as racism. Being critical of a work you love and the media surrounding it is not easy thing, but we need to recognise that these criticisms are valid and deserve to be taken seriously when it affects a collective of people across different backgrounds. 
I want to preface this by stating that I am speaking only for myself and my own lived experience as a vocal young non-black POC in a predominantly white space. I acknowledge that my experience is by no means universal or indicative of all POC in Tolkien fandom spaces. 
I also understand that real life interactions differ widely from interactions on online fandom spaces, but there are disturbing similarities across both online and real life spaces with specific regard to the environment and treatment of vocal POC in both. 
The tragedy is many people do not realise their impact not only on the individuals involved, but on the wider attitude towards POC voices in fandom when the topic of racism is discussed. We need to build safe environments where critical discussions of diversity and race from the people most affected by them are taken to heart, not invalidated or spoken over as targets of microaggressions. 
To give a bit of context, Tolkien 2019 was an in person conference organised by the Tolkien Society (which I was a member of at the time). The official website for Tolkien 2019 has been taken down but the Tolkien Society has a nice summary written in August 2018 breaking down the event here. 
I was approached by the Education Secretary at the time about my possible involvement in a panel discussing the history and future of the Tolkien Society which I elaborate on further in my statement. It was the first time I had felt that I had a platform where I could freely express my voice as a diverse reader and consumer of Tolkien media who held diversity in Tolkien as a core value in the wider Tolkien brand. 
I felt that as the only non-white member on the panel I had an obligation to speak out on the topic of diversity when it was raised. I tried to speak briefly about some of the points and discourses I had heard on portrayals of diversity in Tolkien media with as much nuance as I could manage at the time. In response to some points I had made I was met with vocal disapproval by some audience members and visible signs of disapproval and hostile body language from others. 
This was made even more jarring when later during the course of the event when two white creators hinted at vague notions of diversity were met with a far greater degree of approval. The former instance was during the context of a panel regarding the upcoming LOTR on Prime series, and the latter was during a talk presented by the chair of the Tolkien Society.
I felt intimidated and reluctant to involve myself any further in the Tolkien fandom, especially in real life spaces as my experience at Tolkien 2019 had only solidified and reaffirmed my fears and unease I had engaging in a predominantly white fandom with few visible POC members and creators who tackle topics of diversity and racism in both the community and source texts.
Following this event I was approached by an affiliate of one of the attendees who very kindly took the time to listen to me and suggested that I should write a statement in response to my experience. To my knowledge, my statement has not been shared or published on any platform yet and this will be the first time I have ever spoken about it publicly. 
Since then some of my thoughts and opinions on certain aspects of Tolkien fandom and meta have shifted or evolved which I will hopefully expand on in the future, but I wanted to share my initial unchanged statement I wrote reflecting my immediate reaction to my experience. 
I want to be seen as a Tolkien creative and critical thinker above anything else, but I cannot move forward with my work without speaking about my lived experience in a space which has been consistently hostile to me and so many others across different Tolkien spaces for so many years starting with my account of this one experience.
I hope my statement finds itself in good hands and I will always be willing to engage with others about my experiences so long as you engage with me in good faith. 
The statement I wrote on 25/09/2019 is as follows:
From the 9th to 11th of August of this year I attended a conference held by the Tolkien society aptly named “Tolkien 2019” that advertised itself as the “largest celebration of Tolkien ever held by the Society” in which I both spoke as a panelist and independant speaker. The event itself was a mixture of both formal and informal panels, papers presented by selected members of the society, and evening social events.
My invitation to speak on the “History of the Tolkien Society” panel was presented as deliberate choice made by the panel organiser as a gateway for discussion about diversity and representation in Tolkien. On the official programme, the panel was described as a discussion concerning “what the Tolkien Society and Tolkien fandom in general may become as it encounters digital spaces, issues of representation and diversity, academic interest and a myriad other factors that make up our lived experience today”.
Although there was much excitement and anticipation on my half in the weeks and days leading up to the event, it soon turned to dread when the tone and climate of the discussion dawned on me when I took my seat alongside five other panelists ranging from seasoned Tolkien scholars, long-time members of the Society, and a member with a leadership position within the Society. On that four person panel, I was the only one racialised as non-white. In fact, I was one of only three people in a room of approximately fifty to sixty people racialised as non-white.
It wasn’t long before the true motive of placing me — a young, new member of the Society, who felt already out of place and out of my depth even being offered the opportunity to participate in the first place — on a panel of what I perceived to be more seasoned members of the society.
When the topic of diversity and representation in the Tolkien fandom was raised by the moderator, I saw it as an opportunity for me to share my own experiences as a young fan who predominantly consumed Tolkien content online, as well as some observations I had made regarding the current pop-cultural perception of Tolkien as being heavily influenced, if not wholly entered around the Peter Jackson trilogies and being deeply ingrained with the issues that seep from those interpretations into our overall perception of the Tolkien brand.
One of the talking points that seemed to have caused the biggest uproar and dissent was one in which I referred Tolkien’s description of Sam’s hands as brown in two instances — the first in the Two Towers, and the second instance in Return of the King and how this has been translated into film as both literal and symbolic interpretations. The former in the Ralph Bakshi’s the “Lord of the Rings” released in 1978 in which I noted that the decision to portray Sam as more ethnically ambiguous compared to the other Hobbits was a deliberate choice, whereas the latter was depicted in the recent Peter Jackson trilogy released in the early 2000’s took the description symbolically and cast the white American actor Sean Astin for the role.
The backlash I received for this was, I believe, absolutely disproportionate to the views I expressed. I saw members frown and grunt in disapproval, as well as some visibly shake their heads at me. In spite of me parroting how I saw both interpretations as equally valid as a defence mechanism in the face of such an aggressive response to what to me seemed like an innocuous observation made by a young person of colour who did not see many portrayals of people of colour in Tolkien. 
Comments such as “I don’t care who they cast as Sam whether he’s black, brown, yellow, blue or green!” and “Tolkien’s message is universal I don’t see how race factors into this!” were shouted in between points I was making, and countless others were made as an effort to dismiss the effort I put in to hopefully start an open dialogue about the lack of diversity in adaptations of Tolkien and how it has coloured our perception of the overall brand, and perhaps fantasy as a whole.
Some other talking points I decided to mention included Peter Jackson’s Easterlings (coded as being North African or Middle Eastern in the film) as being appallingly Orientalist and damaging in a post-911 world, as well as referring to Tolkien’s vague descriptions of certain characters and people groups that can be interpreted as ethnic coding or perhaps hint at a more diverse cast than the popular brand of Tolkien that may have us believe. I iterated that it is the responsibility of consumers of Tolkien and Tolkien related media to push for different interpretations of the text in order to break the perception that Tolkien’s works are entirely Anglo and Eurocentric with no place for people of colour in the vast world he had created in my opinion as a love letter to his own.
A month later it is still difficult for me to fully wrap my head around what I had experienced during the conference, much less articulating it in a statement, but if there is a note I would like to conclude on it would be this: it was never about changing Tolkien’s works, but reinterpreting his 20th century text littered with colonial artefacts and reimagining the foundations of his work through a 21st century lens in an attempt to decolonise the interpretation of his works in popular culture.
To change the way we read, write and depict the Tolkien brand is to fundamentally change the landscape of the entire genre of fantasy which has and still derives so heavily from Tolkien’s works and the global Tolkien brand.
End.
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theloveoftoms · 3 years
Text
Senior Year - High School Joe Mazzello au
Summary: It is Alexis Bradley’s first day of senior year. After moving to San Diego during the summer, Alexis is unsure what to expect at her new High School. She wants to make friends, but she knows that can be easier said than done. After having troubles at the vending machine Alexis is introduced to a handsome boy, Joe Mazzello, who both helps her get her lunch from the vending machine and helps her navigate her new life at Cabrillo High.
A/N: Hi darlings!! This is my first ever Joe Mazzello/borhap fanfic. As of right now, it is ongoing, so be on the look out for new chapters every week or so. This story starts off kinda slow - only because I wanted to fully introduce my characters Alexis to you guys before jumping into a fully written fic -  but I can assure you that there will be plenty of swoon worthy moments coming in the next couple of chapters! I hope you enjoy my story! Happy reading. - m xxx
Read the other parts of this story....
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, more chapters coming soon!!!
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San Diego, California 
A new day. A new school. A new city. I whispered to myself as I ran my fingers through my sandy blonde hair. Who known, maybe it’ll be like TopGun and I’ll meet a hottie like maverick and we’ll date and go on motorcycle rides and go to the beach... 
“Gosh,” I sighed, clearing my head from this unlikely fantasy. “Senior year, where on earth did you come from,” I said aloud as I checked the time on my phone, skipping to the next song. 
The clock turned to 8:19 as Queen’s “Seven Seas of Rhye” began to play through on the cars speakers. 16 minutes until class. Only 10 months until school ends and I'm free. 
Humming along to the music, I sent my mom a text, “heading in now. Test u at lunch. xx Lexi.” How cool am I. Sitting here in the parking lot of my new high school texting my mother, listening to music from the 70′s. Popular kids could never! 
