#in comparison with others' exhausted faces
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unhonestlymirror · 1 year ago
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chloecherrysip · 1 year ago
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Mario watching his and Luigi's commercial in Punch-Out Pizzeria
#mario movie#mario movie spoilers#mario and luigi#super mario bros#super mario bros movie#super mario bros movie spoilers#cherrysip edits#if you got notifications about gifs from this set yesterday shhhhhhh i was having PROBLEMS#anyway i'm currently working on a gifset for the whole scene of mario getting back up in the pizzeria but then I HAD THIS IDEA#and i was like 'wow that sounds like a comparison that's going to cause me emotional pain' and i was right it absolutely did :) :) :)#[gesturing wildly to gifs while tears stream down my face] U DON'T UNDERSTAND MARIO IS IN THE EXACT SAME PLACE BOTH TIMES#the first time he's nervous but also SO excited and happy about what the future is gonna bring and seeing this commercial is#the culmination of everything he and luigi have been striving for and they're holding each other tight and the world feels wide open#and the second time everything is different. mario has been beaten down. he is terrified and aching and exhausted and convinced#that everyone has been right about him. he's a joke. he's a failure. the only thing he's ever done for his brother is drag him down.#but then he sees the commercial and everything comes back. the joy and the excitement and him and luigi against the world#the only difference is that he doesn't have his brother next to him and that's everything. mario doesn't feel whole otherwise#mario always does his best but when he and luigi are together working in sync he truly feels like anything is possible#and now his brother is out there somewhere in the chaos and bowser isn't gonna stop. he's gotta get up again. he does get up again.#IT'S A LOT BASICALLY. IT'S A WHOLE LOT AND I LOVE THEM DEARLY
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loumauve · 1 year ago
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#running face first straight into every single rejection sensitive wall atm and it's so frustrating#like. can we just not do this rn brain? I'm too tired to deal with this on top of everything else#all it does is make me alienate myself from people I care about and make me feel like shit afterwards#and it doesn't fix any of the underlying issues either. (like. I've been upset about ppl not doing what I do)#(as in read all of my fic like I try to read all my friends' fic usually. but like.. not everyone can and not everyone wants to)#(but it's one of those irrational things of 'if they cared about me wouldn't they also try' even tho that's not a fair ask)#(and like.. most people don't read random fic for fandoms they're not even in so this is entirely stupid to be upset about)#(but here we are anyway)#just.. me. raw to the very nerve and too tired to fix anything that might help alleviate it#I just want to feel normal again. and like I have control over my emotional state#but between 'dude fucked up bc of his borderline being triggered by grief and letting out all his frustrations on me for weeks'#and 'other dude grieving but not processing and not even taking a break to figure out where he's at emotionally..#..therefore dropping all of his unprocessed baggage and his part of the group work right on top of me' I'm just having a heck of a month#and idk. it would have been nice to talk to sb about my fic even if it's older now and not the best perhaps#(doesn't help when everybody you know writes really great fic and you're just outside the door scribbling some ideas into the sand)#idk. usually I do better in disconnecting self-worth and accomplishments and stop myself before the comparisons with others start#but rn it's all too much and I'm drained and exhausted and nothing feels good or helps much at all.#anyway.#it is what is I guess. and what it is is fucked and I doubt it's gonna change anytime soon.#that's not me being unrealistic or depression talking. it's based on how things have progressed thus far#there's another year and a half of this kind of stress which will likely get worse when our group grows from 18 to 31 in October#and then I'd have to start working proper again which I haven't in over two years bc of all the rehabilitation I've been going through#and it's terrifying and I'm already exhausted and worn down and worn out and I just don't know how normal is ever gonna be my life again
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celestiamour · 3 months ago
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‧₊˚✧ ❛[ pretty tipsy ]❜
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ft. logan howlett x f! reader — xmen, marvel
╰₊✧ he brings you home after a night out drinking┊2.5k words
setting: deadpool & wolverine (2024) worst! logan contains: alcohol & intoxication, this man is WHIPPED, age & size difference, emotional drunk human reader, ooc? calling him kitty
➤ author's note: idk what this is but it’s my longest logan piece yet because i have yet to write any more than a thousand words for him
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tonight was one of the few nights logan could finally have some alone time. wade was going out for drinks with vanessa with the plan to stay over at her place, the ever so mysterious blind al was off doing her own thing, and mary puppins was resting peacefully in her little bed, tuckered out after a long day of playtime. he could finally get some long-awaited peace and quiet, a moment to himself to relax and breathe. while he’s grateful for the presence of others since he arrived in this dimension, he’s still a lone wolf at heart who treasures his privacy above all else.
humming a little tune from the eighties, he sunk into the beat-up leather couch with a beer in one hand and a lit cigar in the other, taking a long drag on it and preparing himself for a relaxing evening until his flip phone started ringing. when he opened it up to read the “wade wilson” contact name staring back at him, he rolled his eyes with a groan before answering.
“what the fuck do you want?”
“not even a ‘hello?’ damn bitch, okay then— well, we ran into some friends and had some drinks together, but one of them is pretty shit-faced right now and her phone is dead, could you pretty please with sugar on top come and pick her up?”
“the fuck? that’s not my problem, just call her an uber—” he stopped mid-sentence when he heard a familiar giggle in the background, one asking a different partygoer to have another drink with her, “is that the neighbor who lives at the end of the hallway?”
“yeah, it’s your little crush~! you recognize her from just her voice over the phone, oh my god, you have it bad wolfie!! well, if you don’t wanna come, then fine, whatever, but you know, it’s not unsafe for a pretty lady to be alone this late at night! some guy might just swoop her up, actually, there’s some guy asking for her number right now—”
“alright, alright, i’m coming! send me the address.” he nearly shouted into the receiver, putting out his cigar on the ashtray atop the coffee table and slipping on his jacket to leave the comfort of his shared apartment.
the night was chilly in comparison to the cozy warmth of the indoors and the bar was filled with loud chattering and cheers, the clinking of glasses, yelling at the game being televised, and the general buzz of extroverted fun on a weekend night. 
“ayyy, there he is! come here, peanut, sit, sit, sit, have a drink with us!”
logan hesitated, not because he would ever shy away from free booze but because he was here on a mission with one sole goal in mind (and because he wasn’t familiar with this particular group of people, he didn’t feel like socializing tonight) “no, it’s fine, i’m just here to take her home.” his voice was uncharacteristically mellow, finding you napping on the table with your arms folded to be a makeshift cushion for your head. 
you peeked at the man coming up next to you and your face changed from exhausted to ecstatic to upset in the span of a few seconds, “looggann!! how are you doing, i feel like i haven’t seen you in foreverr— how come every time i see you in the hall, you always run off, are you avoiding me? did i do something wrong?” you cling onto his hand and shake his arm, paying no attention to your friends giggling at your behavior in the background, pouting and tearing up. 
oh god, you’re an emotional drunk, that’s so cute. neither he nor wade could get drunk at all on account of their systems constantly cleaning out the effects of the alcohol as soon as it’s consumed, but when he drinks around others, it’s a trait he typically finds so annoying quickly becoming so endearing when worn by you.
“i’m not avoiding you, you haven’t done anything wrong,” he consoled in the most gentle voice a wolverine could muster, also cringing at the fact that he wasn’t half as discreet as he thought he was. it’s true, he has been avoiding you, but only because he couldn’t stand the way you made him feel, smoothing out the rough edges of his personality and making him feel stupid butterflies he was far too old to be feeling, not to mention the nonstop teasing from everyone else when they noticed the way he seemed to look at you from afar. it was as if he was a child who thought hiding from it would make it go away, but it has become apparent it has only grown stronger.
“you’re telling the truth?” you sniffled.
“yes, i am. come on, bub, let’s get you outta here. i’m here to take you home.”
you didn’t protest or try to convince him you weren’t wasted, knowing your limit had been reached, and slowly picked up your things to follow him out of the building. he allowed you to intertwine your arm with his, providing support to your unbalanced mind and stumbling legs since you couldn’t even walk straight.
“why would you drink so much if you’re such a lightweight?”
“how do you know i’m a lightweight? you weren’t there, i could have drunk an entire bathtub full of booze before you showed up!” 
“nah, i can smell it, there’s no way you drank anything more than a few pints.”
“oh, so the kitty is a dog now? i thought you were more cat-like this whole time, but i guess i was wrong.” 
“what?” they say what a person says when intoxicated comes from their soul and true thoughts with little to no filter, but he certainly wasn’t anticipating those words to come out of your mouth.
“you look like a kitty, you know? with the way your hair does the little swoopy things— do you wake up like that or do you need to style it? you act like one too, grumpy ass kitty.”
“don’t call me that, kid, i hear it enough from wade already.”
“i’ll stop calling you kitty when you stop calling me kid! i know you’re old as hell, but i’m a grown-ass adult!”
“yeah? well, you’re certainly not acting like one right now.”
you were silent for a minute, making him worry for a second that he offended you by calling you childish, but when he looked back down at you, you were simply staring in astonishment. “i’ve never seen you smile before! you look a lot more handsome, you should do it more often!”
was he smiling? he didn’t even notice, grinning ear to ear and revealing his pearly white teeth, chuckling at your ridiculous words. was this really the first time you saw him smile and heard him laugh? no wonder you assumed he was avoiding you, he was surprised you didn’t hate him just because of a misunderstanding.
it took some time to get you up all of the stairs to your floor without tripping, and logan was almost sad the night was over so quickly. even if the conversation was mostly one-sided and you were intoxicated with slurred words, he swears he listened to all you had to say between comedic bits, insightful knowledge, random bullshit, and found it all fascinating. luckily for him, his time with you wasn’t up yet as he watched you fumble with your purse and frown.
“oh, fuck… i lost my keys… oh no…” you slumped against the wall until you fell to the floor, feeling yourself starting to cry at this inconvenience with heightened emotions. 
“god, please don’t, not again…” he’s the absolute worst at comforting others, it isn’t his strong suit, and acknowledging this weakness seemed ten times more difficult when you were the one in need. “come on, you can sleep at my place for the night and charge your phone.”
“...really?”
“yes, come on.” 
you took his outreached hand and found yourself in his grasp again as he held onto your shoulder to steady you, unlocking the door and leading you into his shared apartment. he felt somewhat grateful that you were too drunk to notice how messy the site was, seating you on the couch as he got you a glass of water to sober up. you looked so out of place among it all, so young and feminine with your vibrant club clothing around all of the aging, scratched-up furniture and muted colors.
“thank you,” you murmur, downing the entire tall glass with a few gulps, “uh, where is the bathroom?” he directed you to where it was and allowed you to use it, quickly hearing you turn on the shower after a minute and just as quickly hearing you swearing in regret over the loud pitter-patter of the steaming hot water. “i’m never drinking again, why am i being so fucking stupid?!” 
“are you okay?” 
“yeah, except for the fact i forgot that i don’t have a change of clothes and i stepped into the shower with my current ones on because i forgot to take them off!” your voice cracked, feeling yourself starting to cry once again from yet another inconvenience. you were really just embarrassing yourself and couldn’t wait for this shitty day to be over.
he let out a sigh of relief, “god, don’t scare me like that— i’ll get you something, hold on, please don’t cry.” he could have stolen some of al’s clothing since she wouldn’t have noticed, or he could have stolen some of the clothes vanessa left behind after spending time with wade, but for some odd reason, he pulled out one of his canadian hockey jerseys for you. the fabric was soft and worn with time, smelling slightly of him and laundry detergent, and arguably the most comfortable thing he had at his disposal. “i’ll leave it outside the door, okay?”
“thank youu!!” (and thank god your underwear is still clean and dry enough to wear again, you have no idea what you would have done if you didn’t realize your mistake soon enough and stood under the water for long enough to be soaked to the bone.)
logan allowed his fatigued body to rest for a moment, sinking into the couch just as he did an hour ago in hopes of relaxation. what the fuck was he doing? since when did the wolverine play babysitter for drunk young women, walking them back to play guard dog against possible creepy men, letting them into his home, and lending them his clothing to wear? this was so uncharacteristic of him, he couldn’t think of a single person he was willing to do this for other than laura, but you certainly weren’t nearly as close to him as he was to her! lord, he’s so pathetic, he thinks he probably would have carried you back bridal style too if you asked him.
the water stopped and he waited for you to exit so that he could show you where you could sleep, but he could now see he didn’t need to. your apartment layouts are nearly identical, and it looks like your brain was switched onto autopilot after cleaning up, mindlessly strolling into his bedroom and plopping down on his mattress as if it were your own. (his shirt was practically a dress on you, falling to your mid-thigh and ill-fitted on your smaller frame, his eyes lingering on it for a second longer than what would have been polite.)
he leaned against the doorframe, watching you make yourself comfortable and preparing to stay there until the early afternoon with a banging headache. “are you comfortable? do you need anything else?”
you murmured something in response and stretched out your arms, making grabby hands and inviting him to join you, “come cuddle with me! herree, kitty, kitty, kitty~”
are you really calling a fifty-something-year-old, six-foot-tall killer mutant with adamantium bones and razor-sharp claws that come out of his knuckles ‘kitty’? yes, yes you are, and you’re going to scream into your pillow from embarrassment when you recall it the next day.
