#in my defense it is a necessary infodump

[gilmores-glorious-blog]

do my homework?? nah.

infodump to my friend about sweeney todd???? hell yeah.

[choking-on-ice]

Laios gets a new perspective on Chilchuck's scars

it's done! I hope you like it!!

!! If you're interested in more scarred Chilchuck content, please check out the amazing fanfic by @turtles-allthewaydown aka smallwars on Ao3, "To The Dogs" right here !!

I started this comic and then while scrolling through tumblr I found their fic link and couldn't believe how on the same wavelength it was lol. My comic holds no relevancy to this fic, they just coincidentally have very similar themes. (Though i did add the canine bite scars inspired by the fic, so there's that)

(okay that's the imporatnt stuff, now a warning for infodump incoming abt my thoughts on scarred Chilchuck lore)

the fact that Halffoots would be used as bait for monsters has been haunting my brain since I heard it. All I could think about was how long Chilchuck has been an adventurer and how even the parties that didn't use halffoots as bait probably weren't that careful with them. Chilchuck gets so defensive about and is constantly reminding people that he doesn't fight, a habit that definitely didn't spring up outta nowhere, and we know he's gotten hurt and/or died plenty of times just disarming traps.

Falin is a talented healer, but not everyone is as good as her and scars would linger. Perhaps the healer wouldn't prioritize him because of their opinion of halffoots, or seeing picklocks as unnecessary. Or since healing is fueled by calories and Chilchuck canonically doesn't eat very much to remain underweight, his body is more difficult to fully heal. Thus >> more scars than the others

But Laios always saw Chilchuck as an equal, he saw picklocks as necessary, valued his skill, and respected his need to stay out of combat. So it probably wouldn't occur to him that other tallmen didn't behave that way, also him growing up around hunters who were scarred and being a fighter he'd probably not linger much on them at first.

Senshi would pick up on it right away though given he expects based on Chil's height that he's a kid.

[laiosynth]

new mk rarepair just dropped

johnny and kuai liang

i am calling them "scorchstar" or "scorpstar"

headcanons under the cut. if you even care /ref

johnny uses kuai as a personal heater. through cuddles or handholding, whatever is necessary.

kuai comes to watch johnny's shoots all the time, and he's so unobtrusive and kind while he's there that the crew assumes for a while he's another one of them who was hired and never introduced formally. johnny has to break the news to them when kuai stops showing up cuz he's on a mission.

johnny calls kuai both "my flame" and "sugar tits" interchangeably.

kuai calls johnny "star" or "my guiding star", along with "love" and "sweet" in casual conversation

johnny fell first, kuai fell harder.

when they first got the chance to talk outside of their mission for earthrealm/the timeline, kuai ended up infodumping on johnny for hours about the scientific and alchemical principals and concepts used to create and enchant the amulet that gives him his pyromancy. that's when johnny REALLY fell.

there was a whole scandal in hollywood when people noticed that johnny cage stopped flirting with anyone. he had to make a whole statement about it, which really pissed him off. it went along the lines of "fuck you guys. i dont have to tell you shit. bye !!!!"

kuai liang finds johnny being so defensive of his identity and privacy incredibly sweet.

they love to share little kisses. just sweet little super casual pecks. kuai's figured out that if he does it right, johnny will giggle/laugh, and he capitalizes on that a LOT.

i have more. i will share them if asked. (please ask)

thank you for reading goodbyeeee

[unsat-and-strange]

I figure rambles about world building should maybe not go in the tags of a completely unrelated post so uhhhh tbi yggdrasil! (I was going to draw the planets to go with this but I kinda haven't yet) (I'm realizing j wrote all of this in present tense so assume this is as things were just before the train arrived) *infodump mode: activate!!*

my basic idea is 9 planets obviously, 4 of them within the goldilocks zone and with naturally occurring life, and 5 naturally uninhabitable but with enough artificial modifications that people can and do live there. there are also a few small colonies on some of the dwarf planets and asteroids in the system, with hoddmimis being the only one outside of the farthest planet niflheims orbit. all the naturally habitable planets are self sustaining, can produce all the resources necessary to support their populations, but they have grown more dependent on trade between the planets during the centuries that interplanetary travel has existed. the colonized planets are much more reliant on trade, although all have been modified enough they could provide for basic needs (food, water, power, etc) for a while if supplies were cut off for some reason. a closer look at each planet:

this is getting long the rest is under the cut :)

muspelheim: closest planet to the sun, inhabitants live almost exclusively underground. some mining takes place here but since it's not nearly as rich as nidavellir mining isn't pushed as heavily. it does produce most of the fuel used in the system. one of the most well known disasters in yggdrasil history was when a mining mishap led to a fuel tank ruprure that took out 200 square miles of space in a single explosion and started fires that raged for nearly a year. also notable for hosting the training grounds for the Asgard defense unit before it was phased out, replaced by the yggdrasil early alert force. at one point a few centuries before the planets were unified under Asgard, muspelheim got in a war with Niflheim. it would have been forced to a stop within a few decades since this was when Niflheim was the closest to the sun as it gets in it's orbit and after a few decades the two planets would be far enough apart to no longer justify the spent resources, but Asgard kindly put a stop to the conflict early by taking over both planets.

