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bigskydreaming · 4 years ago

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Hi! I’m confused on how to reconcile dick’s origins and his loving family with the haly’s circus is a tool of the court of owls info. How does dick’s childhood not become horrifying and fake if the court of owls were using the circus the whole time? Ppl that dick knew and friends with were probably evil right? Idk... have a great day, sorry for my rant lol-confused anon

Honestly, as many times as the circus comes up in canon, its very rarely been explored in detail so it really just depends on how you play it, I think. For me, the difference is complicitness. If the Court of Owls is heavily invested in Haly’s Circus and manipulates where they go and when and uses it as a training camp for their future assassins in a lot of ways, that unmistakably casts a pall over Dick’s childhood, it lends it a certain air of grim destiny....BUT that doesn’t have to equate to his childhood being a LIE....not if most of the people he loves and values from it were just genuinely good people who loved him and had no idea about the darker side of their circus. I think most of Haly’s performers had no clue, or don’t have to be portrayed as having one, and thus just because they were there, doesn’t mean they were complicit, and if they weren’t complicit, that’s what really matters when it comes to them.

That said, we know that numerous performers died young under mysterious circumstances, or disappeared when in their teens, and that these were the eventual Talons of the Court. BUT we also know that the Court wasn’t like....disappearing multiple performers at a time, and that the real secret of the Talons’ large numbers is their longevity and the fact that the Court had been doing this for a LONG time. So its not like Haly’s performers would have all been oblivious to a lot of their number just vanishing under mysterious circumstances, its more that the scarcity of it happening means it could very easily for a lot of the performers Dick knew as a child, been like, their own personal urban legend? Like, there’s an awareness that there’s something spooky or creepy associated with the circus, but not what exactly it is or why its that way, and there’s just enough deniability to it that for most performers, their personal reasons for staying with the circus outweighed the occasional reminder of this potentially creepy side of things, as a reason for them to leave.

I could easily see this playing into like, superstitions about Gotham in general, because performers who’d been with the circus their whole life or a long time or just had a stronger awareness of the disappearances in their history could’ve like, identified that these mysterious deaths or disappearances only seemed to happen when the circus went to Gotham, and like.....maybe there wasn’t enough info to know what it MEANT, exactly, or maybe some of them had connected some dots and had SUSPICIONS about it maybe having something to do with the creepy rhyme they heard when they were in Gotham once, about the Court of Owls, but without being sure who was safe to talk about this with, nobody ever really explored that idea in depth.....like, its one of those things where I feel like it could’ve been that the disappearances and ideas people had about what was behind them and all that, it was a Big Unsaid. Something that was present and there throughout the atmosphere of Haly’s at times, especially for older members of the troupes, but nobody really ever talked about it because just because they knew something was going on there doesn’t mean they knew what to SAY about it, or to whom....and these are the kinds of undercurrents that as a kid, Dick would likely have been oblivious to....or only aware of in hindsight.

Like, I could see him years later reflecting on how now that he thought about it, the others always got weird and nervous about shows in Gotham or even the possibility of them, and nobody seemed to like Gotham for some reason, but he never knew WHY....and then when his parents were killed, that could have very easily slotted into just like....affirming that vague idea of ‘only bad things happen to the circus and its members when we come to Gotham’ without him ever consciously feeling a need to further explore that idea or awareness around Gotham....because on a gut level, it felt like he’d already gotten confirmation about something that he and the rest of his circus had always known as a kind of truism, even if they didn’t know why, y’know?

The only real sticking point in all this (well actually there’s two) is first of all, Haly and his family. We know they had some awareness of all this, and there was the Book of Names, and like, Haly and his grandfather knew about the Court in actuality rather than just theory, but its very doubtful that there was anything sinister to this knowledge on Haly’s side of things at least, and it seems pretty clear he was just a pawn operating under duress. That’s my take anyway, like, and it doesn’t make it OKAY for him not to have said or done more, but it makes it a tragedy rather than a betrayal, kinda? Like, he was stuck between a rock and a hard place, and though there’s things he could have said or done to defy the Court and their using the circus to draw their Talons from, he was probably painfully aware that any expression of defiance was going to simply get him and his loved ones killed as an object lesson to whomever they replaced him with, without much more than a slight hiccup in their plans.

And this is where being aware of the transformative power of fanfic and using it with INTENT rather than just going with the most utilized fanon tropes, like, is your best friend. Because thanks to all the gaps and superficiality in how a lot of this was touched on and dealt with in canon....you can make whatever you want out of it, all the more definitively if you know precisely what you want TO make out of it.

For instance: do you want to preserve Dick’s memories of Haly as a kind, grandfatherly figure in his life, someone who would never have stood idly by and allowed the Court’s intended fate for him to happen? You can do that....by playing up the idea that Haly saw an opportunity come out of the tragedy of the Graysons’ death, to separate Dick from the circus, and thus the Court, like lean into the idea that he was all for notable public figure Bruce Wayne taking in Dick and thus keeping him in a new, bigger kind of spotlight the shadowy Court wouldn’t dare try and steal him from. Unless of course, he suspected that billionaire and old money Gothammite Bruce Wayne WAS a member of the Court, and that’s why he wanted to take Dick in, in the first place. Crap. Just thought of that, that’s an obstacle.

UNLESS unless! You have Haly trying all the more to get Dick to stay with them, at least until they’re out of Gotham again and he can end up in the CPS system of some other NON Gotham city, once Bruce does express an interest in taking in Dick, BECAUSE he thinks Bruce is a member of the Court, and so he’s so clearly afraid of Bruce for some reason that Bruce simply can’t reconcile with his own public image and can’t simply be simple fear of the upper class when Haly’s Circus is used to catering to such crowds and Haly’s always displayed an ability to navigate the currents of such shark-infested waters as the Circus’s ringmaster....no, this has to be something other than just public perceptions, Haly’s fear of Bruce and his intentions for Dick feels PERSONAL.

Which perhaps makes Bruce come to Haly then as Batman, reassure him from that angle....which could in turn make Haly open up to him then and there about the Court and their obsession with the Gray Son, when he’s aware then that public figure Bruce Wayne isn’t a member of the Court and CAN offer the somewhat dubious (and double-edged) protection of that spotlight, AND at the same time, that he’s not some dumbass, but the Batman, with superhero connections and resources all his own that he can use to hunt the Court from the shadows and protect Dick that way too.

Thus giving Bruce forewarning about the threat of the Court (and hopefully Dick too, as I don’t think with this kind of storyline, keeping him in the dark his ENTIRE childhood would be fair or a good idea, even if it is understandable, like, there’s different ways to play this, but that seems doomed to backfire if that’s the road taken there).

Another thought about Robin and his bright colors and impossible-to-deny presence here though, actually.....what if part of why Bruce allowed Dick to be Robin at all was because it enabled him to kinda....extend the public spotlight Dick was in, as a barrier against the Court taking him....to more than just their civilian personas? Like, if Bruce KNOWS that Dick never had even the possibility of a normal life because even without him coming into his life, the Court was always going to be there, waiting for an opportunity to claim him.....then training him as Robin, giving him field experience as Robin, suddenly takes on a WHOLE different perspective as its Bruce actively giving him the tools to protect himself from an extremely SPECIFIC threat and fate....one that could strike at any time, one that wasn’t guaranteed to wait until Dick was an adult to try and take him so Bruce felt he couldn’t afford to wait until he was older to try and prepare him to be able to fight back, if they ever did come for him. Plus, as Robin, he was a BRIGHT figure in ways that are completely contrary to Bruce’s early start as an urban legend himself, something that could just as easily not exist as exist as rumored. From the moment Robin was a confirmed quantity, however, people were going to notice when and if he disappeared.....thus making it all the more impossible for the Court to quietly disappear Dick Grayson or Robin, without the rest of the hero community noticing too.

Of course, then you have to reconcile this with Bruce firing Dick as Robin....but there’s ways to do that too. *Shrugs* Just musing as I go here, tbh.

Or you can take the road I’ve dabbled with few times, the idea that a big part of why Dick ended up in juvie in that origin, could fanfic-wise be explained by connecting that backstory to the New 52 presence of the Court, and mashing them together so that the Court actually pulled strings after the Graysons’ death to get their Gray Son placed there until ‘they were ready for him’ and in the process wean him away from the morals his parents instilled in him and hone his willingness to fight and even potentially kill, by placing him in a pressure-cooker of an environment aimed at making him into a weapon. But the point here, is this is another more concrete way that Bruce could have even unknowingly thrown a wrench into their plans, by encountering him when he escaped from juvie (something the Court might not have been expecting, having underestimated him) and this leading to him taking Dick in himself, no longer trusting the city or the system to do the job they’d promised to do when they claimed to be taking Dick away from the circus for his own good.

Here, even without knowing about the Court or its plans, you can lean into the idea that Bruce steered Dick away from their intentions for him simply by being a source and a reminder of kindness and kind people. Kinda play up the theme that rather than grow up to be their greatest asset, Dick grew up to be their greatest enemy instead, all due to the introduction of the one variable the Court hadn’t accounted for when trying to forge their ideal weapon....the kindness of a stranger.

My point with both these directions is.....even with the Court having a hand in Haly’s Circus and thus Dick’s childhood, that doesn’t HAVE to make Dick’s childhood, or his destiny, inherently a tragedy, because despite all the Talon fics out there, the fact remains that in canon, in the main timeline....Dick’s never actually ever been a Talon....he exists, much like he’s always aimed to exist....as a defiance of expectations, of determinism, of a fated destiny. And thus he embodies something he’s embraced over and over again, the idea that only he truly gets to decide who and what he is.....and by utilizing one of the above ideas in his backstory, you can put Haly or Bruce or both firmly on HIS side, and give them active roles in giving him the tools he needs to subvert the Court’s destiny for himself, and choose his own path.

So, ultimately IMO, the Court’s connection to Dick’s past really is just one more way in which his story can be what its always been....that of retaining his core self even in the face of tragedies, making a triumph out of resisting the world (or specific people in it)’s attempts to make him other than a hero.

(The other sticking point I mentioned, aside from Haly, is one I’ve never really been able to reconcile myself, because it relies so much on the ages DC tried to force down our throat with the New 52, and to which I say NAY, NAY DC, DICK GRAYSON WAS NOT SIXTEEN WHEN HE MET BRUCE WAYNE, THIS IS NOT A JOEL SCHUMACHER PRODUCTION AND YOU DON’T HAVE THAT WACKY AND INEXPLICABLE CHARM.

And that’s the presence of other acrobats who aren’t part of the Flying Grayson family act, like Raya and Raymond, who we ultimately see as being very aware of the Court of Owls by the time Dick becomes aware of them. And like. There’s a lot going on there, and I don’t entirely know how to make it work but largely because I’ve never been all that inclined or inspired to try, so I mostly just let that be, and lift elements of the Court of Owls and transplant them into and over pre-Flashpoint continuity, which I prefer overall anyway).

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lucas-koh · 4 years ago

Text

Stitches - Bryce Lahela x MC XII

Parts 1-11 linked in bio!

Somewhat canon compliant.

Rating: M, mentions of medical misdemeanour, implied sex, language

Song: Do I Wanna Know (Live At The BBC) - Hozier

Word Count: 3367

Taglist: @lahellacute @lahamseiroshoe @anotherbeingsworld @fuseboxmusebox @choicesficwriterscreations @bubblelaureno @bratzlahela @eleanorbloom @bryceslahela @thegreentwin @kelseaaa || please let me know if you would like to be added to or removed from this list

Chapter Twelve: An Inconvenient Truth

So. Denial hadn’t been working. At this point Suki had to admit to herself her crush on Bryce. She had no clue what to do. She should end it, right? It wouldn’t be fair on him. He hadn’t signed up for this and they’d made it pretty clear they didn’t want this to happen.

Suki hadn’t had feelings for anyone in such a long time that it had never seemed possible to her. She’d never dreamed she’d end up feeling some type of way for Bryce Lahela. The moment she felt that déjà vu she should’ve run for the hills. Maybe in hindsight the whole thing was a mistake, but it was too late now.

She was laying there in his bed, on his chest, wearing his pyjamas. She definitely wasn’t doing herself any favours right at that moment.

She wanted to stay there forever, enveloped in his smell and his warm skin and the light breeze of his breaths on her forehead; the soft cotton of his pyjamas, the dizzying sensation of his arm on her waist.

But god, Bryce really hadn’t bargained for this. She had to get out of there before she drove herself crazy or overstayed her welcome. Or worse, drove him away. Because although it might not have been what was best for her after the revelation, all Suki wanted was to keep Bryce in her life.

“Thank you so much. Again. But I oughta get out of your hair.” She started to lift herself off him, dreaming up reluctance as his arm fell away from her.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want. You said you had today off too, right? You must be feeling pretty rough,” he chuckled.

“Thank you for offering but really. I should go home.” Should more than you know. Should for my own sanity. Should because it’s the right thing to do when it was me who fucked up.

Bryce left her to it as she changed out of his pyjamas – slowly, she was hungover as hell – and back into the clothes that were strewn across Bryce’s kitchen.

“I’ll wash your underwear for you,” he offered, as they had been caught in the crossfire of her vomit. She could tell it was a serious offer despite the smug smirk painted on his face.

Stop it! Stop it stop it stop it! “No, you won’t. I have a washing machine at home.”

She collected them from him in a plastic bag, how embarrassing.

Imagine making such a state of yourself? I’m twenty-fucking-eight years old and I drank too much because I was afraid to admit I might have some stupid schoolgirl crush on my fuck buddy? Have you ever seen anything more tragic? And now he’s fucking handing me my sick-soaked underwear in a plastic fucking bag. Like a fucking child. A child who threw up at school and had to go home early and get picked up by their mom. And now I can’t stop fucking cursing myself for putting myself in this position. If there was ever any moment at all that he maybe saw me as more than a fuck, that moment was lost now.

So Suki left, her head spinning and not just because of an asshole of a hangover.

Maybe it was just a temporary baseless infatuation. Maybe Suki shouldn’t have been jumping to such drastic measures…

So that - Suki’s denial and clinging on to the hope that she could find a way to continue this – was how Suki and Bryce ended up continuing to sleep together throughout the month of February. But the longer it went on, the more sure Suki was that this addicting feeling when she thought of him was sticking around. And it wasn’t fair on him.

