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acrobaticcatfeline · 5 years ago

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Logan and His Little Bumble Bee (Single Dads AU) Chapter 4!!!

Word Count: 3643

TW: swearing, deceit, vague mentions of vague trauma, arguments, crying, unconscious projecting, one quick mention of homophobia, roman is a big nervous a lot lmk if I missed anything!!!

Notes: This was out way sooner than I expected. So I made this one revolving around Roman and Dmitri for once, because we don’t get that much and now he has thoughts and things to say!!! Anyways it starts a bit angsty but its really soft and fluffy and I love my baby gays. It’s dialogue heavy this time around, it’s almost as if my writing changes subconsciously depending on which character I am writing. Huh. I hope you enjoy it, I worked my butt off for it. Previous chapter here, first chapter here!

Summary: “you are 15 years old! Absolutely not!!!” Logan is having trouble letting Roman be himself, projecting his own bad experiences on him without realizing it. Roman and Dmitri kiss a lot because they’re really soft and really gay.

“you are 15 years old! Absolutely not!!!”

“dad people in my grade have been dating since they were 10 come on!”

“and they're irresponsible and don’t know better! Roman it is not a good idea-”

“Logan dear be rational; kids are supposed to-”

“NO!”

Everyone paused as Logan screamed. Roman had flinched and Logan winced knowing he caused it, but he couldn’t just stop at this point.

“Roman, dating this young is a bad idea, take it from me. I mean that was when I got together with mercy-”

“you can’t say that like it’s the biggest mistake you’ve made dad!!! Because… because if it was then I would have-I know it ended badly with you and her, but you were still happy at the time! You can’t just keep me from experiencing things because you're scared dad. I'm not you. I-I need to live my own life eventually, and if I don’t know how to then what am I gonna do when I'm an adult?”

“you don’t- Roman that isn't necessary to be happy, I mean look at me and Patton-”

“well maybe I don’t want to pine for someone for 9 years!!! Maybe, maybe I want to live my life now, instead of waiting in fear!!! Maybe I want my happily ever after before I settle down, maybe, for once, I want to live my life without worrying that I'm a disappointment to my parents!!! I know you don’t mean to but you just, you make everything so hard! You-you have so much, so much hope. That I'm going to be this perfect kid and I'm gonna grow up to be amazing, and its exhausting! I want to make a decision without worrying that I'm going to do wrong by you! And then mercy… mercy never saw me for me, and I always had to be perfect for her and she's gone now but I'm just so tired dad! I'm tired of trying to fit inside this perfect box that I think you have for me, I want to be a teenager, I want to date, I want to go to parties, I want to make mistakes and not cry myself to sleep thinking I've made you hate me. It’s so hard to try to make you happy all the time. I want to have a chance to just make me happy.”

Logan stared at Roman. He had been trying so hard to protect him and take care of him, and all he had been doing was overwhelming him. He had never meant to do any of it, Roman was right, but he went back through his brain and it hurt to see that he had unconsciously pushed his son onto a pedestal that was impossible to escape from. He was never disappointed in him, whether he did good or bad or made mistakes, he had always tried to show that he was proud no matter what. He felt tears welling in his eyes and saw Roman twist uncomfortably. He felt Patton's arm wrap around his shoulders, but he couldn’t stay there, his mind was racing too fast. He was catastrophizing he knew, but he couldn’t so easily stop himself. His head was knocked out of the process when Roman ran into his arms, wrapping him in a hug. He let his arms fold around his sons waist, letting a few tears fall.

“I'm sorry, I'm so sorry dad I just- I needed to tell you and I was going to tell you in a nicer way, a better planned way but then this happened and it all came out I'm sorry dad I didn’t mean to make you cry”

“it’s- its fine Ro. I needed to hear that from you. I'm. I'm sorry Ro I didn’t mean it. I try so hard to show that I'm always proud of you, god you have helped me so much and I've never realized that I was making you feel so pressured I'm sorry bee, I’ll try harder, I didn’t know-”

Logan’s head was buried in Roman’s chest, it was the benefit of his son growing taller than him, he could hide his tear stained face out of sight. He sniffed a bit, rubbing his eyes before letting go of him. He smiled widely at Roman.

“I was wrong to have set such impossible standards. It was wrong of me to treat you like I had a second chance at my childhood. I really, just want the best for you but-”

He took a sharp inhale and looked him in the eyes.

“but its your life. And-and if you want, if you want to date. Then, I-I support you completely. Because, because I love you Roman. So so much.”

His eyes teared up again, and he let out a choked laugh while rubbing his eyes clear. Roman smiled at him and hugged him again, thanking him profusely. At that point Virgil walked back inside. He looked at the scene, sending a questioning glance at Patton over the other two. Patton let out a small smile and shook his head, to which Virgil shrugged and went upstairs without a further thought.

“so, he was fine with it?”

“I mean he wasn’t, but I explained a few things and he's fine with it now. It took a little bit of the harsher truths to be spilled for him to understand my point, and a few tears, but yeah.”

“wow. I haven’t seen… either of you cry in my entire time knowing you.”

“yeah it doesn’t happen often. I think the last time I saw my dad cry was when he told me that mercy wasn’t coming back.”

“geez that’s a long time. And its always baffled me that I've never seen you cry; I've known you since you were 2.”

“yeah, I'm a uh, private crier. I don’t think I've cried in front of people really since I could talk.”

“fuck man how the hell did you manage that?”

“… I mean I don’t remember it, but I think it was a leftover from when I still lived with mercy.”

“what.”

“eh, it doesn’t matter.”

“no wait what? What did she do to you?”

“pfft, I just told you Vee, I don’t remember. I get vague fuzzy feelings that are sorta like if memories were feelings, but otherwise I have no idea.”

“that’s fucked up man”

“meh. Anyways back to the original topic, soooo can I get Dmitri's number?”

“oh my god.”

“oh, and you're at 75 cents.”

“shit.”

“a dollar!”

Virgil had handed over his number easily, smirking as Roman gave him a hug before dashing into his own room. Roman had immediately sent Dmitri a text, ‘hey, its Roman! Dads way more chill now so I stole your number from Virgil’ and he had responded almost immediately.

‘neat so are we gonna talk about what that was?’

‘I mean, I thought it was p straight forward, but I mean if you think we should?’

‘I mean yeah but’

Radio silence for a minute

‘but like, idk if you want this to be serious or smth like, casual. I mean I don’t care either way’

‘oh! Well something serious sounds nice!’

‘thank god I was not prepared for something casual regardless of what I said’

‘pfft, its fine tough guy’

‘if that nickname sticks you gotta use it around rem, it'll make him bug out’

‘alrighty! Tough guy~’

‘ouch yo chill it with that I'm in public’

‘pfft ur a dork Dee!’

‘I am absolutely not a whale’s penis and I'm offended you would even imply it’

‘oh my god I'm gonna break up with you’

‘nooooo don’t do that I'm too dark and mysterious to be broken up with for that’

‘dark and mysterious my butt! The only dark thing about you is your humor and the only mysterious things about you are your eyes!’

‘babe I have a reputation to keep up!’

‘guess your rep will just have to fit me in there somewhere then!’

‘god you are adorable, I gtg before you somehow make me start uwuing at my family’

‘uwu bye bye mistew dmitwi!!!’

‘god its disgusting kill it with fire’

‘love you too Dee! <3<3<3’

‘<3’

Roman set down his phone afterwards, feeling the butterflies attacking his insides like rabid animals. He changed the tab over to his YouTube and put on his headphones, listening to his curated BTS playlist, starting off with answer: love myself, bopping along and humming. He switched the tab and scrolled through Tumblr smiling at the posts about his favorite superheroes.

The next week was absolutely blissful for Roman, he alternated between sitting at his table with a few of his acquaintances who he would chat with about his hyperfixations, and with Dmitri and his friends. Virgil had a different lunch hour luckily, otherwise he would have been slightly embarrassed. But hilariously the first day he sat with Dee, his friends were caught off guard as a boy in soft pastels and stonewashed jeans sat beside Dmitri and was immediately nestled underneath his arm. There were words signed across the table and Dee would chuckle and respond which sent their eyes flying to Roman in his seat as he ate his sandwich oblivious to the reason he was being stared at, just sending kind smiles back at them.

When lunch had ended, he had stood on his toes and kissed Dee’s cheek and his friends all had the shocked looks on their faces again. He ran off to class and had forgotten about the whole interaction afterwards. He was only reminded after school through a text from Dee.

‘sorry about my friends at lunch, they're judgmental shits. I told them off but knowing them they might continue to be asshats anyways’

‘huh. Didn’t even notice. I really need to get around to fully learning sign, I have the smallest feeling that if I'm hanging out with you more it might possibly be useful.’

‘meh, if I really need you to know something and I can’t talk I’ll just text you.’

‘mmm but I still want to learn! Anyways what were they saying’

‘oh they were being dicks about your clothes and then they were being shits about me dating you, they're assholes, I only hang out with them cuz coach had everyone learn sign for me and they're the only people I can talk to during the school day’

‘oh, that’s rude! Do you want me to stop hanging out with you at lunch?’

‘no not at all, I just want you to know what you're getting into’

‘mhm!’

The next time Roman sat with them, he had sent about 8 insults to the people around the table while Dee wasn’t looking, essentially ‘fuck off you judgmental homophobic dicks’ and after that the group shut their traps about him and Dee.

The week after, Dmitri was busy almost always. There was a big game this weekend and he Remy and Virgil were always either practicing, doing schoolwork, or sleeping for the most part. He would send good morning and good night texts but that was mostly it and Roman felt dumb for missing him so much. Virgil invited him to practice after seeing him sitting around staring at his phone like a kicked dog.

He had sat on the bleachers, watching the coach drill them and them playing near their best. They had taken a rest and Dmitri had made his way up to him, a giant bottle of water in hand. He smiled and let out a croaked hello.

“oh, Dmitri when was the last time you spoke?”

He had coughed and held up a 6 on his fingers. Roman pouted and placed a kiss on his chapped lips. Dmitri waved his hand to say it isn't a problem with a smile on his face and it made Roman pout more and kiss him again, wrapping his arms around himself after. Dee ruffled his hair and went to say something when the whistle blew calling them back. He sighed and stood up, signing ‘I love you’ before rushing back to the field. Roman sat in silence, watching them play once again.

Roman was beaming. The game was today and that meant he would get Dmitri back afterwards along with Remy and Virgil. He was filled with jitters; he knows the team had been working tirelessly for the whole week and he was excited to see his friends kick the rival schools butt! He was rushing Patton out the door again, just like he was a few weeks before but for a separate reason this time.

He wasn’t expecting the time at the game to fly as quick as it did, but here he was. It was nearing the end and they weren’t very far ahead, and the worry was clear on the teams faces. And then Dmitri had the ball! The crowd roared in surprise and excitement as he weaved around the opposition. He got caught near the goal and Roman was on the edge of his seat as Dmitri kicked the ball straight into the goal. The cheers were immediate, the buzzer signaling the end of the game followed a few seconds later. Roman was up and standing at the edge of the guardrail of the bleachers jumping up and down and screaming. He raced down and met Dmitri at the entrance of the showers, looking around before tugging him off towards the underside of the bleachers. He spoke in barely restrained squeals.

“Dee I'm so proud of you!!! Oh, my goodness you did so well!!! I can’t even-”

Dmitri cut him off with a kiss, one that Roman reciprocated immediately, wrapping his arms around his neck and tilting his head as well as he could with the height difference they had when suddenly he wasn’t standing on his own feet but being held in the air from his waist. He broke the kiss with a squeak, placing his hands-on Dmitri's shoulders as he was hoisted in the air by a happy Dee. He squeaked again as he was spun around before being set on the ground. When he was steady again, he looked up at Dmitri with an amused but confused face.

“we did it”

“you did! Had you not processed that yet?”

“not really no.”

“oh, my goodness you are a dork.”

“listen if you had scored the last goal you would be a little stunned too”

“valid however-”

“oh, just shut up and kiss me again you prep”

“gladly”

“ey before you two start making out you might want to go talk to the team? They're sort of wanting to congratulate you, but you disappeared.”

Roman froze in embarrassment at his brother catching them. Dmitri just smirked and turned to face him.

“listen if any of them could get a significant other they would understand. But considering that even you haven’t gotten the nerve to ask out Remy yet, I guess they wouldn’t so I guess I should grace them with my presence, huh babe?”

“hey, fuck off my little brother didn’t need to know I like your brother!”

“oops!”

Roman giggled a bit at the blush that spread across Virgil's face. He nudged Dmitri.

“be nice honeybee. And he's right, I stole you from your festivities! We should head back over; we can be cute later”

“nonsense, that implies that you can stop being cute”

“bluhhhh that’s my brotherrrrr come on you two, be gross later”

“DMITRI THAT WAS LEGENDARY!!!”

Dee had a cocky look on his face as his teammates congratulated him, Remy running up and tackling in a hug at first sight. He chuckled wordlessly at his brother who was screaming praise at him and then dragging him into the showers. The team followed them in all continuing to shout praise and Roman contemplated following as well. He eventually just went in after about 10 minutes, finding Dmitri surrounded by his team and. He blanched and turned around a corner, hiding his face in his hands. On the other side, Dmitri sat with blue jeans and no shirt, still dripping water from his hair. He took a few big breaths before wandering back over, not trying to push past anyone and just standing where he knew Dmitri could see him. He flushed when Dmitri smiled and winked at him over the heads of his teammates, curling up in his arms and covering his face again. He whispered to himself in his hands

“gosh I'm really gay and he's unfairly pretty”

It wasn’t much longer before the group had filed out, done with the celebration, Virgil given him a nudge as he left. He walked in, seeing Dmitri finally pulling out his shirt, and Roman couldn’t help but turn away with a bit of shyness hitting him again.

“what's up Roman? You good babe?”

“mhm! You just um,”

His mouth felt dry as salt and he was wondering when that happened.

“you look nice…”

“pfft you're a nerd.”

Roman’s mind came up with several scenarios for what could happen as he stood up to kiss him. Of course, all that happened was hands around his waist as Dee leant down to give him an easier time. He still felt fuzzy but ignored it as Dmitri pulled away to put his shirt on, quickly pulling on his leather jacket on afterwards before placing a kiss on Roman’s temple and grabbing his hand.

“come on, I'm stealing you, my folks are treating the team to ice cream and pizza and they’ve been wanting to meet you.”

“wh-what? Wait you talk about me with your parents?”

“Remy sold me out day one, but yeah, they seem genuinely interested in meeting you, so I mean why not?”

“oh. Ok then. I should probably tell my dads first, but I’ll be back!”

He ran up to Logan, wrapping him in a hug before explaining everything to him and Patton. Logan looked unsure but Patton backed him up.

“Lolo, Virgil's going to be there too, and it’s not like he's going to be stranded! Plus, there's a new diner that opened a bit ago that I've been wanting to take you to!”

“…ok. You have your keys and your wallet and your phone, right?”

“yes dad!”

“…ok then. Go have fun. Let me or pat know when you are coming home.”

“ok! See you guys tonight! Love you!!!”

The party was far more calm than Roman had expected, most of the team dipping early on leaving just him and Virgil as guests. Neither could complain, they had free access to an abundance of pizza and ice cream, and they could spend uninterrupted time with the objects of their affections. Virgil and Remy had absconded upstairs playing games or something while Roman was sitting next to Dmitri and his parents.

“how long have you been dating now?”

“um, 2 weeks!”

“wow! And you two are already attached by the hip huh?”

Roman nodded as his cheeks burned. He felt his boyfriends arm snake around his waist, pulling him closer.

“oh, you two are adorable! We’ll leave you be, don’t have too much fun with him kiddo!”

Roman visibly relaxed as they left, leaning against his boyfriend and letting out a sigh. Dmitri moved his arm up, running his fingers through his hair, grinning at the purr like noise Roman made in response.

“you should stay the night”

“my dad wouldn’t let me do that unless-”

Virgil stormed down the stairs with a lovesick expression.

“Roman we’re staying the night!”

“oh! Does dad-”

“yeah don’t worry its fine they're chill!”

“what happened?”

“I-”

“BOY YOU BETTER GET BACK UP HERE AND KISS ME I'M HAVING KISS WITHDRAWL”

“let’s say me and Remy are a thing now? Gotta go!”

“…about what I was saying…”

“isn't that the best timing huh?”

“oh hush!”

“wanna head to bed? It is pretty late.”

“um, sure. But I wanted to cuddle some more…”

“who said I was gonna stop cuddling you nerd?”

“I? um uh”

“you can share a bed without it being sexual I hope you know.”

“oh! Oh yeah I totally, yeah duh, of course”

“come on babe”

Roman frowned at him rolling his eyes but followed him upstairs. He had walked into his room and grabbed some clothing before filing into the bathroom. When he came back, Roman had to confronts his gay again, as he was shirtless once again and he was talking to him and he's got to focus dammit!

“-so that’s why, also I have various pajamas in there, and I also have shirts that are probably way to big for you in there as well, take your pick.”

“oh um, I was just gonna sleep in this!”

“…yeah no. those jeans are way too form fitting to get away with sleeping in, and your shirt does not look nearly comfortable enough.”