nidavellir: next furthest out. nidavellir is the site of many of the factories in yggdrasil. each planet has its own industrial district for (relatively) local products, but for big, expensive, heavy duty, or dangerous stuff such as spacecraft, heavy machinery, or weapons, it's nearly always made on nidavellir. safety standards were kind of shit during Odin's era but after the ratatosk express disappeared the citizens took the opportunity to set up stricter regulations. it was first settled for the pre in the crust, and is still mined centuries later. a method of extracting iron from the core is in development, but there is serious pushback since no one is sure how that would affect the planet and it's magnetic field in the long run. nidavellir is denser than earth and while it has no natural inhabitants, enough generations have passed on this planet that the people have somewhat adapted. they tend to be shorter and can take higher temperatures than humans could.

hel: the first planet outside of the goldilocks zone that was settled. at the start people mostly went there to prove they could, to show living beings could conquer an uninhabitable world, but at the time they hadn't figured out how to set up truly long lasting infrastructure in a way that would allow them to have a large population on a new planet, so population remained relatively low. when Asgard started taking over, they saw the amount of space available and decided hel would be a lovely place to put everyone who disagreed with the glory of Asgardian rule

and thus begins the handful of habitable planets

vanaheim: a gas giant in a twin planet rotation with asgard. they were the first two planets to make contact with each other. they went to war a few times but have been on good terms for centuries. vanaheims inhabitants, the vanir, live either on small moons in very close orbit or on floating cities suspended in the planet. the planet has a very scientific mindset and is the center for a lot of the research and development in the system, as well as home to some of the top universities. while Asgard was where the bifrost was constructed and tested, vanaheim was where much of the fundamental research was done. the vanir are winged and somewhat reptilian, they can reproduce asexually if necessary, tend to be slightly carnivorous, and usually have large family units (polyamory win!)

Asgard: even after Asgardian rule was overturned it is still seen as a cultural capital of sorts. it was home to the entire government setup during Asgard's rule, including the shoddy attempt at a senate set up to convince the people of other planets they had some representation. after the train, there was a complete restructuring of most of the government and the locations were shifted over to midgard as it was more central to the whole system. Asgard is smaller than earth, the inhabitants are Tall. aside from that visibly similar to humans with the exception of pointed ears and bigger eyes

midgard: fairly similar to earth actually. it's the center of a lot of trade and sees a lot of intercultural activity since it's one of the most central planets at the moment (when the outer planets hit the other end of their orbit it will probably change). midgard has a lot of forests, and it's oceans are warmer because there is a lot of underwater volcanic activity. midgardians could be mistaken for humans except for pointed ears and better flexibility. if a midgardian can't do the spilts they are looked down on.

jotunheim: the coldest habitable world. it's inhabitants are tall and blue and can handle much colder temperatures. they tend to be good problem solvers. jotunn music and cuisine are both becoming increasingly popular. it has a bit of a bad reputation for crime in some spots but really so does every planet, Jotunheim just happened to be dragged into the spotlight for it. the Jotunheim equivalent of noir detective is a very popular character archetype.

the cold planets:

alfheim: home of a lot of data processors and storage centers, the cold makes it cheaper to run them at such high capacities. in Odin's reign Freyr was the governor of alfheim, he was born into an influential family on vanaheim and basically bought the position.

niflheim: a gas giant similar to vanaheim. most of its inhabitants live on the moons surrounding it, with only the biggest cities floating in the planet itself. during the war with muspelheim a war hero named ymir made a name for himself evacuating people from a moon just before it was destroyed by muspelheim missles. he died doing the same thing and Asgard very quickly snatched up the story and used it to promote a unified yggdrasil under Asgardian rule. the rebels on Niflheim were very vocal about ymirs story getting justice, not just being the face of a dictatorship.

that's all nine. phew. look at me making up history for a fictional solar system :) ask any questions you want, I'd love to come up with more about this

[katgn-cat-ink]

((I heard 'g1 cartoon' and physically could not resist, so...)) ✨ Ratchet x Wheeljack?

Hello! I hope you'll like this! (It took really a lot of time to write this… And it’s not as short as I wanted it to be, haha. Sorry, if there is a huge amount of infodumping! It’s my first time writing this kind of stuff! Tell me if something bothers you!) 