Waiting for the song to finish, I turned off my Toyota, an d retired my dusty pink backpack from the back seat. Slinging it over my shoulder as I lock the car door, I notice others in the parking lot walking towards the school. I follow them to the front, where I can see the ginormous building for myself. It is so much bigger than my old school. Not to mention, it seems so much better than my old school. For starters, during my orientation in the summer, I learnt from the principle that there are so many sports teams here (more than just football, volleyball and basketball!). There are lacrosse teams, swim teams, even a freaking golf team! And the food in the cafeteria is supposed to be healthy and nutritions - a much better step up from the undercooked chicken wings from my old high school in Glendale. And for academics, they have just about every class imaginable. 
Beneath the American flag, flapping in the wind are little pods of students, chatting and laughing amongst themselves. On the left by the blue picnic tables, were guys standing in a large circle, tossing a football around. And to the right, infront of potted flowers, there was a hoard of girls taking their first day of school ootd photos. Strange but not unusual. 
Everyone looked so perfect beneath the early morning sun. The girls in their dresses and skirts, and the guys in their monochromatic school sports attire. As I pushed back the glass doors to the school, noticing my green and white blouse and black Levis shorts, I couldn't help but feel already a bit out of place.
With my schedule in hand, I trudged down the hallway until I reached the first set of stairs to the second floor. As I ascended the staircase I noticed how bright and fresh the school felt. There were no grimy stains on the walls, the lockers appeared clean, and there was a surplus of natural light. Pretty nifty for a public school. 
I found my history class at the end of the hall. Behind all of the individual desks, were panelled windows stretching from ceiling to mid-way down the wall. The windows were all behind the desks, letting the sun shine through making the room feel bright and airy. There were a couple of students in the class, but no teacher. So, naturally I took my seat in the third row - the perfect spot - not too far from the front but not too close either. 
As I took my seat, my phone buzzed in my pocket. “Have a fabulous day angel. Luv u, mama.” As cheesy as that reply from mom is, I really do cherish everything she puts into our relationship. 
When I was four, my father, who at the time was serving over seas in the military passed away due to a training accident. He left my mother, Melissa, to raise a four year old daughter and an 8 month old son to raise all by herself. I only have a couple memories of dad, but my brother Matt, due to his age at the time of the accident, sadly docent have any. I’m forever grateful that I was raised by such a strong woman who clearly made lemonade out of the lemons she was given. 
After taking my notebook and pencil case out of my backpack, I checked the time again. Now, 8:40, there is 5 minutes to class. Every so often a student would come in early from the hallway. They would walk in, look around for a brief moment, and then take their seat. So far, no one has sat next to me yet. I’m not sure if that is a good thing or a bad one. please no weirdos I prayed as the bell rang, just someone normal. 
Moments later, the bell rang, signalling the start of the school year. Students weaved into the classroom, finding their seats. The second bell rang, signalling that class was about to start. A girl with dark wavy hair sat next to me, but I’m guessing she only sat there to be near the guy on her left. The two of them have been talking since the moment she sat down.
The teacher walked in with a stack of papers beneath her arm, “Good morning class and welcome to possibly the most important class in high school,” She begun handing out the papers as she introduced herself as Ms. Jennings. As she passed by, she smiled sweetly and the smell of honey was left in her passing. 
“As soon as the announcements are finished you may begin this assignment,” she said, adjusting her sleek black hair into a low bun. “Now before you all go crazy worrying about a pop quiz you had no knowledge about, just give this a try and see how much you can tell me. This doesn't count towards your grade but your participation will be marked down in your work habits.”
Listening to the announcements, in an attempt to make myself look busy, I gazed around the classroom, looking at the variety of posters and paps plastered to the grey walls. There were plenty of maps as well as an assortment of black and white photos of various historical figures. There were photos of Martin Luther King Jr, Rosa Parks, JFK, Winston Churchill, Dictator Benito Mussolini, and many other well known figures.
“If you get stuck on any of these questions, you can talk amongst yourself to figure them out,” Ms. Jennings said, taking a seat at her desk, adjusting her lavender cardigan and black inky skirt, “I hope you all will enjoy this course as much as I do teaching it!” 
I grabbed a pen out of my pencil case and dated the paper. What is your name? read the first question. easy peasy. Alexis Bradley. Do you have an interest for history? yes!! Who is your favourite historical figure and why? Alan Turing. What he and his team did for the allies during ww2 was amazing - the war likely would have ended completely differently if he had not been so brilliant! And also... Canadian aeronautical engineer Elsie MacGill “Queen of the Hurricanes” the first woman to earn a aeronautical engineering degree! Why is history important to you? Is it important to you? History is important to me because the more we can learn about the past, we will be better educated to handle the challenges of the future. And lastly, tell me about yourself! I just moved here in the summer from Arizona. I really like it in San Diego and I enjoy walking on the beach during my free time!
The rest of History was spend reading over the syllabus and singing out text books. Ms. Jennings told us that our first assignment would be to complete the reading questions out of our textbook. It wasn't going to be due until Thursday - thankfully!
After History I had my study block. When I got to my next classroom - which was only a couple doors down from history, the teacher, a man well into his 60′s told us to sit wherever we wanted. He then introduced himself as Mr. Dupley and explained that this is the class where students could catch up on homework or just sit and relax on their phones. He said, “There are no grades in this class, just attendance, so its up to you with what you do in your time.” I like this class already!
For all of study hall I worked on my history questions. I got finished most of them, so I wouldn't have to do them on Thursday. 
It was lunch after study hall. As much as I had wanted to stay in the peaceful study hall classroom, I didn't pack a lunch today and boy was I hungry. 
I packed up my things and wandered down the stairs and to the cafeteria. It wasn't incredibly busy, but there were still plenty of students there. Many were waiting in line for fresh hot food served by staff, but there were also vending machines at the back of the cafeteria as well. 
The lines were dreadfully long, so I opted for going to one of the vending machines. There were about five different ones, each with the same assortment of drinks and snacks. I chose the one with the least amount of people, which in this case there was only one girl infront of me. 
After she had finished I took the folded 10 dollar bill out of my pocket and looked at all the snack options. PLEASE MAKE YOUR SELECTIONS BEFORE INSERTING MONEY. 
I clicked buttons b12 - for a bag of salt and vinegar chips - and h11 for a sunrise fruit bar. PLEASE INSERT MONEY IN THE SLOT BELOW. OR TAP YOU CARD NOW. I took the 10 dollar bill and straightened it out before inserting it in the bill reader. Just as the bill was almost all the way in, the machine sent the bill back out towards me. 
I flipped it over, straightening it out again. No use, the machine spat the bill back out again. “Ugh this can't be happening,” I said aloud, as I tried to shove the bill in once more. 
The unsettling noises of the vending machine bill reader sent the 10 dollars back out again. 
“Excuse me?” I heard a male voice from behind say. 
I turned to face the boy who was standing behind me. He was dressed in a black tee and a pair of loose blue jeans. He stands taller than me, with brown auburn hair. “This one can be pretty tricky some times,” he said gesturing to the bill in my hand, “may I?” 
I nodded, “be my guest.” 
The boy took the bill out of my hand and flattened it against the edge of the machine. He straightened it for a couple seconds and then inserted it into the machine. This time, it sucked the bill right up and dispensed my chips and fruit bar. 
“Hey, thanks!” I said as I bent down to retrieve my food and my change, “First day and I'm already learning something new.”
The boy put his hand in the pocket of his jeans, “First day?” he asked running a hand though his hair. 
I nodded, slipping the loose change into the pocket of my shorts. “Yeah, its my first day. I just moved here from Arizona actually.” 
The boy smiled, “Oh wow! Well welcome to Cabrillo. I’m Joe by the way.”
“I’m Alexis. It’s nice to meet you,” I said. 
Joe looked to a table to the right, “hey Alexis,” he begun, “do you want to come eat lunch with my friends and I?” 
am I making a friend? Is this really happening right now?!
“Sure,” I begun, trying not to sound too excited - I don't want to scare him off after all! “That sounds nice!” 
I follow Joe to a table with three others at it. There are two guys, one with tan skin and dark hair, the other with glasses, looks very tall. And one girl with features that appear to have been sculpted by the gods. 
“Alexis,” Joe begun, “This is Rami, Gwilym, and Lucy.” 
The three of them smiled at me, the one with the dark hair, Rami was it? said, “It’s nice to meet you Alexis.”
“She just moved here from Arizona,” said Joe, taking a seat beside Rami. 
“Welcome!” Said Lucy, smiling at me as I take a seat across from her, “It’s so good to finally see another girl at this table!” she chimed in the most posh English accent. 
I smiled, unsure of what to say next, “I love your accent!” 
Lucy took her hand and put it over her heart, “Aw thank you dear. Not too many others have this kind of voice around here.”
Gwilym laughed, “Besides me of course,” he spoke revealing his accent. 
“Gwil here is an exchange student, where as Lucy is a full time resident,” said Joe. 
Lucy nodded, “Yes. I moved here a couple of years ago from Birmingham with my parents.”
“And me, I go back at the end of the year. This will be my second year in America,” said Gwil. 
I nodded, “wow, that so cool!” 
“So Alexis, where about’s in Arizona are you from?” asked Rami, peeling back the plastic lid to his green salad. 