“i don’t do cuddles, princess,” he chuckled even though he intended to scoff. “and i already told you to quit calling me that.”
“pleaseee? pretty pleasee?” you chirped, eyes going big and round just like a puppy in a cartoon, begging him to humor you in this request.
are you truly a human, or are you secretly a mutant who has hypnotic powers? the answer is obvious, he’s just an old loser who apparently answers at your every beck and call now because all he could do is sigh, slip off his jacket, and get under the blanket with you. 
you rolled on your side and wrapped your arm around his body, nuzzling your face into his comforting touch and inhaling the mild scent of pine and tobacco. humming a satisfied “good night” and dozing off within a few minutes, you clung to him as tightly as a koala onto a branch, and he couldn’t separate himself from you without making you stir and whine. 
trapped in the embrace of a beautiful neighbor whom he possessed a soft spot for, wearing his clothing and laying in his bed, he would be trapped like this until morning it sounds like a dream to most men, but to logan, it’s the fear of getting attached and losing someone else important to him rearing its ugly head to the forefront of his mind. it scares him to think what could happen if he allowed himself this pleasure of becoming close to you, and yet when he admires your slumbering face, he feels like it would be okay and work itself out in the end somehow.
he fell asleep more quickly than usual when you held him, and for the first time in forever, he wasn’t tormented with horrid nightmares of the past that always plagued him before now. when he woke up, his weary soul was well-rested and energized, almost as if he was twenty years younger again. the wonders of a good night’s sleep, or perhaps, the wonders of being with you. 
it felt so… natural to wake up with you next to him.
you were practically a dead weight by now, not rousing in the least when he slowly got up to leave the bed. he did feel a little back about undoing the grasp you had on him though, felt a bit like abandoning you in a vulnerable state. he sauntered into the kitchen to brew a cup of coffee as per his routine, only to find the most annoyingly loveable scarred face sitting in a chair waiting for him, legs crossed and hands in his lap like a supervillain. 
“sooooo, how was your night, you smitten kitten? you dirty dog!” there was a stupid smirk on his face, trying his best to hold back a fit of giggles. he knows nothing suggestive happened and was just teasing, but he still wanted to hear him say that it was a wonderful night nonetheless and to thank him for playing matchmaker.
“shut the fuck up before i stab you again. don’t ruin this morning for me.”
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blaire-apricity · 4 months ago
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Grief
ʟᴀᴅs ʙᴏʏs x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ
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ᯓ❅ ┆ 𝘴𝘺𝘯𝘰𝘱𝘴𝘪𝘴 ┆ : 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘓𝘈𝘋𝘚 𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴?
ᯓ❅ ┆ 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘴 ┆ : 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘵, 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘴𝘵, & 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘖𝘖𝘊
─────────────── ˗ˏˋ ❅。˚ ☁︎ ˚。⋆。˚☽ ˎˊ˗ ────────────────
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𝐗𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐫
Xavier is unraveling. He refuses to accept the brutal reality of your absence, his mind rejecting the notion that you’re gone. Every day he clings to the desperate hope of finding you, even if it means chasing an illusion. Jeremiah pleads with him to let go, to find rest, but Xavier hasn’t slept a single night since you disappeared. The world insists you’re gone forever, but he can’t believe that. Somewhere, he convinces himself, you must still exist. He’s willing to turn the world upside down to see you again, despite the gnawing certainty deep inside him that you’re lost to him forever. He will never stop, not until his body collapses from exhaustion. Losing you once was unbearable; he won’t let it happen again, no matter the cost.
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𝐙𝐚𝐲𝐧𝐞
Zayne appears composed, his emotions meticulously controlled, his expression unchanged. But the mere mention of your name sends ripples through his calm facade. When alone in his office, the dam breaks. Tears fall freely as memories of your smile flood his mind, shattering his composure. Your disappearance haunts him, and he blames himself for not protecting you, for not being there when you needed him. It takes years for him to begin moving on, and even then, the wound never truly heals. He will always carry the pain of losing the one person who mattered most to him, a scar that time can never erase.
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𝐑𝐚𝐟𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐥
Rafayel descends into despair, his mind a tangled mess, his heart shattered beyond repair. The thought of you forgetting him pales in comparison to the agony of losing you completely. He was content just being near you, even if you couldn’t remember. Now, faced with a life without you, he breaks down, collapsing to the ground as sobs wrack his body. He retreats from the world, locking himself away in his studio, which becomes a prison of his own making. What good is anything if it’s only half? That’s how his heart feels—torn without you, the other half of his soul.
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𝐒𝐲𝐥𝐮𝐬
Sylus explodes with rage. Always the controlled one, he now finds himself consumed by a fury he can’t contain. You were his unexpected source of gentleness and warmth, and now you’re gone, ripped away from him. The news of your disappearance drives him to violent outbursts. He flips tables, shatters glass, and destroys furniture, his shouts of frustration echoing through the mansion. Luke and Kieran keep their distance, knowing better than to approach him in this state. The loss of you makes him question everything. What’s the point of keeping the peace, of holding back? If he’s lost his world, he might as well set fire to the entire world in his grief and anger.
·❆   ❆ ❅    •    .     ❆❆•  · .   ❅
𝐴𝑢𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑟'𝑠 𝑁𝑜𝑡𝑒: 𝑊ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑠𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑚𝑦 𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑎-𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟 𝑡𝑜 𝑠𝑘𝑖𝑚 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑐ℎ𝑒𝑐𝑘 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑙 𝑒𝑟𝑟𝑜𝑟𝑠, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑖𝑟𝑠𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑠𝑎𝑦 𝑤𝑎𝑠; "𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑡𝑒𝑙𝑙 𝑦𝑜𝑢'𝑣𝑒 𝑝𝑢𝑡 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑡 𝑜𝑛 𝑒𝑓𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑋𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑆𝑦𝑙𝑢𝑠." 𝐼𝑇 𝑊𝐴𝑆𝑁'𝑇 𝐸𝑉𝐸𝑁 𝐼𝑁𝑇𝐸𝑁𝑇𝐼𝑂𝑁𝐴𝐿, 𝐼 𝑆𝑊𝐸𝐴𝑅 𝐴𝑆𝐾𝐷𝐻𝐾𝐴𝑆.
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ozzgin · 11 months ago
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Yandere! Yakuza x Reader (III)
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A whole lot of confusion as to whether Reader and her yakuza friend are actually dating. After much back and forth and a coworker being threatened, the awaited confession might finally take place.
Bonus part: Kazuya tells Reader about his and Daitou's past and how they ended up working for the yakuza.
Content: female reader, obsessive behavior, violence
Tags: @vinivave @ansy-tea @evvie8 @angelicbunnee @jingerbreadoutofstock @azukoya @randomlyblues @alien-consummation @neverlandlostchild @mimiemie @toji-whore @cloudie-skay @lilkittenmitten
[Part 2] | [Part 4] | [Yakuza Masterlist]
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The items are scanned and Kazuya finishes paying. He looks back, searching for Daitou, and finds him wandering among the narrow aisles of magazines and manga. They'd stopped by the konbini at the train station after their job.
"Here's your bentou." The blonde man extends a small box, eyeing his friend suspiciously. "Say, do you have an upset stomach or something? You're uglier than usual." 
Daitou thanks him with a nod, but doesn't take the neatly packaged food. He's idly playing with the cover of a romance volume, bending and straightening its corner.
"Nah, nothing like that. Just, ya know, feels a bit like (Y/N)'s been avoiding me. She hurries straight home after work and barely waves hi. I thought we'd do more things together now that we're dating."
Kazuya nearly spits out the soda he opened while listening to Daitou's troubles. He snorts and quickly wipes his mouth. 
"Wait, are you serious? You actually asked her out? And she said yes??"
Daitou thinks back to the time he gifted you your stalker's finger and teeth, the way you defended him, and the way you quietly walked home and almost held hands. That pretty much made it official, didn't it? So he confidently nods to his utterly baffled partner in crime.
"You little rascal, you! Who would've thought you had it in you?!" He cheerfully slaps Daitou's back and wraps his arm around his neck. The dark haired man blushes and scratches his cheek awkwardly. "You should've told me earlier!"
True. Between the two of them, Kazuya has always been extremely charismatic and popular with women. His perfectly combed blonde hair, his sparkling designer suits, his luxuriously elegant cologne. The handsome features and assertive smile. More than once he'd been approached by modeling agencies, and he likes to joke his lust for violence stopped him from living the glamorous life. In comparison, Daitou has the opposite effect on people. The room will empty if he steps inside. He's unnervingly tall, with bulging muscles, has multiple scars crossing his face, and his prosthetic eye always ends up twisted in the strangest position, causing him to look like he's only missing the straight jacket. Everyone is shocked upon hearing about their friendship. 
So it makes sense that Kazuya would have the required experience to offer him decent advice when it comes to (Y/N).
"Listen here, if there's one thing you should know, it's that women like a guy that fights for them. You gotta show them you care. What can you offer that other guys can't?"
The tall man listens intently, with a concentrated frown as if taking mental notes. He's not entirely sure who he should fight in this ordeal, but he doesn't want to embarrass himself in front of Kazuya, so he nods vehemently to his words.
"That's the short preview. If you have any more questions, just come over later. I'm piss tired, so I'll go home and have the nap of a lifetime." He yawns deeply to showcase his exhaustion and slowly walks away, throwing his hand in a lazy wave. 
The yakuza remains standing, still ruminating over the words of wisdom generously offered by the expert himself. Is he to randomly beat up people on the street as you watch? Won't Boss be angry if he attacks civilians? He gasps in realization. Perhaps this is what Kazuya meant. What kind of man is he if he can't even go against his Boss? So what if Boss won't like it? He has to prove himself to you. 
With newfound determination, he clenches his fists and gazes out of the window. 
That's when he notices you. You seem to be returning from work. Even more - and this causes his jaw to tighten in anger - some unknown man is walking next to you, cheerfully chitchatting and gesturing. 
That settles it. 
"You really didn't have to walk me home." You laugh clumsily to the man at your side.
A new coworker recently joined your company, and you've been asked to show him the ropes. You gradually discovered you had quite a lot in common, throughout your ample opportunities to gossip and talk leisurely. Your schedule isn't as packed nowadays, given you'll show up earlier and leave later.
Normally you'd prefer to be in your warm bed as soon as possible, but you've been feeling rather tense since the incident with Daitou. During his heated exchange with Kazuya, you've heard mentions of 'being liked by women' and 'having a crush on someone'. You thought it involved you and you nervously awaited further explanations from Daitou himself, but on the way back he was completely silent. You didn't have the courage to bring it up, so you assumed there must've been a misunderstanding somewhere along the way. 
Which, after all, would make plenty of sense. What business would a yakuza have with you? He's already shown much more courtesy than it was required of him. Hoping he'd also confess his feelings on top of everything was downright ridiculous and you're embarrassed to admit you'd harbored such cheesy fantasies to begin with. 
"Don't sweat it. You might not know", the coworker warns with lowered voice, "but this area is reeking of gangsters. I'm surprised you've been fine so far, but you should be more careful."
"O-oh...I see..." You glance at him and hold back a smirk. You doubt he could protect you from Daitou or Kazuya, but you appreciate his chivalry nonetheless. 
There's an uncomfortable pause as you stand in your doorframe, having reached the intended destination. The man hasn't left yet, waiting expectantly. He lowers his head towards yours and you swiftly slam the door, muttering something about an emergency. 
"Cute." He thinks to himself as he chuckles and steps away.
There's always a next time.
The coworker heads towards the train station in a relaxed strut. At the first intersection, however, he feels his clothes being pulled and he finds himself abruptly shoved in an empty room by an unknown assailant. 
Daitou easily lifts him up by his collar and nonchalantly throws him in a chair. It seems to be a small storage unit, possibly belonging to one of the shops. 
"What's your business with (Y/N)?" He barks.
"Huh? I should be the one asking-" The man pauses for a second, going over his conversations with you. "Could it be that you're the stalker she mentioned?"
Naturally, you had left out the part where your stalker was carefully packaged and dumped in a place unknown. To your coworker, he was very much still alive and a potential threat.
The yakuza is taken aback. 
"I'm her boyfriend!" He retorts angrily. 