Well, let’s begin! It’s time to meet… Coupling! ʳᵉᶠ 

First of all, a little question: “If both parents are scientists, will their child be one too?” Well… Hell, no. This sparkling would have a lot of potential in the science field, but it would be used only in the case of helping his creators, and everything science-y would be as a mere hobby, nothing serious. Coupling would be quite sure about his first-aid skills (Thanks, Ratchet!) and some of his tech/mechanic skills, which Wheeljack would give him. Still, he would be more interested in programming and operating machines in a more trivial way, probably working in some kind of factory (note: I hc a lot of tech facilities are quite autonomous and need only a few bots to work in it) to check and maintain them. He would like this job, for which he would finish “school” and “tech university” with good marks. 

There is chance Coupling would help Wheeljack build a special device to inspect bots’ memories for police to use. He also might try to experiment with bots’ creation and get himself, well… A sparkling.

That was about his abilities and professional choice, but what about Coupling himself?

He would be quite a nice person, but a little too… Moralfag about working ethics. It’s so bad to a point, he genuinely would think you shouldn’t let your emotions flow into your work (especially if you’re related to a bot-to-bot type speciality) in any way. He can start to bark at someone if they try to talk to him about anything.

— I think you should also cut back on staying so late. You recharge less than necessary. — says a medic who happened to look at his recharge records by accident.

— I think you should just repair my hand and frag off. — says Coupling, grinding his dentaplates.

You can guess how much he would argue with his parent, Ratchet. As he would grow up, seeing how Ratchet (being often a little annoyed with his patients) and Wheeljack (who is often overexcited about his inventions) work would be a key to the appearance of this part of his character. [He would become calmer and less like this, meeting more and more bots like Ratchet and Wheeljack. Especially a sparkling of Skyfire and Starsream who is a medic would help if she existed in that timeline. She would cry, and through her tears she would still operate on a patient correctly, making no mistakes. That would… surprise Coupling.]

Coupling would say “no!” to any kind of non-defensive violence. Maybe because of never physically fighting anyone he would excessively talk trash, even being quite phlegmatic. He would appear to be constantly irritated with something or someone, but in most cases he wouldn't care. But he would be really sensitive about family and friends. He would have felt bad for his disinterest in science for a long time until this disfunctional family talked about it. …And he would be in his dark teenage phase with big and sudden outbursts of low self-esteem for an awful amount of time. [A sparkling of Hoist and Grapple would be a part of “annoyed” duo of (them) and Coupling in a timeline, where (they) existed.]

Coupling would love his creators really much. He would argue with them quite often, but they would still be a loving family. <3 He would cherish his friends and help them if needed. Perhaps he would find himself a conjunx endura, being much older than I described. If he was created during the war, he would totally be an autobot. Coupling would look like this… If we consider Ratchet is taller than Wheeljack (this is from official scales, I believe) then he would be the middle one between them. His head helmet would be similiar to Ratchet’s, but Coupling wouldn’t have his chevron, having Wheeljack’s headlights. However, Coupling’s headlights can be hidden in contrary to Wheeljack’s. There are four little headlights, a pair on each side of head, looking like horns. They light up when he speaks and can change color depending on his mood. There are colors for negative emotions (anger, despair, sickness, etc.), but he turned the color changing for these emotions off. His initial frame colors would be close to Ratchet’s (white) with some green lines from Wheeljack. He would be mostly broad, like Ratchet, having a big alt-form, and have a little pistol built in his left forearm.

His voice actor would be Troy Baker (as Eikichi Mishina in Persona 2) and his theme would be Zweitestock from Ever17 -the out of infinity-.

(He might become a canon character of my fic, because I have so many ideas for him already, haha.)

Thank you for reading!!!

Some notes:

I base fankids AU in a g1 cartoon and IDW mix. The plot is from g1 cartoon, but some terms and physical features I take from IDW comics. For example, a usage of “conjunx endura”.

Everything with an appearance of fankids would happen after the war had ended. Also, there would be a lot of changes in society.

So a big hc time: Sparklings are “born“ in a result of merging two or more (sires’ and carrier’s) copies of “genetic code” from creators’ sparks, which they generate with help of a special reproductive device near their sparks. This reference sheet of future creators’ codes is stored near carrier’s spark in the reproductive device. Carrier’s system analyses the reference sheet and decides which value from which creator goes to which “variable” of the sparkling’s “genetic code”. Then a finished code is turned into a spark, and it is put into a protoform (or a ready frame) which becomes a bot.

…for which he would finish “school” and “tech university” with good marks… — I’m not really sure how to make an education system work in cybertronian culture. I thought it would be affected by humans’ and other aliens’ schools and colleges, but I don’t have a clear picture of it still. So for now you can just assume his level of knowledge by knowing which human education institutions he would have ended.

[A sparkling of Hoist and Grapple would be a part of “annoyed” duo of (them) and Coupling in a timeline, where (they) existed.] — I referred to Hoist and Grapple’s spark as “they” in brackets, because I only had an idea of interaction and not of a character, and so I don’t know which gender they have for now.