“I moved here from Glendale. It’s a smaller city inside of Phoenix. But I am originally from New York actually.”I said. 
Joe’s eyes lit up, “New York?”
I nodded, “Yeah, I moved to Glendale when I was about four.”
“Joe here is a bit of a New York fan himself. He used to live there too,” said Rami. 
I looked over to Joe, “Wow. Small world!” 
While Rami, Gwil, and Lucy were deep in conversation, Joe once again directed his gaze, and attention to me. “So Alexis,” he begun, “What classes do you have this afternoon?” 
I pulled my schedule out of my pocket, “English and then Biology. What about you?”
“By chance do you have Mrs. Fifield for English?” he asked. 
I nodded, “Yes I do!”
“Looks like I’ll be seeing you later then,” he said, smiling. 
“Awesome.” 
Seriously Alexis. Awesome. What are you, in fifth grade?
“Did you say Biology?” interjected Lucy. 
“Yes. With Mr. Klein in room 244,” I said. 
“Ooh yay!” Lucy squealed, “We have Bio together.” 
I smiled, happy to know of someone in either one of my afternoon classes. 
For the rest of lunch, we al talked as a group. Asking each other questions that would help us get to know each other better. We talked about school related topics, as well as our personal interests out side of school. Everyone was so different but I could see how easily all four of them clicked together. 
Joe and his friends were all so welcoming towards me that I was actually hoping that lunch would have lasted just a bit longer. “Hope to see you again Alexis,” said Rami sincerely as he packed up his lunch. Gwil interjected, “Yeah, it was really nice chatting with you.” I said the same to them, and wished them a good afternoon. 
“See you later Alexis. Save me a seat in English,” said Joe, giving a friendly wave with his hand. 
“Will do Joe,” I smiled. 
Lucy and I walked to biology and found our seats up front. The desks have enough space for two people to sit at them, so it worked out perfectly.
Most of biology was spent going over the syllabus - just like in history - and getting a walk though of the lab. We had to do a quick worksheet on lab safety, which wasn't to hard to do, but it did end up taking the entire class. 
While we worked on out worksheet, Lucy and I enjoyed chatting with one another. She talked about Rami, who I later found out was her boyfriend. And she told me how she met Gwil one day in the library last year browsing the classic literature section. She had told me about everyone but Joe. 
I was beginning to grow curious about Joe, so I decided to ask her, “how did you meet Joe? What's he like?” 
Lucy relaxed in her chair, “Ah Joe. He's great,” she begun. “He is one of the most fun people you will ever meet. I met him though rami actually. The two of them have been friends for like what, 10 years.” 
“Woah, that's such a long time,” I said, “they must be really close.”
Lucy then proceeded to give me the entire back story on Rami’s family, and how he has a twin. It is safe to say that I learnt more about Lucy and Joe and all of their friends that I did in biology that day. 
After the bell rang, I said goodbye to Lucy, “See you tomorrow!” “Bye darling!” she replied. Gosh I love her accent. It is so posh. 
I was looking forward to seeing Joe in English. When I got there, he was already sitting at one of the desks. When he noticed me, his eyes lit up as he waved me over. 
“How does this spot look?” he asked, gesturing around the room. 
“It looks great.”
During English Joe and I both brainstormed ideas for our first assignments. The teacher wanted us to talk with our partners about each one of our interests and then as an assignment, make up a character profile for each other. 
This assignment could have been more perfect. 
“What is your favourite band?” Joe asked me, scribbling something down in his notebook. 
My heartbeat fluttered, I knew the answer in a second. “Queen,” I say proudly. 
Joe’s eyes lit up, “No way! Queen is my favourite too!”
A smile formed on my face, “Oh my gosh really? What’s your favourite song?” 
Joe set down his notebook, “Easily, Somebody to Love.” “And yours?” he asked.
I nodded, scribbling that down in my own notebook. “Mine,” I thought, “hmm. It would probably be Good Old Fashioned Lover boy but specifically the live version.”
“That is such a great song,” he said. 
I agreed, “I must have listed to it, like what, five times on the way here this morning,” I laughed. 
Joe laughed, “Clearly, we both have extraordinary taste!”
For the rest of class, Joe and I talked about music and our love of all things vintage. We were shocked by how much time had passed when the bell ran, dismissing us for the end of the day. 
“Ah shoot,” Joe begun, “we didn't finish the assignment.”
“haha, I think I had more fun talking about queen for an hour than I would have making a character chart,” I laughed. 
Joe laughed, folding up his notebook for the night. 
Joe pulled out a sticky note and scribbled something down on it, “Here’s my number.” he said handing me the sticky, “Give me a text if you have any more questions about me for the assignment, or even if you just want to chat!”
I nodded, “Will do. Have a good rest of the day Joe.”
“You too Alexis,” he said. 
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love-neptune · 3 years
Text
bnha x aot au + gn!reader
continuation of this post.
in all honesty this idea practically writes itself and idk where else to put it,, kinda gonna be in bakugo’s pov
when bakugo first receives the text from half n’ half he almost ignores it,, almost. but because deku’s part of the group chat he knows he’ll have to answer to avoid a load of spam texts to get him to reply
‘it’s about their case.’
huh? what the hell was that supposed to mean? half n’ half could be talking about just about any other- oh.
‘i’ll be there in 20.’ was deku’s reply and he was quick to send in ‘15’ before taking off.
arriving to todoroki’s office, bakugo stops to watch the half n’ half hero lift two very large paper bags up on his desk. now what could that be?
“manga?” he brows furrowed as todoroki pulls out stacks upon stacks of books that began piling up on his desk. the sound of the office door opening and closing was heard. deku apologizes for arriving ‘late’. yeah like two minutes makes a difference
todoroki grabs another book from inside the second bag and lays it down, it’s marked volume four and there are two copies, “take a look at the characters.”
deku grabs the first copy and examined the book and then begins to skim through. he takes a seat in the nearest chair and lets out a deep sigh. “this can’t be real.” the book is tossed back on the desk and deku leans back on his seat. he takes a deep breath, and bakugo isn’t sure if it’s to calm himself down or a sign of relief.
bakugo takes a long look at the copy in his hand. his grip only tightening when he finally takes a good look at the picture.
there sat eren yeager with what seemed to be friends of his. he could vaguely tell the where the other three stood. jean kirstein stood next to annie leonhart, eren appeared to be resting as he sat in the grass area and there behind him was yn, crouching down behind eren with that pretty smile of theirs.
they still seemed to be much younger than when they first disappeared and by the uniforms they all wore, they were soldiers. exactly what war they were training and fighting for none of them were sure.
“you’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” yet another copy of the volume was tossed back onto the desk.
“what sick bastard thinks this is entertaining?” bakugo reaches for the first volume before reading out loud the summary. “.. but the sudden appearance of an immense Titan is about to change everything. what the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“well I guess we’ll just have to find out then,” the half n’ half hero sighs as he handed deku a copy of the first volume before grabbing one himself.
seeing eren and his friends deal with the invasion of man eating giants was a tough pill to swallow. and when they finally had grown old enough to battle only to have Eren be swallowed whole by a Titan had each hero feeling nauseous.
by the end, shouto flipped through the pages again, “odd. there should be a page stating that the places and events were thought purely through the imagination of the author.”
there was silence. the same thought running through their minds. could this be the work of a quirk? who could possibly have the heart to ruin so many lives for their own entertainment? clearly there was such a person or else their friends would be with them today.
“shouto.. where did you find these?” deku asks while he reaches for the second volume. the half n’ half hero gives them both the name of the bookstore and the cross streets. they’d need to get more heroes behind this case before they do anything rash like storming the bookstore without evidence.
their group of three soon grew and the case was active again as the ‘characters’ matched perfectly with other individuals that had gone missing around the same time period. it seemed that they were continuously contacting investigators on a global scale to reopen cases that were cold so long ago.
soon weeks turn to months and slowly they were getting more volumes released to the public. at least to the public only 22 volumes were available, but the heroes were certain there were more behind closed doors.
with the help of underground heroes, who volunteered to go undercover, they were able to get bits of information as to where the old bookstore keeper was getting his hands on such a rare and unique manga.
“his son? the fucking author is his son?” the conference room filled with heroes listening in on the report made by the undercover hero went silent. bakugo was fuming to say the least. well, wasn’t this a twist? the bastard was right under their noses the whole time.
“kacchan, will you let them finish their report?” deku side glanced him to which bakugo grunted in return. deku nods to the hero to continue. “he says that just a couple of days ago his son was down to the last panel and should be done any day now. all that’s left for it to be officially complete is to bind the pages to the book cover. no word yet on when that volume will be released.”
bakugo scoffs, “why wait for him to release it? as soon as we find out that he binds that shit all together, we take his ass down and take the rest of the volumes with us! we need to start figuring out how to get them all back instead of playing this waiting game he’s got us in!”
“rushing in won’t do us any good when we aren’t aware of how his quirk works. we need to take precautions so that we have an advantage. who knows, maybe binding the pages to the cover solidifies the storyline.” ingenium uttered as he collected the report from the undercover hero. many hummed in agreement and it didn’t help now that bakugo felt singled out.