“o-okay then I guess…”

He grabbed a pair of sleep shorts and one of his shirts and headed into the bathroom. When he came back, he immediately launched himself into his boyfriends’ arms. Dmitri giggled seeing the shirt choice, placing a quick kiss on his nose.

“nah you're a sarcastic butterfly”

“shhhhh I'm a sarcastic mothhhh”

“keep tellin yourself that precious”

Roman sputters a bit before giving up and hiding his face in Dee’s chest. Dmitri goes back to playing with Roman’s hair, and Roman leans into the touch. After a bit of time passes, he stops, and nudges Roman fully into bed.

“why’d you stop?”

“because that’s not a comfortable sleep position. Lay down prep, sleep is important.”

“but I don’t want to sleep, I want kisses”

Dmitri rolls his eyes and kisses Roman. By the time he pulls away, Roman has passed out. He laughs quietly and wraps his arms around the smaller boy, letting himself drift off as well.

Taglist: @fivebyfive-finebyfive @tacohippy56900 @analogical-mess @crookedlyoptimisticdestiny @angels-and-dreams @fandomloverangel @asleepybisexual @starbucks-remy @idioticsky @ijustreallylovesanderssides @superwholocked-for-life @band-be-boss-blog @llamaly @logicality-trash @fiive-second-cookies @whats-going-on-kiddos @snowshoe-main-blog @007ardra @internetwhy @musikasworld @Sammy-is-obsessed

Let me know if you want to be tagged in my writing!!!

Thank you for reading I will see you later ladies lords and nonbinary royalty!!!

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ctfmeister · 6 years ago

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I’m R̶o̶y Daisy

“Umm… I can explain?”

Sweat poured profusely down Robin’s face. In front of him, stood his wife Lucina bearing a look of both disgust and confusion as she gazed upon a totally pantless Robin and an exposed Marth laying down on Peach’s bed while wearing pink lingerie.

“What the name of Naga is going on here?” Lucina asked, pure unadulterated anger in her voice. She firmly placed her hand on her sword handle, ready to unsheathe at any moment.

It was over for him. There was no way to recover from this. He wanted to explain to her that it wasn’t what it looked like. But it was exactly what it looked like. He’d just had sexual intercourse with Marth dressed as Princess Peach. There truly was no other possible answer for what had just happened in this room. Nevertheless, Robin was still a tactician, so god damn him if he didn’t at least try to get himself out of this situation.

“Er- Lucina! You see… When I got here, Marth was covered in Princess Peach’s clothes! So, I started undressing him and he thought it was some sort of game and he started to undress me! So really, it’s just a big misunderstanding.” Robin said nervously, anxiously fiddling his fingers while hoping she’d taken the bait.

That’s when he saw it, a sudden glimmer of hope. Lucina cocked her eyebrow up, as if she was actually considering what he’d said as a real possibility. Robin mentally pumped his fist. He could do this. He could totally do this. All he had to do now was keep the story going and maybe he could get out of this scot-free.

“Oh Lucina dear…”

A chill went down Robin’s spine as soon as he heard Marth’s high-pitched voice resonate from behind him.

“There’s no reason to be upset.” ‘Peach’ continued. “If you were actually able to pleasure your husband, he wouldn’t need to come to me for release.”

Robin’s heart sank to the ground, his head turning down to the floor in fear. He was fucked. There was definitely no coming back from this. Slowly lifting his face back up, Robin was met with Lucina’s deathly glare. Her face was painted pure red, boiling over with unsurmountable amounts of anger. Without second though, she quickly unsheathed her sword.

“I’m going to fucking kill you!” Lucina yelled out, as she bolted towards Robin.

Raising her sword in the air, Lucina swiped it down towards Robin with all the force she could muster up. Fortunately for Robin though, his reflexes were fast enough that he was able to catch Lucina’s arms mid swipe, preventing her from slicing him in half.

“Lucina please!” Robin pleaded desperately. “I know it looks bad, but I swear it really is just a big misunderstanding.”

“You just had sex with them!” Lucina retorted.

“I did not-”

“Yes, and it was the best sex he’s ever had!” ‘Peach’ added, interrupting Robin before he could defend himself.

“GYAHHHHHH!!!” Lucina shrieked at the top of her lungs, summoning all the force she could to push her arms down even harder.

“Lucina, LUCINA!” Robin tried to appease her. “Yes, I had sex with Marth.”

“Grrrrr…” Lucina growled at the thought.

“But! It was for a very good reason! He um… He-” Robin gulped. “He looked very attractive wearing Princess Peach’s clothes.”

“GRAAAAAHHH” Lucina kept pushing down against Robin with the strength of the exalt blood that coursed through her veins, until the tactician could hold her force no longer and the two fell down onto the ground.

Robin quickly shook his head, trying to orient himself from the fall. Now he was laying down on the ground, with Lucina sitting on top of him. Noticing this change in positioning, Lucina once again lifted her sword up and brought it crashing down onto Robin, but just like before the tactician was able to stop her at the right time.

“Look! Ok, I’m sorry Lucina!” Robin relented. “I’m sorry I cheated on you with Marth.”

“Cheated on me? Do you really think that’s the problem here?” Lucina asked furiously.

“Huh?” Robin said, clearly confused.

“You just had gay sex with my great ancestor!” She continued. “The Hero-King Marth! A man who’s been adored and idolized for centuries by my family and my country. You turned him into a dull-headed bimbo slut and fucked him! Do you know how humiliating that is? Do you know how much you’ve sullied the name of the Hero-King?” She sighed. “And not only that, I’m also partially responsible for this. Oh Naga, if people were to find out I allowed this, I… I would be executed! Burnt at the stake! Only then I would be able to pay for my crimes…” Lucina looked away to the distance, all glimmer gone from her eyes.

“It’s ok!” Robin piped up. “Nobody has to find out! We can just keep this a secret.”

“Oh, we will keep this a secret alright…” Lucina said, anger boiling up in her face as she focused on Robin again. “A secret you’re going to take to your grave!”

With that, Lucina struggled free of Robin’s grasp. She raised her sword in the air once more and then sent it crashing down towards him. “HYAHHHH” She screamed with a thunderous roar.

In a moment of panic Robin lifted his arms to cover his face and closed his eyes. He’d lived a good life up to now. He’d met a ton of friends, won a bunch of battle, had sex with a crossdressing Hero-King and even gotten invited to an interdimensional tournament. Hopefully the afterlife would be as kind to him as his current one. And then…

THUNK!! A large bumping sound rang out into the air. Not really the sound Robin was expecting, considering it should’ve sound of a blade slicing his body in half, but what did he know? He was dead. Not only that, but his death was also surprisingly painless. He’d always thought that his end would be long a painful, struggling his best to stay alive as he fought to the bitter end against some brigand or dark deity. But he didn’t even feel any part of Lucina’s blow. Maybe he’d died super fast.

…

He wasn’t dead, was he?

Robin slowly opened his eyes to see Lucina still sitting on top of him. She bore an angry expression, though her sword was no longer inches away from his face. Maybe she’d had a change of heart? He raised his hand to ask her, but before he could even get a word out Lucina promptly plopped down onto the ground, falling completely unconscious.

“Wha-?” Robin’s eyes widened in surprise.

Looking over to where Lucina once was, Robin found Marth standing tall before him, a dented frying pan in his hand.

“Robi, is she always like this?” ‘She’ asked. “Sometimes I wonder why you decided to marry her…”

With a look of joy in his face, Robin quickly sprang up and gave Marth a hug.

“Oh Marth! Thank you so much, you save my life!” He exclaimed.

Marth blushed, his penis hardening a bit. “I-i-i-it’s nothing! I w-would do anything for my Robi~”

“Although if you call me Marth one more time you’re going to be the next one to get hit by this frying pan.” ‘Peach’ said in a stern tone.

Robin giggled. “Oh alright, ‘Peach’. I’m sorry I’ve been calling you Marth for so long.” He said facetiously.

And in that moment, all was instantly forgiven. At this point her lovely Robi had been calling her Marth all day, so hearing him call him Peach for once made her heart stir.

“So, what shall we do with her then?” ‘Peach’ asked.

“I’m not sure… But I do know she’s probably going to be angrier when she wakes up…” Robin replied, thinking deeply. “I don’t want to harm her or anything though. I just want her to understand that I might have gotten a bit carried away and made a mistake.”

‘Peach’ frowned at the thought. She didn’t really appreciate the magic that happened in this room a few minutes ago being called a mistake. Meanwhile, Robin closed his eyes and rubbed his chin pensively. If only he had a way to make people more understanding… More agreeable… More open to suggestion… Robin’s eyes bolted wide open.

Lucina slowly opened her eyes as she started waking up. Her head buzzed terribly, a parting headache fogging up her mind while her eyes adjusted to take in her surroundings. What had happened to her? The last thing she remembered was… Something with Robin? But that’s it. And now for some reason she felt absolutely dreadful, like someone had hit her with one of those hammers that randomly appeared in the tournament. Sighing, Lucina tried to take her hand up to massage her aching head, but instead she found that her arm was completely immobilized.

“What the-” Lucina breathed out in confusion.

She then tried to move her other arm but realized that this one too was stuck. Lucina began to struggle with her body. She tried to stand, but it was to no avail. Its as if she was… She tied up. That’s when she looked down and saw it. Wrapped tightly around her body was a rope, connecting her to the chair she was sitting on while her arms were stuck behind her back.

“What is going on?!” She shouted in distress.

“Oh, you’re finally awake!”

A gasp left Lucina’s mouth as she heard Robin’s voice. Maybe he’d know what was happening.

“Hey Robin, what-” Lucina’s thought halted in its track, her heartbeat stopping for just a second.

For behind Robin she saw her great ancestor Marth, wearing Princess Peach’s clothes. A part of her immediately thought it was a nightmare. Maybe a part of her hoped that it was a nightmare. But as the sight of the Hero-King in a dress was burned into Lucina’s eyes, memories of the events that occurred just a few moments ago began to pour into her mind. In a blink of an eye, all of her pain and confusion transformed into unmitigated rage.

“Robin, you dastard! I’m going to kill you!” She yelled out in anger, trying to struggle out of her constraints with all the strength she could muster.

“Now, now Lucina. Why don’t we calm down and try to talk about this?” Robin suggested.

“There’s nothing to talk about here, Robin. You will be punished for your sins.” Lucina responded without remorse. “Now release me so I can impose divine punishment upon you.”

“See, this is why I tied you up. You’re way too heated about this.” Robin commented calmly. “Look, Luci. I didn’t mean for this to get so messed up. It’s just- It’s like I got a new toy and I really wanted to enjoy it, so I got a bit carried away. I’m sorry I brought dishonor to your family or what have you. I promise I won’t do it again.”

“Ok, apology accepted.” She replied.

“Wait, rea-?”

“NO OF COURSE NOT!” Lucina howled, interrupting Robin. “Did you really think I would just forgive you if you gave a flimsy apology?! You didn’t just cheat on me, you cheated on everyone that believed in the Hero-King!” She sighed. “Marth is… Marth is someone who is very important to me. Many nights when I felt like everything was lost or that my journey was futile, I would think about the Hero-King’s great quest. His bravery, his strength, his kindness… If it weren’t for him I don’t think I would’ve had the courage to try and save my world…”

Silence filled the room, Lucina somberly staring at the floor.

“That’s why I can’t have you defile Marth like this!” She yelled out, reenergized. “I’m sorry, but the only acceptable punishment for this is death!”

A loud sigh left Robin’s mouth. “Well, I tried.”

With a look of disappointment on his face, he reached towards his pocket and pulled out a small golden compass hanging on a chain. At first the gesture seemed strange to Lucina, but as soon as she realized what it was for she reeled back against the chair.

“You wouldn’t dare…” She said incredulously.

“I’m sorry but this is the only way.” He answered plainly. “Maybe if we’d come to some reasonable compromise I wouldn’t have to resort to this, but I don’t want to get murdered.”

“Are you being serious?!” Lucina asked. “This wouldn’t have happened in the first place if you didn’t hypnotize Marth and now you’re also going to hypnotize me!?”

“Don’t worry! I won’t make you do anything dumb, like Marth.” Robin reassured her. “I just wanna make it so that you’re not mad with me. Now if you’ll just focus on this compass…”

Robin hung the compass a few inches in front of Lucina’s face, slowly wagging it from left to right. But Lucina wasn’t having any of it. She quickly closed her eyes and slunk back into her seat.

“I’m not going to let you do this!” She shouted with confidence.

“Oh, Lucina… Don’t make this harder than it needs to be.” Robin implored. “Peach?”

‘Peach’ gave a faint nod and walked behind Lucina. She knelt down and placed her hands on the princess’ head, prying her eyes open by force.

“GYAHH!” Lucina cried out. “You! Can’t-!”

“Now, now Lucina. Just focus on the compass, okay?” Robin said soothingly.

The compass rocked left and right in front of Lucina’s face. She did as much as possible to prevent eye contact with it, looking in other directions and trying to struggle away from ‘Peach’s’ grasp as best she could. But the object always sat there in the corner of her eye, swaying rhythmically without any care for her intentions.

And the more she tried to ignore it, the more appealing the prospect of following it became. It was as if it was beckoning to her, softly calling for Lucina to let her apprehensions go and relax. It was actually kind of amazing to her how dangerous such a simple compass could be. She’d seen its work first hand when Marth was hypnotized so she understood how bad it could be, but at the same time it felt unreal. Could something like a swaying compass and a soft voice really be so powerful?

“That’s right, just follow the swings of the compass…” He continued.

Lucina gently shook her head, snapping out of the momentary trance she’d fallen into. While her mind drifted away to thoughts about the compass and hypnosis, her eyes had unwittingly begun to follow the object’s motions. She tried her hardest to focus on something else. The background, something on Robin’s shirt, the hatred that filled her heart when she thought of Marth having sex with Robin. But now a voice in the back of her mind began whispering to her, telling her to give up, to give in.

“Don’t focus on anything else. Just watch the compass.” Robin added.

With that, Lucina found herself unable to look at anything but the dangling compass. Every time she tried to look away, she found her head firmly pulsating in pain. Panic began to flood into her mind. Was she already under his spell? Was she already doomed? It was at moments like this when everything seemed lost that she’d find a way to fight her fate, yet now there seemed to be no possible solution.

“Good, good~” Robin sang tenderly. “Left, right. Left, right. It’s very relaxing to just follow the compass, isn’t it?”

All of Lucina’s worries then washed away as his words came over her. Her anxiety, her fear, her anger, all gone in the blink of an eye. Of course, there was still the existential threat to her person that came from falling under Robin’s hypnosis. But it just didn’t seem too important to Lucina at the moment. Being this relaxed made her feel pretty good, so why should she worry?

“That’s very good!” Robin praised her. “Now, as you keep on following the compass, you’ll become more and more relaxed and you’ll start to feel really good~”

A large dopey smile appeared on Lucina’s face as she practically melted onto her seat. Whatever her inhibitions about this were before, they were now totally gone. She felt so relaxed and pleasant right now, feeling even better and better by the second. This was the most relaxed she’d felt in her life! So relaxed in fact, that she didn’t notice that ‘Peach’ had let go of her a while ago, and was now just staring at the princess in awe.

“Relaxation is good~” He continued. “But now you’re starting to feel very sleepy~ Each time the compass swings, you can feel yourself falling closer and closer into a deep sleep.”

Lucina could feel her mind fog up as the small compass that was right in front of her rocked back and forth. Her breathing eased, eyelids drooping lower and lower as her already limited set of thoughts slowed down to a crawl. Honestly, at this point she was so relaxed it was a surprise she wasn’t already sleeping. Maybe she actually was fast asleep and she didn’t know it!

“Now, I’m going to count down to zero, and with every step I count down you will only feel more relaxed and sleepier.” Robin instructed her. “Then, when I get to zero, you will be in a deep trance and will obey all the commands I impose on you.”

In all honesty, Lucina probably should have been terrified from what Robin had just said. But the waves of relaxation that assaulted her mind were so powerful that she eagerly welcomed any more that could come in, pursuing that pleasant sentiment that permeated through her system.

“Three.”

A wave of relaxation hit Lucina square in the face like a sack of bricks. Calmness and pleasantness flowing through her body like water through a river. It was as if she was in another planet, or as if she was living the through the eyes of another creature, a much happier and relaxed creature. Her heart was filled with serenity, her body and mind pushed to the brink of their limits.

“Two.”

The entirety of her body was in a deep sleep, so much so that Lucina couldn’t feel any of it. The only thing she could feel was the increasing pleasure that assaulted her mind and how it kept fogging up her thoughts more and more.

“One.”

Her brain fizzed around, struggling to stay awake through the tremendous levels of tiredness she felt. Her thoughts fumbled around like one’s thoughts do during a dream, non-sensical and bizarre. Her eyes couldn’t even keep up with the compass anymore, fizzing about the room aimlessly. Surely her logical mind couldn’t keep up with the madness any longer.

“Zero.”

And then complete silence. Not a single thought crossed Lucina’s mind, rigidly sitting on her chair while she diligently waited for whatever command Robin gave her. Robin gave a content sigh watching over his work. The fact that he could do something as amazing as hypnosis with only a book’s knowledge made him a bit proud. But this wasn’t the time to toot his horn over his intelligence, there was hypnosis to be done.

