#in some i knew immediately the song
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I was tagged by @somethingsgottasaveyou spell my url with song titles! I appreciate the music tags.
With You▪︎Linkin Park
Helena▪︎My Chemical Romance
Evil Angel▪︎Breaking Benjamin
No Evil▪︎Catch Your Breath
Thoughts & Prayers▪︎Motionless In White
Hard Reset▪︎The Word Alive
Everybody's Fool▪︎Evanescence
Miracle▪︎Bad Omens
Use Me▪︎Pvris
Snuff▪︎Slipknot
Inside my head▪︎Until I Wake
Crazy▪︎ From Ashes To New
Feel Nothing▪︎The Plot In You
All I Wanted▪︎Paramore
DOA▪︎I Prevail
Enemy▪︎Beartooth
Sugar We Goin Down▪︎Fall Out Boy
No pressure tags @lilturtell @just-a-cereal-killer @ease-out-the-clutch @meteoriteskies @tall-dark-godly @cumsumedbyhim @velvtangelreboot @timidxtempted @figure8track (apparently it's too much to ask of tumblr to allow me to tag you) @musings-of-a-rambling-man and everyone else who wants to do this!
#thank you for the tag!#music tags#in some i knew immediately the song#but for others it's like i've forgotten all the songs i've heard before 😅#this was fun until you realize how long your url is 🤦♀️#music is life#music is my love language
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Thinking thoughts about those from Cuivienen and how they later treated the Valar, especially after Cuivienen was destroyed.
I imagine a foundation of sorrow and a layer of betrayal and pettiness. They had promised safety. And how did it turn out? Kin of Tata and Tatie their first leaders, slain in Valinor by the Dark Hunter from which the Valar promised protection in Valinor.
And then, the War of Wrath comes and with it the destruction of Cuivienen.
If any of those were re-embodied in Aman, I wonder if they make it a point to always turn their back to Valar and Maiar. I wonder if they only speak in the tongue they had first devised all those millennia ago and spoke in Cuivienen before time and different kindreds changed the tongue, not Sindarin or Quenya from the Great Journey's time or later. I wonder if they sing songs in their ancient tongue, songs about the beauty and unsullied health of Cuivienen every time any of the Ainur are near.
I wonder if the Valar feel any shame when those who they once looked upon in wonder and love gaze back at them with indifference or disgust.
#i am so normal about the elves of cuivienen feeling the betrayal worse than anyone in aman including feanor and co#they PROMISED safety from Morgoth and orcs. they PROMISED beautiful lands without sorrow. they PROMISED all that and down the line#decided Mogoth had played pretend well enough to warrant him probation during which he immediately killed again#returns to the east and sullies what beauty had been left. and then even from afar he manages to hurt those from cuivienen with the WoW#dont get me wrong i think the cuivienen elves knew there had to be war against Morgoth for him to be defeated. but the fact that the valar#decided not to only abandon those of beleriand for over 5 centuries before that AND once the war is won also abandon#those of cuivienen to watch their beloved lands drown without as much a warning must sting.#i want there to be a concious decision of 'you abandoned your promise to us twice why should we ever trust you again even in your own lands'#a 'you promised our people who folowed you safety. you didnt deliver. you promised us freedom from morgoth. you didnt deliver. in fact your#inadequacy and decision to let him loose made everything worse for us in the east. why should we ever listen to anything you say'#and thus a concious effort to shed association with Aman as the Valar govern it. they cant leave. the way is shut. but they can establish#a sticking to their own tongue and traditions without the interference of the Ainur. they've done enough. not enough and yet quite enough.#the avari are welcome should some be reborn.#i never know if i want those of cuivienen to be reborn in aman or fade into unexistence entirely both have merit and sexy hcs#but if any were reborn i think they would get along fairly alright with the exiles. kinslaying exiles? 50/50 depending on repentance#but anyone who does not believe the valar's words and respects their decision to not ever be associated with them is welcomed neutral-warmly#they teach them songs about cuivienen. the sweet waters. beautiful meadows. the birdsong that sounds extra cheerful. fish in abundance#and in turn they get taught songs about beleriand. bewitched forests. victorious battles. wild rivers. frothy shores.#it is seen as an honour to be taught a song about Cuivienen by the people who sat by its shores once. in their language/dialect/whatever#instead of in sindarin or quenya. some millenia into the 4th age tou have a surge of ppl speaking cuivienen dialect#it becomes a clear distinction of who still has fondness left for the valar and who would feel indifferent if they vanished suddenly.#this tag essay has gotten way too long again. sorry besties it will happen again.#tag essay longer than the fucking post???? help#tolkien headcanons
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Song of the Day: September 4
“Paint My Face” by The Devil Makes Three