“we understand the urgency, but we just can’t risk getting caught.” uravity adds as she assisted ingenium, “i can’t imagine the kind of situation he’d put us in for finding out. we don’t want to end up like..” her brows furrowed as she glanced down at a page filled with panels from the battle with the beast titan. “bakugo, i’m sure you understand our point of view and we understand yours, so please hold on.”
he takes a look at the panels, stomach churning at the thought that it could be them next if they weren’t careful. but the idea that he’d have to sit and wait still doesn’t sit right with him. “alright, a weeks time and then we head in. i don’t wanna hear that it’s too early, that’s all i’m willing to wait for.”
“so it’s agreed, we wait no more than a we-” the conference room door opened with a resounding bang, “deku, sir!” deku’s secretary, azumane, rushed in with his fist clutching a phone to his ear. “i’ve just gotten word from detective tsukauchi, he wants shoto, dynamite and you to head to the Narita Medical center immediately! he’s also advised for the others to commence the search warrant on isayama hajime.”
their reactions were to immediately make their way to the double doors, all but one. “kacchan, there’s no time for hesitation here. let’s go!” hesitation wasn’t a word that bakugo wanted to be associated with, not now or ever. of course, he wanted to be there to capture the man who created this mess and bring him to justice. though the thought that he’d be one of the first to see those students back was far more tempting.
he’s waited long enough to see that pretty smile that l/n used to give him. with a small sigh of relief, finally approaching deku who had waited by the double doors of the conference room. “yeah, yeah, i’m coming, don’t get ya panties in a twist!”
maybe, just maybe, things were finally looking up for him.
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Text
Vhekadla
Vhekadla : Sandy 
Pairing: Mando x mirialan!reader 
Word count: 4.782
Warnings: Exile, reader not good with kids, mild swearing, slight angst, self-medication (needles (once)) 
Summary: Peli needs components for the failing vaporator in Hangar-2, you are meant to go the moisture farm to get them. But a renown bounty hunter lands in Hangar-3.  
A/N:  Some references to the OG trilogy and the following one. Can’t wait to see how many you find. Let me know. 
I tried not to use any gender for reader (I’m still learning about it) Text in italic = reader’s internal thoughts English is not my native language, I’m trying to get better at it, please be indulgent. 
It was fun to reconnect with the lovely Star Wars nerd in me. 
“A Mirialan would place a unique, often geometrically repeated tattoo on their face and hands to signify that they had completed a certain test or task, or achieved sufficient aptitude for a certain skill. The number of tattoos would thus often act as a good indicator of how mature and/or skilled a Mirialan was.”
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You heard Peli calling out from the hangar, jumping down the reactor you were working on, you step on hangar 3′s threshold. Glancing through your fingers’ shielding the sun, as the pre-Imp beat up vessel lands in Hangar 3. You rolled down your sleeves as Peli look back at you.
“He doesn’t really like droids, so you’ll have to step-in.” stopping next to her you nodded, readjusting your tool belt.
Working for Peli you thought you'd seen everything in terms of species. Until the vessel's ramp lower down with a hiss, a shiny Mandalorian walking out.
Your eyes went to Peli and the approaching bounty hunter as she made her way to him grinning, awaiting for him to give her something. The tall, beskar clad individual gave a small green creature to Peli whom started to coo at it. Weird.
“Glad you decided to keep him.” She waved a finger your way giving you the go-to.
Treading to the gunship, the T shape visor of the Mandalorian followed your form, you didn’t pay much attention to it, hunters could be precious about their engines.
Plugging your datapad in the cargo bay panel you ran a quick diagnostic, looking around the ship while waiting, the hull was oddly neat you noted. The Datapad biped loudly, detailing the ships problems. This old thing was still flying, how, who knew.
“What’s with the Mirialan?"
“What can I tell? I’m going soft! Coz of your womp rat for sure.” He said nothing waiting for her to continue
“They needed the job, no questions ask. But don’t ask about the tattoos, they can be moody,”
“I heard that,” you strolled down the left telescopic gate, heading for the front repulsorlfits.
Why were they talking about you? Do they know each other much? Why a bounty hunter was carrying a child-like thing.
Stepping into the cockpit, you refrained on sitting on the pilot seat, you always felt that pilot seats were as intimate as beds. The Datapad ran a new diag, you eye the control panel, tilting your head seeing something was missing.
The Mandalorian stood tall before Peli “I have things to do!”
Peli waved him off “Yeaah go hunt, we’ll fix your ship in the meantime,”
After a few hours, drenched in sweat and sticky black goo on your hands you finally ease yourself in the cockpit “That should be good, punch it!” you yelled to the 3 pit-droids outside. After hearing the droids tripped on each other, they activated the engine, launching the hyperdrive for a last test.
The Mandalorian made his way back in the hangar just in time to see you hopping down the cargo ladder, sweeping your greasy hands on your overalls.
He couldn’t help but noticed the tattoos showing at your wrists as your sleeves had rolled up.
“This is not going to be a recurrent thing.” You heard the Mandalorian say, clearly annoyed. Approaching them, you could feel the Mandalorian was tense, Peli took the datapad you handed her, you tried your best no to stare at the broad shoulders at your right.
Finally noticing him, and his T-visor staring at your wrists, you swiftly turned around and brushed the sleeves back down; “She’s up to fly. The hyperdrive is as brain new, we made a few check-ups on the engines since they were coughing a bit,” you rounded a crate, looking back at him, your sleeves now attached to your fingers, “and the lights are back on!” you index pointed to the lamp on the ceiling.
_
“You’ll want a price cut, as I can see here,”
You glanced at the visor for a second, what did Peli ask him to do? “Fine,” he sighed.
“Go to the moisture farm and get my parts,” she patted at his pauldron, “you’ll be his guide.“ you were so engrossed in Peli’s friendliness with the bounty huinter that it didn’t click immediatly. Until it did. 
“Hold on, what?” voice rising a notch “I told you I’d go,.. alone!” you argued
“With all the recent things happening in this forsaken desert, I’d rather not send you alone.”
Stepping closer to Peli, your back to the Mandalorian, you stared at her, she stared back, not having it. She knew you could take down a Gamorrean if needed.
“Boss, …”
“For Force’s sake don’t argue with me,” She shooed you away, you knew she wouldn’t let go.
“You still have that speeder bike?” his modulated voice rang in your back as you made your way to the fresher to clean yourself up.
Peli snarled  “I’m gonna start renting it.” 
                                               **
Waiting near the speeder bike, Peli handed you the credits to pay for the binary brain unit and humidity sensor, she needed it for the vaporator in H-2. The moisture farm you were heading to had the parts since they owned the same vaporators.
“You can trust him,” she nudged her jaw to the approaching Mandalorian.
“I’ll be the judge of that,” 
“He’s like family, call him Mando,” you rolled your eyes at her teasing tone. Peli wouldn’t leave the city walls since the Empire fell, so obviously it became your task to get the parts or hardware from out of the walls. Before that she’d lost a few droids in the desert. 
The Mandalorian rounded the speeder, securing a bag on the right side, a green little head popped out of it.
“I don’t think ‘it’ should come, if we encounter any bandits or raiders.”
The thing looked at the his keeper “Don’t worry about that, he’s seen worse.”
You turned to Peli, eyes widenned and flailing hands. She shrugged her famous grin on. Head lolling back and squeezing your eyes shut you let out a sigh then swiveled to him. “I drive, you shoot?” you ask adjusting your scarf around your mouth and nose.
“What?” he genuinely asked. Shaking your head amused you nod your head to the main seat for him to take. It'll be easier to hold him than him hold you.
Straddling the speeder you felt tiny behind him, the beskar was cold even under the twins suns, a gurgle took your attention off the reflecting beskar in front of you. Wrinkled critter.
Keeping a grip on Mando’s side you check the Holo map as the speeder bike hovered at its fastest speed. Gesturing at Mando to indicate the path, the moisture farm would be visible in a few visvia. A glare caught your eye a second too late, you flew from the speeder, crashing hard against the burning sand. Between your grunts and those of the Mandalorian you heard Tusken Raiders' howls.
Groaning you hold your ribs rolling on your good side “Freaking dehydrated Raiders!” The little green being was confused a meter from you, sadly sat on the sand. “Mando, your .. kid,” his broad shadow came into view, soon scooping the child.
Finger at the trigger you look up at the cliffs “Thought you were friends with them!” 
The Mandalorian was trying to salvage the speeder bike while you looked at the map for a safer and faster path, still eyeing the cliffs now and then. “Don’t bother, engine’s burnt.” Greeny made a worried sound.  
“The tuskens, they are the shoot first, ask question later kind of people,” he posted himself on your right, you glanced at him stealthily. Even without seeing his face, his demeanour showed he was pissed off.
“You both have something in common,” you sheath your blaster in the small of the back holster.
“What?” you sensed it took it the wrong way, so quickly clarified “Showing skin is not allowed,”
“Just as your not allowed to show your tattoos!” he riled back.
Your head jerked back, you were not expecting the backlash. You stalked past him, “We should go, the farm ain’t far!” putting as much distance between you and the bounty hunter. 
