#incorrect night court quotes
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
boasamishipper · 6 months ago
Text
Harry: I married my husband. I love saying “my husband.” It sounds so adult. “That’s my husband.” It’s great, you sound like a person. I said it even before we were married. We were once getting on an airplane, and Dan’s ticket didn’t say anything and my ticket said “priority access.” It doesn’t matter why. But we were getting on and I said, “Uh, can my husband board with me?” And they were like, “Yes, of course. Right this way.” And I was like, “Oh, that is so much better than all those times I was like, ‘Can my boyfriend come?'”
14 notes · View notes
42-rats-in-a-trenchcoat · 1 year ago
Text
Dan: oh please God, just give me a sign!
Harry: *walks through the door*
Harry: Hey Dan!
Dan: Not exactly what I expecting but beggars can't be choosers
4 notes · View notes
shallyne · 9 months ago
Text
Feyre: it's my wedding day
Rhys: Nuh uh
Feyre: THE FUCK YOU MEAN NUH UH?
1K notes · View notes
acomaflove · 2 months ago
Text
Azriel: Bat of Mischief
Feyre: So your abilities give you the ultimate degree of stealth, right?
Azriel: Yes…………where are you going with this?
Feyre: I was just wondering if you have ever used them for fun stuff, like pranks.
Azriel, grinning like a fiend: Oh, absolutely. I still occasionally use them to tie Cassian’s boot laces together when he isn’t paying attention.
Feyre: So THAT’s why he fell the other day after dinner!
Azriel, still smiling: It’s been 40 years and he STILL hasn’t figured out why that keeps happening to him.
442 notes · View notes
aprill-99 · 1 year ago
Text
Rhys: “So let’s see if I’ve got this; you have immense shadow power, incredible combat skills, height, tattoos, secrets, dead parents, a thirst for vengeance, the weight of the world on your shoulders, a rebellion to lead, and a dragon?”
Xaden: “Yeah? I mean, there’s also my girlfriend who I’m completely in love with and 107 people under my protection but-”
Rhys: *frantically flipping through papers* “this is the hyper-intelligent girlfriend with unprecedented lightning powers? The one you speak to with your mind and call a nickname permanently?”
Xaden: “I do only have the one girlfriend. Kinda offended you’d think otherwise.”
Rhys: *signs a paper* “Adopted. The rebellion thing is handled. Me and your aunts and uncles have got this. Your new mom is going to need some time to add you and your mate to the family portrait gallery. Your bedroom is upstairs, knives are in the training ring, family dinner is every Thursday, your allowance is infinity and your curfew is never.”
Xaden: “I am…. Older than your wife?”
Rhys: “Did I fucking stutter?”
2K notes · View notes
lyssasdrafts · 10 months ago
Text
kidnapper on the phone: we have your son
feyre, staring at nyx: he’s with me right now?
kidnapper: then who’s this illyrian demanding we cut the crust off his sandwich and read him bedtime stories?
feyre: …
feyre: i can’t believe they have cassian
851 notes · View notes
i-only-see-daylight · 11 months ago
Text
*Having a family dinner*
Amren: Can you pass the pepper?
Cassian: What’s the magic word?
Amren: *Clearly not impressed*
Amren: *Starts chanting in the old language*
Cassian: *Panicking and shoving pepper into Amren's hands* JUST TAKE IT! TAKE IT, OH MY GOD!
550 notes · View notes
lavenderandturpentine · 4 months ago
Text
Feyre: *breathes*
Rhysand: Thank the gods and the heavens above for blessing me with this beautiful woman to be my mate.
377 notes · View notes
ravlykpavlyk · 4 months ago
Text
aftg is both my therapy and the reason I need this therapy.
136 notes · View notes
incorrect-piltover-quotes · 3 months ago
Text
Vi: I was a pretty lousy sister.
Caitlyn: You couldn't have been that bad.
Vi: My last words to Powder were "There is no Santa Claus."
Ezreal: What!?
Caitlyn: Don't listen to her, Ez.
78 notes · View notes
totallyrwbyquotes · 3 months ago
Text
Winter: I was a pretty lousy sister.
Blake: You couldn't have been that bad.
Winter: My last words to Weiss were "There is no Santa Claus."
Ruby: What!?
Yang: Don't listen to her, Ruby.
132 notes · View notes
acourtofmishapandmistakes · 9 months ago
Text
Shadowsongs
Tumblr media
Summary: After Rhys and Feyre decide to take a trip away to the Summer Court for the night to escape the thralls of their newborn, Azriel is left caring for Nyx and finds that his greatest battle might just be getting him to sleep. I also recently rewatched the Labyrinth and forgot how much that movie slapped so the song from that is included.