"Bullshit. She doesn't have a boyfriend."
Another slap to the face. Daitou's cheeks are becoming increasingly red and he runs his fingers through his hair, attempting to calm down. Why, this son of a...
He marches to one of the metal shelves behind, grabbing his tool belt. Simultaneously, the door opens and Kazuya sheepishly peeks his head in. His blonde locks are ruffled and one can tell he's freshly woken up. 
"Yo, I just realized I might've been too metaphorical with you back at the store so I've been texting you, but you didn't-...Wait, why is there a guy handcuffed to the chair?"
He crosses his arms, with a habitual scolding glare towards his friend. 
"I just caught this cockroach flirting with (Y/N)! Went all the way to her place!" Daitou whines, his face full of indignation.
"Of course you know where she lives, you fucking stalker." The coworker exclaims bitterly. 
"Watch your mouth buddy, he ain't no stalker!" Kazuya straightens his back and approaches the mysterious man. "If he's right, and you've been messing with his woman...We ain't letting that go. Today you learn why no one fucks with the yakuza." 
The two men exchange a knowing look.
You drop yourself on the sofa and groan. Tomorrow will certainly be strange. Was the coworker trying to kiss you just now? You'll have to think of a polite way to turn him down next shift. Is it because you're not interested, or because you're still hoping to have a chance with Daitou? You slap your cheeks vigorously, trying to pull yourself out of such thoughts. 
You suddenly notice the foreign wallet sticking out of your bag. Your  coworker had dropped it earlier today while running for the train, and you offered to throw it in your bag to save time. Except you forgot to return it.
You check your phone. It hasn't been that long, so maybe you can still reach him if you hurry. Without much contemplation, you pluck the wallet and sprint out.
As you dash past the buildings, you have the idea of calling the man and asking him to wait instead. Why run like a madman? You stop and rest a hand against the wall, trying to catch your breath. Ugh, you've been so scattered today. This should've been the obvious choice, instead you sprang out. Silly. 
From around the corner you can make out the familiar wails you've learned to ignore. Whoever the yakuza tortures is not your problem. You are about to scurry away, yet something about these whimpers feels odd. No...Could it be?
You tiptoe down the vacant alleyway and try to catch a glimpse inside through the small, dirty window. As a matter of fact, it is your beloved coworker. Kazuya is holding his arm against a table, with the fingers forcefully fanned out, and Daitou has a blade secured over the pinky finger. 
You elbow yourself against the door in a theatrical entry. 
"What the hell are you guys doing?! That's my coworker!" You yell.
Daitou freezes, and Kazuya instantly releases his grasp. They turn to you, shocked.
"Stay out of it, (Y/N), this is to be settled among men. This bastard insulted your boyfriend, we can't let it slide!" Kazuya regains his composure and defends his cause fervently, pointing to the man that's now sobbing and crying uncontrollably. 
"Boyfriend?" You question, mouth agape. 
The blonde man stares at you. 
"You're...You're dating, aren't you?"
"Since when?" You demand, confused and upset.
Both you and Kazuya turn to Daitou for answers.
"I'm going to ask you one more time. Did you actually ask her out, Daitou? Did you say it out loud?" Kazuya's voice breaks in exasperation.
"W-well, I didn't...I didn't say it, but I thought..." the man's eyes dart between you and his friend. He gulps. "W-we almost held hands, didn't we?"
Overwhelmed with anger, the blonde stomps over to the shelves and kicks one to make his point, loudly bemoaning his friend's lack of social awareness. He can't believe he went along with his nonsense. Him, of all people! He should've anticipated it. 
As the coworker weeps and Kazuya continues his foul monologue, you can't help the blush that's now burning across your face. You fidget anxiously next to the tattooed man.
"Y-you thought we were dating?"
"Sorry for not making it clear." Daitou is once again twiddling with his prosthetic eye, dejected. "Is it too late to ask you out now? Because I do like you a lot..."
"Since you put it so nicely...I can't really say no~" Your ears are bright red and you're twirling your hair. Is it truly happening? Are you dreaming? Everything feels snug and fuzzy and the butterflies are swarming your stomach. 
You don't have time to enjoy your romantic encounter, as Kazuya is now behind you, clearing his throat.
"Alright, you lovebirds, what about this one here, then?" 
You suddenly remember your coworker and an icy cold flashes through your body. 
"Oh God, how will I explain this at work? I'll get fired!" You bite your nails in terror. You can already visualize the slip of unemployment. The long lines at the Job Center, you and the homeless. Panic begins to build up. 
Until Daitou's large hands rest on your shoulders. He's unexpectedly warm. 
"Don't worry about it, (Y/N). I'll have a word with Boss, and we can get you a job here. This way we can spend more time together", he suggests with childish enthusiasm. 
You glance up at him, moved by his soothing words.
"I wouldn't want to bother you like that."
"Hey, it's my fault you ended up in this situation. You can leave everything to me." He reassures you proudly.
"That didn't answer my damn question." Kazuya points out, annoyed.
"Can't we just kill him or something? He did call me a stalker, and I'm still upset about that..."
Daitou stretches and sighs in boredom, pondering the options. Once he's decided on the outcome, he shoos you away lovingly. You don't need to see this part. 
Bonus: Daitou's backstory 
"Oh, right, how did it go with your tickets?"
Kazuya is walking beside you, hands in pockets. Every now and then he removes the cigarette from his mouth to tap away the piling ash.
"Well, I still have both kidneys, but I won't be swimming in cash for the next months at least." You respond, slouching your shoulders dramatically for the effect. 
"Flying abroad is always expensive. Unless, I don't know, you book years in advance."
"Yeah. I should've looked earlier, but I wasn't sure about my work schedule. At least I get to see my family and friends for Christmas." 
After a few more steps in silence, you glance up at the blonde man. He notices your curious stare and raises his eyebrows, as if encouraging you to speak up. 
"What about you? Will you be going home for the holidays?"
He grins at your question and proudly places a hand on his chest.
"This is my home, actually! I was born and raised in this very neighborhood."
"Really? Was it not a yakuza quarter before?" Your eyes widen at his statement. 
"It was." Kazuya blows some of his smoke in your direction and you cough lightly. "You know the soapland further down the street?"
You nod.
"Mom used to work there. One of the clients got her pregnant and she found out too late. She had a room upstairs, and I just kind of tagged along. The other girls looked after me, too."
You recall one instance when Kazuya received a phone call about some drunkard causing a ruckus at the brothel, and he shot up without a word, rushed out and returned with bloodied knuckles. At the time, you'd assumed he's a client himself and maybe got attached to one of the girls. Now it makes sense. You're a little embarrassed of your obvious prejudice. If he grew up there, it must be his way of showing gratitude to the workers who loved him despite the circumstances. 
"Oh, what about Daitou, then? Is he from the area, too?"
The man frowns and purses his lips thoughtfully. After a moment, his features soften up again and he sighs.
"I suppose you're his girlfriend, after all. It's also not a secret per se..."
Your ears perk up at the strange reaction to your inquiry. 
"I mean, it's just a bit of a grim topic. No one knows for sure. Boss found him on the streets years ago, when he was a wee kid." 
He presses his thumb and index finger together, emphasizing the small size to you. 
"I don't know all the details, just what the Seniors told me - I was a kid myself back then - but it was pretty bad. Had no shoes on, scratches and cuts all over. His left eye was swollen and terribly infected, that's how he lost it, actually. Boss felt sorry for him, so he took him in.
They did try to ask him for parents or relatives, but apparently he wouldn't speak at all. Took him like a year to finally open his mouth. Even now, if you ask him anything about his past, he just pretends he didn't hear you. So maybe don't bring it up to him."
You shake your head along, urging him to continue with more details. Kazuya seems to warm up to the memories and slows down, indulging in the recollection. 
"Anyways, one day Boss' car is followed and he gets shot in the shoulder. Some snot-nosed trainees from the rival gang. They hadn't even gotten their pins yet, wanted to impress their older brothers I guess.
Daitou heard about it and went after them. One of our Seniors - he's a tough guy alright, been with the Family for decades - he told me he was sweating like mad when they found him. Daitou was just a teen at the time, but he butchered those guys up so bad they couldn't tell them apart anymore. Even bit a few bullets, and still kept going, like a crazed animal. The adults were freaking out. They didn't expect him to be this strong.
I suspect they were pretty afraid of him, you know? They were probably thinking, "if one day he has it out for us, we're done for!", so they told Boss they should kick him out. But at this point Daitou was like his own son, so he laughed and said, "What's the matter with ya, he does your dirty work and you wanna get rid of him?! If the boy wants to fight, let him!", and he arranged for Daitou to join the Family officially. I was recruited around the same time.
We didn't get along at first, I mean, they warned me to stay away because he's crazy and also Boss' favorite. He didn't hang out with anyone. He had his own jobs, the mercenary stuff no one else wanted to deal with.
You might not believe it, but back then I was an angry, stubborn asshole. It didn't sit well with me that this guy was out there, doing his own thing. I had a reputation myself, before I dropped out of high school I was pretty much undefeated. I thought I'd see it with my own eyes, this all-powerful jackass even the Seniors avoided."
You smile faintly, trying to imagine a young Kazuya without the expensive, flashy suit and polished appearance.
"So one evening I just walked up to him and told him to join me outside. Didn't even give him a speech, just rammed my fist into his face. This was my signature move, you know, I can't even count how many guys I knocked out with this punch. Straight into the jaw, sends your brain spinning. Whew, and this guy? He didn't even flinch! Just stood there and looked at me like I was dumb. I was pissed off at this point, you can imagine, it felt like he was mocking me. So I yelled we ain't done until one of us gives up. 
He understood what I wanted and finally fought me earnestly. Hell, he even knocked some of my teeth out. This one here's an implant. Mad expensive. Anyhow, as much as it hurt my pride, I'd lost fair and square. So I got up, wiped the blood, and asked him to come grab a drink with me. My treat. 
You should've seen his face, (Y/N). I think it was the first time I've witnessed him smile. 'Really? Can I? Are you sure?' He was like a stray dog after you've thrown him some leftovers. Kept that dumb grin the whole night. You could've given him a clown hat and people would've paid to see the circus. 
That's when I realized this poor bastard probably just wanted a friend. The next day I went to pick him up again and he was beaming like a princess. Heh. Afterwards he started following me around and eventually Boss called me in. I thought I got into trouble or something, even brought a bunch of gauze pads in case I needed to slice off my finger. Turns out he'd heard of us becoming pals, and he asked me to maybe attend Daitou every now and then because he always leaves a mess and everyone's too scared to deal with him. We've been teamed together ever since."
You realize you've been standing in the same spot ever since Kazuya begun talking, completely entranced by his story. He chuckles upon seeing your expression and ruffles your hair. 
"Man, I sure rambled a lot. Sorry about that. In any case, that was my piece about Daitou. I'm sure you already know this, but he's not a bad guy. Just has a twisted sense of loyalty. Once he finds someone to serve, he doesn't see anything else.
Hell, I'm his closest friend and I'm convinced he wouldn't hesitate to kill me if it was for Boss."
Upon further consideration, he smiles and winks at you.
"Or for you. Especially you."
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lowkeyerror · 11 days ago
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Talk it Out
Agatha Harkness x Rio Vidal x Reader
Word count: 1.5k
Notes: Agatha All Along Finale Spoilers, Angst, I guess it's hurt/comfort, happy ending
Summary: The confrontation between Agatha and Rio goes differently with you there to mediate.
An: I've been itching to write for Agatha. I check the tags everyday for new fics, so I thought maybe I should contribute. Hope you like it
Masterlist
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“Are you guys really going to do this? There has to be another way?”
Dark skies with ominous clouds loomed over Agatha's backyard. Rio was perched on the rooftop magic buzzing in her hands. Agatha stood on the ground exhausted from the trials of the road.
You found yourself standing in between the two.
“Darling, there is no other way. I don’t want to hurt you, don’t make me hurt you,” the rage dims in Rio's eyes as she looks at you.
You turn to the other woman. She’s trying to activate her powers, to no avail. You see a panic rise across her features. It's then that Rio begins her attack. When Agatha is flung back, you can’t help but scream her name.
“AGATHA!”
You attempt to run to her side, but vines snake their way up your legs keeping you in place.
“Rio please,” you plead with her.
Agatha answers, “She’s not going to listen to you sweetheart. Death is unkind, cruel even, and she cares for no one.”
Tears brim at your eyes hearing those words. Your whisper doesn’t get lost in the chaos, “That’s not true.”
“You can lie to yourself all you want Agatha, but she knows you’re full of shit,”  Rio hurls a vine at the witch leaving a nasty cut on her ankle.