The Mandalorian regretted his words as soon as they came out. He surely was the last one to have a say about others’ customs and beliefs. Your behavior somehow disarmed him, he didn't know how to act anymore.
                                            **
The suns were getting low in your back, you thank the maker your body was acclimated for dry lands. The hair at your nape rose in a instant, you looked back at the horizon standstill for a few seconds.
"We must take shelter," you whispered. The green critter tilted his head to you followed by his Mandalorian whom picked up your words through his enhanced helmet.
"Sandstorm!" you ran past him, heading for the rocks ahead.
Pulling your large scarf around your face, the Mandalorian was hot on your tail, you realized you wouldn’t like to be one of his bounty, his impressive broadness and the heavy beskar made you shivered. Sliding between two big rocks, you fumbled with your water jug, quickly wetting your scarf around your mouth. The Mandalorian soon joined you with a distorted groan, the baby oddly excitied about the run out was babbling.
"Here," you wet a rag you kept in your rucksack handing it to to him. "It’ll need it," taking the rag from your hand he gently folded it and wrapped the child’s mouth and pointy ears. A gust of hard wind and sand hit the rocks, the light disappearing instantly you found yourself enveloped in a dusty copper shadow. Clenching your eyes shut, your hands immediately went to the child's eyes. You felt his little hands holding onto yours. It’s not a game you thought. The sand was hard on the few uncovered patches of skin on your face, but it soon stopped. You could still hear the wind, the sand rattling the rocks but you couldn't feel it anymore. Opening your eyes carefully, your head jerked back. Beskar. The T visor of his helmet was staring at you. Looking up you saw his arm holding his cape around you three. Your hand unconsciously slowly slipped from the child's eyes. Your reflection was staring at you with wide eyes, its closeness made you uneasy yet not unwelcomed, as the kid was still holding your fingers, this one whined.
“It won’t take long,” Mando spoke, his head dropping to the green child. Adverting your eyes from his visor you scolded yourself, and your increasing heartbeat. 
His eyes were trained on your geometrical tattoos adorning your delicate face, he didn’t expect to lost himself in your eyes as you opened them. His gut twisted when you moved back with a start.
Few minutes later you were dusting sands from your hair and clothes “We should be at the farm in a bit,”
He nodded "I hope they have a speeder to lend us there,”
That yes, coz I won't make it back by walking. I'm no bantha
Both of you let out a relieved sigh when the farm appeared in the horizon. Bhindi Kayle welcomed you in the abode, the farm was practically empty, all the workers were home or in town, only an old man sat at the far end of a bench. Bhindi Kayle was an old aquaintance of Peli, he cut you off as soon as you started talking, he stood before you oddly trying to assert a sort of dominance, he’d never been like that. 
 "Yeah Peli send us a hologram earlier this week,” Mando's chest heaved as soon as the farmer interrupted you. “Didn't expect a Mandalorian to work for her,"
Aaah, a men’s ego.
The kid babbled a confused note, "I'm not working for Motto," Mando stated, galled.
"The Mandalorian is ... here for protection, somehow." The child looked at you from the satchel on Mando's hip. 
The old man rumbled from the corner, "A mirialan, a Mandalorian and a ... whatever that is ... roaming around Tatooine, what a sight." 
"Ah don't listen to him, he lost his mind since the Lars’ farm got burned down,” Bhindi leaned in whispering ”inhaled too much smoke while trying to raid the place."
Negotiating the parts’ price was not in the deal but knowing Peli wasn’t here, Bhindi tried. Yeah tried, not for nothing Peli Motto took you in, you were as stubborn as a falumpaset, gosh you missed Naboo.
"Do you have a speeder?” Mando asked his tone becoming a bit hesitant “Ours ... blown off on the way," your refrained a smirk.
 "Well, we have swoops but you'll be back to Peli in days at that speed." You followed him through the pit to the garage. Eyes skimming the messy place, looked like a junkyard, the green kid was touching everything, you lose your footing on a piece of scrap while looking at it, firm gloved hands propped you up by the shoulders without a word. Embarrassment filed you as Mando’s hands left your shoulders with hesitation.
"Are those... pieces of a Bantha-II cargo skiff?" You stepped onto the old railing, trying to distract yourself from the burning feel of his touch. "Where did you get that?"
 "That old rusty thing? We found it a few years back. The Hutts might have abandoned it, thankfully for us the Jawas were late on this one." Bhindi rummaged through a bunch of metal "We keep some engines we found for the parts, just in case. Ah!"
He proudly showed his finding. You heard the Mandalorian groaned behind you.
"Might be cramp on it with the two of you, but it can do."
Mando was not amused "A skimboard?" his hands reached his hips, he stood there staring at Bhindi. Stepping down the railing, a light smile spread on your lips. 
"I'm good with it," you grabbed the board "you fly, I use the skimboard," his bucket head turned to you, the heavy silence coming from the Beskar clad man had Bhindi lose his tough demeanour, but had you amused.
"Hum, I can probably find an old speeder bike," The Mandalorian nodded at the farmer. 
Inspecting the slick metal, your hand dusted off the sand of off it "How much for it?"
"25 alliance credits will do," he shrugged.  "Deal," Bhindi hurried away in the back of the garage.
“I’ll be back in a minute,”stepping out the junkyard, you head for the hydroponic garden. 
The sand had crawled under your layers, it soon became itchy and abrasive. Stripping down your top layers, you stayed in your dark undershirt. Vigorously dusting off your copper colored top and black hood, the dusts particles shining under the sun rays. Cupping water in your hands, your let the fresh water ran down your tattooed arms. Cold water on your face never felt so good, even after hours working on a spaceship it wasn’t as satisfying.
“Khayle found us a landspeeder” you gasped at his voice, holding your arms around you and turning your back to him; Mando became even more silent than usual. The tattoos on your arms and body were not to be seen by everyone, it wasn’t as strict as Mandalorian’s creed or the Tuskens but still, you were meant to choose the few who would see them. The one on your face were your achievement, your proudness, you could show them. But those on your body were more personal, promises to your species, and to yourself. Since the farm was empty you thought it would be safe to undress, apparently not.
Mando paused, he wasn’t expecting that, seeing the tattoos on your wrists earlier he thought that was it but seeing your inked arms and shoulders blades he felt pulled by curiosity but as soon as he saw you flinched and tried to hide your arms, he turned away. 
He walked out, not saying a word, thinking about what he said earlier. Peli did warn him. Feeling your rushed breathing haven out, and the thundering sound of your bloodstream into your ears fading you reached for your copper long sleeve top. As you tried to snatch it you felt a resistance, the child, coming to you his little claws up to touch your arms. Big dark eyes staring at you, oddly similar to the dark visor of his keeper. Feeling that pull deep inside, you frowned putting your hood on and grabbing the child, holding it bunglingly, he kept looking at you.
“You forgot something.” You gently shoved him the child, then rounded the landspeeder.
Bhindi casually leaned on the abode “You should stay for the night, Raiders thrive at night.”
Mando watched you sit at the driver’s seat, your hood hiding your expression. “We’ll be fine,” he answered not sparing a glance at Bhindi. The child fell asleep an hour after leaving the moisture farm that’s when Mando decided to talk. 
“If I’d known ...” you stayed silent “Did I endanger your faith or beliefs?” he asked seriously concerned.
“Mirialans, we …” you scoffed “I’ll be fine.”
Something in his tone changed “I’m sorry, it wasn’t done on purpose.” The child’s ears settled down in a snore; it was as he was feeling his keeper’s trouble even through his sleep.
“Something happened, when I was not even an idea.” you felt compelled to tell the story behind the tattoos since he saw most of them. “My ancestor was part of the Senate, she believed in a way of life, now long forgotten. She fought for it but soon realized it was wrong, she was never meant to fight, she was meant to keep the peace. Her loyalty faded, she did bad things ... I’m bond to her in some ways I can’t explain.”
The Mandalorian stayed silent, you were used to it at this point. 
“The old Galactic Senate banished her. No one remembers Bariss Offee now, she's been long gone. But I do.”
“The old Galactic Senate...” Mando clenched his fist “I heard about it,”
“Some of my tattoos are meant to heal her soul through me. After her fall, my family scattered, we were forbidden to talk about her, we were forced to strip ourselves from our knowledge. I was young, my parents flew us to another galaxy, there we live like humans. But my parents kept one of our custom, the tattoos.” you shrugged, even Peli didn’t know about all this, she knew about your exile but that’s all.
“I…I don’t know if I can say this and my apologize if it’s misplaced but you .. uhm” Mando asked himself why he was so stressed about telling you his honest feel about it “..they are ..pretty,” the repulsorlift the only sound perceptible. That wasn’t the reaction you were expecting, especially coming from the renown bounty hunter, eyes leaving the road you stared at him confused but somehow relieved, your hood flew back reveling your face to him.
 A tuskens battle cry made you break, standing up on your seat, immediately reaching for your blaster and glowrod. 
“Hold on,” he posed the sleeping child on your seat, getting down.
“Mando, they shoot us once, I’m not taking any chance,”
“I’ll talk to them,” he stated calmly “lower your blaster and stay close,”
You inhaled loudly, putting away your weapon. Emerging from the dark, tall figures soon surrounded you. The deep grunt coming out the helmet at your side startled you, his gestures and groans had the attention of the faceless Raiders. The silence on their part didn’t do much to ease your worry until they answered, though you couldn’t understand, the stance of your companion made you feel safe.