She kept thinking about it, considering her options, making the excuse that she didn’t want to jump into the wrong decision. So yeah, she kept sleeping with him. And no, there was no way in hell Suki was admitting to Bryce that she was into him.

She’d been afraid to contact him after everything that had happened, the amount of embarrassment she’d caused for herself, but he was the one to reach out first. It surprised Suki that he even wanted anything to do with her after all that.

“How’s your hand?” He’d asked the first time since the incident, picking up her wrist and investigating the healing.

“It’s okay, it doesn’t hurt much any more.” The wound was scarring to scab and itch.

“It’s looking good.”

“I guess I have your skills to thank.”

“How many times have I told you?” He grinned, “I’m a talented guy.”

They’d become comfortable with one another, really comfortable, and the friend part of friend with benefits could no longer be ignored.

Suki’s problem? Bryce was impossible to get a read on. She had absolutely no idea to tell if her newfound feelings were reciprocated, because he was a huge flirt to everyone. And Suki wasn’t one to take risks. So she didn’t say anything, assumed Bryce felt the same as he ever had for her.

She was right, of course, but not in the way she expected.

A few nights into the month Bryce texted:

Scalpel Jockey: *sigh* i should call her😉

Bryce’s text was accompanied by a selfie taken in front of his toilet, wide grin and thumb up. So embarrassing. He’d been right about the blackmail thing, then. He wasn’t going to let the mess I was go.

Santa Fe: you’re not even using the meme right

Scalpel Jockey: well my toilet misses your mouth so be sure to come visit it tomorrow

Santa Fe: you think you’re going to get laid after reminding me of the most embarrassing night of my life?

Over-exaggeration. But it honestly sort of felt that way.

Scalpel Jockey: of course I will😏

Santa Fe: nope

Scalpel Jockey:👀😌🤨

The next day,

Santa Fe: fine. see u soon.

—-

“Owwww somethings digging into my back!” Bryce yelped as he’d rolled away from Suki. He did some odd contortions to reach underneath himself and grab whatever was causing the grievance. “Suki, why the hell is your id badge in my bed?”

“Uh, maybe because you chucked it into the abyss a minute ago.”

He gave her a look with pursed lips. He rolled to his side facing away from Suki.

“Aww, you look so cute in this. All innocent and shit.”

“Give it back.”

“I mean it! Look at that little face,” he cooed, brushing the image with his thumb.

“It’s really not my best picture at all,” she groaned. What was it about ID card images which made them always turn out terrible? And then one is left with said image for potentially years to come.

“Suki, this says your birthday is January 18th? You didn’t say anything?” He turned to face her.

“January was so busy, I wasn’t that fussed.”

“You should’ve said. I would’ve celebrated with you.”

“Birthday sex?” She laughed.

“No, like proper birthday stuff. Whatever you like doing on them. And then maybe some birthday sex,” he added with a smirk.

“Eh. It was fine, I just got takeout.”

Bryce tutted.

“When’s your birthday, then?”

Suddenly he looked bashful and uneasy. “Um. November 27th.”

“Oh my god. You’re an idiot.”

“Nah. I’m a Sagittarius,” he winked.

“I can’t believe you were trying to make me feel guilty for not mentioning my birthday when you didn’t either.”

“We actually spent it together. That day I looked after Tommy. I had a great time.”

“Oh.” He had to stop saying things like that. It was terrible for her heart. “I can’t believe you let me set a random kid on you for your birthday.”

“I said I had a great time didn’t I?”

And god Suki’s stomach was having a party, an anxiety-ridden, nerves-on-fire, doubt-clad, smitten-as-shit party.

—-

In no time at all It was Valentine’s Day. Not that Suki was paying any attention… or that she wanted to spend it with a certain god-like surgeon. She didn’t even need to mention it, the plan was just act like this was any other hookup. February 14th was just a day – the way we ascribe time only exists because of us; and therefore it’s just a normal hookup. Using existentialism to cure crush nerves? Surprisingly works.

Santa Fe: 👃

Scalpel Jockey: sorry sukes i’m sick🤒

Well. That was not what she was expecting.

But wait. What if he was faking? What if he knew it was Valentine’s Day and was worried Suki was trying to make a gesture and had to let her down easy?

Worse, what if he was spending Valentine’s with someone else? After all, they had agreed not to be exclusive. Shit. What if Bryce liked someone else?? She didn’t even think about it before and now she felt a bit sick. He was an insanely attractive guy – chances were even without time to meet people there would be plenty at the hospital falling at his feet. There was no way he hadn’t been asked out for Valentine’s.

Those worries were quelled by another text, a picture of Bryce’s legs in his bed and the TV at the end playing something. There was a small bag full of used tissues.

Bless him, he really is sick.

Suki knew what she had to do.

Clanging about in the kitchen she muscled up some veg-packed soup, a vegetable lasagne, and a vegetable stir-fry. She also blended a fruit smoothie. Then she packed everything into Tupperware and fit a couple of portions of each into an insulated container.

Suki marched over to Bryce’s with the insulated container full of her cooked meals and determination. God, I’m a simp.

When she arrived she knocked hard so that he could hear. It was a couple of minutes before Suki heard footsteps, then they stopped (presumably for Bryce to look through the fish-eye) before Bryce creaked the door open.

“Suki. Didn’t you get my text, I’m sick I can’t-“ his voice was weak and croaky, slightly nasal – and he definitely sounded ill.

“I know. I’m not here for that. I bought you these,” she held up the insulated bag.

“What is it?”

“Food. Meals. Because you’re sick and you can’t cook. It’s just simple immune-boosting stuff,” she held out the bag for him to take.

He sniffed loudly and opened the door wider. “Come in.”

She was going to protest, but for some reason she didn’t. The plan was just to drop the food off, not to come in. But when faced with the opportunity Suki’s legs carried her subconsciously. When Bryce opened the door up for her she could see him closer. Dark bags under his eyes, greasy hair, chapped lips. He was wearing sweatpants (similar to the pair Suki had tucked away in her drawer at home from Christmas), and a cotton t shirt. He looked rough. Somehow, he was still the most beautiful man she’d ever met. And seeing him like this wasn’t off-putting at all, it just made her want to look after him. Be there for him. Why am I willing to do so much for him? Liking people is a bit like giving away your soul, isn’t it?

“You get back into bed and I’ll heat one of these up for you. They should still be mostly warm, anyway.”

“Sukes, I’ll be fine,” he said nasally. The nickname sent Suki’s organs into overdrive. Because here he was at his lowest, referring to Suki with an affectionate moniker and sounding like a melancholic song.

“I kind of owe you, remember?”

Bryce hummed a nod, too tired for much else, and slunk back into his bedroom.

Suki busied herself checking all the Tupperware’s – they were cool enough to go in the freezer by then so she put all bar one away. She heated that one for a few moments and transferred it into a bowl with cutlery, planted that on a tray, and brought it through to Bryce.

He was in bed as Suki had instructed, old reruns of Criminal Minds playing on his TV. He smiled weakly when he saw her enter with the tray of soup.

“Thank you,” he said as she placed the tray on his lap.

“No problem.”

He took a spoon of soup and gulped it down gently. Then he turned to Suki, who was now perched lightly on the edge of his bed facing him.

“I’m not good with… seeming weak,” he said, looking at Suki intensely.

“You don’t need to worry about that. It’s only me. I vomited in your toilet.”

“Exactly,” he muttered, and when Suki was about ask what he meant he carried on, “this soup is amazing.”

They sat in silence with only the sounds of the TV as Bryce worked his way through the bowl of soup. Suki was too nervous to ask what he’d meant.

“Thank you,” he said as he finished the bowl. She took the tray from him and took it back through to the kitchen, washing everything up for him. She returned to Bryce’s room, noting beads of sweat on his forehead. Going into Bryce’s en-suite, Suki found a washcloth and soaked it with some cold water before giving it a squeeze.

When she returned to Bryce’s side she gently dabbed the washcloth over his hot forehead. He looked up at her, vulnerable, exhausted – very un-Bryce. She was ever so gentle as she dabbed the cool cloth over his skin. Then Bryce reached up and held onto her wrist weakly with his hand.

“Why are you doing all this?”

“Like I said, I owe you. I was hard work that night at yours.”

He seemed to accept this answer, and gulped a little as he let go of her wrist. She pulled the cloth from his forehead for a moment.

“I’m still nervous,” he croaked.

“About?”

“You seeing me like this. It’s not exactly sexy.”

Suki’s nosiness was getting the better of her, and she knew now would be a good time to strike since there’d been an opening.

“The whole… weakness thing – that’s why you were weird about the surgery?”

“Yeah. Yeah it is,” he sighed, looking at Suki as though weighing up his options. He seemed to come to a decision and continued: “I already went through struggles with self doubt. My parents fucked up my whole belief in myself - it’s why I overcompensate now. It’s why I took the surgery thing so hard, I felt myself doubting my abilities. Well it was more like – less that I was actually doubting myself, because I know I’m good, and more that I was worried I would start doubting myself.”

“Yeah, that totally makes sense.” Suki was surprised he was opening up to her like this. She noticed how he mentioned his parents, but she’d let him get there when he was was ready.

“I’m sorry for not telling you at the time.”

“It’s okay, I wasn’t owed the story. So what really happened? You got kicked off because of karaoke?”

“Uh, the other surgical interns kind of have it out for me.”

“What?”

“Well… everyone liked me at first. You know, I’m a likeable guy,” he flashed a grin, a ghost of his normal megawatt smile, “but I think once they saw how competent and determined I was that changed fast.”

“Jealousy,” she scoffed, “So that’s why you don’t hang out with them any more?” Suki remembered how he’d avoided them at Halloween.

“Yeah. And there was a group of them spreading shit from the start about me, dangerous rumours that could get me fired. Saying I drink on the job, I have *ahem* sexual relationships with my patients, that I’m a terrible surgeon and only made it here because of my parents money which is...”

“Your parents are well off?”

Bryce’s jaw tightened. “Yeah, uh, people found out about who my parents are too.”

“Who are they?”

“Another time,” he bit his lip as though unsure, concern as he looked into Suki’s face.

“Okay- drinking at work, sex with patients? Where the hell did those come from?”

“Well I keep a few condoms in my locker, for you, that can’t have looked great after the accusations. I don’t know shit about the drinking. I guess it just sounded bad and anyone who has had out it for me just wants me to look incompetent.”

“Those fucking dicks.”

Bryce shrugged. “It shows I’m a major threat,” he gave her a smug grin but his heart wasn’t quite in it. “So all that stuff got relayed back to Dr Emery and the karaoke the night before was apparently the last straw. She didn’t want to take the risk in case it was true and gave my surgery to Ben.”

“Ben, huh?” She asked, a sudden iciness in her tone. Like, Ben ‘you like her?’ Ben? Digging into Bryce’s private life Ben?

“Yeah, he’s another intern - you probably don’t know him.”

Maybe not. But I’m about to.

“I know some Ben’s… what’s his last name?”

“White.”

“Oh no, I don’t know him,” Suki smiled sweetly, dabbing Bryce’s head with the flannel again. She’d gotten the information she needed.

Bryce chuckled weakly. “I told you.”

“Sorry.”

“Yeah so, obviously Dr Emery investigated it all after that and realised that none of it was true. But by then I’d lost it anyway. The damage was done, you know? Sorry, I know I sound a bit ‘woe is me’.”

“Not at all. You can talk to me, seriously. Friends – remember? I’m so sorry you had to go through that.” And angrier than I’m letting on.

“I suppose I owe you an apology too. For shutting you down and running away when you tried to ask me about it. I’m just- it’s- I like being That Guy, you know? The one who’s got his shit together. The one who’s the expert surgeon. Who doesn’t let things phase him. Laughs everything off. The one who’s amazing in bed,” he looked at her with a look that was, if Suki didn’t know any better, nervous. God, it’s so weird seeing him like this. But my heart is completely breaking for him.

“If I’m-“ he continued, then seemed to change his mind, “what you need from me wasn’t that, so I didn’t want to mess things up.”

“By being human? You could never,” she smiled as she bought the flannel back to his face, but it was more an excuse to stroke her finger over his cheek comfortingly. Bryce’s eyes seemed to shut involuntarily and he moved into her touch, just letting it be for a while. He was still hot, but had a bit more colour to his face, so Suki felt she had helped at least a little.

Fuck. I like you so much.

This definitely wasn’t helping her whole predicament, because each word he’d said to her, each touch, each look on his face – and she was a puddle on the floor. Overwhelmed with the ache she felt in her chest at the whole situation. That something as ridiculous as jealousy – between people who’s job it was to help others for gods sake – had put Bryce in such a spin. And it seemed to her that losing the surgery was bad for him, but the way that affected his confidence and how he felt he had to be around her – that seemed to have affected him more.

He was too proud.

And she cared for him too much to be okay with seeing him like this.

Suki must’ve been cradling Bryce’s face longer than she’d realised, because he eventually started snoring quietly. His eyebrows now flattened on his face and looking more at peace than he had since she’d arrived. She was careful when removing her hand and placing a pillow up under his head. She placed a gentle kiss to his forehead, brushing against the cool damp area she’d been dabbing. Then she snuck into his bathroom to fill up a glass of water and collect some aspirin, leaving them on his bedside table for him before escaping his apartment.

Suki was on a mission, fuelled by affection and anger.

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purplesurveys · 3 years ago

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1278

Social Media Survey

[joybucket]

What is your favorite social media site? Either Twitter or YouTube, though I never use YouTube as a social media site per se so I guess this round goes to Twitter.

Do you use...

facebook? myspace? twitter? snapchat? instagram? youtube? pinterest? bzoink? another site with message boards? tumblr? deviantart? xanga?

Facebook

Do you get on Facebook every day? Yeah pretty much all throughout the day. I used to never use it, like never ever; but back in college all announcements were coursed through Facebook so I was technically required to be on it regularly, and it was from there that I began to see memes and start to be more active. I’m a shitposter more than anything though and I rarely ever post stuff of my own. How many FB friends do you have? I have 679 at the moment but I want to get rid of like 500 of them; it’s just such a long list to go through so I never get to proceed with my unfriending spree lol.