#song of the day#looking for a quote I knew I had written down in one of my 'going to want to read this one again' folders#(the quote was by Starke of howtofightwrite:#'Full plate works fantastically against some weapons‚ but‚ ultimately‚ if you're a giant bell and someone else has a hammer‚#I can completely botch a metaphor.'#I wanted this quote in relation to a tangent from an explanation I was giving Duncan about Mandalorians and slug-throwers#this is very how my mind works)#and I first looked for 'hammer' and found the beloved howtofightwrite quote#(also Warsan Shire 'The House' lines: 'Sometimes the men - they come with keys‚ and sometimes‚ the men - they come with hammers.')#but then I was thinking 'what if I looked for swords' on account of I am very swordtember excited and then lo and behold the lyrics!#'if I should fall / you take my sword / all that is mine / will be yours#do not fear for those we leave behind / the blood that runs in your veins it is mine'#also special mention to the quote immediately above it which I had almost forgot and which would be such a tragedy to lose#'when one is without debilitating venom‚ one must be as a horse do' (mule kick) from a tumblr post by teaboot
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Kinda sad how my standards for 21st-century music are so low that I often hear a song and my reaction goes like this:
"Wtf, this is AMAZING! I didn't know anyone was making this music this good anymore!?!! Have I just found my new favorite band???!?"
(I then check the release date and see it's from the 60s/70s/80s)
"Oh... I see, okay. In that case, it's actually just kind of average for that time period. It's a bop, but nothing out of the ordinary for its era."
#cosmo gyres#personal#about music#i can't tell you how often this happens... it's really absurd#the same song is either 'top 2%' or 'middle of the road' depending on its era#bc the average quality of music Back In The Day was just so ridiculously high#that something that would blow the world away today was just 'eh. whatever' back then#happened to me today with the artist 'Box of Frogs'#i knew nothing about them and started to listen#immediately thought 'what?!? this is some LEGENDARY blues rock jam shit STOP THE PRESS'#then i saw the album release date was 1984 and i was like 'ohhhh okay. i mean it's still pretty cool for the 80s but less remarkable'#and then i found out most of the members of the band had previously been in the Yardbirds (formed 1963)#and with that contextual knowledge i didn't even find the music particularly exceptional anymore#because i was putting it in its correct historical context#it's kind of sad to me how this can happen but i'd rather be informed than not i guess#tag rant#musicblogging
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Pingi <3
#I don't understand how some people can make art in a few hours or days#this took me like 2 months rip#but I'm so happy about how it turned out tbh#mingi with short pink hair was a cultural reset and I got to see him live#I immediately knew I needed to draw him but I HATE I take so long to draw anything#I really need to study and practice more#maybe that will make the process easier#mingi#song mingi#ateez#ateez fanart#mingi fanart#kpop fanart#ateez mingi#digital art#pink mingi
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Month 7, day 30
Two new materials today! First up is a camouflage patterned fabric, and the second is a nice thrown clay :D
#the great artscapade of 2024#art#my art#blender#blender render#blender 3d#cycles render#y'all#y'all I made a discover#...discovery#you knew what I meant#and actually this is one of those ''we been knew'' things but I want to gush about it anyway#so we're all old enough to know the Song of Storms from The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time right?#good news!#it works! :D#it's Bone Meltingly McFucking Hot™ outside this week and yesterday when I was walking home I started humming it#because I *really really* wanted it to rain and cool things down#well it didn't rain immediately but a nice breeze did kick up#so I thanked Garuda (as I do) for the nice breeze and hummed it again#and then some thicc-ass clouds blew in and blocked the sun#so I thanked Ramuh (as I do) and hummed a bit more because I like to#and the breeze picked up a little and the clouds got thicker#so I laughed and thanked them both (as I do) and just as a little joke I started singing various songs I know about rain#and the breeze and shade just kept getting better and better so I kept going until a gust about knocked me on my ass and made me laugh#so I was like ''what do you two like it when I sing to you?'' so I sang a bit more and the answer was apparently yes#and then I got home and 24 hours passed and I was on my way home again and I thought you know what?#I'ma try it again#so I did!#I sang the Song of Storms and various other songs and the breeze and clouds played nice so I thanked Garuda and Ramuh for their blessings#AND THEN
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twitter has finally started serving me yakuza tweets, and one of them included this image, which is apparently from the online card game spinoff (???)