“They’re saying we should camp out, another tribe, the one who shot us is ahead of us,”
“Camp out, with them?” you whispered as if they could understand you “I heard things about them,”
“Not everything you hear is true,” Mando’s visor was trained on your hesitating features. Well you didn’t have much of a choice, you weren’t going to leave without him and the green thing.
“You take the first watch,” you gathered your backpack, he nodded at you, preceding you.
The kid now awaken, was nestled between his keeper’s feet, staring at the fire in front of him. It might have felt you staring because his little ears perked up and he soon waddled to you. The kid kept trying to hold you or touch your hand.
"Is it always like that? Clingy?" You poked the child’s forehead making him wobble back.
Mando tilted his head with a sigh, silently asking if your gesture was really necessary.
"Not really," He reached for the child but this latter whined, settling when he grabbed your index’ first phalanx.
"You were saying!?" You sighed as the kid looks like he was concentrating on your finger. As he kept doing that you felt that pull again, deep inside of you, an inner energy you usually only could feel during your ancestor’s vision. It scared you, snatching your finger from the kid, you look at the big eyes now staring at you. "What are you!"
“Easy,” Mando ushered the kid back to him “He has powers, I should have warned you,”
“What kind of power?”
“He can move things with his mind or something similar” your mind processed the news, “I’ve been quested to bring him back to his kind,"
The child climbed your feet to get closer, your lips turned down in an uneasy grimace, you weren't exactly gifted with children, if it was one though. Clingy beings, loud and stinky, not your thing.
The Mandalorian kept an eye on you without your knowledge, he'd never seen anyone be so hesitant with the child before.
Mando talked with the Tuskens while you ate, he sometimes translated for you in case you were interested in their conversation.
....
"You are missing a piece on the turbines’ launch lever by the way, want another one!?" You asked him sleepily, "That won't be necessary," he chuckled and it caught you off guard but you said nothing.
A young tusken handed you a fur cloth, hesitantly grabbing it you eyed Mando, he made a gesture to the raider. 
"I take the first watch," even with his vocoder you could hear the grin.
Waking up in a sweat you observed your surroundings. A bantha was snoring loudly next to a pack of sleeping tuskens. A soft snore not far from you got your attention. The child was tucked on Mando's side, his ears heaving with his breaths.
The fire reflecting on the beskar mesmerized you, it was like Mando's was made of fire. Was he sleeping? 
“You’re okay?”
“My ribs hurts, I’m cold, but I’m managing.” you stood up, stepping closer to the fire. “Take some rest, it’s my shift.” 
“Here,” you turned around just in time to caught the e-bacta shot, Mando closed his belt pocket and crossed his arms, leaning on a rucksack, ready to rest.  
“Thanks..” you stared at his calm composure, forgetting he could still be looking at you behind that visor. 
Your gaze on him got him agitated, he tried his best to rest his eyes but he couldn’t detached his from yours, somehow you always manage to made eye-contact, most people didn’t even dare look straight at him. He stayed alert as you went to the land speeder, lifting your top enough to reach your bruised flank, he saw you brace yourself for the shot. 
1,2 “Hmmm!!!” you muffled your groan in your elbow as the three needles deeped in your flesh, youknew that in a few minutes you’ll be alright but maker it hurt. 
The suns getting up, you were seated on the land speeder’s hood watching the twins made their entry, I’ll never get tired of this. 
“We’re good to go, the other tribe moved north,” Mando set the child on the hood next to you to thanks the Tuskens. 
The child lifted his head to you, silently staring, suddenly rushing to you head bumping your hip “ "Oof!” he angrily cuddled your side “Mando, what’s going on with it?” 
“Hey, hey kid, no!” he cradled him into his arms “what did you do?”
“Nothing!” you jumped down the hood “It slammed into me,”
“He never acts like that, there’s something with you,” Mando stated
“Oh maker come on Mando,” your voice tightened “I’m a nobody, an exile mirialan, I’m no Jedi like my ancestor!” you realised as soon as you said it, screwing your eyes shut. 
“Your ancestor was a Jedi?”he stepped forward, his demeanour now threatening but you stood your ground. “And you’re telling me now?”
“Mando I, ... I’m not sure about it, I don’t even understand the visions I have, that’s why I didn’t say anything.” 
“We should go!” he shut himself, the child whined against his keeper’s chest. 
The ride back to Peli was excruciating, Mando didn’t talk to you or ease the kid’s fuss. The three of you made it back to Peli without issues. 
She was about to make one of her famous punchline but she saw your concerned face as you passed by her deposing the vaporator’s pieces on her desk. 
Peli planted herself before him “What did you do?” he sighed.
Mando watched as the door hiss closed behind you. 
“How much do you know about them?” 
“What’d you do!?” Peli insisted before answering his question. As stubborn as you he thought. He related the conversation, he’d never seen Peli so mad.
The soft knock on your door told you it wasn't Peli. It opened on your command.
“We need to talk,” Mando stepped-in
“Oh now you want to talk!” you threw a wrench in your tool box “We had a full ride for that.” 
“You lied to me!” he pointed his finger to the ground 
“I didn’t LIE to you! I just ..didn’t tell you all of it. Jedis and Mandalorians are not exactly friends for all I know,”
“The child might be a Jedi and you didn’t care to tell me you knew about he’s people.” the tiny bedroom was crowded with his presence, deep inside behind the anger lied a fluttering feeling when he entered your space.
“My ancestor had that kind of power, but I don’t know shit about it, I told you if you were to even listen!” tears at the brim at your eyes remembering your parents’ tale about their exile, you inhaled trying to stay focused.
“I’ve listened,” he regained his neutral tone “if you are like your ancestor then maybe you have that power in you, that’s why the child is reaching out to you, he might feel it,” 
you scoffed “I’m a mecha not a Jedi,” the child made you jumped when he touched your hand, he had climbed the comforter hanging from your cot.
“Mando, I’d … never mean to hide things from you, I’m just..scared.” You let the child hold your finger “An unknown powerful energy in me, how would you react! Even if I’d want to know, I don’t even know where to start.”
He nodded leaving your cramped bedroom with the child. Few minutes later Peli called out, sighing you drag your feet to her desk.
“What is it that you want Motto?” you taunted but the teasing voice died seeing Mando on the other side of her seat. 
“I’ve been quested to bring him to the jedi.” his visor on you, knitted your brows you wait for his speech. “I could use a mecha on board, one that needs answer of some sorts,” his grave voice resonated in your ears, he faced Peli while saying it. She sighed knowingly; her face torned with doubts.
“I can’t, Peli you need me and I ..” 
“Kid, I’ve seen you distraught after your visions, it’s getting worse,” Peli sighed “Well, I’m not saying losing my best mecha is ideal,” you tried your best to keep the feelings at bay  “…but go if you have to, I’ll managed” she patted you shoulder, herself containing her sniffles.
“Take care of this piece of junk,” she snorted making you laugh.
“I’ll come back,”
“Don’t you dare, you're young, get out of this desolate place. Go get the galaxy,”
Smiling at her you hugged her tight “Oh come on, come on” she shooed you away, striding to your room to pack, you didn’t see her made eyed contact with Mando’s visor, a silent plead to keep you safe, he nodded. 
Stepping in the cockpit, you sat on the passenger seat at his right. The green being was on your right eyeing you, you suprised yourself smiling at him. Mando came in and the kid starts to shift in his pod, you watched Mando as he took something on the control panel and swivelled to the baby. Thlatter reached out, his keeper letting a shiny metal ball fall into his little claw.
“That’s…” you said out loud. Your eyes darted to the turbines launcher’s lever. Mando finally turned to you and shrugged tilting his helmet.
“A mirialan, a Mandalorian and a Jedi ... what a sight.” 
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vancafreader · 3 years
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Fine Art Comics of Canada: Sixties to Seventies - Heart of London, Snore & More by Robert Dayton
Part One: The Heart Of London
There was a time where artists were making vast ripples away from Toronto and other outsized hubs. London, Ontario was such a place, all eyes were on it in the late 60’s and not Toronto. The Heart Of London comic book from 1968 was actually an exhibition catalog, an overview of the art that was happening there at the time. Organised by The National Gallery of Canada, this exhibition traveled from London to Toronto, Kingston, Edmonton, Victoria, Charlottetown and, of course, The National Gallery H.Q. itself in Ottawa.
This catalog/comic book consisted of fumetti, comics done using photos for the images. Fumetti was most prominently used in the 60’s by Harvey Kurtzman in Help and Playboy, prolifically in numerous Mexican comic book melodramas, and in Italian comics featuring the masked master criminal Satanik. Heart Of London’s particular fumetti is further stylized by heavily contrasted processing causing colours so bright that they make everything heightened artifice, buzzing as if emanating from a higher plane of being.
