#incorrect the falcon and the winter soldier
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Kate, Sam, Bucky, and Yelena chilling tgth.
Kate, to Yelena: When are you going to stop calling me by my last name? Is it a Russian thing? Cuz I swear Bucky does it too.
Bucky: It isn't a Russian thing, it's an assassin thing. And I'm not Russian. Just so happen they are often linked together.
Yelena: I'll stop calling you by your last name, Bishop, once you change it to Belova.
Everyone: ……..
Sam: …Smoooottthh…
#avengers#marvel#bucky barnes#incorrect marvel#incorrect avengers#kate x yelena#yelena belova#kate bishop#bishova#sam wilson#sam x bucky#winterfalcon#sambucky#winter soldier#james barnes#incorrect bishova#the falcon#white widow#hawkeye#incorrect bucky barnes#incorrect yelena belova#incorect quote#incorrect kate bishop#incorrect sam wilson
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Y/n: I’ve been dropping him the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response.
Bucky: Wow. He sound stupid.
Y/n : But he's not. He's really smart actually. Just dense.
Bucky: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!”
Y/n : I guess you’re right. Hey James, I love you.
Bucky: See! Just say that!
Sam : [annoyed] for fuck's sake...
Bucky: If that flies over his head then, sorry doll , but he's too dumb for you.
Sam: You’re absolutely right about that!
Y/n : I just can't...
#sebastian stan#bucky x female reader#incorrect quotes#funny#marvel#house of the dragon#sam wilson#bucky barnes x reader#sam wilson x bucky barnes#sam wilson x reader#incorrect the falcon and the winter soldier#the falcon and the winter soldier
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Kate: What did you get Yelena for her birthday?
Y/N: I got her a dog.
Kate: Really? Me too!
Sam: I also got her a dog!
Bucky: Looks like we had the same idea.
Y/N: Scott, please tell me you didn’t get Yelena a dog as well.
Scott: I got her a dog!
[cuts to Yelena surrounded by dogs]
Yelena: THIS IS THE BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!!
#source: tik tok#kate bishop#kate bishop incorrect quotes#hawkeye#yelena belova#yelena belova incorrect quotes#black widow#avengers x reader#sam wilson#sam wilson incorrect quotes#falcon#captain america#bucky barnes#bucky barnes incorrect quotes#winter soldier#scott lang#scott lang incorrect quotes#ant man#marvel incorrect quotes#marvel#avengers#avengers incorrect quotes
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Ah yes… Peter…
Peter, in the lab: Mr stark, are we cooking today or what!
Tony: Peter, we aren’t… in the kitchen?
—-
Peter: Mr. Stark, you’re girly pop!
Tony: … What?
—-
Tony: how are you feeling webs?
Peter, after a battle, in the med bay: Mother trucker dude, that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick!
Tony, concerned: What… does that mean?
Sam, laughing: Watch your profanity!
Steve and Bucky, confused: What the hell?
—-
Tony, his hands busy, handing over a piece of paper: Pete, can you read this to me?
Peter: actually, I never learned how to read.
—-
Natasha, fighting Peter on his homework: If you don’t do your work you’re going to end up at McDonald’s-
Peter: we goin’ to McDonalds if I don’t do my work?
—-
The avengers having a summer party
Tony: Peter what do you have-
Peter: A KNIFE!
Tony: WHAT? NO-
—-
Peter: So I was sitting there, BBQ sauce on my titties…
Tony: Peter you don’t have- what?
@spiderman-is-me
#iron man#peter parker#spiderman#tony stark#irondad and spiderson#marvel#peter parker needs a hug#iron dad#tags are hard#incorrect marvel quotes#natasha romanoff#black widow#blackwidow#sam wilson#falcon#captain falcon#vine quote#vines#gen z#gen z humor#steve rogers needs a hug#steve rogers#captain america#bucky barnes#james buchanan barnes#the winter soldier
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Bucky: I absolutely hate pet names, can’t stand them.
Sam: I somehow don’t believe that.
Y/N walks into the room, looking at Bucky with a big smile.
Y/N: Oh honey, there you are!
Bucky, smiling and blushing: See, I totally can’t stand them.
Sam: Clearly
#source: tumblr#incorrect quotes#marvel incorrect quotes#incorrect marvel quotes#mcu incorrect quotes#bucky barnes incorrect quotes#james bucky barnes#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#Bucky#bucky x reader#bucky x you#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes imagine#winter soldier#sam wilson#sam wilson x reader#the falcon#marvel#marvel x reader#marvel x you#marvel imagine#sebastian stan#anthony mackie
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Some of the Avengers are on a hike Rhodey: It’s beautiful out here. Bruce: And quiet. Sam: Too quiet. Bucky: Did we lose someone? cut to Steve with a bear in a headlock
#marvel#marvel mcu#incorrect quotes#steve rogers#bucky barnes#captain america#steven grant rogers#james buchanan barnes#the winter soldier#stucky#the avengers#bruce banner#incredible hulk#colonel rhodes#james rhodes#rhodey#sam wilson#falcon
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Bucky: Y/N, what does IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean?