“Look around Y/n, does this look like love,” Agatha spits out before her back connects with a tree.
Wires and vines alike start to wrap around Agatha, keeping her in place. Rio stalks towards her in a predatory fashion.
“End of the road Agatha, and you know where all roads lead.”
Agatha starts to beg for her life. This whole scene pulls your heart in two different directions.
Your magic was weak in comparison to most, but in this moment that didn’t matter. It was enough to escape the hold from the vines.
Just as Rio was going to blast Agatha out of existence you step between the two. Your hands outstretched to shield Agatha.
“Take me instead,” your gaze is soft when you meet Death’s stare.
“No,” Agatha and Rio speak in unison.
You shake your head, “You don’t get to say no. You need a soul and I’m offering mine.”
“It- it’s not your time,” Rio's excuse is flimsy.
“I’ve been around just as long as she has. I’ve sat by and watched her do the things that she did. I am your lover, just like she is. So you’re taking my soul.”
Agatha protests again, “She can’t have you.”
You turn to face her, “She already does, my love. I do not fear her as you do. I do not resent her. Spending eternity with her does not scorn me. I love her just as I love you.”
A scowl grows on Agatha’s face, “How can you forgive her?”
Rio wants to speak, but you place your hand on her chest, causing her to hold her tongue.
You squat down to Agatha’s level. Your hands caress her face, “I am grateful for what she gave us Agatha. Are you not? We’ve been alive for centuries, yet nothing has ever come close to those 6 years.”
“She took him from us.”
You shook your head, your voice was delicate, “He wasn’t even meant to take his first breath. We might’ve made him from scratch, but there’s only one person that gave him life, and you hate her for it.”
“He was my son too,” Rio speaks, no longer in her fighting stance.
Her eyes boring into Agatha, with a sorrow only death could convey.
Angry tears welled in Agatha’s eyes, “In the middle of the night. When we couldn’t even say goodbye. I was going to- I was going to do better for him, Rio.”
“I had to take him, and if either or you asked me not to… I don’t think I would’ve been able to do it. Don’t you think I would’ve loved to see him grow, Agatha? He was so much of all of us even at that age.”
“He was smart and cunning like you,  Agatha. He had your affinity for nature and balance, Rio. And he.. .”
“Was kind, just like you sweetheart,” Agatha finished your sentence.
Rio frowns, “I took no joy in taking him. In fact, taking a soul has never hurt so much. I didn’t just lose Nicky, I lost you too.”
“Tell her the truth,” you say to Agatha, who shifts a bit under your gaze.
“There’s nothing to tell,” her sentence falls flat at the end, in the way it does when she's lying.
Your tired eyes look at her, “Agatha, please.”
“I ran because I’m scared. Not of you, but of facing Nicky. If he saw who I am, what I’ve become he would-"
“Love you anyway,” Rio spoke with certainty.
It’s then that Agatha fully drops her mask, vulnerability on full display, “How are you sure?”
“You never hid yourself from him. He knows what kind of person you are, he always did. Maybe he wanted you to change, but he still loved you the way you were,” Rio spoke it like a fact.
It broke Agatha. She began to sob, “I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. I’m sorry.”
You began to free Agatha from her spot against the tree. Rio instantly broke the binds after watching you struggle. She was cautious in her approach, of the two of you.
Rio wraps her arms around Agatha. Agatha melts into the embrace, the warmth comforting her. Rio begins to wipe away the woman’s tears.
You watch with a tender gaze and relief flooding through your features.
“No more fighting,” you look between the two of them.
“What about Billy?” Agatha clears her throat, trying to regain her composure.
Rio deflates, taking a step back from Agatha, “I still-”
“I told you to take mine,” you speak up.
Rio’s eyes darken, “I won’t.”
You invade the woman’s personal space. Your arms settle around the back of her neck. You lean into her, forehead resting against hers.
She breathes you in calmly. Eyes fluttering close. You kiss her, deeply. You don’t focus on the pain coursing through you, but rather the softness of her lips, the eagerness of her hands, the warmth of her body.
You can feel yourself slipping, but it doesn’t go too far as you are roughly shoved away from Rio.
“ARE YOU CRAZY!” Agatha yells.
Your breath is ragged as your life force slowly returns to you, “Maybe.”
You don’t think as you shoot your magic at Agatha. You know her instincts, you’ve seen them in action. Without thought she begins draining you of your powers. As you crumble, she rises.
“AGATHA!” Rio’s voice echoes something deadly.
It knocks Agatha out of her trance and she quickly cuts the line between your power and hers. You lay flat on the ground with your eyes open towards the sky. You’re breathing is minimal but present.
Rio looks at Agatha, “You need to give her some back or she won't make it.”
Agatha’s hands are trembling and she tries to out the power back, but nothing is happening.
“She’s- she’s not taking it,” Agatha begins to mumble.
“Y/n you have to receive the power, you have to do it or you’ll die,” Rio says sternly.
“The soul,”  you mumble.
Rio growls, “Forget about the soul, I’ll figure it out, just please.”
Before Agatha can put the magic, back into you again, you’re hit with a bright blue ray of energy. The force with which it hits you makes you jolt into an upright position.
“Is she going to be alright?” Billy jogs over to the scene in front of him.
It’s not what he thought it was going to be originally and for that he’s grateful. Fighting Death was not anywhere near his bucket list.
“Did you-”
“I-I came to fight and then I saw… everything. It just made sense to help,” Billy’s eyes search all 3 women.
You answer him first, “I’m alright, everything is fine.”
“A-are you sure?”
You look to Rio, who is already looking at you, she tells the teen “You are free to go.”
He looks at Agatha first and then you.
“We will around if you need us, don’t fret. This is not a journey, you have to walk alone,” you tell him.
The boy is quick to wrap his arms around you in a hug. You squeeze him back and whisper in his ear, “We will help you find him.”
He nods at your words. He takes one more glance at Agatha and Rio before leaving the yard.
“When are you going to tell him about the road?” Agatha questions you.
“Later, after I’ve spent some time with the women that I love. Both of them,” you say hopefully.
Rio looks at Agatha, you both knew it was her call.
The woman let out a dramatic sigh, “Nothing too strenuous I'm exhausted from all of that hard work.”
“A bath would do you well,” Rio bites back.
Agatha rolls her eyes, “You just want to see me naked.”
Rio chuckles, “Well, it has been quite some time. I’m sure Y/n wouldn't mind an intimate moment with both of us either.”
You shook your head, “Not one complaint.”
“You’re both ridiculous,” Agatha speaks.
“You love it,” Rio counters.
Agatha looks at you and then Rio before letting out a sigh, “I love you both.”
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kismetarchive · 1 month ago
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Counting the freckles on König's face as you two lay on the couch after an exhausting day
cw: könig x gn!reader
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König's face was a privilege only a select few people have ever seen in his life — barely enough people to count on one hand.
Even amongst those select few, they didn’t see his face on a daily occasion. He keeps his identity locked behind his sniper hood, leaving only his heavy gaze as a small window to his soul; everyone except his schatz.
during the long deployments where he was left with only a polarid of you tucked away in a pocket next to his heart he'd stare at it every night, his heart tugging wondering if you were safe — if he'll make it back to feel your touch on his scarred body.
When he returns he immediately tugs off all his clothes, haggard hands tugging at your own so he could feel you as close as possible; to feel you intimately without the restriction of cloth or anything else, just limbs tangled together in a loving embrace.
You lay on top of König, his large physique dwarfing you in comparison as your hands interlocked with his and lips lazily brushing against each others lips as you laid comfortably under the fluffy blanket.
His mask was tossed into a random cupboard, clothes strewn off into a corner of the room and his eyes half lidded as he looked at your gorgeous figure under the mellow sunlight. Seeing you bask like an angel under the warm light of the evening.
You broke away from the tender kiss, eyes glancing across his chiseled cheeks and noting the faint freckles on his face.
"You have freckles." You spoke softly, not wanting to break the silent peace in the room.
"Ja, they're more visible in the summer." Konig replies back, his cheeks tinting red seeing the star-struck look on your face — like the simple dots on his face had carved their way into your heart.
"They're pretty." You'd hum, your lips gently grazing against his cheek and pressing a soft kiss against each one. König let you pepper kisses all over his face, letting himself be a canvas for your kisses as he floated away somewhere soft and away from the war-torn and violent world he was brought up in.
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「 Masterlist ❤︎ 」
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hayatoseyepatch · 5 months ago
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Description: Kaji would never eat another lollipop again if he could have his mouth on you at all times. Basically just oral with Kaji Ren.
Featuring: Ren Kaji x Reader
Word Count: 1.1k
Tags: smut, afab!reader, reader has a vagina, tried to make this one as gender neutral as possible, oral fixation, cunnilingus, face sitting, dirty talk, Kaji being a menace, written with a curvy reader in mind (but no indication of size)
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a/n: This honestly was supposed to be one part of a headcannon fic but then I got carried away writing this. So enjoy some Kaji lickin’ ya like a lollipop lmao.
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Kaji tries so hard to regulate his emotions. From his lollipops to keep his sharp tongue on lock, and the music he uses to drown out the world to keep his temper under control. He hated the way his rage over took him, made him feel like a wild animal, incapable of controlling his actions or avoiding hurting people.
But you had become an outlet for him. In most cases it was the way you were able to calm him with just your mere presence. The feeling of your nails scraping his scalp as you carded your fingers through his hair. The way the soft tone of your voice was able to snuff out his raging anger better than any melody. He’d always have his mouth busying itself with you. Whether it was the both of you cuddled up on the couch his mouth absent mindedly trailing kisses along your shoulders up to your neck. The way your lips pressed against his in sweet kisses that put his mind at ease.
However, there were times, times where you offered a different outlet for his raging emotions. Kaji could get lost in  your body, the way it made him feel, the way he would drown himself in the feeling of you. His lollipops long forgotten, the taffy paling in comparison of the sweetness of your cunt’s juices that coated his tongue, always eating your cunt like a man starved. He dives down, burying this face into your folds. His nose bumps your clit as his tongue invades your entrance, curling inside you. He collects your juices on the wet muscle, withdrawing from inside you he pushes himself up. Tongue lolling out of his mouth, allowing your juices, mixed with his own saliva, to drip down on your neglected clit.
He watches, enraptured, as the mix of your juices and his saliva drip down, coating your cunt in the both of you. He ducks down once more, licking a fat stripe up your cunt. Collecting your wetness on his tastebuds. “C’mere baby” He groans, his large calloused fingers entangling your waist. Using his strength, he easily maneuvers you both, now laying flat on his back with you straddling his waist. His eyes bore into yours as you look down at him. “I want you to sit on my face, sugar.”
Being a grade captain and constantly reeling in his emotions, being careful with every choice he makes is exhausting. Sometimes relinquishing his power to you is the best form of soothing, he trusts you fully and wants you to have your way with him. Just letting him encapsulate himself in the moment with you, just focusing on you both. As if the world outside and the one in his mind doesn’t exist, here its just you and him and the way you make each other feel.
Your cheeks flush a bright pink at his request, one said so simply it was as if he was asking you to pass him something. “But Ren.. What if I…” Your words are cut off, a heated kiss placed against your lips. He pulls away after a moment, breaths panting against your lips. “But nothing angel, sit on my face and let me eat your pretty pussy like its one of my lollipops” His words send a shock to your core, cheeks flushing a deeper red at the filthy words that leave his mouth, but also extinguishing any further arguments you had for him.
Shakily, you crawl up on the bed, throwing one leg over his face to sandwich his cheeks. You hover your cunt over his face, lifting the material of his oversized t-shirt to expose yourself to him. You exhale a breath, preparing to lower yourself onto his face. Before you can, however, his large hands grip your hips pulling you down to be flush to his waiting mouth.
A shocked gasp leaves your lips, and Kaji takes this opportunity to nuzzle his face in between your folds once more, tongue swiping out of his mouth to glide against your clit. “Oh, Ren, baby, fuuuck~ ” You moan, throwing your head back, losing yourself in the pleasure he’s providing. Your earlier worry and fear being tossed out the window as you grind your hips against his face.
Kaji lets one hand leave your hips, moving to grip the plush fat of your ass. He releases the soft flesh only to give your ass a harsh smack, the sound echoing throughout the room. He soothes the area, tongue never stopping its ministrations against your sensitive nub. Kaji devours you like a man starved, if you didn’t feel his shallow breaths against you, you would wonder if he was even breathing. He pulls away, hot breaths fanning against your clit. “That’s it angel, that’s my baby, go ahead and ride my face sugar.”