this is so funny to me, majima really says "oh shit my bad" and immediately gives up, we love a "crazy" rival who can still read the room
#rambles#yakuza liveblogging#honestly ive been pleasantly surprised by majima#all i knew about him going into these games was that hes ~crazy~ and hes always trying to fight kiryu#so i kind of expected him to be a pretty one-note character and was glad to find out he's not#its way more fun that majima trying to fight kiryu so often isnt basically just one-sided harassment from majima#its a bit that theyre both in on and cool with (even if kiryu's role in the whole song & dance is to act annoyed and put upon)#and the bit immediately gets suspended when shit gets serious#theyve just got a much more compelling dynamic than i was expecting- didnt think theyd have much of a rapport (if any) outside of fighting#thought it be like kiryu beat majima once and made majima hell-bent on rematching kiryu until he won#but in reality majima only picks fights with kiryu *because of* their existing dynamic#and in fact pretty clearly throws some fights for kiryu's sake#idk. its neat! we love a little mutual respect
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If you’re starting a song rec tag please consider Welly Boots by the amazing devil for kelsier and vin. It’s absolutely devastating
🥺 OKAY.............
#lyrics that made me forgive u for sneaking the guy from the witchers band in here#joking. but fr i knew he was in a band somehow but genius dot com sure told me immediately just now#music recs#will be the tag! wish i could back tag some of these there have been a lot of song recs#asks#mistborn
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so uhh i just finished s2 of heartstopper and as i'm sure you could guess i am currently feeling some Things
#heartstopper spoilers#you can't have an emotional aroace moment immediately followed by a lucy dacus song and expect me not to lose my mind#as soon as i saw the title i knew e6 was gonna have some sad shit because truth or dare is every aroace kid's worst nightmare lol#and btw e6 had THE soundtrack ever#wolf alice and lucy dacus and holly humberstone all in the same episode??!#AND MOST IMPORTANTLY e7 oh my god#i literally cried watching that one and i RARELY cry#but ok i won't keep talking i'll save it for a real post lol#anyway#representation matters and all that shit
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i apologize to all my mutuals i promise i will be normal but there is a part of me regressing to my 15 year old self reading an archived livejournal pete/key manifesto for the first time at 12am on a school night
#TO BE CLEAR i’m excited bc i love bang the doldrums and i never thought i’d hear a live version#but the fact that it’s today of all days. does make the rpf lore brain go brrr#actually it probably wasn’t even archived i think it was still up#but literally my memory is crystal clear of how i even learned it was a thing#my friends during class were joking about some post about fourth of july (the song) being about them#and i was silently like hmmm what’s this about#and when i got home that night i immediately looked it up#i distinctly remember it being one of the first times i stayed up on my laptop way too late lmao#i really only got deep into ryden when i first got into brandon stuff#(which was at the beginning of 2015 i was late to the party)#and i wasn’t really into mcr yet at that point anyway besides a few songs and like i knew who mikey was obviously#(i never got into other mcr rpf and now i’m an adult it’s too late to learn the Lore. i would not be normal)#anyway i also remember reading the ryden livejournal stuff but that was earlier. i just vividly remember hearing about petemikey#from people At School#anyway there’s no point to this i just like talking about myself#r.txt
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went to see the aces yesterday which first of all they were amazing it was my first time going to a concert w lesbian music and it was very special to me (also the lead singer was so sexy btw js 😩) but ANYWAY. i asked my friend if she wanted to go w me & she had never listened to them before but she said she would and i sent her some of their music to listen to etc etc. so like we went to the concert it was great and afterwards she told me she thought it was boring and she didn’t like the music. which was kind of crazy to me bc it’s like indie pop/rock music and like as someone who does not enjoy the majority of indie music bc i find it boring their music is not boring 😭 so first of all i find that offensive. second of all she was like well if you find a concert from x artists then i would enjoy that and she listed like three artists to me one of which was taylor swift and i was like. yeah where am i gonna get taylor swift tickets lmfao. but the other artist she listed (i don’t remember the third one she said lol) i just looked up his music and i’m legit like 😭😭😭 first of all this man looks like he just finished hibernating for the winter and crawled out of the cave into the sun for the first time in months. second of all. that’s also what his music sounded like. my point being that going to this man’s concert while he strums a single guitar in a flannel shirt and jeans would be a million times more boring than watching women having fun on stage and singing abt lesbianism idk call me crazy………it’s like i would find it more understandable if it was at LEAST interesting music………