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Cover of the Heart Of London catalogue
The Heart of London logo in Pepto-Bismol pink is rendered somewhere between Archie and underground comix titles. Above it, The Comics Code of Authority symbol -a comic book mainstay of the day implying that the work is of safe moral quality- has been altered to “National Gallery of Canada”, the institution that made this comic book and exhibition happen. The cover features what appears to be London public workers, perhaps? These men in yellow hard hats casually stand in front of a store with a Coca-Cola logo also coloured Pepto-Bismol pink, Pop Art style, at the city’s main intersection in what very well may be the heart of London.
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The comic opens with a quote placed above a looming Brutalist parking lot, huddling various small businesses below it. This quote contains the phrase “heart of London” but it is rather self-deprecatingly not about London, Ontario but London, England in World War One. Sharing a name with London, England has often made this Ontario city the butt of many a joke, ie. “I live in London… (long pause) Ontario” with its population being just over 200,000 in 1968. Named in 1793 by Lord Simcoe, Upper Canada’s first Lieutenant-Governor known for starting the abolition of slavery, he was also fervently British, his vision for Canada was for it to be like England which he looooved, desperately (but stiffly) wanting this particular London to become Ontario’s capital. Alas, Toronto was chosen instead. Related, always related to everything: the term “cosmic consciousness”, the higher state of consciousness, was coined in London in 1872 by Richard Bucke, a psychiatrist and head of The Asylum For The Insane, after he received a blinding vision, illuminating him. Besides being active in asylum reform, Bucke was heavily involved in the arts -the vision occurred after an evening spent reading Romantic poetry as well as poems by Walt Whitman, who he later befriended. Yes, London, Ontario is an eccentric place.
The artists involved in the Heart Of London show were part of what was known as “London Regionalism”, a loose-knit movement of artists who were adamant about residing in London, away from Toronto or New York. Artist Greg Curnoe helped establish some of the very first artist-run centres there. He was an early member and huge proponent of CARFAC, a Canadian organisation that fights for artists to get paid and paid fairly for their work. CARFAC was founded in London by Heart Of London artists Jack Chambers and Tony Urquhart -along with Kim Ondaatje.
Besides Curnoe, Chambers, and Urquhart, the eleven artists in Heart Of London included John Boyle, Bev Kelly, Murray Favro, Ron Martin, David Rabinowitch, Royden Rabinowitch, Walter Redinger, and Ed Zelenak. They are all profiled in fumetti form talking about their practice through speech balloons and captions, along with quick biographical details. Many of these artists were known for their inventiveness, they were influenced by a variety of subject matter -including comic art- without falsely delineating these influences into false boxes of high or low art. They didn’t just make work in the visual art field either. Along with a Hart Of London work-on-paper, Chambers made an experimental film with the same name in 1970. This film intensely shows brutal shots of an abattoir in Spain interspersed with London scenes; it has been described by Stan Brakhage as “one of the greatest films ever made.”  Both Curnoe’s Heart Of London painting from 1967 and Jack Chambers’ 1968 work-on-paper Hart Of London are in the show.
Noted curator and historian Judith Rodger told me that Curnoe’s Heart Of London piece depicts The Forks Of the Thames downtown, “arguably the heart of London” near many of the artists’ studios with Greg’s studio as the main hub or heart of it all. As for the idea of a comic book catalog, it was a mystery until Rodger guided me to Katie Cholette’s PhD thesis Memory and Mythmaking: the role of autobiography in the works of Jack Chambers and Greg Curnoe which states that it was the idea of William Bragg, assistant to the director of The National Gallery’s extension services. Cholette’s paper quotes Bragg from the Sept 29, 1968 New York Times’ Arts Notes column, “…The idea was to make a kind of scrapbook, to talk as a group, not individuals. Their work is kind of echoed by the comics—it’s really their bag […] Everyone likes to read comics once in a while, anyway.” Due to its uniqueness, the catalog garnered a lot of press for the show. Beverley Lambert (Bev Kelly in the show) says, “I think we all thought it was pretty neat and it was funny. It got people’s attention.”
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When I talked to artist John Boyle about this comic book catalog, he said right away, “It’s too bad that Greg Curnoe isn’t with us anymore, because he was really interested in comic books. And he always did comic book or comic-like drawings from the time he was a little kid.” In the book Greg Curnoe Life And Work, author Judith Rodger’s description of his 1963 painting Myself Walking North In the Tweed Coat could be ascribed to many of his works. “The flat, vivid colours; schematic outlines; and text all come from his love of the comic book.” As well as the inclusion of the name of the newspaper strip Mary Worth in the piece. Another colourful painting casually inserts Dick Tracy into the frame as a representative of one of his interests. Curnoe’s series of cut-out collages were often shaped into cartoony and anthropomorphic forms.
Curated by Pierre Théberge at The National Gallery, Boyle readily notes, “Both Curnoe and Chambers talked up all the other artists who were around in London, and ended up persuading Théberge to have a group show to get a sense of the whole London art scene.”
The comic book itself doesn’t give William Bragg’s name at all, nada. The designer is credited: Roger Duhamel, FRSC, Queen’s Printer and Controller of Stationery, a federal government official, as well as the design firm: Eccleston + Glossop International. All of the photos, however, were done by the late Don Vincent, of whom Boyle says, “He was a friend of ours, of all of us. And a really terrific photographer. And he documented the whole London scene as it unfolded taking photographs all the time of everybody in this show and just of London, his whole life was photography.” Vincent’s work also appeared in 20 Cent Magazine, a delightfully scrappy local art magazine started in the mid-60’s with many of the people in the show, including Boyle and Curnoe, contributing writings and drawings. 20 Cent Magazine sold for 25 cents, ha! Vincent also photographed The Nihilist Spasm Band who are regarded as the first noise-rock band; this amazing, mind-blowing, intense and milk-spurtingly funny act was founded by the late Greg Curnoe, with Boyle and Favro (playing unique guitars that he builds himself) as still very active members over fifty years later. They are unique cultural ambassadors bringing such songs as “No Canada” to the world, having performed in Japan and in Vancouver at The Western Front with poet George Bowering guesting on guitar, and have had a documentary made about them by the late noise artist Zev Asher.
In one of Heart Of London’s comic book panels about Boyle an early issue of the four color MAD sneaks its way in. I asked him if he read MAD, “Yeah. Although that is from the designer. I read MAD, although not madly.”
A very young Boyle states in one of his panels, “The day I can truly defile myself in public, I will have accomplished everything, and I will no longer have a need to paint.” Reflecting today he says, “I still think that actually, and I think I may have succeeded. Because I do still have the need to paint. But I don’t have the need to show it anymore, or to get applause or approval from anyone. And I don’t know how that arose in me. But I kind of had a fair amount of attention and approval and acceptance and shows in fancy places and meeting important people and pleasing art administrators. And I kind of reached the conclusion that most of them aren’t worth pleasing and their opinion was not as good or not as important as the opinions of other people that I happen to know. And I thought they made a lot of mistakes and people that they chose to support. And also, their approval was very fickle. They were very fickle about it because as soon as fashions would change, their eyes were directed elsewhere and the people they thought were geniuses today were no longer geniuses tomorrow. I did kind of lose my enthusiasm for the art world, but not for painting. So, I was mistaken.”
The final pages of this catalog feature a few reproductions of pieces from the show itself, including Bev Kelly’s window paintings which, with its window panels, adapt quite easily to the comic book form, comparable to an ornate and mysterious painted comic page. The layout, however, was a bit fast and loose with one of her works being printed sideways. In her fumetti section she says, “These windows aren’t ‘real’ windows, they are still paintings. They don’t have sashes and you can’t see through them. A real window is to look through, these are to look at.” Painted on canvas, the window pieces used lumber to make the frames of the paintings, carved to look like the ribbed mouldings of window frames.
Bev Kelly was the sole woman in the show and when I asked her about this she said, “I’m very happy that they didn’t concentrate on this issue that I was the only woman. I didn’t want to be known as an artist because I was a woman.” Having recently moved to London from Saskatchewan with her husband, they were warmly welcomed by Curnoe and she would go see The Nihilist Spasm Band play every week at The York Hotel. Her first solo show was at The 20/20 Gallery in London.
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She spent the first two years of her life in Biggar, Saskatchewan where the signs read, “New York Is Big, But This Is Biggar.” Being in London changed her notions of places like New York being the absolute cultural mecca. Beverley says, “There was a really vibrant cultural community there. You know what a regionalist Greg was. He really believed, as a lot of writers do, that you should write about what you know, or you should do your art about what you know, including where you live and so on. And, of course, when I started on the windows that was right out where I was living. The first ones were of my house and then I walked around and took pictures of various houses that I thought looked interesting. When I got a studio in London above one of the businesses downtown I used some of the windows there as inspiration for my works. And then when I went back to Saskatchewan, I was very into that, looking around at what is there where you live. I even got a grant to travel around small-town Saskatchewan and look at the local -in air quotes- ‘folk art’ or untrained artists, let’s say, just painting odd things on their house or their property or whatever. So, I went and I did interviews, took pictures of them, and I imagine I must have produced some kind of a report on it because I probably had to for my grant. So that led me into being more observant and looking more at where it’s from and what is around you and that you don’t have to go to some huge, big place to find art.”