Have you ever been on a deleting spree? HAHA I just mentioned that. I’ve always wanted to, but like I said 679 is already such an exhaustive list for me, and that’s considering I only started touching my Facebook in like 2019. I can’t imagine people who started Facebook in like 2009 and have 4000 friends aka most people I know.

Have you blocked a lot of haters? I don’t have haters; at least I’m not aware of any that I have. Not that it’s something I care about at this point.

Do you get bullied online a lot? No, but that’s also because I don’t really open the channels for people to send in hate. I don’t have Q&A handles like Curious Cat and I never pick out that option in Instagram where people can send in questions.

What's your favorite Facebook app? Oh I never use Facebook for their apps. Are those still even a thing...? Anyway, I mainly go there to be on the hunt for stupid memes I can reshare or to watch videos that are either funny or informative.

Are you a fan of selfies? I don’t mind if other people do it, but I think I’m honestly bad at selfies so I almost never take them. I’ve never figured out my angles or what filters look ok on me.

Has anyone ever called the police on you because they didn't like your status? No but I have had my posts reported because they were deemed ‘offensive.’ Which is weird because my posts that have been taken down are those that speak out against disgusting men, which says a lot about Facebook runs their shit more than anything else.

Are you in any facebook groups? I’m in nearly a hundred groups, both private i.e. for school purposes, and public.

Are you the admin of any groups? Nah. Too much time and effort needed out of me.

Do you report abuse to group admins whenever you see it? Yes. I report the post then leave the group.

What could make Facebook better? They could put more effort into detecting and banning troll farms.

What year did you start using Facebook? I made an account in 2012 because of a high school class that required us to upload this specific video-format homework onto Facebook (which in hindsight is such an insensitive homework considering that was nearly a decade ago when the Philippines was still severely behind in internet connection speeds?? Ugh). But I didn’t start actively using my account until around two years ago.

What is your current profile picture of? Myself, posing in front of the sunflowers in school during the recent graduation season.

Did you like the old Myspace better than Facebook? I was never a regular user of Myspace, so...

What are some of your favorite boards? I’ve never had a clue what the purpose of Pinterest was. I mean I have an account...but I’ve also never gotten the hang of it?? so I never touch it hahaha.

Have you ever done a craft you saw on Pinterest? Well no, because I’m terrible at arts and crafts anyway.

Do you have a Dream Wedding board? If so, what's on it? No.

If you have a Dream House board, what does your dream house look like? Ok fine this one I did start hahahah but I don’t even remember what I added on there anymore. I’m sure it was filled with modern-style houses with minimalist interior design.

Do you wish they'd bring the "like" button back? I’m not even aware of this option.

Do you have a Bucket List board? Not aware of this either.

Which do you like better: Just Girly Things or And That's Who I Am? The second one sounds less childish. < Same, and it sounds like it covers more.

Do you have a board for tattoos you like? If so, what are some of your faves? No. The only one I ever made was the house one, then Pinterest quickly became boring from there when I realized there wasn’t much else I could do besides making mood boards.

Do you have a "Random" or "Miscellaneous" board? No.

Have you ever reached the maximum number of boards? No.

Do you have any secret boards? No.

Have you ever had a Pin deleted because of copyright laws? No.

Do you have a Color board? No.

Do you have an About Me board? If so, what's on it? No.

YouTube

Do you have a YouTube channel? If so, what is it? Technically I do but I only have it so I can tailor video suggestions to my interests and so that I can like videos and subscribe to channels I like.

What kind of things do you post on YouTube? I’ve never posted any video on there, not even private ones. I’m also not the type to comment.

What do you like to watch on YouTube? These days YouTube serves as a stress reliever for me, which is to say I would typically go for humorous BTS-related compilations because there are sooooo many hilarious channels that make these great videos haha. Occasionally I’d go back to channels or series that I used to frequent, like Good Mythical Morning, Buzzfeed’s Worth It and Unsolved, Try Guys, Watcher, etc.

Are you subscribed to any channels? To so many.

Do you watch any vlogs? If so, what ones are your favorite? Hm probably Jiwoo’s, though her channel is called Mejiwoo. I find her content calming and conversational and basically fun to binge-watch when I’m not looking for anything super super particular to watch.

If you have a channel, how many subscribers do you have? 0. I’m just a lurker.

Will you subscribe to my channel? (msg me if you want a link!) Only if it’s really fit to my interests, I guess.

Do you watch music videos? Rarely; not a fan of MVs in particular. I only really ever put an exception for BTS.

Have you ever watched a TV show on youtube? Well no since their copyright team works hard and works fast lol. I do watch entire video game walkthroughs from time to time.

Have you ever worked out to exercise videos on youtube? No, I can’t care less about working out tbh.

Have you watched Amanda Todd's famous video? No. I’m scared that it might be too upsetting or triggering for me.

Have you ever looked up how to do something on YouTube? Not really, I prefer looking up articles that can teach me step by step in words.

Do you get a lot of hate comments on youtube? No, I’ve never posted anything on there.

How long have you been a youtuber? Never been.

Instagram

Do you post on Instagram a lot? I do 1-3 Instagram stories in a week, I would say. As for posts, I only have 4 in total and I don’t really feel the pressure to add more. I just post when I feel the want to.

Have you ever posted a poll on instagram? Nah, I’m not too sure if anyone would participate so I’ve never tried. If you don't have an iPhone, do you wish you could use Instagram? I’m pretty sure other operating systems can also use Instagram...

Do you have any followers? Around 50, I think.

Do you like Instagram filters? I’ll use them sometimes to make my stories appear prettier.

Twitter

Do you think twitter is stupid? Hehe show me at least one person who doesn’t think so. < Coming from someone who regularly uses Twitter, agree. It is crazy stupid but stupid is what I’m there for. Which is honestly not always such a bad thing to me - I like that people are more themselves, more stripped-down, vulnerable on Twitter. People always seem to want to show off their best selves on Facebook and Instagram, so I’m actually kind of grateful that there is at least one social media out there where people can just be their clumsy, goofy selves.

How often do you tweet? Probably a maximum of five a day. Nowadays I’m on there mostly to just scroll through my timelines.

Do you get on twitter every day? Yes, both on my personal and fan account.

Bzoink

Do you make a lot of surveys? I never make them but I try to take them as often as I can.

Do you take a lot of surveys? Haha sorry, was one step ahead of you. Yeah, I do.

Do you post in the message boards? Nah. I dunno if I’m even permitted to check the message boards on Bzoink considering I don’t have an account.

What types of surveys are your favorite? Categorized surveys like this one or countdown ones can be fun, but at the end of the day I like sticking to the classic random survey.

Do you have friends on here? Not on Bzoink, but here on Tumblr yes! There’s a number of people here I like keeping up with :)

Do you post all your secrets on here? Again, not on Bzoink; but yep I share pretty much everything here.

What type of survey do you think I should make next? Anything but basic/about me-themed ones that will ask for my name and eye color and weight.

Do you read peoples' answers to your surveys? I’ve never made a survey.

Do you think you are good at making surveys?

Do you try to make unique surveys?

What type of surveys do you want to see more of?

Random

This or That

Scattergories

Have You Ever

Are you like me?

About You

Personal, Deep Questions

Girly

Music shuffle

Would You Rather

Do you have this in your bedroom?

Long

Short

All About Your Crush

Fashion

Make-up

School

Music

Your health

Your friends

Confessions

Girl Confessions - how different is this from just confessions? Hahaha

R-Rated

Controversial topics

Myspace

Did you have a myspace when you were in high school? I started an account in like 4th grade when Myspace was ~big, but I didn’t find it fun and everyone my age was on Friendster anyway, so I was largely inactive.

Do you use myspace now? No. Is it still even around? I have no clue.

Do you miss bulletins? I didn’t get to join in on the fun so there’s nothing to miss.

Did you like customizing your profile with the old myspace? Not attributed to Myspace but I did have a lot of fun customizing my Multiply and Tumblr accounts back in the day. That was a period where I really got to learn and play around with HTML :)

Did you have music on your profile? Not on Myspace again but I did on Multiply! I had a cute little playlist that played the songs immediately as soon as you landed on my page hahaha.

Did you learn HTML when you used Myspace? Tumblr, yeah. I believe the skills are still there but I’ll definitely be a bit rusty.

Did you have a customized cursor? Oh, no. Wasn’t a fan of those as I found them a bit tacky.

Did you use glitter graphics? Also found those tacky haha no, I never used those.

Do you remember posting glitter graphics on friends' pages? Nope.

Did you make "dolls"? I don’t recall ever making those.

Did you use photo captions? Not sure what this is referring to so let’s just say no.

Did you have a photo slideshow on your profile? Hmmm nope, I don’t think so.

Xanga

Did you have a Xanga account back in the day? No. It wasn’t big here so I had never heard of it until I started taking surveys on here and heard people mentioning Xanga, actually.

Do you have a xanga account now? No.

Did you post photos and quotes on your xanga page? I never had any.

Snapchat

Do you use snapchat? I did; I was superrrrr active on there for a time. It kind of just got old at one point, though, and my feed got more and more dead until I too just left my account dormant altogether.

What is your favorite filter? There were a lot of cute ones on there that helped me be more confident with taking selfies but my favorites have to be the dog and flower crown ones.

Tumblr

Do you understand Tumblr? I had a better handle of it when I ran a fan account that required me to be more active; but now that I really just go on here to take surveys I just use the basic functions and nothing more. But yeah, I understand just enough to get by.

Do you use Tumblr? Yeah. Even on the days I don’t post surveys, I regularly go on here to keep up with friends I like keeping up with like Elisabeth, Lane, Steph, Lina, Julie :)

Other

What forum sites did you use to love that aren't around anymore? There was one message board I frequented for this girly/tween magazine I used to collect, but I won’t share the name.

Are there any other great social media sites that you recommend? I think this survey was able to cover all the main ones I use.

Do you use a photo editing site? If so, what? I use apps instead of sites to edit my photos.

Do you ever use BeFunky.com? Nope.

Do you use a video editing site? If so, what? Nah, I rarely have to edit videos in a super intricate, detailed way. Apple’s video editing features suffice for me.

Have you ever downloaded fonts? Very occasionally since it’s never necessary.

Have you ever used photobucket to upload an image? No but I remember going on there back in the day to look for images. I never uploaded any, though.

Do you use iTunes? Not anymore. I have an account on Spotify now.

Do you listen to music on Pandora? No, never used it.

#surveys #survey

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gerec · 4 years ago

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AU-gust 2020 Prompts

AUs 1-5 on Ao3 6. Hospital AU - Cherik 7. Childhood Friends AU - Cherik 8. Superheroes/Superpowers AU - Starles, past Cherik 9. Royalty AU - Cherik

10. Pirates AU

The past fifteen years have taught Erik more than a few life lessons, useful tips and tricks he garnered on the open sea, slowing rising through the ranks from lowly deckhand to Captain of the dreaded pirate vessel Genosha. His sharp instincts have saved him more times than he can count – in skirmishes against the Crown, as well as other pirates and lowlife scum – and helped cement his fortune while building a reputation as a man both ruthless and unafraid. And he’s never once been proven wrong with his keen judge of character, not with those he calls friends (a few) or those he calls enemies (the many). Even now, he can’t truly fathom how he could have been so utterly duped; so thoroughly outwitted and out maneuvered by a boy ten years his junior…  Erik is certain his old crew would laugh themselves sick, if they knew the predicament he’s currently in, entirely of his own making. In hindsight, the clues about young Lord Xavier have always been there, clear as an ‘X’ on a treasure map if Erik had but taken a closer look, and not let that pretty face distract him, or let his libido do his thinking.  With a King’s pardon and a trunk full of pirate gold, Erik had moved to bustling London six months ago, ready to enjoy the fruits of his labor. As it was not in his nature to sit idle in his new townhome, Erik sought a good marriage prospect from the various noble houses – someone with an impeccable reputation and the right last name. He found it in young Charles Francis Xavier, son of the late Lord Brian Xavier, and a distant relative to the King.

Charles was everything that Erik could have asked for; pretty, frivolous but mannered and charming, and able to open doors to polite society that would otherwise have remained firmly shut. And he was eager to accept Erik’s offer of marriage, keen to get away from an insufferable family it seemed, and quite happy to stay out of his new husband’s affairs.

His first clue should have been the most obvious, as the Charles he met at Graymalkin – quiet, meek and firmly under his stepfather’s control – was a mere shadow of the man he actually married; intelligent, witty and full of life. He had numerous friends that visited frequently, an eclectic mix of scholars and tradesmen, nobles and soldiers, and spent many hours in the salon debating the merits of science and trading gossip for sport.

He knew everyone, and everyone knew Charles, and Erik - through his young husband – found himself duly welcomed into many wealthy and important homes.

His second clue was rather closely tied to the first, for he discovered on their wedding night, that the shy, inexperienced young Lord he expected was in fact, a carefully constructed façade. As soon as Erik led him in their bedroom and closed the door, Charles had promptly dropped to his knees and untied his breeches, and swallowed his entire length down his throat with an impish grin. And he spent the rest of their wedding night in much the same way, proving - very skillfully - that he wasn’t a virgin, and could very well do the despoiling.

The third clue, Erik concedes, is a little more obscure, and only made obvious after suffering through Constable Summers’ interrogation. A rash of burglaries throughout London’s most prominent homes, and various expensive heirlooms purloined, all within a day or two after a visit from Mr. Lehnsherr and Lord Xavier. It must be the work of a notorious pirate, the man had accused, for who else had means, motive and ability to commit such daring and outrageous thievery?

Charles, apparently greatly offended on his behalf, railed passionately at the Constable for the accusations, insisting that Erik was innocent of such crimes, for he could vouch for his husband’s whereabouts during the times the acts had been committed. And because Charles was beloved and his reputation beyond reproach, Summers could only leave empty handed, with no leads and no better knowledge of who exactly was the culprit in question…

Erik himself would have no idea, if he hadn’t accidentally stumbled on the object of the latest and most valuable theft yet, stuffed in his husband’s desk drawer; a gem from the African continent, taken from General Stryker’s manor not two evenings before.

He finds that he’s rather angry with Charles, for using Erik’s own reputation as a decoy, to deflect attention from himself onto a more obvious suspect…

And he finds that he’s rather angry with himself, for being suitably impressed by the boy’s daring and his fearlessness, and for falling even more hopelessly in love.