Everything in square brackets — indicates what can happen and not, which is depended on an existence of some character.

[florvinhara]

n sewell's skincare routine

ok ok this concept would not leave my mind so! some products i think N would like/wear! (thanks to @agentnatesewell for always supporting me on this train of thought snshsjhwjs)

like lets just imagine N explaining their skincare process step by step, gently applying their luxury products to the detectives face... the soothing n careful n loving way they would go about it... i'll show myself out now

*(quick disclaimer- the best skincare routine is the one that works for YOU and makes you feel comfortable/happy!! below is like... a very involved example that's entirely for fun/me to infodump sndbsksh and its not by any means the 'necessary' or 'right' process!)*

1. Cleanser!

Lotus Glow Cleansing Balm by Beautycounter- you're supposed to gently massage this onto your face so... N Sewell pls come tenderly stroke ur detective's cheeks to apply 🥺 anyway the lotus extract and jojoba seed oil are rlly good for brightening and nourishing your skin!

2. Toner!

Eau Roma Water by Lush- simple, calm, and soothing; a rose water and lavender blend that leaves your skin feeling soft and refreshed 😌

3. Serum/Oil!

(okay let's think about this... N carefully tapping serum onto the detective's face... giving them a playful boop on the nose... 🥺)

Squalane + Vitamin C Rose Oil by Biossance- squalane protects your skin barrier while vitamin C gives you a radiant supple glow

4. Eye Cream!

(at this point i would like to invite you to imagine N gently tipping the detective's chin up and very carefully sweeping their thumbs under the detective's eyes)

Superfood Hydrate + Firm Peptide Eye Cream by Youth to the People- kale provides Nutrients while aloe soothes skin, sunflower oil reduces inflammation

(bonus: Bubblewrap by Glossier SPECIFICALLY bc it can also be used on your lips... so like... N running their fingertips over the detective's lips to apply it... and it would be a shame to use more than they have to, right? oh well... guess we should share... 😳 [brief pause for kisses])

5. Moisturizer!

Honey Drop Lightweight Moisturizer by Farmacy- honey nourishes and moisturizes skin, and is also a great antioxidant, while cupuaçu butter beads soften skin

6. Sunscreen!

Umbra Sheer Physical Daily Defense by Drunk Elephant- vampires... i dont think get sun damage? either way sunscreen is v important! this one is also packed with antioxidants and is gentle enough for sensitive skin

7. Bonus- Cologne/Perfume!

Noire de Mai by Veronique Gabai- "it blooms at noon, full of color, drenched with sun, almost intoxicating if it was not for the breezy air that always refreshes it. but there is always more..." like first of all... N SEWELL. notes include bergamot, rose, pink pepper, and amber. it's a light scent with hints of sharper/darker, "more sensual" undertones for N "delicious, isnt it" Sewell

Cape Heartache by Imaginary Authors- "... the lone American contribution to Philip Sava's wildly popular series of exploration novels... like a scarf, wear the Cape Heartache scent in the fall and winter and observe how people gravitate to your warmth." inspired by a book... 👀 notes include douglas fir, pine resin, and vanilla leaf. it's a natural, woodsy smell but with sweeter middle/base notes for that cosy warmth i associate with N!

Alien by Mugler- "it exudes a positive energy, charged with sensual and intriguing mystery... a sensation- the moment that occurs before a miracle. there is silence, fullness, and an expectancy of the supernatural" idk how to describe it but people wearing this just emit a Vibe that reminds me of N. notes include sambac jasmine, cashmeran wood, and ambergris. it's unusual and surprising in a way that keeps you guessing!

[leap-loves]

⭐ <3

Infodump Time!

Vegeta o’clock!!!

(Quick note: I chose this gif because Vegeta’s in the rain, and my s/i’s name is Raine, and yeah XD)

Okay so!!! Another platonic one!!! Where I say ‘screw the timelines I do my own thing!’ XD

But Vegeta! Prince of all Saiyans! What...few are left. He’s aggressive and hot headed and violent and harsh, egotistical, he thinks he is the shit. Because until he hit Earth he pretty much was. And I used to absolutely love him, even the first time I watched DBZ as a kid. I wanted to be his friend SO BAD because he was SO COOL. Even though I know he’d be more likely to kick my ass in a heartbeat. But his character development through the series, learning to care for Earth and to love Bulma and his MY BABY BOY scene (Was that just DBZA or canon? I don’t remember. POINT STILL STANDS! I think of DBZA Vegeta most of the time anyways XD), it’s just.... so good to me. And I love it. 