“Lucina. You will- er-” Robin stuttered. “You’re going to- Um… From now onward, you will- ah- uh-”’

The command Robin had planned for Lucina was simple. ‘You’re not going to be upset about the Marth situation.’ That was it. So why did Robin find it so hard to say it? Maybe it was the fact that it was so simple that made it so hard for him to do it. Was it even really hypnosis at that point? It just felt like with such a command he wasn’t using his power to the best of its abilities.

Not that the point of this was to use hypnosis. All Robin wanted to do was make Lucina not angry. That was it. Anything more he did to her would be wrong. Actually, the hypnosis he was doing right now was probably already wrong. The only difference is that if he didn’t do this at least he would be lying on the floor with a Falchion going through his chest.

Robin shook his head. It was clear what he was supposed to do. He knew he shouldn’t be hypnotizing Lucina into something other than what he had planned. And yet, deep inside a part of him clamored him to do so. To make her believe she was a Cloud, or Donkey Kong or even something like Paulatena or Bayonetta. Just the prospect itself made him very aroused. It was wrong, so he shouldn’t do it, but…

“Lucina…” He cleared his throat. “You will…”

Was it really wrong? Wouldn’t it be more wrong not to use it? After all, he just got this amazing power, it would be such a huge waste if he didn’t use at least a little bit of it. Plus, if he did just make Lucina not angry with him, he would have to turn Marth back and never use this power again. Now that was truly wrong. No, Robin had worked very hard for so long. The least that he deserved was a little fun.

“From now on you will believe yourself to be Marth. You will act and think like him, no matter what anyone else says. Hey, you can even do that weird thing you did with your hair when you disguised yourself as Marth. You will basically become his identical copy.” Robin commanded. “Except for one thing. You are extremely interested in women. Around guys you’ll act like Marth would, but whenever you see a lady you’ll become a sly womanizer and try as best as you can to have sex with her. When I snap my finger, you will wake up and everything I say will come true. And whenever I snap my finger afterward, you will return to this trance to receive more instructions.”

Robin breathed heavily. He couldn’t believe he’d just done that. His dick was already growing hard from the thought of waking her up.

“Peach…” Robin uttered. “Please untie her…”

With a faint nod, ‘Peach’ walked behind Lucina and began untying her from the seat. Robin raised his hand and put it in position to snap, licking his lips impatiently, when he suddenly noticed ‘Peach’ and realized.

“Oh, and Peach,” Robin called to her. “You’ll probably want to cover your ears. Maybe close your eyes?”

He wasn’t really sure how that worked. Nevertheless, ‘Peach’ followed his command without a question in her mind. With all the pieces set, Robin set his fingers together and-

SNAP!

A loud snap roared through the room like thunder through a storm. Lucina’s eyes bolted right open. She slowly looked around the room, her mind taking time to reboot as if she’d just awoken from a deep sleep.

“So, ‘Marth’…” Robin finally said, unable to wait any more. “How are you?”

Lucina focused on Robin, who was standing right before her. She looked intently at him for some time, a confused look on her face. But as her head cleared, her befuddled look turned into one of warmth, a smile crossing onto her face.

“Ah! I’m feeling very well Robin. Thanks for asking.” ‘Marth’ replied. “How about-”

At that moment ‘Marth’s’ eyes darted down towards the tactician’s crotch, only to find it was completely uncovered, with his penis hanging out mightily erect. A blush came upon the prince’s face. He quickly turned away from it, only to notice the equally as naked Princess ‘Peach’ only wearing her bra.

“Errrr- I’m sorry, am I interrupting something?” ‘Marth’ asked shyly, blushing deeply as he stared at the floor.

“Unless… You two have finally accepted my invitation to join in a threesome!” ‘Marth’ perked up, a wide smile on his face. “Robin, your girlfriend is so very attractive. I’ve always wished to get some intimate time with her.”

“In your dreams!” ‘Peach’ retorted. She hugged one of Robin’s arms very tightly. “The only person I would ever have sex with is Robi.”

Robin on his end, couldn’t let out a single word. His penis poked out with a massive erection, one of the hardest he’d ever had in his life. The fact that he was able do this to Lucina made him so aroused any other thoughts were unable to form. He merely watched the hypnotized Lucina with lust and excitement

“Oh, very well then.” ‘Marth’ responded with disappointment. “In that case, I shall take my leave and let you two love birds get on with it. But if you ever change your mind just let me know!”

With that, ‘Marth’ quickly left the room. Robin basked in the high of hypnotizing someone else. It’s as if he was drunk with power, the fact that he could do such a thing to the usually inhibited Lucina made him feel truly powerful. With just a little bit of time and effort he could hold control over anybody’s mind. How amazing was that?

But when his high came down and reality settled in, a wave of guilt and regret began to wash over Robin. He really… He really had just done that, huh? And to his wife no less? Sure, hypnosis was fun and arousing but now that she was actually going outside and doing everything he told her to do around other people… Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. He should probably follow her and-

“Oh. My. God!” ‘Peach’ exclaimed loudly, interrupting Robin’s train of thought. “I cannot believe that just worked! Robi, that is so amazing! I didn’t know you could do that. Every day I fall more and more in love with you~”

The comment made Robin a bit happy, but the guilt he felt was so overbearing that it didn’t really help. No, what he did was wrong. He needed to go and-

“Anyways, now that that’s been dealt with…” ‘Peach’ then suddenly placed her hand on Robin’s erect cock, holding it tightly with a lustful look. “How about we enjoy some more alone time?”

Robin’s meat throbbed madly as it rested in ‘Peach’s’ palm. She was so hot and attractive… Maybe… Maybe he’d just spend a little more time with ‘Peach’. Then, he would go after Lucina. Yeah, that sounded like a great plan. With his worries gone from his mind, Robin hungrily followed ‘Peach’ onto her bed.

CLANG!

A loud bang resonated thunderously throughout the courtyard. Beads of sweat poured down Ike’s face as he pressed his Ragnell against ‘Marth’s’ Falchion. The two fighters stood face to face at a standstill, using all their strength to try to overpower the other. But it seemed they were evenly matched, as neither could deliver the finishing blow.

Then, with one swift motion, ‘Marth’ instantly shifted his position and removed all resistance from Ike’s way, making the mercenary lose balance. He then promptly tackled Ike to the ground, incapacitating and disarming his opponent in the blink of an eye. ‘Marth’ breathed a sigh of relief, sheathing his Falchion as he stood victorious over Ike.

For a while, Ike laid down on the ground confused, his mind having a hard time grasping what had just happened. But as the reality of defeat settled in, he couldn’t help but give a hearty chuckle.

“Oh man!” Ike exclaimed. “I can’t believe you beat me again!”

“I must have gotten lucky. That is all.” ‘Marth’ replied, extending his hand to help Ike up.

“No way!” Ike retorted, graciously taking ‘Marth’s’ help to stand up from the ground. “That’s like… The third time you’ve beaten me today. Even though we usually go pretty even. Surely you’ve come up with some trick!”

“Ah… Thank you, but…” ‘Marth’ blushed. “This is the way I usually fight…”

The two men walked along the field, making their way out of the battle area and into the common space whilst exchanging more banter. Meanwhile, Roy, the fiery headed young Pharean noble sat on a nearby bench. He had been watching the current battle closely, trying to see if he could learn anything from watching they two swordsmen clash blades. But after spending some time analyzing the way those two fought, something was bugging him… A strange feeling pecking at the back of his mind…

Marth was acting differently… It wasn’t too noticeable if you weren’t looking for it, but his teacher Cecilia always told him that you could tell a lot of a person from watching their fighting style, and Marth’s fighting style was totally different from what it usually was. Most of the time he was calm and calculated, only swinging his sword when necessary. But this Marth was more aggressive and swifter, totally different from the Marth he knew. Roy felt something was wrong, it just didn’t seem possible that Marth could have changed his dueling style in such a short time.

“So Roy, did you learn anything?”

Roy shook his head, parting from his thoughts as he heard Ike’s booming voice. He turned upwards to see the two fighters were now standing before him, sweaty and out of breath from their recent battle.

“Uh, yes!” He quickly replied. “Thank you very much Ike. And you too Marth… I’m sure what I saw from you will help me in my battles to come.”

Ike gave a loud chuckle. “That’s good to hear. Although in my opinion if you want to get better at fighting, then the best way to do so is to actually fight.”

“Yes, but there is more to fighting than just pure strength.” Roy calmly retorted. “A good strategy is also important from every fight. And you can learn a lot from watching the way others act during battles.”

“Yeah… I guess that’s why I’m not the tactician of my army, like you guys!” Ike responded with a wide smile.

All of a sudden, ‘Marth’s’ eyes lit up brightly.

“Ike. It was a pleasure sparring with you.” He said, patting Ike’s shoulder with a friendly demeanor. “Now if you’ll excuse me.

With that, ‘Marth’ walked away, leaving the other two swordsmen to themselves. Roy took this opportunity to stand up and get closer to Ike.

“Say, Ike…” He quietly spoke to the other man. “Don’t you think Marth has been acting a bit differently?”

Ike put his hand to his chin, giving it some deep thought. “Hmm… I don’t think so…”

“Really?” Roy gave him a look of surprise. “He was fighting so much more differently than he usually does. And there’s something different with his face… Even his voice was a little bit weird.”

But Ike shook his head. “Yeah, he fought differently, but I didn’t notice anything wrong with him. Maybe he was just trying a different fighting style.”

Roy looked down thoughtfully. Was there something really wrong with Marth? Or was he just thinking about it too much? Roy was one to worry about his friends, but maybe this time he was just being a bit too worrisome…

“Hello there, young miss!”

That was when they heard a loud voice blaring from the other side of the courtyard. Roy and Ike both turned in the direction of the voice to see ‘Marth’ standing quite close to Zero Suit Samus.

“I must say, Lady Samus, you are looking absolutely stunning today.” ‘Marth’ continued, a lecherous smile on his face. “That suit really compliments your features.”

Samus responded with a look of incredulity, not really sure if ‘Marth’ had actually said that or she had taken one too many concussions.

“Oh come on, turn that frown upside down.” ‘Marth’ said, pulling his body ever closer to Samus’. “Such a face is not fit for such a beautiful lady.”

But Samus didn’t appreciate this gesture one bit, for she quickly pushed ‘Marth’ away without any remorse.

“Ok, look here asshole.” She talked with stern in her voice. “I don’t really know what you’re doing or why, but if you don’t want to find out how deep I can shove my boot into your ass, then you better shut up.”

“Ah, what a sharp tongue you possess miss.” “Marth’ went on, completely undeterred by Samus’ threat. “But that’s ok. I like a little bit of spice in my treats.”

Roy could see the anger flare up in Samus’ face right as ‘Marth’ said that. Having had enough, she stomped away from the training field, holding in her urge to punch the annoying prince in the face as much as she could. Unfortunately for her though, ‘Marth’ had his eyes completely set, and just followed the space mercenary out.

Once the two were out of sight, Roy quickly turned to Ike, bearing a look that screamed ‘I told you so’.

“Alright, alright, you have a point.” Ike conceded. “Marth might be acting a little bit different, but it’s not that big of a deal. Maybe he just wants to get to know Samus intimately.”

“Isn’t Marth engaged?” Roy asked, eyebrow raised.

Ike sighed. “Ok well, I’ll agree that that’s not very good, but we’ve all been here for so long that I wouldn’t blame him. Look Roy, I understand that you’re concerned, and if it really bothers you I think you should talk with him. But I think you’re overthinking this.”

Having said his piece, Ike began parting ways from Roy. “Besides, I like this new Marth.” Ike continued “If he keeps beating me like this maybe I’ll learn something and not be one of the worst fighters in this tournament!”

Before long, the Greil Mercenary was out of sight. But deep inside, Roy wasn’t satisfied with his answer. This wasn’t the Marth he’d known and cared for ever since they both joined the tournament together. This felt like an impostor. Maybe Ike didn’t notice because he didn’t know Marth as well, but Roy couldn’t let this sit. He had to do something about it.

But the question was, what? He could ask Marth himself, but if this Marth really was an impostor then he wouldn’t tell that to Roy, and he would also find out about Roy’s suspicions. Then who knows what could happen. So, if he couldn’t contact Marth, then he had to do with the next best thing… His closest relative, Lucina. With a determined expression, Roy bolted towards Lucina’s room, ready to help his friend in need.

Load moans echoed wildly throughout Lucina’s room. There, on top of the princess’ bed, sat Robin, legs wide open, with a sex-crazed Princess ‘Peach’ slobbering ferociously up and down his erect penis. The two of them had experienced tons of wild and crazy sex in Peach’s room, but after a while Robin began growing scared that the actual Princess Peach would come in and fin them. Thus, he suggested they move to Lucina’s room for a ‘change of scenery’. It was perfect given that since Lucina was out there pretending to be Marth, no one would interrupt them here.

However, the change in setting did nothing to alleviate ‘Peach’s’ insatiable sexual desire for Robin, as she ferociously assaulted his penis with her mouth. Her tongue traveled from the tip of his shaft down to its base and his balls, leaving no inch of his manhood untouched. And the way she twirled her tongue about with grace and passion, Robin couldn’t believe she wasn’t a professional at doing this.

It was honestly astounding to him how amazing she had become at sucking his dick. Not to say that she was bad at it before, but her previous blowjob and this one were beyond comparison. It was as if ‘Peach’ had discovered all of Robin’s most sensitive and erogenous areas and was exploiting them to the best of her abilities, nibbling at the right places at the right times. As if she had become a master of his cock.

And this was exactly what ‘Peach’ wanted him to feel. After pleasing him over and over again, she’d closely observed every one of his reactions to find out what it was that made him squirm. For just seeing him groan happily was enough to fill her heart with satisfaction. Besides, knowing the in and outs of his body made her feel like she was his girl. And more importantly, it made her feel like he was her man. And that was a powerful sensation. To think that she could have such a tight control his sexual satisfaction made her very happy.

Thus, she continued to work up and down his pole, caressing his skin the same way an artisan crafts his masterpiece, sparing no expense in making sure she could make her Robi feel good. And boy did it feel good. Robin visibly squirmed as she licked and kissed his massive prick with a soft tenderness that could only come from true affection. But this teasing wasn’t all ‘Peach’ had mind as she played with his penis. No, this was but an appetizer, a sign of things to come. And the main was just about ready.

Planting a sopping wet kiss on his meat, Princess ‘Peach’ leaned away from Robin’s dick. She looked over the slimy penis with pride, admiring the fruits of her labor as well as the size of his monster. Which lead to the next part of her plan. Licking her lips with glee, in one swift motion she dove towards Robin’s crotch, swallowing his cock whole in a single blow.

Robin felt his body shiver as his entire member was engulfed by ‘Peach’s’ moist tight mouth. He grabbed the bed’s covers tightly, trying not to burst instantly from the flurry of sensations that assaulted his dick. The way ‘Peach’ bobbed her head up and down with delight was just unreal. She moved with such swiftness that one would think Robin’s tremendous cock wasn’t in her mouth. But it was, and Robin was enjoying every second of it.

KNOCK, KNOCK!!

Suddenly, Robin bolted upright, hearing a knock come from the door.

“Lucina! Are you in there?” Called a voice from outside.

Panic overcame Robin’s senses. Someone else was on the other side of the door to Lucina’s room. And if they entered, they would undoubtedly find out about his affair Marth, given the situation he was currently in. He definitely couldn’t have that. Even though they probably wouldn’t react the same way Lucina did, Robin wanted to take no chances. He couldn’t let anyone else find out. Thinking quickly, he pulled some of the bed covers on top of ‘Peach’ to hide her from plain sight.

“Sorry to bother you.” The voice went on, the door opening soon thereafter.

Then, as the person moved into the room, Robin could finally see who was interrupting his fun. It was Roy, another young fighter in this same tournament. Though he was still a boy and might not be too perceptive, Robin still tried his best to hide what was happening. He straightened himself stiffly, trying not to seem suspicious. As Roy walked further into the room, he turned to notice Robin, a little bit surprised to have found him in Lucina’s room by himself.

“Oh! Hi Robin.” Roy greeted him warmly. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“H-H-Hey!” Robin stuttered. “How- uh- how can I help you?”

“Well, I was just looking for Lucina.” Roy responded, making Robin gulp. “You see, I spent some time with Marth a little while ago, and I just felt like he was acting strangely.” Robin gulped again. “So, I figured I’d come ask the person who’s the most closely related to him and see if she knew anything about it. Would you happen to know where she is?”

“Uhhh…” Robin’s face went blank. He was so immersed in the heat of the moment that his brain couldn’t come up with any tricky tale or excuse to get him out of this situation. It was completely devoid of any thought.

Meanwhile, ‘Peach’ was laying static below the covers, her mouth still wrapped around Robin’s erect penis. She had gone along with his sudden panic and stopped there frozen in shock. But as the surprise of the situation died down, she realized there was no reason for her to remain still. Sure, there was someone else in the room with them, but she didn’t care. All that mattered to her right now was that her Robi’s erect cock was in her mouth, and she was going to satisfy it. Maybe it was because she couldn’t contain herself with such a temptation in front of her. Maybe it was because she thought that she was already hidden, so they wouldn’t get caught. Or maybe she wished to be caught, so that people would know how much she loved him. Whatever the reason, ‘Peach’ began to bob her head up and down Robin’s dick once more, any hesitation gone from her mind.