As the Velaris tower clock chimed midnight, the sitting room of the River House was enveloped in the soft, ambient glow of faelight. Azriel sunk deeper into the plush, green, velvet couch, his expansive wings draped elegantly over the back of the chair, eyes heavy with exhaustion. His hand rhythmically patted the back of the squirming bundle nestled snugly against his chest. The babe, Nyx, resisted sleep with the tenacity of an Illyrian warrior, his tiny fists punching the air as if to protest the very concept of bedtime. 
The room was a playful mess, strewn with toys - dolls lay abandoned, blankets were tossed aside, and bottles had rolled under chairs. Azriel had assured Feyre and Rhys he could manage babysitting for a day and night. They desperately needed a break after months of non-stop parenting in tandem with running the Night Court, and a trip to the breezy shores of the Summer Court was the only thing keeping Feyre from collapsing into tears. Feyre had sobbed when they left, overwhelming Azriel with reminders of Nyx’s schedule and a litany of do’s and don'ts, which Azriel already knew inside and out. Her maternal instincts flared to the point where Rhys had to gentle pull her away, reassuring her that Nyx would be fine for one night, and, if anything, they should be more concerned about Azriel surviving Nyx than Nyx surviving Azriel. 
Typically, everyone shared babysitting duties throughout the week day, but with Nesta and Cassian off in the Autumn Court, Elain incapacitated by her first fae cycle, and Amren claiming she would rather cut out her own tongue than be left alone with a babe, the responsibility had fallen to Azriel. Leaving Nyx overnight for the first time might have been a tad ambitious. 
“Come on, Nyx,” he coaxed with a whisper of amusement. “You’ve got to give in at some point.” Azriel briefly considered that perhaps this was how the victims of his torture efforts may have felt when they had been kept awake for hours on end. Perhaps he should start having them babysit a fussy Illeryian babe instead of cutting off fingers. He chuckled to himself before pushing the thought away.
Yet, Nyx remained defiant, his violet eyes locked on the ceiling, deep in thought, as if unraveling the secrets of the cosmos rather than giving in to slumber. Azriel exhaled deeply, his fingers threading through his tousled black hair. After learning about Feyre’s pregnancy he had stealthily devoured every parenting book Feyre had purchased, to the perfect formula-to-water ratio, optimal bath temperatures, and baby sensory activities, he had learned it all. When Feyre faced challenges with breastfeeding, Azriel had accidentally revealed his clandestine studies by suggesting a particular latching technique. Cassian had teased him relentlessly since. Despite employing every baby battle strategy known to him, Nyx was relentless.
With a resigned sigh, Azriel sank even further into the plush cushions, resigning himself to a long night. As he watched Nyx’s tiny chest rise and fall with each breath, he couldn’t help but marvel at the sheer stubbornness of the new babe. Azriel couldn’t tell if that was more from Feyre or Rhys, and then decided that that trait most likely came from his Auntie Nesta, whom Nyx had wrapped around his tiny, chubby fingers.
In the dimly lit room, Azriel’s gaze followed his shadows as they danced across the ceiling, capturing Nyx’s rapt attention. With a grin, he watched them twirl and twirl – they were always more playful when Nyx was around. His shadows seemed as curious about Nyx as he was about them. During gatherings at the River House, it wasn’t uncommon for the shadows to envelop Nyx, tickling him and teasing him, eliciting peals of laughter from the delighted babe as he reached out to catch them. 
Elain had said before that the shadows and Nyx reminded her when she and her sisters were young, a black barn cat would seek her out to frolic among the late summer heat. Azriel wondered what Nyx made of these ethereal companions, if they were like an animal to him, or another playmate. He also pondered whether the shadows would maintain their fascination with him as he grew older. Azriel, himself, hadn’t spent much time around children this young, and his shadows seemed to be so gentle with the babe, as though they somehow could sense his innocence and hoped he would keep it forever.
As Azriel and Nyx both kept their gaze to the ceiling, the shadows began to craft intricate shapes and forms, transforming into a mesmerizing puppet show. Nyx’s restless squirming subsided as the shadows danced across the walls, casting enchanting silhouettes that swirled and twirled in their silent ballet creating a tableau of delight.
On the ceiling, an array of animals appeared in what resembled a grand ballroom scene. Pegasus, birds, and sheep mingled before parting to reveal a single swan, its wings unfurling with ethereal grace. The swan bowed elegantly before twirling loftily above its admiring audience. Then, emerging from the gathered shadows, a sly fox approached, gracefully taking the swan’s wings in its paws and spinning it in a delicate dance. Although the room was silent, one could easily imagine the soft strains of music. Nyx reached up excitedly, prompting Azriel to adjust his hold, lifting him slightly higher for a better view.