So the idea with him is that he finds out about the idea of tattoos, permanent designs and works of art imbedded in his skin. And he loves it. So he does his research, or has Bulma do the research for him, and finds out about my girl Raine’s shop. Good reviews because she’s a good artist, respectful and polite, everyone’s satisfied with her work. So he goes to see her. She recognizes him from the attack of the Saiyans way before, but just treats him as a normal customer. Answers all his questions, willing to go through as many revisions as necessary to make sure it’s exactly what he wants, especially since he includes some Saiyan imagery and writing, and explains as much. 

She’s pleasant company, never demeaning. And she will boss him around only enough to get her job done. And once she starts he realizes that tattoos actually hurt, not near as much as some of the stuff he’s been through, but definitely hurts for normal humans like her. And she has multiple tattoos. So she becomes his go-to for tattoos, since she also learns to find ways to accommodate him buffing up in his different forms (Super saiyan and beyond) without the tattoos looking terrible or anything. And he gets attached. His human now. It kind of freaks out the Z-warriors a bit that she’s more comfortable around Vegeta than any of the others there. Then again, considering he’s helped her once or twice with unruly patrons, and he tends to go there when Bulma kicks him out to be social, it makes a little bit more sense. Then that sense goes out the window once he starts trying to train her to fight and use ki and everything. Mostly because she wanted to learn to fly like him too, and he figured might as well teach her self defense in the process. Just... Saiyan self-defense.

[slanax]

Big ol’ infodump post for Conquest (Lunatic) and how to survive it

(because @xpegasusuniverse asked and I ain’t letting an opportunity to infodump slip by)

Part 1/?: General strategies and earlygame

*cracks knuckles*

Overall, all of this is naturally just a suggestion, not the only way you could ever play Conquest. Especially on modes below Lunatic, you definitely don’t need to follow it to a T to still beat the game, but it’s what I found works best for me (and I played this mode an unhealthy amount :P)

- You’ll want Corrin to be female (you want Jakob earlygame for the insane Def and Avo boost to the avatar that his personal provides) with a Speed boon (Quick) and a Luck bane (Unlucky). Speed is the best stat, and Luck is both the least important and the easiest to patch up because you get a Goddess Icon pre-route split that should fix her Luck for most if not all of the game.

- For her talent, I’ve had the best experiences with Fighter to go Hero later. Generally, you’ll want to stay in the Nohr Noble line until Lv5 promoted to grab Draconic Hex, then switch to a sword class of your preference. I personally find Fighter!Hero to be better than Merc!Hero for its skills; other options include Swordmaster and Paladin. Lategame (one chapter in particular) has a lot of effective weapons that you need to tank though, and your other two main tanks will likely be Xander and Benny, so a regular old infantry class can be beneficial to not get completely screwed by beastkillers and hammers. Hero has a nice balance of good Str, Spd and Def (especially with the Fighter’s HP+5 and its own Sol helping out its bulk) and Axebreaker is great for reliably tanking otherwise risky Berserkers. They can’t crit what they can’t hit.

- For her spouse I usually end up with Jakob (mainly because I tend to want the extra paralogues for EXP and support points) though as her mid to lategame support unit I’ve come to appreciate Gunter a lot, especially reclassed to a Wyvern Lord. Str, Def and Mov on pairup is great, the ability to ferry her quickly thanks to being a flier is awesome, and his personal giving you +15 Hit and +3 damage is a huge boost to her offense. It also means that the Fighter’s Gamble skill amounts to a free +10 Crit since the Hit penalty just gets eaten up by Gunter’s personal. I ended up ditching her Dragon Fang for more Sol procs (the game rolls for Dragon Fang first, so if it procs you can’t proc Sol, and I want Sol procs for more bulk) and using Gamble crits as my “offensive skill”

- Early on, Silas is your best friend. His personal gives him +3/+3 to attack and defense if the avatar is below half health, so just start killing things with her and as soon as she is weakened (or heck, deliberately get her a little banged up) have Silas take over. As soon as they have a C support, you can also pair them up to stack his personal with the avatar’s, giving him a total of +5/+5 and humiliating the game even on Lunatic. I affectionately refer to it as “Juggernaut Mode”. Just make sure to start working on his lance rank ASAP for Javelin utility.

- Make use of Elise! Her personal is incredibly useful at keeping you alive, giving you a huge defense buff if you keep her adjacent to your frontline fighters (watch for ranged enemies though ofc, she is very squishy and can easily get oneshotted) Make sure to have her heal a lot so she hits Lv10 by Chapter 10, early promoting her to Strategist for that is immensely useful.

- Use. Mozu. Bring a Heart Seal and a Bronze Bow to her paralogue, change her to Archer and start training her right there. Baiting enemies with Silas and finishing them off with Mozu by dual striking off him usually works, though depending on levelups Jakob might have to throw a dagger too. Generally, she’s reasonably easy to bring up to speed and once she’s there she’s awesome. Plus, you get so few bow users in Conquest that you’ll want to make use of every single one you can get.