“GYAKH!” Robin yelped as he felt ‘Peach’ resume her sucking.

Roy too jumped in surprise from Robin’s sudden jolt. “Are you ok?”

“Y-y-yeaaahh!” Robin lied through his teeth. “Mayyyybe just feeling a bit under the weather?”

In reality, Robin had not been expecting for ‘Peach’ to continue her blowjob while Roy was still in the room. It was something so out of the realm of his consideration that he felt sincerely stunned that it had happened. Though that isn’t to say that he wasn’t enjoying it. In fact, he was more aroused now than he was before. There was just something very exhilarating that came from doing it in front of someone. But if there was anything Robin wanted more than to blow his load into ‘Peach’s’ lovely mouth, it was to net get his secret found out at this moment.

“Well, if you need anything, I can go ahead and get it for you.” Roy responded.

“No… Uh-” Robin’s mind twirled around aimlessly. “ACK!”

The way ‘Peach’s’ tongue swirled about in her mouth felt just absolutely magnificent to Robin. How she gently caressed his throbbing pole… How she sweetly massaged his tip as it left her mouth… How she slobbered around his width as it went in… It just felt downright heavenly, like her mouth had been designed to do this.

“REST!” As suddenly as the word came into his mind, Robin yelled it aloud. “I j-just need a b-bit of reeesssstt- Why d-don’t youuu come byyy laterr a-and we’ll talk more?”

By this point, Roy had noticed something moving underneath the sheets. He raised his eyebrow, his suspicion of something strange happening growing ever stronger. “Are you sure?” He asked, slowly inching closer and closer to Robin. “You sound like you’re in a lot of pain.”

Robin gritted his teeth. He’d become aware of Roy’s suspicion and was trying his hardest not to pay attention to the amazing pleasure that assaulted his meat. However, this growing pleasure was also growing hard to ignore. The longer ‘Peach’s’ blowjob went on, the better it felt, the pleasure becoming stronger and stronger with every passing second.

“PAIN?!” Robin shouted hazily. “er- I m-mean- Pain? Nooooo. I-I’m fiiiiiiiine.”

It was all too much to handle. ‘Peach’s’ head motions were smooth and calculated, letting her hit all his most sensitive spots. Her throat was warm, gooey and soft as it enveloped his penis. And the way her tongue tickled his privates made him shiver. These sensations all overflowed Robin’s mind and his pleasure levels were reaching peak points. Little bits of pre began dripping from his penis, it wouldn’t be long before he’d finish.

“Robin, I think there’s something underneath the covers.” Roy asserted, slowly moving his hands onto the covers.

“Wha-? No- Ah!” Robin couldn’t do anything to stop Roy at this point, he’d completely failed. He was so close to orgasm there was only one thing he could do at the moment.

With a single swipe, Roy pulled the covers off the bed and off Robin, revealing the lewd scene going underneath his nose. Robin couldn’t take it any longer and he grabbed hold of ‘Peach’s’ hair, pulling her face as close to the base of his cock as possible as he released his orgasm. His cum spewed directly into ‘Peach’s’ mouth, causing her to have an orgasm of her own and sprinkle little spouts sperm onto the bed, while she did her best to swallow as much of Robin’s yummy juice as she could. The two remained there spasming from bliss close to each other for some time. Then, as his stream of sperm died, and his orgasm wore off, Robin could finally let out a sigh of relief.

Meanwhile, Roy stared unbelieving at the strange scene that unfolded before him. There were so many things wrong with this picture that his mind couldn’t even process it clearly. He recoiled back in surprise, his face painted with shock and disgust. Was that really Marth semi-naked on Lucina’s bed having intimate relations with Robin? It seemed impossible to Roy, yet here he was, seeing it with his own eyes.

“Wha- What is going on here?” Roy commanded with severity. “Is that Marth? And w-why is there another Marth running around?”

Robin jolted upwards as he heard Roy’s exclamation. Thanks to his orgasm, he’d momentarily forgotten all about Roy. But now that his load was blown, all his mental capacities were back in action. With a swift hop, Robin jumped off the bed and confronted Roy.

“Wait, I can explain.” Robin said, a pleading look on his face. “Just-”

Reaching into his coat pocket, Robin pulled out his small compass.

“Just look at this compass for me, ok?” Robin continued. “Follow it along as I move it.”

“What?!” Roy felt a bit insulted at the request. “How will this-?”

“Shhhh” But he was interrupted by Robin before he could finish. “Just trust me? If you follow the compass, all will be explained.”

A small sigh left Roy’s mouth, as he relented to Robin’s request. Sure, why not, he thought. Just stare at the compass. That wouldn’t even be the weirdest thing that had happened to him in the last five minutes, so why not? As long as he got answers, this was fine.

The compass bobbed from left to right in front of Roy’s face. Though he followed it diligently, he didn’t really think too much about it. Instead, he thought about what the name of St. Elimine was going on right here. The only possible thing that came to mind was an affair. Which was strange, because both of them were not only married or engaged, they were also married and engaged to women. Moreover, Roy had never thought of Marth as being an unfaithful sort of man, so why was he doing this? It was all so bizarre… So unusual… So… hard to… Think…

Roy shook his head intensely, shaking the confusion away from his mind. For whatever reason, he was beginning to find it hard to focus on anything other than the compass. He had to admit, it was a very pretty compass. And the way it moved side to side was so swift… and relaxing… … But this wasn’t the time to think about that! As a friend to both Marth and somewhat Robin, he couldn’t let them continue to perform these immoral acts. He had to help in some way.

“Er- Robin.” Roy spoke up, his eyes still fixated on the compass. “I don’t really understand how watching this compass is going to-”

“Shhh, Roy.” Robin stopped him. “Don’t think about anything else, just look at the compass…”

Without moving a muscle, Roy continued watching the compass with fierce fascination. There was just something about this compass that felt special, Roy couldn’t quite wrap his finger around it. It was the only thing that occupied his mind. It was the only thing that could occupy his mind. Any other thoughts about cheating or whatever else had been evaporated in an instant, with Roy not even noticing that they were there in the first place.

“That’s right~” Robin said soothingly. “It feels really good to follow the compass doesn’t it? Just looking at it makes you feel so relaxed…”

A sigh left Roy’s mouth as his entire body relaxed. It was true, this compass made Roy feel very relaxed and cozy. By this point, all of his worries and stress were gone. He remembered being upset by something at some point, but he couldn’t really recall what it was so who cared? This pleasant aura that permeated through his body just felt so nice…

“Good~” Robin sang out. “You’re feeling very nice and relaxed right now. But the more you follow the compass, the better it feels, doesn’t it?”

Pleasure careened down Roy’s body like water down a waterfall. His legs wobbled, barely able to keep him standing through the relaxation he was experiencing. Roy just couldn’t believe how pleasant this all was. The world around him disappeared, it was now just him and the compass, enjoying a pleasant time unperturbed by anything else.

“Ver good!” Robin praised him. “Now, I’m going to count down to from three to zero, and every time I count down, you’ll feel even better and more relaxed than before. Then, when I get to zero, you’ll enter a trance where you’ll follow every command I give you. Alright?”

Roy nodded eagerly. He didn’t really understand any of that command stuff, but he did want to feel even better than he was feeling right now. So, doing as Robin said was a no brainer.

“Three.”

His mind fogged up incredibly, all thoughts being pushed deep into Roy’s subconscious. He no longer desired anything. He could no longer desire anything. Everything he did now was left up to instinct, unable to willingly act of his own volition.

“Two.”

Sensations most parts of his body disappeared. Even if Roy wanted to at this point, he couldn’t physically move a single muscle of his body. No, the only thing that remained from Roy was the pleasant glow of relaxation that he felt in his mind.

“One.”

The waves of pleasantness and relaxation that attacked Roy’s being became too much. His body crumbled under its weight, making slowly fall onto his knees. His mind was overloaded with wonderful feelings, throbbing wildly as they struggled to stay in. The whole experience was overwhelming. There was nothing left in Roy but relaxation.

“Zero.”

Then in an instant, everything stopped. All of Roy’s feelings, thoughts and desires disappeared. Nothing was left of the boy but an empty shell, solemnly kneeling in front of Robin with eyes closed as he waited patiently for whatever it was that Robin had planned for him.

“Wow Robi, you’re so amazing! You’re so good at doing that, aren’t you?” Peach exclaimed, making Robin smirk with a sense of pride.

But setting Robin’s cool abilities aside, he had a job to do. With Roy ready to receive orders, he’d just make him forget what he saw right here and make him ignore all the Marth stuff. Easy peasy.

“Ok, Roy. From now on you will believe yourself to be Princess Daisy.” Robin surprised himself as the words came out of his mouth. He knew that deep down he really didn’t want to do something as boring as just making Roy forget about everything, but he didn’t expect himself to give into his desires without any struggle. Sure, it was wrong, but at this point he’d done it so much that it just felt second nature.

“You will act and think exactly the way she does.” He continued. “Except you will also be extremely attracted to me. Whenever we are together, you will want to do nothing but please me sexually, and you will be eager to do whatever it takes to make me feel good.”

“W-Wait a second!” ‘Peach’ rang out with worry. “You can’t do this Robi! Now that Lucina is gone, I’m your only lover, and it should stay that way. I love you more than anything in the world, and I know how to please you better than anyone. So please! I couldn’t bear to have share you with somebody else”

Robin let out a sigh. He didn’t expect ‘Peach’ to get so upset about it. Of course, he cared about what she thought, yet at the same time, he had no intention of letting her wishes overcome his desires. Thus, the solution was quite obvious. Without a second thought, Robin snapped his fingers, and ‘Peach’ went into the same trance Roy was in.

“Alright, I guess this one goes for both of you.” Robin said. “Both of you are now going to be part of my harem. You are going to love each other very much, and you are not going to fight or get jealous with each other over who I want to fuck or who I like best. Moreover, you will both also be very excited when I add more people to my harem, and you’ll actively enjoy when I make others join it. Now, when I snap my fingers, you’ll both wake up and follow the instructions I have given you. Then, whenever I snap my finger again, you will once more enter the state of trance and be ready for further instructions.”

Satisfied with his orders, Robin let his fingers snap, the crackle resounding loudly throughout the room. Roy and ‘Peach’ slowly shook their heads as they began to take in their surroundings. Robin extended his hand towards the kneeling Roy, a devious smile on his face. As soon as he noticed the hand, Roy looked upon Robin with confusion. But before long a rough looking smile appeared on his face.

“So, how are you feeling… Princess ‘Daisy’?” Robin asked, helping ‘Daisy’ onto her feet.

“Oh, I’m doing awesome.” ‘Daisy’ responded, staring wide eyed at Robin. “And I can see you’re doing pretty well yourself.” She said, lustily grabbing hold of Robin’s erect penis.

“Very well, ‘Daisy’. How about you change into something more comfortable, and we can have some fun?” Robin whispered smoothly, caressing her chin.

‘Daisy’ looked down at her clothes in confusion, only to be frozen in shock as she realized she wasn’t wearing her usual dress. “What is all this armor?!” She shouted, distraught. “I’m sorry Robin. I didn’t realize I was wearing this crap. Let me just go to my room and change into something prettier, ok?”

With that, ‘Daisy’ sprinted from the room and out the door. “Don’t start without me!” They could hear her yell as she left. Robin gave a proud sigh, content about another job well done. Then, without warning, ‘Peach’ jumped onto him, kissing and caressing him passionately.

“Oh Robi, this is so wonderful. I’m so very happy you’ve decided to add Roy to our love circle.” She praised him. “And the hypnosis thing was so hot too… Oh my, I’m so excited right now…”

Robin smiled. He was very excited to try his new toy as well…

Before long, a loud knock came from out the other side of the door. Robin and ‘Peach’ flared up in enthusiasm, both eager to see Princess ‘Daisy’s’ new feminine look. Then, as the door slowly began to slide open, she finally stepped in. Robin’s and ‘Peach’s’ jaws dropped, awe struck from her incredible transformation.

Now, instead of wearing Roy’s old bulky ugly armor, Princess ‘Daisy’ was donning her signature frilly orange dress with its large round hem reaching the floor and flowery designs adorning it all over. Her hair was styled in its usual orderly and refined fashion despite its shortness, instead of Roy’s usual natural and messy look. And with her usual crown on her head, parasol in hand, and even beautiful makeup on her face, one could be easily forgiven for thinking that this was Princess Daisy and not a Pharean prince.

Noticing the way the two were staring at her, ‘Daisy’ strutted sexily closer into the room. She walked with elegance, exaggerating her motions to emphasize her assets. As she stepped in front of Robin, she stopped and placed her hand on his chin, a lustful smile plastered on her face.

“Like what you see?” She asked seductively.

It was a redundant question. The hardened erection coming from Robin said so. Nevertheless, she still wished to hear him say that he did with his own words.

“Of course, darling.” Robin responded, coming closer to ‘Daisy’. “The only thing is I think you might be a bit overdressed.”

‘Daisy’ looked over at Robin, who was entirely pant less, and ‘Peach’, who was only wearing her lingerie. He did make a great point. Even though a part of her wanted him to compliment her more on her looks and attire, another part of her was ready and thirsty for the wild amounts of sex they would partake in. It didn’t matter how long it took to put this dress on or pretty her face up with makeup, her penis became hardened at the thought of having intercourse with Robin.

Stepping away from Robin, ‘Daisy’ began the slow process of undressing. She stripped herself bit by bit, meticulously removing pieces of her dress in a way that would both look attractive and also keep the looks of the clothes pristine, until she was left with barely anything on. Only her corset and a short underskirt remained, as well as orange high heels and her long yellow stockings with garter belts. Her gloves and other accessories stayed too, with her panties barely able to contain her massive erection. Robin felt a bit awed at its size. It was definitely bigger than Marth’s and was almost on par with Robin’s, which was impressive for a boy of his age.

But what really caught Robin’s attention was the pair of large round breast forms glued onto ‘Daisy’s’ chest. A part of Robin was really curious as to where ‘Daisy’ would have acquired them. Were they from the real Daisy, or from someone she knows, or maybe they were from Roy himself. But it honestly didn’t matter, because they looked amazing. Much better than ‘Peach’s’ balloon tits. It made him kind of wonder how they would feel…

“You’re staring really hard at them. Wanna try them out?” ‘Daisy’ asked him, squeezing her breasts together.

Robin smirked. “Absolutely.”

With a smile on her face, ‘Daisy’ knelt down in front of Robin, her chest inches away from his throbbing pole. Grasping her breasts firmly, she gently encased Robin’s manhood in between her two large pads, as she began to rock her body up and down. She heaved herself boldly and mildly, with both the meticulousness of a princess and the fire of a tomboy, a stark contrast from Peach, who was usually more refined and calmer.

Nevertheless, Robin quite enjoyed it. Her breasts were large enough that his penis snugly fit in between them, and even though the were a bit rubbery and colder than normal breasts, they still felt soft enough to be enjoyable. But that wasn’t even the part Robin liked the most. No, what really got him going was how eager and excited ‘Daisy’ was to please him. The way she moved her body so brashly and intensely just to pleasure him was so intoxicating. And how she stared at his penis with eyes of pure desire, kissing and licking its tip when it poked through her cleavage as if it was the only thing she cared about… It made his cock spark up with life.

Meanwhile, ‘Peach’ sat on top of Lucina’s bed, jacking off her little dick while she watched Robin and ‘Daisy’. A little bit of her was jealous of the whole situation. Robin had never asked her for a titjob, and the two seemed so happy doing it that it made ‘Peach’ wish she was in ‘Daisy’s’ place. But more than jealous, she was very aroused. Her penis pulsated mightily along with Robin’s, as if they were deeply connected somehow. And seeing her Robi have such a good time with her good friend- er- Roy pretending to be her good friend ‘Daisy’ was so sexy! Gosh, it made her feel so good!

By this point, Robin was thrusting his hips in conjunction to ‘Daisy’s’ body movements. The breasts might’ve been fake, but the sensations he was feeling were very real. He had been truly enraptured by the moment, happily enjoying all the carnal pleasures that surrounded him. But now his penis was reaching its limit, and it was ready to blow at any second.

“OH GODS! I’M GOING TO CUM!” Robin yelled, trying to warn ‘Daisy’ of the impending explosion.

Then, just as he said, Robin’s dick began blasting rope after rope of thick cum right onto ‘Daisy’s’ unsuspecting face. The moment she realized what was happening, she closed her eyes and eagerly opened her mouth, trying to catch all of Robin’s yummy seed in her mouth. On the other side of the room, Princess ‘Peach’ also yelped loudly as her tiny penis spewed globs of semen onto the floor.

As the stream of sperm finally died, Robin felt his body relax. ‘Daisy’ cleaned the rest of her face of his cum, taking the little droplets into her hand and then drinking them all. She swished his seed around in her mouth, savoring the taste and texture of his sweet juice as much as she could until she had to swallow. Robin for his part, closed his eyes and leaned back against the nearest wall. A happy gasp escaped through his mouth. He was such an amazing genius…

“Oh Robin~” A voice boomed through the room. “Don’t tell me that’s all you have.”