As the dance continued above, some shadows descended the walls and playfully twirled around Nyx, their cool touch eliciting giggles from the dark-haired babe.
The shadows conjured forth visions of Nyxs’ family, distant echoes of life beyond the cozy sitting room. 
In one corner of the room, the shadows morphed into delicate snowflakes cascading down the wall. Above the floorboard, three figures raced across the scene – two winged Illyrians and one without wings. The winged males playfully lobbed snowballs at their wingless companion, who shielded his head with his hands. Suddenly, a log sprung from the ground, causing the wingless man to trip and tumble face-first into a pile of snow below. The two other males doubled over with laughter, one even dropping to his knees as the snow continued to fall. Nyx’s eyes widened with wonder, his tiny fingers reaching out to grasp the fleeting shapes. The snowball fight between his father and brothers drew excited coos and giggles from him, his laughed echoing around the room.
In the other corner, the shadows drifted into a scene of a woman standing at an easel, the woman's stomach swollen with child. The shadow woman stood before an easel, her brush moving across the canvas, she ran her hand over her stomach, glancing down towards it when a man walked in behind her, twirling her around into an embrace. The man leaned over, placing a tender kiss on the woman's stomach. Nyx babbled joyfully, his tiny feet kicking Azriel’s chest with delight, which while uncomfortable brought a smile to his face.
Across the ceiling, the shadows painted a scene of a great battle, a field of war and chaos as two winged males fight back to back against a vast army, shooting arrows and swinging swords. 
While the shadows swirled the tapestry of memories, Azriel looked only at Nyx, who giggled and babbled in delight at the unfolding scenes. With each passing moment, it became increasingly apparent to Azriel that while the shadows were doing their best to soothe Nyx to sleep, they had only awakened him more. It became glaringly obvious that bedtime stories wouldn’t work. 
Nyx’s giggles and coos echoed through the River House. With a sigh, Azriel gestured for the shadows to cease their dance, and the room was once again plunged into a soft, dim glow. 
“Alright, Nyx,” Azriel murmured, his voice gentle but tinged with exhaustion. “Let’s try something else.”
He drew Nyx back into his arms, cradling him close against his chest. Rising from the enveloping comfort of the couch, Azriel’s footsteps were muted against the plush rug of the sitting room as he began to meander through the house. Moonlight streamed through the towering windows, casting the ornate corridors in a serene silvery light, illuminating the walls adorned with Feyre’s vibrant paintings. 
Feyre and Rhys had both endured their share of sleepless nights, pacing the same halls with Nyx in their arms. Rhys had noted that being the babe of the Night Court it seemed all Nyx wanted to do was explore the world when the sun had set and all had gone quiet. Perhaps Nyx was more bat than babe.
Undeterred, Azriel pressed on, his footsteps echoing through the halls as he swayed in arms in a steady rhythm. But Nyx remained stubbornly awake, his eyes darting from window to window cooing loudly. As he reached the grand staircase that spiraled upwards, a faint cry echoed through the silence. Nyx stirred in his arms, his tiny fists clutching at his shirt as he let out a wail. 
Azriel attempted to shush the fussy baby who now was wailing louder for what seemed no apparent reason. Perhaps Nyx was finally fighting exhaustion as well. With a sigh, Azriel retraced his steps, as he stepped into Nyx’s nursery. 
Feyre had taken months to finally get the nursery the way she envisioned it. She had wanted Nyx’s room to encompass the entirety of Prythian as they were unsure what powers Nyx might hold. 
Each wall of the room was a canvas of vibrant colors and intricate designs including the bay window that Feyre had insisted be where Nyxs’ bassinet be. 
Painting the Spring Court wall had been a battle unto itself with Rhys and Cassian joking constantly that the wall should be burning to the ground, or that she should paint Tamlin being pursued by a dragon. Feyre had just shot them an obscene gesture and instead painted spring blossoms of pastel pinks and greens. Delicate flowers bloomed amidst emerald meadows, their petals unfurling in the warmth of the sun. Amongst the meadow was a warm pool with a waterfall cascading down a mountainside. 
Opposite, the wall of Summer blazed with the fiery hues of the sun, a tapestry of gold and crimson beamed down onto the deep blue sea, where Tarquin’s white castle glistened atop the white sandstone mountain. 
Next to it, the wall of Autumn was a symphony of earthy greens, oranges, reds, and browns. The Autumn Court forest held deep shadows which made the wheat fields protruding from them seem like shining gold. Lucien had helped Feyre paint this wall, and his awkward-looking, disproportionate deer and fawns clearly showed that. 