#gerec writes #cherik #pirates au #au-gust 2020 #august writing challenge #day 10

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odanurr87 · 4 years ago

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My thoughts on... The King: Eternal Monarch

Lee Min-ho as Lee Gon, and Kim Go-eun as Jeong Tae-eul.

Release date: April 17 - June 12, 2020

Episodes: 16

Available on: Netflix

Plot synopsis: On one fateful night of December 1994, the king of the Kingdom of Corea was brutally murdered by his illegitimate brother, Lee Lim. The king’s son, Lee Gon, was spared a similar fate thanks to the timely intervention of a mysterious saviour, who only left behind an identity card belonging to one Lieutenant Jeong Tae-eul. 15 years later, King Lee Gon finds himself transported to the parallel world of the Republic of Korea where he meets Lieutenant Jeong Tae-eul and together they work to uncover a conspiracy across their two worlds.

Rewatch meter: Medium to High

Introduction

The King: Eternal Monarch is the latest work by writer Kim Eun-sook and, since I enjoyed two of her previous works (Descendants of the Sun and Goblin), I was quite looking forward to it. I didn't know actor Lee Min-ho at the time but I recalled Kim Go-eun from Goblin so I was relatively excited to see her in another main role. The pilot episode of the show was great, deftly introducing us to a host of characters and setting up several plot threads in a total runtime of 70 minutes, already incorporating the concepts of time travel and parallel worlds, not an easy task and a much welcome departure from most kdramas on air. Since I am a fan of sci-fi and modern fantasy however, that meant I'd put this show under the microscope so how did it fare?

Related reviews: Goblin

Characters

From left to right: Lee Jung-jin as Lee Lim, Jung Eun-chae as Goo Seo-rung, Lee Min-ho as Lee Gon, Kim Go-eun as Jeong Tae-eul, Woo Do-hwan as Jo Yeong, and Kim Kyung-nam as Kang Shin-jae.

The show enjoys, and suffers from, a host of characters on both worlds, with many actors playing dual roles because of the concept of parallel worlds. This (over)abundance of characters results in most having to play second fiddle to the two leads. In hindsight, a tighter cast would've worked better. A fair few of the characters (e.g. the detective hiding something from his wife, the pregnant lady, the mother of Lee Gon's doppelganger, god kid, and many more) did not ultimately justify their presence other than to set up (underwhelmingly resolved) mysteries to keep the audience engaged. More important characters, like Prime Minister Koo and Lee Lim, sadly never reached their full potential to my mind, being relegated to play more stereotypical antagonist roles in the end. While I can understand this decision with Lee Lim to an extent, it was a shame Prime Minister Koo’s character wasn’t more nuanced. While Lee Min-ho's characterization of Lee Gon has taken some flak I found him to act more or less in line with how a (fictional) king would, one excited at the prospect of having found the woman he's been searching for for most of his life. Kim Go-eun as Jeong Tae-eul was the one who truly delivered on the emotional end of the spectrum, as we all knew she would. Sadly, the character of Luna was more undercooked, and the show could probably have done without her.

Pacing

The all-out battle at the end of Episode 11, with Lee Gon showing off his skill with the sword, is one of the highlights of the show.

While the pacing of the show ramped up considerably towards the end it actually started rather slowly. Lee Gon discovers the Republic of Korea at the end of the first episode, yes, but it is not until the end of Episode 4 that he returns to his kingdom, with a skeptical Jeong Tae-eul in tow. Then, it is at the end of Episode 9 that Lee Gon and Lee Lim have their first encounter, with an all-out battle with Lee Lim's henchmen at the end of Episode 11, and the reveal of the identity of the savior at the end of Episode 13. I was quite satisfied with the show's pacing up until that point but a little worried about how they would tie everything up with 3 episodes left, worries that proved to be justified, as many plot threads were left unresolved or rushed to conclusion without living up to the expectations built up after several episodes. Considering the last episode of the show solves the main conflict in the first 20 minutes, I don't think this faster pacing was justified.

Execution

It is difficult not to conclude the execution of the plot wasn't nearly as tight as it could've been. The show continuously introduced new questions, new mysteries, and new characters, to keep us guessing, to keep us engaged, sometimes to the detriment of the overall storytelling quality. Who is this new character? How does s/he factor in Lee Lim's plan? Who's sending this stuff to PM Koo? What is the significance of the scars? There is no doubt these questions succeeded in keeping us engaged and I have to give it props for that. However, the execution was dragged down from indulging in superfluous characters and plot threads. Park Moon-sik's nightly escapades from his wife are a perfect example, a plot whose resolution was needlessly postponed till the final episode. Removing such plots could've open up time better served to further develop characters, like PM Koo, or explore Lee Lim's plans more thoroughly, an aspect where I feel the show dropped the ball, as these turned out to be contradictory and contrived, helping out the writer more than Lee Lim himself.

Time Travel

Sadly, the execution of time travel is a direct casualty of continuously trying to surprise the audience with new twists or for the sake of pulling at our heart strings. Up until Episode 13, its depiction of time travel lined up perfectly with the concept of a causal loop (e.g. Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban), but then Episode 14 had characters remember new past events in real-time (think of the movie Frequency, with Jim Caviezel and Dennis Quaid), and Episode 15 resurrected a character who should've been dead, among potentially more problematic issues. Time travel is a fictional concept, but even fiction is guided by certain rules and, sadly, the depiction of time travel in The King: Eternal Monarch does not hold up under further scrutiny, what deflated my engagement somewhat. Here I was, trying to understand how the writer had put together the puzzle only to realize some of the pieces didn't line up or were from different puzzles altogether. This was not entirely unexpected, as few stories have used time travel consistently in the past, but I was mildly disappointed, particularly given the writer’s excellent work and attention to detail in Goblin.

Romance

Another highlight of the show, especially if you understand exactly what is going on in this scene.

While I can believe Lee Gon could’ve developed feelings for Jeong Tae-eul after searching for her for 20+years (fans of The Expanse will recall Miller also developed feelings for Julie while searching for her), the beginning of their romance in Episode 5 felt a bit forced. It also struck me as odd when Jeong Tae-eul was the one to declare her feelings of love for Lee Gon in Episode 7 instead of the other way around. In fact, it isn't until Episode 10 that Lee Gon admits his feelings for her in one of the most emotional scenes of the show. Perhaps if the two had switched around their declarations it would’ve made more sense.

In any case, their romantic relationship was cemented from Episode 10 onwards for me, although they had cute couple moments in earlier episodes, with Episode 6 featuring the most heartfelt conversations and interactions. For my part, watching their relationship continue to unfold was one of the highlights of the show, and it certainly delivered in the following episodes. Lee Gon's unyielding quest across time and space to find Jeong Tae-eul again and again was moving, though more powerful in Episode 14 than 16 to my mind, perhaps because of the music, editing, and added emotional impact of Jeong Tae-eul knowing Lee Gon is on his way. Perhaps if Episode 16 had dedicated more than 5 minutes (count them) of its runtime to show Lee Gon constantly leaving the palace to search for and meet different versions of Jeong Tae-eul throughout the years it would've been a lot more impactful, and potentially heartbreaking. Tying it to his appearance at the end of Episode 10 would've made it perfect.

Music

youtube

I hesitate slightly to say the soundtrack for The King: Eternal Monarch is on the same level as that of Goblin (time will tell), but if it's not, it certainly isn't far behind. Songs like "Gravity," "Orbit," and "Maze," or instrumental tracks like "One Day," "My Love and...," "Into the Fantasy," and "The Fantasia of Another Dimension," are a sample of this album's best. Sadly, not all tracks featured in the show are included in the album, such as the variant of “The King” that plays at the end of Episode 15 when Lee Gon bids farewell to Lady Noh. If you're a soundtrack aficionado like I am, I'd suggest you keep this album in your Spotify library or equivalent.

Conclusions

The King: Eternal Monarch is, by no means, a perfect show. It is technically not as good as writer Kim Eun-sook's previous Goblin, which overall covered the topics previously discussed better than The King did. However, that is not to say The King: Eternal Monarch isn't an overall good show as it is, one that boldly incorporates interesting concepts like time travel and parallel worlds to its narrative with ultimately mixed results. The music is great, production values are top notch, and all of the actors’ performances were on point, though a tighter cast would’ve benefited some of their performances. While the romance between Lee Min-ho’s and Kim Go-eun’s characters may be a hard sell for some, at least initially, it ultimately worked for me.

If you haven't watched the show yet and are reading this review now, then I'm sorry that you've missed out on the experience of watching the show week to week, discussing and dissecting it with other viewers, and rewatching episodes scouring for clues, a process it easily lends itself to as opposed to other kdramas. If you're into sci-fi and modern fantasy, then I'd encourage you to give it a watch, bearing in mind the previously discussed caveats. If you're into romance kdramas, set your expectations accordingly. If you're looking for more recommendations on modern fantasy+romance and have already watched Goblin, then allow me to recommend the excellent Hotel del Luna (which I’m currently in the process of reviewing after watching it, what, four times now?). For my part, I'm looking forward to Kim Eun-sook, Lee Min-ho, and Kim Go-eun's next projects.

#the king eternal monarch #lee min ho #kim go eun #kim eun sook #woo do hwan #kdrama #review #kdramas

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pezfezrez · 4 years ago

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~open starter~

“It's so difficult, isn't it? To see what's going on when you're in the absolute middle of something? It's only with hindsight we can see things for what they are.”

There’d been a chill when he had entered the Great Hall, the kind that creeps up your spine and takes up temporary residency underneath your skin. That hadn’t been the only warning sign, either. During the night, mixed in between sparkling glasses of spiked punch and clumsy dancing, were many signs that something unsavory was well on its way. Magic left clues for their kind, floating in the air around them like fireflies at twilight. The broken chalice, shattering on its own accord before leaving tiny shards of glass splintered in his fingertips. He’d laughed it off. With a simple wave of his wand, the wounds had healed, and that was that. Nothing was going to ruin his night, or so he’d hope. The onyx colored clouds that had painted the ceiling, moving in ways that looked more like a sea during a record breaking storm than their usual almost completely still, ash grey were the third omen. The day had started off mild, only a slight breeze blew throughout the castle’s grounds. He read a book on Aeromancy once, and maybe if he had a little more faith in divination he would’ve found the sudden change in weather odd. If he wasn’t choosing blissful ignorance, he may have noticed quite a few telltale signs of the upcoming catastrophe.

Rez had his fair share of Firewhiskey during his time at hogwarts. In his not-so-humble opinion, it couldn’t even hold a candle to the muggle stuff. Burned more than necessary, and you needed more of the stuff to really feel good and drunk. He’d had easier times getting properly sloshed with Fireball, which was far cheaper too. Either way, he hadn’t bought the stuff that swirled around a large punch bowl, giving the mix a slightly amber hue. It was good enough, and who was he kidding, he wasn’t turning down any sort of free drink. His cup had been both filled to the brim, and completely empty many times throughout the night. Thankfully, - or not, depending how you looked at it - Rez had a high tolerance.

His robes swayed as he walked back towards the refreshments, on a mission to get another drink for him and Freddie but before he could make it all the way, a loud crash rang out through the hall. Suddenly, where laughter and sloppy dancing had been, there was now screaming and witches and wizards trying desperately to flee. It was such a drastic change in the atmosphere, that Rez had no idea what he should do, and merely looked out at the scene displayed before him for a few seconds. Though once he was pulled back into the moment at hand, he started back in the direction he had come from, towards where he had Left Win. There was the light from spells bouncy around throughout the room, ricocheting off chandeliers and stone walls before dying out. One caught his attention, the green light sailed through the air before hitting an empty table. Only one curse was green like that. His thought was forgotten, only briefly, when his body collided with another student. “We have to get out of here!” He screamed, trying to amplify his voice over all the commotion.

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mellowgelo · 5 years ago

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Misconceptions about Walter White and Grey Matter

Everytime I see a post/video about Walter White’s backstory before the events of Breaking Bad, there’s always dozens of comments from people slagging off his former business partners, Gretchen and Elliott Schwartz. As far as I can see, a lot of the criticisms are completely unfounded. After finishing my 2nd rewatch of the series, I feel compelled to talk about and examine some of these criticisms

1: “Gretchen dumped Walt to fuck his best friend!!”

I mean, I don’t even know why I need to refute this one? In the restaurant scene with Walt and Gretchen, (’Peekaboo,’ 2.06) she clearly describes the events of their breakup: they were both staying at her family home one weekend until Gretchen caught him secretly packing his bags. She asked him what he was doing but he refused to explain and then simply left.

In the scene, Gretchen asks 'did I dream all of that?!’ and Walt does not dispute her version of events. Pretty clearly, he was the one who ended their relationship.

2: “Gretchen was cheating on Walt with Elliott!!”

Again, I’m not sure why this has become such a prevalent idea? At no point does Walt accuse Gretchen of cheating on him (and you don’t think that if she had, he wouldn’t have brought it up during their argument?) and although he talks about Gretchen and Elliott bitterly several times in the series, the fact that they became a couple is never mentioned as the cause of his anger. It’s not specified when Gretchen and Elliott first became a couple or when they got married. Potentially, their relationship might have started years after Walt left the company.

So...it’s not impossible? But there’s no facts to support this idea and Walt’s reactions to the couple don’t suggest that any infidelity took place.

3: “Gretchen and Elliot made their billion dollar company by stealing Walt’s ideas and cutting him out of the business!”

Okay, so this is the big one! The main cause of Walter’s grudge against his former colleagues! The first betrayal that set him on the path to eventually becoming Heisenberg!

And...it’s kind of bullshit.

He first accuses Gretchen of ‘cutting him out’ in Season 2, implying that some shady business deal took place which forced Walt out of the company and denied him his fair share of the profits. However, in ’Buyout’ (5.06) Walt seems to contradict this by telling Jesse that he chose to leave Grey Matter for ‘personal reasons’ and sold his share in the company for $5000.

Now, with the benefit of hindsight, this was clearly a bad financial decision! But there’s no evidence of coercion or manipulation being used against Walt in this situation and as seen in point 1, he’d already begun severing ties to the company by breaking up with Gretchen. Much as he came to regret this choice later, it was a choice that he made freely.