Opening his eyes, Robin quickly turned towards the source of the voice. There, next to the bed, was ‘Daisy’, hands planted firmly on the mattress with her bare ass sticking up and her twitching butthole pointing at Robin.

“Why don’t you come over here, so we can have some more fun?” She said, wiggling her butt seductively.

A smile formed on Robin’s face, his penis hardening at the precious sight of ‘Daisy’s’ bouncing bottom. It wasn’t the roundest butt he’d seen but combined with her sultry attitude it was enough to make his dick eager and ready for some more sexual action. Slowly he began to approach ‘Daisy’s’, making her shiver in excitement.

As he arrived before her, he placed his hands firmly on her asscheeks. He grasped them tightly, kneading and grappling them as he pleased. The reality was that these buns were indeed his property. He could do whatever he wanted with them, and that fact alone pleased him. Soon he moved on to ‘Daisy’s’ asshole, pushing the tip of his cock against the rim of her butt. He poked and prodded her without second thought, teasing the girl endlessly. Her lustful moans were so succulent, the need in her voice so gratifying. The power Robin held over her just made him feel so enthralled, for no matter how much she wanted him, he was the one in control.

Nevertheless, Robin did not plan to tease ‘Daisy’ forever. Yes, it was fun to hear her whimpers every time he placed his hot throbbing meat close to her hole, but he had more than that planned at the moment. He was now going to use his cock to make ‘Daisy’ into his bitch. Arching himself back, he carefully pointed his penis towards ‘Daisy’s’ hungering entrance. Then, with a single thrust, Robin penetrated her butthole, making ‘Daisy’ squeal in joy as her virgin cavern was finally filled.

Robin groaned loudly as the walls of her ass squeezed down on his dick. They were tight, really tight. Even tighter than ‘Peach’s’. to the point that it was downright uncomfortable. It made sense if you thought about it, it was the ass of a virgin growing boy, but it still caught Robin by surprise. However, this little setback wasn’t going to deter Robin a single bit. In fact, maybe this was a blessing in disguise. What would be a better way to mark ‘Daisy’ as his property than to mold her unadulterated asshole into the shape of his cock? Thus, with the power of determination, he began to pump his dick in and out of her hole.

On her end, ‘Daisy’ was thoroughly enjoying herself. The man of her dreams was currently ravaging her asshole, and that alone was enough to make her penis throb with excitement. It didn’t matter that she was feeling a bit of pain in her behind, Robin was pounding her with such ferocity that it was enough to keep her going, for as long as he was happy, she was happy. Besides, after some time of him thrusting and thrusting, it was actually starting to feel really good back there…

Slap after slap echoed throughout the room as Robin continued to mesh his skin against ‘Daisy’s’. And now, whether it was due to his efforts or because ‘Daisy’ had relaxed, her hole was feeling much better. Even if it wasn’t as good as ‘Peach’s’, it still felt fantastic when the rough bumps of her interior rubbed lightly with every motion against the length of his dong.

On the other side of the room, ‘Peach’ watched the scene with her eyes wide open. Robin was just completely dominating ‘Daisy’ with his cock alone! And it was the hottest thing she’d ever seen in her life. Her hands rubbed her little dick up and down as if her life depended on it. ‘Peach’ never would have thought that she would be so aroused from seeing Robin fuck someone else, especially if that someone else was a hypnotized crossdressing boy. Yet here she was, her dick ready to burst just from watching this action. If only she had some cock available this would be great… That’s when she noticed ‘Daisy’s’ dick flopping about underneath her. She licked her lips lustfully. Yes, that would do.

‘Daisy’ moaned loudly as Robin repeatedly penetrated her insides. Robin was really going at it now. Rather than having the forceful demeanor he possessed before, it now felt more animalistic and hungrier, as if he couldn’t stop himself from pounding with all his might. And by golly did it feel amazing. ‘Daisy’ could feel her prick shiver with delight from Robin’s continuous thrusts. Her spine tingled every time his cock rubbed against her prostate. Her body and mind were filled with such a thick miasma of lust and pleasure that it felt as if she was floating in heaven. So much so that she didn’t notice as ‘Peach’ crawled underneath her, desire burning in her eyes as she stared down ‘Daisy’s pole.

Stopping right beneath ‘Daisy’, ‘Peach’ stared at the hypnotized princess’ dangling dick with longing in her eyes. Her cock looked so delectable at the moment that ‘Peach’ began unwittingly drooling as she admired it. It was so thick and juicy… Actually, it looked a little bit like Robin’s. The thought alone made ‘Peach’s’ little penis harden even more. She just absolutely needed to get a taste of it! Without any hesitation, ‘Peach’ opened her mouth and darted towards ‘Daisy’s’ cock.

A loud groan escaped ‘Daisy’s’ mouth as she experienced some utterly unexpected sensations assaulting her cock. She quickly turned down to see what had happened, only to be met with the back of ‘Peach’s’ moving eagerly along with various slurping noises.

“P-p-p-peach!” She stuttered. “What are you doooOOOOUGHHH~~”

But at that moment she realized what ‘Peach’ was doing. The warm wetness she felt encasing her cock was a dead giveaway. It was something that ‘Daisy’ had never experienced before. The way ‘Peach’ mixed the movement of her throat around her dick and the flickering of her tongue inside her mouth felt extremely pleasurable to ‘Daisy’, it showed her how great ‘Peach’ was at this. But the combination of this and Robin’s intense thrusting were proving to be a bit too much for her to handle. ‘Daisy’s’ world began spinning in circles, the pleasurable sensations that assaulted her mind were so harsh she was having a tough time discerning left from right. Surely, her mind wouldn’t last too much longer.

Suddenly, Robin unintentionally let out a loud groan. For some reason, ‘Daisy’s’ hole had tightened considerably. However, unlike when he first penetrated her, it didn’t feel uncomfortable at all. In fact, if felt kind of pleasant. After pounding her butthole restlessly for some time, he’d widened it a fair amount, so having it contract once more against his dick felt really nice. Plus, he’d been going at her ass for so long that his penis was starting to reach its peak point of pleasure.

With his balls filling to their maximum capacity, Robin began trusting his hips as hard as he could into ‘Daisy’. He only had a few more moments to enjoy her succulent cavern and god damn it he was going to enjoy them. ‘Daisy’ on her part felt as if she was about to explode. The vicious attacks of pleasure that had been orchestrated on her mind were so severe that she couldn’t think of anything but release. Her entire body yearned for it, her dick throbbing madly as her cock prepared for the final blow.

Then, in a chorus of mad lust and pleasure, the three of them sang out in harmony as orgasm washed over all of them. Robin grunted harshly, releasing waves upon waves of his sperm as he plunged his cock to the depths of ‘Daisy’s ass. ‘Daisy’s’ entire body spasmed in bliss as her hole was filled with gallons of Robin’s seed, whilst her own cock trembled as it spouted its own fluid into ‘Peach’s’ mouth. As for ‘Peach’, she merely sat in a state of dazed joy as cum flowed through her mouth, her penis sputtering tiny ropes of cum onto the cold floor.

The three remained this way for some time, trying to savor the sweet afterglow of orgasm for as long as they could. Then Robin slowly pulled his flaccid cock out of ‘Daisy’s’ butt, looking with pride at the gaping hole dripping with his sperm. ‘Peach’ licked every single droplet of sperm of ‘Daisy’s dick, tasting it carefully in order to see if it was better than Robin’s sperm (It wasn’t). And ‘Daisy… She remained in her position frozen for some time, as if her body was still trying to comprehend what had just happened. However, she eventually just plopped on top of the bed, collapsing in exhaustion after all the sensations she went through. Robin and ‘Peach’ looked upon the tuckered-out princess with warmth. It was so cute how she’d just fallen asleep right after having sex. Nevertheless, after the tiring day both had, they happily decided to join her.

Robin laid down comfortably on Lucina’s bed. With a satisfied smile on his face, and a princess resting peacefully at each of his sides, he let out a fulfilled sigh. It wasn’t always that he’d felt as much inner peace as he felt currently, with everything that happened in Yllisse and then all the fighting he had to participate in now. But at this moment, he truly felt as if all was well in his life.

“Hey, Robi…” Hearing the sudden whisper, Robin turned to his left towards ‘Peach’ who nuzzled gently against him.

“I will say… I was very surprised you picked Roy.” She continued. “I never thought you’d- um- you know… Swing that way.”

Bewilderment spread onto Robin’s face. “Sw-swing that way? What do you mean?”

“Oh, don’t be silly Robi.” ‘Peach’ responded matter-of-factly. “You picked a man for your harem. I just didn’t think you’d be gay, that’s all.“

“I-I-I’M NOT GAY!” Robin yelled defensively, making ‘Daisy’ shift in her sleep next to him. “Er- I’m not gay.”

“Really?” ‘Peach’ said incredulously. “You just had sexual relationships with Roy. Who’s a guy. And you did him hard. Super hard. What would you call tha-?”

“Yeah, but he’s in a dress!” Robin interrupted her.

“Yeah, but he also has a penis.” ‘Peach’ quickly retorted.

Silence filled the room, as Robin thought very deeply over ‘Peach’s’ statements.

“Anyways… Even if you are, you can’t be that gay. After all, you did have sex with me and I’m a woman so…” She snuggled closely to his chest, closing her eyes. “Goodnight.”

As the two princesses left the real world to enter dreamland, Robin’s eyes remained wide open. ‘Peach’s’ words echoed loudly in in his head, repeating themselves over and over again. He kept trying to come up with arguments to rationalize his actions, but in the end they all lead to the same road. That night, Robin could not get a wink of sleep.

Alright, finally here it is. After two long months of hard work, I’ve finally finished the story for my 100 follower contest, the sequel for The Hypnosis of Princess M̶a̶r̶t̶h̶ Peach.Thank you for your patience while waiting for me to finish this, and thanks to all that have been following and supporting my work thus far. With Fall break coming up soon, I’ll try to get another story done this month. And once Winter break starts, then I’ll really be able to get back into writing. I’m probably even going to start requests back up again. Anyways, like the last one, this story is based on some drawings made by @sealguy like this and this. His stuff is really good so go check it out! As for this story, I might’ve gone a bit overboard with this one. I think this is the longest ‘chapter’ or single story I’ve written. And even though I think I might’ve not put enough lewd stuff in it, I hope you still enjoyed it nonetheless! Cheers! And until next time!

#super smash bros #fire emblem #mario bros #robin fire emblem #marth fire emblem #lucina fire emblem #roy fire emblem #princess peach #princess daisy #sealguy #hypnosis #trap #gay #male on male

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ihavetotellher · 3 years ago

Text

December 20th, 2019 - 02:02

Dear S.,

I think there is a certain freedom in living through your worst fears. There’s nothing else to be scared of.

I used to be so scared of getting involved with men and having sex with them. Then I got sexually assaulted by my best friend after an emergency -labiaplasty- , which basically answers the question “what could possibly go wrong?”. Sexual assault still feels like such a heavy word choice for what happened. But what else could be called a man moving your stiff, paralized body around, to force a penis into it? I just can’t find a better definition. You know that instagram “Why I Didn’t Report”? One of their posts says “Because I didn’t know I was a victim until I started working at a crisis center in college 9 years later”. I hated reading this. I can’t not cry reading this. Because I guess I would have to say “Because I didn’t know I was a victim until I had a mandatory consent workshop in college 5 years later”. I hate writing the word victim, I don’t feel like one. Is that victim talk too?

I used to be scared of not having a relationship. Of not being loved or not being enough to people. And look at me. There’s always someone better out there that people can and will go for. I am never the choice. I don’t know exactly what happens but apparently I am great; there’s just that other person who is greater. It’s like forever being Rafael’s sister in Jane the Virgin. I’ve never finished, but I’ll never forget that last picture of everyone together, paired up, and his sister at the right end, being a third wheel in a gay couple. Which is basically what 2020 has to offer me. A. will get here and I will just have to find a way of acting normal around you two. You will be in heaven and I’ll be happy for you, watching everything like a freaky voyer. It’s gonna be ‘great’.

I feel the last time I was someone’s choice was in 9th grade and I fucked that up by being scared. That’s some really well developed destiny’s plot twist. He’s happy now. He has relationships. I’m still here, where we were left at, 11 years ago. Never healed, only even more fucked up.

I used to be scared of not achieving my goals. And again, look at me. Apparently, the only thing I can do is to be a waitress. I don’t like working on sets. I don’t like the hierarchy, I think is bulshit to have a college student and former lawyer as a volunteer PA to clean dirty from plastic rugs. Call me whatever the fuck you want, but I payed almost $100K dollars to network with spoiled childreen and be a volunteer cleaning lady on sets (again, for free!) and that makes me wanna drop a nuclear bomb in the whole capitalistic system.

Nobody trusts me to get along in a project. Either people don’t give a shit to what I have to say or they don’t even consider working with me because, what, I’m not a friend!? (or friendly?). And I think not even you would get on board too, which ultimately is your inner self not having faith in me. But honestly why would you right? I know we are at very different levels, you have been doing this artsy thing for a while now, while my first attempt ever was 15 months ago. You have A. as your pair to create and while I don’t think you’re looking for anyone else, I can’t stop to lean on you. You were the first, and only, person I’ve ever found who I really felt connected to. But also it just feels like you are already taken in all the aspects you could possibly be, and there’s no more opening for anyone or anything else in your life. At the end, everything in you seems to resume into creating life, art and a future only with A.

I mean, this being a healthy choice or not, I can’t say anything about it because I know I would do exactly the same, if I had a chance, with you. And that has always been my ultimate fear. To spend my life without having someone to do that with. To share life. Which is already happening. I’m already living with no one around, not even you. I think that was the worst part of this mental breakdown during these last months, realizing the platonic relationship I was building with you because rationaly I know nothing else could be possible. I am temporarily filling an emotional role for you while for me you are everything. And it’s not because I was heartbroken by someone else before, or because I’m projecting things on you, or because I want a relationship like yours. It has nothing to do with anything besides me wanting to share my life with you, every minute of every day, for as long as my body allows me. It’s about me wanting to make my life purpose your happiness because that will also be my happiness. It’s about wanting to surprise you and treat you as the most important person in this world, like the only-daughter treatment you never had but always deserved. It’s about me wanting to not have sex for the first time in my life, but to make love with you every single day because somehow you grew to be the sexiest human being alive in my planet. It’s about wanting to marry you even though I’ve never wanted to marry anyone before, because you create this desire for a lifetime commitment in my heart. It’s about cooking for you and with you, amazing bon appetit feasts for our families where my mom would talk in spanish thinking she’s nailing it while your mom wouldn’t understand shit. It’s about having children with you, if you want to, because even though the world can’t take any more people in it, it also can't not know how you would grow to be the best mom to walk this planet and I would want to watch that sitcom every day, for the rest of my life. It’s about fighting with you and making up with poetry. It’s about being by your side at all moments because I want to help, to watch, to learn. It’s about loving someone in ways I never thought it was possible while I’m still amazed to have this somewhere inside of me every time I think about you. And because of all of that, this has been the worst possible second place I have ever been in my life. Somehow I feel that as long as I live, your heart will be the only first place it will ever matter to me. Making me forever a loser.

I have nothing to fear anymore. I went through sexual and psychological violence, a genital plastic surgery, the complete emotional father rejection besides the overall social and romantic rejection by strangers through every attempt of a relationship, the multiple failor in different careers, from technical to artistic, besides the continuity of that failor and, worse than the loss of something I once had, the complete impossibility and instant dismissal of romantic love from the one person that, in some surreal magical way, will always matters the most in my world.

But inside my head there’s a whole universe that lives from dreams. It’s the only comforting place I’ve ever had, where the impossible happens every night and somehow you choose me. And maybe, in my personalized fairytale, if you take the depressive crap out of it, this could be the vows I’d write to you.

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liuwdere · 8 years ago

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the gay ass anime masterpost*

*not actually a masterpost, since i give about two and a half fucks about keeping this updated or properly categorized. real loose classifications to follow. shit i haven’t seen in italics; stuff i’d highly recommend in bold. now updated w/ streaming links (some are US-only tho, sorry)

no predatory lesbians or okama joke characters or else we’ll be here all day. k? k.

LGBT-THEMED: anime that directly addresses LGBT identity as one of its primary focuses

Revolutionary Girl Utena

the ez one

Yurikuma Arashi

Class S is bullshit, did u know that. Also, thirsty-ass bear girls and a real angry takedown of the patriarchy

Flip Flappers

I don’t know how you can read this show as anything but lesbian sexual awakening, especially given the Class S Yuri Hell episode

Wandering Son (Hourou Musuko)

pls pay attention to the T friends

Aoi Hana (Sweet Blue Flowers)

Showa Genroku Rakugo Shinju

Kikuhiko is def not cishet and i will fite u if u insist otherwise. Half the show’s choices make no sense without that lens

Yuri!!! on Ice

fite me

LGBT-THEMED; LIMITED REP: anime that addresses gender or sexuality as a secondary focus, though perhaps lacking explicit representation (e.g. LGBT narratives in the secondary cast).

