#incorrect the dark artifices quotes
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kaitcreates · 2 years ago
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Mark: Which one of you was going to tell me that tea tastes different if you put it in hot water?
Julian: You were putting it in cold water?
Emma: Mark. Answer the question, Mark.
Mark: Yeah? I though for, like, five years that people just put it in hot water to speed up the tea-ification process. Didn't realize there was an actual reason. You think I have the patience to boil water, what the fuck???
Kit: You don't have the patience to microwave water for three minutes?
Cristina: Why are you putting it in the microwave to boil it?
Kit: Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove?
Cristina: It takes less than a minute.
Emma: Bestie is your stovetop powered by the fucking sun?
Cristina: How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove?
Emma: Like seven minutes.
Kieran: Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat and it boils in like two minutes.
Julian: You're putting the whole mug on the stove?
Dru: Every single person in this family is a fucking lunatic.
Ty: Do none of you own a kettle?
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starrieshq · 6 months ago
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Tessa: Crap. The printer broke while printing Kit's birthday invitations.
Jem: What was it supposed to say?
Tessa: "Kit's Birthday"
Jem: What does it say now?
Tessa: "Kit's Bi"
Jem:
Jem: Works out either way.
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silmarillaure · 5 months ago
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Ty & Dru: *wearing slightly lighter shades of black*
Helen: I see you're breaking out the spring colors.
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culiehua · 7 months ago
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Magnus: Sir, you are honorbound to protect these kids. Can you handle that?
Chairman: meow
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drublaccthorn · 5 months ago
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Dru: people are shipping us
Ash : TO WHERE?!
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witchcraftandgeeknes · 1 year ago
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Klaus: You know, I was starting to think that was a rumour Rebekah made up, like the Loch Ness Monster or the Bermuda Triangle.
Stefan: Rebekah made up the Bermuda Triangle?
Klaus: Don't be ridiculous, Stefan. That was Kol.
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dayque · 5 months ago
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Ty: I really like octopuses.
Kit: What a coincidence, I really like you.
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Sel: Alice is looking at me with judgment.
Bree: She’s not, that’s just her face.
Sel: You looked at me the same way. Judy face.
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laylaxcarstairs · 7 months ago
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Emma: You just need to sit back, relax, and let me do what I do best.
Julian: Stressing me out?
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arcs-01 · 8 months ago
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Kit in end of TDA *
Kit : isn't it amazing how I can feel so bad and yet look so good?
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keithblackthorn · 1 month ago
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kit: 10,000 years? that’s like 1,000 + 10!
ty: times 10
kit: whatever, dropout
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kaitcreates · 1 year ago
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Cristina: I saw Kit crying, and then his alarm went off and he stopped? Just like that? Julian: It’s called time management, Cristina.
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starrieshq · 6 months ago
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Julian: You really put everything aside to come save me? How'd you even get here?
Emma: Several traffic violations
Dru: Three counts of resisting arrest
Mark: Roughly 13 cans of energy drinks
Ty: Also, that's not our car.
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okayclaryfray · 1 year ago
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TSC characters as inaccurate memes I stumbled upon
Simon while dating Clary:
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Jace:
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Clary and Julian:
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Clary telling Simon about kissing her brothers:
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Dru about that aunt from England:
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Clary around Jocelyn:
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Anyone about Sebastian:
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Jace:
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culiehua · 8 months ago
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Magnus: Unhand me you egg-sucking, lily-livered, jive-talking whackadoo! Foul villain! Cur! I bite my thumb at thee, you ugly motherfucker, so hasta la bye-bye, daddy-o!
Asmodeus:
Asmodeus: just tell me to fuck off like a normal child
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wessasbitch · 11 months ago
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Emma: sometimes I drink milk straight from the container.
Mark: the cow??
Emma: what?
Julian: Mark, W H Y?
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