You don’t need to be told twice, sinking down until his nose bumps your clit, hips grinding down on his face. Kaji lolls his tongue out of his mouth to lick at your clit, breaking only to playfully nip it from underneath you. He grins against your cunt when you heed his words any hesitancy from earlier long gone. Your hips pick up speed, practically riding his tongue. He flattens the muscle, letting you do just that. The words that tumble out of your mouth are nothing more than incoherent calls of his name mixed with pleas and curses. Kaji feels your thighs spasm, both hands now gripping your ass, to pull your cunt further onto his face.
Your hips bucking against his tongue, as you cry out a mix of curses and his name. You can feel the coil inside you about to break. “Ren, Ren, please…fuck!” He mumbles something that sounds like approval against your heat, and that’s all it takes for the dam to break. You release with a scream, thighs trapping his head between your legs, only releasing once you’ve come done from your high.
With the last bit of energy you can muster, you remove yourself from on top of him settling into his chest, nose nuzzling into the crook of his neck. His arms wrap around you, pulling you close, lips pressing against your forehead in a gentle kiss. “So proud of you baby, did so good for me, I love you so much.” He says softly meaning every word. When your breathing had evened out, your joint actions from earlier lulling you to sleep, Kaji thinks about how no song would ever compare to the sound of your contented breaths as you sleep, tucked safely in his embrace.
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Thought Kaji deserved some attention since he wasn’t in the last one. I’m thinking of writing for the loml Tsubaki next~ Hope you enjoyed, see you in the next one!
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rheakira · 6 months ago
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I've come to temporarily break my hiatus to bring up something deeply important. Because after a recent event, if I have to go another day without talking about it, I don't know what I'll do.
Fandoms have an enormous issue when it comes to bigotry and people feeling comfortable enough to be openly bigoted.
And I want to make it clear: everyone is capable of it. In fact, most people do it more often than they don't. But because this strange myth has been built up that if you aren't "blatantly saying slurs" or "killing others" it can't possibly be bigotry, we have done nothing but become dangerous behind closed doors.
If your friend has odd beef with a person of color in the fandom and holds them to standards they don't hold their white friends to, that is bigotry. If your friend feels some sort of way about the trans person in your friend group and tries to come up with reasons for why they specifically can't stay, that is also bigotry. If your group insists that a person with a personality disorder is making it up just for attention and uses that as a reason for why they can't be around them, that is bigotry as well.
I've never been upfront about it because... why do I, as a human being, need to be upfront about my identity when people randomly decide what I am? But I am in fact a person of color who is queer and disabled. Whenever I join a fandom group that is mostly white people, I am liked until this is discovered. And then I watch as people get brutal about things I do or say. Things that they don't do to other people in the group, and I also watch as they take my words and either twist them for convenience or ruin my reputation for it.
As a marginalized person, both in fandom and out, you are held to a unique standard that does not apply to other human beings around you. It makes doing what you love very difficult, because unfortunately as a marginalized person, people will always subconsciously side with the person trying to oppress or attack you. This has happened to me my entire life, from school to work spaces to even internet spaces claiming to be safe places.
People will say that they care about you and like you and even form a friendly bond with you, but the moment a person of privilege decides they do not like you very much, they can and will side with the other person even without proof of their issues with you. It's exhausting and ruins lives in places that should be fun and safe.
I am on my umpteenth experience with this exact cycle and I would be lying if I said it didn't make me feel like I couldn't live or breath in places I should be allowed to be involved in. It's a very real problem that refuses to end because no one has the courage to challenge it. I am speaking not only on my own experiences, but for the many other people of color or queers or disabled people who simply cannot join these so called "safe spaces" because of our identities conflicting with people who have been taught that we are lesser and not worth love or care.
If this is a problem you face, please know that I see you and I love you. It's hard to keep surviving in a world that wants to hurt you and leaves you abandoned and alone. I want you to know that the world is scary, but we all exist. You should be allowed to experience joy and fun without feeling like you're being suffocated and wanting to die.
You matter. The people around you that make you feel like you don't are nothing by comparison. You matter and I truly hope that we'll one day find each other and become the safe space that we deserve.
The marginalized people in your fandom are more important than your fictional characters and plotlines that you put above us. We're here and we're not leaving. Learn to live with us and protect us.
If we're truly your friends, you would care when your privileged "friends" want to remove us.
Additionally, please do not take this rant and make it only about white people who are part of these marginalized categories. This is a post about EVERYONE. Including the people of color around you. Do not remove us from this conversation. Care about ALL OF US if you support this at all. Thank you.
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majestyeverlasting · 1 year ago
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A Little Less Restless
Pairing: Bucky x Reader (friends to lovers)
Summary: As Bucky finds himself within the still familiarity of Brooklyn, he comes to realize that he deserves nice things. And, most of all, that he deserves you.
Word Count: 2k
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A/N: I haven't posted any new writing in a bit, and it feels good to be resolving that (yay me). Please enjoy this piece I wrote today. Lot's of fluff and very obvious feelings. It's been a while since I wrote something for him. <3
Three knocks sound on Bucky’s front door as his reflection stares back at him in the bathroom. He's leaning close to the mirror in careful criticism. Enough to see the green flecks in his irises. The freckles on his cheeks from being in the sun. The pricks of hair making up his scruff. Then he eases back and squares his shoulders. They fall after he releases a breath. 
He prays he doesn’t look as restless as he feels. 
The smile you give him when he answers the door carries a warmth he isn’t sure he deserves. But he takes it because that’s all he can do. Enjoy it like a man who’s been cold his whole life. By some miracle, he feels himself smiling back in that small, weighted way of his. It was a trade off of sorts, and now you’re even. No outstanding debts. 
He motions you inside with a soft please, and you study him once you’re in the foyer. In the few seconds that you’re silently observing, Bucky wishes he knew exactly why. As tender as your gaze is, heat was already rising to his cheeks. But like everything else when it comes to you, he takes it. Looks right back at you shyly, pushes his hands into his pockets, and waits. 
“Your hair’s shorter,” you finally say, smile growing wider. “Did you cut it?” 
“Cut it,” he repeats like a question, hands moving to run through it. The previous night creeps back to the forefront of his mind. 
When he’d gone for a walk to get some air and inadvertently found himself being drawn in by the red, white, and blue barber’s pole spiraling on the next block. It’d been ages since he’d gone to a professional, but walking inside to the faint scent of tobacco and aftershave made him feel as though he’d never stopped. 
“Mhm,” you hum, certain. 
The stumped look on his face vanishes like it was never supposed to be there. “I went and got it trimmed at a place called Ricky’s last night.” 
“And you forgot that quickly?” Next thing he knows, you’re wrapping him in an embrace, peeking up at him after a few seconds, “I’m teasing.” 
He squeezes you back tighter. 
It’s you who eventually pulls away, and he finds himself trailing you as you venture deeper into his apartment, eyes roving thoughtfully. A coffee table now complements the couch in the living room. The walls are no longer bare. At long last, the space was beginning to look more like a home. 
For the longest time, Bucky had only seen it as a place to rest his head after countless assignments that took him miles away. It didn’t need to be anything special, or so he thought. One of the first things you told him upon coming into his life was that he needed a constant. A place to come back to that he could make his own. That was his. He’d spent so much of his life serving other people and belonging to other people that he was finally learning what it meant to be his own. 
It was exhausting not being halfway across the world with a task to busy his mind. Brooklyn was still in comparison. A place where he could recognize street names, faces, point out buildings that used to be something else when he was a kid. And now there was you, who made being stateside worthwhile in a way he didn’t think was possible. He realized then, how much he’d deprived himself of meaningful connections outside of work. 
“It looks great in here, Buck. What’d I tell you?” Your earnesty is genuine. Makes him, as old and borderline cynical as he is, feel special. “You’re gonna have to start inviting me over more.” You shoot him a wink, and he freezes because of the weight of the implication. If you notice, you don’t say anything. 
A few months ago you’d been strangers crossing paths. Then acquaintances. Now friends who cared about each other a whole awful lot. Only, it was more obvious on your end. He kept most of his sentiments guarded, not yet ready for them to bleed out like an open wound. It didn’t help that you were always wielding a knife, coming closer and closer to cut through the wall he built around himself. 
“You can come over whenever you want,” he says. “I’m always here.” 
“When you’re not on assignment,” you add. “And I know. I just don’t want to scare you away.” 
Bucky frowns at the suggestion, but his lips eventually turn up. “Good thing you’re not a scary person,” he says, counting on earning a laugh. Something. 
And you do, right before shaking your head. “I’m serious.” 
“You couldn’t scare me away,” he assures. 
You nod slowly. “So how’ve you been?” There’s something else lingering on the tip of your tongue, so he waits it out. It ends up punching him right in the gut. “You look…I don’t know.” 
It hadn’t been all too long since he’d come back from Morocco. Only a week. And it would be a while before he was sent out anywhere else. His mind was in the constant process of drifting to the type of thoughts all men sifted through when they have nothing but time. Those regarding purpose, belonging, and meaning. Not to a deep, crippling degree, but enough to make him want to spring into some sort of action. Find something to indulge in that wasn’t saving the world. 
Bucky swallows and shifts his weight. “Restless,” he offers. “Didn’t think you’d notice.” 
“I’ll always notice.” Silence stretches between the two of you and a siren wails in the distance. “Maybe we can go out tonight, just you and me. Is that something you’d wanna do?” The question sounds shy. 
What you didn’t know quite yet is that he’d probably do just about anything if it was with you. 
***
At the end of the night, it’s Bucky who pulls out his card and pays for dinner. Not even giving you the chance to think about digging into your purse. As an old tune continues playing overhead, your grateful eyes sparkle at him from across the table. 
Neither of you had dined here before. It’s one of the places Bucky said used to go by a different name and was run by a different family, Italians. You liked listening to him talk about what once was because it made you realize just how much he knew. Just how thoughtful and reverent he was when it came to the good memories he had. 
Being listened to so intently was new for him. But he enjoyed it. Especially when you’d ask questions or bring up a point he made further back in the conversation. By the time the waiter comes back around with his card and his copy of the receipt, the two of you are basking in the memory of the evening and thinking about what the rest of the night may hold. 
“This was really nice,” he says, folding his napkin and setting it aside on the table. Then his expression becomes consumed by a certain solemness. “I don’t know how well it comes across, but I need you to know that I appreciate you. A lot.”
Your heart nearly bursts. “I know, Bucky,” you promise. He still looks unconvinced, so you extend your hand face up on the table for him to take. “I know.” 
The cab ride back to his place is quiet. You hold onto his hand the whole way, relishing the feeling of his thumb tracing back and forth over your skin. It’s a gesture that says I’m here with, I’ll be here as long as you’ll have me. Brooklyn passes by in rushes of darkness peppered with light. Pedestrians walk alongside the streets, some holding hands just like the two of you. It isn’t long before the driver pulls up alongside the curb of the complex. 
It isn’t until you’re in the elevator that you’re sure that you want to stay. 
The two of you get off at the fifth floor. 
“Is it okay if I spend the night? If not, I completely understand. I know it’s such short notice,” you ramble as he’s turning his key into the door. He hopes you don’t notice the way he falters. But part of him knows you do. You don’t miss anything. Luckily for him, you’re just as fazed by your own question, holding your breath. 
It’s not until you’re inside that he graces you with an answer, “‘Course you can.”
Your shoulders drop in relief. What you’re not expecting is the laugh he tries to bite back. Maybe it was mean of him, but he liked knowing he could make you sweat. Sometimes it seemed like it was only ever you who made him openly anxious. 
“You’re terrible,” you accuse, failing at restraining a smile. “Absolutely horrible.” You’d forgotten to throw away an empty water bottle before you left, and it’s the closest thing you’re able to throw his way in retaliation. He catches it and tosses it in the trash himself. 
Mischief written all along his smile when he starts towards you. 
Partly scared and partly excited, you think to flee at the last second. After a few measly steps, you’re being pulled back into the firmness of his chest. He’s sure enough laughing now, the vibration rushing straight into your back right along with the warmth of his body. So are you. He only has one arm secured around your waist and, despite the fact that he’s not even trying, it's enough to hold you. 
“Wait, wait, wait—hold on a second!” your words come out giggly both because you’re anticipating some sort of attack, and because he’s never held you quite like this before. Unlike a normal hug, this feels like he has you rather than you having each other. It’s vulnerable. Dizzying. 
“You win, you win!” 
“What?” he laughs in surprise. His mouth is so close to your ear that you shiver. “Thought you had more fight in you than that,” there’s a playful warmth to his words. 
You shake your head in denial and relax back into him. You didn’t stand a chance of winning unless he let you, and you were more than willing to tap out early. Because even so, you were still in his arms at his mercy, and somehow that felt like the safest place to be. By the time you realize both of your laughter has faded to a thoughtful silence, he’s pressing a featherlight kiss to the shell of your ear. 