Bev Kelly was her married name and she returned to using her original name, Beverley Lambert in the 1970’s. Lambert did a series of three large lithographs for International Women’s Year in 1975 on women’s issues dealing with real news stories that happened on the prairies. Many of these prints were donated to many women’s centres across the country. She has also worked in clay doing an entire main street based on the fictional Saskatchewan town in the humour book Sarah Binks by Paul Hiebert. Beverley Lambert currently resides in St. John’s, Newfoundland where she makes art and is active as a conservator.
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Flip the comic over and it is the same but in either French or English depending on where you first started reading!
Boyle comments, “Last night, my wife and I were looking at the Heart of London catalog. She was amazed that this was a National Gallery touring show with a lot of artists who became major artists in the country. And it looked like they were trying to spend as little money as possible by making this skinny little comic book-like thing on newsprint and I think there’s a large measure of truth in that. Because, again, I remember when Greg Curnoe had a big one-man exhibition retrospective at The National Gallery and the catalogue that they did for him was kind of a minimal thing. It was like a paperback book with one colour reproduction and a number of inferior black and white reproductions and basically a list of artworks in the show. And in the same year, The National Gallery did a big one-man exhibition of Donald Judd, the American sculptor, and his catalogue was a huge coffee table book that weighed about 15 pounds and was three inches thick and loaded with colour from beginning to end. And that just, I think, represented a specifically Canadian problem.” When I mention this to Hairy Who member Art Green he responds, “Well, of course, because they’re trying to impress their betters in New York, so you get a job at The Whitney or The Museum of Modern Art. Canada has been an incubator for museum directors since forever.”
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Hairy Who catalog page by Art Green, courtesy of the artist
This style of catalog for Heart Of London corresponds nicely with The Hairy Who, another such grouping of artists around that time who were part of “The Chicago Imagists.” Their three Chicago art shows starting in the mid-60’s were accompanied by comic books that also doubled as exhibition catalogs. The Hairy Who weren’t very aware of the underground comics scene then just barely getting started, they chose this method out of creative necessity, printing a glossy catalog was cost prohibitive. Green explains, “And the printing was expensive and not very good. And we didn’t want to have a show that was called ‘Six Recent Graduates’ or something unexciting like that. And so, we realised we all liked comics and we all knew how to do colour stripping because we’d taken silk-screening courses, we figured out we could do it. And it was cheap.”
Delineating further, The Hairy Who made playful art inspired by a wide range of neat stuff. The London artists were well aware of The Hairy Who. In fact, The Hairy Who were even going to show in London at The 20/20 Gallery. Boyle notes, “20/20 was kind of a precursor to the art in the so-called artist run centres, most of which aren’t run by artists anymore. But anyway, it was one of the first and it was all sponsored by local people in London. And I don’t think it lasted longer than a couple of years, but it was a terrific gallery while it lasted.” Many of the artists in The Heart Of London show were active in 20/20, which lasted from 1966 to 1971. Greg Curnoe discussed the show with Hairy Who artist Karl Wirsum, who in a letter to Art Green wrote, “Well, if they go ahead and publish a comic book, that would be all right.” Green notes, “He may have thought that the 20/20 Gallery was more well-funded than it probably was. But it was on, we all agreed to do it. We were looking forward to it.” Green himself left Chicago for Canada in 1969. The 1968 Democratic Convention had transpired and as Green puts it, “Everybody was angry at everybody.” He was dissatisfied with his teaching job there as well, so when offered a job at NASCAD, the art school in Halifax, he leaped at it.
Alas, the show didn’t happen. In a letter to Art Green, Curnoe writes, “We had to cancel The Hairy Who show and a lot of us were disappointed.” Boyle notes, “I suspect that it got caught up in the death throes of the gallery. And they would have had to cancel whatever exhibitions they had coming up.”
Green notes that both London and Chicago are far enough away from the more major centres that artists can, “…be free to go their own way because there’s not much at stake partly and nobody’s paying attention. And I remember the first time I had been in London, we were driving on our honeymoon to Halifax where I got the job. And I thought, ‘I’m gonna stop here and get a Canada Dry.’ I’m driving down what’s the main street that runs north south and pulled into a corner store. And I said, ‘Do you have Canada Dry?’ ‘No, but we got America Dry.’  I have never before or since seen a bottle of America Dry. I bought it and it wasn’t as good as Canada Dry. And, and that’s not a dream. I mean, I have never seen it ever again. But that made me say, ‘Wow, this is a weird place.’”
While Green was teaching at NASCAD, Curnoe came for what Green calls, “One of his annual excoriations, if that’s a word, he would rip them up one side down the other in public, for being a Canadian art school with no Canadians teaching, hardly any, and all yanks -and it was true! And so anyway, they would invite him and it was almost like a ritual. He would be in the public, there’d be 400 students there and Greg would just rip the place apart. I had known Greg, I heard about the show and so on, and we got along fine. And afterwards he’d come up to me and say, ‘Well, how did I do?’ ‘Greg, you’re doing great, but you do realise I’m a yank’, but I agreed with him 100%.” Both Curnoe and Green commiserated on how Canadian art was neglected at the school. “If he had been in Chicago, Greg would have been a member of The Hairy Who or maybe started it. But he was more political, he had to be, and Chicago, the politics were so acidic that you wouldn’t have wanted to be to be involved in it, unless you went in full immersion. And we were decidedly unpolitical. Although we all agreed on the politics of it. We were a collective in the sense that we wanted people to collect us.” On this, Art Green is a tad glib, having made art responding to and criticizing Secretary of Defense Robert McNamara. Both Art and Greg would visit with each other in various Canadian cities: Halifax, Vancouver, Toronto. “Nobody appreciated Greg in Toronto, they went out of their way to un-appreciate him. And luckily, they did put a put up a pretty nice retrospective after he was safely gone.”
Of London, Green notes, “I think that for a period of time. I don’t know how long it was maybe a few minutes, maybe a few hours, maybe a few months? Maybe a few years. London, Ontario was most interesting art scene and literary scene in the whole world.”
The propensity for great art still ran in the water there, the stream flowed, there was a continuum and a recognizing of that history. London has some great galleries including Forest City Gallery, founded by Jack Chambers and Greg Curnoe, where The Nihilist Spasm Band plays every Monday night.
In 2013 The London Museum held the group show L.O. Today with artists Jason Mclean, Marc Bell, Jamie Q, Billy Bert Young, Amy Lockhart, Peter Thompson, and James Kirkpatrick. Many of these artists are a part of the Canadian Psychedooolic art comic movement that began in the 1990’s, captured and collected in the book Nog A Dod, edited by former Londoner Marc Bell and released by Conundrum/PictureBox. Much of the work in Nog A Dod occurred in Vancouver with a couple of these London artists relocating there, immersing easily, doing a lot of collaborative drawing and art books with other Vancouver based artists. Yes, ‘Canadian Psychedooolic’ was named after the fact by Bell, but we weren’t thinking of ourselves as a movement or a group at the time. Yet all of these art books had an unfettered comic wildness, funny, and expansively playful. And Nog A Dod got out there, impacting and influencing a lot of artists the world over. Furthering the connective tissue, in 2003, The Western Front in Vancouver put on an art show featuring ‘documents and ephemera’ from musical acts The Nihilist Spasm Band, The All Star Schnauzer Band (a somewhat fake band as mail art project involving Bell, Mclean, and Thompson) and July Fourth Toilet, a Vancouver based group that often involves many Nog A Dod and Nog A Dod related artists, including yours truly occasionally wearing outlandish semi-functional semi-nude costumes specially designed by Jason Mclean. The show was curated by Jonathan Middleton, who is now Executive Director at Art Metropole, a Toronto based artist-run centre dealing primarily in artists’ publications.
Getting back to Greg Curnoe. Released in two parts in 1970, The Great Canadian Sonnet contained numerous images by Curnoe. Described as a “Beaver Little Book”, the format was modeled after the popular Big Little Books, distant cousins to comic books so named for being small, square and thick. Big Little Books were marketed to children and featured popular comic, cartoon, radio and film characters of the day in text-based stories with illustrations on every other page. Some Big Little Books had flip-it cartoons in the top corner so one could make the character move. With its second volume The Great Canadian Sonnet does this as well, stating “See ‘em move – just flip the pages” on the cover and, sure enough, in the corner a spot rolls up a hill-like abstract shape transforming into a medley of human faces.
Written by poet David McFadden, Curnoe riffed off lines in his text creating a great many detailed pen-and-ink drawings for the book with titles that included “Proud Possessor Of Meaningful Pain”, “One that will be Truly Loved by the Prime Minister”, and “The Empty Universe” which featured a drawing of a tin of apple juice and a packet of bird seed -the book’s drawings contained many such absurdist pairings. The Great Canadian Sonnet was published by Coach House Press who were -and still are- known for releasing all manner of experimental works including poetry, prose and beyond. Both volumes together weigh in at over 400 pages, with every other page being a drawing by Curnoe.
Many thanks to Jason Mclean, Marc Bell, and Judith Rodger for their immense help with this piece.
Thanks as well to Art Green for use of his respective artworks.
Part Two: Scraptures, Snore and More coming tomorrow, Friday, August 20!
Robert Dayton
www.robertdayton.com
www.patreon.com/CanadianGlam
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