Y/N: I don’t know, I love you, talk to you later.
Bucky: Alright, I love you too, I'll ask Sam.
Y/N: Wait- Bucky , no-
#source: ???#incorrect marvel quotes#marvel incorrect quotes#incorrect mcu quotes#bucky barnes#bucky#james bucky barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky x you#bucky x reader#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes comfort#the winter soldier#the white wolf#bucky barnes incorrect quotes#sam wilson#sam wilson x reader#sam wilson x you#the falcon#the falcon x reader#sam wilson incorrect quotes#marvel#marvel x reader#the avengers#mcu#avengers#avengers x reader
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Bucky: Who the fuck broke the toaster?
Y/N: It was Sam.
Steve: It was Sam.
Natasha: Sam broke it.
Sam:
Sam: ...yOU PROMISED-
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes#the winter soldier x reader#the winter soldier x y/n#the winter soldier x you#the winter soldier#sam wilson x reader#the falcon x reader#steve rogers x reader#captain america x reader#natasha romanoff x reader#black widow x reader#marvel incorrect quotes#incorrect marvel quotes#marvel
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How i imagine Avengers family game night goes:
Peter: pay me my money
Sam: nnnnno
Nat: don't worry I have a gun
Peter: You have a gun??
Bucky: I have one too
Steve: NO
Steve: NO GUNS
#.thewrittenpodcast#incorrect marvel quotes#marvel incorrect quotes#marvel mcu#iron man#peter parker#mcu avengers#mcu marvel avengers#incorrect avengers quotes#incorrect avengers#the avengers#marvel avengers#incorrect peter parker#mcu peter parker#marvel#tony stark mcu#iron man mcu#mcu steve rogers#incorrect steve rogers#incorrect captain america#captain america#mcu natasha romanoff#natasha romanov#natasha romanoff#black widow#bucky barnes#the winter soldier#sam wilson#the falcon and the winter soldier#source: loosely based on a scene from scandal
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Bucky: When I was a kid, I always wanted to be a magician. Steve: Tell them why you stopped? Bucky: I... I almost cut someone in half with a saw. Tony: What the fuck?? Sam: What kind of kid were you? Bucky: I didn't know a magician was fake! I thought they were real! That's why I didn't become one. Natasha: That's why?? Bruce: Not you nearly cutting a kid in half?! Bucky: The kid was fine. My dad stopped me before I could hurt him. Tony: Poor guy. At least he's safe from you now. Bucky: Huh? He's standing right beside me. Steve: I'm the kid. Bruce: And you still ended up being best friends?! Sam: I take it back. What's wrong with the both of you?!
#clint who grew up in the circus: that sounds like a completely normal thing to happen#clint: I still remember some tricks want me to show you?#Bucky:...yes please#everyone else: no!#steve: *long suffering sigh*#incorrect quotes#incorrect mcu quotes#incorrect avengers quotes#mcu#marvel#avengers#bucky barnes#the winter soldier#steve rogers#captain america#sam wilson#the falcon#tony stark#ironman#bruce banner#the hulk#natasha romanoff#the black widow
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words by @headcanonthings
I'm really loving these incorrect quotes lately.
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Chapter 2: 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐚 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐝?
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Word count: 1,5 k
Summary: you and Bucky said your goodbyes and you faced a grueling night shift. However, the next morning your now favorite customer returns.
Warnings: drunk men * men who touch you without your consent * Simply... warnings are men
Tag list: @mcira @robynanthonystark @sofiaavarga13
(if you want to be added write to me)
ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇɴᴛꜱ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀᴘᴘʀᴇᴄɪᴀᴛᴇᴅ <3
You're in bed after an exhausting night. After Bucky left, the bar gradually filled up completely, both inside and outside. Both you and Megan worked those hours; alone, it would have been impossible. While you were working, some men took the liberty of touching you without permission, and you can still feel their touch imprinted on your skin. You hate this job more and more, and knowing that you have to return in a few hours doesn't console you at all.
The next morning, Bucky was already there at opening time. He helped you set up the bar by bringing out the tables and chairs, then positioned himself in the same spot while you washed the counter.
“Same drink?” you ask him, and he shakes his head.
“What’s the point if you don't let me get drunk?” he chuckles. “I'd like a coffee,” he adds. With a smile, you prepare it for him.
“How many glasses do you need to get drunk?” you ask curiously. A normal person would be drunk after just two glasses of your strongest drink, but Bucky, even after five, simply felt more vulnerable.