#michelle speaks#& i said to her well you prob would’ve enjoyed it more if u knew the songs#& she looked at me like i was legit crazy & was like i knew the lyrics they repeated them#i was like. just bc you get what’s being said doesn’t mean you know the song like that’s not what i mean…..#like i’m sure i’d enjoy a concert of that man if i knew his songs at least even if i didn’t really like them#at least somewhat even if it wasn’t the best time of my life#bc part of what makes a concert fun is being able to sing along…..like ur going to at least enjoy it more if u do#also she did not like violet by hole. how do you as a woman not enjoy violet by hole. omggggggggg#but like u know if she didn’t like the music that’s fine like w/e but she was making it so obvious to me that she didn’t#like i was like what did u think and she was like um. it was good. u know. and i was like oh so you didn’t like it#& she immediately was like i didn’t want to say but it was so boring and i was like. ok. u didn’t have to actually.#it did just annoy me bc it’s like i really enjoyed it and she like immediately took me out of it w that…..#like instantly lost my post concert glow 😔#anyway tho she was wrong it was actually great & someone threw a lesbian flag on stage at some point & she was holding it#while singing a love song abt another woman & it meant so much to me 💞 my friend simply cannot understand……#also if u think i’m joking abt this man i was so shocked when i saw his spotify header i legit said no fucking way out loud 😭
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screaming myself hoarse til I pass out we were together during a very tumultuous time in our lives I will always have your back and be curious about you about your career your whereabouts!!!
#not about j we're good - about the friend who i haven't shut up about in the 14 years i've been on the hellsite#the fun part is that i know his forever career and his forever whereabouts and it will break my heart into shards for the rest of my life!#and goddamnit we weren't romantically together but instead together as part of a weirdly codependent friend group of four and we were#near identically weird and fucked up emotionally and in our humor and how we spoke and how we meshed and i will NEVER fucking get over it!!#i'm still agog that i sent you a last chance hail mary sort of letter like the lyrics in this song about how i think about you often and#have always believed in you and been rooting for you like all the rest of us who knew you before things got really bad because you were and#are such a fucking incredible person and musician and friend and so smart and creative and LOVABLE! i said that in the letter without#realizing alanis said that in one of THE best lost love songs of all goddamn time!#i wish i could tell you one more time - right now today immediately or better yet five years ago - how i have always loved and admired you#and everything about you. even now. all the way out here in iowa i am still loving you with everything i have in me every single day#knowing i will never speak to or see you again [i think about you all the time but i don't need the same] and i finally started to admit#that to myself and my friends and my therapist in 2021 and i'm more at peace with it than i ever was or thought i could be in 2019 and 2020#but i know it's gonna take my whole lifetime to get a grip on it and accept it. and it'll stop hurting one of these days. i know it will#i don't think i've ever loved a friend as much as I loved you. i think you were the best friend i've ever had#and that's one of the nastiest parts of it - we were good friends and you did seem to like me plenty#but i think i was the w-h-auden_morelovingone.txt by a mile. i was a weird obsessed stage 10 clinger.#and that's surely a large part of the dwelling and the fixation. if things had been more equal then maybe it'd be very different now.#guess i'll die because i sure ain't finding out!!#HELLO LOVES HAVE SOME RICH NUTRITIOUS ANNIE LORE ON THIS FINE FREEZING COLD SUNDAY AFTERNOON!#ann with an ie#<- this was a nightmare to type out and feel but i wanna keep it around for whenever i get the balls to talk about it in therapy again
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I've been using my down time at work to do a lot of reading lately, and a big part of that has been making my way through the works that VnC references, just for the fun of it.
I was going to start The Song of Roland a few days ago, but when I first looked at it, I just did not have the patience to deal with the sheer ~righteousness~ and pomp of a story about a bunch of eleventh century catholic knights.
HOWEVER, after making my way through a solid 80 pages of de Sade, I have to admit, those righteous catholic knights ended up looking pretty god damn appealing.