The Woman Called Fujiko Mine (from the director of Yuri!!! on Ice)

One of the supporting characters is a gay man struggling w/ masculinity

Gay schoolgirl episode all about female sexual repression

did i mention the titty is good

Princess Jellyfish

Prominent focus on gender presentation

Kuranosuke can be read as a closeted trans woman

Paradise Kiss

Heroine’s love interest is bisexual

Trans woman in the supporting cast; trans identity plays a major role in her story

Ouran High School Host Club

Discusses gender + gender presentation, though protagonist isn’t explicitly stated to be nonbinary

Protagonist’s parents implied to be genderqueer; father definitely bi

Plenty of gay subtext among the male cast

Scum’s Wish

Strong focus on female sexuality; main character is bisexual

Central cast also includes a lesbian

Simoun

Discusses gender as more of an abstraction? Takes place in a world where everyone is born female to later choose a permanent gender. It does less to directly address gender than you’d expect, though, which is why I’m sticking it here

From the New World (Shin Sekai Yori)

Future dystopia where societal norms practically mandate bisexuality. Honestly, I dunno where to put this; the story’s more concerned with sexuality in general than with LGBT identity

Devilman Crybaby

Classic characters reinterpreted through a queer lens; important theme of coming to terms with one’s own sexuality and identity. Ryo is the definition of disaster gay

LGBT REP: anime w/ positive depictions of LGBT characters, though not necessarily concerned w/ addressing queerness directly.

Samurai Flamenco

Four words: gay naked gunpoint proposal. the show makes about that much sense but it’s a lotta fun

i don’t care what the director said

bisexual girl in a poly relationship

No. 6

boys kissing tho???

Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid

pls ignore the manga and its magic dick nonsense

Haruchika

One of the two leads is a gay boy. He explicitly says so in the first episode. Avoid the live-action movie like the plague.

I should probably list Kase-san and Bloom Into You here

Mikagura School Suite

The heroine is REALLY THIRSTY for all the cute girls

Gankutsuou: The Count of Monte Cristo

Beyond the obvious homoerotic overtones of Albert/the Count, there’s Franz’s gay crush

Sympathetic trans girl character in the secondary cast

Michiko and Hatchin (from the director of Yuri!!! on Ice!!!)

Girls are good ok

Atsuko is gay

Macross Delta

two girls in the supporting cast do a hell of a lotta cuddling on screen

some versions of Sailor Moon

namely the ‘90s anime

Sailor Moon Crystal and the manga do address gender in… questionable ways

Tokyo Godfathers

Trans woman in the main cast

Tiger and Bunny

Reasonably respectful portrayal of a gay man once it gets going

Central relationship between two men could be read as romantic

Genshiken

Whispered Words (Sasameki Koto)

Psycho-Pass

One of the officers is a lesbian. She gets a focus episode

Monogatari series

Really just limited to Kanbaru, but she’s the most accurate depiction of the constantly horny dank meme problematic gay (e.g. me) i’ve ever seen, ironic propositioning of her straight dude friend and all. The rest of the franchise is obnoxious though, so ymmv

Kill la Kill?

i don’t know how else you interpret one girl kissing another on the mouth

Attack on Titan

If you’ve been living under a rock and somehow haven’t heard about it Ymir and Christa are all but explicitly stated to be in love with each other

Kino’s Journey

Kino asks people to use non-gendered pronouns, apparently? I haven’t seen this yet.

Knights of Sidonia

Non-binary character in the main cast

The manga goes some iffy places with their character tho, be warned

Really though, I mostly like this show for the sentient pink penis alien

Gatchaman Crowds

Several gender non-conforming characters

Trans girl in the main cast

Cardcaptor Sakura?

Fuuka

One of the dudes is canonically gay, not that it makes much of an improvement to the show

A Centaur’s Life

there’s a moment where a lesbian objects to her PDA being considered more obscene than the straight equivalent, which is nice but pretty off-the-cuff

Rose of Versailles

Oscar’s debatably genderqueer, though the show goes some real questionable places towards the end

Gay ladies?

Hunter x Hunter

Trans girl in the supporting cast. Her story’s extremely minor in the grand scheme of things but it’s there and it’s good

Love and Lies

potato-kun gets a harem that includes his male best friend

Land of the Lustrous

non-gendered rock people searching for meaning in life

Bodacious Space Pirates

via @madscientist212: “two explicitly lesbian characters who are lovers, and one of the story arcs involves the crew helping one of them avoid being forced into an arranged marriage to a dude by her uncle”

Banana Fish

Extremely dated BL-flavored crime drama; unfortunately falls into the pitfalls of old-ass exploitation films: csa, sexual assault, etc. It’s such a problematic fav tho

Kiss Him, Not Me

Reverse harem includes a lesbian

Double Decker! Doug & Kirill

heavy gay subtext between leads and secondary cast members; well-intentioned trans representation that’s... kinda clumsy, tbh

Zombie Land Saga

one of the zombie girls is a trans girl who dies from the shock of puberty. it’s p incidental to her character but the show’s real cute otherwise so go for it

Anima Yell

apparently one of the girls admits to having a crush on a female teacher. or something. idk this show looks hella boring why bother

THE SUBTEXT IS STRONK: not textually gay (some you could argue could fall under category #2 and vice versa; not the point of this post) but can be read that way, even though these shows aren’t super concerned w/ romance in general

Puella Magi Madoka Magica

Neon Genesis Evangelion?

Depending on the version, Shinji’s sexuality can be read a variety of ways. Manga Shinji is pretty clearly bi; TV anime Shinji you could debate.

Free, I guess

Love Live (Sunshine esp.) if I’m counting Free

Symphogear

Dear Brother (Oniisama e, otherwise known as BE STRONG)

Kids on the Slope (Sakamichi no Apollon)

Nominally they’re straight and pining for the same girl but BOY do Kaoru and Sentarou have a LOT of chemistry with each other, so much that it’s hard to read them otherwise

Marimite (Maria Watches Over Us)

Izetta: The Last Thing I Would Watch Even If I Had a Gun Pointed at My Head

Despite what you may have heard, this show is bad and 100% plays in bait territory. Also, obnoxious gun fetishism and way. too. much. goddamn. phallic imagery.

Tanaka-kun is Always Listless

Umamusume: Pretty Derby

Princess Principal

Spiritpact

I have complicated feelings about this goddamn trash fire of a show, but halfway through the second season it turns into a genuinely compelling gay pseudo-romance (?) about two boys navigating heteronormativity. also i guess the main couple exists, tho they spend a ridiculous amount of effort no-homoing

Amanchu

basically any sports anime ever tbh

Golden Kamuy

MADE FOR THE STRAIGHTS BUT STILL OK: the yuri, BL, etc. that’s clearly targeted at a heterosexual audience but respectful enough to be enjoyable for the people they’re about

Doukyuusei

This Boy Caught a Merman

This Boy is a Professional Wizard

Strawberry Panic

Love Stage??? I have some qualms about putting this here but of the trashy BL anime that exist this is probably the least offensive

Maria-Holic

TEXTUALLY GAY BUT BLUGHHHH: the yuri and BL that just sux

Sakura Trick

Junjou Romantica (how the hell does this thing have three seasons)

Sekaiichi Hatsukoi

Gakuen Heaven

Dramatical Murder (POTATO DOGGO)

Super Lovers UGH

idk Gravitation and all that other crappy BL I don’t have the patience to list

GIMME THE TRASH NOW: problematic as all hell but i sure ain’t complainin b/c i’m gay ass trash

Netsuzou Trap (NTR)

Riddle Story of Devil

Love to Lie Angle

if you ever wanted a generic ass harem comedy except with a potato girl instead of a potato guy, here’s that compressed into 3 minutes

Citrus

Corpse Party wwww

Gakuen Handsome FITE ME

NOT TOUCHING THIS HORNET’S NEST WITH A TEN FOOT POLE: pls,,,, save me from the Disk Horse

Sound! Euphonium

One of these days I might organize this a lil better. Maybe if/when Tumblr figures out how to make editing not a pain in the ass

#gay shit #long post

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tachibubu · 8 years ago

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Jealousy [REQUESTED]

Pairing: Jerome Valeska x Reader x Platonic! Deadpool

AU: HISHE-Villain Pub and Super Café

Prompt: [ANON] How about a female reader making Jerome jealous because he's been sweet talking other girls. You can pick how it ends :D - Anon

I’M SORRY THAT I JUST FINISHED IT NOW ANON, I WAS BUSY YESTERDAY AND TOTALLY FORGOT TO FINISH THIS REQUEST ;-; Hope you like it though, also if you guys say that Deadpool isn’t a villain you’re half right, he is an anti-hero that means he is in between. That includes the explanation to Punisher too! ^^

You rolled your eyes at how casually your boyfriend, Jerome Valeska is seducing with the waitress who just gave a giddy smile in return. You and your partner Jerome, where at the secluded hideout that one of largest company made, Villain Pub. Unoriginal the name is but believe me the pub is like heaven. The pub was made by the HISHE Company, who established the Super Café where all the heroes hang out ironically. Mostly the Bat and the Man of Steel. Unlike the café, which was publicly open, the pub opens between midnight to three am and was hidden well and requires an identification for all that wants to enter the pub.

You pouted; Jerome was clearly not giving his attention enough for you. Your phone rang as it sang ‘Purple Lamborghini’, you excused yourself but Jerome and the waitress didn’t seem to bother. You groaned and continue on walking away towards the side of the entrance, that’s where a little amount of people crowd in. If you thought the C.R. is the best choice then you might encounter some wild villains getting points with the opposite sex.

You swiped to respond and greeted, “Hello?”

“Boo!” you heard a boisterous shout behind your back as you grumbled in annoyment. It was the one and only Deadpool giggling at his little josh while ending the call, beside him was The Punisher----

“Yeah, yeah Author. Try to shut up, I’m trying to make a move with Mrs. Valeska here and I cannot focus with you narrating and shit!” Okay Deadpool this is for the views all right, it’s not my fault that I just want to write some stuff with you in it. I can’t find the right Villain to make up with the reader so I chose an antihero like you! Now shut up and let me continue my business.

“I would rather not be called with that surname right now.” The man was rubbernecking at you weirdly as you pointed at the flirty Jerome and the love-struck waitress. He simpered under his mask, “I have a plan.”

You took interest at what he aforesaid and smirked, “I love how you think Wilson.” winking at him. The Punisher nictate and gazes at the male and female, shifting once in a while. “I don’t want to be part of this, now if you mind. I’ll just take a shot with El Diablo and Deadshot.”

Deadpool mewl at the answer of the male, “Awe men~ I was wishing a threesome but I respect your choice brother, go get some gay sex! I’m proud of you!”

The Punisher just snarled and took steps towards the bar. “So the plan is to make Jerome jealous I assumed,” you smirked, your device on hand. Deadpool puts his hand on his waist and took in the sights, “Why yes baby girl, and here’s the plan.”

Jerome was about to ask the attractive woman’s number when he took notice on how you just vanished unexpectedly. “As much as I love to talk more, gorgeous. But my date has seem to fled and I need to be a gentleman and find her.” He stood, his voice alluring the female to want more. “Alright Mr. J,” she slipped a tissue paper with her name on it and her number “Talk to me when you ditch the bitch.” Jerome took offence to this; no one can persecute his girl other than him. “I almost took that option but it seems,” he then proceeded to rip off the tissue in bits and lob it into the air “That you’re no better, just a slut.” He smiled while biting his lip and left the table behind while waitress stared at him in shock and embarrassment, his hand up waving away while he continued walking.

“Toodles~”

He paced around the pub, trying to find you. Nodding to some acquaintance and even some of the older Jokers like him. When he arrived at the pool section, he examined a lot of people, mutants, etc. playing with each other as some cursed when the ball didn’t entered the hole, and with that many people he managed to detect you. There you are, with a man in red and black suit. It seems like he was teaching you how to play the game of pool, you were bended over the table, the stick on hand while pointing towards the white ball. The man also bended, his ‘largeness’ pressed to you while he held both of your hands educating you the right moves. And to his point of view, you were taking pleasure at the gesture of the disguised man.

“Deadpool he’s here! Take position!”

You could feel Deadpool’s raging boner pressed to your ass, “Will you control your penis?!”

He snickered, “Sorry dear, the Author won’t let me and besides I like this position.”

“He’s marching over the table,” Loki serenely stated while smirking. “ He seems upset. Good luck having a rough sex tonight (Y/N).” Even though Jerome was most likely to have rough sex by his looks and his infamous status, truth to be told he was gentle in bed. Afraid to hurt you, but now it seems not. You gulped at the thought, “Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it.”

“You shouldn’t speak that kind of stuff with a child nearby.” Maleficent concealed Draco’s ears and glared at the people around the pool table. She casted a spell around the boy’s eyes that was now covered with clouds, unable to see. “My father will hear about this!” he whined, wrestling the lady’s hands while waving off the cloud that seems to stay just on spot.

Tom Riddle moaned, “Children.”

“True,” Bill Cipher said, rolling his eyes while sipping on a wine glass that was poured with the blood of a certain child that was accompanied by an eye.

“(Y/N)!” Jerome marched over to you, his face evident with anger. He grabbed your arm and roughly pulled you with him towards the exit. “Whoa bro, chillax, have a kit kat!” Deadpool chortled.

“ENOUGH!” Jerome shot a bullet towards Deadpool, a perfect shot on his forehead. He groaned in pain as Jerome just pushed you to the exit, with one last sympathetic look at your best friend. He just gave pained thumbs up while slowly crouching down and was now laying in pain while the other villains peeked at the state of him being on the ground moaning while mumbling incoherent words.

“I hate being immortal,” he groaned in pain. “Why the fuck did the author even made Jerome shot me before he fucks the reader, clearly she got what she wants as I suffer through the pain.” He rolled the last words.

“Don’t worry, I’m a Doctor.” Doctor Bong snuck in.

“Last time you said that to me you made me try to kill the big man with the claws and that kitty girl.”

“At least he’s doctor.” Tate Langdon shrugged. “How the fuck are you out with the curse shit stuff ghost boy?!”

“It’s Halloween.”

“Oh right, well I’m happy for Jeromey trying a new genre of sex this time.”

And that’s when all the villains including the anti-heroes nodded in agreement.

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girl-next-door-writes · 8 years ago

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Hello Neighbour

Characters: Tony x Reader

Summary: Living next door to Tony Stark is, unsurprisingly, a little bit of a nightmare but how much could you take before you are seriously planning to sneak in and murder the inconsiderate ass in his sleep?

Word Count: 2041 words

Prompt “You’re my new neighbor, but I know you’re stealing my wifi to watch porn. Can you not?”

A/N: This is for @bionic-buckyb and her fabulous challenge. Thanks for the prompt sweetie. xx

You weren’t usually a passive aggressive note kinda person and as you found yourself scribbling yet another post-it note for the inconsiderate asshole who had moved into the apartment next door you let out a frustrated growl. It had started innocently enough. The wonderful, amazing gay couple that you adored moved out into a gorgeous, much larger condo and you had waited the arrival of your new neighbour with a little trepidation but general hope. You had been at work when they moved in and upon entering the hall you’d had to climb over several boxes just strewn about the place with a frown. It was okay though, perhaps they were moving in by themselves and with the parking restrictions had to get everything in the building as quickly as possible. You got how stressful moving was so you let it slide. When the thumping bass caused your bed to vibrate so much it woke you at 3am you had simply taken a steadying breath and tried to focus on the fact that your new neighbour was still unpacking at this hour and deserved your pity, the music was probably just to keep them awake to finish what they could.

The next morning as you headed off to work you had placed a bright yellow post-it note on their door, not wanting to wake them after such a late night, which simply said, ‘Hello new neighbour! Welcome to our lovely little building. The recycling goes out tomorrow so feel free to cram as many of your boxes down by the basement door as you can.’ You had thought it was pleasant and informative and went on your way.

Dragging yourself back home after what felt like the longest day in history your eyebrows raised when you found an orange post-it note stuck to your door. Wondering if it was from your new neighbour your face crumpled in disgust as you saw it was a drawing of a penis. Oh great, there was a very real possibility you were now living next-door to an overgrown man-child. Quickly snatching the note from the door you let yourself in and threw your bag on the sofa as you wondered what to do about this latest development.

It was three days later that you made your next move. In that time you had been woken up in the early hours by the terrible choice of music echoing through the wall from your friendly neighbour, the hall was still littered with boxes only they were now empty as if waiting the recycling fairy. You had ordered a pizza yesterday and strongly suspected it had ended up next door as you argued over the phone with the pizza place and for some reason you were pretty damned sure was to do with the asshole next door, who you had yet to meet face to face, although you couldn’t prove it. You had lunch with your friend Joe who was well known for his daft responses to these situations and you were certain he would be able to help. Together you had drafted a selection of possible responses and so here you were taping up your note. It was a drawing of a T-rex and next to it you had scribbled, ‘T-Rex has tiny arms, much too small to pick up empty boxes and take them to the basement for recycling. What’s your excuse?’ You and Joe had giggled about that for a while as you wrote it and as you headed back to your apartment you had a smile on your face. It was petty but you were dealing with someone who thought a reasonable response was a drawing on a cock.