But! What about Walter’s grand contributions to Grey Matter Technologies while he was there? He seems very eager to claim responsibility for the company’s success, telling Gretchen that they built their empire on his work. And in the penultimate episode ’Granite State’ (5.15) watching Gretchen and Elliott claim that his sole contribution to Grey Matter was providing the company name makes Walt furious. He clearly wants to be given the credit as the man who’s research turned a small grad school company into a billion dollar organisation.

But....is he really?

Walt’s status as a brilliant chemist cannot be denied. Neither can the fact that before co-founding Grey Matter, he was a contributor to a Nobel Prize winning experiment! However, when he tells Jesse about his time with the company, he only mentions ‘potential’ and a few insignificant pending patents. Walt gives no specific examples of his achievements at Grey Matter, only vague references to ‘my work’ and ‘my research.’ What exactly is he taking credit for?

Moreover, by the time the series begins, it’s been approximately 20 years since Walter left Grey Matter. Is it really possible that a company this successful would still be riding the coattails of a man who hasn’t worked there in two decades?

None of this is to say that Walt didn’t provide crucial research during his time at Grey Matter, only that we have no idea what this work was. This missing information could just be a case of the writers not wanting to bog the show down with scientific jargon etc, but I think the lack of specific detail was a clue about Walt being an unreliable narrator.

4: “They only offered him the job because they feel bad for ripping him off!”

This is often linked with the previous argument, making the claim that they must have ripped him off back in the day because that’s why they offer him the job in Season 1, out of guilt.

Walt certainly seems to think that this is their motivation. He describes Elliott’s job offer as ‘face-saving bullshit’ in ’Grey Matter’ (1.05) and directly accuses Gretchen of ‘waving her chequebook around like a magic wand’ to make amends for stealing his work. In both instances, he makes these accusations in a fit of anger, showing how much inner resentment he holds towards them both. However, as mentioned above, when he makes his speech to Jesse in ‘Buyout’ he places the blame on himself for leaving the company. In this scene, he is calm, suggesting that he is talking about his past more objectively than in his previous statements.

And then we have how Gretchen and Elliott react to him throughout the series. When he attends Elliot’s birthday party, the atmosphere during their conversations is slightly awkward....but this is all coming from Walt’s end. When Walt and Skylar first arrive, Walt’s pleasantries are clearly forced but the Schwartzes look genuinely pleased to see him again. Walt is embarrassed by his cheap present of a Yum Good Ramen packet but Elliott is visibly moved by the momento of their college days. And when Walt and Elliott are alone reminiscing about their old professors, they’re both laughing enthusiastically and it’s the first time Walt looks comfortable ...until Elliott suggests that Walt come back to Grey Matter.

You would expect that if the Schwartzes had knowingly ripped off Walter’s research, or had an affair behind his back, there would be some embarrassment/shame from both of them upon seeing the man they screwed over at their party. In fact, you’d imagine they’d want to keep as much distance from him as possible! Why would they invite this man, this innocent victim of their manipulations, to their house where he could tell all their guests about how they ripped him off?

As well as their behaviour, Walt’s reactions to Gretchen and Elliott don’t make sense either. After arriving at Elliott’s party, it’s clear that Skylar has met them both before, showing that the two couples have maintained contact throughout the years, and Skylar seems unaware of any bad blood between the trio. When Walt bumps into another former classmate, he introduces Walt to his friends as a co-founder of Grey Matter and encourages him to describe his role in the company. However, upon getting this perfect opportunity to brag, Walt only mentions how he came up with the company name. And although his cheery facade at the party is not very convincing, he still accepted the invitation to a party he knew he wouldn’t enjoy and does his level best to appear happy. Why would he bother to do all this for a couple who ripped him off so badly? Why did he not completely sever contact with them as soon as he left the company?

Walt’s resentment towards his college friends is clear to the viewer but Elliott and Gretchen seem oblivious to his anger. When Elliott floats the idea of working together, he asks ‘why not?’ and ‘what’s stopping us?’ When Gretchen calls Walt at the end of 1.05 encouraging him to take their offer, she assumes that his reluctance is due to their former romantic relationship, not because of any professional jealousy. And when Walt argues with her in 2.05, she is completely shocked to hear his version of events, furiously responding ‘that cannot be how you see it!’

Walter seems to hold Gretchen and Elliott responsible for ruining his life but they never show signs of guilty behaviour towards their former partner. Perhaps they are sociopaths who are incapable of feeling remorse...or perhaps they’ve done nothing to feel guilty about.

Conclusion

Apart from one flashback where Walt and Gretchen discuss the elements of a human body, we don’t see any of the events regarding the early days of Grey Matter firsthand. It’s all conveyed by characters discussing the past through their own potentially biased perspective and it’s impossible to regard either Walt, Gretchen or Elliott as a definitive source. However, as you can see from this post and my conclusions, a lot of information can be gleamed from reading between the lines and paying attention to what is not being said.

Given the lack of direct evidence, a lot of this debate comes down to whose perspective is more reliable and the series demonstrates over and over again that Walt is not a trustworthy person. I think you’d be hard-pressed to find a single episode of the show that doesn’t show Walt telling at least one lie. Despite this, many fans who identify with Walt take his version of events at face value, without really examining how his arrogance and sense of victimhood have clouded his perspective.

After rewatching the show and getting a very different perspective on several characters a second time round, I’d encourage any fan of the show who strongly identified with Walter White to rewatch the series and this time, focus on getting into the heads of the characters he comes into conflict with. You might come away with a very different opinion. And a renewed sympathy.

Thanks for reading, this is my 1st post so any constructive criticism is welcome and any likes/reblogs would be very much appreciated :)

#breaking bad #walter white #heisenberg #grey matter #elliot schwartz #gretchen schwartz #vince gilligan

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worryinglyinnocent · 5 years ago

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Fic: Pure (5/14)

Summary: Belle wanted to wait until marriage before she had sex for the first time. It was the one thing that still stuck in her mind after leaving her small town upbringing steeped in religious doctrine and abstinence culture. When her wedding night comes, however, the purity ideals of Storybrooke’s sex education are hard to shake off, and making the transition from virgin to sexually active is more difficult than she anticipated. With the help of a patient husband, Belle begins an intimate journey into understanding her body, her desires, and her identity as a woman.

Rated: E

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[One] [Two] [Three] [Four] [AO3]

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Pure

Five

Gold had to admit that, prior to their wedding, he had not really given Belle’s virginity a lot of thought. Sex wasn’t the be all and end all of a relationship to him, and he’d been happy to wait for her. His own first time was so long ago and so unmemorable that he could hardly recall it.

In hindsight, he should probably have made more of an effort to discuss it with her so that they were both better prepared for the big night. In his defence, Belle had artfully shut down any conversation that he had tried to start on the subject, but he knew enough about her upbringing. He should have known that she wasn’t going to be magically completely relaxed about the whole thing when push came to shove.

The other reason that he had avoided the topic as much as Belle had was the fear that he’d end up patronising her. Belle lacked practical experience, but she didn’t lack knowledge. She was well-read; she didn’t need him to go back to basics. He didn’t want to treat her as clueless and naïve, but at the same time, the lack of communication between them on the subject had left him guessing him as to exactly how much she did know, and how many of the myths upheld by her incomplete education were lingering – her fears about hurting and bleeding on the first go being a case in point.

That was why he was so eager for her to set the boundaries of how far she was comfortable going at any time. He didn’t want to push her too hard and end up traumatising her, and he didn’t want her to push too hard in an effort to please him. He was sure she would have gone further last night; their current snail’s pace was at his insistence.

It was late into the evening when they got back to the hotel after the show, and Belle flopped back onto the bed with a resounding sigh of happiness and satisfaction.

“That was wonderful,” she said. “Normally, I’m one of those people who’ll always think that the book is better on principle, but I really enjoyed that. And I think there’s something special about seeing a show on Broadway. Well, apart from the price, of course.”

She held up her arms and Gold pulled her back into a sitting position.

“Aiden…”

“Yes?”

“Are you ok if we don’t do anything tonight? I’m exhausted and I just want to sleep.”

“Of course. We’ll take as long as it takes, you know that.”

“Yes, I know. But we’re on our honeymoon which sort of implies that we should be having all the sex, and we were kind of on a roll. I don’t want to lose the momentum and have to start all over again.”

Gold had to chuckle at that. “I’m pretty sure that sex is like riding a bike; it’s not something you forget how to do.”

“Hey, humour me here.” Belle batted his arm. “I’m still learning.”

“I know.” He leaned in to kiss her and Belle hooked her arms around his neck, pulling him in closer.

“I love you,” she said softly. “You’re so good to me. I don’t think that there can be many men as patient and understanding as you when it comes to all my stupid hang-ups.”

“They’re not stupid. Your feelings are always valid and should be respected.”

She let go of him and he began to get undressed.

“You’re not frustrated, are you?” There was genuine concern in her voice, her bottom lip worrying between her teeth.

“Not at you. None of this is your fault. I’m slightly exasperated by the town that you grew up in and their puritanical attitudes towards sex, though, I will admit that.”

“Well, that certainly makes two of us.”

“None of that’s directed at you, though.” Gold sighed, running a hand through his hair as he searched for the right words. “I’m just annoyed that it’s affected you so badly and knocked your confidence so much. You’ve overcome so much; we’ve laughed about all these ridiculous tales from your childhood in the past, and it’s sad that it’s had such a deep and lasting impact. At the same time, though, I don’t want to be too disparaging of it. It’s your home and your life, after all.”

“It’s my life, certainly, but I stopped thinking of Storybrooke as my home a long time ago.” Belle smiled. “You’re my home now. As long as I’ve got you, I can live anywhere. The moon if necessary.”

“Let’s hope it won’t be. There are no bookshops on the moon.”

Stripped down to his boxers, Gold went to brush his teeth; by the time he came back, Belle had changed into her pyjamas: a silky black camisole and shorts. He’d seen brief glimpses of them before when she’d stayed over in the summer, but something in his stomach still flip-flopped at the sight of her.

“You like?” Belle gave him a twirl as she headed towards the bathroom.

“Oh, very much so.”

Belle just grinned at him, and Gold got into bed, staring up at the ceiling and thinking about the last time he’d had sex with someone.

Cora had been an interesting rebound after Milah had left and taken Neal with her. It was a good thing that Neal had returned to his full custody when he had done and Cora had broken it off, unwilling to be considered as potential stepmother material. If they’d carried on much longer, the thing between them would almost certainly have turned toxic.

After that, Gold had sworn off women for life. Of course, all that had changed when he’d met Belle three years ago, but he’d had Neal cheering him on from the side lines all throughout his relationship with her.

Unlike his time with Belle, his relationship with Cora had been mostly sexual; they were completely incompatible in practically every other area except shrewd business sense. Even so, despite all the sex, he still felt closer to Belle, more intimate with her, than he had ever done with Cora. There was really no comparison.

He pushed the thoughts of Cora firmly out of his mind; he absolutely did not want to be thinking about his ex on his honeymoon, even if the thoughts were wholly negative.

Belle came out of the bathroom and slipped into bed beside him, cuddling in close. They were used to cuddling. Belle was an instinctively touchy-feely person and she hugged everyone; snuggling in close came second nature to her and it had never held any connotations of anything more. Even when they’d been curled up naked together on that first morning, they were enjoying the physical closeness more than anything.

Of course, having a naked Belle in his arms for the first time had certainly worked wonders for his own self-control. When she’d pulled her nightdress off and let him look his fill with only the slightest pretty blush rising in her cheeks, he’d been completely awestruck for what felt like an age.

He was glad that all her qualms about sex didn’t seem to stretch to nudity in front of him. Well, most of the time; she’d been rather out of sorts this morning, but Gold could piece two and two together with that one from what she’d told him of her dream and from the chaos in the bathroom. If he could convince her that masturbation was nothing to be embarrassed about and not necessarily something that should be hidden away, hopefully they would be well on their way to finding out what made her tick, and in doing so, making their moments together so much more enjoyable for the both of them.

Belle was still curled up close beside him when Gold woke the next morning, and he smiled. She could latch on like a limpet when she wanted to. For a long while, he just stared at the ceiling, waiting to feel her stir and wondering what would happen when she did; if she would have another episode like she had done the previous morning.

He brought his hand down beneath the covers to his cock, hard with morning glory and the closeness of a beautiful woman. At least that hadn’t freaked her out the first time she’d felt it. He wasn’t angry with her, far from it. Like he had said to her the previous evening, it was not their continued celibacy that concerned him, more the deeper-seated reasons for it, stemming from her childhood.

Gold was no psychologist and he didn’t have the first clue how to go about trying to break down the years of conditioning that Belle had been through. Looking at it in the cold light of day, he knew that he was just as out of his depth as she was, although in vastly different ways. He was stuck. It was all very well letting Belle take the lead and set the pace, but if she didn’t know what she was doing and was second-guessing herself all the way, then they would be in a constant stalemate. He didn’t want to rush her, but at the same time, it felt like she would probably need the guiding hand of someone more experienced to help her along and help her realise her needs and desires.

He shook his head, pushing unwelcome thoughts away and trying to see the positives as he slipped out of Belle’s hold on him and went into the bathroom. This would be a learning experience for the both of them, and they would come out of it all much stronger and with a much healthier sexual relationship. As opposed to the one they had now, which was non-existent and resulted in Belle having almost daily freak-outs. At least he knew that it wasn’t anything that he was doing that was causing her to freak out, more her own reactions to what she was doing. Or not even doing, just thinking. Honestly, some people, namely the ones who had taught Belle her most fundamental lessons about relationships, could take the whole ‘impure thoughts’ thing a little too far, in Gold’s opinion.

He looked in the mirror as he washed his hands, grimacing at what he saw there. He don’t know what about him had attracted Belle in the first place, he was simply grateful that she’d seen something worth pursuing, and he hoped to be able to keep that trust. She had not been at all covert about liking him in a romantic fashion. That wasn’t her problem.

Belle had overcome so much of her small-town upbringing that it seemed almost inconceivable that this one thing could have stayed with her for so long and affected her so badly. Perhaps it was because this had more of an impact on her self-worth, her moral value. Most of the other things that she had been taught and had since unlearned were so ridiculous and paradoxical that once she was out in the wider world and being influenced by a far different set of people and situations, they were easily forgotten about and explained away. Sex just wasn’t one of those things. It was a big thing that most people did, a phenomenon that was so incredibly widespread, yet so little talked about.