#had to switch from de sade to Roland solely for the sake of a fucking palette cleanser. bc. JEEZ#protip for anyone who thinks it's a good idea to read a de Sade novel between customers at their place of business:#don't!#or at the very least don't read fucking 120 days lmao#it's like.#I knew going in I was gonna have to bail out of reading it at work at some point once shit went full de Sade#but I figured (falsely) I could get through the introduction before that point#I also knew about and was braced for there being a lot of horrific assault#But I still wasn't expecting it to *start* with such an immediately insane level of brutality#and even more than that. I was not prepared for the sheer amount of literal FILTH and uncleanliness#anyway. if you ever want to read an 18th century frenchman describe several different people's permanently gaping unwashed asses#and the mass abduction and assault of dozens and dozens of teens and children#all within the first 60 pages of a novel#read de Sade#in other news the song of roland is pretty entertaining#about andie
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the best part abt being gay is recognizing the weather from a wtnv episode bc its already on ur liked songs<3
#high tide rising by fox was in Renovations .Who was going to tell me this.i nearly jumped out of my bed bc i was so suprised#SAME WITH MAL BLUM !! like i had some songs of his on my playlists and immediately knew it was their voice .mental illness#god not to mention tmg in epsiode 63/146 or ajj in episode 72#OH MY GOD HOW COULD I FORGET TWIN BEDS IN EPSIODE 199!EXPLODES#[<- i had been listenening to twin beds.specifically lonely impluse of delight for the past few months and to hear it in a wtnveps.was wild#a ghosts rambles
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I think I’ve figured out the reason that I didn’t vibe with Les Mis is that it’s a Musical For Men™️, whereas Phantom is a Musical For Mentally Ill and Horny Women, so it all makes sense now.
#If a woman had a personality in Les Mis she immediately died. Then there was Cosette#Idk I know it’s reflective of the time it was set but how it was presented still rang sexist#And there was no like characters? It was weird. A scene would open with thirty people singing and you knew none of them so why should I car#And there weren’t songs there was just a lot of singing if that makes sense#Like there was legit one scene where person number one I don’t know was like x character you have never heard of has died#And the thirty other characters I didn’t know were like somber silence and I was like I literally don’t care why should I how could I#And why did that Javert dude just randomly kill hi self? How anti climatic! I thought he and Jean Valjean were going to have some epic#final bitch off but no#And cosettes bf was so annoying. Why did Jean Valjean confess everything to him as opposed to idk his actual daughter?#Such Man energy#I really hope Les Mis tumblr doesn’t find me and bully me lol
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crying at work today bc i had a sudden realization about tenshi as i was retranslating aru sekai shoushitsu. noticed the word saisei used in both songs and had a thought. like. the whole rebirth type theme really does tie to her. its not just the umareyou mou ichido melody as lyrics at the end of the song its in the other lyrics as well its in the first ou line in aru sekai shoushitsu. she has something to do with this. so say she is the reason they get second chances. we also now get to answer the other question i had, which is if the other's are people and they can lose that and therefore no longer repeat, does tenshi have something to lose? and i dont like the answer i got. shoushitsu calls it a "major sin" and since she's an angel naturally theres going to be a punishment for that. we know the song starts with rain, and rain is our symbol for this whole calamity, both end and beginning of it, but it doesnt end with rain. it ends with the motif. it ends with the world going dark. at first i thought u know well yeah if u die in one world its going to go dark before u wake up in another. but i think this is different now. & i draw ur attention to the art again. the umbrella- she was a safeguard, but theres nothing left to it now. its useless essentially. shes sitting not standing, shes not fighting anymore. shes crying but she's also smiling- like shes made a decision she doesnt like, but shes sure of. i think she self sacrificed for them. she wanted to help, to give them a chance, but in doing so she passed limits she wasnt supposed to (similar to what happens in laboratory but more specific to her).
#aru sekai series#CAN I PLEASE HAVE ONE. O N E FAVE CHARACTER WHO LIVES. IN FUCKING ANYTHING#u dont understand this hit me in the MIDDLE of my shift and i immediately teared up#i love how im never right about her character but everything i discover something closer to the truth my opinion on her never changes#i dont believe in unconditional love but this might be the closest to it#I KNEW SHE WANTED TO HELP BUT IT WAS MUCH MORE TOLERABLE WHEN I THOUGHT SHE JUST. COULDNT.#THATS THERE WAS SOME BARRIER THAT STOPPED HER#but to think it could be. that nothing else worked. so she gave herself up.#i love walking into the end of the world series and being surprised when my heart gets ripped out#i dont think theres a single song in this series that doesnt give me a crisis when i actually think about it#i still have no idea how shes connected to apoptosis chara. but if their relationship is not causing problems for each other then What#i WILL find out#also spoilers but the secondary parts of the ou lines in shoushitsu are 100% referring to apoptosis#also hit me like a brick today#im back only to say this bc i already bothered emimin all day about it but i still havent processed it & need to yell about it
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