- Speaking of which, Niles. You want to train him too, because Capture is super valuable in Lunatic. The Ch9 boss has Rally Def which is amazingly useful, the boss of Forrest’s paralogue is a Berserker with S axes and Certain Blow, and that’s only the beginning. Plus, bows. You want bows because Fates bows are great and there’s so many places where effective anti-air will save your butt.

- Don’t break any of your Rescue staves. Ever. Trust me on this. Use their first charge if absolutely necessary, but don’t break them.

- General strategy is to low-man with few well-trained units and use leftover deployment slots for pure pairup units and supports like healers or Rally skill users. Watch for enemy skills at all times, and learn to fear the Lunge icon. For help with any specific chapters, let me know where you’re struggling. (Note: Towards endgame, this will naturally shift in favor of more combat units as you get more characters that can kill things really really well. You’ll still usually bring at least a few pure support units all the way to the end though.)

And finally, here’s a quick rundown of the pairings I found to work really well:

- Avatar x Jakob, with Gunter later replacing him as your support of choice. See above.

- Effie x Arthur. Easy to achieve because Effie will see a lot of use early on and Arthur makes a good support unit for her. Percy’s paralogue gives a lot of cash and tbh that’s all you need this pairing for.

- Elise x Odin: Basically, Ophelia’s paralogue gives you several exclusive tomes, all of them are stupidly useful, and you want them. Just have Odin deal some chip damage adjacent to Elise, and pair them up once Elise early promotes. Of all my pairings this one is the biggest hassle to get done in a timely manner (so you don’t waste a recruitment slot on Odin for too long bc he really isn’t all that great) but for the tomes it’s well worth it.

- Niles x Mozu: For two reasons. One, Nina can inherit Quick Draw and that’s awesome. Two, Mozu can partner seal into Bow Knight. You can have her grab Shurikenbreaker (and Mov+1) and then have her go back to Sniper. Trust me, you want Shurikenbreaker. You don’t know it yet, but you want it. With her and Nina (I like Niles in Adventurer to make more use of his magic potential with the Shining Bow) you’ll have two Shurikenbreaker units, and they come very much in handy during one specific lategame chapter.

- Camilla x Benny: Mobility and getting ferried for Benny, hella bulk for Camilla. A filler pairing tbh since they don’t get any fancy skills or classes out of it, but they work well stat wise.

- Kaze x Azura: Now this is a pure filler pairing. Azura generates free support points, Midori’s paralogue gives dank herb, Shigure is a free Rally Spd bot, you don’t need them for anything else, ‘nuff said.

- Leo x Felicia: Magic and Speed for Leo, Demoiselle for Forrest. Felicia herself is pure support.

- Xander x Charlotte: Xander with the ability to Partner Seal into Hero for skills. Xander with Sol. Self-sustaining wall. Need I say more?

That’s all the pairings I usually do, I believe. There’s still a few unpaired characters, but that’s mostly because deployment slots are scarce and I don’t want to bring all their would-be partners along just to get supports.

Also, I did write up a guide for the whole thing way back when. It’s terribly outdated in places (+Def Swordmaster Corrin, what was I thinking) but most of it should still work as a good guideline (heck, I even use parts of it myself, if only for the tried and tested reinforcement listings) Rule of thumb: If this post contradicts the old guide, listen to this instead of the year-old guide. I was young and foolish :P

You can find it here.

[shaydh]

Valdir’s Profile Thing

Updated infodump about Valdir because @mrs-cheese asked for it and the previous one was from two years ago and I revised/added stuff. This is mostly me scrambling to reconcile my story with all the canon I broke by deciding to play a special snowflake drow Bhaalspawn  ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Valdir Telsaerryn Neutral evil drow sorcerer 

Stats:

Str: 10

Dex: 18

Con: 16

Int: 14

Wis: 10

Cha: 18

(Useless information because BG stats are just a ton of rerolling, except I suppose it means he’s pretty sturdy for a caster. His top three stats are cha, con, and dex)

Relations:

BG1 party members: Imoen, Montaron, Xzar, Dorn, Viconia

BG2 party members: Imoen, Dorn, Viconia, Korgan, Sarevok, Edwin, Hexxat

Generally refuses to associate with surface elves and doesn’t like having them in his party.

Romances Dorn. Will only romance male characters of a non-good alignment that are not elves, halflings, or gnomes.

Tends to be very slightly more respectful/less shitty towards female characters due to drow culture.

Some more random info:

Age: ~135 at the beginning of BG1

Height: 171 cm (5′7″)

Voiceclaim: Yaevinn in Witcher 1

His eyes and teeth aren’t naturally like that, he had it done with some kind of polymorph spell or eyeball tattoos or whatever don’t question it too much I just wanted to draw him like that

Mostly only knows offensive spells, especially if they set people on fire. It takes him a lot of effort to learn non-evocation spells so he only focused on a few defensive spells.