Even outside of Storybrooke’s closed-minded community, sex was still a taboo topic; just in different ways. It was still something that people didn’t talk about, but not because they weren’t supposed to be having it or even thinking about it. It wasn’t talked about because it just wasn’t. There was no rhyme or reason to it. Broken down to its base components, sex was just another thing that humans – that a lot of living creatures in fact – were able to do. It was neither a moral act nor an immoral one, it was just an act, and yet there was so much meaning attached to it. No wonder everyone was so obsessed by it.

His analogy the other morning seemed to have worked, so maybe the key to calming Belle down about the whole thing would be simply talking about it. It would be no good if, whilst seeking to break her free of the idea that good girls didn’t talk about sex, he didn’t talk to her about it. Communication was going to be key.

Deciding that staring at his reflection was making him morbid, he came back into the bedroom and slipped back between the still-warm sheets, taking Belle back in his arms just as she began to stir. She smiled up at him sleepily, and as she stretched, he noticed that her pyjama camisole had ridden low during the night, a little glimpse of nipple peeping out.

“Hey.” He leaned over to kiss her and she accepted him readily. “Did you sleep well?”

“Yes, thank you.”

“Better than last night?”

“Yeah.” Belle sighed and ran a hand through her hair, giving a rueful little chuckle. “I did make a bit of a fool out of myself yesterday morning, didn’t I?”

“It’s fine. You’re still learning. Once you learn that there’s nothing wrong in what you’re thinking, or dreaming for that matter, then I’m sure that you’ll be fine.”

“I know that there’s nothing wrong with it. I mean, on the surface I know that. I can tell myself time and again that there’s nothing wrong with it, that there’s no moral judgement on being sexually attracted towards my husband of all people; but knowing something doesn’t necessarily mean that you automatically believe it, or that it makes it any easier to forget what you knew before. Uff.” She rolled over out of his arms and planted her face firmly into the pillow. “Maybe I need a brain transplant,” she mumbled into the cotton.

Gold touched her arm. “Please don’t suffocate yourself, we’ve only been married for two days.”

She rolled over again and smiled, carding her fingers through his hair, playing with the ends of it.

“What shall we do today?” she asked.

“I don’t know. What do you have down on our crammed itinerary?”

“Well, there are all kinds of places that we could visit. I’d love to see the Met. But I didn’t make any set plans for today. There’s nothing booked, nowhere that we need to be at any particular time.”

There was something hopeful in her eyes, perhaps a little questioning as well, but ultimately Gold thought that he knew what she was driving at. She just needed him to take the lead, and Gold needed to hope that he wasn’t misreading her signals.

“Well, I suppose that we have been very busy with sightseeing these past couple of days, and it would probably do us good to have a more relaxed morning. And even if we don’t get to see everything that you want to see during this stay, it’s not like we’ll never have the opportunity to come to New York ever again.”

Belle grinned, and Gold knew that he had hit the right note.

“So, since we’re both awake, did you have any ideas about how you’d like to spend our relaxed morning?”

“I was thinking about the, erm, vehicle maintenance analogy from the other day.” Belle’s cheeks were flushing a little pinker. “I was hoping that we might explore that some more. Maybe continue on from where we left off the other night?”

Gold nodded, finally chancing to adjust her fallen camisole strap, his fingers brushing over her nipple as he did so. He felt her twitch under his touch, the little bud pebbling under his fingertips.

“Yeah,” Belle murmured. “Like that.”

He continued to touch her nipple through the silk for a while, before chancing to skim his hand a little lower until it was resting on her hip, the tip of his thumb hooked inside her shorts.

“I want to find out what makes you feel good, Belle. I want you to find that out too. I just don’t want you to feel uncomfortable about it. So, if you’re not comfortable, just tell me to stop, ok?”

Belle nodded. “I don’t think that you could ever make me feel uncomfortable. I trust you.”

“I’m glad.”

He began to pull her shorts down a little way, and Belle wriggled them off. He slipped his hand back round to her ass, about as far as he had got on their first night in New York, and he squeezed her cheek gently.

“What are you thinking about?” Belle’s voice was low and full of desire, but the question was a genuine one.

“Huh?”

“You’ve got your thinking face on.” She pressed a finger to the bridge of his nose. “You’ve got that little frown line. I’m the one who’s supposed to be overthinking everything, not you.”

“Yeah, I am thinking.” As much as he wanted to find out what made Belle tick, he wanted her to be an active participant in that process as well. She had already been taught that sex was something that happened to her, not something that she should want to take an enthusiastic part in, and he didn’t want to perpetuate that notion even if what was being done to her was much more pleasurable than simply being rutted like an animal. “I think, maybe, it would be more… educational and enjoyable if you took the lead.”

“What?” Belle sounded unsure, her earlier confidence waning.

“Well, like I said, I want to find out what you like, and I want you to find out what you like too. Maybe we can do that together. If you find out what you like, then I can follow your lead. You know your own body better than I do, after all.”

“I don’t know about that.” Belle sighed, before finding Gold’s hand on her ass and lacing her fingers through his. “I think I’m flying as blind as you are here.”

“There’s no sin in knowing what makes you feel good,” Gold said. As much as he hated to be using the word ‘sin’ in the context of the bedroom, considering the problems Belle already had with its connotations, but it felt like the one that would resonate with her the most.

“I know. I just…” Belle tailed off. “Isn’t this supposed to be about two people? Something that I have to do with my husband and no one else? Part of me assumes that includes doing it with myself as well.”

“I’m not going anywhere. Just because you’re doing some exploring yourself doesn’t mean that I can’t get in on the action too.”

Belle giggled. “OK. I guess when you put it like that. I don’t know that I’ll be any good at it. I mean, you saw what happened yesterday morning.”

“I’m still not entirely sure what happened yesterday morning other than you had a sex dream involving fauns in Central Park, and the bathroom looked like a small bomb had hit it when I went in there.”

“I was trying to take a look, you know, down there. With my compact. And then I managed to overthink everything, like normal, and I caused a small make-up catastrophe.”

“I see.” Well, that certainly explained that in full and confirmed some of his suspicions.

“So, you can see why I don’t have any more of a clue what’s going on between my legs than you do.” Belle managed to keep holding his gaze for a few seconds more before looking away in embarrassment, but she didn’t pull away from him, her breasts still pressed up against his chest. Gold untangled his fingers from hers and gently turned her face back towards his.

“Well, maybe it’s something that we can work out together. And if I’m here with you, then there’s no need to worry about doing anything without me.”

Belle nodded. “No, I guess you’re right. I like this loophole.”

Whilst it probably wasn’t a good idea for her to be thinking of it as a loophole, Gold would take whatever progress in the right direction he could get.

“So, how do we start?” Belle asked.

“Well, it would probably be a good idea if we could see what we were doing.” Whilst most couples’ first times would be consist of fumbling in the dark – his own certainly had done – this was no ordinary first time, and maybe a clear line of sight would be better. He began to push the covers down off them and Belle helped, showing no signs of self-consciousness. She was comfortable in her own skin for the most part, it was just when she started doing things to that skin that her troubles began.

“Now what?”

“Do you trust me?”

Belle laughed softly. “You already know that I do, Aiden. I’d trust you with my life, and I definitely trust you with this.”

“OK. So, what were you doing yesterday morning? How were you, well, positioned, for want of a better word.”

Belle sat up, grabbing the pillows and pluffing them up against the headboard, then she looked over at him, looking nervous again.

“Aiden, will you hold me?” she asked quietly. “I don’t know why, but I feel safer when you’re holding me. I feel less like there’s some unseen force watching me.”

“Of course. You know, we can stop any time you want to.” Gold sat back against the headboard and Belle settled herself between his thighs, leaning back against him his chest with a contented little sigh and bringing his arms around her middle. Gold pressed little kisses to her shoulder and the side of her neck, and Belle gave a little grunt of pleasure.

“I don’t want to stop,” she said eventually. “I just don’t want to feel like I’m being watched when we do it.”

They stayed sitting in that aspect for a while, until Belle let her legs fall open and slowly brought one hand down between them. Gold watched over her shoulder as she parted her nether lips.

“I don’t know where to start,” she mumbled. “I’ve read so much, and I’ve seen enough pictures, but I still don’t know where to start when it comes to touching myself.”

“May I touch you?”

“Yes!” It was so quiet and so desperate at the same time, almost a plea, and for a moment, Gold didn’t move. This moment, touching Belle so intimately for the first time, well, it felt like it needed some kind of gravitas about it, not that any of his previous first encounters with women had had anything of the sort. Everything was more intense with Belle, and not just because of the long wait before anything had happened.

He slipped a finger between her folds, gently seeking out her clit and coaxing it out from its hood, rubbing little circles around the little nub as it swelled for him. Belle was wriggling in his arms, a little sob-like gasp escaping her.

“All right?”

“Yes. Yes, I like that.”

He kept touching her, listening to her moans and gasps, feeling every eager twitch of her hips, until her hand caught his and she whispered for him to stop.

“Are you ok?” He wasn’t alarmed per se, but he’d already decided that talking was going to be their biggest asset as they went on this journey of discovery together.

“Yes, yes, I’m fine, it feels good, it’s just… too good, if you know what I mean. It’s too much.”

Gold moved his fingertip away from her clit, rubbing along her folds. He could feel that she was getting wetter, not dripping with arousal but he was definitely spreading warm slickness around as he touched her, and the feel of it made his cock surge into eager life, demanding to sink into that wonderful wet heat. Belle shifted in his arms again as he continued to touch her, rubbing up against his erection, and Gold groaned with the friction. Belle glanced at him over her shoulder; her eyes were wide and bright with want and her face was very flushed, but she didn’t seem uneasy, not yet at least.

He gave a final stroke along her folds and paused at her entrance.

“Are you ready for a finger inside?”

She hesitated, which in Gold’s book meant no. If she wasn’t comfortable enough to say yes immediately, then she wasn’t comfortable enough, period, and she eventually shook her head.

“No. Not right now. I think about it, and I kind of clench up inside.”

“Ok. Not this time then.” He went back to touching along her folds, circling her clit, and she gave a little squeal and giggle of pleasure.

In spite of himself, Gold felt an immense swell of pride. This was supposed to be Belle’s time, working out what she liked and mentally noting it down for future reference, but he liked knowing that he was making her feel good and helping her learn. He was definitely doing something right.

“That’s good?”

“That’s wonderful,” Belle gasped. “I think my brain’s about to melt.”

She wriggled away from his touch, turning over in his arms so that she was facing him, going up on her knees to kiss him, her hands tangled in his mussed hair and her lips fierce and more dominating that she’d ever been, her tongue pressing insistently at his lips. He opened for her readily, pulling her in close. He didn’t know if she’d come or not, but even if she hadn’t, it was still a victory for her pleasure. There would be plenty of time for more in due course.

“What about you?” Belle asked eventually; once she finally let him up for air. “What do you like?”

Her fingers were hovering over the tented front of his boxers, and Gold took her hand, placing it on his cock so that she could feel the heat of him through the silk. She was flushing again, the blush reaching down from her cheeks and neck to disappear under her camisole, and for a moment Gold was worried that they had gone too far. Then her fingers were curling into the waistband of his underwear and she looked up at him, her bottom lip nibbling between her teeth.

“May I?”

“Absolutely.”

Together they pulled his boxers down and off, and Belle traced a gentle fingertip up his length, making him groan.

“Good?”

“You have no idea.”

She kept stroking him, letting Gold cover her hands with his and guide her movements, tightening her grip on him a little until every touch felt like sheer heaven.

“Belle,” he gasped. “Belle, I’m going to come.” Belle kept a hold of him, and he spurted thickly over their joint hands. “Fuck!”

For a long time, he could only sit there in boneless bliss as his cock softened in her grip, panting at the force of the wonderful release, before Belle let go of him and grabbed a handful of tissues from the nightstand to clean up.

“That was great,” he managed to garble eventually, although it seemed such faint praise. Still, all things considered, this was definitely a step in the right direction, and he had high hopes for the rest of their honeymoon.

It was their last night in New York, and in a way, Gold was going to be sad to leave this hotel room that had been the scene of so much discovery. Although they had still not officially consummated their marriage, they had come so far in the week and a half since that first night that the fact Gold’s cock had not yet been inside Belle was a mere technicality.

There was still a long way to go; Belle was still nervous about the whole concept, and it was true that he seemed to be doing most of the initiating whenever things took a more intimate turn, but it seemed that Belle was happy for it to be that way. If he initiated things, then she could follow his lead, and she trusted him to steer her in the right direction if she was floundering. He only hoped that he could continue to be worthy of that trust once the honeymoon period was over and they were settling back into a normal day-to-day life in Boston.

It was going to be strange having Belle in his bed. They’d cohabited for a while, but she had never yet slept in his bed. It was going to take some getting used to. He’d adjusted to having a second person in bed with him whilst they had been in hotel rooms; but there was something different about it being in his own home. His bedroom was his sanctuary, a place that had just been his for so many years now, and he felt a little nervousness of his own about welcoming Belle into that space. It would be a place for both of them now, and he was anxious that she should feel as at ease in it as he did. It was not the first time that he had considered keeping Belle’s room made up for her – not that he envisaged them sleeping apart at any point, but because he knew how important it was to have a space of one’s own in which to relax and be content.

He should probably be trying to get to sleep rather than thinking about the future; they had an early flight back to Boston tomorrow morning, but for some reason, staring at the ceiling was proving to be coming to him much more easily than sleep was. Beside him, Belle shifted. Was she awake too?

“Aiden?” That would be a yes, then. “Are you awake?”

“Yes.”

“Me too.” She groped around under the covers in the darkness, eventually finding his hand and squeezing. He wondered what she was thinking, and if her thoughts were wending in the same direction his were. Whilst they’d talked about sex quite a bit whilst they’d been in the middle of intimate encounters, it wasn’t something that they had really discussed all that much outside of the heat of the moment. It wasn’t something that he’d ever been able to draw Belle out on before, and he had always let her shut down the conversation, figuring that it would happen once they were married. As it was, it was still a subject she seemed to avoid like the plague.

He brought their linked hands up to his lips and kissed her knuckles, working his way down her arm to her shoulder, neck, chin and finally her mouth. One thing that had been firmly established throughout all of their time in bed together had been that if Belle was at all uncomfortable, she would tell him to stop, and he would stop. Right now, though, she wasn’t telling him to stop. She was kissing him back with a fervent hunger, her arms sliding around his back to pull him in closer, her legs falling apart to allow him in between.