Waking the next morning you realised you had slept through the entire night. Perhaps your note had worked, maybe they had seen it and laughed a little before agreeing that they should probably move those boxes. You had a few blissful hours as you got ready for work, this was going to be a good day. Opening your front door you froze. “You have got to be fucking kidding me.” Turned out the reason asshat hadn’t kept you up was because he was busy making a wall of boxes in front of your door. Shaking your head you took out your phone and clicked a quick photo before sending it off to Joe. Eyeing the structure you wondered if you moved a few boxes if they would all come crashing down. Carefully you slid one of the middle ones towards you and placed it by your sofa. Returning to the door you removed a few more until you had an archway of boxes. Deciding to leave it there so you could get to work on time you spent your whole day fuming. Who the fuck did they think they were. It wasn’t funny and it was dangerous. What if there had been a fire? What if you had collapsed and the ambulance guys had to get to you and they were delayed because of the boxes? There was no doubt in your mind that this douche needed teaching a lesson.

And so, the war of passive aggression raged on. You would tape a message to his door, he would tape a meme to yours. ‘Hey I just met you and this is crazy but pick up your shit you lazy asshat.’… ‘Dear recycling police, how about you clear up your own cardbox castle before picking on mere minions.’ … ‘I know you have a kick ass sound system but if I wanted to sleep in a nightclub I’d pick one with better choice in music than you.’… ‘Sounds like you’re stressed, here have this…’ As you glared at the tampon taped onto the note your patience finally snapped.

Storming over you hammered on the door, not knowing who was going to answer, for all you knew it could be some little old lady with crap taste in dance music. The door opened and a squirrelly looking brunette pushed his glasses up his nose, obviously uncomfortable with the rage that radiated off you. “I have had enough. Seriously, who the fuck do you think you are? You move in here and leave a mess everywhere then play your music when everyone else is trying to sleep and…” You paused and the moment of silence was filled with the unmistakable sound of a woman faking an orgasm. Looking at the man with surprise you could see his cheeks flush before he glanced over his shoulder then back to you.

“I don’t live here. This is my… friend, Tony’s place. Look, he’s not a bad guy just a little wired. I am so sorry if he’s been upsetting you, I’m sure he didn’t mean to.” The nervous guy rubbed the back of his neck and looked at you apologetically.

“Hey Bruce, the connection is 78% faster now I’m piggybacking off the guy next door with the stick up his ass.” The voice rang out before you saw him and by that point the burning fury within you had you at the point where when you did speak your words sounded calm and measured.

“You’re my new neighbor, but I know you’re stealing my wifi to watch porn. Can you not? And while you’re at it maybe you could clear up your shit in the common areas, not steal other people’s pizza orders, not play your music so loud after, say, 11pm? You live in this building with other people you asshole.” You glared at the man who seemed pretty taken aback by you.

“You’re… you live next door?” His eyes fell to the piece of paper in your hand with the tampon still attached and he winced. In all honesty he’d figured it was some uptight guy he was messing with, not some hot chick who now thought he was a major dick. Shit. “In my defense, you have very masculine handwriting.” Bruce ran his rand over his face and shook his head. You could feel the tears welling up in your eyes through sheer frustration, there was no way you were going to win this one so you turned on your heels and stalked back to your apartment, slamming the door as you entered.

“Tony…” Bruce turned to him with a look of someone who had witnessed enough of his friends errant behavior to last a lifetime.

“She started it!” he shot back defensively.

“What?” Bruce sighed as he closed the door.

“Yeah, she stuck up a note, hang on, I’ve got it here somewhere.” He handed Bruce the yellow post-it and watched as his friend read it.

“How is this starting it? It’s a welcome to the building note with a little information she probably thought was helpful.” Looking up at Tony, Bruce’s heart sank when he saw the hint of guilt on his friends face. “What did you do?”

As Tony filled Bruce in on all the back and forth of the last few weeks he realised how bad things had got.

The hammering on your door made you jump but you had no intention of answering it. Instead you moved to your bedroom and watched Netflix on your laptop. You were tired and frustrated and would probably have to start looking for somewhere else to live. Falling into a restless sleep you were glad that you didn’t have to work tomorrow, maybe you could catch up on some much needed sleep.

It started at about 11am. There was a knock on the door and you were surprised when you opened it to a huge bunch of flowers. Bringing them in you saw there was a note and you figured someone probably got the wrong apartment. ‘I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. Tony.’ Taking a quick photo you sent it off to Joe to ask if you should really cave that easily but staying mad at your neighbor was about to prove more difficult than you knew.

12:30 you received a giant cookie with the words ‘Sorry I’m an asshole’ iced onto it.

2:00 a barbershop quartet can to your door and serenaded you with their very own version of Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word.

4:30 a pizza you knew you hadn’t ordered along with garlic bread and a tub of ice cream were delivered and had already been paid for.

6:00 you sat down at your laptop and noticed the internet connection had gone again. Opening to menu to reconnect you scanned the options and a small chuckle escaped you as you saw what you assumed to be your internet connection had been renamed. ‘Tony Stark will now be using his own connection to watch porn.’ You had to hand it to the guy, he was an irritating, thoughtless asshat but this was all one hell of an apology.

Deciding to let him know he was forgiven you left your apartment to a spotless hallway, not a single box in sight. With an amused smile on your lips you knocked lightly on Tony’s door. It swung open and your new neighbor leaned nonchalantly against the door frame with a hint of concern beneath his mask of cockiness. You hadn’t really looked at him yesterday, hadn’t noticed that he was actually quite an attractive asshole. There was something about his eyes though, a vulnerability that made you wonder if that was the reason he pushed peoples buttons, to see how they would push back. “Hi, I’m you’re new neighbor. Welcome to the building.” You extended your hand as if the last few weeks hadn’t happened and this was his first night here.

“I’m Tony, it is lovely to meet you. I warn you, I’m not used to living with other people around so if I overstep then please feel free to come storming round here and yell at me. You want to come in for a drink?” His eyes searched yours hopefully and when you nodded the pure joy that spread across his face made your heart stutter. Maybe living next door to Tony wasn’t going to be so bad after all. “We can watch some porn if you’d like, I have my own wifi now.” Yeah, maybe not bad but definitely interesting.

Tags: @deanxfuckingadorablexwinchester @nea90sweetie @knittingknerdy @feelmyroarrrr @vintagevalentinexx @goody2shoessmut @cojootromuelle @palaiasaurus64 @littleblue5mcdork @littlenerdgirl16 @iwillbeinmynest @buckyhawk @almondbuttercup @beccaanne814-blog @canumoveyourseatup-no @callamint @like-a-bag-of-potatoes

#myfic #something i wrote #kaits5kauchallenge

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transamorousnetwork · 4 years ago

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Love What You Have, Get What You Want

Editor’s note: In this series, we’ll highlight conversations with our readers/viewers. We think folks will benefit from these conversations. All names are made up to protect everyone’s privacy.

Dear The Transamorous Network

Hi, very happy to have found you and all your blogs.

I have been trans attracted for as long as I can remember back into my early teens. I can remember the first time I saw a picture in a magazine revealling a very attractive trans woman before the internet existed so I am thinking for me it is baked in.

My thought on the subject of “tranny chaser” is that it is no different than any other baked in desire for me personally. I work with guys who will drop everything including their jaw when a large butt wanders by, I have a friend who requires nothing more than a large pair of breasts and a pulse. I like legs.

A trans woman with great legs is a huge plus and they are quite common. I am married and have been for decades, pretty happy, she has great legs and large breasts. The breasts are nice but down on the list for me behind a great personality and loyalty, honesty etc. The fact that the trans women I have met and dated in the past had a penis was definitely a plus but a penis is quite common and I have one that I enjoy, so it has to be more than that for me.

Looks are always going to be the first selling point but having dated great looking women and trans women in the past that had unattractive personalities I can state that for me there needs to be more. I discovered that with the right trans woman a true and honest date and meaningful conversation can really bring out the best in a jaded person.

Getting to second base has always been after the personality shows up and it is one I can enjoy. I have noticed that even though the trans women I have known well have all had regular everyday office jobs or as a nurse in one instance and that they have a lot to offer in the work place and in a relationship.

To be trans is a decision that is not an option, it is also baked in and the problems and speed bumps that are attached to the lifestyle make for a solutions oriented, problem solving, person that has to battle adversity, usually alone.

I am thankful to have had the opportunity to have met some very cool trans women and cis women. Luckily for me because personality is high on my requirements, age, height, background, race, wealth, blonde, brunette matter very little.

Everything is negotiable in my head. I have some things I find unattractive, smoking, lazyness, lack of independence, but not deal breakers I have discovered. So having said all that, am I still a “tranny chaser”?

I would think, no. I think I like women and a woman with a penis is not a problem. I very much like to find what makes a womens engine rev hard and knowing what makes a penis and a prostate work can very much work in my favor.

Cis women seem to be a bit reserved sexually in my experience, not so much with trans women who know what they want.

Turns out males have no attraction for me, not even slightly as I can attest to having been subjected to gay sex on TV lately. Not a flicker of anything. I like women, lucky for me. Looks like a duck, quacks like a duck for me it is a duck. Thank you for being there for us trans amourous guys.

Kyle

Hey Kyle,

Well that was a fun read!

We’re happy you found us too. What a fun perspective you have, open, thoughtful, considered. It’s so fun seeing men like yourself writing us and, in doing so affirming (both for transgender women and trans-attracted people) the validity of being trans-attracted, having genital preferences, body preferences, boob preferences, leg preferences, women, men, tall, short…preferences. Preferences aren’t just good, they’re great!

The only reason a trans woman labels a man a “chaser” is from their own frustration, bitterness and self-loathing combined with not getting what they want. The problem is the woman throwing that word around doesn’t know she’s setting herself up to be bitter and alone…or faced with compromising what she really wants for something less than that. Meanwhile “chasers” are getting what they want!

Everyone can get what they want. The world is big enough, the trans community is big enough. The question is: is any given individual’s stories big enough to include what they want?

For most, it’s obvious, isn’t it?

We encourage people tell stories only about what they want, then watch what happens. We like your comment because it’s a direct response to what we want: more men loving themselves.

Well done!

#transgender #transamory #transamorous network #transattracted #transattraction #men who love transwomen #t4m #transgirl

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oihjtpoaetat7 · 7 years ago

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Is this a journal now? I guess I just want to write some thoughts down in a place ill remember... I want to cry. I learned the term “stone femme” today. I looked it up, there also the term “paper” vs “stone”.

I’m not sure how to navigate the labels I’ve found that somehow fit. I’m afraid to write them. I’m afraid to write them down and that a later me, a me from the future will read it and laugh. That I’ll laugh at what is my current self. I’m glad that I honored my past selves for my birthday, and I hope to never insult things that I have once held dear. I am writing this down now, with the hope that I will never ridicule myself for trying to figure all of this out. Future me, if you are reading this, please honor me. Some labels I have found helpful, in order of apparition in my life: Lesbian: I guess lesbian porn is the first thing I ever watched. Not sure why, it just seemed like a more natural, less violent thing to watch. Lesbian is a woman who loves women. Easy to understand as a kid, even though I never identified as such. Sex: Ohhhh, so the penis goes INSIDE the vagina..... DAMN Rape: This is dangerous and I must protect myself from it Bisexual or bi-curious: I guess this makes sense. Of course, I like boys, who doesn’t like boys? I must like boys, never questioned it that is for sure. In any case, girls are nice too. I like girls (maybe?) but I'm not supposed to. I guess sometimes I think this word, but I don’t remember very well. I’m not quite ready to say bi-sexual vs bi-curious because I don’t feel I have the CV for it. Girl friends: I have a friend who is pretty and soft. We sleep over often and I want to spend every waking minute with her. Virginity: You loose it to someone you love. Maybe it will hurts. Blow job: I give my first in the woodshop in the basement of my first (and only) boyfriend’s parents country house. I don’t really want to, to be honest it grosses me out, but this is what girlfriends do so I do it. Penis: My boyfriend jokes that I am afraid of them. He says that because I think they are gross and I hate touching them. Blue Balls: If you touch a man and then stop, or if you arouse a man and then stop, you are hurting him, you have caused him pain, sometimes unbearable pain. Sometimes, by simply existing in space, I cause unbearable pain to my boyfriends, thus I must remediate to the situation. Dissociation: When you feel like you are not in your body anymore. Sometimes I dissociate during sex with my boyfriend.

Best friends: I’m in love with my best friend and my nipples hurt because we have started sleeping together and she won’t leave my tits alone. I tell her and we laugh, she says she will go easy.

Queer: Gay, but in a way, I don’t really have to describe. It’s catch-all for gender and sexuality, I don’t have to explain myself, nothing to prove. I like this word.

Consent: Not sure why I did not know about this before. I discover for the first time what it feels like.

Boyfriend: I want a boyfriend. I want to feel safe. Someone give me a boyfriend. Daddy: Holy fuck, this is even better than a boyfriend. Gender: This is not the same as sex.

Non-binary: When I learn this word I don’t understand it. It’s frustrating and it seems to fit nowhere in my experience as a POC. I feel left out of something that could have had meaning for me. Cis people: I don’t think about my gender, I’m cis. Asexual: What????????????? This is a thing???? Relief. I thought I was broken because I was afraid to touch. I thought I had a problem because I don’t really know if I really ever feel “want”. When I try to touch, anxiety overpowers me. Demisexual: Sometimes I do want, I think. I’m not sure, I experience it for the first time with Devon. I think. Trans: Devon is trans and I love him very dearly. He is my sweet girl, we are “in lesbians” with each other.

Pansexual / Panromantic: Attraction across gender, I like this much more than bisexual. I am specifically not bisexual. Polyamourous: nothing to do with queers, but somehow lotsa queers are into this. Am I into it? Im queer.... it seems to accomodate queer lifestyle... i dont know... Femme daddy: Not sure I remember the definition of this one, but it blows my mind. A mix of femme and masc that I’ve never heard of before Stone butch: Myloe does not want to be touched (to some degree). I knew nothing about “stone”. This is also a revelation! Some people have very specific desires and boundaries and thats ok. (It never occurs to me that the opposite of stone butches exist, I just notice that its incredibly convenient for me to be with a stone butch). Binder: mysterious contraption that I am afraid to touch Trauma: When something hurts a lot and you can’t get over it. Sometimes it changes you as a person. Not sure how much of it is part of me now. Genderfucking/ gender play: At first for Devon, and then for me. Playing around with my gender opens a new world of possibilities for me. When I switch gender I feel things differently, my anxieties change. I am not bound by the same fears anymore. I gain a different type of power. Penis: An organ that is part of the body of the woman I love, thus: organ that I love touching. “Daddy” / Desire: This word takes a new meaning when it is said about me. My body feels different. I finally feel “want” in a way that I have never felt before. I crave. I desire. I want to touch and bite. My skin is on fire and my whole body melts. Vagina: Thing that scares the fuck out of me. Sexual assault: He has kind eyes, he is shy and very cute. I want to hang out all of us, but once I am in his hotel room, I feel like I’ve been tricked? Where are the others? We hang out a bit. And then I say no. Maybe I did not say it strongly enough. Gay: I am gay. I hate men. They make me sick. Transmasculine: Different shades of AFAB people....... They are all beautiful and I am attracted to many Gender-fluid: I play daddy. I dress up as daddy. At first for fun, to see what happens. And then I like the power. I like the ease and freedom. I like how it feels. I like to move this way and navigate space, social and physical, with this shape. I switch from one to the other depending on what I want out of the situation, I guess sometimes I just want that extra persuasion. Nonbinary: I still hate this word. But I think it out of convenience sometimes. I feel like a fraud, but since I dont claim this as a status, I am comfortable within my gender. I dont want to be policed. I just want to be a hot daddy. Trans man, hormones, top surgery: Some men are trans. I’m hooking up with Jordan and they are HOT holy fuck. They stone also, but they didn’t say it like that. Penis: Jordan has like six penises on their night table. What?? Penises? Holy fuck. What if I had a penis I could strap on. What?? I never thought about this. I’m thinking about going penis shopping! THE REVELATION:

STONE FEMME, OR “PAPER”: THE OPPOSITE OF STONE. DOES NOT LIKE TO TOUCH. THIS IS A VALID QUEER IDENTY??? what??? this blows my mind. I tell eliane about stone butch, they check it out on wikipedia and tell me about stone femme. I say what??? I don't know this word??? it blows my mind. I don’t have to touch if I don't want to? Most, if not all, of my sexual life, is me having to touch and not wanting to. What do you mean I don't have to touch? What do you mean? What do you mean? Do you mean I am not broken? Do you mean I am not hopeless? Does paper mean that I can be loved? Does paper mean I deserve to be wanted? Does paper mean I can “want” in my own time? Does paper mean I do not have to be alone, in the dark, to heal? Does paper mean I deserve warmth? Does paper mean I can be touched, without fear, without pain, without guilt? Does paper mean that I will not tense up, will not dissociate, will not cry when I am asked to touch? Does paper mean I can cordially say “no” and set my rules? Stand my ground? Honor my body? My self? I am afraid of saying this word to others. I feel like I must justify it with words like “trauma”, “rape”. and “assault”. Truth is I’m not sure what paper means to me. I don’t want to define it to anyone but myself. I like this word, it’s pretty, I want to protect it, it is very dear to me. It fills me with joy and tears.

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viralhottopics · 8 years ago

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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: ‘Can people please stop telling me feminism is hot?’