His weapons of choice are daggers and crossbows.

Background:

His mother was a low-ranked commoner, formerly an assassin who had lost the favor of Lolth. She willingly bore Bhaal’s child, wanting to do anything she could to spite Lolth’s clerics. She managed to arrange for Valdir to become a ward of the noble House Auvryani, but she gave her life for that opportunity.  Valdir was sent to one of Ched Nasad’s wizard guilds for training.

After he graduated, Valdir stayed with House Auvryani until it was defeated in a war with House Telsaerryn. Upon finding him and killing off the last noble Auvryani, Matron Mother Iraedra offered to recruit Valdir, intrigued by his determination and perhaps sensing something of his divine heritage. He accepted.

Valdir became the house wizard and eventually the patron of House Telsaerryn, and so he attained a noble title. He had a long-standing rivalry with former patron and weapons master Kelaszar, which the Matron Mother encouraged, as she considered it a way to keep both of them from becoming complacent in their rank (and also it was pretty funny to watch).

Eventually, one of Valdir and Kelas’ disagreements nearly led to the downfall of their house, and Iraedra decided it was too much of a liability to keep both around. She sent both of them to join an allied house’s Surface raiding party as punishment, fully expecting that one would kill the other sometime during the journey.

Their target was an elven village/shrine. Unfortunately, they were spotted by a few Harpers (Gorion among them) who happened to be in the area. The elves were given enough warning to drive the raiding party back without too much bloodshed. (Just for fun: If Valdir were a joinable NPC instead of the PC, his personal quest would involve going back and wiping out the whole village. Because he’s petty like that.)

Kelas saw his chance and stabbed Valdir in the back while he was finishing off some guards, but Valdir managed to avoid a fatal strike. Their fight was interrupted by the arrival of several Harpers, and Kelas fled, assuming that Valdir would either bleed out or be finished off by the reinforcements.

The Harpers kept Valdir alive to interrogate him about the location of the Underdark tunnel the raiding party had used so that it could be sealed off. It was a very short interrogation. Valdir told them willingly, not feeling any particular loyalty to this particular party (because they weren’t his soldiers) and hoping that Kelas would be killed by the pursuing elves.

Once Gorion (somehow) realized he was a child of Bhaal, he took Valdir back to Candlekeep as a captive. For reasons. (Incidentally, Abdel Adrian existed in this timeline! He was the one Gorion found as a baby and brought back to Candlekeep but he died of a fever as a child. Because fuck that guy.)

Valdir was held in a magically warded room in a relatively remote part of the Keep, and had several geas placed on him. One prevented him from harming anyone in Candlekeep and one prevented him from casting any magic. He resented the second one the most. Initially, he refused to speak to Gorion, aside from demanding to be released or asking Gorion to explain why he had been captured rather than killed, but after a few months of solitude he was bored and antsy enough that he told Gorion about his past, albeit very rudely, thus confirming Gorion’s suspicions about his Bhaalspawn heritage.

Valdir was allowed to borrow books from the library, and he spent a great deal of time reading since he had nothing better to do. His speech in Common is quite formal since he mostly learned from books and speaking with Gorion. His speech is more casual in Drow, and he swears more.

Imoen was forbidden from visiting him, so of course she went and pestered him endlessly. Valdir found her very irritating at first, but since she was one of the few people who would talk to him, he grew accustomed to her. He ended up developing a certain fondness for her (he started off seeing her as a small annoying pet, but by BG2 he actually started caring about her, not that he would admit it). At Candlekeep, he would sometimes indirectly aid her in pulling pranks because he was bored and it would cause trouble for Gorion (though he would deny any involvement because drow do not engage in such childish antics).

After a year or so of reasonably good behavior, Valdir was allowed out of his room and was free to wander the grounds, though Gorion warned him he’d be locked up again if he caused any trouble. Valdir mostly kept to himself. The other residents treated him with suspicion at first, and he was unpleasant enough that he never made any real friends (though he ended up becoming acquainted with most of the named characters anyway).

He stayed at Candlekeep for nearly three years. At the start of BG1, Gorion gave him a pendant enchanted with a Disguise spell so that he wouldn’t be persecuted for being a drow. Valdir was extremely offended that he had to disguise himself as a surface elf, but Gorion threatened to leave him behind until he agreed. He uses the pendant only when absolutely necessary, usually when passing through small villages when he decides it’d be too much trouble to reveal his race. (Basically me handwaving why he doesn’t get as much shit for being a drow as Viconia… Just don’t think too hard about it.)