She was wearing her wedding nightdress again, and Gold pulled the straps down gently to expose her breasts, kissing and licking at her nipples. She was so sensitive there, and Gold was more than happy to oblige the little wriggles and moans that he had come to learn meant she was enjoying herself and wanted more. He longed to make his way further down and taste even more of her, but when he had gone lower than her breasts before, she’d stopped him, saying that it didn’t feel quite right just yet. Maybe in the future, once they were much more comfortable with each other, he could revisit the prospect.

He slipped a hand under the hem of her nightdress, pushing it up as he stroked up her thigh, finding nothing beneath the silk but soft nether curls and the beginnings of a ready wetness. Pressing the tip of his thumb into her slit, he began to rub gently, coaxing out her pearl and circling around it, but never directly on it.

“Aiden,” she breathed, pulling him back up from her breasts so that she could kiss him again. “Oh, Aiden, that feels wonderful.”

As far as Gold knew, Belle had not yet had an orgasm. She had enjoyed what they’d done together; he knew that she didn’t have the experience or guile to fake pleasure so convincingly, but that moment of ecstasy proved elusive, as if she plateaued after a while. She didn’t seem frustrated by it, and Gold didn’t want to push the point, knowing that although he wanted Belle to feel the joy of an orgasm, a large part of his wanting her to have one probably played into satisfying his own ego.

He pressed a fingertip against her entrance, and she nodded enthusiastically, her hips giving a little jerk as he began to push a finger up inside her, stroking gently at her inner walls. It had taken her a while to get used to the sensation the first time he had done it, but now she was relaxed, and her body was clutching at him, welcoming him eagerly. He pressed a second finger in, circling them a little and making Belle moan as he continued to work at her clit with his thumb.

God, he loved seeing her like this, coming undone for him without a care in the world.

“Aiden, I think I’m ready,” Belle panted.

“Ready for what?” His heart began to beat almost painfully fast, not wanting to get ahead of himself.

“I think I’m ready to properly lose my virginity.” Her face was almost beet red, and Gold couldn’t tell how much of that was embarrassment and how much was arousal. Her bottom lip was worrying between her teeth again, but her eyes were bright and whilst there was a little nervousness in them, there was no fear.

Gold slowly pulled his fingers out of her and took his cock in hand, pumping his length a couple of times to coat himself with Belle’s slick juices, before resettling his weight and lining up with her entrance.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.” Belle nodded, and Gold began to push in, as gradually as he could possibly manage. He bit down on his tongue to try and ground him and stop him from going too far too quickly and hurting her. He had promised her that the first time wouldn’t hurt, and he could not go back on that now. When he was about halfway in, Belle gave a little gasp.

“Belle? Are you all right?”

“Yes. You’re thicker than your fingers. Just a bit. It’s not painful. Just… strange.”

Gold nodded, giving a little huff of laughter. Yes, strange was probably a good word for it. Still, it would probably be a good idea not to go any further, at least not tonight. The sheer bliss of being inside Belle’s wonderful wet heat was more than enough for him for now, and he began to pull out, giving quick, shallow thrusts that almost undid him there and then. She was tight around him but relaxed enough for it not to be worrying, and whilst she was breathing heavily, her pants a harmonious counterpoint to his own ragged breath, her face showed no discomfort.

“Oh Belle, my love. You are glorious, and I love you.”

His climax was hard and sudden, taking him by surprise. He hadn’t realised just how keyed up he had been by the prospect of being inside Belle after so much sweet anticipation. He gave a little grunt as he came down from the high, resting his forehead against Belle’s.

“Sorry,” he panted. “I should have warned you.”

“It’s fine.” Belle stole a kiss. “Now that, I was prepared for.”

He pulled out of her as he began to soften, rolling onto his side and bringing Belle with him. She was smiling, although her cheeks were still flushed, and he pushed a lock of hair out of her face.

“We did it,” she said softly.

“We certainly did.” Gold kissed her gently, little butterfly kisses to her lips and chin. “How do you feel?”

“Fine.” Belle sounded surprised by her own answer. “It’s strange. I don’t feel any different. Having sex for the first time was always built up as such a big thing, I suppose I was expecting something akin to an anime magical girl transformation sequence when I lost my virginity. But I’m still the same Belle that I was before.”

“Well, of course you are. Sex is just another thing our bodies can do. An enjoyable thing…”

“A very enjoyable thing.”

“…but it doesn’t change who you are. You’re still you, whether you’re a virgin or not.”

“I’m definitely not now.”

It was a statement, and it didn’t appear to have anything weighted in it, but as they lay in the cooling, Gold couldn’t help but wonder how Belle was feeling about the whole situation.

“I love you,” he whispered to her. “And no matter what happens, I’ll always love you.”

Belle kissed the end of his nose. “I love you too.”

She sounded happy, and for the moment, that was all that mattered. Whatever happened next, they would deal with it together. Gold was sure of it.

#rumbelle fic #rumbelle #Belle French #Mr Gold #Fic: Pure

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crowstan · 4 years ago

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How I see each house due to my friends

A side note before I begin: I can Not spell, so you will see me using different words throughout this, instead of my usual speaking words that I Can pronounce, so apologies for that lmao. The order of each section will be: ravenclaw, slytherin, hufflepuff, gryffindor, and outliers. The outliers get their own category because I refuse to put them with the rest of the data, you’ll see why.

Ravenclaw:

The people:

Leave her johnny, leave her: A good friend, we talk about stuff sometimes. Usually it’s her talking about legend of Zelda. I quite like her.

A pal: From India. Their English isn’t the best, but I can still understand them. Likes to talk about Disney movies and how Elsa deserves a girlfriend, and has called Disney a coward many times because they most likely won’t give her one.

Great British Bake off: From Brittan. Where, I have no clue. Likes to talk about how the law and justice system needs to be changed, and about her family sometimes, usually when prompted. I have no idea what she’s talking about half the time because I’m American, and that sometimes leads to funny misunderstandings.

Done with school: We haven’t talked a lot, but lives in the same state as me. Is completely done with their schoolmates, their school, the teachers, and with life. Often jokes about wanting to become a 7/11 crypt.

Wholesome: We talked for a while, and then somehow our conversation got deleted and I haven’t been able to find them since. Really like astronomy, and told me cool facts about the horoscopes, galaxies, and even a bit about stars. I miss them :,(

In conclusion: Ravenclaws most likely have a passionate topic they know a lot about, and are eagerly willing to share every bit of knowledge they have to teach you about it. They may even ramble about the topic for no reason and without prompting. They also really like learning for the sake of learning, and usually despise school because it “ruins learning” (source: me, Leave her johnny leave her, Great British Bake off, Done with school). Can sometimes lack common sense and “smarts” in some subjects, but excel in others. Also usually lgbt+ or a huge supporter of lgbt+ rights, and other rights movements such as black lives matter. I generally vibe with them very well.

Slytherin:

The people:

Bestie in the form of three ounces of whoop-ass: My best friend! We talk about psychology, mental health, psychological disorders, the apocalypse, and religion quite a bit. Some defining traits she has is: willing to fight for the smaller/weaker person, has good morals, is a chaotic neutral, a moral grey character, loves bloody anime and vocaloid.

Laid back: No offense to him, but he’s not the brightest. Can be snarky at times, but is usually more willing to let others do the talking and observe. Also may possibly be a people pleaser but I haven’t done much looking into that. Tbh I’m kinda scared of him.

Quakeing: Has adhd. Can sometimes be a dick, but it’s usually not intentional. Is actually pretty good at debate, not sure if she knows it. Is almost the perfect human version “Yes, BUT-” and “So?”

In conclusion: Mostly crackheads. Are also good friends. Some are trustworthy, some are not, just always be cautious.

Hufflepuff:

The people:

Owo?: Very soft. Doensnt really like conflict that much. Will fight you if you’re mean to yourself. Has talked me out of doing various... “Experiments”, especially the kind involving people in any way or involving scissors. Would not let me try to make an airplane out of playing cards. She does encourage my writing, and sometimes likes it. Is very positive.

In conclusion: A mom friend that won’t let me do anything I consider “fun”. Often passive, but cares about their friends, and won’t let them do anything that could result in even a potential scratch. Very nice to be around, hufflepuffs have calm vibes. They simply radiate calm. I have not met one that didn’t, tbh.

The people:

I call them K because I can’t spell their name right and at this point I’m too afraid to ask: Likes to be in charge. We don’t talk much, but they do have some dumbass/crakhead energy from what I can tell. May be a facade. Can be a little hot headed but mostly isn’t, haven’t seen them get too mad. Yet.

In conclusion: Somehow the only gryffindor I’ve met? I don’t know enough of these people to make any actual claims, because it could be a gryffindor thing or a personal thing, and I have no way of telling.

Outliers:

Furry: Hufflepuff. Excluded because they took too long to reply. Also a dumbass. Isn’t into harry potter but says that from what she was told, hufflepuff is the windclan of hogwarts. I have no idea what that means.

An ex long gone: Slytherclaw like me. Didn’t want to put him on the list twice, plus he fucked up all my data. Claimed that he hates anyone who lies, proceeded to lie to me, and then claimed he was doing the right thing. I only cut him off recently. he also frequently talked down to me like I was a dumb child. I did enjoy his company but in hindsight I really shouldn’t have had. Added him because he’s the only person that has the same 50/50 house mix as me.

The shape of friend: I think their house is hufflepuff? They wear a lot of hufflepuff merch, and are really sweet and loyal. Honestly, a good person, too pure. I really like them, even if we don’t talk a lot. Also somewhat shy. Didn’t add because I’m not actually sure of their house, and I didn’t want any of the sections to be inaccurate.

Is this even human?: An online friend. Doesn’t like to stick to one house, prefers to switch houses based off of mood and what they’re doing at the moment. Shouldn’t even be on this list but I thought I should add them anyway. Can barely function as a human, forgets to eat sometimes, has spent a full day and a half sleeping. Honestly, a whole ass mood.

Final thoughts: Most of my friends fit their stereotypes, and have a few bits in common that I, ultimately, associate with each house. This is in no way accurate to each house, as I can sometimes perceive things wrong (Example: this semester in science, in which I thought I understood earths plate movement, only to fail my test because apparently, what I had gathered was incorrect, even though it was what was taught). Anyway, this was quite fun to put together, and I quite enjoyed being able to do this.

#slytherclaw #slytherin #ravenclaw #hufflepuff #gryffindor #im sorry yall

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frigfridge · 5 years ago

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just finished rewatching toy story 1 thru 3 over the past few days, wanted to share my thoughts:

i love these movies a whole lot. the first 2 hold a bunch of nostalgia for me because i was A Baby when 2 came out and when i was also A Baby i would just watch our VHS copy of toy story 1 over and over again. this also makes me the exact age group to be emotionally destroyed by toy story 3, which came out just as i was entering high school and hit really close to home

individual thoughts:

toy story: the first thing i noticed was it still looks really nice even watching in 2019!! which i think is kind of spectacular for the first feature-length computer-animated film. it no doubt helps that the plot is mostly focused on little plastic dolls without realistic hair or clothing to animate but the semi-”cartoon” art direction means the human characters also look pretty nice without going too far into the uncanny valley.

also, the plot is WAY darker than i remember?? not because of sid and all the body horror toys, but because for like half of the movie woodys friends think hes an actual (toy) murderer carrying around the severed arm of his victim (!!) like, its hilarious, but also wow theres a LONG way to go between there and the climax of toy story 3.

the soundtrack is probably my favorite of the bunch. part of that is probably nostalgia but i just really like the consistency of having randy newman singing every song. it sort of elevates him to part of the story, like an omniscient narrator singing woodys (and later buzzs) inner monologue. 2 (and especially 3) didnt have as many musical numbers, which i can understand with a shift to a larger-scale approach to storytelling, but i really like the feeling it gives number 1. “you got a friend in me” is an obvious classic thats been remixed and brought back in just about every piece of toy story media im aware of, but “strange things” and “i will go sailing no more” deserve just as much recognition and praise. there just isnt a weak number among them

toy story 2: heres where the story started getting bigger and more existential, which basically becomes the new direction of the series. which makes sense! this one released 4 years after the first, and while theres no real timeskip in the story (maybe 6 months?) it had been a little while since we last saw woody and the gang. everybody in the real world had gotten older, and with the turn of the millennium approaching, the theme of impermanence loomed large in the collective unconscious. well, maybe not in my unconscious, because i was 2. but its really interesting as kind of a “time capsule” to what people were thinking about as the 90s came to a close.

so toy story 2 was a little more grounded, a little more focus on the human world, but it was also more fantastical in its presentation. the opening “video game” sequence (which still looks amazing!!) and woodys nightmare (”i dont wanna play with you anymore...”) show the animators at pixar really found their groove and started getting experimental. and to great result!! the fantasy sequences are a lot of fun and help 2 really stand out.

i would be remiss not to mention jessies flashback song here. its something else they hadnt really done in the first film and i think it really works. jessie in this film unfortunately doesnt get to do much other than fight with woody about whether he should stay or go (except for when she saves him in the end) but this song makes her character work. it also helps that it destroys me every time

also i think this is the movie that gave me an appreciation for the acting of kelsey grammer. i dont really agree with his politics (i also dont know specifically what they are) but he is a damn fine actor and gives the prospector a very genuinely intimidating edge after his heel turn. the casting really makes the character here, but thats nothing new for toy story-- every voice works. if i were the casting director, i probably wouldnt have pulled erudite kelsey grammer for a character named “stinky pete,” but as it is now i couldnt imagine him voiced by anyone else.

the last thing about toy story 2 is it feels like there were a lot more pop culture references? at least as far as i noticed. there are apparently even more than i noticed but i caught on to the “also sprach zarathustra” riff in the opening, and the jurassic park rearview mirror gag. and of course the extended star wars reference with zurg vs. utility belt buzz (and i guess zurg in general.) the references are cute and mostly unobtrusive but really i could take or leave them.