“Too many,” he replies, focusing his gaze on your sweet face.
As the bar gradually fills with people wanting breakfast, you serve everyone with a smile. Bucky watches your every move intently, and under his gaze, you feel embarrassed, wishing he would leave and come back when the place isn’t so full. You know the skirt of your uniform moves too much, and you’re afraid Bucky might turn out to be like the other pigs who frequent the bar. Yet, you want to trust him. As soon as there are no more customers to serve, you return to Bucky.
“Isn’t working in a uniform like this suicide?” your favorite customer asks, and you nod. He understands. He knows what drunk men do to cute girls like you at the bar.
“But I know how to defend myself,” you tell him with a wink. He raises an eyebrow, unconvinced.
“This bar, and you, need a bodyguard, don’t you?” he suggests.
“You’re kidding. No, I don’t need one!” you laugh at his words. He seems too serious, so when the next day your employer announces Bucky as the bar’s bodyguard for night shifts, you’re left speechless.
“You’re crazy,” you tell him with a smile during your morning shift, him sitting in the same place and you behind the counter.
“But now you won’t have to be afraid anymore,” he replies. He’s completely right. With someone to defend you from other men, you feel safer and the job seems less burdensome. You place your warm hand on top of his.
“Thank you very much,” you say sincerely, offering him a coffee and a brioche. Although he isn’t crazy about sweets, he decides to eat it to avoid hurting your feelings and shares it with you. He feeds you a piece because your hands are dirty with soap, and seeing you get dirty with chocolate cream makes him smile, a cute smile that will remain imprinted in your mind.
Today, Bucky stayed less, and during your second shift, he only stopped by to say hello before you saw each other again at night. He’s dressed in a tight black t-shirt, revealing his vibranium arm, with the bar's logo, and simple sweatpants. When you saw him, you were transfixed by his irresistible charm. He greets you and Megan, who wonders if having a bodyguard will make shifts calmer, without men touching you inappropriately.
“Good evening, stud,” Megan says in her usual flirtatious tone, which for some reason bothers you. He returns the greeting with a wave.
“Do you prefer me to position myself inside or outside?” he asks, his hoarse voice sending a shiver down your spine.
“Stand at the door and keep an eye on both inside and outside,” Megan replies. You agree, so you don’t say anything else. Before starting your shift, you and Megan usually share a chocolate bar. Today she brought it, gave you your share, and then went to the counter, leaving you alone with Bucky for a few minutes.
“It’s our custom,” you tell him, showing your piece of chocolate with a smile.
“A lucky charm?” he asks, and you nod, breaking your part in two and giving him a piece, which he accepts with thanks.
“Luck will be needed by those who watch you,” he says, and you blush, giggling. You hold up the piece of chocolate as if to toast and then eat while looking at each other. Your gaze focuses on him as he swallows, showing his Adam's apple.
You let him go, and he positions himself at the door, watching both inside and outside without losing sight of you.
“That man is crazy about you,” Megan whispers in your ear while eating her chocolate. You blush and shake your head.
“He’s just grateful because I didn’t let him get drunk,” you reply and then take table six’s order. Megan doesn’t say anything else and goes back to serving her regular customers, flirting for tips.
You take a tray, place the drinks on it, and head towards the table with your usual smile. You see Bucky’s eyes on you and give him a reassuring smile. That table starts whistling as you approach, and your smile fades.
“Is your number included with the drinks?” someone asks. You ignore it and serve the drinks as quickly as possible. One guy puts his hand on your thigh, and before he can go further, Bucky is behind you.
“Having a nice evening?” Bucky asks in his deep voice.
“We wanted to have fun with this little doll,” the customer replies, tightening his grip on your thigh.
Your bodyguard pulls you close, making the guy's hand slip away. Your back is against Bucky's chest. You feel his chest rise and fall with his breath, his scent filling your nostrils. You think you’re about to faint.
“Go to the counter and don’t move,” he whispers in your ear. Blushing, you do as he asks and prepare the other orders. From there, you see Bucky still talking to that table when one of them stands up and punches him in the face. Bucky remains unfazed, touching his lip where you see a small wound. He then walks away, leaving the drunkards behind. “It was a pleasure talking to you too,” you hear him say as he walks away.
“How are you?” he asks you.
“You’re the one with the bloody lip,” you giggle, wetting a washcloth to dab his wound.
“Why didn’t you hit him back?” you ask.
“My job is to protect you, not kill anyone,” he answers. “Trust me, if I wanted to, I could kill him right now,” he adds, and you smile. He got punched just for you. Before returning to his station, he asks if you’re okay and if you need anything. How can a man be so thoughtful after only a few days of knowing each other?