When he lowers his arm from around your waist, you turn around to face him. 
There’s a ghost of a smile on his face. He suddenly looks boyish, younger. Having crawled out of whatever shell of crushing expectation and responsibility he usually resided within. 
When he cups your face and presses his lips to yours, his shoulders relax and his breaths slow. And for once, he indulges. In you. In the prospect of having someone to lean on and being leaned on in return. It’s a reminder that he’s allowed to experience nice things. To have a life to look forward to outside of lending himself to cause after cause. 
You’re soft, and warm, and everything good a person could be. He pulls away slowly after a while, blinking down at you with heavy eyelids. You’re looking right back at him like he’s the world itself. 
“Maybe you’re not so terrible,” you whisper, smiling. 
Of everything he was feeling now, restless wasn’t one of them. 
_
Thank you so much for reading! I promise I see every like, comment, and reblog and appreciate them all very much. 
To join my “taglist,” follow @taleseverlasting
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diorchids · 7 months ago
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after-class, simon ‘ghost’ riley.
cw; professor!simon, age gap, teacher-student, manipulation, oral, impact (spanking), size kink, degradation, rough sex.
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your professor was harsh. grading-wise, he never let the smallest things slide. he docked points pettily, even for minor errors. 
“thank you for your participation today, class dismissed.” as your classmates began to pack up, preparing for an exhausting day tomorrow. “but you,” he looks at you, standing in that small dress, in one of the front rows. “you will stay.” 
your mouth was left slightly agape, brushing the hair out of your face as you questioned yourself. did you forget to submit an assignment? a discussion post overdue?
you nod slowly as the last people begin to make their way out the doors. he spoke from his desk, sitting on it as he motioned for you to come down, “what are you waiting for? here, come here.” he said it in a way that made you feel dumb. you made your way to him, fingernails digging into your palm, sure to leave marks. 
you stood a few feet away from him, keeping an appropriate distance from simon. after all; he’s your professor. 
“your research paper; it was lousy. i wouldn’t have expected it from you, to be honest,” he said bluntly, emotions weren’t very visible. he was just… neutral. 
your face—on the other hand—was hot, a soft frown crept onto it as your head filled with thoughts. this was bad, but you couldn’t help but think of how long he must’ve thought about you and your paper. “i… professor riley, i honestly thought it was my best work,” you continued, “the writing was—” 
he interrupted blatantly, and you slowly inched closer subconsciously. “simon. call me simon.” your fingers fiddled with your dress before nodding. “yes, sir—simon.”
you stood in front of him as you two sat in an awkward silence, while he examined your body. your dress was just too short, not appropriate for class, too much showing. his big hand reached out to your dress, gripping and tugging it as you watched silently. your eyes were wide, his eyes were half-lidded as he sat back. “dress code.” 
it wasn’t a dress code. you have no dress code—he just wanted to touch you. 
he exhaled and pinched his temples, “y’know,” he sighed, “you’re a great writer, you know what you’re doing. but this… it’s unacceptable,” you’re not used to letting him down like this, always making sure to do your best in all of your courses. 
“you’re a big girl now. you’re borderline failing my course.” 
you blink back tears as you dig your nails deeper into your palm. you’re so sensitive, can’t even take a bit of criticism. he continued speaking as you listened intently. his hand slowly crept its way to your leg as you watched shamefully, failing to stop the man. 
“this could be bad for you, hm?” he asked, tilting his head. “i’m sure you wanna write in the future, don’t you?” he stood up, your tall professor towering over you, “you let me finish what i’ve started, and i could up your grade a bit.” he took advantage of the size difference, your height in comparison to him was, at the very least, small. 
you hesitated to nod your head. he was a professor wanting to take advantage of a student; how vile is that? 
“perfect.” 
you stood there aimlessly before he gently took one of your hands into his own and guided it toward his zipper. he held your hand against his bulge, urging you to squeeze and give him a good rub. 
simon lets out a low groan as you take his cock into your mouth. he cups your head gently, holding you in place as you begin to suck and lick on him.
his cock was thick, dragging in and out of your mouth as he pushed his hips back and forth, your warm throat taking him so well. he held the sides of your head, and you gagged around his ridiculous length each time he pushed into your mouth fully. 
“disgusting. look at you.” he pistoned his cock deeper as your eyes welled with tears before they down your face. his fingers tangle in your hair before pushing your head further down, your nose nestled in the short hairs along the base of his girthy cock. 
you needed air, you pulled off him abruptly as you coughed messily, catching your breath. your lips wrapped around his red, swollen tip perfectly while your hand stroked the base softly. 
his hips start to move rhythmically, his cock sliding in and out of your mouth roughly. he grabs your head tightly and starts thrusting deeper into your throat, pushing past the back of your mouth. “take it all. just like that.” he continued to use your throat as a fleshlight.
simon’s cock throbs in your throat, his balls slapping against your chin. your head is pounding by now, your legs burn and your neck hurts. don’t forget what you’re doing this for. 
“fuckin’ delicious, fuck.” he grinds against your face harder, his hips moving at a rapid pace as he approaches his climax. 
he groans loudly, his hot seed shooting down your throat in powerful spurts. he pumps his thick cum deep into your mouth, filling it to the brim. he continues to hold you in place, his cock twitching as he unloads it all into your mouth. “swallow it all,” he said in between labored breaths, still softly thrusting himself into your mouth.
“what an angel you are, hm?” you choke and gag as he pulls out, a thick string of saliva connecting your lips to his cock. he pants heavily with a smile plastered on his face while looking down at you in satisfaction. 
you’re bent over his desk as he delivers another painful strike across your ass, dress driven up to your hips as you squirmed. “you’re almost ready.” he said, big hand soothing your burning cheek. 
“hurts s’bad, sir—simon!” you cried out while his thick fingers made its way to your cunt. his thumb sat on your slit as he massaged your clit through your panties, small cherries on all over them. his finger dipped into your underwear, running over your wetness as you felt shame wash over you. 
doing all this just to not fail? letting your professor touch you like this—sucking him off while your friends were probably asleep. desperate was an understatement.
he played with your cunt ‘till you came all over him, poor thing can’t control your body, huh?
his thick cockhead tapped against your flush cunt, all sensitive and puffy from the abuse it’s suffered. you felt how big his cock was as it poked at your hole, his large hand guiding it up and dragging it all over your hole. he pushed into you as you cried in pain, tears rolling as he bottomed out inside of you. at least tried to.
his hands rest on your waist, gripping your hips as he fills you up to the hilt, groaning out disgusting degrading words, mumbling ‘bout how tight you are. 
“god, you’re tight. such a little thing—takin’ your teacher like this,” he delivers a harsh strike to your soft ass, “knew you’d be up for it.”
he dragged his heavy cock out of you just to plunge it back in, deeper. “mr. ri—simon! s’too big! n-no, no, no, slow down!” you cried out loudly as he held you in place, making sure you took him all the way. 
he chuckles softly and begins to thrust faster, his cock stretching you open as it slides in and out. he leans down to capture one of your nipples in between his index thumb, rolling and pinching harshly as he fucks you. “it's okay, you can take it. you’re gonna take it. you want a good grade.” his words reassuring, but also bits of condescension poked through. 
salty tears fell onto his desk as your legs trembled from the overstimulating heat in your tummy. 
simon picks up the pace, his hips slapping against you as he takes you harder and faster. he continues to roll your nipple, his free hand moving to grope your ass cheek. “tell your—tell your teacher how much you love his dick, tell me.” 
this was odd. he knows it’s wrong, to do this with a student. he acknowledges it, yet he loves the power he has over you. you’re like a puppet. 
you act like you don’t want it. you do. the way you suck him right back in, the way your gummy walls grip and squeeze his thick cock, you need this. 
“love it… love it s’much! feels so good, simon…” you cried loudly, making sure he heard you. 
his thrusts become deeper and harder, his cock hitting your deepest spots with each powerful stroke. simon’s free hand leaves your ass cheek to wrap around your throbbing clit, rubbing it roughly against your sensitive folds. each time his finger runs over your puffy clit, your walls tensed around him, practically choking his length. “that’s it… that’s it, cum for me.” 
with a final, rough thrust, simon groans loudly as he empties himself deep inside you. he slows his movements, his cock pulsating rhythmically inside you. he looks down at you, affectionately stroking your hair. he holds you tightly, your bodies moving in a rhythm as he continues to pump his seed into you.
he thrusts a few more times, getting those last spurts of cum out. 
“we can—we can discuss your grade tomorrow. how’s that sound?” his hand soothed your ass as you nodded. 
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lovelybluebirdie · 10 months ago
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A sight to behold
Astarion x gn!Reader
Summary: Astarion is far more than his beauty, and you want him to know.
Word Count: 1,7k
fluff, comfort
[AO3]
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“You should get some rest, love,” Astarion whispers against your hair. He holds you comfortably in his arms, your fingers loosely grasping the end of his collar while his hand strokes along your waist, caressing your battle-bruised skin. 
Usually sleep didn’t take long to claim you after an exhausting day of defeating vigorous creatures or learning another disturbing fact on the tadpole inside your brain, but tonight it seems to avoid you for some reason, leaving you tossing and turning within your bedroll until Astarion eventually pulled you into a loving embrace.
“I’m good,” you mutter as a deep yawn escapes your throat, smothering your last syllables.
Astarion cups your chin between his thumb and index finger, surveying your face. “You’re a weary little love if I ever saw one.” 
“Fine, you’ve got me,” you reply in a drowsy voice. “Maybe I am a little tired, but somehow I can't find any sleep.”
His brow furrows. “Is anything troubling you, my dear?” he asks sincerely, pondering if he might’ve done something wrong.
The unpleasant thought has no room to spread its hooks any further, as he's met with only fondness from your tired eyes, leaving his ribcage bursting with adoration.
“No need to worry about me, Astarion. I promise, everything’s alright,” you assure as you begin to massage his ears, causing them to twitch.
“You still need to get some sleep though,” he scolds with half-closed lids. It's more of a moan, as he’s unable to suppress his desire for your blissful fingers to go on. You seem to know exactly where he enjoys them most, he notices, when another quiet groan spills from his lips. 
You brush the pointy tip of his ear once more, cautiously not to overstimulate this sensitive part of him, before you rest your fingers on his neck and playfully raise an eyebrow.
“Perhaps you’ll allow me to indulge in your beauty a little longer before I find myself dozing off.”
A benign remark, and yet something inside Astarion shifts. Something he can’t fully fathom at first, a faint sense of melancholy starting to linger, despite the comfort of your touch.
He’s been called beautiful more times than he can remember, but he’ll never be able to judge for himself, being robbed of his reflection since Cazador turned him into a vampire spawn centuries ago – his own appearance remaining a dark shape from his past.
“Beauty you say?” he mumbles quietly. “Tell me then, what is it you see when looking at me?”
Your expression softens as you grasp for his hand and squeeze it lightly. It seems you’ve already caught his musings, as you often do, without him needing to vocalise that something’s on his mind.
“Well, your most outstanding features are probably your piercing eyes – crimson, like rubies,” you explain before resting a kiss on his cheek. 
Astarion listens attentively. His gaze must indeed be exceptionally sharp, he thinks, trying for a brief moment to recall the colour his eyes were before he was turned, but to no avail. A shiver runs down his spine as he wonders if you might think of him as a dangerous predator at times, uncertain whether this poses a pleasant or a frightening notion.
“Sometimes they’re full of anger, resembling freshly shed blood. And other times they’re… so soft. Reminding me of the cutest puppy eyes I’ve ever seen, almost competing with Scratch,” you giggle as you draw your thumb along his cheekbone, right where your lips parted from his skin.
Astarion stares at you in bewilderment. “What do you mean – puppy eyes?! I’m a century-old vampire spawn, not some gushing maiden.”
“You asked what I’d see when I’m looking at you, didn’t you?” You offer him a mischievous grin before blowing a strand of hair off his forehead. “Or do you prefer me to stop?” 
Astarion rolls his eyes and lets out a sigh. “Fine, go on.” 
Although not particularly delighted by the comparison you draw, he can’t resist the urge to listen to you further describing him.
“There are also your beautiful white curls – so smooth that I often find myself wondering which soap you use for them to stay that way,” you say as you take one of said strands between your fingers. “Come to think of it, those are probably one of my favourite parts of you, my love.”
“Mhm, I certainly have the best hair in camp,” Astarion purrs approvingly, a smug grin playing around his lips, vanishing the furrow on his brow from your previous remark.
“Don’t let Shadowheart hear,” you joke before continuing. “Of course I also adore your smile – seeing those little wrinkles when you laugh.”
Astarion’s grin freezes as he quickly feels the spot beneath his temples.