oh yeah also al is hilarious. just this rude, neurotic businessman whos incredibly self-important for the owner of a minor(?) toy store chain. hes such a puffed-up jerk, every time hes on-screen is a delight

toy story 3: this one kills me to death. i always get misty-eyed during “when somebody loved me” but the ending of 3 where andy introduces his toys to bonnie and plays with them one last time made me sob the first time i watched it. and it still does! thats the long game right there, thats the payoff of over 10 years loving these characters. its an emotional ketchup bomb, everything gets all messy and soggy and sweet. hopefully 4 can follow up, but im not really worried about that-- ive heard some good things. damn, its been 9 years since this movie came out, though! it really doesnt feel all that long, but i guess i havent been doing all that much

i actually dont know if i have much else to say about 3. the opening with the re-imagining of the previous films openings (woody versus one-eyed bart, buzz and woody vs. the evil dr. porkchop) is a highlight, although theres a conspicuous lack of bo peep. ive heard she has a big part in 4, but it was kind of weird to see a lot of toys missing and their absence (mostly) glossed over after the first few minutes. i miss r.c. and lenny, but i get they wanted to narrow down the cast so all of them could get in on the plot.

speaking of which, the escape scene is great too. its kind of a crystallizing moment of how close these characters are, and how well they work together. it reminds me a lot of the escape from sids house in the first movie, but there woody was working with sids body-horror toys and seemed to strike up a rapport with them bizarrely quickly. (speaking of which, i miss those toys! their designs were super cool, but i cant imagine they got much merchandise, especially babyface with the sharp, metal spider legs.) here, though, woody and the gang cooperate the best they ever have, and it really paints a picture of how close theyve become over the years, and justifies the emotional climax in the landfill. this is what i was talking about when i said i was surprised how dark toy story 1 got! these toys all hated woodys guts back then for what they thought he did to buzz. they kicked him out of a moving truck! its just weird to think about that conflict between them when you know how long they end up sticking together. but thats, like, neat, so its ok. it feels earned, its just kind of crazy in hindsight.

toy story 3 was also obviously made long after the first two-- by comparison, the lighting is way more sophisticated, the humans are a lot more detailed. theres just a lot more detail In General. the main cast is, like, super dirty for the middle 90% of the film, and it feels like, yeah, We Have This Technology Now. we can render so many individual glitter sprinkles suck to hamms ass and they will be in every single scene. the “fur tech” on lotso and buster is also an obvious clue, especially in the flashback to lotso trudging through the rain back to his owners house. its like “look! we can make this teddy bear SO wet!” and wow! yeah! you did! so wet!

lotso himself is also an interesting villain in terms of sheer bastardness. he is just a huge jerk. he could have hit that button so easily! and he was so mean to the baby! but at the same time hes a great character in how he slowly “changes” throughout the movie. he is kind of an obvious “pixar ‘twist’ villain” but again, the amazing performance by ned beatty really saves him. also he does get a nice comeuppance at the end, which was necessary because hes really the biggest villain in the series so far. hes knowingly malicious and doesnt have any greater motive, hes just an embittered megalomaniac who (apparently) has sent other toys to be broken, thrown away, and incinerated at the landfill. he honestly deserves worse than being strapped to the front of a truck but it works for a family movie.

i have a couple more thoughts on 3 (i guess i did have a fair amount of stuff to say about it) but im getting tired of writing. the music is good as usual, but the vocal stuff being entirely back-loaded (in the credits) is a bit disappointing since ive always been a fan of the songs, but i get that they were going for something different. the jokes about ken being, uh, ‘flamboyant’ felt out of place, mostly the one at the end (”uh, buzz? barbie didnt write this”) because it comes from one of the gang and not unnamed lotso goon #3, but i guess its pretty tame in the scheme of things.

overall im really looking forward to seeing what 4 does with the series. whew!

#hopefully ill see 4 this weekend #personal essay #got pretty honkin long. click at your own risk

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daeneryses · 6 years ago

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okay so I KNOW NO ONE ASKED but im stil gonna comment on the episode

ofc its filled w spoilers and under a read more

how the hell is the death count so freaking low. plot armor at its FINEST i could have sworn sam was ab to bite it at like 3 different times. also brienne jaime and podrick (at least one of them should have died and u KNOW IT). i know some characters have to be alive bc KL but???? what are the odds mate they were being fucking massacred. also conveniently all the dothraki died i gues to make it seem like they really lost smth while conveniently not killing off named characters

how is greyworm still alive

how did we only lose five (5) named characters in the battle WHAT ARE THE FUCKING ODDS. they didnt burn edd’s body i’m ;___; that’s all he wanted

no one important died at the crypts not even VARYS can u believe

so i guess i’m mad at how we all built up so much anticipation over this chapter, the longest episode ever, longest battle in cinematographic history, and then nothing happened??? i mean yeah jorah died i was DEVASTATED bc my dude kept on fighting even with 63 stab wounds and theon who got to die protecting his little brother and little lyanna killed a giant!!! but ????

i also CANT believe how useless dany and jon were. Jon mostly. he really was about to die yelling at a wight dragon im sorry but i have to laugh. at least dany set some wights on fire what did jon do. YOU TWO HAD D R A G O N S that should have been a real game changer but they were playing tag with viserion.

ALSO

that was it???? the big threat that was looming over westeros for 7 seasons is just gone??? how did the NK survive being ROASTED but with a stabby stab he was dead. i am so confused what even was that. im conflicted because arya did that!!!! she really saved the day but it shouldnt have been that easy, how did she even sneak up on him, weren’t all of his WW watching???? also so many wights? how did she fight that i just---????

so now the main threat is cersei which i ?????? WHAT

she was right all along how HILARIOUS is that. her plan might work that’s just so fckin ridiculous i dont even have WORDS

episode 4 better fucking deliver and answer many questions bc i am not satisfied at all

but it wasnt all bad!!!! the scene where the dothraki get obliterated sent chills down my spine i have to admit it. also, all those who died died really good and worthy deaths, except maybe edd.

brienne and jaime saving each other several times was great.

the hound overcoming his fear of fire to go save arya was very sweet and emotional.

arya in general was very very fucking good this episode, her fights were amazing i can’t imagine how much maisie had to train. she owns the episode imo (not just bc of the final scene). Arya fighting with the weird ass weapon gendry made her? a V I S U A L. the scene where she’s hiding in the library was very good imo, it made me very tense i was so nervous it’s ridiculous how invested i was. arya with the arrows? i loved it, she was just overall amazing.

also beric dying after he saved arya bc that was his great purpose made me emo.

so im not mad ab arya doing it, it was a good twist bc everyone thought it’d be jon and it shows that azor ahai is bullshit. but the execution was so fucking anti climatic and LAZY. they should have dropped more clues throughout the series bc all we had was the whole speech mel gave her back in season 2 WHICH NO ONE COULD HAVE GUESSED BECAUSE SHE ACTUALLY BECOMES AN ASSASSIN OFC SHE WOULD SHUT BLUE EYES NOT ONLY WHITE WALKERS HAVE BLUE EYES.

but well i guess next episode will have to answer some questions huh.

also i really hope they drop the whole tyrion x sansa thingy they tried to give us bc im huuuuuhh not feeling it. at all.

its a well directed episode, it gave us some amazing visuals, some very emotional moments, but if they wanted to pull off such a twist like the one i just witnessed they had to earn it throughout the entire SERIES. arya should have had more screen time throughout the series, they should have dropped more foreshadowing that would make us go :0 in hindsight.

idk man

BUT SHE DID THAT!!! I CAN ONLY HOPE EVERYONE GIVES HER THE RECOGNITION SHE DESERVES AT WINTERFELL. HELL AT WESTEROS!!!!! the princess who was promised. i expect everyone bending BACKWARDS for her they owe her so much. she should just dip out now and go love a happy peaceful life no one deserves her.

#got spoilers #got rant

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bigskydreaming · 5 years ago

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so i read robin year one after seeing your posts about it and i really liked it! you got any other dick grayson recs? also i thought this was the comic where the juvie origin comes from but it wasn't there. from what comic was it then?

Gah, see the problem I have with reccing comic book stories, especially that far back is like…..almost all the way across the board, the stories I’m most…partial to or whatever, I’m still not 100% on board with, you know? Like, for as many elements about them that work, there’s things that bug the crap out of me, so my enjoyment of or positive associations with most comic book arc…..its usually not about the arcs over all, so much as….there were specific things within those arcs that I really liked and I pretty much just channel my focus onto those parts and idk…..willfully try not to focus on the parts that bugged the crap out of me. LOL. If that makes any sense at all?

I mean, just in terms of general eras, one good thing about the 90s Batbooks is they were really good about having each of the Bat characters regularly and consistently be DETECTIVES as much as they were superheroes and crime fighters. There’s tons of good stuff from the 90s specifically, in the vein of showcasing just how freaking smart Dick is and following him through his process in solving his various cases or tracking down different villains.

BUUUUUT….that’s also where most of the “Dick is a cop” crap is located during his daytime hours, and. I just. Can not express the depths of loathing I have for the decision to make Dick Grayson of all people a cop. It just. No. It doesn’t work for me, at all, on any level. The kid most specifically fucked over and mishandled by an uncaring system, growing up to be a servant of that very system? Nope, nope, nope times a million. Dick Grayson is a vigilante, has been a vigilante since he was a child, specifically because he’s someone who puts his faith, his trust, in individuals rather than institutions.

Its not just a matter of like….

Eh, okay, disengaging, lol. I need to nope right off that particular subject because when I start down THAT particular rabbit hole, I don’t come out the other side for a very long time and I just do not have time for that currently. LMAO. But anyway.

Like…yeah, so that’s the problem I have with recommending specific Nightwing solo arcs specifically…..because on the one hand, I want to point to a lot of stuff from that time period because of everything Dick was doing in costume…..while like….rapidly flipping through every page where he’s not in costume. LOLOL.

So this is a tough one. I tend to say you can’t really go wrong with any of the older Titans stuff… even when its not that great, with a couple of glaring exceptions its not BAD, at least as opposed to when things are bad in the Batbooks and Dick’s solo title. At which point they’re more accurately termed ‘abyssmal.’

I mean….I definitely think the original Titans Hunt storyline is worth a read, and contains so much of what’s quintessential to his character and his dynamics with practically every single individual member of the New Teen Titans lineup. (And to be clear, this is the Titans Hunt storyline from the late 80s, not the crap Rebirth story with the same name. I don’t know her.)

In terms of the Batbooks themselves….y’know, it might sound weird given that I really hate the event-driven structure of comics in this day and age and think it actively works against the creative potential of the various books…..BUT….the way they used to do more localized ‘events/crossovers’ between every book in individual franchises…..in hindsight, a lot of those worked pretty well, especially when you’re reading them all after the fact and all the related issues are conveniently collected, as opposed to how at the time it was a massive pain in the ass to try and keep track of what titles the storyline was going to be continuing in next week, etc.

But so, like…a lot of the big Batbooks events from back then are worth a read and hold up well, I think, because in events like No Man’s Land, War Games, etc…there was a lot more effort put into coordinating the various writers and getting them ALL on the same page and making those crossovers a lot more actual collaboration than what we tend to see in the big line-wide events nowadays. So a lot of those are pretty great because they’d bring all the assorted Bat franchise characters together for the duration of a specific story, even ones who tended to usually just be at the fringes of the family or only interact with certain others once in a blue moon. The all hands on deck kinda thing.

If you haven’t already read the full scope of Knightfall, specifically when Dick first took up the Batman mantle while Bruce was recovering from Bane breaking his back, and with Tim as his Robin then, I would definitely check that out. Its angsty as hell but still really good.

Hmm, what else. Ugh, see, like…..if there were a way to JUST isolate Dick and Cassandra’s parts of the ‘Bruce Wayne: Murderer?’ and the ‘Bruce Wayne: Fugitive’ story arcs, I would say read those, lol, because like…..the two of them were sooooo good there, those arcs had some of the best Dick and Cass and they really got closer during that time, mostly due to the fact that everyone else, even Tim and Babs, were trying to stay impartial and follow the evidence wherever it led, even though it was implicating Bruce at the time…..but Dick and Cass were just like “Nope, doesn’t matter. I don’t care. The evidence is lying. Bruce is innocent la la la I can’t hear you.”

I’m just….the two of them in particular fought SO DAMN HARD for their dad in that story (even if Bruce hadn’t started talking about adopting Cass yet by that point. WHATEVER. I’M STILL COUNTING IT). Its honestly pretty fucking beautiful in how their character beats played out specifically, and there was just so much poignancy to their increasingly desperate attempts to think outside the box for ways to prove it couldn’t have been Bruce, even while acknowledging that doing so went against every single thing he’d ever taught them himself…..

Buuuuuuut, the downside of those two story arcs is that BECAUSE of how freaking devoted Dick and Cass are to proving Bruce’s innocence and bringing him home…..if you’re anything like me, Bruce’s train of thought and actions throughout almost those entire two story arcs all the way up until just before the end….like….will have you wanting to reach into the actual pages of the comic book so you can wrap your hands around B’s scrawny two-dimensional neck and just. Be like. WHAT ARE YOU DOOOOOOING?

And I mean, to be fair, its not that he’s particularly out of character or that its hard to see how and why they decided on that approach to him in that story. Tbh, I get their reasoning for the character choices they made with Bruce there, it makes sense, its not terrible character logic, its just…..painful to read. Especially given that the BW:M and BW:F arcs are loooooooooooooong. And spread across like. So many issues, in all the various Bat titles of the time. And you’re just like omg can you please hurry it up to the part where Bruce figures out he can’t do this alone and shouldn’t do this alone and his family is literally yelling LET US HELP YOU and…he goes and lets them help him?

So. Yeah. Lots of double-edged swords in all of that. Hopefully somewhere in all that stream of consciousness you can pick out a few starting points to start like….scoping out to see if they might be what you’re looking for. LOL.

Oh! And per your other question, the one-shot that details the juvie origin is Robin Annual #3 I believe. And if its not that, then its Robin Annual: Year Three. Its one of those two. I just don’t even pretend to remember how they went about numbering those flashback mini’s and one-shots, if I ever actually understood their logic there at all.

*Shrugs* Why is the story about Dick’s first major crisis in costume called Robin: Year One while the story about what happened to Dick before he even ended up at Wayne Manor is in a book called Robin Annual: Year Three? I haven’t the foggiest clue, lol.

Sometimes the only reasonable explanation is that DC’s just fucking weird, I guess. lmao

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