The rest of the evening goes peacefully. No one else dares approach you after seeing Bucky protect you. With that arm, it’s not a problem for him to send someone straight to the afterlife. You’ve never had such a peaceful and pleasant evening. Men limit themselves to compliments, women ask for Bucky’s name, but you (for some reason) pretend not to know him. Megan can’t help but notice the connection between you.
When closing time comes, your colleague leaves in a hurry. You change into something more comfortable for walking at night. You thought Bucky was already gone, but he’s waiting for you at the door.
“I’ll walk you home,” he says. It’s not a polite question but an order. But you don’t mind.
“Has anyone ever gone further?” he asks, walking next to you. You nod, shivering at the memory of certain creeps.
“Luckily, they never got too far. I have many precautions,” you assure him. He had already imagined scenarios of you being abused, but knowing they didn’t succeed makes him feel better.
When you arrive at your house, you notice his lip has worsened. You force him to come upstairs and sit on the armchair while you fetch the first aid kit. You carefully disinfect the wound. He feels a bit of pain but tries not to show it to maintain his mysterious demeanor. You put a band-aid on him, and he thanks you for your kindness.
“Thanks to you. I’ve been working at that bar for months, and today was the first time I didn’t feel in danger at every table I served,” you confess. You accompany him to the exit with regret, suggesting he stay over since it’s late, but he flatly refuses. Before he leaves, you kiss his cheek to say goodnight.
“Goodnight, pretty girl,” he answered and giggling you slowly closed the door. Now every time you hear "pretty girl" you can't help but think of Bucky.
Outside your door, he touches his cheek where your lips had been, and the memory makes him blush and a smile appears on his lips.
Thanks for reading! If there is something you want to tell me about it feel free to tell me. I would also like what you think and how you would like it to continue <3
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#marvel#mcu#marvel mcu#fanfic#headcanon#bucky barnes#bucky headcanon#bucky fanfic#james bucky buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#bucky#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes incorrect quotes#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x female reader#james barnes#james buchanan barnes#the falcon and the winter soldier#winter soldier x reader#the winter soldier#winter soldier x you#winter soldier x y/n#midnight guard#bucky fic#bucky fluff#bucky buchanan#james buchanan bucky barnes
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Incorrect the falcon and the winter soldier quotes
(Sam and Y/n sitting in jail together)
Y/n: So who should we call?
Sam: I’d call Bucky, But I feel much safer in jail.
#bucky x female reader#bucky imagine#bucky barnes x reader#Incorrect the falcon and the winter soldier#sam wilson#Sebastian stan#anthony mackie#Captain America#Funny#Marvel
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[The Avengers cooking skills]
Sam and Wanda: [master chef]
Bucky: [knows a few recipes]
Yelena: [can follow instructions on a box]
Carol: [made toast once]
Kate and Scott: [banned from the kitchen]
#source: unknown#sam wilson#sam wilson incorrect quotes#falcon#captain america#wanda maximoff#wanda maximoff incorrect quotes#scarlet witch#bucky barnes#bucky barnes incorrect quotes#winter soldier#yelena belova#yelena belova incorrect quotes#black widow#scott lang#scott lang incorrect quotes#ant man#kate bishop#kate bishop incorrect quotes#hawkeye#carol danvers#carol danvers incorrect quotes#captain marvel#marvel incorrect quotes#marvel#avengers#avengers incorrect quotes
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Sam and Bucky seeing Peter without his mask for the first time.
Sam: *horrified* That's a child.
Bucky: *equally horrified* I can see that.....
Sam: We fought a child.
Bucky: No, we lost a fight to a child!
Sam: That's worse.
Bucky: It-it could be better.
Sam: We fought like hell, it is not better.
#peter just standing by awkwardly listening to two grown men have an existential crisis#marvel#mcu#incorrect marvel quotes#peter parker#sam wilson#bucky barnes#spiderman#falcon#the winter soldier
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Y/N: I know everything about these motherfuckers at this point.
*points to Loki* That one is an insecure buffoon whose lonely ass watches you idiots sleep.
Loki: …
Y/N: *points to Sam* Wilson is a bleeding heart who wants to solve everybody else’s problems except his own.
Sam: What?! No - I - what? PFFT! No…
Y/N: *points to Bucky* This one judges everyone and everything because he hates himself.
Bucky: *growls*
Y/N: And Wanda?
Wanda: *stares Y/N down*
Y/N: Yeah…you don’t even wanna know what her deal is.
#incorrect quotes#incorrect marvel quotes#source: hazbin hotel#marvel cinematic universe#marvel#mcu au#mcu#don’t know what this pov is#was bored#😅#imagine#mcu fanfiction#loki x you#sam wilson x reader#bucky x reader#wanda maximoff x reader#loki series#wandavision#falcon and the winter soldier
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