“My sweet, you surely must’ve noticed by now that one of a vampire spawn’s rare perks is eternal youth, so I’m quite positive that there are no such things as wrinkles on my face.”
“If you say so,” you chuckle as you reach for his hands to press loving kisses on his fingertips. “This was supposed to be a compliment, you know.”
“Perhaps if I wasn’t your lover, but your doting grandmother,” he grumbles with pursed lips, but doesn’t pull away. 
“I sense you desire to listen to some of your less grandmotherly features, then?”
Astarion battles another grin but loses, his lips twisting to a wry smile. “Yes, please.” 
It's true, he doesn’t want you to stop, secretly enjoying how sincere you express your sentiments.
“Let’s see if I find some, though…” you tease, earning a gentle nudge to your hip before your eyes are glued to his face again. “Honestly, you're stunningly beautiful, Astarion – a goddamn sight to behold.” 
Astarion’s smile widens at your flattery. “Oh dear, that sounds far better than being described with the attributes of an old lady.”
“As I thought,” you reply, brushing one of his curls behind his ear. “But do you want to know what I adore about you most?”
Astarion's eyes grow round. “As humble as I am, I'm always thrilled to receive some more praise.”
He notices a flush to your cheeks as you let your finger slowly trace along the bridge of his nose, until it comes to a rest on his lips. 
You clear your throat, seeming in search of the right words. 
“You’re so much more than your beauty,” you begin, your fingertip still resting on his bottom lip. He presses a kiss, his curiosity roused.
“I love the way you make me laugh, like no one else can, despite all the madness we have to endure. Or watching you reading for hours, chuckling at little passages you like. Seeing how you squint when you take in the details while you embroider a piece of fabric.” 
You pause to cup his face in your hands and smother him with gentle kisses, starting at his jaw, moving up to his nose and then his eyes. Astarion remains silent, graciously relishing your warmth. 
Your words and touch are like a balm, and not for the first time he wonders how he came to deserve such kindness.
“Your skin is cold, yes, but no one has ever kept me this warm when being in their presence. You’re brave, and despite everything you had to endure, you turned into this wonderful man I came to love more than everything I ever held dear. You're most precious to me Astarion, and I never want to spend a day without knowing you by my side.”
It’s not often that Astarion finds himself speechless, and yet your genuine affection robs him of the ability to respond. He has to hold back tears that dwell behind his fluttering lashes.
Deprived of his ability to speak he can only press a kiss to your forehead, followed by another peck to the tip of your nose, before his lips crash into yours – hastily, in need of you.
Astarion can sense your pulse quickening as his tongue enters your mouth, a soft moan escaping your lips while your hand runs through his hair. 
He gently bites your lower lip, the initial rush of his kiss replaced by a sudden tenderness, a flutter spreading right where his dead heart once beat.
Astarion has never felt like this with anyone but you. Perhaps you've turned him into a love-struck maiden after all, he thinks with a smile as he kisses you once more, gentle and soft, before your lips part and he glances at your endearing eyes, finding his voice again.
“I love you too, you cheeky little thing. Even if you have the guts to describe me like a grandmother first, and then almost make me weep from your loving words,” he chuckles while grasping the fabric of your nightgown to pull you closer against his body.
Astarion is used to conceal his emotions behind his jesting shell, and yet when he’s with you, his façade naturally crumbles.
“Guilty as charged,” you reply fondly.
“But honestly… Thank you,” Astarion speaks softly. “For seeing me, like no one else does.” His words come out raw, honest. “You know I don't pray to any of the gods, but if I did, I'm sure I would've caught myself thanking them for bringing you into my life. You're a vision, and through the time I spend with you, it almost feels like my dead heart starts beating again.”
“You’d better stop with that loving talk yourself, before we'll both start to weep,” you laugh as you reach for the corner of your eye, a single wet streak glistening on your skin.
Astarion moves up to kiss it away. “As much as I like to revel in our mutual affection, I don't wish to see more of your tears.”
“Well, perhaps we should call it a night then. I’m certain I’ll find some rest soon,” you whisper as you shift closer in the crook of his arm. 
“You truly should, as I'm positive there’ll be more shenanigans awaiting us tomorrow,” Astarion replies and places a kiss on your hair. “Sleep well, my love.”
“You too, Astarion,” you hum, sounding slightly weary again. Maybe sleep has decided in your favour after all, he thinks as he notices your breath becoming more even.
When you finally doze off in the safety of his embrace, Astarion's chest is filled with warmth over the love he holds for you.
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pinkie-quinns · 19 days ago
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rocker eddie/actor steve | exes to ???? (they're fucking but Steve doesn't have to be happy about it) | slightly nsfw | fame au p4
p1 p2 p3 p5 interlude p6
He sees Eddie again. He sees Eddie all the goddamn time.
Part of Steve wonders if Eddie’s like, drugged him or something. He feels all itchy when he’s not around him.
He likes sex, always has. But he’s never craved it like this. Never felt out of his body when he wasn’t being fucked into.
And sex has always been easy to find for him. Ridiculously easy with the fame. He could have literally anyone. Anyone.
He only wants Eddie.
It’s like his body is being rewritten, coded and encrypted. Your dick CAN get hard but only if your asshole ex is touching it.
He goes to work buzzed. Phantom of Eddie’s hands on his skin. It’s distracting.
Everyone else feels so dull in comparison. He picks up a guy at a club. He goes on a date with a co-star’s friend.
The only good thing about that one is Eddie fucks the ever-loving shit out of him when the pictures of her & Steve end up in People.
And yeah, it only makes the self loathing calcify in his kidney.
He’s letting this happen. He’s actively pursuing it. He can’t stop even though every 3am sneak-out makes him want to drive right off the Hollywood Hills.
He’s too old for this. He is. They barely even talk when they see each other. Steve keeps that way. If they’re doing this (and fuck him, they’re doing this), it can’t be more than sex. He deserves that much. He needs to have that much respect for himself.
He’s careful about it. Has to be after the Globes.
He doesn’t stay the night- ever. It’s not like Eddie’s famous enough that he’s gonna get papped leaving his place. Maybe if it was New York- but here? It’d be a waste of TMZ resources. Still, he’s careful.
It’s gotten to the point where he’s there more nights than not. Where he’s given up on trying to see other people. It’s gotta end. It’s gonna end. Eddie’s gonna leave on his tour & all the momentum will be gone and they’ll never see each other again & Steve will be grateful for it.
It comes faster than he’s expecting. Faster than he’s ready for.
Their rendezvous have drifted later and later into the night. Eddie caught up at rehearsals. Eddie dead-tired afterwards. And nights turn into just laying there, holding each other. It's dangerous.
Eddie’s leaving for Arizona the next morning. It’s their last night. He's been so exhausted lately. He should be focused on getting a good night’s sleep. But it's 2am and he’s kissing Steve like his life depends on it. Like he’s going off to war.
There’s something different in this, as it builds, as Eddie lays Steve down on his bed. As he caresses him.
It doesn’t feel like fucking. It’s not rough and desperate and mean the way it usually is. It’s sweet. Achingly sweet. It feels almost like… almost like…
He’s murmuring nothings as he kisses down Steve’s torso.
How beautiful Steve is. How lucky he is. How he wants them to stay right here forever. Wants them to never leave this room. And it’s– Eddie’s just caught in the moment.
Steve still feels all choked by it.
Then Eddie pushes into him and suddenly he’s 18 and he’s never done this before so they’re taking it slow and laughing and in awe of each other and Eddie’s talking him through it and he’s holding him tight.
The orgasm takes him by surprise. He cries out something he doesn't mean. That he can't mean.
Eddie doesn't hold him to it. He lights his cigarette when they’re done, just like always, even though Steve mumbles about lung cancer each time. He’s being casual. Cautiously casual.
“You should come to the New York show.”
“What?”
All that faux-distance is gone in a second.
His expression twists vulnerable. “Come to the show. Please. It’d, um. It would mean a lot.”
Steve scoffs, “That’s not what this is.”
“I know. Just um, figured. No harm in asking…” He trails off. Steve knows he’s hurting. He wears it so plain on his face.
Steve fights that awful urge to reach out, kiss him, comfort him. It’s not his job anymore.
“Don’t know if you remember, Munson, but I did the groupie thing for years. Didn’t exactly work out great for me.”
Eddie shuts his eyes tight, “Yup. Sorry. I know you did.”
They’re quiet for a long while. Eddie’s arm is around him, tracing patterns at his shoulder.
“Why New York?” Steve asks.
Eddie cringes. “I’m, um. Renting a place there right now. So, you know. Privacy. I, um, I might move after the tour’s over.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.” Eddie breathes, eyes blank, laugh cold, “Don’t you worry, Harrington. I’ll be out of your hair in no time.”
There’s something awful bubbling inside him. He says, “Sure, man.”
Eddie nods in agreement, puffs his way back into silence, “Needed a change of scenery.”
And it’s fine. They’re adults. They’re not anything to each other, anymore. It's not like they're together. Eddie can do whatever the hell he wants.
But Steve can’t shake the feeling that he’s running again. Can’t shake the feeling that he shouldn’t be.
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karasuno-planet · 5 months ago
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Taking care of you
Kageyama x manager!reader who gets migraines !
warnings: migraine pain, vision loss
wc: 0.8k
summary: self-assured reader gets a horrible migraine and needs help, despite never asking for it. (pre-established relationship w/ kageyama) (fem!reader)
a/n: I LOVE THE HAIKYUU FANDOM SMMMM <333 you guys are my favs. requests open !! and the tsukki academic rivals fic is in the works for anyone wondering...
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(gif not mine !)
One thing you had quickly learned while dating Kageyama is that he's not one for public displays of affection. You certainly weren't secret, hell pretty much everyone knew and was talking about you two, but you kept it private. Especially in front of his opponents. That's why it came as such a shock when you felt his arms aroudn you suddenly in the middle of a practice match.
To say you had a migraine that day was an understatement. Three days into the trining camp, in excruciating heat working late to help the team reform their entire strategies form the bottom up— you were exhausted.
But you were used to the migraines. It was something you could handle. The team is already under so much stress, especially Tobio. His sets hadn't been satisfactory, and he was re-learning everything he already knew from scratch. You couldn't imagine the pressure you knew he already felt, so keeping the pressure of your aching head a secret was nothing in comparison.
That doesn't mean nobody noticed, though. Walking into the first practice set of the day, Coach Ukai made a comment.
"Y/n, are you feeling okay?"
"Yes! Feeling good..."
"Okay, just let me know if you need to take a breather or something."
Had you already been exposed? The last thing you wanted was to be a burden on the team, but the floaters in your vision were a bit hard to ignore. And when the ringing in your ears set in, it got worse. Much worse.
By the third set of the day, you weren't faring well. You stood on the sidelines, taking notes on gameplay, when your vision started to black out completely. You widened your eyes to realize you couldn't see a thing. Your head pounding, you focused all your energy on just staying on your feet.
A deep voice yelled out, "Y/n? Are you okay?"
You recognized it as Daichi's voice, "Don't worry Daichi, I'm just fine..."
You heard Asahi chime in, "uh.. That was Kuroo talking...on the other side of the court..."
Before you knew it, Kageyama rushed off the court, running towards you and supporting you with his hand on your back, "Damn y/n, you can't see a thing, can you?" You recognized his touch and sent in front of you immediately.
"I'm okay, really."
"Sure.." he dismissed you. "I've got you okay? Must be scary, not being able to see..." he mumbled. "Can you walk if I support you? Here.." He started slowly helping you walk towards the exit of the gym.
"KAGEYAMA!" Hinata shouted, "What's going on??"
He sighed, looking back at the court, "She gets bad migraines, but she'll be okay, don't worry."
There was a collective sigh and chatter resumed across the volleyball court now that everyone understood the issue. Some players were wishing you well, but you could hear next to nothing with the ringing in your ears.
"I'm walking her to her room," Kageyama declared to Coach Ukai before continuing to support you to walk.
"Yeah, yeah, okay. SUGAWARA, get in there."
Suga jolted into action, stepping onto the court to fill Kageyama's place.
And that's the last moment you could clearly make out before you woke up.
You were laying on your back, a cold towel draped across your forehead and a blanket over your body. Tobio sat on the floor next to your bed, and turned around to face you quickly when you heard you moving.
"Y/n," he whispered. "Here, have some water." He handed you a bottle of ice water and you took a couple sips.
"Thank you..."
"No problem, but, why didn't you tell me something was wrong?"
"I'm sorry, I didn't want to distract you."
"That's ridiculous, your migraines are serious and I deserve to know."
"You're right, I'm sorry."
