#incorrect rhysand quotes

[ladylokilaufeyson5]

Rhys: You look gorgeous, Y/n

Y/n: You're not even looking at me

Rhys: I know, but Azriel's heart just started beating faster

Azriel:

Y/n:

Azriel: Fuck you

[acourtofmishapandmistakes]

Feyre: Where are the boys?

Mor: Oh, you didn't know?

[nebarious]

Cassian: *sneezes*

Azriel: ......

Cassian: *sneezes*

Azriel: ......

Cassian: Are you really not going to say bless you?

Azriel: Y/N is sitting here with us. You've clearly been blessed

Y/N: *blushes*

Cassian: *looks at rhys* Did he just use my allergies to flirt with your sister?

Rhysand: This fucker need to be studied

[acomaflove]

Azriel: *sneezes and shadows come out of his nose*

Rhysand:

Amren:

Morrigan:

Cassian:

Feyre:

Nesta: ………So we are all just going to ignore that?

Cassian: Oh my bad; bless you, Azriel.

Nesta: THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT

[velidewrites]

Feyre, to Rhys: I love laying my head on your chest when you’re sleeping so I can hear you breathe

Nesta, to Cassian: I recorded you snoring so you can hear how fucking loud you are and why I can’t fucking sleep

[incorrectacotarblog]

Cassian: the word daddy has been so sexualized

Cassian: my kids are gonna have to call me bruh or something

[shallyne]

Feyre: it's my wedding day

Rhys: Nuh uh

Feyre: THE FUCK YOU MEAN NUH UH?

[aprill-99]

Rhys: “So let’s see if I’ve got this; you have immense shadow power, incredible combat skills, height, tattoos, secrets, dead parents, a thirst for vengeance, the weight of the world on your shoulders, a rebellion to lead, and a dragon?”

Xaden: “Yeah? I mean, there’s also my girlfriend who I’m completely in love with and 107 people under my protection but-”

Rhys: *frantically flipping through papers* “this is the hyper-intelligent girlfriend with unprecedented lightning powers? The one you speak to with your mind and call a nickname permanently?”

Xaden: “I do only have the one girlfriend. Kinda offended you’d think otherwise.”

Rhys: *signs a paper* “Adopted. The rebellion thing is handled. Me and your aunts and uncles have got this. Your new mom is going to need some time to add you and your mate to the family portrait gallery. Your bedroom is upstairs, knives are in the training ring, family dinner is every Thursday, your allowance is infinity and your curfew is never.”

Xaden: “I am…. Older than your wife?”

Rhys: “Did I fucking stutter?”

[qu1cks1lversb1tch]

Astera, lounging in an armchair with a book abandoned in her lap: If I had a title that didn't directly tie me to my home court or my brother, what would it be?

Cassian, immediately: Shadowfucker

Azriel, after a few moments of contemplation: Lady of Nightmares

Cassian: That one's good. She's terrifying.

Astera, cracking an eye open to glance at Cassian: I'm not that bad, Cass

Cassian, side eyeing her: . . . Riiiiiiiighhhht

Rhysand, smirking:

Astera, with a sigh: Rhys, I swear to gods. . . If you say 'the High Lord's whore'

Rhysand: I didn't. . . Say anything. But you did, darling

Astera, regretting asking the question: Yeah, I won't be the High Lord's whore tonight

Rhysand, gaping at her: Now that's not fair

Azriel, raising an eyebrow at her: Who will you be?

Astera, casually: Shadowfucker, probably. . .

Cassian: Can. . . Can I?

Astera: Maybe

Your honor, they're so silly. I love them.

[born-to-riot]

Cassian: Azriel, Two truths and a lie, who would you fuck if you had the chance?

Azriel: alright bet.

Rhys: Give us three names and we’ll guess which one is the lie.

Azriel: option one, Hybern’s headless corpse

Cassian: woah, woah, woah bro WHAT—

Azriel: option two, bryaxis

Rhys: Azriel what?

Cassian: HOW DARE YOU?

Azriel: and finally option three, Eris Vanserra.

Cassian: …

Rhys: …

Azriel: tell me brothers, which one is the lie?

Cassian: …

Rhys: …

Cassian: I…

Rhys: I think it’s better off if we don’t know.

Azriel: suit yourselves 🤷‍♀️

[azrielsshadows42]

Nyx: Why is it called a painting?

Nyx: It's done. It should be called a painted.

Rhysand: *sobbing* Nyx, please, it's 4AM... go to sleep.

Cassian: He's right though

Rhysand: STAY OUT OF OUR ROOM!

[ladylokilaufeyson5]

Rhysand: Go over there and flirt with them. Just say some cheesy pick up line

Y/N: Okay

Y/N walking up to Azriel: I like my partners how I like my intrusive thoughts

Azriel: ?

Y/N: Fucking me over in the middle of the night

Rhysand: Oh Mother above

[acourtofmishapandmistakes]

Cassian: So... I've seen you've been spending a lot of time with Rhys recently.

Feyre: No, Cassian, it's not what it looks like. I swear.

Cassian: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?

Feyre: No! You're the only one for me.

Cassian: Is that so?

Feyre: I promise. Rhysand and I are just bonded, okay? He's my mate.

Cassian: So there are no best-friend-feelings involved?

Feyre: You are still my one and only best friend! He's just the love of my life, nothing more!

Cassian: But I'm still the platonic love of your life, right?

Feyre: Of course!

Rhys:

Rhys: What the-

[nebarious]

Azriel: *cuts his finger*

Y/n: let me kiss it better

Azriel: *blushes*

Cass: his dick also got hurt

Rhys: what the fuck is wrong with you?!

[acomaflove]

Rhysand and Azriel: *walk into the room laughing*

Feyre: SHHHHHH! You’ll wake the baby.

Rhysand, whispering: I thought Mor was babysitting Nyx tonight?

Feyre: She is.

Rhysand:

Feyre:

Azriel:

Rhysand, LOUDLY whispering: THEN WHO IS THE BABY?!?

Feyre: *points to Cassian passed out on the sofa*

Rhysand: You did not just refer to a 500+ year old war general as a BABY.

Feyre: Correction: An Illyrian Baby.

[velidewrites]

Feyre: You have nice eyes

Rhys: Thanks, your kids can have them too