After Gorion died, he didn’t intend to follow his instructions at first. The geas sealing his magic faded, though his power returned gradually (meaning time to level up!) Imoen insisted that they go to the Friendly Arm Inn anyway, pointing out that he had no allies on the surface, little understanding of surface customs, and he’d probably get killed by the first group of Flaming Fist mercenaries he saw. Reluctantly, he agreed to travel with her, and though he complained about everything on the surface (the sun, the iblith, the lack of decent baths!) he started to enjoy not having to answer to any priestesses. He had a vague goal of finding and killing Sarevok, mostly because he was annoyed at Sarevok killstealing Gorion from him. He became much more invested in the quest once he found out he was a Bhaalspawn and he decided to become a god.

[hyperbolicpurple]

Wheel of Time read: The Eye of the World

a recap/reactions post for @veliseraptor, whose love for these gigantic doorstoppers convinced me to read them, and @innermostplanet, whose reaction to hearing I am completely unspoiled for this series was, I believe, “dis gun be good”

(anyone feel free to comment or reply, but please don’t spoil me for what I haven’t yet read, please!)

Well, it’s pretty obvious why this is considered such a prime example of Western epic fantasy. Boy + mysterious lineage/sword/destiny + quest = a pretty straightforward formula, lol. Fortunately I’m down.

It’s sooooooo verboooooooose, like, even just at the sentence level I wanted to take a pen to it and hack away at it, but were all of those chapters really necessary, couldn’t they be recapped??? A pretty mild complaint though. I breezed through it so obviously it wasn’t so bad.

My other complaint: WHY ARE WE CALLING ANYTHING A “MYRDDRAAL” WHEN WE CAN JUST CALL IT A “FADE” AND WE ALREADY DO? Robert. Robert. My buddy. My pal. This is unnecessary.

(They’re also apparently called Halfmen, like come on, just give them one name, it’s OK.)

ONTO THE POSITIVE:

Characters I liked most: Min, whom we saw for like two seconds (and who just likes to word vomit her visions to total randos in convenient prophetic infodumps, I guess, lol); Nynaeve, who is delightfully prickly; and Lan and Perrin. I can resist neither guys described as wolfish nor guys who commune with wolves. Apparently.

(I feel like there’s an Aes Sedai/Warder AU out there waiting to be written about Daenerys/Jon, yeah? Would that not be a perfect fit?)

I can’t believe no one was dead by the end of this book? Like, for sure, I was expecting Mat to kick it and maybe Perrin too (since they seemed like such “extras,” Rand being Ba’alzamon’s obvious “real” target). BUT NO, THEY’RE ALL SPECIAL DUDES WITH SPECIAL POWERS AND DESTINIES, lmao. (Mat really did seem destined for the chopping block, though. You don’t steal magical artifacts from demons and lie about it, kid! The paranoia and antisocialness was some serious One Ring shit.) Even Thom apparently isn’t dead??? Or Rand’s dad??? Can no one actually die??? AND OBVIOUSLY Nynaeve and Egwene are both potentially powerful Aes Sedai too.

I really did not understand the Rand/Egwene relationship? At the beginning I got the impression they’d been ~maybe something~ in the past but Rand was backing away/wanting to call it off, and now they’re totally in love but doomed to be apart? I don’t know?

Did like Nynaeve/Lan, and CALLED IT, her weirdness around him was 100% “I am subconsciously attracted to this guy and aggravated by it,” haha. Also he thinks she deserves better than him and his inevitable death, and he said, I quote, “I will hate the man you choose because he is not me, and love him if he makes you smile,” and fuck you dude, now I love you, so naturally I’m all aboard that angst train. Toot toot!

SUCH a tonal difference from ASOIAF. Like, I was hit over the head by how many over-friendly over-generous innkeepers just love to give our heroes a helping hand and how many people like to stand up and give beautiful heartfelt speeches in defense of whoever the mob is attacking, etc. Also that was such a rosy picture of small town life. Sure, they’re all fond of each other and so good-hearted and who doesn’t love a wholesome country boy but omg I feel like I need to read a Stephen King book to cancel it out??? I don’t need everything to be as cynically crapsack as Westeros, but it did strain credulity juuuuuuust a little, lol.

And obviously Rand is an Aes Sedai too. Also successfully called! Not that it was hard, given the fainting and shaking spell after obviously performing some kind of magic not long after we were told that was a thing. And an “Aielman,” whatever that is. And the actual Dragon Reborn, whoever that is, as opposed to all the fake ones hanging around. (I wonder if we’ll see Logain again?) Since I doubt Rand will actually go insane (though that would be an interesting road for a protagonist to take) I assume they’re going to figure some way out of it. Either fix the “male” side of the power or be cut off from the power without the shitty side effects, or, I guess, access the “female” side of the power instead?

And there was a big tree dude who was all connected to the earth and some traveling pacifists (whom I liked very much) and some royal progeny in a garden. It really seems like we’ll see the royal progeny again, although again, I’m laughing about how apparently GOOD AND WHOLESOME those kids are.

(again, please don’t spoil me)

Next Posts: The Great Hunt