You felt his hand slowly wrap around yours, "No, I...I've been so stressed out and mad at myself I didn't even realize what that might do to you. So absorbed in my own world..."
"My migraine is not your fault Tobio."
"Drink some more," he pushed the water towards you, noticeably keepin ghis voice low and soft to not irritate your head.
You took another sip and sighed, "I'm serious. You have nothing to do with it."
"Regardless, I have everything to do with it now. I'm not leaving your side until you're back to one hundred percent, okay?"
"You don't need to do that."
"But I'm going to," he assured you, squeezing your hand tightly in his, "besides, I'm lucky to be your nurse when you've got quite a few people eager to see you..."
"Really?"
"Yeah, but I don't think those guys have ever whispered in their lives," he chuckled softly, "I told them to piss off until I say you're ready."
"You're the best, Tobio."
"I know."
Before you could even open your mouth to thank him, he pressed a quick kiss to your cheek and set you back in your thoughts.
"I don't mind taking care of you, you know."
[masterlist]
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ma1dita · 9 months ago
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lovers, or partners in crime
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a 'partners in crime' installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader
words: 2.1k
summary: (post-tlt) directly after ‘if you need to be mean (be mean to me)’, The one where Annabeth and Percy think you're guilty too. You realize his betrayal a little too late, and he's left you looking like an accomplice. Luke Castellan x fem!Dionysus!reader
a/n: eye twitches guys im gonna crank out happy asks after this bc this hurt to the point of me delaying it a few days. drink water and take care luke nation
(posted 2/2/24 & betad by ellie and lari ty ladies mwah @lixzey @mrsaluado )
Exhaustion creeps up on you slowly, then all at once.
It’s been a long week at Camp Half Blood—with trying to stop a war from starting between the cabins and praying to the gods that the trio can stop everyone’s godrents from destroying the balance of the world, you could say you were kept busy making sure the place doesn’t go up in flames. 
Taking orders from Chiron and your dad has been your daily routine from sunrise to sundown, and you were glad to have Luke’s arms to fall into at the end of the night. But you woke up alone this morning, and a heavy feeling in your chest that’s been plaguing you for a while now feels more prominent as you drag your boots across camp for another long day.
Exhaustion blinds us and dulls the senses, but so does love. Sometimes it was hard to tell which was taking effect.
How long were you willing to ignore the signs in front of you?
Maybe it was just another bad day. Your mind felt like it was playing tricks on you, still in a haze from Luke keeping you up the night before, the feeling of his touch still lingering in your pores—evidence of eyebags and lovebites carefully hidden under concealer. You find yourself almost walking in a dream state, before Katie calls out to you, tapping you on the shoulder.
“Did you hear? Annabeth’s back. It’s all gonna be over soon,” she exclaims, and the both of you sigh in relief. You’d do anything to get this over with and take a long break. The idea of a long weekend with Luke somewhere, anywhere but here sounds like Elysium in comparison to what you’ve put yourselves through recently.
“You see Luke anywhere, Katie?”
She hums, her hand reaching out to fix some of the trampled foliage along the path, before she looks up at you, shaking her head.
“Not this morning, no. Maybe he’s with Annabeth?”
You nod thoughtfully, stretching your arms back to soothe the tension in your back. You’ll find him sooner or later, now that this is all over.
You always do.
“Clarisse stole the master bolt.” 
Your fingers wound themselves tighter around Luke’s at Percy’s declaration, but you can’t help but watch your boyfriend’s face closely as the rest of the conversation passes in the background. It’s been a weird day, to say the least—helping to set up for Percy’s celebration, and Luke being tightlipped and distant the whole while. You don’t think he’s actually said a single word to you since last night until he dragged you into his cabin to see Annie and Percy.
“Everyone was ready to join the war here. To start fighting each other. An accusation against Clarisse…” you reason awkwardly, more of a question than a statement. Standing here with your friends, you feel like the odd one out. How could you miss out on Clarisse being the lightning thief? But Luke looks at the two kids in front of you as determined as the devil himself.
He knew. 
He spares you a sidelong glance, a smile quirking up on the scarred side of his face.
When did Luke start making plans without you? 
Taking a deep breath to calm yourself down, tranquility comes off of you in waves; you barely notice that Luke drops your hand until you hear him speak again. 
“You’ve stopped the war. You’ve saved the world. Now, it’s safe to tell Chiron and finish cleaning up the mess. I told him we needed to meet him away from the celebration so we can talk without any of Clarisse’s supporters noticing.” Luke crosses his arms, trying to avoid the reach of your powers and your scorching stare while his gaze is sharp on Percy, and suddenly, the heavy feeling in your chest has a name, revealing itself as doubt. 
How could you be so stupid? 
Eyes don’t lie, even if Luke does, and you finally see through him, so much that you fear you’ve found his other side. 
Annabeth grabs your hand, your head whipping to look at her as she speaks, “We’ll keep an eye on Clarisse while you’re gone. Make sure she isn’t going anywhere.” You feel your body shake with paranoia as you start to question everything until the daughter of Athena pulls you back to the present. Taking quick steps out of cabin 11, you take a glance back at Luke, seeing him look glumly at you from the doorway, and it reminds you of a simpler time five years ago, with him standing in the same spot he introduced himself to you on his first day at camp. This time, you don’t walk away.
“I’ll find you later, I…I just need to talk to Luke real quick,” you say biting your lip hesitantly. Annabeth’s gaze is cold as steel as she nods, doubt now running through her as well as she watches you walk back to your boyfriend. You catch him by the arm as he tries to glide past you.
“Hey, are you okay?” You’re searching for an answer Luke will never give you, not out loud—as he dodges your glances, keeping a distance between you two. 
“Come on, I’ve gotta go,” he gruffs, anxiety running off of him in waves as his hands fidget at his sides. The sun is setting, and he needs to finish what he was told to do.
“We still have a bit of ti—” He interrupts you swiftly, “Not enough.”
“I know you’re always in charge around here, but not everything can go the way we want, you know?”
Your lips turn into a frown at his words, and you wonder who it is you’re talking to. Surely, not the boy whose arms you fell asleep in last night. You used to be able to figure him out so easily, but now… he’s acting like you’re an enemy. The banter he deals doesn’t usually make you feel like you’re at the short end of a stick, and though he’s right in front of you, it feels like his mind is already miles away. You’re desperate to hold onto whatever you can though, not wanting to let go of whatever’s plaguing him.
“Angelface. Look at me. Percy’s a hero, everything else will fix itself, why are you so—”
Luke sighs, blinking slowly, and you’re surprised when he pulls your hands to his chest, placing them under his camp beads, so you stop speaking. 
You never know when the last time is until it happens. You didn’t think it’d feel like this.
“I need to do this.” 
He’s not talking about turning in Clarisse anymore, and your body reacts before your mind does, surging forward to hug him. Your fingers run up the expanse of his back, the smell of citrus and musk being familiar but the discomfort in his embrace is not. From here, you can’t see his eyes, but his heart rate accelerates as he wounds his hands in your hair, pulling you closer until the space between you is nonexistent.
“Please,” he mumbles. 
Is it a request? 
The shock runs through your veins as you try to think of what to say next—Luke’s never been one to beg.
“I’d do anything to protect our home, Luke, you don’t have to convince me when it’s the right thing to do.”
Your name falls from his lips, almost like he disagrees with what you said, and then you realize he’s begging you.
He’s asking for your permission. He’s asking you to let him go.
“You’re my home, Trouble. You know that right? You’re the only thing that matters to me.”
You try to nod, try to pull away to look at him but he presses you harder into his embrace, like he knows he won’t have the chance again. It hurts, though not in the way you expect.
“L-Luke, you’re hurting me.” Your breath quickens as you try to unravel yourself from him, but you’re unsure where he ends and you begin.
“Just a little bit longer.” 
Your nose buries itself into his neck, and you realize he’s trembling, but you can’t figure out who’s scared, him or you? Voices are echoing in your head and it’s too loud; you clench your fists into his orange camp shirt. Why do you always need to see the proof to believe it’s real? Why do you have to wait until the damage is done?
“I have to do this, Trouble. Everything will change and there’s no other way— either we win or we die. Failure isn’t an option for me. Not again.”
“I thought I was supposed to be the dramatic one,” you mutter, closing your eyes so you don’t have to face the truth for a while more, “but I still love you, despite it.” 
Despite this.
A watery chuckle escapes you, and his hands are trembling as he pushes a strand of your hair back. He holds onto you more softly now, and whether you know it or not, it’s to make up for all the time he’ll have to go without holding you after this. Percy calls out to him in the distance and once Luke frees you from his arms, you wonder why it feels like you’re unraveling at the seams, slowly parting from him. The tether you have on each other loosens, and it’s hard to tell who is being freed, and who is letting go. Luke walks away wordlessly, curls bouncing in the brisk air without a second glance until you call out to him.
“I’ll find you!”
A threat disguised as a promise, you stand there in the middle of the path feeling exposed as the wretched little girl at your core, desperate to be loved, desperate to be enough. 
But it’s not enough for him to stay, now is it?
—-
The truth is, Luke broke your heart before you even lost him, by hitting you where it hurts— he hit home. Camp Half-Blood has always been the one place you’ve known as home, and even if you claim to hate it—you’d die protecting it if that’s what was needed of you. You stay vigilant next to Annabeth, who looks up at your unusually quiet demeanor, and you feel like you have to confess to a crime that you didn’t commit.
“Luke’s leaving camp.”
She nods stiffly without answering you, wondering if you know about what else he’s done, too. Unlike you though, she’d rather find out before the damage is done.
The sun had set an hour ago, and fireworks were going off in the distance, everyone celebrating a hero’s return. You noticed Clarisse still sitting around the campfire with her siblings, Chiron still present and watching the festivities, and what had to be your last straw was noticing Annabeth had disappeared from your side. So you do what you do best, chase after Luke, and hope that you’re not too late.
Your breath heaves as you run through the dark forest without a single plan in mind and hoping, just hoping that no one’s hurt. You run faster towards the sound of swords clanging against each other, two figures illuminated by the fireworks in the distance.
What you didn’t expect to see was Luke’s sword pointed at an injured son of Poseidon sprawled out in the dirt.
“Percy!” your voice yells out shakily, your instincts kicking in as the truth is laid out in front of you, something darker and much worse than anything you could’ve imagined. Blue light illuminates the scarred side of your boyfriend’s face as he turns to look at you with shimmering eyes, and you see Annabeth with her sword raised at…the both of you.
Is this what love is… looking at a person who’s hurt you and still hoping they’re alright? You’re exhausted, wondering how long he’s been lying to your face—while he holds you, kisses you, and takes your pain away… and it all amounted to feeling guilty for letting his deception slip through your fingers and hurting the people you love. 
Luke’s scar you used to compare to a bolt of lightning now looks like a tear cascading from regret. And perhaps he does regret this, losing Annabeth and losing you, but he never turns back on his word once he’s made a decision. 
This one was just made without you. 
There’s a moment where everything goes silent despite the booming in the sky and you both take one last good look at each other, and Percy and Annabeth are unsure if you two look like forlorn lovers, or partners in crime.
“Castellan…”
His face hardens again at the wavering sound of your voice, almost unrecognizable in the dim light, and you know now that this is it. You’ve always been convinced that a love like the one you and Luke share is tailor-made and stitched together by the Fates. But the strings are cut, and like Atropos, he’s the one holding the scissors.
The last thing you see are his dark eyes and how he turns to run away, headfirst into a future without you. 
For a second you could’ve sworn they flashed gold.
“I wanted to hurt you
 but the victory is that I could not stomach it.” 
 -Richard Siken
next part: love like a blister: the five stages of loving losing luke
luke taglist (some won't let me tag, turn on my post notifs?): @kissingyourgrl @dorcas4meadowes @lorarri @andrewgarfldsgf @noodlesketchbook @10ava01 @poppysrin @ashisabitgay @timhalamet @liv1104 @leeknows-wife @mxtokko @bugcuti3 @luvvfromme @midmourn @2hiigh2cry @yuminako @niktwazny303 @lukecastellandefender @intergalactic-padawan @iliketopgun @annybah @dangelnleif @thegrinningghost @alyssajunelle @obxstiles @m00ng4z3r @visndcaitswhore @b0ok-lover @elegant-face-tree @this-barbie-is-having-breakdowns @amortencjja @idonevenknow1359 @maliaaaa @targaryenluvs @sakyira @dhdjdjjdhsjdiri @number-onekidqueen @nininehaaa @bradynoonswife @stevenknightmarc @hoodedhavok @happy-mushrooms @homebyeleven @anotherblackreader @too-deviant @liviessun @lilacspider @theadventuresofanartist @sucker4seresin @simpforsunwoo @zanzie @starrystormwritings
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