The novelist has been accused of making equality mainstream: isnt that the point? Plus an extract from her new Feminist Manifesto In Fifteen Suggestions

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie was in Lagos last summer, teaching a writing workshop as part of an annual schedule that sees her time divided between Nigeria and the US. For much of the year, Adichie lives in a town 30 minutes west of Baltimore, where her Nigerian-American husband works as a medic and the 39-year-old writes in the quiet of a suburban home. When Adichie is in Nigeria, where her parents and extended family still live, she has a house in the vast city she regards with the complicated love and condescension of the part-time expat.

Its an ambivalence with which many Nigerians regard her, too; last year, the workshop ended in a question-and-answer session, during which a young man rose to ask the famous novelist a question. I used to love you, she recalls him saying. Ive read all your books. But since you started this whole feminism thing, and since you started to talk about this gay thing, Im just not sure about you any more. How do you intend to keep the love of people like me?

Adichie and I are in a coffee shop near her home in the Baltimore suburbs. We have met before, a few years ago, when her third novel Americanah was published, a book that examines what it is to be a Nigerian woman living in the US, and that went on to win a National Book Critics Circle award. A lot has happened since then. Half Of A Yellow Sun, Adichies second and most famous novel, about the Biafran war, has been made into a film starring Chiwetel Ejiofor and Thandie Newton. Her essay, We Should All Be Feminists, adapted from her 2013 TEDx talk, has remained on the bestseller lists, particularly in Sweden, where in 2015 it was distributed to every 16-year-old high-school student in the land. The talk was sampled by Beyonc in her song Flawless. Adichie has become the face of Boots No7 makeup. And she has had a baby, a daughter, now 15 months old.

Adichie is still somewhat in the blast zone, not entirely caught up on sleep, but has published a short book, Dear Ijeawele, Or A Feminist Manifesto In Fifteen Suggestions, an extended version of a letter to a friend who, after having her own baby girl, asked Adichies advice on how to raise her to be feminist. I have had twin girls myself since our last meeting, so I am curious about her approach, not least because one of my two-year-olds currently identifies as Bob the Builder and the other as Penelope Pitstop. I would like to equip them to be themselves, while resisting whatever projections might be foisted upon them. We show each other baby photos and smile. Welcome to the world of anxiety, Adichie says.

The success of We Should All Be Feminists has made Adichie as prominent for her feminism as for her novels, to the extent that now I get invited to every damned feminist thing in the whole world. She has always been an agony aunt of sorts, the unpaid therapist for my family and friends, but having the feminist label attached has changed things, and not just among her intimates. I was opened to a certain level of hostility that I hadnt experienced before as a writer and public figure.

This is partly why she has written the new book, to reclaim the word feminism from its abusers and misusers, a category within which she would include certain other progressives, and to lay down in plain, elegant English her beliefs about child-raising.

Dear Ijeawele is, in some ways, a very basic set of appeals; to be careful with language (never say because you are a girl), avoid gendered toys, encourage reading, dont treat marriage as an achievement, reject likability. Her job is not to make herself likable, her job is to be her full self, she writes in reference to her friends daughter, a choice Adichie has come to elevate almost above any other.

That day in Lagos last summer, her friends were furious at the cheek of the young mans question, but she rather liked his bravery and honesty in asking it. She replied in the same spirit. Keep your love, Adichie said. Because, sadly, while I love to be loved, I will not accept your love if it comes with these conditions.

Having a baby has made Adichie think differently about her own parents, particularly her mother. Grace Adichie, who had six children and worked her way up from being a university administrator to the registrar, taught her daughter to love fashion as well as books, and was a very cool mum whom she idolised as a child. Nonetheless, and in the manner of most snotty young adults, young Chimamanda went through a phase of being very superior to her mother. Now, the novelist looks at her daughter and gulps.

Adichie recently came across her own kindergarten reports. My father keeps them all. You know what the teacher wrote? She is brilliant, but she refuses to do any work when shes annoyed. I was five years old. She laughs. I couldnt believe it. My husband couldnt believe it. I must have been an annoying child.

Its not as if she comes from a family of radicals. My parents are not like that. Theyre conventional, reasonable, responsible, good, kind people. Im the crazy. But their love and support made that crazy thrive.

Unlike Adichie, who was raised exclusively in Nigeria, her daughter will be raised in two cultures and subject to slightly diverging social expectations. Already, Adichie says with a laugh, friends and relatives from home are concerned that her mothering is insufficiently stern.

A friend was just visiting and she said to me, Your parenting is not very Nigerian. In Nigeria and, I think, in many cultures you control children. And I feel like, my daughter is 15 months, she doesnt have a sense of consequences. And I enjoy watching her. So she tears a page of a book? Whatever. She throws my shoes down. So? Its fun. I love that shes quite strong-willed. The joke between Adichie and her husband whom, to her intense annoyance, their daughter looks much more like is that her character cleaves to the maternal side. He says to me, Well, at least we know where she got her personality from. Shes quite fierce.

In the new book, Adichies advice is not only to provide children with alternatives to empower boys and girls to understand there is no single way to be but also to understand that the only universal in this world is difference. In terms of the evolution of feminism, these are not new lessons, but that is rather Adichies point. She is not writing for other feminist writers, and shows some frustration at what she sees as the solipsism of much feminist debate.

That morning, on the way to see her, I had read a review of a new book by Jessa Crispin, entitled Why I Am Not A Feminist: A Feminist Manifesto, a critique of everything that is wrong with feminism today. If one can get over the eye-rolling aspect of books by feminists decrying the feminism of other feminists for degrading the word feminist by being insufficiently feminist, the book does raise questions about where one should be focusing ones efforts.

Fashion blogger Chiara Ferragni wears Adichies Dior T-shirt during Paris fashion week, January 2017. Photograph: Edward Berthelot/Getty Images

The proposition is that feminism has become so mainstream as to be an empty marketing tool, a mere slogan on a bag or a T-shirt. Without being named, Adichie is implicated in this critique, given that last year she collaborated with Christian Dior on a T-shirt bearing the line We Should All Be Feminists; depending on ones view, this is either a perfect example of pointless sloganeering or a brilliant piece of preaching to the unconverted.

Im already irritated, Adichie says. This idea of feminism as a party to which only a select few people get to come: this is why so many women, particularly women of colour, feel alienated from mainstream western academic feminism. Because, dont we want it to be mainstream? For me, feminism is a movement for which the end goal is to make itself no longer needed. I think academic feminism is interesting in that it can give a language to things, but Im not terribly interested in debating terms. I want peoples marriages to change for the better. I want women to walk into job interviews and be treated the same way as somebody who has a penis.

Still, one can see a theoretical obscenity about the Dior collaboration: the words of a movement that should be concerned with helping low-income women, used to promote and make money for a wealthy company. On the other hand: what is the damage?

Yes: whats the damage? Adichie says. I would even argue about the theoretically obscene. Theres a kind of self-righteousness to the ultra-left that is hard for me to stomach. Its approach to poverty can sometimes border on condescension. I often think that people who write a lot about poverty need to go and spend more time with poor people. I think about Nigerian women who can hardly afford anything but who love fashion. They have no money, but they work it.

Adichie mentions a TV soap opera that used to run in Nigeria called The Rich Also Cry, a terrible drama series, she says, that was very popular. But sometimes I think about that title. So, the creative director of Christian Dior is obviously a woman of some privilege. But does it then mean that she doesnt have gender-based problems in her life? Because she does. Does it mean she doesnt have this magnificent rage about gender injustice? Because she does. Wanting to use that slogan was it going to make the world a better place? No. But I think theres a level of consciousness-raising and a level of subversion that I like.

She doesnt believe it was a cynical marketing ploy? No. Sorry. Feminism is not that hot. I can tell you I would sell more books in Nigeria if I stopped and said Im no longer a feminist. I would have a stronger following, I would make more money. So when people say, Oh, feminisms a marketing ploy, it makes me laugh.

The bigger issue here is one of range. Adichies irritation with aspects of what she thinks of as professional feminism is that it runs counter to her ideas as a writer: that people contain multitudes. She is a brilliant novelist and a serious thinker, and she is also someone who makes no apology for her own trivial interests. Life doesnt always follow ideology, she says. You might believe in certain things and life gets in and things just become messy. You know? I think thats the space that fiction, and having a bit more of an imaginative approach, makes. And that the feminist speaking circuit doesnt really make room for.

There is much in the new book about double standards, including those governing the images of motherhood and fatherhood. I think we need to stop giving men cookies for doing what they should do, she says, and goes on to explain that her husband, who needs less sleep than her, tends to get up in the night to tend to the baby. On the one hand, I realise that my husband is unusual; on the other, I feel resentful when hes overpraised by my family and friends. Hes like Jesus.

He probably senses shes about to go off the deep end, I suggest, and Adichie smiles to acknowledge how impossible she is. I did all the physical work to produce her! Theres something fundamentally wrong with the way weve constructed what it means to be female in the world.

Photograph: Stephen Voss for the Guardian

This is something she writes about in a lovely passage of the new book about hair. As a child, Adichie and her sisters and every other girl she knew were routinely tortured with a metal comb to subdue their hair, something her brothers were spared. Im glad I wrote that, Adichie says. We had just come back from Lagos and my sister, God bless her, had already had a talk with me about my daughters hair. She said, You need to do something about it. With my family, theres an eye-roll and a here-we-go-again with her, and she said to me, Do you want me to send you a set of combs? And I was like, No, thank you. And I know its going to keep happening. But, no, Im not going to conform in that way. Im not going to have my child go through pain because society expects a certain neatness. It happened to me, its not going to happen to her. And Im ready to have all the battles I need to have.

The original letter on which Dear Ijeawele is based has been shared on Facebook, and while Adichie was in Lagos, a woman whod read it approached her in a shop and said, Heres my daughter, look at her hair. She had very loose cornrows that were not neat according to Nigerians. And she said, You inspired that. My daughter is happier, Im happier. And do you know, it was the highlight of my month.

This is not just a question of image. It is also about time. Women have less time than men, in almost every arena, because their responsibilities to look or act a certain way are more onerous.

It is one of Adichies bugbears that as someone who loves fashion, she is by default not taken seriously. When Boots approached her to be the face of its No7 makeup range, she said yes, because she thought it might be fun; in the end, she says, it became vaguely alarming. I have no regrets, but you wake up one day and think, what the hell have I done? There were too many of these pictures everywhere. Her point, however, is that its not that Im a feminist and made a strategic choice to speak about makeup and fashion. Its that I was raised by Grace Adichie in a culture in which you care about how you look. Its a part of me I once hid, because I felt that I had to to be serious. Now, Im just being who I am.

Recently, Adichies identity has been tested in new ways. I wonder if she is less affected by President Trump than an American, on the basis that she is less invested in the American story. Quite the opposite, she says. Because theres a part of me that needs a country I can think of as being one that largely works. Which is not a luxury that Nigeria can have. She laughs.

Someone said to me, Now that this is happening in the US, do you think of moving back to Nigeria? And I thought, no, because its not any better there. I admire America. I dont think of myself as American Im not. So its not mine. But I admire it, and so theres a sense that this thing I built in my head, its been destroyed.

There is also, she says, something familiar about it all. American democracy has never been tested. You might have disagreed ideologically with George W Bush, but he still kind of followed the rules. Here, it feels like Nigeria. It really does. Its that feeling of political uncertainty that Im very familiar with, but not a feeling I like. Its ugly. But even worse, because America is so powerful, and so much at the centre of the world, these things have consequences for everyone. Nigeria doesnt have that kind of reach, so our problems remain our problems.

In January, Adichie and her husband joined the Womens March in DC. It was fleeting, and symbolic, she says, but it gave me the smallest slice of hope. There are all of these people who seem to realise that America has changed by electing an unhinged person. On the other hand, theres a part of me thats very sceptical of too much sentimentality. I hope it translates into people organising and going out to vote.

Long before talk about piercing the filter bubble, Adichie instinctively subscribed to rightwing blogs and newsletters. She was an early watcher of Fox News, until it became too unhinged and ridiculous. But she has carried on, because Im interested in ideological concerns and how people differ, and how we should build a society. Whats a welfare state? People who have less, are we responsible for them? I think we are. And I think I can make a selfish case, which is apparently what appeals to people on the right. People on the left say we should do it because we should be kind. And people on the right think, Excuse me? But if you say to them, If these people dont get healthcare, they will go to the ER and your tax dollars will pay for it, suddenly they sit up.

Adichie with her husband, Ivara Esege. Photograph: DDAA/ZOB/Daniel Deme/WENN

As a result of her reading, rightwing ideology is not something I think is evil, she says. Some. A bit. But, in general, I dont. I have friends who are good, kind people who are on the right. But Donald Trump is an exception. Its not an objection to a conservative, because I dont even think hes a conservative. My objection is an objection to chaos. Each time I turn on the news, Im holding my breath.

Trumps erosion of language is one of the most frightening things about him, but even progressives, Adichie says, can be sloppy on this front. In response to her new book, a reporter emailed her the question: Why not humanism? (instead of feminism). To which, she says, I thought, what part of the fucking book did this person not read?

Its like the people who go around saying All Lives Matter, I say, in response to the Black Lives Matter movement. Right, which I find deeply offensive and very dishonest. Because we have to name something in order to fix it, which is why I insist on the word feminist or feminism.

This, she says, in spite of the fact that many of her friends, particularly black women, resist that word, because the history of feminism has been very white and has assumed women meant white women. Political discussion in this country still does that. Theyll say, Women voted for… and then, Black people voted for… And I think: Im black and a woman, so where do I fit in here?

As a result, Many of my friends who are not white will say, Im an intersectional feminist, or Im a womanist. And I have trouble with that word, because it has undertones of femininity as this mystical goddess-mother thing, which makes me uncomfortable. So we need a word. And my hope is we use feminism often enough that it starts to lose all the stigma and becomes this inclusive, diverse thing.

This is her goal and her defence, although she still doesnt see why she needs one. Her understanding of feminism is intertwined with her understanding that we all want to be more than one thing. And anyway, she repeats, Can people please stop telling me that feminism is hot? Because its not. Adichie looks magnificently annoyed. Honestly.

Beware feminism lite: an extract from Chimamanda Ngozi Adichies letter-turned-book, Dear Ijeawele

Be a full person. Motherhood is a glorious gift, but do not define yourself solely by it. You dont even have to love your job; you can merely love the confidence and self-fulfilment that come with doing and earning. Please reject the idea that motherhood and work are mutually exclusive. Our mothers worked full-time while we were growing up, and we turned out well at least you did; the jury is still out on me.

In these coming weeks of early motherhood, be kind to yourself. Ask for help. Expect to be helped. There is no such thing as a Superwoman. Parenting is about practice and love.

Give yourself room to fail. A new mother does not necessarily know how to calm a crying baby. Read books, look things up on the internet, ask older parents, or just use trial and error. But, above all, take time for yourself. Nurture your own needs.

I have no interest in the debate about women doing it all, because it is a debate that assumes that caregiving and domestic work are singularly female domains, an idea that I strongly reject. Domestic work and caregiving should be gender-neutral, and we should be asking not whether a woman can do it all, but how best to support parents in their dual duties at work and at home.

Photograph: Stephen Voss for the Guardian

Beware the danger of what I call Feminism Lite; the idea of conditional female equality. Being a feminist is like being pregnant. You either are or you are not. You either believe in the full equality of men and women, or you do not.

Teach your daughter to question language. A friend of mine says she will never call her daughter princess. The word is loaded with assumptions, of a girls delicacy, of the prince who will come to save her. This friend prefers angel and star. So decide the things you will not say to your child. You know that Igbo joke, used to tease girls who are being childish What are you doing? Dont you know you are old enough to find a husband? I used to say that often. But now I choose not to. I say, You are old enough to find a job. Because I do not believe that marriage is something we should teach young girls to aspire to.

Try not to use words like misogyny and patriarchy. We feminists can sometimes be too jargony. Teach her that if you criticise X in women but do not criticise X in men, you do not have a problem with X, you have a problem with women. For X please insert words like anger, ambition, loudness, stubbornness, coldness, ruthlessness.

Do you remember how we laughed and laughed at an atrociously written piece about me some years ago? The writer had accused me of being angry, as though being angry were something to be ashamed of. Of course I am angry. I am angry about racism. I am angry about sexism. But I recently came to the realisation that I am angrier about sexism than I am about racism. Because in my anger about sexism, I often feel lonely. Because I love, and live among, many people who easily acknowledge race injustice but not gender injustice.

Teach your daughter to question men who can have empathy for women only if they see them as relational rather than as individual equal humans. Men who, when discussing rape, will say something like, If it were my daughter or wife or sister. Yet such men do not need to imagine a male victim of crime as a brother or son in order to feel empathy.

Teach her, too, to question the idea of women as a special species. I once heard an American politician, in his bid to show his support for women, speak of how women should be revered and championed a sentiment that is all too common. Tell her that women dont need to be championed and revered; they just need to be treated as equal human beings.

This is a condensed and edited extract from Dear Ijeawele, Or A Feminist Manifesto In Fifteen Suggestions, by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, published on Tuesday by Fourth Estate at 10. To order a copy for 8.50, go to bookshop.theguardian.com

This article was amended on 4 March 2017. It originally referred to Lagos as Nigerias capital. This has now been corrected.