Beside the Autumn wall, the Winter Court lay shrouded in a blanket of icy blues and silvery whites. Snowflakes danced amidst frost kissed pines, their branches bending beneath the weight of the winter embrace. Bears and arctic foxes scampered on the piles of snow, wearing the traditional colors. Elain had insisted on giving the little foxes scarves. Azriel had reminded her they were made for that sort of weather but Elain had only glanced at him sadly before saying “But what if they get cold” before she painted tiny mittens on the bears. 
On the half of the ceiling closest to the door, Feyre had painted the Dawn and Day courts. Sunlight streamed through branches of ancient oaks as it rose from the corner of the room, and hills of rolling green with children from each court playing amongst them filled out the space. 
Over Nyxs’ crib, Feyre had painted a deep blue color of the sky with a sparkle of stars strewn across it. Rhys had enchanted the space just below the ceiling to be constantly in motion with sparkling star dust which moved in and out of constellations, with the occasional shooting star flying high above. 
As Nyx continued his tirade of shrill cries, Azriel rocked him around the room, shushing him as much as he could. As he continued to sway gently with Nyx in his arms, the baby began to quiet, his tiny body nestled into Azriels chest as his breaths steadied. With a tender smile, he began to sing, his voice a gentle melody through the darkness, like a whispered prayer. 
“I saw my baby, crying hard as babe could cry,” he sang, “What could I do?” 
With each note, Nyx grew more and more relaxed, his eyelids fluttering closed from the gentle cadence and rocking. 
“My baby’s love had gone and left my baby blue” he sang, his voice soft and tender, “Nobody knew.” 
Azriel watched Nyx’s tiny fingers curl against his chest, his breathing slow and steady and sleep drifted closer. 
“What kind of magic spell to use, slime and snails, puppy dog tails, thunder or lightning,” Azriel continued to sing as he wandered carefully over to the crib. 
“Dance magic, dance magic dance, dance magic dance,” He lowered Nyx into the soft blue oasis. “Jump magic, jump, jump magic, put that baby’s spell on me, kiss my baby, make her free,” Azriel placed his palm onto Nyx’s chest and continued to rub back and forth soothingly. 
“I saw my baby,” He continued, softer, more of a whisper, “Trying hard as babe could try, what could I do?” Azriel dropped to his knees, his fingers tracing the lines of the baby's face as he rested his arm on the side of the bassinet and laid his head atop it. “My baby’s fun had gone, and left my baby blue, nobody knew.” Nyx’s soft pink lips fell open slightly as his eyes finally closed and his head fell to the side. Azriel smiled and found his eyes drifting shut as well. 
Feyre found them the next morning that way. Nyx sprawled on his back, his tiny fingers wrapped around Azriels, and Azriel, a piled heap on the floor, his wings splayed on the floor behind him with his head still resting against the crib. 
Rhys walked up behind her as Feyre motioned him silently. “I guess he does sleep,” she whispered.
“Who?” Rhys chuckled, “Az or Nyx?”
Feyre turned her head to look at Rhys, “Both I guess.” 
Rhys asked Feyre if she planned to go in and wake either of them up but Feyre only shook her head, “I think they both could use a little more time.” 
With that, Feyre shut the door quietly, leaving the warrior and the babe to sleep a little longer.
163 notes · View notes
Text
(when Hangman is a guest instructor at TOPGUN, but Rooster has just messaged him that he just got to town) Hangman(to Maverick): Captain, circumstances of a very urgent, personal nature have arisen and regrettably force me to ask for the rest of the day off. Maverick(not looking up from his paperwork):....Sex or money, Hangman? Hangman: Oh, I'm hurt! Oh, I'm offended! That you would jump to such an assumption! Has it ever occurred to you that I could be in the middle of a, a personal tragedy?! (Maverick looks up at him and quirks an eyebrow) Hangman:....Sex!
257 notes · View notes
shallyne · 8 months ago
Text
Rhys: How's your head?
Feyre: I haven't had any complaints yet
Rhys: Excuse me?
Feyre: I'll live
319 notes · View notes
acomaflove · 7 months ago
Text
Nesta: Can you come with me to come bail Cassian out of jail?
Rhysand: I think you can handle chastising him on your own.
Nesta: But who is going to handle reprimanding Feyre when she gets bailed out too?
Rhysand:
Rhysand:
Rhysand: Not again
738 notes · View notes
aprill-99 · 1 year ago
Text
How it started *Under the Mountain*:
Feyre: “So that’s the love of my life.”
Rhys: “Really? Tamlin? That guy?”
Feyre: “Yeah. Thoughts?”
Rhys: “And prayers. Girl what-”
Where it went *Early ACOWAR*:
Feyre: “So this is my mate.”
Lucien: “Really? Your mate is that guy?? Rhysand???”
Feyre: “Yeah. Thoughts?”
Lucien: “And Prayers. Girl what-”
2K notes · View notes